The Yak - It's The Three-Year Anniversary of the Visual Yak | The Yak 2-1-24

Episode Date: February 1, 2024

The answer is a Riesen candy.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Oh, he is drenched! KB, no! Oh my god! KB! Look at him! Oh!

Oh! He's so hot! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I'm the Joker, baby! Bitch, you the robot. In New York! This is a catastrophe. Let me see that aux cord. Drop the data. Chicago.

No! No! Big Head! Chicago. No. No. Big Head. Cat X. Montanian Nebraska. Grandin. Gooby. Fun Ass Guy.

Doug Winnow. Cream Pie Guy. Cricket. Wow. What the fuck? What was that? That was Nerdy Gallo. Nerdy Gallo. That was the fucking man.

Holy fucking shit. That was incredible. Yeah, that was really good. It's the Yak presented by Roback. Roback.com. Use promo code Yak. 20% off your first purchase. Cues his polos, hoodies Yak presented by Roback. Roback.com. Use promo code Yak. 20% off your first purchase. Cues his polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts.

Roback.com. What did I just watch? That was so fucking... Nerdy Gallo is... He makes a lot of really, really good shit. I gotta follow this guy. Yeah. Can I just see the beginning?

He's the man. Not the actual video game, but I see the beginning again real quick. That was incredible. Oh, he is drenched. Not the actual video game, but I see the beginning again real quick. That was incredible. Oh, he is drenched. KB, no. Oh, my God. Look at him.

Pastors eat pussy, too. What? No, we got it. Oh, there's so many little hit things. I'm in love. Oh, man. So sick. Shout out Nerdy Gallo.

I'm following him right now. I know, I follow him. He does all kinds of art. Wait, what has he done for us? He's done a lot of good art. He's done a really good basketball shoes trailer as well. Yes. He made me a painting.

That's right. Okay. Nerdy Gallo. that was awesome that was fucking awesome is that our new intro it's probably too long but we could do the right up until he plugs it in yeah fuck yes that's the guy where my vibes are high now we're like we should hire him but he has like a legitimately good job right he's like i want to work with these fucks that guy's talented he can't work here i don't want to have to do the dozen i'm out i love doing the dozen i wasn't i don't know we'll see that'll be clipped that'll be clipped uh what's up guys hey what's going on fights is here again i am here again doing the gauntlet today am i today

oh yeah all right oh yeah i haven't hit a shot since i got here i've probably taken 20 so i'm excited to watch you i think you're gonna be good you're you're the type of guy that does good at these kind of things yeah yeah the birkenstocks are off i'll be honest that was a conscious decision yeah like now this isn't an accident this was dan mentioned a gauntlet yesterday off. I'll be honest. That was a conscious decision. This isn't an accident. This was Dan mentioned a gauntlet yesterday. I might have to run. And also we do a good job of bullying each other out of weird clothes and stuff on this show.

Kyle just wore regular sneakers one day and then he literally gifted. We taped the show one day and that night we did our Christmas special. We did Secret Santa. We made fun of his shoes so much during the show he gave and that night we did our christmas special we did secret santa we made fun of his shoes so much during the show he gave his shoes away in secret santa yeah they were jordan one we just bro that's the sneak black and gray that's the show wait were they the ones i got you for your birthday okay hold up i still have those and i didn't do that gift exchange

those are a separate jordan okay okay it didn't do that at the gift exchange. Those are a separate Jordan. Okay, okay. That didn't fit. You were dressed like the Ridiculousness couch. Yes. The fourth pair. Yeah. This show is male friendship where it's like, oh, you think you're better than us?

We're going to make you put away your sneakers. This is not for experimentation. I wore low-cut socks one day, and I'd never again. That's a new thing that guys can't do, apparently. No. I thought the low-cut socks were cool, guys. Everyone's like. That's a new thing that guys can't do, apparently. No, I... I thought the low-cut socks were a cool guy thing. Everyone's like, do not do that again. You also did that to yourself.

Yeah, I know, but you guys were very much like, that's a bad look. I was like, you're right. I go right in between. Yeah. Not too low, not too high. Five of us are wearing black joggers right now. Yeah. Because I'm too scared to wear anything else.

The jogger thing is, you're in sweatpants. You're in sweatpants. You're in sweatpants. That's the thing. But if I wear jeans, everyone's going to be like, you got a court date? I don't want to get high and mighty. What a place to be in in life where you wear a button. It's like, whoa, someone got arrested. I think I wore sweats in once and Brandon was like, cozy today.

I was like, what the fuck, man? You can't wear sweats. I know. Speaking of arrested. Oh. Oh, yeah, dude. I'm a real boy. Free shirts till it's backwards.

Have the tag in the front. Let that man go. What happened? Let him go. Let that man go. Oh. Oh, they got him. Wait, is this Times Square?

Yeah. I like it. Surprisingly docile. Yeah. It is hard to get arrested in Times Square. He's on his TikTok since saying he was subway surfing. No. Which is very, very dangerous. No, are you serious?

I don't know what that means. Collecting coins on the track? Subway surfing is when you're on top of the subway. Sure as hell wasn't doing that. No. That's crazy. They do the train surfing in India. Yeah.

Jews are just like. Well, that's because they're so crowded. Oh, yeah, that's true. That's not. You buy a ticket for the roof. That's by necessity. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait, so what did he get arrested for?

He said he was subway surfing. That's it. But he wasn't. He's out of jail. He's not in jail. He's not in jail. I guess that could mean going from train car to train car. Oh's it. But what he wasn't he's not in jail. He's not in jail. I guess that could mean going from train car to train car. Oh yeah.

You're not standing in the two. That's an appropriation of subway surfing. Yeah. That's not it. Yeah. He's got to chill. Yeah. I don't think you can go in between the cars. But it's also the New York subway. I mean I've seen some shit on the new york he's probably

screaming and being annoying as fuck the one thing that always yes yeah sucked about the new york subway when you think you get an empty car and then you get in there and it's like oh yeah someone took a shit you like think that for some reason in your brain you're like this is my lucky day i'm gonna get to sit down and you get in there and you're like yeah there's a reason why this is my lucky day. I'm going to get to sit down and you get in there and you're like, yeah, there's a reason why this is empty. There's a dead body in the corner. And then you still sit down. I got a fucking ticket for subway surfing.

What a bunch of bullshit. How's he moving there? Yeah, wait, what? Is he on like a hoverboard? What's he doing? He's gliding. What a steady ass step.

That is a steady step. Yeah, but now he's anti-America. He's moving to Longyearbyen in the North Pole. What? What? The most northern city in the world. He's moving to Longyearbyen. Svalbard. Now being beat up your bit. I hope he moves.

Did he get beat up? I think his nose is just red. That's the North Pole. Tough day for Indiana basketball. You get world t-shirts arrested in the india yeah no that's motivation i wonder how many mug shots are out there in like uh saturdays over the boys shirt oh probably a decent amount i bet you a lot you can go to the website and see them all right go to state and county so you can probably arrest arr.st-R-R dot S-T is the website. I go to Wheeling or Ohio counties

all the time and see who I know. Are they up forever? Yeah. Yeah. You could pay to get them taken down off the website. It's a little bit wrong.

Yeah, that's kind of fucked up. I've never seen it. I think mine I have I think most of mine were underage. Oh, you had the Brady.

The Brady one is the only mugshot of mine I've ever seen. Those were cool mugshots. That's a cool mugshot. That was a good one. I'd be so pissed if I got arrested and then had a gay mugshot. Yeah.

Or like the Mac Jones cry face. Wait. Oh, fuck. I forgot about that. DUI, right? Yeah, I had a DUI, and he was like mid-cry. Dude, that's a real bad thing as a professional athlete if you're so bad that your DUI just doesn't come up.

Right. We don't want to kick you down. Oh, he's ugly. That would 100% be me. Are you kidding me? It's true. No one's like, DUI, Mac Jones. No, he just sucks. Yeah, right. I think people found that and they were just like, wait, his name's McCorkle?

Yeah. And they forgot about everything else. That's exactly what happened. That's his name? Yeah. Yeah, McCorkle. I always forget that. But yeah, if he was an awesome quarterback, people would bring up the DUI more. They'll be on a best-selling t-shirt.

Right. Like a Pat from a home set of DUI. That is sad. It's so sad. His quarterback play for the New England Patriots is more offensive than getting behind the wheel and endangering lives. So this is actually like Deshaun Watson should start sucking really bad. It has come up a lot less in the last year or two.

It's true because he's not winning. He hasn't been playing. You're right. Pretty good PR. Yeah, so if you ever get arrested as a professional athlete, just start sucking. And no one will bother you. What's up, Brendan? Oh, hey.

I like that jersey. Thank you. I accidentally bought a size too small, but it's good. Scotty Pippen. Is it too small? A little bit. A little bit. You look great.

You see all the folds. Yeah, it's really tucking into some of those crannies. Yeah. We didn't have lunch today. I'm struggling with it. I don't know if you are. I might have to leave here in a couple minutes it. I don't know if you are. I might have to leave here in a couple minutes to go eat lunch.

You got to feed. I got to feed. You got to feed. It's feeding time. Time to get to the trough. Sounds like it's here now because there's a lot of noise from that area. You can always hear the buzz change. How many calories do you think you eat a day?

Yeah, probably. I'm going to say 3,200. Not that much. I don't eat that much i saw you walking out yesterday with two to-go sandwiches for your ride home well that was two days ago and yeah that that happened it was they were not sandwiches they were burgers you have a chick-fil-a meal every day i the healthiest of the fast foods you get a chick-fil-a meal as a backup sure sometimes you know what i saw something um that i think you'll be able to relate to, and I think you will as well.

You called out the fat guy. Well, I'm with you. I'm with you. No, but you could just, like, decide to not be. Like, you could come in tomorrow. Your body changes an insane. You could look like the most, you know, like the, what's that Indian guy who did the Marvel movie? Not Johnny. Yes. You could look like him tomorrow and be like like the – what's that Indian guy who did the Marvel movie?

Kailan Manjiani. Yes. You could look like him tomorrow and be like, John, what have you been doing? He's like, I just did like six pearls. He did do that. Remember, he just showed up jacked his hell. He was like, yeah, I did 12 push-ups this morning. Okay, but go on.

It was from – was it New Heights, whatever the Kelsey podcast is? And Jason was talking about how he doesn't do value meals. And Travis was very surprised by that. And I was like, that's an eater right there. What? Eaters don't do value meals. I show up, I'll be like, I'll do this sandwich, I'll do that sandwich. Yeah, you pick your shoes off of everything.

You don't do value meals? No. If you just show up and you're like, I'll do a number three. Who are these people? There's also a rich guy. There's a bunch of them. Wow. You want to show the courts? Who are these people? There's also a rich guy. There's a bunch of them. Wow. Do you want to show the court?

Who are these people? Wait, let's cram the room. It's like a college field. Are they clients? I don't know. Or is it a school? Are you guys a school or are you clients? Are you a school?

Clients. Oh, okay. Nice. Thank you very much. If you're a school, so help you. Yeah. Get the fuck out. You're about to get whacked.

What middle school are you guys? Yeah, no, you're right. I don't you. Yeah. Get the fuck out. You're about to get wet. What middle school are you guys? Yeah, no, you're right. I don't, I would never do a value meal. I just pick and choose everything. Isn't that also a rich guy thing? That's a rich guy thing. That's more of a rich guy than a fat guy. I did that last night for Wendy's.

I think that's more of an eater. Fat guys will just get multiple value meals. Nah, because I don't need multiple fries. I just need, I need a couple sandwiches. That always pissed me off. Oh, you got to get the Wendy's four for four. That's just what, chicken nuggets, a tiny Oh, you got to get the Wendy's four for four. That's just what? Chicken nuggets, a tiny sandwich?

