The Yak - Mook Had a WILD Weekend with Tony P in DC | The Yak 9-18-23

Episode Date: September 18, 2023

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KB's got glasses on today that... Yeah. He looks hot as fuck. The takeaway is that it's the first time in 10 years that I've worn glasses despite everyone in my life hounding me, especially my mother, aggressively. And I finally did it. Wait, so were you a contacts wearer? No, I my mother, aggressively. And I finally did it. Wait, so were you a contact swearer? No, I just couldn't see.

I was about to say. This screen has been hell for me. Yeah, I was about to say. My career as a yakker, yeah. Oh, yeah, playing, what was that quiz game we played? Sporkle. Well, you didn't really play it, Kate. No, that's true.

I didn't think that you guys play while I lose. I was about to say, I didn't think play it, Kate. No, that's true. I didn't think that you guys play while I lose. I was about to say, I didn't think that you were a glasses guy, because I've always thought of you as like a pure alpha male. And glasses are a sign of weakness. They are, yeah. You can see down this row. They're a sign of other people's weaknesses, because I can see your imperfections, your little divots, and like your little facial problems. Is there anybody you thought one looks better is there anybody you thought was hot that is now yes that's like a good thing on the street you're like oh yeah

never mind i was gonna smash but now i'll pass did your girlfriend make you get glasses no she i don't know she likes wait you're seeing her for the first time. Yeah. That was a big reveal. I'm still content. Oh, we have a lease together. This is the move for now, yeah. Like, TVs are awesome. Luke, don't be scared. I didn't like what you just did there.

Signs are good. I was going to say something else. I'm not going to. I don't like what you did right there. I don't want KB to look at me too closely. I think he's going to say something else. I'm not going to. I don't like what you did right there. I don't want KB to look at me too closely. I think he's going to hate me now. I feel like he got the vibe just out of how other people talk about you. Yeah, I guess. He picked up the context clues.

And based off of things that have happened to you, you probably expected a lot worse. Yeah, no, that's not bad, but you have good skin. Oh. I don't like this one. Do you have a beard? I didn't know that. Facial hair. A little stubble.

I got to shave. Yeah. The Mook Man is back off of a weekend in D.C. with Sass. How was it? Fun. Very fun. Good shows? Yeah.

Shout out to everyone that came out. Even the first show was fun? First show was fine. Okay. What happened in the first show? It was just a bomb fest. You and Sass or just you? Just the whole show. It was fun first show it was just a bomb fest you ancestors just you just the whole show it was fun but like it wasn't it's seven o'clock on a thursday it's a little light

out people are just getting off work they have work tomorrow it's not funny it's not funny hours yeah it's not funny so if it was a bomb fest how was it fun yeah it wasn't just covering it up it gets so bad it was funny no it got so bad that i blacked out the show from my memory and that was fun yeah got it this is why i respect you because if that ever happened to me i would quit it's game over and this happens to you often we were yeah it was it was like the type of show where you're up there doing your material and you're like i feel alone up here right now right that type of thing right you're up there doing your material and you're like, I feel alone up here right now. Right.

That type of thing. Right. You should just – have you ever thought about breaking – not character, but being like, this really sucks. Oh, yeah. You guys are right. Yeah. Yeah. We were having – all of us were having like panic attacks on stage.

It was just brutal. So Sass bombed too? No, he didn't bomb. Nobody actually bombed. It was a weak – there wasn't a weak crowd the crowd that was there was good but it wasn't enough to make up for the lack of laughs sure yeah okay good weekend though great you i mean you got to meet tony p and dc which i need to hear we need to hear everything can we see the video yeah for people who don't know obviously tony p and dc is one of the fellas wait did he

tell you the pace of the strut because he kind of like jumped ahead of you right i'm sorry to i couldn't i couldn't keep up yeah i mean he is oh he's also a black belt yep i pieced him up though like really really yeah he said he's a black belt it looks i need you to speak on his character behind the scenes so i just like to say this video was the most wholesome fun thing i've done in my life right like there's pure happiness in my face when you see me pass blocking with tony well usually when you're in a video it's somebody absolutely shitting on you yeah this felt good so you got you meet up with him how did it go so first off he like somewhat big time me oh we're somewhat meet at four o'clock.

We didn't meet until like 515. Why? What happened? Uber's running late. He was finishing up some content, some editing. Okay. So that's a fair big time. Like, no offense to you, but like Tony P, if he's got like a salmon crust that he's

got to do or law and order, like that's comes first. He had to deep clean a little bit. Okay. I alsobered to the wrong bar oh so i was like panicking that seems like a bigger deal yeah um wait were you late or was he late he was late that'd be funny if you're like yeah he big time you were late to the adjusted time i was late after if that makes sense no no so he said i'm not gonna be there until this time and then you were late for that time.

I was supposed to meet at 4. He ended up meeting there at 4.40, but I met him at the wrong place. You were late. You were late. You were overall the final consent. You were late. Two people can't be late. This is on you, not him.

He was late too, though. But both parties can't be late. He told you he was late. Who was the late one? There's only one. Both of us. You both can't be late. You guys met up.

Who was late? Yeah, the plan was to meet at 4. Wait, and then you said he big-time you you were later He adjusted I can't believe he did this but we were supposed to meet at four I got to the bar like you got to the wrong bar big Tony Pete did kind of big time because he went to the correct bar. Yeah that he's smarter than yeah Yeah, being like I know how to follow directions big time Oh big time, but like were you in the uber not there yet like oh i can't believe you big-timed me i was at the bar like by myself

i'm like where is this guy at okay what was the confusion about the bar uh it was a bar that had three different locations oh okay that makes sense who was at the right one tony p so you shut up early to the wrong bar that's the you were late you you were late. You were late. Okay, fine. Wait, did Sass not want to go? For the record, you big-time Tony P. Sass didn't want to go. Sass big-time Tony P. He wasn't aware of Tony P.

I tried to tell him. Wow. A lot of big-timing going on. Yeah, a lot of big-timing. A lot of big-timing going on. But met him at the right bar. He was already locked in, shaking the people's hands. He's got fans now

There's a video of him getting a standing ovation From the entirety of the bar I want to hear I want to see it Basically every person was coming up to him Going are you Tony P in DC And he was like yeah I'm the only one here In a blazer yeah of course it's me I fucking love this

Sounds like he's big time on everybody at all times. Is that how he talked to them? No. No, he is like the antidote of Andrew Tate. Like he, because in that interview he was talking about how masculinity can be seen as like dressing nice, being really happy. What are you laughing about? A piece

shot off of this microphone at warp speed and I don't know what it was. It went all the way over there. How did that happen? I don't know what all the way around how did that happen i don't know it went very far oh wow all right you sent it to tj sent it to tj um but basically we were at the bar and it was tough for us to talk because everyone would like come up to us wow or come up to him yeah it was i was his assistant for the day. I was taking pictures. I was... Is he nice? Super nice guy. He has a full-time job as an accountant. Consultant.

Consultant. That would actually rule if Tony P, we all fall in love with him, and then we find out he works for the military industrial complex. He's a big Halliburton guy. Iraq. I'll be fine with it. He's like, another day at my job. Yeah, he robs, trades drones.

Yeah, he's just got an Excel sheet on which kids to drone in the Middle East. All right, so it was a good time. So we meet up. Yeah, we end up talking. We had a good, like, I found out who he was. Not a character. He is who he is. He is who he is he is who he is he will morph he was like morphing into like strategic like self-aware mode but then he would morph right

back into Tony P like he'd be like mid-sentence and do like an arm roll I love it an arm roll like just organically organic yeah his move that's patented move. Yeah. Three of them. So then. Yep. No, no, no, no. All right. So when you do one, now take your arms off. Now do another.

Now take your arms off again. I don't think he's doing enough flourish. Now do another. There, that was. Okay. Yeah. It's kind of hard. That was my first time.

Yeah. You did pretty good. Thank you. Look at this. Wait, people are clapping for him they started chanting peahide this guy rules and then they boot him for the past good work um but yeah we left the bar you got a standing ovation from two bars. There was a bar behind us chanting as well. How many bars did you go to?

We were at one, but it was wedged in between two. People caught wind he was at the bar next door, and they started coming. Oh, this is like what happened to Taylor Swift. Yeah. Exactly. And we went and made some content on a dock right on the Washington Harbor. Does he drink? Yeah. Oh, yeah oh yeah oh like oh yeah oh yeah like drunk yeah no no no not my dog no okay he's locked in you know you say the bar caught wind of him did the bar ever catch wind that you were there

i got like a couple mooks but nothing it was nothing in comparison to the guy. Drowned out in a sea of pee. Did the mooks know that Tony P was like, did they come up and say, hey, mook, yeah, I got to FaceTime. Did people come up and say, hey, mook, and they're like, oh, shit, you're with Tony P. There were a couple times where I made eye contact with some bros, and they saw what was going on, and we kind of just gave each other the nod.

I didn't know you knew Tony P. Is he huge? where I made eye contact with some bros and they saw what was going on and we kind of just gave each other the nod. They knew you were on a date. Is he huge? In D.C. In D.C. He's Tony P in D.C. It's in the name. He's been taking off. Look at that. Wait, that, okay.

That's not like, that's not crazy numbers to have a full bar. He's probably gained about 40,000 new followers in the last couple weeks. So he's in the process of taking it. Yeah. Yeah. And he wants to do content full time. That's the dream.

I don't know if I like that or not. You don't want to be corrupted. Let me think about it. I want him to want to be a consultant more than anything. Yeah, I want him to be. Yeah, I wish that was his center. Content as his side hobby makes the content great. Yeah.

