The Yak - KB & Steven Cheah Get Into Some WACKY Insect Shit At The Barstool Wedding || The Yak 7-12-21

Episode Date: July 13, 2021

From the beetle incidents, the KB and Glenny Balls beef, and Zah's dinner order, its safe to say this was the wedding of the century.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Oh, we are live. Yak season four starts now. He's getting coffee. Already off to a terrible start. Yeah. Why?

Because Stephen and KB have little nicknames for each other from the wedding last night. Shut up. Nick, did you get invited to the wedding? Nick and I felt like we were in an awkward exchange in a living room when the couple comes out of the bedroom and they're like,

alright, see you later. Steven goes, what's up, Beetlejuice? And then they tap up. And then they just laugh. Oh no. I really don't want to go down this road

with you guys. But wait, let's guess, what could Beetlejuice, what could that mean? How do you earn the nickname Beetlejuice in one night? Was it the drink that you were having? Were you wearing a pinstripe suit?

Did he say your name three times in the mirror and you appeared? No, it's not a flattering reason to have that nickname. How do you get Beetlejuice for a flattering name? Sup, Beetlejuice? Oh, wait, is the Beetlejuice like the Howard Stern Beetlejuice? Yeah, I dressed like him. What was Beetlejuice?

Was there like, is it like mythical or some shit like that? Who's Beetlejuice? Beelzebub? That's what I'm thinking of. We've said it a lot now. We've spawned multiple. KB, I have a theory that you went to the wedding last night because it was probably the one and only time that you'll get invited to a wedding that Nick's not

invited to. That's not true. That's several, dozens probably. No way. You're used to... You put an ampersand. You think your name's and Kyle after having that word. Do you have a plus or minus? No. People lead off more with Kyle.

Do they? They used to before Nick worked here. To be fully honest, I say KB and Nick. Do they? They used to before Nick worked here. To be fully honest, I say KB and Nick. You do? Goofy style? I know you say Nick and KB. I say Nick and KB. Subconscious favoritism?

But I do have Nick saved in my phone as KB's Nick. For me and Big Cat, people are more like Sass and Big Cat. I remember it was my first week. I didn't have a nickname. You're like, don't worry, you'll get one. And then you saved me in your phone as Pedo Nick. Yeah, Pedo Nick. I didn't like that.

No, but that was good, though. That was fucking hilarious. I can't remember why you're a pedo. Because he has sex with children. Oh, that's why. That's awesome. That's usually the reason. Forgetting why somebody's a pedophile.

It's tough to do. Why was he a pedophile? Why was he a pedophile? It was the look. What the fuck did he do? Beetlejuice is the tenth biggest the tenth brightest star

in our sky. Oh yeah. That's Beelzebub. They're just naming stars after whatever huh? Fuck. Fucking Rigel. Hey good to see you.

Beetlejuice is gonna explode soon right? Yes. Like soon soon. Soon like in the next billion years. Yeah. It's like yes.

It's impending. We'll have ancestors that get smoked by Beetlejuice exploding. Not me. I'm the end of the line. You're the last one? Yeah. You're the last Terranie? Nick, do you have siblings? I just have a sister. You've agreed to

never spawn? I don't have any. I'm the last Terranie. And so my mom, I remember she had a parent-teacher meeting because all these kids were hitting me in the nuts in seventh grade. That was a trend, though. like hitting me in the nuts in like seventh grade That was a trend though. Yeah hitting me in the nuts Specifically specifically me we did hornets and hitting you and the only reason stop offering it so I don't want that coffee Just have to have to don't put on the floor fucking. Oh and just bought them You don't you want to go large every time we can get minis give me a fucking too much.... Thank you, Owen. Owen, do you got a new haircut?

No, I just haven't gotten a haircut. I think I usually get them more often. Nice. So, Stephen Che and KB are fucking. Oh, nice. These guys got late-onset FOMO, huh? I hit it off with Mrs. Che, too. It looked great. The wedding looked incredible.

His mom? You hit it off with his. Che, too. It looked great. The wedding looked incredible. His mom? You hit it off with his mom? With Stephen's wife. Stephen also is not hungover, even though I caught him in the hallway with a huge Revitalite and an egg and cheese bagel. It was what was available. It's literally what is available in our office. You were pounding bay breezes. You're so hungy.

Bay breezes? He was pounding, yeah. Gin and tonics. A couple gin and tonics. What are you, 70? Is your mouth... I like those. You like to chew on pine cones?

That's my go-to going out drink. Who's the new guy? Yeah, we got to like... You thought you were going to slip the new guy in there? We got five men. We got a school yard worth of boys. There's like a zoo.

What's up here? Who are you? My name is Brian. I'm a new production tech here. Why or I? I. Okay. That's good.

That's worthy. Pass the first one. Brian. Brian. You go with the hammer? You go with some nails? Do you think it could mount the TV, Brian? I'll give it a shot.

Wait, so you're the new tech guy? Yeah. Do you work for Pete? I do. Go fucking kill yourself. We got to start encouraging that. We do.

More of that. All right, well, Brian, terrible to meet you. So you replaced Colby? I'm not sure. I thought Stanko did. Stanko replaced him.

You're not fucking Colby, dude. Where's Stanko's crazy ass? Stanko was crushing pizza pies this past weekend. I fucking saw him. Brian, welcome aboard. Thanks, man. Appreciate it. Just don't be like, oh, Pete's actually not a bad guy.

That's all I ask, okay? Don't defend him. Don't defend him. If you don't defend him, we'll get off well. You know his nuts don't work? Can't come. It's like an old mill. It just doesn't work anymore.

It's just a historic landmark. Are you my boss? I only work for men that can come. Sure. You can't be a boss. Sass was a quick no. Sass definitely doesn't think he has a boss. I think I have multiple bosses. I am constantly getting just drilled into. Hey, Sass, a quick no. Sass definitely doesn't think he has a boss. I think I have multiple bosses.

I am constantly getting just drilled into. Hey, Sass, by the way. Sass, what are you doing this week? Sass, you went very meta with your video last week. What do you mean? You did a video about how it's not cool to joke about dyslexia, and then people made fun of you or said that it was wrong to joke about dyslexia, and you deleted the video.

I deleted it on Twitter. It's still up but you but you did that you did the video to yourself what do you mean you made a video where the joke was like don't talk about dyslexia my dad had dyslexia yeah and then enough people said yo dude fucked up. Dyslexia is a real problem that you then deleted the video. Mm-hmm. Do you not see what I'm saying? It seems like a good enough reason. That was the joke. That was the joke.

Wild joke. The world did the joke on you. Your joke was that you could get canceled for saying anything, and then you got canceled for saying anything. Wait. Which actually was. It was. Because trolls were saying it. No. You think dyslexia has capers.. Which actually was. It was. Because trolls were saying it.

No. You think dyslexia has capers. No, it was. I swear. I could show you the accounts. It was not the trolls. He woke up the dyslexic community. It was not trolls.

You should have just typed out really long words. It was like not. What are they going to do? What are you going to do? Everything on one of the accounts. What does this say? Can you read this?

It's just actually accurate. You should have seen the bios of people who were saying shit. They were trigger warning people. Big trigger warning people. And they were like, not this cis white male being ableist right now. You know that's the joke.

You did it to yourself. Yeah, I know, but it's like, who gives a fuck about dyslexia? You! You deleted the tweet! You let them face you. You deleted the tweet! Dude, there was 90 quote tweets, 70 of them were calling me ableist. Being like, oh, Barstool strikes again.

Which is funny, because that's what the video... Barstool does it again with the ableist jokes. We've been striking a lot lately. Yeah, we have. Let's do a dyslexia tweet. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no. No, just tweet Sass's video from the Yak account. Get Rudy in here and let's see if it's a real thing. Yeah, Rudy's dyslexic.. Yeah. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no. No, just tweet Sass's video from the Yak account.

Get Rudy in here and let's see if it's okay. And tag Sass. I don't, I'm not, I thought the video was funny. I liked the video. Same.

I kept it up on Instagram and YouTube. I just didn't feel like dealing with the fucking annoying ass people in my mentions. That is the crux of the video. And this girl,

and so this girl quote tweets it and she's like, oh my God, like blah, blah, blah, white people aren't funny, blah, blah, blah. And then I'm like, okay, whatever. I don't really care. And then literally for like six hours, she's just adding to the thread, being like, oh, he works for Barstool. Oh, my God, I don't think any of his videos are funny. And then I block her, and then I block her and she's like, oh my God,

don't call him white. And I'm like, that's not why I blocked you. I blocked you because you've been talking about my video for the last six hours. I need to know what this is. I need to follow this woman.