You got to get three of them. That's not going to fill you up. No. I've been doing a bad move that I got to break myself out of. I take my son to school, and then I come to work, and on the way to work, I stop at a bakery and just get a blueberry muffin and a piece of banana bread every morning sounds fine and that's not health like that's you said that's like a thousand calories banana dude i know but it's like oh there's chocolate in the banana also you gotta walk in there right that's true that's extra walking you wouldn't have done you think to yourself like oh i'm just having a couple

quick snack oh megan he's got tacos, she's... Megan makes me a plate whenever. You had Katie do that for you in the New York office. Yeah, Megan's my new Katie. All the clients. The clients. Looks like a church group, dude. Yeah. It does look like well-behaved clients.

Which we yelled at. Where'd they go? Suck our dick. I think they're in the PMT room now. We need you. Give us room now. We need you. Give us your money. We need you so bad. Please, please.

Lock the doors. You should start doing that. Lock the doors on these fuckers. Well, if people want to take shifts and go eat, Brandon, you can go eat. I don't need to go eat. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

Go eat. Are you really? Yeah. No, he's going to eat. Go. That's kidding. I'm just kidding. Go eat. Are you really? Yeah, no, he's going to eat. Go. That's crazy. Bring me back something. Bring me back a little something.

Because what happens if Brandon doesn't go eat, he's going to get restless, and by the, like, when we're an hour in, he's going to be like, can we wrap this up? He gets lethargic and mum. Yeah. So he needs to eat now, and that way he can have his energy. He is like someone who eats for energy. It's like. I'm that way. I'm the opposite. He is like someone who eats for energy. It's like – I'm the opposite.

When I eat, I get tired. I'll do like – well, I can't fall asleep unless I'm tired. Dude, his food works. No, no, no. When you eat, though, I get tired. Do you not get tired after you eat? No, I'm like energized. I'm in the same boat as Brandon.

I'm tired. I need to eat something. I'm honestly zoning out a little bit. I should probably go eat. Go eat. I might go eat. Whenever I eat, I get tired. Maybe I eat too much. I'm honestly zoning out a little bit. I should probably go eat. Go eat. I might go eat. Whenever I eat, I get tired. Maybe I eat too much.

I do. Yeah, you're eating too much, which is, I do it too. I never feel like ready to go after. I've never felt energized after eating. Right. I'm always just pretty tired, though. True. Yeah, I've never been like, oh, here's three tacos.

Now I'm ready to attack the day. Yeah, if you cut it at one or two. But at night, I can't fall asleep unless I've never been like, oh, here's three tacos. Now I'm ready to attack the day. Yeah, if you cut it at one or two. But at night, I can't fall asleep unless I've eaten. I eat in bed, full meals, in order to just pass out. Do you have a crummy bed? I was just saying yesterday, I need to get one of those things at fancy steakhouses where they come and clean the tablecloth. I need that for my sheets in the morning.

John is a sleeper that is like, if you saw it, you'd be like, what is, does this guy have a job? He sleeps like a homeless man. I've stayed over John's place a few times and there was one, like his sheets are never really on. Remember that one time I came over and you slept on your laptop battery and you like burned yourself? That happened regularly. There's like one pillow with not a pillowcase and snores. Like blisters. Oh my God.

Yeah, no, if you saw John Sleepy, you'd be like, this guy does not, he has nothing going for him. Bro, I forgot about that. I slept over at your place once and we lived like a block away from each other. Yeah, yeah. Whatever. And I woke up on your couch and you were just shirtless underwear at your like island on your computer. It was probably 430 in the morning.

I'm like, dude, what are you doing? And you're like, I'm tracking a flight. What the fuck? You're tracking your buddy's flight? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He was coming from like San Francisco.

I think we were going to London or something like that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He also, like, you can't wake John up if you're, like, getting up, closing doors, doing that. He'll just sleep. Heavy sleeper? No blinds. Just, like, so bright. Bro, I'm still sleeping.

My apartment in New York, I've been in for, like, three or four years now. There's not a blind in the whole place. It's crazy. Yeah, you're right. It's crazy. And, like, you have, like, those floor-to-ceiling windows in the friday is a bright home it's crazy doesn't matter no you're still waking up like late in the day uh no i'll get up like 8 30 that's that's you set an alarm despite the sun yeah no i rarely set an alarm yeah because then you'd have to

actually plug in your phone yeah yeah i don't plug my phone in at night. Everything I do is just like an accident. Yeah. Like I happen to be there. It's crazy. Wait, so you would get like third degree MacBook burn? Yeah. You would just sleep on it. You'd be hospitalized for it?

No, no, no, no. Blistered? Yeah, blistered. Those do get really hot. I know. Yeah. You just have it in his bed. You have like cords everywhere.

He's a crazy sleeper yeah he just when he's when he's out he's out yeah it's it's like uh it's kind of what you were saying we're like like i just go till the battery's empty yeah i don't ever go to bed i just run out of i'm not like all right time to go to sleep stop where you stop where you stop Ooh bedtime That's so funny Yeah bedtime sounds lame as hell Now that I think about it I can't fathom the idea of like brushing my teeth And getting ready for sleep

And fucking myself into brushing my teeth He just powers down Yeah he just powers down Like tire yourself out like a toddler Yeah the TV will be on And I'll just go to sleep It's so funny Yeah you like a toddler. Yeah, the TV will be on and I'll just go to sleep. It's so funny.

Yeah. Yeah, you are a toddler. Yeah, very much so. Yeah. Very much. I look like one the whole thing. Get in a car. Awesome life. Yeah, it's pretty solid, but I got no complaints thus far.

Yeah. Yeah, you get in a car and like 10 minutes in, you're just like, I'm out. Sleeping. At least you eat healthy. I eat a lot of candy and snacks, but when I consume food, I usually eat pretty healthy. No, I was kidding. You do? Yeah, like when I have a meal.

You have the nutritional intake of a movie theater seat. You're not wrong on that. I eat a lot of snacks and candy. Pat actually got a pre-diabetes scare the other day That has kind of shaken me to my core a little bit Wait Pat? Out of the gay variety?

Of the gay variety, yeah He has pre-diabetes He does? Everybody, I guess And his doctor was like Do you snack a lot? And he's like, I have like M&M's every night And he's like, well that's probably what does it

And I was like, I have M&M's every morning Like that's how I start my day A have like M&M's every night. And he's like, well, that's probably what does it. And I was like, I have M&M's every morning. Like, that's how I start my day. With a handful of M&M's. Oh. Yeah, I didn't know. He's like in good shape. I've heard skinny people can be pre-diabetic. Oh, so I'm good.

If you have like a muscular build, your body uses the energy. I think DK Metcalf just eats like candy yeah yeah or like uh chad otrasenko he'd spit down every day it's not fair yeah that's fucked yeah and you like those type of guys like if they cut that out they probably i feel like they'd be better but they're already the best yeah why why would they wouldn't you want to? Yeah, Derrick Rose used to eat, like, there would be, like, a guy on the sidelines who'd, like, give him a bag of gummy worms. Why not? Like, in the middle of the— Eat like shit.

Yeah. I mean, Marshawn, yeah. I think Zidane O'Chara and Ovechkin like a Coca-Cola on the bench. That's awesome. Why not? In a water bottle? That'd be so sick. No, they would—O'Chara at least has a picture of him getting caught once where

it was just a bottle of Coca-Cola. He was just drinking it. The guy that invented the Atkins diet slipped on ice and died. Is that true? Yep. So like, I bet you he regretted not having Coca-Cola. Yeah, but he did get to eat the steak. Was that Atkins?

Yeah, Atkins was no carbs, right? Yeah, that was just people eating like bacon. Yeah. Oh yeah, there he is. Oh yeah. Yeah, just eating so much bacon that your heart clogs up. That kind of rules. How are the tacos? Are you going to be energized?

Yeah, I'm feeling it coming back. Wait, you guys have lunch? Is it in February? I decided to go through the end of this week, so that way when we go to Vegas, I don't have to deal with everyone being like, where's lunch? That's smart.

Paige is genuinely concerned about an office coup. Yeah, that's why I want to be out of here. I've got some ideas in my head to try to figure out how we can keep this going. I would imagine it can happen. No, you give too much. This can't be the baseline. Just a fantastic free meal for everyone.

Can I ask how many of these you paid for? You paid for all of them? No, we used the money for the Christmas party. Right, right, right. But no one was offering you freebies and stuff like that? Oh, I think we got some freebies. Some freebies. I bet if you wanted to, you could run freebies.

I'm working on stuff. I guess we get, I didn't know this, but we get $80 at Uber Eats. Yeah. Yeah. It goes fast. Right. So I'm thinking about maybe suspending that and putting that in a- Very fine with that.

Right. Putting it in a big pot, using that, maybe a little of my money. We did, how was the Laugh Factory last night? It went really, really well. It was fantastic. Doing that, that's like one of those weird things where it's like not enough money to Maybe a little of my money. How was the Laugh Factory last night? It went really, really well. It was fantastic. That's one of those weird things where it's not enough money to be like, oh, this is a ton of money.

We should do an advertising deal. That's just a lunch show. Right. Fine with that. Everyone from the office has to just do one of these a year. You have to do a set for lunch. Just so that we can keep lunch going. I got some ideas. That's smart.

Can I tell you something about the laugh factory last night that first of all everyone was incredibly funny hank was great yeah by the by the pay-per-view hank was very comfortable yeah yeah he doesn't want people to buy the paper it's actually the only time where it's like it kind of rules the position hanks in because people are complaining about the pay-per-view like it's five dollars but people are complaining because i understand it everyone isn't it less might be i think it's 290 i thought it was 290 it might be but either way like i understand i don't want to get in the pay-per-view debate i get it like a lot of our content is free so when we say to charge i understand people are like i don't want to do that but hank is actually

in a spot where he's like great don't buy it because he doesn't want to buy it so he's being honest last night was last night was interesting funny it was it went 20 20 minutes yeah wow so he's gonna be fine because we're like all right when the red light's on you have what two minutes left yeah he just didn't look at it yeah of course so wait what were you gonna say about the laugh factory before the show hank called me like an hour beforehand and he's like you're coming and i was like yeah and he's like okay i'm gonna do this thing where i come out on stage and i'm like oh shit is that feidelberg and then the show's gonna start and i don't like to step on creativity so i was just like i'm a yes and guy and i was

like all right sounds great i hung up the phone i was with owen and paz i was like this is gonna be a disaster like no one's gonna give a fuck that i'm there like i'm well aware of who i am i'm not a larger than life. Like, oh, shit, is that so-and-so? That was the funniest part for me. I heard some gasps. I think Hank was like, that guy looks like Fido Bird. Dude, I was 100 miles away from the stage.

I texted Hank before he came out. I was like, yo, I'm pretty far, just so you know. And I was like, but I'm down for anything. And he got out there, and he's like, is that Fido Bird? Yeah, that was the first thing you know. And I was like, but I'm down for anything. And he got out there, and he's like, is that Feidelberg? That was the first thing he said. And I was like, the silence. And then he's like, is that Feidelberg? He said it again.

Silence. And I was like, yeah, it's me, Hank. And then the show just went on from there. It was like, everyone's like, don't give a shit, dude. Keep talking. You were up and far away, no lights. His plan was to run towards you and tap you up. That's why when I texted him that I was and far away, no lights. His plan was to run towards you and dap you up. That's why when I texted him that I was so far away,

I was thinking and hoping that would mean, ah, never mind, let's scrap it. And when he got on stage and still did it, I was like, no! But he needs like those, if he had ran and dapped you up, that's another minute off his set. But he didn't need it. He did five minutes longer. I was telling him that he should just start the set in Vegas

and be like, I'm going to try to break the record for the longest holding of breath and just do that until he passes out. And it's his corpse on the stage. Yeah, like CPR. Then he wakes up and is like, all right, you just killed 30 minutes. He'll be fine to talk for an hour because he did 20, and then he was like, all right, next topic. And then he was like, yeah, he had way more.