This is. Because without the fits and what would his, without the job, what's the content? Right. Like, what is he going to do with fits? Psychologically, if you're going out and that's happening, you don't want to do your nine to five every day. That's true. But yeah, would he, like, say hypothetically he got a job at Barstool Sports, not ruling it out, would he still dress in a suit every day? Oh, yeah.

Okay. His whole thing is like positive masculinity. Right, and I like that. It says that in his bio. Yeah. He really is like the perfect, he's the perfect Yang to, is it Ying and Yang? Sure. Yes. When I said Yang right there, that sounded mildly racist.

He's the perfect Yang to the Ying of like all of our lives where we just constantly shit on each other. Yeah. Yeah. And like put each other down and make ourselves feel better. It comes from a place of love. Of love. Total love.

But we were, on Anus, when you were when the cream pie god was discovered, we were all struggling, trying to be like, Mook, we're really happy for you that you found a girl that you like. And then we couldn't get it out for more than 20 seconds before we were just talking about him cream pie-ing this girl. I felt a little gay after complimenting him. Yeah, that's true. Exactly.

So with Tony, the whole thing is like you feel amazing like you feel wholesome did he compliment you yeah did the conversation flow or was it like an awkward day or like he really knows how to like he knows how to do it another question yeah could we break him oh yeah yeah yeah because that now interesting within a ton P would be a great series. Within a yak. Breaking him would be a fun challenge. What would constitute him being broken to you? Getting out of content.

Throwing a high noon at someone. We could break him. Wait, Tony P and Rico should do a video series together. So how did the date end end up it ended with us going to a dock making those videos huh and then we parted ways I had to go to a show I was running late for stand-up that night but I was like I have to yeah it's Tony P I have to get these easy yeah you see a taken man no he's he's doing well oh well I don't want to like he's a... He's doing well. Oh!

He's doing well. I don't want to expose Cody P. His success is... He was being approached? It wasn't just men like us that we're used to. He had a good split. Yes. Wow. Probably 50-50.

Whoa. Was he ever like, oh, I got to try to make this happen. I got to try to fuck. No. I feel like girls are attracted to a guy like that. At this point, I feel like actually, yes, there's all this talk like girls don't want nice guys, blah, blah.

I feel like we're a little tired and we kind of do. Yeah, they want nice guys. Tired from what? Celebrity. They don't want nice guys who aren't getting any claps and eyes. That's true. That's a good point. Tony P is a hot topic. We were talking ladies at one point. Were you talking about your lady? guys who aren't getting any claps and I that's true that's a good point yeah I get it we're talking ladies at one point oh we talk about your lady no your new

lady via Twitter last night he knows how to use an iron no I mean you it was big cat commented on it even I came in to help you out I mean she needed to know who the cream pie God was so we let her know yeah wait who was I was morning, and this girl's like, who's tagging me in this cream pie guy? Yeah. Who was that? The algorithm had her tweet pop up at, like, midnight last night. Who is Connor Mook, and why did everyone tag him in my cream pie tweet? I said he's the cream pie king.

Yep. Good looks. Big – I don't really like the big body. Big body boss, man. That was a lot. No, but we were just talking about it. Calling you boss man is too much of a compliment. He's got to throw in big body.

You're right. You're right. That's good. Yeah, yeah. You're like a special heavy one. Yeah, right. Exactly. Right.

Like Tony P would just be like, thanks, boss man. Yeah. Too nice. Too nice. I need to. Casual. Big body's formal. You had to let me know that it was truly you tweeting that, not so you hadn't been kidnapped

by Tony P. Exactly. In D.C. I do. I want to hang out with him You had to let me know that it was truly you tweeting that, not so you hadn't been kidnapped by Tony P. Exactly. In D.C. I do. I want to hang with him. Don't let me be a fun-ass guy that you don't deserve me to be by God. That's a fact. Mm-hmm.

So what's the next? That's not getting approved. We've been trying. What's the shirt that you guys wear? Can you pull it? Oh, yeah. We had another one. It's pretty subtle and i submitted

it and no go no go on this one i know i know it's good because i've never seen a shirt where the it's back in front yeah i spent the night with connor mook and all i got was a pussy full of cream and i even added that wavy effect that's on all of Brianna Chicken Fry's merch. Yeah. Front and graph back. But also, Big Cat, the graphic would also be on the inside of it on both sides as well. Oh. It's a new four-way tee.

What if we just sold a pocket tee with just a splooge on it? Oh, yeah. Very subtle. Yeah. Like the wet emoji. Yeah, yeah. Very subtle. Yeah. Like the wet emoji. Yeah, right. But what if the pocket is pink? Ooh, I like that.

And it has the splooge. Splooge spells out mook. Oh. The mook comes. That is your calling card. The mook, yeah. You always spell it out after. When Tony P was walking in the street,

and when you guys were walking from bar to bar or whatever, and people would shout him out in the street, was he so big time that he would just raise a finger in the air? Oh, yeah. He has a PowerPoint down. But anyone that came up to him, he was like, I love you, I love the Peahive, thank you so much, this means everything to me.

And he would take the time to talk to them and take pictures with them. Sounds like a great guy. What was that? Hold on, hold on, hold on. He's been unanimously sucked. Can he handle any pressure or hate? Break him. Right.

Was that a necessary question? How did he handle hate? I don't think you can make Tony P hate himself or hate what he's doing. He loves it. So he preaches positive masculinity. We would have to turn him into a pessimistic gay. Yeah. Like Stephen Chay. Well, no, his arch enemy is Andrew Tate.

Right. Oh. Right. That's still masculinity that Tate's preaching, though, right? They're on a different spectrum. Yeah. Yeah, it's like the left and the right of masculinity. Uh-huh.

Got it. Yeah, he has found himself, he has somehow incubated a perfect online existence that doesn't exist today, where people are nice to each other. Yeah. Very weird world. It's like an upside down world. It's crazy that we see the bare minimum of kindness. We're like, this is awesome. Yeah.

This guy's special. My life changed on Saturday. Are you going to try? Did he make you a better person yes i was like i'm going to start volunteering somewhere like i was like not even but you're not but you want to i need to chase that dragon of wanting to actually is more important than actually doing it you feel good yeah it just means that you have your heart is in the right place i think that's more important than action i've been saying it for like six months now. Yeah, that's great. I'm very proud of you.

Thank you. For wanting to, to help others. So wait, what's the follow-up? What's the next step? Do you have another video coming out? Yeah, we have one more video. When is he dropping it? Tony P does Tony P.

I was like, when are you thinking about scheduling this? And he had like a whole schedule of like, I'm doing this here, this there. Wow. So it's a video of him showing me his signature moves. Oh. Arm roll, the walk. I need it right now. Sunglasses, the whole shebang.

Fuck. I need it right now. So that's coming out, I think, later this week. I think maybe Friday. So are we going to get Tony P maybe coming to get an office visit? He's ready. Okay. This is great.

This is a real fella in like that we're actually going to be interacting. We should have him as a guest judge on the next fella Friday. Was there any, uh, uh, yeah. Yeah. Was there any feedback or development with the fella that we did ground on Friday? Uh, yeah. George drinks. Yeah. I haven't checked. Is he posting? I think he liked a comment saying congrats on winning fella of the month. Well, it's not him. It's his son. What about to, what's his name?

John. His TikTok DMs are locked unless he follows you. So I commented and asked him to follow me, please. That's really pathetic. I don't think he posted all weekend. Yeah, it is. Please follow me. You see those bots all the time on Twitter.

I got big information about the game. Please follow me. I'm the horniest 18-year-old on Twitter. Yeah. There can't be that many horny. Every one of bots all the time on Twitter. I got big information about the game. Please follow the 18-year-old on Twitter. There can't be that many horny. Every one of them is the horniest. Well, some are the thickest. Oh, okay. That's true. Some are the wettest as well.

Really? Did anyone what? Oh, did any of you hear from your fellow? You heard from your trucker, right? I heard from mine. Crazy Trucker Ain't Loud. He hasn't posted in a while. And I think I was saying to you guys after the show,

I was like, it makes me nervous. He hasn't posted in like a year. Like, I saying to you guys after the show is like it makes me nervous he hasn't posted in like a year like I hope he's still around and he DM me he's like I'm still around I'm actually taking my truck offline I'm making it louder nice making it louder so he'll be back I think the singing fella that I got took it personal that he didn't win because he's been dropping some eaters since yeah he Yeah, he dropped like two or three new videos. Three songs? Yeah, I can't even remember what his – we can watch it.

For anyone who missed Fellow Friday, go back and watch because it was truly a delight. Did you see the moment that Stephen Shea picked Brad Johnson as his fellow? I don't know who that is, but I saw it. He won a Super Bowl as the starting quarterback for the – Oh, that Brad Johnson? Yeah. That Brad Johnson was the guy he – That was who steven picked as his fella that's not a fella no he's what he does he still doesn't know what he did wrong guys he still doesn't know yeah i was

office every day yeah i was laughing to myself many times on friday night just thinking about steven being like brad Brad Johnson little known Brad Johnson diamond in the rough I mean you can't rule out him bringing Brad Johnson next time yeah no I think he should he should just keep submitting do you have any backups like any one else that you would consider if you say backups I just want to assume second string

Sean King you saw all of our fellas do you have anyone that could like compete dude perfect is what his backup is my only person because i knew that this was coming and when i found out the task of the assignment i was like i got the perfect guy brad johnson no you don't you don't have the perfect guy i think that comment summed it up that you sent in the group you're like well the fellow was steven picking yeah yeah

someone commented uh on my tweet he's like i said out loud as i was watching this is what happened when a fellow picks a fellow yeah he double fell and that's exactly what happened we were trying to find unfound fellows and you used a guy who's been famous for 30 years well he was never famous on social media oh Oh, my God. I feel like it's a valid argument. It was a blind resume? Dude, sick trick shot. So, if you're not... Upright.

