The Yak - KB is Joining Orange County Choppers | The Yak 12-16-22

Episode Date: December 16, 2022

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Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Hello. Hello. Hello everyone. What up? Rone is back. Good to see you.

What did I miss? Nothing. Nothing. Not a goddamn thing. Actually, nothing has changed since you left. Probably the most boring couple days. Can't think of one thing. Man, that's great, though.

That's always great to not have to catch up. Oh, we did have one thing. kb sandbagged us what that new oregon trail sucks it was our most boring we were an hour in and we're like can we stop this nothing happened and then we realized like wait kb made us fucking play this one he's out here it was it was comically bad i would have rather gone to the neurologist yes neurologist yeah i'm sorry i wouldn't have yes i thought with new technology that he could have they've ruined a perfect game it was like took the soul out of it had to make a million more decisions oh yeah yeah that sucks and like words would fly by that's my issue with video games in general.

They shouldn't be complex. Yeah. It should be three buttons. Every video game should be three buttons. We lived and learned. Yeah, we did. We do a live show every day. Some of them suck.

That one sucked. Oh, the show around them was fine. I would say a few of them suck. That's a good guess. Yeah, yeah. Some, when they suck. Oh, boy. They suck.

I liked it it was titled Oregon Fail that was a good name yeah so what's up everyone I missed you guys I love doing this show

I missed you a lot Ron yeah I love fucking yakking it up where was you were fucking LA talking like my three and a half year old now

so normally too that was every tense I was out in LA with Pat Bev dude he says what's up oh nice he didn't say that a half year old now. That was every tense. I was out in L.A. with Pat Bev, dude. He says, what's up? Oh, nice. He didn't say that. Just to KB or to all of us? Did he answer my question? Yeah, he did. Tune in, yeah.

Well, give me two of them. Ron asked for me to submit a question and I did as Laker Dan doing my Mount Rushmore of Lakers. I saw he put five people on, and one of them was AD. So he basically was trolling like me, but serious. Yeah, he might as well have put his own starting lineup in there. My Mount Rushmore was Shaq, LeBron, Kareem, Nick Van Exel. Ooh.

Is this the first time Laker Dan's appeared? It's been a while. It's been three years since he's made an appearance. Laker Dan is a harbinger of bad things. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Laker Dan and the Mothman are one and the same. One of...

People don't know, the night before Kobe died, which I didn't know was going to happen, LeBron passed him, I think, in all-time points. And I just went on a tweet stream being like, LeBron's the greatest Laker of all time. Five Lakers and didn't rank Kobe. And he died like 12 hours later. And all my tweets were there, and everyone was just,

found the old ones. They were fresh, too. And people were looking for some, people were just Googling Kobe's name and looking for some type of sl googling kobe's name and looking for some type of slander to fucking lay on him yeah i should actually i should actually personally thank ari shafir he kind of helped me with that taking some heat off got you out of that hole legend an absolute legend but you came back though with a vengeance and i think that there's always

room for reconciliation with things like that everyone deserves deserves a second chance, even Laker Dan. Thank you. I appreciate it. And Nick Van Exel was a pretty good Laker there for a couple years. That's quick, right? Yeah. When him and Eddie Jones were on the team together, that's a nice backcourt.

A little pre-Kobe action. Yeah. That's Ced Cibales coming off the bench. Oh, yeah, Cedric Cibales. Didn't he get hurt in like a jet ski accident? Oh, he just went to Mexico and never came back, right? Yeah, something like that. They traded Cedric.

Yeah, it is. Sabalos, too. Cedric Sabalos is an all-time basketball name. Maybe a better name, Eldon Campbell. Not a better name at all, but a good player. That was more of an Eddie Jones. That's a good, solid name. Limus Swede we were talking about last night.

That guy, he should have been better. I had his jersey. Yeah, great name. I know. He was supposed to be the next night That guy, he should have been better I had his jersey Yeah, great name I know, he was supposed to be the next up Yeah, he was next up He also looked like a perfect NFL receiver too He was like 6'6 Limus Swede

That's like a president's name from the late 1800s I think that's a presidential loser's name Yeah, Limus Swede Dewey defeats Limus Van Buren beat Limus Swede. Fuck yeah. Goddamn, that's good. Head of the Whig party.

Who else has gotten to eat steak this week? Everybody ate yesterday. Oh, the burgers were incredible. Delicious. The burgers were the saving grace of the show yesterday. Yeah. Today we got chicken tacos. Oh. Finally got my appetite.

That ain't steak. You can buy them at OmahaSteaks.com. I sure will, Big Cat. Not only do we have delicious steak on Monday, we had delicious burgers yesterday. Today we're going to have incredible chicken. That's all there at OmahaSteaks.com. You can achieve gifting greatness when you give the gift of perfectly all there at omahasteaks.com you can achieve gifting

greatness when you give the gift of perfectly aged tender and delicious omaha steaks their steaks are fantastic but again their burgers their hot dogs which we had the hot dogs a couple days ago we had the chicken we're gonna have the chicken today they have everything and they're all terrific they put together a delicious selection of various gift packages to make shopping easy oh i'm packages to make shopping easy. Oh, I'm sorry. To make shopping for the ones you love easy. I skipped the ones you love part because I don't have any of those.

It's funny. Go to omahasteaks.com and take advantage of 50% off site-wide plus use code YAK at checkout to get an additional $40 off your order. I'll read that again. You go to omahasteaks.com, take advantage of 50% off site-wide right now. Plus, use code YAK at checkout to get an additional $40 off your order. They have everything that you need to give a gift that's simply perfect. You can send an assortment of mouth-watering favorites like the delicious. I'm struggling. Butcher's Cut Filet Mignon.

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You look like you could be working at Orange County Choppers. Oh, yes. Big Paul and Little Paul. Just making the bikes. I got to start dressing like this more often. You look a little Mexican. Big Paul and Little Paul. Just making the bikes. I got to start dressing like this more often. You look a little

Mexican. He does. Thank you. You got a butt in the top. Thank you. I look like probably a bigger, average

sized Mexican. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Those guys are tiny. You look like the tallest man in Pueblo. I need to start chilling with, I

think the more you get down into Central America, you get shorter and shorter. Yeah, why is that? The El Salvadorian, they're like 5'2". Small roofs. Closer to the sun?

Yeah, probably closer to the sun. More gravity at the equator. People get taller to get closer to the sun. Yeah. Warmth. Right, that's why the Norwegians and shit are... I watched Rediscovering America Alaska last night. I was working on a project, so I put it on.

It was... I think it was the best one. I think it was our best one. It was very good. The timing of the drop wasn't the best. It was horrible. If you have four minutes... It was horrible, but I was hooked on it.

What a waste of Alaska. Yeah. Now no one will know. I totally forgot. Oh, shit. That sucks. But it was so, so good. a waste of Alaska yeah now no one will know I totally forgot oh shit that sucks yeah but it was so so good

I the whole hour I I was like oh my god it's done already like good job like that was great

thank you yeah our team that edits they're insane shout them out Rutledge Corey

Chris Soli Alyssa Ags Alyssa yeah its, Alyssa. I laughed out loud multiple times in the LOLs. Sometimes when you're filming, you're just like, I don't know how this is going to be good. They make it really, really good.

They work a lot. It was fantastic. Yeah. The boys were getting messy yesterday. Yeah, they were. You know who was jealous? Andy Cohen, dude. He'll probably offer Rico a Bravo show. That shit was high entertainment. Cohen, dude. He'll probably offer Rico a Bravo show. Yeah, true. That shit was high entertainment.