He was funny. He was confident. He was good. There it is, like, all right, next topic. And then he was like, yeah, he had way more. He was funny. He was confident. He was good. There it is, 499. 499. Yeah. He's going to crust. He's going to crush it.

He's going to crust. He's going to crust. Oh, that's yuck. I was reading quest as I was saying crush. Yeah, but if somebody's going to crush. I think he will. I think he's going to crush. He's going to crush.

Because that's like. That was an all-time stupid thing. No, no, no. I think you're right. I couldn't read a word while saying another word. I think he's going to crust. He's going to crust. That was an all-time stupid thing. No, no, no. I think you're right. I couldn't read a word while saying another word. I think he will crust. That was pretty. He's going to crust.

He's going to crust. How did Hank do last night? Yeah, he crusted. He crusted. Brandon's eating all the tacos. Every taco. What is going on? Oh, that's from I Hate Steven Singer.

Oh, yeah. I love these. I've been feeling with this the whole time. Oh, shit. What? I just saw this. What is it? It's the shirt.

Oh. It startled you? Oh, it's this. Oh. Letter scheme. I got you. I'm with you. I didn't want to spell it out for you guys.

I did the same thing yesterday. I was like, what the hell is that? Oh, my God. What? Come on, now. Oh, hell no. Put that thing away. Can't be folding it like that.

I got shit out of my hand. Oh, my God. How was Morrow's big trick that he'd never done? I was in the green room. I was also in the green room, but I heard he crushed. Did he? Yeah. How are you done before Brandon? We're back.

What was his avant-garde shit? He called somebody. Oh, he called. And also Billy was the helper. Dude, sitting next to Billy was so funny because I don't talk to Billy all that often. So just talking to someone whose brain works completely differently than yours. Works is a funny word. He was telling me about being in Africa and having to, like, run from the gorillas or something.

And I was like, oh, damn, were you like, I'm going to die? And he's like, no, no. I was like, I'm going to have to fight this gorilla. I was like, all right, my brain just processes that information differently. He's something special. How was he at handball? Did anyone see? I had to leave.

Handball was so much fun. It looked awesome. Yeah. I want to play some more handball. So have your thoughts on the sport? No, it's so easy. Yeah? Yeah, yeah.

The clips have looked particularly easy i mean you get to skip twice you guys are all posting like your highlights yeah yeah you shouldn't have a highlight after the first time you play well the the the part of handball that's a little confusing that i learned halfway through is you can just like hug someone and they have to reset the entire possession on defense oh yeah i was just hugging max every time he had the ball and they have to reset the entire possession on defense. Oh, yeah. So I was just hugging Max every time he had the ball, and they'd have to check it up, and he was getting so frustrated. I hugged him like seven times. It was great.

Look at that. That was a great shot. I mean, it's easy. And that's a real goalie. Did you guys play against the actual tan ball players? I think they might have after I left. We played a four-on on four barstool people with real goalies.

Oh, those were actual goalies? Yeah, yeah. So you scored on real goalies? Three times. That shouldn't happen. Three times. Tough, yeah.

You had a hat trick? You have a clip of me hugging Max? It looks like the dumbest thing when that's how you play defense. You just hug. Yeah, I had a hat trick. You had a hat trick?

Yeah. No big deal. Damn. Having played in that game. Oh, yeah. Steven was the worst, by the way.. You at a hat trick? Yeah. God damn. Having played in that game. Oh, yeah. Steven was the worst, by the way. I forgot about that. Why?

He was complaining about everything. He traveled. He threw one that hit on top of the golf simulator and tried to complain that that wasn't out of bounds. What? Well, it came back in. Nobody blew a whistle. Anyway. I saw Stephen Che

before it without his glasses on. And that was John. That's a nice shot. Yeah. It's a very fun game. Your theory is correct. Josh Allen is the best handball player in the world right now. Right. He could stand at half court and just score. That was sweet.

That was sick. That was one of the handball guys. Did you get any guff from them? No, they were actually they actually cleared it up beforehand. Apparently it's the Euros that get upset. So these guys were all like regular dudes and

they were like, yeah, Patrick Mahomes would be incredible. What are you talking about? J.D. was awesome. J.D., yeah, J.D. He was great on the broadcast too like just incredible making jokes about everything and great ambassador of the game right in that was a travel he got upset travel was really difficult because i i don't know how you would ref that i it maybe it's too much basketball brain or something but it felt like there were a lot of travels and then i don't know how you count four steps and then he said something about like jumping up and landing is like two steps i don't know it felt very arbitrary yeah i would call

travel because but that was not intuitive at all the jd guy was the man he was like he was cool like i even asked i was like what no offense but like what sport did the majority of these guys fail at to get here and he was like it's all over the place like soccer swimming basketball it's like oh okay that's cool then it's like you don't you don't handball is not the sport you just start playing yeah yeah you just don't pick that up yeah you're like i've topped out at this so i'm gonna go to handball yeah aau handball right right there's none of that but it is a sick apparently the problem is you can't play it on a basketball court it's too small like we were playing with less people so what do you play on? They have to find

gyms that have basketball courts next to each other. You can't just be like, oh, we'll just rent a YMCA and play. That's an issue. You should probably figure that out. That's a real issue. Design flaw in the game. It's like a B sport in some central

European country. They said Germany, Denmark, Norway, all the Scandinavian countries are huge. Is it an Olympic sport? Yes. That's where I watch it. Oh, yeah. And they have a real good league in Germany that sells out. The Bundesliga? I think they call it everything

the Bundesliga. Really? That covers multiple sports, right? That's what I think. There's multiple Bundesligas. It's a sick name. It's a great name. Yeah. It sounds almost German.

You've been to probably 10 Oktoberfests. I've been to zero. Yeah, handball Bundesliga. That's surprising. That is surprising. I like that I gave up that vibe, though. You do. It's a compliment.

By the way, we have breaking news What? Uh oh Oh boy Mac Jones got a DUI Wait What is this? Um

I think Let me see this I want to make sure that I don't Break it The wrong way I think Uh Yes

Ohio State is going full time Whoa Congrats Ohio State Yes Alright I'd. Whoa. Congrats, Ohio State. Yes. All right. I'd imagine he's going to move to Chicago. So, I mean, he hasn't ripped any of us. He's in Columbus, right?

Yeah. I would imagine it might be tough for him to show up to the New York office. I would think. I doubt he's welcome. I doubt he's welcome here. Oh, he's welcome here, though. Yeah. What?

I doubt he's afraid. No, probably not. Is he dropping out of school? Must be. I guess so. I guess that would be what he's afraid, though. Yeah. What? I doubt he's afraid. No, probably not. Is he dropping out of school? Must be. I guess so. I guess that would be what he's doing. Yeah. He was a middle school, I think.

Middle school dropout. Congrats to him. And a coach, right? Yeah. They lost coach. I got to hit him up. I heard a hell of a coach. Congrats, Tate.

It'd be good to have an Ohio State fan around here. Yeah. Brandon, are you going to feel threatened by that? A little bit. Yeah. But, I mean, I'll talk to him. Maybe we can do something. Are you?

Yeah. Why? Dave calls me Buckeye Brandon. Has he texted you today? He has not. I don't think. I don't know if he texted me yesterday. Oh, no.

Would that be his first miss? No, he missed on Saturday when they were doing that horse racing shit. He hasn't. Let's see. Portnoy, Portn doing that horse racing shit. He hasn't. Let's see. Portnoy, Portnoy, Portnoy. He's way. There's no way his name's actually Tate, right?

Because that would just be the perfect. No, it is. I believe it is. His name's Ohio's Tate. I want to do a show with him about Ohio State stuff. Yeah. I don't know what we'd call it, though. So many names.

Oh, his last one was Tuesday. Soave missed yesterday and he's missed today so far um oh so you did a little a little oh the conor mcgregor nice is he just walking out in the middle of school year oh i guess he is that feels awesome yeah i'll go full time damn so all he had to do to get full time was destroy the fucking lives of all those around him at Barstool. Again, not anyone here. No, you're right. He's got a home. He was smart how he did it.

Like, if he had sprayed everyone, he'd be like, wait, we don't want him here. But, yeah. Did Dave actually offer it to him, or did he just ask, do you want to go full time? Did he jump the gun and be like, fuck all you in the school, I'm out of here? Yeah. Oh, I was going to say not. Yeah. No, but yeah, I mean, Indians, Browns, Ohio State fan, Cavs fan, we could use it.

Yeah. Oh. Okay. Oh, wow. What's that? I can't read this TV. Chicago. This is clearly the location I should go to if i want

to follow the mantra of sorrows oh thank you okay all right shot is all that i'll have to hit him up oh i will hit you up well come on tate i'll hit you up all right who was shipping out to make room should we spin the wheel yeah i think we got to get rid of somebody we can't we're full it's been the big wheel i love the big we've got to get rid of somebody. We can't. We're full. Spin the big wheel. I love the big wheel. The big wheel is the best. I got some hate tweets about the big wheel. Why? Who?

What? Kirk Minahan wasn't on it. All right. Well, Kirk should be on it. It's a big mistake. I made this wheel about in-office New York employees when we were in New York so we could bring people into the studio. To fire them.

Right. And they got mad that Kirk wasn't on the firing wheel. I want Kirk. I want Coleman and Justin on the wheel. That's fine. Yeah. But it was an in-person thing at first. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We also need a Chicago wheel. Yeah. I can make that. But let's spin the big wheel right now. See who. Let's just wait until we find someone. From Chicago? Let's spin it until we get a Chicago person and then they're out.

Okay. Gone. Yeah, that's fair. Tate's in, they're out. Yeah. One in, one out. Got to keep the ratio. Well, we're all from the spot today.

Got to keep the ratio of nine and a half men to one woman. Who has to call them and tell them? It might be one of us. It could be one of us. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.

Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.

Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. That's awesome. The wheel is just.

Oh, yeah. Oh, fuck. I'm going to tell him to come down. Oh, my God. Who was it? Malasek. Malasek. Oh, no. The three worst, the four worst words for him to get a text, come on the air.

I guess we'll have to see if Tate's good in goal. Yeah, I don't know. Malasek has to go back to New York? No, he's fired. Oh, he's fired. I thought it was just getting him out of here. Actually, keep him on board and say he can't come. That would destroy him.

Hey. Hey, Jake. Hey, buddy. What's up, gay boy? We got some good news, bad news. All right. So the good news is Ohio State is going full time. Hey.

Let's go. Yeah. Congratulations. Good for him. The bad news is, well, no, also good news is he wants to move to Chicago. Great. The bad news is we have to get rid of someone for him to come here. We just spun the big wheel and it hit your neck. Is it me?

It's you. So get that soft dick out of here. Pack your bags. See ya. This show has ruined my life. I just said the four worst words you can get is come on the app.

Your mom texted you about last episode. What did your mom say? I told Jake this morning that I didn't realize you guys were all against him i still stand firmly with jake about what that it's better to go home and have a good story than go i think everybody was yeah yeah that's fine he like he took it too far into like a sad sack room almost my mom my mom texted me after the show when I came out as gay and she said every text is a separate line and it was in all caps rough day at work for you.

I cannot stop laughing. Oh no. Tough. Alright so I'm fired. No. Fired? Give mom good news. Yeah true. No more rough days at work. Yeah they won't bully me on the yak anymore. True, true.

Actually, no, you're... If you come out as gay right now, you could probably sue. That's a good point. You had your mom's first name as the contact? Yeah. What? Weird. I don't like that.

That was what, like... It's just so the contact list is structured. I've done it before. You do? The contacts list is... How often do you go to your contacts? No, but if I'm scrolling through, like, all my family is their name, so it's Malasek is the list.

Who uses the contact list? You just search the name. He scrolls through so he can count his body. Is someone else under Mommy? Uh, no. I do that too, Jay. Everything's normal. Everybody, first, last name.