If you're not famous on social media, that qualifies you for fella? In my mind, I thought it should, but apparently not. Yeah, but he's famous away from social media.

Like, Leonardo DiCaprio, does he have an Instagram? Don't think so. I don't think so. So he would be a fellow if he started this? Yeah, if he posted one thing. 10,000 followers and he did cool shit. And one more thing, and I think somebody pointed out,

his first trick shot was throwing it at the side of the goal post. His next trick shot was throwing it at the goal post again from a different angle. Correct. Let's bring his – well, all right. It is what it is. He was using his skill that I don't know

don't tell don't explain a Super Bowl winning quarterback Super Bowl winning quarterback using that skill it's like if like little Steph Curry started hitting

like half court shots and posting it like check out this fellow damn I didn't know he had that I didn't in his yeah

did you have the videos of the guy who I think he dropped like two or three you made him up his game something like I didn't know he had that. Did you have the videos of the guy who, I think he dropped like two or three. You made him up his game? Something like that. I don't, yeah. What is this one? Is he deaf? He does sound deaf. I just realized that.

He might be deaf. He might be the best deaf singer in the world. I love him. He's just in a parking lot. Whoa. Oh. Is that Fred and Barney? Yeah, I like that shit. Wait, did Anthony Acutis die?

No. Oh. He's in a very different geographical location. I know. Every time. Just a majestic backdrop so I think he took offense to the fact we didn't pick him

this is where I thought I really had the flashbacks KB of you doing re-discovering the Moon. Yeah, it's the same dance. Oh, he's in the street. For like a half a second. There he's back.

Oh! Barefoot. Two hours ago. Two hours ago? He's been on a posting spree. I think he took offense to us. One hour ago. Oh, Little Beatles.

He knows a lot of songs. And it's a very different genres of songs. I know. No, you never know. Wait, did he just glance at his phone for lyrics? Also, who's filming these? His mom. Yeah, probably.

He probably just got a lot of followers. Wait, is he married? Is that his wedding? Oh, it's part of the video. Is this his own? Is this an original? Is he in a courthouse? How big is that cross?

Oh, that's a sick bong. I really hope no particular mood. But when you leave, I... I really hope... Am I... I hope they pan out and there's little kids on the slide at the... Yeah. Am I weird or the more we watch him, the better he gets? That wasn't bad.

That was good. That wasn't bad. I think he's good. Which is terrifying because now we know he thinks he's good across the board. I just like the hustle of like taking offense to not being fell and being like I'll show these guys here's even more content oh I thought that was his necklace

oh that's a t-shirt what's the merch it says just it's signed just Tatum he only values his signature at five dollars TJ can you get around a sign just tell him just Tatum just Tatum

I like this guy what's his name again just Tatum I think is his name is his name just Tatum also I can't tell if he's like 20 or 40 I bet you he's 25 from Phoenix well I if he's like 20 or 40. I bet you he's 25 from Phoenix. Yeah. Well, I think he's like a Sacramento.

I was going to say Northern California. I was going to say Northern California. That's a good guess. Going off the scrub brush. California, NorCal, not on the coast. That makes sense, too. He had the Patriots jersey. I don't know.

Just had him. Yeah, he looks four different ages there. Yep. It's tough to say. Just had him. Yeah, he looks four different ages there. Yep. It's tough to say. What a legend. By the way, the Stevens cash cube came in. It is way bigger than I thought. Is it here?

No, it's in my house. I'll bring it in tonight. Maybe we'll try to build it tomorrow. I think it's just inflatable, right? Yeah, so we're just going to need, and I'll bring in a bunch of ones, and we'll put Steven in the cash cube for the whole show and those rat traps and the rat traps sticky glue traps blue traps okay those cards yeah oh yeah oh i've been itching to oh i know i didn't i actually i want to save them i i'll buy more but i was gonna bring in a pack today i'll bring in a pack

i was just do a pack every you're a card guy I'm a big card guy yeah I think the Jefferson Davis is right over there so some dude in British Columbia DM me and asked if we I could mail him to Jefferson Davis yeah are they racist as hell up there I don't know pretty sorry not right can't some vancouver like saskatchewan is not i think it's pretty like rural right i thought they were very liberal right yeah vancouver felt like he was liberal you would think seattle adjacent right yeah culturally yeah asian population like the biggest i think yeah i don't know and yes huh i feel like it's like that portland vibe where it's you go just like an inch outside of there and you're like oh it was delicious i kind of like your toes yeah indian

is asian too yeah but yeah i think indian is actually is caucasian though what really they've reclassified i think so caucasian is asian as well what's the people i'm gonna have to say no i'm gonna have to deny that. Yeah. Also, I'm looking for another dude named Maresh Patel that lives in Chicago. If anybody wants to reach out, I'm just going to swap him. We'll find a new Maresh. There's got to be one, right?

We should be able to find that. Yeah. We'll absolutely find a new Maresh. We might have to do a competition to choose one of the Maresh Patels that come forth. We have an Iranian coming in tomorrow on the act. Oh, yeah. So my friend who's a stand-up comedian who's going to start doing some shows with Mook, I linked him up, and I told him he's going to come by and do the act tomorrow.

So we'll put Steven in the cash cube. Mm-hmm. And then I also, Thursday I'm out because I'm doing a live pro-am, which, do you think I'll get backlash? I don't think so. There's going to be blood-am, which I think I'll get backlash. I don't think so. There's going to be blood on your head. No, you'll be fine. It's also a closed.

How much money are they giving you? Three, four mil? No, it was like 10. Wow, okay. That's not bad. A million for nine holes. I can't blame you. Yeah.

It was a mil hole and then one extra for just taking a bunch of pictures. Sure. I'd be like, cool. extra for just taking a bunch of pictures. Sure. So I'm out on Thursday, but Friday I think Francis J. Fleming is going to be here. Well, well, well. When do we leave? Friday night.

Are you guys excited? Mm-hmm. I'm not going to lie. I'm not. What can we do to get you excited? I feel like nothing against the event. Nick, how have you not gotten out of this yet? I just can't because I'd have to say no.

Yeah, that's not. And therein lies the problem. No, I'm excited to compete, I guess. Yeah. That part would get exciting. The traveling sucks. No, it's really good to be there for like 12 hours. Wait, so our flight's midnight Saturday?

Yeah, Saturday night. And when do you fly out? That's when we come back. And when do you fly Friday? Friday night. So you're going like red eye, roof ball, red eye. Oh, that's great. I mean, we'll get there at night.

Do we even have a hotel? We do. Where is it Everton Oregon and you're not going to the Nike facility I think we are right I don't he's been like I don't think we're allowed to see no time y'all got oh shit oh you are you doing koi right now, Steven? That's, well. We're all meek and Steven's coy. Are you? Are you being Asian carp? Yeah, I mean, I'd be swimming. I'm wearing some orange right now.

But are you going to the, you're not answering the question, so I think you're just trying to elude it? I think we'll stop by. You guys are going. I think we're getting a tour, right? Why can't you say you're getting a tour? Are we sneaking in? Yeah, what are we doing?

I didn't know that was a... I thought we were just getting a tour. I thought it was like a conflict of interest thing. There's no way you can just sneak into the... You know that it doesn't look like it looked like an air, right? I don't. I don't know what it looks like at all. Okay, I'll tell you right now that Nike has...

I know this is... Hopefully you're sitting down. Nike's made a lot of money since that. So when you invited me and Kyle, was there a... I thought this was like a ticketed thing. Tony P would sear you up. There is a guy who works there that's going to help us out. We got an email invite.

Do you think you're risking his job? No. No, no, no, no. Nothing is... Yeah. We were asked explicitly to like, we can't film stuff there. Do they know that you hated Air the movie? Oh, yeah.

No, you did hate it. Yeah. Remind them on the tour. Remind them on the tour. You wrote blogs about it. Because they didn't have romance, right? Yeah, it was the most overhyped movie of this decade so far. I still don't know where the hype came from, but yeah.

Rotten Tomatoes is like 9. Air is a fantastic movie. It was all right. Do bring that up, though. Maybe 10 minutes into the tour, get comfortable. Get to the point of the tour where they can't just turn around and kick you out. But we also can't videotape it, I guess, since it's top secret. So we'll have to voice record it, and then maybe somebody could animate it.

Yes. What time is Roofball? I have to get logistics. I think it's 1 o'clock. You guys are going to have a packed schedule. Two of you and Che? So we're landing early in the morning. You're so lucky.

No, we're landing at night. We're going to land probably at like 9 o'clock at night. There's going to be so many weird Che quirks you guys are going to come back with on Monday. I'm excited to see him piss on the plane when it lands. Oh. Yeah. The patented move. There he goes. Damn. quirks you guys are going to come back with on Monday. I'm excited to see him piss on the plane when it lands. The patented move. There he goes. So are you competing in Roof Bowl?

I would hope so if you're going all that way. I got an email that I was going as well. So it really is. He's not even competing. He's doing social. You don't compete. That's the saddest thing ever, Nick. You have to compete. What if the saddest thing ever, Nick. Yeah. You have to compete.

So it's a situation where. What if the guy's like, you didn't qualify for this event? You won the cash prize. That was off the bat. You can't qualify when you get on a plane. Yeah, did everyone else qualify for the event? I feel like you just show up. Oh, yeah.

All the other guys are just there. No, they had. Right? I saw they had like entry qualifiers today or this past weekend. Wait, really? Yeah. I might not be playing. You have to play.

It would be funnier if I didn't. The whole thing. So if they send KB somewhere, you're just automatically going every time? That's how it goes. That's pretty fun. That is funny. But KB sometimes can get out of when Nick goes. Oh, often.

