The Yak - Dave Portnoy Cuts the Ribbon for the Will Compton Bathroom Museum | The Yak 9-5-24

Episode Date: September 5, 2024

Will Compton picks out Cheah's next bust spotYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

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It is Will Compton Day. Will Compton! Congratulations. It is your day. We all have your shirts. If you can zoom in, it says... Will Compton Day. taking place in the bathroom and then it has all of his uh teams and numbers and the falcons almost

you know i was telling you before this too you missed one yeah 53 on the skins yeah my very first game i want to just clear right now The Wilcompton Museum We have no problem with We're not doing name changes You played on the Redskins Yeah, HCTR There's probably going to be a riot at some point Take down the Wilcompton Museum

It's already cancelled Take down that museum You gotta stand on business there But yes, it is Will Compton Day. We have a big day. We are going to start the ceremony around 1245 when Dave is done with the Zoom call. He is the ribbon cutter. We're going to debut the museum.

Will, you're going to give a speech, correct? Yeah. And we also have Donnie cooking Will's favorite meal which god love will the guy doesn't really think about things all the way through so this one i did because i switched my order no you didn't so will initially wanted uh sliders which i told donnie sliders uh will then text me last night he was like hey I want to change my order last second to my favorite meal, chili and peanut butter sandwiches. Will, your museum is in a bathroom,

and you're going to have us all eat chili. Well, it checks out. It all makes sense. I don't think you thought that through. I thought you were. No, look at him. Look at his face. I see what you're going to have us all eat chili. Well, it checks out. It all makes sense, yeah. I don't think you thought that through. I thought you were. No, look at him. Look at his face. I see what you're saying.

The bathroom and the chili. But chili and peanut butter sandwiches, I promise you guys. But you basically were like maximum amounts of explosion in the museum the minute it opens. We got to start fast. We got to open it up with a bang. He said chili. Was that serious

i thought he was just making that up oh no yeah but i'm saying what you know chili and peanut butter is a staple are we laughing at the chili with the bathroom or the peanut butter with the chili i think it's both i think we laugh at the chili in the bathroom and then the peanut butter and the peanut butter chili i can see the vision peanut butter is versatile i've never had it but goes with any yeah that would be great yeah Yeah. So we're going to have that. Peanut butter. Donnie's cooking it up. You're creating demand for the museum.

You open it up, there's going to be a line out the door. True. To get in there. True. Immediately. You definitely didn't think about this, though. When you said chili, I was like, okay. Who do you think will be the first one?

You know what? Let's do weak old Chinese food. Yeah. Yeah. Give everyone food poisoning. Gas station sushi. Yeah. But I'm excited.

It's Wilconton Day. I've been procuring a lot of items. I am curious to see what you've gathered out there. It looks beautiful. You've damn near gone into debt over this. I was talking to Will earlier. I think there's some very entrepreneurial people out there who have realized that the will compton memorabilia market has is booming because i'm bidding on a pair of pants that i don't need but i need and i think that

guy's gonna just keep jacking up the price of it i mean if you're out there and you have a piece of something you should 100 put it on ebay for at least a couple i will buy it i will buy it how much money have you spent? Um, I still got to figure out. And what have there been people that just sent you stuff too? I've gotten a couple things. There might be a couple of things in there that you're like, what,

how? Mm hmm. I thought I had that. Okay. Yeah. Uh, so I might've been gifted a couple things. I also would like to shout out,

uh, Belvita cheese. My guy, Belvita cheese my guy belvita cheese uh he he was he's still alive yeah he's still alive he he was very integral in the will compton museum i still got to figure out what i got to send him okay so he might have been the original guy so yeah to explain to people how this all started because you were looking for it started we were looking for like i was just on ebay because we were like doing stuff for our new set the locker room go ahead and watch that and um i was typing in will compton memorabilia and i see this jersey and it's the alternate uniform in my second start that i ever had it was against the titans and i was thinking to myself how is that jersey in somebody else's hands and

it was on ebay for 1700 fucking dollars and so i obviously tweeted about it which hindsight probably a great move because i got a museum yeah right right that was the that was the domino yeah and then people are like hey do you want this jersey yada yada and they're like hey it's taken down and then i see big cat he tried calling me i didn't know what it was for at first and then i then i realized big cat was you were you were prime suspect number one yeah i'm my goal is to purchase your life from you i want to own your life yeah will i don't want you to die especially before. But if you do while this show's going on, can we have you? Yeah. Can we put your ashes in the Wilcompton Museum?

This would be a big get. Or his body. Oh, yeah, we stuff him. Oh, the body. Yeah, him sitting on the shitter. Yeah. And then you've got to sit on his lap. You've got to shit in between his legs.

Maybe we go. Maybe I'll give you half of me. Bottom. Bottom. Yeah yeah sitting on the toilet take up a lot of room yeah bottom would fit but yeah so now i uh i want it all yeah i'm definitely in one of those spots at the moment right now where you're getting like celebrated and you just feel very uncomfortable because all we're talking about is is me and my memorabilia yeah yeah i'm trying to get into your headspace like the will compton

headspace and i know your things are football digital media and fatherhood what's fourth oh man good question session wise like what do you... I mean, currently, College Football 25. Throughout the history of your life. Like, what's your fourth thing? Rocky. Rocky? Rocky! Franchise?

Yeah. Deep thinker. Yeah. Which is your favorite one? My personal favorite is two. Interesting. Yeah. What's yours, Brandon?

Mine is also two well well well well my favorite rocky movie is creed but i consider them separate so uh but most people would say four or three but people who say four like you know that's like mainstream they're basic bitches yeah i like two yeah very easy to say four but the the real ones, no. Two. Two. Okay. So that's your passion. He's right. That's my fourth. That's your passion.

Yeah. Did you get him any gifts? Did anyone bring any gifts for him? No. No, I forgot. We'll have this one that got sent. Oh. Yep.

By whom? You know who. Nope. I don't. You want me to read this? Cliff. No. Hey, Yak gang. It's an honor and a privilege to have this piece of art played oh yes only will compton bathroom stall hall of fame if ticket sales are high and

you're looking to expand your museum i know a girl yes wow chilling with chels it got here like 10 minutes ago oh that's express because of the holiday. Oh, she wrapped it really nice. We actually left a space open for this. Oh, this is perfect. So this is what's going to stare at people. Wow. Beautiful.

Okay, can you go? Well done, Chelsea. Kate, can you go to the bathroom right now? Caitlin's outside. Yeah. Protecting it. They'll put that up. Perfect. We got a space. We left a space for it. She go to the bathroom right now? Caitlin's outside protecting it. They'll put that up. Perfect.

We got a space. We left a space for it. She's guarding the bathroom. Is it down here? Yeah, it's that one. We already have security? Oh, yeah. No, Caitlin and Jacob have spent all morning putting together the final touches of the

Wilcompton Museum. Should we hire somebody full-time to be the guide and security? Yeah. Night shift? Yeah. Why not? Look at that. Yeah. Night shift. Yeah. Why not? Look at that. Chelsea is the best.

It's really good. It's beautiful. What? Neck. Nice neck. Thank you. All right, so. Hey, thinner neck now.

Yeah. Are you cool with that? We lost your neck? Yeah. Yeah. But before we get to more Will Compton stuff, we got some business to do. We got some Stephen Chase stuff. Also, if everyone saw last night, Mook tweeted out he's got a new project.

What's it called? Mook Can't Sleep. Mook Can't Sleep. Go follow it. So Mook is stepping away from the yak. He talked at length with me, KB, and Nick. The big thing with this show and this job is if you're not happy, it's really hard to be creative.

And if you're ever finding yourself dreading doing something, it's a real, like, suck on your creativity and want to do. So I'm happy for Mook. I think he's going gonna crush his new project he's gonna work more on his stand-up yeah yeah yeah yeah this should be the best job ever and when it stops not when it stops being that you have the luxury to do something else yeah and so uh he talked about it on anus so if you want to listen to anus you can get the words from mook but he's not dead to this show he's you know he'll he's

still around he's i think he's very funny he's he's still going to be here every day around to the office so when we do big things he can be included so that like 11 p.m to 1 a.m time slot is perfect oh it's so we've been trying to get someone to take that time slot forever dave had an idea of brandon don't didn want that? Yeah, we were going to go to most of sports then, but it just didn't feel right. Yeah. We were trying to get... I remember when we first moved to New York, it was going to be like Glennie Balls and Dave going

to like Madison... Times Square at like 1 in the morning. That would have been pretty good. Yeah, it would have been awesome. So we got some night programming for everyone. There we go. Yeah. It's huge. They're building... He's's live tonight he's having chat build his hinge oh i love it and he'll do what you say taking voicemail you don't have to ask you bought burner phone yep yeah so i mean it'll this will ruin his life but he'll have fun doing it and he'll build his

own audience yeah you know is there to to opt in to move so i'm very excited for him uh like i said it wasn't something that just was rash that just came overnight uh we talked about it a lot and i think we're in a good spot yeah he deserves a supportive audience and he has that but it needs to be yeah all support and i want him to come to work happy to come to work so that's gonna be that's gonna be the thing um che came yeah yeah really ejaculated did he tweet it uh-huh oh yeah no i saw i didn't the jerseys i thought that was for the nfl being i didn't know what i think no one that fooled me the jerseys is perfect will uh che got a vasectomy last week i saw that he wasn't allowed to come for seven days, and we've told him that he's got to tweet every time he comes. So he's going to do NFL numbers. So that was the first one.

Do we get to ask the question, how did you spend your first time? My family was out of town. Oh, are they out of town all weekend? So I have to take a flight tomorrow to Green Bay. Mile High Club? Number two. Mile High Club? There we go.

I am a former member. You're a lifetime member of the Mile High Club. Yeah, that's true. It's only an hour flight. So you've got to get, what, two? How long do you need to get to working? Now, Che. Standing up in an airplane bathroom?

This first time, was it shower? No. Whoa. Did it hurt? No, I was pretty worried it was going to. You were sensitive with yourself? Doing it at night was a little bit of a risk because if something goes wrong. It was tender.

It was a soft jerk. Do you get into it right away? Do you go, you get to the goal line right away, or do you like to edge a little bit? That's a great question. It's a fairly quick scoring drive. Are you running two-minute offense? No huddle?

Typically. Last night was not two-minute offense. It was a 10-play drive. It had to have been tip play. You a tip guy or a shaft guy? I mean, I'm a whole thing guy. Are you? Oh, yeah, but like the whole thing.

The whole damn thing. Are you ambidextrous? No, I'm a righty. Jay, you didn't pause the precipice? No, I was more worried about the actual. I mean, we can get into some more advanced techniques down the line. But, you know, for number one, you just want to play it safe. Yeah.

Nice and easy. So you were just going, like, easy check down completions. Yup. What the defense gave him. Can't go broke taking a profit. I can't wait for those back-to-back tweets. Yeah. Like, number 26 and number 27 are, like, two hours apart.

I almost went number two this morning, but we held back. Why? I had to go get a haircut. Oh, man. And you're – so is number two on the horizon here? What are we – I think I'm going to stay here through the game, so probably not. But I don't know how far the game goes.

Maybe I'll be in a good room. Big Cat, please give him permission. It would be an honor for you to do ejaculated Will Compton music. The Will Compton. It would be an honor. I don't think I can do that right now. It would be an honor.