First name, last name. Yeah, that's normal. That's fine. That's not normal. What is the noise? Uh, the food processor. Oh, in the kitchen. Okay, Donnie's making stuff. What is the noise? The food processor. Oh, in the kitchen. Donnie's making stuff.

That makes sense. Actually, you're not fired. Well, you're fired, but you have to come on the act every time we ask you to. Yeah. So it's the worst of all. You're just a roll-up guy now. Yeah, you're not in the office, but you have to stay in Chicago. If I start blogging, can I stay?

Well, you could reapply as a blogger. What would you blog about? Day 18 of being gay. No, I want to see you do the Chicago smoke shows and just probably pick out the most disgusting. My mom thinks we should do a bachelor game. Look at the fucking... I'm down to do a bachelor game.

Where all of you try and find a girl that I would actually... Yes. I would love to. Like a Yankee Swap bachelor? Absolutely do it. You could choose something you would like. with. Yes, I would love to. Like a Yankee Swap bachelor? Absolutely do it. Choose something you would like. That would be a great idea. Yankee Swap.

Should we do a Yankee Swap? Should we do a crash course bachelor, like a two-hour bachelor? I would. On the yak? Yeah. Yes. Wow. All right.

All right. So we – everyone's got to – any woman who wants to do it has to email Stephen Che. Yep. Stephen? Does he get to approve? Don to email Stephen Che. Yep. Stephen? Does he get to approve? Don't eat any of that pussy, Stephen. He doesn't know. Stephen?

Come on. We know you. No pussy eating. No puss. Do not. Strictly email on business. Stephen's just a little kid at an ice cream shop. Just one lick.

Come on. Come on. Come on. We have pussy at home, Steven. I ate all my vegetables. You have pussy in the fridge. Just let me get a taste. I've never had that flavor. Three samples.

You're not fired, Malasek. You know I love you. I love you guys. You're going to have to do the gauntlet today, though, and we need you to actually step up. I think handball might have brought me back oh really i got i was feeling good yesterday okay he saved like the best guy shot in penalties kicks oh i was feeling good and he was at rock bottom because he texted me after morrow went and just said i suck yeah i

have sucked i feel bad i thought you let morrow score on purpose because you felt bad that's what it's been looking like every time for the past 12 times. Can you pinpoint a moment where everything changed? I said yesterday, I said the day we did the stool streams with the penalty kicks where they kicked like 100 times, it might have cooked me. I think I got overkicked. Someone said it was Cam Newton that ended you. I don't know.

I mean, that ball was going crazy. Did he score on you in one shot? He just kicked it so hard. It might go back to when we made him take a shower. Oh, my God. You were better dirty. It might have been when we made you take a shower. It's like the Samson Bible story where they cut my hair.

Yeah. You've got to get dirty. Yeah. Is it because you were so sticky? I've been soaped. Yeah. Go roll around in the hay. Hay is outside, back?

Yeah. How long is this food processing going to happen? This is going to be the most liquefied fucking food. Like, look at it. Donnie, it's done. It's done, Donnie. Go tell him it's done, Jake.

All right. And then we'll call you back. I mean, it's just... Oh, he's live. Oh, shit. Oh. Oh, man. Way worse. Wow,. Oh. So, it's... Oh, man. Way worse.

Wow, this hell. Is somebody trying to quit weed in the chat? What is it? But I can't. This weed is addictive. You got this work, bro. Keep going. Focus.

That was a real supportive-ass chat. Wait. That's the nicest chat we got. Yeah, you got it. TJ, tell him to roll up a fat one right now. Oh. I'm so fucking stoned. Was that Malicek who turned it off?

I still hear it on the live. A little delay. It's a little delay. There it is. Wow. Okay, nice. Have you guys seen that dude who made, like, an app where you can go live and it looks like there's, like like 50,000 people watching

He does it with like girls at a bar I've seen it Oh yes yes yes But he also He has a bunch of shit himself Right he does have a lot of followers I don't know how that works That's I mean

He did it Malasek He said you guys have 45 minutes of no blender. And then he's back turning around. I can barely hear it. Oh, okay. All right. Okay. You can also shut the Johns.

He just gave us a... We could shut the Johns. He just gave us an ultimatum. Yep. You wore that pretty well. Yeah. Well, he is cooking for clients. Not for just dicking around.

Okay, I could Uber Eats for clients. Yeah. What if the client is from a restaurant that competes with the Uber Eats thing? That was actually, when we were playing handball, JD, very nice guy, was like, a ball went in the kitchen. He's like, oh no, Donnie's kitchen.

And I looked at him, I was like, it's fine. We can break anything. Jerry puked all over. We're good. Your pants are coming up too high. I know. I know. It's these deep seats, man. None of us are good.

My pants are up high too. Yeah. Same probably height. Yeah. Yeah. We should get recliners. Some Lazy Boys? I asked for a recliner. Oh yeah, you wanted it. Yeah, they never brought it. They keep saying it's coming.

I don't know what that means. How much do you think it would cost to buy Lazy Boy the company? A lot. You think? A lot, a lot. A lot, a lot. We're talking tees. Trillions?

Trillions. Trillions? No. Oh, trillions. It's probably a billion dollar business. I bet you it's not a billion dollar. I bet you could buy Lazy Boy for less than a billion. Yeah.

Oh! It's a billion dollar business. Everyone's got it's not a billion dollar. I bet you could buy Lazy Boy for less than a billion. Oh! It's a billion dollar business. Everyone's got to sit. It's a public company. Everyone has to sit. Is it just Lazy Boy is publicly? I kind of want to buy stock in Lazy Boy. We should have. We should go all in. Oh, was that the pandemic?

Oh no. What did the pandemic do to it? Probably bad because of shipping. Oh yeah, we thought supply chain was going to it? Probably bad because of shipping. But you'd think like- Oh, yeah. We thought supply chain was going to- But no, it actually went okay. I didn't know people were still buying Lazy Boy brand, though. Oh, yeah. They're so comfortable. Yeah?

And they're expensive as fuck. That's kind of like the brand. That's like the Kleenex. Yeah. Yeah. We call- We call it Lazy Boy. It's a good ass name.

Like Q-Tip. Oh, Q-Tip's not the- No, Q-Tip is a brand, though. No, it's a cotton swab. It's a good-ass name. Q-Tip. Oh, Q-Tip's not the... No, Q-Tip is a brand. No, it's a cotton swab. Cotton swab. Or Popsicle. Wait, it's not called... And he's right.

Kleenex is the same way. It's not called a Q-Tip? No, it's called a cotton swab. Popsicle is the one that... Why are you pointing a cucumber at me? Where did you get a cucumber from? That's his dick, Q-Tip. That's his zucchini squash.

Just in case he has to run the gauntlet. His dick. It's that for anyone. It's dick. It's for anyone. It's perfect for like believable big dick. Ain't no English cucumber. The long ones. You just have this here all the time?

Not all the time. No, I'm not a crazy person. You think I am? What the fuck kind of freak you think I am? All the time? That's when I use it. Oh, no. Thank you.

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$50. $50 right there. Do it. Good deal. Rent.app slash barstool. Connor Griffin pointed out to me that today is the visual yak's birthday. No way.

YouTube, yes? Three years ago today was the first visual yak. Wow. We're a visual show now. How many years ago? Three. Three. That was when I was wet as hell.

Yes. Wow. There's KB wet. What is my hair? What is going on? Well, how are you here? Whoa. Look at Brandon. Wait, Brandon. Are you wearing a wizard's cloak? What is going on? How are you here? Wait, Brandon, are you wearing a wizard's cloak?

Who's that? Andre the Giant. Remember we said we were going to dress up as wrestlers and all I did was buy Andre the Giant. Wait, why do we all look so different? We all look so different. Wait, were you wet that day? What the fuck? I don't know.

Yeah, I was sweaty and wet. And wet. Wait, were you wet that day? What the fuck? I don't know. Yeah, I was sweaty and wet. And wet. Wait, you hadn't just done the wheel? No, I think you're just sweaty. No, he was just sweaty. Because this was the first visual and we weren't doing wet. The wheel is still almost a year away. Why is my hair like that?

Yeah, you look older. I know. Wait, scroll down. Let's see this. I have a mustache? I don't like this. Brandon, you look like you're 12. This was originally on the Barstool main YouTube channel. Let's see this. I have a mustache? I don't like this. Brandon, you look like you're 12. This was originally on the Barstool main YouTube channel.

That's right. Re-uploading every day onto this channel. That's right. We've come a long way, boys. Kyle, you look... Disgusting. That's a dying boy. I know.

I was. You look so little, Nick. I have a low chair, I think. Yeah, because Owen's towering over you. Kyle, pause this, man. That wasn't wet wheel. I was unhealthy. Oh, my God.

Holy shit. You look like you're under a heat lamp or something. I know. What was going on? I was living like that. But what does that mean? No one ever told me. No one ever had an intervention.

Like, hey, shit. Try out. Stop sweating. Try out. You just let me live like that. But what was the issue? That was a lot. It was very unhealthy.

But, like, what were you doing? Drinking every day. Okay. Yeah. That'll do it. Not eating healthy. Not working out. Not sleeping. The stuff. The stuff. The stuff. Yeah. Yeah, do it. Not eating healthy, not working out, not sleeping.

The stuff. The stuff. The stuff. Yeah, man. Wow. You look way better. Thank you. Yeah, you've got a nice glow up.

You used to be so red. I know. That was depressing. People would always ask me if I just worked out. Yeah, you looked like you were under duress. I don't know how to fix it though that that that day it was like snowing out so the snow melted on my scalp are you sure nobody pretty sure positive we can look up the weather because i scurried in new york

february didn't last second from my apartment So your face was a very bad snow day. I had to stay over in New York the night before because Pick Central was premiering that day. Oh, I did too. Yes. That was that day? I had to train at like 1130 at night to get in on time for my parents. I got a hotel that night. Yeah.

That's three years. Wow. It's kind of crazy. Yeah. I feel like it's been longer. I guess because it's visual it was the yak before that was what three years on top of that we weren't on visual the whole time no we're just serious we were just it's serious but we had like the closed feed we could do social

clips from oh that's why i was gonna say we definitely clipped the Garth Pittsburgh when he called in. Reason. Yeah. When he was just sitting. That was serious. What did he call it about again? I wasn't here at the time. Gar.

Gar. He was all nervous. Someone was doing work at his house and he had a bong. Was he sitting under a beam? Yeah. He was just high as hell. He was sitting in a parking lot being like, what are they doing in my house? It was just like the maintenance guys and he was worried they would rat on him.

Yeah. So he sprayed his apartment with a ray. That could be interesting. Gar, go ahead, Gar. My thoughts are my apartment, this maintenance guy just showed up, and he saw like an ace of weed on my table. Are they narcs? Are maintenance narcs?

Yes. Are you high right now, Gar narcs? Yes. Ooh. Are you high right now, Gar? Yes, I'm high. But I'm not a high-drafted ball. Where is the maintenance guy right now? Is he hearing you talk about how you're high and if he's a narc? No, no.

He knocked on the door. He came in. He saw the bag of weed on my counter. And now he's doing his maintenance shit. And I just, like, walked out immediately. Dude, I would call the cops, dude. I feel like that's the only thing you could do right now i was just call the cops and just come clean right now i sprayed a bunch of raid because raid actually smells pretty good but like i don't you were spraying raid raid raid actually smells really good like if

you're in a bathroom keep listening gar we doesn't. It's literally poison. Keep listening, Gar. We'll discuss this, but we also have a maintenance guy who called in. Maybe it's your maintenance guy. We're going to take his call. This guy's spraying rain all over the place. Thanks for the call, Gar. He's freaking out right now, just running around Pittsburgh. Mike, who else were you going to call? What did the maintenance guy say?

