The Yak - Looking Back On Our Middle School Perversions | The Yak 11-28-22

Episode Date: November 28, 2022

It's like walking on marbleYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. I don't have a voice. It's the Yak. It's the Yak. I don't have a voice. It's the Yak. Hey, big cat. It sucks. I jinxed myself.

I said I did. You almost made it. I almost made it. And you came off like your biggest break of the year with this. Fuck. Yeah, my kids got sick over Thanksgiving, so I got sick. Oh, sorry. Wait.

Sorry. You lost your voice or you're, so I got sick. Oh, sorry. Wait. Sorry. You lost your voice or you're sick? I was sick. Okay. And on the tail end of being sick, lost my voice. Hmm. You want to say that? I have nothing to say.

When you have kids, you're going to get sick more than people that don't have kids. Not complaining. That's how life happens. That's how, that's the circle of life. Your kids do that classic kid cough. Or whatever it sounds like. I can't do the kid cough. Everything. Just wiping noses. All that shit.

Alright. I'm going to try to power through, but I might just not talk for a little bit. I lost my voice too. I can barely talk. You sound better than you've ever sounded. Really? Yeah. Thank you. You have a deep voice right now. I was fucked up that you did that to me. Yeah. Your voice is in HD right now.

Dan, you know I've lost my voice as well. Don't you know that mine's gone out? Mine's gone, too. Completely gone. That was fucked up. This is painful. Dude, you're powering through really well. Thank you.

All right. You jerk. All right. Here's what we're going to do. Yak, where is everyone? Where's Roan and Sass? Sass City is going to be five late. Roan's on an island, I think.

Roan, yeah. Roan was on some sort of tropical island. I think the boy, Will Compton, might be showing up at any moment now. All right. So here's what we're going to do. Yak, go to the Barstool Sports store right now 20 off everything in the store if you buy something on the yak uh branded site so click yak you buy any yak item you're automatically entered to win a uh one of our pizza hut jackets can we it? Warm-up jackets from Yak Basketball.

Vintage Pizza Hut. There's only six of them, maybe eight. Flip it around. Flip it around, Steven. Come on. Show it off. Do we have our name on it? Put it on?

Yeah. It has our names on them stitched in. I feel like Steven's making me talk more. Yeah. Why is he mute? Why is he covering up the name? Just talk. Steven, talk to us.

Jesus fucking Christ. It was on, too? Yeah talk. Steven, talk to us. Jesus fucking Christ. It was on too? Yeah, these are the Pizza Hut jackets. They're awesome. Yeah, throw it on. We all kind of were surprised when these came out for the event. It was very cool. It fit great.

Very old school feel. I love them. Why were you just doing that muted? They did not let us keep them. What? Why were you just showing it off muted? You said go get it and hold it up. That's what I was doing. It's true. Fuck. All right. They did not let us keep them. What? Are you just showing it off muted? You said go get it and hold it up.

That's what I was doing. It's true. Fuck, all right. Hey, you had a, well, I'll finish. All right, so if you buy anything in the Barstool Sports Store, Yak-related, we're going to just say the names. Like, every five minutes, we'll just pick someone randomly who gets that for free. Let's say their full names, and we have their address as well.

Let's say that, too. We can do that. And then, on top of that, whoever buys the most Yak stuff in this hour and a half of the show- It's my chair. No. Oh. I will fly them to New York, one night hotel.

They can come hang out and watch an episode of the Yak from the booth. Oh, a live audience. Yes. I want them sitting there. I'd imagine you'd get a chance to talk. I'd imagine. Yeah. Yeah.

So, Pilar, can you update us what the amount is that's the leader in the clubhouse? It's going to be DiMartino. Yeah. Probably. Yeah. The Yak Kiss coins are out now. We have $99 in the store 400 have already sold

They came out Why 999? I kept one for rigs Okay Only 400 have sold? Yeah, I believe so How many do we have total? 999

Oh You just said that Okay, yeah Oh, it's good You're sick as a dog I can barely hear either Oh no, that was just the email That was sent out Oh, you just said that. Okay, yeah. Oh, it's good. You're sick as a dog. Yeah. I can barely hear either. Oh, no, that was just the email that was sent out.

Yeah, me and Big Cat, we lost our voices. I can barely hear either. My ears are ringing. His voice sounds fine. I can't even tell. You're a warrior right now. I'm batting like 250 on Saturday. I don't like what Sash is doing. He's about to do it, yeah.

He just walked in and was like, wait, you guys are all sick? I want to talk about this. I mean, listen to us. You guys sound terrible. I sound terrible. I know. That's why you're texting. I almost didn't come in.

What? You texted saying you had no voice. Yeah. But I was super sick, too. So I'm right here with you, boys. Here we go. Not anymore. I beat it.

I was so sick like two months ago. No, I've been sick for like a month. You've been sick a lot. Yeah, I know. My mom thinks I have autoimmune problems. AIDS? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. How was your guys' breaks? Huh? Great. I lost my voice. I'm not going to talk a lot during this episode. You guys need to talk. So, during this episode so what do we got any other things with merch

we're going to have somebody in the booth we got the jackets I gave my jacket away so somebody will be getting my Yak basketball jersey I gave both away very limited edition covered in sweat and pizza crumbs oh very exciting

way to sweeten the pot Yak live Covered in sweat and pizza crumbs. Oh. Yeah. Very exciting. Yeah, very good. And Big Cat, way to sweeten the pot. Yak Live, do they get to pick the episode? And you know how... How does that work? We are. They'll just end up... Yeah, they'll just be with us. They'll probably be on the show from now on.

Yeah, there's a chance for... Chance of getting hired from that. Pretty good. What do we got, Che? First jacket has been given away randomly selected patrick a patrick a we can't give away his last name but patrick a jacket appreciate the support whose jacket are they getting names on the right mediums he's a medium so pft should be on

that's a damn good one that's a medium, so PFT. It should be on... Oh, bad. I'm going to go based on size. That's a damn good one. That's a really good one. What's up with the telethon today? There's like a goal out there. Yeah, we're going to be doing some soccer, I guess. I guess Clemmer is playing a goalie. You get $1,000 if you score on him or something. Really?

There's eight goalies. It feels like just a free $1,000. That's a free $1,000. There's eight goalies, and if you get a save, you get $1,000. And if you don't save it, I don't know who gets the $1,000. That's $3,000. If you get a save, you get $1,000. And if you don't save it, I don't know who gets the $1,000. It goes to some sort of fund. Am I saying it wrong? There's an email.

Why are you acting like... I don't like Stephen Chase's face there. You've heard of that. I'll just make it up. I'm sorry. I don't know the deals of the soccer thing tonight. You were looking at me. Okay.

For every 10K that gets sold, a siren goes off, and there will be a kick on the goal. And eight previously selected Barstool goalies will try to save each kick. So there's going to be eight different goalies. Who's the eight goalies? I don't know. Jerry's one. Clemmer's one.

Clemmer's one. Tico's one. So if the goalie saves it, they get the eight, they get one K per save. If they don't save it, Barstool will be giving away two tickets per goal to random stoolies for an event of their choosing. So like rough and rowdy, like a live event or whatever. If we sell a certain amount, they're going to be giving away two Super Bowl tickets or two Taylor Swift tickets to a random person.

And they'll all be announced on the Monday Night Football stream following the telethon. So that's all on the Barstool blog, too. That's crazy. Goalies are Jerry, Keegs, Spider, Big T, Tico, Tommy Smokes, Nadu. Glamour. Oh, man. If you have one kick on each of them, what are you going?

Like probably left? No, I'm saying like out of eight. Who am I picking? You've got brain fog. You're sick as hell. Who am I picking? You're going eight out of eight, 100%. You're going eight out?

Oh, no. I'm never overestimating my athletic ability. I'd probably go like three for eight. No, you'd go five for eight. Also, I think Clemmer's going to have like goalie goals and shit. Yeah, eight. No, you'd go five for eight. Oh. Also, I think Clemmer's gonna have like goalie goals and shit. Yeah, word. No, you'd go five for eight. Trust me. I'm done playing sports.

I tried ice skating. Just couldn't do it. Did you go to Rockefeller Center? In North Carolina. Oh. So crowded with kids. If I had more space, I would've been fine. Did you go figure skates or hockey skates? Oh, fuck. have been fine. Did you go figure skates or hockey skates? Oh, fuck.

Oh, yeah, hockey skates. You pegged me as a figure skate kind of guy. I can see you twirling out there. Shit. What's the difference? The figure skates are like straight. Figure skates are brown and the hockey skates are black. Yeah, that is the big difference, really.

Figure skates have the spikes on the top so you can twirl. Yeah. All right, what do we got with the World Cup standing? All right, this is going to get very interesting. Yes. Nothing we predicted was. It was a very big game today. Serbia got three points.

You and Roan got three goals apiece in a 3-3 draw. Yep. So now it's changed a lot. Zah might be in real trouble depending on what Brazil's doing right now. Could it be? Brazil just play? So Brazil just play. Could Brazil just play? Could he not win and lose?

Did we ever consider this? He could win and lose. That's insane. Yeah, we never thought about that. That's insane, but that can't be. Although, I don't think he could win. No, no, because Brazil would have to score in the next. They'd have four more games after.

I don't know if you can win. It would be insane. I'm in trouble. But all three of my teams are looking to move on. Is MP matches played? It is. Probably, yeah. It is.

I have Uruguay going today, Argentina tomorrow. I think the key here is you want your teams to move on. Yeah. Yeah, but you need them to score the most. They're going to play their weakest opponents in this round. So you need them to score the most. They're going to play their weakest opponents in this round. So you need them to score now. Right, but like more games is more opportunity to score. Yeah, but if you're like in the next round.

Just try not to lose. Eight of them are going to lose, and they might get shut out. There's no guarantee you're going to score goals if you move through. You need to score now. Right, but there is a guarantee you won't score goals if you don't move through. Correct. That is correct. What happened? Yeah is a guarantee you won't score goals if you don't move through. Correct. That is correct. What happened?

Yeah, so Brazil just won 1-0. That's not good for Zaha. That's not great for Zaha. No. He's still in last. I started City of God yesterday. First eight minutes, I'm hooked. Great movie.

City of God? City of some movie. That's the one about the photographer, right? You stopped after eight minutes? Yeah, but after the eight, I was like, I'm not done with this movie. I'm going to watch more. My attention span is so trash.

I could do eight minutes straight, and then I'm like, alright, I've got to go play. So it was an eight-minute tryout, and you know that... And I know that it was the eight minutes, first eight minutes is good enough, I'm going to be in. So they're on the roster now. It's a long-term goal to finish that movie. Do you think if you ranked your favorite movies and your favorite first eight minutes of movies it would be a different list oh yeah yeah i can't think of any examples off the top yeah yeah all w 187 dollars top spender

right now in the uh store for the act maybe you bring your laser pointer in it hasn't arrived yet i made some moronic purchase. What the fuck is it? Now, mine's better than that. What? Whatever that is. What's what? The laser pointer on you. Do you not see it?

Yeah, but did you think it was mine? I never thought it was yours. I said it's better than whatever's on you. Obviously. Oh, you. Oh, for fuck's sake. Where did you think it was coming from? Yeah, good.

Yeah, dude, I'm sick as a dog. Yeah, I got a laser pointing directly across the room. Kyle, you were bored in North Carolina and you just bought stuff. You guys were gambling on the games and I'm not doing that yet. So I bought some stuff. You got a class C Pluto grade laser pointer? Yeah. What color is that?

It's green. Is that the kind that can stop an airplane pilot from being able to? Oh yeah. The green ones can pop balloons. Really? Green ones are good.

I was driving to the train this morning with my mom was driving me and there was a bus in front of us and I was shining it at the kids in the bus. Hell yeah.

I'm going to pass them out to a bunch of homeless guys and see what happens. They're going to take down a plane. This is just a shitty one though. I got this when I was a kid. Brought it home. In middle school that was like the hot item to have. You were God if you had a laser pointer. You could put the filters on

them that said like fuck you. Throw up the mud flap woman. Oh yeah the lady who said no. Nice. This one's pretty shitty, actually. That's not a bad one. It's longer, at least. It's not one of those bullet-sized ones. No.

Wouldn't put a fresh pair of triple A's in it today. Damn. So it's shining brighter than ever. Oh, yeah. But it's like 10 years old. Do we have live updates on who's buying, who's in the lead? I think Pilar's in there. Yeah, every 10 minutes.

Can we set it up so we can all see? I'm curious. No, because a bunch of people's personal information will be all over it. I'm fine with that. Shit. Perfectly fine with that. I had fun watching the 0-0 USA game. I did too.

It kept me... It was exciting. It was exciting. That Pulisic shot off the crossbar. It was frustrating. It was exciting. It was exciting. That Pulisic shot off the crossbar. It was frustrating. It was frustrating. But it kept me, you know, I wasn't distracted at all. I've been into the World Cup.

I haven't watched it as much because the times are just so weird. But when I have watched, it's been interesting. The next round will be a lot better. Donnie's thriving in Qatar. That is the perfect country for him. We've gone on so many trips with him, and whenever he's without us, he has a blast.

I wonder why. Did PFT already come back? Fun suckers. Yeah, he's here. Kat, come on, talk a little. You know, if you whisper, it actually makes your voice better. I mean, Kyle's sick.