She just fucking brought down the entire sass house. You have screenshots. So let's... I don't have screenshots. Let's not... Oh. KB wants it.

What's her name? I have no idea. Do dyslexic people even have food? Nah, never mind. I think that now that should, yeah. Sometimes you should

delete a tweet, right? Maybe not in your scenario. I didn't delete the tweet because I thought it was offensive. I deleted it because

I was just like annoyed. Just making their sandwich. You were totally not triggered. It wasn't delete the tweet because I thought it was offensive. I deleted it because I was just annoyed. Just making their sandwiches. You were totally not triggered. It wasn't. No, but I was like, no. It was like the video's been out for two days. I was like, it's ran its course. How are we going to put the rice inside the sushi?

There's a burger outside. We should have a dyslexic restaurant with just the bread on the inside. Just an empanada meat. But is that not the craziest shit ever? People getting mad about it. who cares about dyslexia? He's visually dyslexic. Unfortunately, it's not that crazy because it's like everyone just finds everything to be mad about. But it was like two years ago where people were making fun of Bella Thorne for being dyslexic.

Like the whole internet was making fun of Bella Thorne. Two years in internet time, brother. That's a fucking 20 years. I can't imagine being like, oh my God, making fun of dyslexia is offensive. Like your brain must be broken. That woman.

Their brain is broken. When they spell words wrong. Yeah, dude. Whoa, whoa, whoa. You just called a dyslexic person's brain broken? Yeah.

Yikes. I'm going to double down and say I just hate dyslexic people. Wow. I'm just going to go out there and say it. How are we going to

delete this though? How can we delete this after you get cold feet It doesn't need to be deleted because I don't care about dyslexic jokes. It seems like you do. I have ADD, so I'm allowed to make dyslexic jokes. Yo, can I get some Adderall? You're basically the

grammar police. No, I don't take any of that shit. You're a little child. So you still have a prescription, though? No, I haven't taken it in five years. Oh. Is that why you can't only do one video a week? I don't know. I just thought it was funny because it was the idea of the video and then it happened in real life. You're getting taken off my private story

after this. Fuck! Make fun of things people can control. Like AIDS. Did you get in trouble for that? No. Is that what you said? Oh, you didn't watch. Scott didn't watch fucking Rediscovering America. Oh.

Poo on you. Sheesh. Shit. Damn, you don't have 52 minutes to sit down and watch it. But I will say the teaser, the paparazzi thing, I watched that like at least 100 times. So that counts. That was like the funniest shit I've ever seen. Where they're like, Nick, what do you have to say about your straight dad? And you're like, please. Oh, that counts. That was like the funniest shit I've ever seen. Where they're like, Nick, what do you have to say about your straight dad?

And you're like, please. Oh, please. And you've got the scarf around your neck. Yeah. It was so fucking funny. How did that work? Can we get a little behind the scenes info on that? Hired the paparazzi.

You actually did? Yeah. Did you have to like tell them what to say? Yeah. Yeah. They usually do like bar mitzvahs is what they said. Really? Yeah. They were just like, yeah, we just like like bar mitzvahs is what they said. Really? Yeah.

They were just like, yeah, we just like the bar mitzvah. They're all freelance photographers. They're paparazzi. They said we are the first adults. It's usually just like teen girls, rich teen girls who want to feel like celebrities for 10 minutes. But it's also a weird gray area because they're also actual paparazzi as well. They're scumbags.

Yeah. For hire. Yeah. Bro, scumbag, paparazzi is an honorable position. so they're scumbags. Yeah. For hire. Yeah. Bro, scumbag, paparazzi's an honorable position. It's true. No, no, bro. You see what they did

to Britney, bro? Yeah, what about Diana? They took down Diana. They fucking killed Diana. They killed fucking, they're gonna kill Britney eventually. Diana's family.

You know how hard it is to wreck in a tunnel? Take a wrong turn? Just go straight. Go into the wall. Just go straight. Just go straight. Put on cruise control,

you would've lived Hey Guys don't talk about Diana like that Okay Too soon Way too soon I really want the at Of this woman though

I wanna follow her She sounds pretty cool I genuinely think What did she say She might have the power To take down all of us I don't wanna give anyone that power What were some keywords That she used I don't remember Come on bro What power. What were some key words that you used?

I don't remember. Come on, bro. What's your name? Don't be a pussy. Did she call you a cishet? No, she didn't. Her mentions did, though. Yeah.

Oh, shit. Guilty. You are a cishet. Can you just come to grips with it? Yeah. You are what you are. I am what I am. Stop trying to deny it.

And I'm proud of it, damn it. Oh, you're a proud boy? Oh, fuck. Bro, speaking of which, where is Brandon at? Speaking of proud boys, where is Brandon at? He hasn't been here in like a month. He's taking a vacation. No, he was in Omaha, and then I think he's in Mississippi.

I think he had a family member pass away. Oh, okay. Yeah. Good looks. You want to run that back? Run that bit back? Yeah, for sure jesus well that's where rico is right now jesus christ dude okay big cut all right we we got it we've we've gotten sidetracked here we got to get back to beetlejuice oh yeah what the fuck i think we already oh

steven said oh yeah there's a whole story that he has to tell. Oh, so for people who are late joining to the act, which I'll re-bump the stream right now. The commenters were probably pumped at the idea of me not being in season four. Nick and I were standing in the studio, catching up, and KB walked in, and then Steven walked in, and Steven goes, What's up, Beetlejuice?

And they both giggled, and Steven walked away. You tee-heed. Yeah. I snickered. It's from, and they both were at the wedding last night. You have product in right now? Yeah. You look like YP.

American Crew? Season 4. Is it vestigial? Is it? You guys don't know. It would have been funny if one of you guys had put like Is it Dr. Squatch? Like Aunt Viv

in Fresh Prince. You just had someone else come in for season 4 as Nick or KB. He's less sweaty. He's drier. Are we sponsored by Dr. Squatch soap? I don't think so.

Steve, what's up honey made? Are we sponsored by Dr. Squatch Soap? I don't think so. Do we need to get them? Steve, what's up, Honeymaid? It's your fill? Not bad, not bad. What's up, Gin and Tonic? Kyle Bauer. All right. Clean shot, clean shot, Steve.

You guys are on one. So last night at the wedding, myself, KB, and Zah were there Perfect 70 degree night Very cool It was evening time so it was dark We're outside and KB's wearing a nice suit Looks nice, we sent you guys the photo And he takes off his blazer

And he's wearing a very white shirt Oh no way So we're out on the paddock Under a jacket? A garish white shirt. Oh, no way. So we're out on the paddock. Wait, under a jacket? A garish white shirt. It's a wedding. Yeah. No, he looks good.

He looks good, yeah. I think he's putting up close. No, I literally just... This story is a very Stephen Chay story that nothing right now is under. I'm begging you to just tell just I'm gonna tell the climax okay okay so it's not gonna wow anybody yeah probably

take your time I mean immediately out there I notice a bug on KP so I'm like oh gross no gross wait it's outside? so we're wetting you take the good with the bad wait wait okay don't do this to me no you do this to yourself. Don't do this to me.

No, you do this to yourself. A bug? I can't do it. No, stop, stop. Don't ruin his story. White shirt, dark colored bug. Yeah. What type of bug are we thinking? It was a member of the Coleoptera family.

I don't know if it was a beetle necessarily. It could have been a more common bug. A roly-poly? It wasn't a roly-poly. So, whatever. You see, you're talking to a friend. You see a bug on him. You wipe it been a more common bug. A roly-poly? It wasn't a roly-poly. So, whatever. You see, you're talking to a friend, you see a bug on him,

you wipe it off. No big deal. The worst part was I would never wipe a bug off another man's body. No, I'd say, hey man,

you have a bug on you. That's rude. Next thing you know, he's trying to kiss you. That is the next, taking a bug off is third base. You gotta fight or fuck if someone takes a bug off.

Get Pat in here. Let's talk about this. It was like on his shoulder. It was whatever. So, anyway, five minutes later, the exact same bug lands on KB. Wait, I thought you didn't do anything the first time? I did. It wiped it off. It went away. It came back. Sounds like you petted it.

It came back five minutes later on again. Whatever. Wipe it off. Again. Kill the bug. No, back five minutes later on again. Whatever. Wipe it off again. Kill the bug. You don't know because then he's wearing a white shirt. Wait until you get to the end of this. An hour goes by. Yeah.

