The Yak - Look At Me, Frank The Tank Is The Captain Now | The Yak 9-30-21

Episode Date: October 1, 2021

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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Oh, it's the Yak. Announcement to make. What's the meme? I'm the captain now. That just happened. From Captain Phillips. Yeah.

If we want to pan out, that just happened. Pan. And there he is. There he is. Francis. Frank is back. Well, he captained it. He Captain Phillipsed it.

But he's going to give it a shot of just going with the flow and being one of the guys. And, you know, we're not going to talk about the Mets. We're going to just have fun. We're going to joke. Alright. Not make Frank think about Frank. It's everyone. Alright. It's like a chocolate football. I feel like this is good. I feel like we're going to

have a great time today. And I want to say something real quick. Bet on the Bengals. Minus seven. I think maybe minus seven and a half as well. You get a lucky Larry shirt. 50 bucks.

That's not what I wanted to say, though. But that is this sweatshirt. Also, Buddha Ben. Shout out Buddha Ben. Nice cap. My man. Big shout out. Shout out.

Shout out. Shout out. Also, shout out Lil Sass. He just keeps catching L's from my hands on the internet street. It is rough. And you know that deep down that actually... You get violent at night, too. It hurts him.

And I just go to sleep just being like, whatever. I'm sure when I wake up, this ratio will be even worse for him. It's like 10, 30, or 11. You just decided to lash out? I'm going to call it true. So I'm not going to... Listen, I know I'm powerful. And I kind of know the internet better than Sass.

I'm a mean lord. I'm one of those edgy youths. What did they tell you about on Fox News and MSNBC? These youths are bullying people online. I'm going to put down my gun. Sass, you're safe. I will not race you anymore. This is my truce.

Congratulations. I kind of got the itch, though. Okay, you should do it. I will retweet it every time you do it. How about the person we ratioed yesterday? Their next tweet was them coming out of the closet. Yep. What?

Yeah. And I'm going to ratio that one, too, today. Yeah. All right. So what I wanted to say, though, is the people at home who are listening, Frank the Tank is back. There's going to be a trial run. Everyone positive.

No negative, all positive. Because I miss Frank. Things got crazy towards the end of the Mets season. I miss this guy. I want him back in my life, and I want everyone to have a positive outlook. Frank, you think that's fair? I think it's fair. All right.

What's up with you, Frank? Frank, you're harrowingly apathetic right now. No, I like you. Frank is... I don't mind. Frank is a go... If you talk to Frank, he's a go-with-the-flow guy. He can be.

Coachable. Yep. You know, I got good news for everyone. It's bettingable. Yep. You know, I got good news for everyone. It's betting tonight. Okay. On the Thursday night game. I got the Jaguars and the points. There we go.

So that's good. That's a good. That's a friendship thing that Frank just did trying to get people the Lucky Larry shirt. Love it. Also, Frank, shout out Frank because he did kill Larry before Larry died when he tweeted RIP Larry like three weeks before, and then he died. So you might be, what is it? A harbinger?

A harbinger? Well, somebody sent me a text saying that, did you see the Larry Memorial? Frank, you know in the world of journalism, you always need two sources. It was for Larry Nassar. Oh. It was a memorial. How'd you say that name? Nassar? two sources. It was for Larry Nassar. Oh. It was a memorial. How'd you say that name? Nassar?

Is that how you say it? Nassar? That sounds like a mass hole saying NASA. Nassar. Nassar? Yeah, why do they do that? Why do they just end words with R for no reason? I think there's a whole thing about it.

When Donnie says the word saw, it's saw. It's like four syllables. I don't even know how. What is that? How did that even get to that point? Regional accents are great. That's not even like a regional thing. It's just a different phoneme.

Not all accents get you late. Oh, yeah. Not all accents get you late. But I'm convinced that if you go like, all right, so if you're an English dude coming to America, American dude going to England maybe Southern dude going north East going west I think it gets you late I think it gets you late There are some accents that just don't fly But I think girls are attracted to things

They're like whoa this is foreign What? Nothing Oh what are you talking about? No I just thought that some accents don't fly was really funny It's clever You're doing the thing where Nick Is such a great wordsmith What are you talking about? No, I just thought that some accidents don't fly was really funny. It's clever. It wasn't trying to be. You're doing the thing where Nick is such a great wordsmith that he gets credit for jokes he didn't even make.

That happens every once in a while. Profiling at the airport, I thought that was... I don't think that's what he was saying. If I could send a shout out to Buddha Ben as well. He sent me an awesome care package. Got the hoodie, got the hat. He DM'd me and asked for my hoodie size. That's right.

Nick, what is that like being in that zone where people will like, even when you say something and it's not a joke and people are like, oh, I get it. That was a joke. It's taken a toll on my day-to-day life. Yeah? Yeah. No, it's definitely beneficial.

Oh, for sure. It's the best. If my name didn't rhyme with click, I have been fired years ago it's true uh who'd have been also sent me this was like three months ago he sent me uh an nft of the um brandon like going to school or something one of his brandon paintings don't brandon don't brandon yeah that's actually smart well yeah but no it's in I Have It, and I don't know how to do anything with it. I signed up for all these things.

That's smart Brandon. That's the idealized version of Brandon. I bought a print of it. Oh, really? Well, I want to sell it for money. I want people to... No, no, no, no, no. You got to hold that. Hold?

Yeah. A Brandon painting is not going to add value. No. No, well, yeah. It will add value to yourself. It will. Brandon in school, that is the most valuable thing possible. Yeah, well, yeah. You add value to yourself, it will. Brandon in school, that is the most

valuable thing possible. Yeah, you could sell that one day and say, Tommy, to trade school. Those two things have never been seen together.

Well, I have it. I signed up for whatever, some weird, crazy NFT websites and it's somewhere. I don't know the passwords or anything, but I got it.

You're part of the gold rush? If anybody wants to buy it, they can have it. We should buy an ape. Oh, those are expensive. Meta something. I don't know the passwords or anything, but I got it. Are you part of the gold rush? If anybody wants to buy it, they can have it. We should buy an ape. Oh, those are expensive. Meta something. I know. Some dude stopped me on the street

and was like, bro, I'm a huge fan. I'm just going to say it right away. I'm rich and I bought an ape. You should buy one. I was like, what? He cut right to the chase. Yeah.

He's like, I just bought one, made so much money. I have money, so it's not a big deal. I was like, what? I bought an ape. Yeah. Let's cut to the chase. Yeah. He's like, I just bought one, made so much money. Like, I have money, so it's not a big deal. I was like, what? I bought an ape. Yeah. Let's cut to the chase.

I bought an ape. Yeah. But he, like, the way he said it, he was like, listen, I'm rich. I was like, I didn't ask. Yeah, God damn. Walking on the street. I know you wanted to know. I'm rich.

So I bought an ape. And now I'm richer. So we're just like a gorilla? Kind of. We got a gorilla for sale. How did Harambe's death affect you, Frank, personally? It was a deep, dark day. Yeah, I agree.

I agree. I agree. Still, the Francesa clip is still an all-time clip. I won't go to Cincinnati because of it. Well, no, because they've rebounded with Fiona, right? Yeah, but she's a cheap knockoff. Oh, it's a hippo. You can't knock off an ape with a hippo. It's a famous animal.

