The Yak - Jared Leto Dressed Up as Big Cat at the Met Gala | The Yak 5-2-23

Episode Date: May 2, 2023

Oh no! He's stuck in 2D!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Hello. See ya. Welcome in. Presented by Roback. R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com. Use code YAK for 20% off your first purchase on the website. Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. Shorts for the summer. The most comfortable clothes in the world. Rowback.com. Use code YAK for 20% off your first purchase.

I'm going to be traveling tomorrow. I'm going to wear the rowback. For F1, always travel in rowback. For F1? Yeah. Yeah, down in Miami. It's going to be hot. I actually told myself I was going to just try to do like a 72-hour fast before I went,

but I've broken that multiple times, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Start it now. Well, I would start it right now. Yeah, this is real food today. That was good. Do people even drink at F1 events or party? I think so. I think there's a ruckus fan squad,

and then there's the rich people with their champagne flutes. Tass went to an F1 competition. I wish you were here to tell us about it. He'd be regaling us. We don't know what the crowd thought of him. We can't even guess, really. What am I looking at right in front of us? Oh, okay, let's just do it. Let's get right into it.

Help us. Yeah, because we can eat this. Actually, we have to do a natural segue, but unrelated to this, what's your guys' favorite seafood? Oh! It is lobster. Favorite food.

Shrimp. Shrimp? Shrimp. I like oysters. Okay. Roan is the one who needs answers because Roan is a man of the ocean. I like fish. I like a bronzino.

Bronzino is still the fucking number one. Just a bronzino with some Mediterranean spices right on the bone. Lemon. Olive oil. You can deal with the fish body. You got a lobster body. What are you talking about? It's a lobster tail.

You can't do the fish on the plate. Yeah, I like the fish on the plate. You get a little cheek. The cheek's always tender. Why'd you bring that up, Nick? Oh, you can take it from me. Oh, okay. All right, because Outback.

Chase came in and said I had to do that. Yeah. You know we love Outback. We've been loving the new Great Barrier Eats menu. We don't want to miss these new dishes at Outback Steakhouse, including Tasmanian shrimp plus lobster pasta, prime rib plus shrimp combo, Tim Tam brownie cake, Outback Steakhouse.

He was just eating the Tim Tam brownie. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was.

He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was.

He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was.

He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was.

He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was.

He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was.

He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. It was. Got it. Got it. Caught your ass. Smile. But here's what we got. Today is Tuesday. Tuesday's special Outback Signature Steak, seasoned, seared, and grilled to perfection paired with a steamed lobster tail starting at just $24.99. They told me you got to get the butter, put it on the lobster tail, ready to go.

So head to your local Outback Steakhouse or go to Outback.com To enjoy the Tuesday Tales Steak and Lobster Combo Only on Tuesdays That's why this is here Outback has been crushing it Lessons Tuesdays I mean that's

Like there's nothing better than a day Like I'm sure you guys do like Pizza Fridays Tuesday Steak and Lobster That's incredible Give it to me I feel guilty Give it to me So feel guilty Give it to me So go check it out

Outback.com And this is like nothing for us Yeah $24.99 Tuesday tails Steak and lobster combo Only on Tuesdays Brandon would you like to eat?

People save for this For once a year Oh yeah We are living Save for that once a year Outback I'm not lying One time my parents couldn't meet the goal from the Outback dinner of the year, and so we had to go elsewhere.

We had to go to Ponderosa. That's golden. Pretty much. Outback is the best. How do you guys like your steak? Let's all go around and say. Kate, you want to go first? I'm like a straight medium.

A medium? Right in the middle. That's what, Kate. I like medium as well. I'm a medium rare plus. A medium? Right in the middle. That's what, Kate. I like medium as well. Oh. I'm a medium rare plus. Medium rare. I'm medium rare.

Medium rare plus. My dad likes it well done. Really? I feel like I'm... Yeah, I'll put it right here. I'm a medium hamburger guy, though. I've realized that about myself recently. Why?

Is it yucky a little bit? Yeah, I don't... I just... I ordered it the other day, and I little bit? Yeah, I don't... I just... I ordered it the other day and I was like, yeah, I guess I am a medium hamburger guy. I think it's because

it's handheld. So you don't want to get the drip all over your hands. Yeah, maybe. I feel like some guys go rarer to just seem more manly to other guys. Yeah, there is a...

I feel like there's always a guy at the table that's like, black and blue, please. There is a masculinity problem when it comes to ordering a steak. That is absolutely a fact. I also hate how restaurants try to shame people and be like, well, the chef would really recommend

that you don't get it medium well or well done. It's like, it's your food. You should be able to have it however the fuck you want it. I agree with that. Anything past medium rare, you're a pussy. My mom asked for ketchup once and they refused. Really? Yeah.

I hate when restaurants do that. Yeah. It's the height of pretense. And Brandon, what if a woman wants to have a well-done steak? Yeah, Brandon. Yeah, Brandon. Yeah, Brandon. I think she should be able to have whatever she wants.

I'm with Roan. I think that comes. You think this is the chef's pretentiousness? I think it comes with age and a little self-confidence that I used to be a little boy like Brandon who was like, oh, if you order this, you're gross. 44. If you want a well done, what do I fucking care? It's not me eating it. I'm not putting it in my mouth. I don't give a fuck. Who you want a well done, what do I fucking care? It's not me eating it.

I'm putting it in my mouth. I don't give a fuck. Who you fuck don't make me cum. Chefs aren't humble. I've never met a truly humble chef. Really? They're cocky and mean. Yeah, chefs are kind of dickheads. It's a very performative humility. Oh, you think it's performative? But people

fuck up in the kitchen though. I'm just making food. There's people who will make mistakes in the kitchen. You've got to let them know. Are you a send-it-back guy? I've never sent anything back, but I worked at a pizza place in Sea Isle. Ah. Right where Kate's sweatshirt is representing.

And one time a guy brought back in, like this blue this blue collar guy brought back in his hoagie and there was like he was like hey man i hate to complain i would never complain but look at this meat like can you believe this and he showed it to the manager and the guy was disgusted there was so little meat the kid who made the sandwich fucked up he wasn't paying attention he didn't care and if you fuck up the food you you need to get yelled at by someone yeah i served a sandwich with uh i made it i worked at a putt-putt course. This guy ordered an Italian hoagie, and I didn't take the sticker off the tomato.

You served him a sticker? Served him a sticker. Gross. Is that a thing? Food at a putt-putt course? Oh, yeah. It was a big... Putt-putt, you mean...

Stephen Chay's dreams are coming true. It's an entertainment show. When I worked at a diner, people all the time would finish their food and then be like, I hated this. I want my money back. That's terrible. It happened all the time. What do you say?

Like most of it. I'm like, oh, go see what I can do. And then I go in the back, pretend to talk to someone and be like, I tried my best, but they said there's nothing. You paid out of pocket for their meal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. People would do that at this 10-cent wing place I worked at. There's a certain type of person who sends it back, and that's not a person you want to be.

I can't figure out what type of person it is, though. I sent back a steak. Oh, here it is. Ah, there it is. And here he is. Brandt. Oh, my aunt was a big send it back. Always would embarrass me.

I sent back a steak that I wanted medium rare. This was in Starkville last year. And when I sent it back, the manager came out to me and said, when that steak was coming out to you, we had bets that it would come back to the kitchen. Whoa. I was like, all right, well, why did you send it out to me? I would never send it. But he took care of it.

Why? Because they saw you out there and they're like, oh, that guy's a complainer. No, they just, he knew that the cook, the line cook had fucked it up, and it was way too done. It was a $120 porterhouse. Mississippi? You know, I don't know why y'all do that. I just asked a question. Mississippi has the poorest, fattest, least-

Yeah, 50th in economy. Statistically backed up. 50th in health. 50th in thirst and obesity. Phenomenal food. Phenomenal food. No, it's not. Statistically backed up. With health. It sucks. Durst and obesity. Phenomenal food. Phenomenal food. No, it's not. Yes, it is.

It's all grease. And, and, and. It's phenomenal. Lard. Lard. Okay. You did just say that the $120 steak that you got, you had to send it back. Well, that was one line cook that fucked up.

It was a delicious steak. I'm with you. I'm with you. I'm with you. I think there's great cuisine everywhere. Especially, bro, poor places know how to cook. That's New York City pricing. It was not the fact that that's a $120 steak. That's a lot.

That's like $2,000 in Mississippi. No, it's... Just eat your steak. Eat your steak. I'm sure Ron's making noises. Eat your steak. Have your side veggies. Yeah, send it back. People suck. Well, two, I've... I mean, we. Eat your steak. Have your side veggies. Send it back.

People suck. Well, two, I mean, we've all seen the movie Waiting, and I've worked in the restaurant industry on and off throughout my life. There's some waiting screens. We've all saw. You truly are taking a gamble when you send your food back. Yeah. You've got to have a lot of trust that that back kitchen isn't

Pissing people off. Doing some crazy shit because that does happen. Yes. Yeah, it is. They don't like that. No. Kitchens don't like, I don't know. You know what?

I wouldn't send back this delicious outback steak. No. But what is it about somebody that wants something sent back? Why are there some people that always want to send something back? But if you're paying money, good money for something, and it is subpar, I think if you send it back once, if you've sent something back,

you're not a send-it-back person. If you send back things like 20% of the time you go to a restaurant, you're a send-it-back person. 10%. I think the ones I know, it's frugality. Yeah. Trying to get a deal, something off off the menu something off the bill I mean

there's been times I should have sent things back but I'm such a I'm like if you want to drop another fly in here that's fine if there's something in your food do you tell them I've had people send me the wrong meal with hair in it I'll accept any you could like shit on the plate and I'm like, thank you so much.

Where's the chef? I gotta kiss him. Bring me the chef's cock. Roan. Big night last night. Wow. Checked the scores this morning and gasped. You didn't think it was going to happen? Nobody thought it was going to happen.

Roan, Roan, you. It's based on what Big Cat was saying. Yeah. I did not think they had a chance last night. ESPN was shitting all over them. Everybody was laughing. Vintage Harden. Vintage Harden.

It was so much fun and so exciting, but there's a lot of series left. A lot of series. Austin's so good. In the playoffs, one game doesn't really mean much. They're going to write a whole narrative based on one game. You've got to keep a good head on your shoulders. But you stole that game. Big time robbery.

Yeah, because Embiid not playing. You know in your heart of hearts, you're like, we could win, but more likely than not, we won't. Does this hurt Embiid's MVP chances? Oh, big time. I think the vote's already cast. Oh, okay. But I recast mine. I'd ask for a skit.

Yeah. Really? Yeah, after Jokic last night and Embiid, I think the Sixers are 16-5 without Embiid. It's a damn good team. You got to sit him? I think you got to sit James Harden tomorrow. He's got to be tired.

Yeah, yeah. I did a lot of things last night. I like that. Sit all the guys. I saw PJ look good on the bench. Did you see what he said? Yeah, Yeah. I like that. I did a lot of things last night. I like that. Sit all the guys. I saw PJ look good on the bench. Did you see what he said? Yeah, reaming out our guy.

Yeah, reaming. Motivating him. I think that's healthy for a young player. It's like the line chef fucking up. You've got to be careful. Why? You almost said the Ben word. Ah. Yeah.

Careful. And the Ben word. How's he doing? Eh, who knows. Has he been in contact with anybody? No. I shot him a text last night. You did?

Yeah. That was nice of you. I did too. What? Mine was yesterday afternoon. You probably were like, ha ha, fucker. I told you you're done. It was an ethical dilemma for me.

You reached out to cut ties with him, right? That's what I said. Lose my number. I said it's happened to all of us. Nice knowing you. You just got to look inward with him, right? That's what I said. Lose my number. I said it's happened to all of us. You just got to look inward. You got to look inward. He's his own worst.

He's the only one who ever defeats him is him. Yeah. And really the only one who brings him. He's undefeated. Kramer versus Kramer. He brings himself up too. He bodies him. He bodies himself. He does.

Mercy rule. Absolute bloodbath. Ever since I said I was going to buy all the stock in Mincy, it's gone. It's Mercurial, though. It's a buyout. This is where you buy the dip. This is where things turn around. I don't know.

He thought that after he missed the... Do you think he almost tweeted him trending, like a screenshot, and just been like... Again? Did he actually trend again? Yes, he did. He's trended like five times in the last week for all different things. Oh, yeah. So tomorrow is Wednesday.

Is there going to be a Wake Up Mincy tomorrow? I do not think so. Okay. I think it's going to take a little pause. Okay. And then maybe come back. Or maybe not. I think he needs a studio. Yeah, to take a little pause. Okay. And then maybe come back. Or maybe not. I think he needs a studio.