Don't ask him to. Tell him it would make your day. You do run the risk of being a pervert if you jack off too much. So if I were you, I would pull back for sure. Your guess was like 2025, right? That's going to be no worse. Jay, am I allowed to request for Wilcompton Day? Yes, of course.

It's your day. You have to fulfill? Yes. It would make my day if you yanked it in the Wilcompton Museum. With that portrait present. No phone, though. You only have to. Yeah, no phone. Chase, use your phone.

You got more than enough on the walls. Look at what's on the walls. Chase, you're smart enough for a memory jerk, aren't you? Those have been done from time to time, when necessary. Oh, man. Video guy? Really? Of course time. When necessary. Video guy? Really? Of course.

Is anyone not a video guy? You never know. But you said from memory when necessary? Yeah, like if your phone's dead or if you forever use your phone. Where are you where you can't plug your phone in and you can jerk off? In the cavern? I guess if you're ever in the shower. That's not a very often thing.

This is like we should do a reality series like naked and afraid it's just like jerking off from memory drop a guy into an office with no chargers Jay next time you do you should you should also post the link and what you did it too oh yeah I've been sent a few links from people yeah Yeah, I sent one to the porn the other night. He likes big tits and the guy. And you should post the time stamp when you stop the video so we can try to beat you. Yeah. I will admit, once it was over last night, I was very much looking forward to tweeting out the gif. Yeah, and you do feel like you're not as tense right now.

You were on edge yesterday i was i was yeah it was yeah you didn't happen to a man yeah and you you didn't get hurt doing the punts i didn't thank god the punch stream i think people were mad that it ended so quickly uh so what happened was yeah you got titus was saying beforehand we did the 41 free throws and we got nothing after we did an hour and a half of punts and we went to a really nice dinner. We went to a team dinner, yeah. But it was classic because the minute we finished, I think

Rico and Jerry, I've never seen two brains so lockstep. They just started yelling at Dave, team dinner, team dinner, team dinner. Just like they saw a hole to get a free dinner and they just attacked it. But it was a nice team dinner. It was a beautiful team dinner just like they saw a hole to get a free dinner right just attacked it uh but it was a nice team dinner it was a beautiful team dinner sounded awesome yeah yeah we had a good time oh

yeah that's tough that yeah that actually i told him afterwards though he actually did us all a favor because i think people were mad that it ended so quickly and then this just took this whole narrative this full like it was all worth it for that picture so we have like new takeaways from his hair how i don't think the technology in turkey can no i don't i don't think it's there yet i don't think if they double his hair yeah he's brock bowers who oh really yeah yeah that's brutal i will say white socks dave's hair looked very good last night after he showered yeah he told us there's is the way his barber cuts it there's a specific way he's supposed to wear it and if he doesn't wear it that way then you get this if you showed me just the top and you said this just came out of a woman's, like this is the top of a baby head that was just born.

Oh, yeah. I would be like, yeah. He's cresting. He's cresting, yeah. You could put that in the, like, yeah. That's a baby that just came out. Push. Oh, gross.

Do you want to reach down and touch the head? Yeah. That's a head that we need to, like, make sure is breathing. Yeah. Is he crying yet? Did he cry? Oh, my God. Oh, poor Dave.

But yeah, Eddie got hurt. I don't know what his prognosis is, but he was pretty nervous that he got actually hurt. He thinks he tore his Achilles. No, wait. I heard an update this morning. What? Grade one calf strain. Okay. No Achilles tear is what I heard. Oh, he thought he tore his Achilles for real? Yeah. What? Grade one calf strain. Okay.

No Achilles tear is what I heard. Oh, he thought he tore his Achilles for real? Yeah. Which would have been two in a row. Yeah, the Riggs thing. I thought I was going to tear my Achilles yesterday because I also strained my calf, and I was like, if this takes 12 hours, I feel like they're related. Yeah.

Like, if you fuck up your calf, your Achilles is going to go. Yeah. I was like, if I have to stay out here for another 12 hours, because I did it like 30 minutes in. And then you only stayed 15 more minutes. I hope that update's right. I heard it from Spider right before the show started. So maybe that's right. Maybe it's wrong. What ended up happening with Riggs?

He tore his Achilles. Yeah, so I thought Eddie was like joking. No, he was in a lot of pain. And people were like obviously like oh you planned that no we didn't plan mincy also it does suck because like that would be the one like on the heels of reeks like that would be the one injury that you would if you were faking quote unquote you would say what reeks had yeah yeah yeah actually che checked his achilles right after he's a doctor now he's an achilles checker? I did and I told him

it wasn't torn. How do you know? There's a test. Okay. And you can basically feel Achilles is attached and Eddie's was attached. Riggs I was pretty unsure about

and Will can confirm. I said I thought he tore his Achilles. I can confirm. What's your worst injury, Will, in your career? The toe. Yeah, I did shatter my toe at Camp Barstool. I tore my PCL.

But surgery-wise, my labrum. I had that one, too. I mean, that's – I hated that. It was like nine months for me. Yeah. Nine? It took forever, yeah. Man.

But I'm not – Are you paranoid after that is it like hard mentally to get past that or no it just sucks because you need so much help in the first couple months yeah like you have to sleep in a chair right yeah yeah damn it sucked the pain block wore off the first night and i had to go i had to go puke and i couldn't make it to the bathroom i ended up puking all over my coach's carpet, wall. I was trying to clean it up at like 3 a.m. before I had to go wake him up.

Why were you at your coach's house? He let me stay there because I was in a dorm. Oh, college. I was in a dorm. Who was that? What coach? I don't want to get him in trouble because that was definitely a violation. For sure. Coach Eckler.

Oh. He don't know. Coach Eckler. Oh. He also sold me. He also. Sold you? You know what? Where's he coached now? Yeah. Where's he?

I don't know. I don't know. He was your guy. Tennessee. Yeah, that's my guy. That's your guy. Love that. Yeah.

I wish we had him here today. What was your worst injury, Kyle? Me? Rotator cuff So similar to labrum What about the herpes that you couldn't open your mouth? Oh yeah if you count like Skin diseases

If you count herpes You literally couldn't open your mouth You've never shown me the picture I think you showed Big Cat Yeah I remember So bad You saw the picture?

No I remember when he passed it around and showed others and he wouldn't show us. My mouth was like anatomically sewn shut via lesions from impetigo and sores. And they were... Well, they itched, burned, and hurt. Biblical skin disease. Did you go to class when you had it? I couldn't even drive. I had my parents pick me up.

And you went home? Yeah, I didn't go to class. I went into the dermatologist with my hood tight covering up my face. Wow. So embarrassed. Things change.

But, you know, life is more brutal than not yeah yeah yeah um let's do let me rip an ad because we got a we got a bunch of ads today uh raycon you may have heard me talk about raycon's everyday earbuds before and thought wait the same audio quality expect from the big guys but half the price sounds pretty good but if you haven't pulled the trigger on a pair of raycons now is the time check them out because they just launched their upgraded model, the best-selling everyday earbuds with Raycons upgraded everyday earbuds. Now you also get active noise cancellation, ergonomic design,

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They're awesome. Noise cancellation. I feel like you're in a movie theater. Yeah. So go right now. Buyraycon.com slash yak. Buyraycon.com slash yak buy raycon.com slash yak will do you have did you write down a speech do you have a do you have a written or yeah i got i got something you do yep and tell me lastly you say you got to come with a speech you got to come with a speech

any chance you get emotional possible yeah i think that's fine possible i would hope for a riggs moment yeah me too as soon as dave's down here we're gonna we're gonna do it we're gonna break we're gonna cut the ribbon it's gonna be is dave excited to do this oh he's so excited i asked him he's like yes i'd love to do this hell yeah yeah yeah i'm excited yeah yeah yeah not there's only so much you can say right yeah was your wife like you're going to do what there no she doesn't know oh she doesn't know she kept that one close to the vest yeah i told will before there was the i was very close to maybe trying to contact his wife and have her do a video being like daddy we love you that would maybe be next year's will come yeah this will be an annual day yeah are you gonna do you got to do the gauntlet at some point today i'll do the on your day yeah i'll do the gauntlet

with your toe that will be tricky but i think i can you're i can figure it you're a warrior i mean you kept fighting through camp with a toe. Yeah, but fortunately we were in the water. Yeah. Which I don't think I... That toe was brutal. I still haven't really fully recovered from us in the water. The whole underside was yellow.

The water knocked you guys down worse than I've seen anything knock you guys down before. Me and Big Cat were in hell. Like legitimately in hell. Trying to recover. I couldn't breathe. Yeah. My heart rate was 135 30 minutes after.

He's not lying. He's not lying. Seriously, I was like, I think I had cardiac arrest. I was truly scared that I was going to catch a full body cramp and nobody was going to be able to help us. Because we got out and nobody's like, hey, here's some water. I'm like, hey, is there any water around here? There's a water fountain up there. Y'all fucking dying.

You just want to hand me a Mountain Dew? You're just laying on that wooden table with just covering yourself in ice. Oh, man. But we put it all on the line. We did. We did. Proud of our team. Proud of our team. Proud of our team.

That was so much fun. I can't wait to go back. Did you have a newfound respect for swimmers? Oh, yeah. Well, I always had a respect for swimmers because if you just swim two laps, you know how hard it is. Yeah. It's so hard. Yeah.

I didn't. I didn't know. Yeah, you talk trash about Michael Phelps. It was more of like, I don't think he's the greatest athlete. What was the article? It was like he was the greatest athlete of the century or something. It was the greatest athlete of this century or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, that's right. ESPN's. But due to the shit talking, I was laying on that table and being like, hey, I did say some things that I heavily regret now. Yeah, they're monsters. And his workouts, he would just swim for miles. But you're better at football than him, so it's kind of even. It's one-to-one, really, in the matchup.

I don't. Is that? That's fact. Michael Phelps, if he. No. I don't know if you'd. You think you'd be able to cover Michael Phelps in space? 100%.

I don't. Get my hands on him. Pretty tall. Or his arms are really long he's very rangy he's not going to be quick off the line of scrimmage look at how long he is

I think it's the bait he's built to be a swimmer he makes a living being quick off the blocks and getting into the water faster than everybody else that's off two feet

not a staggered stance I don't know he staggers a stance how tall is Michael Phelps he's like 6'5". Oh, my God. His wingspan is insane. He doesn't even have to run a route.

He just posts up and just throws up. And he'll just throw it here. I think he's got you. He'll put. Yeah, he might just keep it. Yeah, Wes. 6'4", 198. 6'4", 198.

He's just big boy him. It's funny how quick people forget. Or doing them. Wait, we can't do this today. We cannot do this today. We can't do this today. We cannot do this today. We can't do this today. Not today. Of all days, not today.

Not today. In that jersey that you bought, we played the Titans. Yeah. All pro, pro bowl, Delaney Walker. Two catches, 15 yards. How about that? Damn. How about that?

And now that jersey's in a bathroom. Yeah. Yeah. We'll hear about that during Delaney's speech today. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, we should have had Delaney here today. Yeah, I love Delaney.

He's the best. Yeah, you got your new show out. Go listen. Yeah, The Locker Room. I'll check it out. Yeah. We also, so... Don't. Yeah, the locker room. I'll check it out. Yeah. We also, so. Don't look at me.

