The Yak - Cheah Does Standup In Front Of 200 Sales Clients He's Never Met | The Yak 5-15-25

Episode Date: May 15, 2025

Believe Us This TimeYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. I'm the coolest one out of all of us. That was incredible. Hello, it's the Yak. Welcome in. Robak.com. Promo code Yak. 20% off your first purchase.

Q-zips, Polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. Robak.com. Promo code Yak. From a code yeah, 20% off your first purchase qzips polos hoodies joggers shorts row back calm promo code yak Julio's here again. Hello. Nick is back. Yeah, sorry. I was sleepy Getting rocked by a plumber. I Was the only person that didn't sleep? No one will call the I can't say to me you were the best player TV. You're the only chance they had Tate was okay. Yeah, yeah, Tate was easy. We were probably same level. Yeah, how's the comedy show really really fun? He's great. Julio. It was really great

I just got to say Nick is a natural guy needs to be doing comedy more nice And he needs to not worry about doing it the right way so other comics respect him because most comic are fucking losers To get just do what you got to do and do your thing Cuz you're amazing you're making that Yeah, what? Don't listen to what he's saying and don't worry about Comics yeah, is he not paying his dues by yeah comics have collectively decided that because they did it a way that took really long That no one is allowed to do it differently. He uses his parcel platform to get in right God forbid

She no tickets. Yeah, I cheated Nick is good enough a comedy that if he could do what he did yesterday for 10 minutes for An hour, I would say if I was his agent. I was like you're going on the road kid Oh, yeah. Well, thank you. Wait, should we put him on the road now, please? I'd like I will stop But I just want you know cuz I was giving him a pep talk after the show and I wanted him to know that it Was not just because I was drinking that I was giving it. I feel this way when I'm not drinking as well. Thank you wow Are you I thought that was just a yeah, it's the gang the fun thing about Nick is he's actually like Supremely confident he just gets off on people saying hey, dude. This feels so good

Dude, I yeah, dude everything you're telling me. I fucking know goes home at night and he cackles to Right now that's a phenomenon again fuck all those people that are yeah all the Hundreds all the comedians saying oh, yeah, suck in yeah, you don't fuck deserve this you think you could do my job without any practice Fuck that shit, dude It went well though great. Yeah, awesome great show. Are you doing it every month that uh? Maybe bi-monthly if they'll have us. Oh you're bi bi-monthly yeah

alternate months Big cat I have to apologize to you why I have not been able to think about this well at some point yesterday I winked at you oh did you not even notice no oh that's weird was it during the show I know you were walking walking by you walk by and I walked by and we caught eyes and I winked for some reason oh that's hot oh oh that's so hot. This is so nice. What did it look like? Wink at him now. I went, I went.

Oh. Wink at me during the show today, but don't tell me, like, wait till it's just casual in like an hour, just like lock eyes and wink. OK. I'll let you know. You didn't say anything as you winked? I winked, and then I was like, why would you do that?

Why would you wink at me? You were like, hey, man. I felt like I was getting too comfortable. Now I'm mad that I missed it. I think the weirder part was how you waited for him then in the Wilcompton bathroom for 10 minutes Yeah Divider yeah, I don't have sex Damn it Kate happy new show day. Yeah, thank you. It was fun. It was good 10 in a row

Yes, I did what I know I don't know where it came from Sneaky I mean it does every time this before before yeah, we all I suck I think you know what's that movie where he breaks his wrist he's a kid and then he could throw I think I'm like bent in such a way that I'm arced towards the basket now And I am like a natural roll man And look how far away from the basket. Yeah way away She's mean from the I mean that's a that's a three-point line for women Wow Megan is jumping rope don't you worry about why I think that was for the chat

Yeah, as it kept going I was like Are you getting tired? I? Hate is a better shot than how what the fuck Kate you made ten of those in a row I did Do you any of the dudes in here think they could do that all took was a little Size mark I could make ten of those any tips let me know but would you I? Could and I would would you I don't know if I would but I could make any tips let me know but would you I could and I would would you I? Don't know if I would but I could hey, this is I'll be honest. I don't have confidence that I that's like far enough to be Hard for anyone Danny ruined shot nine, but don't worry. I made way to goddamn sad

What did you play in the same Street League as Mikey bet I did actually I did I had a hoop in my driveway growing up and I like lived out there just shooting baskets all the time because I had no friends So balls life all his life you guys know how it is They're calling they're calling her show come the chat is spamming come They were in mostly being like cum heads reporting, just got done with cum. They love cum. Kate and cum mostly.

That's great. Kate and cum mostly. Looking like that name's gonna stick, huh? I think so. All right, cum heads. And not cum. What's up with all you cum heads? The comebacks?

Oh boy, open a new name changes. Comeback. Danny, how were you on cum? It was good, we only had like six names. He sucks actually. We only had like six names though. He's kinda ruin the show I'll be doing an around the office drama

Segment every week on Kate show and this one was investigating Evo's lost water bottle because he felt the need to set an office-wide slack chat asking for it. Oh, wait. We haven't we have a slice Yeah, yeah, all the cool kids are you on it? Oh all the cool. It's usually really only reserved for very important things I don't know. There's like ten other TJ's who you gotta talk to TJ's definitely on it So e-boats said to the whole slack wears my water bottle. Yeah, and he included a Google image of it So wait is everybody's chatting all day. Yes, they talk about us. It's really only used for like hey move your car Hey, where did this thing go? It's maybe used a couple times. We have the ability to get on it Yeah, of course if I don't know if I'd want to be I don't know

I'm trying to figure out how long it would take me if I couldn't ask someone to set it up for me No to get on the slack. Oh ever yeah at least a month It's a you'd be able to figure it. You just log in. You don't want to. Just pretend you can. I don't get it. Just log in.

Do they think we're stupid? Text messages. We have social media. Separates your business from your pleasure. People are addicted to chatting. Huh. I don't want to text somebody work questions. Where's Ebo's water bottle?

Email? It's less formal than email. It's faster than email. Somebody you know where's he both water bottle? Yeah email It's it's it's less formal email Speaking it he definitely left us all we have two different offices He probably left his he definitely left his claiming he had it yesterday in the cave during the yeah No doubt he left he did have it yesterday after the act in the cave Is it frowned upon to just go over there and talk like they might be busy? Well sometimes you communicate with people from New York, too. Got it.

Got it. I don't. By the way, we have a, the doors are closed today because we have a sales convention. We have a giant event happening. Big event. I didn't realize that this is, there's like, these people fell a minute ago.

They're on break right now, by the way. They're on break, we're not losers, okay? That was a funny setup. Only people sitting in the back. I didn't realize the extent of what this was going to be. Nobody did. Well, I... You did.

It was a future me problem. Yeah. MB and Ryan McDermott, who are great, who are part of the sales team, Ryan McDermott heads up the whole sales team, asked me in like, maybe it was Super Week. They're like, hey, there's this sales convention and they wanna host it at the office. And I was like, when? They're like, May. I was like, yeah, whatever.

I'll be dead. Sounds good. And then I came in today and I was like, wait a sec. They're everywhere. What are all these people doing here? I thought it was at night. I thought it was the ConLive audience. It's all day.

They're doing like, they had like, cause they asked me to speak for a minute and I was like, all right, tell me the schedule. I'll pop in. And they sent the schedule. There's like 15 seminars. Yeah. It's like every 30 minutes.

Minzy's speaking at the next one. Yeah. It's crazy. Oh, have you guys seen the latest Minzy thing? There's a few things. He came up to me already. He's already like, I got something. I'll be good for the Yak.

Check his Twitter. Oh. Usually when he thinks it's good for the Yak, it's terrible for the Yak. Um... Hmm. I don't know when it was. Maybe I just saw it. You're retweeting a lot. There it is. He's flying today.

He is flying today. And, uh, this, I, I... Oh! I gotta think... Wh time he found out about real ID was at the airport today oh I saw it no he's in the office gone yet he's going to be flying tomorrow oh okay I gotta get it today I know he's flying today he's flying tomorrow okay but uh oh yeah he's screwed he's not gonna be able to get I flew here yesterday if he has clear and he's going to place with clear. He'll be fine. I didn't have to show an ID

Oh good. I have clear and I had to show my passport At a place that had clear. Yeah, doesn't clear doesn't it do a retina scan? Yeah, I didn't know any me show anything They made me and my passport. We don't have the accuracy I don't have the accuracy, man. I can't chase it down. I don't think it's going to work. You know what it is? You probably got international enough that you did clear with your passport before. I don't think I ever did clear with my passport, so they had to just see it, upload it.

Ah, so now you should be good. Now I don't have to do it again. But his passport's expired. I believe the global entry card doubles if he has one, which being potentially... I do not have real ID. I need real public won this battle I Think they are expecting everyone to just get the real ID by this expiration date Which they pushed off for ten years, but so many people are arriving at the airport without it. They're just like fuck it

They're not in for you. Yeah, that's what I've heard that people are getting through I think also a lot of people have passports Yeah, what is the hoop you have to jump through get a real ID that you didn't have to jump through I had I used to have I went and it was like I just got one I brought my passport But yeah, I think you need like three four It was like I needed my social security card and my birth certificate and you gotta only have my passport Then if I had all three they would have given me the real I really okay and you can't mail renew it or like it states where you can only do that you have to go in I had to wake up at 630

because that's the earliest to schedule an appointment for that day that's the only way you can do it's like a lottery in the morning right you got a query I got it when we here. Like I think it's just like auto did it or something I don't know. Yeah, you might have like when we had to get an Illinois license. So Do you have a star on it? Yeah. Oh, okay. So you're good. Your wife was probably on top I didn't have it took a bunch of shit I'm holding out for the same like how I'll have a clump of parking tickets But I usually won't pay it because I'm hoping You know every now and then a city's like we forgive you

That's what I'm hoping. I'm not gonna get this and then a few months are gonna be like never mind We will a city does says we forgive you should check. I just did it for April to check your collection They have like a special magic month where they're like sign your cards and tickets in here. You don't got to pay him It's like magic forgiveness, but that's good for the city that doesn't need money Philly did it before Philly has like never mind guys, so I'm holding out that they're gonna be like forget it This is too. I feel like I feel like you got scammed No, this is like the toll booth scam that's been going around someone Don't we owe like billions of dollars? Yeah, yeah, no no it's crazy that they wouldn't we saw every parking. Was it a Saudi prince that's what yeah

Yeah, one of the worst deals of all time horrible deal daly sold all the parking meters to the Yeah, whatever it is yeah, so the public investment fund yeah, that's crazy It was like it was like cash in hand like billions of dollars, but the over the course of it They're gonna make like hundreds of billions. Yes Jesus bad bad deal. I again, but we've had this conversation. Why why like fuck it? Just don't just start keeping the money ourselves What are they gonna do bomb us? Yeah. Yeah, well bomb you back bitch. There it is How about now now where we at Kyle did you find out if mincy expensed his meal Oh cuz Kyle Venmo mincy for his half no

worries either way I'd be bad yeah I would be mad if he got a fight meal, and then you've paid for I think he's yeah But he was straight up with me. What do you say? He said I'm gonna expense. I'm gonna maybe try to expense this meal, and I was like that's a lot I'll just demo you for my half, okay? So he probably will Expense the total I think yeah, that's his money. Yeah, it's like a he deserves it. He helped us out. I owed him a service fee for doing it. Yeah, you're right. They catch you guys win last night. We did. I have an

announcement as well. We won. We slaughtered him. It was actually awesome. And the team we played was actually pretty good. So they were like, we slaughtered our last two teams. Like we just we just hit the ball where they weren't a bunch but the announcement is your boys still got it your boys still got it because we went out for beers after I said I was gonna go out for beers for at least one game and since we slaughtered the team I was like fuck it let's go out for beers I got hit on at the bar. What? Whoa! Imagine. Yeah, but by someone who's not a Barstool fan. Whoa.