Yeah, he needs a new studio. Maybe he needs a woke-up Mincy. Yeah. Where he becomes more like that. Oh, yeah. Great idea. A learning occurs. Sits his ass down and listens.

He sure as hell isn't live. I know. Woke up Mincy. There's Max. You had your finger in his butt crack last night. I know. Woke up and see there's Max. He had your finger in his butt crack last night. I know. I wish I went deeper. All I could think about was your back.

I was like, Rome's back. I was bouncing. I thought he was about to squat me, but then I saw from the other angle he was like sitting Indians. Yeah. Native American. Guardian style.

Max just loses his mind. Wow. The position. Finish that. Guardian style Max just loses his mind Wow Good position Finish that Was that a good position Kyle? It usually ends in a stalemate but Max also was just grabbing Roan's face In like

Like slapping the fuck out of me It's like Like bare There he goes You have a grabbable face though Thumb holes Dimple holes for the thumbs Yeah I know it's like bare, like, there he goes. You have a grabbable face though. Thumb holes, dimple holes for the thumbs. Yeah,

I know, it's bad. Like a little bowling ball. I don't blame him though. Max could, Max could defile me. He was grabbing his face like he was like

a German soldier in like World War I like trying to, trying to leave the trenches. Unshelm shock me. Get back in there. Do you have the one

of him grabbing his face? It was the play before. It went double hand grab face. And it was just. Who the fuck is that dude in the Philadelphia shirt? What the fuck is that? Oh, man. He caught a mean stray.

It was all my fault because I invited. I heard Connor like cheering outside of this gambling cave in the third quarter. I was like, Connor, get in here. Hour later, Dave's tweeting. Also, I've never seen or heard of this kid in my life. And he miraculously shows up on the stream. Who the fuck is this clown? Heard of is hilarious.

He might have heard of some kid. What's it mean when the heart is filled with pink on Twitter? TJ? Oh, TJ. The fool Connor Dirty. Connor had a good response. He was very nervous. He gave me, I love whatever.

Did he text you for advice? Oh, yeah. And he was like, you promised that I won't get fired if I tweet this? And I was like, yes, I promise. Like, you're okay. But, yeah, he had a good response out of the mud b-ball paul yeah connor's on the map tj's been in that seat oh yeah yes sir he also dave dave i was texting with dave today because we're going down to florida so we're like, do you want to stream game two? And he was like, is that ponytail fuck coming with you?

And I was like, well, yes, Max is the producer for Pardon My Take. We need to let Connor go down there. Dude, let fucking Connor and Max. Yeah, Paul, I came from the mud, 1-0. He looks like the antidote. Portnoy, dude. He looks like the fucking... Dave left himself wide open here.

What? I mean, you could have just been like, hard to see me from Florida or something like that, and that would have been indefensible, I feel. Yeah. But that would have been an aggressive shot. Yeah. Do you want your little B shit, Steven?

Base cut? Well, I do like that. Kevin Durant, what happened? Oh, yeah. I was very upset. Steven Che is not a playoff guy. Let's not do that. Well, you've lost five in a row, so you're not a playoff guy.

I won five in a row right before that. But you'd be eliminated right now if it was the second round of the playoffs. You've lost five games in a row. That's fair. Not a playoff guy. Five? Five. Yeah, bad. Minor setback. playoffs you've lost five games in a row what's fair not a playoff guy five five yeah bad my minor setback he's also dealing with some minor setback heavy accusations online is he dude what was it some guy said he was joking did he make that someone said that steven che cheated off of

albert breer's mock draft oh my goodness, didn't your mock draft go 4 of 32? Yeah. Or 31? Stephen Che, 11 of the 32 picks were copied from Breer's mock draft that was posted a day earlier. Who posted this? I don't know, but we've got to get out ahead of this. Shouldn't everybody have 11 picks that overlap, though?

That's what I'm saying. I don't see that in anybody else. Che, this is in Excel. That's data. That is data. That is data. It's fact. I don't know who wrote this or who made it, and then I responded, and they said that the joke went over my head, and I didn't get it.

Yeah, I also don't get it. It feels fake because there's no link to it. Can we Google it? Billy. He's hovering again. I will trade you one water

for a steak and lobster. Deal. Okay. There you go. I just wanted the water. Everyone ate? Yeah. Oh, the booth? Do you guys want a steak and lobster? Yeah. Oh, yeah, shit. Oh, the booth?

Do you guys want steak and lobster? Yeah. Did you get one? No. Come get one. Definitely come get one. I'll just give him mine. TJ, I'll run it into you. Where are you going?

I mean, Zaha's got to want some. All right, Zaha, you got to go. Zaha. Yeah. Well, just do it. Just give them all away. So it's actually half a steak, but that still counts. This is the greatest trade deal.

Well, it's half a steak. It's half a steak. You've lost half a steak. You lost half a steak. So I had a little bite of steak, but it's still good, and the lobster's good, too. Here, Phil. A little lobster. Billy has been hoarding waters.

There's multiple water hoarders. He told me that before. He's like, I'm hoarding water. Glenn, he has one too. Is that why we don't have waters here? So is Ken Jack. There are water hoarders? I do it too.

What? I've got to put it under my desk. We have. Be your own. We run out. We have a water thing that you just take. We run out because people are hoarding it. We run out.

There's none because people have six bottles that they're not drinking. That pisses me off. He ran out. I need water. Billy has a case. I didn't know people were hoarding. You have a cooler that you just take a cup and you can take one. Are we talking like a couple? No. A case?

Do you have a case, Kate? I'm not even drinking one. Dude, he was so proud of it. He was like, this sucks that we don't have water. He's like, well, I've been hoarding it. Damn. So yeah, it's bullshit. How many people hoard in this? Probably one running downstairs for a while. Probably one per row at least.

Everything we hoard down here is triple upstairs. Yeah, that's how they do it. True. Did you know upstairs, we have new interns this week, and their internship ends this week. We had one weekend. For the merch thing. Erica did a one-week fantasy camp.

Okay. Well, one of them gave me a shirt. One of them was wearing a very long brim last night. Yeah. That was the Sandlot thing. I saw that guy.

He was wearing the Sandlot hat and the Sandlot shirt. This is from Delaney. Look at this Venn diagram. Oh. We should sell this. Wait. We got to put this on sale.

Yeah. Oh man. People will get that. People this on sale. Yeah. Oh, man. People will get that. People will wear that. Yeah. Yeah. Upstairs is crazy, man. You know you could be doing any of that all the other days, but on Friday you do it all three.

Let's get that in the store. Yeah. Let's not give that kid credit. Do you think Jay cheated on his mock draft? Yes. I'm sure he did. Yeah. I don't he did. Yeah. I don't think he just cheated off Breer.

I think he took a third from Breer, a third from Dane Brugler, a third from somebody else. Right. Because he's not talking to sources, so he definitely just looked at all the other mock drafts. He was like, here's what I should put. What tape did he crunch? Are you talking about me?

No. No. I'm talking about a different mock drafter. Are you talking about Matt? No. No. I'm talking about a different mock drafter. Are you talking about Matt Fitzgerald? Yeah. I absolutely didn't copy anyone. I do talk to a lot of people to get info on that, and, yeah, it wasn't great. Neither were a lot of people this year.

I honestly did not see Albert Breer's mock draft. The good news is you're our junior draft analyst so this is to what you didn't see his mock draft at all i actually did not can you go grab your laptop i want to see if the link purple yeah i want to see i want to see the laptop i want to see the phone up handed over private we're gonna have to do a complete you're gonna see my laptop audit yeah we're doing a full audit we're doing a data audit we don't want to get you in some sort of gotcha moment we want to see my laptop? Audit. We're doing a full audit. We're doing a data audit. We don't want to get you in some sort of gotcha moment. We want to clear your name. All right.

Did you look this up on my computer? No. Yes, we did. Oh, no. It's a long con. I went and clicked on every mock track. If you're guilty, don't hand it over. The other day, I just clicked on it.

Destroy it. Every mock. Drop that now. Owen, would you like to lead the investigation? I shouldn't. Who's the most. Every month. Drop that now. Would you like to lead the investigation? I shouldn't. Who's the most trustworthy? None of us. Hey, Che.

Literally none of us. Che. Yeah. Che, you have to do this. Yeah, you got to check and tell us if the link is purple. Yeah, you got to look at all the links and tell us. Can't lie. You know your history.

You're the only trustworthy investigator here. Che, you also didn't get any steak. Am I correct? Yeah, I already have one. No, here, bro. Have this one. Tim Tam. Hey, come on, man.

He does have a belly full of Tim Tam. He had his dessert already. I got a belly full of Tim Tams. Hank, come here. Talk to the mic. I'm busy today tracking all the people. Thank you. You look jacked today, bro.

The wheel is getting really small, so there's a very good likelihood of wet, so I just wanted you to appear. Okay. Real sad. What a sound bite. The way it slid down was amazing. That was the coolest mic drop ever. Look at that. Let's get everybody in the office.

Look it. There's a one in six chance we get wet today. That was an actual headphone drop. It slid. It's not happening. Just spin it now then. I got up. I got up.

I got up. Tim Tams. I got up. I got up. Oh. Oh. We're out tomorrow too. I'm out yeah

You're fucked Yeah you're fucked You need a wheel reset Yeah It's gonna happen That's gotta be the smallest it's ever been Yeah Yeah it might be

Or largest Getting both the drives off will be awesome Yeah I want to be that guy Oh boy We do have to do compliment minute Fuck No we gotta wait for Sass No have to do compliment minute. Fuck!

No, we got to wait for Sass. No, we got to do compliment minute. Oh, he's right. We need everybody here. Sass has to be here. We do have to do it. We're going to do it. Why are you calling me? You're calling me, dude.

We're getting pranked. Oh, this is... People got my number now from yesterday. How are they... They have yours, too? How are they making it... You could enter two numbers. But how do they have your number?

It's got to be someone you know. My number leaked the first week I worked here. Oh, from the resume, right? Yeah. I wasn't going to say it, but now people can just search it again. Yep. That's all right.

Let's do a compliment minute. We'll stop whenever Sass comes up kb uh bro man's on this lobster bro i know it's your i know it's your favorite come on now it's your favorite one's enough no bro indulge i'm not i'm done with indulging one tail at all are you ready to compliment rome i'm always ready to compliment rome okay let's get let's make it a fast minute. Yeah. Can we do 45 seconds? Yeah, like 30 seconds. What's a minute on, like, Pluto?

I have to try to do a minute's worth in 30 seconds. Mercury, yeah. Like, what's a minute on a Mercury minute? So how long is that? This has to be all sincere. Wait, do the minutes go faster there? On Mercury, because when astronauts go up, they, uh, something. That's a minute, right?

Oh, no, because there was twin astronauts and the one up in space came back younger. Really? Yeah, they sent one up to space and one stayed on Earth. I don't think that's correct at all. Are we going to do this again? Are we going to do this again? Brandon hasn't seen the answer. Every time you correct me, you're wrong.

TJ, twin astronauts, please. Bring it up. I hope I'm right. You've got to be right. Steven, how's the audit doing? Oh, I stopped. I don't even know what I'm looking for. I didn't read all of her stuff.

I do like him. Fights got in trouble with one of those two astronauts. Why? Because he said that the astronaut's wife was a total smoke show. And I think did a whole blog about how hot she was. And then he came in here and he was like, which one of these guys said my wife was hot? Why would he get mad at that?

And nice jugs. Something like that. Okay. Anyway. Oh, looks like Nikki was right. Did you see Ben Askren try to compliment his wife? Oh, it was brutal. He didn't even try to compliment his wife.

Oh. Insane. He's like, all you guys saying that your wife is hot, I like my wife because she's a mother of my children. She's a great mother. He just like completely. He could have said and hot as well. Yeah.

Yeah. That was bad. I've seen some guys posting on social media lately about how they're winning because their wife is attractive. Well, I don't disagree. I think finding a wife who is a great mother is 500% more important. Thanks for being such a great

mom to our kids. I'm sorry. I think that's fine. No! Implication! We know what he meant, but the wording's horrible. But he's attempting to but he worded it poorly and also he didn't have to add right i mean while i don't disagree i'm not expecting a wordsmith like and they're pretty much right but also my wife is a mom if pat tweeted something like that

he said but i'd rather or right yeah yeah yeah it was or. A cute one would have been get yourself a wife that does both. I love my ugly fucking wife. Yeah. She's not even a mom. There is a legendary one where the guy called his wife fat. I love my curvy wife is the one. Oh, who was that? Was that a politician or something?

I don't care that she is. Yeah, it was. I love my robust wife. Did you see the Snapchat? A rotund wife. Did you see Snapchat? Trouble for making Hugh Jackman's wife fatter. Really? He's married to this?