I will. Are you guys, at the end of the locker room, I heard you guys are spinning a wheel to see who has to hit the showers. Yeah, yeah. We got a wheel involved. We're doing like a Mount Rushmore thing. Nice. A lot of good segments.

I like it. I think it's going to be good. We're going to start doing streaming good we're gonna start doing a streaming we're gonna do a college football 25 dynasty oh fuck yeah love that get the whole office involved i think that's fun man maybe do like the sunbelt or something yeah something maybe the mac a lower lower lower conference for sure i'm feeling emissions of authentic tension what uh wait brandon what's going on with the mostly sports dynasty you you quit no i didn't quit we played that game i lost that game oh i were really mad he quit he quit he broke i had to convince him to unquit yeah you did quit for a second i was gonna quit i wanted

to quit you did quit i quit for a second. I got you to unquit. But Tate's just a bitch. Oh, my God, Brandon. Tate's just a fucking bitch. He Gronk spiked the controller. Yeah, I spiked it. And then when it didn't break fully, I... No, but don't get on me for this.

What are you talking about? Yeah, that's bullshit. Brandon, we did say you can do whatever you want when it's... He's a man versus man. We don't need to watch this stuff. What are you talking about? That's bullshit. Brandon, we did say you can do whatever you want. He's a man versus man. We don't need to watch this part. What are you doing? We don't need to watch this part. Yeah.

That was tough. No, it wasn't tough. Just play football like a man. That's all. Play football like a man. Play video game football like a man. What was he doing? He was chewing clock in the first quarter.

It was 0-0 first quarter. He started chewing clock. And I finally convinced him. I said, turn chew clock off. And he said, all right, I'll turn it off. And he looks at Titus with his little punk-ass smirk. And then he puts his controller down. That was funny.

And he's not chewing clock. He's just letting the clock go down. It was funny. And so I took my controller and tried to break his controller. And I threw it at it. And I broke my controller. If we're not playing football, I'm not playing. If we're not playing football, I'm not playing. I'm not playing.

I'm not playing if we're not playing football. That is football. In what world am I not playing football? That is football. That is football. That's not video game football. Play video game football like a man. Brandon, video game football isn't supposed to be fun.

Yeah. Play like a man. You're a football guy. Is that a viable football? Brandon, video game football isn't supposed to be fun. Yeah. Like a man. You're a football guy. Is that a viable strategy in football to control the possession? You don't want to get pissed at them when they do it? No, but if I'm facing a superior opponent I'm thinking, alright, I gotta control the possession. He wasn't

facing a superior opponent. He was just doing it to be a dick. He was better than me. Wait a minute, I think... Then if he's better than you, he wants to get the game over with. I think this whole pile on Brandon thing has legs. Yeah, yeah, we should do this. We should start doing this. For a long time. Uninterrupted.

Hell, I'll use it as a crutch. Pussy. It's Wilcompton Day. Brandon can't sleep. It's Wilcompton Day. It's Wilcompton Day. It's Wilcompton Day. Wilcompton Day.

It's Wilcompton Day. We got to just keep our eyes on the prize. Right. It's Wilcompton. He's the one we're here for. My birthday's in a couple weeks. What? Yeah.

Why didn't you tell us that before we did Wilcompton Day? We could have consolidated. Well, because then I don't get two days. Yeah, that's true. Damn good point. That's a really good point. September 19th. Wow.

And it's a Thursday. Oh! Exactly two weeks. So we're just going to do a Will Compton Day again in two weeks. How old are you turning? 35. Ugh. Only 35?

You're still a young child. I'm back. I'll be goddamn. You still got a lot left in you. How old are you? 39. 45. That was, I got a little bad.

No, not oof. Not, not. It's Will Compton Day. It's Will Compton Day. Brandon, I felt i i almost i basically channeled your inner anger yesterday at the chat during the punch stream because they were like mad at me that i got hurt and i was just like i'm fucking 39 years old yeah full pads i didn't stretch at all i'm a moron i'm out of shape what did they want they always want us to

have maximum pain like they wanted you to always want us to have maximum pain. They wanted you to not succeed so fast. They wanted us to still be there. Which I understand. Yeah. I get it. There's a sweet spot, I think. Yeah. I think the home run thing was a great length.

Six hours. That was a good length. It felt like we were there forever, but it wasn't completely debilitating. Yeah, if it had gone a little longer, I wouldn't have been mad. When you guys celebrated that you completed it, was it it a legit let's all get in here and celebrate or was it i think it was i think it was just because the timing of this stream was poorly thought out in like the first football week of the year we have to travel saturday we have the stream tonight like it was like if we're if we're stuck here for 12 hours it's going to basically

ruin every other show we have to do okay so it was a celebration that it was done yeah not that it was yeah completed completely yeah correct correct correct and our mincey strategy was genius catching it off the roof mincey said so mincey the first hour he had his gloves on backwards or inside out and then he also said before he was like if we if this if we screw this up it won't be because of me and then he just missed like four of the easiest punts ever I love Mincy

what was his glove he should be dead 15 times you have the picture of him with his gloves I think we posted it and then just maybe one of his drops that were like almost inconceivable drops where like the ball is actually resting in his hands. And then he's like, yeah, take it, ground. Who had the highest catch percentage?

You? Maybe me, yeah. I only dropped, I think, one or two. You were a strong player. I was. Yeah, so I think these are inside out or backwards. Oh, my God, man. That is fascinating. Yeah, so I think these are inside out or backwards. Oh, my God, man. That is fascinating.

Yeah. I mean, he's legitimately somebody who's going to have to be put in the home like in his 40s. In his 40s. Yeah. You're right. No, you're right. That's your ringer.

And then there was a picture of him, yeah, halfway through. And then, yeah, I don't know if you can find one of his drops but one of his drops was just and then he also was like we were telling him like don't go for him if you if they're not right at you and then he just obviously didn't listen to that so yeah listen completing any Like, that's in his hand. I don't understand. Why does he do a flip? Why does he flip? That's literally in his hand. How does he do a flip?

How does he do a flip? He gains so much momentum. What a sequence of motions. Come on, Mintz! There's another one, too, TJ. Yeah, that's a catch. Yeah, you... How did that?

That was impressive. It looked like somebody came out of nowhere and just depleted him There's another one, TJ, you gotta find He had almost the exact same one Where it's like a foley in his hands And he just goes like No, you have it Come on, Mince!

Backward somersault Are we doing Mince again? Yes, we are I will, he's not, but we are Did you see the clip this morning? No, yeah, we gotta see You told me about this I don't know I think I'm the only one that finds it as funny as i do but he had uh clemmer on to make an announcement and he couldn't hear clemmer but he reacted to

the announcement anyway even though clemmer didn't say the announcement wait did he know that no he already knew the announcement yeah yeah so that was that was his gloves halfway through there oh i just backwards like how i truly backwards so he's he's on the he's not using the sticky side but like how the sticky side i refuse to believe he's from yeah he's from louisiana i think i think you could i think you could go back in time and give those to a cave person and they'll put them on with the sticky side on the inside yeah yes it's almost instinct of the rat race and a living legend in my mind i gotta say clemmer one of my favorite barstool thank you wow that's very very kind of you i appreciate it how are you doing buddy how's the morning going yeah ever since clemmer and I had our Yak Pro Challenge, we're tied in forever,

and we always will be. And I had so much fun being on the rat race with Clemmer in Chicago. It was his third one. White Sox Dave and I were able to win it, and so I think we might be getting an invite back. But, Clemmer, breaking news on Wake Up Mitzi. What you got for us? He doesn't have his headphones on. Can you hear me?

Can you hear me, Mincey? That's awesome! You can hear me? I'm from the important! That's awesome! He doesn't even have his headphones on. That's awesome! This is great.

Who is that, Shrek? You got Rat Race. The first three were so successful, It's awesome. This is great. What? Who is that, Stratton? We got Rat Race. The first three were so successful, you're getting a fourth one. He put up five fingers. Minsky, can you hear me at all? I'm trying to speak in sign language here. Wait, did he put up five fingers for fourth? He did.

It's awesome. It's awesome. Minsky can not hear me. It's awesome. This is fantastic. You should be. Mincy can not hear me. It's awesome. This is fantastic. You should be able to hear me, Mincy. He's just... And then he's just...

This is... Mincy's calling me. Is he? A real subtle... Okay, I don't know what's going on, and I can't hear you, so I got you on speaker. All right. Can other people hear me, Mincy? Yes.

Other people can hear you. Moody's got... Everybody can hear can hear you i can't because something's wrong with my headset so classic wake up mitzi moment so i was trying to like talking to you and i'm trying to read what you're saying i can't so i was like screw it i'll just call i like how you pretended i like how you pretended the announcement was awesome even though i didn didn't make it. That was good acting. I appreciate it. Yeah, I was like, you know what? We're just going to call him. And, yeah, people could hear you.

All right, let's start this over. Clemmer, you're the man. We've gotten to know each other through our pro day. Well, he heard you. All right. $2,500 on the Yaks. That was one of my favorite Yaks ever. Rat Race, you've done three of them.

You did two in New York. Oh of my favorite acts ever. Rat Race. You've done three of them. Oh my god. How's he alive? How is he alive? Makes no sense. That's awesome. He lives like someone's grandmother is controlling him with a computer keyboard.

He's trying to play play he's like remember that game the she just mashing button qo TSA yeah what yeah you op where you try to get the guy to run that's it grandmother doing that my body yeah looking random shit and his body falling for scams apart yeah it's impossible god it's impossible he was at dinner last night you know um yeah this game this is mincey it's a grandmother controlling it that's it but this is on the way to do a task

that most people can do in their sleep yeah that's perfect i don't know like this is trying to like lick it it looks crazy oh this is the hardest game ever That should actually be a Jerry After Dark Yeah, that'd be funny It's so hard There we go, Teej Gamer Oh, he drops the punt Well, you haven't been on here since

the beer games, I don't think At least I haven't seen you since then, how'd that go? All's well that ends well? yeah yeah we had a great time yeah it was a good time i we had a great time i mean we we learned a valuable lesson to never podcast that drunk yeah yeah that was a mistake but everything else was great and I'm excited for next year's. Yeah. You're invited. Yeah, did anybody drink 22 beers in under two hours at the beer game? In under what? In under two hours. Yeah, you missed the Royal Rumble case race, which you would have loved, Will.

Yeah. Which will be a year of anything. You guys looked like you guys had a blast on that Royal Rumble. You'll be here next year for it. I want to say it was 16 in under an hour. Hmm. That sounds horrible. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, it was 16 in under an hour hmm that sounds horrible yeah yeah it was it was yeah we gotta we gotta figure out the uh the amount of fluid situation yeah it was horrendous i my body felt like it was breaking you're so right dude about the case race though that uh

i think enough time has passed that i i now am yeah i'm not itching for it right now but i'm like if you if you're like well we should do one like next month i'd be like yeah that'd be fun yeah you go in waves and then you and then you get like yeah the first like two months after i was i'm never yeah drink it again never drink it again and the second phase would be like i want to do one yeah like i'm excited badly this is gonna be fucking this is gonna be fucking legendary yeah Yeah. Cannot wait to do this. We're in the phase where if someone pushed us, we would do it. Yeah, I don't want to do it.

I don't want to do it, but I could be talked into it. Yeah, you have to come to the Royal Rumble next year. Have to. It was so much fun. Is it going to be the same time? Yeah, probably. Yeah, we'll do it probably spring. When's the next case race?