So KB and I go to get drinks. We're talking to other people. We reconvene. The bug finds him again. Shame bug. This is the third time. How do you know? I don't know if it's the same bug. Probably. Spell bug shit. Lands on him again shame bug this is the third time you know i don't know if it's the same but probably yeah um shit yeah lands on him again i'm just like this is crazy at some point somebody else comes up from behind him and wipes the bug off it was dave and his girl we were

chopping it up about the patient president getting assassinated and then that ruined it really fifth time yeah oh that was the guy with the beetle on me. Permanently. So at which point I say, KB, you know, it's dark out, you're wearing a light shirt, maybe the bugs would ever attract it to light. Maybe put your jacket on.

Puts his jacket on, no issues. A full like two hours later, we're inside eating dessert. This is like six hours later of the first month. How long did you guys hang out? It was like, I don't know, four or five hours.

So a couple hours later. Steven, you're the only one who uses hyperbole and it makes the story more boring. We're eating desserts at the dessert table inside with KB and my wife. Lemon tarts, pudding cups.

Yep. And the bug lands on KB again. Again? What? Inside on his black coat. I took a photo of it. Is this bug reincarnation? Can we put it up on the screen?

And that's how Che got the nickname Pudding Cup. The bug is actually Kyle's younger brother that he killed when he was five years old. That is right. Reincarnated. You definitely had it on a string. There's no doubt that you had a bug pet on a string. What a fuck. You're so full of bits. Yeah, you are. What kind of wacky

shit? What kind of weird brain shit? BYOB. I brought the bug. You actually put it in Maria Tolman. She's like, KB said KB and bug. That was your plus one. Yeah, my plus one was a bug. Brought it in a petri dish. Shut up. That's so fucking wacky.

Yep. Damn. And so what was the resolution of the bug? What happened after you saw it for the eighth time? Wait, are you getting the picture of the bug? Yep, we're getting it. This is actually payback for what you guys did to Ken Bone. I have pictures of Steven dancing solo.

Do you remember that, Sass, what they did to Ken Bone? Yeah, they put the brother in. I don't see. Oh, is that the bug? Look at your fart. That's the bug. Can we acknowledge how soggy you are? That's a shimmer.

Jay, no one cares about the dumbass bug. You're just making me look bad because I'm fucking sopping wet. Everyone was. That's not a shadow around his neck. The humidity was crazy. That guy in the background. How much moisture can one person get on their forehead? I wasn't the sweatiest.

He is dripping. Look at that fucking reflection. Look at that guy in the background, too. Dry as a napkin. Yeah, he is dry as a new napkin. You retain all water. I've never seen someone wear their water on their skin like that. All right.

Yeah, that jumped the shark long ago. So beetle space. Yeah, what happened here? A beetle landed on me a bunch of times. No, no, no. Tell us. Even tell the ending. When did you call him?

That's the ending. That's it. When did you call him Beetlejuice? Just this morning? Was that the first time? Just this morning. Yeah. The first time is when you guys heard it. Wait, that's the end of the story? Yes, of course it's the end of the story. That's it? When did you call Beetlejuice? Just this morning? Was that the first time? Just this morning. Wait, that's the end of the story?

Yes, of course it's the end of the story. What did you expect? I thought maybe Steven killed the bug? Yeah, twist? Some sort of twist. I mean, Beetle landed on him four times. It was pretty weird. How do you know it was the same Beetle?

It doesn't matter. Bugs weren't landing on anybody else. I can just imagine Che coming into work this morning just thinking, I can't wait to see KB. Epic weekend. What's up, Beetlejuice? What's up, Beetlejuice? This even really is like this is the office that Ryan started the fire. Beetlejuice.

I couldn't stop laughing about it when I was thinking about it. I know. He was giggling a lot. Your wife liked it too. What were you saying in the moment about it? Were you embarrassed? I was embarrassed. You don't want to be the guy with a beetle on you all the time.

I need you guys to swear to me. If there's ever a bug on me, you do not take it off. Well, it'll just come back anyway. A man does not take a bug off another man. Also, you can't steal KB's bit. He's Beetlejuice. Yeah. He's the bug guy.

You're the bug guy now. The wet bug guy. You can't just KB's bit. He's Beetlejuice. He's the bug guy. You're the bug guy now. The wet bug guy. You can't just put a piece of paper underneath it and let it crawl onto the piece of paper. Jay, will you blog that story? He's obsessed with that. I only got one picture of it. He was cackling about it. Howling.

After the second time, I could not stop laughing. I've never seen him so entertained. Now, this is good comedy. This is good. Unbelievable. Too funny. Wait a minute, Sass. Let's let Che open up for your first stand-up set.

And he tells that story. Really warms up the crowd. I actually think that there's a low-key chance he's the greatest anti-comedy person of all time. Without doubt. It is so funny, but it's not. Yeah, I told the story this morning to Smitty and Jeff D. Lowe, and it kind of went over like a fart,

and I was like, all right, maybe this won't be as good for radio. That's incredible for radio. Whenever a fart means it's funny. Our funniest episode was about just farts. It went over like a fart to Jeff Lowe, who's a fraud fart fan. Oh!

Oh, no. Yeah, we did this like two weeks ago, right? What? That was Ken Jack. No, it was Jeff Lowe. That Jeff Lowe doesn't in fact like farts? Yes, Jeff Lowe was like offended that KB was making a fart. I don't know.

This was on our show like two weeks ago. That was season three, dude. Who else was at the weddings? How many people were there? There were like 30 people there, maybe. 25, 30. Portnoy was there just dick out. Just hog out.

Those pictures were baffling. It's kind of weird that like people. Does he have half a boner in those? Well, people make fun of Dave's pants, but those same people spend like at least a minute or two zooming in and reposting his picture. Dude, look at your dick. I don't think the pants are bad. I don't care about the pants, but those pictures...

You are such a bootlicker. Those pictures were really... I mean, it's hard not to look. I'm looking at his penis. It would be really funny if they flopped clothes there. There's balls and... Balls is being a drunk dickhead. What?

Yeah. What do you mean? KB. Never mind. Cackled out of the cage. You're jealous. Snapped on me. You're jealous of Balls.

He snapped on you? Why? I told him to pull up a chair because he was standing at the table and he told me to fuck off. Is that true? Yeah. You guys fight? Rough and rowdy? Can you go get Balls? What table were you at? Who else was at the table and he told me to fuck off. Is that true? Yeah. You guys fight? Rough and rowdy?

Did you go get balls? What table were you at? Who else was at your table? I don't want to talk to him. All right, definitely get him then. It's real beef. Yeah, get him. Definitely get him.

I don't want to talk to him. This is real. No, it's fake. No, it's real. No, you're jealous of Glennie Balls. Who else was at your table? Who sat with you? Who did you sit next to?

What was the... Give us some deets, bro. I'm trying to fucking live by care. Yeah, I know. You guys are getting jealous. I was jealous from the jump. What do you mean getting jealous? I was jealous as well.

Why didn't you just tell us what happened? Have you been talking to... Did you been texting Dana? Her defense. Big Cat? Yeah. How did that all go down? That was the most excuse of all time.

Yeah, really bad excuse. You got a second COVID. How did he... go down? That was the dumbest excuse of all time. Yeah, really bad excuse. Second COVID. How did he explain his thought process? He's the worst version of Ferris Bueller. He can't be there and then he's just tweeting about change. Oh, did he just keep making a hug? Good thing we can't replace a zany mullet guy. Oh, fuck.

Oh, no. Oh, oh, oh. Balls with the slides. Uh-oh. Yeah. Balls with the slides. Uh-oh. Yeah. Balls has party voice. Party voice. Balls, what's up with you and KB having, like, legitimate beef now?

We don't have beef. I heard that there was beef. We're beefing? Why do you sound like Kesha right now? He said you yelled at him at the wedding. He said you snapped. What happened? You snapped?

That's how I joke around. You called him a finook and that's joking around He said you snapped. What happened? You snapped? That's how I joke around. You called him a finook and that's joking around? I did not. What happened? Tell us exactly what happened. You called him half a finook. He said you molested him. We're at the bar after the wedding and we're sitting down and Ball just keeps just standing next to me.

I was talking. I was like, sit down and pull the chair up. Stay a while. He told me to fuck off. There was a clear walkway. There was a clear walkway in the bar. There was other rooms. And he was telling me to pull the chair up. Stay a while. No, well, here's what happened. He told me to fuck off. There was a clear walkway. There was a clear walkway in the bar. There was other rooms. And he was telling me to pull the chair up in the walkway.

Ah. To pull the chair up in the walkway. And you don't fucking obstruct fire lanes. I mean, imagine the marshal coming through. He'd have a conniption. If you mess with the egress. It was a Sunday night. They were there late.

