The Yak - Frank and KB Have All The Girls Chasing Them | The Yak 2-28-22

Episode Date: February 28, 2022

The Legend of FrankYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, that's Yak. Mm-hmm. Yo, that's Yak. Boys, I'm out tomorrow, Wednesday, and Thursday. I was thinking about taking a vacation tomorrow. Tuesday. Yeah.

You just don't take Tuesdays off enough. Forgot to wear it. And I think I'm going to do it. You should do it. Get your Tuesday off. All right, I'm out tomorrow, it. You should do it. Get your Tuesday off. I'm out tomorrow, boys. Nick's Tuesday. Fire merch just dropped.

This is actually awesome merch. I like it a lot. I like how subtle it is. Where's the white one? Is this an off-white? Is that eggshell white? That is not a cream. An Italian cream? Off-white?

It looks a little bit Italian. It's a Tuscan village cream. I think it's a Tuscan. Yeah. It's a Tuscan cream. Yeah. I know that from anywhere. Che's in it, and it looks good.

It looks great on Che's. Like a Hollandaise. It does look like a Hollandaise. An aioli. No looks great on Chase. Like a Hollandaise. It does look like a Hollandaise. An aioli. No. No, no. You're right. I was faking.

All right. Hey, boys. What's new? You know. How was everyone's weekend? Painful. Great. Can't go back to Madison Square Garden.

Why not? I went to a knicks game saturday o'clock oh i go in and there's like metal detectors i take everything out of my closet i'm out of my pockets put them in the bowl i walk through you they're like no we're trying to manifest something yeah go on and then they make me do it it wasn't out of the closet it was out of the pocket it was out of pocket and uh i don't even want to tell this story anymore no that's where it's going i have to what happened i went back through again i was already late for the game everybody behind me in line was getting really mad go back through boop boop boop and they were like they patted me down

there is nothing in your pockets go back through we can't let you in if it keeps beeping. And they were just like, you're not wearing like a giant cowboy belt, are you? And it's the only fucking belt I have from Arizona. So they made me like struggle to take it off. Everybody behind me in line is making fun of me. The tip-off has already happened. This tip-off? Yeah, and I bet first bucket.

Oh, did you win? And it sucked because I bet it in Jersey and had to come all the way back over for the game. Did you win? Nope. So that says you better. Yeah. But now I'm in the market for a new belt. Yeah. For a basketball game belt. It's

supposed to be for Madison Square Garden. Yeah, it's the same size and shape as the cowboy, but it's a basketball. Yeah, but it has to be plastic. Yeah. So if anybody can send me a giant plastic basketball belt. Why the fuck were you, you were role-playing as a millionaire all weekend. I was, yeah.

I had my friend. What's up with that? I've never seen anything like it. I was just, I, for some reason, I mean, I just, I treated for everything. So the Museum of Natural History, they do donations only and you just... If you're a New York resident, you can pay what you want.

And so the couple in front of us was just like, we'll do $5 for the family. And then I went up and I was like, what's the general admission? They were like, well, it's 25 is what we recommend. But three of you, it'll be 75. Or you can pay this and become a member and they can go in for free with you.

I'll just become a member. I'm a member of the museum now. What's that cost? It was like $225. That's a big deal. So we could all go. No, two of you can come with me. Is that a one-time payment? I don't know. They weren't very clear, but it is

out of my account. I can go see Outer weren't very clear, but it is out of my account. I can go see Outer Space and Sharks, the shows that you can't get into. You could take two of us at a time. That's right. So if we want to do some sort of rotating tag team system. I would like to do that. They have astronaut ice cream in the gift shop.

Oh, there you go. One of the few places. I know. That's a very fun fact. That is a fun fact, and it's outside of the space area of it. It's very fitting. That kind of works. It's fun.

My mom asked me to send a picture from the museum, and so I just took a picture of myself, and I wasn't paying attention in what section of the museum I was in, and right behind me was just the wall about monkey pussies. It was just about orangutan pussies. There was a whole wall? There was a whole wall about orangutan pussies. How were they about like orangutan pussies. There's a whole wall? There's a whole wall about orangutan pussies. How were they? Very similar to a human's. Really? From what I've heard.

From what the wall said. Whoa. It's the same shape. Could you jerk off to it? It's like a very scientific... Yeah. I've never been aroused by any animal in any way. Oh, I thought you were going to say pussy. Yeah, you have never been aroused by a pussy. Which is, well that's kind Oh, I thought you were going to say pussy. You have never been aroused by a pussy. Well, that's kind of...

I don't think that's a gay thing. No, it's not. Imagine if you were just... If you're like, I want to look at some porn and you're just looking at pictures of pussy. I think you're a weirdo. I think you are gay. Let me see some lips. I want to jerk off to these lips. It's too complex looking. That's why titties rule.

Steven, are you... Titties are an easy entry point. Steven has to have something. No's too complex looking. That's why titties rule. Steven, are you your only guy? Steven has to have something. No, he looked at me like, oh, man, I only like pussy. He beats off hardcore pussy. Like it's just in. Yeah. I mean, splayed pussy. Acro.

It's all good. I don't dislike any of the parts. But you love pussy. Yeah, but it's harder to enjoy. You love the pussy. No, he is. Titties are... Enjoying titties is the training wheels of heterosexuality.

I'm stuck on training. I never get past them, yeah. Ass is like... Ass is expert. Training wheels. Oh. I think ass is training wheels. Expert mode is knees.

Always has been. It's all one big masterpiece. Find yourself a nice pair of knees. It's the black diamond of heterosexuality. It's trying to get turned on by a pair of knees. I think that's the least sexual part of a woman and man. Yeah. Some people are legs guys, though.

Legs guys, yes. That's inherently sexual. That's a part of the name. It's not the name. Legs guys are all in the thigh. Right, they're all thigh. Part of the name. I like a thick calf.

I feel like legs guys were in the 1950s when that's all you could see of a woman. Look at those stems. Like Marilyn Monroe over that way great. Oh, my God. You know what I'd like to see is her pussy. Because you see thighs and you think of what lies above. You're like, ooh, where does that lead to? Back then, pussies were very ugly.

Yeah. They were way uglier than they are now. That's true. Not shaved. Titties were ug were very ugly. Yeah. They were way uglier than they are now. That's true. Not shaved? Titties were uglier, too. Yeah. I'd argue to say... I think it's an acquired taste. I'd argue to say women were uglier. Well, I'd say probably

everyone was, yeah. Yeah, you're right. What year did titties peak? Like, handsome dudes were just fat. Yeah, just barrel-chested. Yeah, yeah. Tony Soprano. Titties were peaked in, like, the 80s. Wait, is Tony Soprano hot? Yes. I think girls are into him.

Women, yes. Barrel-chested. In the show, he's like this heartthrob. I think there's a certain type. I think most women are attracted to Tony Soprano. I think, yeah. Power. Power attracts women.

