The Yak - GUEST OF THE YEAR? The Very Best Of Chef Donny On The Yak (2026 1st Half): Tues Jun 30, 2026

Episode Date: June 30, 2026

You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyakYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon music. You the robot. Hi, Jimmy, Fores. Are you serious? I'm the coolest one out of all of us. That was incredible.

Donnie, Donnie, Donny, Donny, Donny. Are you wearing bigger shoes? Yeah, these... I saw you, the way you sat down and you was put your feet up, so we'd notice. And then you just put them down. If we could replay that. I'm flipping off the seat because of these are normal size shoes are just thicker bottoms. Hey, Donnie.

I have something you want. What's that? So we got to figure out what you can give me. Where we're talking here? You know what you want. Oh, I think I got it. You know what you want. Dude, yeah, this, I like these are your new, your EMP mats.

So I, uh, so two, three weeks ago, when. we were doing PMT. It was when the, it might have been two weeks ago, it was when the office was closed. So we were here. It was no one here. It was like one in the morning.

We were doing the show. And we started talking about QB gifts. So they're O-Lyman that they do every year. And we were talking about the saddest one. And it was Tua who had been benched, who still got his O-Lyman a gift. But it wasn't sad because of that. It was sad because he got his O-Lyman,

these crystal heating pads that are supposed to make your brainwave, like work in overdrive. total junk science no that's a good gift so i on the spur of the moment feeling a little loopy i think i'd had a good sunday betting i bought three of them for fifteen hundred dollars a pop oh you're not cheap science isn't cheap these are heating and i have all three and we've we've got on them for like two seconds we have not done anything with him last night donnie's like you have these and uh he he

wants one bad he said the you have to get on it naked not You don't have to be butt-ass naked. Yeah, bring it out here. It works better if your skin is, like, direct skin. What does it do? But would it work the best if you were butt-ass naked? Yeah, you would. It's like sunning.

Have you ever done sunning? The perennial sunning? No, I've not. Is that where you, is that where you tan your gooch? It's, yeah, you don't tan it, but you put it in the sun. It was one of the most regrettable purchases I made. It was so regrettable that when I hit Send, I tried to do the thing that you did when you were, like, a kid with, like, exing out of, like, buying a porn on your TV.

I, like, tried to X out so fast that it was. wouldn't register that I bought it. I've done that. And I was like, oh, fuck. This is junk. Higher. Have you used one of these? No, I don't have the money. I would. NASA uses this. This is our astronauts.

They put our astronauts on these when they come back from space. You think that. I know this. This is I know. I bought astronaut underwear. I have underwear they astronauts. Wait, yeah, you always wear astronaut underwear. It's expensive. What's that? It's the underwear that astronauts use. I don't know. But what's it do?

How is it different than regular underwear? That's above my understanding. I don't know. Have you felt a difference since you started wearing astronaut? No, it's not something you noticed. It's just something that's... Well, then shit, dude. How much is a pair of astronaut underwear?

$40? One pair? Yeah. Is it on the alpha brainwaves or the beta? Okay. What are the settings on this machine? Does it sting? Is it like a...

No. It'll warm up problem. It's just a heating pad. No, no, no, no. It's not just a heating pad. This has the crystals. in it. So you have the crystals, you have infrared. You hear what he's saying right now?

Crystals. What's it? What's going to happen? I thought crystals were bullshit too and then my grandma, she's dead now, but she had it. It didn't work. It's already here. No, it was nothing to do with the crystals. But she had one that she would hold and you'd ask it a question and they would start spinning and yes, it would spin clockwise, no, it's been counterclockwise. Oh, you had the magic crystal. You've seen one of the settings

on there? Wait a minute, I don't even know. I'm buying this magic crystal. I don't know. I think only she had it. But you would ask it questions as a boy? She showed me how to use it. Yeah. It's like you, it's a, it's a energy thing. She lived in Sedona next to the vortex that could have been, that could have affected it. But these are huge. If you

ever have trouble falling asleep, if you're sore, if you're coming back from space, get one of these. It's not a heating pad. It's a heating pad. Can somebody lay on it? Tell me what. It's going to get hot. Yeah, you're going to feel warm. That's not what it's worth something. It's like a, what do you call that, a side effect of greatness of

what you're going to get the size of greatness? Yeah, whatever you're getting, you're getting other things. Maybe get on that thing. Is the heating thing the least important part Yes, the least important. It's the only feature. Say I lay on it for a year, then I'll be able to do a cartwheel or something? No, no, no, no.

You ever grounded? You ever walked around and get positive ions from the earth? No, dude. What? Like you walk around with bare feet? Yes, so this is that, like, on steroids. You know, we don't get enough grass here. I burn my whole leg once.

So this is a grass equivalent. I fell on a fire, and I had to heal, and I just stood barefoot. Every day I stood out in my underwear and my bare feet and I ground. I got ions from the earth. To heal? How long did it take to burn to heal? I don't know, a couple of weeks. What?

You ever had a bad burn? Kee, get on. Put ointment on. I don't want to get on it. Why? Did you put anything else on it? It was just ground. I got grabs.

I got to go into the hospital. I fell on a fire. Someone get on it. Why doesn't Donnie just get on? Bobby get on. Don't. Get on. I'm not taking my clothes off.

Then don't have to. Well, to get. It's hard to work. What settings do we have? There's a button that says pimp. Another that says Eon. Wait, pimp? Yeah.

But yeah, do the pamp. Oh, it's really stiff. At least roll your stuff. sleeves up. Yeah, it's like, I'm not going to get the effects of it. So take your shirt off? No, come on. I'm not to take my pants off.

Wait, you don't, that's a miserable. How that works. You won't take your shirt off because you have to be here for a while. But look, there's a whole. For a while for what? Yeah, the lights are going crazy. Yeah, how do you know you've been there long enough?

Wait, don't. Stay there. You're doing well. It's like a, you know how you naturally heal something? It takes your body has to get reconditions to it. Is it vibrating? No, you don't feel simple. So, Donnie, it helps your brain.

You want to test that? And you want this thing to take and just, and you'll lay on it. Lie on it every day. I'm not laying on. I just want to touch it. I just don't understand. I mean, a second, like, if you can't, most people can afford this, understandably, but you can just get a shockty mat. You can get a mat that has, it's like lying on the bed of needles. And that's supposed to help, too, with circulation. But this is like, this is the best you can get.

Those little metal poles. Is that what that is going all the way across? Those are crystals. So how would you use? Oh, those are the crystals. Those are the crystals. How would you use this in your daily or weekly routine or monthly routine? Before bed, if you want to unwind, if you can boost serotonin, you can boost. You can boost serotonin.

If you had one of these, you would do what? You would use it every night? Before bed, yeah. So you unwind by, like, laying down? Lined down. And then in the mornings, if you want the serotonin boost, you can do a different setting for serotonin. Wow. What's it do to boost your serotonin?

Again, that's waves. It's sending waves. you're asking somebody who doesn't know how it works but I know how what it does That's not that's not funny mark It's not it's not a joke So describe you know what it does but not how mark It's I know that it does positive it improves your life is like I know it's Look how about this? Let me put it this way you could not use it or you could use it and if you don't tell the difference you might as well use it

It's like religion. It's like religion. Your weight sacrificing time. Anybody want to break that sentence? Brandon, that's not confusing. No. It's like it's the same as like. You could not use it or use it. If you don't tell a difference either way, you might as well use it.

You could have options again. But what if like during the time I would be doing this, I would be studying a language? You can lie down and study a language. And also not paying $1,500. You're saying it, yeah, so you're proving my point. It could help you with a language by lying down studying it. You're going to get doubled a effect. So it's a mat.

It's a heating pad. It's a small mattress. And it's simple as form, I'm sure. If that's like saying, oh, that's a chair. It's the same. Oh, it is. That's not a good example. You guys aren't helping me out here.

I'm getting railroaded. That was a really good description of that chair. It's like being agnostic. That's my point. It's like it's the same. You can choose to believe in a God or not, but it's better if you're going to go to hell. or you're not going to go to hell.

Well, price, the financial burden and the time that you could be exercising instead. It's not an exercise. It's not going to get you in shape. You have to sacrifice time. You know non-sleep be abreast? It's like that. It's like that. What's non-sleeping?

Okay, Donnie, if Dan gives us to you in three months, you better be better, a better version of yourself. You better be the best version. Yeah, sure. You promised that. Well, what do you want in exchange? We never got to the trade. You started out by saying you want something for me. Absolutely nothing. This is junk. You can ask.

It was this dumbest purchase of ever made in my life. You don't want to get some free chef meals? Sure. A chef yak meal. Sure. Cook me some. Dip week. Dip week. Make your best dips. Dip week. Dips. Every day a different dip. Okay. I can do dip week.

Okay. This is yours. But hold on. Wait. We're talking good dips. Of course. Your best dips. Your five best dips. Okay. I'll do my five best. I owe you a soup too. You owe us a soup. You owe us a fucking soup. Right. I owe you soup. Monday I'll do soup. I want, yo me, lasagna, Franklin.

Hold on. We're not done. How about that? Jesus. You're in debt. I want dip week to be topless. Topless dip week. Whoa, whoa. You're not ready for that? Me?

Yeah. Most dip weeks are topless. I want you to be fucking eye candy for everyone. You're a hunk. But what about, like, what are those things called you put over the nipples? Yeah, you can put tassels over the naces. Tasties. Tasties. I have to cook naked.

I have to cook a shirtless. Well, no, you don't have to take. get naked. You have a problem of separating shirtless and naked. Yeah. Because if you're at your shirt off, you might as well either, it's the same thing. No. No, because I don't see your cock when you're All right, you know what? Topless is out because I'm worried that you're going to just get naked.

Let's see. Just need to poo it. If you have your shirt off, you might as well be fully naked. Dip week. It's like calling this chair. I like dip week, but what else? What else can we get? Yeah, you don't want that. We can do better than dips. Dips so you can get. We need Dip week, though. Because we've been promised to dip week for a while. That's like my dream dips. Meal, like a bunch of great dips and, like, some breads to dip it in.

Kate's dream is to open a dip restaurant. Yep, rotating. Thank you, Brandon. Sure. Well, Kate doesn't have very good dreams. What do you really want? I think I just want dip week. No.

All right, can we have an open-ended meal to be named later? Of course. Yeah, that's fine. Okay, one meal to be named later. This is my meal, by the way, Brandon. I know you just co-opted that as your... The yak meal to be named later. possibly at my house.

No, this is my meal. I get one meal to be named later in DIP Week. Easy. That's easiest trade ever. Well, it's easiest trade ever because you could have had it for free. Right. Yeah. And it's John. Well, it's fine.

Did we not buy this? You're going to take this home tonight? Oh, yeah. You're going to actually lay on this? Guys, I don't understand why this is like a, if you were given us a mat that the astronauts you use from NASA, would you not lie on it? Where are you seen? He makes a good point. I'm on your side.

I'm on your side. Are those not our finest? Are those not our brightest minds? He's right. Right. Right again. Sometimes I assume an astronaut sleeps on a normal bed too.

I'm going to take my mad and need. He's never going to understand. He's disgusted right now. Thanks. Big Cat, thank you very much. I'd love it. I'd love it.

I'd love it. I'm happy you have it. If you do, can you do it like, how many hours are you going to lay on it? I don't know. Whatever's safe. Whatever's safe. Whatever's safe.

We're going to have to feel silly. No, no, No, no, no, let him work. Let him work. You're manhandling it. It's a tricky. It's still plugged in. Yeah, it's still. No, you're going to have to unplug it. It's something.

Careful. The crystals are hot. Christ. Someone might have to start following this guy around. There was a case somewhere. I don't know. It's the most junk science thing ever.

Donnie, if you can lay on this every day this weekend. You would. Back to us Monday. We just called science, and that's it. We should. It's all science. Brandon, I love it. so much. He hates my fucking.

He hates my guns. Dude, Mark with a hard case. What have you done? He's fucking. What have you done to him? The whole room laughs. He turns of me and says, Mark. Funny, Mark. Oh, Donnie. You just dropped some bread right on the...

Another fun outfit. Donnie, are you ready for your presentation? What time you want? Right now. Okay. It's on a powerful. Great. Okay. Do I have to hook it up and shit? Well, yeah, yeah.

Send it to DJ. What are you doing with that? Bring in the machine and hook it up. We should have seen what he would have done, what he would have hooked up. And why don't you ask him if this is different from the one he had prepped last? Oh. Do you have someone help him out? No, I think he hasn't worked on it since last.

Oh. The last time he was in here, he said he did it in the last 30 minutes. And then you were like, yeah, just do it next time. I don't know if he used the extension. Right. The Matt's been working. Truly. In what way?

see the findings. What's that? I'm excited to see your findings. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, it's not about, the presentation is more about what it is, less about my findings. Well, wasn't it the presentation is supposed to be about your findings? No, I said, told you guys, findings take a months or at least. So you just did a book report on what they sell it as? A tutorial on a mat. You don't read the description. That was the, that was the assignment, I thought. The assignment was you use it and tell us what it's like. Well, that's going to be another month then. What? It takes a month. I'll show you in the presentation. I've, I talk about it. I talk about, You don't need to be defensive yet.

Yeah, well, there'll be more than enough time for you. You asked to put a presentation together on what these mats do. You just went to their website and got their information. I didn't use their website one. What did you use? The internet, the other shit, everything else. Everything else? Well, you should have used their website.

That feels like it was right there, bro. Why do you need ESPN.com to help you with this? The presentation is on the map. mats and their benefit and you know why we all should be using there's no copying and pasting from anywhere there's a little bit so did you refine this after i gave you an extension no that's no okay that's i that's on me i didn't yeah i didn't go back but i it's so why you show us the description are you then going to describe what it's done for you at all can we can we can we run this through a plagiarism check yeah turn it in dot com yes no i don't

I'm in this. All right, we just did. I changed most of it, so it's in my own words. Donnie, would you like to attend Max's bachelor party? Oh, yes, I'd love to. Okay. Actually? Yeah.

We're throwing them one. PMT's throwing them one. Fuck yeah. It's not his real bachelor party. Either one I'm happy to go to. Okay. That's huge, actually. Holy shit.

Where are you going? You're going to be the stripper. Yeah. Sounds awesome. Sick. Hell yeah. What a day. Well, how's it happened?

Just kidding. Just began. Well, all right, so the presentation's ready. I sent Tj. JJ, did you get my, did you get the link? Yeah, I'm having trouble signing up for this website. It's Prezzi. What? Huh?

You never used Prezzi? No. The presentation website? Have you? Back in the day, in my school days, Prezzie was the fucking, that was the best way to make a presentation. It's like a more interactive PowerPoint. How far away were you from getting a degree? Are you like 15 credits?

That's what, that's a semester? Two. Okay. One and a half, yeah, probably one and a half. It's usually, 15 is pretty standard. Yeah, so. Yeah, I guess it's. Four classes, five?

It's a semester. Yeah, that's a semester, right? Yeah, I feel like you get like, what is three credits of class? 15 is the norm. Take four or five classes? Yeah, so I was 15 away. A semester. Okay, so this is your...

This is Prez. and this thing I did the free trial but I forgot to cancel so this is a $200 presentation This one's expensive So please Oh fuck History of the smart

Is that your project? No I think those are That's me, that's mine Yeah we're kind of stuck in this loop Try it again So maybe you go sign in Sign sign in Do you want to sign in?

Try it again That'd help Yeah can you just sign in back there Yeah I can sign in back there Oh let me sign Prezzy, come on, T.J. Prezzi is, I mean... How do you not know Prezzi?

Yeah, I don't know why T.J. does know Prezzi. Prezzy is awesome. This is kind of embarrassing, Donnie. Sorry about this. We've never done this for our guest before. Yeah. The door. Just use the door. Is this your first day in the office?

Every day is like... He came in throwing fucking 99, man. Yeah. This door? This door thing right here? And that's just going to let me enter another room. Wait. Just gonna make a fucking hole in the wall, Mark. You wanna pull on this rectangle?

He's gonna be in another fucking room, Mark. This time traveling machine? What the fuck is his door? Is that what you're telling me? It's used every other website except the website that has the information. Yeah. It's also the website.

It is the internet. Like, I think we're just going to watch the slideshow from the actual company's website. It's going to be all stolen from the website. He's explaining to us what a man. Wow. That's a bob sled.

That's your graphic. See. Oh, how did you get on this? That's not an astronaut. Certainly not. Are the words in there? Are we supposed to be reading the small words? What are those tiny little words? Yeah, what are the tiny little words?

Let him present it. A prezi looks like you in there. I got you, Donnie. Donnie, why is the astronaut Not on a sled. Why is he naked? Why is he on a bob? He's on a toboggan?

Come to get back in here. It's supposed to be, look, a guy sitting on a mat. Did you design that? You were in that room. You designed that. I told AI how to do what I was looking for. That's AI. You said astronaut on a toboggin?

I said astronaut on a mat with electromagnetic field going around. What's underneath the mat? I don't know. Those are the toboggins. If I had time to refine, I would have gotten rid of that shit. You did have time. This is from the Apple Vision. If I used my time well, yeah.

He gave you an extension. I know, but that's like school. You ever had an extension in school? And you go, oh, fuck, I didn't do it. I didn't use that. That's kind of what I did here. Okay, so, TJ. Wait, wait.

Exploring the cognitive benefits of PMF Mats, come with me on a brief journey through. Through it wasn't necessary. What? All right. Wait, go back. I want to see that. Just first slide, please.

First click. First click. Just no, no, just click anywhere. No. Are you ready to change your life? Are you going to read it? Are you ready to change your life? Okay, thank you.

Yes. I'm going to say yes. Sign me up for that. One more click, please. Did anything happen? Click the arrow, maybe. One more click, please. Looking at you, Mark.

I was raising my hand. All right, so this is me using the mat. This is, and I covered it. everything up. Who took the picture? Is it your neighbor? No, my roommate took this picture. Are you fully naked or an underwear? That's, I'm fully using the mat. You have to make the logo that big.

Is the NASA logo built under Prezzi? Can we move that right? No, that's unmovable. So this is how you use the mat and this is... Wait, so your roommate took a picture of you with your cock and balls out? We're close, yeah. Okay. What are the goggles for? Those are my night, those are I wear those before going to bed, too. This is my nighttime

routine. Yeah, 100. I want to get some. See? Yeah, I'll send you a link. There's a lot of shit out there. It's so easy, man. Why do you want to be... Why he won't go home? No, you'll... No, he's right.

You have trouble sleeping, don't you? Yeah, I do. Let me get 20 minutes of your time. I would love that. I do have trouble sleep. I know you, I know Nick, I know you struggle with sleep. I'm great at sleep. Nope, just the other day.

We were riding the car and you go to Kylie. You go, fuck, man. I'm always tired. I am always tired. And then, okay. And then KB, whose fit as a fiddle goes, fuck, me too, man. So this is you guys should both be sleeping on mats because the you know no no I don't want to sleep

I want the goggles you should be falling asleep this is you should be that should be my bed So we're not what time do you put on the goggles well like if I want to go to bed at 10 I put them on 830 All right what do the goggles do they're blue light blockers yeah so it starts producing melatonin in your in your brain already so your brain thinks you're shutting down ready for sleep and you you'll notice right away you're tired Would it be the same effect with just classes? No no no no you have to block the blue the physical blue light out yeah you can't I like the goggles because then there's a lot of you're just the goggles because then there's no light that gets... So if you were sitting without the goggles from 8 to 10, you wouldn't be naturally... No, but if you're on your phone, if you're

fucking looking at screens and shit, like it's... You're not going to be able to fall asleep. At least I have I'm in. It does help. And you get used to watching, if you're watching anything, it looks a little orange, but you'll get used to it. It's worth being able to fall asleep on command. You're watching everything in the arm. Do you sleep, let me ask you question. Do you sleep naturally? Do you take any additives? Do you take any sedative? Unisom. See? Okay, we're going to throw that away. You're not going to

be sleeping like a baby, naturally. You're going to use the mat. You're going to use the goggles, you're going to do the routine, you'll be good to go. Naturally with all this tag. Well, Dave is Matt to you. The natural. Well, that is natural. It's a natural way of getting it. Yeah. What do you mark?

Okay. Back to the slide. Okay. To understand PEMFs, we must first understand EMFs. Do we all pay attention? That says to PEMFs, we must first understand EMS. No, it says undertanned. Undertanned.

To PEMFs, we must first under tanned. EMFs. I really should have fucking reviewed this. To understand PEMFs, we must first understand EMFs. Is that how that should read? Okay. All right. Next slide.

What are EMFs? Wait, that's... Okay. Yeah. This is a reminder to yourself. My teachers always would say, don't put a lot of words on the presentation. If you didn't write, tell them about EMFs, you'd be so lost right here. You would have any idea what to say.

This is for me. So you guys shouldn't even be seeing that. Okay, so what are EMFs? EMFs are electromagnetic fields. The Earth is full of them. Naturally, we have two. Okay, north and south pole. But EMFs, you're going to get them from Wi-Fi.

You're going to get it from 5G. You're going to go. Next slide. Please, you're going to get them from what else do I have on there. Cell phones. So these are good. No, these are bad. These are bad.

All bad. No, there are some good ones. But these are ionizing. You know what ionizing means? No. It's bad. It's answer causing. Oh, fuck.

What's a that? The H-bomb? I have that in my house. What's an act? Et cetera, et cetera. No, that's not right at all. Yes, it is. It's like TC, dude.

What did you put? ATC. He put ECT. So close. ETC. Fuck it. All right. So, back to.

Wait, wait. H bombs are bad? Yeah, but H bombs are the highest form of the radiation, ionizing radiation. What do we ever encounter an H-bomb? That's just fucking giving you example. What about the cyber truck? The cyber truck I wasn't sure about. I wasn't sure.

That one, I'm not going to lie, I just put that one on there because I said maybe. Home phone, maybe. So these are things that you can find. Home phone, maybe. Again, they're going to radiate electromagnetic field. But this is ionizing, so it's bad. Why are we in a different language on the right? Again.

Electro-magneticas and mechanicas? Yeah, that's probably, that's Spanish, it looks like. Did you? I didn't check that either. Okay. All right, next slide. So EMFs are bad, okay? But what the mad is doing, okay, yeah, health risk, look at it.

They're really fucking bad. Talk about the 49. 49er. I can't get 49. And I don't know how to spell any. Me all of our fingers. He doesn't know how to spell a word. The 49ers, this is a perfect example.

You see everyone getting knee injuries. Wait, top 49er YouTuber? That guy is not a top 49er YouTuber? This is a screen grab I got from one of those YouTube videos I was watching. Look, but their practice facility right next to the PowerPoint. What's coming out of that? EMF, EMF, EMF, EMF, DMF, damaging your cells, ionizing radiation. Bad news.

Don't want it. Okay? They get disproportionate amounts of injuries compared to other teams. Yeah. They actually don't statistically. Don't stop in there. Well, they don't. Let them go.

Okay. This is, we're... I think they were the fourth most injured team? Fine. So maybe that's not... Okay. What are the health risks? It's more about the health risks.

What are they? Kyle, the 49ers, by the way, the problem... the 49ers have is they have a lot of good players and when the good players get injured everyone's like oh fuck okay so they don't players so that's more of you have good players and a couple of get injured you're like

oh man this must be a problem shines the light sure okay look that's why if I built the team I would never have good play but donnie yours is less about physical this is not even the point I haven't even gotten to my point yet we're talking about EMF the mad is a PEMF PEMF PEMF POMF Pulsed Electromagnetic frequency. But isn't that bad?

No. So, EMFs are bad. But some are good. You can get non-ionizing EMFs are good. Low-frequency waves. Those are all high-frequency waves. That's too much. Radiation Home phones, maybe. Yes. CyberTruck. Home phones. So lower radiation is

the non-ionizing, the negative ions you're going to get from the ground. I'll get to you a second. You're going to get from the ground. You're going to get from the earth. You're going to get naturally low frequency. Please hold your question. ionizing. Brandon, question. So if you're around all these EMFs all day, you can't avoid them really, computers, cell phone towers, all that. If you're around them all day, how does being around them at a lower dose at night helpful? We'll get that.

We'll get to there. Sorry. Sorry. That's coming up. Because there are different kinds of waves. You want the lower frequency waves are good. So you're fighting the waves. You're kind of reversing the waves.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Lower frequency, beta. Oh, my God. Beta, theta. He's fighting waves. He's a wave flag. Oh, shit.

Yeah, we are, yeah. EMFs are waves. Oh, my God. It's the eternal wave. EMF. Guys, I'm lost. I don't understand it if you're doing some jokes.

We were fine with, yeah. We found a cooler version of you that was in Australia. It might be. Great. The Australians are my favorite people. So, let's go to the next slide, please. Okay.

I thought you loved the French. I do, yes. I connect most with them, but Australians, I think, are the coolest. Understand P. EMF, a new frontier. And what is that an image of? What's she doing? She's using that math.

This is the mat we have. So PEMF, pulse electromagnetic fields. Pulsome electromagnetic frequency, I think. I like her. So this is what we're going to do. So we're going to get all those bad EMFs out of your system. And we're going to pulse, we're going to put good ones in, the ones that you need. Those are my butt cheeks.

I like that. I got to be honest. I like bad EMS. Okay. You know what, Mark, you're going to have a short time on this planet then. Next slide, T. She's a bad EMS. Oh, yeah.

Okay. the benefits of PEMF therapy. Who's reading these words? Oh, yeah, okay. Okay. It's Prezzi. Reduces pain and inflammation. All right.

So what is pain? Kate, pain and inflammation. Something you know plenty about. Suggested for Kate. Me on the bench. Yeah, this. Chronic pain. Was that a prompt to yourself?

Yes, yes. Yes. So Kate, I would suggest you sleep on a mat. I would at least start your day with it. Okay. Because you know what? If everything hurts, you can't hurt to try something new. That's true.

That's true. And look at Kate. If you see to the right of that, the words, it has pain Xed out. That's good. I love that image. But those who say no pain or pain, Donnie. Yes, well, a certain level of pain is necessary. Not, you know, maybe in childhood, but once you're an adult.

What do you mean in childhood? Childhood. Childhood pain is good. Growing pains, yeah, you know, adult, becoming of age. But lifting weights, you know, a certain pain that you need to reach to... Sure, but this, we're talking about chronic pain. We're talking about pain that you don't want. We're talking about pain. Chronic pain should be reserved for children.

Yeah. They're the only ones. We're getting distracted. We're getting distracted. We are getting distracted. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sir. That's on Mark. So, yeah, Mark, please stop distracting us.

These targeted, these pulse electromagnetic frequencies can help, you know, reduce inflammation and reduce pain. How are they doing that? because it's, you know. Yeah, good point. Donnie, do you have inflammation in pain? No, because I sleep on the mat. I use the mat. What about before you have the mat until a week ago?

Right, then I had some, you know, every now and then I have pain. That's not chronic. I use it more for sleep and we'll get to sleep. You're sleeping on this thing? No, I'm pre-sleeping on it. I use the beta. I use the beta frequency. Pre-sleeping meaning of waste?

I'm awake. I'm awake. Am I pre-sleeping right now? We all are. free sleep it's like it's pre-sleep more potent than real sleep this is what I do

40 minutes before I go to bed 40 to 20 to 20 at least 20 I set it to the first frequency which is the beta frequency number one which you're getting the lowest waves and that's putting your body into a sleep like state where you're I have the goggles on I have the waves

at the beta phase and I'm naked and it's warm so you're drifting off and I put in my headphones I put frequency 432 Hertz 432 Hertz. And that's on what? Spotify.

You can get that on YouTube. What does that sound like? It's hard to describe it. Can we get that? Are we allowed to play? It's a tone. It's a tone. Yeah, you should be able to play.

It's relatively free. And it'll put you, that tone puts you to sleep. It's another thing in your brain. You can see 432? Yeah. So you put on goggles and lay on the mat to get yourself ready for sleep. But a lot of people, if they just lay in the bed for 40 minutes, that gets them ready for sleep. Right.

Well, this is, yep. That's the frequency. Oh, now, wait a minute. I don't mind this at all. That's pretty good. It's actually pretty good. See? This and the goggles and the mat is, and you'll dream like fucking hell.

You'll dream crazy. That sounds bad. Oh, good dreams. Dream like hell. Oh, I can see how this could put me to sleep. Yeah. Especially a little. Wait, what's that?

That's the frequency. Oh, that's the worst part. That sucks. Get that all. You're making it buzz funny. What? How is he doing that? You didn't touch it.

Oh, because T.J's doing it. That's it? I don't use this one. but that's what you said 432 yeah that's pure tone i use one with a little bit like with a little sound kicked in with it well any of these they're like they lost 12 hours so it's a rookie mistake using pure tone yeah oh this is good yep because this has four for this has 432 in it i like this pretty good i don't want to then have to nakedly get myself up well stand up my pad unplug my stuff roll my Pat up and then go to bed.