Wow. I didn't even know who you were, I just liked it. Wow. Didn't know who I was. Was it y'all on the other team? How'd she do it? Yup. It was awesome.

Now, there's a little controversy in my household because my wife gets convinced that the person knew that I was like famous, but they're, how would they, why would they hit on me then? Well, how'd they oppose it? Like a Malisek napkin move? No, so we were sitting outside at Declan's in Old Town and the waiter came over and he was like,

hey, the woman in the window just bought you a shot and handed me a shot. I didn't take it. I gave it a max. And then as I was leaving, I went to say, I was like, oh, okay, so she's a stoolie. So as I was leaving I went to say thank you I was like, thank you so much for the shot. She's like, that's it I was like what else cuz I was expecting her to be like, can I get a picture and

I was like what else and she's like, aren't you gonna come in and buy me a drink? I was like, well, I gotta go home and she goes what's at home, and I go my wife and three kids And then it got awkward. I would have played a little ball with her. I'll have to check with my wife first. You would have played around with her? Just to feel it. The Sully sitting next to the table next to her was laughing his ass off because he's watching it all go down But yeah, dude that'll probably never happen again. I could have taken her down. Awesome. What a rush. So sick. Wow. Yeah. Was she an older lady? No she was well Never happen again. I could have taken

So sick Wow, yeah, was she an older lady? No, she was well, she was not older she was attractive Yeah sending shot also Not white Yeah, just puffed out Don't say that Compare her to another person that we all know Ummm Beyonce

Oh! A rebel! You for sure still got it I still got it Wait, Beyonce is in town this week. Oh my Was Beyonce at Declan's oh No way favorite spot she goes there every time. Okay. Yeah, she didn't know you yeah No, that's like and I then when I got home obviously I immediately told my wife was like

You boys still got it and like thank God. thank God I'm loyal and I'm here right now because it could have been on. Yeah, thank God, you're lucky I'm loyal. Yeah, you're lucky. But then she was just like, she definitely knew who you were. And I was like, but if she knew who I was, she wouldn't have bought me a shot and been like, come have a drink with me.

Honey, not white. Yeah, if she knew who I was, she wouldn't have been black. Babe, you're in denial. Was she with anyone who could have been maybe like oh that guy over there She was another woman, but I don't think oh Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, she's taking pictures of a bunch of stoolies Oh obvious you were a guy you were somebody take any pictures I the there was a table next to us and stools were sitting at that I handed them We also got a round of shots from my friend who owns Declan's I handed them a

My shot because I wasn't gonna take any shots and we were talking about bets and I gave him Jonathan coming at 20 points No big deal hit Yeah, that's pretty interesting though because I wouldn't like peg you as single right like you're older Right and also like if she was a stoolie she would know that like that's inappropriate. She took a risk right right, so that's why I think she didn't know She and the way she reacted when I said wife and three kids she was like oh, and I was like yeah She's disappointed or she mad was started to cry Wow no dude. She was like I've been drinking You must not know about me, and I'm gonna be I'm gonna be living off that yes. Yeah, I don't want to Burst your bubble. Oh god. That's a Brandon Walker specialty what black women love Brandon. Oh, yeah

That's true. It's I'm bored. I've seen it every time we go anywhere. Yeah, it's cornered. They love us They love his height. I think it's the height and the energy. I don't know it's I've never seen anything Well, you grew up in what percentage was your hometown in school 70% well the high school was 80't know, it's weird. I've never seen anything like it. Well, you grew up in, well, what percentage was your hometown in school? 70%, well, the high school was 80% black, the hometown's 65%. Oh, you have the muscle memory of interacting with that. There's comfort there, but I can't explain it. The only time I ever get hit on

is by older black women. That's pretty interesting. She was not older by the way. Well, mine are. Yours are about 40s, 50s. Yeah. Mine's are the Beyoncé's. Beyoncé is kind of older? The younger Beyoncé's.

OK. Brandon's got the Oprah's. They're what's it called? Jason Waterfall's Beyoncé's. Oh, Pink Panther Beyoncé's. The Austin Powers Beyoncé's. Correct. Oh, the Knowles's.

Correct. That hasn't happened though in a long ass time, so that felt good. So she just saw you. That's all she saw. She saw the cut of your jib. Now I should say that it could have been deceiving because I was sitting at the table of mutants, all of our teammates. It's very nice to be around.

Yeah. So it was like max memes, quigs, you know, like there was you know, I probably stood out in my black sweatpants Coming from a softball game But yeah Good for you. What was your stat line? Last night three for four you could know and someone comes off of three for two doubles No, I go station to station. They actually at one point I got in an argument with our third base coach I can't I think it might have been McCarthy because he tried to send me home and I said no I

Just ran from second to third and stopped beautiful day. Yeah, there was a weird Actually isn't awesome look at Max's stance by the way And he's a sumo wrestler look at him. Is that a meatball over there? Yeah people were very confused We don't play with gloves 16-inch Very fun game, but yeah, we got the whole team got their swagger back. Can someone do the GoPro on the head? I love that we could do that. I think we're playing the best team next week, so there's already been talks about forfeiting. Yeah smart Just we're tough guys. We run from confrontation. Yeah, don't do that. No, absolutely not play them But yeah, it was fun night. It's good night. Still got it. Oh, yeah, I would be riding

I would have floated home. I did. Yeah, I did And I walked in with us. I walked in like Vince McMahon My wife was like what? fully erect Ready to roll My wife was like what? Zah was peddling shots last night. Oh he was? Zah was killing it. Zah, what's the toast? He had a really good one To those that wish as well. Yeah that one. To those that wish as well no no To those that wish as well and those that don't can go fuck themselves, but it was a lot more animated last

I'm dead Towel was out. He was dabbing. Yeah, you were a hype man. Yeah, he was in the crowd. He had some ad-libs heckled mook He had some ad-libs. He heckled mook. Not funny. No, dad's out? No, no, no. He said he made a joke about there not being any black people in the crowd. And I made some noise.

If you stuck around me, there would be. Oh, yeah. I did. All right. All right, that's your new thing now. Oh, boy. Yeah. I'm going to try that on for size. I would kill to make that my personality. That's your new thing now

I would kill to make that my personality The shot I get some street creds are big time. Yeah big time The sisters usually don't it's usually the brothers that that venture that way the sisters are reluctant to do that so it's a big deal Have you guys seen the the black wife effect posts? Yeah, where it's like it's like a Nerdy white guy, and then he starts dating a black woman and over the months he progressively gets like super cool and handsome Yeah, taller like you have your trim. Yeah Yeah, it's like Serena Williams with Reddit guy. This is the funniest.

Like Napoleon Dynamite's brother with La Fonda. Oh yeah. Tip got cool. Come on now. Get the shit out of here. Not quite. Okay, little facial hair. You got a beard. Oh Got a beard yeah, oh

You know I hate him now. Yeah, you hate him. I don't like that guy That's not who he is. I wish you fell in love with It's not who he was clean them up He's already He's just a handsome guy Okay, oh He got hotter you got I see what happens Yeah, they get hotter that guy's different. He always had it. Yeah, he had it deep down this guy

Okay, so yeah, okay, it's the haircut hair guys guys Yep Okay, so yeah, okay, it's the haircut the haircut guys Yeah, hmm anyway, that's you know, okay The the 15 second exchange in a Irish pub effect I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it.

I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it.

I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it.

I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. I can't do it it. Oh really? Yeah. I can't say it's happened. I've never heard of it. Many or if ever. You've had dudes do it though. Oh yeah, dude. Yeah, I'd supply shots all day.

Yes. From afar. Dangerous. Yeah, I don't take shots that are bought. I made that rule in 2014, because I took a bunch of shots that were bought for me and then ended up in the middle of the street Like 10 a.m. How long ago?

2014 oh you just it was the it was the you was a joshi game We opened up Declan's at 6 a.m. To watch USA versus Russia, and I took probably like 12 shots before 10 a.m. And then just oh That was it. I couldn't do no more free shots woke up next to a.m. and then just that was it couldn't do no more free shots woke up next to a black woman yeah what the hell I get here um yes this conference yeah I'm super intimidated I walk around here and I've just felt very in the way yeah your own space it like yeah, the bathrooms are busy as hell Oh, yeah, I've had to shit all day. That won't do it me Won't I shouldn't hear cuz I was thinking about doing it in the women's bathroom

I was like, oh, there's actually a lot of women here. I was gonna come ask you for Tums Oh, tell me that bad really tough shit today. I got some times if you want throw them over here Well, not physically on me upstairs. where do you in your in your locker where no my I have my stuff some going to the airport after I say I say to the stress early this morning to stragglers were like roaming in the back here and I ended up giving them a tour and letting them sit at your desk oh really yeah I panic that's okay I was like you guys can do anything you want you take the turtle if you want it was classic Kate her new show is about starting like five minutes, and she felt bad, so she volunteered to give him a tour

Julie you're gonna miss a Plinko day. I know I'm sad about it. We got a so we got to figure out Let's just all bring good and bad, and then we'll do it again. Yeah, we did last last year bring your appetite any Fillings for t. Does he know that no, okay? Yes, I'm I should Tell titties. I'll talk some Danny's out, but tell me sitting in the regular chair So he doesn't have to do like a wheel yeah, actually know what have him do the wheel you'll do a regular one Jay Because Tate's good at the wheel okay. He's been very good at that Nick and KB. did you guys hear when they were doing the tour and they walked by your studio?

No I don't want to know. I was fine until they put the words anus on the wall. You put the words anus on your podcast. But it wasn't supposed to be a real podcast. put the words anus on your podcast. But it wasn't supposed to be a real podcast. We got four. This is a joke that's gone too far. It's gone too far. Yeah. Well, dude, he walks by with this big group and he's like,

this is another untold story. He's like, in meetings, we don't typically lead with the acronym. Yeah, we have to change the name of our show. Every time these are these happen, I'm so embarrassed. No, dude. Legendary. It's just very funny that you guys created a podcast being like, it's never going to be good.

Right. We really handicapped ourselves. We really hamstrung ourselves from the jump. But again- Don't worry, we will not have any success. Yep. We'll not be any success yes that's our pitch that's that's some real good ambition we got it what if the number one basketball recruit in high school cut his hand off I want it to be good

Yeah, I'm not like trying for it. I don't want it to be a failure or expected to be I know Okay, it's it's I know you want it to be good. It's very good. It's past that point right? It's very good But the name is funny. Yeah It does imply that you were like we'll never get advertisers that does yeah, but again We started it with just putting out clips of a show that didn't exist the new untold story That's the name of the show right yes, but I didn't even realize that what would you guys change the name, too? We've talked about it. I think you could we do we want I really was it a Why don't you guys change it? Out of feeler believe us this time, okay? Yeah

Intimidating it is intimidating Get it you guys can do it. We're on purpose. Yeah, yeah Yeah, we swear we're not fucking around that's very deadpan That's very good clearly likeable internet time there it is You do fun ass guys that would be awesome now our merch would go We've discussed it it might happen eventually I Fear that we're doing is the show being called anus makes it so good I agree there's like a like there's so many people are watching the yak right now They're like that's why I fucking love those in the yak makes no sense

Yeah, like we that was ron came up with the name. I think if they like us though. They want us to you know get Sponsors, but again. I fear what's gonna happen is what's happening right here You guys are gonna change the name to just another acronym this yeah I think back in the same time, but if you don't go by the acronym But we'll figure it out. I Think I think your fans like that. You're the bad boys for sure That's part of what I also part of the appeal is but like they're good enough those guys don't give a fuck It was it was fun. Maybe we were just starting fuck you

Let's do the ad reads bad and now it's like we have to keep jobs But you guys have built up enough rapport that like your fans are not going to be like we don't want to listen anymore Because you change the name I would take I would I would listen to some ideas if like the yeah Naming is the hardest is so hard. Yeah, oh No, sorry. I got a text message. What? What does it mark?