He's done. I'm in pain, though. I understand where he's going. I want to talk. I have to do two more shows after this. It's like the worst. It's the only Monday all year that I have to do a bunch of shit. You on the tea?

What? You sipping tea? Yeah, I'm sipping tea. A lemon juice? I'm going to buy some soup. You want soup? Yeah. Maybe I'll just sit out, because it's weird for me to be here and not talk.

I think you're a warming presence. You're storming out? We've got the college football show too. Go ahead and take a break. Let's spin the wheel. All right. You can take a break. In that way, Taylor will.

Is Will going to be here? Can I add a wedge to my wheel? Scream, Will. Will, I heard he was going to be in the office, and I text him. I said, are the rumors true? He said, not those, but going to be in the office and I text him and I said, are the rumors true? And he said, not those, but I'll be in the office today. I don't know what it could be. What?

What is something I would know? No, not those really bad ones. No, not those. I don't know where you heard that from. I hope you don't believe those. But, no, I'll be in the office today, though, if you want to talk about it. Oh, Mason K.

Mason K, new leader. Go. Mason K. I think I know them. Masak? That's right. K, you still off the beers? Yep.

Like, 23 days. It's not – it doesn't hit the same as last time i'm on the beers hard harder than ever yeah i was in pittsburgh and i went to the stealer game and i just had to had to go icy light mangoes it's like drinking a capri sun oh yeah i think i had 200 that's not bad not bad They were tall boys Yeah yeah I assumed so And how'd you get home? You didn't fly

Oh it was the worst experience What was the You got a bus? You took a But not any ordinary bus Took a A flix bus What is that?

Like the lime green ones Take the bus every time Well no I was in Rochester It was lime green Yeah I was stranded in Rochester And there was no flight and the train from rochester here was sold out today and tomorrow and so i had to buy a bus ticket usually a round trip ticket to rochester backs like 60 bucks yeah one way this was 145

got the last seat on the bus 20a i go onto the bus yesterday morning in Rochester, like a sketchy bus stop in Rochester. I'm looking at the numbers as you do as you're walking down the aisle. I'm just like, this bus isn't fucking long enough. The last seat in the bus was 16. And they were like, yeah, we sent the wrong bus. You could just sit anywhere. And this one guy's seat was where the bathroom was and the bus driver's like you can sit in the bathroom if you want he's like no jesus christ that's and the guy just the kid just like lean you can sit in the

if you want yeah and so the bathroom that's an option i guess but like our our bus driver like i walk in he just has like a very full ashtray he was like smoking cigarettes like that move um but the bathroom which i was sitting right next to if you used it there were these fucking water jugs and you had to grab a water jug and pour it in the toilet oh god it was what the fuck It was supposed It was supposed to leave at 11am And I was supposed to get here at 5 I got back at like 8.30pm

Let's just rent a car next time I don't have a license Just fly Expired My license expired As soon as I moved to New York And now I've been in New York For two years

And if I want to get my license again I have to retake my driver's test That's insane. That is also insane. I'm fucked across the board. I just can't believe you have to take your driver's test again. New York. Nick, it's like a 20 minute flight.

From Rochester? Yeah. You know how small that plane would be? No, it's not that small. They were sold out. Really? I didn't look. No, you didn't. But no, it was a very, very, there were no outlets on the bus. Dude, that is brutal. And the last time it was the dude that was just throwing up the whole time? Oh, the last time was that guy that had like, that was a mega bus.

Yeah. And the whole top part of the bus was like empty, but he sat next to me with all these bags, immediately starts puking. Then I get up and move. But bus experiences aren't great the greyhound is the worst though and that's still better than any other option for you like mentally that's still no as soon as i got on the bus i was just like i need to i think it cured my fear yeah that's not worth it this dude was going back to take a shit and it took like two of the jugs of water to flush it out we had to pull over so we could refill the jugs of water it was a really really bad experience someone go down to that river refill the jugs this woman accused me of stealing her phone because it fell off her lap

when she was asleep and it slid up to my like area bad slid back to my area that's a nightmare i took it i feel like the amtrak like you shouldn't I took it this morning I just got in and I had to sit at a table on the Acela which it feels like that should be like a cheaper like you shouldn't be paying for the same seat that everyone else is paying for and then get stuck in the table yeah it's like assigned seats and I'm sitting with a whole family yeah so it's like me the dad one of the kids the mom and baby, and I'm in the window seat just sitting there. And it's like, this is super awkward, but I'm paying the same as the people that are sitting behind me

with their whole row to themselves. They were assigned seats, though? Yeah, if you take the Asella, it's assigned seats. Did your respective towns have, like, gangs of iPhone thieves, especially when they first came out? Yeah. Zars did. I remember ours.

Those were the coolest guys in town. They were so good at stealing iPhones. They would go to the Wheeling Park pool and just hit lick after lick. They would also, when you buy a shitty house and flip it, they would flip the iPhones. They would put custom colored days in them. Did you ever get yours stolen? I didn't have an iPhone until college. I had a Windows phone.

I got it because it looked like a Pokedex. Oh, hell yeah. What? Sorry. Whoa. Pokedex. My bad. Another jacket off the board?

Who's it going to? We have another jacket. Looks like a female Yak fan. Yeah, Lady Yak. Rachel M. She's going to be getting Billy's jacket. Whoa, Rachel. Rachel.

Rachel. I want to do a Lady Yak jacket. The pink lady's jacket. Oh, Rachel, Rachel, Rachel. I want to do a lady act jacket. The pink lady is like. Oh, yeah. Can you spin the wheel and then I'll go sit at my desk? Yeah, just me and Rachel. Kyle, are you taking the Amtrak tomorrow off to Boston? What is how?

I already got my Amtrak ticket that got emailed to me. Uh-oh. Oh, yeah, I am then. Look at that. Wow. That's right. Uh-oh. Oh, yeah, I am then. Look at that. Wow. That's right. That's crazy. So when we get a wheel reset, it resets our energy to a name wheel as well, I think.

So you have the death of Yak Sliver. Oh, okay. You agree, Dan? Yes. All right, I'm going to go sit at my desk. I'll come back for the end to see who we're flying to. His headphone just fell apart. Sounds like shit. I'm sorry, to. His headphone just fell apart. It sounds like shit.

I'm sorry, everyone. That's okay. I feel like you are representing how pretty much everyone, even everyone listening, feels after Thanksgiving break. I feel like you don't come out of this refreshed. No, it sucks so much. You go home and you're like, this is going to be great, like a nice relaxing week.

It usually is not. You relax too much. you eat too many carbs. I got sick. Do you want to sub someone in? Will and Taylor. Oh, yeah. Mike R. 223. Way to go, Mike.

Somebody want to hit an ad? We have three. Oh, yeah. Brandon Brandon You're the least sick I don't think Kate's sick Kate are you sick? Okay Alright The black lung It's never too early

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I got a question for the fellas. Ask away. Would you rather your dick look big or feel big? Wait, wait, wait. Time out, time out, time out. Do you mean feel big to you or feel big to? To the partner. Okay.

Feel big. I thought you meant feel big to me. Some days it just does. I don't think anyone ever really gets a good look at my penis. What about you? Oh, you're talking about to your own self? No, no, no, no. It's, I'm not, yeah.

Wait, Kyle. It's very easy to not let that, no one gets like a good view. Anyone who partners with you doesn't get that. No, I mean, that's not that weird if you think about it. I guess you're right. You start laying down, lights are. Yeah, lights are low, you're right.

Lighting is low. You take off the drawers last second. Yeah. So feel big. That does help. It helps your psyche when it feels big. I'm going to go look. But look big and feel small. Yeah.

My fat ass goes away. It's long and it feels... It just goes away. It's like, where'd it go? Did you know the average penis size in Ecuador is like seven inches? Really? Yeah, I looked it up last night. What did you look up? 6.95 or something.

What Google got you there? I don't know. Sometimes when I'm in bed bed I just get real curious. Ecuador? The Galapagos is skewing. I thought Ecuador was one of the shorter countries though. Definitely. Big penises. I believe it was Ecuador.

With the Hispanics, the height does not correlate. Okay. Yeah. Doesn't matter at all, huh? Oh. I'm sure. Average penis size by country. Al G.

Ecuador. Top spender. Ecuador's number one? Wow. It's, I mean, what is, the Galapagos Islands are skewing the poll. I can't fathom. It's based on penis size versus height. Their dick is 10% of their height?

No one has a bigger dick than a tortoise researcher. Yeah, you're right. I think the people on that island are 10% of their height. Wow. Where are we? We're low. Pretty low. Or we're like about in the middle, I think.

It's fine. Yeah, there we are. Yeah, that's okay. Really? We're about 5.6. Fuck you, Russia. Japan by one? Huh. Yeah, that's okay. Really? Who's at the bottom? We're about 5.6. Fuck you, Russia. Beat Japan by one? Yeah, that ain't right.

Okinawa skewing the average. Is it a radiation thing? I watched, have you guys ever seen Black Phone, that new Ethan Hawke movie? No. Sucks. I thought it was supposed to be scary. It is. It's not.

I watched Prisoners. You guys have seen that, the Jake Gyllenhaal movie? It's really good. That movie's phenomenal. And I wanted to watch a movie like that, so I looked up movies like Prisoners. And then I watched it with my family, and we watched Black Phone, and it sucked. Really not great at all. Not scary at all, either.

Unless you're a pussy. A pussy a pussy yeah i started watching that one it's a tv show where still vestrous stallone is in the mob and he gets out of 25 years of prison and they're like we're sending you to tulsa and he's like he's in the bar and told he's like i'm not from here it's great it's really sending you to tulsa it's like bad good if you know what I mean. I also watched the worst movie. I skimmed through the worst movie. I love skimmed through movies. What was it?

It's called Mother and Son. It was a Russian movie. Film buffs rave about it. That pisses me off. You're a Mother and Son guy? There's no way. This one, I think it's on YouTube. That infuriates me when i look up a list of

like best thrillers there's it's like number one 1943 this black and white movie i love jeff and ken jack they've suggested me so many movies there's no way seven samurai could be that good dude it sucks mother and son is like it was like watching a painting because nothing would move for five minutes. Look it up on YouTube and just scroll to a random part and I bet you nobody moves. Really? Those movies suck. Are you sure the slideshow on your smart TV just didn't come up? Yeah.

What's the, oh, Citizen Kane? Yeah. That's supposed to be the best movie ever. Ass. Those bad. I mean, they're not bad movies, but just compared to modern movies. I mean, Citizen Kane holds up pretty well. You think?

Yeah. No. I've not seen it. Would you say Citizen Kane is better than The Dark Knight? Yeah. No, Brandon. Don't lie to yourself. The Dark Knight was fine.

Good. It's got to be better than Citizen Kane. Mike B, 420. i don't know but like i love uh twilight zone i love watching old episodes of the twilight zone mike b you're asking twilight zone's good like they're not bad movies it's just i i don't think that they should be ranked so high up just because they're old i think they should be yeah or i think things where did you even find that movie Kyle there was like a tick tock of like

I bet you haven't seen these movies they're like the true film buffs have seen a certain amount of these movies you took it as a random one

it looked like a vibe god it wasn't a vibe at all no it was kind of frightening I can't imagine watching a Russian movie

there was no dialogue. Was City of God on there? Yeah, no, I just watched that on my own. Have you guys seen City of God? I haven't. I don't watch a lot of movies. Yeah, Mike B. City of God's really good.

What's City of God? Oh, you have a new jacket to give away. Give it up. Tyler T. Gets the first. He's getting a little Sassas jacket. Nice? Oh, you have a new jacket to give away. Give it up. Tyler T. Gets the first. He's getting a little Sassas jacket. Nice. Wow.

Wow. Nice. Thanks, Tyler T. Good job, Tyler T. These are fun to fidget with. They are. I'm dual wielding. I'm a Kimbo right now.

My son has been playing with the one, and I'm afraid he's going to drop it on his toes. It's heavy. It is heavy. It is heavy, but he loves it. Great children's gift as well. Virtual wheels are everywhere now yeah keep i'm like oh fuck that's our thing and i keep reminding myself like we didn't not at all literally invent the wheel we didn't do that oh we didn't but no they are i mean it's the best way to decide things save this show it was ass on YouTube. Yeah. Yes. That transition was tough.

Yeah, it was. It really brought me down. There's really thin tables we had in here. Oh, that was so bad. Oh, that's... I forgot about that. Every other chair was different? Yeah.

That table was like the width of a balance. Yeah. Those tables didn't last long. It's just to do with that. I totally forgot about that. Remember when we kept breaking these every time? Yeah, they would just snap right off. But then I think we were doing it as an act of rebellion.

Yeah, we just started breaking them. Did we have the serious setup at first? I think we got rid of it. Half the room was that little table, and half the room was these chairs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. As soon as the serious deal ended, they were in here to re-destroy. Yeah. They got their shit. They got their shit and left. Yeah, yeah, yeah. As soon as the serious deal ended, they were in here to re-destroy. They got their shit.

They got their shit and left. I liked that setup though. That flying V table. I liked it a lot. I still do wish we had that. It's jarring when you see a clip from them. I know. I wish we were a chest and above show. That's your best part?