But then they made her three times larger than she is. He is married to an older woman, right? Yeah, wouldn't be who you expect for Hugh Jackman. What would you expect for Hugh Jackman? A male. Another guy. Yeah. He is gay, huh? I got my What would you expect for Hugh Jack? A male. Another guy. It's true. He is gay, huh?

Yeah. I got my post banned on TikTok last night for sexual exploitation. Oh. It was just Max's ass crack. I wonder if you tried that. It's crazy. Ass crack? That's not sexy at all.

I don't have one. Yeah, you're right. I'm just getting spam calls. That's on sexy at all. I don't have one. Yeah, you're right. I'm just getting spam calls. That's on there. Shit. I looked it up. A minute is 23 seconds on Mercury. Okay.

23 seconds of compliments on Mercury. Wait, does everybody do the same planet? Yeah. Oh, God, yeah. A spin for the planet? Oh, no. Is it longer on some? If Mercury's shorter, it's got to be longer.

What's a minute on each? No, let's just... 23 seconds. It's like three hours. 23 seconds will come. It's still on a minute. There it is. All right, ready, Brandon? Like a shot clock in the NBA.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Ready? Yeah. Lock eyes. Go. Rome, yeah, yeah. Okay. All right. Ready? Yeah. Lock eyes. Go. Rome, what can be said about Rome? The most talented guy I've ever met.

The nicest guy I've ever met. You send text messages to me to pick me up when I'm down. You send text messages to me to pick me up when I'm up. You are the most talented of us. You're one of the funniest of us. You're cute as a goddamn button. You are terrific. You're going to be an incredible person

and a great podcast host you have twice a podcast successful podcast i have you're terrific fantastic man i'm okay not have a minute i didn't have a minute you went talented twice you also said he's going to be a great podcast host i don't know did i yeah yeah i like that well see what i was gonna say day aspiration i say what ipiration. Can I say what I was going to say? I was going to say, you're going to be a great dad, but then in my head I was like, does he even want kids? No, I do. I do. Okay.

So that's what I was going to say. Thank you. Also, even if you don't want kids, you would be a great dad. That's what I should have said. That's where I was trying to go, and then I changed it at the last minute. I thought it was very genuine. Thank you, brother. That made me feel great and uncomfortable, which I think is the goal.

We stayed eyes locked the whole time. All right, Spinners to see who gets next. And the last person does me, right? Yeah, sure. If we have time. Okay. All right, then we stop. Then we stop.

That was awesome. That was fun. Why did I have to? Well, because I said we're going to spin until Sask gets here. So when Sask gets here, Ron will compliment Sask. All right. They're not going to spin until Sask gets here. So when Sask gets here, Rohn will compliment Sask. All right. They're not going to like this. They?

Yeah. Oh, big they. Oh, they. Oh, them. I know what that means. We're not going to like this. I know what they are. They're not going to like it.

Those guys. Dude, I love this delivery guy. Is he the helmet one? Trench coat guy? No, he's the, oh, he kind kind of putters in and putters out. Well, like putter. Short steps, but he's got a good attitude every day. Am I too big to putter?

What kind of body do you need to putter? I think you can putter. You loaf. You loaf. Yeah, you loaf. I do loaf. You could saunter as well. I saunter?

You could. Uggs loafs. Yeah. Yeah. I wouldn't mind finding the funniest 10 walks in the office because I see funny walks all the time Big T is a funny walker Big T is a hilarious walker Big T, Blattman

Big T walks behind himself somehow I love, he does I don't know how he does it Go get Big T, let's see him walk And it's very little movement Seeing him out in the streets of New York is the best. Sometimes I'll just stand by Pret because I don't want to talk to any coworkers, and I just watch people walk in and out,

and it's awesome seeing people out in the wild. Yeah. I've seen him at, we live next to each other. I've seen him at my Dunkin' Donuts. He walked in. I know he saw me. That's for the best. And walked out.

Just like that, yeah. Fair. See if you can get him walking naturally. He walks behind himself. Here he comes. He only does it when he's not thinking. If he knows he's doing something, he might know.

He doesn't know right now. No, he'll do it. He doesn't change. Leans forward a little bit. Yeah, it's a lean and a... There we go. Starting to lean now. It's very little movement somehow.

Yeah, he's kind of a very silent walker. For a big guy, it's a... We just wanted to watch you walk. Stealthy walk. You have a good walk. Serene, your head doesn't move. Serene is a good word for it. No wasted movement.

Yeah, right. Very little movement. Who's somebody whose walk that you've noticed? Maybe you can send them in. We can check out their walk. She's at the entrance of this place, basically. That's a good question. Rico's got an interesting gait to him.

Okay. Kind of a... It's not a... It just walks like he's escaping. It's not a waddle, but he's trying to get somewhere. Okay. Oddly. Call him in.

We have a lot of toe walkers in the office, too. Almost like a swatch. Let's watch PT walk away. This is really the most efficient walk I've seen. Tommy flares his... It's so feminine. Tommy's... Yeah, away. This is really the most efficient walk I've seen. Tommy flares his... It's so feminine. Tommy's Tommy. Yeah, look.

There he goes. He's walking behind himself. Walking behind himself. He really is. Something about his upper back is interesting to me in his walk. Spider has an incredibly powerful walk for his size. Yeah, he does. He walks with purpose.

It's purpose, yeah. Jersey Jerry, he has. He walks with purpose. It's purpose. Jersey Jerry has a he has like kind of a sad walk. It has like kind of a hunched over. He walks like he's sneaking around almost. Like he doesn't want to be. Oh, I think he walks like he just He's not there. He just

like got really bad news. Yeah. Grab Jerry. Here, I'll tell Jerry to come in. That's just a plain walk right there. Normal-ass walk. Plain walk? Is that good? Is that athletic to have a plain walk?

It's just a walk. Kind of smooth. He's a little outward toed. Walking the latest chick show. Nope. A little bit of a hunch shoulder. It's got to be the phone pulling him down. It's crazy what that does.

I try to stop using my phone while I walk. Because it just draws you towards zero. You just succeed? So you try to do it. Yeah. The problem is this. I stop skipping songs. I mean, it works.

It's awesome. When it hits, it's such a euphoric burst. Do you skip songs? The average length of a song I listen to is probably three seconds. I think I like two songs. What? I've been saving so many songs from this method. New songs, finding good music.

I found, too, my attention span. If a song's slow to pick up, I'm just like, next. But you're right. It's an attention span. You're trying to beat that. I started listening to a Huberman guy. I don't know if he's for me. I don't know if he's for me.

I think I picked three of his good tenets and followed those. Oh, here comes Jerry. Oh, yeah, Frank's got a great walk. Frank is like a ship. Yeah. Going side to side. Yeah. Tough to stop it once it's going.

Yeah. Look at him. No, no to stop it once it's going. Yeah. Look at that. No, no. All right, here comes Jerry. Look at, see? Yeah, he's a sad walker. It's very sad. It's an Eeyore.

Hey, Dan. Hey. Where'd he go? He disappeared? No, there he is A little hit of the vape Yeah What a bit of a stomp to it

Yeah look how sad he is It's a bit of a shuffle Jerry has anyone ever told you You walk sadly? Talk to the mic Are your teeth better? You got the wisdom teeth? How long did it take to get better?

A day. Okay. I feel a little bit better. I can't really chew that good, but I lose a little weight. You know, I've actually got a bigger appetite. Oh. Which is wild. So what do you just have? Mashed potatoes and applesauce? Pudding.

Really? Apioca. How many are you putting down? So it's funny. I made a reservation at this place in Edgewater like weeks ago. And I called them up the day before my surgery and I was like, hey, I can't make it. Sorry. So yeah, well, you're going to get charged $100 a seat.

Like, fuck it. I'll go. Then I just ordered ice cream the whole time. Really? It's a fancy restaurant? I guess the River Palm Yeah it's not bad Oh yeah that's good Yeah yeah

Pretty good I like it But you said you ordered ice cream the whole time Is that multiple orders of ice cream? Two orders two orders two orders That's a baller move I had a regular like some Italian pistachio gelato And then like the next one was a banana It was my favorite thing I've ever had Banana caramel macadamachio gelato, and then the next one was a banana. It was my favorite thing I've ever had.

Banana caramel macadamia nut gelato. That's good. Sounds fire. Delicious. That's a great dinner. That's like a perk of being an adult. So good. No one can tell you no on some shit like that.

Yeah. Are you still mad at me? At about what? About the Frank thing? I was mad at you months and months and years ago. Oh, okay. You've been holding that, though. It's been inside me somewhere, yeah.

I'm over it, whatever. So what's the future look like for that stuff? I don't know. So you just can't tell me no anymore? Well, I can. I know you can. I don't have to listen. I just think Frank is his own country.

Jerry's kind of his own country, too. Not really. He listens when I listen. If he says I might listen to him. He's my boss. Frank's like Rosa Parks. Yeah, Frank has just changed the liberation of all sports fans at Parsifal Sports. That was the first time I looked at you and I was like, yo, Dan doesn't even have an answer for this.

No. He got me so... He was just fucking stonewalling me. I didn't even say hello to him when I walked by him. Because you're mad at him and I was like, yo, Dan doesn't even have an answer for this. No. He got me so... He was just fucking stonewalling me. You didn't say hello to him when I walked by him. Because you're mad at him. Yeah. I'm happy he won. No, Frank's not aware or doesn't give a shit if you're mad at him. Of course, I know that.

Okay. I'm happy that he got to see it and won at the end of the day. Yeah. I just looked at him, just walked by him and was like... Didn't say hello enough. Didn't say hello back. Alright, well thanks, Jerry. I'm happy you're feeling better by him, and was like, didn't say hello. Didn't say hello back. All right, well, thanks, Jerry. Happy you're feeling better. Yeah, I'm all good.

Yeah. There he goes, a sad walk. Real quick, can I promote something? Yeah. Jersey Jerry Promotions, Rough and Rowdy, May 12th. I got these two guys. One's fresh out of county jail and stuff like that. He's got his life back together, though.

The other guy, I did a promotion on him. It'll come out soon. Are you getting a cut? No. My first promotion ever. I did it last night. Oh, nice. Love it. Alright, thanks, Sherry. Where is the next one? Huntington. Oh, okay. Marshall. Oh, is it there?

No, that's Marshall, right? Yeah, yeah. We got that as a trivia question. People got mad about that. One of the most random things ever is their soccer team winning an NCAA title. Shocker. Did? Yeah.

Division I? How are they getting good soccer recruits to Huntington? That's crazy. It was like two years ago, maybe three, but it was crazy. You think like UCLA Right UNC Women's soccer UNC women's soccer

Runs fucking nutty Mm-hmm Yeah they're I know they're I memorized their entire roster They don't know us I'm kidding I didn't do that

That couple spiders walk Tell a lot by a man This walk He was a saunter bro He looks like a fucking 70's pimp on the block Who's that guy? He's got somewhere to be

Oh I thought he was going to the bathroom I would love to get Dave Into the office And just line up every person On the second floor How many names you could get? The second floor?

Yeah. Well, third floor, I can't speak because I don't know a lot of people. I thought you meant the second floor of our office. Oh, yeah. I'm saying the content floor. Just line them all up. What do you think? I was thinking like 37%.

Yeah, that seems right. No way. 50. No chance. I don't think you'll know. Think seems right. No way. 50. No chance. I think you'll know. Think about all the content. But all the content is locked in. He's going to know all of them. I don't think so. Who's the content

person you think Dave wouldn't know? I don't think that exists. Julio. Julio. He might not know Julio. He's getting half the producers, I bet. Yeah, maybe more. Maybe a lot more.

How are you looking like that, Stephen? The data in his head. Did I look at Albert Breer's mock draft? I just looked at it. We did the same six first picks, but, I mean, that's not crazy. It's a coincidence. All right, so you had Bryce Young one, which everybody had.

And you had – Tyree Wilson two. Okay. You had Will Anderson three. Yep. You had interesting dynamics at quarterback. Stroud four. Yep. And then you had Weatherspoon five uh jalen carter and weatherspoon six yeah i think five six were

pretty chalk yeah before i reached out to some people and got that the day before i also created this the night before so i could have graphics done somebody that grades all the mock drafts online that's a special breed of human being i saw that yes that is a special desire to to grade people if you're grading mock drafts in mass like that if you grade one whatever but grading everybody's like after the draft yeah it was a company that did it on Sunday. What did you – were you – I think I finished tied for 68th. Oh. You got four of 31 picks right.

Oh, no. There's stuff with trades and stuff like that. And you had to really give them – Oh, no. Really three and a half. Really three and a half. You have to take that out of your Twitter bio? It's not in my Twitter bio.

I thought you had best mock drafter last year. I thought I had that for a little bit. Should we count Will Anderson? He had Will Anderson going three, but going to the Cardinals. Wrong. That's wrong.