Oh, yeah. I'm exhausted. I haven't had a day like yesterday in a long time. How would you characterize yesterday for you? Whole internet coming at my neck. Oh, yeah? When was the last time they did that? Probably the Trump.

Laker Dan? Yeah, Laker Dan, Trump. I don't know. It's been a long time. And I do get triggered. I just respond to people. I shouldn't. It's a stupid thing.

What were people saying? People were saying I'm dead to them. They're never listening again. Well, that's just. Let them down. I'm a queen of bullshit. That's crazy. People are just seeing the dramatics and they want in on it.

Yeah, there's a lot of piling on of like, you know. That's my least favorite part about it. Yeah, like one person did a take and then everyone's like, yeah, like let's, I don't want to get all the way back into it, but I I'm pretty consistent in that I like to try to find the good in everyone and root for people to succeed and maybe

that's a fault of mine of giving people too many chances, but my heart is in the right place that I want Rico to get better and I also fully believe Kahn's when he place that I want Rico to get better, and I also fully believe Khan's when he said that he wants Rico to get better. Whatever. Let's make this about me. Yeah. Okay.

I got promoted. What? Second Lieutenant Mantis Army. Oh, hell yes. Yeah, the Jerry reveal just was totally unnecessary, too. He just kind of put himself out there. That's the beauty of Jerry. He's just like totally unnecessary, too. He just kind of put himself out there. That's the beauty of Jerry.

Yeah. He's just like, yeah, I'm one of my top lieutenants. I was like Sass being like, yeah, I slept through the show yesterday. Yeah. You didn't need to say that. You didn't need to hop in the fire there. Everyone else was taking heat. Good for him, though.

I like the idea of having guys. I said on the show. I don't want guys. I don't want guys at all. I got a bunch of lady yak. I said on the show. I don't want guys. Right away. I don't want guys at all. I got a bunch of lady yakkers saying they'd be my guys. Yeah, you should. Oh, you should put together a lady army.

I already got a bunch of DMs of them, and I think we'll do that. We'll just all sync our periods up. Yeah, what are you guys going to do? I don't know. What recipes and shit? If I say something bad, are you guys going to quilt around me? What's a group of ladies going to do? We're going to make you a sandwich.

We're going to. Yeah. Kate, you said you were working on a project last night. That means you were working on your homemade gift for the Yak Exchange. I was up until 2 in the morning. Oh my god. I'm very excited for your gift.

You shouldn't be. Oh, okay. I'm not. I'm more excited for Sass's $500 one. No offense. Someone should be excited for my gift because I literally went to my desk at home and I just went like this into a box. That's the one I want. There are certain things in there that are expensive.

Really? Yeah. Like what? Say one thing that's in there. I didn't realize. No, I don't want to ruin it. All right, all right, all right. Yeah, I don't want to ruin mine either, but it's zero value.

I didn't realize that I bought a $300 radio-controlled mini-boat. Just sitting there. I've always wanted an RC boat. I want to take it to Central Park like Hey Arnold did. Just crash through the little mini-sailboats. Hey Arnold had the exact life I wanted. That boxcar derby he did in the Move Avenger. Yeah, it was...

Dead parents? You didn't watch the movie. What happened? He found his parents. Really? They were dead? I think his parents are alive. Oh, they just abandoned him?

They crashed in the jungle and were lost, right? He had the best room. Yeah, that room was ideal. Hey Arnold, stoop kid. Stoop kid. Afraid to leave the stoop. I'm just getting into 90s cartoons now. He's on a Nick trajectory.

I watched it back. Guys, it's pretty shitty. Oh, it's not. It sucks. Not when he pretends to be crazy and hits himself with a trash can. Don't hit me. I'll hit me. I remember that. What a trash can. Don't hit me. I'll hit me. Yeah. I remember that. What a great show. What you...

You're not too old. You used to be... No, Kate's right in that. No, I'm right in there. What's the cartoon that is like that today? Are they making cartoons like that? I think it's just YouTube accounts. No, yeah, they're not.

I think they... I don't know. SpongeBob's still making new... Kids just watch other kids open toys and play video games. Like Scandinavian pedophiles who dress up in wacky outfits. I watched a couple of those the other day. As a parent, I know I put my son out there from time to time. I cannot imagine making my kid sit at a table and be like,

okay, you can feel the forcing of it. It's so awkward to me. Or what? Oh, the YouTube. The YouTube dads who have like 50 million views. So then I'm like, alright. Maybe I could monetize this child. Something just so like...

Did you guys see LeVar Burton won a Lifetime Achievement Emmy? Oh, he did? Yesterday. I teared up watching. It was beautiful. Well deserved. It's reading Rainbow. A1 guy. For sure. Butterfly in the sky. A one guy.

Those are kind of educational. Sesame Street's educational. Oh, yeah. One of their guys just died. Bob. Bob just died. Big Bird, right? No, Bob.

Non-Muppet in it, right? It was one of them. He played a man. There was Bob, and then there was Gordon back in the 80s. Was he the postman? I guess his name was Bob. He was Bob. What did he do? I don't like this Bob guy. No, Bob from Sesame Street was just Bob.

And he would talk to the Muppets and everything. He just lived on Sesame Street, I guess. He didn't do anything. Because Mr. Hooper died when I was a real young kid. And then Bob took his place. And then there was Gordon. I think Mr. Noodle died of AIDS. Really? I feel like I remember that.

Oh, hey, Mr. Noodle? What? The first one did. Very sad. What was your childhood? I feel like I didn't watch any of this shit. I don't remember any of these people. I didn't watch Sesame Street as a kid. It was more just now.

I watched it when I was a little kid. I did too. I just definitely don't remember any of you looking lost I didn't watch Sesame Street as a kid it was more just now I watched it when I was a little kid I did too I just definitely don't remember any of the I don't get how people remember things they watch

as children I remember everything I watched yeah I just have no memory of it I know I watched it like moments from shows like a catchphrase

from a Hey Arnold episode like you just dropped like that's a I don't know where those neural pathways went for me but they're fucking clogged up don't have like focusing on the now I don't know where those neural pathways went for me, but they're fucking hogged up. That's because you're focusing on

the now. I think it's a cope for Kate, Brandon, and I. When I was eight years old and I didn't have friends and I lived out in the country in a trailer, we only had three channels, but I memorized the entire NBC Thursday through Saturday night lineup, so I could tell you the cast members of Golden Girls, Empty Nest, Dear John,

and all of those failed 80s sitcoms, and I wish I would stop talking now. What would 8-year-old Brandon say if he found out that Mr. Noodle was a gay man? I don't think 8-year-old Brandon would know who Mr. Noodle was, because I'm not sure Mr. Noodle existed when Brandon was 8 years old. Elmo didn't. I also might have made this whole thing up. Elmo came.

Can we fact check Mr. Noodle? Elmo didn't come in a long time. I was like 15. I shared the same birthday as Elmo. Yeah Can we fact check Mr. Deedle? Elmo didn't come in a long time. I was like 15. I share the same birthday as Elmo. Yeah, you said that before. He's not real. I mean, it's like Wikipedia

has got a birthday February 3rd, same as me. You said it like a confession. You're like, I share the same birthday as Elmo. I think he's still alive. No, that's a new one, right? He's perpetually three and a half. All right, I might have made this up. Wait, no, no.

The old one's the one on the left. See that picture? That guy. That guy. Was. He's the one. That's a lot of things. That's the guy from Air Bud, the clown.