Rather than full body. Yeah, you're right. I wish we were a chest and above show. That's your best part? Rather than full body. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. We only had to worry about, because back then I thought cool outfits were centered around the top. It is. It's not. Not anymore, because now it's all legs. Cool outfits are centered around the pants.

This is a legs show. Big time. I saw a legless dude on TikTok live, like on the treadmill. What? Yeah. Just running like on the treadmill. What? Yeah. Just running straight on the stones? And stands? Dude, I only watched like three seconds and I got bored.

Because it's like every other video. They're feeding me like guys with deformities and extreme disabilities. On TikTok live, like guys with half a face DJing. And it was infinite amounts of those guys. I follow this live shrimp dance party. I see it all the time. So I always click.

I follow it now. It's they play techno music and it's little shrimps just are always moving their little feet around and it's mesmerizing. I watch a live shrimp dance party all the time.

I got a tick tock that was like a four second Theo Vaughn joke. It was like something about like the strain of weedy smokes is cocaine or something. I get that a lot. second Theo Vaughn joke. It was like something about like the strain of weedy smokes is cocaine or something. I get that a lot.

But it was like a four second joke but they still did a half. I know. It's phonetic sand. I love the phonetic sand. Phonetic. Sand. I gotta take my nootropics My brain is kinda fucked

Oh you are on death's door brother Why are you so sick? Faking just regular common cold is funny I have the worst cold I might have to get on that My brain's been foggy as hell So foggy as hell. My brain's been so foggy.

Clear as day. I thought going sober would help. Nope. No, not at all. Foggier than ever? Yeah. I don't want to jump on the bandwagon, but same. I can't remember.

It's like little things. If you ask me what I did yesterday, I'm like, uh, I have no idea. Yeah, my memory is bad. Yeah, and I can't tell you, even if I have something scheduled next week, I won't know until the day before. Like, I just can't put it into the future. Oh, no. You know what's scary? I tried to read a book this past week.

I haven't done that in a while. What was the topic about, though? Parenting. Okay. Being a good mom. And I literally, I would get halfway down Like one paragraph And my eyes would start To go across

And I'm like I can't do it I can't read anymore This is it Yeah you gotta get a good book That's why Yeah maybe it's the book Probably reading a bad book

Yeah Get something easy Yeah What do you mind Brandon? There's so many bad books Which shouldn't be a thing I think if you have the ability To write a book

It should be good But Fuck I read something that like To get onto like The New York Times if you have the ability to write a book, it should be good, but fuck. I read something that, like, to get onto the New York Times bestseller list, you only have to sell, like, 7,000 copies. So a lot of authors just buy crates and crates of their own.

Yeah. That seems impressive, though, unless you're, like, already a superstar. Yeah, but, like, the New York Times bestseller list... How do you even market a book? I think it's a lot of people read where do you go to like where's like ads for books i mean i have a kindle and so it just like you get ads and you get new ads those are all i mean do you get ads from like i feel like the ads that i get are from authors that i'm already reading yeah that or i'll get ones that

are like way off base i got one that was about a fire breathing unicorn. And it was like, it probably sounds like it's not way off base. It does sound like something. That wasn't my, that wasn't my speed. I just usually trust when I walk in the bookstore, like I trust that rack that's like, here's the ones everyone's liking right now. I'm like, all right. I hate the term don't judge a book by its cover because covers make. It sells the book for me 100% of the time. that's the only thing you have to go off the only thing

i judge it on yeah sometimes i'll read like the first 50 pages see if it's for me and then i also like it when the uh the edges of the pages are uneven so it makes it look like an older book oh yeah i love that yeah like the series of unfortunate events did that yeah like it's been through the ringer a few times. I remember at the Scholastic Book Fair, I pretended to like this book called The Divide because it opened up from the middle out. It was so sick. That is cool. Book Fair used to be fun.

Yeah, the cover was split and you'd open up middle out. I never once bought something from the Book Fair, but I remember kids would always go with like $200 and buy like toys. I was transitioned into like a toy store at one point. I don't know if you guys. It definitely did, and they always had like magic kits. Yeah. I once hid in the book fair,

and when the teacher took the whole class back, I was successfully hid, and I stayed there the rest of the afternoon. In the book fair? Yes. I loved it. Did you read? Stayed crouched behind.

No, I was hiding. I stayed crouched behind the, it was just a big gray rack. I stayed behind the rack for like three hours awesome i didn't know if i if i got up went back then i thought i'd get in trouble for going back yeah they didn't notice me obviously so i just i just wrote it out i wasn't a bad kid ever i was like i loved rules same so afraid to get in trouble i used i was a wanderer for sure. You were a wanderer? Yeah, in school.

No way. I had laps. Go to the bathroom and just take laps around the school. I was so afraid of germs in high school. I've never been in a high school bathroom. Oh, really? Yeah. Ever?

Ever. The pee? I held my pee all day. That's crazy. I had to shit once and the woman that cut my hair, my beautician, Lisa, had to come pick me up. That sucks so much. I had nobody else to call. Shit so often.

Where did that come from? Do you know? Is there a single thing that happened that you were like, man, I can't do this. Shitting in public bathrooms is miserable. The first time I was ever afraid of something, i was horrified of anthrax as a kid and was it the news was it like what was the news that got me but my mom was like hyper afraid of it as well she was like checking our envelopes in the mail and uh oh yeah i remember my mom with like a mask and gloves inspecting every very afraid of anthrax and so it was when pepsi blue

was out and i went and bought one, and I drank it, and I realized I didn't remember cracking it. I think it was already opened, and I thought it was anthrax in there, and I had a panic attack for the first time ever. It was in first grade. Yeah. Ever since then, I didn't do germs, didn't do anything that would, I don't know.

That's my correlation. Motherfucker Brandon G spent $562 on that stuff. Oh, geez. Brandon G. Let's build a cart that could be up to $562. I don't even know what you could... Yeah. We've got to up our numbers.

This also overlaps with the other... Oh, yeah. So that guy is getting a tour. We're going to meet Brandon G. $500 gets you in here. Hell yeah. You see the bussing with with the boys how much those guys were spending.

That had to have been somebody that plays for like it had to be like somebody that's like five thousand

dollars a lot of money. That yeah. Shit. Whoever wins I will send you fifty dollars.

Yeah. Soften. Yeah. Commit it. I can do Venmo or PayPal Nothing You can do Apple Pay

I love giving the tours I used to like those Barstool Gold tours I used to really enjoy that You ever get any creeps? I don't know The guy who stole stuff off somebody's desk A girl's desk that worked here And then DM'd her to get it back.

Yeah, that was creepy. That was weird. But no, I would go across the street and have beers with people afterwards. That's creepy on its own. On my end, that was creepy by me. You were addicted to alcohol. I was. I had a problem.

Any excuse. Any excuse. But no, I really like doing it. I think I almost took the test to be a New York City tour guide. There's like an official test you have to take. When I used to study for it, this was like nearly a decade ago now, but I wanted to be like an official New York City tour guide. You'd be very good.

I love shit like that. I love just pointing at stuff and making sure other people see what I see. I'm sure you could find a way to do that yeah i still could probably i could study up again and get my why don't you give these tours i will i would love to i guess that's probably why i said it so i could weasel my way in to be the tour guide all right yeah i think you got it sales drop like now okay yeah no thank you whoever has the highest return. Kyle and I tried to do a merch thing where, like, I've always wanted to have a thermometer for sales.

And so we put one out and we were way too ambitious with the sales numbers. I was so embarrassed. That was V2. We even brought the numbers down. That was thermometer V2. How's the gray how's the gray crew neck doing please don't buy that that was like yeah why people keep promoting it too so like that was just like we were on our podcast and i was just like yeah i think you could put we couldn't get a purple sweatshirt so i was like fuck it let's just put a plain gray one

and my thing is live on the pod and they put it up there we never really promote it and it's just been living on the site and now it's like please like please don't listen i hear counterpoint do buy it because i think a nice just plain gray crew neck is cool and good to have yeah but like roster and if you're gonna spend you might as well support the homies. You're going to buy one. Patrick from Fairfield just bought one and just popped up in the box.

Patrick from Fairfield. Those are very accurate. Merry Christmas. I mean, I guess if you're like a subtle barstool fan, and the thing is, the store wouldn't allow you to put anything on the website without a graphic on the front so there's a very very small one pixel black dot on that yeah all the bits so yeah are you serious yeah it's in the upper right

i think somewhere i think you can maybe see it so if you see another guy in a plain gray sweatshirt just whisper to him anus guy anusus? Well, no. And down. I think it's going to be smaller than that. Oh, is that it? Oh, is that it right there? I think I see it. No, upright maybe? You're going to convince yourself like 9,000 things are there.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And we put a bunch of black dots on there. There's one. Yeah, that might be it. Maybe that's it. That one looks the most. Looks like it, yeah. All right, who you got, Steven?

It's actually Brandon's jacket. My jacket. Big boy. Going to Augustus M. What a great name. Southern general. Okay, that works. Roman.

Okay. Okay, all right. Congrats, Augustus. Definitely a slave owner. You think Augustus is a southern name? Augustus, yeah. Yeah, I see Augustus being a southern name. I'd be glad to get stuck in a chocolate name. Augustus? Yeah, I see Augustus being a southern name. I'd be glad to get stuck in a chocolate cube.

Augustus in Georgia. I don't know. That's Augusta. Is that your joke? It's close. Good? I'm sick, too. You're sick as a dog.

My fever's like 110 right now. People love bragging about their fevers. Oh, they love it. Oh, yeah. It's the best thing to do when you're sick. Is that how they're getting their jackets? They're telling you their size, and you're just assigning them based on 2X or what? Correct, basically, yeah.

Correct, basically. So if somebody wants Kyle, they'll have to do Kyle size. I mean, they can ask for that size specifically, and we can try and match it up. But, yeah, we're asking people their sizes, Polaris, and then from their orders, we can see what sizes they wear and match it up. But yeah, we're asking people their sizes, Polaris, and then from their orders we can see what sizes they were and match it up. Trent has barely plugged his do-rags in the store. Abe's going to be on his ass. What have they got to eat?

Oh, it's stickies. No, it's not. I got stickies out fast. Did you get it's not. I got Stickies'd out fast. Did you get it a lot? I got it a lot right when I moved to New York, and then it started repulsing me. They judge you so hard for the sauces that you choose. Yeah.

I was getting the grilled chicken instead of the chicken fingers, and the grilled chicken is snappy. I'm taking my credit card. What are you doing? I shut my PayPal down because I got hacked on PlayStation. I got hacked on PayPal. I got hacked on several things. I'm shutting everything down.

Your house has to be pure chaos. Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, I got to call PS2. I got to call PlayStation today and get that fixed. What's twice? I got to give PS2 a call. Yeah, dude.

What? I got to give PlayStation a call. PlayStation, let me talk to two. You've got to give PlayStation a call? Tommy was livid. I hacked my PlayStation account and I can't get into it now. Is it Lizard Squad? I don't know what that means.

Lizard Squad, when PlayStation 3 came out and everyone was getting them for Christmas, me and all my boys got PlayStation 3s or PlayStation 4s. And then this like hacking team, Lizard Squad, took down the whole network on Christmas Day. That's fucked up. It was chaos. Everyone was so mad.

And I had to like explain to my parents, I was like, we can't play because Lizard Squad fucked us. And they were like stealing everyone's money and shit too. It was pretty crazy. That's impressive. How did they breach the mainframe like that? I don't know.

I've always wanted to breach a mainframe. Yeah. It was a big breach though. You're just typing on a keyboard and saying I'm in. I'm in. Yeah. Call PlayStation right now. How do you choose one as your payment method?

Would you rather have a big mainframe that feels like a little breached or a little... I would rather have a big one that feels a little breached. Okay. A little leak. Fuck yeah. Wait, is this a website where you just type? It's called hack. It's like you just press random buttons and it makes it look like you're hacking.

Yeah. Looks like he's hacking. I'm in. TJ, how old are you? I'll be 26 in January. Oh, really? Wow. I feel like we have the same high school memories for some reason. TJ, how old are you? I'll be 26 in January. Oh, really? Wow.

I feel like we have the same high school memories for some reason. Was that a big thing in school when you were a kid? The hacking? Hacker typer? The Zip Squad thing? The hacker typer thing? Oh, I just know every website. Oh, yeah. Maybe that's it.

By the way, we have less than 50 Deion Sanders do-rags left if you guys want to sell this out real quick. Yeah, let's sell it out real quick. If you are buying Yak merch, toss a do-rags left if you guys want to sell this out real quick. Yeah, let's sell it out real quick. If you are buying Yak merch, toss a do-rag on there. Actually, somebody send us a screenshot of you using the payment plan for this. How much would that be a month? A do-rag on layaway? Act fast.

It's like an old grumpy dude sorting through his bills. Fuck. Missed a payment on the do-rag. El Perez is coming down to my house to take it. They're seizing the do-rag. Rip it off my cold, wavy hair. Trent wears his all the time off camera. He does.

He's always wearing it. He looks damn good in there. He does, actually. He does. Brandon, why don't you call PlayStation right now? Aren't their hours weird? Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. No, I will. Call them right now. Okay. TJ, can you patch us through? I gotta eat. You can't. You're on Uber E me right now. Okay. TJ, can you patch us through? I got to eat. You can't. You're on Uber Eats right now.