Power and money, right? That's why Stephen Che has gotten no pussy since I demoted him to junior draft analyst yeah this guy's got no power steven loves pussy by the way i just want we we glossed over that he is like very adamantly just show me a pussy and i'll come you guys should watch that tutorial i watched yeah oh yeah that's right you watched a cunnilingus tutorial so he's clearly he did on youtube or like porn hub and does his film work not on youtube my friend they don't have you just watch like porn youtube and you got caught and you're like it's a tutorial yeah what did you need it's a tutorial i'm learning how to fuck it was informative i was on youtube red um should we should we we do the wheel real quick?

Fuck, I guess so. We got new wheel merch. It's on our shirts. One cool wheel merch thing that is not in yet, but is in the store right now, is wet wheel towels. Yeah, that's right. So those are going to be coming. We're going to have those in studio. Those are coming from a different place, so they should be in the next day or two. That's right.

So we'll not have towels when we get wet. Unless we forget the wet wheel and the wheel engine i mean what happened this is the caption up there you are the whitest god damn it by far the whitest got me i'm not yeah you are brandon is oh brandon's black i'm the blackest. I probably am. Poor credit. Jay. Jay's the whitest and he's not even white. Yeah, that's true. Should we spin the wheel? Yep.

The wheel is a commitment. By the way, Brandon should have made that poor credit joke. Sorry. I was going to ignore it. Yeah, I was going to ignore it, but then I was like, if I ignore it, then someone's going to come back and be like, wow, he said that thing that's fucked up, and then we've got to deal with that. I didn't even hear what he said.

It was a joke that didn't land. That's all. No, I thought it landed. I exhaled quickly out of my nose. Yeah, yeah. What was it? It was. Stephen Chain laughed.

We don't have to do that, no. Okay, all right. No, I'm trying to save you right now. Oh, all right. Okay, thank you. That's why I was saying that, because I didn't want it to be like, I could see into the future of like a day later someone being like an email that's sent to Eric and Dave like, can you believe Brandon said this? All right.

It's like it was an attempt at a joke that didn't land. Who cares? Good friend. Right, exactly. That's what I'm saying. Really explicitly stating what he did. Right. Who cares?

If the joke didn't land, move on. Who cares? No bad, bad. No matter what did he do it again? No mean things behind it. Fair enough. I didn't even, move on No bad No mean things behind it I didn't even hear it Move fast I did see I did see in the future there

I was like, I'm gonna get an email Could you believe this? Fuck you We can say something worse Not good of a friend I got one Oh, Nick said the other day that he's rooting for Russia. He did say that. He did say you're rooting for Russia, right?

You're like, I kind of like Putin. More specifically Putin. Yeah, he's like, Putin's got this kind of bad boy vibe I'm down with. Yeah, it's more about Putin than the Russian people. Right. You just want Putin to win. Yeah. Right.

Good guy. Never done anything mean to me. Yeah. He's a long guy, done anything mean to me? Yeah. He's a long guy, too. No matter how seven, he comes off as he does. Comes off long. He's long. Yep, yep.

Russia's got acres. For real. He's misunderstood. Everybody's on Ukraine's side. No matter how flat you make a pancake, right, Brandon? Two sides. Yep. The war porn that's coming out on Twitter is very weird.

The war porn? Yeah. I can't say I've seen that. I haven't. Where they're like basically glamorizing war? Oh, not literal porn. Not literal porn. I saw some hotties on one of the sides.

Most of it, they just put a caption that doesn't apply to the video. Right. And it's mostly fake or CGI. You know how Ukraine's president became the president? Yeah. He was an actor. He was an actor, and he made a fake political party in the show. Fans of the show made it real, and he got elected as the real president.

Correct. He also played the president in the show. Nuts. That's why Spacey's coming back in 36. Yep, yep. Let's spin the wheel. He was Paddington Bear as well. Yeah.

It's kind of crazy. In Ukraine. I just want to point out the wheel He was Paddington Bear as well Yeah It's kind of crazy In Ukraine I just want to point out The wheel is taking a stance also The wheel added a banner The world stands with Ukraine Oh Oh yeah Alright wheel

Wheel is just So did Barstool Bubby Oh good Good for her Nice Good job Good good I'm also tired of seeing people on Twitter

Yeah That are just like I'm about to say it too How can you joke or Oh never people on Twitter that are just like how can you joke or nevermind I was just going to talk shit on people talking shit on the wheel it's a commitment it's not supposed to be some novel bit every day it's a part of the show

we're beholden to the wheel and like what's a wheel show without a wheel right also it doesn't consume our every thought anymore we had that phase now it's just a job it's like reading an ad and boy if we have to get wet we're gonna get wet yeah of course why are people surprised that we're gonna beat something into the ground that's what i don't know it always shocks them that happens to family feud again that's yeah that happens so fast on the internet now where it's like you make a if we made a joke

at the beginning of this show and then did it again at the end, they'd be like, oh, keep making this joke. Add credit. Yeah. Add credit. Joke. That was a gnarly joke. I think I did a solid by addressing it instead of letting it go.

Yeah. Streisand. Maybe I was wrong. Should we just get it out of our system, watch it one more time? What? Watch it? Yeah, maybe. Also, I have good credit.

It's really good. So, that makes it worse? All right, go ahead. Spin the wheel. I'm the exact opposite of those people. Spin the wheel. I have a bad feeling. No, don't say that.

Oh, fuck yeah. And we're done. Whoever was complaining for those 30 seconds, go fuck yourself. I hope you drown. Did I say that on YouTube? If you die and your mom reaches out to us like he loved Barstool,

we're burying you in a wheelchair. We're sending it to your funeral. We're drowning you. No, it's going to be like Osama. We're going to put you out in the ocean. Yeah, a Viking funeral. Huh? Yeah.

Drop you off a fucking naval ship. Suck it, bitch. You're fish food now. How was last night? Speaking of pussy. What about pussy? That's how we died in The Sopranos. Oh, yeah.

Good one. It was body in the fucking Newark Harbor. Where were you last night, Brandon? That was in the Atlantic, wasn't it? I was in Ridgefield Park, New Jersey at a... Oh, yeah. I missed. I didn't get to see you, whatever happened.

An Invictus Pro Wrestling show. Can we pull it up? Yeah, there was about 50 people there. I was the manager of Big Trouble with Ben Bishop, and we planned a spot where I was going to, after the match, I was going to hit these guys in the back with a briefcase and he was going to body slam me and he did.

Can we start everyone here? Brandon's like helpless. No! Yeah. No, I said Ben. Oh. Oh, and you're just using your accent. Damn, he's really got your... Oh.

Yeah. That hurt? It did. It did. That was good. Are you sore? The adrenaline... I'm not sore where you think I'm sore.