Frank, what was your Twitter game like before you went viral and got hired by Barstool? Can we search Frank's Twitter? Search Harambe? Were you using it? I don't remember what I was thinking about Harambe. Did you tweet about Harambe? I don't remember, actually.

Frank has been consistently Frank for his entire life. Since the day he was born. That's the beauty of Frank. If Frank weren't here, he'd still be doing the one... What was the paper bet? You had to eat the paper. Yes. You did that with no one.

Right. He made a paper bet? Yeah, tell us the story. That the Team USA would not make the World Cup, qualify for the World Cup. And then they, wait, so this is when they did qualify? Yes. And you had to eat paper and you ate it for like, it was like maybe five people watching on YouTube. I ate my words.

That's a man of his, that's a man of his word. Did you salt it? Did you sauce it? How'd you eat the paper? Just straight? Gravy. Just raw dog. I raw dog it. You raw dog the paper? I guess this is the gorilla of my dreams. Oh! Harambe's back. What? Show him who's boss,

Frank. Get in. Get in. Quality there. I guess this is the gorilla of my dreams. That's 2020. I love it. Yeah gorilla of my team. That's 2020. I love it. Yeah, that was 2020.

Oh, yeah. My God. Hey, wait a second. That's at the Excess Safari Mini Golf. They have, like, different themed holes. Oh, yeah. There's a crew. There's a gorilla hole. What town's that in?

I like that. Oh, it's out by the zoo. Turtle back. It actually is right next to the zoo. Yeah, that's where the zoo crew goes. Yeah. I like that, that they're, like, next to the zoo, and they have, like, a zoo putt-putt.

They're just getting some runoff. Yeah, runoff. People who get locked out of the zoo, they're like, well, come see this fake gorilla. We can still go here. Every kid's like, can we do this now, too? Yeah. It's too late.

Who wins in a Putt-Putt? You versus Stephen Che? Because Stephen Che, I don't know if you knew this, but he actually has a trophy. Award winner. Yeah. He'll probably win, but I think I could hold my own. You could definitely hold your own.

Would you compete against nine-year-olds? Sure. All right, so yeah, that's – Steven? I mean – I was going to give you some moral high ground there. I mean, I'm looking forward to trying to do more putt-putt. We need to get some camera crews out there, me and Dougs and whoever,

and just play some putt-putt. You know, there's a Pixar thing, putt-putt. Yeah. Pixar. It's very tiny. Everything about it is miniature. So it's miniature, miniature golf? Yeah.

It's for tots. But you should go. Frank, is Myrtle Beach the capital of the mini golf world? I was just about to suggest get down to Myrtle. Yeah. Yeah, that could be the capital of the mini golf world. Never been to Myrtle Beach. I've seen some good ones called Smuggler's Cove.

There's a Smuggler's Cove like in Tampa, and there's like a similar themed one in Seaside Heights. Very nice. The Myrtle Beach is go-karts and mini-golf. They do it. And waffle houses. And trash people. Myrtle Beach is one of those

places you just drive and everything's kind of a strip mall, but not. For 18 years, I thought that was paradise on Earth. Myrtle Beach? That was the dream vacation for the families in my town. In the South, Destin is our Myrtle Beach? That was the dream vacation for the families in my town. In the south, Destin is our Myrtle Beach. We go to Destin. About Orange Beach.

It's becoming Orange Beach. But who wants to go to a vacation in Alabama? You want to at least cross the border and say you're in Florida. I was surprised to learn that the Basketball Hall of Fame is in the Strip Mall. That was odd. I saw your picture.

I had no idea. What was in between? There's a Cold Stone Creamery. No, it's in Penn State. There's a hamburger place. There's a bank. Okay. So it's like you're at the Hall of Fame,

and you've got these, like, it struck me as odd. It's very weird that, oh, wow, that is it. It's like you got the Hall of Fame and you got these like – it struck me as odd. It's very weird that – oh, wow. That is it. It's like a children's arcade. It really is next to a Cold Stone Creamy. That's the Hall of Fame. That's pretty horrible. It's so weird.

Now, to be fair, that's the back of the Hall of Fame. Okay. That's the back. But why is it that baseball and football have like hollowed grounds that are cool to visit. Basketball and hockey. I walked by the Hockey Hall of Fame in Toronto. I was like, wait, what's going on here? I haven't been there yet.

That's the only one I haven't been to. Have you been to the college football? How's the baseball? The pros. I haven't been to college football. Baseball. College football Hall of Fame kind of stinks. Yeah, it's in Atlanta.

There's nothing to it. You're walking down the street and then boom. It's just a wall of helmets. It's like next to a hotel. Well, the NBA, the Basketball Hall of Fame is even worse. They took down the pictures of all the Hall of Famers. And now they have the names on a wall. And very disappointing.

Like the Vietnam Memorial? Basically. And they have a computer terminal where you can look up information about all the Hall of Famers. Everything's online these days. There's no plaques. That's so stupid. Or you could just use a computer anywhere. Right.

You don't have to go there. And, of course, they have the memorabilia around the building. But they should evict the Cold Store Creamery. Wow, that's a lot. Well, you could go to Cold Store Creamery anyway. In fact, this building is only 20 years old. They've only built this new Hall of Fame like 2002. Oh, wow.

The previous Hall of Fame was turned into an LA Fitness, and it's like on the other side of the parking lot. So, Frank, I want to go to Cooperstown. Is it worth the money? Oh, yes. That's cool. Oh, yes. Because it's also like a town that, like, Canton's kind of like that, where it's, I want to go to Cooperstown. Is it worth the money? Oh yes. That's cool. Oh yes. Because it's also like a town that, like Canton's kind of like

that where it's, I don't know, it's built around it. It's a big thing, yeah. What is that? This is Cooperstown. TJ's fast with it. I've been to the Hall of Fame on Hall of Fame weekend when Mike Piazza was inducted. And it's just incredible the Hall of Fame weekend. Now, I don't recommend

going to see the Hall of Fame on Hall of Fame weekend because it's like wall-to-wall weekend now i don't recommend going to see the hall of fame on hall of fame weekend because it's it's like wall-to-wall people you can't move around in there so i'd recommend going on a different date but going there for hall of fame weekend is they have a parade of all the hall of famers that are that show up that day that parade down main street the day night before the uh induction and it's just incredible. It's just, it really is like a baseball town. Remember when Mike Piazza had to do a press conference saying he wasn't gay?

What? No. No way. That happened, right? Yeah, but I think Buster Olney might have been behind that too. We can't play that clip, can we? Why? Why did he get to that point? I don't remember why.

His hair is curly. There was a New York Post article that implied that he was gay. I was at a gay bar last night. How was it? It was good. Describe it in one word. Gay? Yeah, probably.

All right. That's like one of the Reddit commenters to have that one. Skip Bayless, in his book about the Cowboys, just said Troy Aikman was gay. He was all about Troy Aikman being gay. Just wildly, he just, hey, yeah, that guy's gay. Nothing, no proof. Also, it's not a bad thing, but it's very bizarre

thinking about 20 years ago, sports media. And 30 years ago for Aikman, like 1991, early 90s, and then you're in Texas. Like, it was wild for Troy Aikman to deal with back then, and Skip Bayless just an idiot, and it's failed upwards ever since. Do you find it? By the way, are they? The Piazza one?