And it was right at the walkway. I was like, I can't pull a chair up in the walkway. And I was having a nice conversation with Greer about how underrated Nickelback is. And it was a nice conversation. No, that stinks, though. Everybody says that. Yeah, that's true. Now, did you see any bugs on KB?

Oh, wow. We almost saw aggro balls. Yeah, you almost snapped. He gets one Jersey Shore house and then turns into aggro balls. I'm fucking kidding. I like this because now we have the two most boring stories possible from this wedding. Zod, do you have something?

No. Oh, no, I got nothing. No, come on. I got nothing. Tell us about the dinner. I got nothing. What'd you eat? I had the chicken.

Oh, what? Yo. Is he good? You're fucking nuts, bro. Sweet potato. Any bread? Nah, no bread. Can we clip that from season four?

He had the chicken. When Che saw us all this morning, he was like, what's up, chicken wing? What's up, chicken tender? There it is. I'm looking for something chicken related. I actually called you in, Paul, because I heard a great story about you, and I want you to confirm or deny. Yeah. You moved into a Jersey shore house.

Yeah. Your mom moved you in okay yeah she dropped me why are you defensive already he didn't say anything yet he didn't say anything why are you being defensive the your mom might have done a sweep of the house to make sure there wasn't anything in the house that could quote-unquote scare glenny maybe I don't know that she did. I mean, MB was there too, so I guess she did. What do you mean you don't know if she did? Did she make you sit in the car for five minutes? I didn't instruct her and say, hey, please

de-ghost to this house. So what did she do? Did she go through like sage? Are you talking about like pests? No, Beetlejuice, relax. Oh no. You hadlejuice, relax. Oh, no. You had to be there, Glenn.

Oh, no. Beetlejuice is all fired up. About to bug the house. BJ. Oh, I'm sorry. BJ Penn over there. Beetlejuice. What's wrong?

Scare in terms of ghosts. KBJ swag. And there weren't any. I didn't know this happened. I guess MB't any. I didn't know this happened. I guess MB saw it. I did not know this happened, which I'm not going to say it didn't because it very well may have. So that means that your mom just goes into every room before you get there to de-ghost it. I wish.

Forever. A little recon mission. Yeah. I don't like ghosts. The house is an older house, so it's kind of warranted. That shit's haunted. So she turned over paintings and stuff? I don't know.

I don't know this occurred. She's probably looking for safes or something behind the paintings. She's pulling every book out of the shelf. Any trap doors here? Any spiral staircases? I just love it. I love that your mom's, that's ride or die. You go de-ghost everything?

Very much something she would do, probably. But Glenn, I thought that you liked ghosts. Remember your long conversation with Lane Johnson about having a ghost hunting show? I enjoy—I'm scared of ghosts. You like to hunt for ghosts. But I enjoy the idea of ghosts, if that makes sense. Yeah. So why is your mom robbing you? I enjoy them.

I mean, they're scary. They're paranormal creatures. Yeah, but I thought that you wanted to hunt them, and now your mom is kind of hunting before you. Maybe she just likes to ghost hunt. I would like to hunt the ghosts. I mean, me and Marty made one ghost hunting video last year. It was pretty fucking creepy. Are you scared of dyslexic people?

I don't know. What do you think about a dyslexic ghost? I don't know. Ooh. That would be crazy. That has been reincarnated as a beetle. Oh, now that's... Oh, no.

A dyslexic ghost that's been reincarnated as a beetle. Yo, what's this Harry Potter shit? That's fucking crazy. I do like famous ghosts. I find that very interesting. What do you mean famous? Name your five favorite famous ghosts. Name a famous ghost.

Like Abraham Lincoln. That's just a person. That's just Abraham Lincoln. No, I have famous people. Next one. No, ghosts that are only famous for being a ghost. Casper. Casper's got to be on there.

Casper. We've got to give you guys. Then what's your top five? Abraham Lincoln being a ghost. Yeah. Casper. Casper's got to be on there. We've got to give, yeah. What's your top five? Abraham Lincoln. Abraham Lincoln. No. JFK.

David Duke. It can't all be presidents or men. No, there's one, there's one. Susan B. Anthony. Yes, that's good. Name a female ghost.

Name one female ghost. Marilyn Monroe. How do you know she's a ghost? She's a ghost. You don't think she passed on? There's one. I watched a ghost adventure. Tubman.

Harriet Tubman. They did it at the fucking comedy store in LA. They said the comedy store was haunted. And they said it's- Joan Rivers. By all old people. Oh, yeah. Janine.

Who's that big-tittied comedian? Bette Midler, right? Bette Midler. That's who it is. Can confirm. I mean, I think famous ghosts are cool. I got Abraham Lincoln haunts the White House, per se. Says who?

I've never heard that. You've never heard that? No. Oh, my God. Martha Washington is up in there. Oh, my God. Martha Washington. Isn't that a different?

The White House was burned down in 1812. What are the ghosts that fuck you? That makes it all the more haunted. Think about Martha Washington. The old White House haunts the current one. There's one. I think there's a first lady that she haunts the garden, I believe. And Abraham Lincoln haunts the current one. There's one, I think there's a first lady that, she haunts the garden, I believe. And Abraham Lincoln haunts the bedroom, I'm pretty sure.

That's just Hillary Clinton being like, is my seat ready? I'm not making this up. Joe Biden's dog is out there hunting. Can dogs become ghosts? Joe Biden's scary ass dog. Speaking of Clinton, Roan, are you beefing with Chelsea? Oh, yeah. Roan, you do have beef with Chels.

I just think that it's funny to make fun of how tall that boy is. I just think that that shit, yeah, bro. You do have beef with Chels. I just think that it's funny to make fun of how tall that boy is. I just think that that shit's funny, dude. He's fucking... He's taller than the girl Tommy brought home with the Jersey Shore.

Yeah. What? Whoa. All right, TMI. Bro. Look at Tommy. I thought that four. A flat colossal.

A true flat colossal. She's a flat colossal. Did Tommy fuck a flat colossal? Not 6'4 for a girl. Which is good for him. Actually true flat cloth. She's a flat cloth. Did Tommy fuck a flat cloth? Not 6'4 for a girl. Which is good for him. Actually 6'4. He's wearing a neck gaiter around his neck. Not 6'4 for a girl.

Just a real 6'4? It's just COVID. A neck gaiter around my penis. Oh my God. There's a lot to unpack here. I want to start with though, Barron Trump. I thought that picture was Photoshopped.

No. It was insane. It's so bad. How tall is he? 6'7. 7'8. They had to use a panoramic lens. It was insane. How tall is he? 6'7". They had to use a panoramic lens sideways. I've never seen anything like this. He is so fucking tall.

It's awesome. He's in the video of him playing soccer. It's so funny. Look at him. Yak fan, number one. I can't believe... Sorry, that's real, right? right by the way I'm not even making fun of him I think he's just

a fucking like he is probably he could definitely beat the fuck out of Trump he's a healthy tall boy no he's not one of those weird like skinny

bug tall kids no he's just built well yeah and he has long ass legs he's not he's not

oh no he's 11 years old he's like 13 he growing. He's 11 years old. He's like 13. He's 11. The leaven? Look how high his waist is. It's like an indicator of like... I fucking love it. I want this guy to be president. Can we get the picture of him playing soccer?

We should hire him. More pictures of Barron. Do you think we could hire him? They're going to turn the Oval Office like one of those indoor skydiving chambers that's just like straight up and down for him to even just be able to fit into it once he's president he will definitely be president mark my fucking words yep prince was promised be with us for a second who are you texting dial in dial the fuck in

are you on the show what What are you talking about? I thought I was just invited to talk wedding. How tall was the girl Tommy hooked up with at the shore? 6'4". She was tall. Would I start her at power forward or center? She was swing forward. She was like...

Yukon tall? I was talking to her at one point. What would Gino Auriemma say? Would Gino Auriemma get a letter of intent? I was talking to her And we were on an elevated surface Maybe a foot or two in the air And then she got up with us

She was huge Well before she got up you guys were face to face Close You on stage heard not You were on scaffolding Yeah let's talk about that let's dive into

that a little bit he brought her back they didn't take off her shoes they were like who stepped

in village god take your shoes off tracking village all through the house were you one

of the people that was on the stage at the bar oh yeah we all were how's the Jersey Shore house? Is it...

Okay, so... Kind of look like trash. It's your house. It looks like a trash. It's an older house, but it's a nice shore house feel. It's right on the beach.

It's right across from the beach. There's a great porch to hang out on. Was there shit everywhere, anywhere? I heard there was a shit problem.