I hurt my ankles on it. How bouncy is that surface? It's pretty... It's hard, but it's bouncy. Oh, yeah. So I landed wrong. I was supposed to land with your feet straight down on your, however you say that, flat feet. And I landed on my heels, and that hurt my ankle.

So I busted up my ankle pretty good. You ever going to get slammed again? Yeah, yeah. You liked it? I'd like to build up to have a match with the guy. Feel like a little slut. Oh, no way. I got to train now.

I got to learn. No shit and no shit. Are you familiar with the Creed Brothers, Julius Creed? I am. They just won the Dusty Rhodes Classic. Oh, hell yeah. They were college wrestlers. Yeah, they don't fit.

And they wear singlets. They don't look like professional wrestlers. They still look like amateur wrestlers the way they present themselves. They're next up. Are there player announcers in any league? Yeah. Yeah, there are. That'd be cool. Can we do a Yak Live before one? Yeah. Yeah, there are. That'd be cool.

Can we do a Yak Live before one of these? Yeah, we could. That would be the only ones there. And what does this b-walk tell Coach Doug is he's too fat to be at an independent wrestling show? I did. I told him in front of that conference. Is that taken out of context?

Why'd you say that? No. If anything, that would be the only, that would be the event. Yeah, that's like where they're at. They weren't the fattest guys there. They were there? Yeah, they were right here.

I was sitting with them. That sounded mean. I was sitting with them beforehand. Looking them right in the eyes. That's heel work. I said, I'm a bad guy tonight. I'm going to tell you guys you're too fat to be here. I'm going to tell you, I'm going to joke about you.

But look at Doug's little hand. That's a, that's a fucking, you know those little smokies they have? Yeah. Delicious. Yeah. That's what it looks like. Wrap a Cressa roll around one of those boys. Yeah, you go to, you go to Sam's Club or Costco.

They're usually got someone giving away some free little smokies. Always. Yeah. Like 40 of them. You eat like five of them and your body goes into shock from all the salt. What store gave out free popcorn?

Bob's Furniture. East Hardware? Bob's Furniture. EVD Galaxy in Wheeling. Okay. I saw a parrot. It did. Free popcorn is awesome. Like the actual old school popcorneling. Okay. So I had to pair it. You did. Free Popcorn is awesome.

Like the actual old school popcorn machine. Yeah. We should actually have one here. Buy one? It only became a store when DVDs were a thing? Yeah. And then it just went out that quickly. It was a drug front.

Oh, I see. Whoever went to DVD Galaxy. I went to DVD Galaxy all the time because I could go. By weed. It would give me unrated movies because it's not rated R. You didn't have to show an ID. So I was looking at Tiddy's Young. What was the best unrated movie?

You're talking about like Wedding Crashers unrated? Yeah, just like because it had the scene of them throwing on the bed. Right, yeah. That's by far the best cut of that movie. We had Bob's Furniture and there was just like a little man cave for the dads while the moms shopped. It was a popcorn machine and just like one TV. That's awesome. Love seat.

Motherfucking brew. Ruled. Free popcorn rules. It does. Free anything rules, really. Disagree. Sometimes things are a nuisance. Like what?

What free thing is a nuisance? Here's AIDS. Do you want it? Like a free surfboard. Yeah. We should do that one day. Give out free surfboards. I don't know if I would take it.

You have to. You have to. For our one show that was on ESPN, that was we were going to give parting gifts to everyone, and it was just going to be the biggest, most cumbersome thing possible. Like we gave Scott Van Pelt a free air conditioner. Oh, that's awesome. Yeah, and he just threw it away. I've always obsessed with that you guys i don't think any of you guys were working here one year uh for uh we did uh white elephant is that what it's called yeah yeah

we did that and i gave uh pete a free puppy oh my god it was awesome there's a like jumped out of the box commitment yeah and everyone was like oh my god you got him a puppy i was like yep there's a puppy keep it there's a live puppy in a box do you keep it you deal with it i know it was well actually i had someone who brought their puppy okay but i i had the bit going for like 20 minutes but just giving people stuff that like like here's um a child yeah or like a like a you give give them like a- Tommy Walker, a horse. You're like a big dresser. Like they have to like, this is your parting gift. Instead of like a little bag with a barstool hat in it, it's like here is a picnic bench.

Yeah, and thanks for coming through. What do you want us to put in your Uber? Picnic benches are the worst, baby, because like the shape and there's no pieces. Yes, yes. A wooden picnic bench. Yeah. Let's give someone a picnic bench. All right no pieces yes yes a wooden picnic yeah let's give someone a picnic all right can we do put a yak picnic bench in the store you have you can only come pick it up yeah it's not delivery you can only one yak picnic was that puppy still alive yes i followed on uh instagram four years a long time for a dog yeah that is it's like what four

times its lifespan? Yeah. That was awesome, though, because Pete was actually very nervous at first. He was like, did you actually get me a puppy, you motherfucker? He's so mean. You should have given it to him in front of his kid. Yeah. That would have been great. We gave Justin Pugh, who's now on the Cardinals, who was on the Giants, we gave him an ant farm with live ants. Oh, yeah. That's a good gift.

That's really annoying. No, ant farms, Nick loves. They're self-contained. You only have to drop a carrot stick in there once a week. Oh, he said they died within two days. That's classic Justin. Yeah, there we go. Look at that.

He likes it. Oh, my God. Everyone's like, that's the cutest puppy ever I was there for that You were there for that That was a good moment We should start doing that We should start giving gifts that are just

Really fucking annoying Alright Yeah once things start opening up a little bit more When we have guests on the yak Surfboards definitely Really fucking annoying. All right. Yeah, once things start opening up a little bit more, when we have guests on the yak, can we give, yeah. Surfboards, definitely. Maybe an entire, like, bed frame. Oh, bed frame. I know you've always wanted a California king,

which, like, fits in, like, no one's house. Gonna get Michael Warren here and give him a bed. So we know you never had one. Yeah, bunk beds. Here, take these bunk beds. And just hand it to them. Even something that you can carry, but it's just kind of... That was the in-wall air conditioning machine that we gave Scott Van Pelt was very cumbersome.

Perfect size. You could bring that home. It says, why would you? Although you guys... I could definitely say you did. You open your windows? Yeah. Okay. I need one. We're going to need those for the summer. It was like 60 degrees out the other day.

It was like in two weeks. Yeah, it was like 60 out the other day and our apartment was like 200 degrees. Really? Yeah. So is there a thing in New York where you can't control the temperature of your apartment? Our old apartment we could. I cannot. That's the only good part about it. Yeah, there's some that are radiator

controlled. I moved, granted, into the city on Saturday. Oh, wow, big ups. Congratulations. We got in there and it was hot as shit. It was like 80 degrees and she couldn't do anything about it. Where did she move to? You know, the city. You can tell us what area. The boonies or

where billionaires live? Gramercy Park. What? Oh, damn. Oh, so where billionaires live. Grand. Oh, damn. Where does Jordan live by the way that she said the boonies? Like Tribeca or something? I think she lives like not far from the office. Yeah, I thought so.