I think I might have... Baby time? I think. TJ, what you just sent? Oh, yeah. Oh, you didn't see this? Oh, wow. He's now asking for a ceasefire.

A ceasefire. He's the one that shot the first shot. This is crazy. I told him. I said you gotta try to win this game first. We have it. Oh my God. His video yesterday was he was a downtrodden guy in his car. If you scroll down. Congrats Hank. Congrats toley Presidente. This is a brand new Celtics team. Thibs will have an answer Friday night at the garden.

It's just a completely different Celtics team. And Thibs will have an answer, feel confident about that. In the meantime, congrats everybody. Congrats Sarah's Pizza on your on your high high rating That's great Appreciate all you do By the way, mr. Bing Bong will be back on Friday He's back

Yeah, he got ahead of himself ceasefire is crazy this is that I mean, it's I don't know has he ever done has mr Bing Bong ever Called for a ceasefire. The series hasn't even started. Well, he did retired after Jason Tatum got hurt for one one game but then he flip-flopped and unretired and Now it's like We've got a we've got two things working against the Knicks We've got mr Bing Bong trying to get trying to broker peace for the next round and chaise 222 that's right for mmm, which has to be in hit the back of his head che you are on the hook

I took accountability for it kind of What I did I literally tweeted out that it's my fault if the Knicks lose this series though Will you accept any and all blame? I'll have to think about it over the weekend. So you didn't take accountability. Do you think something supernatural could be at play in regards to that curse? Nick, you missed it yesterday. He did a gauntlet and I said you have to get under 215 Otherwise the next you're gonna lose this series and then he said how about 222 and he got to 2244

Oh, no, you missed a bunch of threes Yeah, and then of course in very Stephen Che fashion. He didn't take the easy right way out and say My gauntlet time has nothing to do with a professional basketball game He instead tried to wiggle like, oh, well, I actually got better time than you think in the spelling and the threes. That's not how that ever works. Yeah, he needed Kate out there, dude.

Yeah, true. You missed a lot of threes. I did. The time overall was still fine, but yes, it was a bad shooting game. Like you're a little worried. I'm not worried about the Knicks. Oh.

I think you can reverse it. We should do a gauntlet, right? You should go max out. You should do a gauntlet in front of the sales. Oh, that'd be amazing. You should do a gauntlet through them. Yeah. You run over four people, the Knicks will win this series.

Jack, you gotta. Chay, go max out, at least. Is the bench even assembled? Steve, if you crowd surf this sales conference the next one? Yeah, we should have Steve just lifting weights right now Get out there and start doing it before I actually I got it Steven I Think their next thing is at one o'clock, and I can get you

Some time yep, if you do little skittles for the and I can get you some time. Yep. If you do little skittles for this fire sale. Oh! Yes! It's reversed! It's reversed! Yes! You have to.

You have to. Yay! That's the curse. This is going to backfire. That joke will crush with this crowd. Okay, let's see it. I agree, I agree. They'll love it.

Let's try to sell it. I'm texting right now. Oh my God. Oh my god. Oh my god, I Think so. I don't know if I don't think this is like a bar stool only I think there are a lot of external companies here. Yeah, I don't know if they're gonna want Interference not really your concern. That's fine. They're in the middle of our office Yeah, but also this is probably I mean

Oh, there's a they probably enjoy their jobs, but a certain point you're at a conference like this Yeah drones on it gets a little race. You need a little spice you need a little Something they need a little something Also, they will welcome this Steve. We have regular skittles here We can get them. I believe there's littles above Kyle. We do need the regular Doesn't work without the regular check up there check check in that pocket right there There might be regular ones behind the littles. Okay, you're right. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go booked Oh my god, Jay. You just booked a show

This is I'm not gonna be a'm already I'm so excited to watch you I'm already like I need a Kate cam you have your props you got some Hey crush, Julio. Give him a pep talk don't do this dude. You got this chair. Yeah, this crowd will love it You got it. What your worries zero? He's fine. It's gonna crush Kate's way more worried about this and chase this makes me because I've been watching them I've been getting a vibe of the crowd and this is not the vibe. It's corporate crowd Oh, no, no, it's he's gonna crush Oh, but that's the kind of his joke is the kind of joke that will hit with these people

But they these people don't understand what this is are we opening up are we opening it we have to so we could hear oh Yeah, oh god. We got up at least put the mic out. So I think they're coming last night They're at lunch right now The show up at one o'clock. He said that's when they start back. Yes, that's fine Give me like 15 minutes. Well that makes sense. Do you want to do more longer than your ass? You got 23 minutes just end on the skittles joke No, not really you just want to skittles. Yeah, what if they're really feeling it I? About I don't have wait should we send Brandon out there to open?

Are these all Chicago people here like Mr.. Beast like right-hand man is here. I think they're across the table was out there giving a speech earlier There's like big deal people here. It's like a thing. Oh, this is great then Steve the head of like every major brand Oh, this could be what this do you not want your job? He's gonna have the stand-up community mad at him you stay I'll introduce you I think there's brass from a rival candy corporations There is No prayer gonna love they'll love the brand humor on their rivals All right, I like want to pass a note out there. That's like everybody. This is

What it's what you sit right there hold up the applause sign actually no Kate. Why don't you sit with people? I would die you want to you want to introduce them and yeah What come you should go out there and preface and just Yeah! You can plug in your show, you can plug in Come. You should go out there and preface and just be like, what you're about to see is XYZ. Oh, I hope he gets turned down. I could see where that black lady would look at Dan and be like, hey. Yeah, I'm not surprised by that.

He's got something about that. He's got a Riz to him. He cuts a good figure. Do you guys see the Rizzlers modeling pictures for that real, like, brand? No. I can't say I have. What brand? I did not. What's he modeling?

I put it in the group chat this morning, no big deal. No hard feelings. I saw it, Kate. Thank you. I don't. It was very funny. It wrapped up. What?

It's a street wear brand, I guess. He looks awesome. Yeah, he looks cool as hell, right? Your e-sport. Good job, Rizler One thing he can't do, you can't You just fucking can't Brandon?

Good for him He still got it Do the Knicks need the Rizler in the Garden for game 6? Wasn't he, was that where, that was Yeah The basketball shit was going with the Knicks, right? Yeah, yeah He played in a game with the Play game with the alumni add to the curse che was 44 seconds over number 44

1970 Lakers Jerry West hit a 60-footer against the Knicks and it were full go now That's pretty impressive Kate. Yeah, what are you gonna? Do are you gonna? Just go straight into little skittles? I told you you got to do a little crowd work little crowd Tonight crowd work Yeah, yeah, do you have any like brand-centric jokes, I'll introduce you Grant I don't understand what you're asking brand not grand-ric. You're like are like stupid like sales like jokes No, I can maybe do the tic-tac one like all right. Let's workshop a couple

Where I bet you guys didn't expect your big meeting to be in a basketball court I heard they're serial attenders of these events yeah Oh come on right. He's down Jay right you sound add stuff just go tap into that yeah I used to be an ads guy myself what are some hate when somebody sells an ad and then you I used to be with you people. Yeah, I used to be in sales, and I realized my life sucked You are happy and then say look at this fucking guy and just pointed a random I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,

I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,

I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,

I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, But there's a there's a portion of people who came to this that do not know Barsul because it's outside Like group that is we've allowed to host this here. Why does it say lunch and giant? They know Lunch this is great So yes, even you got it. You can't just I got a little skittles. I gotta do a little crowd work I got it. This is this is directly from my sense. Okay. All right I'm good. Oh, I got to need 10 or 15 ministers remember and this is sit you're gonna be saving the next season

True I need all the credit if you do this and they win game six and a blowout this oh my god We need Derek White to start making three pointers It'd be cool if just our star player didn't get called for four fouls in three minutes. Oh here we go You guys see Jim Brown grab Josh Archipenis last night. I did yeah, he actually We just hate PMT. I think he technically masturbated him Long enough that it was a masturbation He masturbated watch him watch this That's why oh

There was masturbation Somebody else does it it's not masturbation right well. No you can masturbate someone. Oh, it's a handjob. Yeah Oh, yeah, you got a job. I don't think oh you might have can't I think that was just a girth check That's up and down and he kind of with his fingers a little side fondled him. He turned it probably Yeah That would piss me off would it? Yes I love gonna do it to you grasp that

Yeah Grab my I would be I love to do it to you grasp that yeah Grab my grab my guy would be infuriated Yeah, his uh Josh Hart's wife. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know how I'd react. I grabbed your dick But it like somebody they know each other like imagine like your coat okay, that would piss me off more if like You grab my dick So pissed Yeah, yeah, just imagine that sensation. I feel like I have two fingers just clutching your penis I'll come clean. I think I think Dana and I have definitely done that before just grabbed it

Yeah, like just a quick I guess if you're both a part of it Yeah, but like I didn't solicit it turn the corner grab Kyle's dick No, yeah Dana And I've definitely done this and what's kind of fucked up to think about it like I don't think anything about him like grabbing my dick But if he ever and I've done this to him. He's done it to me if you ever cup Each other's breasts it we get in like legitimate fights people don't like that. Yeah, we get angry at each other hate that hate it Yeah, it's so disrespectful. It is but like are your breasts to the point where if you tanned you have white where it like you lift The test is can you hold a pencil under it? Is that what it is? Yeah. Well.

We have a big pencil. I don't like the thing. Can you hold a big pencil? There's no titties in here that can hold a big pencil. No, you don't got them. I mean I could do it like that, but I'd have to. Yeah, I think that's fine then. As long as you can't hold a pencil.

I prefer a dick grab over a titty twister Yeah, Oh t-twisters come the way you know titty twister sock dude a Dick grab probably doesn't hurt. No. It's like a cup. It's like a cup of it. It's not like a Yeah, you're not like milking, but even I got shaft squeeze it squeezed. It wouldn't hurt Maybe I'm being dramatic somebody surprised me with a dick. I will not today, but maybe this month Yep, and I want to see how I feel right after the razor blade. Okay, are there you have to grab it? Yeah, other cultures were grabbing the dick is customary There's cultures with everything. Yeah, it's the bar

Yeah Nationality my stuff father a culture Yeah, I guess gay like I guarantee they walk around grabbing dicks to them Oh, I mean, I don't grabbing a soft dick though. I do open-air fucking like at the bar I don't know. I've never been to a gay bar where they grab dicks che We're having a sales conversation, okay. Hey, Maggie. Skittles is here. Oh, Skittles is here! Oh my god! Yes!

Skittles is here? Not directly, somebody that works for the company that owns Skittles. Okay. Big time. Oh, are you nervous now, Steve? They'll love it. No. But, I mean, this is... Is it going to be allowed? I mean, the joke is me making fun of Skittle. No, it's not. It's you making fun of...