Yeah. That's what we're working on. Okay. Are they coming out with a new? Yeah, I'm not kidding. Yeah, no, that happened. Now I do remember. Yeah, it was crazy. They should have –

Imagine that happening today. Like, that's the front page of the sports section. Well, that's why it's always been in your compost. What? Can we say it again? It's not in quotes, so it was like that's the graphic designer that was letting people know. What's the date up there? September 2002 or May – May 22, 2002. I just want to know when it was like that's the graphic designer that was letting people know. What's the date up there? September 2002?

Or May 22nd, 2002. I just want to know when it was. Yeah. Not that long ago. I'm not gay. I thought it said like late 2001 at first. I was like, didn't they have bigger fish to fry in late 2001 than my fiance being gay? No, no, no.

That was our country's return to normal. Yeah, that was healing. It was a final act of healing. Say that Mike Piazza's gay and have him have to do a press conference. You know, if he was... The terrorist didn't win. We're back to accusing our sports stars of being

gay. If he was more media savvy, he should have said, not that there's anything wrong with it. Yeah. In parentheses. Yeah. Roy Hibbert. Yeah.

Yeah, wild times. I don't know why that popped in my head. Maybe it's the Mets jersey. Are you going to the game today? I don't want to talk about the Mets, but are you going to the game? I am going to the game. Okay. You dress in uniform when you're going to the game.

Do you remember when we did the Frank the Tank Challenge? We had the voting on. Yeah. Yes. 49 and a half? That was great. Oh, no. Oh, you're going with the guy.

Oh, with the guy. He's tagging along. Yes. He bought the tickets, right? Yes. Who is it? So his prize was. Joe is very lit.

Joe is very lit is his name. On Twitter. Yeah, on Twitter. Joe is very lit. I love it. So he won the contest and what did he win? A chance to take me to a Mets game. Oh, your dog.

And did he really buy your ticket, too? Yeah. It had to be cheap. No. I'll see what it is. Are you going to buy him a hot dog and a drink? I'll get him anything he wants. Okay.

Take him some barstool gear, maybe a gift card. Wait, anything? Well, I need to get to the stadium. Are you... Concessions-wise. Are you going to have to come out and say, press conference here?

Can we fetish up Frank on top of the post? That was so silly and so ridiculous. So ridiculous. If I was gay, I'd be gay all the way. Oh, okay.

That's a perfect quote. That is a great quote. What a wild, like, insane story. Oh, okay. That's a perfect quote. That is a great quote. What a wild, like, insane story. Oh, man. Was there any video of it? I don't know.

I think you should highlight that whole quote. I love that. If I was gay, I'd suck everyone's dick. He was implying that? Let me ask you a question. Have I sucked your dick? No? All right.

Can't be gay then. There we go. If I were gay, you'd know because I'd be wrapped around your cock right now. Oh, trust me. You'd know. Well, the only thing Mike Piazza is doing these days is destroying Italian soccer teams. He is. Is he? He is.

He owns an Italian soccer team. I think there's been some weird controversies. Well, we are really plugged into Piazza today. What is Jesse Ventura up to? You want to know how plugged in we are to Mike Piazza? I think he's still doing conspiracy shows. Oh, look at that. He's wearing the Hall of Fame shirt.

We've gone full circle. Hey, KB, I have a question for you. Yep. Six state capitals west of L.A. Wow. Six state capitals west of la six state capitals west of la so um honolulu uh olympia yeah salem yeah carson city yeah boise no no kyle sacramento yeah you skipped the easiest one the easiest one um No. No. Kyle. Dumb fuck. Sacramento. Yeah. You skipped the easiest one. Skipped the easiest one.

Damn. Sober Kyle. This is tough. What did I say? Michael Cera. This man. This man. This man is falling apart. Alaska.

Juneau. Okay. That's a fun fact, though. I did not know Carson City was west of LA. Yes. Okay. That's a fun fact, though. I did not know Carson City was west of LA. Yes. Yes. That's one of those map things that kind of fucks you up where you're like, what is it? Detroit is east of Atlanta.

Yeah, that is. I think that's true, right? Yeah. That's not true. That's the gold standard of crazy facts. Yeah, you can pull up a map. Yeah. Detroit is east of Atlanta.

By how much? Not by a ton but it is it's a fact show Detroit there's Atlanta boom isn't that crazy yeah

that fucks me up go to California I can find the six state capitals west of LA yeah but yeah Carson City

yeah cause LA touched all the way in there it's fucking crazy man it's why maps just blow your mind we'll do it look at all that green it looks so pleasant Brian Laundrie's probably up there dog's gonna find his ass dog isn't dog on island right now I've I just want to say I've reached out to dog and told him I'm willing to help anyway he needs my help thank you Both on Instagram and Twitter. Hopefully he didn't respond because he's busy. Well, yeah, I know, but I just wanted to let him know that I'm part

of the team. If he needs me to do anything, I'm there. What if he said, come out? I'd be there in a second. Come out and help me chase him. What do you mean? That's like, hey, Big Cat, what if someone said all your wildest dreams could come true? All you have to do is just go.

Yeah. By the way, you know my parents actually live by that kill zone. What's the kill zone? Oh, the... Is that what we're calling where Gabby Petito? The kill zone. Well, whatever they call it. That no law zone, that little stretch of land that's like at the edge of Idaho and Wyoming.

There's a no law zone? Yeah, I didn't hear uh idaho and wyoming there's a no laws yeah i don't i didn't hear that what yes search this uh find this i don't think this is right no law it's it's it's it's internet thing which yeah there's like confusion over whose jurisdiction it is i think that your parents are telling you this so they can get away with crimes this is like don't go back there right Right. No, you need to stay here. This seems like they're setting you up. Zone of death. What?

Where you can get away with murder. What? We got to go do a show here. Don't believe that. Yeah, we'll do a live show there. With loaded handguns. And my parents actually live like about 50 miles from there. What? Holy crap.

No way. Wait. The scenario is fiction. It's a fictional place. But all... No, wait, this is not real. Potentially. It says quite possibly.

Let's imagine... They're giving a hypothetical. It's like there's confusion over whose jurisdiction it is. Where you would do the trial or where you would get arrested, right? Who runs that place? That's what the confusion is? Yeah, the confusion is. Because it's like the western edge of Yellowstone National Park, which actually leads into part of Idaho and Wyoming.

Look at this, Frank. Good addition to the show. Actually, Idaho and Montana, I should say. And it bleeds into that area. And my parents actually live in that region. That's where my parents live. When I say that they live in Idaho, that's the region of Idaho they live in. Trials in the district are normally held.

So you can't actually kill anyone? No. It's more that it will be... Actually, it's kind of similar to what's happening to you right now in your trial. It just keeps getting pushed off and we don't know really who's in charge. We don't know who's in charge and what what the what the actual prosecution is i am going to make a we've somehow given it to roan well it's roan i'm frank's lawyer i'm going to make a powerpoint when i say i'm going to make a powerpoint

billy football is going to make me a powerpoint and we're going to prosecute no we're going to defend frank against the prosecution, which is Roan, and then the judge is Owen. That's right. But yeah, this area, it's like this zone of death. It's crazy. It's kind of dumb if you think about it, but supposedly that's where the killing happened with Brian Laundrie. I thought that happened. I thought it was in Utah. I think Wyoming. Yeah, that's where the killing happened with Brian Laundrie. I thought that happened...