I want to make sure. If he didn't die from AIDS, I want to correct this. He played Mr. Noodle's brother, Mr. Noodle. Wait a minute. That would make sense. It's did die from AIDS, I want to correct this. He played Mr. Noodle's brother, Mr. Noodle. Wait a minute. That would make sense. It's consistent. Yeah, they are the same. He was one of the monks in Sister Act.

He's going down. We died. We died young. Like the money pit. That is my answer to that question. Epilepsy. Okay, so I was wrong. My bad, Mr. Noodle.

I don't know why I thought that. Maybe he just wasn't out. Maybe you were intuitively correct about that. That's was in some great movie. I don't know why I thought that. Maybe he just wasn't out. Shit. Maybe you were intuitively correct about that. That's a hand up on me right there. I mourned for him, too, when I found that out like a year ago. Can I just say one thing? What?

From last night when Dave threw me under the bus and said I threw a helmet at somebody in anger because they called me a hick. That was crazy. I didn't remember. Because it didn't happen. Yeah, I knew you threw a helmet. I didn't know the circumstances. Wasn't there like a smile on your face when you did it? Yeah, I was joyful.

I was having fun. I was performative. You were taking joy and huffing. Yeah, he probably should have said that. The other point of you pushing Devlin, that was my point. And again, people are going to be like, dude, Rico's had many chances. I never for a second was like, Brandon's a bad guy. Like, I want him to fix it.

I also shook his hand five minutes later. We haven't had a problem. I know. I know. I just, yeah. I probably need to not trust anyone. I don't want to bring it back up. I'm just saying that Dave's point at me was crazy.

Let's talk about Mr. Noodle's AIDS. The worst part about it, I mean, not the worst part, but if Rico does get better, and I hope he does, and he becomes a new person in like a year, no one's going to be like, oh, yeah, that was smart that you were able to get him help and make him better. Oh, no, you won't get the credit. I don't want it, but I'm just saying it's a no-win.

And I do think he unblocked Nadeau. He's reaching out to Nadeau. He's going to maybe do content with him. He better. That's good. That's a good start. Baby steps. A lot of baby steps.

We got to do the wheel. Oh, wheel. For tacos? So there are enough for everybody. RG, eat tacos. So there are enough for everybody. Why don't you eat tacos? These are so good. God damn. Johnny.

I almost, by the way, ordered clam chowder for lunch, and then I stopped and I was like, we're drinking eggnog. Oh, God. Double up. Clam chowder of the land. Yeah. You guys are all aware we're vomiting today, right? Absolutely.

Look at you, Kyle, with your tacos. Oh, yeah. look at him. He's like a real foo. That's a lot of tacos, buddy. Hey, Kyle. I don't mind this one bit. It sure looks delicious. You really do have a totally new vibe.

Oh, pass them out? Yeah, yeah. Pass them down. What? You don't get all four of them. There's three. One per? I think we're going one per.

Take two, then. Well, here. Love crunchy tacos. Maybe he's up, so... Yeah. Give him one. Oh, thank you. I think you're good.

No, I don't want to take two. Hey, thanks, baby Joker. Thank you. Hell yeah. We needed you for the Oregon Trail for the Native American two. Hey, thanks, Baby Joker. Thank you. Hell yeah. We needed you for the Oregon Trail for the Native American. Oh, I know. Big miss. The Native American's name was Black Beaver.

Black Beaver. Wow. A proud name. Favorite movie of all time. Favorite movie of all time? I love the trilogy, the Fridays, all three of them. Oh, Baby Joker. That's next Friday.

Yeah, yeah, next Friday. I thought you meant Black Beaver. I thought Black Beaver was your favorite movie. Where are you going to get into this? You horny ass. I don't even know what the fuck you're talking about. We were talking about Black Beaver when you said that was my favorite movie. Nah, nah, I was responding to Baby Joker.

Baby Joker. Stick Warrior. Thanks. Oh, fuck. You've been great all week. Thank you Stick Warrior Thanks Oh fuck Honey you've been great all week Thank you very much Thanks These are the best so far Clap it up for Donnie

Thank you Donnie Donnie thank you That's my favorite movies too I fucking love those And especially Friday After Next Friday After Next Is a Christmas movie

Yeah That's a classic Santa all I want for Christmas Is two fat bitches A bag of weed and two packets of chips from fat bitches. See, it is his favorite, bro. I hope you don't get trapped in Zimbabwe's. I hope so. What's the status with that?

It's a matter of time. We've got, like, congressmen reaching out and all that. For real? Mr. Doolie's helped out, and I want to thank him. It's a matter of time. How long are you going to be back over there for? So I'm stuck there for a month because I couldn't get a, what's it called? Because it's Christmas period.

A visa, yeah. The visa closes down. Did someone help you out? Yeah, a lot of people helped me out. Did you see the suggestion that Mincy should marry you? Yep, I saw that. Is that on the table? I saw that video, too, after I saw that video yesterday. on the table? I saw that video too after I

saw that video yesterday. Oh yeah. You want to pull that up? I mean this actually, shout out Largest Wife St. Anne, she DM'd me this video and was like, is this Mincy? It's Mincy. It's Mincy. I didn't see it. You didn't see it? It's Mincy.

We've had a Tommy girl doppelganger and then we've had a Mincy, I guess this is cross-dressing? I don't know what it would be. Wait, did you hear what's going on with the Tommy girl? No. So many stoolies are subscribing to her OnlyFans that she now is aware of Barstool. Oh. And she's like, thank you, Tommy Smokes.

I have so many. And she's sending stoolies pictures of her. Oh, my God. Look at Mincy. That's Mincy, right? That is at this. That's Mincy, right? That is Mincy. Like, that's Mincy. How is that not Mincy?

That was crazy. Play it again. How is that not Mincy? He's standing upright. Maybe not when you zoom all the way in, but it is. Stop, fellas. Stop, fellas. Ho, ho, ho, fellas.

I could see his legs actually looking like that. Have you guys ever seen his whole legs? No. Oh. I could see him legs actually looking like that. Have you guys ever seen his whole leg? No. I could see him having beautiful legs. Pumps on the ground down in New Orleans. Oh, man. That's crazy, though, Kate, that she's rolling in the dough because of Tommy. Well, so then she's sending them pictures of her.

The stoolie's like, S and D. And then they're screenshotting, not that part, but. The stoolie's like, S&D? Suckin' dick? And then they're screenshotting, not that part, but sending to Tommy and being like, thanks, brother. You're great. Oh, my God. He's getting all this residual. I would hate that.

No, these guys are going to be jerking off to a Tommy surrogate. Enjoy this 13-minute video of me sucking cock and getting- Okay, that's weird for Tommy now. Yeah, it's weird. Yeah, I'd be uncomfortable. Mm-hmm. Good for her, though. She's a windfall because of Tommy.

Yeah, good for her. 13 minutes, Jesus Christ. I know. Just get it done. What did she tell him? She told him to enjoy what? A 13-minute video of her sucking dick. No, get fucked or nothing

Am I trying to watch Head for that long or at all? It's crazy long The same person For 13 minutes? Come on What do you think about for that long? While you're down there He's probably like has samurai focus

Did you go to Lakers games when you were out there? No. I flew in on Wednesday morning and then took the red eye back on Thursday night so just recorded three episodes.

Have you slept? For like three hours. Oh man. One of those but you know what? Fucking here yakking with the boys. Man.

That's why I get back and that's why Sass has no excuse. And where is he? Where is he? Where the fuck is he? Is he Buffalo? He's Buffalo. He's Buffaloney.