Wait, what really is? No, it's you making fun of advertising thoughts. Well, first of all, it's not really a joke. Yeah. Kate is hyperventilating. It's not really a joke. Maggie, is this okay? Yeah.

Okay, great. Yeah, it's not being live streamed over the court right now. No, but can we know who it is so we can have the camera on them? Yeah, Skittle cam. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Can we know who it is so we can have the camera on them? Yes, good. Okay? All right Maggie we allowed to are we allowed to listen into Steven set

Okay, yeah, I mean, it's he's our most PG comedian We don't need a lot of mics and again very quiet. Yeah comedian is is loose Okay, what are you? What would you say your odds your bomb chances are? I don't know. They definitely went up if skills in the crowd, but Che I'm gonna introduce you and set the stage though of like this is why you have to do this the the Joke do you do you agree with that? No, no Him like hired entertainment know I think I think I think I think I think my treat him like hired entertainment. I think yeah That's what I'll say like is a gift to you guys

We thought we gave you one of our best we actually have a guy that works here that used to work in ads Yeah, we let you speak. Yeah, don't even say it's gonna be comedy Yes, I will not say it's common yeah frame it as like a TED talk It's about to happen. Yeah, good call good call People love to just be surprised with I mean this was bound to happen when we hosted this things like yeah, just pretend They're not here. Okay On our live show that we do every day where we just where all the chairs are pointed Here staring at Show that we do every day where we just where all the chairs are pointed We're doing a regular yak with nothing going on if there's one person who walks by us that we don't know we stopped the whole Show now we have a 200 people

I already I just can't handle not disrupting this right, right? As well fly the chair it just people are being too normal out there is the lunch placard gonna say something else later It's you say Stephen Che dinner. Oh, can we get graphics be like Stephen Che? Guest comedian yeah, yeah, but I won't say he's a comedian at all like he used to work in sales Oh, you gotta introduce me is no no no Hey, I think I don't make it harder. It's much better to do the sales intro. I have a salesy intro Are you in my stuff? Do you have like crowd work? A little bit okay good. Uh I wouldn't actually call it crowd work, but I talked about the sales background stuff

Good. Uh, I wouldn't actually call it crowd work, but I talk about the sales background stuff. Some good fraternizing going on out there. Heinz Mustard is here. You can tell them they're gonna relish this. Yeah, you could. You could. I guess you could.

Okay. All right. Oh man. Unbelievable. Kate, do you want to know no, I think you act you should I don't want to put big cat wasn't in the room when we proposed this idea should Kate sit in the crowd You should promote come should Kate no Kate should hold the mic for Steve Weep I know people get annoyed by this but I have like a problem Like, anxiety problem. It's like a real thing. That's fine.

It's just that they don't understand. If you were to warn them, what would you say? Oh my God. How do you warn 200 people about Stephen Che? In like a minute or less. I guess you can't. Evacuate. I'm happy though, Stephen, that the Knicks are gonna be back on like this is your your free and clear of your jinx huge

Finals in 25 years well Let's let it happen first before he says that yeah do it's not dependent on my success No, no doing this does not guarantee the Knicks win It takes away the guarantee of a Knicks loss. Your burden is gone. Your burden is wiped clear You still got to go win the series. That's got to be pretty freeing though I said I got all the credit when they win you can get the credit when they win But it's I'm saying I'm not guaranteeing a win. I'm guarantee the loss if the if you didn't get the yak time

We're just absolving you right fine. Yeah, you will I'm sure there will be people who give you credit and be like, Hey, it all turned on little skittles. Fair. This whole thing is ridiculous. They're still taking it. There are people out there that don't know. But you know what? What's coming? Can we can we just say something that we all know is a possibility Even Shay, I think it's he's gonna be the fucking highlight of the whole day. You're sponsored by skittles Yeah, they're gonna. They're gonna be like holy shit that guy we got to invest millions in them It's that's how it works for him. We've never heard someone try to do a julio won't have to give him a pep talk about doing it the right

to do a little skit. Julio won't have to give him a pep talk about doing it the right way. Julio will be opening for Stephen Che. Julio will be begging Stephen Che to let him open. Please. Let me just get 10 minutes on the Little Skittles world tour. I'm all scared of him and just trying to be like, whatever you need, dude.

The idea that Stephen becomes like a wildly successful comedian and Little Skittles is like Bert Kreischer machine I would happily open for Steven Chay's world tour You guys forget I crushed last year I Don't forget. No, I think it's a good joke. Yeah Confident yeah, I don't remember the joke damn good bit I Had a set and Kyle somebody said it was very good. I forget it. Oh, yeah We had was your wife was it Bader? I think Bader right or number one

Yeah over Brandon Walker and other notable people and he later texted me and said and apologized and said he was just kidding Who's to say? Just what Bader said I doubt it President said he was just kidding. Who's to say? No. Just what Bader said. I doubt it. Don't be mad. I was just gonna show you, but then I realized I'm lying. Where's he gonna stand? Right in front.

Oh, lunch is over. Right where the barstool is. Yeah, lunch is gone. There he is. Lunch is gone. So are we allowed to? Video show this on video. We're just gonna hear the audio of me doing this No, you can show we'll just show it from this angle. Just show you yeah this angle

Do we have the loudspeaker? I think there's a mic now on what's the microphone for our show though? Yeah, I think I think Steph put one out there We're gonna pick up the gym audio Yeah Let's hope they don't laugh too hard I think Steph put one out there. We're gonna pick up the gym audio. Yeah. Let's hope they don't laugh too hard because it might fucking blow up. Especially if there's... That'd be a problem.

This might just shut the show down. Chay, do you think there's a chance you get heckled? I mean, if you guys are out there probably. We're not gonna be out there. We're staying in here Well as long as I isn't on the floor no heck yeah We got time to get saw drunk in the next ten minutes. Yes We're just waiting for you to come back yeah, anything What's what's keep the name change the name anus

It's pretty it's hit a point though anus where like when I say it I don't even think anus doesn't mean but hold it doesn't mean but hold of me anymore you guys kind of ruin I ruin but whole yeah, because sometimes I want to use anus cuz it's a guys kind of ruin it. I ruin butthole. Yeah, because sometimes I want to use anus because it's a big word. And I can't I feel like it's safe enough though. If you were to say like, Oh, yeah, I'm gonna go take the picture and then my intro. Steve. Oh, it'd be great. hole is a good name of a show. holes good. It's not has other meanings. You know, NHL

playoffs are here and the only place to buy hard to get playoff tickets is game time the official ticketing partner of Barstool Sports. With killer last minute deals, all in prices, views from your seat and their lowest price guarantee game time takes the guesswork out of buying NHL playoff tickets. Prices on the app actually go down closer to, it gets to buck drop so you can save up to 60% when buying last minute tickets. PFT was looking at tickets for Panthers Capitals, Saw an amazing deal for great seats, only $96. What are you waiting for?

Go buy those Caps Games tickets now and really any playoff for NHL or NBA or pretty much any sporting event. Take the guesswork out of buying NHL playoff tickets with Game Time. Download the Game Time app, create an account, use code YAC for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply again, create an account,

redeem code YAC, Y-A-K for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply again, create an account, redeem code YAK, Y-A-K for $20 off. Download the game time app today. What time is it? Game time. All right? All right. So Big Cat's gonna go, you think he's gonna warm up the crowd at all

and let him know what's coming or you just gonna go straight with an intro? Ladies and gentlemen, Stephen Che. I think he's gonna say preface that like he used to be in sales. Yeah. I'm not gonna say he's a comedian. You're telling the truth. I'm gonna say, token of our appreciation for supporting Barstool, I wanted to bring up

a very special guest speaker who used to be in sales. Ladies and gentlemen. Perfect. And you might find his story a little motivating. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Perfect.

He's going to come up on stage and share his story. Yeah, his experience. Yeah. He's like, I'm only doing this to reverse the jinx I put on the nexus. Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, little Skittles. You got both Skittles?

You have both Skittles? The littles are not part of the joke. He just explained that to me. Oh! He only needs the big ones. Oh, the regular size ones. So, Steve, last time you did it, you went with purple skittle and the background was dark You couldn't quite see it to go on screen nice Then I go up and I do 90 seconds two minutes

Wow, that's very for this Crowdsurf oh that wouldn't be bad crowds that surf still yes still possibility I would love to do that our people I would love to crowd serve for the sales conference. His body language didn't say that's what he was about to say. I've never done that before. I feel like people dressed up in nice clothes aren't up for doing that for a 200 pounder. There's a chance.

Well, if you jump, they have to catch you. They'll be laughing so hard and on their feet clapping. That might just happen now. OK, you might just be asking so hard yeah on their feet clapping this might just happen Hey, okay, I just be asking for it dive right in have any of you ever crowd surfed no Yeah, kind of and I hurt myself no that's I had someone dropped on me, and it really hurt. I think I like Sometime every now and then I'll think of mincy crowd surfing dick down Grabbing his face Pay attention. Sometimes, every now and then I'll think of Mincy crowdsurfing dick down. And it's just. Oh. He got his dick. Grabbed.

Just hands grabbing his face. Yeah. Chay, are you prepared for an encore? Oh. No, I mean I'll do my thing. You're gonna have a fireplace in the lake. That's part of this, yeah. Oh.

Oh, shit. All right, no more spoilers. Yes, yes. Oh my God. How are you gonna exit? Maybe down the middle aisle? Yeah, here comes mincy crowd surfing down You can't not grab his penis

So awkward. So awkward. He's giving high fives. Oh, he hit a vape. Oh, he hit a vape. Oh, there you go. They flipped him right side. Flipped him over.

It's like a baby. Have to be flipped. Oh. Where have I seen these two together before? I always forget he was there. little funnier yeah really does and he didn't say the slide out of frame he refers Collins worth I have a guest guest for I mean a gift for Nick awaiting except. Oh my goodness. I'll accept the gift Thank you from a viewer. I was handed it in an envelope. Thank you so

Antoine yeah, thank you because I've talked about my fear of anthrax exposure therapy. Maybe this looks like anthrax Thank you so much viewer. Oh, it looks like I took it out of the envelope to not see the it looks delicious What's it say? We're not eating this holy fucking shit TJ I think Nick is gonna want to eat this card. Oh Give it to him if on the yak if possible 10x Mike. Thank you Mike. What is it? It's fucking shinlim possible 10x Mike. Thank you Mike. What is it? It's fucking shinlim. Oh I'm not eating shinlim. I'm grading this look at him. I fucking love shinlim

You hip to this julio now. Oh, he's the master. Did you actually go to the show? No, I was supposed to go I didn't stay there that night. My wife went last year and she said sucked. No, she didn't Talk My wife went last year and she said it sucked. No she didn't. You shouldn't like Shin-Lei. You're trying to hurt me. He doesn't talk. That's a thing. He- English- Yeah. Doesn't need- But a magician should talk. No, he's very mysterious.

He needs a pen to his teller. Oh, I thought you meant to like write what you said. He needs both pen and teller. Which one doesn't talk? Mimes? Uh, teller. Teller doesn't talk. Teller doesn't talk.

Which is- Penjolet's a big one. Yeah. Big lunch yeah because I go time okay it's go to yeah secretive eyes thank you so much Mike I think the teller would be the one talking but he's not confusing he's not telling pretty fucking funny here we go boy they don't know what's coming. It's like the CEO of Nintendo America, being named Doug Bowser. Doug Bowser. That's right. I want to vomit.