Who said the boonies? She said she couldn't. When she was having her meltdown on Twitter on Friday, she was like, not all of us can live right next to the office. Not all of us are billionaires who live right next to the office. I live in the boonies. It's like there's no way she lives. Also, after a little investigation, I don't think they live next to the office, do they? I don't know.

Who, Alex? The Bennetts. They live around the corner from us. Also, how did you keep track of who was melting down? Jordan melted down. It is where the billionaires are. office do they i don't know alex the bennetts they live around the corner from us also how did you keep track of who was melting down like jordan melted down is where the billionaires kim melted down too kim didn't melt down kim was under control was under control the best part about that whole thing was that jordan and it was a kim though kim i was tweeting yeah i think so kim or jordan and alex were mad at me because I found out who Chad was or something.

She didn't realize that Kim and I were just whispering back and forth to each other, Frank the Tank, all of Friday. It was very funny. I was just like, I know who it is. She's like, who? I'm like, Frank. That's funny. Like, why the fuck are you guys saying all this stuff?

Like, Jordan still thinks it. Like, I know something. I don't know or care. Yeah. Mean girls. You were on the Dave Portnoy show today, too. I was. For a long time.

Well, that was a while. Rico and I, yeah. Rico, I don't know what. Rico just doesn't listen to anything. Anything. I saw Rico leaving when we were coming in. You didn't get him started smoking weed or something. Dude, he doesn't listen to anything.

He met your guy's head coach? Yeah. That seemed to go well. One of the most cringeworthy things. He was mad that I said it was cringeworthy. It's like, what do you want me to say? It was. I thought it was funny.

I didn't know what it meant. Your hand was forced. I laughed. I thought it was cringeworthy. I watched it. I cringed. Honest man. What am I going to do?

What was it about on the Dave Portnoy show? Just Rico thinks that, like, I don't know. Listen to Dave Portnoy shows. It went in so many different. Come on. It's crazy. It's crazy. That's the ultimate.

He's mad at me and Dave for bashing Benchmob, even though I've been very supportive of Benchmob. Weren't you on it for a while? Yes, I was. Thank you, Nick. Yes, I was though I've been very supportive of Benchmob. Weren't you on it for a while? Yes, I was. Thank you, Nick. Yes, I was. I've been very supportive. I retweeted. I do every show they want me to do. Also hooked up some relationships for him. Of course. I'm trying to get him another guest right now. And then Rico

does a really cringeworthy thing with my head coach and I respond how I would respond because I think it's not cool. I thought it was very late so he's mad now that i'm bashing him and it's like i can't not respond to that like people would think i was in the hospital if i never responded what do you do just a quick you can play it add some also comment to the head coach it was tweet yesterday it was a funny joke he he

about about it's so hung up on it the storm chasers being awesome and then Benchmob not as awesome. But it was a joke. It's clearly a joke. But he gets so hung up on it, he doesn't listen to it. It's one of those, we did the whole interview there, and I don't think Rico listened to one thing I said. And then he's going to get mad at me in like two weeks and be like, you don't support me.

And I'm like, you didn't listen to anything I said. And round and round we go. He also stormed out during pick central but he stormed out and didn't take the stairs so he stormed out oh no sat in the bank of elevators for like oh no just sitting there stewing like that's not a good storm out this is the this is the video i got a storm it's late it's it's i'm sorry it is i'd be more worried about my tea time on the second weekend I'm sorry, it is. I'd be more worried about my tea time on the second weekend.

Greg Gard said something about the flames flying out, and Rico gave a canned line about tea times. Canned. He knew he was going to deliver that all day. The lines don't match up. It was two conversations happening. The flames, that was a general statement about the pyrotechnics. He literally was coming over to be like, he just was saying a random thing to them.

Like, hey, how about these... T-Time, meaning they're getting out first round. So it was like... I don't mind that. Pretty neat arena, huh? Yeah. How about your fucking death coming up? You're about to fucking die.

You have cancer. It made no sense. How do you like that arena? How do you like that lump on? You're about to fucking die. You have cancer. It made no sense. How do you like that arena? How do you like that lump on your testicle? Yeah, right. So I just was like, it doesn't... I don't think it's that bad. It's cringeworthy to me.

Some ball busting. It didn't make sense, though. If he had come up... I told Rico, if he had replied, yeah, I like the flames. You're going to need more firepower to make it out of the first weekend in March or something like that.

Do they have a history of going back and forth? None. Does he have something against the— That was the first time Greg Gardner ever met him. Then I like it more. I like it. I don't dislike it at all. You went in there with the purpose.

There we go. We got support. Wisconsin went on to lose that game, right? Unfortunately, they won. Oh. He was mad that I said that. I'm going to say that because I'm giving my take. I don't think you saying it's cringeworthy is weird at all. Right.

Or something that he should be mad about. Then he gets mad. That's just your team. If it was any other coach, I probably wouldn't have even commented on it. It would have been a nothing. So yeah, unround and round we go. I do like Benchmob. I hope it does well.

I'm always going to support it. Poor Marty. Poor Jake. Poor Jake. Jake is the one who's really – because Rico just runs around and talks for him. They were also – they were on the road for like six days, and they come back and then he – you know, they're in the mixer here. Looks like the Mean Girls are heading out early today.

Clocking out at 1. They're going to Alice's place or the Boonies? Ernie? Who knows? Who knows? I'd beat the traffic. Who knows? Who knows?

Oh, what's going on with them? I shouldn't be talking because I'm taking Tuesday off. It's a Nick Tuesday. Yeah, that's true. You guys celebrating? Yep. I am, yeah. I'll be taking tomorrow off too.

Well, no, I'm working tomorrow, but I'm not going to be. I'm buying lunch. Happy Nick Tuesday. Nick Tuesday. It's a national holiday. Every Tuesday. No, you get to choose one Tuesday a month. One Tuesday a month.

Wow. So you're getting March 1st. How about one Tuesday a month, 14 Tuesdays a year? Whoa. Yeah. Yeah. A little bit of a spin on it. I like that. It's like, whoa. So one month we get

two months. You can never do two Tuesdays in a row. Right. I always have to space them out. Even though you can't go last week of the month, first week of the month? You can do that. That's really the rules. Really it.

Pretty simple, guys. Trying to start a wave. Straight forward. Nobody takes just a Tuesday. No one. It's the worst day to take off. What are you going to do on your Tuesday? Don't have to tell you.

What do you mean, girls? It's the worst day to take off. Swear to God if she keeps fucking around like that. KB. KB. KB. Boy. What the fuck is she doing? My boy.