Everywhere, anywhere? Check one box. Anywhere or everywhere. Which I know everybody points fingers at the frigging fat guys when it comes to the shit. Yeah, you do. And farts. That was my one con, as I know everyone was talking about. That's why your mom went through.

Shitting on Barstool vs. America. There were some tough shits there. Because there's only two bathrooms. One of them is like next to the kitchen. You don't shit on the bus. You don't shit on the bus. I didn't shit on the bus. But that was your whole first episode. The only thing you were talking about was,

I want to shit. Are you girls here? Can I shit? This house was a bad scenario as well. Oh, there's only two bathrooms? There's only two bathrooms. One of them is next to the kitchen. You know what you should do because you are rich.

Jeff Bezos, no big deal. Can we stop that? You kind of are. Yeah, but just bring a port-a-potty. Sass, is he rich? Sass knows everyone's finances in the office. Yeah, he's doing well. If you want something, you get it.

You should, though, rent a porta potty for the summer. Yes. And put a lock on it in the backyard. I can't shit on a porta potty. But it's your fault. You shit in it. It's like a hot Long Island. Yeah, you guys can't use the word in.

You just haven't discovered it yet. You can't shit on a porta potty. You can't stand on lines. I dare you to figure out about the word in. You can get a nice ass porta potty. The white ones with the stairs going up to it. There's a sink in there. They don't only have the green ones.

They're blue and red. What are you talking about? They make ones that have the green ones that they have at carnivals. They're blue and red. Where are you talking? I don't know what. No, they make like. They make ones that have like nice marble tops. I've never seen that. Y'all talking about bathrooms. Never walked through those doors. No, I've never been in one either, but they have.

Inside. They build a whole structure around it. How much money does he have that he could use on a port-a-potty? You probably have $5,000. A couple racks. I'm not spending $5,000 on a port-a-potty? You probably have 5,000 you could spend. A couple racks? Yeah. I'm not spending 5,000

on a port-a-potty. To shit comfy? It is stuff. I mean, Owen, did you shit in the bathroom by the kitchen? No. Because that's not a shit bathroom.

Owen. Like, you know, in the Philly house, you know what I was saying a few months ago? That the downstairs bathroom was not a shit bathroom. Like, you can't shit

in that bathroom. Even though I kind of did a few times. But you still can't shit in that bathroom. We kind of did. You shit in there? It didn't even, like,

close the door for that bathroom. But then there's only one upstairs. That's but you still catch it in that bathroom. We kind of did. You shit in there? It didn't even close the door for that bathroom with a shutter. You could see through it. That's where everyone is. That's where the girls were sleeping. It's tough.

The ladies. It's a tough shit scenario. Okay, run down the roster, GB. Who is in there? Take me back. Casey, Kelly, Devin, and Maria.

They're all shitting? Say less. Oh, God. Yeah, where'd the girls shit at? No, that's not it. Or are you saying that the entire weekend they held their shit? Steven, without doxing, could you just pull up port-a-potty rentals on the internet for us?

I want you to be comfortable. Why don't we call one right now? Yeah. Say it's Glenny Balls from Barstool. I can't shit in a port-a-potty. Would it help if you knew it was Glenny Balls from Barstool? I can't shit in a port-a-potty. Would it help if you knew it was Glenny Balls from Barstool? Would that help with your port-a-potty rental? What's your ghost policy with these port-a-potties? You know what is sweet, though?

I can't believe they did this for me. I'm B's the queen. They actually got me an inflatable hot tub. Really? Yeah. He gets what he wants. Look at this. All right, here we go.

Oh, my God. Stunning. Those are nice. That's nicer than most bathrooms I shit in. Seth, that's not the universal green port-a-potty you were referring to. right, here we go. Oh, my God. That's stunning. Those are nice. $3.95. Sass, that's not the universal green port-a-potty you were referring to. No, that's also not the nice one. No, that's not the nice one. Sass and I know what we're talking about. You don't want urinal.

Me and Big Cat were just looking at them for him. Yeah, we were just... Of course, he obviously has more to spend than Lenny. Get one with flowers on the door. Sass actually is so sick of his apartment. The classic, the classic. Wait, wait. Let's see the classic. Oh, the classic one's fancy of his apartment. The classic. Wait, wait. Let's see the classic.

Oh, the classic one's fancy. Oh, the wooden one. Oh, yeah. Oh, wow. It's like a sauna. Wow. Oh, shit. Oh, my God.

Look at this. Nostalgic toilet paper. Oh, yeah, that's good. That was like the best toilet in the world. Get some splinters on your ass. Yo, this is... Oh, it has the crescent.

It has the crescent. Yeah, you gotta have it with the moon. That's like some Muslim shit. Oh, my has the crescent? Yeah. You've got to have it with the moon. That's like some Muslim shit. No. Oh, my God. Okay. Different angle that you took there?

The moon is the crescent moon. What is the crescent moon? The moon is Muslim. It's universal. Everybody sees it. What is the pricing? The moon. The Muslims own the moon.

I thought it may have been like Swedish, but no. Turkish maybe. Wait, what's the fountainhead? Dave got C&D'd on his To the Moon merch by Islam. To the moon. It's been hiding in plain sight all along. Don't say they hijacked it. That's fucked up.

Say that. She's painting? My painting? No. Yeah, there's a lot of paintings for you. They're out there on our desk. The twin towers. There's a 9-11 one.

But what's in front of KB's Twin Towers? It's like a blue and... Oh, I did see it. I did see it. It's me in front of the Twin Towers. And they're like burning. Thank you, Alejandro. You look responsible.

I will be. I will be hanging that up. There's blood on your hands. Peeping off your hands. KB did 9-11 type vibes. Type vibes. Glenn, any more juice or you want to go back

to the group chat? No group chat, no group chat. No, what else happened? I mean, it was fun. I had a great time. I'm very excited. How long do you have this rental for? For all of July.

So actually this week. Oh, July's halfway over, buddy. Well, we got the next three weekends. So this week we're actually starting doing events and shit. We got two events this weekend that I'm very excited about. We got one on Thursday and Friday.

What do you mean events? You guys doing like a concert? You walk up on the stage and throw napkins? Yeah, I'm doing Billy Joel. No, I think we're doing like a high noon event on Thursday night. What the fuck do you mean events? What is the event? What is the performance?

It's just like a barstool night, I think. It's like a high noon event. Just go and drink? People get to meet you. When we were at Barstool vs. America, we had the five cities. Every night in the five cities we had an event kind of where we would just go and do high noon stuff. Glennie, I heard a rumor. We were that Thursday night at Parker House.

I heard a rumor about this past weekend that after people were meeting you at the bar, you were telling them, glad you got to meet me. Yeah, I know. And sending them away. You were saying, glad you got to meet me and just fucking sending them away. I did not do that. No, but yeah, it was a lot of fun. I heard otherwise, Glenn.

I wanted to go to Parker House, so that's exciting. And yeah. I heard you just gave them a business card and said, glad you got to meet me, Glennie Balls.

You'll remember this forever. I won't. I'll forget about it in two minutes. You'll remember forever. This will go in your eulogy. I would never do something like that. I just thought they should have

given you a nicer house. I thought that they should have given you like a high-end, new-ish house. Not something built in the 70s, but maybe like the aughts. It reminds me of Whitecaps. It has that vibe.

It has a Whitecaps vibe. What's that? Yeah, I don't know that. I don't know either. It's the Sopranos house. It's the short house together with the Sopranos. Sorry.

What a season. Season four. End of season four. Oh, God. Tony was going gonna get it Foxers Oh That house is nicer

You think white cap's Nicer than this house Yeah This house also You gotta take it With like a grain of salt Look the outside of it Looks a little raggedy

But the inside's nice Was there TV Oh yeah Yeah Oh yeah Color Color How many

Bent screen There's a TV In I think every room And then there's a nice Living room TV Wow There's a big dining room Oh yeah Yeah? Oh yeah Color? Color How many? Bent screen? There's a TV in I think every room And then there's a nice living room TV Wow There's a big dining room There's a good kitchen What are you making a face at? There's a TV in every room

There's a TV in my room There's a TV in Do you have your own room? Me and Marty shared a room Nice Jeff D. Lowe had his own room Why are you saying like that? What?

Because he wasn't even on the winning team. No, I don't want to go to my room. I picked my room. He's scared of ghosts. He doesn't want to be in my room. Isn't that scared

of ghosts? It's great. I'm very happy with it. It's a great little house. All right, well, we'll get you a port-a-potty. Nice one. We'll work it out.

I did my shits. I did the shits. Where? In both bathrooms. Wow. You know what I do? As soon as I get in there, I throw on a Guy Fieri video on YouTube just to drown out the... So everyone just knows, hey, what's that Guy Fieri?