You're going to be able to hear it? This is amazing. Che is very confident. I've got the vibe. These people do not know. Steven has the shot, son. I'm not going to get this. Just got to get everybody calmed down, it's a rowdy crowd.

We want to, we're really appreciative for everyone to be here today. So as a token of our appreciation, I wanted to bring up one of our guys who used to work in sales, so he can relate to you guys. He wanted to kind of tell his life story and what he's learned in sales and he's a great speaker so please give it up for Stephen Shae Oh God, it's so real

Oh shit Jack, grab me up here Thank you all you guys for showing up today My name is Stephen Shae I've been at Barcell for almost nine years I used to work in operations Thank you all you guys for showing up today. My name is Steven Shea. I've been at Barstow almost nine years. I used to work in operations. I did that for the first five or so years I was here.

It took a lot of years. The clock comes up to take a lot of meetings. I'm a good one. I take a lot of games. I'm a drag queen right now. I sell my games down here until five o'clock. All meetings. But I have a lot of games to get it right now. I saw the calendar, go until five o'clock, all news. But I have a lot of bad ideas in my day. Ooh, some really bad ones.

Well, I would have loved to be a fly on the wall for 1969. American Jews is a dick tack. Crushed a couple years, peppermint, breath mint, beef. The crush that for a couple years, a few years later, they introduce the orange Tic Tac. Now I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall for that. Somebody stands up, top floor, Tic Tac HQ, and they say, I know a question with Devin, but what about orange? Orange?

Nothing! It's not a joke So fresh that smells like an orange is about as useful as having a fireplace in a lake. I'm so tired. Speaking of products, I hear Skittles Room Mars is in the building. Oh my god. I want to shout out to you guys. I love Skittles and I buy a handful. But I would have loved to have been and been meeting Skittles, and I might have a handful. But I would have loved to have been in meeting Skittles.

Maybe someone on the top floor of Mars, HD, maybe. And somebody stands up and says, you know what? I think the Skittle is too big. There's a new product called Skittles Riddles now. Climb upicle Skittles Littles it out. Climb up for Skittles Littles. My mom's on paper. I want to thank you guys for being great audience. I'm going to do whatever it takes.

Thank you everyone for watching. Thank you. Oh! Oh no! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh, my God. I need to run out there and tell them. Steven Chazer. I bombed. I bombed so bad. Oh, you bombed so bad.

Oh, my God. I had it all written and I botched both jokes Nine months ago You're the most unafraid person in the world. Oh, I mean, I don't really care. It's insane. I thought it was. Oh my god. If I'm being honest, and I've done, you know, I did stand up once for you guys. I did it once like 12 years ago, and I did it

at the laugh factor now today. Pretty cool experience to just suck. Oh my god. Because I know it's over 90 seconds. I'm never going to see most of this people. I've heard more laughs at church. Oh, that was so good Did I do a good job of ensuring you What's up? Did I do a good job of ensuring you? I don't think that you're fine

That was fine. It was the what was the oh fuck moment for you when I messed up the tick-tock punchline, I was like, oh shit Should you go back there? Hold on one sec. I meant to say No, I mean I said it. I just said it all out of order and time. The Knicks are going to dominate Huge for the Knicks and see, you're just unfazed. Oh yeah, no I'm fine. Oh my god, I love Steve. That was unbelievable.

Fuck. That was your best work. Well done dude. Unbelievable. Kate, you good? You are like a different kind of human being. Like you are different. I like smell like stress sweat right now. Oh No, that was fun Fun there's a part that was cool about bombing like it was yeah like the

Emotionally unique that's an experience like I don't know what how many people are out there 80 a hundred maybe a lot Yeah, I mean that's a that's an experience that you don't get that often So you should have ended saying well looks like I'm going back to sales Hey, you talked to more people than that every single day You don't see them pretty big difference. Yeah. Yeah, yeah fair It got quieter than quiet it did sound pretty quiet, but it was kind of muffled from here. Did you hear any laughs from the front, maybe?

Very few. They're low. You'd only hear his heartbeat. It was a tough crowd, because when I asked, if people took a lot of meetings, almost nobody clapped. I don't think this was a stand-up crowd, which is fair. That's how we know. Did anybody look out at the people? I, yeah. Every time they gl I yeah every time it was like the head tilts people

He just got balls bigger than anyone yeah I admire it What what what he's told a story oh yeah, no you didn't you know sports hernia I mean Yes, but it bronze on the first looked like a third desk. Oh, yeah, but that's not a third No, no listen. Let him have it. Yeah, you had three There's a guy in the front row that pulled his phone out while Jay was doing stat let this guy in the yellow Phone out and just look at anything else honey. Come pick me up tuned out in the front row

I love I love your attire, too So I'm really prepared to speak in front of a larger group. How did you mess up the punch line? It's more about I already said orange earlier, so that's kind of the punchline Orange and then the skittles I'm supposed to say skittles little and then show the tic-tac and I went out of work or show the skittle went out You're all over. Oh, yeah, you started with you just started with a regular skittle Yes prop comedy I Prop comedy That's okay, that's okay. I loved it. Yeah, you got that Alex honnold. That's his name. Yeah

Right when they said his like brain just isn't scared. Yeah, that's part of what makes him. Yeah I like that documentary when I think his girlfriend was pregnant and she was like Can you not do this like we're about to have a baby like Jay's wife being like, hey, can you think of the kids? No, I got to I got to do little skittles the skills are calling I must go The Skittles are calling, I must go. That was amazing. Didn't get... Skittles rep is probably all the way down in their seat. Oh yeah.

I would love... But again, this is gonna end up in a deal. Like, Che's gonna get a deal. Something big is gonna happen, because that's just how he does it. He always wins. I hope it's exclusively little Skittles, not the regular Skittles.

I would love for him to be in a commercial. I would love to get the Skittles person in here and here You think we got a shot for a commercial Super Bowl commercial Very good. Yeah, I think they screwed up the the timing of it in the in a couple of the shows So it was I think people watched it at like 300 times. That's always a good way to introduce a new commercial, but did come out Well, yeah Shout out Steve snapchat Steve Steve. Oh, yeah, he's the director Did a great job. Oh

Yeah Synthetic food dies Unnatural flavors are they in you that's the other guys that's my hand no way Hank refused to get his hand so I did it that was a good damn good it was actually very uncomfortable to tape because they do they have like a fake a Fake sweat thing they can put on you. It's like a gel and it just itches so bad Stand there yeah Fake sweat

Hollywood now that is the magic Hollywood spray bottle spraying everyone Chair you can open up for me anytime you want, dude, until the tables turn and I then open for you. Thank you. Thank you. It's huge. All right. Have them open for you in Boston. Yeah, six, 12 Boston by tickets. Please not Julio.com. Oh, no, no, no. I prematurely Bing Bonged Club Trillian

Premature Bing Bonging stems from a combination of psychological physical and lifestyle factors including anxiety depression stress and relationship problems Asking for a temporary. Oh my god. Oh, so he's going through it. Did I kill mr. Bing Bong? Wait he then he Bing Bonged you again. Oh he did he just oh yeah Yeah, he was a fencer at NYU That's crazy. He's a collegiate athlete Wow, yeah Our Miller light rep is here who I'm close with and he just texted me he watched that he was like did Stephen Che lose a bad or something Yeah, I might have confused a little when I said you were gonna tell me your story

That was it was perfect after wondering how I got was perfect. After wondering how I got here. Everything was perfect. Stephen, you're the best. You're the best. There's no one like you. Now you want to run a gauntlet? What do you got on the other today, Stephen? I think good. Do you own any binders that you actually use in adult I Just bought some baseball card binders. Oh, yeah

For mine and my son's collection that's growing is yeah who has the better collection Well, it's all there's all the same I buy them for him. He sticks them on a shelf I go through them and pick out the good ones and save them for him Steven How many things besides pants you use with a zipper? and save them for him. Steven, how many things besides pants you use with a zipper? Backpack. That's a hard question. Yeah, suitcase. Coat.

Backpack has, like, snaps. It's a thinker. Oh, yeah, suitcase. Suitcase. A lot of backpacks have zippers. Jacket, coat. Yeah. Pillow.

Oh, pillow. Pillow? Yeah, like, underneath the cover of the pillow, sometimes. Some could, yeah. Oh. The hummus versus other dips is, I think every other dip is better than hummus, but I have hummus the most.

I think the health thing. Oh, we critically underrate dips as a society. I think dips are the best. That's my restaurant idea. The dips. It's just dips and drinks. Yeah, I think dips are incredible. Rotating cast of hot dips.

I don't mind hummus, but I really have to be in them Maybe once a year it needs olive oil really it's too dry without a little olive oil Dry day like a pool of olive oil the top of the hummus. Yes, I feel like Without arguing it collaborates you we can do this. I mean case. Oh goes to the top Let's just know let's start with the S tier case I'm gonna start with comment. Let's just know let's start with the S tier case. Oh, yeah, I need you to walk is us Buffalo chicken dip in case or s tier

Okay, so it is okay, so is this walk is there's a couple of hot cheeses queso and beer cheese So and guac What is there is the best Party it goes so fast walk not be a walk is better than I ever I think we're Under value all right. I'm gonna be I'm gonna get southern pimento cheese got to go very high and you guys Don't ask you guys. Don't eat it walk is not s Gwak is that there's never been a bigger boat on is a guac how can walk could not be a rarely done, right? A lot of bad walk walk is the best how about just? Is better than guac.

Salsa is better than guac. No, no, no, no. No! No! Why do you, they gave you salsa free. Salsa is not on the same tier as Buffalo Picket. Time out, time out, time out, time out. They gave you salsa for free.

Salsa, tomato water. Tomato water. Salsa's just fine. Sales conference, time out. Okay, all right, all right. They all just looked at us. All right, OK. OK.

They just heard us screaming about steps. All right. OK, so we've got to scream quietly from now on? I think we've got to just go from an 11. We've got to go down to an 8. I just cannot put salsa at ST. I like salsa more than guac. Salsa's an A.

I like salsa A giant bowl of guac a giant bowl of salsa. I think there's spicy salsa There's pico de gallo and there's salsa verde pico de gallo is any good. It's just like something pico de gallo is trash Scale what is a mid-tier? What is a B or C? Hummus is mid-tier, isn't it? Hummus is the perfect C. I don't eat seafood, but I think crab dip is high for a lot of people. I love crab dip.

Again, I have to sum up for pimento and cheese. Spinach artichoke dip I think is S. Pimento's A. Dill dip's gotta be low. Dill is C. Dill dip is C, yes. I think dill dips gotta be low Dill dip is C. Yes, I agree with that. Salsa Vangay is... Oh taco dips gotta be A or B. Wait, what did you just throw?

I think hummus is C. Hummus is D. I need definitive. I eat a lot, but it's C. They have varieties. Alright, taco dip has to be A or B. I think it's B. Taco, yeah, that's fine.

B. Alright, let's stop and rationally look and B. I think it's B taco. Yeah, that's fine All right Let's stop Rationally look and see what dips are on here that nobody eats because what is season salad we go in order and then if there's An appeal we can make an idea like pickled dip what the fuck garlic herb dip what the fuck right brownie dip I it's just that's a different Fruit dip is that just yogurt. I love I used to eat that time. I got sick no brownie dip kit Fruit dip is like the sugary like whipped cream thing They put it like root dips low where you want to put okay?