If you get the slot or the team right. We just wanted to see your walk. Why? We're just grading walks. I got a bad walk. You got a bad walk?

I don't think you have a bad walk. The back problems. Yeah, I got to go to a doctor. Why'd you shave your mustache? Because I bullied him yesterday. What the fuck, Brandon?

I just said it's an interesting one. My wife likes it, too. I didn't know he was going to shave it. Why would you let him do that to you? It wasn't just me. It was Big Ev, too. Doing this new thing where I just say yes. That will work out in the long run for you.

We're going okay. Yeah. You should have kept the mustache. Yeah. Lobsters, huh? Yeah. Matthew. You want Roan. Lobsters, huh? Yeah. Matthew. You want rounds?

Yeah, eat this one. Nah, the last time I ate all that thing, I... No, no, you're good. No, eat it. No, you can eat it. I'm not going to eat this lobster. I'm having some of the steak, but I don't want... Eat the lobster.

I'm literally not going to eat it. I'm really not going to eat it. What happened to saying yes? Yeah, all right. Yeah, grab the lobster. I'm just having the steak. You know what I mean? You grab the lobster.

Eat it like corn on the cob, though. Nah, you can't... So his wife liked it, but Brandon and Big Ev didn't? Yeah. He shaved it? I'm just having the steak. You know what I mean? You grab the lobster. Eat it like corn on the cob, though. So his wife liked it, but Brandon and Big Ev didn't? Yeah. And he shaved it? That's brutal. Wild move.

Yeah, Stephen Shay just brought up a big point. So your wife liked the mustache, but me and Big Ev didn't, so you shaved it. Well, I have to deal with you during the day. You don't have to deal with her at night? I do. But you're way more... Annoying? Yeah, and you have a bigger audience. That's true.

Undeniable. You can have people turn on me faster. Rika, who was best dressed at the Met last night? Oh, we have pictures. A furry. Jared Leto. Jared Leto. We have pictures, TJ.

I told TJ to get some pictures ready if we wanted to. Oh. D Leto. Jared Leto. We have pictures, TJ. I told TJ to get some pictures ready. Dibs. Sorry. Fuck. That's classy. I'm holding out my dib. What, Amrata? No, we'll see.

Dua Lipa has them. Dua Lipa, dude. Awesome tattoos. Really? Yeah, I think those are like cool. Those are cool girl tattoos. Yeah. Not a ton.

If I didn't work at Barstool Sports and have to be on the internet so much, I would not know who Dua Lipa is. Yeah, you would. I wouldn't. I don't listen. She's broken crazy records. I'm not taking tips here, anyone. No. All right.

Are we judging the person or the dress? It's like Penelope Cruz. No. Last name Cockburn. Her last name's Cockburn? Yeah. Really? That's fine.

Olivia Wilde wore the same dress as someone else. We never figured out what. Why do we never. I know Dwayne Wade is different, but they botched the spelling of Dwayne. Oh, no. But I know he has a funny spelled name, but they took it the wrong way. That's Dwayne. Oh, yeah.

It's Dwayne. The Y is before the A in Dwayne. I guess that's how he does it. The Y is before the A. That's how he does it. Dwayne Wade. Oh, Ice Spice. She thinks that's so...

Yeah. Ice Spice. It's a cap. Her dress is very similar to the other dresses. Are you regretful that you called dibs so early? No. Really? What do you got?

Who'd you get? You got. Oh, a lipa. Yeah. A two-e lipa. Stu calls her. Giselle. That's a fuck you dress.

Oh, he's thumbs downing her. Let me grab that. You took Tom's side on that breakup? Shout out Outback. Yeah, shout out Outback. Thank you, Rico. Yeah, sure out Outback. Thank you, Rico. Yeah, she ruined the whole season for us. Oh.

Okay. She divorced her. She got a divorce. No woman. Oh, sure. I know. He's a class. How are you worried about your season if a mother got a divorce?

Because I'm a football fan? What a dumb question. It was a dumb question. Fair enough. Tibbs. Fuck. She looks like she's kneeling on a step stool. Yeah, there's a weird, yeah.

I don't know what's going on with that. I agree with fights, though. Fights tweeted out, like, for her to have the amount of fame she does, there's nothing super unique about her. And then everybody in the comments is like, tits, tits, tits. Yeah, I know you forgot about the titties. But there's nothing. Yeah, she's like super stunning.

Oh, you mean the titties. It's a face that makes you look twice. Does it? Okay. And the tits that make you look thrice. Yep. At each. At each.

That's six looks. Six. That's eight. That's eight combined looks just for her. Yeah. Fair enough. Before you even get to the pussy. It's an octo look, and then you work down a pussy.

Yeah. Hypothetical question. If a very attractive woman had three tits, would it be more or less attractive? Or where's the third one? Is it on the back? Right in the middle. No, they're lined up. Bang, bang, bang.

Bang, bang, bang. Oh, it would be cool if it was like a tail on her lower back. Or biologically attracted to the symmetry. Oh, is that true? I don't know. So you'd like one? I just say shit now. Okay, well, there needs to be a group of three-titted people.

It can't be just an anomaly. So if there was a three-titted... Take the hottest person from the Met Gala. How do you titty-fuck three tits? That's like an N64 controller. You need a friend. You need a friend. You need a friend. Okay.

Sounds like you would. I don't know. It's hard to conceptualize. What about four? I don't think it's hard. I think it's a definite no. That would be like you're fucking a cow. But are we living in a world where that would be normal? Nope. It wouldn't be considered weird.

Do you have three hands? Three years ago, I may have said no. What is that? What? Karl Lagerfeld had a cat named whatever, and so a bunch of people came dressed as cats to honor his cat. The whole evening was to honor him. He's dead now.

Oh, what an idiot. Fashion designer. I would never die. So she came as his cat as did jared leto dibs oh people yeah people i i knew he was cool and suave and that's attractive but people are now saying he is like physically hot yeah i think so yeah is he a it boy he's got like a lank a little bit of a lankiness a little bit of like a i don't care a little bit scraggly i do i do not think most ladies like super he's in the white man can't jump reboot and it looks okay it does look okay he's funny yeah he's funny he seems like he has a personality is uh his instagram story when kyle lowry on him. He talks about gay shit in a funny way. He pretends to be gay.

It's cute. It's Kristen Stewart. Jibs. Robert Pattinson. Oh, you went with Selma. Damn, good pick. Was she married to Michael Douglas? No, it wasn't.

Then he got cancer because he ate her pussy so much. Billie Eilish looked amazing last night. No, no. That's Catherine T. Jones. And he got cancer because he ate her pussy so much. Billie Eilish looked amazing last night. Oh, Steven. Fuck the 5G towers. Who's Phineas? That's her brother. TJ, look it up. Michael Douglas got throat cancer for eating so much pussy.

A news article just came out saying that's becoming a problem again. Steven. Uh-oh. I know. He doesn't have it in him. Shay! Shay lives next to a 5G tower and exclusively eats pussy. Welcome back to the act.

Yeah, it happened. Tongue cancer. Yeah. We just, us ladies cannot catch a break. You got to put a batting glove on that tongue. What's the guardian? Oral sex caused my cancer.

Pretty huge. Well, it's not oral sex. It's HPV causing cancer. You know, that's ladies. But still, careful out there. Yeah, you do have to be careful, Che. Close. Don't want anything to happen to that tongue.

Go out doing what you love, you know? You're eating pussy and die. Steven? I'll be off. Oh, no. Have we ever seen a picture of inside the Met Gala? Or do they not do that They don't do that

So they just go in and then what do they do Sometimes you get like some leaked pics from like the bathroom or something But it's just like a party inside the Met At a file ring I understand the big dresses to walk in But then you gotta be so fucking uncomfortable for the rest of the night Most of them change Oh

Really Here he is Sash you're up on compliment minute Most of them change. Oh. Really? Yeah. Here he is. Sash the man. Sash, you're up on compliment minute. Oh, shit, really? Yeah, Roan's going to compliment you. Oh.

Little Nas X. Great Twitter follow. That looks uncomfortable. You know he has as many number one hits as Kanye? Wow. Someone should be that for the next case race. Huh? Someone should be little Nas X for the next case race. Huh? Someone should be Lil Nas X

for the next case race. Full body. I love that. That looks... I just... There's something about Jared Leto that I cannot... Hmm?

You guys see the video of A$AP Rocky, like, jumping through the crowd to get in? No. Weird. He, like, jumped over the fence to get back to his hotel

from the event or something like that. Yeah. He, like, went right through everybody. Yeah. Sash, you fence to get back to his hotel from the event or something like that. Yeah, he like went right through everybody. Sass, you ready to get complimented? No. Okay, well, you have no choice. I have to.

You want to be a big compliment as if you took this plate? You can just put it over here, Sass, on this big table. We're only doing 23-second compliment minutes. Oh, okay. Mercury. I can handle that. It's a minute in Mercury. Are you ready, Ron?

I just don't want to really go for it. Don't hold back. Sass, you are the sunshine. You are the rain. Look him in the eyes. For the joy through all the pain. Thank you. You are the wonder, you are the cure.

You are my friend and you are pure. Whoa, thank you. You are lovely and you are tall. I am. Your dick is the opposite of small. Oh, wow. Love you for who you are. Little Sasquatch, you're a star.

God damn. Wow. Brandon, that makes yours. I know. I didn't know what we were doing. Just off the dome. Pre-written. Stop, bro.

Were you thinking it was Kate? Writers are on strike, bro. I can't fucking go off the dome. God damn. Goodness. What did I miss? Write it down. So now you're up.

You got to do someone now. You gotta compliment someone. Have you guys been doing this the entire time? We were like, let's do it and then we'll stop when Sass' name gets hit on the wheel. And it was the first spin. So we did one. Brandon did Roan and then you came up.

Oh shit. So we stopped. Oh, Zod. Zod, come on in here. Get on in here, Zod. How'd the sketch go? Very well. When's the next episode coming out?

I think mid-May. Okay, nice. Seems far away, but we're in May. Yesterday was the first of the month. How could you forget? No one forgets that it was the first of the month. Let's get 23 seconds on that clock. Remember to keep perfect eye contact with Saz.

Get a little closer. You want to stand over there? Really, get right next to him. You don't got to get that close. with Saz. Get a little closer. You want to stand over there? Get right next to him. You don't got to get that close. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hell yeah. Yeah. I'm going to do this from now on. Maybe hold both his hands.

No. That was not a requirement. This isn't a requirement. Let's do it. You're not at. You can't at. You can't at fucking shit. Okay.

All right, Zaw. Are we ready? Let's get that timer started. All right, Zaw. Fuck. Where do Let's get that timer started. All right, Zaha. Fuck. Where do I even start? No, no, no. You can't.

He hasn't said a compliment yet. The time can't be going. You can't over. You can't talk over. Go back to 23 seconds. You can't talk over. I was literally just getting warmed up. You said, Zaha, where do I start?

And you were seven seconds. Start the clock on the first compliment. Where do I even start? Okay. There's so many things I could compliment him about. So start. All right, Z the first compliment. Where do I even start? Okay. There's so many things I could compliment him about. So start. All right. Zah, where the hell do I even start?

There are so many things that I could compliment you about. One thing that I'd like to compliment you about is your extremely good train conducting skills. The best train conductor I know. Hell of a train conductor. Look him in the eyes. The other day in a guy, they hit someone. I know. I said, know i said i looked to everyone i said my buddy za would never do something like this because he'd stop the damn train he's a hell of a conductor all right so i got three compliments

there and they were all the same thing yeah terrible comment all being a good train conductor it's not staying here because you're gonna have to compliment someone what did you want from me there brandon i don't know i gave gave Roan 11. Up brings the energy. He brings the vibes. What would make you happy, Brandon? He's a great guy to be around. I could have gone for 15 minutes. Talked about him playing video games that you've never even watched.

You don't even know if he's a good train conductor. And he's also a hell of a train conductor. Literally never seen him conduct a train. I don't even know if he's a good train conductor. Someone get mad at me for complimenting my friend. It's like you boys were jealous. Name a fact about him that isn't good train conductor. Someone get mad at me for complimenting my friend. It's like you boys were jealous. Any more fact about him that isn't about train conducting? He's a hell of a partier, I'll tell you that.

Yeah. There it is. True. Love to go to Sunday brunch with Zah. All right. Who's Zah? This is where it gets uncomfortable. Oh!

Nick! Get right in his face. Yeah, use his mic. Thank you. Are you ready? Yeah. No, you're not. All right.

Three, two, one, go. Nick, one of the most creative minds I've ever come across, man. I admire every single thing that you do. You inspire me with every piece of work that you put out there, your meticulous level of detail, how you care about everything that you do. Also, you're just generally a good guy, man. Wow. You always check in on me, ask me how it is.