He's got to pay for his gift. How does that work? He's got to pay $500 for a gift, so he's got to do an extra show. He bought a gift, and it's here. Oh, awesome. We haven't still figured out the intricacies of how we're going to. We don't know how to Yankee swap. Yeah, that's the, we'll just do it.

It'll figure itself out. Yeah, it always does. We'll make the worst. We'll get the best gift, I'll get the worst, and then in the middle, we'll just figure it out. I think they're all good. And that was a foregone error, me getting the best thing. That was once, and now...

I'm a nostalgic guy, though. The tides have flipped, my good man, Brandon. Did everybody... Does everybody think they got a good gift? Did everybody give a gift to Spider? Yes. I didn't. I wrapped it myself. I didn't feel like I needed to have Spider do it.

The point of that was so you don't know which gift is yours. So now everybody will know which one is Brandon's. No, it's... No. You missed the point. It's the one that's in the different wrapping. No. The whole point was all the gifts.

I got the wrapping paper off Spider's desk. But your wrapping technique can't be the same as Spider's. I don't know. Whatever Katie's wrapping technique is my wrapping technique. Okay, got it. Yours would be worse than Spider's, but hers is better than Spider's. So whatever the best rapping technique is. It's going to be at least equal to and probably better.

Kyle, how's your head, man? How was the neurologist? It was worthless. What did they do? It was him. He was like my late 70s. He kept pausing to take a call from the the guy fixing his car he was he didn't care like he was googling my symptoms just saying hey maybe it's maybe it's this um maybe that was

all part of the test like so you're just tired maybe did you try adderall like that brother that's part of the problem um i think you have like the post-COVID He mentioned that On COVID? Like the concussion That just seems too pussy to be what I'm feeling Right, anytime I see someone talking about long COVID I'm like, you're a pussy Yeah

Suppress that Pretend that's not going on I don't need it So he didn't give you anything to fix your life? Thank you I have to get an MRI and see an epilepsy doctor But I don't think What if you had epilepsy? No, it's not

That's just like just in case If you had to wear a helmet all the time No thanks Because you might seize up Give me another one, Brandon Do you think he Like him calling his car Do you think that was part of like the neurologist test

Like can Like let's see this guy's patients It was It was like from a movie He was like I gotta get this I gotta text him And he was texting real slow And like narrating what he was saying

Dude old doctors are so funny Cause it's like when did you When did you go to school? Exactly. I had to go get a steroid shot for my back a couple years ago. And the dude was like, yeah, I'm retiring at the end of this year. He was like 85. He dropped the needle as he was about to go to bed.

This guy may have been in his 80s. Yeah. It's like you went to, there's no way that you're up to date on medicine. So what are you feeling again? Headache? And I was like, no, it's not a headache oh but you're tired yes do they have like i would assume they have continuing education courses right but those can't be that hard once you're a doctor you're just a doctor yeah you're in yeah no you're in forever it's like your license with their like civil war technology you probably try to like leech the fucking eat this right headache out of Yeah, no, you're in forever. It's like your license. With their, like, Civil War technology.

Probably try to, like, leech the fucking headache out of it. Take some opium. You'll be fine. Oh. Neurologist. Man. What a piece of shit. Nah. How did you get LinkedIn with him?

Maybe you just need a different neurologist. Maybe you need a young, spunky one. I would love a young man. Like a Grant Carver. What about a woman? 10X Health or something. Or a woman. Would you do 10X Health?

I prefer a woman. I get more comfortable around women. Hell yeah, you do. That's my boy. With a male doctor, you kind of feel like a pussy. Especially when you start saying what you're feeling. And you're like, oh shit, this is nothing. There's an element of any time you're with a male doctor where they give you a look and be like,

are you sure you want me to do these tests? Yeah. Fuck, you're right, dude. It's toxic masculinity and we're plagued with it. Yeah. That's why men die young. Yeah. They don't go to the doctor.

You guys get a physical from a woman doctor? Well, I got my physical when I went to the doctor last week. She didn't touch my anything. Yeah, I have a woman doctor. Didn't touch your balls? Is it just looking at you? It's just pretty much looking at you, and you have to just show that you can move your arms.

Did she see your balls? No. No, I was clothed. Last time I went to get a physical, the doctor was like, here, put on this robe, or change, and I'll come back. And I got fully nude, and he walked in, and he was like, what? And I was like, here, put on this robe, or like change, and I'll come back. And I got fully nude, and he walked in,

and he was like, what? And I was like, what? It was bad. I hadn't got a physical in a long time. I was like, I thought you, I thought I was supposed to take off my pants so you could look at my nuts. I don't think I've gotten a physical since high school.

Should we get physicals? I can't do male gynecologists. I'm always, a little part of me is always like, why did you pick that route? I thought you were talking about gynecologists for males. Easiest job in the world. Hey, should we all get physicals and post it?

No. Mm-mm. Why not? Oh, man, that would be fun. A game. I'd hate it. Yeah, why wouldn't you want to know what's wrong? Yeah.

I used to, every time. I avoided physicals for a long time. Long time. When Rite Aid had the blood pressure things, I would play with that while my parents were shopping. Have you had to hand up your butt? Once, but I was like 20. I don't know why it happened. Are you supposed to do it when you're 40?

I haven't had the adult version. One tee? You've got to do it. Yeah. I don't remember why. I think I was going through some things. Don't they have a... Was this an experiment? It was a doctor.

It was a doctor. Okay. Don't they have it now that they don't have to put the hand up your butt? They don't. Isn't there a machine? Really? I don't know. They can just look? I'm hoping that... I've basically been, for the last five years, been terrified of

getting 40 for that reason, hoping technology will get to a point where they can like point like a laser pointer and be like you're good all right i get the old prostate checked yeah what do you have to do like a pill with a little camera on the front oh you know what i mean yeah just goes like the magic school bus all the way through yeah tells you what's going on what if it's awesome what if it feels great? Yeah. Like, damn, I've been putting this off. You're all missing out. I'm telling you. Fuck. It's a hoot up there.

Shit. From what I've heard. Yeah, all right. So we got to get physicals. Steven, do you get a physical every year? Oh, yes. Yeah. Oh, man.

They're free. You're supposed to. You love it. It's like. They're free. You're supposed to. You love it. It's like... I don't get fingers on my butt. Not yet. Yeah, you should. No, not yet.

Why not? Why not get ahead of it? I'm not that age. So what do you do when... Like, what do they do in the physical? Do the stethoscope, cough, ask your height and weight, ask you... Or they take your height and weight, they ask you any changes. Been drinking, smoking, whatever. Pretty much it.

Check out your nuts for a second. So they do check out your nuts. Yeah. Mine hasn't. Not your butt. Wait, you don't get your nuts checked out? Not in my physicals. I have a woman doctor.

That'd be assault. I've gotten that from a woman doctor. You get hard? No. Not even a little? Liar. Too much self-control. Is it ever a coincidental boner?

I don't get those anymore. That's sad. Oh, dude, you might want to get that checked out. Yeah, you should. You don't get one just randomly every now and then? Coincidental boner? Or just accidental? An RB?

No reason boner? Yeah. 37. You might want to get that checked out. Your libido's probably trash. Sounds like you have a low libido. I have a boner right now? No, dude.

It doesn't happen often. Testosterone is not peak, but like... It's elite. How do you know that? You have elite testosterone. Yeah, I do. How do you know? Yo, how do you know?