Fucking relax. She's still texting you? Can't be fucking kissing on coworkers. Day one shit. Can't be smooching motherfucking dudes in sales or whatever the fuck. What's next? Kyle, we're live. Kyle, we're fucking live, dude.

How are you going to kiss on a co-worker? Who was it? Was it Sage? How are you going to do it? The whole... Did you guys see the deleted clip that Stoolie Clubhouse posted? No. I don't even know how he got it. Our new co-worker. Props to him.

I thought he was a conglomerate. I thought he was at least 40 men. Good for him. He's one guy? He's one simple lilac. Didn't he work out on a ranch? He's a lilac farmer. Yeah.

Northern California. It's awesome. I think he worked here though, right? Yeah, I think he got hired. I think he did get hired. DM me asking what you should ask for a salary. He's a beast if that's just him. Well, he's...

He's not crowdsourcing? He's the type of guy who, like, he worked harder than some of the people that worked Oh, by far. Much harder, I would say. Way harder. The podcast was... We posted our podcast at 7 a.m. and he'd have all the clips by 7.15. Yeah, he's a beast.

He'd apologize for being late. Yeah. He's awesome. I bet you he's hot as fuck, oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah oh so hot i would hit it yeah i have to it works for us now you know the rules you know the rules you gotta any new hires onboarding jersey jerry got really upset got like scared that he was getting fired because he tweeted about Rhea's feet and then Bree's job. He sure did. Yeah, he did.

And then he got, I think it was just natural because there's a new handbook or something, but he got an email being like, you have to do training. And he was like, oh no, is it it for me? I was like, no no but maybe don't tweet about your co-workers body parts he's like yeah okay there yeah i mean yeah i guess i get that all right it's not that type of place word yeah i'll stop he won't stop he He can't. I don't even want him to stop. He can't. Big news, Steven. I just booked Schefter for PMT.

Hey. Let's go. On Wednesday, so in person. In person? Oh, hell yes. Not here. On the act? Not here. Steven, you were right as well.

I think Adam Schefter would and probably will break the world's war. Wait. Thank you. So you just acknowledged him? He won the argument? Yeah. Like a weekend reflection. Makes a big man. Appreciate that. Wait, so you just acknowledged who won the argument? A weekend reflection. Makes a big man.

Appreciate that. Kudos to you, Owen. Thanks. Anything to say to Owen? I said thanks. I acknowledged Owen. That's all. That's my buddy.

I apologize for being cunty. I don't think you're a cunty. No, you're fine. We're buddies. We are. We're buddies. Every friend group needs that horrible cunt. You know?

That insufferable, miserable, seeping cunt. Seeping was wicked. No, you didn't have to say that. Seeping was too much. Frank's down bad right now. Yeah, he is. The lockout's really...

PFT brought up a good point on part of my take. Like, it is funny that he is so upset about the lockout when the Mets cause him nothing but anger. Yeah. And does he love Kyrie Irving? He now loves Kyrie Irving. Kyrie Irving is Frank's hero. The key to everything in his life.

Also... He's talking to Enrique. I bet he's talking about Kyrie Irving. What does Enrique... Ebony En life. Also, he's talking to Enrique. I bet he's talking about God. What does Enrique do? Ebony Enrique. No, he's talking on the phone. He's on the phone with someone. Not Frank?

No, no. That's a two-hand talk. That's a conversation. He is on the phone. Oh, you're right. You're right. It's in a video. That might have been a cameo.

Frank also on Wednesday, or tomorrow actually, I think, is going to lock out the lockout. Yeah, he is. Which has never been done. Oh, shit. Damn, titties in the office. So Frank is going to protest the MLB lockout. Joey's holding those titties. Oh, my God.

Slap the titties. Slap the titties. Frank smacked the titties. Frank just slapped the titties. Slap the titties. Can I see a replay of that? Frank slapped the titties. Frank slapped the titties.

It was an open hand slap. I think that's a primal move when you see titties. Frank, you dog. No, but you see Joey come out. Oh, no. Look, he rolls his leg. He knows they're coming. I need this clip.

He tried once. Calls him back. He summons the titties. He beckons the titties. He beckons the breast. Oh! Oh! Oh, my God. I see that clip right now. We got to get that on the Twitter.

Oh, my God. That is amazing. Frank. You got to keep the roll up in. Yeah. Slap them titties. Also a sweet-ass jersey. That is a sweet jersey.

God damn, what a legend. Dang. Joey Camasta was holding those titties like it was one of those Chinese puzzles that you get a cracker by. I had no idea what to do with it. I mean, you had some... What did you say about titties? Yeah, what did you say about titties?

You were describing a girl revealing her titties, and you were like... You were worried about how fast they come out. You were trying to like... I was trying to yuck it up with the boys. How hot it was about the speed in which they came out? I don't know. I was just trying to yuck it up with the boys. How hot it was about the speed in which they came out. I don't know. I was just trying to yuck it up with you guys fit in. And I was just like, I love how fast that they like come out of the frost.

He was trying to describe tits. He was like, you should have seen how fast they just like spilled right out. I could have used any other term. Oh, man. Nah. I don't help myself ever. Nah. The NASCAR sound.

That was Stephen Chase. That was Stephen Chase. Can we pull up that? No. The video of the kid in the frat house taking a shit and it sounded like an Indy car. What? I'll send it. I'll send it.

It's amazing. What a sentence that is. I can't believe Frank slapped his hand That was awesome I wish he had licked it though I wish he had licked his hand The rolling up the sleeves is amazing Oh my god Joey didn't know that Frank was going to slap the titties at that point

Frank knew though He whiffed on the first one He tried to do it kind of discreetly And then he said no fuck it I'm just going to do it. Yeah, let's fucking go all in. But yeah, Kyrie Irving is his hero. Kyrie Irving can practice now in my basement, so that's huge. Yeah, that is nice.

Huge. Can't play in the game still. Has he been by the building? Yes, I've seen him a couple times. Very nice. Is it a pain having to buzz them in? Yeah. I usually have my son do it.

Yeah. But it is a fucking pain. I played on saturday didn't what played what the fuck 14 points in 16 yeah 14 points in six games pretty good ones and twos though twos and threes you play with gary v twos and threes and also i think i scored six points in one game. Damn. But I love the stat. Triple-double. Your guys were one for six.