We're chatting Aston Villa nowadays. That's another level to our relationship going. Great job. Good job. That's how it's done, Sass. Thank you, Sass. That was good. That was awesome.

I feel good about that. I rock. Man, that was great. Brandon, no Brandon, no Brandon, no Brandon. I'm not on the damn. Ooh, Che. Get in here, Che. Arguably worse.

He's going to end up with Che complimenting me again. So whoever's left on the wheel last, that's complimenting me. No, that's the end. If we have time. No, at last. If we have time. Oh, that's how it cycles around. If we have time.

Get a jam in that show. Get right in his face. You want me to? No, no. You got to, Stephen, get there. Lower. Bend over. Lower.

Get on your knees. Oh, no. Yeah, Stephen, get there. Lower. Bend over. Lower. Get on your knees. Oh, yeah. Lower. Are we good? Okay. Stephen, I don't want to mince words, so I have something pre-written. Wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up. It's the first of the month.

So get up, get up, get up. I kid. Steven, I'm going to give you an acrostic poem. Che. C-H-E-A-H. C is for charisma. You have it in spades. H is for honor.

You're like a knight of the round table. You'll do anything as long as it's in the name of good. E. Woo! Wow. What are you going to do for the second H? The second H was going to be for hmm, because he keeps me thinking. E for excitement.

A for A plus. The grade. Wake up. Wake up. First of the month. First of the month. Get up, get up. Wake up. The first of the month. The month. Get up, get up, get up. I fucking knew it. I know.

Here, kid, over here. Also, minutes are not 23 seconds. I made that up. I didn't think they were. The minutes don't change. Dude, this is too close. This is so uncomfortable. Closer.

Turn your hat backwards if you need to be closer. No, no. That feels bigoted, Steven. Hold his hands. That feels bigoted, Steven. Hold his hands. It feels bigoted. Ew, I don't like this. That's nice. A little connection.

That's so gross. Stop. All right. Ready? We good? Thumbs up? It's on you. Yes?

You're rolling, brother. You look great in that Carolina blue blue i noticed that's one of your favorite colors you have just a great secret collection you're too close to me it's making me uncomfortable oh compliment uh you obviously are a very successful hard-working uh person at this company it's always best at some kiss um. Best guy is your hardest worker. I think a kiss should be able to move your minute. Yeah, I'll kiss the next person who comes up.

Even if it's Kate? Thank you, Billy. I have a headache from all these compliments. Billy's coming for leftovers. No, I asked him to get me some Advil. I actually asked for Tylenol. Oh. Check the text.

Come on, please. Give me again. Okay. Did I say Advil? Fuck! I said Advil. Oh, Kate. Let's do this, Kate.

I'm going to take my Advil. Coming over. Coming over. Kate, you have to look at me. I have to look. Okay, tell me when. Ready? Okay. Set, go.

Kate, ever since you got your adult braces out, the way you smile lights up a room. On your lips and your eyes. Look at him. Look at me, Kate. At him, Kate. You're so beautiful inside and out. Like Ben Askren's wife, who's only beautiful on the inside.

Kate, you are a breath of fresh air. Look at him. I actually thought we were going to fuck first. You guys felt that, right? We were pretty close. I've never seen someone make less eye contact. You're on the surface of the sun. We're moving around like a chameleon, dude.

Just like... Oh, Kate and KB is a great match. I've been waiting for this. Get over here, Kate. Okay. Oh. Yeah, I know you're a little hot. I fucking did that.

This is going to be like two magnets getting forced at each other. Reverse sides. I've been Wim Hofing. I will not be awkward. Oh. All right. Okay. Do I have to?

Is there any popcorn I can pick up, Mala? Kate has made this so awkward she hasn't started. I'm sweating. Okay. Is there any popcorn I can pick up. Kate has made this so awkward she hasn't started. I'm sweating. KB! Yeah. KB, you are such a treat of a person. You make me laugh all the time

even when you're just being you doing nothing. He's a great guy Thank you I'm having a panic attack You're doing good You are You've got great muscles

And you have really fun style That I admire And what a fun guy Yes That was great Fun Good Wasn't so hard

I've created a few of those No offense But you just got friendzoned I did You're just a fun guy. I don't know why this is so hard. You're funny even like just, you know, walking around. It's hard because this show is built on being brutally mean to each other.

It's tough. Mostly Brandon. So, TJ, get in here. So, KB to TJ and then TJ to Brandon If we have time I think I have social issues I think this mic is soaking in sweat Okay

Huh That's a good walk Yeah TJ's got a good walk Yeah he kind of floats a little bit Yeah To KB or KB to you Yeah, TJ's got a good walk. Yeah, he kind of floats a little bit. He floats. Yeah. Yeah, to KB or KB to you. Get down.

Tips. Did we start doing the deep? Fofos. Wrapped in fofos. Get ready. Whenever you want to start. TJ, we need you back in the booth. Yeah, they're struggling. Look, that's a compliment itself. Are you going to stop? TJ, we need you back in the booth. Yeah, they're struggling.

Look, that's a compliment itself. Are you going to start? Do I have to start? I thought you were going to start the clock. You have to start. You have to start, yeah. I have to start first? Oh, TJ, since you joined the Yak, you've made my life

and I think everyone else's life significantly better. Your skills in production, in social media, and your sense of humor has been a breath of fresh air and has made the Yak infinitely better. Your skills in production, in social media, and your sense of humor has been a breath of fresh air and has made the Yak infinitely better. Your creativity, I admire. Your charisma, your confidence, your passion toward record sports, your interests

align with mine, and I think they're very eclectic and fun. You are a good person. Ooh! TJ cried! You made TJ cry! That was good class. TJ didn TJ cried. He made TJ cry. Wow. That was good class. TJ didn't blink at all,

and a tear slowly welled up in his eye. Things have gotten... Remember when Jay was the TJ, and we had to send him links we may talk about a day or two before the game? Why'd y'all let him leave, though? TJ, spin the wheel one last time and see who you have to compliment.

It's 2-'s 206. For the record, I think many more nice things about KB. I just... It's too awkward. All right, TJ, compliment yourself. It's too awkward. That would be the worst if we each had to compliment ourselves for a minute. I feel like we had a...

I'm all right. All right, okay, you can pass. We had a firm set of rules that were set forth, and y'all are just going against it for a minute. I feel like we had a I'm alright. Alright, okay. You can pass. We had a firm set of rules that were set forth and y'all are just going against it for no reason. I think you should be able

to compliment yourself. I think you'd be the best at complimenting yourself. I know. Constantly. Yeah. I do do it constantly because I have to.

You have to. You want me to fucking compliment you? No, I don't want you to compliment me. You complimented me last time and then y'all turned the mics off.

Oh yeah, that is right. I forgot what we did. So we've actually evolved. Now we're just not doing it. Yeah, right. TJ, would you like to compliment Brandon? He's not a sad, sad man. Oh, I don't need TJ to compliment me.

TJ compliments me every day. Compliment this guy. Brandon, I appreciate all you did for me. You're the reason why I'm here. It's true. There you go. I could keep going. At one point, I was considering moving to Starkville, Mississippi with you,

but now I don't need to. What? Well, we didn't go. You were going to do that, TJ? Yeah, but then my career took off. Thanks to me. Sure. And now we're forever friends.

Yes. I'm happy your career took off that you didn't have to go to Starkville. It would have been wonderful, though. It would have probably. A big old house. Go to Mississippi State games. Don't get me started.

That's the life I want. I don't want your life. I want my life. What kind of house could you have got in Starkville with what you paid for in Chicago? About the same house. Really? Starkville prices are pretty high.

Really? What? Because they're in a college town, yeah. Pretty high. So where would it be, West Point? In my hometown, I could have gotten the nicest house. One of the nicest houses. We have a golf course that has expensive houses, million-dollar houses.

You'll be on there someday, brother. Is that the goal? No. No. My land is not by the golf course. It's out by the creek. So you just want to build up on your land. No. My land is not by the golf course. It's out by the creek. So you just want to build up on your land. Correct.

So you would build a big-ass house on your land you already have. Yes, that's what I would like to do. The creek? Well, not on the creek because that's down by the bottom, but up on the pasture side, yeah. That's going to be fucking sick. Cows? Not right now.

You'll get them. Good, though. It's where the old worm farm was. Start with the chickens, then get the donkeys. Work your way up, then get some cows. What's the first animal you get? I think he's right. Chickens is first.

Really? Start with the chickens, then the donkeys. I don't want to worry about coyotes. I'd get goat. That's why you get the donkeys. That's why you get the donkeys. A shotgun. Coyotes and...

Oh, yeah. Coyotes, wild hogs. Oh, dude, those wild hogsis, wild hogs. Oh, dude, those wild hogs. Barrel hogs. They're like no joke. Oh, they're bad. Remember we watched the video Black Hog Down? Yeah.

It was awesome. It was not what I thought it was going to be. Yeah. Just lighting them up. They're invasive species. They're motherfuckers. They'll get you, too. Oh, yeah, they'll get you.

There's some invasive species in New Orleans right now, like some kind of rat-beaver hybrid that lives in the swamps or some shit. A nutria, right? Is that what it is? Yeah, the nutria. Oh, yeah, nutria. It's a beaver without a beaver tail. Right.

What is it? It's a nutria. It's a swimming rat. It's an aquatic rat. It's aquatic? Does it go on land, too? Oh, yeah. Can we look one up?

I saw one climb out of a swale there. They used to kill them for their pelts, and they would make fur coats out of their pelts, but then it was unethical to do that, and so now you can't kill them, and now they're an infestation. They're beaver-sized rats. So now you can kill them not for their pelts

just to show that you killed a nutria. Whoa. Now they're getting nothing out of killing them. It's like the most invasive animal in the U.S. Like what's the one thing? Asian carp? Oh, the carp. Those just take over.

The lionfish is very invasive down in Florida. They were telling me in Chicago they had to redo the whole water system. Yeah, they had to reverse it. Yeah, the Asian carp. The one that jumps out of the water? Yeah. Did you see a video of it? No, I've seen it, yeah.

What about those little butterflies, those new ones? Those red-ass bugs? Oh, the lantern flies? They were freaking out about those for a while. What happened to the... Oh, yeah, I remember that we had one in here. Did we have some killer hornets coming in a couple years ago? I think they were to counteract the lantern flies.

I remember the hornets. I'm worried about these rat-sized beavers. Nutria. Can we look up... Yeah, look at them. Look at the nutrias. Oh, feral. I remember the hornets. I'm worried about these beaver, rat-sized beavers. Nutria. Can we look up? Yeah, look at them. Look at the nutrias. Oh, those are cute. Kind of cute.

I don't mind. They're not cute at all. I don't mind. They're cute as fuck. I think it's cute. Do they bite people? I saw one when I was in Mississippi. Yeah, he's got like an old Scottish accent.

Yeah. But they eat the bog. Oh. Why do they have red teeth? Ew, no. I don't like the red teeth. Do they invade? Oh. Oh. Those aren't cute. No. Oh, they have tails?? Ew, no. I don't like the red teeth. Do they invade homes?

Those aren't cute. No. They have tails? It's all in the tail. Are they invading homes? No. Oh. River rats.

They're bigger than I thought. They're monsters. I hate them. I would murder the fuck out of one of those things. They used to. They used to eat them. He says hunting giant marsh rats for food. Oh, well, if that guy wants to eat them, he can eat them. I don't think they eat them much anymore.

This one here is coming right to us. What an idiot. Oh. Nutrients. This kind of seems mean. Well, it's easy as hell, but they're... Some people are just chasing. Oh, fuck.

They said they're going to, like, ruin the. Oh, fuck. They said they're going to ruin the swampland. They're going to eat holes in the swampland. And it'll just drift away if there's a hurricane. Kind of feels like the, what's that wagon game we play where you just go around shooting stuff out in the wild? That seems ideal.

Yeah, good catch. Whoa. Damn. That's so fucking gross. They shock the river for Asian carp and like kills all the Yeah, good catch. Whoa. Damn. Fucking gross. I did get that one. They shock the river for Asian carp and, like, kills all the fish at once. That's wild. Shocking a river? You just got to do it.

Is it like how you shock a pool with chemicals, or is it like electric? No, I think it's electric. Oh. Yeah. Really? Yeah. Doesn't that kill everything? Oh, my God.

It's insane. Holy shit. That was a perfect edit. Dude, he's funny. So funny. Putting the candy bar on that minion's head. On the kid's head. That's, I think, my favorite video of all time.