So this is what I do. I keep my pad under my bed. I slide it out, like almost like a trundle bed to begin. And I have it right next to my bed. And I have the lights off. I'm lying there doing that. Phone's already plugged in. You have your goggles on with the lights off?

Well, it starts with them on in my, like, apartment, whatever. And once I go to the mat, I have them on. I had them on for that. It's pre-goggled. Yeah, yeah. And then if I have my night light on, I keep some lights. You're a night light? Like the nightstand light.

Nightstand light. Like an Elmo nightlight or something? What's going on? What's going on? And then I pop right up from when it's time to go to bed. When I've had enough, I roll basically right into bed and that's it. It gets you. I mean, look.

And this is all that. But you still have to unplug? No, I don't unplug. You leave it on all right? The matty, I just switch off. What have your dreams been like? This is very, super vivid. Very, very vivid.

It's like an example of your most recent dream. I don't like talking dreams. Okay. Yeah. I would like you brought them up. A little bit of dream. No, I don't like talking about the dreams. Can we talk a little.

Right. I want you to pitch the dreams that we're going to get with this product. That's all. That's completely interesting. Are they good dreams? Dreams is a big selling point. It's a whole other presentation. If you want to die.

I would like a personal anecdote. Dreams I should be looking forward to or scary dreams? Donnie, can you make us a dream log? Yes, please. I've been trying actually because I had a lucid dreaming phase where I would try, it was very, very addicted to trying to get to that stage. So I did keep a dream journal. This was years ago.

But I could try to do that again. I want a full, so next Wednesday, I want you to come back on, and I want a full week of everything you remember from your dreams. Okay, I can do that. On Prezzi. Yeah, I mean, I fucking paid for it, all right? Obviously, yeah, we got a lot of Prezzi. So this is, we're going to have a lot of Prezies. Yep, New Seat, weekly segment locked in.

Okay, let's get back to the Prezzi. Obviously. Yeah, let's please get back to the Prezzi. Okay, so, yeah. Kate could be great. Okay. Okay, great. What's that top image?

Yeah. That's a guy in a hell of a pain. Yeah, he's going through it. He is. He's going through it. God damn. That poor man. That poor fucking dude.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, no. He's not even he either. Annie, get back.

And this is about to help Dan. This could be good for Danny It's you fucking never know You can't put talk about Day's answer Make a wish question mark Make a wish question mark What bullet point is that?

I'm gonna say right now This was not AI No I don't think you copy To beaded waste It's pure human buffoonery Talk about Danny's cancer Yeah

Make a wish All right The floor is yours Yeah we should probably wait Do not, do not, Brandon, while we wait for Danny to get back. Danny, we're waiting on you to come back. You're going to want to see this next slide. I should have raised my hand to ask if I can go back.

Yeah, you're going to want to see this next slide. The slide right here. Okay. Gotcha. Are you reading all of it? Enhances, yeah. All right, so we know this wasn't. Well, chef, talk about Danny's cancer.

Enhance's cellular repair and regeneration. So what is cancer? Cellular decay. Is that a picture of cancer? Is that a cancer? Is that why they call it? call it that. I guess that's a good name for it.

Is that what yours are? Yeah. It's not for me. Oh, fuck, it looks like cancer. It just spells out cancer. Yeah, I mean, we all know. That's crazy. That's pretty fucking crazy.

What should you fucking call this? Seeing a doctor under a telescope being like, whoa, okay. Yeah. No, that's cancer right there. That's definitively cancer. That must be it. And you use a picture where I look. Can we get a second opinion?

Yeah. Also, Danny, did you not do me? wish because make a haunting to see in an X rate puts it up

and turns it on the light and just fucking says cancer in your body why is there a question

mark after make a wish so well you did a make a wish correct correct had you wish

for a mat we could have stopped all of this someone who's dying of terminal disease certainly couldn't get a mat on their own

had you wish for a mat All of this would have You wish for a Matt You never had to meet the office You didn't have to meet you. Yeah You used your one make-a-wish on seeing a sitcom

When a mat was right there Everyone had to make Steve Correll I could have paid 30 bucks for a mat I mean $1,500 Oh,500 Yeah 30 would have lost it

But It's a good It's so The mat can I'm not going to say 30-30 We would have lost it We bought a $30

Matt Yeah Who would have lost them So So this can be used instead of chemotherapy? I'm not saying it cures cancer. I don't want to be on the record saying this will cure cancer. Correct.

So what is this slide? This slide is, you know, if potentially you could rebuild your cells before you get cancer. Okay. This is more, yeah, honestly, I take that back. The make-a-wish probably would have been too late. You put a question mark, so I think you're good. Yeah. You're just asking questions.

Yeah, I'm just throwing out. This is more of a hypothesis. It's a slide. Would you be interested in like, an initiative to raise money to donate. I do a grant, yeah, I take a grant. Donate Matt. Who, you take a grant to do research.

So you. You take the money. Big Cat, please. I might have to fund this grant. Jeff Donnie doing medical research. That'd be nice, actually. Yeah, we could do a whole side project where I just do science. I like that.

Do science. Yeah, let's. Donnie does science. I have one request. I would like a presi on what you need for the grant. Trust me. The do science prezzi by chef Doni. Oh, what I'd use the money for?

Yeah, yeah, I want to do science. Like, here's what I will science. Sure, like a sabbatical, prosa. Almost. How much progress do you think you would get on, like, learning about cancer and ways to fight? Cancer seems out, I feel like there's a... There's enough people working on cancer, so I think I'm going to tackle something less. So I should have used my dying wish on a mat a year before getting cancer.

But, oh, expensive mat. Well, Danny, we can't go back and... Y'all that just... That's what I'm trying to tell. Glossing over the line, there's enough people working on cancer. Yeah. Tough people. That one's covered.

We got to... But I would like to see what you would... I'm willing to give you a grant. Okay. To do science. Sick. But I need to know what science you're going to do. What field do you care of the field?

I want you to decide. Okay. A cause you believe in. So I want... But I need a presi. Okay, I'll do it like Shark Tank. Yeah, okay. Yeah, Donnie's do science presentation.

Okay. I like it Donnie do sign. And I'll list out everything I'll use the budget for. I'll make a detailed look. Perfect. Cool. When can I expect that? Do I already have one to do next week?

Yeah. Yeah, you got the Dreams one. Okay, so. Maybe after the Super Bowl, we got to do science. Perfect. I'll use that week to do a lot of. Perfect. You're going to use none of that week.

I'll use some of that week. No, you're going to end up doing it like two hours before the act. Yeah, but that's when I do my best work, I think. No, this has been A plus present. Pretty good. This is how I did it in school. The school is a little more refined, I think, but

always did well. Yeah. Ish. Ish. Well, we'll wait to the end to see if you guys are I don't understand wrong. Yeah, we're only halfway through. Cancer.

So, Danny, hindsight's 20-20, but this one... That's all I got for that. But you fucked up. I should have used a mat. You're right. Okay. Next. An improved sleep. Okay.

Oh, wow. she's really sleeping she's tired look how tired she is tired are you sure she's not acting no this is the best presentation I've ever seen so look how tired I didn't see that she looks really tired

you zoom it on her TJ yeah no presi don't it'll fuck everything up if you try to you know Presi $200 you can't zoom can't handle Zoom it fucks everything I would have had to put a Zoom feature in on I miss that but if we could see how tired she looked.

But no, honestly, you know, all laughs aside, this is the reason I use the mat is for sleep. For how tired you are. This is this. I've struggled with sleep, you know,

I was like you. I couldn't sleep. So she's not using a mat. She looks very comfortable sleeping. She's not, you don't sleep on the mat. You lie on it before. You pre-sleep.

So you think she did use it? Probably, yeah. She could have. She could have. That's the possibility is not zero. Look how tired, Brandon. Look how tired, Brandon? And I do, yeah, I don't like the fact that the lights are on. It makes it look faker, but you get to, yeah, not the watermark over her face. Yeah. Yeah, that was, I couldn't get that thing off. What did you search for this? I don't remember. I think just super tired lady.

Look out tired, Mark. Okay, I like, this is a good slot. So the sleep is the biggest thing. Because I know, I know you struggle with sleep. I know you struggle with sleep. I don't know how you sleep. I'd assume pretty well. Because I see you, I know you nap, you do naps here. So you might not be, but you could always sleep better. You could always sleep better. That's what I always. It's a silent killer. They don't talk about that enough.

Sleep. You mean lack of sleep. Sleap. Yeah, lack of sleep is a silent killer. Can I just ask a quick question, though, are we, so are we attacking bad sleep or cancer? Cancer is more of a hypothesis. Cancer is not on the top of mind. So we're put cancer on the back part.

If I could eliminate one, is am I trying to eliminate bad sleep? cancer. So you're going to eliminate bad sleep and as a byproduct of that you're going to eliminate cancer. Oh, we'll get the cancer on the back. It's a run down from bad. It passively helps with cancer. Collateral damage from the... I think sleep and muscle regeneration is what this is used for primarily.

But look, you got, you have kids, you have kids, Kate, you have kids, Mark, congrats, you have a kid. Thanks, next to a kid. Stephen Chase's got kids. Stephen Jay in the booth, yeah. So this is an age-old question. Taylor's all the time. Fucking, how hard is it

to get those little rat fuckers asleep. Oh, rat fuckers. The hardest, Donnie. It's a well put. Rat fuckers never go to sleep, dude, it's the worst.

I can't get my ratfuckers. That's the age old question. I'm so sick of these rat fuckers. Oh, the vintage conundrum. Congrats on your little rat fucker. I got three rat fuckers and they never sleep. Dude, I got rat fuckers all over my house.

Try this. Try this. Put them on. Put them on the mat. Do you read on bedtime? Do you do a bedtime story? Yes. Put them on the mat.

Try this. No, I'm not putting my kids on the fucking mat. Try this. Try the one. If they're wanting to make them sick crisscross applesauce on the mat. Read them a bedtime story. They'll probably fall. Fuckers will just go right to bed. So they'll put them if they're being rambunctious and if they're being crazy, put them on the mat. If they're rambunctious, how am I going to get them on the mat? Say, you got to make it like a game. You got to gamify it for them. How would you do that? Say, oh, you've seen Aladdin's magic carpet. Say, hey, look at this. Hey, you little rat fucker. Get on this mat. Because the dial of it, the dial of the machine, it looks like a space, it's a science. It looks like science. Would the kids take the same dosage as I would take?

I don't want my kid to overdose on. Put them on for less time, I think. Yeah. But I don't think you can overdose. I haven't gotten to that part of it. I think we just, by the way, I think we accidentally just figured out something. You said it looks like science. Yeah.

Yeah. And that's what's trapped you. That's, I think, the allure here. Oh, no. That's how they got you. Okay. okay if it's a couple flashing lights and a dial and Connie's like well science cord okay well if it walks like a duck and he quacks like a duck what is it a rat fucker a rat fucker yeah so same thing

applies to this is there an age that's too young but what does science look like fucking graphs and shit I don't know would you put a what you put a pregnant woman on this I don't see that's where yeah probably actually I didn't think of it you'd make such a good doctor Yeah. Would you put someone who's pre-rat-fucker on that? Yeah, I would. It's better than her smoking or drinking. Yeah, true. Good point. Gotta do one or the other.

If you have to. I've been thinking about that. Everyone who's pregnant has to do one. And I've been thinking about it. It's like, what? Should I go out? Put my rap fuckers on this mat or give him heroin? Yeah. So I'm going mad.

They have to do one. Yeah. It could be similar to like a dolphin, a dolphin birth where if you put a lady on this mat, the kid could be super smart. What the fuck? That's what I was saying. They banned. They banned.

I'm sorry, yes. Wait. I feel like I'm on drugs. You never heard of this? What? Dolphin birthing? This is the best presentation ever. This is like this might be getting close to fire salamander billy stuff.

Yeah, this is. So this, so dolphin birthing, we're getting sidetracked, but dolphin birthing, it's illegal now. So it's hard to find, but someday I'll try to do it. It's when you have your kid, if your wife is pregnant, your lady friend or whatever, she's pregnant. And you want to have the kid. You do it in the ocean with dolphins circling. And the theory is, don't laugh. The theory is the sonar, the shit that dolphins give off while the kid is being born gives it like fucking superpowers.

No. Why? Nobody's ever done this. Yes. DJ, look it up. It's in the ocean circle by dolphins? How do you get the dolphins around? You go to like a cove.

You go to like a shop. Why? You got to find a cove with dolphins? Why? How do you plan on orchestrating? How do the dolphins go off? Are they trained dolphins? Yes.

Every mom wants her baby's birth special. A few would go as far as Sarah Evans, whose dream was to give birth with dolphins of midwives. Yeah, this is the nine dream. So I think a kid got eaten. Like a... They stopped. But there's a theory out there that the kids are sharks, honey.

Oh, fuck. We forgot about the kid. It's a risky. But the theory is if the kid survived, he would have been a super here. Like a savant, like a fuck. I have another time out. How the fuck did that one? article from 1990 come across your radar.

36 years ago. I go down some rabbit holes. About birth. I don't know. I get into some weird things. Hold it in a little longer. Honey, the dolphins are coming.

One day you want to try this? Yeah, if I wanted my kid to be smart as hell. I'm sidetrack. Big Cat, you need to fund this. Oh, no. Do science. I need do science so bad. It actually is like going to be,

we're going to make a whole franchise out of Donnie does sign. Well, apparently, there's a theory. It's illegal now because the CIA and the people are worried they kids will get too smart. That's not the reason. That's not the reason, Donnie. How do you? Or could it be because a kid got easy?

Where do you? I'm up with this shit. My whole algorithm is like babies, birth. I have never heard of that. They shut it down because the CIA thought the kids would be too smart. Something. I'm paraphrasing.

I'm paraphrasing. How would you get the dolphins to circle? Because dolphins are, they're smart. They do, they. You've been to Sea World. You see Dolphins circling all the time. They're in a tank, Donnie.

See, look at this. Yes. Boom. Our man named Igor Tchaikovsky assisted in over 20,000 underwater births. Eventually began experimenting with women giving birth in the ocean in 1979 when preparing with his team for an underwater birth in the Black Sea and a few feet of water. Suddenly three dolphins approached the pregnant woman,

pushed everyone out of the way and took over. They scanned the length of her body up and down with sonar while relaxing the mother and swimming in circles around her. The mother gave birth to the child effortlessly, painlessly. Without fear, this began multiple projects with dolphin-assisted births that spread worldwide. And as you can see, that is obviously from a medical journal. That's science. Johnny, buddy.

Look at that. They got the whole. Have you seen this graphic? How do we get here? Yeah, what are you depicting exactly what I was talking about? Yeah. Looks like a perfect picture. But this guy did 20,000 of them?

I don't know. Tchaikovsky didn't. Underwater birth. That's something when I read. But not with animals. Yeah, he just on no water birth. Huh? Yeah, in a tub.

You can do it. In a tub. The CIA's stressing. So your point is, if you use the mat, it's the same as a circle of dolphins. Yeah, how do they get the dolphins? I don't, I'm... Also, at birth, if you're hit with sonar, you get super smart powers? Not power.

We asked you of a pregnant woman who uses. You said no. Not powers. Five seconds, you had walked that back and said, actually, it'll make your kid. You're too smart for the CIA. Yeah, I forgot about the dolphin birthing. So I think the mat. So my point is...

Okay. What was my point Put them on the mat Just Let's get back to this The point is look how tired Look out tired Put the rap fuckers on the mat

In summation Look how tired Rapfugers on the mat And pregnant women We're gonna put check We're gonna put a check next to it We'll come back to that Yeah

What was I Why would we put a check next slide maybe Next slide yes We're gonna come back No the other thing We're done with it Wait one more thing Oh yeah

So just one in doubt When in doubt pull the mat out, that's like a little catchphrase I wanted to say. So for the kids, one and doubt, pull the mat. Just for like tummy time or something like that, not even for sleep purposes. Yeah, dude, just to the kids. So calm down. What about putting the mat in the ocean around the dolphin? Now we're superpowers.

Now we're X-Men. We just made. Yeah, that's, but I don't know. Yeah, electricity and water, no good. No bueno there. Yeah, was that like the Aquaman origin story? Yeah, so this is not. You watch Aquaman.

The problem, no, the problem, the problem is, the problem is, the problem, what you're trying to do now is you guys are, you're going to do, Sonar gives you magic powers, I never said that, and then you're going to make me look like a fool for doing like a... I don't think we're making you look like that. That's not really the part we know it on your own. It's not a superpower. None of this, none of this is a superpower. But you said it makes the baby super smart.

No, no, no, no, the dolphin birth is super power. He's super smarts, but that's, you're not going to shoot. You're not shooting beams. It's the same thing as like this. I've actually always, like, I've always kind of wanted, but not. So you don't believe that. and like somebody that's able to shoot invisible beams No, dumb ass, no.

Well, that's what the fucking bad is, Donnie. Those aren't beans or wavelengths. I've always wanted to, but always, but not always. Like, you get such a bad head injury that you become a savant and something. Yeah, you've wanted a bad head injury. Well, I go, it wouldn't have been, like, some guy, so I wrote a story about a guy that dove head first and a noop.

Guy that dove head first into a pool, and it was the shallow end. Fucked him up. Thought, like, you thought it was going to be brain that, whatever. only thing that came out of it is he could play piano like Mozart. Yeah, there's all these like urban legends like I like like like, like, but wake up speaking Japanese flips like rowing a boat and wakes up. Yeah, and can speak perfect.

Right. Yeah. So that's. You want that. Yeah, but again, not right. I wouldn't mind it. If I'm going to get a traumatic injury, I'd like to be able to play the time. Well, I think we all agree that if if you're going to get a traumatic injury, you want to

benefit from it. True. Would that be episode one of your new series? Try to get a traumatic brain injury. So you can learn stuff. You already might. The piano one was cool because he just, but it was a blessing and a curse because it was so much,

he only could ever see piano keys. And he'd have to, if he drove a ballad music story, you have to get out of his car and go play piano. And then we have any documentation of this guy? Sounds like a hellish existence. Yeah, but. I can only see piano. Jay, guy dives into pool, learns piano.

If it's from the same Instagram, consciousness. Tarkovsky. You know how to play piano? No, I'm not musily talented. You got to start diving in more pools. How does that tie into this mat? I don't know. I got sidetracked again.

Derek Amada. Yeah, this is him. Holy shit. On October 2006, the subject became a musical savant. Whoa. Drove in a shallow swimming pool and it hit his head resulting in a major concussion, 35% hearing loss.

Although he had played the guitar prior to his injury, the level of his music ability suddenly progressed to the point where he was able to compose out for piano. He also, he has been diagnosed his experience of former synesthesia.

Synesthesia. Cinesia. Cinesia. Okay. So, yeah, we got really side-tracked, but that's him. Yeah. Okay. Let's get back to it. It was pretty impressive. Look out tired. Look out tired. Yeah. Are we still on lookout tired? Yeah, we're still on. Look out of it.

It's not even halfway. Look out tired got us. Way off. We'll speed this one up. So, yeah, the kids on the mat. Okay, look how tired, babies. All right, next one. Next slide, please.

Whoa. Okay, notable advocates of PEMF technology. Tony Robbins, Dr. Oz. Every athlete, the dolphin's O-Line. That's an illusionist, Donnie. What? Who? Oh, no, no.

No. You're thinking of those. But these are bullshit artists. Yeah. Me. Dr. Oz is on TV. TV doctor. Right.

These are bullshit art. Every day I come back from school. What's better than a doctor? When I was at French immersion, I come back at like 4 p.m. when I get off the bus, but my parents wouldn't be home yet, Dr. Oz would be on, and I just fucking wash Dr. Oz as a youth as like a fifth grade. French immersion is the school you went to, right? Yeah, that's why you can't spell cocoa.

Yeah, that one was more, I just was flustered. That was that. Does you know how to spell cocoa? You can spell it. Yeah, like spell it. I know there's a name at the end. You're not going to trick me again. Right.

So he never tricked me. CO-C-O-A. Yeah, there we go. Okay. Yeah, you don't make the same mistake twice. That's what my dad always said. We're back on dolphins. In regards to not having another kid.

Dolphin birth. All right. So this is, this is notable people. Hollywood. Hollywood? I usually want my science from Hollywood. Yeah, this one, I was trying to find more notable people, but I scrambled and this is the first thing I saw.

So not the bad. I believe, I don't know, though. It just says it. It just says Dr. Oz promotes health solutions. Is that dolphins again? Does that have anything to do with the math? Oh, my God, Donnie. Or dolphins.

That's the dolphins in a circle. Wow, that's just fate. That's fate. Holy shit. Is true a pregnant? Does Dr. Oz promote the mat or does he just promote health solutions? To be honest, I don't know. I just Googled notable people that promote this and that's what came up.

Okay. That was a little AI in that one as far as research. So we can skip this one because who cares of people that are famous use it. It should be if you want to use it. all that matters. That's right. Right. Okay.

There's the dolphins. And that was bought by two. Oh, this is just zooming in on. Did you do this? Yeah. Wow. This is a feature. This is in case you didn't believe you?

Yep. You told us you couldn't zoom on this. You have to pre-zoom. You have to do it before. All this pre. Okay. The healing power of P.E.M.F. Next slide.

Okay. So, oh, this is you all the level. So I kind of went through that. Is that Mr. Beast? So I'll get to this. Rubik Goda. Mr. Beast and Yoda. It's a.

Riddell? No. So, level one, this is the delta waves. The delta waves is the deep sleep. This is what I do before bed. Deep sleep, anxiety relief, restores restorative rest. Truly works. And, you know, I know you guys have been having a good time, but this works, okay?

If you don't believe me, try it. Level two, that's the theta. That's Earth frequency. This is grounding. This is to kind of reconnect with Earth. You can get the same feature by walking barefoot on grass. In the winter, that's hard to do, but I highly recommend doing that. Level three, Alpha, more mindful.

fullness, more, more, you wakeful relaxation. So you're kind of stimulated. It's like non-sleep, deep rest. You're stimulated, but you're not ready for bed. You're just relaxed, stress-free, easygoing. Level four. Now, this is where it gets interesting. This is beta.

This is energy, focus, mental clarity, okay? This combat sluggishness. This is good, you know, your cup of coffee wears off in the afternoon. You're a little sluggish. Your five, two-thirty feeling, whatever they call that. This is what the beta waves are for, okay? Never before bed. I thought you said you went beta before.

No, I might have misspoke. I go, Delth a bellishpoke. before bed. And why is Mr. Beast on because never before bed? It's like watching Mr. Beast. You do not watch Mr. Beast before bed. You don't do the room before bed. Why don't you watch Mr. Beast before bed? Why don't you watch Mr. Beast? Because you ever you ever be

Beasts before bed? I've never been. Don't be used to stimuli. It's too much stimuli. It's fucking way it's way too much. Colorful. You will not. Beast before bed when he had that new game show come out and I swear to God like I was up the longer than I've ever been up. I just kept watching, kept watching like Beast before bed, worst thing you can do. Why not Yoda

before bed? Yoda is more of He's calming. That was one of the other waves. Yeah, Yoda's fine. All right. Nothing nice. Rubik's Cube is just showing that it can help with brain. Could you beast before bed while doing the Delta?

No, because that'll cancel out. It's that, yeah. When in the routine do you jack off? No, that's not part of this, Mark. You don't? We're not too much joking off. What about, I mean, we're doing science. We're not fucking around here.

Yeah, a lot of guys beat off before they go to sleep. It's part of their routine. That's a whole other presentation. Yeah, you should be doing semen retention. What about? Should be? Should? Well, why should we be doing semen retention?

We're not going on this stage. On a testosterone. Testosterone. I don't, I don't know. I haven't done enough research into that either. Are you currently? How backed up are you? I don't do, no.

Are you doing semen retention? No, I don't retent. I don't. I don't. What was the last time you called your neighbor? It's been a little while. It's been a while. I've been traveling.

No, but I do get wet dreams frequently. Should I not have said? then is that how frequently once a month once a month? What? If I don't if I'm not jumping in your pants once a month not it's the fucking goat you're the bat if I'm not jerking on

I might need this mat It's nothing to do with the mat that's just creative That's a powerful mat Creative is good dreams Yeah so the drug probably could have You're coming in your pants once a month If I don't jerk off Really? Wow

How what is your semen retention Regiment? I just don't jerk off Ever No, I mean, occasionally, but maybe once every other week. So yeah, so just rarely. Yeah, I prefer the dreams are more fun. I think a dream is more fun. I would agree with that.

You're getting two beat-offs and one dream. Hands free, yeah, I don't know. Hands-free, yeah, I don't know. Hands-free nut. It's pretty good. Okay. So, I mean, seriously, though, if you want to have sex, where does the routine, you know?

Where's the mat? Like, do I have my sex and then I start this routine? Or I... Well, or I... Yeah. Probably because you're going to want to unwind from that. So. Yeah.

But doesn't sex make you sleepy? Sex to beta. I don't think it makes you sleepy. I think you gets you anged up. If I put a woman on this mat, would she want to have sex with me? It's nothing to do with you guys. Can you have sex on the mat?

It doesn't help your sex drive this mat? Let's, no, nothing to do. I'm trying to understand my nighttime routine, Donnie, is if my wife, it's the, it's, it's, talks a lot, Donnie. You feel like I have to buy two mats, too. One for the rap fuckers, one for the sex. There's no sex on the mat. Oh.

Don't, don't, this thing should remain unmolested. It's not supposed to be, it's not, you don't know. If you sell this to Mark, he can't have sex anymore? I'm done having sex. It's just over for me. Do it at your own pace. Do it whenever you want. Just don't do it around the mat.

It's not part of the routine. But it's under your bed. Yeah, don't do it on the mat, okay? But we come home from a nice dinner, nice night of dinner and a movie. Yeah. It's like 9.30 p.m. Yeah. I'm for bed.

Put your goggles. I got to put my goggles on. And my wife just starts like rubbing my back. And she's like, I was thinking maybe we could. And I'm like, not now, babe. I got a pre-goggle and beta wave Yeah well

Yeah sorry babe I save all my cum for my pants If you're having sex You're usually already in your bed I'm assuming so like at that point You should have already done your pre-sleep routine So do the routine for that's what I'm asking Do the routine

Get into bed Yeah and then if you have sex and you're too amped up Go back on the mat restart Got it good Got it got it got it Matt sex Matt Good solution All right okay

All right One in doubt Pull it out For the mat and sex I guess it works for both Look at that. Oh, that was the mat you were talking about, not sex. No, no, no, no.

Just whatever you do, don't be. So, pull the mat out. Pull the mat out. Okay, NASA's use of P-E-M-F. So now we're getting into NASA. Okay, next slide, it'll zoom in. Yep. So the 90s, they begin investigating the microactivity and bone density and astronauts, okay?

They're just curious. That says microgravity. Microgravity on bone. NASA begins investigating the effects of microgravity on bone density and astronauts, okay? This is the 90s. Is that mean they're curious? This is their, yep, AKA they're curious. Next slide.

2000s, there's their development of PEMF devices. You don't know what AKA means. Go to the cave real quick and see if people are watching. Okay, so we got something here. Lucky boys. They're all learning something. Hey, Deutsch. Okay, we should wrap this up.

No, no, no, no, no. This is maybe my favorite yak-in. I do not want to wrap this up. No lie. I'm very close to being sold. Okay, good. All right. So look at him. You're looking sharp. Yeah, he looks. Deutsch and I, I'm excited because, well, this is distracting, but the thing we do with the dart,

that just did a light bulb in my head that's, we could do so much more of this. Of almost killing yourself. More of that specifically. That genre. Okay. Yeah. That flavor. Okay.

Of danger. Okay, so in the 2000s. NASA's, they're developing devices. They're still just kind of in the middle of tailoring. and there's how do we fix this? What are we doing here? Okay, we got something.

Okay, we got something. Okay, also known as we got something here. What, AKA? AKA, other, you ask me of what it means? Why do you have AKA then? What does AKA mean? AKA is, my understanding is like, you summarize something. Oh, AKA, it means this.

No, but what is the word? What is the A. I have no idea. Tailored for space. Wait, wait, wait, hold, hold, hold, let them work on this. I have no idea. What could it possibly be? I got to do some deduction

We already got etc. We'll deduct one of the words that it can't be What can the first day not be? It can't be otherwise known as That's my first guess But a otherwise known as Yeah otherwise is O Also known as

Yeah Let's go Okay so that works Yeah A.k.a works Yeah In that sentence Also known as okay we got something

Yeah tailored for space missions Also known as okay we got something Yeah All right All right perfect Fuck yeah All right, next slide.

Where you go, Donnie? Okay, so 2002. Oh, there it is again. 2020s. You were just using A.K.A. and didn't know why. I thought it just used it for a summary. All right, so the current application of PEMF technology enhances astronauts' wellness. Okay, so if they're using it, well, why not you?