Oh, that was the funniest part. I'll answer this question. Mike, you're a maintenance man. What's up? Hey, what's up, boys? Yeah, go ahead. Explain man. What's up? Hey, what's up, boys? Yeah, go ahead. Explain it. Gar's fucked.

Gar's fucked. Gar's fucked. Oh, what a legend, Gar. We should set callers back up. Yeah. Remember the way, way back when it was just radio show, the guy who called in thinking he was calling into KFC radio? That was really funny.

Wait, remind me. A guy called into the Yak, and he thought he was leaving a voicemail on KFC radio. Oh, yes. And I just kept on doing the voicemail thing to him and kept on restarting. I don't know if you can find it, TJ. Maybe do like a callers well oh rose color the thing is most of them weren't right no most of them were great but when they hit they were incredible but the reason thing

used callers that was andrew go ahead andrew what's up jesse fight super duper vude VC. First time in a long time. Got a question. What's up? If you had to write your own warning label that people would read every time you met somebody, it would be like a sign or like a badge or something. What would it be? Beep! Please record your message. Beep.

So, KFC. I got a question for you. You had to write your own warning that people read every time you met someone. What would it be? Beep. Please record your message so kfc i've got a question for you guys if you had to write your own warning

that people would read every time they met you well dude you called into evening yak i've been fucking with you the whole time it's Cat. I've been doing the beep sound the whole time. It's Big Cat. I'll answer your question, though. You're live on the radio right now. I was going, beep. Please read your message. That guy didn't give a fuck at all.

Yeah, there were good callers, for sure. That was such a fucking legendary guy. Who was our other memorable caller? There was a few Reason Wait reason? Well when we did the guess of candy That was an all time

That moment was Yeah that was good We just We Titus And I don't know if you remember fights We just did an episode where Guess what candy we're eating

And so Cause we weren't a visual show yet And we were just Chewing candy Chomping And we were getting so mad at people. Yeah, people were calling in and guessing, and they were just wrong. They would call and be like, Rollo?

We'd be like, no, fuck you. Oh, fuck, dude. Yeah, we should maybe do. We might be. We might be. The answer is a reason, Candy. Yeah! We might have to do guess the candy again. That was after like an hour?

Yeah, we were an hour just eating all types of candy. Oh, yeah, so long. Yeah, we should do a Guess That Candy again. I don't know how we could just have one seat be off camera. Just chew into it. Oh man. Alright, so maybe we'll think about it. Maybe we'll think once a month.

If I did Guess That Candy, it would be a nightmare. When I chew candy in particular. How is it a nightmare fight? Tell us. Go on. I have a fucked up jaw. And it's like sitting next to a typewriter. Oh, it's like clicking? I don't like that.

Let's go get some candy. Oh! Oh! Have you gotten that? Have you asked about that? When I was like a kid I did and they were like, you're fine. And I was like, alright. Wait, do it again? That sounds like it hurts.

That's what is in my head all day, every day. Oh my god. Does it hurt? When I yell, does it hurt? No. But it feels very off kilter. What was the candy thing that za said remember when we did got a long crunch yeah it's got a long crunch oh that was the best it was a kick cat description he was like it's a crunch it's a long crunch

the bully from the show doug called in one day on KB's birthday that I liked a lot. What was his name? Roger Klotz? Roger Klotz called in on KB's birthday. Like the voice actor or someone doing his voice? I think it was just him. From Bluffington. We had a call from Bluffington.

And it was for KB's birthday. It sounded just like him. We might have to bring back callers every now and then because it is true like there was times when they weren't great to be weak stretches but what made them not great boring questions yeah boring questions like are just trying too hard or like trying to troll and but it didn't yeah really play a few sl. We have a call from Roger in Bluffington. Hey, what's up, Rog? Hey, what's up, turd nuggets? Wait, Nick, we met him.

Yeah, we ended up on his boat in Lake Erie. Ryan, yeah. Forgot about that. ended up on his boat in Lake Erie. Ryan, yeah. Forgot about that. We were in the middle of Lake Erie. This guy turned around. He's like, by the way, I was Roger Klotz. Yeah. No rules.

Remember how bad that mural was? Yeah, we went mural crazy. Yeah, we really did. Was that the same studio you did the yak before here? Yeah. That was the one. Yeah, they then took away the that same room yeah that was the

Sirius room Sirius took their desk they took their desk yeah they really yeah that was weird they were just like we want our desk back they took everything

yeah they took the chairs wait Sirius took the desk yeah no shit I didn't know that I think we got rid of it I didn't realize

Sirius took it that's why there was always just like a huge box in the middle of that room at the end yeah yeah yeah it's because like all the wires were built through the floor to come in through the desk so. That's why there was always just like a huge box in the middle of that room at the end. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because all the wires were built through the floor to come in through the desk. So when there's no desk, there's just wires in the middle of the floor.

Oh. I never questioned that. Nope. It was just our wire box. Yeah. We almost got hurt on that a couple times wrestling over it. Everyone's got a wire box. Mm-hmm.

Your wrestling match should be here soon, KB. Apparently, they take like 10 months. Oh, what? Furniture, yeah. It's's a couch That's what Paige said I bought my yeah I bought my no I think she said it's about to Come yeah

You bought your Couch from a wrestling mat company same material Same stuff that's what's taking so long For me to that actually would be kind of comfortable Couch made out of wrestling mat I thought don't kind of stick to it don't you Oh yeah I guess you do. Oh yeah, it's,

no. Okay. You just gotta smell. You get so much skin disease. Why didn't they, have they tried to make one better? Like the mat? Yeah.

Like a scientist? I think it's still the, it's just hard to clean it fully. It's the active, I don't think it's the surface. It's the skin on the mat. God. You have variable surfaces, like you have home court advantage where, you're immune's the skin on the mat. You have variable surfaces.

You have home court advantage. You're immune to the disease on it. You guys wrestle on gravel or something. It's like, oh shit, we gotta go to Bluffington High School tonight. They wrestle on gravel. There's no rough mats. Like, oh, this is bad.

There's definitely some, but it wasn't a home thing. Did you ever get MRSA? MRSA scare, but... Isn't that like deathly? I think some wrestlers have died from it. It's crazy. I would have rather have died from MRSA than get the herpes on my face. What?

That's a thing? You still haven't shown me the picture. I've seen it. You've only shown Big Cat. Or you should have. I saw it. Who got herpes on their face young battle mouth was closed a few times it's like a pot i would say probably 20 percent of like in his 40 percent of college wrestlers get herpes gladatorium cool name very cool that's non-sexually transmitted but what does it matter no no better to get it

you can get it wherever on your body you get on your penis arm no i didn't get it no one got it on their dick that would be too cool yeah but so we can decide by we i mean science can kill that kind of herpes but not regular herpes it's the the same thing. Same treatment. But you said you've gotten it. Yeah. So how'd you get rid of it? I haven't had an outbreak in 12 years. Oh, so you're still herpes positive. I technically have it, yeah.

Oh, that's... I know. And people believe you when you say you got it from... Like, I believe you, but I'm talking about partners. Dude, I got it on my scalp. Ugh! Gross! Yeah. Sorry, that's added on my scalp. Ugh. Gross. Yeah. Sorry, that's my high school college wrestling herpes.

Put that one in my back pocket. I was a wrestler. I'm going to go get cauliflower ears so it's more believable. Yeah, I was a wrestler. I've tried seriously telling people in the past, and they just laughed. They didn't believe me. Yeah, it's pretty outrageous. Sorry, I got a wrestling mat.

You start taking your clothes off, you're in a singlet. You have to fuck in a swim cap. TJ, someone tweeted me Scott penis. I can't remember that his wife or girlfriend was in jail oh that's right it was about shitting in the shower though right

I can't remember it now he was like is it okay if I shit in the shower my girlfriend's not home she's in jail she's in jail yeah she is Stallone's a big shower shitter I forgot about Scott penis when you big shower shitter. Remember that? I forgot about Scott. When you say shower shitter, you mean directly into the drain?

Wait, who is? Stallone. Remember there was that internet rumor about him? That's so funny. That Stallone would take a dump in every... That's an amazing rumor. Every hospital, hotel tub, he'd take a dump. Fucking stomping out. what an alpha move do a waffle stomp

then we had to stop talking about that because Che called him we were going to try to free his wife oh yeah but apparently she did something where she shouldn't have been free yeah that's right Because Che called him. We were going to try to free his wife. Oh, yeah. But apparently she did something where she shouldn't have been free. Yeah, that's right. Oh, fuck.

We were on our justice camp. Yeah. We were going to do free Scott Penyes shirts. Yeah. Right? Yeah. Correct, yeah. Can you find the first Scott Penyes? Yes. I forget what the exact thing was, but, yeah, we you find the first Scott Penas? Yes.

I forget what the exact thing was, but, yeah, we couldn't proceed with that. Yeah, we were doing, like, a free Mumia. From what I recall, they – Is he ever free? Mumia, whatever the guy. Who's that? It was a guy in, like, Philly who got arrested unfairly. It was like Rage Against the Machine talked about it a lot.

It was, like, 20 years ago. You're talking about Big Dom? No. He got kicked about Big Dom? No. That kicked off the field? Maybe this is a situation I don't remember things correctly. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know either.

I feel like I was right, but I don't know. You definitely could be. Rage Against the Machine, I feel like, did something. They're always up to something. They broke up. Did they? I think so recently. Really did something. They're always up to something. They broke up. Did they? I think so recently. Really?

Yeah. Why? I don't know. I was a big Rage Against the Machine fan as a kid. I was too. Then I grew out of it. What do you mean? I grew out of it.

You didn't grow out of Rage Against the Machine. You didn't grow into it. No, those guys are like, they're fucking awesome. Grow up. Shit. Yeah. All right, I don't like rage anymore there we go a band like that though like why wouldn't you do you know there's no one sit down and be like hey we make so much money like let's just stay together yeah and like i think they became the machine oh that's a problem yeah weren't they big uh Didn't they push the Vax real hard? Oh, I don't know. Yeah.

Amarello, he's the guitarist? Yeah. I believe he's a big Vax guy, yeah. Which, whatever, but that is becoming the machine a little bit. That's not really raging. Yeah. No. Yeah, you get Latin American flags on fire to that as an interesting transition.

Hmm. Moomy is still in jail. Damn. Damn. What did- Hmm The mumia is still in jail Damn Damn Who What did It was a guy in Philadelphia Who was arrested in Political activists and journalists

Who was convicted of murder And sentenced to death in 1982 For the 1981 murder of Philadelphia police officer Daniel Faulkner Okay well that seems Yeah I just I think it was a rage Yeah

Free mumia That's what we're gonna do for Scott Panis Oh I thought you guys had taken up the mumia No Okay No no no I think it was a rage, yeah, pre-mumia. That's what we're going to do for Scott Penis. Oh, I thought you guys had taken up the mumia. No. Okay. No, no, no. Scott Penis. I'm not getting political.

I was like, I missed that. Thank you for clearing that. How about Penis' girlfriend? How do we get his last name to be Penis? I think that's his name. His name is Scott Penis? No. We made that up.

Oh. Penis with the square. Oh. Yeah. A tilde. A tilde, yeah. Penis with the square. Oh. Yeah. A tilde. A tilde. Penis. Scott Penis.

Yeah. Ohio? I don't know. Yeah. Cincinnati? Yeah, Cincinnati. Huh. Scott Penis.

Yeah. Yeah, his girlfriend was in jail. What was her name? Rox. My old lady's in jail. I'd be terrified if my girlfriend came home from prison. Yeah, right? No matter what.

Yeah. Yeah. New tag. Terrified of what? Terrified of everything. There's a new pants wearer in the household. Whoever's got time wears pants. Yeah, hard time.

Your girlfriend does hard time. Would you stay with your girlfriend? I could see you dating a prison woman. Like, I could see you falling in love with a girl that's currently in prison. Yeah, because I like a long distance. I don't want to be alone. So if I could – actually, you're kind of spinning a pretty good tale. What's that mugshot baddies?