For Halloween, when they were trick-or-treating at the White House, this kid was like an inflatable minion, and Trump didn't know where to put the candy bar. Oh, he put it on his head, yeah. Did you see the writer's strike is happening again? What is that? What's going on? It's pay. Their pay is down like 23% since like

compared to like what it should be, but they're also working in a regulation for AI-righted scripts. Oh. Yeah. Are you striking, Ron? Yeah, that's why I had to freestyle my shit to Sass. I haven't written down anything all day.

Because you are part of the union, right? I am. Are you a part of the union? Yeah. I got emails this morning. Guess what I got an email for this morning? What? Writing jobs.

Scab? Yeah. I'm not doing it. Who emailed you? This guy reached out. Damn. You should see what job it is. No.

It's right for Kimmel or some shit. Dude, what if it's... You want to be a scab? Who gives a fuck? You're not getting paid by them. You're not part of that union. What if it's the Game of Thrones show? The Game of Thrones show?

I'd do it. Read what? I don't know. This would be a good time to do the KB job search. You could become a scab. Write an entire season five. What if you write something incredible and they're like, we don't need the writers anymore.

Nick will hold up Hollywood by himself. It was weird timing. They were like, hey, there's a lot of writing positions available for like, if you want to be on retainer. Yeah, you can't be a scab.

These union busting writers with like fucking Buddy Holly glasses and Spider-Man shirts on. So, Ron, are you going to

pick it? Are you going to get the big rat? There's literally, there was a 130 picket outside of like, what was it,

5th and 45th or something like that. Nice. But they're picketing. Our local rep is reaching out. He's like, well, I didn't think it was going to happen. I was hoping for a deal until the last second, but we just have to stand in solidarity. The main thing is their pay hasn't adjusted for streaming, right?

So there's so much more consumption. Yeah, that makes sense. I think they used to get paid based on, like, shows that would get run on television. Or just, like, Netflix sending out DVDs in the mail. Yeah. Think about the executives. Yeah. People were saying that, like, in 2007 or 8, whenever it happened the first time, like, TV sucked.

Yeah. They didn't realize that. TV fell off. It killed seasons of some great shows. Yeah. Office season four is only 14 episodes, 11 episodes. Is that why? Yeah.

I feel like if you are a scab, you probably get completely rejected from fucked forever. Yeah. Right? Yeah. They would never hire you anywhere else. Just got to get a fake name. Sam Clemens was a scab. Then he just flipped the script on everybody.

I don't know. SNL's done. Really? Three episodes left. I was reading from writers of top shows, and I always thought they made a lot of money, and they were like, we're barely getting by. They make nothing, and they have the top shows in the country.

That's what I was saying to Rome, but Rome was saying that's not true. When I started, I was making like $3,100 a week. Oh, shit. So that's good. So then they prorate it for like, say, 16 weeks of a show, and that's base level salary. And that was probably like 10 years ago. I don't think it's gone up. Or like eight years ago or something like that.

But it goes up every year on scale. So it's like if you're a five-year writer, you're probably making like $5,000 a week over the life of the show. That's a ton of money. I don't know. I guess, yeah, over the span of the show. I mean, you don't have constant work. It's like for the people – because you might say you write for one show,

and then you're working for 16 weeks, and then for the other whatever 30 weeks of the year, you don't necessarily have jobs. You can get other jobs but I think that's why the union exists. I think that's why SNL is pretty low paying right? I think like the cast only gets paid like $4,000

a show. Yeah I wish some of these tweets I was like oh damn I thought. Yeah. But then they don't have them. They only have like what like 10 episodes a season? 4,000% for all of them. Way more than 10 episodes. You think? Yeah, they run from September to May. But they take a lot of off weeks.

There's a lot more than 10, though. It's got to be, yeah. They'll sell a season of it, and it's like 22, 23 episodes. The 2007 writer's strike saved Jesse Pinkman. He was supposed to die at the end of season one of Breaking Bad. Oh, shit. The writer's strike happened and they, he, you know, there's no... He's just alive.

That's crazy. What was the AI regulation law you were saying? They're trying to limit the AI that can write scripts. But will AI be able to do, like, creative work? I don't know. With some scripts, they probably just, like, want something. You know what I mean? Like, for some

ideas and networks that don't necessarily care about, care about something being hilarious and they just want it to... You think AI could write a twist? Like a Hallmark movie? I think they could write a Hallmark movie. Yeah, definitely. I'm not saying a Shyamalan movie. Okay. I just want to know if our jobs are ever in jeopardy.

They make it seem like everybody's job is in jeopardy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The guy who created it just quit Google. He's like, I've created a monster, and this is a very bad thing that I've done. Like Robert Oppenheimer? Yeah, you're right. They're at like 20 episodes this season.

Brandon needed that. Yeah, we got it down to the episode. Trying to gotcha me. We're at 23. Trying to gotcha Brandon. No, I just wanted to see how many they had. The standard order of TV is 22 to 24 episodes. Why is that?

It just is. It covers the fall, and then they take a break, and then it comes back February sweeps. They take a break, and then May sweeps. Guys learned television one time. That shit is dead. Learned streaming one time. That shit's hard on the dozen, too, dude.

Any time he's asking me about streaming, I don't know what the heck. I don't know what the heck? What the heck? The heck he's talking about. How'd they come up with the word heck? It was a substitute for hell. I know, but how'd they come up with heck? I think that you're just looking for anything close.

She did it behind. I just fell off. You don't care. See you, Mr. President. Put it in the bag. Your sister. Your sister's definitely not giving it back. Oh, it's a king size.

From Prez. They probably have that framed. That's what helped me house hunting in Chicago. I looked up the top trick-or-treating neighborhoods. Oh, smart. And I was like, my heat map. I was like, all right. That is smart. Yeah. was like, my heat map. I was like, alright. That is smart. Yeah.

Who's giving out king size? Whoever Brandon isn't. Anti-trick-or-treating. Yeah. Don't go there. One less house. Yeah. Is there a food that tastes, or a candy that tastes better in non-fun size? So like the king size

or regular size tastes way better than the fun size? Because I would argue Reese's tastes better in fun size. Good question. Fun size being just a single cup? Well, Reese's cups are all the same, right? The tiny one. I'd agree with you there. I think the Reese's fun size,

is it more successful than the actual Reese's bar? Probably is. Who likes the fun size more than the regular cup? I like the thinness of the cup. I like the fun size more than the regular cup? I like the thinness of the cup. I like the fun size more than the regular cup. I do, too. What is the fun size? The individual with the gold.

You like that better? I don't. I think it's a texture thing. I've never bought the big one. I like the cup. I've never bought the big one. I like the cup. Come on, bro.

Come on now. Come on. Come on now. Skittles, maybe? A whole pack of Skittles is a lot. A lot of Skittles. It's a lot of Skittles is a lot. A lot of Skittles. It's a lot of Skittles. A lot of Skittles.

You really kind of have to like, it's kind of hard work. I'm going to move for Skittles. I'm going to move for Skittles. What's Atlanta doing with Skittles? They got to be doing something crazy with them. Something new. Like Mr. Goodbar. I've never bought a regular size one, but I can eat like 50 small ones.

I think Twix might be better, full size. Yes. Just because the fun size is a little bit too small. Yeah. Very interesting. Something they don't make, there's not small paydays, are there? No. Payday sucks.

I love payday. Paydays are phenomenal. Payday's my airplane candy bar. Me too, I had a payday on Sunday. It's the one with the are phenomenal. Payday's my airplane candy bar. Me too. I had a Payday on Sunday. It's the one with the peanuts. Yeah, that's my airplane candy bar. For some reason, it feels healthy. You're like, this is a protein bar.

Sucks. Payday's delicious. Sucks. What is it? Nougat? Oh, it's caramel and peanuts. You know what's good? You know what's real good?

It's a score bar. That's good, too. Is that the Heath? Damn good. Yeah, it's like a Heath bar. Nougat kind of sounds like a slur. Score bars used to scare me as a kid. Wasn't there like a big face as their logo?

I don't know. I think it just says score. Okay, I was afraid of some sort of candy bar logo as a baby. There's a smaller child. That makes sense. You were afraid of a candy? The logo on it. I think there was a candy bar that had a face.

I don't think score had a face. I'm probably making stuff up then. Did Rolo have a face? Rolo didn't have a face. Oh,'t think Score had a face. I'm probably making stuff up then. Did Rolo have a face? Rolo didn't have a face. Rolo Tony. Rolos suck. Rolos don't suck either. What's wrong with you? Reasons are way better than Rolos. You don't like caramel. I like Rolos. I'm not a big caramel guy. What?

Yeah. Everything you don't like has caramel in it. I bought a bag of caramel creams two days ago. Grab one on the way out. Swear to God I don't. Nobody dislikes Rolos. Rolos sell about a handful quickly. Didn't you say you like cow tails, Big Cat?

No. I like cow tails. I like a strawberry cow tail. No. It's a cow tail. I like a cow tail. You've never had a cow tail? Go to an old general store down in Mississippi. Yell at me. Your family probably handled it. I don't know what a cow tail is. I an old general store down in Mississippi. Yell at me. Oh, yell at me. Your family probably like hand- I don't know what a cow tail is.

I apologize. It's more of a northern gas station market. I don't know what it is. It's just like taffy. God, I love a cow tail. It's like the best- It's a caramel cream. You've now had four best treats.

Caramel and cream. I love all the treats. Does anybody like Mary Jane's? Those were always just broken in the bottom of my candy drawer for two Halloween's past. That's some whaling shit. Oh. You ever had a Mary Jane? You just need to stop.

You don't know this because you don't trick-or-treat. I've had Mary Jane. No, I've trick-or-treated before. When was the last time? Why would your kids like free candy? Something awful must have happened. Think about them. What's a cow tail?

It's a Mary Jane. Hook them up. Cow tail? Should have sent Steven the links the day before so we could have him ready. Cow tails are good. Good. Chico sticks are sneaky good. Oh, those weird me out.

Oh, they're so good. Coconut and peanut butter. I've never seen that in my life. You never, like, go to a general store with? Like, I would go. I've never seen that in my life. Oh, they're so good. I'm going to get some right after this.

I'll grab you some. Where are you going to get it? Probably Duane Reade nah they're probably hard to find around here bodegas that seems like a bodega thing

does actually I think they do sell them at the bodega right next to the office you know what makes me nuts I love big crunch bars

but half the time the chocolate like at the bodegas the chocolate's like that white where it's melted and then remelted again like a dog turd

yeah them and Carmelo bars half the time the chocolate's like fucked up in it's melted and then remelted again. Like a doctor. Yeah. Them and Carmelo bars. Half the time the chocolate's like fucked up in a way. Yeah. I've never had a troblerone. Oh, they're so good. You're so poor you can't even

put them in. Yeah, I've never had one. I don't know what it is. They're not good. They're so good. It's literally just chocolate. It's just the packaging and makes you feel fancy.

Oh, they're the best. Good chocolate though. I think it's Belgian chocolate. I think it's a little bit creamier. Why does Belgium have good chocolate? They're cows? What else are they going to have? I feel like Toblerones are almost exclusively available in airports and duty-free shops.

I don't think I've seen them. So Mary Jane's just a... They suck. Straight. Just a Tootsie Roll. A rip-off. Or maybe Toblerone's Swiss because they're shaped like mountains. Oh.

Mary Jane's are good. I don't know. That's something that's better fun. Well, where's Mount Toblerone? Tootsie Rolls. That sounds Italian. Tootsie Rolls definitely. Wait.

It means bear, does it not? Because there's a bear in the logo. No one's going to the store and buying Tootsie Rolls. What's the, Tootsie Roll has big ones? Oh, yeah. What's a Toblerone look like? I buy Tootsie Rolls. I buy the king size giant.

It's like a giant log. Oh, I've seen those. Yeah, they're rectangles. I love Tootsie Rolls. I'm going to look up a Toblers. Tootsie Rolls tastes like vegan chocolate. Yeah. It's not normal chocolate.

It's like chocolate flavor. Toblerone has a pattern like Pollywog. It's been good yakking. Okay. Really? Yeah. Who are they now? Pollywog being one of the Pokemon. You got a Pollywog? Toblerones are so good. What the fuck is Maureen? Yeah. Who are they now? Pollywog being one of the Pokemon. You got a Patti-Lack Pollywog? Mm-hmm.

That's what- Pokemon's are so good at it. I got a pattern like that. Who the fuck is Maureen? Why'd she get that? Find her. It's a Maureen pod. Yeah, someone find me her name.

Well, $126. I think it's Maureen. Pollywog. Damn, Maureen. Pollywog, like from Gullah Gullah Island? Oh, you're thinking of Pollywag, the Pokemon. Shit, I kind of want to buy one of these. Pollywag?

Yeah. Damn. Yeah. That was Wag? Yeah. Damn. Yeah. That was 20 minutes wasted. You've been looking stuff up? You've been looking up Pokemon now? Should we get one that says the yak and you have to eat a whole token of Mega Log on that? Polly Wag?

