The Yak - Mook is Quickly Becoming the Most Powerful Man in Philadelphia | The Yak 8-14-23

Episode Date: August 14, 2023

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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, DJ, pull that up. It's the Yak. It's the Yak. Ayo. What's up? Welcome to the Yak. Since you guys can hear us, that means we are in New York City. Little bare bones of a crew.

Me, Kyle, little Sasquatch, Tommy Smokes. All right. Presented by Roback, the yak. We don't have our papers, but you guys know the drill. Roback head to toe always. Francis, what do you like about Roback? I like how lightweight it feels and how the fabric moves with you through a golf swing. It moves with you, not against you like a lot of other. There's no restriction.

It makes you look lean and athletic. It's very moisture-wicking and absolutely sleek and beautiful. I went on a golf weekend a few weeks ago, wore a rowback for both rounds. Everybody in the group was wearing a rowback. I've got to go golfing tomorrow for the Frankie's thing. I'm going to wear some rowback head to toe. As you should. Are you doing that finally? I'm wearing the fucking socks. Finally. got to go golfing tomorrow for Frankie's thing. I'm going to wear some rowback head to toe. As you should. Are you doing that finally?

I'm wearing the fucking socks. Finally. It's like on its fifth episode. That was the most demeaning. I know. No, Sass was blowing Frankie off. That's not why I meant that. Yeah, he's been talking

about doing it for a while. Well, I wasn't blowing him off. We just never could find a date that worked. I put them two in a group chat. Anyways, use code yakrowback.com. Have you talked to Frankie? Before?

Yeah. Yes. I don't even have Frankie's phone number. Have you talked to Frankie? Before? Yeah. Yes. I don't even have Frankie's phone number. I didn't have it. He texted me. People think you're really good. I texted you. I'm not.

I told them. I was like, dude, I haven't played golf in like five years. They think you're good because of you saying that you're good. Yeah, you say it all the time. All the time. I make you go out of your way. You're a prodigy. I think I said I could beat both of them easily, too, which I can't.

No. No chance. I play golf every single day. Your confidence has to be at an all-time high, though. No. What happened at these shows this weekend? Oh, yeah, the shows were fun. You had a special guest.

Yeah, Shane did the shows. That's insane. It was cool. He did Thursday. I felt bad for the people that came on Friday because I hope they weren't expecting him to be there. No one could have been expecting on the first day. Did it say special guests? No, I think I said something on Son of a Boy Dad, but

no. Did he go before you or after you? Before. Right before. And I told him to do. How was the pop for you after? So the crowd went crazy when he comes out. Dude, you were just like a post-credits scene in a Marvel movie.

I told him to do after. I was like, can you please go after? He went before you? He was like, no, I'm going before you. He was like, you have to be able to go up after me. That's really cool of him. Fast is the headliner. Yeah.

Yeah, I agree. And then he was like, dude, Rogan did 30 minutes before me in Vegas. And I'm like, dude, the difference between Rogan going before you and me and you going before me is not even close to the same thing. Is he like saying Rogan is someone? He was like, I had to follow Rogan that you could follow me. I'm like, not even remotely close. I wouldn't think people would much rather see Gillis than Rogan. I was Vegas on a stand-up.

So the pop was insane? Yeah, I can't even tell if I'm talking into this thing because it's fucking all the way over here. But yeah, it was nuts. It was wild. That's fucking awesome.

I'm sure it was for you, too. Shout out to Tyler from Wheeling. He went all the way. Oh, really? To see you. Him and his wife. Fuck yeah. Yeah, it was fun. Oh, really? To see you, him and his wife. Fuck yeah. Yeah, it was fun.

He DM'd both me and Kyle. His wife loves you. His wife has a huge crush on you. No, I didn't meet a lot of people. He's handsome as well. He is. You can finagle away into that group. Yeah, totally.

That'll be a fun thing. It's good that Shane came because then the people who spent so much for the tickets got their money for it. Your tickets are so expensive. They are, dude. My tickets are the same. Dude, I don't even control the prices. How much for the tickets? $25. That's the standard price. But then there's

taxes and fees. The fees for his shows. Francis, your tickets are the same price. Your fees are insane. I don't know. I heard about your fees. I don't control any of it. I could buy 25% of a dozen ticket with that price. And then a lot of the time Sass will say, if you pay another $25, you'll do the meet and greet.

But then he doesn't come out for the meet and greet. And then he puts up a tweet saying there was a family emergency. But he was just in the green room not doing anything. You should do a meet or greet. They try to make me... Everyone wants me to do meet and greets, and they want me to do merch,

and I'm like, I don't want to do any of that. What kind of merch would it be? I don't know, but I'm like, they're already spending... This is fucking insane. This is going to drive me nuts. Yeah, they're spending so much on the tickets. Yeah, I might have to.