You're not trying to. I'm trying to. You're on Uber Eats. I disconnected my PayPal, so now I don't have anything. I can't pay for anything with my Uber Eats, so I can't order anything for lunch. Did Tommy get conned on PlayStation? I don't know how it happened. It was a guy that his dad works at Sony.

A hundred percent. He can get you a million. Yeah, GTA 6 early access. Oh, he didn't have that. He didn't know. What's the Fortnite currency? He didn't know how to sign it in. What is it?

V-Bucks. I get a lot of V-Bucks. Yeah, I bet you. V-Bucks and. Tommy might have gotten conned. Dude, I stumbled upon Ninja playing Fortnite still. He's still playing it. Yeah, yeah.

It was depressing. He looks miserable. He looks so miserable he looks furious playing that fucking game have you seen his master class no but I also fucking love he's good

he has a master class on becoming a streamer and he's just like 90% of it is about dyeing your hair blue you just gotta do something crazy like dye your hair blue people will tune in to me and be like who's this guy with the blue hair that was like his biggest do something crazy, like dye your hair blue. People will tune in to me. They'll be like, who's this guy with the blue hair? And that was his biggest advice ever is just to dye your hair blue. Yeah.

How much money do you think he made that one year when Fortnite was the biggest thing in the world? So he left Twitch for a little bit and signed with Mixer, which was like Microsoft's shot at streaming. That company failed, and they had to pay him out $30 million of his contract. Oh my God. And he was only there for like a month, right? It was a three-year contract. They paid him out in like six months. So is he playing still so often for more money

or is he just addicted to playing? Recently he like tried something completely new. He now streams on every website simultaneously. He also just started a burger chain. That was Mr. Beast, I thought. Mr. Beast, yeah. Potato, potato. I don't know.

Dobrik, Mr. Beast, and Ninjas. Same person. Ninjas way better than all those guys. Ninjas better? Dobrik has a restaurant? It's called Dobrik's Pizza. D-O-B-R-I-K-S. Okay.

We need a burger chain. What would our food be? People gotta stop doing things. Just chill and be a regular person. You know who needs to stop doing shit? Shaq. What were his career earnings? He doesn't need to be doing the general.

He doesn't need to be DJing. He's got to be fucking sleepy as hell. Yeah, but do you think he'd get to a certain point where he's like, I'm just going to do something to have a routine? I also believe he's doing what he wants to do. You think he wants to do all those commercials? I don't know. He's the Old Spice one, right?

I think people get addicted to that. He's got Old Spice. He's got Papa John's. I think he has Gold Bond, too. Yeah. He's the Old Spice one, right? I think people get addicted to that. He's got Papa John's. He has Gold Bond, too. Yeah. He's got it all. He's got to do less. He's also got the General. The General, yeah. That's not even fun. That's insurance. That shoot has to be miserable.

Dion has a lot of commercials. Yeah, what is it? Icy Hot. Dion isn't a lot. He's got Aflac, Subway. I think I just saw Dion a lot of commercials. Yeah, what is it? Icy Hot. Dion isn't a lot. Got Aflac, Subway. I think I just saw Dion on some Doritos. Yeah. Probably. We're in the office, actually, I think.

Khloe Kardashian had an ad I saw on my Instagram this morning for this. It's a headband you put around your head with a long string with a ball, and you punch the ball, and it pops up on the TV, how many punches of the ball you got. And she's like, it just seemed like an embarrassing thing to do. And it was clearly, you know, she had to write ads.

She's like, this is the most fun I've ever had in my entire life. And she's just standing in front of the TV trying to, and I, first I was like, that's lame. I would never do that. But for easy money,

I absolutely, I would do anything. I probably paid her like 45. So that's it. Yeah, that's it. And it's like her on her Instagram, but she's like, absolutely. I would do anything. Probably paid her like $45 million. So that's it? Yeah, that's it. And it's like her on her Instagram. But she's... It's like those punch balloons.

What the fuck is that? That looks like something you would do if you lived on a prairie in 1940. Yeah, it's like the same as the wheel and the hoop and the stuff. How is that a new thing? She's like, I can't imagine a Christmas holiday without my ball puncher head.

I have never had more fun in my whole life. Well, she's like a big face of flat tummy T, which is just saying that she's blowing up every bathroom that she's in. Yeah. It's like fill in that with oozing brown poop. Imagine like your parents walking in on you playing with that thing. My dad would

be pissed. I would just go over and just cut it. There she goes. There she goes. And like they were trying so hard to make it seem fun and awesome. Box balling. The best. It's so much fun. Which one is that on the bottom?

Which one is that on the bottom? It's the same one. Which Kardashian? Khloe. Very exciting. I think people's houses seem so uncozy? Right? And look at the replies.

Too damn fun. I bet that is fun. Steven, you think that one's dope? Which one is that? If you're good at it like that. That just doesn't look fun, even if you were good at it. Celebrities advertising for mobile games is hilarious. What's-his-name's doing that a lot.

The guy from Malcolm in the Middle. The guy from Scrubs is doing it a lot. Yeah. John McGinley? John C. McGinley. Look up his ad. It is the most gun to your head. I think he's doing it for a mobile game.

I don't think we can say what the brand is for this, but have you guys seen the ads that Antonio Brown is doing for that other gambling? It is bad. Another company got Antonio Brown to do gambling? The ads are horrendous. Why would they get him? He's blackout drunk in them, and he doesn't even know what he's saying. Where's Odell?

It's bad. Odell was just sleepy. Yeah, next jacket. We got our guy TJ. it's going to ryan m i thought tj bought his own jacket jackets are good jackets they're sweet it's the first piece of merch that they've ever i've ever like they were angry if you didn't give it back like they were for him to uh to get him back i gave mine away at the stadium to the guy who's doing the flips at halftime the little tumblr t-shirt shooter guy was looking at the rack he's like

these are awesome i didn't know they were i didn't know we weren't supposed to i was like take one it says kate yeah i gave a dozen jersey away once and I got detention. You're getting in trouble for that quick. The leader in the clubhouse right now is Brandon G at $562. Big Cat's buying flights and hotel. I think that that guy is making money on this. Flights and hotel

to New York. In New York City. Several hundred dollars if not four figs. You're talking over a grand. Plus we don't want Brandon G here. Why not Brandon G? I would gladly take Brandon G. I don't know. I like him a lot. Yeah, he seems like a great guy.

His dick feels so big. It looks small, but it feels so big. It feels just... Is that a compliment you'd ever give a guy? It looks tiny, but it feels so big. I feels just. Yeah. Is that a compliment you'd ever give a guy? It looks tiny, but it feels so big. I'm not going to lie. I would kind of fuck with that. I would fuck with that.

I wouldn't. Actually, yeah, because you'd show it and just be like, just wait. Yeah. Trust me. Packs a punch. I'd still rather it look big. Yeah. But then that would be such a mind fuck.

Holy shit, your dick is tiny. To see a guy with like a hog and then be like, am I crazy? I would just gaslight to be like, you must be loose as fuck there. Your pussy looks wide open. I mean, look at my dick. It is snug as a bug. That would ruin me probably. That would destroy me.

That was like 90% of high school sex discourse. It was like the girl would be like, oh, he has a tiny dick. The guy would be like, oh, she's a whore with a loose pussy. I was like, I'm never doing this. It was so frightening. I was horrified. Girls loved outing guys. And vice versa.

I believed it. I just believed it. I was like, yeah, dude, she's loose. 17-year-old. I like believed it. I just believed it. I was like, yeah, dude, she's loose. Yeah. 17 year old. Yeah, there's so many rumors. She has the loose. And I'm like six. I'm like, yeah, she had sex. I'm weighing the numbers.

The risk reward. Not for me. I'd be so disappointed when I found out it was not her. I was going to fuck her, too. Not now. Hey, you guys. It's Johnny C. McGinley. I'm sure by now that you've heard of the puzzle game Royal Match.

It's always this ad. After having seen the ads, just like you, about a thousand times, I figured I'd give it a try. I'm sure glad I did. Honestly, I couldn't stop thinking about it once I started playing. It doesn't look good. It looks like it hurts to move his mouth. My man skipped face day.

Which is a must for me. Now it's my go-to game that I chill with at the end of the day. That's so sad. On the couch or on my favorite chair. Wait, who is this? That's Dr. Cox. I say you give it a try. It's fantastic. All the best.

Thank you, guys. You didn't even show the game either. Nope. He faced like a bottle of scotch right out. Yeah. Yeah. You know what ads look, you know what ads I always get super into are those like super, super poorly made like mob, mob.

Oh yeah. You're a level one gangster and a level 20 boss. Yeah. Fuck yeah. And like, you'll like, like a guy will go over and like pat your girl on the butt and you'll turn into like a level 70 crook and a pile of gold will appear

John Stamos is on one for a gambling site and he gets like a full house and then he like looks at the camera oh okay Stamos

that company spent $1,500 on that video the John C. McGinley one yeah why was it a cameo almost definitely and his business cameo is 1500.

Yep. Ah. God, though, he was... Regular cameo, 475? He's such a phenomenal actor, and he was amazing in Scrubs, best part of Scrubs. I can't believe he hasn't...

He was in Office Space. He was in Wall Street. He's in a lot of good shit. Is he in a lot of good shit? He's in Platoon. Is he the boss from Office Space? No, he's the guy

that comes in... So what do you say you do Space? No, he's the guy that comes in. So what do you say you do here? Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Consultant. Scrubs was such a huge show, and I guess none of them really had a ton of success outside of there. No, maybe The Janitor with the middle. The two main guys are in a commercial right now for a phone company.

And I was wondering, if you watch that, do you just think that's a gay guy commercial? Because their characters from Scrubs are two best friends that are basically gay, but they're not. Right. But a lot of people just watch this commercial and think this is a gay commercial. If they didn't see Love Actually, they will not understand that and think that. You have to see Scrubs and Love Actually. Right, to get it. You have to be really invested in the culture to get this commercial yeah yeah huh i don't see mcginley good actor

fine actor he was also in uh he signed freddie prince jr at the end of summer catch the scout for the phillies i'm glad i know that um Speaking of summer catch, I really like things that are fresh. Oh, nice. Fresh summer caught. Cotton? Fish. Caught fish. Quality is HelloFresh's priority. Ingredients travel from the farm to your home in less than seven days,

so you know they're fresh. Busy days and late nights call for more flexibility. That's why HelloFresh has plans that work with your schedule. You can change your preferences, delivery day day and address in just a few clicks go to hellofresh.com slash yak 70 and use code yak 70 for 70 off plus free shipping that's 70 off with code yak 70 at hellofresh.com slash yak 70 70. All right. Oh, yeah. Oh, we got another jacket. Oh, we got another jacket. Dylan J. Dylan J.

It's getting Jake, Jake Marsh. Nice. There you go. Dylan J. Dylan J. There's also this large Yak jersey. These are sweet. I actually felt sad to let this one go.

This is a good at the beach. I pretended I couldn't find mine, so I could keep it. Really? I gave mine away. I thought it would be a cool moment. This guy 10X'd me, and I threw my jersey up, and he didn't give a fuck. I said, all right. What do you want me to do?

I had an issue with a Yak fan or a Barstool fan at the event. I went to the bathroom. Me and my wife went to the bathroom, and I said, Oh, all right, all right. I'm going to, I'm going to, I'm going to. I gave the guy a Barstool hat, and I said, hey, save my seat so when we get back we can sit here. And I got back, and he didn't save my seat, which was fine.

Okay, he gave my seat up, but then he wouldn't give the hat back. Oh, that's big fuck you. I wanted to fight him. He was a big boy. But he wouldn't give me the hat back. He was a big fat pussy. Was he, like, joking around about it? At first he was.

Then he realized I wanted the hat back. He didn't save my seat. He didn't save the seat. He didn't save my seat. And you needed your seat to be saved because it was slammed. Well, I needed the seat where it was right behind the Mississippi State bench, and I wanted to be right behind the Mississippi State bench, and he gave my seats away right behind the Mississippi State bench.

Couldn't you just be like, oof? I ended up sitting two seats away, but I wanted those seats. He didn't save those seats. And I gave him a free hat for the seats. I gave him basically. I alphied you. I traded him something. hat for the seats. I gave him basically traded him something. In front of your wife no less. I would have dropped his ass. I would have dropped his ass too.

You're lucky it wasn't me with your wife. You're lucky it wasn't me with your wife either. I would have fucking stomped his head in. I would have drug him out in the middle of the court. Made a mockery of him. Because I don't fuck around.

But that's just me, I guess. That would be like the most demeaning thing to do. Just like drag him out on the court, kick his ass, and like throw him up in the hoop. Oh, boy. Well? What? What? What are we going to do? You've got to call PlayStation.

Yeah, we do have to call PlayStation. Still got to do that? Yeah. And ask to speak to two. Yeah. You should call it so your PlayStation 2 got hacked. What did you have to have for PlayStation to get online? A multi-tap? No, PlayStation 2, you put the Ethernet cable right in. I think you had to? A multi-tap? No, PlayStation 2, you just had them, you put the Ethernet cable

right in it. I think you had to have a multi-tap. PlayStation 2 online came out during, well, it was already released. You had to send your PS2 away to get network adapter

installed on it. What about a next gen, like a second gen PS2? Didn't they have Slims? Slims might have had it. I think they had the, yeah. But if you had a fat PS2,

you had to get it sent away. I remember when the Game Boy, they had like the multiplayer, but you had to have a wire and you had to get it sent away. I remember when the Game Boy, they had the multiplayer, but you had to have a wire. Link cable. Yeah. You remember that? Because that was when I was six.