That's my question to the room. If they're using it, why aren't you? Okay, they're all using it. They're going to read everyone. They're going to double-s-havigate. Oh, oh. They're all using it. Oh, this is how it should have been read.

They're all using it. Everyone. So why not you? Who's? That's it. Is it again? What? There's inflection on the ever.

They're all using it. Everyone. So why not you? So we're supposed to say it all together? No, no. Is it they're all using it? Oh. What is it?

Are you? Do it. Is everyone all about? I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. They're all using it.

So why not you? Yeah. Okay, good. That's good. We'll work on that. It's not a call. Oh, you're telling yourself to say it.

to say it to everyone. No. Everyone. Everyone, this was our line. No, no, it's not a line. You say they're all using it and then we'll say so why not you? No, no. Let's try one more time.

They're all using it. So why not you? Perfect. I did not plan for that, but that's, that works too. It was one sentence. They're all using it. Everyone. So why not you?

Again, is everyone there all, is everyone referring to the people using it or is everyone referring to everyone you're talking to? No, no. Also, there's a period after it and then there's a period after everyone. Everyone's a one word. It's its own sentence. It's prompting a chance. No, it's not.

Everyone's not. Why not you? Why not you? Why not you? I like that. That's not how I wrote it in my head, but I like it better. Next one. It's supposed to just read like this.

It's just me reading it. It goes, they're all using it. Everyone. All right. Do it how you. Do it how you thought it's supposed to go. They're all using it, comma, everyone. That's what I'm saying.

Is everyone the, there all is also everyone. That's redundant. They're all using it And then everyone Everyone's using it But no so they're all using it You know you're talking to us They're all using it

It should have been That's for the astronauts Okay And then everyone is Everyone else And then So why not you You guys are getting hung up

On the stupid That is a prompt Everyone Why not you? Why not you? I guess Okay You guys are getting hung up

On the dumbest shit This is correct Yeah Kid Yeah Okay Can I be devil's advocate Sure

You're the devil anyway. You dumb bitch. Well, maybe we're not going to space, so maybe that's why we wouldn't. You dream bigger. Yeah. They have bigger dreams, Mark. I don't know what you're. You aren't doing 10x

mentality. You got to have. Are you familiar with 10X? Oh, yeah. Yeah. I would imagine. Trust me. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That's a good. Ten X in it. How has this been hidden for? I know. He's just been with us. We wasted years. For four years. I had a bad

You know Ty Lopez? He got He scammed me pretty good Ty Lopez He got me I'm here in my garage With my Ferrari Wait Ty Lopez scammed you

I bought his course I bought up Yeah I was in like 6 seventh grade It was young Okay But yeah he got me

He got me Enhanced wellness That's kind of ambiguous What did it do Were there How was that ambiguous Studies How did it

I'm sorry I thought you said I thought you were saying redundant again It's enhanced wellness I get the confusion Enhanced wellness I don't know

Are they Yeah what is Of the astronauts Are they measurable This was So this got to the part of the presentation Where I was scrambling to get it done So I didn't dive any deeper

Than the surface level of that So I think there's a next slide All right We're done with NASA You guys any more questions No no Oh no No questions about NASA

So that one's easy That one's just to show you A the big guys are using NASA was pretty clear Yeah Okay Next slide maybe it zooms in Let's make sure.

Not where I wanted to zoom in. Okay. Back up. Back up. No. Oh, this is the best. Okay. Enhancing life.

Okay. It's time to change your life. Unlocked your potential in the cosmic journey of health. Next slide. Now we got. We got the review. How's that sound?

How's that one sound? How does that sound, Mark? Sounds pretty far as you at Zoom one more time. Sounds pretty. It's time to change your life. Look. How's that sound Mark?

I need that as a gift. Be a good gift. How's that sound bark? Okay, daily use for stress relief. Just do it. Don't stress. It's going to save your fucking life. That's a stressful way to put that.

What's the command? Why the symbol? That was good question. I don't know what I was doing with that one. I think I was looking for a progressively growing energy or something. I don't know what I put into the chat bot for that one. but daily use daily use daily use for stress relief at the very minimum

5g bars if you're a guy if you're high stress like self it's like it's I don't yeah I don't that's really locked in the wrong symbol look I used to be stressed you know and and and uh service if I get wound up put it on the mat go on the mat that's a you're not stressed now

though no I didn't use the mat I didn't use the mat I didn't I have yeah next slide next slide well so you're using it throughout the day not just a night I try to use it in the morning and at night night. Okay, this is a quote. Would someone like to read this? You. Unknown. Read that. So it's not a quote. It's right there.

You don't know who it's from. How do you not? PEMF mats. Let me just read for you. All right. You're about to make it known. How do you not? PEMF mats are a transformative technology that harnesses the healing power of pulse of like metro electromagnetic fields to rejuvenate. the body and overall enhance the well-being. As you float through the cosmos of health, remember that

as you float through the cosmos of health, remember the integrating PMF therapy into your daily routine can add to an improvement, improvement, profound, energy, healing, and... Let's try that. Start that. Dude, I...

Start that one over. As you float through the cosmos of health... As you... Where does that start? In the middle? As you float through the cosmos of health, remember that integrating P.E. EMF therapy into your life into your daily routine can lead to

a profound improvements in energy, healing and vitality. That's unknown. TJ, can you copy and paste that quote? We've got to get to the bottom of this. Let's do some work. It's unknown. Who said this? Many famous quotes are unknown. What if it's Hitler?

That would be bad. That would be bad. Anyone but him would be better. What if Hitler said these words? Well, they'd be in German. That's a good point. to there, Mark. That can't be Hitler. That sounds.

That can't be Hitler. That's in perfect English. Okay. I think I have one more section and I will wrap this thing up. All right. I don't want it to ever end. No. You ever get that when you're reading it aloud?

Reading aloud is tough, but I would never do it. But one word further in his sentence looks like it's before. You ever had that? Dyslexia. Is that what that is? I don't know. Never. tested it.

Can we do a test? Maybe that would fucking maybe that's what I need. Oh, the sexist test? Yeah, I don't know. At this point, it can't. Maybe the Mac can heal that. Maybe so. Who quoted it?

We don't even know if it's a quote. We don't even know where, you might have just made it up. You just, no, no. Is it from the website? Where did you find it? From the box? How'd you find out of the box? You had AI.

I might have had AI write that. Right that. It's an unknown quote. I might have, I think the last thing I prompted was say, something like profound profound, profan, profan

give me a profound profound summation of oh fuck it no one wrote it all right so it is unknown it's not

it's not known as it gets oh yours mine to chef Donnie it's my quote put that on the Wikipedia okay oh what Wikipedia

Unknown quotes Unknown quotes Unknown yeah so hold on we're not done okay but that's your question we're getting a great question

I saw sneak peek of crystals there's a sneak peek of crystal my question is you said emfs are really bad but yes p ems are really good yep why why are why is one better than the other because these are control these are low frequency waves not all emmfs are bad okay you get naturally emps from the earth electromagnetic field okay you're going to get you're going to get ion negative ions from the earth naturally okay so they're good ones the hard the harsh ones are the high frequency waves that are coming from cell phone towers cell phones microwaves is a good radiation is a good Not all radiation, or not all waves are bad, yeah.

Okay. So this is a good dose. This is beta, beta, delta, and alpha are the waves that you are totally fine having. Combined with 432 hertz, push your right to sleep. Look, man, try it for a week, okay? And you come back to me and say... Well, you did that, and what are your results? You said...

I told you, I was dreaming. I'm dreaming like fucking hell. He's coming in his sleep, dude. You said a month, I thought. He's coming in his sleep. The coming is different. That's where... Oh.

I've been doing that since I was a boy. I don't know. Since you were a rat, you've been having a monthly wet dream since you were a boy? Since once I came of age, I don't know. That's why they call it that. All right, last slide. We'll end with this. Okay, crystals.

So crystals, to be honest, sir, crystals isn't matter. I didn't get all the way to them. So this is going to be another presentation at some point. But I wanted to let you know that crystals do have shit, but this is a little over my head. This part. On it. On it. More times.

I need more times on your time. Okay, that's good That will be in the due sign I asked my brothers My grandma's magic crystal Can you zoom in One click I think it should zoom Okay

One click yeah okay You remember Property brothers That's my group chat My brothers Alright do you guys remember The Crystal Gigi Had that when you asked it

A question It would spin one way For yes And one way for no I don't know Loosely remember that It worked though Right

No man that shit Dude it would spin I remember Yeah from shaking it You were drunk man So that's what my brother Why did you put this Donnie, that was a magic eight ball.

Was it a magic eight ball? Because there are crystals that work. But Donnie, that didn't help your case. Your brothers were like, dude. One of them said they looser remembered it. You put it in. And then they said you remembered it wrong. Well, he always says I'm drunk.

That doesn't matter, right? No, man, that shit didn't work. All right, well, fuck. The point is it existed. I wasn't just making that up. We had it when my grandma had a crystal that would move. Can we find something similar? Because I'm really curious.

What? Oh, the crystal? Yes. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, sorry. Do you think the brothers have another chat where they talk about you a little bit? No, this is the chat we used to talk about the other brother we don't like. Oh, shit. You're right, so that can't be another.

Yeah, and then the sister, she gets no chats. She's not in. Yeah. How many of you are there? There's five of us. Okay, all right. Yeah. That's hard.

I wonder what the hit rate was. One finish school. Oh, okay. One for five? One for five? Not bad. 20%? One still in, one for five.

Yeah, two for five. Oh, is it like three third. 333. Well, no, you can't say two for five. Because at one point, you were in school. Yeah. And so if we had said three for five there, we'd have been wrong. So it's like one and a half for five.

Sure, yeah. Pending. You lost me. One for five. That's 300 hitter. When you were in school. Oh, I see. Oh, yeah, you completed.

Yeah, but I could finish. Do it. Do it. Do it. We might have to have that part of the due science project. I could go finish. Some of the budget might have to go to tuition. I could go, but I think I'm still eligible.

What? Like a. For what? college yeah is it I mean you have no I don't have to reapply I'm already in like I go back to Madison

you could just show up you're not leaving here you don't do it virtually yeah I would do I could yeah do it virtually you're knocking out of our site I don't want to see that him going back to college to get my degree yeah

that'd be my mom would be so happy we'd throw the biggest party for you graduation party I don't think it'd be that hard I think I only have a couple arts in science like I was I was an English major science is your wheeled else You were an English major?

Yeah, I was. No, I'm good at reading. Mother fucking. No, you're not. You were in English? I'm good at reading, like, books. You just said you might have dislikes? I fly through books.

I read a fucking, I fly through books. Are you reading it correct? Do you retake them in? No, if there's a word I don't know, I just skip it or just pronounce it how I think it, what I think it means. That's what I read. How often do you do you? But I retain all the information in the book. I'm reading nonfiction.

I just read all the pretty horses. And it was a, don't laugh. Don't smirk. It's a cormac. It's Corrack, it's Corrmark. But that's pretty That sounds, I don't know any of the things I was gonna laugh until I heard it was Cormick

Corbock McCarthy. He just got canceled. He just died a year ago. He's the last great American author. He got canceled. He's the last great American author. I highly suggest that book. Okay, so what was that the end of it? Yeah, that's the end of it.

But yeah, yeah. So that's it. Wow. That's present. That was, well done. Incredible. I need more president. I might go by the mat right now.

I'm going to buy the mat right now. Yeah. I'm gonna buy Matt. You got the other sticking around here? Should all be... I gotta decide if I want to do the mat or have another kid and be bird than dolphins. We can do both.

What's holding a bet? I do both. You gotta get gerat fuckers on the mat. Yeah. Try the mat. The glasses in the mat. You'll be sleeping like a baby. Like a baby.

You'll be coming in your sleep. Okay, I don't want that. Babies don't come in their sleep. And also babies don't sleep. Wasn't that part of your presentation? Baby's sleep. Rat fuckers. Ratfuckers don't.

From whatever age to whatever age, they're doing their most... I used to babysit it. My baby came in. There we go. Okay. This was it. See, this is the same thing. So I think any crystal can be a pendulum.

No. And it's... So what is it doing? It's slowly moving. It's shaking. That person is just shaking. No, no, no. What?

Is that how you remember it? No, I actually know. Yeah, okay, it was similar to this. But you held... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. See? See? So... That was just a spin of the twine.

Wait, wait. Okay, okay. Okay. See? And see how it stops? Well, this lady's not doing a good one. I don't, look, I told you guys, not into Chris.

You're not fully in the cruise. You're not fully in. More times. That might be junk science. That one I'm not fully in. That should be junk science. Yeah, I agree. I'm a rational person.

Right. So Crystal's like, but I also, I believe that, hey, maybe some of it works. You know, I'm not going to count all of it out. Yeah. I'm open to anything. I'm like, I'd be a good Indian, Indian guy because they, they've there's the whole daughter feather how so go on that daughter feathers could actually work they're both very spiritual they're both holistic dot and feather so the wait this is pretty good

but that's just it says for entertainment purposes only they have to say that why do they have to say it same way you have to say fucking you know we i don't know if it's a warning so the lessons i'm taken from today are i need to get a mat asking change and how ice Don't beast before bed. That's, yep. Do you have any final hypotheses on what else this mat could do? I genuinely, I think just sleep is like the biggest improvement I've seen is from sleep. And I do need to sleep better.

And negative ions, negative ions are always good to have grounding yourself whenever you possibly can. You know, the amount of times that we're on our phones and screens and next electromagnetic fields, you should try to ground yourself as much as possible. So you're walking on grass with bare feet? Yeah, that works great. How often do you do that when weather permit? I don't live. I'll go to Wicker Park every now and then in the summer and try to get some grass in.

But if not, I have the mat. I already had a grounding mat before this one, so this is fine. My only question is everything you describe about getting ready to go sleep, putting the goggles on, laying on the mat. Could also be accomplished if I just lay down in a dark room on a bed. You go, absolutely. But this is going to help you. This is more if you have no trouble sleeping, fine. you know more more power to you thank you but if you struggle and if you want it deep restful sleep

yeah try it and use the 432 hertz if nothing else because you don't all have mats put the put the your earbuds in with just that sound and what see what happened i'll try that just the glass that one seems like something i try yeah i do use like a box fan for the noise i haven't got the glasses too yeah but the 432 hertz is i think better than the box thing i'll show i'll send you the glasses i have and i didn't want to say anything but i felt like of the whole room mark was doubting it the whole time well that's everything i do in this fucking agree yeah It's facts. It's me.

All right. So this was great. This is truly great. And we have homework. So next week I need all the dreams. Okay. In a Prezzi. In a Prezzi.

Is there, what are the odds one of these dreams will be wet? Probably not. Okay. No. All right. And if it is, I'll let you know. Dreams in Prezzi. So describing each dream and we can go in the whole Prezzi.

And then Donnie do science. So, two presentations. Yeah, the do science one will do after the Super Bowl. Okay, so I have two weeks for that one. You have like three weeks. Yeah, because I'm going on vacation after Super Bowl. Oh, so sick. Okay. But don't, but use the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I'm going to give you,

depending on how that presentation goes will be your grant. That's the biggest presentation in your life, though. Yeah, you can. Okay. You can do some serious. Serious science. Like, right now the, the budget for your grant is unlimited. Okay. But it's going to. So I should, should I, I shouldn't

even put a price on it then. I should just say You should do whatever you feel like doing Okay interesting Okay Okay I'll get started on that And I forget And then the dreams

Dreams dreams But you take them at home And you do something for me All right I will Just sleep I just want to hear I just want to see Stop taking Unisom

Okay Start sleeping on the Start doing 20 minutes on the mat And then Wear your glasses Go right to bed And don't touch your phone Also known as it's gonna be awesome

Mmhmm I will try it I absolutely will Can't hurt to try it. You know, can't hurt to... I want to get better sleep. Do you have to get butt-ass naked or is it just help? So I thought...

So I misspoke when I said that. You had to be butt-ass-naked for this one? That's when you're using red-light therapy. You have to be butt-ass-naked. This one doesn't have red lights in it. So you don't have to be butt-ass-naked. I think it's... You made your roommate take a picture of cock and balls.

Yeah, but... For no reason. He's seen that before. Your boys, yeah. Why has he seen it before? We went to college together, I don't know. Yeah. You see all your boys, cock and balls.

You might have to have your roommate in. No, that's a bad idea. He's a bad guy. You always say that. Like, before I met him, you preface, like, he's a really bad guy. Yeah. That's all you see. Yeah.

That's the only thing else. I love him to death, you know, yeah. But, you know. He's a bad guy. Yeah. Love him, though. What's his name Peter? Yeah.

Bad Peter. He's going to hate him. He's going to watch his show, man. What's up Peter? Peter. Stay away from me, Pete. Evil Peter. We just wanted like 20 minutes of your time, Peter.

What else was I had something else to fucking say, and I can't remember now. You got me very interested, more so in the quality of dreams I'll be getting, because that to me is what makes sleep quality. The big motivator. Yeah, well, that's when you're in REM sleep. I don't want to wake up tired. That's my issue. Okay, well, then you got to start doing, you do first light? You get up in the morning, and the first thing you do is go on like a 10 minute, 20 minute, walk.

It's negative 13 degrees out. Doesn't matter. That's what you should do. That's the best way to start. You feel wide awake. If you get out of a little 20 steps in before you touch your phone, go for a while. Eyes open. Don't touch coffee until, you know, an hour once you're awake.

I want this. This is common knowledge, but it's, you know, little things. Little things. I want my dream. I know you're a big coffee guy. Just hold off 45 minutes. Okay. I've been doing the no phone when I wake up.

That's great. Yeah. Go outside. Honestly, take the dog for a walk. We'll get the stare at the sun and fucking get ready to go. I love it Don't stare at the sun though Yeah you do get early morning sun

You don't just east directly Stare at the cornea I stare right up below At the what The cornea It's not the right word is it Ornie is in your eye Stare with the cornea

Stare I don't know So it's like if you're looking at the sun The balls right here I stare at the outer Outer ray You can stare at the sun That's a myth So optimize the libido

I just don't think you can stare at the sun Not at high noon no But in the morning yeah Well I can't speak on that When it's rising You can stare at it yeah rising sun you can stare at it's the best sun you can get um i keep keep forgetting what else i have but i think that's all for today don't you well done unbelievable and doing the most

is coming out so comes out uh no it comes out uh super bowl week super bowl week new day most wow so am i going back to college or that's a different thing that's different we'll get there i would like you to do science first but that yeah i could just get a science degree yes you can you could just do that i can go for school for science are you wearing velcro shoes yeah these are Yeah, these are my, these are the doing the most. Oh, okay. There's my work shoes. Can I borrow them?

For what? Your kid needs them? Yeah. Those are actually, I kind of like those shoes. Yeah, I play basketball on them if I ever, you know, if I ever get allowed. What? Just, just, just, you want to be on the team? Do you want to be on the team?

I mean, I contribute. Show up tonight? I can't, I'm out. Oh. out. All right. Thank you, Donnie. I can't wait for next week. The dreams. Dreams. All have to focus on his dreams. Every dream you have

every nightmare, too. Prezzy, though. Prezzi. I want every dream you had. Okay, I got it. All right. Pictures are going to be hard. Pictures are going to be hard for this. You can get that. Yeah, you're right. I can find a drawer or something. Okay. See you, Donnie. All right, thank you, Donnie.

Bye, Donnie. That was so incredible. I can find a drawer or something. What an What an episode. I think so. He's the best of all time. I went out to dinner with Chef Donnie Friday and a group of people. And I'm not, is he in today?

I saw him. Bryce Harper's using the mat. I saw that, but I don't want to, I'm tired of ratting on Chef Donnie, so I think if we just bring him in here, he'll incriminate himself. All right, that's perfect. Chef Donnie's about to walk in. He's going to start yapping. I didn't say a word.

You didn't say a word. But there's an event that happened that you want to be filled out? Let him leave out. Do we at? Why we know? Yeah. Hey, there he is. Donnie. What's up, brother? I brought you up because I wanted to say thank you.

Hey, Donnie. Hey. Thank you. For what? The, the glasses that I'm wearing every single night. Yep. And the recommendation to Beasts before bed. No.

Dude. I've been doing both, and it's been very entertaining. It's not what you're supposed to do. You clearly watched that you didn't watch the slide, right? Okay. You've been sleeping better? I have, but I've also started smoking weed again. That's not how you, that's the worst.

You get worse sleep from that. He needs to calm down after being. You don't dream, so good luck. So you don't smoke weed at all? No. Good. I've been doing mouth tape too. Mouth tape's good.

I think I'm becoming a snorer, which probably is like an underlying condition that I have, but I've become a snorer. You do goggles, Matt, mouth tape. Do you do mouth tape? Malt tape, like, optional. I don't, I'm not religious about it. What about dick tape? Never tried.

I've taped my dick to my stomach. Is he you guys? She Bryce Harper? Yeah, well, there you go. Yeah. We do that out. Bryce Harper's doing the sleep mat. So he's doing the sleep mat?

He had clothes on, though. Yeah, I said he should be probably naked. That guy has what? Well, that's because he's using, so he definitely should be naked. This dude, every time I see a picture of me, looks like he's been sentenced to a lifetime of sleep deprivation by like a warlock. Oh, my God. He always looks tired. Yeah, that ain't working.

Look how tired. Look how tall. He has red light. He's using red light on top, so that you do need to be naked for it. Like the red stuff that he has on the top. He's wasting the red light. Yeah, the red light's not doing shit. Maybe he's just naked from the-

He could be cropped, yeah. Yeah, we've seen that happen before yesterday. Are you worried about? Cock and balls with that? No, it's not like an extra. It's not like an x-ray. No, no, no. It's infrared.

Is it helping your sex drive and your sexual performance? Yeah, that seems fine. That's never a problem. Donnie, how is your weekend? It's a good weekend, normal standard What'd you do Friday? This, uh-oh. Friday I just got, I got dinner

and then had a couple of a couple of beers And And, uh, fucking that's it Had a couple more beers But anything after? Yeah Yeah, what do you, what are you saying? I feel like you guys know, what do you mean?

Yeah, whatever Where are we going with this? It's not a big deal. Say it how you think it happened. Yeah. How what happened? What are we talking about? You know what we're talking about.

No, I don't. You fucking dick. Donnie, just say. What do we talk? What do we reference? Donnie, if you just say, we can get out of here. There's multiple things that happen, so I don't know. I don't want to.

You want to see hear your version because last time we heard someone else's version that was the right. What did you even hear? I don't, because then you're going to get mad about it. It can be about multiple things I did. We've heard three things. So just say them all. We'll start. I don't know.

I don't know. Start with one. What? Sorry. The most obvious thing. The cosmos? Yeah. Mm-hmm.

There we go. So that wasn't it. Why is he all going? That's over there. The cosmos. That wasn't it. Go to the next one. Yeah, I drank like a high school kid.

I couldn't figure out what I wanted. I had a cosmic. It wasn't the cosmos. Keep going. So what is it? Nick, you're smiling. You're fucking said you want to talk about this. I didn't.

You weren't even there. This could have never happened. Who knows? Oh, so something. What do you mean? He wasn't there for what? Oh. Wait, is there something?

What wasn't he there for? I don't know. It could be. Two different things. So I don't want to fucking, I don't want to show my ass. I don't know. Let's try the first one. What thing's going to be?

The Chinese girl? It might be the Chinese girl. Okay. No. Okay, well, now it's the Chinese girl. It's the Cosmos and the Chinese girl. We'll get the other thing later. What about the Chinese girl?

Do you have a good doctor? Because I've fucking, I just, I have had high blood pressure for a while, and this show isn't fucking helping. I got to go figure it out. What if we did, what if we made, like, what if I gave you another mat? And you made a sandwich out of yourself. The meds, I thought it would help. It's not.

Wait, what? What? With blood pressure. With blood pressure. That's a different thing. Did the Chinese girl help with blood pressure? They might have a better. Ackypuncture.

Yeah. Western medicine. Eastern medicine. Shit. I got corrected by him. What happened with the Chinese girl? We're not talking about that because that's clearly something else. That's funny.

This is, now this is going to be. This is fucked. Okay, so you're referring to then the bartender. Yeah. Oh, no. Honest mistake. Oh, no. Which I still don't know.

This could be a nick. I don't even know if it's, it's, it's, I'm pretty sure was, my initial thought was correct. What was the honest mistake? They're claiming that it was a guy. I don't think it was. You said, ma'am? I don't think I addressed I don't know if I addressed

Did you did you hit on them? No, I wouldn't do that Did you say it was exactly your type of chick? That's because she had a studded belt It's better and better What? It was a punk rock looking style That I

You're not punk rock That's a guy I like a chick that's a little punk rock So you had a server It was a punk rock chick She was bartending But it was a man But it was a man

I see this is where I disagree. I don't think it was a dude. I refuse to believe it was a guy. Who else is there? Nobody can back it up. Nick wasn't even there. Let's zoom in Austin. No, it's not, because I know what Austin's going to say.

It was a guy. He's going to say it was a guy. And now you're going to clip this to make it look like I said it was a guy. I did not. It was a woman. Donnie, I didn't say anything. Oh, bullshit. There's no way.

Rewatch. I'm not going to rewatch because I don't want to hear what you said. Donnie, he didn't say anything. So how else could it have come up? You brought it up. You brought it up. Fuck you guys. Wait, wait.

Oh, we got about the Chinese chick. No, no, no. What's the Chinese chick? That's something completely different. I don't even know if she was Chinese. This is a chick. Problem. Wait, so we have a man, two women.

A man woman and a Chinese not Chinese. A Chinese chick that's not Chinese and a woman that's a man. So the punk rock bartender was serving you Cosmos? Austin has confirmed. I said, was Donnie attracted to a man bartender who said, yes, his back. I didn't say attracted. I said, that's my type. That's like the highest form of the traction.

And he goes, oh my God, that's exactly my type of girl. The person turned around. It was a dude. Wait, so you said it when you couldn't see the face. Yeah, you couldn't see the face. When the face turned around, you didn't go immediately, dude? That happens to PFT sometimes. We've been in a steak restaurant before, and a waitress has been like, can I take your plate, ma'am?

It was brutal. Yeah, well, I don't know. I don't know how it. I don't know how it shook out after that. I didn't know anything about the Cosmos or the Chinese. I was overserved, dude. I couldn't decide. Too many Cosmo.

How many Cosmo? Too many Chinese chicks. But the punk rock, was this in the same bar? The punk rock man was serving you Cosmos? The Punk Rock man would come take your order and you'd be like, can I get a Cosmo? No, I never ended up ordering. I never spoke to that person. Okay.

I never spoke to them. So I don't know. You just from across the bar recognized that was your type of person. It was just something. Someone with a good-looking blonde hair and fucking studded belt. Yeah, I don't know. How was the ass? That wasn't looking at the ass.

Just the belt? The belt and the hair. Masculine ass. How were the biceps? Again, if it was a man, it was very frail man, so I don't know. A beautiful. A beautiful. A boutique man.

Look. How tall? How Chinese? I don't know, actually. Who is Chinese? 60-40? 60-40 Chinese. 60-40 Chinese.

60-40 Chinese. How do you get to that? Lucky guys? That's a decent amount of Chinese What's the 40? What? Something else. 60% Chinese.

You don't need to be so angry, man. Yeah. Well, you... Who is the Chinese chick, though, for real? No, no, we're not doing this. Why? This is, this, we're not doing this. Was this later in the night?

This was it the same, this was in the same night. Guys, what do we guys, come on. Was it because of the cosmos? Yeah, yeah, it was. When did you start sipping Cosmos? I had one. I don't even know if I got it. It was a Cosmos.

actually. It was a pinkish drink. I got what she was drinking to make it easy. Who was drinking? The Chinese girl? Dude, no. Yes, but no. I'm not. She come up to you or did you go up to her? I went up to her reluctantly. What? Oh. Oh, and you said I'll have what she's having and it was just a pink lady drink.

Yeah. Served by a petite man bartender. Yeah, I guess. If you want to put it that way. If you want to spin it that way, sure. Okay. Did she, was she? Yeah, it was good. It was nice. You got her number? Yeah, I did.

Good. How are you? Nice. Did you find out if she's Chinese? Did you text her? I didn't ask. I know, but it'd be nice to know 23 and me. Why?

We should probably get to the bottom of that. I know. I'm probably. It's not going to be good. Before we dated. There's more Chinese girls than anything in the planet. It was like a billion. Is there?

Good. One and a billion. You can be there. We like hanging out with you, man. I really enjoy you. Well, thanks. I enjoy it too. Yeah?

Not every time. Like today, I'm not having to be fun. I'm not having fun. Why? What could we do to make your time a little bit better on the show? How's the dream presentation going? I haven't started.