I thought it was in Utah. I think Wyoming. Yeah, that's where it is, in the Teton Valley. And that's just right around the Teton Valley is in that area. Grand Teton means big breasts. Does it? Yeah. Really?

That's what the mountains look like. You know, I could see the Teton Mountains. Ha-ha! Yeah, brother. You know the I could see the Teton Mountains I could see the Teton Mountains Just by On a clear day by looking out my parents Living room window And they live in Belleville, New Jersey? No they live in

Just outside of Rexburg, Idaho That would have been incredible The name of their town is weird Is it some sort of farm?. But the name of their town is weird. It's like some – was it some sort of farm or – what's the name of their town? Well, they actually live in a farm community called Chester, Idaho. Okay. Chester. Do you know where Preston, Idaho is?

That's a little south. Okay. It's Napoleon Dynamite. Yes. The town where the grandmother broke her cock. The cock ex, the dunes. Yeah, that's about. They never showed that place.

That's about. Oh, they did. They did. Yeah. That's actually about five minutes, about five miles from where my parents live. Wow. You ever been to the dunes? No, I've never been to the dunes.

Broke her cock ex. But yeah, that's. Yeah. My parents actually live by the dunes. How rural is it? That's actually. How far to the food store? The little town that's nearest to them is called St. Anthony.

I could see your family being in the Napoleon Dynamite universe. Yes. Like, very... Right down there. Fitted seamlessly. Yes. Napoleon Dynamite's... That's you.

Napoleon Dynamite's brother. Kip. Yeah. Kip, yup. He reminds me of my uncle. Kip. Yeah. Kip, yep. He reminds me of my uncle. Got it. Why is that? Just his whole mannerism.

Interesting. We should remake it with Frank's family. My late step-grandmother reminds me of Napoleon's grandmother. Okay. She is also Charlie's mom in Always Sunny. Oh, and what was her name? Tina Majorino.

Tina? The llama? Yeah. The girl who made all the crafts. Oh, Deb. Yeah, Deb. What about her?

Who's Napoleon? You guys really know the fuck out of Napoleon. What's going on here? Who's Napoleon, Frank? Who's Deb? Curiously, that's kind of how my mother acted when I was younger. I had a thing for her.

You had a thing for Deb? Frank's mom? Yeah, Deb. But, yeah, so this is how people... That movie is almost like a documentary of how Idaho is. I just don't believe that. No, no, that movie just nails how Idaho is. It's just the whole atmosphere of Idaho.

I wish you guys had a show where you could rediscover it. Yeah. You guys should go to Frank's house. We should. We actually should. When is Rediscovering America coming back? Next year.

I don't think it's been stated. Now, it would probably be best to wait to spring or maybe do it if you can't do it now because winters in that part of the region are brutal. I went there for Christmas one day and I was

out there. What day? This was about five years ago, but around Christmas. Yeah. And I was out there for December 25th, 2016. For ten days. And I was out there for 10 days. It snowed seven out of 10 days. And the days it didn't snow, it was below zero. And the snow was so high, a five-foot fence was buried. And they moved there from New Jersey?

Yes, and my father hates it. Oh, he just hates it. He just tolerated it? How many years has he hated it? All of them. What took him out to Idaho from New Jersey? My mother's side of the family is from out there. Got it.

And now... He's just stuck. He's a Judge Judy. It's kind of funny that... Yeah, and he just sits and watches Judge Judy all day. They called me last night. They lost their internet. So they're going to be without the internet for a while.

And my father's pissed off about that. Just pissed off. He's genuinely just pissed off waking up in the morning. There's the apple. There's the apple. You're so different. Do they watch your stuff? Compared to me, I'm optimistic and cheery.

Is he louder? Oh, my God. Give me an impression'm optimistic and cheery. Is he louder? Oh, my God. Give me an impression of his outbursts. Oh, he just hates everybody. What does he hate the most? Like you hate the Mets and – what does he hate? Idaho. He just hates the state.

Yes. What about it? The weather, the – The weather, the people, the Mormons. Yeah, the Mormons. Where he watches the news and they come on the news and they just keep talking about Driggs, Idaho. He hates Driggs, Idaho for some reason. What's in Driggs?

Nothing. Driggs is hard to hate. Yeah. But you know what? If you ask me for my opinion, I'd say hate. If I had to choose. Big head, is PFT really taking off? Meanwhile, before moving out to Idaho, my mother had stopped smoking for five years.

Now she's smoking three packs a day. Three packs a day? There's 1,100 people in Driggs, Idaho. How could you hate a town that tiny? You hate them all. What's going on there? Read how many people are in St. Anthony. It's also a border town. Fuck them. Read how many people are in St. Anthony. It's also a border town.

Fuck them. Read how many people are in St. Anthony, Idaho. Yes, Owen. PFT is going to take off his glasses if we get the... So I think we're going to do...

We're going to try to keep... It's an internet experiment. Can we keep the number of subscribers static for 30 seconds? I don't know if we can. Like last time... i don't think you will people started fucking with us and started unsubscribing we lost like 2 000 people on stream

oh yeah yeah so but yes he is i i think he's not gonna take off his glasses like permanently it's gonna be more that just a bonus when someone gets video of him in the background he's not gonna don't worry about it like that'll be a weight off his shoulders. Yeah, when he wants to watch on stream. He's got to be taking a toll on his actual eyeballs. Yes, correct. Is there like a medical effect of wearing glasses? I know the guy from Trailer Park Boys, his eyes were 20-20,

and then he was wearing those magnified ones, and now he actually wears glasses. Well, remember when we went out to Stoos? I accidentally caught him on camera. Yeah, that's right. You did. You were getting the smoke off the pizza. The pizza was barely in the picture. It was taking a picture of

the Pirelli's and Steve's and it was just like a straight shot at PFT's face. You did feel bad, Frank. I appreciate that. But yeah, it should be a fun stream tonight um i have a question what is going on in steven shay's life right now where is he the dominican republic he's in the doctor's appointment but here are his others today his others are very weird uh former female staffer said trump called her from air

force wanted to defend the size of his penis. Politics aside, I love that he had to add that. Have you ever had to defend the size of your penis? And then he's got, do you keep a weapon like a baseball bat or something like that under your bed in case of a break-in? What do you mean defend the size of your penis?

If you've seen my penis, I can't... No, it's bigger than it is. It's hard to make a counter argument after it's been seen. No, I swear it's bigger than it is. No. All right, so here's a defense of my penis. Sure. Oh, God.

It could be smaller. It could be. Could be smaller. It has been smaller. When you play sports and stuff, you get sports dick. Or when you're a baby. Yeah, or when you're a baby. Although maybe I have a Benjamin Button penis.

My penis is Benjamin Button-ing. It was enormous. What other defenses could I use? My balls are adequately in proportion. Mine are spaced real wide. Really? Well, my left hand's lower. I'm trying to think,

what other defense? I think the best defense of an older dick is saying... The what? What? In the bathtub, that's when my penis is the smallest. And funniest.

It's probably the vantage point. What about the ice bath at that bathhouse we went to? Jesus. I didn't know. What were you going to say, Brandon? Well, the best defense of an older penis is,

I've already used it, I'm done with it. I've got the kids. I've got kids. My dick doesn't have anything else left to prove. My dick's retired. You said a dick solely for reproduction. My dick's retired.