That's right. He does a lot without me. So he'll say no. The passport trick. Yeah. Also also the roofball documentary comes out yeah michelangelo yeah i saw michelangelo too he's giving lessons by the way if anyone's looking to get into editing and stuff love that there we go that comes out next week check out yeah michelangelo you think i got i think i got uh he's gonna be there yes oh really i think i got nick buono a job did you yeah hopefully it works out very good yeah hell yeah he's the best not at barstool well he was that would have been nice if he's a good dude

he was affiliated with wrestling yeah that was actually probably why. Yeah, that's career poison. Yeah. Was anyone who was affiliated with wrestling still around? I'm doing it. Nick, yeah. Nick's doing great. For now.

Actually, I've got to talk to you after this. Oh, shit. So we see you did two episodes of wrestling. Yeah. Huh. How was Mostly Sports, Brandon? It's good. so we see you did two episodes of rascal yeah huh how was mostly sports brandon it's good it's a fantastic show i enjoyed you're not allowed to say that have y'all watched it yeah what what do you think i like it a lot thanks it's been going good big cat thank you you're welcome we get here early now i'm an early guy i know i saw you lounging on the couch looking like you were gassed.

I would have taken a nap if y'all hadn't kept walking in, yes. Oh. We need to put a bunk bed in the new office. I get up at 5 now. I think the basketball court is going in today. Is it? It's starting to go in, yes. Oh, hell yeah.

Very excited. The countdown for the studio opening, the new office opening on Mostly Sports was 55 days today. What? That's what TJ comes up with. He just comes up with his own countdown. You came up with that just randomly? I think I started at 27, and I just kind of bump it up every half hour or so. I had one of our guys, Shane, who is really talented, works on part of my take last night.

He was like, next week, this time this time we're gonna be in the new office and i was like no one told you it's like i wish i was just living your life just any ideas when yeah i think it's gonna be mid-october i think it's gonna be right after surviving barstool the uh intern reed moves here next week and he asked me which office to report to yeah yeah mincey's here tonight i think think. I forgot about him. Wow. Did anyone tell Mincy that we're not in that office yet? He'll figure it out. Yeah.

Really? He'll do something. He will do something. That is a fact. Actually, no. Well, yeah, you're right. No, there's a chance he won't do anything. That's correct.

I bet on that. You actually can never say Mincy will do anything. That's correct. I bet on that. You actually can never say Mincy will do something. Yeah. Because a lot of times, he had to make a, did you see his press conference where so many people were asking him if he was going to widespread panic? I did see that. He had to tell him that he can't make every show.

You know, you live a hell of a life when you live in New Orleans and you have to announce you're not going to the widespread concert in North Carolina. Yeah. That's because he was going to Dave Chappelle. That's true. Did y'all see his review about the thing? He did put out content. Did he try any of the jokes?

No. It's an amazing review. Just a very small piece of the joke. I think it's the best review I've ever seen. Is it a video review? Yeah, it's a video review and it was like, okay, this was actual good content. Send him somewhere, and he will give a review, and it will be like you can decide if you want to go or not. So I've never seen Dave Chappelle live.

I actually haven't either, so I'd like to see. No, I'm assuming this will be enough that I never have to. Oh, yeah. This will be so good. Yeah. It's like I got my fix. Yeah, I want to be persuaded to go to another – He didn't even do this out of obligation because of the free tickets, I'd imagine.

Got it. So Dave Chappelle review presented by Game Time. All right, we scored last-minute tickets, two of them, to see Dave Chappelle tonight at Smoothie King Center. Unfortunately, they took our phones, so I couldn't do the video in there. But I'll tell you why you want to use Game Time. Sign up with Code Stool and get $20 off your first order of GameTime, the best in the ticketing business. Show review for Dave Chappelle.

I have absolutely no comment whatsoever. Wait, what? What? Pretty good review. Don't y'all want to go? That was his first Dave Chappelle review. Probably a safe move on his end. Yeah.

Why can't he be like, that was great? Or bad. I laughed. Nope. I'm ready to go to game time right now and get tickets to Chappelle. He no commented a review? Yeah, no comment. Took the free tickets.

Took the free tickets. He's no comment in the review. I'm up at Fat Harry's now with a big crew. If anyone's out in New Orleans and wants to say hello, man of the people. No comment in the review. The no comment review. He's a fella. He should do that.

Oh, Mincy's 100% a fella. Mincy's no comment reviews would be an amazing series. Well, that's pretty much what he does with his food reviews, though. He just says, I'm sitting down and eating this, and he never says what he thinks of the food. Yeah, Mincy was an original fellow because that's how

he got hired. He got hired just off of this. Yeah, he's a fellow. There's always something about the first two seconds before he starts speaking before he realizes the camera. There's something about every video, the way he's standing yeah his body never knows what to do yeah it's a life yeah him sliding into the megan making money video was fantastic again that was yeah what is this i don't know which one is this that was a what review was that uh barstool scottsdale bar got it they serve drinks uh that's the review but he's sober

it's a bar yeah yeah it's a bar four walls roof no comment bathroom no comment review i'm i think i'm addicted to that but non-review review yeah because i if he does enough of these you'll be able to figure out how he says no comment. Yeah, you've got to study his body language. Right, exactly. How he actually enjoyed it. Well, a real professional wouldn't give that away. Yeah, that's true.

He's a poker shark. He's a poker, yeah. He has no tell. Have you watched him play poker? I would love to just watch his mannerisms. They're exactly what you think they are. Yeah. I know that I have lost a lot of money staking him.

Yeah. But that's okay. That's part of the business. Part of the game. Yeah, that's a tax write-off somewhere. I've got the tax guy behind me. They're fully erect. I'm fully erect.

And I'm way more excited, actually, the fact that I've got a special guest here with me. We're about to head on over to the... What is he doing with his hand? He looked like he wanted to either hug her or strangle her. Go back again. Those were strangle hands. Bobby doesn't know what to do.

I'm fully erect. He had to restrain himself. I got a special guest here with me. We're about to head on had to restrain himself he was assessing the situation she's like okay she doesn't want to fight me it does seem like his hands are controlled by somebody off screen oh fuck i love him so much did you guys see dana beers try and kick a field goal yeah yeah stadium full he's cursed all of cincinnati yeah i mean so he chose cincinnati last year they immediately lost their 20 game home winning streak their coach left i think they lost at home to miami of ohio the other day yeah but then he went to the bengals game and that one and

they're owing to yeah joe burrow might be hurt again yeah oh the jungle is a place to be look at him i don't think he washes that he wears it every time see this to me seems cool for him oh very definitely i didn't know he was that high up in the look at at this. Oh, this is sick. It's a packed stadium. He's getting fired up. What's he saying? Oh. They treat him like a god. That's like unreal, the treatment he gets. Like crowds of people surrounding him.

Anything they want on the field. Dana B and Cincy. That's like me on Rice's campus. Oh, my God. He's going to miss it horribly. Is that that embarrassing? He's going to get booed. Look, he's good at what he does.

Just right. He's good. And then that. Dana's great. Yep. That looks so awesome. How many push-ups did he do he's got to be so out of breath that was that was a w in my opinion yeah it was a colossal he just is the man of cincinnati now yeah cincinnati was probably looking for a man good for him he's the dark knight of Cincinnati. Ever since Pete Rose.

He got a tattoo of the Bearcats on his body. Good team. Yeah. Historically. Why'd you have to clarify on his body? They had a Steubenville boy on someone else's body. A piece of paper? It's probably all stretched out now.

I get all my tattoos on Nick's body. Yep. He picks them out, I get them. That's a good idea. I'll get tattoos for you guys. Yeah, Nick is my canvas. You can say you have a tattoo if you buy it and it's on me. You have a tattoo, but it's not on you.

I got a tattoo where? Nick. It's on me. Yeah, where is it? Nick. Yeah, dude, pick something out. Okay, I will. Get something nice. Get your wife's name on Nick. You just got another one, didn't you? Yeah, there's one right down the street. It's fun to go to. I might just get the cream pie god.

A mook face. Whatever you want, man. Your tattoo. You should get a cream pie tattoo. Where should I get it? Right above your dick. Like, here comes the cream. What's that writing writing like the gangster writing

yeah yeah yeah no regrets yeah get ready for the cream how awkward have your subsequent cream pies been since that yeah they just know it's coming now so it's happened multiple times i can't not cream okay you're right. But, like, are they mad when they aren't as filled as they typically are filled? Yeah, I mean, I only have so much, like a finite amount. It's funny because you look like Little Debbie, and that's her specialty as well. Yeah, I saw that. What if the tattoo was, like, instead of, you know, like when you go to the gas station, it says, like, diesel. It just says cream.

Oh, that would be a good tattoo like cream 499 hose that goes to your dick oh that's good that's really good need that mock up yeah i would love somebody mock that up that's a really good idea someone said like me after three beers straight cream pie you just fall back on your shit yeah right back to the cream team in time oh that's pretty good kind of work and that looks like a pretty typical oh I like it on pink oh that's that's tough I'd rock it. You'd rock your own name in cum? I would do it. Get a fit off. For a few bucks extra, will you actually come on those shirts for people?

Oh, $5. $5 more, it'll bust on it. An original cream. No, I have to pay people to take my sperm. Like at a sperm bank. What? What? Prostitution? They don't take my sperm. Like at a sperm bank. What? What?

Prostitution? They don't accept ginger sperm. Really? I believe that fully, but you've tried? Maybe. I've been strapped for cash. They don't take ginger sperm at sperm banks? Yeah, there's like an article out there. It's like sperm banks to redheads.