Do you have any clue? If I had to guess, there probably would be one in february and then one in like early summer two a year sounds about right yeah anything more than that well and also we've been toying around with the idea of doing for the thousandth yak doing a week where we can't end the act so we drink a thousand beers can't end the yak until you drink a thousand beers the week yeah we can't we have to we have to drink a thousand beers over the course of a week i'm good for like 20 so you're just locked in here yeah i mean we could go home and stuff we're talking about maybe just sleeping here but

we yeah i don't think we can go home for i don't think we can go yeah friday i don't think you can go home i think we have to spend ourselves alcoholism or if you do the rule has to be the whole team is has to be present to start yeah because then if you allow people to go home like they might not make it back yeah this idea might not be a good idea no it's it's a good idea. What's the minimum amount of total views we would need for it to be worth it? 1.5. Yeah. More than a million.

Yeah. I did say more than a million. He got you there. I was thinking... You just wanted me... 10 million. Oh, shit. 10 million?

Yeah, along those lines. Well, you can't have it leaning on my foot. You can't kick it into my chest. Well, it was on top of my... You kicked it into my fucking chest. I didn't mean it. I didn't mean it. It's foot. You kicked it into my chest. It was on top of my fucking chest. I didn't mean it. I didn't mean it. It's okay.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No, like that's like a week of – No, because like what would that – Is that much different than one million? Yes. Is that going to change my life? You know what that would do to your body and your mind?

Yeah. Like a toll? A thousand beers. Yeah. It's a lot a lot yeah it's more my you're right KB that's more mental than anything else definitely more you'd be a broken man because you just broke hungover cause I bet it's equally physical 1,000 beers you'd have no space in between hungover or drunk yeah well there would Well, two weeks after probably would be like genuine withdrawal. Yeah. Oh, would we become alcoholic?

I think so. I think so. Yes. Do you feel normal again? Every day drinking. So I think mentally your brain would have a chemical dependency. We should do it. We should do it.

We should do it. Could it be beers? Could it be a thousand of something else? I think it has to be beers. What do you want it to be? Hunchups? Yeah. We could just do it with a bigger group of people. Yeah. I don't know.

No, I don't think you can. Oh, fuck, we can't. Oh, wow, Compton. It's Will Compton Day. It is Will Compton Day. Brandon, do the Shady Rays ad. Give me the Shady Rays ad. I'll give you the Shady Rays ad. Do that Shady Rays ad.

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Compton. Compton. Well, that's – You'd have to do with – Hey, Will. That's 20 – Will. It's impossible.

You mind if I read the ad, Will? No, go ahead. I was whispering over here. No, you weren't whispering. Whisper into the mic more. The microphone was right beside you. Whisper in the mic then. Shady Rays has partnered with Barstool Sports to bring you a new lineup of premium polarized

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He walked in and stood behind me and started like... Our ribbon cutter is here. I thought, yeah, I don't know. No, and then Will pointed at his crotch. He was standing right, I just looked at the TV and he was standing behind me like he was going with his dick out or something. No, I was pointing at the seat. Oh, I didn't see the seat.

That's why I was like pointing to my shirt. All right. Our ribbon cutter is here. It's Will Compton Day. Dave, are you ready to cut this ribbon? Yeah. Everybody's giving a speech, Dave, about me. Do you have one?

No, I didn't know that. Well, let's hear it. What? Oh, you said no. I said I didn't have a speech. All right. You said you didn't have one. Come off the top. And then you said, let's hear it what oh you said no i i said i didn't have a speech it's clear as day he said oh we do it now you mean yeah yeah let's hear what you got from the heart i like will nice good start speech oh that's it yeah. I like him. Do you like him more or less than when you first discovered him? Ooh. I didn't really know him when I first gas found him,

and then we didn't talk too much in the beginning, right? Yeah. I don't know when we started interacting. Is right now the most you've liked him? That's a good question. Yeah, he's high up there. Like, yeah. I like him. Here we go. Here we go. All go all right all right that's huge what about when he called you pizza boy didn't bother me yeah he loved it

he texted me right after he said this is how we win did i say that he's like i love you fired up this is how we win yeah no i i we haven't had too many bad moments. No. Look at that, Will. We'll count the day. All right, so I have a video prepared for you before we go to the museum. Okay. Would you like to see it?

Would love to. Okay, so TJ, let's play the video, and then we will. So how it will work is me, Dave, and Will will go to the museum. You guys will be able to watch the whole thing. Will will give a speech. We'll do a tour of the museum. And then, yeah, we'll eat some chili and peanut butter sandwiches. Yeah.

Is there going to be a ceremonial first shit or anything? Yeah. There should be. There's some. Yeah. Try to work something. Do that. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. Let's see the video. Real confident. If you want to put something out. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Let's see the video. Real confident. If you want to put your headphones in. You know him as an undersized. Oh, Will, you're not a tiny-ass cop. Low IQ.

Sci-fi. Yes or no? Unreliable man. It happens that it is also scheduled. That is the time that it doesn't trigger a turn. But long before he was soft as baby shit. Oh, that's bad. Got the old blood tape on there, huh? Will Compton was scampering all over southeast Missouri.

He later took his talents to Lincoln, becoming the heart of Nebraska's 2012 defense. Yet when the NFL wrote him off, Will did it right back. The boy they called Scrimp took an opportunity as an undrafted free agent and turned it into a nine-ish year NFL career with many highlights. So today, we honor the small dickdicked, once-crooked-toothed man, and we kick it off with a few fine folks that would like to say a couple words. When I recruited Will Compton out of Bonterre, Missouri, I always knew he was destined for greatness.

He had a phenomenal career at Nebraska, 10 years in the NFL. Volontaire, Missouri. Always knew he was destined for greatness. He had a phenomenal career at Nebraska. Ten years in the NFL. I don't know what's better, to have a gold jacket in Canton, Ohio, or a bathroom shrine in Chicago. Will Compton is so full of you-know-what that it's only fitting that he should have a shitter shrine. Congratulations, Will. Bo Pelini here.

As you know, I was Will Compton's coach for four plus years in Nebraska. Every day I looked at him, I said to myself, someday this dude will have a bathroom dedicated to him. Or at least a toilet. Today I'm proven right. What's up, guys? This is Coach Vrabel. Currently with the Cleveland Browns.

But I had the luxury of coaching Will Compton in 2018. I was hired in Tennessee, and I said, to start this program, we need to sign playoff Willie. And guess what? That didn't happen the first year. So Will moved on, and a couple years later, we just had to have him back and made a playoff push, and we signed him back in 2020.

At that point in time, I knew his career was going to end up in the shitter, man. Congratulations. Congratulations. Wow. That was good. Well done. Beautiful. yeah wow that was good well done beautiful we got a few of your coaches

yeah I love that the Eckler story came up yeah I know I was like oh I don't know that name I had that video in my phone for a while

yeah they all were were pumped to to reach out and send a video I love it I appreciate it should we do it? let's do it

alright here we go. The Will Compton Museum. Oh, boy. Good luck, boys. Good luck, guys. All right, there they go. Did you guys still in your chairs believe we were all going? Yes.

100%. I did feel as if I was a part of this. I believe we were all part of this, and then we were told just now that we're not. That was a quick non-invite. Yeah. It was very casual. I accepted it quick.

I just kind of slid it in there right there. It was decisive as hell. By the way, you guys aren't invited at all. So, yeah, let's just get this thing going. That's fine. No, it was fun to plan. Yeah. Yeah.

No, we participated in most of it. There they go. They're in the bathroom. Pretty great, huh? Yeah, it's pretty great. Wow. It's grand old, baby. Austin even made it. There they go. They're in the bathroom. Pretty great, huh? Yeah, it's pretty great. Wow. It's grand old, babe. Austin even made it.

Yeah. And Luckman, too. The sign came out great. Yeah. World's largest Wilcoxon Museum. All right, so which camera are we looking at?

This one? All right, so here we go. Oh, they got the big sizzling. Do you want to say anything before? I'm very proud for the first dedication of a bathroom to Wilcoxon. Well earned, well deserved the big sizzling. Do you want to say anything before? I'm very proud of the first dedication of a bathroom to Will Compton. Well earned, well deserved.

Wow. Yeah! Hey! I'm so happy. Let's check it out. Ready? Let's check. Oh, it's towards the pressure.

Wow! A lot of stuff. Look, here, we'll start here. We'll start here. So we have the Will Compton, number one locker room guy. Three interceptions in his career. Get inside the door.

The sack picture didn't come out great. It's really just a shoulder of Sam Bradford there. He's going down. And then we have facing you when you take a shit. Here, come on in, Cody. You have the Will Compton misspelled shit. Here, come on in, Cody. You have the Will Compton misspelled jersey. Yeah, Dana Beers. Shout out to Dana.

Dana Beers. We have this one from his second NFL game. Wow, it looks great in there. That's the one that started this whole thing. And then we have to chill with Chels. This one, you might wonder what, yeah, that one, yeah.

I got inside sources, I got this one. Brable? No. One of your guys. Maybe, oh, he's from a shop. Maybe you should have bought him a truck. Maybe you should have bought him a truck. Now he's me, now he's my guy.

Okay, and then I bought this one. What cost was that one? It's like 300 bucks. Nice. Now he's my guy. Okay. And then I bought this one. How much was that one? Uh, it's like 300 bucks. Nice. Awkward timing. Oh, shit. Oh, no. Um, yeah, I couldn't really hold it any longer. Oh, no.

Oh, my God. We'll get the rest of it. This is the very first one. Oh, no. That's a very hard one. That's good, man. That's... I'm sorry.

I think I'm gonna take a shit. Dude, you can gonna take a shit. I think it's a vice rush. Oh! Really nice decor in here. Yeah. It's just a waste. It was a bad time. What's he gonna do? I don't know. I think he had those for the popcorn machine. What do you think? It's really nice, huh?

Oh, it's amazing. It's brilliant. Came out better than I thought. He's going. All right, this is a nice little wheelchair. It's a handicap, so. Yeah. But you gotta be aching my jamb, right? No.

It's good. It's good strength. Yeah. It's really strong. Hold it for a long time. Yeah. First this and then. Yeah, yeah. World Comedy Museum. You give it back already. Yeah.

You see it's even back. Yeah. Look at that. You like the San Francisco? Love it. Only got it, only got it shoulder to the right. I apologize. We got space for a war stop.

As we have. Yeah. We got a lot of space. We got a lot of space. We got a lot of space. We got a lot of space. We got a lot of space. We got a lot of space. We got a lot of it. Only got a shoulder to the right. We got space for a war stop. As we have.

I'll start at the tip. Sorry guys. No problem. Have a good one. Sorry. All right, you can go. Strong claws for somebody. Okay.

Probably works strong. Strong claws for somebody. All right, so, and then we have, yeah, this. Oh, paralyzed? Two grand. Or no, it's 300 bucks. That's one of the vice-requisites. That one.

Yeah. Jack sold me out with that one. Well, you should have bought him a Chevy. No. Yeah, you should have. You should have bought him a Chevy. No. Yeah, you should have. You should have bought him a Chevy. That's a good lesson. That's something about Jack.

It's a good lesson. It's a good comfort. Yeah, all right. So, speech? I would love to. Okay, all right. So, let's hear it. Why don't you come up this side, Cody?