I don't know. It's like Philip Rivers now. His dick's retired. Is it? I hope so. I don't think so. I mean, what's the Super Bowl of dicks? When can you go out on top?

I don't think a dick can retire. go out on top? I don't know. Having twins or something? I don't know. Triplets? In defense of my penis. Short story. Short and small. You're right.

This other is out there today. Yeah, I don't know. Is he going to get attacked? He's worried. Now, I have a question. When he was making these defenses of his penis, was he actually playing Memory from Cats on there or something? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Big ass dick. Do you guys keep something next to your bed? I think that's common. Oh, yeah. Kind of common for a guy to have a baseball bat by his bed. I don't. You have your own strength. I do.

I'm getting stronger, too. You see the new security guard? I think you take this one. Yeah, you can take it. Should I? Yeah. Test him. Just give him a little thought.

Apparently they talk, and he was like, yeah, I heard about him. That was the one yesterday. He was like, yeah. Oh, you mean they talk within each other? Yeah. Not just that they talk, that that's a big deal. They talk within each other. Damn. Not just that they talk. That that's a big deal. They talk within each other. Damn.

I like them a lot. I do, too. They're all great guys. Going on the road, I would highly recommend if you are ever in a spot with them. It's a big time. It feels good to know that someone's got your back. We walk to the game. All these guys go, too.

Yeah. No, we walk to Soldier Field on Saturday. He's got piercing blue eyes. He's like a Daniel Craig. Oh! We need to get him in here.

Go test him. He's not responding in a way that's conveying he knows. He knows. He knows what's going on. I don't think he does. I can't tell. I think he knows. He's like he's halfway there.

You're scared to test him. Baby blue. His eyes are in color. I am scared to test him. Very scared to test him. I'm not testing him. Do you think he doesn't know any moves? He just looks at someone and they stop.

They're frozen. Oh, my God. Those eyes. But, yeah at someone and they stop. They're frozen. Oh, my God, those eyes. But, yeah, the guys are great. We walked Soldier Field with them. We don't really need them for anything, but it's just nice to know they're there. Just in case. There's some nuts out there.

Could have used them in Ann Arbor, getting to the car there. Yeah, that was bad. That was the wildest thing I've seen in a while. Drunk college kids, and this is not a knock on them because i was drunk college kids basically anything they do i'm like all right they're drunk college kids but uh yeah it's hard to move through the crowd yeah who on the yak would be the best at archery who would be the that was a mail-in the topic by steven shay yeah who would be the best i don't fucking know if you had unlimited money what would be the worst? That was a mail-in. The copy by Stephen Shea. Yeah. Who would be the best?

I don't fucking know. If you had unlimited money, what would be one thing you would need to have in a dream house of yours? A Chili's. A bed. I've always wanted a full-court basketball court in my basement.

Yes. I love that. Yes. I agree with him. Who is the GOAT of cribs? Not an outdoor one. An indoor full-court basketball. Full-court indoor.

No way full-court indoor. He knows. That's how he knows. Oh, fuck. Not an outdoor one An indoor Full court basketball Full court indoor No full court indoor He knows He knows That's how he knows Oh fuck KB go do something about it I am terrified of him Alright so stop

Stop showing him No stop showing him I keep looking at him too He knows Oh god Kyle don't look I think he's looking at you He's looking

A basketball court is a great answer. I would love, love, love to just get jumpers up all day. Would you guys like to have two, or maybe just one, a bowling alley lane? Yeah. That would be fun. That would be awesome. What do you think about my Chili's? What if you had a restaurant inside your house?

That would be awesome. I just don't know if that's real. I get tired of it. I think it is realistic. It is realistic. It's all frozen stuff. Does he have the waitstaffs living there too? No, he has one or two people.

He has a... A personal Chili's. Does he have a Chili's manager, an assistant manager? It has to be staffed at all times. What if he wakes up at 2 a.m.? Chili's isn't open. So you can't eat Chili's in your house at 2 a.m. I don't think you understand the amount of money Big Cat has.

You're thinking a year ago. Or maybe a frozen yogurt bar. That would be cool. That's a big You're thinking of Europe. Or maybe a frozen yogurt bar. That would be cool. Yeah, that's just something. That's a big step

down from Chili's. I went to Chili's recently and I had a baby back ribs. Baby back, baby back. I don't want that baby back.

I was actually quite a little disappointed. No. It wasn't as good as I expected. Chili's is delicious. Do not say anything about it.

Well, maybe it was because I was in Charleston West Virginia West Virginia Yeah that's probably Oh yeah That's the reason

Yeah I mean The best Chili's in the world Is in Oklahoma City That's where we went And our waitress Named Raven Offered us mushrooms

Not like On our entree What do you mean? People love Offering mushrooms Drugs They offered you drugs Yeah It was me Caleb Gaz on our entree. What do you mean? People love offering mushrooms. They offered you drugs.

It was me, Caleb, Gaz, and Hank. Did you think about it? Did you talk about mushrooms, or did she just peg you guys? No, she just knew that we were party guys. Caleb has that. Gone. Yeah, he's going to Miami, huh? He's just gone from day to day now?

I did hear on that Dave Portnoy show, he's like, Dan and Kevin can go anywhere they want. That was a pretty nice tidbit. Yeah. I mean, I kind of figured that, but. Uh-oh. We should head out. Yeah, here come the conspiracy theories. I mean, I am going to move back to Chicago at least soon-ish.

Oh, yeah. Well, I mean, my son. Me too, then. He's going to go to school. Yeah, you're welcome. Anyone's welcome. I think I'm going to move back to Chicago At least soonish Well I mean my son He's going to go to school Yeah you're welcome Frank you're You're invited I just did it Frank Would you live in Chicago

I don't think you could leave the Big Apple I'd like to go visit it You know what we would have in the office in Chicago We would get a indoor basketball court. Uh-oh. Yes. What would be in your dream? A new Chicago office.

A new Chicago office is awesome. I'm saying we'd make an even newer, bigger one, and we would get a full basketball court. Speaking of the new Chicago office, they just have a girl now. They have a girl? It's those four guys. No, the Barstool Outdoors girl.

Are you trying to fuck her? No, I'm not, but one of them will. Oh, is she working for one of them? Come on, relax. It's those four guys. Relax. She's a co-worker. You think White Sox Dave is going to be happy?

Stop. He won't, but he will try. Why not the other way around? Why not Sidney's going to fuck one of them? She might. She wants to. Good for her. Good luck.

I see what's wrong with that. I love White Sox, Dave. He's my favorite person. He's the best. Ugly dog. He might be the funniest person. Ugly dog. No.

Oh, yeah. White Sox Dave is the funniest. Look how long his arm is. We were at a... What the fuck is that? Wingspan. Jesus. It's bigger.

Is he not usually shaved? No, usually... His beard is... No, Is he not usually shaved? No, usually... His beard is... No, he's not usually shaved. Sometimes his beard gets in his eye. Yeah. Scratches it. Scratches his cornea.

He kidnapped me on Sunday, which I was happy. He kidnapped me. I was happy to be kidnapped by White Sox Dave, but we had breakfast together. And his dad called him and was like... His dad was asking White Sox Dave what his... His dad was saying, what is my Apple ID? And Dave was just like, I don't fucking know, Dad. Like screaming in this breakfast place. And it was just like, I love you, White Sox Dave.