One for six in plays where you said, all right, go ahead, shoot it. Yeah, where I have a rule on defense. Let him shoot. Yeah, on defense, if the guy I'm guarding wants to shoot an outside shot, I will let them shoot it until they make one. They were one for six against that strategy one and i was they were one for six against that strategy does that mean they were over five and they finally hit one yeah that's pretty locked out i'd be willing if it helped you i'd be willing to flip to the rebound

rule if you want a full rebound for ones you box out and half ones you grab would that give you more yes that would give you more so i had a lot of i was playing i was not playing a natural center i was being there was a center on my team so i was playing more power forward so there was a lot of me boxing out him grabbing the board we're doing the work at least i was doing the hard work pretty dramatic photo too that was nicely yeah it was framed yeah roll out before oh dude i i i warmed up and cooled down longer than i played nice yeah what Yeah. What was the cool down like? We played six games. Cool was, yeah, because we kept on winning because the guy I was playing with is taller and really, really good at basketball. Is he professional?

He actually did play in Europe. I don't know why he played. He's a really nice guy. I like him a lot. I don't know why he plays in this game because he like dunks on people. That's probably why. Legitimately dunks on people. That's probably awesome for him.

But it's also got to kind of suck because it's not that good of a game. But the guy I played didn't get hurt. Think of how fun it would be you playing basketball against a bunch of eighth graders. Yeah. Yeah. I think I'd get frustrated, though. You need to go back to sixth graders.

Yeah, I think I'd get. This is also why we've had this argument before, but dunking is not that cool in pickup basketball. If you're awesome from three, that is very cool. I disagree. I don't think it's that. I think it's kind of. If you're 6'8 and dunk, fine, it looks plain. But if you're 6'4 or something and you just bust out a dunk,

that's incredible. I guess it's more like if you're – I guess it's because it's – well, it's cool if you're younger, right? And the best dunk to do in pickup basketball is a rebound dunk where nobody's expecting it. Yes, that obviously is always cool. Like breakaway dunk, that's not fun. Yeah, I'm just saying like if you play in a game that everyone's below the rim

and you're the only one dunking, I don't – I always am like, eh. Yeah, you're right. The coolest guy out there is the guy that hits five threes in a game. Right, exactly, in a pickup game. I'm talking pickup game where it's like if there's one guy who dunks and no one else can dunk, it's like, all right, dude, chill out. Get it. You can dunk.

If you're playing in a game where everyone can dunk, that's different. Yeah, he's the only one who can dunk. Would you rather if I was like, okay, this next game you're going to hit five threes or you're going to dunk once, which would you pick? I would take five threes. No, you wouldn't. You liar. Dink once?

I get guarded like Ben Simmons. So you get that done to you. No, literally there was a moment where I was just wide open for three and a guy guarding me was just like, take it. I was like, fuck you, and I passed it. I'm not going to fucking. I know what you're trying to do. Yeah.

There's no way I'm going to make this. Zero percent chance after that. Yeah, no. I was probably shooting. If I had genuinely shot 10 threes in that game, I might have made one. When are we going to play our basketball? I wonder where you're going. Yeah, we got to do it.

I'm dying to get back out on the court now. I've been here in this talk. We have a location. We just got a schedule. Today, yeah. It'll happen. Thank you. I can't do it tomorrow. You're off. just got a schedule with everyone. Today, yeah. It'll happen. Thank you. I can't do it tomorrow.

You're off. Yeah. I'm off Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. When's Roan coming back? It's not going to be a week. I'm going to be here Wednesday. Wait, you're out which days? Tomorrow.

Nick, Tuesday. Wednesday, I'll be in Indianapolis. Thursday, I'll be in Indianapolis back Thursday afternoon. All right, so draft Friday? Friday. I'm down if Roan's here. Yeah, Friday.

Definitely down. I wanted to be in Burger. Hamburger. Listen to this guy's shit real quick. All right, yeah, yeah, yeah. Shut up, shut up, shut up. You hear it? Right in the beginning.

I just think that... No way. That's that... No way. No way. That's awesome. No way. Unreal. One more time. You're playing a car video.

I'll send it to the group. Shitting in like a stall amplifies the sound of the shit so much. I've never had a quiet shit in a stall. No, it makes it so fucking loud. I was in a stall on Saturday and I knew people in the bathroom and I had to go to the stall. Oh, yeah.

Everyone hears it. That's a good tweet from the Yak account, whoever did that. What do we got? Good job. What are these girls doing in there? Oh yeah No the girls that

In the bathroom I think it was like A co-ed bathroom And that guy's just Letting it rip like that Food poisoning I don't fuck with that at all When you go to

Like where were we recently We were at a bar And the bathroom was like Co-ed Oh yeah That there's a few just everyone is in the same line yeah super weird yeah let's move to texas brother yeah we gotta how that also gets rid of our bathroom advantage yes the whole being a guy is that there's no line how are stalls so so archaic still? What do you mean? Like half of them don't flock. Yeah. There's like, there shouldn't be space. And you get like half an inch

to look through. There should just be the vacant or non-vacant button. And they should be 100% hands free. I don't want to have to lift a... What about the sinks? Take the poop out of my butt. I want to put a tube. Suck it out of my butt. Yeah, just... I want to put a tube... Suck it out of my butt. Yes.

Imagine if it was just a tube you got to sit on. I'd love that. Just sucked it right out of your butt. That'd be awesome. That'd be so great. Having like a bathroom... Yeah. Having one of those bathroom, like, what is it?

A bathroom attendant? Yeah. What are they called? I hate that. In like a shitty bar is just like an inconvenience. Oh, you got to tip them. Yeah. Every time.

Well, if you want them to tell on you when you do blow, oh you gotta tip them yeah every time well if you want them to tell on you when you do blow you gotta tip them to pay them so yeah you tip them 20 bucks at the start of the day and then when you go in the bathroom it's like hey this guy he's just doing blow a little tip for you out there you didn't realize that was what they were there for they're literally the cocaine police no i, I didn't realize that. That's how they make all their money. Fuck. Yeah. You haven't been paying them, have you? It's the interview process for a bathroom attendant.

Who carries cash? I do. I love carrying cash. You do? Yes. He's always carrying cash. Cash is king. I didn't even bring my wallet with me today.

Cash is so much fun to carry because you can just be like, oh, can you grab this? Can you do this? Like, oh, let me pay for that with this. Don't have to think about it. Your billionaire privilege is showing, by the way. Yes, sure. When I was at the SNL after party. Oh.

No big deal. Wait. What? Hold on. I've told this story before. Wait, which one? Which one? Which after party?

I've only been to one. When was it? Michael Chase. Probably in November. You haven't told this story. I told it on Son of a Boy Dad, right? Well, we don't listen. Pretend we don't listen.

Well, I went to an SNL after party. You're still doing that show? I went to an SNL after party, and there was a bathroom attendant in there, and it was at like a super fancy club. Wait, tell them what Sudeika said about trans people. Even McKinnon said some shit oh and i i tried to tell the dude my idea about how funny it would be if the bathroom attendant had to wash your hands for you and he did not laugh at all no i don't think i thought it was so funny imagine because you know how they spray the soap on your hands imagine if they just started lathering up your hands for you right yeah but you were that's an lscape yeah exactly

attend an interview where like the person interviewing just keeps farting and it feels worse and worse the guy doesn't blink you and ron need to bring back son of a boy dad i know yeah you should actually got this week we actually have an exclusive interview with ron talking about um almost getting arrested at Storm Chasers. So it'll be a must listen. They almost got arrested again? Arkansas?