Yeah, no, I had a Game Boy. Like a square one? Yeah. Really? Yeah, red. But it was like I got it from someone, like one of my friend's older siblings gave it to me. I remember playing Atari in my neighbor's basement.

Unironically, they just still had it hooked up and had all the games out, and we just really loved playing Atari. No, I had an NES, which was like I was probably too old, but that was my first game system. Everything I had was from... Every toy I had was a hand-me-down from my older cousins. And my aunt is the heaviest cigarette smoker. Everything had a bit of a tint to it. I thought stormtroopers were yellow.

And so I saw the Phantom Menace. We were talking about growing up at my grandmom's house, like everyone smoked inside. All my aunts and uncles were just sitting there after. I remember I accidentally flipped an ashtray over on myself once when I was playing in the living room. They're like die. I was like, yeah, I think that's why I don't like Italian food. I just assume it tastes like cigarettes. What happened, Brandon?

It's like manicottis taste like parliaments. PlayStation said we're experiencing extremely high call volume right now and can't provide voice support. Call back later. I think you need to ask Tommy if he got conned. He might have. It doesn't matter what happened to him now. You got to make sure it doesn't happen again.

True. Or go get him an Xbox. Or play with my boy Stinky Tony. I bought him a PlayStation 5 Friday. Oh, it got hacked when? He doesn't know I have the PS5 yet. It's up in the closet. He's not listening.

He's going to find out. He doesn't listen to the show. We're going to DM him. Hold on, Hold on. Tommy, the other day, was home all day, and he came up to me and said, Dad, I just watched Tommy Walker Day again, and I read the comments, and they love me. Do not read the comments, Tommy.

Don't ever read the comments. And he was like, why? They were good. I said, well, okay, well, that's actually a good point. They're good. Go ahead and read them, I guess. But he loves going back and watching Tommy Walker Day. How could you not? I said, well, okay, well, that's actually good. Good point. They're good. Go ahead and read them, I guess. But he loves going back and watching Tommy Walker Day.

How could you not? I enjoy hearing that. Yeah. That's awesome. How old is he now? He's 12 now. So now I talk about him like he's a kid, but he's 12. A man.

He's basically a man. He's a Mississippi man. His mullet is long. Yeah, I'm getting worried about it. What? I should step in now. What are you getting worried about? I should step in and say, you need to get a haircut. No.

No. We're just going to let it grow? Yes. We're all parenting the guy right now. We're just going to let it grow? Why not? How long are we going to let it go? As long as he wants.

What if he has to get a job? Yes. Like 13. Yeah. I had my first job at 14, and I have never not get a job? Yes. Like 13. Yeah. I had my first job at 14, and I have never not had a job since. My first job was 16. Well, I have 15, if you count umpire. I would always find ways to get paid.

Like what? Like what? You would sell gum? You selling gum in high school? You were one of those entrepreneur dickheads. I would watch Donovan Strain, Buttery Ass Mondays. He would do little hustle tactics on YouTube,

and I wanted to be him. So I'd buy a bunch of juice from the dollar store. Yeah. But there was no hustle to it. I would just sell it. I didn't care about the money. I just wanted the attention. Sell it for one for one swap?

I had unlimited Starbursts from my uncle. Yeah, that's what it was. Starburst Skittles, Sour Patch Kids. You had a trunk full. Then I felt so much more joy just giving it away for free. When you're in high school, I didn't

really need money like that. Just gas money. Your uncle was a Starbucks plug? Mm-hmm. You were selling it in high school? I assumed this was like elementary school. No. Why didn't they just go to the store and buy candy?

When you're stuck in school for seven hours, that was like the hottest commodity. Everybody was selling everything. We had a school store and the fruit snacks were gold. Yeah, but then they stopped selling them. The Starburst and Skittles, that's an upper tier.

Right, but you could get to that upper tier without going through you if you befriended a teacher in the basement, like a shop or a welding teacher. Yeah. Big Texas cinnamon rolls. They would tell you Big Texas. There was a Big Texas cinnamon roll speakeasy

in the basement of our... I remember being torturously hungry in school. Oh, yeah. Eating up to lunch. I didn't know it was possible. My stomach would be growling so loud. I was tired all the time and just a bottomless pit of hunger.

The first two people. Whoa, Kent N? Holy shit. $8.79. Okay. He bought 30 yak spinners. Oh, shut up. That might be dangerous.

Yes, he's flipping them. What is he building? He's in high school and he's going to sell these out. He's going to flip them, yeah. Oh. When I was in high school and he's going to sell these out. He's going to flip them, yeah. When I was in high school, we had cookies. They would sell cookies at lunch, but they would make the special needs kids make the cookies. Did that for you guys too?

No, my homeroom would be like every kid had a different homeroom, and my homeroom was in the special needs room. And it was called the donut room. And our special needs kids, there was a donut conveyor belt, and every morning they'd make donuts for the school. Real big donuts. Just donuts in the school? Yeah, it was a donut conveyor belt in my homeroom. It was right next to the daycare in my high school.

Does it smell great in there? I love that. Whoa, Brian! Jesus, Brian! Holy shit! What do we got? Damn. $7.89. Does he smell great in there? Whoa, Brian! Jesus, Brian! Holy shit! Damn! $7.89. Does he not have a last name? What'd he buy? That's the original Brian. TJ, you should tell us

what it is. Damn! Oh! Jesus Christ. Something must have happened. Damn, Al. Nope. This is my guy, Sam. He actually bets with Trust the Date a lot. No way. Che, lay out what they get. They get a free flight to New York City, a free hotel. Free round-trip flight, hotel.

Be part of the act. Watch it in the booth. You'll get to obviously talk and interact on the act. So this guy's awesome. On top of that, they also spent $1,000, so they either get to go to a pizza review, an internship, an R&R, Army, Navy, or the Arizona Bowl. And do they get all of the below perks?

I don't know. Those sold well in high school too. And perks. Oh, yes. God, yeah. Oh, my God. Perks was a huge deal. That was...

People never did perks. I was so ignorant to the opioid epidemic. Yeah. Just didn't know what it was. It was so normalized that I was just like... Yeah, yeah.

People would talk about doing pills all the time. Yeah, I was just like, oh, that's funny. Yeah. epidemic yeah just didn't know what it was it was so normalized that i was yeah yeah that you want to talk about doing pills all the time yeah i was just like oh that's funny yeah the shit like i remember getting vicodin for um like like dental surgery and i thought it would be cool to like who wants something like people the beans like i was like oh you really want this just have it i thought i was just like i thought when i got my wisdom teeth taken out, it made me like more handsome because everybody was coming up to me like, hey, man, like what's going on? I was like, a wake up call.

Yeah, people really want this. In college, I broke ribs in my back and like I broke, I was always breaking shit. And immediately all the rugby guys would come out of the woodwork and be like, hey, how you doing? And I was like, it must be me. Yeah. They're thinking of of me and then they'd be like by the way you got any bikes ah dude i don't know dude they were like freshmen and they were just like nodding off and they were just everybody was like dude he's off a fucking bean right yeah oh no it was so normal yeah so normal that's what was like that was like at my school but it was a xanax instead yeah

and like kids would be like walking to their cars to drive home like falling over. Yeah. Dude, I used to pretend I would like squint my eyes and just like I wanted to be a stoner so bad.

Yeah. I did too. And I hated weed. Oh, I hated it. I would smoke and just freak out. Yep. And then be with my friends

and be like, dude, I am so fucking stoned right now. I remember it was like 11th grade homecoming or something we all went to somebody's house and I didn't smoke a ton but normally it was like with my close group of friends and it was a

party with like some of the more popular kids and I smoked and whatever it was I couldn't stop laughing like hysterical laughing like over the top like someone's losing their mind laughing I couldn't stop I don't know I was probably laced with something. And I just remember looking around.

Just go. No, it never is. It was weird. I remember everyone, like, you know when your view's kind of foggy looking around and everyone just being like, and it was like a nightmare that I couldn't get out of, that I couldn't stop laughing. That's the only time that smoking weed is fun when that happens, in my opinion. It would have been fun if everyone else was on the same page as me, but nobody was. It was just me.

And it's like, what the fuck? I couldn't look people in the eyes at school the next week. Last time I smoked weed was probably a year ago. And I smoked a joint by myself in our apartment. And my plan was to smoke a joint and then go for a walk outside. And I went outside to the living room, and Owen had, like, 20 people over. And they were all, like, sitting down watching something.

And I just stood there, and I was like, going to the store. And then I just disappeared for, like, four hours. I remember Owen telling it from his perspective. Yeah, he was like, dude, like, we were all, like, super confused. Yeah. First time I ever smoked weed, I was at the, uh... My friend friend Vincent Gu

he's a 7 foot Asian guy he's super tall he was hilarious though he played the cross and he was the biggest guy but he had like a two letter last name so it was like this big on his jersey but his drug dealer was a Harry Krishna hey boys

and I smoked weed at the Palace of Gold with the Krishnas. That was the first time I smoked. Boys, come in. Hey, fellas. Hello, hello. How you doing? That was nice. That's a hearty hug.

That is a hearty hug. Fellas. What's up, Willie? Here we go. Good to see you. Good to see you. These guys are trouble. Hello, sir. sir Taylor what's up

Will when was the last time you were on the yak It's been a while Yeah What was the last time you were on the yak Take a sit down Come on in Welcome boys Yeah

So Taylor have you seen his dick in person i have and is it no honestly will's penis is it's very handsome okay yeah it's like uh you've seen me in a couple it's like a small like you go to a small town and there's like a lot of beautiful things to see but like not a huge population right okay so so. So there's charm. Yeah, like a clock tower. Yeah. Yeah, one time in Michigan. We were peeing at the urinal. Yeah, and I peaked over.

Peeked over and I saw it and I go, hey, good for you. He took a photo. Yeah, I did. It's my screensaver. Would you rather your dick look big and feel small when it's in use or look small and feel real big? Feel small for who?

The partner. Look big and feel small. Yeah feel yeah for sure that's the only right answer when you pose that hypothetical you're talking about it feel like it feels real big to the receiver I thought you talking about just to you no no no sometimes it oh no I get it sometimes it feels like top-heavy yeah feel small I mean that's it seems like a personal problem like if you look good in the mirror, you're like... It feels good on you when you're walking around and you start complimenting strangers. When you're having a good dick day? Yeah.

I started initiating small talk. Really? Yeah. So small talk when you have a big dick day? I've never felt that, but I think I do. I know. I think I have big balls. I think that's why. I think I've got a big old set of balls I do. I know. I think I have big balls. I think that's why.

I think I've got a big old set of balls on me. That's right. Do you have a huge sack? I think I have a huge sack, yeah. I pee on my balls constantly. What? I brought that up to people. Dude, mine are small, but they hang super low.

Mine are hanging. That's why. Okay. And I'm always pissing on my balls. And I brought this up to people, and everyone was like, I've never done that. And I was like, that happens to me like three times a day. Taylor's got this buddy that has such a massive ball sack. He brought me to the side.

He took me aside too. Boys, I'm sorry. You're about not one-upped. No, bro. No. Maybe. Maybe you guys are the same. He stretched it out of his shorts like it was a bat wing.

I haven't met my boy Sweet Potato Pat. This thing is this big. Sweet Potato Pat. One ball. Before he continues, give it a size comparison to another object. Yeah, what he was just showing right there. I'm telling you, he's flipping a pizza, dude. I promise.

We pull up the reactions to Sweet Potato Pat. We have him come in every once in a while and just show his nut. You have a picture of it, right? Yeah, but the picture, you need to see it. It's like seeing the Great Wall of China. You can see it in comparison, yeah. Oh, okay, I'm sure it's beautiful. Like jaw-dropping.

We were like, what? Really? Should we get Tanner on FaceTime right now and be like, hey, show us. You want me to call him? Show us your nut on FaceTime? Are we doing a nut-off? Stephen, drop a name real quick. So my boy is a chemist, and I think how he got it is I think he fell into it.

Who is a chemist? I didn't know that was an actual profession. He's a potato pat. He's a chemist? Yeah. So my boy is a chemist, and I think how he got it is I think he fell into a sort of used. Who is a chemist? I didn't know that was like an actual profession. Who's a potato pat? He's a chemist? Yeah. Does he do with like Bunsen burners? I think Bunsen burners and test tubes, dude. But I think that's how his nut got so big.

I think he fell into a vat, as you would. Or a cauldron. God, it's good to see you guys. I'm glad you guys are here. Oh my gosh. I thought I was going to miss him. I hear my boy coming in showing his nut. Wait, KB, move your...

KB, you got to move. So we just have people react to his nut. Is he here? Is he in the building? No, he doesn't work here. Oh, my God. Did we see the photo? Okay.