Polly Wag. Fuck! Did you just attempt to get Nick with the Pokemon fact? I did. I did. Come on. How else am I supposed to respond? Be foolish now.

Be a dum-dum. He's fighting for my attention. I'm like Sherry Martell. You're like fucking Shawn Michaels and Rick Martell, 92, SummerSlam. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. It's 92, right? Yeah.

Yeah. Turn the lock back. Hank is calling me out to do an interview. Jesus. You got some big interviews today, huh? Well, PFT's schedule is kind of fucked, so we have to basically do everything on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

What is this package by your foot? Oh, fuck! Oh! I forgot. I figured it would come in an envelope. Want to do the ad first? Need a blade? Do the ad real quick, and then I got to run.

I can't. Can you give me a blade? This is a night. The box is open. Can someone do the... The box is open. Oh, it is. What is this?

Ron, will you do the high noon ad? Of course. High noon. If you are a tequila lover... There he is. ...who is never satisfied with malt and hard seltzer offerings, you're going to love the new High Noon Tequila Seltzer.

Premium hard seltzer made with real tequila and real juice. You guys already knew that. You got to taste it to experience the clean finish. There's different dimensions to it. That's right. That's right. Unlike this. Unlike this flat-ass hoodie.

Why is it so flat? He bought a 2D hoodie. Clean finish made with real Blanco tequila. Only 100 calories, gluten-free, no added sugar. Tastes unparalleled to the flavors. It's now available nationwide. Four bright, crisp flavors. Strawberry, lime, grapefruit, and passion fruit.

And I'm passionate about it. I knew tequila seltzer is great for the outdoors, especially around the pool, lake, beach, golfing, and tailgating. Look for them at Drizzly or at your local convenience store or visit highnoonspirits.com. DJ, it's actually kind of works. Wait, Kyle, stand up. Stand up real flat.

Oh, my God kind of works. Wait, Kyle, stand up. Stand up real flat. Oh, my God. Yeah. Wait. Oh, my God. Kyle, what happened? It's like you're in Tron. It's kind of cool. It definitely was Chinese sizes.

Look at the little drawstrings that come down from the head. I know. Can I say what we're all thinking? Yeah, that's pretty cool. Yeah, that's yours. I think it fucking sucks. Yeah, it's terrible. Come on.

He just put it on. Yeah, that's fucking awesome. Wait a minute. No, when your arms are straight down. Do a 180. You got to go prank some people. Let's see from the back. Let's see it from the back. Let's see it from the back.

Go have a good interview. Where's he going? Look. Look. He's way too jacked. He's way too jacked for it. He's too big. Flat-ass Kyle.

Going to the Proud Boys. That was not a good enough reaction. Like they've never seen a 2D man before. Yeah, what? That's the most animated I've ever seen, Jack. You know? Are you getting excited? For Iceland?

Yeah. Yeah, I am excited. I'm a little not looking forward to, so it's not that long of a flight, so I'm going to get in at like midnight New York time. Yeah. But it's going to be 6 a.m. there. Ooh. Wait, no. 5 a.m.? You've got to drug yourself for the plane. Yeah. Sleep it's going to be 6 a.m. there. Ooh. Wait. 5 a.m.? You've got to

drug yourself for the plane. Yeah. Sleep on the whole flight. Yeah, maybe. I don't have any drugs. Somebody. Go outside. I should be able to just get you an over-the-counter sleep thing and be fine. Take some Ozempic. I don't want to be super sleepy when I get there because I'm going to have to do shit. There's Ozempic in the fridge at all

times. Yeah? Take a little stab of Ozempic. It's a shot,. Yeah? Take a little stab of Ozempic. It's a shot, right? Yeah. Take a stab of Ozempic. It is Joey's needle, though, so you... 50-50 at best. I'd be losing weight another way. Losing weight's losing weight.

I mean, I really don't... Yeah. If you have AIDS to losing weight, that helps. Already prepped for it, for sure. Yeah! Well. What are you doing, Brandon? Helps. Already prepped for it for sure. Yee-hee-hee-hee! Hell. What are you doing, Brandon? Brandon, you know who Kurt Karai is?

No. Yeah, you do. Who is it? Kurt Karai? A volleyball player? Arch Karai. Arch Karai. I know who Arch Karai is.

Who is it? He's a volleyball player from the fucking mid-90s. Him and... Like Olympian? Yeah, but he was the swaggiest. He always wore this pink Speedo hoodie. Then he had a teammate who had spiked blonde hair. Maybe he had the spiked blonde hair.

It just looked so perfect for the 90s, and I was looking for, like, Kirk Karai merch or memorabilia. I'm saying Karch. You keep saying Karch. Karch saying Kirk. You keep saying Kirk. Kirk. Kirk. Kirk Karai. Kirk or Karch?

Kirk. I don't say that. Kirk. Is it Kirk? Kirk Karai. Who was his teammate that had the spiky blonde hair? Like Simmons or something? How sweet is that picture, bro?

Oh, yeah, this guy's pure 90s. He's a legend. Holy shit. Oh, with the pink hat? It was his signature pink hat. I just wanted a Kirk Karai merch and there's just a couple things on Oh damn.

Wait, that can't be real. That's not real. No, that's him. That's what he looked like. Definitely not. What's y'all's favorite movie about volleyball? Top Gun. Yeah. Top Gun. Yeah. Top Gun Maverick. Isn't it weird that they've never

hardly made one? Yeah. There's movies about everything. Side Out, I guess, is the only one. You name of just any women's beach

volleyball player? Yeah, Carrie Walsh and Jennings. What about May Trainer? I've seen May Trainer. Yeah, right? Yeah.

It was Carrie Walsh. Yeah. Carrie Walsh, Carrie Walsh, Jennings. That's the same person? Misty May Trainer. Yeah, right? It was Kerry. Yeah. Kerry Walsh. Kerry Walsh Jennings. That's the same person. Oh, Kerry Walsh. Kerry Walsh Jennings. Misty May.

Misty May Trainer. Correct. They both got married, but they both hyphenated. Yeah. I think Misty May Trainer did it first. Misty May Trainer was the shorter one. Yes. And Kerry Walsh was the taller blonde.

And they dominated. It was the only two I can name. They did Sydney, Athens, Beijing. Yes. They might have done name. They did Sydney, Athens, Beijing. Yes. They might have done London. Did they do London? Somehow they were playing against. Brandon, can you name an Olympic wrestler?

Rulon Gardner. Okay. Freestyle. Kurt Angle. Hi, it's me. Yeah. Yeah. Am I calling you?

Yeah. What? Hi, it's me. Yeah. Yeah. Am I calling you? Yeah. What? Hi, it's me. People got their phone numbers and are calling them from each other. I don't know how that works either. Oh, they're using that fucking app? Yeah. That's so annoying.

Yeah. It would be funny if you were in different places and they could listen in on your conversation and your confusion. But knowing you are in the same place, it completely removes any novelty to this joke. And they can just hear our conversation now. Yeah. That's true. On the waves of YouTube. Damn, what a lame thing to do.

Yeah. I don't mind. At least I killed the moment. Yeah, you do. I don't dude I had someone do that to me and I would wake up with like 10 minute voicemails from one of my buddies at like 4am

and it took us like a long time to realize what was happening it wasn't your buddy no he wasn't calling me another person that I was friends with was calling me was calling us doing that to us. Ah, yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

That's weird as fuck. Super. But that hoodie looks good, though. It keeps making me laugh. Yeah, I don't know. You're too jacked for it. I think I didn't want to say it. You're way too jacked for it.

It's making you look more jacked. It's making you look more slender. Throw it on Clemmer. Okay, yeah. Yeah. It'll hang better on him. It's making you look more jacked. Throw it on Clemmer. Okay, yeah. It'll hang better on him. It's already flat. Just text him. Tell him to come in.

It's going to envelop him, though. Talk about a guy with a walk. Clemmer's got to walk. He does have a walk. It's like a lope. Seeing jacked-ass Kyle walking next to Clemmer. It's like Saturn and Moppy. The Fruit Loops.

What is it? What were they? Were those two little animated? The Apple and the... No, that's Apple Jacks. Apple Jacks. Cinnamon. I feel like Apple Jacks really fell off.

I love Apple Jacks. I love them too, and I haven't had them in forever. Size differences between two dudes are always funny, and between two women is never funny. Oh, it's gross. It's true. It's not even gross, you just can't even have an opinion on it. People were mad that the 1,000th Pokemon looks like the cinnamon from Apple Jacks.

They should have done something cooler. How many people are mad about that? Probably a lot. Probably like millions. Jason, people are mad about that? Probably a lot. Probably like millions. Jason, you mad? No. I thought you had my back, bitch. You didn't say you were mad.

I was pissed. That's the thousandth Pokemon. He's more mad about the dragon. Phantom of the Opera closing. The Opera closed? Come on now. Phantom of the Opera on Broadway. Phantom of the Opera.

That's a bad thousandth Pokemon. That is bad. That's bad. After all those years, and that's your one thousandth. What's its secret power? It's made of coins. Oh. I love that fucking play.

Do you really? Yeah. It's good as hell. You got to go with Jenks. My high school did a reenactment of it. Christine Daier. The Phantom of the Opera. You just can't wear any hoodies.

You're about to go into surgery or something. Square up to the camera. Square up to the camera for the people like that. That's a shitty hoodie. It's a shitty hoodie. A shitty hoodie.

Shit hoodie. Maybe you put the hood up. Is that a Gordon Gartrell? Why are you doing a funny walk, though? Yeah, I was kidding. I was pranking you. I was pranking you. The technology is not there.

What are you doing? About to dive into the trash can? Nick has this theory that I look like a Pixar character. You look like if like a Pixar character. You look like if in a Pixar movie something flew by the screen and the neighbor was taking out the trash and it went so fast it ripped the bottom of the trash bag out.

Yes, that's, yes. If that was ever in a Pixar film, you look exactly like that. Ready? Yeah. So something whirs by, the bottom of your trash bag rips out. Yeah.

That's your celebrity lookalike, Clemmer. All right, now, I mean, what are we doing with the trash can now? I mean, we got this lobster. Well, you don't have to put it back in. You know what I mean? I kind of want to look like you're just going to leave it. I want that to be your hoodie. I want you to wear it every day like a cartoon.

Clemmer loves that 2D hoodie. Why? It should be your hoodie. I want you to wear it every day like a cartoon. Clemmer loves that 2D hoodie. Why? It should be your hoodie. What better clothes are you wearing? Well. Oh, come on. That's exactly what a cartoon character said. Didn't Pinocchio say that verbatim? I'm a real man.

Pinocchio fucking said that. I'm not a cartoon. I'm a man. Is that good? Did I do my job? I think a couple more weeks of this. A couple weeks. We know Kehoe fucking said that. I'm not a cartoon. I'm a man. Is that good? Did I do my job? I think a couple more weeks of this. A couple weeks. We need you to lose some weight.

I don't think that's a good idea. You need 10 pounds. Well, that's what I weighed when I got hired. So I was 10 pounds lighter. Oh, really? You gained some weight. I go back and watch the mini golf thing, and I'm even scrawnier and skinnier somehow than I am now. Okay.

It's what anxiety does to you. I did the same thing to me. I lost a lot of weight when I first started. I need some of that anxiety. Mental ozempic. It's great. All right. Is that it?

Is that all you boys needed? Get back to Phantom of the Opera. Who's going to see it? Was he pissed to have to do that? No, he wasn't. I just think that's the operating procedure for him. Look at him go. Still wearing the sweatshirt.

Yeah. They're getting a picture? Oh, yeah. Connor Griffin's all over it. Whoever that may be. Well, I did like that we all sprang to his defense on Twitter, though. I let it go. You did, too?

I didn't get around to it. In sleep he came to me. No, I was saying in sleep he sang to me. In sleep he sang to me. What was that musical line we were singing? 49-day, 49- Day, 49 Day, 49 Day. 49 Day, 49 Day. Your recommendation, I watched it.

That was the worst shit ever. Dude, that movie's awesome. I thought it sucked. 49 Day, 49 Day, 49 Day. 49 Day, 49 Day. What was it? About the guy that wrote Rent. A musical about the guy that wrote Rent.

About the guy that wrote, okay. Dude, that soundtrack, I A musical about the guy that wrote Rent? Dude, that soundtrack. I love musical soundtracks. Think of me. Think of me fondly when you say goodnight. You know what sets me off and makes me want to murder?

What? Little British girl musical voices. Sometimes it's good to be a little bit naughty. I get into a fit of rage when I hear that. What is that, Matilda or Annie? I'm sitting yourself. Wait, what about, what's the pickpocket one? Got a pickpocket or two.