Elite's a little bit stronger. Oh, no. This is where we always get these lines of questioning. Steven's right about to tell us how much sex he has. But he doesn't have that a crazy amount. It's when you do have sex,

you're crazy. He's a fucking monster. I prefer not to go any further with this stuff. Okay, that's fair. I also would prefer not to go any further with this. The man just bragged about

elite testosterone. Yeah, you have to figure out. Come on now. Dig at this. Elite? prefer not to go the man just bragged about bragged about elite testosterone yeah you got we have to figure out come on now dig at this elite what makes it elite you got pro bowl

testosterone do you test it are your levels high how do you know I feel like I have a pretty good idea I guess you're right I don't have a

so you don't know yeah you have no idea but if I have low T then I don't want to see what high T is. Oh, the world cannot handle a high T, Stephen Shea. Are you saying that your lows are like just that big? No.

Are they enormous? No comment. You said elite. Elite testosterone. You have to back it up somehow. Is this based on sexual things or like athletic or physical? How you feel? Sexual. I don't want to go any further. Sexual. So then it's sexual. or like athletic or physical? How you feel? Sexual.

I don't want to go any further. Sexual. So then it's sexual. Of course. Which means that he's coming a lake. I think he's bluffing. Okay. You're entitled to believe.

Come against him. Oh! Come off? Let's come. Come against him. Come at him. Come at me, bro. Can they do that on Jackass?

You're a fucking tummy nutter, so we didn't go that far. Oh, yeah, didn't they test their sperm counts? Yeah, that's right. Clem got into it with a guy that did jerk-off battles on Twitter. Wank battles. Wank battles, yeah. It was a woman lover 007. Would you rather have a small amount of jizz?

Nut, thank you. With a small amount of Nut Thank you With a ton of sperms in it Or like a huge amount of nut With just a couple sperms in it What's the difference What would you rather know Like what would make you feel more like alright Like yeah it's not a lot but there's a ton of sperms in there

I don't know I don't have a preference really I guess I don't know Dense Quality over quantity Yeah well what's the quantity here Sperms I don't have a preference, really. I guess... I don't know. Dense? Quality over quantity? Yeah.

Well, what's the quantity here? Sperms. But isn't jizz just, like, a lot of, like... Water? Water with... I don't know. Salt? Yeah, I don't know. You gotta ask your neurologist.

Yeah. That, too. Google it for you. Yeah. What is in sperm? I don't really know. These yak hats are sick. Yeah it for you. Yeah. What is in sperm? I don't really know. These yak hats are sick. Yeah, they are.

Would wet ruin the Christmas? Oh, my God. This is all I have. Yes. This is the only clothes I have. I didn't even think about that. Yeah. Did I probably bring a second outfit?

Oh, yeah. Well, yes. I don't have dress. I brought a full suit. No, this is my fit. Really? This is my Christmas fit, yeah. I brought a sweater outfit? Oh, yeah. Well, yes. I don't have a dress. I brought a full suit. No, this is my fit. Really? This is my Christmas fit, yeah. I brought a sweater.

I brought really dumb. I don't have a chute. I have some festive stuff for everybody. Cool. That's really what you brought? Yeah. Where would this be Christmas? I don't want to be the disappointed mom in the group, but like...

We said dress up for Christmas, not Dia de las Muertes. Come on, I got jeans on. That is unlike. You're dressed unlike you. That's true. If we're doing like levels of what you usually dress as, you are dressed up. Yeah. Those are sick jeans, too.

With a big-ass pocket. Yeah, look at this. That's a huge pocket. Are those cargo pockets or no? You want to spin our wheel? Yeah, let's see what the fuck our wheel says. I'm excited to see Tyler O'Day. So excited. We have to make sure he doesn't post the list until the episode comes out.

Yeah, no, I told him it was taped. It's going to air next Friday. So he's aware alright okay we got something okay alright it's gonna be TJ

and it's gonna be wet yeah alright or I think it's gonna be Yak just ends forever yeah All right. Or yak just ends forever. Yeah, there's always that possibility when you get to the name wheel. Is there a doomsday device somewhere? Yeah.

My wheel has a 1% yak ends forever. It's good to have. It's healthy to have. It's nice to have that hanging over you. Yeah, right. Live like we're dying. Is that Tim McGraw? It is. What's skydiving? Who knows what's going to have. It's nice to have that hanging over you. Yeah, right. Live like we're dying. Is that Tim McGraw? It is.

What's skydiving? Who knows what's going to happen. Rocky Mountain climbing. Manchu. Always TJ. Jesus Christ, TJ. Something's amiss. You've gotten this every time. It's wet on TJs? Yes, classic wet.

Oh, no. Yeah, this could be a catastrophe. But we did it, so it's off. Oh, yeah, yeah, okay. Let's hope for hibachi. There's a milk. I think we've got to reconfigure that other wheel. The fact it keeps on landing on TJ, that shit is improbable. Oh, hibachi would be so awesome.

What, is hibachi just going or having someone come? We'd like to have the chef come in. We should have the chef come in, yeah. Just cook it right there. You're going to hire hibachi just going or having someone come? We'd like to have the chef come in. We should have the chef come in. Yeah. Just cook it right there. You're going to hire hibachi guys now. I like when you have to catch stuff in your mouth. Yeah. Never have done it.

Never caught it? Never caught. Damn. I don't know how you do it. Have you been called upon to catch? Oft. Really? Yeah.

I'm a prime target there. I'm a lead at catching things in my mouth. I don't know how to do it. You are good. I've seen you do it. I'm very good at it. I'm good at it, too. You made me throw something at you across the room.

Maybe we have a contest during the Christmas special where you go get some goldfish and see who's better. Wait, I've done that with you, too, haven't I? I'm good at it. Yeah, you are good. Yep. All right, we'll have a contest. Who's better?

Yeah. Out of 10, maybe? Yeah. That's out of 10. The objects get larger. Okay, spin it. No milk, no milk, no milk. What flag does that look like, Kyle?

Cuba. Puerto Rico, Chile. Oh, no. What does this mean? Someone's going to have to... Have to be a mediocre football team. They have to wear all wear TJ's Rutgers gear for an entire day. Do they have to go to a game? Yeah, we should go to a game together.

We have to go to a game together. You have to. An event at Rutgers of your choice. Kyle, would you go to a wrestling meet if you wanted to? Wearing all Rutgers gear. The day that you have to go basketball, wrestling, whatever it may be, you gotta come in that day wearing all Rutgers gear and then you and TJ go on a Rutgers

date. Jewel concert? That's nice. That'd be nice. A Jewel concert? She from Rutgers? Yeah. Charity concert at Rutgers. How do you know this stuff?

Remember when Jewel just put on a fake nose and just sang as Jewel? I love that video. It was a big one. Yeah, she's a really good singer. No, it was like, how does this mildly attractive woman, how is she doing that? It's like whenever the third wide receiver, like, a special teams player does, like, the... I worked at Dick's Sporting Goods for a day. No one recognized me. I know.

It's like, yeah, dude. Or the opposite, when, like, Shaq is the mystery Uber driver. Yeah. Like, takes off his glasses. Like, I'm Shaq. Remember when Macklemore dressed up in, like, a disguise, but it was just, like just the most anti-Semitic Jew costume of all time? He did a concert with it. Yeah.

Yes. And he tried to be like, I just got a random costume. I grabbed a beard and a witch's nose and a wig. And a prayer shawl. It was just so... It was very... Yeah. Yeah.

He's probably... There it was, yeah. Oh my God. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Was that after Lil Dicky came out? Or probably before. Probably a little bit before.

Oh, we're spinning to see who's going with TJ. It's going to be Brandon. It's going to be me. It's going to be me. Oh. Roan. Rutgers Day. Returns to campus. I love Rutgers.