I and I fucked up. Have you been writing them down? Yeah, but that's how you wanted to do it. Yeah, but. Well, there was a hiccup. I don't know if I should even tell you about it. if I should just pretend like I'd never hooked up, hicked up. Yeah.

If I never messed it up, there was a hiccough, slight hiccup. What was it? So I wanted to do it like a doctor, so I had a recording, like a, what do you call that, just a recorder? So I would talk to it, like, give it, so I don't have to write notes in the middle of the bed. But the internal memory was full, and there was no SD card in it, so none of my thoughts were, they got recorded. Speaking to nothing. So we got to restart.

I remember that, so. Yeah, save for the presentation. I'll save for the presentation. Okay. There's enough in the present. Well, I haven't started it, but I think that I have enough to put together. Okay, perfect. There's enough in the present.

I think I have enough to put together. Do you need an SD card? Well, you get an extra day. We're going to do Thursday instead. Okay, that helps. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I think I've invented a new way of the dream, but I will save them. Oh, wow.

I'm so excited. Holy shit. That's a big moment in human history. You've invented a new way to dream. This would be like a top 10 discovery lifetime. We'll see. We have Donnie's presentation. And that's really all that matters.

That's why we're here. Yeah. That's why we're all here. That's why we still work here. He said he needs to one. What? What? Let's give him all the time he knew.

No, that's a good thing. He's doing it now? It's not done anything. You're right, you're right. So I walked in the kitchen because we shot a What's for lunch today. And he was working on it. It looked exactly like the other one. because it just was.

He had not started the... Ah. But he has all his dreams written down by hand. Oh, good. So he's just... I think he's transferring data. Got it. So the second hour's all, Donnie.

He's working hard. Just like that, it tears me up for some reason. Blurry-ass Donnie. Tares me up right now. Look how blurry. How does having cancer ruin your dreams? Wait. What do you see?

Hold on. Zoom in on his phone. Uh-oh. Wait. Oh, dang it. What was it? Is that Stalin? That was Stalin. He's looking up.

Is that Joseph Stalin? I think that was Stalin. What did you think you saw on the phone? I think it was a picture of me on his phone. Great preview. Good eye. For you. I think that was a picture.

Because I was doing like a, I did like a photo shoot and I sold, we sold these t-shirts back in the day with homage. And I did a photo shoot where I was like, wearing short shorts and spread my legs and I had a ball like over my crotch. And that was it? That was black and white and it looked. Oh, I can't wait for the payoff here. It's going to be a bull's out of it.

I think it was, I think he was looking at that picture. Oh, that means you might be dreaming about you. It's very possible. That could be very possible. Mark. Mark. Do you guys talk off that? Oh, yeah, that's it.

That's it. Nice catch. Sure. What if that has nothing to do with the presentation? I actually now am rooting for that. where we have to like we finish the presentation we're like hey wait a second why did you have that picture up on your phone yeah this is the picture i just found it hang on oh man brandon hey yeah that's it that's it's a hundred percent it's a hundred percent it somebody

go up to chef donnie and tap your watch he said 115 the latest do we get them pre-riiled up yeah i think we need to get him a little brandon give him a call let's put some game pressure i mean if you want he was he was he was he wanted up yeah yeah yeah get in there mark I'll go. TJ, do we have audio in there? For the job. If you want to do. Apologize.

You don't have to apologize. That's a big accident. Just move on to the next thing. Yeah, that's actually like a mean thing to be like, you don't know how to bike? Yeah. It's like riding a bike. Is that? Why is he lowering his...

Does that hat indicate what his brain's doing at the moment? Like, you turn it down when it's really... I don't know. I don't know he's... Oh, boy. It's just mean that he made us wait so long. Oh, he's all anyone wants. Oh, in fairness, we should have told him a couple days in advance.

Like two weeks? Oh. Oh, yeah, all right. He's got him. He's the first. Oh, yeah. Wormed him up. Yep.

I've never met anybody with a shorter fuse. Oh, he's got standing up. Oh. Yeah, like Max loves how short his fuse is. Yes, that says. That speaks volumes. This guy's a real fucking hothead. Facts.

Before I could even ask him, how long he's going to take, he said, like, cancer and dreams don't go together. Don't worry. But listen, of all the things to love about Donnie, I think the thing I love the most is how much he hates Mark Titus. Yeah. Hates him. It's so funny. There he is. Hey.

Amen. Just like I said. Just like you said. What the fuck? Oh, we're sponsored by it. Noble. We can do an ad. We can do an ad re.

What are you talking about? Why you put those on? We don't even have to look at it. Oh. Not bad at all. I think they want you to wear them, not. Don't be so mad. You know these aren't going to fit.

You can just put them on over those shoes you're wearing. Yeah, you'll leave your... Put them up for top. They don't fit. All right. Do we really need those? You want me to put those on? No, you're okay.

All right. You're okay. We're just having fun with the boys. I can tell. It's fun. It's always. Are you ready for this? I'm excited.

It's a new way to dream. Yeah, well, like ready is a loose term. Do you need more time? No. No, no. So you're ready. So what makes ready a loose term?

Am I as ready as I could be? No. You know, but how much more ready could I get? Don't know It's a good point No idea How much more ready could you get It'd be like a

No it's now or never Are you going to be So obviously this one was a little rushed Yep Do you know that do science is happening The week after the Super Bowl Yes Will you be ready for that

So do science is happening Not next week but the week after The Tuesday after the Super Bowl Perfect Yeah That's true science day That's ideal Okay have you been

You said that about this one. Right. Every time I give you a date, you go, that's ideal. Yeah, but this one, I had a couple of mishaps with this one. Okay. What happened? Well, the recording. The recording and, like, yeah, dreams turned out to be, you know, fuck, you could talk forever about it.

Yeah. Can I tell you, by the way, before? Thank you again. I swear to God, if you say about Mr. Beast, I get it, you're having fun with it. But I see it on my timeline and it gets me pissed off. I'm beasting before bed every. Well, I tag you every time. Yeah, that's why I see it.

Just do that shit on your own side. Don't like it's like, oh no, I'm letting you know the minute I start beasting. Last night, Wisconsin, our, our alma mater, which every bad game against Minnesota. We won. Fuck. It was a 50-50 guess, man. We came back from 20. We won.

And what I say right after I said, what a, what a comeback. Now I'm going to reward myself with some beast. You do it. It's your life, man. It's your life. needed it, now we beast before bed. Yeah, man, it's like, I don't know, you could do that.

Do that, it's like, you know, the cool parents that let you drink in their basement, you don't talk about it, just do it without talking about it. Okay, but fair. The glasses, though, I actually have noticed help because I've stopped taking Unisom and I'm falling asleep. Okay, so we're on the right track. But I'm at, you'd sleep way better if you just cut the beast shit out.

And then... Yeah, that's me beasting. It's very entertaining. He does a good job. He knows what he's doing. Is that him on a money? I'm a money? Yeah.

Yeah, don't do it. Oh, man. Yeah, that's him on $5 million cash. But like, how does it affect you? When he tags you in the Beast, do you have to start watching Beast? He's not five million? No, I just get angry that he's doing it because he knows he shouldn't be. Yeah, I know I shouldn't be, but it's so good.

You want what's best for him. Oh, I'm just trying to help. Yeah, I'm trying to help everyone sleep in this room. Is there a YouTube content creator that you should watch before bed? I don't think so. I honestly just put the hurts, put the sound. on and yeah you know i'm having vivid dreams though really yeah well so something's working yeah so it might be the beast we'll see what category they fall under and the thing they don't tell you

about beast is once you watch one you got to keep watching that's what he does yeah yeah it's what and i love it i i do think of you every time i beast before bed because there's right before the show starts there's a warning it's like strobe lights if you like you could have uh epileptic yeah epileptic So it's like, yeah. Imagine what that's doing. If they have to warn you before you watch something, how bad it is. That's what I like. It's dangerous.

Get your eyes nice and tired. Yeah, so much. My brain gets real tired. So should you, do you beast in the morning to get an extra, like a boost? No, a beast, it's like a Sunday afternoon. Okay. It's beast Sunday afternoon only. The weekends.

Like when, when's a weekend activity? Well, it's football. Well, not now. He's right. True. Okay. He's right. All right. Are we ready? Yep.

Yeah. Ready as I'll ever be. And is this a PowerPoint or a Prezzi? Of course. It's a Prezzi. Oh. Spent all that money, dude, I'm going to use it. Yeah. We're going to get everything out of Prezzi.

Yeah. For sure. Great. T.J. Are you still, am I still signed in in there? Yes, sir. Oh, yeah. Shit. No, no, you're good. You saved my password?

You've logged in. All, but that's my. my password for everything. Right, but you logged in. Also, TJ wouldn't have... Yeah, but how would you save it? It doesn't magically save. You have to click save.

I don't know. I feel a little... Whatever. Violated. I won't use it, I promise. He also wouldn't have known that was your password for everything unless you said that was your password for everything.

You also didn't tell me your password you logged up. I'm trying to listen to him. Come on, Mark. Try putting them on. You're good. You just put them on. You just put them on. Yeah, but I don't know, man.

You don't need to. Yeah. You just don't know. Yeah, there's really no way to know. All right, let's get it then. Let's fucking get it. Like, are you excited or reluctant? Is this Chinese?

I don't know. The Chinese one in his touch. Okay. All right. You read this? Yeah, Exploring Dreams and Nightmares, and also the Chinese perspective on dreams. Open with a quote. If you've seen Willie Wonka, he sings a song and it's close to...

What was it? Yeah. Is that a movie? What was it close? Yeah, you've seen the original you were around for that shit. It's true. Dream or dream of pure imagination. Okay.

Come with me and we'll see the world is pure imagination. That image is the cornea of an eye. Whoa. Wow. I believe. And we're about to dive into that. What are the micro-emission? Whoa.

Wow. This one I thought I deleted. We'll roll. You could do anything. Yeah. In China, this one I didn't think would actually mean it. But yeah, so in China dreams were this is more of a background on dreams. Chinese fucking

they were big on dreams. Wait, wait, Johnny. Weren't dreams probably prevalent in every ancient civilization and every yeah, but I'm focused on the Chinese right now. Chinese invented dreams. And you could do anythings? Again, this slide wasn't supposed to be in, so... Why did you want to delete the slide? Because I didn't

have the, like, we weren't, whatever. You wanted to do more. What did, what did you search for that picture? Chinese dreams actually. That one was pretty straightforward there. So yeah Pretty historically significant Chinese Okay, so next slide

We'll kind of breeze through the Do the Chinese dream the same Now this is what's... Whoa! Why did this become just Chinese? Well, this is the beginning of it. We're doing a Chinese presentation. This is the beginning of it.

Dream second Chinese first. Next slide. Do the Chinese tree the same. Oh! She's not here, but he's our resident. So I, you know. Next slide, it depends. It totally depends.

It totally depends. What does it depend on? In theory, yes. They dream the same. But they're much like the Native Americans where they hold a higher value on dreams in society.

Okay. Yes and no. And they dream in Chinese, I presume. Or, man. They dream in Chinese? That's a fact. Do the Chinese dream in Chinese? You don't think they dream in English?

Brother, I don't think so. They're there's there it's not probably not it depends if they speak both languages potentially but it depends Um but we're gonna go for this the all tense of purposes we'll say yes the Chinese do dream the same as us So that was our conclusion so that was a big fine so that so now we've moved past the check we can now next slide So we wait wait wait wait wait that's so we going into this I think a lot of us were like Chinese dreams what's up with that yeah And now we're good. We solved it in the first slide. Yeah.

That was the, yeah. But solving it was also, it depends. Right. So it's inconclusive. Right. So like, it depends on if they know English. Age old question, do Chinese dream the sense? When did China get introduced to this at all?

China was on my brain. So it's what we know. Oh, the Chinese girl. Do you? Nope. Oh. Not that. Not that.

You were dreaming about the. Danny. Yeah. Connecting the dots here. Don't connect dots. That's not for you to do. You, but if someone were to connect the dots, bed, Chinese. You, you, you, you, you, you met a Chinese girl.

Uh-huh. Turns out she's not Chinese, but it doesn't matter. What is she? Don't want to ask, I'm afraid to ask. But how do you know she's not Chinese? Tried asking chat GBT, didn't, didn't want to. Wait, did you send a picture of her to chat GBCs? Chat, GBC's.

It says it can't do that, and then I concluded by it said, not Chinese? It said, we can't tell you, but, and I looked at other, I, cross-reference and I go, it's whatever, dude. What did you cross-reference? Images of all Asians. So what were your findings? I don't, this, it's going to... What was she closest to? This is not what this presentation's about.

You made it about China. I know, but now we're moving, can we move back to the dreams? Yeah. Okay. That's interesting too. This is becoming a nightmare and I don't want that. Okay. Okay. Depends. Next slide. Every slide is so fun. Okay. Click, click, click in again.

Moving on. Thank God. Moving on. Now that we understand the Chinese, we can understand our... Wait, we do we understand? I don't think we understand the Chinese yet. I do. Now that we understand... Switch... The tours?

The tours? Again, Chinese... Chinese to others? First, much money is this thing cost? You think they'd have the fucking squiggly lines under things. They don't. You're right. No...

But wait, we... Do we understand? For all... For the purpose of this, we understand. Okay, then it depends. It's like... We figured out the Chinese and one... slide? Yeah. And what were we supposed to switch the pictures out from the Chinese to the other?

See how those guys are Chinese? Yeah. They're not going to be Chinese moving forward. Oh. Oh. Go ahead. This is the last Chinese we'll see. So China, we're closing the book on China. For now. Oh, teaser. Circleback action. Oh, no. For this president, there's no more Chinese. No more Chinese. I just met in general. So if you're Chinese, you can just turn off this presentation. Well, they might still be interested. Yeah. We don't want to lose a billion people. That's a big audience. I should have said if you are solely interested in Chinese dreaming, you can turn this off. Well, you already know everything you need to know. It depends.

They also sleep on their bed. They sleep on like a bed like this. This might, that might affect dreams. A bed like what? Yeah, they basically sleep on the floor, which probably better for you, but that's another project. Okay. See that project. Next slide.

Okay. Did you, did you manipulate the photo? No. That's just straight up. I stretched it out. You stretched it out? To fit the screen, I just copy-paste stretch. Okay. But moving on.

Oh, he looks Chinese. Stretched it out. I didn't know that. Martin Luther Emperor. You said you're done with Chinese. You trust me, I didn't see it on the big screen. You've Chinified MLK? No, dude.

I think that's... I wish Shay was here so he could tell us how to say his middle name. That's recency bias. That's got to be recency bias. recently pious because you just saw a Chinese person so now you're thinking everyone looks Chinese

so no I didn't you did not make him look more Chinese no I didn't I swear but you agree he does look more Chinese probably that's pretty sure

it's illegal you can't historical figures you can't do shit to that is yeah they killed him well the CIA killed him

right they did something to him yeah I mean that's a rabbit hole but I might have mentioned that I don't think I talked about the CIA too much okay so

people might see this picture and go that's a famous dreamer I have a dream okay let's see the next slide but was it really a dream are you talking specifically about was it a dream actually was that and let's find out no so I'm going to define a dream

so while an innovator and while a great message not a technical dream in the sense that we are defining in this presentation what dream are you speaking you have to be asleep he wasn't sleeping I don't know. What are you talking about? Because I looked it up.

I asked. What was his dream? Dream for, you know, it's an amazing dream. No, what's specific, like, when we're, for a dream that you're referencing of his, what are you talking about? His, his, his, his, his dream. Of civil rights. Yep. And the end, end all wars.

And he was an innovator. But not a dreamer. He was a literal. Not in my sense, okay? So I don't want to take anything away from his dream. Was he a dead dreamer? So when he was given the speech, he was a one? wake he just came up the ideas is he used his dream as a metaphor and i don't you don't believe i don't

believe in metaphors for this definition of dreams so you're what we're well actuallying martin luther king's i have a dream speech i don't know what that means as long as it's not bad then yet it should be i have a thought right yeah speech should be i have a thought perfect yes but you know i have an idea i have an idea it's an aspiration that's great i have an what would you guys think about this yes but hear me out so we're not taking this by you yeah we're not taking it's a anything away from the dream wouldn't it be cool yes okay so now we've defined dream dream by my definition and this is my definition got to be asleep but what's the definition that's not the definition of dream what's your definition what's your definition of dream start now

sleep thoughts during sleep that you don't know what they're going to be okay what if pretty good what if he was asleep he wasn't I looked it up he was not I googled was his dream real and most of everything I found, no, it wasn't. It was a thought. He wasn't asleep. All right, that's, we're spending too much time on this. I'm just, the definition of a dream should be a quick slide that you get through. I apologize for them, Donnie.

Okay, next slide, please. Are we done with Chinese Martin Luther King? Oh. Oh, there is CIA. CIA anti-dream. Wait a minute. If it wasn't a dream. Yeah, but they're anti-dream of MK Ultra.

They're doing another shit. So this is more anti-dream. And they also made him do bad things. And I, you know, I don't. What? Oh, my God. They try to disparage him. CIA bad.

But he's not a... Again. All right. That might have gone counter to what I just said, but it doesn't matter. We're moving on. All right. Moving on. Okay.

See you, Chinese Martin Luther King. Okay. Another dreamer. Was he dreaming? Next slide. No, but we're getting closer. Okay. Steve Jobs will come back into this.

Why are we getting closer? How are we getting closer? Because he invented it, I guess, all this stuff. say it now. He would do a, and I'm going to mispronounce the word, so it's hypnism something. Hypnotherapy? No.

It's like he invented his own stage of wakefulness that he was half asleep, half awake, and that's when he got all his ideas. Who did that? Steve Jobs. Ah. Another cancer. Yep. But there's a relatability thing for you. You said you have to be fully asleep.

Right. So I said, that's why I said no. Oh, we're going to closer. Okay. He was halfway. He was hippo what? Yeah, what is it? Something hip-hepo something. Hypocratic oath?

H-Y-N-G was all. Oh, we're doing Chinese again. I don't know if that it is, but sure. All right, we'll go to the next slide. I told you, this one it was, you know, I don't have everything in here. Okay, now that we've defined dreams, we can,

okay, this is my research port. So now we're, that was all backstory, I guess. Backfill. All right, so what we've learned so far just to sum it up, Martin Luther King, not a dreamer, Steve Jobs, half-trimper. No, yep. Chinese, we don't know. It depends.

Chinese depends. That's good, we're good. It's good to know. I've never been more confused about dreams. Now that we define, but you kind of have just defined what's not a dream. So the three categories of dream are awake, half and Chinese? No, no, no, those are... Do it depends.

I don't know. No, no, these are my categories of dreams now that I was really. researching. Okay. Okay. I've identified Floyd. Again, guys, you guys made me do this with an hour to spare. Now, that's not trees. That's not true. Our spare. I told you a week ago. Okay, well, that's on, yeah. Agree to disagree. Okay, now that we've defined dreams, you can discuss the types of dreams. My research. My research. Okay. It's on my research. I've identified three categories of dreams. Three categories or three types. Okay. The classic, the First of you'll know, dreamer.

Standard. Standard nighttime dream. It's a beautiful thing. What's this movie? That's about a horse. It's, what's his name? Kent something, fucking Herbert. Kurt Russell?

Yeah, Kurt Russell. Your first type of dream is dreamer. That's like the dream of just a nice time. Basic standard. Dreamer, yeah. Okay. You wake up, you're, well, holy shit, that was not. And is that movie about a dreamer?

I haven't seen it. Is the horse name dreamer? I think it's a horse name dreamer. The horse is a horse. name dreamer? To be honest, I haven't seen it. Okay. First type of dream. That would just look like a lovely encompassing way to show a dream. Got it. Second type of dream.

You guys should know this one. Nightmare. Oh! There it is! We saw you. We were doing a little weekend. Oh, you spooked. We were looking at you and we spooked? You spooked, yeah. That's what you mean? Yes, it is. You mean Snoop. No, what do you call spy? A spook.

Snoop. Yes, you do. No, it don't. No. You can't, is that a bad word? All right, let's move on. A new. We've, we've left the Chinese portion of it.

Right. We're fine. A ghost. Yeah. A spy. Oh! Yeah. Sorry, Donnie.

Okay. My apologies. Sorry, Dad. My apologies. We spooked you. So I was right. God damn, I know a lot about the CIA. Yeah, you do.

Oh, shit. Okay. What was the last one? Not good. All right, well, cut it there. I meant it in the right way. It's live, Tommy. Cut it.

Cut it there. All right, so, yeah, we were looking at you, and we saw you had a phone out with Titus' picture. We're like, how's this going to work? Can't spy, man. That's right. I didn't know. I wasn't comfortable with it. Whose idea was it?

It was Titus. It was my idea. I said to them, let's, why don't we look at him and see if he's got a picture of me? And I'll be goddamned. You did. Why did you choose that picture? because I wanted the picture of a nightmare and that's it

yeah it was either just gonna be his face and I was like how can we make it even scarier and then I put devil horns on it that looks good that's a good one yeah you did a good job there's a lot of weird pictures of you on Google you know that yeah I do just added another okay um a nightmare

I would love for that to show up now yeah can you get that in the rotation above my understanding of it but TJ might Okay, so we have dreams and nightmares Pretty standard The third category which This might be my own These are what most of my dreams fell under

So next slide So dreamy nightmare is what I call this And you might ask Is that Franz Ferdin? That's Joseph Stalin Joseph Stalin Oh, we knew you were looking up Joseph Stalin Yeah

But it had a hair Yeah Dan why do we both I don't know I don't know Same category I think that Why would we both think that?

Can we see France for a man real quick? Joseph Stalin was a looker. Yeah, it's a hot guy. Now, he's a dream and nightmare? Dreamy nightmare. Hey, we were way off. Why did we think that? Damn.

Oh, wait, no, who's the guy who killed him? Oh, that was a... Gavrillo Princep. Search him. It was a younger, narrow, or a guy. Yeah. Still not. No, not even close.

That's really weird. That guy started World War I? Yeah Yeah Yeah Kind of impressive Yeah Where were we

Okay so you have dreams You have nightmares and you have something in between Wait wait Stalin's in between Me and the Kurt Russell movie Yes Yeah You're worst in Stalin

Yeah well young Stalin This is purely off looks Because he's a hot guy in that picture But he was a fucking nightmare Okay Bad guy It's a literal dreamy nightmare. So the majority

of your dreams have been under this category? Yeah, I'm not really sure why or what's going on. So what can you explain that? Well, next slide. Oh, and just in case that one didn't show up bright enough I wanted to do it. So we have a couple of times. A couple of versions. Okay, next slide.

Okay, so my dreams. These are all dreamy nightmares. And this is, we can kind of breeze through this one. Weird points. Read that. I thought dreams were just what was in my brain. before bed but the last one threw me off no conclusion need more time yeah maybe so

wait whoa whoa okay go through them let's hear about right okay so these are all dreaming nightmares because they're like you know on paper it was like these are we all great things I like to do and but someone was wrong every time

ski dream I dream that I actually slept through the entire day didn't get to ski you dreamt that you slept yeah so it's weird it's a weird one I do that's yeah yeah I'm class all the time. That's cool. You're still going to school. Yeah, I don't know why.

Well, it's a dream. Cooking dreams, same thing. You know, I'm fucking, you know, these are really important. You over asleep. You're just standard dreams. No, what happens on the cooking dream? Spoke the wrong. It was in French and I spoke the way. I used the wrong word and everyone laughed.

It's like a kind of a classic thing. What was the word? Who? I said conach instead of kanauch. Yeah. What does the wrong word mean? One means duck. One means asshole.

I was trying to call that. Oh, no. Who laughed? Who, when you say everyone? Like the rest of the cooks in the room. All the cooks in the room. But again, these dreams, talking about dreams is like, you know, who cares? It doesn't matter.

The last one was interesting. Last one, so I thought these were just what I was thinking about before. I kind of want to know in all of them. What was the concert dream? Concord dream, so it should have been really cool. It was like I found my way into a private Billy String show. It was like 10 people. Tank there?

To be honest, no, he wasn't. He's going to be pissed about that. Yeah, yeah. Well, you can't control it. But it was an endless loop of not being able to get into the room. So it was like a different room. They'd open, door would open, and it would be an empty concert hall. So I never actually saw the show.

But I had the idea of going to it. So Hank might have been there. Might have been at the actual concert. You might have been to the right one. Yeah. What's the other one? You get sleep paralysis? Yeah.

So interestingly enough, I don't get it in the standard. I've only had sleep paralysis. This is three times. And it's only ever been in this apartment that I'm currently living in. And I know the stand, so I don't know if I even call it sleep paralysis because it's the same thing every time, but it's not a demon standing above my bed. Believe it or not, I, it's my roommate's trying to get into my room every time. That happens to me. And I can't get out of my bed.

I go, Peter, what are you doing? Get out of here. What are you doing? What are you doing? I have it with my kids are getting into my room. Okay, so you're calm. I can't, I can't wake up. It's odd, isn't it? Yeah, it's the worst feeling. It's so I, it's a form of.

Then you wake up and you're like, holy fuck. Right. So it's got to be a form of sleep paralysis because it's, but it's only ever been with my roommate. it's kind of it's odd but he's feeling the door's opening and you're just staying in your brain is like trying to wake up but it cannot wake up it's very frustrating why would rot and heater be trying to get to your room

good no who knows I have a theory that he sleeps in my bed when I'm not there but I don't know what's that theory based on wouldn't put it past him I don't know so why is sleep paralysis categorically in the dreamy nightmare that just happened

I just had to include it that doesn't you're right that doesn't fit and does anyone else in the room have that Dan. It's happened to be before and it was like twice. It's so scary. It's one of the scariest experiences I've ever had. Red light guys. Red light guys, yeah.

I had it before that. Yeah, same. Well, no, not same, but. Actually, also not same. I had it when I started wearing them. No, you didn't. Don't fuck. Maybe it was a beast then.

Just blame it on the beast. Blame it on the beast. Blame it on the beast. We have to do some science on that. Okay, and then the weird boyish dream is Che. Che. So, Chee was in my dream. And this one makes no sense.

The other ones I thought this. was just what I was thinking about in my day, just carried on into night, wasn't ever thinking about Che. And we were pool hopping as teenagers together. So what dream of Che? So it doesn't make any sense,

and I really don't know. I was hesitant to even put that on there, but what kind of scientist would I be to lie? Yeah, it was odd. And we were sitting in ovaria. You know when you're a boy, and you sit in your stomach and you kick your feet? Yeah.

We were doing that. Wait, what? Is it on your stomach? You lie on your stomach and you kick your feet in the air. That's more of like a baby thing. On your boys? On your stomach? I can't visual.

Don't make me do that. Show us. On your stomach or on your back? On your show us. No. Your feet are sticking. Show us what you're doing. We were, you're thinking of your back.

We're quick. Turn the camera somewhere else. Oh, yeah. They turned it. What buddy you call? Oh. That's, is that boyish? Yeah.

That's pretty boys. That's a little boyish. I felt girlish. Do that after. What? Little League? It's boy. No, it felt girlish.

When would you do this? In my dream, I don't know. It's not something I did in real life. It's something I did. It's in my dream. Donnie, can we just do a sidebar? I'm sorry about Mark. Can we make them fucking sit in the hole?

All right. Mark. It's not the worst idea, but. Yeah. I'm trying to learn, Donnie. You're not. I know. That's the biggest lie.

That's the, that's the, that's the, you're not trying to learn shit. Mark's about to be your new sleep paralysis demon. All right, so let's get back to it. sleep paralysis and then you see you had a dream about Che. Mark, dial the back of notch, okay? Yeah, so I got him done. Che. So again, this slide, again, I don't think this really matters because, you know, everyone has weird dreams.

So it's, you know, if I pull 10 people and they would all probably have something similar. A boyish Chee dream? That's what, that was the one outlier. So you and Che were both on your bellies kicking feet. And pool hopping. A night pool hopping, which is pool hopping is. We were on my childhood deck, where I grew up. Che and I don't know why, side by side.

And then we went to the neighbors and pool hop. You jumped in their pool. That's like you jumped in their pool. And then you get out and go to the next neighbor. Is that how that works? Yeah, exactly. And you just keep jumping in pools around the neighbor. That sounds fucking awesome.

It was a good dream. Are you guys laughing as you do it, like pushing each other as you run to the... Splashing? See, again, like, you know, because I didn't... Dreams fade so fast. So the details by this point have escaped me. Yeah. but the concept was Jay and I

on a deck, pool hopping. Okay. It's a good concept. I guess next slide. I guess. All right, so yeah, so how do I do my dream? How do I dream like hell?

Do you guys want to know? Yeah, this is how we're reinventing dreaming. Yeah, this is the reinventing dream. That we're at the point of it, I guess. Next slide, please. What? Wait, whoa. Oh, no, it zooms in, I think.