Hey, what is that from? Oliver Twist. Yeah, yeah. You will buy. We should put on a musical. Yeah. Set something up. We should write on a musical. Yeah. We should write a musical, really. I guarantee we could get that bitch on Broadway.

They put whatever on Broadway. Kate, you were saying that bad Cinderella is like, people are still lining up. People are going to hate watch it because it's so bad. Part of the family. Part of the family. Serve him some cockroaches served in a canister. Part of the family.

Serve him some cockroaches served in a canister. Makes me want to rip my clothes off. I love that shit, dude. I don't know if I hate it or love it. You love it and you want to hate it, but you love it. It's addictive. What about the Von Trapp children? I love when my cat bites me.

Like, do a deer, a female deer. Or the Peppa Pig shit. A drop of golden sun. That's another bad thing. Peppa Pig, like a little British voice. Yeah. They're bad voices on Peppa Pig. Yeah, I don't like those.

Nick, you really didn't like Tick, Tick, Boom? I thought it was the worst shit. It is the worst shit. Why are you describing it like that? I thought it was the worst shit It was the suckiest worst shit Suckiest Dude, Andrew Garfield won like best actor for that I think

Yeah, it stunk Dude, I mean it was amazing That's why you can't respect the writer's strike You're right That's what these people are writing Yeah, I do love musicals Musicals are awesome I need like a condensed version That's what these people are writing. Yeah, I do love musicals. Voting for it. Musicals are awesome.

I need like a condensed version. The Phantom of the Opera is here. I need a reprieve. That's what the reprieve is. They just like play all the songs in like eight minutes. Yeah, I would like that. I need a nice reprieve. I think there's a ton of leeway for musicals because it can have shitty dialogue because it's a musical, but it can have shitty songs because it's dialogue. So it can suck. That's the same.

Every part can suck. Yeah. Like, if you look at the Book of Mormon, that's like the funniest musical of all time. And it's like kind of funny. It was. Yeah, it was just not hilarious. It's like kind of funny, but it's pretty funny for a musical. Pretty funny.

Think that we put our minds together about the musical about construction workers trying to stop saying homophobic things. Oh, that's so funny. Because then think about the songs that you can write before. It's just an idea that we, yeah. Dude, yeah, just like a hefty construction worker trying to stop. Yeah, but like early on. Like the songs, like rhymes lead into saying stuff. Yeah.

Fuck. You guys are smart as hell. He finds out someone he loves in his life is gay and that's he's no the new guy on the job site oh and so he's got on the job site they do like the singing voice you're envisioning of they're like cleaning off graffiti there's like i hate when people tag it it would be a whole that would be like the whole song and you'd be able to get away with that song being existing because the musical is about stopping

saying it yeah it's like the biggest loophole of all time I've had this idea festering but I didn't know anyone would be

on board with it what do you got KP I see the fucking wheels turning yeah I like this idea I love this idea job site the musical wow

that's such a good idea dude it's like actually a good idea and like it opens up they're all sitting there with their lunch pails just whistling at women, but then the whistling comes in different harmonies.

Yeah, good cat call. And then the ladies do a dance. It's like a dance scene with the hot ladies. A lot of the dudes are Mexican. So what are some generic cat calls? Like, hey, dutch. Hey, dutch. Nice pussy.

Yeah, yeah. That's a good one. Thank you. I'm always throwing that one out. Women love it. Yeah, baby. Dutz, nice pussy. Yeah, yeah. That's a good one. Thank you. I'm always throwing that one out. And women love it. Yeah, that's my guilty pleasure. And nice pussy. And nice pussy.

TJ, I'm just not doing anything. I was, like, Wim Hof-ing today. Yeah? I don't know if it works right. You keep saying that, and I don't know what it is. You said it twice today. What? How long did you do that?

How long did you go? 30 seconds? 30 of the breasts, then, like, don't know what it is. You said it twice today. What? How long did you go? 30 seconds? 30 of the breaths, then the hold, two holds, and then four cycles. Dude, the hold. You didn't feel good at the hold? I said I felt good afterwards. Oh, I thought you said it didn't work. Oh, I think it did, but I hate saying I think it did.

Dude, the hold is like your whole body just starts melting. I didn't achieve that. Really? I've gotten to like a pins and needly point, but I feel like the hold's not that. I get to the pins and needly point when I'm doing the, what's it called, the hyperventilating. And then when I do the hold, all of it goes away. It feels so good. Really?

Yeah. Huh. We sound like such losers. I know goes away. It feels so good. Really? Yeah. Huh. We sound like such losers. I know. Bro. Sucks. Taking care of our mental health. It's like Kundalini yoga.

You ever try that? No, what the hell is Kundalini? It's yoga, but the whole time you're like, you're like working yourself into hyperventilation. Really? Tried it once and I felt like a giant weirdo. I did goat yoga, which is just playing with goats. They were cute goats. They were cute as fuck.

What, did they climb on top of you when you were doing downward dog and shit? Yeah, they were actually really cool. I can't do the Wim Hof anymore because hyperventilating makes me have panic attacks. Yeah. So I came to a stop pretty quick. Actually, I did it twice.

Then I was like, yeah, this is too much for me. It doesn't make me. I have. I hyperventilate when I have panic attacks. I was borderline panic attack this morning when I woke up because my first thought for some reason was you're going to die one day. Shit. That's true.

No one's getting out of here. In terms with your own. Yep. At least you said to yourself one day and not today. Today is one day. Every day is one day. Fuck. God damn it, Nick. If you could know,

would you want to know or not? Like how and when? I know how. How? I wouldn't want to know. No, fuck no. I wouldn't hate to know no fuck no I wouldn't hate knowing because what if they're like 95 what if they're like 22

what if it's just vague and it's just like it gives you a one word of how you'll die bad yikes usually we only go one word we're going two words it's real bad that's all we can say humiliating Usually we only go one word, we're going two words. It's real bad. What?

That's all we can say. Humiliating? Yeah. What does that mean? Gruesome yet humiliating. Sticky, what? Fuck. Long.

Long, painful. It's sad that my biggest fear is humiliation out of all of those things. A humiliating death? Yeah. That's what I'm the most afraid of in life. What is the most humiliating death? Being scared to death? I don't know. Boo! Yeah, probably. That's gotta be it. I think it would be worse.

Imagine the humiliation. Doesn't that happen? Like a kid will like scare their grandparent and then they just like die yeah that's not humiliation

yeah I would be humiliated if I killed my fucking oh dude I'd be like I'm good at fucking scaring the guys that die beating off

yeah like those yeah but I mean how often what does that happen twice ever I took a class it happened to my neighbor I took like a forensic

that was one of Pittsburgh's top. He went to the murder scenes and figured out shit. He's like, you would not believe how many people accidentally die jerking off while they suffocate themselves. He said that's like... Must be awesome. I mean, a great way to go.

That shit is disturbing. You think the family... I feel like if that was my job, I just would do a kindness to that person and be like. It was drugs. It was drugs, yeah. You guys never knew. Yeah.

Did you guys ever watch True Detective? That post-nut clarity has to be insane. It's like, you nut, and you're just like, that was amazing. You're just like. You're in heaven. Just like hanging. I don't know. What was the show? That's what F Thief. know. What was the show?

That's what if they... What? What was the... Not True Detective. What's the other one? Like about all the serial killers. CSI, Law and Order. No, the one that's not...

There's a hundred. The one that's not coming back. They had two seasons. People loved it. Mindhunter? Yeah, Mindhunter. Yeah. Did you watch that?

Yes. You see like when the BTK killer is doing that and his wife walks in on him and he's wearing like a bra and shit. Yep. He's watch that? Yes. You see like when the BTK killer is doing that and his wife walks in on him and he's wearing like a bra and shit. Yep, yep. He's suffocating himself. And then she's like, all right, you're sleeping on the couch for the next week.

Yeah. Okay, goofball. I would have been like, we're fucking, you're out of here? Yeah. I always forget this. My Saudi Arabian roommate, sophomore year,

would like beat himself with a belt. Like while he was getting off? Sexually? It's the same one that was showing you. Yeah, and he told me that, and he showed me pictures of mutilated babies. I can't believe I just let that. I was so content with it. Well, what are you going to do, intervene? I don't know.

I always think, what should I have done? How did you end up with him? My roommate, who I was friends with, dropped out mid-semester. Damn. He would beat himself because of what he showed you? He would do that sexually. He told me. who I was friends with dropped out mid-semester. He would beat himself because of what he showed you? He would do that sexually. He told me. Who were you to stop him from getting off?

I didn't know if I should have just tried to change roommates. That's unsettling. Did he ever do it when you were around? It was one of those dorms with two separate bedrooms. You had a conjoined

bathroom? I never even heard it. He just said by the way. He was really beating off. What a weird thing to tell someone. Yeah he told me.

That's a strange thing to That's probably part of it too. Just a heads up bro. I'm going to be spanking myself later. A belt.

I know a kid who went to Fordham and his freshman year roommate would, like, just jerk off, like, when he was in the same, like. Yeah, my roommate did that. Like, no barrier between them. Like, he would, like, look. You said your roommate did that? My roommate would do that. He would pull his penis out in front of you?

Yeah, you said this before. No, he wouldn't. He would do it at night. I think this guy would do it in broad day. I told you he had an ass. He had a silicone ass. That was crazy. All of a sudden I would just hear a bunch of like ruffle, like shuffling and

shit going on in the closet. Then he would just be fucking something. Like he was fucking. It wasn't like jerking off. It was like the closet. Someone was fucking something. Then he would just get back in bed and go to bed. My friend Marcus, his roommate had like all like the sex straps like above his bed and shit it's just like in a dorm yeah like in a what the fuck that's way weirder yeah had that shit out yeah that shit like and they were the

beds were uh head to head and there was like a big wall between like a temporary wall between the heads of the bed and so he attached all like the sex bondage to his like head of the bed. How do you fucking like my into that shit, dude? Like my buddy Marcus, he was the one that lived there. He thought it was like cool. He was like, yeah, dude, my roommate's such a fucking freak. Would you use it for masturbation or sex? I think for sex.

Who? Where do you even find a girl where you're like, come back to my dorm, we're going to swing. Yeah. Get elevated. Interesting. I don't even know how you get into that kind of thing. There's beginner classes you can take at Brooklyn.

For people who want their life. You have to be the biggest loser to try to get into that. Megan Trainor is real big into it. She was raving about her husband's big cock. That's Juni Cortez from Spy Kids. Really? She went way overboard. They got caught when they first started dating

walking out with this giant sex swing from a store. Now she's just talking about how gigantic his dick is. I mean, that's a real one. We pulled that quote. I believe him. I got to see this guy's is. I mean, that's a real one. We pulled that quote. I believe him. I got to see this guy's cock. I know. I know, I'm a little curious.

Let me see this kid's cock. Dave, when fucking a new Tom Brady picture comes out. All right, let's see it. All right, I got to go do the Pat Pat show. Oh, sorry, guys. Can you snag me some merch? It's 3 o'clock. We should Peck show. Oh, sorry, guys. Can you snag me some merch? It's 3 o'clock. We should probably.

I like it. Oh, shit. It's late. Yeah. We got to do the bracket anyway, so let's wrap it up. All right, guys. Let's see the giant quack. The giant cock quote.

Giant quack. That's a cock quote. A quack. I think if a woman said this about me, I'd be embarrassed. There's a lot to live up to. Yeah. Kind of like a sub-disc. Did we give TJ enough clues to look this thing up?

Yeah, he's very good at this. Who knows what he's finding right now? I've been vaguer, and he's been good. He's very vaguer. In your dreams, he sang to me. Can't see. Can you read it, TJ? It just says huge penis.

I think she was saying something about how she's like screaming and he's like, that's just a joke. It's a lot to take inside and she's considered getting sex therapists and doctors to consult with after trying every quote angle end quote. Huh. She even learned transcendental meditation to open herself up to her husband's member. She's in hell. She's in absolute hell. I thought every woman was always in pain during and after sex.

Oh, she just has a tiny little pussy. She has vaginismus. She's got the itty bitty-ass little pussy. Where's that little pussy? Literally, where? Where? Is it hiding from me? I'm out.

I'm on out. Alright, well, I'll see you guys next week. Be safe, have fun. When are you back? Tuesday. Are you going to have service? I fucking hope so. Have fun. Yeah. When are you back? Tuesday. Nice. Yeah. You going to have service?

Dude, I fucking hope so. I don't know if you will. I don't know. I'm getting, like, one of those, like, a Wi-Fi, like, a hotspot thing. That shit ain't going to work. That's not going to work. All right. That's the Yak.

We're still live, I think. I know. All right. That's the Yak. We're still live, I think. I know. All right, now. It's the act. It's the act. Yeah, it's time to talk shop and do a Yankees pop. It's the act. It's the act.