Yeah, let's go to a basketball game. Penn State? Oh, that would hurt. Yeah. Penn State basketball. Or I would love to even go to like a – who's the best game on their schedule? I'm looking right now. You could go to...

Oh, we could cheat it. Michigan State plays at MSG. Rutgers-Michigan State. Oh, wow. Perfect. I might go too. I want to go to that. I love going to basketball games.

We might all just do Rutgers Day. No, no, no. It's my thing. We can't wear Rutgers gear. Yeah, we can't wear Rutgers gear. We play Maryland. I would love to. The Spartans.

Good logo. I noticed. Top logo? Look at the UAB logo. You ever seen that one? Oh, it's awesome. The Dragons? Yeah, the UAB logo is incredible.

Wait, who is the top logo you said? Michigan State's is good. Yeah, you know. I don't know. Look at that logo. I don't think that's good. That looks like a. It's a great logo. I don't think. That looks like clip art. Yeah, you know. I don't know. What does that logo look like? I don't think that's good. It looks like a... It's a great logo.

That looks like clip art. Yeah, clip art. Yeah, that's clip arty. ECU's having a moment. Oh, I like it in that though. I like that. ECU's having a big moment with the Horned Frogs. Oh, yeah.

What's going on with them? Because they're in the college football playoff. Oh, yeah. Doing like the hypnotodes. Yeah. That's a cool logo. Yeah, it's good black and purple is cool who's got the coolest college logo uh wow it's a tough question i liked uh the uh oregon donald duck yeah lsu used to have when it was the tiger caricature but now

it's just the letters and it's not as good. I feel like UCLA, that Bruin is pretty cool, I want to say. I don't think of them as that as their logo, though. Yeah, that's true. Oh, the Sun Devils. Oh, here we go. This helps a lot. This helps a lot.

Oh, Miami one was sweet. I actually do love Colorado. That's not pandering to Coach Prime. I love the Buffalo. I think the Buffalo is cool as fuck. Whatever that little beaver is. I think Auburn has a beaver. Oregon State?

Is that? I don't know. Mississippi State worse. Sorry, Brandon. That's bad. It is bad. It's not great. Oh, that's the Chanticleers.

The Razorback and the Gator are pretty cool. The Razorback is very cool. I feel like a Bulldog is always cool. The one with muscles like in Mountain West. I'm tired of people thinking Washington State's is good just because it's a bad WS&C. Why is that? NC State has a great one. Kentucky's is great.

NC State's is great. Why is this anti-Texas? It's big game boomer post. Texas is upside down. Yeah. What in the hell? I like NC State's. I also like ECU and Tulane.

The AAC has some good ones. Yeah. ECU, the Pirate. I mean, Miami's a classic. I love Miami. I don't care for NIU's. They also suck. It's just a fucking hurricane warning flag.

The Big Ten is pretty much bad. Yeah, not great. I would say the Hawkeye, maybe. Northwestern's is the worst. That's a bad N. It's too many block letters. That's a bad N. Yeah, it is too many block letters.

You're right. United States is cool. Got to fix that. I like just letters. I like Virginia Tech's a lot. You like letters, huh? Not their colors, though. I think Texas Tech is the worst.

A lot. It's busy. Raging Cajuns are missing a chance for good imagery. Yeah. It should be a drunk, really sunburnt guy. Piece of straw coming out of his mouth. The old Hofstra logo before it got changed, the Flying Dutchman was a very good logo.

Can I see it? Why did they change it? Don't tell me it was offensive. It went woke? It was offensive? Flying Dutch? Like when I was in 2003 or 2004. Is it because of the Dutch upset?

Yeah, do they not fly? What's the... It's kind of like dehumanizing them, making them out to be creatures who could... Rare born. Are people upset with the fighting Irish as well? Yeah, there's been... I don't think like a lot,

but I feel like there have been. That's also like a very funny thing whenever like Irish people, and I am part Irish, so I can say this, like Irish people are like, we actually are the most persecuted people. Oh, yeah. You should say no blacks, no Irish. Yeah.

What? Shut up. It used to be we could only work as cops. We could only be bankers. We could only be the rich elite. Wasn't right. Irish and Italian, whenever they're like, we're actually persecuted, it's like, okay. That's what the Romanis or the gypsies are.

They're trying to claim persecution, trying to cancel Tom Segura. Saw that. Really? For what? Making a gypsy joke. Did you see Tom Segura? Maybe the funniest thing ever. Tom and Burt get each other more expensive gifts for their birthday every single year. Can you find this clip?

Oh, my God. So Tom, I won't give it away. TJ, can you find the clip of him giving Bert his birthday present this year? I want you guys to watch it because it is one of the funniest things ever. So every year they have to get more expensive gifts. So, like, Bert got Tom a race car. Tom got Bert, like, 100 miles on a private jet like they just keep one upping each other so that like their birthdays are a big deal and they both have been

like I don't know how we're gonna like keep one upping each other um I can try to find it it's so good it's so funny I've heard about it but I haven't watched it. You would love it, Brandon. I think I've seen like House Walkenfeld on the Obersthalzburg teacup set was at the House Walkenfeld on the Obersthalzburg. And in 1936, Gertie Troost, whose

husband was Hitler's architect, she was his interior designer. She had that teacup set at her apartment in Bad Reichenhall, and a man named Isaac Hahn was gifted it. He sold it to an unknown collector, who later sold it to a man named Richard Michael Colliker, who sold it once more to the unnamed party,

and we acquired it. And there is basically a 99 probability that you're holding something that the fuhrer drank from hitler's mug coffee mug hitler's cup that's his gift oh my, my God. All time. Put it to your lips. I'd be pumped to get that. It was so expensive, I'm sure.

Oh, my God. What a psycho. Oh. What a fucking nut. Oh, man.. What a psycho. Oh. What a fucking nut. Oh, man. Those guys are funny. So they're trying to cancel Tom? No, it was one guy. They better try and cancel Fleetwood Mac, dude.

If anybody talks about gypsies, they're still singing about gypsies. They're big on my TikTok algorithm. And my God. I mean, I'm not making fun of him I guess gypsy I don't want to say the wrong thing can you say it? I don't know I don't think I don't know but holy shitballs that's a

I have a feeling too that that Tom won't really care yeah I'm sending you another one TJ I won an 18 year old kid now he won't yeah I'm sending you one other clip that. It's like one 18-year-old kid. No, he won't. Yeah. Yeah, I'm sending you one other clip that he had that made me laugh so hard that I, like, the energy, like, more people should have this energy that he has where he's just like, fuck everyone.

That's the best part about the comedians now is, like, they all have, like, their own podcast and Patreon so they can literally just say fuck you to everyone. Yeah. It's a good level which like is like the reverse when people like comedy's dying it's actually like probably never been more alive because people are insulated to a point where they can take any risks they want to take and you can buy the comedy you want to see yeah you could opt in yeah but yeah but it's just the fans consuming it so you're not gonna the people who don't like them aren't even gonna see it right it is happening it fans consuming it. So the people who don't like him aren't even going to see it. Right. It is happening.

It is disingenuous when the people who don't like him try to cancel these guys because it's like you didn't opt in. You're just flying by and being like, he shouldn't say this. As opposed to the only comedy you saw was on Johnny Carson or something like that. Yeah, right. They can regulate that if everybody has to have their say in that because it's publicly consumed. If it's privately consumed. What are you seeing, Brandon?