Okay, all right, all right. How do I dream like how? Let's find out. Wouldn't you like to know, Mark? I don't even want to tell you anymore, actually. You want me to leave? No, you can hear, but minimal interaction would be great. All right, so I found a sweet spot.

Okay, so this is actually where it gets interesting. This has all been interesting, just so you know. Well, I appreciate it, but for me personally, as a researcher, this is where I got interesting. So it's about to ramp up. Well, don't hype, don't. Okay, sorry. You're in it. But you...

Brandon. Come on. Okay. You're going to make me lose my fucking thought now. My bad. God damn it. Oh, okay. So what do I...

What do I find? So you... People might notice this. I found that my... The most vivid dreams always happened when I woke up around 4 a.m. and went back to sleep. That stretch between 4 a.m. and wake... It was...

So I said, what the hell? Why is this? I agree with you on that. So I tested it. And I said in the alarm. I set an alarm for 2 a.m., 3 a.m., 4 a.m. every night I was trying to disrupt my sleep to find the right zone. This sounds like hell. The sweet spot.

The worst idea of possible. Yeah, well, science isn't for everyone. That's a fact. Yeah, buddy. We all would be scientists. So, yeah, so every night I was disrupting my sleep trying to figure out what's, and some nights, like the earlier, the earlier didn't work. The sweet spot was 4 a.m. or 5 a.m. Yep.

And I'd wake up and I'd have to stay awake for 20 minutes, I found. Oh. 20 minutes of not touch your phone, but just sitting there for 20 minutes. Because what I think was happening is your brain starts going nuts again, starts thinking. And then it, but your body says, I'm still, I'm not ready for this. I'm still tired. So let's shut it down. So your body gets shut down again, but your brain still was, you know, you turn that thing on. So that's why you have vivid dreams.

Damn. Because that actually happens to me. I would say my most vivid dreams are within the first, like, 40 minutes of falling asleep. And then what you just said, I'll wake up, most nights I'll wake up at like four or five and fall back asleep. Right. So my method is if we could come find some device or some way to wake you up 4 a.m. to make you dream is like what I want to invent. Like an alarm.

No, because that's too harsh. It has to be like heptic, haptic. Heptic feedback. subtly wake you up. Sully vibrate you or something. Just enough to, but your brain wakes up, but your body doesn't would be ideal. I have a way.

Wow. You move like an hour and a half away from your office, and then you have to wake up at 4 a.m. every morning to beat the traffic. Does that work for you? My deepest sleep happens after I get here, yes. See, okay. I go on to something. Right into deep sleep.

It's a big discovery. The longer you sleep, the closer you'd. Would you be interested in doing something like that? Moving an hour away? I could spend the week at his house. There's an empty house for you that you could purchase. Stay at Brandon's. There's one condition.

I didn't invite you. No, but we have a house that's about to be empty. You might have to deal with some guinea pigs, but other than that, it's a pristine condition. How do you do with guinea pigs? Yeah, that's how everybody.

That's the most common guinea pig. How many could you handle? Oh, a fleet of them. Oh, well, I got it. That's fine. 14? Once you have one, you might as well have 10. Yeah.

Gany pigs and lizards are the same in that category. Yeah. But if you're offering it, I would take a guinea pig, but I won't necessarily want one. That's what I said. That's the perfect guinea pig answer. All right. Eh, actually, no. I don't want it.

But you've already committed. No, that's the perfect guinea pig. Yeah. When someone says, do you want a guinea pig, you're like, eh, maybe, and then it takes you a second. You're like, no. Absolutely not. Now, Donnie, when you're saying you wake up, you go back to sleep, that gives you the best dreams. Does it give you the best rest, though?

Because part of what your whole Matt situation was, was saying you got to get the best rest. So is this counter to? Yeah, it's counter to. That's science. But that's science. You might have to pick one or the other. You might have to prioritize rest or dreams. That's, well, that's like the grand unifying theory.

What is that trying to do? What's what we're trying to do here? Yeah. Grand Unifying theory, if you're not familiar, it's, well, it's, well, that's like the grand unifying theory. if you're not familiar, it's how fucking how much time do you have? Just enough. Probably enough time to hear

a simple definition of that. The what is it? The grand unifying theory. Okay. Okay. I get here a quick summary for sure. So one sentence on it would be fine. It's...

Then it's the grand unifying theory? It's unifying, I'm pretty sure it's unifying relativity and quantum mechanics. Yeah. Right? You're laughing, but I'm pretty sure

I have no idea. I've never heard of this. Yeah, grand unifying theory is you unify quantum mechanics and theory. Einstein can never get around to understanding quantum mechanics. Spooky action at a distance fear threw him off. And he just refused to believe it. So which they haven't figured out. I'm pretty sure Hawking before he's dead, right?

Yeah. Before he died, he was trying to unify. That's why the movie's called The Theory of Everything. Boom. Knew I had it. So yeah. Okay, good explanation. And that answered the sleeping and the...

Well, that, yeah. I'm so I'm basically Stephen Hawking to sleep. Okay. All right. But not the question perfectly. Petaphoffield part. He's a, he was a little St. James.

Well, move on. Let's move on from that. That hit you pretty heavily. Yeah, that really, I think you know a fucking guy and then he does that shit.

Yeah. Don't. All right. Next spot. Okay. This one I really wasn't sure I wanted to use. But.

I mean, it can't get worse for me, right? What? What does it mean? Well, okay. Who is, what we're looking at? So there's another way to, there's another way to dream. And it's, this is, okay, so this is getting back to Steve Jobs. So he's basically in a hypnotic state, hypnotic state.

Yeah. So what you're seeing is a picture here. This is my, I had a personal hypnotist for a while when I lived in New York. on. A personal hypnotist? I would see a hypnotist. That's your personal hypnotist? That's Jeffrey Rose, yeah. Okay. You'd go to a hypnotist?

Why didn't you tell us? Well, it's never come up, and it's not something I like to I don't bring it up at a whim, but I've already said studded belt, so he might as well talk about it. You're right. How often do you see him? For a little bit, like probably twice a month, and

then I saw him a couple of phone. I did a couple phone ones, which I think was a scam. he could have been a Charlton, but he is a nice guy, so I kept going back. And he was hypnotizing you? He was hypnotizing me regularly. What was it? What was regularly? Yeah, like twice a month.

How did you find this man? I actually don't know. It's probably four or five years ago now. It was a while ago, but he had a nice place, Upper West Side. His office was just a chair in him. But he would do, just a chair and what else? Just his chair, my chair, or his hypnotist chair. But he would induce dreams.

He could induce dreams. And how much did you pay him? That's where he might have been a Charlton. Okay. It was $250 a session. Oh, my God. And what was your goal going in? Just to, I thought it would help iron things out.

I, yeah. And then he could put me on these pills. He gave me like, this was your doctor, Donnie. No, no, no, he didn't prescribe. It was a pill you could only get in Norway. Okay. And it was... Oh, he's got a Wikipedia.

Yeah, he's a sleep specialist. You were in rehab. And he gave you pills? What did the pills do? They were a fish oil that he had developed. He got him from a conference. He would go to like a convention almost. Developed them. Founded them naturally at a conference.

Well, yeah, yes. He extracted them from... But he called them like Serabella film. I've tried to find it. It doesn't exist. anymore but he said keep you said keep one in your car keep one in your backpack keep a bottle in your nightstand and basically every every every like waking moment uh every couple hours you should be taking this pill and i was like all right he's like it'll increase brain power like 10 full it was

basically fish oil and then like some some kind of incoction that i don't know that i i would like to think so i would like to think so but then years ago or when i moved here i tried to track down because i was buying it from him i was trying to try i tracked down the company that the number on the bottle and it went to like it's like a guy's cell phone that picked up and he was shocked that anyone had ever called him so I don't know what

like how long were you taking these pills for man every all as long as I lived in New York around the clock yeah and how did it oh wow yeah I mean a while it made me feel good I thought you were feeling clear it was

he pitched it as like a limitless type like of brain clarity again the guy I mean he bought he got I mean, that's Chris says you probably need to know about the guy. He told me that he gets his suits at estate sales. So I don't love that. A suit to the state sale?

A guy sold you to the limitless place. That's when people die and they open up their house to come in and buy stuff. Yeah, I didn't like to hear that. But how did that come up at? Because he gives me advice. He was giving me advice. And one was get your suits in estate sales? Yeah.

So he takes like, well, this guy's possession? This is now the presentation. Got it. This story is. Now the episode. It's a little bit more than stick here. Tom Ripley-esque that I didn't. That's when I started to shy away from him.

And then I did a couple phone sessions with him once I moved here. And I was like, I think I'm just getting robbed. How many sessions would you say you've done? I don't know. I don't want to think about it, to be honest. How many pills would you say you've taken? Bottles. There's a more important question.

How much money would you estimate that you... Again, that's what I don't want to think about it. I've already spent it. How much were the pills? Expensive. Those were not cheap. The ones that you took around the clock. Hundreds of dollars, yeah.

And you bought them from him? Directly from him. Big Cats got a question. I got a question for you, Donnie. Have you been in the Matrix? No, but they were red pills. They were a red pill. I think you've been in the Matrix.

It was a red pill. I wish it was like a cooler, I wish it had like psychological effects. It didn't. You wish you were taking psychedelics? No, because I've seen how that ends. Yeah. How? Bad.

Right. can you walk me through? You were just This was when you were in New York You're getting hypnotized twice a month What's a session? Can you walk me through? Like what is a session like?

Sure. So a session is basically like You walk in and like the first couple He has to get to know you And you know background, this and that And then once he knows you It's easy. You walk in he turns on he has like this box

Like this old looking sound box Wasn't not quite a radio It just it had one button It did one sound and it was like a gurgling like kind of like hurts 432 but it was just a hypnosis I guess you want to call you got it's like a sound bath he closed the blinds and he would do

you would sit in the chair he'd elevate your feet it was an easy boy and then he would say all right what do you want me to implant it was a what? It was a lazy boy okay what did I say easy boy that's fine that's more the Stephen Hawkins and you yeah well I think people say both things

easy boy lazy easy boy is the same thing I actually don't want to argue with you because you're on a hot Yeah, yeah, because Yep, spook Yep So he would So yeah, so then you'd say

This is what I want This is what I want you to do And then he would do it And he would put you under And it got easier each time Each time you go under it's easier So do you remember anything from the sessions? Not once you go under, no

Give me all your money No, it's not like Hypnosis doesn't work like that It's also works different for every people Like you can resist it if you want You can be hypnotized against your will That's a common misconception. You have to willingly go under,

to be hypnotized, you have to accept it. And so, why is that funny? What the fuck? I didn't like, I was, I was thinking of,

I was Nick, I was thinking of a movie. Was he eliciting sleep? Or was he getting you to do things? It wasn't like, I don't know, it wasn't getting me to do things, no,

but it was just like, okay, I want, say you wanted to stop vaping. Okay, you say, hey, I want to stop vaping. You go under, you have, after you come out,

fucking, know you wouldn't even want to look at a cigarette. Did you do that? I never really struggled with vaping, but I had him say, just knock it off just to get it out of there, nicotine and all that shit. You preemptively got rid of vaping. Yeah, I mean, I would suck a vape every now and then, sure. Do you do nicotine?

I try, I really don't. I'll do it, you know, for fun if someone has it. And they say, try this, I'll do it, but I don't carry it around. I don't have it on me. Shout to the doctor. Yeah, so I'm saying, okay, but yeah, and then there's other things you can implant, you know, There's things I told him to say that I won't share.

Like, well, I won't share them. One that you would share. Okay. I don't know. It's like, again, it's so it's like, it's stuff that it's like hard to even describe. I just do one that you won't share. No, but you can ask him like I want to be like smarter. I want to be more, you know, like a, you stop procrastinating and didn't get my shit done, you know, like that.

And did those work? For a little bit, but then you have to keep going back. So he was, if it's, to like break habits and compulsory. Yeah, exactly. habits and compulsions. And he was charging you $250? Yeah, I bit my nails. Like that shit, like, yeah.

Plus the pills. So are you back to biting your nails now that? No, I don't buy my nails. I haven't bit my nails since. Love that. Okay. So to get rid of the bad habits, you just had to regularly pay $2.50 to this guy and take pills. Again, yeah.

Like, good guy. Like, honestly, I thought he was a good. Like, if I saw him on the street, I'd say, he's a nice, you know, nicest can be. But he might have been a charloth. I don't know. I don't know if he was, if he was making $2.50 off me, who knows how much he's making off somebody with less.

of a clear set on what they wanted from them. Okay. All right, let's keep going. And why break glass? What does that mean? Because I wasn't sure if I was going to use the slide. Oh, he used it. Okay.

This was if I needed. And then what's Cheat code? I'm interested in Cheeco. Because he's a cheat code to sleep and dreams. Ah. Okay. That was good. What's the woman doing?

Who's she? That's a AI. She's sleeping? I don't, I just, I don't know what I served. I search dream, I think. Why is she in the Cheek code slide? The cheat code is the same thing I don't know he's the cheek coat and she's dreaming

We don't have to get into it Okay alright next slide Oh yeah, it's pills Oh okay oh we covered that yeah maybe a bad guy Why is pills in quotes Because I don't know what they were I don't really know what was in him There were pills

Yeah they were physical pills What's his name? Jeffrey Ross or Jeffrey Rose Okay That's the roast master Jeffrey Rose Short guy, frail guy But again fucking nice is can be

I pictured him as like a guy that has a house in the Berkshire's and is always in the woods. You pictured him. You knew him. Right, but I only, I knew him in the confine of a small room. Right. I don't know what he did when he left besides go to estate sales. To buy his suits. Okay, next slide.

I think we're done. Oh, no. Oh, well, this one, you lied to me. Yeah, this one I just. And it's a, F, F, F, C, T. Well, it can effect, too. No. No, it can have an effect.

We don't have to get too caught up. Sorry. Does cancer have an effect on dreams? Is my question. Period. Period. There's another. There's cancer again.

There it is. How do you know? It doesn't say cancer on the cell. Does that say Danny Conrad? That's a Danny Conrad. That's not what mine looks like. Danny Conrad. Does cancer affect dreams?

Yes, it makes them come true. How? What? Explain. Oh. Does cancer affect dreams? And my answer was yes. It makes them come true.

Danny, you can share your thoughts on this. You just told us that that wasn't actually what a dream is. That'd be a wish. That didn't happen while I was sleeping. Make a wish, not make a dream. I don't know what to believe it. What's the difference? There's a lot of cops.

You tell me. You told us. You told us to be- Martin Luther King had a wish. Yeah. And then he said we couldn't Chinese dream, but then he had a dream with Che. So in conclusion, so yeah, in conclusion, I would say a dream is whatever you wanted to be then.

So you think about it. And it's a more of it should be personal. and does everyone have to know what you dream? I don't actually, I don't think so. I agree. Looking back on this, I kind of wish I never told anyone my dreams or about the hypnotist. It has been fast. This is an incredible presentation.

Did you at least learn something? Yes. Yes. I hope you all learned something you, I don't give a fuck about. But if I learned a dream as a wish your heart makes. That's beautiful. When you're fast asleep. Better than I.

It's honestly more eloquent than I could have said it. So I'll give you points on that. Okay. Donnie, you did it again. You did it again? This is a great presentation. I don't know if I did. This one, I felt a little rushed, and I apologize

if it wasn't up to... No, it was great. I didn't know what I didn't learn so much about the Chinese. Yeah. Yeah, I didn't either. They weren't... They just found their way in there. They snuck in like they always do.

Because they were like... Oh, man. What? Yeah, well... What? Like they always do. Yeah. We don't...

We all tell you about it off. Okay, I'd like to hear that. And she was, she was Korean? I think Japanese. Jeff, okay. Taylor. That was incredible. Donnie.

I'm addicted to your presentations. Yep. I need more of them. I don't know how many more I have. Well, you have due science. That one I do. Yes, fuck, okay. Can our Booker reach out to Jeffrey Rose?

No, no, you don't because I don't want to cross him. That's not a guy you want to cross. I thought you liked him. What do you mean? We were not going to cross him? It was a nice guy. Yeah, yeah. But if you like, you like, you like, you don't.

That's messing with something I honestly don't want to mess with. Okay. I shouldn't have said his name. We'll respect your dreams or wishes. Yeah. I don't know. Back to square one. Wait a second.

It froze me there. Does this guy still have control over you? No, that's not what it. It was never a control. If he came in here right now and he snapped, would you be out? No, so I try. So this, I said he's not going to want to hear this. Yeah, good.

Cover your mic. No. I'm not even going to say. tried another hypnotist. No, no, no. I did something that may possibly illegal, so I'm not going to say it.

Don't, yeah, don't, yeah. Did you record a session to see what happens? I'm not going to say, but it's close to that. Is it exactly that? It's close to that, but I, but that he got me. I don't know, he had like a fool,

he had some way of getting around that. What do you mean? He taught you? He noticed the audio was, noticed the light on your medical license. The audio, the audio was all in chunks. of 10 seconds with a pause. Like you couldn't string anything

he said together. Weird, I know, but I don't know how he did it. That might be the box. Damn. He was... I don't know. I don't know.

Talk about spooky action. He was on to you? I just think that's what he did. I don't know. But by the end, and then I didn't pay him for a while and then his next text... His next text were all just like,

you got to pay me, you got to pay me, you got to pay me. I wonder when my last text to him was. So you're in debt to him. Why didn't you pay? He didn't make you. you pay beforehand?

Oh, yeah, read the texts. I said, hey, Jeff, sorry for a delay. Just made payment. I appreciate the session, but honestly, this time I feel like it didn't work. I don't want to read this, actually. This time, I didn't feel like it was that deep took hold. I don't think anything took hold. Previously, it felt it was much better session.

This time I didn't notice any changes. So, so, yeah, I guess my last, that was the last text. My last session wasn't great with him. So we've part of work. Did he ever answer? He just said, thanks for paying me. Okay. So that's, yeah.

I would prefer you guys not to reach out. No, we won't. We'll respect your... Because in his mind, we are still friends. Or whatever, whatever he called hypnotists and his client. Pretty sure it's all doctor patient. Pretty sure he doctor patient covers everything, so... Did you guys, like, talk outside of the sessions?

Amicable way? He walked me to the subway. Yeah. Oh, yeah. We were friends. What are his hobbies? That I don't know. Why do he walk you to the subway?

I don't know. He was off to something else. Interesting guy. Yeah, nice guy. I should reach out, I think. I don't know. Maybe not, but. Well, you nailed this, and I do want, do science.

You have, like, basically 12 days. Do you think you can get it done? I mean, I have to get it done. I don't have a choice. Yeah, I mean, next week, no one's going to be here. So this one is on just the idea of science? No, it's your, what you use the money for. It's like Shark Tank for science experiments.

Yeah. Like, I want to know what you think of science, what you think you're going to do with science, what you're going to prove with science. Got it. And then I will fund it. Imagine you do a sleep study, but Big Cat's funding it. Yeah. Oh, that would be awesome. If I actually get into a lab and use my device.

Oh, wait, your device. device. Well, you know, I've told you about this device plenty of times. I'm still waiting on it. The one that I've kicked started like six years ago. Oh, the mask. The VR mask. It's not a VR mask. It's a sleep mask that's supposed to make you dream. But yeah, when did you? How much? The founder, the founder keeps update. That was $700. And when do you, when were you supposed to get it? Before we left New York. So a long time ago, two years. It was another guy's Kickstarter. Yeah. Yeah. But I get updates from the founder by monthly or, or, you know, or, you know, So it says it's coming, just delayed.

We need that. What does, yeah, you did show me the goggles. It's sleep, so it's actually, I mean, it's like, if, I'm glad I got in as early as I did, because what it is is goggles, it's a sleep mask that you put on. And it basically take the technology of the mat, the mat that I have, and it will induce your brain into a sleep-like state whenever you want it. And then it will, like, and basically help you, basically help you dream. And then when you want to wake up, it shoots waves.

your brain and then there's lights in the eyes. It makes it sound like the sun's rising. Is reality that bad for you? You want to dream this much? No, this is not really for dreams. This is more for sleeping. This is more deep sleep. But yeah, I kickstarted it and I haven't... But why did you say you're happy to get in on this early? Because he said if you don't get in on early, if you buy the mask once we're in mass production,

you have to pay a yearly fee to use the mask. So I got lifetime for free. But you don't even have it yet. No. But when I get it, it'll be free. for life. I love that. Why you look disappointed? I got it down the ground floor. No, I'm just looking at you in awe and wonder.

So you did 700 bucks. Yep. That's not. How long have you been waiting? Give or take five years? Okay. Oh, good thing. Technology takes time.

Pretty sure Apple is the same way. One's the first computer. Five years after. Agreed. Donnie, that was incredible. I'm in awe. I love you. I love you.

you. The AC audience loves you. You're loved. Loved. Yeah. Appreciate it. Do we feel good? What was your takeaway after the presentation? My takeaway was... You know, he's just kind of leaving abruptly there.

What are you doing? Well, no, my takeaway was that I just need more Donnie in my life. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I love him. I think that's ever... His brain is interesting. He's got interesting stories. He's a man who's seen and done things. Like, I'm a pussy. I would never go to a hypnotist and take weird pills.

No, I would feel like I'm being scammed. I pay almost $1,000 a month and... I would never do that. So I like that there is someone who would do that and tell us about it. You know, that's what they say. Yeah, exactly. That's what they say. So...

Dude. Wow. What just happened? He's the fucking best... Ever. Thing that has ever happened to this show. Ever. Ever.

I won't... Even if he made that up. I don't think you did. You didn't. But you know how we were always like, how do we not know he was like this? Maybe he wasn't. It was the pills. And the hypnotist.

He was taking the limitless pills. But also, how much could we scam him? Around. Oh, my God. He was a medical captive. Five years in New York. Around the clock red pills. He's getting hypnotized.

Pills that were extracted. He hated regularly. He hated the idea. idea of doing nicotine every so often, so he took pills constantly. He preemptively, so as to not. He was never addicted to nicotine. Uh-uh. But he preemptively kicked the habit by taking pills every day. Around the clock. Non-stop.

Should we check on Donnie? Yeah, let's see. Fuck off, Mark. Oh, he had that up earlier. He's paranoid. Oh. He's watching. He's watching the show.

Well, he's watching the show. He's not working. Mark, go up there and write like Idiot working Tell him we need the whiteboard Quiet idiot at work Just try to sneak up No gay chef

Yeah, yeah right Gay chef at work He just said that just out of nowhere Don't call me gay chef It was nuts They say nobody's ever call me gay chef or something It was like he was Nobody calls me gay chef.

He was so, so wasted. And he was just like, yeah, he was like, nobody's ever called me gay chef. What are you talking about? There we go. Where's the marker, though? Oh, it's on the floor. Oh, no. Not locked in he is.

Where is it? Oh, Mark's trying to sneak. Oh, he's trying to not, he's trying to change the board without tipping off that he's there. That's going to be impossible. Yeah, that marker ruined his plan. Wait a second. Oh, God. Is he watching the show?

He's not even wearing headphones, right? This guy's something else. There's no way. Oh, no. You made it wait for him. Almost got there. Good one. I kept waiting for him.

So good. So good. Yup, that's where the camera is. Oh, I'm so excited. Chef, we are all on your side. I don't believe it for a second. I am. Chef, this is my favorite day of the week when you do these things.

Oh, it's weekly? I love them. I love that. It's not weekly. If it's not weekly, I need an appearance fee. YouTube subs. Sub to my YouTube. You work here.

Look, man. Yeah, you do work here. This is all from McCarthy. I'm taking McCarthy. Not listening to McCarthy. Where is he? Yeah, wait. Did he reach out to you on his own?

You already make good money. I understand that. You don't give an appearance for you work here. I don't want an appearance fee. I'm saying, if you guys are going to bombard me. It's low, it raises my blood pressure. That is what you're saying. Stop listening to McCarthy

right now. What? Did he end up independently, like getting your ear? He did. What do you know he's going to want to cut? Yeah, that's fine. I don't need money. I don't want money. Can we just start the presentation? It's on you. I don't know. I don't like that you're on edge. I need to be relaxed. So monthly, whatever

it is, whenever you come in here, it's my favorite day. Okay, well, that's good. Are you excited about all the research you put in? Yeah, this is, I did, I found some interesting things. We'll be presenting a theory, an idea, or just facts. McCarthy ruined Donnie. Yeah, he did. Fucking McCarthy got involved. McCarthy's a piece of shit. Okay, well, then I take back what I said.

He's also trying to fuck with you, you know that? I can't tell. Who's trying to fuck with me at this point? We're not. We're on your side. Maybe Mark. You're about to get sure with unlimited funding. All right, let's start. Okay. All right, the wonders of science.

Adani do science presentation. Okay, exploring the science and celebrating the pioneers of science like myself. Okay. Good start. Yep. Next slide, please. At the universe. What makes a good scientist?

Click. Well, let's slow down here. Oh, no. What? Oh, Jesus. Being in a wheelchair. That's a pedophile. That's a pedophile.

Can we slow down? Can we back up? Let's back up a slide. Okay. You were supposed to say something. I want you to be in a better mood. Mm-hmm. You want to walk back in? Yeah.

Let's restart. You know what? Let's refresh. flush it all, Donnie. You know, I'm going to take a piss. Let's refresh every. Yeah. Because that was, you were yelling that presentation at us.

We got to kill Jack McCarthy. He did. Fuck you, Jeff. Tell Jack to shut the fuck up, Max. Jet, I need you in the room. I need you. No, you do. God damn it.

Why would Jack be meddling like this, though? What's in it for him? Jack ruined, Jeff. The one pure thing we had, and he ruined it. Why? Why would he do that? Because he's a piece of shit. Appearance fee.

He works here. Also, this is a presentation for a grant, which would be... Yeah, this is all for Donnie's benefit today. McCarthy ruined him. Now, is he just about to explain to us what scientists are for the next? I don't know. That's fine if he is. It is, yes, totally.

Just curious. He's going to get the funding no matter what. What are doing? What is he doing? Is he changing something? Is he doing the 4%? And also, yeah, the final 4% are we not just going to give him

like five more minutes to finish? Was this like a... Is he getting rid of the pedophile? The final 4% is half the presentation. Right. Oh, God. Yeah, I don't think you knew percentages. The 4% is bigger than the 9-6.

All right. I don't want our boy compromised. Everybody relax. Everybody chill out. It's been the end of a long season. We're all going on vacation tomorrow. Look how tired. Yeah, look how tired.

What if that? He was disriled up after hanging with Jack McCarthy? Oh, my God. What if he's just presenting how tired he is? Oh, and he walks in and he's like, what you just saw? Look how tired. That's how it would be if I didn't have my mat. Right.

I would, I'd be, if we'd have to get Big Cat to sign off on it, but I would be on board with firing Jack McCarthy. I'm fine with that. Yeah. I don't know what he does. It kind of lurks around all day. Skulks around. Cocaine.

Yeah. cocaine. He's going to He's going to He's going to He is? Yeah He's going to be

even worse with hair I know They probably have cocaine and turkey I think that gets Murder We're doing a hard Resil on attitude

Yeah Everything Nice walk up here Flush it all Yeah Fresh dark You're reset No he's gonna

Think he's gonna take that As well Come in with positive vibes So what do Darkness and light Coming in here Right now

For the board I would do it I was gonna give him the board do anything for this this is good big cats distracting him yeah i think he just got himself a free karam board he's gonna be he's gonna be in a good mood okay you've been into karam for a while don't have been off for the karam board i also told him that he has to understand with my money in his brain there's literally nothing we can't do nothing we're like batman so we're in a better spot now donnie yes mark we're in a good spot what did i tell you before we got in i said you could probably go home

board. We're on your side. Yeah, I agree. And Brandon, you agree. We're like Batman together. Yeah. I'm your Alfred. He's a joker. Yes. And Brandon, you agree to not bring up that he had two weeks to work on this and wait until well afternoon. Brandon? You can do that? Do you agree to do that? I agree. I agree. See what's going on here? I didn't do it. I agree. I'm not bringing it up. He's right. We won't bring it up. We won't bring it up. So that's how you want to restart. That's how you want to restart. That's how you want to restart, Mark. Nice. Let's have a nice. That's not how I restarted, Donnie. I am fully.

At attention right now. Let's have a nice, clean start. Clean start. Presentation. There we go. And let's just agree. No pedophiles in the presentation. Fair.

All right. It's every scientist. Okay. You might be on to something. All right. But the first slide, never mind. What makes a good scientist? The first slide said you were.

Oh, shit. All right. Okay. Is he a scientist or is he a... Yeah. Keep clicking. Who's that Franklin? That's not Ben Franklin as Isaac Newton, buddy.

Yep. Sorry. Albert Einstein, next. Married his cousin. Neil deGrasse Tyson. Next. Forget his name. Okay.

George Foreman? George Foreman? Vanderholyfield? That would be funny. George Foreman? I actually don't know. Forman Grill. Who is that?