This goes around. It's like a Craigslist ad. This goes around and shows you his nut and leaves. I found him on Facebook Marketplace that is incredible I hate to take the show here but I'd like to hear more about this case race

and kind of how everything went I saw the videos but Will that's a big pivot last time you were here you were on the case race and I see you guys hug and it seems like it went really well

well Nick was my we were partners I usually have about two beers. I don't know if there's a name for what you call that, and I get drunk off of that. Will reverted, I was back in high school, man, and he was just in my face, drink pussy, drink pussy. Don't you fucking.

Good for you, good for you. I had 11 in like 40 minutes. Honestly, Nick, we won that case race. Yeah, we did. Like Shane, we were up one and had one to go. Yeah. And Shane just down two, which was against the rules. But at that point, like...

Cut the riffing. Shane had already been ready to swing on Shane. Yeah. Everybody was... That's true. KB had a bad vibe kind of coming into the race. So Kyle doesn't like beer. You were going through some apartment issues, though.

He was homeless and you don't like beer so you had a bottle of Pink Whitney beforehand. So yeah, I was like, I'm not, because the first time I was just sober

because I can't really drink beer so two total heavy stomachs so I pre-gamed it with like a, like a whole bottle. Just came in with that anger. Pink Whitney. Yeah.

Yeah. Why can't you chug to slam two beers? You have to, what do they call it? There's a riff rule. Riff, you have to riff two beers you have to what do they call what's the there's a riff rule riff you have to

so you have to maintain conversation while drinking you can't you can't converse while chugging you can't just sit there and chug one

well how many did you drink I mean I was up there 12 oh yeah because we had one left so you kept up with him yeah

I think you were on the 13th I was never going to get to the spot where you know if i was putting one down i'm looking over at my boy yeah hey hey hey i know you're i know you're loving the conversation focus yeah like rome because rome had what four yeah maybe four maybe spilling everywhere and then i ran out to puke so much and i had that alien face paint and you know you get the cold sweats

and so like it all just blended together have you ever been blackout drunk and puked and then look at yourself and you're black what an experience that is I was like did I get that fucked up I'm black I do remember I lost my vape and then I went to the bodega and I came back

and I realized I was still in full face paint so you went to the bodega and I came back and I realized I was still in full face. So you went to the bodega as the Joker with green hair. You guys were out late. Like a random Wednesday night. Yeah, you guys were out until like 4am. I came out of my blackout and I was in my bed and the show was still going on.

That was tough. Because I remember when I went out to get my vape, you went out with me and then you left. I must have. I was trying to get my vape, you went out with me and then you left. I must have. And I was trying to. We had been on the phone for a second. And then I literally wake up at like 5 in the morning, full face paint, fully clothed, laying on my bed. And I have missed calls from Sasquatch and Shane.

I'm like, damn, I missed a good time. I don't think you missed a good time at all. Those are the situations where it's like you have to intentionally just go to bed. Yeah. You're forcing it. You're forcing it at that point. The repercussions of that, though, like that was probably one of our most viewed shows. I went on a family vacation with my mom, my dad, and my sister. We went to P-Town, which is a very gay area of the Cape.

And we were walking around. These two dudes walked past holding hands on the beach. And one was like, yo, Nick, that case race. I was like, God. In front of my family yeah i remember that night before the day it came out i was going to i was walking to the stand and like people were stopping me being like yo i haven't watched yet but i'm so pumped people were so pumped no i was like coming out of the woodwork well did you have because i was in the group chat i wasn't part of it but you you guys had the scaries before it came out.

They had so much anxiety. Were you also really like, fuck? Yeah, I had the scaries for sure. Whenever I saw that my pants were down and everything else, and then I literally wake up and I have a text message from JJ Reddick talking about how small my piece is, and I'm like, what the fuck? How do you know about that? He's like, oh, I got sources on the inside.

I didn't think it looked small. And that was from Big Cat. He heard it from Big Cat. So Big Cat was a little loose lip during the whole thing. I think it's because your ass looks so big. Oh, I don't even want to see, dude. Oh, I can't even. Oh, Will.

Oh, I can't walk. With a knee sleeve. I think I was trying to show people my... It doesn't, it looks aerodynamic for sure. It's an agile cock. And then I kept trying to show people my... It doesn't... It looks aerodynamic for sure. It's an agile cock. And then I kept trying to like walk out. This was the worst day of my life. You should see the videos.

And I had the scaries. Like, wait a minute. How many views does this have? Like 500,000. Half a mil. Half a mil. And then just play... Oh, there's...

What's going on? Oh, dude. And play... Like, this shit's like two hours long. Like, this shit's, like, two hours long. Like, how do you watch this? Four hours long. This was an hour and 30 minutes. I attempted to fast forward to some parts, and I just couldn't.

I was like, man, I don't even. Unlistenable. I was riveted. It was like watching a social experiment. Hey, what's going on? It sucks, too, because, like, people, like, plan to, like, people, like, get together with their friends to, like, drink along with it. Like, do a case ratio.

Yeah, people told me that. Yeah, and then they're like, what the fuck is this? We got to redeem ourselves. Yeah, yeah. I think we have to. I'm taking it easy, though. That's what you said last time. No, no, no.

Last time I was like, I'm going to drink 30 beers. This time I'm going in like- Shane came in with the presence that I feel like it put everybody- I mean, I took an Addy with you. I took half an Addy with you. That's right. Like, okay, is this going to help? Like, okay, let's going to help? Like,

okay, let's do it. Dude, yeah, we were, we were, we acted like it was the fucking, it was the ACT's.

Yeah. We were up all night prepping. Dude, we're talking about our strategy, and like, I got a tutor. Just like, you know,

he's got that mystique about him, like, oh, this is the dude who drinks beer. So he's the funniest guy in the room, and the best drinker, and it just made us all pissed. It sucked,

dude. Yeah. That was brutal. Because he's tough to keep up with. Like, he'll shit on you and joke on you, and you're like, fuck, I feel stupid right now. Yeah. You want to get one in, huh? You can really drink like that?

Yeah. Oh, yeah, bro. You guys were about to win, and he put down, like, five. Yeah. Yeah. They were, like, one away, and he put down, like, five. Like a robot. He was like, don't worry about it, Ron.

And then he just hammered to it. That's cheating. Yeah, but at that point, we're all so like, it was over. We were all, everyone was. The riffing rule really only ever applied to Dana, because he was just sitting in silence. Didn't say a word. He drank 18 beers by himself.

Yeah. He was on a team alone. Taylor, how would you do? You know, that's a good question. Case race, 12 beers, each person? Yeah. What was the best time? I think it was like 56 minutes.

I don't know if I could do 56. This is riffing. I don't know. Even without riffing, I don't think I can do 56 minutes. Remember, I came back and I was like, oh, it's not like a straight up competition case race. It's like a social event. I guess there's only one way to find out, to be honest with you.

I don't know. I think you have to partake. I had a massive amount of FOMO when I was watching that video. It seemed like you guys had an incredible time. Nope. No. No, no, no. It's tough with the scary zone because I've been in that position where all the lights are off and that next morning you're like writing freehand poetry just wondering what you've done with your life like it's a tough people forget

it was my 30th birthday i was dealing with my mortality i had a cake in front of me just getting berated shane shane was texting every day just had the scarcer probably a week or two yeah and that made me feel better i i When I went to the stand that night, he was at the stand too, and some guy came up to us. He's like, yo, you see Shane's over there?

He's like, did you guys squash the beef? I was like, dude, what are you talking about? It was, I mean, just like,

I still get DMs being like, you ruined the case race. Yeah. People will come up and be like, dude, that was awesome on the case race. That's crazy.

Case race was awesome. Because you were good. You came out the best by far. I know. Waste up, yeah. Yeah. People liked your vibes. Waste up, man.

You were great. Dude's coming up to me in the airport washing their hands and necks and being like, hey, solid. That case race was awesome. That's another rant. Thanks, man. The airport. Like, the bathrooms?

Is this like a Seinfeld joke? No. That's the thing about airport bathrooms. Oh, just like any bathrooms. The stalls, 20% of the time they work. It's closed. You can see under it and through the crack. What about the sinks where you have to press with one hand to keep it going? Yeah. Then you only can do one hand. Yeah. What about the sinks where you have to press with one hand to keep it going?

Yeah. Then you only can do one hand. Yeah. Especially when you're up in the air, like on the plane, you have to press for the water. I'm talking about just public bathrooms. They suck. The pressing sink thing is a tough deal.

Whoever set the timer, whoever was there, I was like, hey, six seconds is the move. You need a good 15 seconds to get those hands really lathered up. Even if it works. That's true. Do you ever try and like, try and make content with the people, or try and make eye contact

with the people through the crack? No. Is the one on the toilet or the one outside? I think that's a good question. I more so feel safer when I'm on the toilet and I'm like, who's trying to peep? Yeah. I only stare through the cracks

so just if they catch me. But that is ridiculous that you can see them through the crack. Yeah, it is. I had such a bad shit. I was coming home from Austin and I had the worst diarrhea of my life. It was so bad that I went to the bathroom

and I was like, I know this is going to be outrageously loud that I had to put my headphones in and put on a noise canceling and just like just be like I don't know if anyone's in here there's probably people in here but I just got to go for it because usually I try and like wait it out until there's no one in there and then release but this was like there was no time so if you get, here's a tip for you. So if you get a loud enough, the boy. So if you get a loud enough toilet. Hey, hey, hey. Taylor, you don't get embarrassed by Georgia like you did last year. Everything is depending on it.

We had the conversation. I know. All right, we'll have it. I'm going to go to the college football show. I'll talk to you after, but don't, don't. If you want us on the college football show to talk about it, I'm more than willing to the college football show. I'll talk to you after, but don't. Don't. If you want us on the college football show to talk about it, I'm more than willing to bear the cross of Michigan. The shirts that said, like, you know, blocking crew coming through.

Remember that? Yeah. Listen, this is— I'm riding on the Big Ten. The University of Michigan is representing the entire Big Ten. They are going to win the national championship. How about this guy thinking he hit a home run with Matt Ruhle and Luke Fickle right on his fucking face dude the fickle no one even knows matt rule

even matt rules the best hire give matt rule three to four years he's gonna have nebraska in tip-top shape but i do believe photoshop yourself looking skinnier as your press release you've already lost oh that's a that's a shot that's not even meant for me like i own it i own it i own it you've really really dove into that bit it's not even meant for me. Own it. Coach Rule could be taking it. I own it. I own it. I own it. You really, really dove into that bit. It's not a bit. Okay.

How long have you been doing that? About three weeks. Look good, right? Yeah. You look great. Yeah, right. Exactly. So you think that photo was Photoshopped?

Yes. On his profile picture on Twitter? Yeah. Pull up the Matt Rule photo. That's a crazy accusation. Oh, my God. It does look like a bad Photoshop deal. I think I know. The one is his profile picture on Twitter? Yeah. Pull up the Matt Rule photo. That's a crazy accusation on my guy. It does look like a bad Photoshop deal. I think I know the one is his profile picture on Twitter.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, no, the one that announced his hire. Also, is he your guy or is Scott Frost your guy? Matt Rule. Okay. Scott Frost is like, you know, he's just like one of my guys. Like, he's not the coach anymore, so he's just like my boy.

You wanted Luke Fickle. No, no, no, no, no. We're rolling Matt Rule, brother. We made the right hire. You think that's Photoshop? Yes. He's so, come on. He looks great.

He's been working out, you can tell. Yeah. He spits on himself. Show the video of him spitting on himself. He doesn't spit on themselves. But he did it on TV, which sucked. We'll talk. I love the hire.

I love the hire. I'm looking at the college football show. I'm excited for you guys to see the Big Ten. The Big Ten West is coming back. TV, which sucked. We'll talk. I love the hire. I love the hire. I'm looking at the college football show. I'm excited for you guys to see the Big Ten. Great to see you guys. The Big Ten West is coming back. Yes, big time. Right in time for them to not have divisions anymore. Correct. Yeah.

I hope that does end. But what I was saying, Sass, was if you happen to find a toilet that's loud enough, the trick is- Right back into it. The trick is, right when you're about to explode, you flush and right as it starts flushing, you start exploding because you're not going to. That is what this was. No trick.

Have the shoulder mobility for that. This wasn't. Also, the airport has the auto. Everyone has tried that. That's the only move you can try. Yeah, but he says he tries to wait on them all to leave. Like if you're about to burst. That's because the flush isn't good.

It's not going to. She's young. How old are you, Seth? Dude, we might put him on game. That's because the flesh isn't good. It's not going to... She's young. How old are you, Seth? That's what, dude, this was loud to the point that, like, gunshots wouldn't have... Well, no, you just need

to spread your cheeks enough to where it makes no sound. And I don't use... I don't use the toilet rim. I use the piss rim when I shit. So it spreads me out way further.

No, dude, because when you fart into a toilet... That's a thing, so it's an explosion. Yeah, but you can harmonize a fart. You can squeeze a little bit out and let it start doing the... You can do that.

That sounded just like it. Right? It does. It sounds like it. It feels like it. If he has diarrhea, that's dumb. It was like... Sputter, like an old jalopy.

That's what it sounds like. Those diarrhea's like, you gotta get up after you get done wiping. You gotta lift the toilet seat and clean the bottom of it. No. Whoa. What the hell are you talking about? What? At home.