You're the best. What's the timeline with the Chicago guys? Like how long have you known them? Very long time. All of them, actually, all of them for, like, almost a decade now. Yeah. Holy shit. I think I like them more than anybody in this office.

Yeah. Yeah. It's a good time. Very long time. Maybe. I helped Eddie get a job at Stadium is where he worked before that. Which, what? The company called Stadium?

Yeah. They had live rights for something. I can't remember. Like some weird basketball games and stuff. Now, what's going to happen with Soldier Field? I hear that the players are moving closer to moving to Arlington. Yeah, Arlington. They should. And that the mayor wants to prevent them from using the name Chicago if they move.

Yeah, which is, she's an idiot. that the mayor wants to prevent them from using the name Chicago if they move. Yeah. She's an idiot. I mean, it might be the dumbest thing a single politician has done. Well, she's very dumb. Eliminate Chicago from the name Chicago Bears? Yes. Yeah, she's not the smartest. So what is wrong with them?

Tim Dillon actually did a whole thing where he found her old Yelp reviews, which was very, very funny. How did he find them? Yes. I don't know. Someone sent them to him, and it was like she complained about some limo service, and then the limo service was like, actually, this is factually just completely made up. What are you going to say?

What is wrong with Soldier Field? It is the smallest. It seemed fine when I was there. So it's the smallest stadium in the NFL, and the Bears don't own it. What's it say? About 60? 66. But the Bears don't own it. What's it say? About 60? 66. But the Bears don't own it.

It's probably a decent amount bigger. So. Yeah. The Cardinals. The Jags. So if we want to really get into it, the, I mean, it should be, it should have been, they did a renovation 20 years ago. It should have had a retractable roof so you could get a final four.

Should have been a total rebuild. Yeah. So you get a final four. So you could get the Big Ten championship game and football and basketball, all these things. The biggest thing, though, is that the Bears are a mom-and-pop ownership. Obviously, they're from, like, you know what I mean? They've been owned by the same family the entire time.

Virginia McCaskey, the owner, is older. I think she's like 100. When she passes, there's a belief that all of the grandkids and great grandkids are going to want to sell the team so they can get their money and cash out yeah no one's going to buy the team if they don't own the stadium so it might not be this ownership that builds the stadium but it's a nice carrot for someone to buy the team because no one's going to buy a team and be like, oh, I don't own the stadium. I don't get to throw concerts there.

It's a top three market. It should be a huge stadium. Right. It should be an enormous state-of-the-art stadium. I don't care if there's a roof. Keep it open for Bears games. That's fine. But you should be able to have all of these. The Final Four should be there. How do the Bears not own their own stadium? Back in the 20s, why didn't

they build their own stadium in the 20s? That's why they maintain the field. Which is why it's always a mess. El Paso would do them so much more justice. Let's have the Bears move to El Paso. Let's get a team in El Paso. Virginia Beach and Louisville. It would be great. So many teams don't actually

play in their city anymore. That part's stupid. It's about the metro area you're in. Right. But it's also... The Cowboys play in what? Arlington? Arlington.

Buffalo plays in Orchard Park. The Giants and Jets don't play in New York. Yeah. We got the Niners now playing Santa Clara. They play a long way. That's a long way. The Rams and Chargers play in Inglewood. Yep.

Mm-hmm. I mean... Yeah, fuck out of here. That might be the most pettiest, dumbest thing. It's just stupid. It's like... But it would be great if they... I mean, a new state-of-the-art stadium where you can have all these events would be awesome. Because they would, like...

Chicago has the ability to host a Super Bowl every 10 years. You know what I mean? I know, obviously, cold weather would suck. They ruined Soldier Field when they renovated it. When they got rid of the columns. Well, the columns are still there. It looks like

a spaceship. But when they were over the field they had an awesome look to it. And it's unfortunate that it's not suitable for the NFL. It would be great if Northwestern played there. It was a great college stadium. Well, they were saying maybe the White Sox would build a new stadium there,

which would be kind of cool. Because it is obviously an incredible location. That part will suck. But in terms of the actual facilities and being able to host big-time events would be cool. The Big Ten Championship game should be in Chicago every year. By the way, thank you for giving me tickets to Wrigley. I appreciate that.

Yeah, that was fun. Sass could have had that same thing, but he's too big for me. Well, I got it from Frank, too. You sat in the seats that I got from Frank. I loved the seats where I was at. That was very good. Yeah, it was the same seats they were at. Those are six seats.

Front row of the second section. Yeah, so you can like leg room yeah really get your and speaking of that my Wrigley Field hot dog review will be coming out should we do

hot dogs or no you didn't go to the bleachers no I didn't they won't let us in the bleachers I know you can't go in there

unless you got a ticket yeah they won't let us in the bleachers and Doug's wanted to do like a recreate the scene from Rookie of the Year yeah hot dogs is out there it's very good do like a recreate the scene from Rookie of the Year.

Yeah, Hot Dogs is out there. It's very good. You can't recreate the scene from Rookie of the Year. You can try. I mean, I don't even know if you can attempt. Well, Doug's likes recreating iconic

movie scenes. You could attempt, but you would have to catch a home run ball in order to do it. It's the best sports movie probably ever. Frank, where do you get your hair cut? The year it came out. I cut my own... Well, I like to go to sports clips. Yes, sports.

It works. The sport clip, you know, you can watch games while you're getting your hair cut. Yeah, that's right. They got stylists that don't just wash your hair. Is that right? That is right, 100%. Yeah, that's right. They got stylus that don't just wash your hair. Is that right? That is right. 100%.

Yeah, they use a seven pressure point massaging shampoo technique that is so relaxing. The stylus there are not on opioids. And you know what I like? You melt in your seats. That's every other place. You melt in your seat in the hot steam towel. Oh, yes. Great clips.

They're all nodding off. It's not sport clips. It's infused with tea tree oil and perfectly steamed, leaving you feeling like you just left a Swedish sauna. And to top it off, you get pinpoint cut. Stop by Sport Clips today and ask for the MVP haircut experience. It's ridiculously relaxing. Sport Clips, the pros in men's hair.

TJ, do that. And that's how. There he is. That's how it makes the whole experience. Oh, yeah. Agreed. Go, go. Now he can see the TV, though. Did he just rub his belly? That's how it makes the whole experience Oh yeah Agreed Go Go Now he can see the TV though

Did he just rub his belly? I'm like Is he gonna eat that? What should I do? Go just Ah He You're scared of this guy

He seems like he wouldn't take it well No shake his hand And then just do a quick tug I don't think he would laugh He'll find it funny Just a quick tug A quick tug? Yeah

On his hand No just Just go at it Just lean into it Don't even touch him. Non-contact scare. Yeah, non-contact scare. I'm not.

I didn't build a pull from him yet. He might, like, stab me. Yeah. Unbelievable. Frank, what would you do if you were me? Oh, no. I think he might be. Oh, and you go do it.