Order and if we appeal we appeal yeah, yeah somewhere right there Okay, pick a day is that chili dip oh fuck spinach artichoke dips I spent a charge trip to bethany yes, okay I'm gonna say fruit dip is actually a see if you're at like a communion party, and it's pretty bland And that's the only good thing you'll eat the whole thing I'm like yeah, but you're not I'm fine with that. What's pickel dip? All right mark was uh Do what the fuck is pizza dip TJ's in the business for himself? What is pickled it?

We don't know just don't stop dragging it around Spicy salsa to see no Spicy salsa's a C. No. Yes. Oh shit. No! It's a C. It's a fine.

It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. No TJ. TJ it's a C. The reason they give away for free is you can't go to a Mexican restaurant without having it.

You gotta have it. It's free. It's ubiquitous. What do they give away for free that's good? It's ubiquitous. Nothing is good that's free. It's, it's, it's the, no it's, like. It doesn't make any sense.

It's not always free. Gibson salsa is a mainstay. Julio, pick one. I so I put salsa higher because if you go to like a good spot They'll bring you you pay for the salsa. Oh you're taking his pick and moving it? Yeah, I move the salsa up to A. A. Put it with tap water.

Spicy salsa A. Tap water as well. But it's often free unlike any of these other ones. Yeah. I think a lot of times you end up suffering through it because it's the only thing put in front of you for a while, and you're like fuck. I guess I'll eat it I'm gonna eat the sauce until the guac arrives. I order guac I do that over there making it when they get done with the guac I have the salsa get it off my table, but if they have queso and guac you're getting

Glock is scientifically better Throw science in you can't bring it it goes bad so quick it gets all right, okay? What's yours? Okay? It's so good. I don't even think you like it that much real you guys Fucking guys cowboy caviar is just not a dip by the way. I don't know what that is. Okay. It's like a it's like a Kohl's law everything chopped up. Yeah avocados beans corn onions It's a salad. How you're up garlic and herb dip and garlic herb dip. Okay, I'm I'm different

I'm already gonna reluctantly put this higher than it should be but seasoned sour cream at what is that F with a crinkle chip? I'm fine with that. Bear. I don't like it with a crinkle chip. Maybe mix it in with some other shit but not standalone dip. I'm gonna move guac to B. It's unreal. Thank you Big Cat. Yeah well done. There it is. I'm taking spinach and artichoke dip and I'm taking it straight to where it ought to be. I'm taking spinach and artichoke dip and I'm taking it straight to where it ought to be I'm taking it to the eight here That might be the best one yet, and we're just gonna allow that It's a fucking

It's like warm and delicious I have it above walk and you and you feel healthy your your odds What is there a guac rep out there? You're trying to get? Sponsored by big guac. I feel you guys live a deprived life. You've never had good guac. I've had good guac real I've had good guac You leave you leave guac out for seven minutes, and it's fucking poop Nick real. Yeah, I'm looking at these down fucking poop Nick real yeah I'm looking at these down good ah beer dip is pretty good too that's the beer cheese for pretzels I think beer dip should be be all right all right where it should be next to guac I miss the first part we can move it around you if you'd like, but don't do it Danny

I'm putting guac back at a yes Stop doing what you're doing to TJ. I see you. Yeah, you know I see you do I get a pic Yeah, I don't I don't trust you in this I mean pimento cheese shouldn't be a it's very good I agree. Oh, yeah Put it at B and I would put crab dip in a but that's two moves All right, but also that's a that's a cheese heavy tier right there. Yeah, that's okay heavy list I guess well cheese is the best dip. Yeah cheese I don't think queso is two tiers above like beer cheese and pimento should I be so be a so

above like beer cheese and pimento should I so be a so gotta be at the top now we're talking crazy Kyle Steven go ahead you're the you're the person who got us in this mess do it Steve TJ Fuck it guac Yeah, it's gonna be we all agreed that I get so much everything's on the board it's final I think walk and Buffalo chicken dip and case. I think that is a good tier. I think spinach artichoke is very close Well, it's gonna move so just don't even walk walk it s to Kate We got to get all of them on the board you guys are just having store-bought. I have a new one to add to the Unless you've had it. It's you guys might not know what this is but a hot Mexican street dip with yes, he's in stuff and it's some mayonnaise in there. Yes, that's I'm gonna say it's a B

It's actually like crazy. I can live like that like that like that fair enough fair enough What pizza dip I Can imagine it I feel like that's that's just doing too much yeah, I feel like I'd say the sea it's like it's definitely good, but it's like you're probably you're eating You're just a white honest get pizza. Well. You know what's better than pizza dip pizza pizza Yeah, so you know, it's it's good. So we'll give it a C but yeah Okay. All right. I'm taking fruit dip and moving it to F. Yeah Something good and making it worse. No, you're not making it better. Yes Maybe like a point of fruit dip. Maybe a honeydew

Okay, okay fruit dip maybe a honeydew okay okay spicy salsa isn't two tiers above pico de gallo pico de gallo might be better it's better tell them educate them they don't know I like pico pico's better than it's what you like put on top of your maybe I don't like such salsa like that Right it's a garnish not a dip. Oh fuck you That was Obama liquor rage yeah, yeah, oh yeah, TJ. I'm with you crab dip to a Boy, that's a high fucking crap walk back down to be yeah Be you can't be I don't know if it can you move to two tiers Yeah, I can and I'm moving spicy salsa today. Yeah, baby. Oh, no wait. Oh right there. We just fucking

So this is a lot of people are gonna think this is a cowardly move, but I have to do what's right Move pico to the top of sea I like that so your tears tears I'd like to get these garlic herbs up there. What the fuck Can we just throw cowboy caviar never had it cuz yeah, I have Itos it's great I Think I'm gonna put a salsa verde D Okay, all right fair fair. It is just like the worst

Salsas good for a drizzle. It's great for on a burrito. Yeah, it's like good, but it's they always give you so much It's free. Yeah, what's the green stuff you put with the steaks the steak? Okay, that's different. Okay good Cuz that shit's good. Yeah, you ever have you ever have your ass for that in that way I just said I get some of that stuff That goo sir, I'm gonna need that green stuff my steak alright TJ I Sir, I'm going to need that green stuff on my steak. All right, TJ. A lot of people are freaking out about the pimento cheese pick, Brandon. People are defending you.

I've had it. I like it. None of you are Southern. If we were in the South, it'd be S tier. If there was all of these cheese dips next to it, I would want the hot melty cheese dips over the pimento cheese, which is so can be great I think it's great. I do like I'm gonna I'm gonna I'll get one of these out of here I'll put a chili dip at see I'm not yeah, I think we're against that's another one

It's actually perfect next to pizza. It's like what's better than chili dip chili. Yeah, I think we should treat this like chess You can only move an appealed one level But that's it TJ or che or me I let chase up If we're just doing that on him of guac ahead of spicy salsa He just made this can move it to s Steve it's still your turn no we're just like Never mind. Yeah, you can move it No, no, you know you said I like his rules. He just made a rule. I like his that started next round Set the rules

Marks will he was good. I Need guac as high as it can be I can live with it in it Let's do cowboy caviar as a see it's like yeah, I'm glad it's here. I'm not going crazy. That's high I think it might be better. We got it. We got a good guac s I've never been more invested Whatever you want Walks about the face We got a hold hold

We gotta hold hold In the spirit of clearing the bank I think that like pesto dip is like that's something I eat when no one's around Because it should be just put on pasta not yes, yeah agree. I think that belongs in F elite on pasta alright, okay? Salsa Is a table prop. You're just stuck on salsa. Why do you think it's offered for free? Okay. Because it's cheap and lousy. But it's not bad.

Move it down one. Alright, I'm gonna move Guac down to A. Shit. I'm gonna move guac down to a I'll be moving Come on walk down to be yep, Nick. I'll be moving walk down to see I'll be moving guac up to be By all means we're in a guac off. TJ? Hmm. I'm trying to figure out where my allegiances even lie on this.

I feel like guac is a... You can't be in the middle. I feel like it's a B, but... Don't. If I move, what direction can I move it that it'll end up around a B? I'm gonna move it down to C. I'm gonna move it down to C. That's really clever cover okay, okay. I want it to be a big. I love you guys you're fucking idiots Put walk in front of a cheese

You move to the top oh wow okay? Kate go back to the garlic and herb dip. I'm gonna get out of the guac Kate? Go back to the garlic and herb dip. I'm going to get out of the guac. Garlic and herb dip is an F. It's like I'm only eating it if there's only vegetables as the option. Okay, we might be in trouble. So now we're out of new dips.

So maybe one more round of... He's got it. We're in big trouble. One round of alterations. We're out of new dips. All right, so then no, you got to put the last dip up there then. It's another garlic and herb. How is it ranch on there?

Oh, then just put it next to the F? So one last round so you will end with Steven Oh Fuck no, you're done. You're good. Okay Titus mark. It's gonna be guac in the S tier Well, sorry, buddy. You're gonna need Julio to somehow Work with you here. No Work with you here. No We're moving guac back to be broke out the wink Sorry tennis, all the whole fucking world.

Everything there's to see. You can't see what's right in front of your fucking face. You know? That's the crazy thing. The problem is I don't know. Like, sound and stuff. No, it's fine. Guac should stay at B, but I don't know if,

but Danny has moved Guac before. We gotta preemptively. Move it one, cause it should land at B. Yeah. Danny get so what kind of Europe yeah that's my issue like I think walk is in a if it lands at B I'll be pissed but if it ends up at C I will never be able to experience unity with you guys I don't have any. I don't want it at a I have no desire to move. Gwak to sign. I have a great fear it'll end up at C and that would ruin everything. I won't touch. I have no desire to be who can promise they won't touch Gwak to get it to see. I just want to keep. I don't think walk deserves see. I want to keep it. I walk

is be. Yeah. I fear. Walk to see. Right. because I knew it was gonna get brought back Yeah, yeah, we had to play defense. I had to trust you guys. I guess but Danny it ends up at sea So I wanted a we have to take it to see to make sure yes I want to be fair to the other end up to see I think pimento is a little bit higher Okay, so put pimento a day And then why don't you go ahead while your fingers right there take guac to C Ready you have to bring it down one more Well, I don't know cuz I don't know what I went he went he put pimento at A I don't think Steven thinks guac is deserving of a C or D

Our brand and likeness will be tied to this final product This makes tier listing really fun. I don't I yeah, I think guac should end up to move it up one no I move walk. Yeah, you should have oh I'm scared Danny's gonna take it to a if I take it to be for you right. I'm scared pretending. I'm not here Just leave it leave it alone leave gu walk and let let it go. It's Walk is not my responsibility Kyle. I agree It's over. So what do you got? Let me see? Let me see what I got. It's gonna be turned out We got a you don't be a puppet Brandon. I don't know how go with your heart

I'm going I'm not going to business. This is gonna be a parody list If guac is at sea Parity list which is probably better for our brand if people think it's a power would it go a long way if I moved it To be myself with you personally no cuz then it's gonna get moved up to s don't fall for this Well, it can't get moved up to s can it it? Yes. We only have one guac guy. We have Booth. Brandon, Kyle's right. If it ends up a C, we're fucked.

But if it ends up a S, we're fucked. We're fucked. Okay, all right, let me see it one more time. Brandon, fuck. Brandon, don't let them play you like that. Don't touch it, Brandon. Just don't touch it. Don't touch it.

Just do not touch it. Happy with where a lot of things are. I think you might have to bring it down. I can't, I'm not touch it. I'm happy with where a lot of things are. I think you might have to bring it down. I'm not touching it. I trust... It's out of my hands. Spicy salsa goes to A. Yes. This is a great detente.