Next one. That's a vendor-holyfield either. Elon Musk. Almost a pedophile. Almost. Just Bill. missed it. Next slide.

So now we... Boom. Oh, yo! Johnny, we're so bad. Okay. What makes the scientist? So here we have some of my favorites and then recently less of a favorite

scientist. What makes them all good? Let's see. Next slide. Well, a lot of things. Okay. Next slide. But mostly.

Next slide A Beautiful Mind Yeah Well done You're getting good at Prezzi's Yes Thank you Mm-hmm

Yeah we're in the universe right now That's actually a movie about a scientist So it's a double It's a double It's a double It's a double meaning Okay So a beautiful mind

Next slide Oh Combined with Yeah Mathematician What is math What is math if it's not science Math.

Well, they have two different subjects in school. It's math and science, though. Is everything science? Yes. That might be what we're building up to. Okay. Combined with. Next.

That's an autistic. Autism? Love. Oh. A beautiful mind combined with love. That's what makes a good science. Rain man. I love that.

Another science movie. Ish. Ish. more math both math what did I just say about math and science science same

intertwined I'm on you I'm the most on your side okay and love is important you can't have science without love

you don't love you don't love what you do you're never going to be a good scientist yep facts you'll never be a good scientist God forbid we give you a test tube

next slide God fucking forbid oh okay pose a question how do I myself How do I achieve a beautiful mind with love? What film is this? That's Nicholas Cage.

And I don't know who the woman is, but he looks... Cole Kimman? No, what's your name? Meg Ryan? Maybe, but to me, Nicholas Cage is the all-encompassing, beautiful mind with love. I agree. You love National Treasure. The favorite movie.

Nicholas Cage is the best. Nicholas Cage is, yeah. So this picture has nothing to do with Meg Ryan per se. This is more of like... It's Nicholas Cage. It's Nicholas Cage. We're focused on Nick Cage. He's got a beautiful mind.

Yes, with love. Yeah. Okay, so how do I achieve this? This is the ultimate goal, is this photo. This is what I'm looking for to be a good scientist. You actually are getting good at these presentations. We've got a goal, and now we're going to find a way to get to it. Yeah, and I did this all in no time.

So imagine if I had two weeks to be worse. Brandon, you said you wouldn't bring it up. Okay. I got your back, Donnie. Don't bring up the two weeks thing. Got you. What do you not understand? Brandon.

I didn't say that. I didn't say anything. You gave me two weeks. I gave myself an hour. Well, why didn't? Because. Works better under pressure. Thank you.

What does pressure make? Diamonds. What is that? Science. Now we're getting something. Now we're learning. Now we're learning. All science.

Okay. Everything is science. Okay. All right. Now we're getting somewhere. Next slide. Didn't realize I had that in there, but yeah. How do I?

Okay. Let's do that again. How do you achieve, how do I achieve a beautiful line with love? You, how do you do it? Good question, Mark. Nope. You just fucking ask you. That's all you got to say.

That's it is how. All I wanted you to say was how. That's not I guessed it, Mark. So hold on, let's try it again. How do you, you ask me? You teed them up for that. Never mind. Next slide.

No, but that's, Mark. Okay, Mark, you guess. Guess something. You guessed it. Next slide. China. Oh, here we go. We go to China.

Yeah. Okay. All roads. Now we're getting somewhere. Next slide. Was that just to hit the China quota? Why China? Nope.

Why China? Okay. I just wait a hold and let me take a picture. They dream it over there? Why China? Okay. Next slide. Thanks for asking.

Nobody asked, but thank you for trying. Why China? Thank you. Next slide. Okay. In order to obtain a beautiful mind, I have to reset my chi. Do you mean IQ? An odor?

That's how you pronounce chi. That's chi, like the life force in your body? Exactly. An odor to obtain a beautiful... Again, I did this under a time constraint, and I didn't add time to spell check. You didn't give them a lot of time. Go back to it. That was just tight down.

I didn't get a second round to go through it. Of course your shit spelled wrong. You ever wrote a first track of anything, nothing spelled right. You wrote a book? Yeah, nothing was spelled right the first time. I bet some things were spelled right. The basic words. Yeah. Again. Order.

Yeah. I spelled Chi right. None of you guys knew that. That's true. I did. Me and Chee. All right. So, to become a good scientist, I need to get my Chee in order. What's up, Chee? Your hair looks sick. Thanks. Next slide. I can't hear him. Said thanks.

This was a... Delete this wasn't supposed to be in. You want to go back? Pedify. I have some questions that Plato might have invented Socrates? Yeah, you never heard that theory? That Plato just invented Socrates, so he sounded more insightful because Socrates has no written. Plato wrote all of Socrates's work down for him.

So he has never written anything himself. He's written. So all his work is done through Plato. Sweet. He exists in theory. So Nick Plato, Brandon Socrates. I write for Socrates. What do I say about Nick?

No. Never mind. So talk about how Brandon just doesn't exist. It's just Nick writing stuff. Got it. I put my foot down. I'm not true. Got it.

Do you like Socrates? I'm indifferent. I think he was a pedophile. Yeah, but they all were. Greeks, that was just sexually acting hands back then. It's like a beanbag chair. Yeah, everybody's half in their basement. Everyone's got one.

It was got a little boy. Yeah. What? Nothing. Do you like Socrates? You're going to say Socrates's nuts, aren't you? I thought you bought that coming yeah you got that all right don't even try um all right so back to yeah okay so enter master goo okay so this is what I found in my hour of research uh the apples

ignore as a noon okay to reset your chi I'm gonna have to travel of china so this is all gonna start it this yep he's gonna start in china there's a guy in the wudang mountains named master chi and I will study under him to reset my chi in master goo mr this is master goo yeah goo or chi? Goo. Goo resets my cheat. It gets confusing. Goo's on first here. Yeah. So I'm going goo. I'm going goo to cheat. Will goo accept you? Goo will accept me. He accepts all applicants. I love that. I think. You're going to China for some Gucci. Gucci?

You could say that. That was nice. Okay. Well done, Mark. All right. I like this. So you need a trip to China. Done. Okay. So next slide, please. So what will I do with Master Gu? Well, what I learned from Master Goo? That's, again, not him. But we didn't get time to polish. Scottish man from a whiskey commercial. Yeah, I believe that's a scientist.

What I learned for Master Gu? I think next slide. Okay, so phase one is the sleeping crane. Okay? So this first protocol, Master Gu believes the Westerners sleep wrong, and I'm very interested in sleep at the moment. So he's going to make me sleep on a wooden bench

or a stone of some sort in the Taoist posture where my gallbladder will, facing the meridian to that's the first step so i have to sleep on wood or stone uh don't why is that funny brandon what is it is it that guy's sleeping correctly so let's go back so that's a yeah that guy's that's how i'll be sleeping i'm presumed that guy's on fentanyl don't think so don't think so so does it yeah master goo is a real guy master goos a wudong master this is what you will do to go get to the root of science?

To reset my cheat. Before I can do any science, I need to get a beautiful mind. This is how I get a beautiful mind. So you're pitching an experiment right now. You have to go to these mountains and shine. Yeah, so in a way this could be the first experiment. But you've been to China, right? Did you ever hook up with goo? No, this is before my time. Goo's not there now now? What was before your time?

Goo's there now, yeah. That was before my time of knowing science. That was before my path, my journey began. Okay. Goo wasn't even on my radar. So let's say you got a trip to China like in May or June. You could go to goo. I'll have to I'll have to reach out to goo, but I'm sure that would work. Okay.

It seems presumably yes. This is all to get you in the right head space to do the science. Yeah, but it's science. In turn, it's science. It's a meta. It's a meta. Speaking of science, can you explain the significance of the gallbladder facing the meridian? What is that doing?

Don't know. That's more of a goo question than me. I don't, you know, do you ask the master how to paint? No, you just do what he says. That would. No. Okay. Right.

Back to the slideshow. What if you asked? Is that the gallbladder, Donnie? That's a gallbladder. So that's something we can get removed and live without, though. Tell you what to do, you have to ask. So the gallbladder, and that in the middle is a meridian, and on the left is a guy sleeping on stone.

Okay? All right. Is that the prime meridian? That would be the prime meridian. What is the prime meridian? KB. It's the up and down equator. Exactly.

It bisects the earth into the western and eastern hemisphere. Where is it? The middle of the world goes through. England and Africa Got it So you would face that So yeah But presumably

Okay so That's phase one of Master Goose training There you go So it might be that marine Okay yep Yeah But that's not in China You just got to face east

So you mean you see You're going as far away as possible from that Again you're not supposed to be on it I'm not questioning this guy's teaching Yeah Aren't you Oh I guess if he's long

as you're going east or west you're facing it we're facing it right now i don't know at least some of us are now i am i'm getting close being hooked i'm facing you're facing it i am as well donnie you're not i'm not in china he's right true okay okay so next slide sure that's a little cool back all that's a call it call back okay phase two that's phase one the sleeping crane phase two next slide okay internal alchemy so this is where it's interesting

strict diet of pine needles goji berries and mountain mountain mist to clear brain fog so this is this is never done something like this before I've never eaten pine needles goji berries but that's master goo up there that's a guy eating a bull of

pine needles look healthy as a rock and then that's a mountain that's Healthiest or healthy. Rocks are. Do live a long time. So, this is all clearing my chi to, to,

do you think your chi is clogged right now? Very, extremely. The mat's helping, that shit is helping, but. So your current diet. This will fast track it. Would you say it's bad or just not that? It's not that.

Yeah. It's not that. I wouldn't say it's great. For how long would you have to do this diet? Not sure how long this program is. Again, the research, I got to dive in a little.

further, but I got the outline. I got the big picture. And for the folks just tuning in, she is what? She is your internal flow state of your vibe. It's life force. Life force energy, you name it, it's everything. It's all everything at once and nothing at the same time. It's like the force.

You could say that. That's the most realistic way of putting it. Oh. It's like the force. It's like the force. You're joking, you're serious. Move on. Okay. I'm setting you to China.

Yeah. So this is going to cost you. Very expensive. No, no, this is going to, I did it. His program costs like a grand. Flights probably cost, you know, $1,200. Done. So, you know, five grand maybe.

Total? Pine needles. We forgot about the pine needles. A grand for the program. $1,200 for the flight. How much is a rock a night? Can Master Gou teach you math? Look, you always buffer when it comes to budgets.

Right, right. Because you hate to go over it. Yeah, yeah. Look, if I come back under budget, you're going to go, holy shit. Yeah, you're right. If I go over budget, so you always go, you always say more. Maybe it might cost 10, who knows. Yeah.

Oh, okay. Okay, next slide. I want, I want this for you. So, yeah, so by the end of it, I'll think I'll come back ready. Next slide. Okay. This is phase three. He does bone setting and moxibustian.

Moxibustin. Bust. You got it. Someone read that word. Moxie Bustian? That's what I said, the first. time so we're right yeah so you basically burn sage on your body and any bones he'll reset all your bones sounds like a drag queen name moxie yeah it does all out the Wi-Fi talks yeah and this is an

ancient art of drawing out the Wi-Fi toxin well now now it focuses more on the Wi-Fi toxin what's the photo of the right the photo of the right is a guy bone setting not master she this is not an Asian man. He looks, he does look a little suspect. Now I'm looking at him. He's got the Hitler stash. Brandon? Yeah. Science requires asking questions. Of course.

What if Master Gou is full of shit? No. No, that's a question. I mean, there's only one way to find out. He's on Instagram. I don't like it. Yeah, I don't like love that. Oh, look at him. I don't know. Just looks.

Ooh, you can go to Romania. That's coming out. to Chicago? I think he goes to the card convention. Okay. Master goo. Just a question. Apologize.

Mark texted me to ask it. Okay. Well, stop doing that. That's not even allowed. I won't answer any. I won't field any more of your questions. Me? I'm out of questions?

You're out of questions. Oh, you could do an online academy. No, no, no. No, he needs to go to China. Now this guy might... That's just more Wi-Fi. This might be a hoax. Oh, no.

Oh, no. This is a clean website. See, I don't like that he has a website. Bring seven-day trial means he just wants your information and then charges you anyway. Well, look at the mountain. No, I'm back in. That looks legit. Yeah, you're right. Look at that. Is that goo? That's goo.

Can we hear him? For the past 15 years, I have been in Chinese, Tai Chi, Chig, and natural living in my home, the wonderful Wudang Mountains, China. Not everyone can get to China, but I know you want wellness practices you can fit into your everyday life. Now I'm delighted to say, thanks to internet technology, I can come to you. Well, that defeats the purpose of everything, Gu. Oh, no, Goo. No, you've got to get there. The crane.

We're going to Goo. I'm not doing online classes. You got to go to Goo. I might have to find someone better than goo if he's this kind of guy. But you get the concept. I got to go to China to reset my cheat. What will you be incorporating? a new master maybe learn kung fu is he Asian grant cardone

I would hate that yeah although you did like grant cardone I know but I don't want two of them you know I won't yeah but an Asian one either way I think he's going to do something for me yep agreed either way if he resets my chi and helps me dream better we've achieved something yep so it's an experiment in it of itself agreed is it not yeah it's doing science on yourself. This is, yeah. What's your hypothesis, Donnie? Will I become a more

enlightened and cheerful person? That's not a hypothesis. You ask a hypothesis is a question. What do you think you're finding to be? Fuck off. His hypothesis is he's Wi-Fi is fucking him up. Oh, we're doing a hypothesis and thesis.

I get it. Yeah. Yeah. The Western world and the, you know, a lot of the lights in this studio and the atmosphere is fucked up my cheese. Yeah, my cheese bad. So will Master Gu fix my chin.

Reset it. How do you measure your chi to see if it hasn't improved? Blood pressure is a good way to start. Yeah. And really, it doesn't even have to be China. It just to be anywhere that Mark isn't. Yeah, that's probably helpful. Can I go with?

No, absolutely not. Like, that would be a good experiment as to get... Maybe you have... That's Yin and Yang. Is that not a Chinese ideal? No. You have Master goo on one shoulder. I'm going to say maybe.

You have Master goo on one shoulder. You have me on the other shoulder, Donnie. Think about it. That is science. Also think about Master goo in his broken English saying, no, Mark. It's interesting. It is interesting. I don't know how you'd say it.

If he comes back a better person, it might be better for everyone. You're right. Correct. All right. It's interesting. Next slide. Next slide. Okay.

Okay. and now I have a beautiful mind. I'm ready to do science. Oh, so this is just... This is just the beginning. This is just getting it. That was just the beginning of Ducon. And what is that guy doing?

Is that a cigarette? I just searched a guy, beautiful men. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. The guy on the top, right? What's he doing? He's a beautiful man as well. Okay.

Just sitting there on the ground. Cool southern Asian, I want to say. South East, maybe. And then, yeah. So that was, so that's really the beginning of the Prezi. That's how it should have started. That's how it did start. Are you saying now you?

You're ready? Now I'm ready. Before we even do, do science, you need to get your... I have to go to China to even start this journey. Have to. Have to. Okay. No questions asked.

Can I ask? What was the 4% that we missed out on? Well, that now, so I have 2% of the 4% here. Next slide. Oh. Okay. Will I... Okay.

Again, I didn't get time to spell check. I will recreate some classic experiments. Yep. Okay. Oh Hell yes Blum Bole Bole Bole Bole And this is all with good she

Yeah this is with good she So they had bad she I'll have good she That was an experiment What wasn't in there What is the experiment I know but I'll see if he could have been in there I'll put myself in a weather balloon

And see if I can survive in a weather balloon And Have the news go crazy What if you die? I love that Well you know what? We could all play what ifs Brennan

Yep Sure can So that That would be my first experiment. And then the next, shot out of a human. Yes. So I really want to do science of aerodynamics.

There's a lot of force. There's a lot of G's physics involved in this. So I'd like to find a circus that will let me do shoot out of a human game. I love this. I love this. And then next, Mark fucked it up. I can't finish. Wait.

You type this. You're not at the end yet. That's the end. This is the end. So that was, I was about to keep adding. That's the very. And then you came over and started writing shit on my whiteboard and saying, time to go, time to go.

Yeah. So now, oh, it zooms in. I had time to make it. You had time to add that. And you finished. Yeah. I had time to do. But what I would like to do, you know, just out of the top of my head,

anything Brian Johnson's done, sign me up, liver transplant, blood infusion, blood transfusion. Will you track your erections? That's the science I don't really care much about. But, you know, we'll see. I haven't looked into that one. and then mostly weather balloons and cannons and then human genome sequencing. So today, I thought it was good.

Today we just need to get your chi fixed. So, yeah, I had to try it before I do anything. Put your hands down. In. Can you be a pioneer of science if you're just doing everything that other people are doing? I don't know. I don't even know how to ask. That's not even a question.

That was a pretty straightforward question that you're seeking to become a pioneer of science. I'm already a pioneer. You're doing what Brian. You said you want to do what Brian Johnson does. You want to do a little boy dear. I'm going to do tests that he hasn't even thought of. I'm going to do human testing. On yourself?

Yes, on myself. Okay. So you need to be a scientist in order to form a circus stunt. Yeah. No, I'm just going to study the physics of it. That's not even, that's, again, that's a bad question. How long would you need to be in China? Could be a couple weeks.

Probably at least a week. At least two weeks. Two weeks. Get your Chi set. Get my Chi set. straight to the... What if it doesn't take? Well, then we started ground zero.

Yeah, how do we know it works? You're going to go to New York? Yeah, we could start there. Yeah, that's a different science. I don't want to do metal and steel beams, and that's a lot of... So we have your hypnotist on the line. He's been here the whole time. Who's up?

Your hypnotist. Do you want to talk? No, I don't. Why so afraid of him? Get him on. Can he make him a little frog? Can he put you a frog? It's really like...

No, no, Donnie. Donnie, we don't. We don't. We don't. Donnie, we don't. We don't, Donnie. It's not your fault. Come back.

Donnie, we don't have your... We don't have them, Donnie. What happened with this hip... Oh, wait. Something is bad. We got to get these guy's chi fixed. His chi is... Come on back.

He's not here. He's not... We're never reaching out to him. Donnie. I don't know. That's my bad. I want to talk. to Jack McCarthy.

Yes. Yeah. What's your deal? He made him. He scorned. He's going from from Jack McCarthy to master goo. Jack McCarthy fucked up his chi.

His cheese fucked. He's not on Zoom right here? No. He just said that. Donnie, I was fucking with you there. I apologize. There's something with this. I shouldn't have done that.

That was too far. You've proven that. Yeah. Your chi is not good right now. Is it not good or is? Is it not good or is? Is it clogged? Is it not flowing?

My Chi expert. So when do you want to go to China? I'm in. You just got to... The only person you've got to worry about in this room is me. I'm in right. That is right. Forget all of them.

Yeah, I would like to get... I don't know. I got to check my schedule. All right, check your schedule and we'll get... I do have... I do have a full... You know, I got to... But I'll clear some path.

So your mat doesn't help with your Chi... Maybe July 4th week. I'm gone. week. I mean. Do you care about your chee or not? That's a week. I have ceremonies.

Weddings? Yeah. Okay. What about the week before? I can find a week. I can carve out a week. Yeah. I can carve out of...

I think we're surviving barsoes here, so... I can carve out, okay. Yeah, that works for me too. Could you go tomorrow? No, I can't go tomorrow. Okay. Can't. Yeah, you want to do last week of May?

I don't know. I think that could work for me. You can't do mostly sports from China, buddy. I got mostly sports. Don't worry about mostly sports. He was, he's big James Sports. Yeah, I just won the James Award. Will you be able to document it all yourself?

No, I'll bring Miller. Can I bring Miller? Oh, yeah. Of course you can bring Miller. Cool. But now we're up to like the 5,000 number is going to be. I want to bring my guy too. No, I'm in for this.

Okay. Yeah, yeah. Okay. I think you can make some good content. I want to bring my guy. I think it'll be great. If you're making content out of it, in. Yeah, I'll go film the whole thing.

I'll document it and I'll come back to the Prezi video. Because I've been thinking like we haven't done a Donnie does China. Oh yeah, you're right. That would be a big. Real pioneer. First ever in personal history. It's full circle. It's where I started, you know.

Do you want the other Donnie to come with you? I still have my visa. We could. I mean, that would be cool. We could do a whole circle. Do you want to do some like pre- good Chi trials at the circus? Yeah, you do need this

figure out your baseline. Yeah, your baseline Chi? Can we could, now, would you be open if we got someone in here who's a Chi expert to test your shit? Yeah, we could do it. Yeah, that'd be, I'm not here next week we could do it. Where are you going to be? I'm gone next week. Where? China? Not China, but I'm out

next week. Yeah, this is the trip I've had planned for years. No, I love that. Where are you going? There's no snow. Going to France. Oh, fuck yes. Should we give you like a baseline stress test? Yeah, we could do that. No, we need to get a Chi expert in here. Right, like before and after or...

Yeah, I do a Chi expert and a stress test and a... Yeah, maybe get my levels checked. What are you willing to do physically to your body? Anything. Besides, like a... I don't want to cut any organs out, but besides that, I'll do anything. It's reasonable. Anything.

Yeah, or I don't want to do bone fractures. I don't want to do that. No bone fracture. What was the bone resetting? I don't know. I think that's just, like, fancy alignment to get your... Are you a... Hiropractor guy?

Oh yeah, once a week. Steven, see if you can get a Chi expert in here the rest of this week. I'll be out, but let's cheat him up. There has to be one at Chicago, right? Okay. Wyatt's the first three letters. Wyatt has one. I think.

I don't know. I assume that's what he sent us. Oh, yeah. How are French. Oh, yeah. Or French cheese. French cheese. Are they stinky?

Stinky. Yeah. Stinky. Yeah. Sticky. Oh, we got the red light package here, too. Oh, did you actually? Yeah.

So it's whatever you want. Fuck, yeah. That's actually huge. Huge. See, again. It's a good day. Don't worry about Mark. Don't worry about Brandon. Yeah, don't worry about Brandon. I won't. I'm just talking to you.

You got guys in here. Just talking to you. Tell Donnie, they can tell me it doesn't have to be named. No, yeah. Next week, I'm out, but otherwise I knew Chee the week after. Or we'll do Chee this week. When do you leave? I leave on Saturday. That's an awesome trip. I'm stoked, dude. They've been getting nuked with snow.

Who are you going with? My younger brother and my younger brother and my younger sister. Your siblings. You're brothers and your sisters. Yeah, my three brother, or two of my three brothers and my sister. Are you bringing the brother you don't like? I like them all. Okay.

But the one that's not in the group. He was invited. He's not coming. Oh, okay, good. That's actually good vibes. Yeah, it's good vibes. How are the brother's chi? One of them has really good chi.

One of them has Chi, Chi, Chi, Chi like me a little bit. And Rob's, no, he's angry chi. He's higher blood pressure than me. Is the one we know going? Kevin. Yeah. Yeah, Kevin's going. Yeah, he's got good cheese

He's got great cheese He's got great cheat He's the most chi of the family Yeah You keep on bringing up your blood pressure Is that something that's like It's concerning I gotta get a doctor

I still haven't found one I haven't looked But I got to find one Yeah But it's bad Where do you think it's from Stress? I haven't looked

Oh you haven't looked I think it's genetics Honestly I think it's because I'm Cuban Yeah you are Cubans have high blood pressure Didn't know that Yeah Why do you hate Mark so much

He started it He started it He did start it You did start it You started it You started what? You want to turn a new leaf? How'd he start it?

He started the whole wheel thing. This fucking guy lost me money every time. He was trying to help you. I helped you. That's what I thought. You would not have won. Go watch the YAC guests of the year. Go rewatch that.

I don't want to watch that. And you got a thousand dollars for me. I understand. I'm very happy I got a thousand dollars. I don't think it had any to do with him. It's fair. It's Big K. It got me the money.

It's true. It didn't come out of my pocket. Do you think there's any negative repercussions? of getting your chi going. What if you want to give it all up? You leave this, you go, you move to China, you become a monk. If you know what, then that's a beautiful mind.

That's a bet that's to bring it full circle. I would love that for you. If you, if you, if you, whatever your findings are, I'm, if you come back and you're like, hey guys, have been thinking about it, I'm gay now, I'm cool with it. Yeah. He said if, he said if. You do seem to want goo really bad.

In what world? He said if. Gu is a beautiful woman. You goos of my favorite woman. What? A boy. It's a boy named. Eileen goo. Oh, that's the tennis players girl.

I keep thinking of grew. Right? That's Peggy Goo. She's a skier. What's Peggy Goo? Eileen goo. She's a skier, yeah. She's awesome skier.

She just won silver. Oh, they're both good looking. Probably. They're goo goo dolls. It's pretty good. Thanks. All right. Well, Donnie, I'm rooting for you. You could have wrote that one a little bit better.

My bad. I hope you get your chief figured out. I hope you get a go on this trip. And I hope it all works out. That's very nice. I'm excited for this time. And I mean that from the bottom of my heart. I do think we need to do a follow-up Chi appointment to make sure that we can have a baseline.

I think the things that need to happen, baseline chi and, um, get in here. Baseline stress. What the face of fucking shit? What the fuck did you do to Donnie? He's totally different. You poisoned him. What's your problem, man? I didn't do anything to him.

He brought the conversation to me. And you told him to get an appearance fee? Yes. Why? Why would you do that? Because I think he's... He just got a trip to China. He works here.

Oh, good. Then let's call it even. Give him your point, though. Well, you got to get it about. Well, no, you were very upset. I wasn't upset. You were very upset. I wasn't upset.

He said that every time he comes on here, he turns into an idiot, and then he gets a million types being like, you're an idiot. You're an idiot. That is true. So he said he said he should get paid for that. I said I should get paid. You said I should get paid. I never said I need to get paid.

The word turns into... turns into i think you i think you're excitable the phrase turns into or not turns into just is it's like a it shows he's an idiot a superman clark kent thing do you think donnie's an idiot yes i knew that before you're that's that's your guy that's the guy that's your guy who's listening he's my guy unfortunately i surround myself with bad people incorrect if you you're all the people yeah you surrounders you are a bad guy and correct you're one of the worst that's not true if not Compared to you? Yes.

Even compared to you. I said it earlier, but you better hope Lucas makes it back from Hawaii. Because you are the worst if he's not around. I'm fine with that title. He's in Hawaii? That's fucking sick. It's raining. Is it?

Yeah. Awesome. Do you hate Lucas? No, I haven't been indifferent. It's just funny. It's just funny for me. Donnie, on the record, I don't think you're an idiot. Great.

I don't think you're an idiot either. I think you're brave for diving into topics that you don't know anything about. Yes, I think you are curious. Yeah, I am. Curious, intellectual curiosity is probably the greatest thing you can have. I'm a curious mom. Like a kid. Like people like Brandon who are not curious about anything. Call you whiskers.

Their life sucks. Yeah, I agree. Well, no, I mean. That's fine. People are reaching out to you. Are you agree with what? I agree with that. I agree.

That I have, my life sucks. Oh, that I'm curious. He's not curious about anything. You might as well be dead if you're not curious. I just get excitable. Yes. And I think sometimes your mouth moves faster than your brain. Can I throw a little counterpoint?

Yeah. If this was pre-recorded, I think you would come off as a genius all the time. Well, that's not true. You're going to China to fix your cheek, correct? What? There's multiple people talking. You ruined him, Jeff. That was that.

Ruin him. He's upset with you guys. Look at me. You're going to China to fix your cheek, correct? Yes, yes. You don't want Mark to go, correct? No. But what if he went and fixed?

his chi and now he's somebody you like and i think jack you should come with us as well i'd be happy of us okay let's go to china the three of us should take china we should we should take china i wouldn't mind fixing nicky smokes is chee oh now we're talking like a lot don't worry about the money the money's fine c's got to get a re-i think he needs to go alone i'll go with brandon i mean i'll go if i will you got it uh-huh i'll go with dark mark you're going to China buddy I love it dude I'm getting ready to learn China I'm so excited I'm my visa still and uh from going to China I yeah my Chinese visa I have a 10 year visa all right all right and they're gonna be able to go yeah we'll get him a visa we might have to fight of Hong Kong

first but I know a guy there all right perfect fuck you jack yeah jack you ruined our boy yeah I don't know I'm not dumb I don't mean you're not dumb not dumb I don't think I found out I have adult dyslexia which I didn't know I ever had so So that's just dyslexia. You have old acquaintances reaching out to you about... I do some old acquaintances reaching out, which is unfortunate. What are they saying? In due time, in due time.

But everybody's dumb when they start something new. Yeah. You haven't really podcast. You haven't really been on live air before. I'm not a live guy. I'm not a live guy. I was happy in my kitchen. I was doing my own science for years.