Mugshot baddies? Mugshotties? Yeah, but that's all, like, you know, they got in a fight. I want someone who's doing hard time for a long time. Who's not coming out. Yeah. They're all out the next day. You hear all the stories of the women that are right to serial killers, but it's never

men doing that to the women, like the violent women criminals, you know? Yeah. Yeah. I can't say. Do hot women do prison time? Yeah. Who is Jodi Arias? Two counts of robbery.

I believe Jodi Arias. I think it was her. Someone got sentenced to like 10 years or 15 years. A long time, but not a lifetime. Wait, does she have a Pornhub necklace? Is that a Pornhub lanyard? Yes. Is it? No, it's Pino TV?

What did she do? Pornhub? You spotted that logo quick. Mischief is cute. I know that logo. Mischief is. It's like Google or Nike. Whoa.

Reckless driving, serious body language. That's what he said. What's the deal with that girl who just got out of jail that has the Netflix thing about her? Oh. Gypsy Rose. Yeah, what is it? I learned all about Gypsy Rose. Can you tell me?

Abridged? What is it? Munchausen's by proxy. Yeah. What? So are you going to need to go more? Yeah. You didn't listen to Eminem? Make the bridge tighter. Munchausen's by proxy. What? So you're going to need to go more. You didn't listen to Eminem?

Make the bridge tighter. Munchausen's by proxy. Munchausen's is you fake a disease for sympathy. Munchausen's by proxy is her mom was faking her diseases for sympathy. She got a house built habitat for humanity, this, that. She got a boyfriend online behind her mom's back. Victor the vampire. He came over and cut off the mom's head.

Oh, that's a plot twist. and so she and him went to jail he's in jail still she got married to another man while in jail and now she's out why did she get out she didn't do the killing she just plotted she that feels like she should be in jail she was in jail for a while i think gypsy should have never gone the popular opinion is that the mom very much deserved it. Yeah, she was a victim. She had her in a wheelchair. He thought of her mouth. In hospitals. Okay.

There's a documentary about it. It's a great documentary. She was at the AEW show. Is it on Netflix? Mommy, Dad, and Deer. Was she really? Excellent. Mommy, Dad, and Deer.

All right, so I'll say yes. She should be out of jail. How do we come up with that title? Yeah, Mommy, Dad, and Deer. That we come up with that title? Yeah, Mommy Dead. Wild title. That's so wild. Okay. I saw a tweet yesterday that was like a viral tweet that was some reporter who said,

I just interviewed someone, a child of a mommy blogger. And just so you guys all know, you're not ready for the stories that will come out in the next 10 years. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, dude. Nuts. Dude. Anytime I see that where like people are on like they have an entire Instagram where they don't really have a job and their entire job is to just show their kids. Yeah.

Something's amiss. Like those kids are going to like imagine like growing up and be like, oh, yeah, I just my mom was just videotaping me every single day I think one of the one of the quotes I read from it was like I knew at a very young age I was just a vehicle for my mother's internet likes oh those kids are starting to be adults now yeah oh that's crazy she interviewed an adult

it's insane damn yeah there's gonna be some fucked up kids yeah some real fucked up kids Yeah Some real fucked up kids Should we have Mikey Pavs and Owen do it too? Definitely Yeah all three

Have you seen Owen's volume on his hair today? No Nobody's got it like him Nobody's got it like him Nobody? Nobody's got it like him Nobody? It's tall

It's We should bet on the times Mikey Pavs is a good athlete Nobody? Nobody's got it like him. Nobody? It's tall. It's... We should bet on the times. Mikey Paz is a good athlete. Didn't he play college hoops? Played college hoops. Damn, didn't know that. Oh, I didn't know that.

What is the... I can't really see the TV over here. So what is the last leg? Sporkle. But you just get 10 total? 10 total. 10 total, okay. Random trivia.

We'll have you on Brandon's seat so you can see the table. Okay. We help people to get them to the right spot, depending on how good their time is. But it's also not helpful at all because we're just – Yeah, that's true. We're trying to help, but we're all screaming a different category. Yeah, maybe we should stop.

Yeah, maybe we should. Let someone just do it. Because I have no idea of half these people's interests yeah you're right come on the three and i do notice like the more we talk it does confuse them i am very lucky that uh yesterday it seems like it probably won't come up twice in a row but yesterday we got the elements out of the way yeah but there's always one category that's easy like there's like one that would be like name the eight teams in the nhl that are in canada okay you know what i mean they're like name the four nfc west teams there's always a layup one you could always probably get five pretty pretty quickly yeah yesterday was like the the states that border the mississippi river

yeah that was a bad miss by morrow name all the all the, like, we live in one. We live in one. Yeah, just go down the list. Go down the middle of the country. Yeah. Yeah, you're right, though. I was yelling at Morrow, like, something about Pokemon, just assuming he knew Pokemon. Yeah. That's a safe bet.

Well, I was yelling about Elements, and someone else was yelling. All right, so we'll stop doing that. That was, I was very quiet during the Elements elements because it was just like, H, C. And I was like, I don't fucking know any of these. None of them. On the dozen, whenever on the daily dozen, pretty often there's an element one. I'm always like, not getting that today.

I carry around a periodic table with me. Do you really? Mm-hmm. Always in my wallet. Let's see it. Okay. My chemist homie Pat gave it to me i can't the one with a big nut whoa there it is you look at it often no no no no no no no it's just a token of pat's coming back if you guys want to see his nut yeah i'd love to i missed it the first time i don't i've ever seen it either i, yeah. I've definitely haven't seen it live in person.

Maybe I've seen a picture of it. I think, yeah, maybe. The picture does not do it. You've never seen it? Nobody in this room has seen my buddy's nut. I'd love to. I had my buddy Sweet Potato Pat come on, and he has one giant fucking nut,

and we had him show people on the act. I want to see it. Very badly. Is it bigger? Is that something that keeps growing? I haven't asked. Good question. Because that was like two years ago.

He got married and had a kid. I don't know what that would empty that out. Yeah, maybe the kid. Maybe that was the kid. The kid's massive. Wait, maybe he was pregnant. Yeah, I think he was. In the nuts.

I don't know. Nut pregnant. I'd imagine it's still big. Imagine having a kid out your nuts. I should ask him. Nut pregnant. I'd imagine it's still big. Imagine having to kid out your nuts. I should ask him. Yeah, has it gotten bigger or smaller? I'll call him. Like out your pee hole or out your nut?

I guess it would grow in your nut, and then you'd have to piss it out like a kidney stone. Yeah. I believe Jacob Elordi does that in a movie. He does what? Births out of his dick. I think that was one of his earliest acting roles. He's in multiple movies that have wild scenes like that? He does what? Births out of his dick. I think that was one of his earliest acting roles.

He's in multiple movies that have wild scenes like that? Yeah, there's a movie where he comes out of baby, or put babies out of his dick. I don't know what the right verb to use is. Nice. Births, like a seahorse, male seahorse. I don't even know who this person is. Jacob what?

You don't know Jacob Elordi? I have no idea who that is. I'm so bad with... He's number one hottest in the street. Hollywood name. He's in Saltburn. He's high. Australian. Still hot.

He has a negative carthel tilt. But Nana's hot. Jake. That's a bad one. That's a bad one. All the far right. 6'5". That's a little –

What is he in? Saltburn, Euphoria. Oh, Euphoria. I watched the first season. I'll tell you this. I've never seen pictures of him. Saltburn was thephoria. Oh, Euphoria I watched the first season. I'll tell you this. I've never seen pictures of him. Saltburn was the first thing I ever saw him in. The photos don't do it justice.

He's a very handsome man. Yeah, you got to see how he carries himself. Yeah. Fights, you haven't watched Euphoria? No, I wouldn't care for Euphoria. Look how tall. Really? Whoa.

He is a tall boy. And he's dating Lori Loughlin's liar of a daughter. Oh, is he? Yeah. The USC chick. Great rower. Yeah. All-American level, I think.

That whole scandal ruled. Yeah. It was great. It was awesome. I feel like Lori Loughlin took all the ire, and William H. Macy's wife, whose name I forget, she also went to jail. Yeah. Felicity Huffman?

How long did Lori Loughlin go to jail for? Not long. Not long. That's not really it. I mean, it was one of those crimes. I remember I watched the documentary and I was like, wait, aren't they going to say anything about the actual schools? Right. The schools are all so complicit in this that they're charging so much and it's so competitive.

It's an education system, not. There was a story yesterday or two days ago that, like, there are these New York City clubs where parents. I saw that. $200,000 to get their kids into Ivy's or whatever. I was like, don't the other students want that too? Like, that's why you go to the Ivy's, to get into that family circle. Right.

Right. That's the whole point. Like, I watched, yeah, that whole documentary. I was like, this is just parents that will do anything for their kids the documentary should be like the u.s school system is fucked up right because if they didn't do it somebody else would right and it's like isn't it more of a problem that we basically are like no one's getting an education they're just trying to get into social clubs yeah that's that's what they are like oh yeah what if harvard just only let in the best kids it It's a bunch of poor, smart kids.

Right. Who cares about Harvard anymore? Right. Look at us. Fixed it. Fixed. We fixed it by encouraging the- I think we're Bernie Bros right now.

Is that what- I think we accidentally just became Bernie Bros. Uh-oh. Yeah, like to fuck the school system. It should just be free, and it should just be like you actually learn things I like the free Yeah I saw a TikTok the other day about a guy who didn't go to school

And he just builds stuff and I was like fuck yeah bro Yeah That's what I want I respect you I don't want to put in the work to find out how to build stuff But he was just like yeah I don't do anything And I just hang out out here in the woods by myself I was like this dude's the best.

He's living life. He's making TikToks. They went and got a phone. Yeah. Remember that dude in Maine that they caught a few years ago? Squatting and everything. Robbing, huh? Yeah, he lived in the woods for like 20 years.

No, I'd miss that. Yeah. And the people were like, chill with it. They were like, yeah, you can come in and steal my shit. Yeah, he'd steal like food and stuff. And he lived in the woods for legitimately 20 years through the winter and everything. And then they finally caught him. Are you legally allowed to do that?

Like if I went to the woods, can I just live there? I think so. No? I think he got arrested because he stole. But yeah, why can't you? Is there public land where you can just live on alaska yeah that's oh yeah that sounds right that sounds right you just using forests as residents okay living in the woods is illegal

living the wilderness so long as it's not someone else's private property oh okay so you can you can live on american home dude raleigh north carolina everyone's homeless in the woods can you look up that main guy i don't remember how long he lived in there but he was like a whole camp and yeah the people like it was like on a nice lake and people were just like, yeah, this guy just steals from us like once a year. Whatever it is. I bet that. What would he steal? Food or 27 years?

Wow. Legend parked his car and he just walked away and they just that's dude. This guy's the best. The best. He never talked to people. Yeah, like, they were worried when they arrested him, like, he's going to get sick and, like, die because he doesn't have any immunities. Like those people, that island. Yeah, where they have to kill you if you get close.

Yeah. Dude, I'd leave a note on my card. Don't look for me. Yeah. Just leave. 27 years. What are you doing? Give him Brandon Reese's eggs. That's the third one. For good. 27 years. What are you doing? Give him Brandon Reese's eggs.

It's the third one. For good behavior. Mini. Three equals one. Did you use the potty today? Hmm? Did you use the potty today? No.

Oh. You haven't pottied? He just, he's just giving me eggs. Have you pottied? Yeah, early this morning. Okay, so then you get an egg. Thank you, Kyle. Good job, Brandon.

The first one he threw, it hit me right here and it slid down my chest. And that was just such a happy little treat to look down and see. That's nice. So thank you. You're welcome. Your body's built to get hit by Reese's.