You didn't pay attention to anything this week. I saw they couldn't get into Arkansas. I didn't know it was a legal thing. What'd you get into this weekend, Kyle? I was with Nick the whole time. What were you guys doing with Pokemon shit? I was in his room. He was at my place. Oh, you have a Charizard? Yeah. I was with Nick the whole time. Yeah, what were you guys doing with Pokemon shit? I was in his room. He was at my place.

Oh, you have a Charizard? Yeah. I'm assuming he has multiple. Of course. No, what was the one that was in a glass case? That's my Jigglypuff. It's my favorite Pokemon.

It's my first ever Pokemon card. How much is it worth? Right now, not much. So and so on, yeah. The replies weren't good. They said like $100 tops. Yeah, but I bought it when it was 14.

You gotta get Dugg's to analyze that thing. Jigglypuff? Just $200 at least. But I don't know. It's just my favorite Pokemon. It's not about the value of it. It's about the sentimental. So you'd never sell it?

Never. Didn't you just buy another one? Yeah. They're only like $100. My kids are getting into Pokemon, i i changed my wallet recently and when i got home my youngest son had taken ownership of my wallet and it was full of pokemon cards that's good that's badass that's not that's also ruining the value because you know yeah they yeah um when when uh christmas time i think i don't know if i told you my wife was like we need to get our nephews

who were like eating 10 Pokemon cards. And she was like, you work with a bunch of fucking kids? Ask one of them. And I was like, they're not into Pokemon. I was like, wait. 30-year-old Nick is. And I called him up and I was like, what should I get? I answered immediately. Here's what you get.

He also loved it. You're on Moana now, right? Oh, what do you guys think? I've never seen Moana. It's incredible. So good. I've been staring at the edge of the water. Yes. What reason did you have to watch Moana?

I never watched it. It's a good movie. I loved Disney soundtracks. My son has not slept since. I think it's incredible. I got him a heart of taffeti. Oh, yeah. It lights up, and he just hasn't slept since slept So he was on an Ice Age kick before that?

Is that what you said? Cars kick Cars too though right? That movie sucks What about Encanto? I heard that's where we're going now The Jessica Darrow surface pressure song is elite I love Maui

The rock in Moana Moana's a good ass movie. It is. What about Big Hero 6? It's also a good ass movie. What's the Day of the Dead one? Soul. I think Soul's the jazz one. Coco. That one's good. Coco's good. Watch that. I do. I did a weekend

where I just watched all of them. Really? The problem is I don't pay attention enough to them. I want to pay attention enough to one of them that I can make it my niche category in. Oh. It should be funny. I know that I don't.

I half watch them, you know, when we're watching it. That's still so much more than anybody else probably. There's so many details that you know Jeff. Yeah. Jeff definitely knows all of them. That's the thing. You have to make your niche category about something you know nothing about. So it'll just give you a basic question.

Right. Yeah. What were you going to say? I don't know. Moana what? I was going to say it's hard to half watch Moana because it grabs your attention. Yeah. That's the thing with all those movies.

You go into it and you're like, I'm not going to watch this. And then halfway through you realize you've been staring at the screen for an hour. It happened with Ratatouille two weeks ago for me. Ratatouille's amazing. I need to catch up on my Pixar. Ratatouille's my favorite, probably. I think there's a Moana 2 coming out. Really?

Really. Yeah. The theaters. Is The Rock in it? I would assume so, right? Better be. Who's the next The Rock? Why did everyone hate on The Rock's Rams thing?

When his LA... It was awkward. I thought it was awesome. I thought it was awesome too. Really? I thought he was wearing maroon with maroon. I thought it was just weird. Yeah, that's cool.

Just play the game. Have you seen what they do with Michael Buffer? That's way worse. What? Yeah, it is Michael Buffer. Where he says, like, let's get rid of Rumble, but he says it and nobody pays attention and just kick off through it. Yeah, I think it's all awkward.

Yeah, but that's always been a tradition in the sport. Yeah, but I think anything before the game besides the National Anthem is awkward. Yeah, but it's the Super Bowl. They've never done anything like that at the Super Bowl before. Let's get ready to rumble. It's a tradition, not the Rock. Yeah.

I thought the Rock built it. On Cena? Oh, Cena's too down? Cena's already like... Oh, Cena's too dead. He's too fucking... I'm talking about Gen Z. Peacemaker's fucking awesome.

He's having a moment with Peacemaker. I was going to say like Tom Holland. No. Axl? It can't be a tradition. I probably... I already said Axl, bro. You did?

Yeah. Is Momoa already the new rock? It's Moana. Jason You did? Yeah. Is Momoa already the new rock? It's Moana. Jason Momoa? Yeah. Why? Well, he already has... No, he doesn't have the personality.

Big Aquaman, he already... Yeah, but he's big and he's... Yeah, but you need the personality. Everyone can be... Anyone can be big. I could look like The Rock if I wanted to without having the personality. You definitely could. I don't know. I mean, I think it's hard to find the having the personality. Definitely could. I don't know.

I mean, I think it's hard to find the next rock until it just happens. Yeah, I don't think there is a next rock. Who was the last rock? Schwarzenegger? Before him? I don't think he was even as big as the rock, though. Oh, yeah. Will Cogan?

He was the governor of California. Yeah, he was pretty big. Sell out. Nice. Yeah, but he's right. Yeah, those rocks never sold out. You knocked that curveball out of the park. Holy shit.

I'm mad on it. How old is he now? Swartz? Yeah. Probably like 75. How old's The Rock? I also think The Rock will live to like 180. The Rock's 50 this year in May.

Schwarzenegger's kid that he knocked up his nanny. It's Tommy Walker's birthday. 74. Schwarzenegger knocked up his nanny and just refused to acknowledge even though the kid looked exactly like him. You show his son, Schwarzenegger's son, nanny. Patrick? Is it Patrick?

That's the one that's friends with Marty Mush. No, it's the other one. He had an out-of-wedlock son who he refused to acknowledge for a very long time. It's Joseph Benya. Maybe he doesn't look like him. Fuck. This would suck. No, he does.

He definitely looks like him. Oh. Must suck having him. Yeah. For the first 20 years, he was like, that's not right. A little bit in the face. Joseph Pena. He's not nearly as cool as Arnold.

Nah, I mean Arnold. Come on. The pump, it's better than coming. The pump. The pump. I'm coming and I'm coming and I'm coming. I'm coming in the gym. I'm coming at home.