Ohio. Do you have a bet? Yeah, it's the overstead. Just checking in on the Bahamas Bowl. This is... Or a car. I'll get a bunch of messages from losers that try to tell me that i'm i'm making them feel bad about their situation you're in control of your own situation and your own

feelings so don't put it on me that you feel bad that i have something that, oh, but I'm struggling with rent this month. Figure it the fuck out. Okay. Like don't make my life be a problem for your life. If you don't like it, guess what? You're not going to be able to control what people talk about. People are going to talk about things that you don't have for the rest of your fucking life. Here's the thing. If you're, if you're still mad about this, just know that it's your mindset. And you're thinking like a fucking loser. But you don't have to. You don't.

You can change the way you think. But you have to accept the way you're thinking right now is not going to get you anywhere. You're being bitter. You're being petty. You're insecure. You're not confident. If you just sit around and you, you know what? You only have what you have because of fans. So don't talk about us like that. Yeah, but you're still a loser if you're sit around and you you know what you only have what you have because of fans so don't talk about us like that yeah but you're still a loser if you're thinking like that you

may be uh i'm lucky to have you as a loser fan but you don't have to be that way you could be a winner every time we talk about like that's like bert's listening face yeah got a good bert's a cheat code for podcasts you can literally just sit him down and he just talks you don't have to ask him a question great storyteller shit is sweet what an absolute gem what a fucking stud ron you've been too busy man you. You look good, too, right now. We should all wear suits. I'm telling you guys. Let's all get custom suits.

Yeah. You look like a hot professor. Yeah. Yeah, what do you think I'm teaching? I don't know, but you're fucking a lot of your students. Teaching fuck classes. Yeah, you are fucking all your students. Office hours are always open.

I guess that's how it's got to be. Women's studies? Yeah, philosophy or something. You think they wear suits for philosophy? Oh, yeah. I think they're haggard looking for philosophy. Yeah, I think suits are a little try-hard for philosophy. It's too bound to the earthly vessel.

They're not wearing brand names. Philosophy might be just like one old suit coat. Like maybe... Corduroy. With the patches on the elbow. Yeah. And it's just stained and it's just old. You smell like older coffee a little bit.

Yeah. That smell. Do you guys remember any of your college teachers' names or anything? Oh. Yeah. No. I remember one teacher's name. Nate, that's insane that I don't.

Or maybe two teachers' names. Fuck, I don't think I remember one teacher's name. Nate, that's insane that I don't. Or maybe two teachers' names. Fuck, I don't think I remember like one. Not a single name. Damn, that's crazy. They're so forgettable. I had a teacher that taught comedy writing named John Hruska. Whoa. He was pretty good, and every day you had to come into his class,

and you had to have a joke prepared, and he'd call out five people to tell a joke. It was kind of sweet. Wow. Comedy writing? The joke's good? Yeah, were they usually good? to his class and you had to have a joke prepared and he'd call out five people to tell a joke. It was kind of sweet. Wow. Comedy writing? The joke's good. You could find a joke. You just had to practice telling it and standing up in front of people. Was it a useful class?

I remembered his name. I think that the textbook was just famous comedy writing through time which was pretty useful. I had a professor. I did honors history, and he was like 90 years old. I don't think he read anything.

He just gave me an A for everything. Just remembered his life. It was so easy. It was like he just wouldn't have class because he'd just be napping. It was just great. That is sweet. Never had to do anything.

History classes, you should just be able to watch movies of what happened. Yeah, documentaries. Watch documentaries and, like, Troy. It should actually be, like, the way they should do it is they should just do a history class. It's documentaries, but you're just not allowed to have your phone with you. Yeah. Because you'd actually learn. Definitely.

That's the fastest way to download some information. Right. Because every time I watch a documentary, I'm just scrolling my phone. What were the ancient Greek soldiers that were all gay together? Spartans. Yeah. There was the Spartans, but then there was a gayer. They were gay?

Oh, they were the gayest, Kyle. Oh, dude, the Romans? Big time. They would literally just eat grapes and get their dick sucked by little boys. I thought that was just like a war tactic. Oh, no. But there was a whole other sect of, it was like, more, like, gayer than the Spartans,

and they would, like, pair up, and they would be fucking each other, and they would just all fight to the death. Like, they just were the most badass metal warriors. I'm trying to think what. Sacred Band? Yeah. An elite military unit of thieves comprising 150 gay couples.

Yeah, it was thieves. Wow. It was 150 gay couples from thieves and they were all just fucking murdering and sucking. Yeah. Must have been awesome. What a life.

Sucking and murdering. They would eat until they puked and then they would get their dick sucked Really? Yeah The Romans? The vomitorium The Romans would?

They were so gluttonous They would just be like Yeah They were the only people who had all the food And they would eat until they just had to puke And then just get sucked? And then get sucked off That's how the lower classes would get their nutrients?

It's like the Jimmy V It's like the Jimmy V speech Like's like the Jimmy V. speech. Like, a full day is like, you gotta laugh, you gotta cry, you gotta feel, you gotta puke, you gotta get sucked by a boy. Yeah.

Go to war. Wake up, drink, war, gay sex. Watch some dude get his head ripped off by a lion. Yeah. And that's a fulfilling day. Go to bed with a smile. That's when you know you've had yourself a day. Ron, you're grumpy.

Did you not have gay sex today? You're not puked yet? And there's definitely like, since it was like so popular for them to be gay, there's definitely straight guys who are like, like eating their vegetables.

Getting sucked off with a icky face. I don't like it. It was just popular. It was just the way of the world. It was. It was just what was in.

Yeah. I watched The Last Samurai for the first time on this red-eye flight. Have you guys ever seen that? I remember my first Last Samurai. It was awesome. Yeah. It was fucking really good.? I remember my first last samurai. It was awesome.

Yeah. It was fucking really good. Tom Cruise. Yeah. Tom Cruise. He learns quick. Yeah. He really picked up samurai pretty quick.

Makes it seem like not that hard. Tom Cruise is a really good actor, huh? Yeah. He's the last movie star. Is he? People say that, but he's not,

is he? He's the only one that his name's still bigger than the title. Yeah. You might be right. Would Leo? Maybe. Last movie star. Last action star.

Yeah, like. I feel like Chris Pratt's moved into an action star. No, that's not. No, no, no. When Tom Cruise is in a movie, it's talked about. He's not as big a star, but he's an action star. It's a Tom Cruise movie. Right. Okay, but he's an action star. It's a Tom Cruise movie. Right.

Okay, but he's an action star. He's not as big a movie star as Tom Cruise, but Guardians of the Galaxy, Jurassic World, he's been in a lot of action movies. Like Tom Cruise in person, I don't want to like him. Everything he does, I'm like, ugh, Tom Cruise. But then I see a movie that he's in, and I'm like, he's fucking great.

That was great. Separate the art from the artist. Yeah. Top Gun 2 was great. He was great. Separate the art from the artist. Yeah. Top Gun 2 was great. He was great. Tom Cruise would have been a great gay Thebian soldier. Oh, my God. Oh, boy.

Not because he's short. What's the... Super short. What's a football movie? All the Right Moves? Yeah. Great one, too. Can't Get Pussy?

So short. He's 5'7". Is that what you're saying? He's intense. I was just saying he's intense. By the way, Roback. Roback.com. Use code YAK for 20% off your first purchase.

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Their golf shirts are comfortable. Their joggers. Their polos. Which is golf shirts. Their Q-zips. Long sleeve shirts that they have. They sponsored the college football show. Brandon and I were just swimming in Roback. I said, the vest's on.

Oh, the vest. Yeah, Brandon started wearing a vest after I did. They gave me the vest to wear. I wore it first. You got it at the same time, though. Right. But who put it on first? You did, I guess, technically.