We don't want your semen. Damn. Holy shit. They should just take it out of pity and just throw it out is there like i have a program where they're like yeah right there are no redhead sign no but i should be like apply they just have a dumpster of ginger cum in the behind somewhere someone is like stockpiling ginger sperm can you tell is it like does ginger cum have freckles?

Oh, good question. I mean, do you want to get cream-pied or what? I'm not against it. You want this cream, Papa? Why do they not want ginger cum? Why do they not? We're not in demand. I get it.

Oh, because people just don't want it. Nobody goes to a sperm bank and is like, I want a redhead. Oh, I can see people wanting a little redhead. No, no. Maybe as a four-year-old. Oh, I can see people wanting a little redhead. Maybe as a four-year-old. Yeah, they got to grow out of it, though. Redhead's not one. Oh, my God. That is straightforward.

That is so fucked. Holy shit. If you got red hair, don't bother donating sperm. Well, it says we have nothing against, but you obviously do. Our stock is about to explode. Come on. That's what Mook says before he comes. My stock's about to explode.

He just brown-eyed Scandinavian Caucasians. This is all fake. Yeah, this can't be real. It's all fake. There's a news segment on it. I've got to find it. What? Look, you're a Viking.

That's something. Yeah. Huh. Okay. Would any of you guys donate your sperm if you knew, like, maybe it could be a kid at some point or whatever? Like, no. I already have. No.

Not even if the price is right? Yeah. How much do you get paid to do that? I don't know. 50 bucks. 50 bucks? You have to jack off in a waiting room. Yeah, and then you walk out and everybody knows you beat up. No phone. Layla bucks you have to jack off in a waiting room yeah and then you walk out

everybody knows you beat all the phone right they let you have your phone they probably give that's still so awkward like yeah go jack off yeah i would i wouldn't be surprised if they're like they have like old pornos and there's probably some dude out there who can't find old pornos so he just donates his sperm constantly. Yeah. He's just like, the only way I can get these Jenna Jameson original tapes is at the bank. They have the monopoly on them. I have to go there every day.

That's how a lot of people stay afloat in comedy. A lot of stand-ups. And blood. Blood, semen. Plasma. That hurts. I used to donate as plasma. Yeah.

I don't have money. Oh! It's reversed! No. Blood, semen, plasma. That hurts. I used to donate as plasma. Yeah. Oh, it's reversed. No. 2017. No, that's old. The other one was 2011. There's more. I sent TJ.

So who knows where the supply is now? They couldn't think of four people. So they did two twice. We need to find four. Four successful gingers now. Let's do McGregor twice. We need to find four. Four successful gingers. Now let's do McGregor twice. The phone bank is saying thanks but no thanks

to one pool of potential donors. People with red hair. The problem is given the choice the majority of women would prefer a child and a partner

with the more commonly found blonde or dark hair. Look at the tag at the bottom. Ken Jack's tweet. Of another. I love how they blur the bottom. Ken Jack's tweet. I love how they blur the faces. Who else did he tag?

That's a lot. Me and you, Kyle. Wait, oh, were we talking about the yak before? Oh, we must have been. Oh, we must have talked about it on the bracket. Yeah, we must have. Oh, our cum bracket. I remember that. Oh, yeah, yeah. The bracket of the color hair of children you'd want.

What the fuck? No, dude. Okay. You gonna do it? They like us to make a... We shouldn't do it in front of a sperm bank segment. Well, we're always doing sperm bank segments. Yeah, this feels just like a sperm kind of day, Che.

I've been told this. Do you want me just like a sperm kind of day, Che. I've been told this. Do you want me to make like a real joke to break the silence? You've directly been told no ads around sperm bank segments? Deemed, potentially, like.

Okay. I'm going with what I'm told. I'll do it in five minutes. Well, football yesterday was pretty good. Football was. It made me want to fucking cum.

We're never getting this ad. Che, you tweeted at 1.04 a.m. Saturday night. Something like, the grind never stops. There are no shortcuts to success. Something like that? Correct. At 1.04 a.m. on Saturday night. Yep.

What was going on in your life? Several hours of prop research. going through a bunch of plays and uh paid off we got a we got a winning ticket yesterday you made me money che there are no shortcuts to great i just the timing was incredible yeah right right before i hit the hay do you uh do you think how you you want to save those for a great gambler what's that your goal is to be a great gambler or do you think you want to be a great gambler? What's that? Your goal is to be a great gambler, or do you think you already are? I give out. I spend a lot of time researching, so I'm a service, essentially. Can I just point out that when it comes to gambling, I feel like big parlays like the U-Hit, they are shortcuts to greatness.

You just throw in one bet, and you win five times what you would win normally. Sure. So what you're doing is what you would win normally. Sure. So what you're doing is literally a shortcut to greatness. Gambling is a shortcut. Yeah, gambling at its core. Shortcut to greatness. I put in the work. That's why.

I see what you're saying. I'm kind of bashing the end product, which I am hoping to achieve. I'm just trying to give you long enough to where you can read the end. Sure, yep. Do you think he should be edging people into it? Yeah, you're going to find yourself in a sticky, sticky situation. I've been edging people to greatness in gambling for a very long time. Okay.

There you go. It will pay off. Building up the cream? Yeah. But it is time to load up the ice and break out the oversized lawn games. The High Noon Game Day Pack is back. It includes limited edition faves, pear and cranberry, along with black cherry and grapefruit.

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We've got two games. Two two monday night games yeah yeah two monday night and i think big k you tweeted it but why not every monday i know it's beautiful yeah it's just a little bit easier knowing you got two games tonight and yesterday didn't feel any different no i just think it's better to not have, you know, when it's like nine games at noon, it's way too many. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yeah.

And a six o'clock start here is also best. Yeah. The best. Yeah. We're going to be streaming tonight. Nick will be here. Jerry will be here. Mincy.

I think Jeff D'Lo is in town. That's right. Brown Steelers. What's Jeff D'Lo's goofy ass doing here? His barber's here. Oh. What's Jeff D'Lo's goofy ass doing here? His barber's here. He's a Cali boy now. I have a decision coming up on what to do about hair, and I don't know what to do.

Talk us through it. Well, I... Bald. I guess I moved three months ago, but then I have one trip to New York that I was able to get a haircut. But now I don't have any trips to New York coming up. I don't have any trips to New York coming up to go see Fleischman. And I don't want to go to New York, so I'm going to have to get my hair cut. No, grow it out. I think you should get a little Barry Melrose, a little flip back there.

That would look so sick. Oh, if you went mullet, oh my God. You want me to go long hair? Why don't you go long hair? Yeah. If you went a classy mullet, I'm not talking like. But I don't like when my hair gets over my ears. We'll tuck it behind your ears.

That's what a mullet's for. Yes, lick it back. See, and if it sucks, you have this as a fallback, like the yak guys made you do it. Yeah. But if it's good. How long do you think it'll take to get a mullet? I think you could cut one. If you went tight on the sides right now.

You'd have one now, it would look awesome. Yeah. Yeah. Brandon, do that. Just get tight on the sides. All right, I might go mullet. I like that guy. Yeah.

Oh, my God. You would look so cool. I would actually maybe start to like you. No. I've worked with you for four years. I know. What did I just say? I'd almost start to like you. Just because I get a mullet? Yeah. You've only been here for four years. I know. What did I just say? I almost start to like you.

Just because I get a mullet? Yeah. You've only been here for four years? Four and a half. And just so we're clear, I love Brandon. I don't like him. I know. That's a big difference.

I don't understand that either. What do you mean? That makes perfect sense. Well, no. Would you rather be liked and not loved? I would die for you, but I would also not want to do the smallest of favors for you. That's true. That's a pretty good spot to do the smallest of favors for you. That's true. That's a pretty good spot to be in.

Yeah, I guess. I guess I'd rather have the first one, but the second one I haven't done anything to earn. Yeah, you don't want to be liked and not loved. That's what most people are, right? No, but if we were just general acquaintances, like, oh, yeah, I kind of like that Brandon guy. No, no, I don't. Yeah. I love him. Well, that don't. I love him.

Well, that's good. I dislike him. Well, that's a different, that's a new category. Yeah, I dislike you, but love you. There's not liking somebody, and then there's actively disliking them. Correct, I'm in that. What you just described. I'm indifferent on all y'all. Hypothetic. You could all die.

Wouldn't care. No problem for me. I chay would hit me hard chay's death would really like it wouldn't make sense yeah yeah he's a sunbeam i think he would probably die in a hilarious way oh he'd die in the he'd be the guy jumping off the titanic hitting the propeller you know that guy he's going to die at Buck's training camp. Or like, yeah, he'll die of heat exhaustion standing next to a Gatorade cooler. Really stupid

like that. I have had visions where I die and it's always I get hit by a car. So I don't know when I'm going out, but it'll probably be by a vehicle. Is it the same car every time vehicle it'd be your own people I'm not in it oh shit

damn really be like that really be like that I'm not a good driver. You think? Steven, thinking you're going to go out via car is horrific. Yeah. You have visions?

No, I think it's like I just get smoked and it's over. Just go back? Yeah. Could be worse. Not much. Could be worse. Not much. Uh, nah, dude. How do you guys think you're going to die? Fucking dying could be worse.

I know how I am. Heart attack, standard cholesterol. Not to be a dick, but every time one of you guys, every day one of you guys doesn't get horrific cancer, I think I'm going to get it. Yeah. Yeah. I almost need someone. So you need one of us to get cancer i think i i think i'll probably die in my like 60s with like cancer and then they'll and i'm like i'm gonna fight it and then i'm like this this is this is hard yeah i think that'd be like a great feeling to be like nah i'm not fighting this if you go

before we get the rubber bracelets up on the barstool store though dude yeah brandon i could see heart attack anxiety induced heart attack and you're like mid to late 40s you're gonna choke on chick-fil-a oh shit what have you choked on chick-fil-A? Like Titus' girlfriend's dad just choking it down. You refuse the Heimlich because you want to eat it so bad. Leave me alone. Sucking this thing down. I have a fear of getting murdered. Really?