Yeah. And I was just having fun in there doing science, doing food science. So you regret this? No, I don't regret it. It's a new chapter of my life. what have been what's been the biggest negative well i don't know that's exactly not i'm not sure you got a thousand dollars look i'm not complaining i've never complained all right okay okay sorry i'm happy i don't want it to seem like i'm ungrateful i'm not ingratful i'm not ingrateful

at all i'm very grateful i do not think you're ungrateful at all i'm very grateful for the i genuinely love you and i love you all we all love you no brandon doesn't love you i do Brandon and I have our own relationship. We have our own relationship. And it's good, is it not? It's good. KB and I got grilled cheese together in New York. I brought you cheese carts.

Do you remember this? There was a very interesting launch we had. Was this early on? Very early on you. Oh, you were very, you brought me to a grilled cheese restaurant. Inquisitive about your future. Yes, and you gave me. And by the way, your future, what did I tell you?

I would say, Donnie, like, there was a time. Would you not agree at this company? There's a time where you're maybe like trying to figure it out. You have figured it out. Yeah, there's a long time. You're crushing it. There's a time. I had no idea.

I was lost. And you were crushing it now. Well, thanks. I appreciate that. It means a lot, actually. And Mark, maybe we can fix this. Maybe we can, maybe we can cross it. Maybe we can build a...

Well, said, Donnie. Well, said. I agree. I agree. Nice, man. I hope that makes you happy. Hope you feel big. Hope you feel big.

Hope you feel big, buddy. What if this... Buddy... What if this... Chee master comes in this week and's like, Mark's Chi is perfect. He wouldn't. He would never say that.

He never would. All right. No chance. Someone that that's that that I'm fucking done. All right, let's spin the wheel. See you don't have many people here. Oh, you're inviting me to just see chill. What were you doing?

Working on stickers or something? Oh, Mark. Yeah, you didn't seem stressed. No, no stickers. It's just going through clericry work. Clerical work. Clergy. You know what I meant.

You know what I meant. What kind of clerical work do you have? fucking barstool sports. Clerical shit. The chef of barstool sports is like up to his eyeballs and paperwork. What's how's your boss? We're gone for like a week. And now you have a bunch of files in your inbox?

Yeah, dude. It's, you know, middle of the week is. What were you doing? Exactly. Slowly shredding KB's birth certificate. I was now planning out, planning out shoots. know clerical work. Were you thinking of food?

I was looking at recipes to make and Dave is doing a challenge with me tomorrow. White Sox Dave? Yes. The new series of, we're doing the cooking competition. New series they pick their dish, their best dish, and it's me versus them. We filmed a couple already. But Dave is. So Dave has beaten you before on the yak?

Dave beat me at the yes. He beat me at the banana bread. So this is... That's the last time you made it? I haven't made it since, yeah. No, Donnie, Dave as well. Yeah. Do you know what he's challenging you with?

No, that's the thing. It's a mystery. I find out the second we start cooking. Okay. Can anyone challenge you? Yeah, if anyone thinks they can cook, like, as a good... Like anyone? I know you can't cook your shit.

You've already... I won your fucking competition, dude. You're a picky eater. I want your competition. You already said, I actually invited you on what's for lunch in your early days when you were... If you were a fucking nobody. My early day. You said no.

I plucked you from obscurity. You turned it down multiple times. I did not turn it down. I did the exact opposite. I told you I wanted to do it. You said, I don't like to eat anything. And you called me for Coach-o. You said, I'm a picky eater.

You said, I wouldn't be a good guess because I don't know. I like, I eat like a small girl is what you said. Is that what you said? I may have said small girl. It does sound like something I would say. I won the cooking competition. You did, yeah. Yeah.

You went against, I don't know who at that point. Yeah. That's like the being a tallest midget. Sorry, all right. Oh, man. Can you not say that? Why'd you say sorry? Well, because he's our resident.

Yeah, but you said it and said sorry immediately, so I think you knew. Well, I thought about the term. You had that locked and loaded. That was all at one breath. You could have had another. That's like being the tallest dwarf. Right, but like, can you switch up the metaphor to something else?

It doesn't have to be tall. Smartest. Well, I can use that. That's, and my little rat fuckers weren't watching. Smartest. Yeah, well, I mean, okay. What's another dumb profession?

Straightest. Straightest. Straightest. You're going to say like, can't say that. Ballerina or something. Skip the middleman. I mean, that's the cue. That's the Q and LGBTQ.

Is that not the Q? Or is it questionable? It's questionable. It's questionable. It's questioning. It's questioning. What's the L? Lesbian.

B. Gay. B. Oh. I don't know. Actually, back at it. Back at it. Back to my old ways. Fuck.

Husband. Back at it. We don't have to play this game. We don't have to play categories or whatever with this. Guess of the year. Oh, my God. Whoops.

Whoops. You can say it. It's the Q. Yeah, we'll go questionable. It's whatever. It's queer, yeah. It's queer. It's on TV.

Queer art for the straight guy. You're right. Good show. I haven't seen it, but I presumably good. It's good. It's good. It's how I learned the French tuck. What's that where you put your...

No, it's... You tucking out. Oh, my God. What did you think it was? What you think it was, Donnie? With your dick between your legs. French, Todd. Is that where you guys are doing in France?

That's your first duck. That's what you and the end of the last time. Wolf fame. Did anything get back to Wolf about you talking about? Oh, yeah. Yeah, his mom was sending it around all her friends. She was, she liked that? She always wanted a gay son.

She wanted, like, she wanted a gay son. Why? She just likes the idea of having a, uh, so she was loving it. And, uh, yeah, Jack liked it. Look, the end of the day, phenomenal. Like I said the first time, phenomenal interior designer. If he was a chick, would he be your ideal partner? I mean, I don't know how to answer that question.

I love him. Like, that's like saying would I marry my brother. I don't know if my brother was a girl. Sister. A sister. Right, so no. Right. But he's not your actual brother.

Yeah, he is. He's closer than some of my brothers are to me. So I'm not going to. Now, you're not going to try to trick me to being gay on camera. I'm not trying to trick you. I said if he was a girl. look he's my best friend and yeah he did take some backlash and I

said I apologize I apologize you actually were the right you said what does he do you knew exactly what you're doing what I didn't he knew his professional I was curious what he did for a living and you know that most men that do interior design are of the

it's got to be in the 90s and stop that what you what that's just it's got to be in the 90 percentile right probably yeah yeah and he's one of the He's a straight engineer designer, and he's fantastic at it. He does great work.

What's his, like, best room? Um, I don't know. I don't know the details. You lived with him. What room looked the best? His, his. Nice, dude. Nice, man.

The one, nice, dude. What? You don't see your room in its bedrooms? You don't look in. You're trying to railroad me. No, I'm not. Yeah, you are. I'm trying to learn about you and your friend.

You know him. You've met him. You've hung out with him. You've known him just as long as me. I've known him for less than you. You've known him from New York to here. You've known it for longer than two years. I've never three years.

No. Yes. You filmed the sketch in our apartment. Long piss. Remember long piss? This was funny. Long piss was great. Some of your best work.

Long piss was good. I love having you around, chef. Yeah. You know. Look, I'm in a good mood. I'm back from France. It's so you can't get me riled up. It looks like last night you were red light maxing? That was this morning.

I was still jet lag, so I got the new technology out, new science out. Every bit of you was red face routeed in light. Yeah, yeah, there you go. Wow. And how did you feel afterwards? Recharged. Yeah. Well, tired, because I got about four in the morning.

So by eight I was already like ready for a nap. But that helped. It might have made me tired. I don't know. It's doing something. It's for sure doing something. It's good. It's good.

We got to get us shooting on the next episode. Yeah, we do. Doing the most? Yeah. You know the topic yet? Yeah, I don't want to say it just yet. That's what he said. Well, what's a team effort?

It's a team show. Something you would know little about. Yeah. Not on a basketball. What are you got to say? No, nothing. I would love for you to review. Titus's book.

That would be good. I would read it. What is it? A biography? Yeah, a memoir, I guess. You wrote a memoir? Is a memoir just a period of your life? I thought you had to be like 80 for that.

Yeah. Or like hyper successful. Not that you're not. Like a billionaire. A mogul, a titan. You wrote it in college? I mean, anybody could write. You wrote it in college, though, right?

Yeah, yeah, I was right out of college, yeah. Okay. Don't put me in coach. That's how I felt most of my hockey. your career. Well, yeah, we might find some common ground. You're a bench guy too?

What's up? Were you a bench guy? Yeah. See? All right. We're finding common ground. Could you have been a great? Could you have any of you to be great?

Oh, yeah. Yep, same. Yeah, if I just would have got the right opportunity. Sure. I would have fucking dominated probably. Yeah. I don't know if he's fucking, you could have been an all-star and I would,

I'm sorry, I don't know. No, no. I'm not a basketball fan. Oh, yeah. It's about, can I see the title again? That's why he got the name Club Trillion. Mm-hmm. Really?

Yeah. That was more of a nightclub-esque side of you. Don't put me in code. It's a wordy title. Yeah. I will read it, Titus. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and read your book. Good reviews.

If you read mine, we'll do a book swap. Mine's mostly pictures. Yeah, I'll read it then. You guys should do a book swap. You know, Titus was drafted to the Globetrotters, though. What were you, actually? Yeah. I grew up on that shit, dude.

That in the circus. You're not so, yeah. What? That's not so much. I used to see them every year when they'd come to the Target Center in Minneapolis. They drafted Sun Ming Ming as well.

And I loved it because you'd go and you'd get the laser, you'd get the fucking the sword. Yep. It extends the it's like a big light baton. That's the only reason I went. That was my idea. Mark, don't fucking play around like that, but it's

he knows you didn't have the light baton. That's cool that that's cool that you got drafted to that. It's cool that. What did it pan out or what? I bet you were benched for that on that team as well. What book is that? What book is that? Oh, it's a blood bath. Oh, it kind of is.

That's cool if it's for real. It's serious. I mean, I don't know how cool. It's like being on the Savannah bananas. Oh, yeah, because you seem pretty excited. I actually, well, you unlock the childhood memory. I forgot about the globe troders. That's what I did it for.

I did like, yeah, they do that. You pull the guy's pants down. It was probably your job. Yeah. We went that in practice. Yeah. I wish it was here. Yeah.

ass, practicing, pulling pants down. Oh, that's, that is fun. You gotta save the other guy's hands? No, Globetrotting. Yeah, you almost legally changed your name to Frankie. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. What? Yeah, Dave's guy.

To be Dave's guy was like, he's like, you know, if you're serious about this, like you legal have to change your name to Frankie. I was like, well, fucking no one calls me about my legal name anyway. What difference does it make? So I went to court and I was legally going to change my name to Frankie, Donnie, Enriquez did all the paperwork. Call my parents told them. My mom was like, why? Why?

Like, so heartbroken. My dad was like, I get it. Like, yes, you got to do what you got to do. Like, whatever. And then it was before Thanksgiving. I remember this because if I didn't catch Dave in passing, I would have changed my name. I had the court date the next day. And then we had Thanksgiving break.

And Dave was leaving the office. It was like, oh, by the way, like, I'm changing my name to Frankie tomorrow. Like, I got all the paperwork. And I have the court date. He goes, no, don't actually do that. Thank God. I thank God I called him because I would have just gone the court and changed my name and I would have just Your mom. My mom would have been, yeah.

It's my poor Andrew. It would have been brutal. He's Frankie Dawn. Frankie Donnie. For a job I didn't even have like probably two weeks later is when Austin, like he got Austin and someone else. I would have had Frankie Donnie for no reason. Can you change it back?

Oh, here's the clip. Yeah, you can, but it's a lot of people work. I might actually save your life right now. I literally know where I can. Let's hope to God this is the team. No fault. Is you move the next year closer? I hope that really works.

Here we go. How do I sound? Oh my God, I'm nervous. Everybody hold your breath. I hope I saved Hottie. Oh. Can you hear me? And then Alex Rood.

Yes! Riley, thank you so long. Oh, my God. That is so good. What a story. You get to say that Liley called you Hottie and saved the day. That was so lucky because I have that for the most random reason. Damn.

Wow. Yeah. No, that was, that was cool. What did you do afterwards? Sweat. No, after the podcast. Oh, after the podcast, I flew right back to from LAX to New York, still not knowing if the audio was like cracked or not. I had all the SD cards, like, I held on to them.

I was like, I didn't even dump the footage. It was like however long that flight is five hours of just pure anxiety. I couldn't watch anything. Yeah, that was. Did you try to DM Miley Cyrus? I did DM right afterwards. Did you actually? Yeah.

What did you sign out? I said that had such a great time. Like, thanks so much for, like, saving the day. Because someone was like, you look like her ex-boyfriend. I was like, dude, maybe I have a chance. Like, maybe. Delusional and fuck. Maybe I can find the DM.

I'm sure I still have it. But yeah, I DM there, of course. You'd have to. I had to. How soon after? Probably like the next day. As she's doing the interview with Alex. It's like, boop, boop, poop.

Yeah. No, I deleted it I was probably too embarrassed But yeah, I deleted I yeah, you got the tongue action and everything Oh, that's awesome I know, she was freshly signal I think she just broken up with

Oh, she just looked you up and down too, Donnie I know, dude She was giving me signs That was you that she was looking at She had no one else there, Mark Nobody else Three of us I just notice you're not in the camera shot

Well, because I was behind it And if you notice I was wearing all black That's what you do I couldn't notice because you're not in the shot Yeah, I can see my ass in the beginning. Look at me, I'm wearing a nice tight-fitting clothes right here. Nice and tight-fitting.

You do. Yeah. Why tight-fitting? That's me. Well, that's just how I was back then. Okay. Anyone else is open to throw their hand in the ring if they have something they want to make. Titus? I know you don't fucking mean that, and I know you can't cook. Again, as a reminder, I won your competition.

You beat... I was champion of the entire office. Who'd you beat? You beat like a muscle taco at first time. Well, I won the competition. Okay, so there you go. That's the level to come. A muscle taco won in that bracket. I don't know what yours.

Well, you know what? Congratulations. You won. If you could go back in time, would you have not deemed him the champion? Can you set your bias aside if the dish is delicious? No, I'm a food forward. I'm a food first guy.

Okay. I'm very, you know, it's not about what's who. That's just speak to how good of a cook I am. Is that you saw his mind? Well, you didn't make shit. I think Brandon made that.

I'm going to see what the final dish is because there's no fucking. chance it was anything good. I think it was more of like who's the worst. Yeah. It's the opposite of the first analogy I made. Who's the best worst? So the shortest dwarf? Yes. That's like, yeah. Well, you get the point. Yeah, we do. Okay, you beat Hank and Max.

Yeah. Whoopty-do. What was the dish? Add, hold on, you don't have YouTube premium. I won, and then you never invited me back after that. Well. You said I was bad for the league. We'll do turning into champions, man. You can come back. Yeah. Yeah.

It's because Hank and Max put a raw egg on their plate. That's true. They did. Yep. They made a raw egg stir fry. You guys made spaghetti. Yeah. Pretty sure it was from a can. So, yeah.

Yeah, again, you won because somebody else put raw food on the plate. But you won. It's like playing against the kew at a broken leg. There is. You beat him. You won the race, but the other guy was. I've never done it. than this.

Give me that. Or there's another analogy? It's like doing a long jump with a short pull. Yeah. All right. That is the yak. See you guys. It would be more impressive.

Then we get Chiftani in here. I want to hear, why is he mad at you right now? I'm wearing his jersey from high school. Game war. His literal game war in Jersey. This is the, this is the jersey he wore. Wait, it's actually his jersey that he wore on the JV team for four years. And how did you get that?

How did you get that? It was on eBay. And then I did a lot of, a lot of cross-referencing, a lot of calling people in Adina to confirm it was actually his. The years add up. And then I was like, once I had what I needed, I was like, this is his, this is literally his jersey. And understandable, like, mistake of the name.

Right. He's Andrew Enriquez. Right. That's Andrew Gutierrez. And there is no Andrew Gutierrez. That's right, yeah. And then, like, there was something that trip me up about. He went to Vermont hockey program after high school.

So I called around asking some people And they're like, yeah, he did one year at Vermont He played club hockey before transfer into Wisconsin Doesn't talk about it a lot, but it happened It's his jersey. And he's spiraling because he knows it's his jersey And he doesn't like to get God. So that means his parents had to have gotten rid of it?

I have no idea what happened. I don't know how I got my hair. Yeah, how are you getting rid of that if it's yours? Called his parents. His parents apparently have the jersey What they say is the jersey from the senior year. Right. But then Donnie let it slip that when he plays.

played there, he had a bunch of jerseys. Right. He just had one jersey. I have, I have multiple sources within the school that are like, that's, that's his jersey. Donnie! Where is he? How does he find it? He was telling me how he was texting you, accusing you of leaking his number. I had nothing to do

with that. I didn't know, I didn't know that that was even happening. He was so mad at you. Yeah, he's still, he was, he was yelling at me for that today, and I was confused. I didn't know what he was talking about. So this, this is gone like off of camera. anger. I think so, yeah.

I think it has. And I actually do feel bad. His number was leaked? Yeah. Where was it leaked? Somebody spammed his number. In the, in the Doug Doug chat or something? Yeah, yeah.

Oh. I don't want to do this if you're not there. You don't have the only guy I trust. What? Who is that? Brandon's the only guy he trusts. Johnny almost tripped on a bunch of wires. All right, so what?

Why are you mad at Titus? Not mad. This is a big fan of yours. I don't want to look directly at this guy. I don't want to sit there. I'm fine here. I'll look at you. Where do you want to sit?

I don't know. Minnesota state hockey tournament. You don't give a shit. I thought I'd support the boys. He doesn't care. You think he's doing that out of gesture? He spent a lot of money for that. Do I have to answer that question?

Doing that in jest. Do you know Andrew Gutierrez? Yeah, it's not a real person. I know Eric Gutierrez. I went to college with Eric. No, but what about high school? Were you the only Andrew on your team? We don't have to go.

we don't have to, yeah, I was. There's no Goodyearys. Did you spend a year in Vermont? I did, yeah. Why do you guys? Why were you working? Again, what are we doing research for? Is your game worn jersey?

That's not my jersey. It is. Why? Because anyone can write a description like that. Anyone can make that up. And that's why I made calls. But when was it? Hold on.

When was it listed? I don't know. I didn't buy it. No, no. When was that listed on eBay? I don't know when it was listed. I know. For a fact, because it's my

It's my Venmo. It's my Venmo picture. I'm wearing it. Also, you just recently, we had this conversation about you in the hockey. Do you know this? Can we pull up Chef Donnie's Venmo? Don't, yeah, pull it up. Wait, they could also request. Are you, don't pull it up. You should ignore the request. Yeah, you request it. We do it. Are your Venmo's open, though? Like, for people to send you money? Are they open?

Yeah, buy the jersey back. How does that work? Like, are they open? Yeah, I'm sure. Do you have to say yes, they're open? Okay, there you go. You want to get paid? Yeah, there's just some weird guys out there that'll just pay you. Yeah. I'll sell the...

What? I'll sell the jersey back to you guys. I don't know. Weird guys. You get paid by weird guys? I know, but they're people offered. Would you like to buy the jersey back from that? I'll sell it to.

It's not mine. I have one. I have the exact same jersey. Sitting in storage. What number were you? That's obviously the same number. You guys know this. You guys are trying to run circles around.

You can't. We're not running circles. We're just getting to the bottom of it. You're zigzagging. You're doing something. Did you are six-ags? Doesn't matter. So you're actually mad at him?

Yeah, for multiple reasons. What other reasons? Because he put my number out on the internet. Oh, that was fucked up, dude. That's fucked up. I don't even have your number. Why do you think it was him? Because every number that texted me said, Titus told me to text you.

That's what they're saying. They started group chat. Some dude sent me a picture of his asshole. And Donnie and Donnie and Don't... And he rubbed it and then he piled on. And he kept texting me that night as I'm getting bombarded. Just to rub dirt in my... wound. Shut up, Titus. You know you... I've never

sent you a text in my life, Donnie. Mark. Do you have his number? Wait, you have my number. You can prove this. I blocked it now, yeah. Was it somebody... No, you have my number when I called you. Mark, I'll read it out loud. I'll read it out loud. Was it somebody pretending to be Mark? Mark, this is your number, dude. It's not my number. Was it somebody pretending to be him?

In fact, you could say the number on air because I know it's not my number. Read the text that said it was Mark. He texted me on Presiday. I know it was you. So yeah, careful. You don't want me to read this number, do you? I did not text I know for a fact I didn't start reading the number 5-5-1 that's not as air

fuck don't do it no no no no 9 9 stop stop you gotta keep going it's not 9

you haven't got one single one of his numbers what did the text say who the fuck is this I'm calling this number were you texting him back like it was Mark oh you did a fake nice

what's 5-5-1 no you're yeah nice I love that everything that in your life. You're going to blame me for. Oldest trick in the book. He's going after you. What's 5-5-1 area code?

Oh, that looks exactly. Really good picture. This is the college cook your thing. You did it. Yeah, it's a business I started. That was the business you started, Mattis. Small business. Yeah. I read about that. I read about that in the diner profile.

Yeah, that is Donnie. Yeah, they wrote an article while me in the newspaper. Yeah, I read the whole thing. I read the whole thing. Was it well written? Yeah, it was. Yeah, I didn't write it. Quotes from your parents.

But I didn't. I didn't. I mean, you said you trusted me. Why are you? I don't know. I just, I only do a show with him for no. How do you settle this? So I was texting this guy all night.

It wasn't in Titus. Wait, why were you texting back? Because I said, hey, dumb ass, I know it was you. I just don't know who you are. What a, what? And then he called me gay chef. I was like, this is actually mean. I thought, you know, I didn't think Titus would take it outside of the office.

And he was texting me nasty shit. And now it wasn't you. So I. I still might have been you on a fake app, but what were the texts? What was the nasty shit? Let me see it. I can't read it. Let me read them. Let me read them. I'll read them. The new fucking software updates sucks, dude.

Yeah. God, you can't search anything anymore. It's a nice watch. Thank you. Relax, man. I'm looking for it. I got to scroll. Anyway, what's new? Donnie, does it bother you that people in your life are colluding with Titus about the jersey? Like, he's in contact with people like that.

It's Ebo and it's your own, it's your crew. It's your mostly crew. So they're all bad guys. I can almost guarantee you nobody else. Yeah, they had nothing to do with this. I don't believe that for a second. They're not capable of this. I don't believe that for.

I don't want to say the names. I just don't want to say them on air. I'll tell you off air if you want. If you could text him. Yeah, okay. This is what Titus was texting me. But it wasn't Titus. Right.

I know that now, but I don't know. I still think it might have been him because he texted me. on Prezzi Day. Okay. And you responded, yo, is this actually Donnie? I'm dying.

L.M.A.O. That sounds like Tyndt is. Why would he say that one was actually don't? That one was me. He would know if it's you, right? Yeah. Yeah, then he just started

calling me retarded. Sounds like a fan. I might be Titus. Do you want the jersey back? No, because I don't want that one. It's been molested now, and it's not mine. This is probably.

You can use that word for anything. It's true. You're 100% certain this is not yours. Yeah. Yeah. I just text to my parents. They said that it's in storage. And I have a picture of me wearing that in high school or in college.

But are you sure that the one in storage is the one that you... I had that jersey on in college. How would you have gotten it from me? That's a question. But I'm saying the jersey that you had in college was not the game worn jersey. I'm saying this was actually the... They're so fucking thick. Do you know?

not understand this. It's not multiple jerseys. It's one jersey. I'm saying the one they gave to you was not this game worn jersey. Yes, it is. That was a ceremonial one. Oh, that's it. How many jerseys? I can't even want this. Two. A home and away. Two jerseys. I have both of them. We're going to have to see both of them. But Donnie, like, that, that description's so accurate to you. But that could have been someone watched. I honestly, that just. Yeah, and saw that Donnie talking about it. Which is why I also got my name wrong. I talked the trick about it. I talked the trick about it. it. Who's the last name wrong? Who's trick?

The equipment guy, the dinah. Is that the guy's name? Talk to trick? It's not trick. But trick is another trick is an old coach. He was our trick lost his mind. Yeah. Oh, so you talked to a guy who lost his time?

I didn't talk to the guy who was selling. Longman dead. The guy who was selling it said is. He's dead? You don't, yeah. When did you talk to trick? I talked to Steve and Cheetah. Trix.

You talked to Steve Cheetah? Now that's the equipment. Oh, Steve Cheetah? I talked to Steve Cheetah. Mark, you talked to Steve Cheetah. I didn't want to do this on air, Donnie. but I stalked at Steve Cheetah. Wait, Steve Cheetah is your equipment?

Can we call up Steve Cheetah? No, we're not calling Cheetah. Why? He's a busy guy. He's taping ankles. We got a game in the night. We got a big game than I. Yeah, Cheetah's swamped him on game.

The eBay seller. I want to get Cheetah on so bad. Made ankle tape. Yeah. He can multitask. He's Jersey. That's Steve Cheetah. How long has he been around?

Steve's been there forever. I don't know how long is he? How'd you get Cheetah? You got Steve Cheat on the line? So what happened? I remember. reached out to the guy who was selling it, the guy who posted on eBay. I was like, how do you have this jersey? Tell me about, like, I want to confirm this is what you said it

is. He told me that his uncle was close with Trick. I don't know who Trick is. He was just like my uncle was close with Trick. Trick was, they were doing like a yard sale, I guess. They were getting rid of all the old shit. And they had this jersey was in the 2015 team. So they got it was in the bin with the 2015 team. They got a mix up. Paperwork. And so he's like, they were giving rid of jerseys. My uncle grabbed one. I have it. And I'm looking to make some money off of it. That's basically the story. So then I called Steve Cheetah to confirm, and I was like, I was like, yeah, I would have never saw that right. And I said, Steve, is it, like, is this something that happened? He's like, yeah, we did that a few years back. He's not answering

your fucking call. Steve's not doing that shit. Okay. All right. There's no waste. You have Steve Cheetah's number. Well, how do you know his name then? If he, because he don't have Steve Cheetah's number. I do. Call him. You don't have Cheetah's. There's no chance you have Cheetah's number. I don't know if I. He's probably tape an ankle. You don't. He's, he's. He works in the cages, too. He doesn't have reception where he lives. I bet he has a phone, though. Maybe.

But still zero percent chance. It's a nice jersey, yeah, but we're going to... It sounds like he's putting together a pretty good case. I think you might have produced a... I mean, you clearly just looked up, but you use the internet. Where's your... What? Where's your parents' storage unit?

I'm not telling you that. He's not... I'm not going to go, but maybe they could go prove. They don't have access to it. What? Right now. Why? That's what I'm saying.

They can't get there. It's in a different state. They got to cross state line. Did it get storage ward? They didn't get, no. Yep. I would have seen that. Well, it didn't have to be on storage wars.

I would have seen that. They just did it. They just put it in storage. It's safe. All right. You at least pay for it. Yeah, but it's right there. I'm looking at it.

Guys, we're going to do a merry-go-round all day here or what? Maybe. I got to talk to Cheetah. Yeah. He doesn't have his number. I know for a fact you don't cheat his number. Well, I didn't save it, so I don't... Yeah, right.

Yeah. Why would he save Cheetah's number? I didn't save it, so I don't know. Cheetah's a number and you save. You save Cheetah's number. I'm with Donnie on that. You gotta save Cheetah's one, you gotta save. Do you have Cheetah's number?

Probably. I don't think I... I'm not calling him on Game Day. I didn't save it. It's like seven hours away. God damn. And now everyone's requesting me money. No one's paying.

We got to get Cheetah. I got to talk. My inbox is going to be flooded, dude. I already have no space in my Gmail. This is fucked. What do you mean? Oh, because you're... You're out of it.

I would turn off the Venmo notifications now, probably. Why don't you just clear up some storage in your Gmail? Brother, I've tried. I don't have the number. Exactly. Okay, I win. I call them. You have one right now.

Case and point. Until we get cheetah. Case and point. Yeah, no, it's an open... It's open case until we get... Do you think we can get cheetah without Johnny? I just made it. The tax asking if we can track down Cheetah.

Did Cheetah he would tape you? I talked to him, Donnie. I just didn't save his number. I don't know which one was his. How long have you had that jersey? I have your jersey. Two weeks. Do you?

I'm getting one right now. Nice. You got him, dude. Ohio State or his high school? Donnie, I really thought you'd take this better. I thought we would come together over this. I thought you'd be like, Yeah, I thought you'd be like that's a cool.

Like, Brandon, you've worn my jersey on the show. And when you did, I was like, that's really cool. An homage. Honor. I thought that was awesome. And it's a huge weekend for a dinah hockey. They're going for state tonight with the JV. Is this state champs?

It's the JV. Is the JV. Play, and state two? Quarterfinals. J.V. doesn't go to state. No one cares about them. Wait, is that a JV. jersey or? That's probably what it was.