But, uh... They're already spending money to come to the show. Spending so much. Would a VIP ticket be like a Sass t-shirt and a meet and greet with the man himself? I don't know. I'm never going to do that. Get the mortgage your fucking house for that. Yeah.

I'm never going to do that. That's also the thing. I'm not going to be like, yeah, I'll take a picture with you if you pay me. It's fucking insane. That is the essence of a meet and greet, right? Yeah. I'll just take a picture with someone if they want a picture. They have like you like talking to a hundred people

lining up. You would melt into a puddle. Thanks for coming out. They were just like, yeah, I met Sass afterwards and he was a douchebag. They'd be like, well, you didn't pay for it. You know who charges for meet and greets? Pat.

You gotta specify. His is an M-E-A-T in greet. He fucks your ass. Whoa. He does a fucking greet. Do you think the greet comes after the fuck or before the fuck? Yeah, he comes. He's like, nice to meet you.

Fucking greet. My pleasure. We should ask him about that. Fuck me me you haven't even greeted me yet i agree with you i think it's uh i think it's taking advantage of an audience that's already paid to see you to charge more feels ridiculous to me also a pretty young like a right but like people that are coming to my shows are in college i'm like i'm not gonna make them no for sure i get it um i get it for like like a huge band that makes sense because there's fans that would love them and they're going to be so far away like your shows are pretty intimate already yeah i get it i get it for a theater when you're like i can't possibly meet 1500 2000 people after the show although theovan does yeah he goes and he talks to everyone.

He goes out into the atrium, the area in front, and then he will take a picture with every single person. Wow. That's a really cool 2,000-person show. But that's borderline unsustainable. It's just you're going to get COVID. Yeah, it's crazy. But yeah, it was great.

It was so fun. That club is fucking insanely good. It's phenomenal. Sorry, my mic is. Scoot over. Why don't you scoot? Why don't you scoot over? Scoot at this point.

I'm already locked in. No, no, no, no. We're not going to be able to handle you complaining about it for the rest of the show. No, I will complain about it the whole time. What is the issue with it? So the blind. It just won't, it won't go like that or it won't stay up. It keeps going back down.

If only there was a solution. See? Twist those knobs, brother. Those knobs are twisted all the way tight. Other working microphones. It's driving me crazy. At this point, I need you to move seats. I need you to move seats.

God damn it. So the blind side's fucking fake. Yeah. It kind of is. Who knows? What prompted prompted that it was going crazy it's breaking the internet breaking news today wait what happened the family like tricked him nice and nice and close now the tui family one of these uh michael orr has now come out and said that the

paperwork he signed to be legally adopted by the Toohey family, that family from the story, he didn't realize, he thought he was becoming their adopted son and a member of the family. But he's, as he put it, he just learned in February of 2023 that he, I guess, looked back at the paperwork and saw that it was actually just a conservatorship, which would enable them to have some control over his finances. They, uh... They're taking advantage of him. Oh, my God. And he just found this out? Yeah.

Yeah, so now he's trying to have it all dissolved because he thought he was being adopted. What dissolved? The paperwork. Whatever agreement they had. Is he trying to start a lawsuit? What is he trying to do? I guess so. That's pretty fucked up.

Did they make a statement? Doesn't Mincy brag that he's friends with his family? Always. This isn't that shocking. This doesn't have a happy ending. Of course not. This rich, white, southern family takes in this huge black guy. Let's make him play football.

I actually assume way worse than what's going on. If you read a two-sentence summary of The Blind Side, you'd be like, yeah, this family's taking advantage of this boy. Well, I love white savior stories. Sure. Watch the Green Book. Exactly. But so is Blind Side. And Blind Side, I don't remember there being an outcry

of us, the White Savior story. It was before. Yeah, it came out a little delayed. Brandon had been crying about that since the movie came out. We should just do a White Savior movie marathon, just pat each other on the back the whole time. Maybe we had a White History Month that we could celebrate. Yeah, if only there was time.

Did you ever have these type of fantasies when you were tutoring? Not really, because I had to do it for money. And I couldn't... What do you mean? I don't know. Like someone who would be more unlikely to go to Harvard. Mentor them to... Yeah.

Well, I tried once to do something altruistic. Because I was primarily tutoring very wealthy families on every side. Okay. Never mind. But I had some free time. Saving white. Yeah. I saw a, I don't know, some kind of news story about a charter school in Deep Brooklyn that was almost like a last chance you type place um for high

schoolers and i went out there to volunteer and they basically immediately gave me an entire class of 16 kids to be to teach them math it was an after-school program it was during school how did that go well it was a disaster it was a disaster. It was a disaster. Just levels to disaster. Were they assaulting? In my class of 16 kids, four of the eight 16-year-old girls were pregnant. That's just unfortunate. I know. And they all told me they were on birth control.

Yeah, that's on. Wander Franco was on. I just saw them there. I couldn't believe they lied to me. Unbelievable. I taught an adult literacy class in Columbus, Ohio, and they just gave me a class of like 14 adults. What is adult?