How am I in the frame as well? What am I doing? Am I pantsing him? Yeah, that's trippy. How'd you get there? I was checking my phone. I don't know this guy but I'm willing to bet

this guy at one time was a police officer. Yes. All the more. Frank, go ask him if he thinks he's tough. Are they coming out with a new iPhone by the way

because mine's starting to not work. Mine's shattered. Mine's still rocking with the 7. Got the home button. Love it. Kyle, yours dies as soon as you keep it unplugged. It's shattered. Mine is still rocking with the seven. Got the home button. Love it. Kyle, yours dies

as soon as you keep it unplugged. It's like a challenge. Mine can't stay plugged now. It's the worst. Yeah, I'm going to go get it. It did just come out, I think, though. It did?

I knew it. I think Jeff was posting about it. These fucking guys, they do it every time and they always get me. You know what they do, don't you? They actually put like a virus on the old phone

so you can buy the new phone. Yes. Also, I watch a lot of porn on my phone, so that probably has something to phone. Also, I watch a lot of porn on my phone. So that probably has something to do with it. Gotta be. Everyone, Steven, thought that was weird. Yeah.

What did you think was weird? Watching porn on your phone was weird. God, he's so weird. It was clear that he makes it like a whole thing. Yeah. Laptop, candle. Laptop is tough because where do you put the laptop? On your groin?

Next to a pillow fort? Next to a desk? That's weird. Are you using a laptop? Uh-oh. The newspaper cover? Uh-oh. Front page news.

All right. How about this one? The world's first. The world's first. IMAX porn theater. Oh, my God. Yeah. Wouldn't have to defend my dick in IMAX in Dubai.

I still have my Oculus in the box. I got to bring it in. You've never... Nope. One of the all-time impulse. We played it once, and I was like, got to have this. And I never, ever have opened it.

Can I give it to Tommy? Sure. But I get to give it to Tommy. Okay. Still got Halloween, Trick or Treat. Are y'all actually going to do it? Yes. Here's what we need to discuss.

Sunday. What age is too old to Trick or Treat? Not him. Not him. He's 11. No, that's fine. I think 8th grade to trick or treat? Not him. Not him. He's 11. No. That's fine. Eighth grade and below.

Eighth grade you do it ironically. Seventh and eighth you do it ironically. There's a two year phase in and out. Is he in fifth grade? Yeah, he's 11. Yeah.

He's more than fine. Sweet spot. I stopped when I was 13. I've never stopped. Fair. Yeah. Still woke up. Well, you had a kid in eighth grade and started taking him. Yeah, that's true. I've never stopped. Fair. Yeah. Still woke up. Well, you had a kid in eighth grade that started taking him.

Yeah, that's true. I was carrying him around. Are they going to come to you, or do you guys want to come to Long Island? We'll figure it out. We'll have to do it on a Saturday. We're not going to do it on a Sunday. Owen says he has an all-time. Wait, you aren't going to do it on Halloween?

I want to go to Owen's neighborhood. You're not going to do it on Halloween? I don't know. We'll figure it out. It's NFL Sunday. Come on. I don't know. We'll figure it out.

Figure it out. You don't have to go. We'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. Sounds like we're not going to figure it out. Me and Kyle get to pick their costumes.

Yeah. No, the five-year-old has, he knows what he wants. He can pick mine. He can pick Kyle's. Okay, all right. And then Tommy. Frank, what five-year-old has... He knows what he wants. He can pick mine. He can pick Kyle's. Okay, all right. And then Tommy.

Frank, what was your favorite costume ever? I think maybe just something really simple like ghosts. Yeah, yeah. Aerodynamic ghosts. What was my favorite costume ever? I would say... Gary Coleman. Going as Lenny Dykstra four days after

the Mets Wonder World Series wow that's good is that a new Mets hat damn that's Oculus it's not a

yeah it's a newer hat look at that that picture still defies the laws of physics yeah what a creep

what game was that were you playing Frank he was playing there was like shooters and I was trying to shoot people. Dick Suck 3000. Dick Suck. Pull up the post. He's about to suck the dick.

No, no, no. There we go. Okay, never mind. Never mind. It wasn't Dick Suck 3000. It was not Dick Suck 3000. It's my favorite Oculus game I have the high record on that game

The high record Yeah I've never hit 3,000 No no no 2,055 That's a lot of ticks though Yeah Spider

Spider Everyone's wearing the new Buddha pad. Yeah, we all got it. Really cool. Yeah, seems like y'all got it. Well, it is hoodie season. It is. Damn right it is.

I got the new Indiana Carhartt put on my desk today. Oh, yeah, those are nice. Oh, the Notre Dame? Yeah, yeah. I'm going to wear that tomorrow. How's the college football show going? It's going great. The Brandon Walker College Football Show is fantastic.

Did you talk about Jacob Haney? Hainer. Hainer is his name. I'm going to do that tonight. Oh, so you didn't do it yesterday. It's not Jacob. It's Jake Hainer. It's not Jacob Hainer.

What I said plays. Yeah, it's Jake Hainer. When you talk about the Fresno State quarterback. How many t-shirts do you own? Too many. Five or six hundred probably. That's too many t-shirts do you own? Too many. Five or six hundred, probably. That's too many t-shirts. Oh, my God.

That's like 12. I haven't worn a t-shirt a second time in two years since I started here, I don't think. I have like 50, and I wear maybe four of them. I have too many. I'm going to start giving them away. Mine disappear. I've been losing mine left and right. It's our laundry place.

Yeah. You guys share a laundry place? Yeah. But don't you live far apart? No. Oh. No. You both in Phi Di?

Yeah. Oh, wow. You talking to me? No. Kyle. Kyle. I picked up these jeans today, and there was a mean ooze on the pants. There's always an odor on the towels.

That came from your dick. I don't think it was a seep. No, not Nick. You see? It's green seepage. You see, this is why these laundromats really do. I don't think it was a seep. No, not Nick. You see? It's green seepage. A little Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle action. These laundromats really do. I mean, come on.

You know what we need to do? No, you don't need to say it anymore. Frankie said it all. I mean, come on. You know what we need to do? Come on. We need to make a guy's laundromat, which has TV screens and sports. You have the laundry going.

For the fellas. Yeah. You have the dryers going, and you have a bar. No detergent. That's feminine. Just fucks up the washing. I just want hot water. Shake it up. Well, yeah. I like Purex.

Okay, that's probably the most masculine way. Purex. But, well, come on. You have to wash clothes. That's two the most masculine way. Pure X. But, well, come on. You have to wash clothes. I mean, that's two hours of misery. Yeah. Two hours of sheer misery when you have to do the clothes. Because you're sitting there, you're just watching the clothes,

and there's always something horrible on in the laundromat. You are watching the clothes. I don't have to do it. I got a wife. Come on, Brandon. It's 2021, bro. I know. She'll do it in 2022, too.

Jesus Christ. Larry the Cable Guy over here. Spoiler alert. 2023, she'll still be doing it. Yes, sir. Damn, bro. Unless she's cooking by then. You never double wear on the show?

I probably have. But I don't double wear. I try not to double wear. I was going to say you could do some sort of giveaway, maybe. I'm going to give away. We're trying to do every Power 5 school like Big Cat did with hats, right? Yeah, I got Wisconsin on today. Hell yeah.

And your quarterback's fed marks. His style is what? Light jeans. And Jordan 1s. Brandon, who's the most – you stopped wearing 1s entirely. Brandon just like, it can't be seen. You told me to get Jordan 1s. Because I'm not trying to be – I don't own a shoe.