You want to go maybe over here? I can't wait to go there one day. Wait, I'll hold the door. Can we get Dave in here? Yeah, can we get Dave in here? Yeah, can we get Dave in here? Yeah, can we get Dave in here? Yeah, can we get Dave in here? Yeah, can we get Dave in here? Yeah, can we get Dave in here? Yeah, can we get Dave in here? Yeah, can we get maybe over here? I can't wait to go there one day. Wait, I'll hold the door.

Can we get Dave in here? Yeah, can we get Dave back in here? He left. Dave's in Miami. Dave left. He left? I was in. Jacob.

Good work. So he's waiting? He did do a good job of cutting the ribbon. I'm glad he showed up. Yeah, this is important. So he can put his phone on it? So he can put nothing on it? It looks really nice. It looks so nice! Wait, yeah, there's a phone. He's not gonna fall off of that now.

Should I go? Uh, you wanna? Yeah, why don't you? Is he going to the bathroom? Is he gonna shit? Oh, that's so awesome. Oh, he's... This is the first pee by Will Compton in the Will Compton Museum.

He left? It's better to play the farm than you do. Cut the ribbon. Good stream. It feels way more permanent than I thought it would. Yeah, it's good. I thought we'd throw some shit up there and fall apart after a few weeks. Good stream.

Good strong. Let's stick around for a while. I might start drizzling at the end. Don't worry. Okay, all right. I'm going to start drizzling at the end, but don't worry. Here comes the drizzle. Drizzling or dribbling?

I think it could be either. Can I get some chili? Drizzle is when you put something on top of something. You're putting piss on top of the toilet? More piss. Second wind. Oh, you got more? Second wind.

Wow. Third one. I should probably get my colon checked. Your colon for peeing? That's a good joke. It's prostate. Yeah, you did it. No, it's all fine.

My colon's good. Oh, that's good. Oh, it's wiping the seat. You piss on the seat. Are you going to do a speech or not? Wait, yeah, what about a speech? Yeah, he's washing his hands. Dave's coming.

Oh, they want you back in the bathroom. I'm going to do a wash. That's too much. What's he doing? That's a lot. That's absurd. That's absurd. Really good watch. You're walking here for a speech. My speech? Oh. He's really good watch. You want to hear my speech? Oh. I'm just going to do a speech.

Okay. Come on, Corey. Come here. Get over here. Oh, okay. As a kid who grew up diabolically waiting to bed until I was 14 and chasing the dream of one day playing in the NFL, never did I imagine that I'd be forever etched into the game that I love inside of four walls that is now known as the Wilcoxon Museum.

We didn't grow up with much. My mom was an elementary school teacher. My dad commuted over an hour of work to each day. We had three bedrooms and one bathroom that split amongst the five of us. And as a young kid, I wasn't allowed to drink Kool-Aid until after 7 p.m. What? What? That doesn't make sense.

What type of rule is that? I don't care about how you get into school. Push us to be ambitious, think big, and build a character that we'd be proud of. That's what this museum represents. Not a shit will go down the toilet without a selfless effort. Not a pee will be had unless it is hydrated. But when you step foot in this bathroom, you must let go of the illusion of control. Because the rational pottyty goer adapts himself to the bull while the irrational potty goer expects the bull to adapt to him. Thank you to my parents, my wife, Big Cat, Dave Portnoy, Bo Pelini, Mike Shanahan, Jay Gruden, Mike Vrabel, John Gruden, and Rich Passaccia for making this moment possible.

Without leadership like that behind me, today doesn't happen. God bless our troops, God bless America, and God bless the morning too. Go Big Red. That was beautiful. That was really beautiful. That was incredible speech. My legs were shaking. Great speech. Great speech. They've had to come back for that.

Great museum. It's there forever. I thought we'd be in there with them. Yeah. That was touching. Looks awesome. Yeah. I'm going to go get my beer.

I'm going to go get my beer. I'm going to go get my beer. I'm going to go get my beer. I'm going to go get my beer. I'm going to go get my beer. I'm going to go get my beer. I'm going to go get my beer. I'm going to go get my beer. I'm going to go get my beer. I'm going to go get my beer. I'm going to go get my beer. It's there forever I thought we'd be in there with them Looks awesome

We should all go one day Do we have to make reservations? I'd imagine They also have chili They've been fed We don't have anything That's awesome They have a special bond now that we don't.

Another whisper in his mouth. Yeah. Sharing inside jokes from the bathroom. Laughing at the whisper. That was stunning. Oh, stunning. Fantastic. Great speech.

We thought we'd get invited, but that's... Well, you guys can go see the museum. It's a small bathroom. It's pretty roomy, though. Yeah. Yeah. It's a nice bathroom. man i'll pass on the peanut butter but no come on you guys did you could hear us explaining all the things in the back yeah it

was an amazing yeah it was like i was there it was acoustically funny not great no the flushes sounds and the lack of expressions and well were you suspicious of the wheelchair guy because you you said he's got great quads for someone in a wheelchair yeah yeah i don't know i still feel that way well what do you think it came out how you imagined it better oh i love to hear that thank god you guys made my day oh i love that i feel like it should be more than making your day yeah maybe a year made my year okay cool yeah i tried i offered uh i called bo pollini i was like this is crazy but would you fly out

he's like uh i was all right, just a video. That's fine. That video kind of choked me up a little. Yeah. That was a good video. It really did. It kind of got me going. An actually good video, yeah.

It was almost too heartwarming, like in the design of the museum. I started to feel bad. And it was also just very funny reaching out to the most alpha male leader of men and being like, hey, can you send me a selfie video saying congrats to Will for having a museum in a bathroom? Well, the first coach didn't want to cuss. He said, you're full of you-know-what, so he knew you'd always end up in the shitter. That's good writing.

You don't say the same thing twice. You used to write. I did for a long time. You would have done the same. That's the guy who you puked on his floor yeah eckler yep got it got it this is good shit will yeah the peanut butter and chili is really good it's perfect uh first day of football meal wow i feel like it's a good fall meal that it's here like football is here yeah you guys can go and take a look at it if you want well Well, we weren't among the first wave, so.

Go ahead, Brandon. Go, Brandon. No. Go take a look at it. You should see it. It's good. Go take a picture for me. You were just there.

I know. I didn't take a picture of the museum. I do feel like a gift shop would be necessary. Yeah, you're right. A gift shop would be good. We could work on that. Like a gumball machine? Maybe a small cafe. Like the Cracker Barrel Crystal Rock Candy? Yeah. That would be good. We could work on that. Like a gumball machine? Like the Cracker Barrel Crystal Rock Candy?

Yeah. That'd be cool. I'd love that. This food's going to make me want to shit in that museum. There should be some benches if you want to sit and observe. That's the thing. The beauty is that that is now the museum, and it's never going to change, so we're just going to add to it.

I don't know if you heard this part, Will, but I think i'm going to try to work it into uh the lease with our landlord that if we ever vacate this place that has to stay so now are you finished uh accumulating no not add the whole time oh no no no no it's just the beginning i'm hoping by next year's wilcompton day that thing is just like not a single free space open and it's just will's the story of will's life i i wouldn't hate it if your dad was able to see it maybe get him up here i bet we could yeah we can get him up here you like bill i i everything you tell me about him yeah i'd love him you guys you guys would love bill yeah we'd like swap out the toilet seat from the one you used growing up or something. Oh.

Stuff like that. Take it to that level. Wow. Take it to that level. Take it to that level. Take it to that level. It would be cool to show your daughter, but men's room. Yeah. Yeah.

But. And we are strictly. No. That's strictly binary. We don't know what she's going to be yet. Yeah. Kate's not allowed in. Oh, no.

Oh, no. Oh, my God. Kate. I don't have a camera. Oh, no. No. Oh, my God. I don't have a camera. Hey, Hank. Yeah, there's no camera. Hank, can you ask Donnie for more peanut butter sandwiches? Wow. And chili.

What? We're eating. I just didn't get any. Oh, yeah. Well, we need some. How many did you eat? A lot. Oh, you're saying?

Yeah, yeah. I mean, I think that was the plate for all of us. Everyone, yeah. There's five on there, but they were cut in half. Yeah, so there would be more. Yeah, five halves. Yeah, that one's on me. Hand up. It's your day. It's your day.

It's your day. It's your fucking day. Why is this peanut butter sandwich cut into smaller pieces? The exact number on the plate has people in the room. Mark's like, hey, can I get one of those? Yeah, go ahead. Dave loved it. Dave was giggling during the speech.

Yeah. He was having a good time. Good speech. He was enjoying the hell out of it. Oh, let's go. Can we get? Yeah, we need some more for the fellas. What's that one got?

I accidentally ate too many. All right, yeah. You're going to snag that one up. Maybe some more chili, Donnie. That's a good one. I did, yeah. I'm going to take it. Yeah, that's a good one right there.

It's amazing in there. Yeah. It's good ambiance. Yeah. That's great ambiance. Good lighting. Shout out to Caitlin and Jacob. They were here. We were here at 8 a.m. putting it all together. yeah it's good ambience yeah that's great ambience good lighting caitlin shout out caitlin and jacob they were here we were here at 8 a.m putting it all together they did a great job it just feels

like you're you're part of history when you're there yeah i like the plant we're so good i should have done that pants off if I really was a go-getter. No, that's fine. Yeah, the plant kind of brings it all together. That was Caitlin's touch, a female touch in there. Eventually, I wouldn't mind seeing corn stalks. Ooh. There we go. Grow our own corn.

Yep. But it can't leave the stall, right? Yeah. It's not a bathroom. No, no, no. Yeah, it can't. It's a corn maze to get to the toilet. Yeah, yeah.

You walk in and you have to. That's pretty cool. Will, you have the biggest game of your life on Saturday. Yeah, we do. You have to beat Colorado. I know. If you don't beat Colorado, you're back to where you are. Yes.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, you're 100%. This is the biggest game we've had in Lincoln, Nebraska in over a decade. A lot of hype. A lot of hype based off the way Dylan Rayola performed. Are you going to take Nebraska? I think Colorado's a live dog.

Oh, no. I think it'll be close. I think it's going to be close. Yeah, I know you think so. Because we already talked about it. He thinks Nebraska wins, but he's going to take Colorado to cover. I think it's a close game. Very close game. I'm it's a close game. Very close game.

Yeah. I'm rooting for you, Will. Where are you putting your money? Probably over. Just the over? Yeah. It's an easy – yeah, yeah, yeah. Listen, I want you to win, but –

I want to know who's riding, though. But if I took Nebraska and they win and don't cover, I'll be mad at you, and I don't want that to become – But I would understand that. You know what I mean? Yeah, but I don't want that. Like, if you get –. You know what I mean? Yeah, but I don't want that. Hey, you're a foxhole guy. I am. You claim to be.

Are you trying to get in the hole with me? No. You're not going to come in his hole? That's the least you could do. You should come in my hole this Saturday. Yeah, I'd probably come in your hole. Minus seven and a half. I'll come in your hole. That's beautiful. I'm going to come in your hole. Minus seven and a half. I'll come in your hole.

That's beautiful. That's what I need. I'm going to come in your hole. Although Saturday will not be Wilcompton Day. That's true. So. If you were playing the game right now, I'd come in your hole. How about we switch?