I come all day. Can we watch that clip real quick and I'm coming. I'm coming in the gym. I'm coming at home. I come all day. Can we watch that clip real quick? Arnold just coming. Yeah. KB, you've seen this? It sounds familiar. For sure. Pumping iron.

This should be something you've seen. KB, when's the championship for wrestling? Soon, right? Yes. I'm getting pumped. Go out there. Actually, yeah. Big 10s are next week.

This upcoming weekend. How's Wisconsin? Doesn't have a team. they have a very good team we do the whole Big Ten has it's the they run the NCAA

fuck yeah all of them yeah Big Ten Stokes now I'm in now hell yeah how's Rutgers they're down a year but they're

yeah we should all go to a a tournament meet who's like a who's like a mid-major I would go to Big Tens Probably Indy Or Columbus

Or Chicago Scatoway How you doing TJ After we just ripped your heart out I would have loved for you to be there It was a fun game until the end Good times That's it hard out, huh? I would have loved for you to be there. It was a fun game until the end, obviously. Good times.

That's it. That was a little Che-like. Yeah, it was. I was really sad at the end. That was Che-ish. Che adjacent. Didn't want to be there at the end. It was tough. Good times, though. Stephen Che, like... I appreciated your video. Got the crowd riled up at the bar. Some people say I don't support the bench, though. Stephen Chay, like, he's... I appreciated your video. Got the crowd riled up at the bar.

Some people say I don't support the bench, Bob. Yeah. You were getting booed by our fans. I'm saying, every time they ask me for a video, I'm on the scene. Made everyone in my house shut up. Shut up for a minute. I gotta make a video. They did.

Did you really... Yes. You really have family. Whole family. You knew exactly what I was gonna ask. family whole family knew exactly what i was gonna ask yes i knew exactly what you're gonna ask the kentucky hit a buzzer beater to i pushed but covered the spread i lost it so you lost but you could see it coming as soon as that made that call it was coming happened during nap time in my household and then when everyone woke up i i made everyone sit on the couch and i rewound the TV and showed everyone. Oh, that's awesome. It was bad.

That's when you have a bad beat. That's just what happens. You have to do that shit. It was bad. Coping. That's hilarious. I knew it was going to happen. Why are bad beats always bank shots?

Always. And also, fuck anyone who thinks that like, a lot of people are like, oh, dude, you rewound this and made the video. I did that shit live. I knew I was going to lose live. You could tell. You could tell. You could tell. You just know sometimes.

Fake. Fake. Big time wrestling tournaments in Lincoln. Oh. Lincoln. Worst place. One of us should just be a fake guy all week. I've been to Lincoln.

Fake. What are your thoughts on that? It was actually nice. Had a fake guy all week. I've been to Lincoln. Fake. What are your thoughts on that? It was actually nice. Had a good burger place downtown. Nebraska's football stadium is amazing. Burgers have the lowest bar for good. Yeah, that's true.

Really just have to be functional. We're going to find out Friday. The greatest feeling you can get in a gym, or the most satisfying feeling you can get in a gym, is the pump. Let's say you train your biceps. Blood is rushing into your muscles, and that's what we call the pump. Your muscles get a really tight feeling, like your skin is going to explode any minute.

It's really tight. It's like somebody blowing air into your muscles. It just blows up, and it feels different. It feels fantastic. What's the music? I should be in that, Jack. It's as satisfying to me as coming is. Having sex with a woman and coming. Thanks for the clarification.

I'm in heaven. I'm getting the feeling of coming in the gym. I'm getting the feeling of coming at home. I'm getting the feeling of coming backstage when I pump up, when I pose out in front of 5,000 people. I get the same feeling. So I'm coming day and night. I mean, it's terrific, right?

So, you know, I'm in heaven. Man, he really... Day and night. He really clarified there. It's like when you put your penis In a vagina You come You're coming

Imagine being that jacked I'd argue nuh uh Yeah No I think being in that good of shape Feels like coming Like being in that and like feeling insanely strong and always good has to be the best feeling. You think he always feels good? In that state?

Yeah. Yes. I think he always had like a great sore. When I was sober and working out, I felt amazing 24-7. Right. And I hated it. I was like, I can't. This is not sustainable.

You need to feel the bad. So when you feel good, it feels really good. And then you're really coming. Yeah, and that's when you can... Yeah, you shouldn't be coming all the time. You should be focused on quality. You don't even know you came. Yeah, and when the time comes...

It's like a sad jerk-off. Ever have a sad jerk off And you come and you're just like I didn't even feel that I'll orchestrate my own L Yeah It's like I'll stage a coup

To make sure I get an L Yeah you just come And you're just like Hey sometimes you have to do What you gotta do A sad jerk off It is Like you know when you jerk off

Sometimes you're like I didn't even feel anything What was that? That was a waste of time. That didn't really do anything for me. Just like, yeah. It was more tears than tea. You jerk off while you're drunk

and it's like you're wrestling with your dick. You're slapping it around. Then you start yelling at yourself. You're like, I'm such a fucking loser. You spit on your hand. Steven does that to his own dick. He spits on his own dick. Oh, baby.

Not true. Yeah. He spits on his own dick. He's like, you like that, big boy? I'm a guy. Jay Dirty talks to himself. Yeah. You're a little slut.

You like this hand? That's your hand. That is your hand. Pathetic loser. You're a little slut. You like this hand? That's your hand. That is your hand. Pathetic loser. Couldn't get pussy tonight. Look at you hunched over this little dick. Just rubbing. What are you going to start a fire?

Punish yourself. You're going dry tonight. You fucking little dick. Yeah, that's how Steven jerks off Yeah When's Mincy coming back? Oh man he had a great text last night on the pick center Which I didn't even remember

I just did a roll call I said guys who's Everybody with Mincy back tomorrow? Yeah and then Marty liked it Yeah and then there Shit's getting so wild in NOLA That's perfect Give us an example, Mincy.

What do you say? I'll say it's Fat Tuesday Con is going to be bananas. Full total commitment. That's good that he's committed. Yeah. Yeah. I was worried. Tuesday's tomorrow, right?

Should be. Yeah. Brother, that's Nick Tuesday. Tuesday's tomorrow. Fat. You celebrating Fat Tuesday. Nick Tuesday is tomorrow. Fat. You celebrating Fat Tuesday, Nicky? I don't even know what Fat Tuesday is, to be quite honest.

I just know it's the end of Mardi Gras. That dude's gay. What? Yeah. That dude's gay. Hell yeah, man. It's that 159 joke. I love 159 jokes. Fat Tuesday, more like that dude.

159 jokes. Own category of jokes. 159. All right. All right. All right. All right. Good show.

We found some good stuff. Hamburger Friday. I'm in. As long as Roan's here, we need everyone here. Should be here. All right. Hamburger Friday. Outro Music Until next time.