Yeah, like stabbed or shot. Yeah. That is like getting stabbed would be the worst way to go out. I would agree. Yeah. As you know. I'm afraid of stray bullet. Oh.

That too, yeah. Yeah. I wouldn't mind that if it was a direct hit. Oh, okay. Just like that? I wouldn't. I'd still mind it for sure. I would be like, I don't want to die.

I'd want to be like driving my family around. I'd prefer not to die. Yeah. This is making me nervous. I feel like us talking about it means someone's going to.. I want to be like driving my family around. I'd prefer not to die. Yeah. This is making me nervous. I feel like us talking about it means someone's going to. Someone's going to. No, no. If we were talking about living forever.

Facts. You guys have no wood over there. Bye bye. Technically, everyone who's alive has never died. Tamar Hamlin? Yep. Yep. The city of Huntington, West Virginia.

What's? They get Narcan'd every two seconds. Ad nauseum, yeah. Yeah, it's a sport. Channel West Virginia beating Pitt. Love it. Eat shit, Pitt. Love it.

I was watching it on my phone, trying not to get Faygo on it in front of insane clown posse i texted your dad eat shit pit saturday night and he didn't answer back till sunday at like noon what'd he say back he said yeah thanks no way did he not know oh no oh he's mad at you why is he mad at me i was not oh he said yeah thanks no he didn't say. Maybe. He's an exclamation point guy. He probably said, yes. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

You're right. Yeah. Two exclamation points. Yeah. It was eat shit pit, and then he said, damn right, two exclamation points. Oh, it's very different. Very, very different. But it was a day later?

Well, I texted him at 9.51 when the game ended, and he texted me at 5.06 a.m. Oh, so your telling of this story was so... Yeah, I was way off. In every... I was way off. Yeah. I started asking this question before the show, and then I think it's better that we waited. But now that we have four people that have glasses here...

Sex. Glasses off, right? Yeah, I like to be completely... Holy shit, I never even thought of that. Yeah. What do off, right? Yeah, I like to be completely... Holy shit, I never even thought of that. Yeah. What do you guys do? I don't want to see... Well, it's usually in bed. I don't lay in bed in glasses. I can't see long

distance. Wait, but so do you take it off? You're like, oh, it's about to happen. Hold on a second. No, usually I'll have them off and then the undressing, I'm like, one second. I got to put them on. I'm just like just like damn you know it's more awkward my adult braces yeah yeah yeah yeah and then i uh yeah do you keep them on no off i have worn them before so when you take when your glass is off you're in horny mode you're ready to fuck at any moment. Why? Can you not see right in front of you? My vision is terrible.

So this is what it looks like to be fucked by Stephen Chipps. Right. Wow. I can see colors on the screen. You can't see the screen? I can't. Let me see your glasses. I want to

see how it's bad yeah mine are pretty bad like instant headache yep it's minus 5.25 in each eye oh shit five oh my god oh god dude oh you look good in glasses though this is you look like a totally different person in those yes you look judgmental as fuck a little on there yeah throw them on yeah you need the leather patch okay yeah you know what i'm gonna prescribe you one pussy eating look at that i love that that pussy needs to be go eat one pussy i think you need the full cream pie yeah wow steven yeah if the pussy does if the pussy eating doesn't work we'll wow dosage to a cream pie do you ever forget to see it now gotta be reminded what's that is that you forget to take them off you have to be reminded because

you should use tumor i think you might be legally blind yeah yeah minus five is like super non-minus three pretty much i'm like blind as a bat maybe yours pretty big i'd rather not throw Think you might be legally blind. Yeah. Yeah minus five is like super and I'm minus three much I'm like blind as a bat. Yeah, yours pretty big. I'd rather not throw Yes How long you want from across since like ten years old? Yeah, I was first grade. Damn. You look good in those two KB You're just yeah Shit, this is nothing. I'm not I was squinting and I couldn't see shit. That's brutal. I'm pretty weak, I guess. You look good, too.

You look good in glasses, too. You guys ever think that like 200 years ago before glasses, you would just have died? It would have sucked. It would have just sucked. Who was that NFL player last year who finally got glasses or something? Amos. Amos got glasses. Oh, yeah.

He was like, I had no idea for 10 years. He squinted so much. Yeah. I'm going to try because like we can't be Anus can't be I'm not gonna wear them like that I'm wearing one when I need to see a screen or when I need to see like a movie, okay? I've been loving movies lately saw the departed saw Magnolia saw whiplash. I know he is long. I've only been watching good movies Oh, that's good. That's a smart move a good tactic. I deprive myself so I haven't watched movies for 10 years.

Is Oppenheimer on streaming yet? I don't know. I'm definitely going to see that on my TV. And I loved watching the Jets Cowboys. Oh. Yeah, if you haven't seen a good football game. Micah Parsons is a beast. He's the best.

When I watch that, I'm not like, fuck the Jets. I'm like, the Cowboys rock. Micah Parsons is a beast. He's the best. When I watch that, I'm not like, fuck the Jets. I'm like, the Cowboys rock. Micah Parsons is an animal. He's insane. CeeDee Lamb is an animal. He really is. Now I'm rooting for them. I think they're going to win the Super Bowl.

They look like a very good team. I could see you as a Cowboys fan. You need the Gene Shum. I hate the culture of the fan base, but I love what I saw from the team, and I think they will win the Super Bowl. Wow. You should put a bet on him. Yeah.

He's been betting, too. Yeah, we were out watching Thursday Night Football. Yeah, we've been betting. It makes it a lot more fun. Yeah, it does. I mean, obviously, but. Mook dropped a nuke. Yeah.

Yeah. A little $120 parlay, a lot lot of meatballs and you relapsed on meatballs right last night no i didn't get them yet i'm gonna treat myself this week what are you seeing your queen i think friday did she listen to the podcast yeah what's it oh yeah she didn't think about that yeah she she liked it good she whoa you haven't like love it sure yeah no that makes sense versa brandon in me she what she liked it didn't love it yes yes god actually i think liking it is the perfect response if she loved it that would be that would be kind of creepy yeah because then she'd be like fill me up daddy oh but it wouldn't be that weird i don't think we realize like how small iowa is

because so many people reached out to her. Iowa? People found her? People found her and people that she knew. All we described was how filled her pussy was. Oh, yeah. Yeah, because Iowa, like if you- Oh, I know her.

Iowa's- Yeah, move. What the fuck? That's all the information. We didn't get to say hair color, name. Well, you're right because like- We said're right, because we said Chicago from Iowa photographer. Oh, shit. Also, still, our podcast isn't that big.

We're talking about Iowa. If you go from Iowa to a big city, like Trent, I think is probably the most well-known Iowa. Yeah. Seth Rollins. Slipknot. Ashton Kutcher. Seth Rollins. Well, he's canceled. Yeah. Seth Rollins. Slipknot. Ashton Kutcher. Seth Rollins. Well, he's canceled.

Yeah. Iowa in area, though, is shockingly big. I always thought it was one of the smaller ones, but it's 23rd. It's also a great-looking state in terms of its borders. Would that still be one of the smaller ones? No. It's like middling. My family would be in the middle, but it wouldn't be one of the smaller ones.

Yeah, it's top 24. East and west borders are rivers, which is cool. Yeah, it kind of looks like it was a square and someone sat on it. It's like Arkansas's cousin as far as shape goes. You know what? There's a lot of there. No, it's not.

Arkansas and Iowa are similarly shaped. Iowa? It's square with some curlies on the edges. Yeah, those are rivers. Let me see Arkansas. They're cousins as far as shape. Iowa's flag looks like it's a small Mediterranean

kind of thing. Those are similar. Those are very not similar. Those are similar. I didn't say they were exactly the same. Arkansas is a wood chipper. What? What? What do you mean? Brandon, you know what?

They're kind of the same. Right, they are. Look at them. I think Iowa and Nebraska are the same. No, Nebraska looks like a little pig. Nebraska's long and square and long and rectangular. Arkansas's perky and Iowa's kind of let itself go. Nebraska looks like a pig.

Nebraska looks like Kansas' hat. It's like very wide. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that little piece on nebraska huh well that's fun i like state shapes yeah have you seen uh the netflix show how the states are shaped or no i don't want to be explaining there's a netflix like shows about why the states are shaped like they are i saw wrestlers on netflix they also watch that. I have to watch it. Have you seen it? No, I haven't.

It's great. Matt Jones is your boy, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a little troubling, but it's awesome. What's the show? Wrestlers. What is troubling? There's a scene that will get to you.

Troubling? No, yeah, it's just whatever. Rugs? You got to watch it. No, no. What is the troubling scene? I don't want to give it away to people that haven't seen it. How much trouble?

Nobody's in trouble. Double trouble? Nobody's in trouble. It's a good show. It's a great show. Watch the wrestlers on Netflix. Ben Bishop amount of trouble? That's big trouble.

And no, nobody's in big trouble. What did he do? What is his name? Big Trouble. His name is literally Big Trouble. He got caught up. Well, now I have to watch it. You need to watch it anyway. I know, I know,

I know, but... That was the perfect teaser. There's trouble in it. I know the trouble. What episode is the trouble? End of episode three, and it's not trouble. I don't want to frame it like that. I gotta know the trouble. What episode is the trouble? End of episode three. And it's not trouble. I don't want to frame it like that. I don't want to frame it like that. It's just jarring. That's all. It's jarring.