You can take the shirt off, and I'd rather have you for Saturday. Wear this shirt on Saturday? You want a second Will Compton day? No, no, no, no, no, no. I just want – You just want me – I need my guys. We'll talk Saturday morning.

I need my guys on Saturday. We're going to be in Ann Arbor. You'll be there. Yeah. So we're going to have the college football show live from Ann Arbor. Excited? Yeah. We go to Ann Arbor every third week, yeah.

We go all the fucking time. What was that? We go all the goddamn time to Ann Arbor every third week, yeah. We go all the fucking time. What was that? We go all the goddamn time to Ann Arbor. But why wouldn't you? Corrupt university, piece of shit people. It's a fair point. Yeah, but also, it's still, I mean, college football show. Yeah.

National champ. National champion. It's not even the game, but, well, you would say it's not even the game of the week, though. So why aren't they in Lincoln? Yeah, I would argue that Colorado and Nebraska will be. Yeah, you were just arguing the other side. Well, I was just saying. Trying to get you back on track, Will, that this is the bigger game.

Can you give some to Will? You'd rather be in Lincoln. Oh, thank you. I would rather be in Lincoln. I'd rather be in Lincoln Continental than in Auburn. There he is. This is an incredible snack. What's up?

So good. Oh, I can't. Celiac. Celiac. Gluten. Yeah, it's a bummer. But I bet it's good. Look at this.

I just got chili on my shoe because of Will Compton Day. You're not wiping out with a Will Compton Day t-shirt. Sure am. Yep. Thank you. Oh, Donnie, I'll take more. So good. Same.

It's very good chili. Very good chili, yeah. Very good chili, Donnie. The perfect amount of spice to it. Are you cool sharing Will Compton Day with Freddie Mercury's birthday? Is that what today is? It's Freddie Mercury and the guy that said

the slur on the Red Sox birthday. Which? Yeah, I guess I have to know. Yeah, why not? Duran. Duran. Duran. I don't know about yours.

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All right. All right, good read. This has been... Ooh, a great day. It's been the best Will Compton day I can remember. Really has been awesome. Until next year. Yeah, until next year.

Sure, sure. Second annual Will Compton day will almost certainly be better than the first. What do you think you'll be like this time next year? Oh, man. I just think me and I'll probably be full time on the rewatchables by that point. Yeah. Me and Simmons will be kicking it. And, I don't know, Fantasy and all the guys over there at the ringer,

I think it'll be a good time. Yeah. I think I'll be really good. What new health problem do you think you'll have this time next year? Oh, I'm definitely going to, as I walk more and I do all this stuff, I'm going to tear a muscle or something. As you walk? I'm going to destroy my back. Yeah. As you walk? Destroy my back.

Just walking. I have a future on pacemaker. Pacemaker? There's not really a history of heart trouble in my family. I guess I just flush my money down the drain. I do anticipate vision loss at some point. Glasses or blindness? Glaucoma is in the family.

He starts smoking weed. Ganja. My dad did that, but it led right to meth. That's a side effect of diabetes, isn't it? Not meth. Usually diabetes and meth don't go hand in hand. How fast was your dad from weed to meth? Oh, in seconds. Okay.

Oh, seconds. Seconds, yeah. That's a big ass gateway. And this weed is good. It needs some meth. It was weed to cocaine, and then it was cocaine to meth, I believe. Okay. That was the road, yeah.

Cocaine to meth is an interesting one. Well, he would hide his cocaine in my Snoopy tackle box. Oh. Did you ever find your dad's blow? Oh, yeah. No kidding. Yeah. Yeah, that was sugar for the fish.

Wow. That's. Yeah. But it's what I'm saying. No one suspects it in this snoopy it was it was brilliant and nobody nobody ever found it well except for me and some very very energetic fish all right so what will anything else you want to do today you want to you gotta do the gauntlet yeah you gotta do the gauntlet. Yeah, you got to do the gauntlet. Oh, yeah. Belly full of chili. Hello. Yeah.

And peanut butter sandwiches. Feeling good. Should we do the gauntlet? Yeah. You want to do the gauntlet? Let's do the gauntlet. All right. Is the gauntlet sponsored, TJ? Proper Wild.

Proper Wild is the gauntlet or- That's the wheel. Wheel. Ah. What's your best time, Will? You've done this a few times. Yeah. Twice? Twice. I want to? You've done this a few times. Twice? Twice.

I want to say I have no clue. Up for three minutes. That's what I was thinking too. Oh, Malasek brought his dog in today. Poor thing. Why did... Oh, it's Jerry's new thing Yeah we're gonna take pro football football show We're gonna be

Oh he's on it Oh we gotta beat it Let's go You gotta beat this Will And now the The football's harder now Just so you know Kyle what's across your penis

But we'll help Brandon will get your rebounds What's the black bar You have a black's across your penis? But we'll help. Brandon will get your rebounds. What's the black bar? You have a black bar on your penis? Yeah, it's just the brand tag. Oh. Yeah. So what's the time we got to beat?

Four minutes, seven seconds. All right, we got to beat this. He will. Malsec, put on a Will Compton shirt. God damn. What are you goddamming? Chili, every time I have it. Oh, you already shit?

No, I think it's so good. Oh. Yeah, I thought so. It's the best. It's the best. I think it's like the Goo Goo Dolls of food. A little bit soft, but always satisfying. And if you had it in the rain in Buffalo, that's when it's the best.

Goddamn. Would you assign a band to every food? That would be a good show. I could do that. I could do that. I don't know bands too well, though. You do. Let's do this together.

Yeah. You and I should do a show together, dude. There we go. Chili. What food would you assign to the red hot chili peppers? That's tough. Uh-huh. I don't know enough about them.

It's not a red hot chili. No, it certainly isn't. But I think there is a band that could be a red hot chili pepper. Red hot chili peppers. What do you think? What food would they be? Yeah. Mashed potatoes.

Are they a little bit edgy? A little bit. I think mashed potatoes. Like a spicy mashed potato? Everybody can find a... They'd just be a potato. Everybody can find a form of it they'd like. Are you sure about that?

What is it? Red Hot Chili Peppers. Red Hot Chili Peppers? I think anybody can find a Red Hot Chili Peppers song that they like. That's a band I pretended to love, but just knew the... Sort of feels like you're calling them bland. Shit, yeah, they're not. Yeah, it's Stephen Jay's favorite band.

Metallica is Stephen Jay's favorite band. Stephen Jay, what's your favorite band? Band? Oh. See? That's what it was. What? It drives me insane.

Band? Oh, I was wrong. I stand for it. Yeah, Red Hot Chili. I owe you an apology. Band? Huh? It's impossible.

Trying to understand the question. What about nachos? What is my favorite band? What about nachos? Trashy, but who is like... Right place, right time. Sublime? A kid rock that's better.

Yeah. A better kid... Solime A kid rock that's better Yeah A better kid So a trashy band That's That's like actually Kind of intellectual That has a high hit rate That can write

And perform well And that's so good When you're fucked up Yeah Like 2am nachos Yeah Nothing hits like it Yeah I'm trying to

There's There's gotta be an option here What band is like Amazing during the day But at at 2 a.m. Oh, yeah, sorry. We were talking about bands. I love it. The loaded nacho of bands.

Okay. This could be good. You ready? I don't want to force this. We've got to think some more. You ready, TJ? Hootie and the Blowfish? Yes, sir.

All right, here we go. Not bad. Three, two, one, go. I don't think he wants it. What are we doing, Will? Pick up multiple bags. There we go. There it is.

He's going really slow. Toe. Is it his right toe? Right big toe? Yes. Yeah, I. Is it his right toe? Right big toe? Yes. Oh. Yeah, I think it's his right toe. Oh.

Oh, what a shot. Stay back there, Brandon. Oh. Oh. Holy shit, Will. Maybe we just suck at the football? That could very well be it. Paul Skeens and Will just did it in the second try.

Yeah, guys that have gone pro. Yeah. Pro athletes. No, that can't be it. The football player and the guy who throws things were really good at it. Shot's looking pretty nice. It's just not going in. Yep, yep, yep.

Will's issue will always be the sport goal. We should make a Will Compton sport goal. I bet you he wouldn't get them all. No chance. But I don't know if I would pass trivia on my life. Wide back room Nebraska. I think D-Lo did that to him in the dozen. My niche in the dozen all-star game was Will Compton

because Will Compton was on my team. And Will didn't know, so he tried to call Taylor. But he forgot that he saved, for like a fake screenshot, he saved his own number as Taylor. So he called himself. Oh, we got to play that. We got to play that. Play after this.

Play what? We got to play that clip. That's an all-time moment. Yeah. There it is. And I think Lenny got the question right. All right. All right. Alright. Alright.

Eight oldest NFL franchises? Marshmallows. Okay, alright. Alright. You do you. A-L-L-O-W-S? Oh no, TJ. Marshmallows. Yeah. Hershey's Chocolate. Graham Cracker. That's a gimme. That is huge. Damn near. McDonald's characters. Oldest, oldest. That's a gimme. That is damn near.

McDonald's characters. Oldest. McDonald's characters. The Hamburglar. My man. Ronald McDonald. What? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

He's not OG? He's not spelling it right. Oh. Oldest NFL franchises. This should be easy. Currently active. Green Bay Packers. Kansas City Chiefs.

Raiders. Where are we at right now? Where are we at right now? Chicago Bears. Go. Washington. Dallas. Dallas.

Go Jets. Rams. 49ers. Motherfucker. Eagles. Yeah Yeah there we go Patriots I don't think so Bills

Good input I'll help him with the football Giants Yes Wait was it the last time 1957 Wasn't the most famous example of Kate helping New England? Yeah.

It was literally New England. So once again, New England trips her up. Way to go, Will. Needed that. Yeah, 357. Good job, Will. 357 is in a needed it territory. No, he needed under four.

Yeah, he had to break four. With a toe. Yeah. Roger Bannister moment for you. Broke four minutes. I was getting caught on basketball, man. Your shot looked okay. Oh, and you beat Taylor.

Wow. Oh, my God. What a day. Look at that. Because you guys hate each other. Hang on now. I'm up. I'm up higher. Oh, yeah. TJj what are you doing oh yeah get him up there is that first page yeah no i i think it's second page oh no will said yeah yeah

yeah well we were reminiscing about the time you called yourself on the dozen. Yeah. Yeah. I do. I want to watch that clip. I do. Who was I trying to call? Taylor, I think.

Yeah. A lot of people said the gauntlet. Yeah. Kyle. Mark. I, what was that time? I thought it was higher. You just got that? Yeah, not too long ago, yeah. Gotcha.

Yeah. How often can you guys go? We don't really have a set tempo. Have you went since you got the big dog? Oh, yeah, a couple times. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we just go.

Category, and it is Will Compton. Who was the quarterback for the Titans on October 19, 2014, the first game Washington won with Will Compton as the starter? It was, man, he had long hair. He was joked around. He was called, like, Jesus or something. Charlie Whitehurst? Charlie Whitehurst?

Yeah, I think it might be Charlie Whitehurst, boys. Was he on the Titans? I believe so. It's Charlie Whitehurst or Mendenhunter. Do you want to call Taylor? Do you want to call Bray? Oh, yeah, that's a good call. We're going to call Taylor, Jeff.

All right, we're going to call Taylor Juan. Let's go. Just to double check. That sounded like a voicemail to me. Now I have the deleted message recovery feature. Oh, no. A deleted message recovery system. What's that mean? Double-check Deleted message recovery system. What's that mean? I think we'll just call. Oh, wait. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. I changed Taylor's name to my number Compton just used his phone-a-friend to call Will Compton.