It lands right where you want them. You've evolved to that point. Evolution. You have a Reese's. It lands right where you want them. You've evolved to that point. Evolution. You have a Reese's gutter down your gut. Right there. Move Goldberg. Yeah, yeah. Some people have fuck gutters, Brandon.

There's a Reese's gutter. There's a Reese's one big gorge. A fuck gutter is so vulgar. What is a fuck gutter? It's like when you have the V. Regular people call him a V. That's my fuck gutter. I had a buddy with him, and he was real vulgar about it.

He's like, she loves my fuck gutters. It's like, what is that? Bet he couldn't make her laugh, though. No. Big Cat, I have to clarify, Nerdy Gallo is actually unemployed right now. Oh. Just had to do him justice.

So he is looking for a job. We just hired Ohio State, so. Oh, shit. Let's fire Malasek. Oh, yeah, we'll have to fire someone else. Fire Malasek twice. Malasek does graphics, right? Does anybody know what Malasek's job is?

Nope. I mean, that guy should send someone an email. He's very talented. Yeah. Do you know who's the best email, you think? You're just saying somebody. Probably Big Cat. Maybe Hank.

Okay. I don't know what we're looking for, but someone that talented. I'm sure he has a... Quiggs is like our most important person here. Yeah. Got it. Hmm. All right, so we're just giving people jobs.

Let's do it. I don't know. People who deserve them. Yeah, well, yeah. Yeah. I don't know if we have the, I don't know if we're trying to hire. Right. That was incredible.

I mean, definitely keep his portfolio somewhere. Yeah. Yeah. Keep that portfolio popping. All right, should we do some gauntlet? What's the matter, Brandon? Is that a bad Reese's? Bad egg?

No, it's just you have three in a row without water, it begins to thicken. It begins to thicken up. I figured that would happen. That's why I brought three. Third one was a chore to get down, but it's down. You did it. I'm proud of you. Fuck gutter.

Your throat's your you gutter your throats your gutter uh yeah why don't you do the other two ads and let's let's do some gauntlet yeah yeah yeah ladies and gentlemen high noon sip on summer flavors in the middle of winter introducing the all-new high noon snowbird pack featuring the perfect mix of winter and summer flavors the eight pack includes two new flavors, raspberry and plum alongside high noon classics, peach and lemon all made with real vodka and real juice. The snowbird pack is a winter exclusive. So get it before the ice melts.

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IHateStevenSinger.com Gauntlet time. Alright, so the gauntlet is? Bags. Soccer. Wiffle ball, football, basketball, basketball, sparkle. Would the second basketball both threes? Mm-hmm.

Okay. Where's Mikey Paz and Owen? Let's get them here, too. I'll grab them. Okay. Do you want to have Mikey Paz or and go first so you can see him? You got it. You could know what to beat. You could know what to beat. There's that fucking food processor. 45 minutes is up buddy. He gave us a 45 minute warning.

Jerry Jerry we getting caught soon? Okay. Now? Do you look what? No. No, you don't look fat. Great.

I think I got a fucked up mirror at my house. You got a fucked up mirror. You have a circus mirror in your house? Wait, yeah. I've never... Do you wear jeans often? No, I never wear jeans. Okay. Right.

Client jeans. Dressed up. Client jeans. Yeah. Perfect. Thank you. You're cut. I'm going mullet.

Are you? Fuck yeah, dude. Like, not a full mullet, but just, like, off the sides a little. You're going mullet? I think so, yeah. A red mullet. The Jersey Jerry. I'm just going to do it. Modern mullet but just like off the sides you're going mullet i think so a red mullet the jersey jerry i'm just gonna do it you're doing the jersey jerry yeah i figured why not and if it doesn't work out i'm just gonna shave all my hair off i uh i've been wanting to do that for a while i've been wanting i wanted to try mullet but i think i want to go rat tail i've always said it i've said it for years like you could make it

work rat tail two clay beads. Like Matty Mathewson? I was going to say, Matty's kind of got the rat tail on lock right now. Wait, does he have beads in it? No, he has like a thick tail. No, I don't want a thick tail. I want a thin one that'll curl up, and I want to have two beads at the top. Just two? Yeah.

What colors? Like a traditional clay brown and like a dark red. All right. I can see that. I can see you pulling that off. Thanks, man. No, you go first. Look at the volume on Owen.

Pavs ruined it. Volumeless Pavs. Owen, look at that volume. Unreal. Insane. He's playing. He's playing. He's playing.

Volume. Mikey Pats, you going to go first? He's happy. I am happy. So sit here when you're ready for Sporkle. Gotcha. Cool. Okay.

All right, let us know when we're ready to go, TJ. Ready. All right. He's got this. That was going to do good. All right. We ready? All right.

Ready, set, go. All right, here he goes. Oh. Oh, shit. Oh, he's in the S, set, go. All right, here he goes. Oh, shit. Oh, he's in the Sambas, too. Oh. Oh. Oh. Alisek.

Alisek's back. Alisek's back. Alisek's back. Oh. Oh. All right. The boy is back. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. back He's gone full dickhead. Yes.

I love it. No! My pal's got the yips. I love seeing my boy back. Oh, this is awesome. Oh, yeah. What an asshole. He's so back.

Oh! Oh! Oh, that is. Great job, Jake. Oh, gone? Uh-oh. That's good. Oh, my word.

Nope. Oh. I don't know if Pabst is gassed or demoralized i think he's gassed that like mentally fucks you up yeah getting no no no no no you gotta hit it no rebound minute 35 oh dude that was vintage maliceison. Yeah, you had to fire him. He didn't have to worry about anything else. He didn't have to worry about the job anymore. Now he's just a goalie, yeah. Oh, no. This is the demoralizing part. Would you rather be someone like Pavs where you can tell he kind of has some ability

or someone like Mauro where it's like somehow just happening? No, it's the worst for Pavs. Yes. Yeah. He's an athlete and he's having a very tough go of it. Oh, that's bad. College ball where? Oh, no.

Where'd he play college ball? Oh, SUNY. Okay. Is that Division I? No, I think it was II. II, Division II. Well, they have a bunch of schools. Oh. He didn't bring the rack with you, dude.

It's on wheels. Stop bringing the rack. Yeah, that's insane. Bring the fucking rack. He's cocky. He's cocky. And now he's going to make this one. There it is.

In here, in here. Trivia, trivia. No paths. All right. All right. We want to try to help him or no? Yeah, just tell him. Nine NBA teams named after animals.

Bulls, Hawks, Hornets. Jesus Christ. Six lead actresses in the following movies. Notebook, True Lies, Blindside. Two U.S. states that don't observe daylight savings. Eight kids' names in Rugrats. One host of Watch What Happens Live. Bravo.

Come on. What's the host's name? Eleven types of vinegar. This would be Feidelberg's. Yeah, I would crush this. Six performers. You don't know who the star of the notebook is? Are you giving up? Female. Rachel McAdams. Yeah. What's going on? You don't know who hosts

Watch What Happens Live? I can name any of these. Okay, gotcha. Yeah. La La Land. Kids from Rugrats. Here we go. What was that? He's too young for Rugrats. Emma Stone.

There you go. Blindside. True Eyes Blindside. Sandra Bullock. Yep. There we go. I have no clue. You can think more NBA teams

You just gotta think about it Eleven types of vinegar Balsamic Fuck yeah Yeah Red wine Yeah Um

I don't know a single rug rat I'll be honest Okay Dungeons and Dragons Okay Okay numbers On the sides of seven dice For Dungeons and Dragons

Two US states Don't observe daylight savings? He's got to get into the NBA. Travis Scott. Oh, I know. Snoop Dogg. Eminem. Yeah. There we go.

Alright. You don't know Andy Cohen? I thought, so I was a little confused. I thought that I had to finish the NBA team. Oh. So I was stuck on NBA teams. Yeah,

it looked like you had given up for a second. Yeah. All right, Owen, pretty easy to beat that one. All right, come on,

Owen, good job. Jake came alive. Yeah, Jake, we haven't, Malasek has not, he's not looked that good

in two months. I couldn't tell if you were dejected or just tired when you were after that. Yeah did you beat mincy you beat mincy you beat cam newton you beat cam newton yeah cam really did everyone a favor by just the best so everyone's like when they suck we're just like but you beat you became That is a nice little Oh fuck yeah that guy Alright hold on one sec

Tell me when TJ Brandon I like the graveyard of Reese's over here That's fucking nice You were feeding him to him like a horse. Good. All right. Ready, set, go. All right. I'm right in the back.

Taking his time. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, he's rapid firing. There we no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, he's rapid firing. There it is. Oh. Oh.

He's getting swaggy with it. Oh, no. Oh, that didn't go. Oh, it worked. Oh, shut down. I knew he had it. Oh, no. Baseball, baseball, no. Oh, that didn't go. Oh! Shut down. I knew he had it. Oh, no. Baseball, baseball, baseball.

Brandon, what are you doing? There we go. There it is. Brandon somehow got distracted from his only job. Brandon, that's, yeah. Nope. You got to get it yourself. How does he look so cool doing that?

Yeah, he's got it. He's got it down. He's pulling fur. Why is he going so far? The soccer ball going that far was awesome. He's kind of giving up. Fights. You got to fight more than Owen Mike has.

Yeah, they've been giving up. There it is. Shot. I'm going to start stretching now. There's Elon. I can't tell if... Take the rack. Oh! Oh!

Oh! Man, his face. Oh. There it is. Good pace. Yeah, I don't know It's like somehow You've only been two minutes Okay

Five types of Smash Brothers games Don't play video games Fuck Eight players to score The most points In a Laker uniform Kobe

Yup Shaq Magic Yup Yup Yup Kareem Abdul Jabbar Kobe. Yep. Shaq. Magic. Yep. Yep. Yep. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Jesus Christ, I need to take my health seriously.

Oh, fuck. What's a Pillsbury mascot? The Doughboy. Chick-fil-A's mascot. I actually don't know. Fuck. A cow called Chicken. Spelled wrong. Yep. That's right. Yep. The Doughboy Chick-fil-A's mascot I actually don't know Fuck A cow called chicken Spelt wrong

Yep That's right Caramel Sigs Cheetos Seven numbers and craps Chester McBadbat Oh seven numbers to win on field bet and craps

I don't know that Aflac One British cue sport played with 22 ball on a billiard table oh five not names of smash bros games not a video gamer oh yeah that's right shit it's in happiest countries oh okay switzerland that seems good that seems good. Sweden. Nice. Norway. Hell yeah. Denmark.

Probably. Oh, my God. Oh. Yep. Wow. Oh. You got it. Australia, New Zealand, Iceland, Finland. Okay.

I thought Japan would be in there for sure. They work at their desks until they die. Those are happy whites, bottom left. Yeah. Yeah. Good job, Owen. Great job. Yeah, you did. Yeah. Thank you. Great soccer strategy.

Yeah, that was, I don't know what was happening, but I liked it. A lot. Alright, fights. This is big time. He's got the shirt tucked. I'm not touching him. You know what I thought you were going to do?

Pick up all the bags and just throw them. All right. Well, we should have Fasoli run it one day. Oh, yeah. He's up to do today. Has he not? Yes. I want to see him fail miserably.

You're up next, Fasoli. You're up next. All right. He stays here at night and practices this, I want to see him fail miserably. You're up next, Fasoli. You're up next. He stays here at night and practices this, I'm pretty sure. No. No, I'm making that up. Vidalberg called himself fat? Yeah. What an asshole.

Yeah. I'm ready. All right. Ready? Set. Go, all right ready set go It's over That's a wrap. That's a wrap. Oh

Didn't he invent Saturdays are for the boys. Oh, that's the that's the cornhole motto credo. No Peyton the sides No That's the cornhole motto. Credo. Oh, no. Peyton the sides. No. How is there confusion about this is the one you shouldn't have? Yeah, this is it. Is that good? Am I good to go now? Oh, no.