Trouble is different than troubling. Troubling and trouble are two different things. Troubling is a bad word. Thank you, Steven. Troubling is a bad word, too. Steven makes a good point. It's jarring. How about that?

Jarring. So you see someone get really hurt, and then they get addicted to drugs. I don't know about the drugs, but... You see someone get really hurt. Kind of. Is it on one of the cards? No. They kill their whole family and then hang themselves with their bow flex? Nobody gets harmed.

Is it better than Ip Man? I can't say it's better than Ip Man. Nothing's better than Ip Man. I don't know if I said breaking his ankle off a big boot off the top rope. No. No. Watch Wrestlers. Seven episodes.

It's great. I actually interviewed these people like two years ago before they did this. On what? Wrestling. What's that? It was before Moog's time. Don't. Don't.

I'm not familiar. Don't fuck with me, Moog. Don't fuck with me. Don't fuck with me, Moog. Don't fuck with me, Moog. He's actually not fucking with you at all. don't. I'm not familiar. Don't fuck with me, Moog. Don't fuck with me. Don't fuck with me, Moog. He's actually not fucking with you at all. Joe, pop up. Don't fuck with me. I ain't fucking with you.

I went down a Coffeezilla rabbit hole. Oh, he goes after people. He goes hard. He's very good. Yeah, and he takes it so seriously. Yes. What's he doing? Did he and he takes it so seriously. Yes. What's he doing? Did he put out that new one, like the Theo Vaughn scam kind of thing?

Yeah, what happened? Theo Vaughn got scammed? That's what I watched last night. What happened with Theo Vaughn getting scammed? Basically, this dude in L.A. who has no idea how to run a business, scammed 20 different podcasts out of $4 million. Jesus Christ. It's nowhere to be found.

The money? He was like, I'll be the middleman between you comedians with your podcasts and the advertisers. So he was taking the money from the advertisers, and then he would pay this one, but he'd keep some. And then it was kind of like a Ponzi scheme. It was a classic Ponzi scheme. Is how I got, yeah. Took all the money to give it to new talent while not paying the old talent. And then he would use the bigger talent he had to be like, look, I got Theo Vaughn.

Like, if Theo Vaughn trusts me, you should too. So we reeled in a ton of. But they started a new company that just went public. Yeah. That a lot of shows are on. Yeah. So we owe these people all this money and told them, if you join the new company, you'll get paid eventually.

So he's just trying to like sell his current company. So much did the old von lose i think he he said he's like mid six figures yeah he's a couple hundred thou i know like the fighter and the kid is owed like four hundred thousand dollars fuck this guy yeah no he's a scumbag and when you say they're these podcasts are owed those large sums of money that those podcasts are making that much money yes well because this guy was giving out like minimum guarantees podcasts yeah i know they are i know because i mean the celebrities what the fuck do you know? They do well. Wait, our podcast makes money?

No. Some. That makes sense. Some. Like, Rasslin, for example, did not. Oh, that's a podcast. Yeah, well, was it? He had a couple million view episodes, but who hasn't done that?

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they're delivered directly to your phone. No prints are needed. The app also allows you to easily share tickets with friends via text, so you can get into the game seamlessly skip the hassle enjoy the moment download the game time app or go to the website enter your email redeem code yak for 20 on first purchase terms apply absolutely no comment whatsoever so if you want to have a fun night like that download the game time app i just watched the number one comedian in America. Yeah.

No comment. None. I saw Little Sass had his name up on the billboard. Yeah. That fucking rule. Yeah. That's everywhere. He's like, great to show it.

But he showed them taking it down. Yeah. So, like, we just got out of the show, and they were already taking down Little Sass. It happens like that. Where's the next shows you guys doing? We're in Tampa on Saturday. Beautiful place. While we're in limbo, kind of studio-less, I would love to do a live show.

Okay. Yeah. Just bring people in here as the audience? Yeah, why not? Yeah. We could do a live show. Barstool Bar? Yeah, we could do a live show the barstool bar yeah we could do a barstool bar live show that's a good idea i think i'm hosting an event tomorrow at the barstool bar yeah what are you hosting i want to do the world's first opinion-based trivia oh so that's what's

going on tomorrow uh kind of yeah i'm like uh one of the questions is like who's the most dead person and then everybody has most dead person and then everybody has to stand up and then i'll assign points like pft will be there i guess a couple of other guys oh i love that that's the most dead person that's four points no that's not good can you can you give us a a chaperty question steven oh um give me a minute to think and i will come up with something if anybody wants to come to that and help out yeah I heard their mozzarella sticks are super good and I've been like

howls at mozzarella sticks lately yeah do a review what do you do? no comment they said this guy is 99th percentile size 5 pounds already and I have November 1st but they think it'll be earlier November 1st yeah and so it'll be earlier. November 1st? Yeah.

And so are we going to have a name? Yeah there's got to be a wheel. Wait November 1st? November 1st. How are you going to be able to move? I'm supposed to be going to Miami for ZBT in like mid-October. I don't know if that's going to happen. Oh I don't think so. It's not going to happen. No no no no no.

Imagine giving birth in the air. Whoa. No. You'd have to name your kid, like, Miles. The worst part would be all those people seeing what's going on because... Yeah. Don't worry about it. That's definitely happened, though, right? People give birth on planes? I mean, it has to have happened.

People give birth in their cars? Seth Meyers, the comedian, his wife gave birth in the lobby of their apartment building. What? They say, like, the second and third one gave birth in the lobby of their apartment building. What? They say like the second and third ones like just slip on out. You sneeze. Simon Burch. She sneezed and flew across the room. She sneezed him out.

But he was so small. He was so small. It's different. But yeah, I think it'll be, well, I'm like 35. I think I have like four or five more weeks left. This is going to be pure hell. It's not it's not a good time no cream pies they seem fun don't they beef must have been they're fun for the guy

yeah oh imagine if you named your son cream pie that's good yeah yeah there's gotta be out there somewhere somebody named cream pie Oh, look at that. Oh, that's good. That's really good. That's a good shirt. I love how it's just the cream is off center. I'm liking this. Can you make the gas man look like Mook?

But I think the hose should go down to where the cock would be. So the hose needs to go down to your belt. Yeah, it's almost inside his pants. Yeah. Opening up his fly. But yeah, we're on the right track here. Thanks, Darian. Well, Halloween's coming up.

Are you doing like a cream pie kind of costume? Are you doing a cream pie costume for Halloween? Wait, Kate. Yeah, wait. We were supposed to ask that. Well, you know how guys dress like the Franzia box and then like the tap is where their penis is? Yeah. All night, maybe you're a...

The thing is, being a god, I don't really have to dress up. That's true. That's true. Other people dress up as you. Exactly. That's true. I'm going to figure out what I'm going to be for Halloween. Yeah.

You're not going to be Mook, the cream pie god? You might have to be. I might do that, too. What would that outfit be? I think it would be like a red wig. You'd have to have a bucket of cream, a pail of cream. A pail of cream. And it would have to be like a buck a bucket of cream a pail of cream and would have to be labeled cream yeah and then I think you'd be wearing like robes

and like a halo yeah maybe something some type of velvet yeah like a white gown kind of thing like Jesus yeah yeah like a velvet tracksuit I don't know if you're like cream pie God definitely maybe like kind of adjacent to the do look you know it's not actual like yeah i get you're yeah right yeah right right like a orgy look like a white track suit yeah yeah nadu posted a video of him getting his haircut complimented as like a rebuttal when people make fun of his hair he caught it live yeah like it was like a split it was a live tiktok's like did you see it no i want to see this now and then this girl's yeah good haircut uh she asks like what race he is oh oh no oh no oh i still i follow him my al Albanian brother Yeah Damn

I want to go to Albania with him Yeah? Mm-hmm Okay I bet in Albania he'd do great Yeah Compared to Lancaster? Yeah

Che, you got it? That ain't... That's it. There. Jay, you got it? Oh, yes. Ready? Yes. You have to look at me when I say it. Wait, what? Why? Why?

Well, because I can only say one word. And you have to figure out what the... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why do we have to look at you? Right. You can also hear. All right, fine. I'll look at it. I'll look at you right you could also hear all right final look in the look oh crab crab crab with a b that wasn't a question run that we're playing jeopardy it's an answer yeah it's an answer crab wait you're figuring out what oh your hands again all right

crab crab kind of gay hands okay yeah all yeah. All right. Kind of trumpish. You're going to tell us hot or cold based on our answers? Oh, for our questions. Worst STD you've had? Do we, do we, am I giving like yes or no or hot or cold? Is that the answer? Worst STD you've had? So I'll start simple.

Your favorite food. Wait, am I doing hot or cold? Hot or, how hot or how cold? Okay. Your favorite food. No. The how? Cold. The type of apple tree in your backyard. Cool. Cool. doing hot or cold or is it hot or how hot or how cold your favorite food no the how uh cold the type of apple tree in your backyard cool cool cool the type of apple tree in your backyard very cold allergy that you have cold

you've been warm compared to all the... Wait, what did you say again? Cold. Whoa. Crab. Top five pinch. Oh, it is? Might be a top five pinch. Top five pinch. Whoa.

He is right. Have you, on part of my takedown of Mount Rushmore, pinches? No, we should. Yeah, I think you should. Grandma's cheese. This one actually hurts. Crab. I hate it.

This one. Is that called a goose bite? Yeah, the two fingers. the arm least fuckable. Oh It is the least fuckable creature in yeah, you said cold as hell cold. Yeah, isn't every crustacean No, no Yeah, you could yeah mean you kind of, we could run train on him for shrimp. No problem. It's a fucking key in a hole.

Imagine if somebody walked in on us fucking the same shrimp. Double teaming the shrimp. We're Eiffel Towering, but people can't see the shrimp. No, no, no. There's a girl shrimp. There's a girl shrimp. That should be a t-shirt too. Yeah, we got shrimp dick. The thing you're most scared of in the ocean?