You guys never murdered a toilet like that? You're cleaning the toilet seat? You're cleaning a public bathroom? No, no, no, no. I'm just talking like that's a symptom of diarrhea, right? No, no, no, no. I'm just talking like that's a symptom of diarrhea, right? Like you guys know. No.

I don't get recoiled. What's the water for? Underneath the rim? You must have a hole where everything settles and then you get like spackle around like a Jackson Pollock painting. I'm not saying I clean the airport.

I'm not saying I clean public bathrooms. What I'm saying is this. When you have diarrhea it's such an explosion that it goes sideways and you would be able to see your shit if you lift it up the room you must have you have a high asshole yeah oh no he doesn't i clean r2 what he doesn't have a high ass only fan see yeah i believe you but oh you have a powerful asshole yeah i mean it does some damage 90 of my shits are emergencies i hold till the last you don't you don't have like a like eight o'clock every day tell them your high school that you never never went to a high school bathroom i held it

i never went into my mom and dad worked so one time i i went home when i had to shit i played sick and i had to call my beautician l Lisa, to come pick me up. Really? I could give her a call. She was my ride or die. I was the exact opposite. I would honestly go in the bathroom in high school and take myself out. Really? Absolutely. Horny 15-year-old Taylor?

Wait, wait, wait. You're talking about tugging down the bathroom? Oh, yeah. You tugged in high school? Are you serious? There's no question. I'm not even shying away from that. Absolutely.

Dude, I know you were the worst kid to see in the bathroom. Oh, yeah. I don't think people knew. I really don't think people knew. I was quiet. There was not a lot of noises going on. I was there for business. Being behind you at the water fountain would suck, too.

I know you skipped that. Yeah, that one-two skip a few of you did not play with me, dude. I did not do that. How are you tugging in the school bathroom? Like, dry? Yeah, what are we doing here? Buddy, I didn't did not do that. How are you tugging in the school bathroom? Like, dry? Yeah, what are we doing here? Buddy, I didn't even really learn that, like, lotion was a thing.

Buddy, we talk about this all the time on our podcast. I mean, Che, this is your topic. When I was, like, nine or ten years old, and I'll bring this back to the bathroom part, but when I was, like,

nine or ten years old, like, you start getting horny and you start, like, getting boners. They're not much boners. I was probably 12. Okay, well, just say 12 then. Fourth grade, 10. Yeah, oh, wow. Fourth grade so that's because you guys are like athletes yeah right

testosterone just like i still haven't fully hit puberty yet it's not really so like 9 10 years old whatever it was i literally would take shoe boxes you know like old shoe boxes you put your fingers in the holes oh dude that's it up and I would try to fuck the shoebox. Really? Yes. And I literally would do it for... I'm like, this is sex? Like, this is really...

Because you don't know. There is no situation where that's the best option. No, it would be... That's always the seventh best. How are you... I remember being like a horny kid. I remember being...

I would go so many freedoms before a shoebox. I would fuck the crevice. No, no, no no it was uh you know when you went to like what leather no

I would fuck the crevice no hey listen you're not alone in that in between the cushions you're not alone I remember being on the bus going home and two kids were talking about

I'm being dead serious like jerking off and like making themselves come I used to google can you make yourself come can you do that so there was a website called jerkin world that can you make yourself come? Can you do that? So there was a website called Jerkin' World

that gave you jerk-off tactics. No way. You guys don't remember jerk-off? No. Titsandescalore.com. Yeah, beaver.com was mine, dude. You guys needed tactics? It was so primitive for me.

I just knew what... I agree. I'm like, how do you look at a shoebox and not try and soften the blow at them hard edges? But the thing is, there's way... I think it was not big enough.

It wouldn't even touch the sides. I bet you in an arm's length. I thought that was sexy. Oh, I'm just fucking. Way better things. Those things for Chuck E. Cheese you could win. The water tubes that you couldn't hold on to. They were slippery.

Yeah, that was good. A crown royal bag was amazing. Put that thing in the microwave for 10, 15 seconds. I would fuck one of those things today. For sure. That's an OG farce. That might feel better than puss. The crown royal bag was my favorite.

I would tap on the crown royal bag. One of those purple, you know, the... Oh my god. Wait, what? What? What do you do with it?

You know what I'm talking about. You would tighten the string around your... No. It's like your dick's a political prisoner, dude. The feeling of that about. You would tighten the string around your... No, I wouldn't tighten... It's like your dick's a political prisoner, dude. The feeling of that material. You just rub it on velvet?

You ever hit the... Velvet's velvet. I don't know. It's like walking on marble. You don't know what velvet is. You're not thinking. Yeah, but when I discovered velvet, it was a wrap.

You ever hit the campfire? It was a wrap. Hit the campfire? Oh, you go like this? Yeah, on the old boy? I don't know. Well, that sounds weird. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

When I used to jerk off, I would go like this. Like four times in a session. Jay said in high school, he got hard every period. Those. Buy them. Yeah. Those really are. 20% off.

Black Friday sale. I wish I knew now. Back then, dude. I wish I knew. Look at that. It's telling you. 4.5 inches Look at that. It's telling you. 4.5 inches? That's why it's telling you.

In the military, the guys called them field expedient pocket pussies and they would take, you know, the big, we wore big long green socks. You roll the sock,

you know, a rolled sock has a hole. You put a plastic bag in it. You put lotion in a condom and you put it in the sock hole and then the guys would fuck them. Yeah, I tried to do that. The jerking world

called that a fee fee. Oh, fee fee, okay. Jerking world. I guess in prison they do them too. The first Yeah, I tried to do that. Jerking World called that a fee-fee. Oh, fee-fee, okay. I guess in prison they do them too. I think I've told this before, but the first time I ever jerked off, I didn't know there was anything weird about it, so I was just posted up in my room with my door wide open. That is insane to me.

My mom was in the room next to me. That is hilarious. That's just shame. That's a natural thing. I can't comprehend you. Oh, those things would catch hands. He didn't really do

closed doors. I get really excited. I think those are sexy. Like, those are like a sexy object. The way it's held up like that? Yeah. That thing's asking for it.

That thing is talking crazy right now. I used to also... I used to jerk off with... I didn't... I wasn't a lotion person I didn't know that was a thing so I would use the hand soap

that we had in our bathroom you gotta learn the hard way with that rewind you thought it was normal to jack off in front of your mom I wasn't in front of my mom

the door was open and she was next door I read all these parenting books and a lot of kids just start doing it like in the living room in front of their family and like so that

you're supposed to say like safe adults don't want to see that. Just go to your room and do it. What? Yeah, you're supposed to be like just go to your room. Safe adults don't want to see that. I'm using that. Yeah, safe adults don't want to see that. Go to your room.

How do you not know? How are you? Aren't you? I didn't know about lotion until I went to college. They said. I don't know about lotion until you got to college. I was using soap and I'd wake up and there would be a glaze over my dick. And I got like

a nasty yeast infection. Will must have used your mom's anti-aging washing it off. But I got into my mom's lotions a few times to be nice.

First time I ever did I just peed. I thought that was That was busting. The boys told me about this let me try it and then you just start peeing before you get in the shower.

It's so funny. I didn't bust until like 9th grade I don't think. I busted 9, the boys told me about this. Let me try it. And then you just start peeing before you get in the shower. It's so funny. I didn't bust until like ninth grade, I don't think. I busted ninth. That was my first bust. I remember my friends being like talking about busts. It was a very late bloomer. I was 13. What were you, Kyle?

All over my mom's keyboard. Yeah. Probably eighth grade. Really? What were you, Will? I mean, I'm thinking fifth. What? Yeah, no, that's great.

I was late. I was late. I mean, you get the video in sixth grade, the educational video. You're walking in the halls with the pin up against your waistline. I didn't know you could nut literally until I was 12 years old. And I would just give myself blue balls for hours. No, I would jerk off, but I was shooting blanks is what I mean. What do you mean shooting blanks?

You would still get the feeling of like, I just came? Yeah, just nothing would come out. Really? Yeah. Oh yeah, that was... That sounds like Roman. That's what I meant when I said the first time

I saw him. Yeah, it sounds like... The first time he's like air just came out and we were like what the fuck are you talking about? I used Icy Hot one time and that was like

the worst mistake I've ever made in my entire life. And I legit, I was 25 years old. I thought I was changing the game. I looked at it. I was 25. Yeah. That's I was changing the game. I looked at it. I was 25. Yeah.

That's insane. Because Trojan had it. Dude, I started off and it started phenomenal. Fire and ice. And then all of a sudden. It was fire and ice. I remember in high school. That was Delta Blue.

Girls, put Altoids in your mouth if you like, you know, go to give a blowjob. It'll be like super cold and minty. And turns out, no. Oh. It burns. It burns them. Burns a guy. Yeah.

When you use soap and turns out no. It burns. It burns him. It burns a guy. Yeah, when you use soap and then you pee after. I heard like when you were a kid you put ice in your mouth before you eat a girl out. I was told that. The cold and minty apparently does something. I never did that. I'm thinking maybe I should.

I was pretty late to most of this stuff. Yeah. I used to think that having sex was just putting your balls in a girl's vagina. I was pretty young to most of this stuff I used to think that having sex was just putting your balls in a girl's vagina I was pretty young when I thought that there were kids that thought you get pregnant just by kissing you're young

it was because of that episode of Urkel he kisses Laura and all of a sudden as they're kissing he gets pregnant right away and as a kid I was like holy shit that's how it happens. What? Yeah.

That's what I thought. That is wild. This was a fun memory lane. Yeah. Just a nice waltz. I think just a nice waltz. We've probably had 200 episodes with this exact comic. Yeah.

Really? It's always the same. Yeah. It's always fun. It's always fun. Yeah. That's hilarious. Yeah.

There's new viewers every day. Yeah. We'll say I never did jerk off in school. No. But I would be in class. How are you doing this? I would be in class really horny, and I'd be like, I'm going to go to the bathroom and jerk off. And then I would stand up, and then I'd be like, what the fuck am I doing?

That clarity has to be nuts. Yeah. Yeah. Dude, when you're 14, 15 years old, there is no clarity. Oh, no, that's when you're ready to go. A minute Dude, when you're 14, 15 years old, there is no clarity. Yeah. Oh, no, that's why you're like, a minute later, I could do that again. I would argue that clarity is at the strongest when you're that age. No.

For me, it is. Really? Yeah. If I jerk off now, I don't feel comfortable after. Really? I was too. I look at myself in the mirror. I'm like, you're just-

I don't give a fuck. I just violated myself. Back then, I would be like, I'm going to kill myself. I was like, I'm doing something horrible right now. Hang on. You guys are like a decade apart in age. how old are you 27 no he's not he's 20 oh okay I didn't know how to clear you look super young for 27 years old that's incredible I was so afraid to get caught like searching porn I didn't know how to delete the history

and I've talked about this so The only porn I could watch was on E-Bombs World and it was a brick breaker game and if you broke the bricks, the naked picture was behind it. So I was focused on the game and trying to beat off. It really was an awesome brain exercise but I was getting too

frustrated with the game and then if I focused on my dick I would lose the... It was bottom up so I would get to pussy but then I would never get to tit. What a weird game. You think it would go top to bottom. So it was like the brick breaker that was on the phone so you go break the bricks.

Someone should remake that with just like a transgender person. Wait a second. You got to the top and it's just a dude? What music video have you taken to? God damn. Looking down. That would be the worst post-nut clarity.

Also, you start seeing beard hair. It's already... Trying to change the tab to a woman. Gotcha. Oh, it's so fucking funny. That would be the worst feeling after. You just finished and you're like, let me see what she really looks like. Let's get the high score.

Thumbs up. Oh, what? Oh, no. Start questioning everything. What music video have you tugged it to? Christina Aguilera, Dirty. None, because there was always better options. Moulin Rouge.

The one with all of them. I was a Christina Aguilera guy, I guess. The Moulin Rouge soundtrack video. I was tugging it to the internship uncensored strip club scene at an alarmingly old age. Yeah. At an age where I just had direct access to porn. I remember Titanic.

Pire up the Xbox. My mom had the Titanic VHS, and I forgot to rewind it, so she was like, the ship started, I don't know, the ship was about to go to a ride, and she went to the second tape,

and it was just right on the nude scene. Just like I was caught at the nose. I think the tits were in the first VHS. I don't know. Man, thank God for the internet. Yeah. Imagine going back, like, growing up with magazines. Your boy would go up in his treehouse,

because that's where every kid goes. Crew's up there, and you guys are just equally horny together looking at some girl. Looking at... I think I would have given up all sex and porn for a treehouse. There's nothing I wanted more. I never saw him in movies. Until you got the treehouse.

I've never seen a treehouse. Not in a tree. Not a treehouse proper. Not an actual treehouse. I've never watched that show. That's a good point. I've never actually seen a tree house That you see in movies And that ladder would be

I don't think I could climb up there There's nothing I wanted more than a go-car And a tree house It would just be a couple boards Nailed into a tree This is it I guess you're right I grew up in Arizona, there's no trees

That was a fantasy world to me Our township was getting rid of telephone poles guess you're right yeah i grew up in arizona there's like no there's no trees i never that was a fantasy world to me our township was getting rid of telephone poles and i don't know why but they like were like if anybody wants them so my neighbor bought full-size telephone poles and all the neighborhood dad spent an entire summer just drinking beers building a tree house and this telephone but we were like 15 16 by then so it was more like the dads just wanted an excuse to drink and hang out for the summer. We never really used it. It was like a little house on telephone poles like way up

in their backyard. Which is pretty cool. With the wires just dangling. It would be cool to have a treehouse now as a kid. Like I had my neighbor, he and I have been talking about building a treehouse bar on our property line. That would be awesome. I think that would be electric.