But that's what you told me. You said get Jordan 1s. I don't own a shoe. But that's what you told me. You said get Jordan 1s. I don't own a shoe. And then I saw you wearing them every day. I was like, well, that phase is done. You recruited me to this lifestyle. No, I told you. You asked.

I was like, yeah, I don't own a shoe style. Big Cat had a whiter guy come in and gentrify his Jordan 1s. Yeah. Somehow Brandon has gentrified my life. These are purple, though. Okay, so what does that have to do with gentrification? You don't wear purple ones. I have purple ones.

Fine. And I have worn them, and I threw them in the trash. You recruited me to this lifestyle. I didn't recruit you. You said, hey, join me. Let's wear Jordan 1s. No, that's not it. You said, hey, can I buy Jordan 1s?

I was like, yeah, I don't fucking own shoes. It's been a while since you've bought a pair of shoes, Brandon. You do own shoes, though. No, I know, but I don't own a style of shoes. So I was like, what am I to't fucking own shoes. It's been a while since you've bought a pair of shoes, Brandon. You do own shoes, though. No, I know, but I don't own a style of shoes. So I was like, who am I to say? Yeah, I mean, that was what, a month? Probably, yeah. It's been a while.

Can we pick you out a pair right now? Let's buy some shoes. Oh, no, we'll do it on the screen. We're going to pick out a pair of shoes. I want some Adidas Forum 84s, light blue, but they don't have them in size 14. If anybody out there can get me a pair of Adidas Form 84s in light blue, I want that. I just described them as much as I could.

Billy Eilish and Aaron Jordan, your two favorites. I want Adidas Form 84s. Search Adidas Form. Let's get you some Yeezy Foams. Yeah, we should. Form 84. That one?

Lower. The light blues right there? Those are awesome. Yeah, we should. Forum 84. That one? Ooh. No, lower. Lower. Whoa. No, lower. The light blues right there, those are awesome. Up, up, up, up. Oh, the darker blue? No, up. One more.

This one, but the lighter blue. That's royal blue. I want the lighter blue. Hit that. I'm going to buy those. Yeah, I want to buy those, too. Those are the ones I want. I'm going to buy them. They don't go up into 14s, but Big Cat, can you get them for the rest of the show?

Thanks, man. I would love a pair. Thanks, big bro. Those are the ones I want I'm going to buy them They don't go up into 14s But Big Cat Can you get them For the rest of the show Thanks man I would love a pair Appreciate you Thanks Big Bro Those are the ones I want Get them I can't make them Because I was 14 This was fun

Oh that's them That's them That's them Those are them They have 12s What is 12 Oh No I don't Yeah okay I'll give you my credit card That's them. That's them. Those are them? They have 12s? What is 12? Oh.

No, I don't. Yeah, okay. I'll give you my credit card information here. Go ahead. I want the, no, no, these are the shoes I want really badly. Well, they don't come in 14s. Why are you going to deprive Big Cat? Oh, those are sick. I'm buying those right after this.

See how you like it. I found those shoes. See how you like it. I found those shoes. See how you like it. Those are sick shoes. I want them. You should I found those shoes. See how you like it. Those are sick shoes. I want them. You should become a Timberland guy this winter.

No. Yeah, you should. No. You'd make such a hardcore Timberland guy. You'd look really tall. They're too heavy. Oh, God. How do you walk around?

Yeah, you want a chopped cheese cake. Oh, dear God. Chopped cheese and Timberland. Brandon with a Yankee flat, Brandon. I love my rankings of teams. They really get people going. Someone just replied two days later. I did my Big Cats 0-3 NFL power rankings,

and some guy replied two days later, just now, Colts don't deserve to be on this list. Built on good defense, line and run game, Seattle, Rams, Tennessee are bad matchups for them. But it's not like a deserving list. It's an objective list. That's the one qualifier. Right? Ratio him.

I just tweeted it. Doesn't it make you feel good, though, that some people are like that much dumber than you? Yeah, it does. They just't it make you feel good, though, that some people are that much dumber than you? Yeah, it does. They just get so upset. So upset. And they can't help themselves, even when they know it's a joke, and they still can't help themselves. All right.

With your college football rankings, too. Yeah, those are against the spread. Those are completely objective. No, I don't think they are. What do you mean? Because Rutgers was number two last week, and they covered the spread against number one. And then you didn't move to number one. Arkansas won outright as an underdog.

Rutgers was 4-0 against the spread. Right. Rutgers is... Arkansas is also undefeated against the spread. They won as an outright underdog. It was number one against number two in the country, and Rutgers covered against number one. They won as an outright underdog. It flies in the face of logic

of rankings. What are you talking about? A thousand years of rankings. If two beats one, they're one. I think he's thinking if you take Moneyline and Brad each week. Two didn't beat one. Two did beat one. They lost. Two covered against one. It's a covering game. See, this is what we have to see.

If Rutgers gives State University of Ohio a... Is that how we're saying things now? Yes. I refuse to call them by... What did they do to you? Their fans are annoying with that stupid... Everybody's fans are annoying.

No, no, no. Especially that. They tried to trademark the word the. So from now on, they're State University of Ohio to me. Love it. I do like that. Fuck them. And when they lose,

I'm going to celebrate when they lose the game. Nice. Who do you root for, Frank? Notre Dame? Yes. The Notre Dame. Brandon, who's the most

power five, non-power five team? Is it Cincinnati? It's this year or... Just like in general? In general, I would say it has to be Cincinnati. UCF's coming with it though. Who's the least power five

power five? No, because Cincinnati also has basketball. The least power five power five is Vanderbilt. In football or everything? Because they had a woman. Everything pretty much. And they let a woman kick. That's fine. They did let a woman kick. The swap was fine. They did have a pretty good baseball team.

Yeah, they do. That's true. Not really. It's a fraud team. Well, apparently half their players are going to end up not making the majors because they burned all their arms out. Yeah, they abused their players. Vanderbilt's like the only team to ever fuck up pinstripes.

I don't like their pinstripes. I agree. Oh, when they do the black with the gold pinstripes is especially bad. You're right. Good point, Owen. At least power five, power five, you know. Rutgers? Nah.

TJ's mad at you now. My bad. There goes Frank's screen time on the yak. I don't know if you heard. You're a powerful enemy. Report a border around powerful enemy. Now. Report a border around that state. Now, I guess you'd have to count basketball, but in football.

No, Vanderbilt's probably the answer. In football, the worst program in the Power Five. Wake Forest? Northwestern would have been the answer before they got good at football. Kansas. No, their basketball is like the best basketball. He said football, though. He said football.

Football. What is Wake Forest good at? They're good at football this year. And they've had notable basketball players like Tim Duncan. Yeah, they have a terrific NBA history, too. You know, in the 70s, Wake Forest was so bad that Steely Dan actually used the song Call Me Deacon Blues as a reference to how bad Wake Forest is. Really?

That was about Wake Forest? They have a name for the winners. I don't think so. The lyric goes, they have a name for the winners in the world. They call Alabama the Crimson Tide. Call Me Deacon Blues, which was kind of a backhanded reference to how bad Wake Forest football was at the time. I love Steely Dan.

Who are the guys in Steely Dan again, Frank? There's Steely and there's Dan. I don't know these guys' names. Good trick question that you went away from. All right. That's the show. See you tomorrow. Good show, Frank.

Good show, Frank. Good show, Frank. Thank you.