Salsa is three tiers ahead of guacamole. This is something else. The thing you pay extra for is three teal. Fix it. Kyle, fix it. They bring you salsa with tap water. And then they take your order. They say here's your salsa and tap water now you want to look over the menu. Yes, all right Nick. It's the six juice

Nick you have a right you have a chance to right all the wrongs right spinach artichoke to ask Danny bring it up Danny bring it up bring it up Like to be right now. Thank you Danny Danny need to justice So I think locks me big right so I think that's why you have to bring it down and no no what's change my goal is to get a read on change a at the fucking guac off and I'm moving you have to move salsa down I think I know we can't have salsa above guac I can't have Hmm. I could go into business for myself. Yeah, do it. Well, then I would move crab dip to It's so good Unbelievable, I'm moving pizza dip down to D

Steven this is all up to you This list is perfect right now. It is Do what people think I'm gonna do or should I just put my cheese to the fucking Earth's crust? Should I do it? Should I do it? Should I do it? Should I do it? Should I do it? Should I do it? Should I do it? Should I do it?

Should I do it? Should I do it? Should I do it? Should I do it? Should I do it? Should I do it? I feel like guacamole has been the arguments been spoken for There ain't no way it's better than pimento cheese pimento cheese down behind guac Your words didn't make sense there. Oh Okay, he thought he did bro thought he did something this is perfect. Oh, it's such a good

Dip is way out of its way grass The problem you did this Is a little silly I ate here you did this eight years are silly tear a pimento cheese should be a tear and now salsa I would agree guys got out of Atlanta about a bee I think salsa's up be Kyle and I were ranking rationally you guys got emotions involved you're the one that led the spiral you turn the fire you guys were even the whole you turn this into a war. Embarrassing. Fine, I'll say salsa's pretty good, but the fact that it's above guacamole.

I'll trade right now. I'll trade pimento cheese for spicy salsa off the A tier right now. Post draft trades? Post draft trades. Team guac. We got post draft trades. Team guac will hear you out. What do you have to say?

I will drop salsa for you, because it doesn't deserve to be where it is I was simply playing defense against Glock, but I would like pimento cheese back where it belongs He went into business for himself and tried to take it below the earth's crust All right, so this the salsa drop I'm Suggesting pimento cheese for salsa take pimento cheese a but you bring guac with him. He doesn't care about either of those things. That's our deal. Those are our terms.

I care about pimento cheese. You just want the cheese. You don't care about the cheese. I care about pimento cheese. Brandon, those are our terms. You take pimento cheese to A. You bring guac with it. I bring guac with me to A?

You bring it with you to A. Yeah, and you got your pimento where you want. No, he's being irrational. What did you say, Che? It can be both in A, book, walk in front of it. You can't have pimento cheese behind it. Yes, I can. I can put that out.

We can put that out. That's insane. Crab dip is the one that's... Crab dip is the one that's out of... Post-trap trade crab dip to be. Are they in sequence? I wanna say something right now, and this might get... The fact that y'all put buffalo chicken dip at s and just never never question

Dude there's never been a friend. You can't have not the best spice people will say like oh I'm gonna be bringing my buffalo chicken dip. You're like holy fuck this party's gonna rock I've eaten it what other can you say that guacamole? No, no doesn't change a party Fucking dip it's just holy guacamole. It's a it's a it's an expression of excitement. Holy guacamole part of our culture All right, where do we end up? We just traded pimento cheese and guac for crab dip. I like that. I thought we were dropping salsa why? No, I like that I thought we were dropping salsa why no I like salsa where it's at now is there with it I thought we traded yeah I thought we were

dropping crab dip for sure I think crab dip should replace pimento. What is this? That's it. Print it. Print it. Somebody did make a good suggestion should we just turn this into dip week next week? I have chef Donnie make us and we can like do a real tier list have we ever done a draft a dip wait TJ you just asked should we? Create a week that's not real so chef Donnie cooks for us. Yeah We can make that. We're going to need all the buddy. Get to dip in.

Eat all these steps. Maybe some more French onion dip. I think Delta Ranch should be in there. Yeah. French onion dip is that's a weird. I'm curious French onion dip with a nice ruffle with a crinkle. Yes. TJ. Can you do a salsa guacamole pole? I'm I'm curious French onion dip with it with a nice ruffle with a crinkle. Yes TG Can you do a salsa guacamole pole?

And in the chat, I'm more yeah, so I guess you want to do queso in there also I'm just salsa verse coca so are we that far off? Yeah, we oughta touch queso's above both I don't know we're not even a so is baiting that yeah queso's Yeah, how can you not? Specialty. Queso is in the conversation for Kingdip. It's in the conversation. I gotta run to a meeting.

I'm telling it. I'll see everyone for Plinko Day. Oh, okay, so you're going, okay. All right. All right, Planet Fitness. We got the Planet Fitness gym over there where I do all my workouts in the morning. Before everybody wakes up, I'm over there getting a pump in, looking good. Getting ready for my nap.

Got the Smith Machine, the stair climber, the treadmill, we got all of it. We got that guy sitting there looking good, hanging out by the Planet Fitness gym, looking like Chris Parnell from Saturday Night Live. Yes he is. Yes he really is. Everybody, everybody can get strong at Planet Fitness. Wow he does. It's uh, he looks just like Chris Parnell from Saturday Night Live.

High value membership that supports any fitness journey is low as $15 a month over 2700 club locations. Most clubs are open 24 hours. I like the Smith Machine. It makes me feel strong. It makes me feel like I'm a world builder. Like I'm just out here just being awesome. We're all strong on this planet.

Join today in club online or in the free Planet Fitness app. Planet Fitness. All right. right well that was it's also over guac wow it's early yeah that's I do I think y'all overstayed a clock that's all it's fine if you ask me which one I had to live without the rest of my life I didn't know I would live without this is. I didn't know this was the opinion. This is, yeah, I'm not changing my personal opinion. I have, I'm blown away. Guac is a luxury.

You're also a Kali guy, so you have been privy to the best guac. Yeah, and I guess you're making my argument for me. I think more people have aversions to guac, but the people who tolerate both. That is baked into polls though. If you have aversion to it. to guac but the people who but that rate both that is baked into poles though if you have a version to it that but I think people who tolerate both would prefer guac yeah but you also have to take into account like the likelihood of getting the best version of each thing like why does guac have such a wide

range but the places you go where you get a shitty guac you are almost certainly getting a shitty so but you guys are using its availability against it there's a reason it's the free option in Mexican restaurants is so a ubiquitous and so good tap water Why it really up lay do you pay extra for the guac probably because the ingredients cost more and what because? Because they taste no avocados just taste cost more as more calories I don't think you can equate price to how well I think guac has twice the car. I have no idea I don't count calories guac has a lower floor higher ceiling Compared to salsa like you have to pay extra for it everywhere salsa

Hey, you're personal in the dead against mellow cheese. You can go fuck yourself the crust Region of the country down there, South Carolina Alabama, Louisiana, we all reenactment of me trying pimento cheese for Christmas. Oh That's it you didn't have Good yeah, when it's good. It's the best you didn't go. No, we've been to South Carolina or North Carolina I don't think it's Augusta, Georgia. We haven't had good crab did that I've had good crab dip

Oh, so you know you know good you know good and bad crab dip not good But I live in bad Maryland for three years crab dip Maryland for three I live every dip this response is here. I live in that state for three large amount of I live in places because of Three I've taken the dip tour. Yes, I live in Hagerstown, Maryland for three years you live in Hagerstown Yeah, that's so close to the water not even West Virginia. I can think of in the moment All joke to just like he's been lying about salsa. I haven't been lying about salsa. Dropped my phone.

I have that song in my head now. However, California, you're more likely to get better salsa also. Yeah. And you still feel that way about salsa. I do, yeah. Complicated. I think guac is better.

I've said my piece. And I won't speak anymore on the matter. Unless. Unless we keep talking. Unless I get worked up. Yeah, right, right, which case Kyle? I didn't know you were that big of a guac guy. Oh, I love it. I Will I could eat infinity guac if I was at a party of the chips and guac or at a restaurant where there's just unlimited Chips and guac I would just never stop eating it is avocado on the superfood. I also like Superfoods a weird What was the first superfood I think it's marketing it's just marketing

I'm hearing good things about blueberries Blueberries got good PR these days blueberries are great people always talk about the benefits. They don't taste blue to me. No, they don't No, they don't taste blue to me. No they don't. No they don't. They don't taste blue at all. They taste almost appley. They are blue though. They're well named. But if you grab a handful of blueberries, they're going to taste vastly different.

Than one singular blueberry? One will be very good, one will be very bad. Yeah, you're right. Oh I see. There's a lot of variety with these. There's always a bad berry. You can kind of tell. Not a consistent berry. To some degree.

You have to accept if you're eating a bowl of blueberries, you're going to have six bad blueberries. Yeah. Very bad. God, I'll go to bat for blackberries. Don't you guys? Stuck in the teeth. That might be my favorite berry.

They're consistent. Blackberries, your favorite berry? You grab a handful of blackberries, they're all gonna taste the same, and that's very good I'd rather do rasp, but then black a little mushy But good I'm worried about the future of the show Right now that's all I'm saying We haven't even discussed his line on the other that says our pistachios overrated that might that might tear the whole bar

Oh, no overpriced. They're not overrated. That's not really not they're solid. I Prefer the cashew. I like cashew more Don't like cashew more than pistachio. Yeah, how sure one Stashes are the best pistachios are like cuz they're expensive. I only have them like when I'm down the shore on vacation with a beer It's like always like a ooh, I associate they're not that expensive. I only have them on vacation. They're in my world. They're fancy nut Oh, but if someone has like a bowl of pistachios in their house, I'm like, okay but that we're not doing two in a day but con is good but you you don't have them straight I have them in pies I have them lays that serve the best part of a mixed nut can pecan you got a mix nut cam of guns you're going straight to them

that does look bad well we ended up on a didn't it's be oh it is embracing debate That's terrible looking walk. Yeah, that is a bad. You know what y'all are all Looks bad. Yeah, it's sly and I'm fine. I'm loading and stuff. I know guacamole looks good My green slime it's what that's what every other did looks good I would fuck every one of those go penis and all of those sales heard that women sales heard Probably should have yelled. I would fuck every one of those We're talking about guac. We're just talking about dip buffalo chicken dip is not pretty no note pretty much no dip

No dip is pretty what's on the inside? Yeah, you're right Casos pretty hey so it's beautiful. Hey, so yeah, I don't know Jesus pretty casos orange slime. Yeah, it's all the consistency of this No, it's golden slime. It could be white. Yeah, it could be white that looks like that. I Don't I think y'all overrated? I don't I think y'all overrated The slightest bit of spice we got to get off this we got that we can all unite on what can we all unite on please Our chicken salad and like tuna salad tuna tuna. Are they not they can be yeah They can I have eaten them on a chip

I did it on a chip if they are then chicken salad is s and you can But I wouldn't consider them dips personally, but they can be I use them as dips ham salad. Oh my god 80 years old Profile profile what are we doing? We're gonna make fun of Maddie born. Yeah, what is sure? Let's see what else she likes and dislikes? Take a wild guess at... Oh, Philly. She's a Philly girl. She's from the Goochland palette. Oh, she's from the White Girl from Alabama. Doesn't like watch. She's from Virginia.

Oh, would you look at that. She's from Goochland. Is that really a Goochland? Yes. I gotta look this up. You guys ever talked about Jeff Dabes arms and hands? Who? Huh?