On the least category. I know. We got it. I'm sorry. You ripped your phone-a-friend. All right, let's just call Charlie White. Go work, Glenn. Glenn got it. It was Charlie White, right?

We're on the dozen. Am I allowed to use it? Wait, now you ripped it. You got to hang up. You called yourself. I can't ask you if Charlie Rogers No He's trying to cheat Oh my god, I'm an idiot

Will, God bless you man You're the fucking best We love you Will We do, God bless you, man. You're the fucking best. We love you, Will. We love you. I love you guys, too, man. We do. We love you. Fucking love you, man.

We fucking love you, man. As a group, we love you. We fucking love you. And we now get you on Thursdays again. Yeah. It's football season. We're back. So he'll be back on Thursdays.

Who do you guys got tonight? That's a tie. That's an either or. That's a classic either or for me. Yeah? Titus, I'm not copying you. That's an either or that's classic either or for me yeah way uh titus i'm not copying you that's an either or could go both ways i said it was a really toss yeah really could yeah i don't know if you had to pick ah fuck i think you got to go ravens after they lost in the playoffs last year they got that hunger

they're gonna be running the ball a lot more. People are going to expect Jackson to be passing it, but he's going to be. Probably will, yeah. What does the data say for tonight? Chiefs, right? Is it Chiefs? No. Ravens. Oh. So that's a statistical model play.

Wow. Could say that. If the data had done scores this year, what would the score have been? Oh, good question. Is it on the ceiling? 23 to 14. Oh, Baltimore. Wow, 9.1.

Big Cat, are you tailing Kyle's non-fancy Chinese dinner bet? Give it to me. I want it so bad. I didn't even take that. Non-fancy Chinese dinner bet. Give it to me. I want it so bad. I didn't even take that. Non-fancy Chinese dinner bet. Yeah, it's likely in rice. No flowers to not score. No flowers.

No flowers. But I got some. Likely in rice? Yeah, we'll stick with that. Likely in rice? Okay. Yeah, I'll take it. But likely won't score.

Why not? Could. It's not a Chinese thing. I started a bunch of gauntlets. What do you mean? Like, that's how I'm going for the golden bag. Like, one for each time slot. Well, didn't you win big on Boston College?

I did. You bet a money one? So we got a nice base. I did. What? Yeah. Damn, you're sure? No I've lost a lot too But I just want that big win

So bad And you always look at Four or five leg touchdown parlays And you're like Every one of these is very realistic Right And the payout is $7,000 Yeah

So it's like the best feeling It's just like Fake optimism That just gets you so excited. The time slots is my favorite. Doing one a time slot. Yeah, that's one. Because it feels like, oh, I just need one of these eight games. Yeah, I know.

And then you win one. You're like, on to the next. Go into the next day excited. And it's going to be a blast. Yeah, we had one last year Jerry and I That was like five grand To win a hundred thousand

And we needed just Javante Williams In the night game Yeah I remember that Yeah But how much It was so great It was worth it

Exhilarating Yeah So much fun You go in parlays Or just I like parlays But I haven't So this weekend

I'm gonna do Nebraska to cover Nebraska to cover, Oregon to cover, and Tennessee to cover. What's wrong with that, Brandon? What's going to happen, Brandon? It's just three heavy favorites. It's just – I mean, it's a parlay.

I know it's a parlay, but I just, you know. It's like plus 587. It's not real football to you. You're going to smash the controller. I was just saying that. Three heavy favorites. Don't fucking –'t fucking i'm doing three god damn it do you not like will i like will fine i will's a super guy you don't do this you've been trying to make this a thing for like a week now. But you're acting like I'm doing Moneyline with those three. No, I'm simply saying right.

You're doing spreads. Yeah. I don't, like, I feel like Tennessee could be a sucker spot. I'm just trying to warn you. I'm not trying to say you're stupid. You know who was on North Dakota State Plus 10 last week? You? This guy. Yeah.

Oh, people are saying there's a grammatical error in the Wilcompton Museum. Fuck. What? Oh, no. Is it the Dana Beers jersey? No. What? It says Sacks.

He only had one. Well, no, because you haven't officially retired, have you? That's true. I do have empty frames. That's right. That's the move where you put the comma on national titles. Yeah. Sorry.

You're good. Yeah. I forgot you haven't officially retired. So I guess technically I can still get one. Earn your rest. We're okay. Wait, have you not officially filled out your retirement paperwork? Never fucking did.

I've never, yeah. I don't even know if that's a real thing. When you do it, will you retire in the bathroom? Signing your papers? Isn't it? Yeah, I mean, absolutely. I don't even know if that's a real thing. When you do it, will you retire in the bathroom signing your papers? Isn't it? Yeah, I mean, absolutely. I don't think so. Oh, you would probably know better than me.

I think you do have to sign something. I don't know, man. You definitely have to sign something. Yeah, you should know as well. If you want to go join another team, couldn't you just say, I'm retired? Psych. Now I'm going to go join them. Yeah, now I'm on the retired psych now i'm gonna go join yeah now i'm on the bronco i don't think you gotta sign them to be like oh he no you can't come back in not saying you can't come back in it's just saying you are you you are by yourself or out

you're willing to be you're you're out right you're retired yeah yeah does anyone own your rights no you don't know sci-fi question there yeah yeah what do you mean by right let me ask you a follow-up there what rights are we talking about oh man well comp today all right what do we got

anything on the prep sheet Steven That you're dying to tell us I wish Steven That would have been great If he had tweeted number two During the show Oh yeah wait

Should we go do that right now He's free too Can't tell you to work man Will asked you to Can you just That is my request For Wilcompton Day What is this?

Describe your bookmark. Correct. Physical bookmark. What is on it? You think we all have physical bookmarks? I use a Costco receipt. I read books all the time, but I never used a bookmark in my life. I just remember what page.

You remember what page? That's absurd. Well, you finished the chapter. Is that crazy? I'm with Brandon. Good question. I memorize the page. I'll dog ear, but I use a Costco. I don't dog ear.

That's insane. I just did it again. Great question, Chad. Great question. He can get us going. I crease the page. No, don't dog ear the page. Now you're devaluing the book.

The value is what you learn from the book. I'm with you, Brandon. I don't use bookmarks. Remember the page. You just shut it? I finish the chapter, and then you know you have a general idea of what chapter you finish. Brandon, that's insane. Go read.

I'm done reading. Oh, it's page 71? Okay. What book are you reading right now? You're Milwaukee? I'm still in Milwaukee, but I did just get a book about the making of a league of their own, so I'm excited about that. Wait, what page are you on right now? You're Milwaukee? I'm still on Milwaukee, but I did just get a book about the making of A League of Their Own, so I'm excited about that.

What page are you on, Milwaukee Brute? I'm on like 115. No, I'm on like 115. I'm on 115. You could just be saying a number. I am just saying a number because I'm actually on like 207, but I would have to see in relation to where the pictures are. I'm close to the pictures.

I'm on... Oh, there's nothing better than getting to where the pictures are. I'm close to the pictures. I'm on. Oh, there's nothing better than getting to the pictures. Yeah, I'm close to the pictures. Just like I finally am here. I'm almost to the pictures. We got to the pictures. Once you get to the pictures, the book is over. Yeah.

There's nothing worth reading in the back. You guys don't look at the pictures first? No, I like to save them. I like to learn about the guys and then look at the pictures. Yeah. In my book, we just found out he will not eat them with a mouse. He will not eat them in a house. Oh.

So I know that that's. Yeah. That's huge. When I jump back in. That's written by a doctor. Oh, you're smart as fuck. What did I call him? You called it Dr. Seuss novels.

Dr. Seuss novels. Shit. That hurt. shit that hurt a novelist dr seuss probably my favorite uh tj should we tease who's coming in tomorrow they posted a video yeah they they announced yeah they announced they kind of took it from us yeah so we might as well yeah a big A big one tomorrow. Who you got? Find out. You might want to stick around. You might want to. Yeah. Make sure you're sitting down.

Push the flight back. We're coming to the YAC this Friday. That's right. This Friday, we're coming to the YAC at 1 p.m. Eastern on all YAC Barstool sports channels. Thanks to Steven and Big Cat for making this possible. Sports, Chicago food. Is that Kurt Angle? Professional wrestling.

And we may even run the gauntlet. And I'm going to prove to Brandon that I really was at Costco. It's time to bring the boom. Oh, that's a threat. So don't miss AJ and Big Justice this Friday on the S. 1 p.m. Eastern on all Yak channels on Barstool Sports. We can't wait. It's going to be Yak channels on Barstool Sports. Yes. It's going to be a big boom.

Oh, yeah. Did he say he's going to blow this place up? That's a bomb threat. They got a boomer doing the museum. Yeah. That'll be the first kid to tour. Yeah. Should we all bring something in that can get. Well, we'll just start to be good.

So who is that? Is that the little Rizzler? That's not the Rizzler. The best way to describe it is we're in too deep. Yeah. And we can't get out of it. That's AJ and Big Justice. Yeah.

We're in a fucking quicksand of our own making. Yeah. Tomorrow is the finale of it. I'm just asking everybody be cool tomorrow. Everybody be chill. I can't promise that. Rizzler started school today. Oh, he did?

Oh, shit. Oh, look at that. Is that baby Rizzler? A second Rizzler has hit the top. Oh, wow. I love it. Look at that. What is that hat? What is that hat?

Setup. We make that hat? Is it Plan hat? Setup. Can we make that hat? Is it plan B? It might be a plan B. What is the hat? Two horseshoes intertwined? There's a second Rizzler. Go back to the first one.

I can't process how small the other boy is he must be I've seen the Rizzler yeah you're right he's pocket sized is there anything to put this into scale on the table right there oh the chair

but that looks like a tiny chair that's a bench right that's like one of those ones you put a little plant on. I can't get over the dimension. He's three steps high. The Rizzler looks like a 5'9 running back. Oh, the steps. The steps. He's barely above the steps. Three steps high. Well, he's smaller than one would have thought. Good for the Rizzler.

Great for the Rizzler. Yeah, back at school. Imagine what him going to school would like. He's going to be the most popular kid of all time. Yes. Ever. What'd you do over the summer? Became the most famous person on the internet? Yeah. I'm a star. Oh, our commercial came out, TJ?

Yep. Do you want to watch it? That was everyone getting in pads, remember? Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. Remember, I got in it, and I could only stay like 20 minutes because I had mostly. So they told me to move down.

I'm not in it. You're not in it at all? I doubt it. I can't imagine where I would be in it because they filmed it during Mostly Sports. I bet you you're on it. Which brand? This is DraftKings. You're one of the big guys.

You're going to be gambling. Yeah. Well, I wasn't. I don't know what to say really hell yeah three minutes to the biggest bet of our lives doesn't matter what sport it is the bets we need are everywhere around us

and that's why we use DraftKings everybody that's why because it's about the spread he wasn't even there wasn't we yeah Ronan the point did it in New York to 14 parlay hey about cash inlay. It's about cashing a win. It's about hitting the over. Because that's what betting is, people. The six inches between you and your phone. So when we bet,

we bet with DraftKings. The crowd is yours. Yeah! Oh, Big F's face. Oh, yeah, he's... Oh, yeah. Oh, that. Oh. That's amazing. They had to feed me line by line. It's a great commercial.