I rest my case. Roback's so good, Brandon will copy me for it. That's a great advertisement, actually. Yeah. Brandon sees that. He says, I want that. Online. Want that. Roback.com for 20% off your first purchase.

Use code YAK. Highly, highly, highly recommended. Roback is the most comfortable clothes out there. Promo code YAK. So we need to make the transition to Christmas soon? Yeah. We're going to have to do a whole change of the room, too. Yeah.

Are we? Yeah, there's a Christmas tree, there's decorations. Some snow. It's going to be awesome. I tried to find horchata and all that stuff at the liquor store. The little one? Yeah, and I couldn't, so I have to make... I don't know, because are we just doing eggnog?

Yeah, Stephen went out and got 15 bottles of eggnog for us. Can we just drink eggnog? I don't want these and got 15 bottles of eggnog for us. Can we just drink eggnog? I don't want these crazy concoctions. What are you doing? Horchata. Thinking about eggnog. You okay? Jeff DeLosa, this is the best eggnog you can get.

Do you like some clam chowder? Is it the Whole Foods eggnog? She's also just coming off being violently ill. Same. I need a Pepto Bismol before this. Dude, you have the same thing as me then yes oh my god i mean i think i had it last week even in target last night i'm sorry but good god because i hadn't eaten since lunch here but i have like little nibbles and i needed

something and so my go-to when i feel sick is milkshakes because i tell myself your stomach is oh that's bad oh but hear me out my stomach when your stomach is... Oh, that's bad. No, but hear me out. My stomach... Okay, you're not supposed to... When your stomach is empty because there's like nothing in my system, it's all acid. So how do you counteract an acid with a base? What's a base? Milk. What's in a milkshake?

Milk. So I always tell myself when I'm sick, I have a milkshake. Milkshake? And it goes. Oh, that's got to be... But dairy is going to... It's got to be the worst thing you could have. I don't think of it as dairy.

I think of it as a base. Oh, you don't think of it as a base? What are you talking about? I do. How you think of it doesn't play into how your body acts. I mean, if it doesn't make you feel bad. She said it does make her feel bad. Oh, yeah, of course.

Well, it did last night. It did last night. I stopped at Burger King and got a milkshake thinking that'll create a solid base around my stomach lining. It didn't. It's an acid-forming food. Uh-oh. It's not a base. Uh-oh.

Wait, what? Mom, I've been Lactic acid I've been that for about 20 years now Whoopsies KB, what are you gonna do? You've been sober I'm gonna stay sober

I want you guys to drink Thank you When I'm sober, I love when people get fucked up around me Yeah, I bet I feel better about myself Yeah Are you just gonna have the non-alcoholic eggnog? Yeah, you can just have the eggnog

Yeah Just have the milk That might be worse Yeah, honestly It Yeah, you can just have the eggnog. Yeah. Just have the milk. That might be worse. Yeah, honestly. It'll make you want to drink. At least I'll be drunk and sick. I definitely have the same thing, Kate. I had some bad scallops the other day,

and I woke up like the fucking Undertaker and had to poop sand for about a half hour. It was nice. Right by the beach. Bad. Right by the beach. Bad. Right by the beach, boy. I feel bad for Pat because every time, like, I had to, like, report each time,

like, this is what it was like this time. This is what it was like this time. You were logging your logs. Yeah, like, never. Yeah. I could see you having a house with, like, a... The milkshake move is just so crazy. I've always done that.

Always. So crazy. Are you going to stop now with your new finding? I wish I... Ignorance is bliss and I wish I didn't know that. It is funny the things that you like, the medicine you trick yourself into thinking. I tell myself too, your stomach's like hot and acid so get something cold. Yeah, no.

Like a base. And that's what I've always done. It's like when I got my... I had a kidney stone because I just was, I thought I was going to get COVID and I just started inhaling vitamin C to the point it built up.

That was stupid. There's nothing they tried. I was like, I could beat this. They were trying to do something. Just give me all the vitamin C. Did they give you the option of like, we'll remove it or you have to pee it out? I peed it out.

It hurt a lot. That sounds terrible. That's a lot. Ugh, that sounds terrible. That's a nightmare. Yeah, that sounds terrible. Have any of you had them? But I'm lucky that I was able to, like, when people have it and they have to get, like, lasers. Like a hook. Yeah.

Oh, my God. How long does it hurt for from the time the pain starts to, like? I think I was lucky because it was, like, not a kidney stone that's, like, you know, like your lifetime buildup. Like, I think Large's had that. Mine was, like, strictlyet like your lifetime buildup like i think larges had that mine was like strictly because i just overdosed on vitamin c so it was about a day where i like my dick hurt and then it was like oh i like peed out a rock i was like that's probably yeah you've seen them under a microscope yeah they're crazy it's like razor it's like yeah sharp little, yeah. Good times. How do you prevent that? Hydration, maybe?

I don't know. Don't take vitamin C to the point where you overdose on it. That's what it is? Is it salt? No. Vitamin deposit? I think there's other,

like the long-term kidney stones like Large had, and I think PFT had them. Those are different than what I... I just literally took so much vitamin C that it just built up a rock in my dick. That's hilarious that that's where it built up.

Yeah. Do you ever see... Ansel stones? Have you seen that? Oh, they're disgusting. I accidentally... I was scrolling and saw a video of it. Have you heard of this? Ansel stones? I get them. When I was a kid, I used to tell my mom, I just got this rock in my mouth, and she'd be like, whatever.

And I just saw this video, and I was like, oh my god, I think that's what that was. They smell so bad. Yes, dude, they stink. I saw this video where a doctor pushed on the tonsils, and like 15 stones came out of this guy's tonsils. I didn't know that was a thing. Yeah. I had no know that was a thing. Yeah.

I had no idea until like yesterday. They say like bacteria, like you know how like a clam makes a pearl? It's like a little piece of bacteria or something gets stuck in like the crevices of your tonsils. Imagine some like civilization like 20,000 years from now

like mining our bodies for like tonsil stones that they wear as jewelry. I always think about what happens in 3,000 years from now when they dig up archaeology. They just find someone's braces. Yeah. Someone's retainer. Yeah, like what's this? Yeah.

Some guy on TikTok. They have metal teeth? Did we look at that on this show? The guy that, like, what's this? Yeah. Some guy on TikTok. They have metal teeth? Did we look at that on this show? The guy that buried the, like, Flaming Hot Cheetos? Yeah. Made of sarcophagus? He made a sarcophagus

for future civilizations, and it's, like, it's earthquake-proof, and, like, it's, like, completely protected, so 10,000 years from now, they'll find Flaming Hot Cheetos? Yeah, just once it's been in Yeah just once That's a solid bro move

It was just one guy who did it for fun right? Yeah Solid bro move He's like a genius engineer Yeah Very solid Alright so

let's end the show now We're gonna costume change reminder Christmas special will be out next Friday Who's in next week? I'm here all week

I'm here all week Oh I leave Or I might not be here Monday I'm gonna be in Chicago Friday?? I'm here all week. I'm here all week. Oh, I leave or I might not be here Monday. I'm going to be in Chicago Friday. So I'm here until Thursday.

Yeah, I'm here all week. Awesome. Brandon, you're out. I'm going to Wyoming because Roan declined and said make Brandon go

to that cold ass state. I didn't know they picked you. You're back up. Oh, that's not true. You're the one who got got the run run off.

All right. Well, yeah. See everyone Monday and be ready for the Christmas special next Friday. Have a good weekend, everybody.