Johnny. Oh, no. Oh, no, John. Oh, no. Last bag. Is he out of bags? Oh, he's got to grab more bags. Not more bags of bag? Oh, he's gonna grab more bags! Not more bags! Oh man

That is brutal. Oh, this is brutal Johnny All right All right Malisak Oh Easy dude, he's so bad Light work. Nice. even close. Oh my god Oh no

Fuck Oh fight, but he tried oh yeah, but over the middle Go Oh fight! What's he trying to- Ball! You have one over the middle? Go! Yeah! I feel like... It's like, nice seeing Malasek go. Oh! Oh! Dang it! It's- it's nice having Malasek be back.

Yeah. Yes, great. Oh yeah. The challenge is- It makes it so much better, being like, Oh, I gotta go against Malasek. There should be like a- like a steroid era. Yeah. Malasek got to go against Malasek. There should be like a steroid era. Malasek dickhead versus Malasek lost his fastball.

Nice throw, John. Nice. John looked good throwing. That did look nice. This might be bad. He has not made a shot since he's been here. Oh, that didn't move. There we go.

John, you got a good time cooking. You got a good time cooking. Has cornhole ever been somebody's worst time? Seriously. Uh-oh. Oh, no. I need to readjust. There it is. Yes, let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Under Seriously. Uh-oh. Oh, no. I need to readjust. There it is.

Yes, let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go. Under three, under three. Three is getting heavy. Eleven longest running Nickelodeon shows. Team Thrill played four. Niners, Eagles. Oh, nice. Cowboys.

Longest running Owners Seven rappers in two units Tony Ayo 50 Lloyd Banks What did you say? Owners

Majority owners of teams Dallas Cowboys Jerry Jones Knicks James Dolan Colts Jim Irsay Mets

Steve Cohen There we go James Nolan. Colts. Jim Irsay. Mets. Steve Cohen. There we go. That was great. That was a sick run, John. Great work. And one-third of that was Cornhole. Yeah.

Cornhole might have been your worst. That was bad. Who crushed that? Became Newton. Oh, yeah. Killed him. He might that? Beat Cam Newton. Oh, yeah. Killed him. He might have halved his time. Is Stu still the worst?

Yeah. Forget Cam Newton. You beat White Sox Dave. Legendary. Legendary athlete, White Sox Dave. That was a great run. Is everyone usually this gas? Yeah.

Oh, yeah. I almost had to go home with my chest. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. What? What's going on? Is he stretching? Why are you confused?

All right. Show it to the people at home. There he is. Fasoli. Turn is. Fasoli. Turn around, Fasoli. I'm surprised he doesn't have Dave's face tattooed somewhere. Is that coming next? I love him.

Why did he do that? Why did he do it? Fasoli still gets laid. He's got a girlfriend. When we went to New York, he stayed at his girlfriend's place in New Jersey. The next day, I day I was like how was the sex he just gave me the best fasoli salad just doing my job all right you ready TJ Just do it, my dear. All right. You ready, TJ? Shirtless division. All right, here we go.

Fuck me. Three, two, one, go. John, you were bad at the bags. Dude, I'm a singles guy with bags. Even when I'm playing, I just try and get on. Yeah. Fasoli might be worse. If Fasoli does bad, he might kill himself. Oh, Fasoli's missing the board. Fasoli might be worse. If Fasoli does bad, he might kill himself.

Oh, Fasoli's missing the board. Fasoli. There it is. There it is. He's got to get to Sporkle, which is... Oh, yeah. I forgot Fasoli can't read. I need Malicex POV right now.

Fasoli charging. Oh, whoa, whoa. That's not very Viva of you. Oh, boy. This might be of you. Oh, boy. This might be the one. Oh! Malasek! The soccer, every time I kick the ball,

that's going in. Yeah, because it seems so easy. There it is. Filthy shot. Alright. Big swing coming he's got a nice swing there it is alright

oh we need more get some more up there yup minute seven Fasoli little high I think the knee down method that Shane that's it is the way to go yeah everybody goes high it is a weird angle this looks like it would be the easiest there it is all right He's doing good Wet

There it is He actually has a great time I know But again, Sporkle Sporkle Let's not help him at all And just let the time run and run and run Yeah, I want to hear his brain

I want 45 minutes. If we're completely silent, we'll hear the mouse in his brain. The rusty cog. Just grasping, wheezing. I hope the clients come back out right now. I do too. Uh-oh. Oh, no.

Oh. You put the finger up. Yeah. Oh. Solely. Good wrist action though. Oh. He's furious with himself.

Oh. Oh. I thought this was going to be me shooting. There. Oh, there we go. Trivia, trivia. Silence, silence. My question.

All these. Oh, I can't read that. I can't read that. My question all these Can't read that because of the size or the combination of letters Five states of most billionaires, Connecticut Put a c in there yeah okay oh miami or florida no california uh wyoming Wyoming. For billionaires? Oh! Wait. Cheap land.

Biggest of apologies. Oh, my God, Fasoli. Chicago. Cheap land. Is that the one? Chicago for billionaires or was it for Blues Brothers? It was for billionaires. It was for billionaires. Massachusetts.

Did I say that already? No. I mean, you're missing a huge one. A huge one. Billionaires. Texas. A huge one. Arizona.

All right. Let's – you got Wyoming. It is per million people. That goes a little bit. It's not Vegas. You could do other categories. Seven cities. I can't read this.

Seven cities. The following TV movies take place. Detroit. Yeah. Parks and Rec is where? SpongeBob. Bikini Bottom. I don't help them anymore.

I like this silence. No, I don't like this. No one's helped me. Parks and Rec. Fuck. Dakota? Is that in? I don't know.

Um, I don't know if soccer at all. That was a guess for Parks and Rec. All right, I'll help you a little. There's 10 Heisman winners in the last 10 years. There's also two Packer QBs to throw for six TDs in one game. Packer QBs. This is terrible, shall we?

Table games in Vegas. Roulette. Okay. Fucking blackjack. Okay. Think right now. Fucking black. Poker.

All right, one more. Baccarat. There you go. That was mean. All right! I didn't like that. Sole right! I didn't like that. It was so weird. I wanted to help so bad.

Wyoming. How the fuck did you get Wyoming? You missed New York. John Dutton. That was impressive. You missed New York. That was really impressive. John Dutton lives in Montana.

I don't know. I think of Wyoming. He also guessed Vegas, Chicago, and Miami. He said Chicago and got it for the Blues. That was impressive, too. He guessed Miami for one of the states as well. Shout out, Dave. Thank you.

Shout out, Dave. Live in the state of Miami. Uh-oh. You've got a gang of people below you. Let's go. Laney, Will, two phones, Brett. Wait, I beat Compton? Yeah.

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Will. I needed you to beat Kyle by a second. I would have been livid. Well, thanks for having me. All right. Thanks, Sully. I'm sweating.

Good shit to Sully. Oh, man. Good shit to Sully. We got to do the other two ads. Can you do the... Do we? Yeah. Do we do Steven's?

I'm going to stay over here. Oh, did we do High Noon? Yeah. Oh, you did them both. I'm an idiot. I remember that. I'm an idiot. That was great.

Fasoli, what a legend. But the big news is Malasek is back. Good job, Malasek. Good job, Jake. Malasek, you're back. Malasek's back. It feels good, right? It feels great.

Time to show off that shirt. Show off the shirt. Get in front of the camera over here. Malasek, talk to you. No. No. Yeah shirt. Show off the shirt. Get in front of the camera over here. No. Yeah, sure. Yeah. All right. Fire.

You guys think we can get Chris Berman to do it tomorrow? Yeah. I don't think so. How old is he? He's older. That'll be tough. Right after Malasek got his mojo back? Would Malasek be a dickhead to Berman? He's going to kill Berman.

He couldn't. No, he'd stop. I think he'd try a little bit for the first three. Yeah. And then after that, it's whatever. Titus, you got to play basketball tomorrow. You know that? Yeah, I'm playing.

All right, cool. I'm playing. Yeah. All right, what else we got got It's been a fun yak I am out tomorrow Then I'll miss you guys all next week Houston Yes

Oh yeah Have fun in Vegas boys Oh yeah Thank you Fights you're here tomorrow I'm here tomorrow Alright And then

You're in Vegas right I'm in Vegas too Fantastic Next week I have one surprise for us in Vegas Already set up. Okay. Is he a mind freak?

Why don't you look at me? Would you describe him as a mind freak? Nope. Then I have no idea. It's a surprise you definitely will not be thinking of. Why are you looking at me? It's probably food-based. It's not because it's a menacing glare

it's not a happy glare why is it menacing? take the menace out of your glare it's worse it's a good surprise 7am mostly sports yikes what do you mean yikes?

we're built for this pick central made you move again? 10 a.m. yak? 10 a.m. yak. I like that. I do too. 10 a.m. yak. Rowan will be there.

I think the Boston boys are going to stop by. I had to step out. I got a phone call confirming our celeb guest on Frank and the Frankettes. No way. We got him. We're still struggling. We're still struggling. We're still struggling. How did Hank's stand up go?

It was great. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He was. He really was. Infuriatingly comfortable up there. Yeah.

Interesting. He's going to be overconfident when it's time. Yeah. It might happen. Oh, yeah. I made contact with a celeb guest that would have ruled, but he couldn't do it. Who is it? Jeopardy James.

Oh, my. Yeah, getting it. Would have been incredible. I offered to pay out of my own pocket for flight and lodging for Pokey Reese, and they couldn't get it. Oh. That's brutal. Yeah, we still need ours for the act.

Excuse me. We're in trouble. Okay. Who do you guys have? PFT and Fran are handling that. I'm hands off on that. Oh, okay. Seems like they both got a better chance.

Sounds like it's their team. Yeah. You're not the captain of your own team? Well, it's not really. You haven't handled a celebrity on your team. Does that mean it's not your team? I actually have. You just said you haven't got him yet.

But we've been trying. He's handling it, though. I try to get James, and then I have a text to someone else. The expert celebrity guest apparently is on tour on the south. In the south, so they're struggling to get a date for him or her. You guys got Larry the Cape guy? I thought you were saying we got mints. You do.

Oh, nice. Are you okay? I don't know what it is. It's the gauntlet. It's the gauntlet. There's probably a lot of hay in the air still. Yeah, for sure. By the way, we've moved the hay around so everyone can just chill out now.

I do like when we fuck up something very obscure and there'll be one or two people who'll be like, I'm a hay expert. What you guys are doing is egregious. That hay was going to be fine out there. But I'm just like, I don't know, dude. They're like, how could you possibly do this? That hay would be fine. How could you not know? No, I don't know, dude. They're like, how could you possibly do this? That hay would be fine. How could you not know?

No, not with the cold. Rats would have loved that. Yeah, I think someone said, like, maybe next time you guys will learn that you should be giving that hay to someone, not just throwing it out. It is shocking when people have life experiences that aren't exactly yours. Yeah. That was fun. Stunning. Damn, you're right.

We are idiots with the hay. Okay, you want to spin the wheel? TJ? The goddamn food processor. It's like really processing some food. Damn. We good. The deal's been good.

So tomorrow I'll be in and out of the act because Berman's coming around the time of the act. But we'll figure it out. Make it work. And we are going to play some pickup basketball with Chris Berman on the call after the act tomorrow. So he wants to play a few holes in the middle. Are you getting a middle finger ready?

That's a doozy of one. Who's it for? Aaron. Okay. Nice. You missed him. Nice. Alright. Thank you everyone. Please subscribe and upvote this. Is it upvote? Thumbs up? Thumbs up the stream.

Thumbs up. Like it. Like it and subscribe. See you tomorrow. Houston Improv this weekend. Outro Music Have a beautiful Thursday, everybody. Shout out to Nerdy Gallo for that video. Super cool. Go follow him.

Go support his stuff. Love you guys. Bye.