It turned out well. I was a baby being fed. I guess you weren't in it, Brandon. Yeah. Shit. Great commercial. One slight second, I was to the left. Yeah, you saw yourself?

I saw myself to the left one time. That was worth getting here. To the left of the whole scene? It was a wide shot from the back right there. There you go. Yay! That's huge, Brandon. Yeah, big time.

Really key part of that commercial. Happy for you, man. Is that going to be a national commercial? I don't know if it's going to be on TV. Isn't Game Time? Game Time is. That's wild yeah rob and them do such a good job yeah it was that was i remember that shoot was like it was only

took an hour he's in and out oh ours felt forever oh your game time yeah you guys aren't lines guys we had to say we only had like three lines that That's a lot for you. We were crushing it. What were your lines? Thank you, game time. Oh, that's three words. Each word is a line. Should have used game time. Give me another one.

Taylor was like, where are the other guys? And then we just go At least 80 times At least 80 times He might have been Fucking with you Well we didn't have Rob wasn't there that day So it was kind of like

They had to make sure They're like we gotta get enough So Rob has options Yeah Should've used game time Should've used game time Thank you game time Although I

I did it Those lines They did those lines. They use those lines where my voice is going up both times. I didn't like it. You did a good job. You did a good job today. We did another commercial today. They should have used game time.

You know what I mean? I'm doing the same tone. They chose two lines that sounded pretty much the exact same. I think you'll be fine. I don't know, man. See what everybody says.

Hank screwed up his lines. We had to stay there for a while for Hank. I don't know what he's doing. Do we have any other ads? High Noon. It's time to load up on the ice and break out

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Go buy them. We got some new fall flavors. We got Maple Pumpkin Pie and Apple Pumpkin. Are they here yet? That's good. I think they're in the office, yes. Yes. And if you don't buy it, you hate dogs.

Yeah. That's just a fact. That's true. dogs buy sell blue coffee is that good marketing because what if a person just outwardly hates dogs now they'll never buy your coffee but they won't admit it i don't think i'd be outwardly hates dogs no i love kirk herbstree's dog ben oh it's awesome to see on tv trotting that old thing across the country. Loud crowds. I bet it loves it. Airplanes.

Yeah. Doesn't get to see any other dogs. I love that dog. Rockstar lifestyle. Who doesn't? You haven't said anything about that. I don't hate dogs. I just hate other people's dogs. But you love Ben, right is kirk herb streets puppy

i'm oh yeah i guess okay because i just want it on the record everybody online has to have a vm a passionate opinion what is the backstory to this jack mack took a shot last weekend kirk's dog yeah oh jack what happened He's the one who started The whole thing I like the take What is the take The private jet thing No So the dog was in

The dog was in like It was literally laying In between him and Reese Davis During the game And like Kind of looked uncomfortable For Reese Davis

And I think What would Jack Mack say He's like I've had enough of this dog Or something Love that. And then it started trending on Twitter, and then Kirk Herbstreit had to like,

he just went on like 30 tweets. Oh. He's a fan. Yeah, quote tweeting people being like, take a walk, buddy. People were, what side, was it split, divisive? I think most people love Ben. I love Ben.

So Ben can do no wrong. Correct. Cart blonde. I'm going to say it. I'm over Kirk Her Ben can do no wrong. Correct. Cart block. I'm going to say it. I'm over curbship dog. It's a shot. He needs 11,000 likes. I was saying to him that before he tweeted that,

that must have been what like Muhammad Atta felt going down the Hudson. Like you're just going for it. And it's just, it's over after that. Well, you know how many people i mean how many people saw that were like finally yeah somebody yeah somebody fucking said it so the dog is like on tv with him a lot uh yeah he was literally like they were doing the intro and the dog was just walking you could see the dog's tail like in the middle yeah he takes oh sounds like you don't love ben i don't oh my god i don't know ben how could you i don't know ben so how can you not like him it's the opposite logic

but you're aware of ben now he is yes so you should by definition definition, love him. I think people will think that it's appropriate to blindly love dogs. Yeah. You can't. Yeah. I mean, even pit bulls. They'll do a video of a pit bull eating another dog, and people will be like, love that pit bull. No bad dogs.

No bad dogs. The owner. It's like that pit bull did no wrong. It's the owner right there. That's how crazy dog love is online. Yeah, just thrashed a toddler. Yeah. There's toddler skin all over the street.

Toddler should have been standing there. Gotta know better. Where's the owner at? Yeah. There are no bad dogs. All right, should we spin the wheel? Proper wild. Proper Wild. Proper Wild.

Brandon. Somebody's got to pop a shot. Oh. One's in the fridge. Where's the fridge? Where's the fridge? What? What fridge?

To your left. We have a fridge? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, that one. I'd love to. Deliciously juicy energy shots and energy gummies that deliver the perfect boost whenever you need to wake up and stay fun. Proper Wild has no weird ingredients, just good, clean caffeine. Their best-selling flavors are peach mango, strawberry kiwi, and blackberry.

What flavor you got there, Kate? I have... Oh, this dog is a massive nuisance. Oh! That dude standing to his left can't move a muscle It gives you 4-6 hours of energy 5 times more caffeine than a shot of espresso

15 times more L-theanine than a cup of green tea Use code WILD for 30% off at properwild.com What flavor was that again, Kate? That's an apple and it is crisp Juicy? I would say so So this is the proper wild wheel Wild.com. What flavor was that again, Kate? That's an apple, and it is crisp. Oh, wow. Fantastic. Juicy?

I would say so. So this is the proper wild wheel. So this would be a bad wheel that Dave is on. Oh, imagine if we got wet. Ties had a towel. A towel would be awesome. Would you do it? I mean, I'd have to, right? You'd have to.

I wouldn't want to. Would Dave get whipped? Really break my heart to do it to him. You'd have to right i'd have to i wouldn't want to really dave get whipped really break my heart to do it to him but you'd have to have to would yeah all right well any last words thank you guys man this is an awesome special day it's a very special day it's not over no thank you guys oh you're oh you're you're running the clock for will come okay yeah all right so will compton day we need a parlay if anything else we need a great parlay to go into You're running the clock for Wilcompton Day. Okay. Yeah. All right. So Wilcompton Day. We need a parlay. If anything else, we need a great parlay to go into tonight. Yeah.

Maybe a linebacker and a score. No. That's the odds, though. What's his name? Carson Steele? Yeah. That's a Wilcompton guy. That is a Wilcompton guy.

All right. Derek Henry, Wilcompton guy. We'll see who we got. Travis oh yeah what um real quick oh that's right yeah yeah real quick what what's going on with you in the swifties yeah i'll be honest i don't know yesterday i you know i hopped on the bird and you saw the, all the swirling things around some document of Taylor and Travis like breaking up or something. Okay. And so I just innocently wrote a tweet having the Swifties chime in for me.

Like I'm like looking for guidance from them. And within a fucking, it was like, all I said was, yeah, cause I guess I did delete it. But I just asked like hey what's going on can the Swifties chime in and they just fucking like fruit flies dude just attacked me

within seconds wait why why were they mad I have no clue they just lost their mind that's crazy I guess it's something they're not playing around with

feels like they're irrational yeah surprising it's not like them don't be afraid of them it's not like them well I was staying up and replying to quite a bit of

people because once the swarm came on me i'm thinking like it you know it was getting later at night i'm thinking i'm this isn't i'm not trying to get involved yeah you know what i mean because i have no clue what's actually happening so are you i don't know why they were so mad are you still a swifty or you think you're on the outside i think we're in that phase to where you're kind of i'm still involved with swifties but you're kind of weeding out the ones that just don't they're not for will compton yeah did you know what i mean they're not for me yeah did you have like taylor swifties actively like engaging with like your football takes they had travis on yeah yeah since we had Did they like stick around And like show support Like some do

But not I mean Fuck em Yeah not to Not to the point Once I tweeted that It was fucking Yeah

I mean it was Yeah they were They were upset Did they say some mean stuff They say mean stuff Maybe like asshole I'll see an asshole a lot Why don't you just call Travis

I'm thinking He's got a big game tomorrow I need him to cover Did they wish death on your family i didn't see anything like that but you're fine if you until you get to that point right i've been there right the one where the swifties were involved and this will get dark for a second but when the the that episode travis came out and i was buying into the swifties i was like hey what's a couple things i can just tweet out there and they like fed me a couple lines just to go rogue. And it was against Ariana Grande.

Grande-nators. The Grande-nators? Grande-nators. Yeah. And that army over there on that side of the field, they were like, oh, you're dead mother. There was a lot of dead mothers. Yeah.

They go crazy. I was going to say, they're like the second most intense. Yeah, they were. The beehive as well. Yeah, the beehive I heard is crazy. The chay hive. Chay hive. Yeah, that gets nasty out there.

I'd love to see the chay hive go against the Swifties. I would take the chay hive. Yeah? Yeah, because the chay hive just fights for sport. They can't lose. Yeah. Yeah, right. They also can't lose.

They do. They don't. Like, think about who they're defending they're just in it for the love of the game there's not they just need a body like they picked the worst guy to defend and they just defend him religiously so they they're just in it to just get a little you know contact they choose the best guy to defend that's like rooting for a team that cannot lose. Yeah, I guess. It's true, but to defend Stephen Che, there's some crazy things you have to... I mean, yeah, there's a lot to topple down to that level.

Yeah, right. How did I end up here? Your blinders are on so hard that no one can take you down. I think the Che Hive could take down the Swifties. Che, you've got to gather the Hive and take down the Swifties. Che, you gotta gather the hive and have a secret job. He's waiting to take you guys to the bathroom to take a picture.

Oh. He's activating the hive. He's probably looking at porn. Wait, hold on. Send it on there. Finding his video. Quick stash. Just send a picture of a pussy. Come on.

Alright. What if he licks his lips like a cartoon wolf? Like somebody that gets pied in a cartoon. Come on. Say when it's sent. Sent, sent, sent, sent, sent. Oh, here we go.

Smirk. A devilish smirk. That's a pretty good smirk. The guy who likes to sneeze. It's just a cock in between two huge tits. Big titty goth girlfriend edges you. Wow. Steven.

Oh, are you saving that? No. Not for you? I don't like tattoos. Okay, okay. Man knows what he wants. Okay, we'll save it for next time. Keep it on him. Let knows what he wants. Okay, let's... We'll save it for next time.

Keep it on him. Keep it on him. Let's try something different. Try something different. This is a segment I can get behind. What is... I sent him titty fucking my neighbor with my massive titties. Oh. There you go. Oh. Take it back. He's going to beat off. Oh, no.

He's going to beat off. He can't escape. What was he doing? Is he saving that? Okay. Too big, he replied. Oh, wow. I just sent him, best friend's mom tells me a secret. Let's see.

We'll just do, this is our new, this is our new gauntlet just make jay horny enough he wants all right great job will congrats will thank you w's in the chat for will yep he's our guy thank you everyone for tuning in subscribe scrimps in the act. It's the act. Yeah, it's time to talk shop or do a Yankee swap. It's the act. It's the act. Congrats to Will Compton, man. Couldn't have happened to a better guy.

Be sure to watch Mook Can't Sleep tonight. All right. See you tomorrow. Boom! Love you guys. Bye.