This is probably your JV. jersey from. Is this your senior junior varsity jersey or? They're worse. Is this your JV jersey? Oh, because they're. They trust me. They don't like keep those. They don't, they got to...

So this is your varsity jersey. That's why it's so clean. It's a varsity hockey jersey, yes. You guys are just making the same jokes you made on mostly sports. I know. You need your airwaves. You need your airwaves. A lot of us aren't on mostly sports.

There's no chance. So the one thing that keeps me from thinking this is Donnie's is that there is a puck mark mark. Yeah. You take shots in warm-ups. Yeah. Fucking stopped every single one. In warm-ups? Someone's got to do it.

That's true But would you be upset if that was yours Or is there no chance I mean there's a chance of anything So you know How can you say with absolute certainty Anything happens Is there nothing that gives you a warm feeling

Looking over there and seeing that Adina jersey It fills me Go yellow jackets Yeah Yeah you know it's the hornets Make give Brandon like how If Brandon if somebody was wearing If Brandon was wearing it I wouldn't mind

Yeah No, but like, who would be like a worst person that could wear that? The devil himself. Okay. I try and I try and I try, Donnie. We just can't. Now this fake Titus is texting me again. I got to re-block you.

Didn't he just have his phone out? I know. So clearly it's not you. But there's an app you can use to switch your number, but I don't know if you know that kind of deck. Right, but the point is he just had his phone out. I understand. It might be him. You can schedule shit.

You've been sending scheduled text Scheduling out texts Donnie do you have two presents A chef at 2.34? I have presentations that I I wasn't meant to present so they're presentations but they're not It was made specifically for Mincy and Ethan to present them

We can go through them Well they'll be here right They're here. Yeah they should present them Pretty good What do I'm doing tomorrow? What day is it? Are you going to be in the mud tomorrow?

Why is there We're asking about mud. Why is this? Well, you said, how old is it? Yeah, why? What's wrong with that? I'm going to make an age list for the mini golf tournament. Legally 20.

Well, legally 29, first of all, is a crazy answer. And then not right now, Tate. I'm covered in mud. Right. Again, I've had more questions about the goddamn mud than anything else. Well, it's just an interesting phrase to say at 9 o'clock in the morning. If you're like, hey, where are you? And you're like, I'm covered in mud.

Okay. I was on my morning walk and there's a fun lumber yard. There's pieces of wood that are cut and sometimes I like to climb around in them. I slipped, fell on mud. I would be crazy. Where was the lumber yard? It's over on, you keep going on West or on Westown's gate, you probably know

exactly the area. I do know there. My kids, when I walk them by in the wagon, think it's pretty sick. And you have to climb over the lumber to work? There's, there's fucking, there's wood you can climb around. Is it a gated lumber yard? It's like a playground? So you were like, climb the gate? Yeah, what do you like? Donnie, you were

playing in a lumberyard? What's wrong with that? That's a good way to start the day, in my opinion? By yourself? I agree. Yeah. Were you like giggling and No, I wasn't giggling, but I was having a good time. I did like Chaps' response there. He's spot on. I think he answers like that because he's Cuban and still has some baseball dreams.

True. Yeah, I don't know. I don't see anything wrong with those messages, but apparently. Everyone's out to get you. It's not fair. I already explained the legally 29 thing you guys already heard, and that was a good explanation. You're physically 17, spiritually 65. That's what you said.

say it then it's correct it oh it's fine you ruin it's your bones and blood are 17 your bones are three ages you have biological age you have your legal age and you have your spiritual age so you're biologically what we don't have to talk about what my biological age is doesn't matter but you said 17 what is your biological age I'd have to actually get attested but I don't so I would say around 18 17 spiritual spiritual 65 you were 17 what about the women you sleep I don't think you're anywhere near spiritually a 75 year old yes I am No, you aren't. There's nothing about you.

War tunes. Spiritually? Yeah, he is. You're like a six-year-old. Oh, man. No, he loves like, war. That's a compliment. Do you 75-year-olds play in the mud?

Yes, six-year-old is like, you have a playground. You like adventures. So maybe I reversed it. What are you going to do? Yeah. That's a compliment, by the way. All of us are. Six-year-old is like what, the point is I'm legally 29.

That's all that matters is your paper and pen age. So why didn't you say a police officer pulled you over, would you say? Like, I'm actually 75? No, I don't, I don't fuck around with the law. Authority. Donnie just sent me something. Learn that from the young age. This, Donnie?

That's what you're doing earlier? That's what I was doing in the lumberyard. Burning the tightest jersey. Get them out. All right, Tony, I have your back. Not all flags fly forever. Yeah, that's true. Oh.

Oh, that was a threat. Oh. He's walking out under the tithest banner. He's talking about your gauntlet. There's paperwork that proves. There's no fucking paperwork. What, is it, an official stamp with a baseball card? It got notarized.

No, we didn't. Shut up, Nick. I'm sick of this. Let's see the paperwork. Well, maybe it's right for Mark. Yeah. Yeah. Can we shut the doors and not let them in?

Well, there's a giant wall here that's missing. There's a door for the wall. You can shut him. We can shut them out. Windows, really. We shut them out. They're doors. Ish.

What's the evidence? He was talking to the cellar. He's been... Well, the seller can... The seller's a weirdo problem. He had... The seller seemed convincing. Come on.

Let's fucking... We won a big fucking game last night. Yeah, I know, but let's lock in for this, dude. Let's lock in for this. I got a hat trick in the first period. Yeah, natural hat trick, first period. Three to one. You watch?

You watch? Who did it? Next. Let's lock it. More head. It's going to be tough. Got more head to be tough. What's going to be tough?

uh two when in tonco's first but morehead's more had won last year the defending champion more it's very good yeah they've been here before too yeah they have who's your biggest rival uh edin prairie but they're not in the tourney this year at least when i was playing it could be it's probably different now they're trash EP EP was what why were you wearing mattie's pants what we talk in the video why are you wearing mattie's pants what the fuck we're talking about who's maddie and what are we told what are maddie a girl or a boy what are we talking about 2015 cheer video 2015 cheer video

What the fuck are you talking about? In the 2015 cheer video Why are you wearing Maddie's pants? You're doing yoga and Maddie's pants Is Maddie a girl? Is Maddie a girl or a guy? Maddie's a girl, yeah Maddie's a girl, yeah, Maddie's sister.

So you were doing yoga and Maddie's pants? It's a joke. All right. Why are you wearing the wig? Why do you have this video? Where'd you get the wig? Titus is on you, dude. Titus has been doing so much.

What the fuck, dude? What are we doing? You're doing yoga. Clearly, but why are we watching this? Yeah, I mean, the dumb video we made in high school, what do you want me to say? Everybody's done it. Titus has everything in your life. Yeah, that's terrifying.

What does he do when he leaves his office? You. You. You? All day. See, I can't compete with that. I can't. I got a other show.

I got hobbies. I got hobbies. Got my. Right. I got hobbies. Look, man. You have a child, man. I got to call child protection.

of services now. Spending more time on young, you're watching young boys in high school than you are your own kid. That kid's going to be fucked up. That's pretty good. Did they tell you the news? I don't know, man. I just asked him why he was wearing, why were you wearing Maddie's pants? And he didn't like that.

But we didn't tell him any other news. We waited for you. Yeah, I mean, it's your jersey. Mark, there's no, I like, I love that you still think that. It's nice. It's like believing in Santa Claus. It's not. It's 10,000% your jersey.

The guy got it from the school. He goes through all. He was going frame by frame. He said there was a cut of the jersey that was only used that year. The yoke went down. The fuck yoke went down. And they changed it because they changed it after that year. Look, you might.

Did you buy your jersey? You might think you have my jersey. Yeah, I got it. I got both my jerseys. I was wearing my jersey in college. We saw it on Venmo. So I don't know how you would have my jersey. Oh, that big picture on Vimmo.

Did you leave it at college and end up in? the goodwill? No. Look, I'm going home next week. I'm shooting a video in Minnesota. Hell yeah. Go to my storage unit. Paperwork?

And you're certain. If I can get in. If I can get in. I thought you didn't cross state lines. So I'm crossing state lines. Oh. I don't know if I can get the keys and everything I need to get. There's a,

to be able to get into the storage unit, it might not be possible. Oh, your parents just have the keys? If everything works. If everything lines up correctly, yes. Your parents should just have the keys to the storage unit. Multiple sets of keys. How does that, how should that line up?

You rent a storage unit. You rent a storage unit. You live. your stuff in there, you keep the key. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. I don't know where the key are. What I'm saying is that. Can you put up the messages with the seller?

Yes. The jersey that you have, Donnie, is from one of the first three years you played on JV. The jersey I have is your senior year. This guy's a weirdo. Senior JV. Senior year, JV. Yeah. I was on your side, Johnny, until they said they do let players buy their jersey if they want them.

He might have missed the deadline for that. Yeah. That's where I was like. Oh, no, Donnie. It's definitely something I would miss. Yeah, I mean, that's where I was like, I was on your side. Up until I read that line, I was just like, dude. Oh, boy, but I'm not our guy.

But I have my jersey in college, so that's where I'm, we'll find out next week. That sounds like something I would do. What about this, Donnie? Says. I don't think that's true because, no, Chris Bonvino made the same jerseys for the two years. We didn't change the They got new kits Once I left

But we had the same style They were rocking for the last three years But them give these ones Yeah I mean that's boy I mean come on That's real That's AI slob Max are the chairs out there

AI slob All right AI slob So what percentage do you think That's Mark has your jersey I don't know Higher than I would like to admit Uh huh

Donnie You need to beat Tice this time Getting through the day Yes, he did. Titus and Danny and Spider have done it. A hundred bucks if you get through. We'll give you help. I have the record.

Do you want help? Danny got help. Titus went solo. Stephen, put the D back where it was. It took Titus a minute and 21 seconds. Yeah. No, no, we'll help you. I won't touch you.

You can use help. People can pull you. I know, I know. In the interviews, surprisingly, swimming. He's going to get in. the way, I don't know, I haven't announced, I haven't said it, but I'm percolating on the idea that I told

Donnie this. I think Camp Barstool has to be Donnie versus Titus and terms. Okay. And Donnie then said, well, then we have to do the climbing the wall challenge. All right, then do three pointers. Yeah, can we play one on one?

Yeah, you guys both get to pick one challenge. That's fair. Yeah, that's what it has to be. Yeah, yeah. Sounds like a waste of time. You guys, Captain's choice on a challenge. All right, all right. Okay.

Can we do off-menu challenges? Yeah. Make my own challenge? Yeah. Off-menu. I got something, by the way, for Barstow Camp that I... I don't know if we're legally allowed to do it, but I'm gonna... Yeah.

Do you want to see what I'm... Yeah. Are you going to do... Hold on a DJ. No. What did you say? A jetpack? Oh, the water jet packs?

Oh, I've seen that. I don't know. I don't know if they'll let us, but we should probably... talk to them because this would be the fucking coolest thing ever. I said it to you, T.J. You do extreme sports stuff, Chef. Have you ever, like, spilunked where you're going in

tight spaces? I'm not good with caves, but Okay. I can get through... I used to do this. You used to do this? No, not through D's, but... Not D. All right. Are we ready? You want help? Yeah, we'll give you help. O's and Q's. The key here is go two arms

first. I'll hold the top. You can get help. T.J., you got the timer ready? You can get help with people pulling you through if you need help. I'll grab your feet. Okay. Am I the first one to do this?

No. No. I swear to you, no. You are not. But I think this is insane. When did you start going? He's getting in there easily. Keep your hat on?

And chef, if you actually need us to help, you have to say, help me, help me, help me three times. No, he really did it. Danny went both arms first like you do. Reset, reset, reset, reset, reset, reset. It's cave in your sternament. Isn't it, Chef? Honestly, the D might be shaped better to go...

You have a torso of a hockey backup. I... No, chef, I would do belly towards the curve of the D rather than the straight... Yeah, good call. Both arms through. Yep. Take your hat off. Why do you run a hat?

Yeah, one. Reset the time. Reset the time. Reset, reset, reset, reset. Ready? Yeah. Tell me one. Three, two, one.

Oh, ease. This is easy. With ease. He's got. It's the sternum is the hardest part. Oh, my God. He's got it. He's got it.

Oh. Holy shit. Oh, you see the bottom corner is so sharp. Shout out to us. All of our pregnant hackers out there. It's coming your way. We're on stuck watch. Basically, child.

Child. We're on stuck watch. Are you stuck? He's stuck. He was caught. Is cough losing blood? Oh, no. Oh, no.

You're going to lose your cough. Are you stuck, Tony? Donnie, tilt yourself. Yeah, like that. Tilt yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, whoa.

Oh, whoa. Oh. Oh. Oh, no. Oh, that's going to hurt. Oh, my God. It's going to hurt so bad. Someone get the base off for him.

The thing is the base off. Only you can do this. It weighs like 65 pounds. You got you got 20 seconds, Donnie. It's puncturing your kidney. It might be puncturing your kidney. No, it's very sharp in that one. Very sharp and heavy.

Somebody help him get the base off. Are you stuck in the D? Oh, you're stuck, dude. I can get hanged from the hospital. You have to pick up Hank from the hospital. Wait. You have to go with the thing. He has to hang.

Donnie, get out of the D. You got to stand up straight. Hank's not going to believe you. You got to stand up straight and raise your arms. What is his obligation? Pick up Hank from the hospital. It's wrong with Hank. You got to put it back.

Hold on, hold on. Back to the side. Chef, would it be easier if you quit? You want to go over your head again? We got to stand him up. We need a saw. A saw. We need a song.

We need a song. Chef, what are you doing in the team, man? Get out of that, chef. Time out, time out, time out. Stop the clock, T.J. Stop the clock. Stop the clock. Time out.

Suck in. Suck in, chef. This can't be the best way. Suck in. Hold on. I think it's the other way. Go the other way, chef. Go back on the side.

Am I going to beat the time or not? You're close. Yeah, you're close. Just go. Just take it off. Somebody else. Yep. Yep.

Oh, shit. I gotta go. It's going to go. You got to suck in. You got to suck in. No, no, no. It won't go over my hands. Hold on.

Chef, you're going to have to take your pants off. You gotta stay calm. Stay calm. Everyone's stay calm. Hold on. We got to get the base off. The base has to come off. The base has to come off.

Take the base off. The base is stuck. But push it back in and then pull it out. out. Don't let the weight go on my hips again. Or go back? No, no. Put the piece back on the ground and then try to pick it up off of the... Hold on. But he's in it. Oh, dude, guys, I'm legit. I have to go to hospital now. No, he's saying he's got to go to the hospital and get Hank. Don't, you get this off.

Guys, I hope insurance does these stuck in deeds. Stuck and D. I hope insurance does stuck in D's. It's my shirt. My ribs. I'm not going to this way. Hold on. I actually have to say, hey, I'm not kidding. I've got to calm down. Everyone calm down. Please, everyone calm down. Please, everyone calm down. Hold on. Hold on, hold on. Pause. Who's in charge here? Everyone, time out, time out. Time out. The NBA finals are in full swing and the intensity isn't letting up. Every game delivers high-stakes drama, clutch performances, and unforgettable moments you'll be talking about for years. And with Draft King, sports, an official sports betting partner of the NBA, your winnings get a boost every single day. All finals long. The biggest stars turn it up when the title's on the line,

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Download the Draft King Sportsbook app. Use code Yack to claim your profit boost. That's code Yack to get a boost every day. The NBA finals in partnership with Draft Kings. The Crown is yours. Who? Are you going to... You got me.

No, no, no. But are you going to go... You're going to try again, right? You didn't do it. You never went through. No, no, no. I just beat you. I can't, dude.

That was insane. Chef, that was really close. What if we take it off the base? Don't lie. They won't go through it. But what have we taken off the base first? You've never even been through a D before? Sit down.

Do you think it's your clothes? Yeah, you got loose bit of clothes. It's the gibberish. That was so fucking funny. Thank you, Wyatt. It was hilarious. I was close to panic. Yeah, I felt bad.

No, because you know why? Because Donnie's the one guy that, like, can handle that. But it wasn't budging up or down. There was a point where I couldn't get it back over my ribs and it wasn't going over my hips. And it was heavy. I'll tell you what, the thing is surprisingly heavy. It's bit. surprisingly.

Well, you don't expect it to be a big piece of wood like that to be heavy. That was so good. That's funny are you, Brandon? I mean, look at the picture. Your sentence was, you don't respect a big piece of wood to be heavy. Sometimes it's plywood. Look at the picture. What picture?

It tweeted in full panic mode. It was so good. Oh, man, I loved everything. Was that the only one you got with that? Look at that. That's pure panic. Oh, guys, stop. No, Danny legitimately went through.

Danny went through. Yeah, and he had cancer, so. Not fair. Performance enhancing. True, true, true. I just had more flab. Titus is beefing with Donnie. What? Oh.

They're yelling to each other. They should do a cooking show called beefing. Yeah, they should. Make red meat and fight. What happened? Doug. That escalated. Look at Doug.

That was really. real. Doug got a haircut. Yeah, it looks nice. What happened? Is he being the worst again? Donnie's on one because people wearing shorts and it's raining. Did he go get him? He came into mostly the day and he looked at Titus and said, dude, put on pants, grow up.

You're in shorts, grow up. Yeah. Yeah. You're a grown man. Put some pants up. There you go. Yeah. Thank you. Which would insinuate that. Sneakily agree. Kids should have.

We've had this conversation before. It's tough for adults to look at the dogs. Rohn's on the... Rhone, are you on our side? I wear shorts. What is the argument? I wear shorts. Yeah.

Donnie said he's wearing shorts, so he's a child. Yeah. It's always guys with stick legs. Just in general? It's never a guy with good legs saying that. I know. I'll tell you that much.

That's what I say. And Donnie is obsessed with my legs. If you're by a pool, if you're by a beach, go ahead, golf course, go ahead. Wear shorts. I think the problem... You're in office?

Pants it up. I think my legs make Donnie horny. Because he talks about my own legs. Is he sexually attractive? Sexually. It arouses. A lot of chatter about my long legs, about my legs in general. You did bring up how long your legs were.

And I think that's what it is. I think he gets aroused when he sees me in shorts. And he doesn't like being aroused. Yeah, it makes him uncomfortable. You can't handle arousal. He is saying that all the time. Yeah. All the time.

He's like, how long are you guys taping? And he'd be like, is it about Titus's length of his legs? Right. What? Yeah. I remember every time he fucks up a dish, he's hard. Mm-hmm. Uh-huh.

He does get hard. Thanksgiving when he fucked up the stuff. soup hard hard he gets i i i remember i was talking to hr about it because someone made a complaint that donnie's being he's just hard all the time i was like it's just probably having a rough time in the kitchen if you want your food to be good just don't fucking turn me on it's hard don't if he if it's 94 degrees you're going to wear pants to the office yes the office i'm walking the dog i'm throwing shorts where do you think you'll work yeah that's what i'm really good i mean the pants right now are these yeah i don't even know why i'm wearing pants i never wear pants

Brandon's wearing that. That's where you're... You were trying to impress a man. You look ridiculous. He, no, this shirt looks pretty fucking sweet. That was for Tom. He's throwing a tantrum. He said, I'll be there when I'm there.

Donnie! He's probably hard. Come in! Oh, yeah. He's trying to be all hard now. He's so hard right now. Yeah. Oh, man.

Just practically sprinting over here. I've like... Oh, that was cool. That was cool. That was cool. God damn. I look to strut. Putting the hat on.

We're losing this one. We're fucked. Yeah. I'm coming friends with Donnie like socially. It's been fun hanging out outside. Yeah. Yeah. What do you mean? Hey, what? Where? Uh, we need a belt. We golf together. We went to Vegas together. Donnie and I are he's been acting like that social social friends. We're good friends. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Are you hard right now? My hard? Yeah. No. Okay. Why don't you have to look? It was last time you were. What's the problem? There's no issue. We, you were yelling at the mark. You just howl. Well, this fucking guy in this. him I'm an issue with every time. I try not to, but just every fucking chance he gets. What is it about the shorts? He's an adult. You shouldn't be wearing shorts in the rain. I'm on a side. Oh, in the rain. The rain. The rain is, you should... Okay. Pants, that's more fabric to get wet.

He's not standing out in the rain. I'm saying as an adult, you shouldn't wear shorts. At a certain age, it's enough. But most of us wear shorts every day. Yeah, well, we live in fairyland. I agree with you. I agree with you. I agree with you. It's at a certain age, Stop wearing shorts. And I theorize that you're attracted to my legs because you like to talk about my long legs. You got long-ass legs. Yeah. I'm saying.

And I think what the stems from, because you were you were singling me out as I was walking to the restroom. Jacob and Owen are standing right there in shorts. Yeah. They're happy. You're talking past them to yell at me about wearing shorts. And I realize my legs make you horny. Tom. That's, no. You prefer long legs in a partner.

You also came after me. You came at me. I wasn't going to say shit to you. You yapped me and I said, get out of here, shorts. I didn't say anything. I was walking to the restroom. What did he yap to you? Who knows?

I just don't even hear it anymore. It's just noise. I didn't say anything. And we were in peacetime. Good way. Fucking, the war's over, buddy. Oh, wait. No, the war's over.

The war's over. The war's over. That's what I was looking for. We were in peace time. Is the war over? Or the war's just begun? The cold over. It's not cold anymore.

It's straight up war. It's not cold anymore. It's not cold anymore. I should wear shorts. Hey, you should have a pants on. That's good point. Who made the point? You want to last a day over there, would you?

Where? On the side of the world. Oh. No? No? What side of the world? Perfect. Would you?

The war. I don't know. It depends. In war? No, we didn't say about anything about war. Nothing. No one's talking about war. Seven times.

You guys are confused. This. That was a minute of gibbering. It's been too long. Checkmate. That's it. That's all. I got what do you what you just hate his shorts that much no I just hate him so it's the it's the

it's the person in the shorts yeah well no I if anyone wore shorts I'd say what are you doing pick your life together but other than that pick your life together I hate how much I'm on his side yeah me too oh I'm the you have a child what is your kid what's your kid gonna respect you it's the sopranos the Don never wears shorts yeah okay Phil are you self-conscious about your legs I don't show you my legs right here oh shit no it's his it's his foot size these my feet are small yeah but what do you don't can't grow them like any more unless you do foot Chinese smashing seems like you've looked into that yeah well it's a thing but I thought those only made them smaller no that's Chinese that's Japanese foot binding there's Chinese make them

bigger the Chinese try to stretch from out the Japanese want him smaller what's up Greg what do you do it feels pretty nice see he's got shorts on Greg oh Yeah, Tommy just got you. Yeah. Like, that's a, that's a boy. That's a boy walking by us. That's a. He's not doing any business.

No. Who do you think you are, Titus? Angus Young? I would, uh, I don't know. When I look at other dudes, I don't really think about what they're wearing or how they look. I just kind of, I don't know. Is that something you do? You spend a lot of time, like eyeballing other dudes?

No, I don't spend any more time. We could go up and down and go, he's dressed like shit today, and then I move on my life. What did Greg do today that deserve you? He walked by. He's making an ice cream come with his foot. He was upstairs earlier. He was in that massage chair for so long. Why is his foot like that?

Why is he pointing to? He deserves an ice cream after all the sitting in the gambling cage. What about LeBron James? He worked shorts of work. He's playing a sport. Yeah. He's doing his job. Where do we work?

Where do we work, Donnie? What's the company we work for? What's the company we work for? That's a uniform. What's the company we work for? What's it called? It's a uniform. It's a uniform.

It's a uniform. It's a uniform. Oh, Barstall Sports. Yeah. And Dave tried to change the name, but he couldn't get the website. Yeah. Just a barstool. Barstall sports.

You want to take the sport out of the name. He's right there. Did he try to do that? Yeah. Oh, yeah. No your history, you know. Whew. Anything else?

He's kind of dominating you, Titus. It's a fucking blood test. A little bit. You think so? Yeah, well, Greg didn't help you. Greg is. I disagree. I mean, Nick, the switchup is crazy.

You're the biggest Greg guy I know. Well, yeah, but I loved his defensive like, he's in shorts. Yeah. Greg. Greg. Look at that guy. How do we get back to peace time? Nah.

I don't know. Put a pair of pants on and we'll talk. Yeah. Look at that boy. So you think you want to live in a world where only children aren't wearing pants? Nope. Didn't say that.

Is that? I just got a point. Oh, fuck. Now I'm really entrenched on this side. Is that what you're advocating for? Adults wear pants? He's running on the platform. Pantless children is where you can only be able to see

The crevices and groins of children. Nothing to do with it. She'll eat nothing to do with it. Once they turn 17, I have no interest in seeing them in shorts anymore. They've got a word for that time. You don't want to see man knees. It's not, it's nothing to do with the man or the woman behind the shorts. Wait, well, women can't wear shorts.

Women can wear shorts. They can wear, I'm not going to tell a woman how to dress. Beautiful. Oh, okay. Why are you telling a man how to dress? I'm just telling a man how to dress. I'm telling a man how to dress. Oh, said.

Got you there. I had nothing there. He's peaked Donnie right now. It's just half sentences. Yeah. Like half a pant. Yeah. Oh, it's a bloodbath.

You almost had him with pedophilia and he got out of it. He squirmed out of pedophilia. I'm so shocked you're not storm chasing right now. I had shit to do the others. I would be there. You worked with Donnie in New York, right? Of course. And I did, Storm chase.

Did you ever see this? Oh, you stormchased with him? We storm chased. We went to France together. I've never seen the Donny that you bring out of him. Yeah. You bring out a whole different Donny out of him. I don't know.

Roan's a better advocate. Rones, I like the Rone. The Donny Rhone brings that. We got arrested together. Yeah. Get a nice restaurant. You pointed to Nick when you say Roned. I pointed to this side of the room.

Rone's over there. Yeah, but he's this way to me. No, he's not. I have to spin this way. Rones over there. You just point straight. He's this way. You're pointing to me and Nick.

We got arrested together. We got a, there was a riot in France we were in together. Yeah, tear gas. But I will say, I think in that riot, we might have both been wearing shorts. Yeah, but we were in a foreign country. Okay, good point. Good point. They were capris.

Their national pantas capri, so it's half a short anyway. Yeah. Did you wear shorts in China? I don't think you're allowed. Oh. China was pretty strict. It's very buttoned up. So all summer from here until the east.

end of labor day no i'll have shorts on depends on what i'm doing if i'm golfing if i'm out i'm out sorry i'm saying i'm saying here in the office will you be in the office you'll see me in shorts if i come back from golf and i'll change in the pants i hate that i'm with him but i'm with you can't back down though you have to wear you have to wear shorter and less shorts more frequently well that's going to get him harder and harder mm-hmm what are you soft soft as hell you can feel it you want tan is fuck right now down thank you cuban tanner than him remember this battle you had a month ago oh yeah he's got Got you, he's 10.

I've been working. I've been working. Yeah. I need to get out there vacation. But it's not a fair fight. He's Cuba. Yeah, you can't get me. You can't get me with that.

No, I can't get him with that. How many vacations? How many vacations? We have unlimited. Someone's got to take them. Yeah. True. You don't use it.

You lose? Get my job done. It's a finite resource vacation. Make a cast a roll. Take a month off. You know? Hey. Doesn't matter to me.

Wow, that was mean. Hey, look, I know the work I do here. I'm fine with it. So as long as you and Dave are happy, you do great work with this guy. Yeah. Donnie's a fucking earner. How was,

how was Mr. Top? It was good Top. Yeah. I know you're a big, big top guy. He was not a top guy. Yeah. And you couldn't name one of the song.

Well, when you put pressure on someone, I can't name anything. I couldn't name my siblings if you had. Name a state. Mississippi. There you go.

Damn. Yeah, I had one of 50. If you asked me, Yeah, fine, I got that. Easy. If you asked you name what? I was going to say Ontario, but if you asked for a province and Canada.

You just answered your question. Yeah, you asked yourself. Yeah, well, I got it right. Ask yourself another question. You were saying that you were prepared if you were going to be asked. See if you can stump yourself. I probably could if we have enough time. I don't know how to ask that question.

Teddy Roosevelt, spent the most time out of office. I like this trivia. Wait, Teddy Roosevelt spent a lot of time out of office. He spent out of all the presidents, yeah, he spent the most time out of the office, and he's remembered for the national parks. So I was out of the office lot. You're like the Teddy Roosevelt. And then who's a president that stayed in?

He's probably Warren. Andrew Jackson or someone. Give us another one. Answer your own question before you even ask it. Eleanor. Rigby? No, it's one of the Roosevelt's wife. Oh, okay.

Not his. His kid or something? FDRs. You got, all right, see, there you go. You got your question wrong. He did it. No president wore shorts. I'll say that.

I bet we can find a president in shorts. No. Maybe JFK on his boat. What happened to him? Obama. Look what happened to him. Where's he now? It was because of the shorts.

Yeah.