Alright, so this is a good pivot away. I got offended to my algorithm and I thought of the anus boys when I saw him for the first time I want this it's an arm wrestler. Oh, is he got the Popeye? Yeah, yes Weirds me out. Oh Kate first thought Wow is that a condition I'd be just his ring I know a guy with hands like that. I learned about Don't don't come on here and lie. I swear to God. Who do you know that has hands like that?

I'll show you he was he's a chilly farmer from New Mexico And he farm chili and I'm gonna show you because it was it an adverse effect from the I don't know I don't know if it's from if it's like natural or if it's from Where in terror and he's a great guy and I'm oh my god You guys see the decapitated head that looks just like Ben Mitz We can all agree on this. Oh my god Wait, so he has a disorder passed. That's wreck it Ralph. Obviously. That's probably painful. It looks like he's in pain Yeah, that seems terrible

Yeah, that's I see a picture him and his wife when he beats off his dick has to look small. What does he hold? Yeah, that's got to be tough. I said to do Nick Jeff dabe yeah, you can probably see the hand situation tight. It's good pivot great pivot I bet he was dip the fuck out of a dip with those hands you were filming this guy without him knowing no You know she got I was working on the chili. He has those hands. You were filming this guy without him knowing. No, he knew. I was working on the chili stick. He has big hands. They're not like this, but they're big.

They're big. Yeah. Maybe not quite, but they're like similar. No disease here. No disease. Oh, wow. He's just really good at science and disease. I disagree.

Yeah, I would say if they. No gigantism. His forearms match the hands. Wait, even as a baby? Are those his baby pictures? His hand goes down her whole upper arm. His hands are big as a toddler. So is baby pictures. Yeah, his hand goes down her hole looks like Popeye Toddler so is he like the the goat of armrest I didn't make it that far I was just better made it by what he's like Andre the Giants arms, but not the rest of the body. Yeah small head That's a big cheese

He's only like out how he's got five. Yeah, he's only like five nine. He's tall If it's not a disease there's gonna be one named after my arms big fingers somebody must have crushed your pivot Big old hands That would be cool wife Nah for a day. Yeah, I'd love it for a day. He couldn't put his fingers in the bowling ball There wasn't a single size all that I'm out any hand. We can't write with a pen. He throw it like a softball Yeah, he got a big pencil. Oh perfect for him He has no gloves by the way Popeye is like super inappropriate with one last time you guys watch Popeye

It's a sea assault olive oil. He just says really like fucked up shit the whole show. Oh, it's hilarious but the other Always a wrestler Kyle Brutal is that the other guy Pluto Pluto? Yeah, he's he's trying to yes Yeah, he's really yeah, so comparatively Popeyes the hero kind of the hero What is Popeye saying like he'll be like, oh, what are we in China? He's like constantly saying oh and like much under his breath. Yeah You have to like really listen for it. And yeah, there's a sin bad the sailor great Popeye episode and He's saying racist shit. It's disguised like the same way Disney would put that shit in their movies? It's like not disguised.

It's like way more egregious, but it's funny. Like it just sucks shit back then. Yeah, Popeye was just this like racist sailor. It's like kinda hilarious. I always wondered like the genie from Aladdin, there's a part where he's like, good teenagers, take off their clothes. Like is Robin Williams saying that himself?

Is someone telling him to do that? Did you just sneak it in there? I don't know. He's ad-libbing the parts about taking off your clothes? There was like hidden things. Yeah, they were like having a conversation. He says it under his breath. The movies, like the priest in Little Mermaid has a boner.

His heart is a rock. Yeah. Yeah, there's a boner on the castle on the cover of the VFX. It says clouds and Lion King. Yeah. It sure does. Yeah.

Kyle, this is kind of similar to the big arms guy. Have you seen the kid on TikTok that's working out one side of his body only? I've seen the dude doing one trap in his dorm room. Why is he doing that? Is this real? Yeah. Oh yeah. Why is he doing this?

Look at his neck. What the fuck? This is an experiment. He seems to work everything else out and then just does one trap. His whole back is going get fight. Yeah, he's gonna get fucked up. He's gonna have bad disc injuries Why do you got glasses after he started it looks just like it see plan on doing the other sorter? Yeah, I think he's getting it looks like he was fucked up, and then he decided to fake do this This is a tennis players arms look like I was parents kicked him out because he's doing this. Have you ever seen the build of like bikers like Tour de France bikers? They look goofy. Why? Because their legs are so wide. That's

the I think he just has a thing. This is as a parent. I'm like, what if this is what my kid chooses to do? Like, what do I do? What do you do with these? He's a beast. Okay. He's something to look at hmm No hate, but why It's telling Yeah, there is a chance that there was just a thing and now he's just like leaning into it I can't seem like he did it on purpose

Right, which is a logical thing. I'd be yeah hope It's a solid move. I Would do that anybody here have a body part. That's way bigger than the other matching body part Hmm not way bigger my thumbs are different sizes my right ear is's a lot bigger in my left. Wait, what? Oh. You should get that checked out. Okay, I see. Is that why you went into podcasting? I adore headphones.

Is this the big one? The one on your side is the big one, yes. Which one's the deaf one? This one. Your big one's the deaf one? Yeah, yeah, it's useless. Why do you put the headphone on it then? Well, I can hear it on this one.

But you don't cover it up. Yeah, well it doesn't even cover it up, it's still like emerging. Are you seeing that it's noticeably bigger? I can't see the other side, but it's a big ear. It's hard to see both at once. Yeah, I guess that's a good body part to have. When I was skinny, it was more noticeable.

Now that I'm fat, everything just looks bad. I disagree. Disagree. I disagree as well. Yeah. I disagree. You were an ugly man when you got hired. Oh yeah I only had about an 18 month period in my life that I was moderately attracted. I think you're good looking now. I was ugly skinny and then I got fat but there was about between late 2003 and early 2005 I was... But like when you first started, you were like,

you had like red lesions. Yeah. Yeah. What? On his face. Yeah. What was it? I don't know.

I just wear makeup. What are you doing? I wouldn't be talking about it too much. I was like, I need these Skittles. Sorry. Here you go. Red lesions. How do they go away?

You got money? You just grew a beard over them. Yeah, I just grew a beard over over. Yeah, that's all I did I hope you like do we ever white I grew a white beard distinguished Right now has to be in the top percentile of like how you've ever looked Oh, yeah, it's probably top top three to three to five percent. Yeah, and you found your wife at your hottest, right? Yeah, okay So I cast I think that's an age thing

You found your wife at your hottest, right? Yeah. OK, solid. I cashed in on that one. You think that's an age thing? It's amazing. You've aged into it? You think it's a money thing? You think it's a you give a fuck thing now?

I think it's mostly money and lack of stress. What would six year ago Brandon Walker say if he saw you putting sea salt spray in your long hair? He'd be like, wow, somebody taught him how to do hair. That sounds like something he'd say. He's never been taught hair before. I guess somebody got a hold of him. All right, you're kind of going on and on.

You're kind of droning. Were you stressed before, earlier? Oh, no, I was poor. And that, yeah. Same thing. I mean, the only change is really the hair. Oh actually I must have exaggerated you look like Dirk there. Yeah, so that's a much better looking guy than that. Yes Is this a real life black wife effect?

Blow up. I hadn't, I haven't told y'all previously, but my wife has a 65 year old black woman from Detroit, Michigan. Yes. Oh shit. Oh, did your mom get the job? I don't know. She, she hasn't told me she has or hasn't.

She, she, she interviewed the other day and she got a couple more lined up. I'm, I'm, I'm just so nervous for the next 21 days moving her up here. I'm gonna have to go down there and get her. I'm gonna drive her up. I'm just so nervous for the next 21 days moving her up here. I'm going to have to go down there and get her. I'm going to drive her up, so I don't know how much work I have to miss, but I'll have to go move everything. How often are you going to be seeing her? Every day? Every day, yeah. She's going to live from here to across the gym. It's not far at all.

Dude, you should do one of those mover collabs so they just do it for free. Yeah, I guess I could. I moved like four times since I got to Barstool and I just never have thought of that to do it. It might be really nice in this case. Yeah, I would think so, but I don't think she's bringing much up. The problem is she's bringing four dogs and a cat. Whoa.

Yeah. She's used to living on three acres. She will live in, she will not live on three acres now So it's gonna be quite the change for the dogs They'll be fine. Yeah, Basset hound golden doodle mutt pug It's a squad the Basset hound won't notice Basset hounds he's a son of a bitch. Is that you the howl that Basset hound? Yeah, I think so. What is it? Bassett Hounds? Yeah I think so. What is it? Deep throated. That would be gonna rank the dogs. Which one's the least annoying? Which one annoys the cat the least? I think the the stray that she took in that she found on the highway, the mutt acts the

best because she's seen some shit so I think she's the one that doesn't do anything doesn't bother anybody Do certain dogs give you guys the ick at all I feel bad saying yeah Boxers skinny yeah, I don't like I don't like greyhounds. What's the one with like the eye? I feel bad, but the white dogs with the eye goo. Oh, yeah, I can't do it. They're very nice and Pugs I like bugs. I had a pug was like always stamping its butthole and says like buttholes weird Boston Terriers are the only dogs I've ever had problems with greyhounds weird me out Any dog that I spend six hours

Automatically like yeah, that's yeah, so like I can overcome being eked out by a breed. You say six hours Yeah, I think it's like six minutes Not quite enough for me Wow That's a long time. But if I dog sit a really ugly dog, by the end of the weekend, I think it's the cutest dog of all time, and I cry when I give it back.

The only two dog breeds I've met that were actually mean. Thanks for opening up. Wow. That was beautiful. It's the end of the show. Yeah. Yeah. Dalmatians and Boston Terriers are mean.

They'll bite you just for the fun of it. The rest of them are whatever. Yeah. Yeah, Dalmatians had pretty good PR for a while. They did. With much-won Dalmatians, now they're meaner than a Doberman. They're assholes. I don't really see them.

You know how people take their dog everywhere now? Yes. The other day I was in a grocery store. And it's one thing if you're walking along and you've got your dog, your little dog, maybe it's in the basket or something. One had a full-grown Doberman You can't be doing that and like no

Ninety-nine percent of Dobermans are probably gonna act perfectly, but there's like one percent that will be fucking assholes You can't you can't risk them snapping at the fucking grocery store I love dogs so much, but people are taking them every people are ruining dogs My local coffee shop is an animal shelter, and I love dogs more than anyone. I love dogs so much, but people are taking them every- People are ruining dogs. My local coffee shop is an animal shelter and I love dogs more than anyone. I love dogs. Dogs are awesome. They don't belong everywhere.

Keep them at home. It's true. All right. All right. Let me clear that up. Julio, thank you, man. You'll spin the wheel, TJ? Thank you, guys.

Come see me in Boston, 12th of June. Are you talking to fans or us? You guys too, if you want to come. And Che, if you want to open the show, so I can sell some more tickets. Does he have a standing invitation to open for you? Yes. Che, any time you're trying to work it out, come on down, pal.

Love to hang. I think we learned today it does need a little work. Hey, this is just a tough. This is an ambush. Just get sharper. This was an ambush. But yeah, I mean, I would be open to doing something in the future.

Sweet. We'll see. All right, TJ. Resetting it? Nope, it's dry. Hold, damn. All right, we'll see you guys tomorrow. Go, guys. Can't wait for dip week wow what a fucking show I I was like crimping up laughing so

hard alright see you guys tomorrow love you guys bye go have some dip tonight send your dip pics wait dip pics to the yak alright love you guys bye