That would be an awesome situation. As a kid, though, you really don't know how to take advantage of that. No. You really don't. You kind of just hang out up there. You're like, this is my space. Yeah, that's it. Because legit, when I was younger, it was the closet.

I would always close the closet up, but I have like, okay, this is my part of the house. Right, right. Or you build a tent with the furniture. Oh, I love building. Oh, that was it. Oh, my God. Forts out of cushions. You have one wrong move in or out of that fort, and the whole fucking thing's coming You'd have toys sitting on just the top.

Yeah, pull things down. Not my forts. Oh, really? Structurally sound. Seriously? Yeah, we had a really stupid- Scooby's had the best forts, too. Yeah.

Snow forts in movies, or maybe just one movie. Snow Day. Snow Day, yeah. I tried to make- I tried so hard to for there's nothing i would want what i tried so hard to make one of those snow forts it's just impossible i always try i remember i tried to make an actual fort with like wood and hammers and nails didn't do it no i remember i got like hollywood i thought i was gonna be like a carpenter

and i like and i would just like go into like our shed going to be like a carpenter. And I would just go into our shed and just be banging shit around. Like I'm building something. Nothing was getting done. I would watch a show of people competing to build the best fort. Yeah, that would be sick. Like the show alone? I'd watch that show. Have you seen the show alone?

Oh yeah, it's awesome. Where they get dropped off in the business. In BC. That's where my wife is from. Not those islands, but in that area. They have to build their own house. That's the one, right? There's guys that build their own cabins.

Loose term cabin, but they have fire and everything. It's incredible. I would last 30 minutes. I would die there. I have zero survival skills. I couldn't build anything. I'm trying to think of what I could build. You are the least technical human.

I can't use my hands. No, you can't. We were trying to think of the most high-tech thing Kyle could use on his own, and I think it's one of those wire head massagers. But I'd have to bend out the wires. Crown Royal bag, though. That's pretty innovative.

The horny mind is... It's beautiful, isn't it? Yeah. Man. If only you could have used that for good. That's not like some crazy development. What? The Crown Royal bag.

You guys are giving me too many flowers. No way, dude. I would see it and be like, I'm not fucking that. Exactly. You look at it and go, yeah, she's hot, but I don't know if I could get her.

That would be a good game show you bring an object to somebody like can you fuck it yeah I'd tap out at shoebox oh 100%

yeah you would tap at shoebox before yeah you were the Tesla of Nikola Tesla I really appreciate this vote of confidence

I needed that when I said the shoebox thing you guys didn't say like oh yeah I was like no one was feeling that I'm trying to think of shoebox when you know guys didn't say, like, oh, yeah. I was like, I don't know. Literally, like, I'm going to miss on that one. I'm trying to think of shoebox when you know you either have some stuffed animals or, like, pillows right there.

I never thought about a pillow, but if you want to speak your truth, you're more than welcome to. It's not that. It's I felt comfortable when Big Mouth came out because I was like, oh, shit. This is fucking his pillow. Yeah. This is a common thing. And the kids are fucking genius, too, with the microwave macaroni and all that in there. But, like, a shoebox might be the least

sexy object ever made. Trying to think of a hole. I don't know dude. Like literally you got attracted to the shoebox just because you saw a hole in the side. Yeah because you're just laying in bed horny. You don't know what's what dude. The internet just came out. Yeah. I didn't know what it was going to supply me with.

One thing that I used to you get around the jerk off thing with your parents seeing it, is MySpace back in the day. Jerk-off like Tila Tequila? No, you know you get in rabbit holes. You probably go to Tila Tequila, and then her top friends, you find a couple people that would have hump day, and then it'd be some girl dressed up in a certain way. Oh, yeah.

Two weeks ago. You met Flavor Flav two weeks ago? Yeah, he was at the Michigan game. He's doing magic now. A magician? Yeah. I love at the Michigan game. He's doing magic now. Magician? Yeah. I love that. Does he look alive?

Yeah, he was still doing that. Yeah. He's got a giant clock, too. That's tough when you really put yourself into a hole like that. You can't escape it. You put yourself in a corner with the- You always have to have it. I'd have a big clock.

I really wanted it. I wanted to ask for it, but I didn't feel like it was the time. Time's ticking. Remember when he got married to the Russian's wife in Rocky IV? Flavor Flavor? Flavor Flavor. Remember that tall chick, that blonde? Oh, yeah. Bridget. Or was that her name?

That was the wife. I was obsessed with Flavor Flavor. No, you mean in the movie. Brigitte Nielsen, I think. There was a whole show. It was a VH1 reality show about those two. Say that again. Brigitte Nielsen, I believe. There was a whole VH1 reality show about those two. Oh, God, I got to hear Stephen. Say that again. Brigitte Nielsen, I believe. Yeah.

There was a whole VH1 reality show about those two. Yeah. Flav, not Flavor of Love. Because she was like the main one. She was like their love story had like a reality show, I feel like. Yes, yes. Because he did the Flavor Flav stuff. Yes, yes.

And then kind of went back to her type of thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, she was in Rocky IV. I had no idea. She smoked? She was tall. Yeah, I mean, she had a...

It was like 80s hot. It was like an 80s night. If she hot, she was tall. You fucked a shoebox, so yeah, she was hot. I'm trying to think of a situation where the... Yeah, she was hot. But she had like this... She had like this... Go ahead. I don't know what I'm trying to say here. Yeah, she was hot. But she had like this... She had like this...

Go ahead. I don't know what I'm trying to say here. Yeah, yeah. You're talking about in the movie, right? Rocky IV? Yeah, she's like... When I say like 90s hot, 80s hot, she had that... And she was in a power position.

She was just like, you know, that's my husband who fights. Shoulder pads were in. Yeah. Yeah, because she was kind of... Yeah. There she is right there. Regna at 54 Whoa

Good for her Wow Wow He really was like that Though in person Yeah he was exactly What you'd expect him to be Yeah

Yeah It was about it I must feel bad I would rather that be a character Really Yeah It's gotta be exhausting It obviously is

It's just him Yeah Yeah You know when people find Their own like catchphrases Or slogans Like you hear a new joke From a friend Then all of a sudden Really? Yeah. It's got to be exhausting. It obviously is. It's just him. Yeah. You know when people find their own catchphrases or slogans? You hear a new joke from a friend, then all of a sudden you want to tell that joke 17 more times, and you realize,

oh, I've just been saying the same joke around Will for five days straight. It's like he's just living that life, and everyone's like, oh, it's flavor. It's flavor. Please, flavor's my father. Call me flavor. Please, Flavor's my father. Oh, man. All right. What's up?

Oh, we have another ad. And while we're at it, big shout out to Brandon G. Spent $1,529. Nothing compared to these guys. Yeah, my God. You guys had a fan spell. That was nuts. You guys nuts.

The tier ones go hard, dude. Shout out them. That's amazing. 1,500 is crazy, though. Nick, wait. Before we do the ad, we have a couple of these to give away. But why do I have to wait? Well, I've been waiting for this for a little while.

All right. Kyle S. gets Kyle B's. Wow. Wow. Joe R gets Ebo's jacket. Yay. Ebo. No, no, no. That's Evan memes.

Oh, that's memes. Sorry, sorry. Matt S is going to get handsome Hank. Wow. That's a good one. That's to get Handsome Hank. Wow. That's a good one. And then Cameron S. is going to get mine. Oh. And they will be. All right.

You probably could take the names off if you wanted to. It's going to be like some sort of thread cutter. They will be just as wrinkly when they arrive. Clothes you don't want to edit, though. Roback. Those are great as is. Aren't they, boys? Outstanding.

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and it's like not too heavy but it's not it's like i wore it literally for four days straight i changed clothes but when i changed clothes, I was Roback. Use code YAK, Y-A-K, at Roback.com for a generous 20% off your first purchase through the end of the week. R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com for 20% off polos, Q-Zips, hoodies, code YAK. Roback joggers are here.

It's time to hop on board. That was an excellent ad read. Thank you. That was excellent. Yeah, I've learned. I've been trained. It's great to not be so good. Hey, you're preaching to the choir right now, bud. You should see me read. Thank you. Thank you. That was excellent. Yeah, I've learned. I've been trained to not be so good. Hey, you're

preaching to the choir right now, bud. You should see me read. Yeah. Thank God football worked out. It's a good time. I love when the I love the Titans

tick tocks when they go around like who's like the least funniest on the team. Do they make you do those or ask you sometimes and you tell them yes or tell them no based on the conversation.

But it's always the same thing. Who's the best dress? They're not sometimes, and you tell them yes or tell them no based on the conversation. But it's always the same thing. Who's the best dressed? They're not creative at all. Yeah, it's tough. It's funny to see them just talk. They always pile up on one person. Yeah. Usually Derrick Henry or Kevin Meyer.

That's life. Somebody's got to get piled up on. I don't know why the Titans or the NFL in general doesn't have better social media presence. Like, get the guy from Wendy's or somewhere that they can just talk shit. I don't know why the Titans or the NFL in general doesn't have better social media presence. Like, get the guy from Wendy's or somewhere that they can just talk shit. Because people appreciate the less clean cut. Absolutely. Like, any team that does anything outside the boring, bland, whatever. It's like they just figured out social media.

I feel like the Chargers have somebody. The Chargers are great. Yeah, I was going to say the Chargers have somebody that's pretty funny. Just do the same. They all do the same thing. Your schedule announcement was really good. The Chargers. They did a good job. Like, shut same. They all do the same thing. Your schedule announcement was really good. The Chargers. They did a good job.

Shut up. What's your favorite Thanksgiving food? What's the most overrated Halloween candy? And they made fun of Acho for calling Herbert a social media quarterback. Yeah. Last week. I love that. Anytime you control Acho.

So somebody had the Chargers account before the Chargers. I have never seen the Chargers. So their first tweet ever was like, going to P.F. Chang's with the wife. Saw that. Now the Chargers. That's the Chargers. So their first tweet ever was like, going to P.F. Chang's with the wife. I saw that. Now the Chargers. It was the Chargers' first ever tweet. But then when Twitter was about to shut down, they brought it back and they tweeted it again.

Oh, man. That's so funny. Yeah, it's great. Did you see the one they did this weekend? No, what was it? When did you guys first start jerking off? Oh, yeah, the Chargers were asking that. Oh, they really?

They did. They really? They did. They did. They did. They did. All the players had really great answers. Yeah, yeah. I would like to know. Eckler was good. All the players had really great answers. Yeah, yeah.

I would like to know. Eckler was young because I keep coming up bald early because that's a high-testing kind of guy. They really asked that. I need to find my wife and add up to P.O. Chang's. I think it was just like a guy had had Chargers. Back in 07. Yeah, yeah. They bought the account from him and just like let him do the job.

Whenever like a new social media comes out, we should just hop on every one word. There's got to be teams of people who do that. It's like a pseudo business, buying and selling domain names. Oh, people get swatted for it. People get their accounts robbed. Let's go to willcompton.com. Let's go to that. Whenever I bring this up, somebody will buy it and turn it into something.

Because tommysmokes.com, what is it right now? I don't know. What's WillCompton.com? Like the price of it? No, no. Let's see if somebody has it. Oh! Oh, yeah! That's a bias.

What? This guy rocks! It's such an easy photo, too, to just Photoshop my damn face on. This was so much better than anything I could have imagined. Wait, what's his song? He's got Sovereign? Let's hear it.

Dude, you're number two. Whoa. Oh, Will. Holy shit. I like how his picture was him with a saxophone. I know. And you saw the thing just hanging in his left hand. I was acting some smooth jazz.

I didn't even notice that the first time. I was too focused on everything. I was looking at the shoulders, how they're just so pointed at the end there. This has to be a European, right? Yeah, who's the guy from Grandma's Boy that's like, sit on my face. He's very like JB. Grandma's Boy, what a great movie. Very underrated.

Such a good movie. The Internship was another one that was pulled out earlier a good movie very underrated such a good movie The Internship was another one that was pulled out earlier that is an outstanding underrated movie good movie good strip club scene

good strip club scene great strip club scene having access to the internet but still jerking off to a DVD yeah that's outstanding oh

yeah god alright you guys have stuff to do yeah we're late to KFC. Oh, shit. All right. It's the Yak.

It's been a pleasure. Thank you, Taylor and Will. Who do we got? The final winner. Oh, yeah. Brandon G. Big Cat is flying you out. Let's go.

Hotel. Good job, Brandon. You're going to be on the Yak for a day. Hell yeah. There's five Kiss Coins left. Buy them now. Five Kiss Coins. My God.

Thank you so much to everybody who bought stuff. Very cool. Much appreciated. Good to see you. Tune into the telethon tonight. You're going to need a telethon. I'll talk to you later. Bye. It's your straws, yes, I will take through all It's the act

It's the act It's the act That's time to talk, shop, and do A Yankee's love is the act It's the act Yeah.