That's the loudest thing you can find. Yeah, that's what you... Let me explain. Music's weird. Who's listening to Guy Fieri in the bathroom? Must just be taking a piss. It was just fucking... I watched the top five burgers ever on Triple D

for like all weekend. To drown out the sound? As soon as I got there, I do the first push out, and I watch like 20 seconds. The first push out. Oh, man. All right.

Good shits, too. It's a great place, though. You should come. You should come three weekends. No, I don't think so. No, no. You should go. I'll go.

Yeah, I'll go. You know what? I'll go. You can probably share a bed with Jeff D. Lowe no You should go I'll go You know what I'll go You can probably share a bed With Jeff D. Lowe Yeah let's fucking go Head to toe with Jeff D. Lowe You said it was de-ghosted right Oh it's de-ghosted

Alright I'm in It's de-ghosted Dude I gotta go to this event This fucking event You guys are playing They're fun People meet me They're a lot of fun

See them perform live I wanna go to Parker House These Jersey Shore bars They're like They're like Shane Rel like Shangri-La Like the party game Kind of You hear about them

For so long I've heard about Parker House my whole life I've heard about DJs My whole life I've heard about Bar A my whole life This is like

You ever been to a game At Wrigley Or Lambo You ever do the Fucking OD And fucking Ocean City That's exactly what I'm saying

Parker House Death Valley Parker House is one of those bars. I've partied at the best places, the most notable places in the world. If you're a real goomba, you have to be able to claim these things before you're able to serve.

You're not a party guy, too. That's the craziest part. No way. DJs was probably going nuts yesterday. Let me tell you that. For real? Yeah, with the fucking Paisans. Oh, my God.

Yeah, you're a Paisan. Yeah, I'm a Paisan. That's why we're taking Joey Gallo tonight. We're on a hot streak right now. Were you throwing? The Italians are on a hot streak. There we go. Joey Gallo or Joey Votto?

That's how much of a Paisan you are, that you thought that Joey Gallo was on the Reds hitting home runs. What? Are you talking about the home run derby? Yeah, Joey Gallo. Not Joey Votto? Is Joey Gallo Italian? Yeah.

I looked it up. Really? He's from Vegas. Not Joey Votto? Is Joey Gallo Italian? Yeah. I looked it up. Really? He's from Vegas. Am I an idiot? He's a nice paisan from Vegas. It is nice to, like, if you're Italian, anyone with a vowel last name, you're like, that's an Italian. You know, actually, shockingly, Pete Alonso's not Italian. I thought he was.

No, he's Italian. I would like him to be Italian tonight, though. Yeah, no, he's Italian. Those are the two guys I bet. I bet Gallo and Alonso. Love it. They're in different brackets. Hopefully, it's an all-Italian final.

It'd be great. All right. Well, Glennie, thank you. Did you happen, by the last question, did you happen to notice that there was a bug on KB's arm? No. Four times last night? Not currently. No.

When we were outside on the dance floor. Oh, yeah. And inside. Inside, outside. Well, I was actually. Indoor, outdoor bug. Actually, Steve, give Glennie a recap. I was seated in the. I couldn't see anything, I was actually. Indoor, outdoor, bugged out. Steve, give plenty a recap. I was seated in the.

I couldn't see anything. I was looking at the wall last night. What? My seat at the table, I couldn't see anything. You're just looking at a wall? You couldn't see anything. I was in the corner. What do you mean you couldn't see anything?

Turn your head. I was in the corner. Turn your body. Turn your head. Is your neck still injured? I couldn't see no lie on you. I was in the corner looking at the wall. How was Marina's wedding?

I don't know I was staring at a wall the whole time You were at a table looking at a wall? And I was the guy who had my back to the whole room But you could have turned I had my back to the whole room You would see somebody in front of you I don't turn well That's the pussy eating accident

It takes a lot to turn He's got a neck problem. You need workman's comp from eating pussy. This guy needs a new insurance plan from eating too much pussy. I agree. I mean, if you put it on Glennie's draft tape, he will eat pussy until he's physically not able to anymore. Yeah, until he's full. Yeah, yeah.

You got heartburn. He's taking Zantac for pussy. Glennie Balls will eat pussy until he's full. You got heartburn. He's taking Zantac for pussy. Plenty balls. We'll eat pussy till he's full. Non-stop motor. That just sounds so gross. He plays through the whistle. Yeah, he does.

Too much sometimes, honestly. He'll get dirty sometimes. You don't care any conditions. Get out of here. Get out of here, buddy. This is fun. Thanks, guys. Send in Tommy. Let's't care any conditions. Get out of here. Get out of here, buddy. I can't say this is fun. Thanks, guys. Send in Tommy.

Let's hear about that fucking FC. No. He doesn't kiss and tell. He doesn't eat box and tell. Are you at the Shore House? KB, are you going to go

to the Shore House? I'm really thrown off by this event. I would not. I know what they're... I would not recommend going. Really? Why? It was very uncomfortable.

Why? I feel like someone needs to knock them off the high horse a little bit. There is a little bit of a high horse. There is a very big high horse that was formed. It's going around. It's like fucking COVID. Yeah, no. What the hell is an event?

Well, no, I understand what he's saying. It's a meet and greet at the bar. A little payola. We'd never do an event. Well, no, that I understand what he's saying. It's a meet and greet at the bar. A little payola. We'd never do an event. But it's different if the event is offering a form of entertainment rather than

just being like... You don't think Glennie just being Glennie? I guess. He'll group text right in front of you. He'll just be in his phone like you will be able to see it at arm's length. Wait, so are you going to go? Definitely not. To the Jersey Shore?

No. Never? Never. Roan? No. They ID there. It's not like New York, bro. It's not like you could just do whatever you want.

I'm not going to go. Are you going to go? No, sir. Seriously, I feel like you're going to end up there. Me? Yes. For one night. Yes.

And you'll be like, I don't want to be here, guys. And have the time of your life. I promise you if Nick went to DJ's, he would kill himself. You promise? Nick, please go to DJ's. Oh, man. I told you I was the last of my. Yeah, that's true.

I got a target on my back already. KB, you going to go? I'm not above or below it. I think KB would thrive down there. Definitely. Yeah. To have fun, yeah. Because it's also. Tell me if I'm wrong above or below it. I think KB would thrive down there. Definitely. Yeah. To have fun, yeah. Because it's also, tell me if I'm wrong here, Owen,

you have to be, like, okay with kind of living in a little bit of, like... Squalor. Yeah. Like, people, I haven't been in that, it's almost like a bachelor party. Like, you're just in a setting where first person who wakes up, everyone's up for the day. Yeah. Like, last person to go to sleep, that's when everyone goes to sleep.

You have to poop sneakily. Yeah. That's not vacation for me. That sounds like hell. Well, you're like an old soul, bro. You also piss. You and I just like to drink IPAs and chill. No, but I don't know.

Is your house clean right now? Is your room clean? Is your bathroom clean? No. My only problem with going there will be the sleeping arrangements. I'm trying to think. I don't know. Is your house clean right now? Is your room clean? Is your bathroom clean? I don't know. My only problem with going there will be the sleeping arrangements. I'm trying to think. Who is the most miserable between these three?

And then waking up. Who? Nick, Owen, and Sass. Nick, Sass, and Owen. Not even the sleeping arrangements. It would be more the waking up the next morning for me and being there with all these people from work. The hate. That wouldn't go well for me. And then all of a sudden you wake up.

Raging hangover. Sun's beaming through the window. I get intense anxiety. In your eyes. You look over. It's Kelly Keegs and Bibbs in one bed. It's Rhea and Dev in the other. And then all of a sudden out of nowhere you hear.

Guy Fieri's top five burger reviews. I think Guy Fieri's in our bathroom. He's trying to drown the sound of him shitting with a series of a man who's just like chewing food. Who's that guy chewing a burger in the bathroom? It's like how people run water so they can pee easier. He literally was like, yeah, I think playing music would be weird. Yeah, music would be weird. I feel like it's a normal thing to play music in the bathroom.

Actual shit coming out of his ass. Guy Fieri's like, this burger is banging, bro. I don't understand. Everyone's like overwhelming stress about where to shit. Like we're there for 48 hours. Right. Maybe just like shit once. Go to the Starbucks down the street.

It's not hard. As soon as everyone gets there, like where are we shit? I would just eat a lot of cheese. Or just shit in the bathroom. Yeah. What the hell is the problem with you? It's like, he was like, that's not a shit bathroom. I don't know if you know this, but girls were there too.