Cold. So you said food? Nobody's gotten warm enough. KB's been the warmest. What's your favorite flavor of potato chips? Hardest to eat because it's so hard to break it open. Yes. That's the answer? But wait, why was everybody else so cold when they said food?

We all said edible things. It actually was a perfect jeopardy. It was cool when he just said food, but then after everyone else's guesses, comparatively, it was very warm. I said something positive about food. It was actually something negative about okay all right give us another one yeah one more it is the worst trivia game here spin the wheel while jade thinks about it is crab the hardest to eat i know yeah what's harder lobster i think crab's harder than lobster oh dear

mother then it's about time it is about time oh god damn it but i'm i promised what how long ago i'd never get wet again so i'm actually not stressing fuck it was about time yeah all right what's what's this guy doing? Oh he's drinking I thought he was Shooting us with his phone Yeah Stefan's back there sipping

Yeah he was sipping We'll hydrate in Stefan Who is going to get wet today? Maybe Kyle and his new glasses? Stefan just put himself on the wheel Have you ever used the glasses washing machine at the airport? What? It's like a car wash for your glasses.

A lot of airports have them. You put your glasses in. You put in like five bucks a sucker. And then you watch as your glasses go through this car wash. I would pay triple that. That's so cool. They come out so clean, it's crazy. It's like you think your glasses are clean.

Highly recommend if you're going to. Yeah. I didn't know that existed. Anyways. Thank you. It's like you think you're glass is clean. Highly recommend it. Yeah. I didn't know that existed. Anyways. Thank you. Let's get this over with. Yeah.

Fuck. All right. I'm ready. Okay. All right Alright 130 degrees Oh The hottest hot tub you've ever been in? No

The temperature you want your steak? No The angle of your shaft to your body when erect No Sauna temp? Sauna temp? Sauna temp? Nope. 130 degrees.

Wait, what did I say first? The hottest temperature you've ever been in? You're not talking about hot or cold. Yeah, you gotta tell us how hot it is. These have all been

pretty cold. Is that what you sear something on? No, uh, cold. Exit angle. Ah. What's that mean? Like in baseball? Launch angle. triangle oh he doesn't know baseball yeah don't don't do that field goal kicking no the name of your boy band cold damn that was my first concert 98 degrees really i had nick painted on my face not for me for lachey nice

yeah my dad was so disappointed i was too old got it no i'm kidding i was young that was even worse what's that desert in california death valley death valley why would that be a chase centric maybe he went there on vacation. Did you go there on vacation? No. Hottest temperature you've ever experienced? No. You're going to say how hot or cold? All these have been very cold.

Very cold? Like, what else could degrees be other than angle? So, how heat? Cold. Angle. Oh, it has nothing to do with temperature? Obtuse angle. Warm.

Whoa. Your favorite angle? Pie with temperature? Obtuse angle. Warm. Whoa. Your favorite angle? Pie. That was Kurt. Favorite angle. You don't have a favorite angle? Oh, yeah. The right.

Err. That might be a little bit warm. What? Favorite angle, but about. You have to be more specific. Your favorite triangle? A football angle. Is it a body angle?

Like 130 degrees bent over? Doggy style? Is this a sexual position? Doggy style. Yoga pose? No. Is this something to do with your flexibility angle? Not flexibility, no.

Not flexibility? Is this like scoliosis? A little bit? No. Okay. scoliosis? A little bit? No. Okay. Wait, what was a little bit? They only depict 130 degrees with their finger. I thought 130 was acute.

No. It's obtuse. Fingering. It's obtuse. It's like close to 180. Oh, shit, yeah. It's got to be very obtuse. Close to a lot.

What's sitting a recliner at? Yeah! TJ! How do you know you're sitting at 1 130 well recliner it was sitting at city best angle to sit in a chair and try and go to sleep at what point does sitting turn into laying that's i think that's and it was ideally when in my mind i was thinking of car seat i guess when when i my question is when you back, how do you know you're at 130? 90?

135 is like half the way. All right, show us, show us. Go sit on the ground and show us 130. All right. All right. All right. All right. Okay. So that's 90?

Yeah. Get it. You can do it on the log do it on the well how's he going to lay you're not going to be able to do that that's 130 that's not far enough back

more a little bit more actually know this I don't think that's far enough back to sleep you got to go a little you got to go two inches you do look comfortable so that's 115 That's far enough back to sleep. You got to go a little. You got to go two inches. You do look comfortable. So that's 150. In a car?

You said it was in a recliner, though. Wait, you're sitting 130 in your car? No shit, you suck at driving. No. Oh. Dude, you low riding? If you're trying to take a nap. Got it.

I don't ever want to play Jeopardy again. It's hard game brandon you give us one no why it's hard but it's also not fun which i really like it's the perfect combo of hard and not fun give us one brandon come on black Brandon, come on. Black. No, I don't know. Y'all do something else. What do you mean? I don't have one. Oh, is this the wet wheel?

Oh, jeez. I forgot. Just get me off this thing. Oh, fuck. Shit. Oh, this is not right TJ's good that's fine

TJ was wet last time oh stop it stop it big body boss man big big body big big dry body. Emphasis on the big body. Triple B.

Yeah. No, this isn't looking good. Fuck. You just go in the alley. Maybe one body armor. Get yourself nice and wet. Be proud of you, brother. I'm still not worried yet.

I'm freaking out. I feel if Kate gets wet, like, she could. Do we have a shower? No, we don't. Sit. No, it's okay. There you go, Kate. I didn't want Kate.

I am worried now. I am worried. No, you're fine. Okay, cool. I guarantee that you're fine. Appreciate it, man. Just trust. You're right. Why am I not worried now. I am worried. No, you're fine. Okay, cool. I guarantee that you're fine. Appreciate it, man. Just trust. You're right.

Why am I not? Trust. I don't like that I'm a white sliver. It's hard to... You're fine. You're fine. Oh. Sit.

Sit. I actually was wrong. Nick, you might be fucked. Here you go. No, I'm not. It's against Brandon. And look what this looks like. It's a fucking Pokeball, dude.

Destiny. That is a... Holy shit. Or a Voltorb. Or if upside down, an Electrode. Could be a Voltorb, you're right. What's a Voltorb? Could be Poland. Alright. What is it, best of?

You want it to land on you. Yeah, you want it four times on you. Die, die, die, die. One nothing. This is a recipe for disaster for you. Nick, this is not right. No, I got my boss's word that I'll be okay. Fuck.

I was really feeling myself when I said that. Because you really believed me. Yeah, I did. Fuck. when I said that. Because you really believed me. Yeah, I did. Fuck. It's still okay. If I don't get it here, I'm gonna start sweating, but I'm not even worried yet. No, don't even worry, you got this. Is this 50-50?

Okay. Yeah, alright, you're on the board! 2-1! There we go. I really needed that. Come on, you need this one. This one is- this one- this one decides it, pretty much. Is there any extra clothes here? No, you're fucked. Alright, no you're sorry i lied to you

that's some little buy stuff right there oh my god you got pulled out you should go in the alley. You got blown out. Make sure your phone's out of your pocket. I'll do it. There they go. Nick is going to be filled in the alley. Alright. Alright. I think Kyle just snuck away to eat.

He's very tatted. Some's very tatted, yeah. Well, some of those are big cats. That's true. Brandon, do you have any tats? I don't. You don't? No, I don't. Would you get one?

I would not. Not even like mostly sports? This body is pure. This is pure. I mean, I treat it like a temple. Yes. Have you been going to bed earlier since you're getting up earlier? I have. I go to bed about 9.30 now. Feeling a change in your life bed earlier since you're getting up earlier? I have.

I go to bed about 9.30 now. Feeling a change in your life? Like, hey, this could be a good thing. You would think so. I did go see the gym yesterday. I joined the gym about three months ago, and I went for the first time yesterday just to scout it out. Still there, yeah?

Yeah. When I got there, there was one girl, she was working out, and she immediately left when I walked in. Yep. And then I stayed for a little bit and listened, scrolled my phone for a while sitting on the bench, and then I left. Perfect. It was very productive. That was quick wet.

Yeah, it was quick wet. There you go. Oh, wow, you are quite wet, though. He's very, very wet. Quite wet. Nice. Looking like very, very wet. Quite wet. Nice. Looks like one of my queens. That's insane, Nick.

What a run. Reset the counter. Reset the counter. You were dry for a full year. Oh, this is the coldest fucking office. Like my wife. Yep. For a reason.

Yeah. Okay. All right. July 29th. July 29th. Wow. Wow. What a run. All right. July 29th. July 29th. Wow. Wow. What a run.

Holy crap. What a run. Okay, good yak, everyone. Go watch the Ryder Cup. It's out now. Is it? Episode one. Of how many?

I made an all-time brain fart move in episode one. But I corrected it. But an all-time brain fart. So, in the drafting of the teams that whole bottle of water trickled down to my ass crack and now it's living it's I'm wearing like compression shorts so like it's like living in it's like my gooch right now it's like oh no that's one little sad drip right here got in you got gooch I got out yeah and once a man's gooch gets wet it's the drying time even with towel very hard it'll never feel dry again no it's i if yeah there are regions of the gooch

that haven't been discovered correct yeah yeah it's all wet gooch terrain again there he is but like yeah act like you know we've all been there yeah we've all been there. Yeah, we've all been there. I can't wait to put a tattoo on you. Yeah, where do you want to go? I don't know. Maybe right here. That's fine. Yeah. Okay, we'll see everyone tomorrow. See you, Yak.

See you, Yak. Good job, everyone. We'll be right back. See you tomorrow. Bye.