Okay. Girls don't know that we poop and vice versa. It's a little dirty little secret. Nick wouldn't be able to go. Mine's not a girl issue. Mine's just you can't shit. I don't like it. The only time I shit is when it's an emergency.

Yeah. I almost shit myself yesterday coming up the staircase at our apartment. Really? Nice. Legitimately was on its way out. Whoa. And then you got to the bathroom, sat down, and the poop came out? Right away. Shut up. Didn't even need Guy?

Didn't even need Guy. You think we should start playing Guy Fieri videos? And see if no shit? Yeah, see if poop will just start coming out of his mouth. Yeah, it's coming out of Glennie. He's conditioned. He's pavloffed to shit every time he hears Guy Fieri. We should, like, connect Glennie's phone to, phone to a Bluetooth speaker and put it in the bathroom.

Oh, God, no! Imagine you walk by the bathroom and it's just Guy Fieri's burger reviews are playing like an excruciating loud sound. He just crowns when he hears something's out of bounds. So, Owen, did you have fun, though? Yeah, it was fun. If I were... Fuck. The mean it looks like If I were Fuck The beach looked nice

If I were 12 years younger It would be the fucking Best thing ever Yeah It was fun You stood on the stage At the bar The stage thing is where I

The stage thing is where I That's where the high horse Comes from you think? I think I would have to leave Like wherever we were If people were standing On the stage I left DJ's

What were they standing on the stage for? Like VIP treatment on the stage. Yeah, I guess. Like lip syncing and singing along to the music. I don't do great in crowded settings to begin with. Neither do I. I'd say that everyone needs to be brought down a peg and humbled, but you could tell that it's like a cockiness level

that it would be like a parent getting abused and then abusing their child. They would just go and be an asshole, a bigger asshole to someone else if you were like KB, just fucking write a mean blog about them and a bunch of jokes and bring them back down. They would just externalize that onto someone else and

fucking be... It might be too far. Everyone might be too far gone into celebrity. Need Dave to come and just crack the whip on everybody. That's what I mean, bro. I think that they would take that and they would just try and act like it's a pledge at a frat getting hazed. And then trying to act how Dave acted towards them, towards someone else down the line. Be cyclical, yeah.

Back to shitting yourself. Okay. I was on a walk with a girl, and I had to poop my pants. Okay, okay. But I didn't want to say it. Wait, you had to poop? No, you had to poop. You didn't have to poop your pants.

Wait, you were like, you needed to poop. I actually had to poop, but then I went and put pants on. Oh, shit. I got to poop my pants. No, I had to poop my pants. Who's this guy? Who are these people? This boy is fucking...

This boy is Amish Who's this boy and man? He has to be like a It's a boy-man combo Crypto kid This boy's about to fucking raise a barn What's with this boy-man combo? You guys are fucking

That's certainly not father-son You know, I think it is Exactly That's a boy-man combo That guy's a son of a boy dad It's a boy-man combo That's a father and son It's funny because that kid

Probably has like 11 million followers on TikTok or some shit. Should we go? I don't know. He's got an Amish-ass dad. Unless not. Surely you guys are dying to hear the end of my story. I thought that was the end. No, I had to shit myself.

I had to shit my pants. Yeah. But I lied and said I had to throw up. So then I went to a rest stop and I shit for a while. But I said I said I had to throw up So then I went to like a rest stop And I shit for a while But I said I threw up Nice It's kind of the same thing

By the way Yes Kind of throwing up out of your butt I'm really curious as to who these people are Should I grab them? Go just ask Don't put them on Don't ask

Try to do it without using words Just touch Oh no Oh gas Oh it's the boy man combo Go go go go go go go Who's the boy man combo. Go, go, go, go, go, go, go. Who's the boy man? Just introduce yourself.

Be like, introduce yourself. Wait, what's Stanko get? Salad? He doesn't need that. Oh, come on, Owen. Owen. Ask. Ask.

Ask. Owen. Pete. Did they go into Erica's office? Yes, but Erica, she's not here, though. He's not here today. He would have said if she was in. She's not here.

I don't know. Go, go, go, go, go. I know. Imagine if Erica was here today. That would have been the greatest thing ever. Oh my God, E would be fucking roasting it right now. E. Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it.

Hey, who are you guys? Who is this guy? Oh, wait, is that? Who is this guy? Oh, wait. Is that? I love this. I love that. Who is this guy? It can't be going well.

This is actually, people are like, oh, my God. We want to hear the end of Owen's story. No, we don't. But this is part of season four. We've added a whole new cast of characters to walk in. Yeah. A bunch of guest stars. Oh.

Are they coming? Oh. Oh. Nice. It didn't go. Are they coming? Oh. Oh. Nice. It didn't go well, did it? Oh, no. The boy and the man. What's up, man?

How's it going? How we doing? Dude, wearing a fucking KK hat. What's up? Grab a seat. Wisco. Wisco, stand up, brother. Let's go.

What's up, man? Is this over? Yeah. Yeah. Right here? Yeah. Is that good? What's up?

Am I close enough to the mic? Yeah. Whoa. We just threw out. Who are you? My name is Max. Okay. Went to Wisconsin.

Love it. Yeah. All right. Thanks for coming in, man. Appreciate you, man. No, we just, we were, it's not often a boy-man combo walks in. Yeah, we were surprised by the boy-man combo. The BMC.

Yeah, so what's up with the, what's the boy-man? So, I started a company a few years ago called Line Leap. Started out in Wisconsin. A couple of my co-founders went to Michigan. Okay. So partnered with Popular College Bars on busy nights, game days, whatever. You can skip the line, use the app. It's kind of like a Disney Fast Fast for college bars.

I love it. That's a great idea. And then how does the man come in? Man? The man, please speak. They raised a bunch of money and hired old people. Fuck yes. And I like that you were in the KK hat because that always has a long line and it's difficult to get into.

Exactly. Exactly. It sounds like you just created an entire app where you could just be a football player on the team. Basically, yeah. It gives everybody that. Everyone that. Yeah, right. Or a team. Basically. It gives everybody that. Everybody that. Wrestler, yeah. Yeah, right.

Or a wrestler. Yeah. We actually created an app that everybody can pretend they're a football player. Beautiful. Or a wrestler.

Or a wrestler. All right. That's a sick idea. That is a great idea. Appreciate it. It's awesome. Yeah. Good to meet you guys.

Yeah, good to meet you. Huge fan, by the way. I like that. Listen to part of my take. Are we talking about Owen? Love it. I thought you were talking about Owen. I like the boy man vibe you guys got going appreciate it yeah it's like a little bit of this a little bit of that hey guys don't be too hard on these guys all right guys

come on guys it's a little boy i do love a boy man combo i never realized how much i like a boy man it's a very funny combo when it's not father-son. Especially when they're not father-son. Sometimes you want a little bit of this. Boy, it's a little something for me. A little something for you, a little something for me. I was like me and Big Cat. My, my, my. It's a fastball on the off-speed. You see those combos a lot.

Decisions, decisions. That's actually a good idea. I'm sure a lot of the Barstool people would love that here. Walking into DJs. Yeah, I'm good. lot of the Barstool people would love that here. Walking into DJ's. Yeah, I'm good. Fast pass. It's funny that he's wearing that hat though because that's the bar that

the line is around the block. Last time we were in Wisconsin, we couldn't even get in. We were like, tell them you know me. And they still didn't want to let us in. Yeah, a bouncer came out and he's like, what's up Big Cat? Huge fan. I was like, can we get in? He's like, no. You needed a boy. Yeah, I was a guy, like a bouncer came out. He's like, what's up, Big Cat? Huge fan. I was like, can we get in? He's like, no. I was like, okay, cool.

You needed a boy. Yeah, I needed a boy. Or that app. Yeah. I was going around at Wrigleyville just telling everyone I know. Nice. Or Wrigleyfield, not Wrigleyville. Well, Wrigleyville is around.

Go telling everyone I know, Big Cat. Nice. We got that win, though. I know. Because of you. Smoked him. I'm the lucky first. Did you hang out with Caucasian James?

No, he texted me. What? What happened? Well, I didn't know he Because of you. Smoked him. I'm the lucky first. Did you hang out with Caucasian James? No, he texted me. What? What happened? Well, I didn't know he was in Chicago, and that was my last day. But you don't make time for Caucasians? The guy could have potentially saved your life that one time you had a collapsed lung that wasn't a collapsed lung. He had plans that night, and I was leaving the next morning.

What? What was his plans? I don't know. And then didn't he hang out with Dana Beers? He did? I think so. I like Caucasian James.

Yeah, me too. He's a nice guy. Well, you've never met him. He's a brother to me. You've never met him. I know. I've had plans to meet him like ten times.

But he just hangs out with Dana Beers instead. Yeah. Yikes. I feel like Marina, kind of. I know I've had plans to meet him like 10 times. But he just hangs out with Dana Beers instead. Yeah. Yikes. I feel like Marina kind of. I know. I can't believe Dana went without excuse. That's a tough one.

What was his actual reasoning? He wanted to go to this game? Did he forget he made that excuse? I don't know. Because people are going to see him at the game. Right. He's taking a lot of heat lately. You got to go, Roan? I do. All right, Roan's got a lot of heat lately. Oh, you got to go,

Rowan? I do. All right, Rowan's got to go. I got to go. All right, Owen, you got Rowan? Mm-hmm.

All right. He's taking a lot of heat lately. From what? Just like the Pink Whitney thing. Yeah. Also, in that video,

he takes off his Pink Whitney jersey as soon as the camera goes under him. He didn't plan that out. But the thing with Dana is, and I know

I've seen a lot of heat, you have to remember that he has the mind of like a Labrador retriever. So it's not you can't. Like, can you be mad at your dog for doing something dumb? No, of course not. You can momentarily, and then you're like, oh, you're cute. Chug another beer. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Yeah. And he is cute. He's very cute. And he chugs those beers. he hugs him yeah so how was that chicken motherfucker hell yeah check in on s's video Was it really four times? Steve? The Beetle?

Oh yeah I still can't believe that story Is it suck knowing that you're Beetlejuice now? For the books Yeah I don't want that I don't want that reputation I attract bugs and pests But I got it

What's up Beetlejuice? I thought you got it. Big Cat, you want to read that? Steve, you're cracking up again. You think it's the funniest thing in the world. I've never seen you enjoy anything that much. It was very funny. It was not.

You were actually commenting, like, this is actually so weird because I'm actually not that sweaty right now. And this was in the earlier times. None of it is funny except for the part that you think it's funny. That's the part that's funny right now. And this was in the earlier times. None of it is funny except for the part that you think it's funny. That's the part that's funny. I mean, if you see a bug flying your buddy multiple times, it gets to be funny. Oh, Steven, let's just have this conversation real quick before we end out loud. Dylan, who does a great job repurposing the Yak, putting it on the Yak YouTube, hit me up today. He was like, hey, should I just start putting the show on the podcast feed?

I'm not opposed to it. Should we just do it? We could have just been doing that. We have that thing that you just approved last week. We just got tagged in something, too. I don't remember. The layover? Yeah, go for it. It's exactly one month from today.

One month from today, we're going to do a Yak Live show, an event. Is that okay, Stas? Yeah. We will be dickheads there. Oh my god, if you try to come up to us, we are going to scoff at you. We will be up on stage dancing. Let me just practice.

How the fuck did you even get in here? Who are you? Oh, you thought that was funny? Really? Really? Really? Explain how that's funny. What is that?

Wait, wait, what is that? Is anyone referencing any of our jokes? Are we? Is Brandon going to the show? Yeah. So what, are we going to tell them what the show is? Yes. You're worried about Brandon. I haven't seen brandon over a month i think his whole family died

they're eating my ghosts at the shore got you like that like why is the camera my whole family died but don't tell anyone i want sass to try to shame me and then we're gonna get his ass uh no we're gonna do a live show. We'll announce where it is. I actually don't know. Like, if we packed the place, it'd be bad, right? I don't want people to come. Well, I think people will come. I want people to come.

Why would it be bad? I'm sure there's going to be a roped off area for whatever it is. Well, I don't, because, okay, what I'm saying bad is there's no tickets. And if you say, okay, here's where it is, only a limited amount of people actually get in. A bunch of people will stand in line and be like, that sucked. Wait, why aren't there tickets? So we should maybe figure that out, Steven, like tickets so that we can just – because I'm thinking about it out loud. Like the last thing I want is for a bunch of people to be pumped to come see us.

Then they have to wait in line. They never get in. That sucks. We look like assholes. Well, they could use that kids app they could use the kids app kids app well everyone can just come back to my apartment after yes but steven let's do that before we announce exactly what we're gonna do let's try to talk to the bar and just be like hey like we don't even we don't have sell tickets. They just have to give tickets so that people know, hey, if you want to come out, you have to have a ticket to get in. Otherwise, don't. Take it out of our hands.

We're not the bad guys. Correct. Yep. Correct. That's called CYA. Be friendly to the customers and the people we love. Right. Because it would suck.

That's a really good idea. Tickets. Tickets. We should do a merch table with all of our horrible shirt ideas. Yeah, that's a good idea. And only one of each. One of each. $300 each cash. Yep. Milk them. Milk them.

Someone's getting milked. One of these suckers. Can we get some Beatles at this? My whole family's coming. They'll arrive. They'll be there. I'm not kidding. When the beetle landed on me, every time I was like, oh, that's kind of ew. He was cackling. Did you talk about it on the way home, Stephen?

Yes, he did not stop laughing. This morning, woke up, burst out laughing, and just was like, I can't believe that happened. Just pillow talk with your wife about this beetle. Stephen also said that it was hard to get home because he couldn't pee on the way home. Steven, he pulled on the side of the road and peed on the highway in Connecticut. And he didn't want to do that on the way. Oh, you drove with him? No, but he told me.

You guys were like FaceTiming the whole way home? Did you stay up in Connecticut? I did. Nice hotel. Yes. Damn. You brought someone back? Woke up in an apartment that was not mine.

Bro, how did I get here? Room 402 at the Marriott in Stamford. This is crazy. What the fuck? Last I was a movie. First day back at Barstool Sports. Woke up in an apartment that wasn't mine. Travis for the boys.

Travis is for the boys. All right. Picking out the fit was a struggle. You're going in. His ass is going in. Definitely the tie-dye. Definitely the tie-dye. All right.

That hanger would not cooperate. Like, at all. And I want it. I was rooting for the hanger. I think that's it. It's good to be back. Let's do a two-hour episode today. I ordered that kid and the other intern's pizza

because they were here doing the Barstool Athletes thing. I'm carrying ten boxes of pizza. He's like, where's it from? He's from Alabama. Who asked this? The Yeti kid. The Yeti. He asked where he...

Well, we'll fire him. Send it back. I promise it's going to be the best pizza you've ever had. Send it back. You're going to get a lot of mentions from that? No, dude, they got the sushi place. Dude, Alabama has good-ass pizza. Oh, yeah.

Agent McCarron's sushi place in Tuscaloosa. True. Called Agent. No, I swear to God. What does it call? A.J. McCarron, who won a national title with Alabama, has a sushi place in Tuscaloosa called A-J-I-A-N. That's A-J-I-N.

A-jin. It's pronounced A-jin. Well, it's A-jin without the S. Light bulb, yep. It's pretty good, right? It's pretty good. Like, it was just sitting on a platter for him. It's pretty good, right? Mm-hmm. It's pretty good. Like, it was just sitting on a platter for him. Wait a minute.

My name's H. That's real. That's real shit. Che? What's good? I just thought of something. What if we had a Restaurant called Asperger's Yeah

There's a South Park episode About that There is? Yeah That's the name of it? Yeah Fuck Steal bits much?

I don't watch South Park But I guess Damn Yeah and they put the burgers In their ass And that's the special ingredient Oh I was thinking more

Just like KB just How do they do it? Does the whole entire I don't even like cheeseburgers. It's Asperger's. It's a burger place where KB's the head chef. Yeah. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. I saw the part that did that. Oh. Where KB is the head chef in the episode. One beetle burger. Let's go, please. KB, you did a lot of coke this weekend. I saw you do please. KB, you did a lot of coke this weekend. I saw you do it.

KB. Yeah, you're back? We walked into Penny Farthing, and he went up to a kid, and he was like, give me your coke. And you came back. Yeah, that happened. It did? Yeah. Damn.

Word for word. It didn't happen exactly like that, but. No. Was give me your coke, I'll suck your dick? How did you get all that coke? Did not happen. How much did you have on you? People will believe this. Why wouldn't?

Uh oh, he's getting a little sweaty. Someone get a beetle to dry him off. You were loving that coke this morning. Thanks, Sass. Sass. KBJ Coke swag. Do the Coke thing.

More like key bump. Oh, no. Oh, fuck. You thought it was for Kyle Bauer? Not this weekend. You took a college kid's cocaine. You said you'd follow him on Twitter. Instagram, too. All right. Instagram too alright

dark ending yeah dark ending to the show end us with a joke from your stand up do you want to apologize to any people that struggle to read

no I hate all dyslexic people oh there we go perfect ending perfect we'll clip that too It's your straws, yeah Silentate for a while It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act Thank you.