Is that literal adult literacy? Just adults learning to read and write? They were all English second language. I taught, yeah. How did that go? I was not, I thought it would be a nice thing to do. You know, I was hoping to do it so I could get pussy, you know, afterwards. Like, I'm saying I'm such a good guy.

No, never happened. Literate girls give the best fuck. No, no, I'm leaving class and bragging to the regular people. Oh, got it. They have to, Tommy. They have to. Is anyone still like neurotypical but illiterate? Yeah, well, people that like move here.

Besides that. I think Marty Mush might be. It's the most extreme version of I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart. Yeah. I definitely said that when I was younger. Yeah, you said you weren't a good test taker? Yeah. Just tests aren't my strength.

That's all of school. Yeah. Didn't have any strength. They all thought they were going to be like the next Mark Zuckerberg. They're like, oh, Mark Zuckerberg dropped out of college Like I don't need school It's like Mark Zuckerberg went to fucking Harvard Yeah

You can't do basic trigonometry So a billionaire when he was 19 years old He dropped out because Peter Thiel gave him a fucking angel investment Of however many millions of dollars it is It's like the writing was on the wall Staying at school would have hindered him Same with Bill Gates Same with Matt Damon

Matt Damon had just fucking been nominated for Won the Oscar for best screenplay for Good Will Hunting What school was he in? Harvard He was in Harvard as well Natalie Portman was in fucking Star Wars Yeah How far down the list of notable alumni

Are you on the Harvard page? I'm not on the list You're not on the page? I'm not on the list. You're not on the page? I'm not on the page. It's got to be like, there's got to be like. Can you pull up the wiki? How many are on the page? It's got to be like the notable alumni.

It's a lot. I got removed from my high schools. Think a lot of presidents and a lot of Supreme Court justices and a lot of actors and people you wouldn't even. B.J. Novak went there fucking uh darren aronofsky went there some really random people so it's its own oh my god yeah you're fucked man yeah i have i'll have to do something horrific to get on this list i mean i'm gonna do you have a wikipedia page i don't think so are you on on your high school's notable alumni? Fuck no.

Do you think you're one of the top 10,000 most notable Harvard alumni? Probably not. I feel like you got it. 1636 when they started the school. No, because there's probably so many dudes who are just business fucking running some empire. There's princesses and princes here. When I went to my five-year reunion, I sat at a table that was very clearly the failures. It was like me and then a handful of people

who were battling addiction. This is Harvard's five-year reunion? What kind of convention center? What were they addicted to? Pills. Okay. Fucking any, name it. They were having a hard time.

But I bet you they overcame it and wrote a bestseller. Yeah, so maybe, oh my God. Are they embarrassed of you? They don't, I don't factor. I'm not on anyone's radar. I am irrelevant. They don't even hit me up for fundraising. What if you did a set there, a show?

Would it sell? At Harvard? No. I don't think so. I don't know if we have any Harvard listeners. That's Boston. There's got to be. I don't know.

I've never met one or even heard about them. Maybe like grad school. Or MIT. austin there's gotta be i don't know i've never met one or even heard about school or mit i will say that i got asked i got asked to come back and speak on a panel um to the men's and women's lacrosse teams which was kind of fun it was like a career panel okay and they had me and then there was like a dentist a computer scientist and someone who worked in finance and like a doctor and we all they were asking if they did a q a and they were like asking us questions and and someone who worked in finance and like a doctor. They were asking, they did a Q&A and they were like asking us questions.

I was just doing like, I was just telling jokes pretty much. Being on a panel would be a blast. It's fun, yeah. Were you killing? I crushed. I said something. They were like, one by one, tell us your favorite memory of playing lacrosse at harvard and someone was like the year that i got to play with my sister someone was like scoring a winning goal against fucking princeton or whatever and got to me and i was like showers easily yeah i used to

play this game where i would cover my eyes and see if i could identify the person just based on their penis and i got very good at it you could do it. You could do it by just... No, no. Why would you cover your eyes? Only looking at their dick down. Oh, got it. Looking at their dick. Cover your eyes in such a way? Did I know who it was?

Yeah, because you don't want to see their top half. That's the... The way you were covering them just now looked like you couldn't see anything. You were stealing penis. I guess you're right, Tommy. It's like I'm shading my eyes. Yeah.

So top down. Yeah, because you... I said that to the whole panel and that's when they took the mic away from me. But the crowd, the whole room, men and women were all laughing hysterically, which was good. What's the bone you have to pick

with your high school, Kyle? Are you looking at me? No, nothing, nothing. This will sound bad. You're crinkling the hacky sack. Do you want to stand up and fucking hacky sack? Yes. Piper appreciated you coming over to feed her so much.

She was purring. Oh, my God. And thank you for the video, too, that meant a lot. We missed her dearly when we were in Reno. Yeah, me and Piper were playing for a while. I was there for like 20 minutes just fucking around with Piper. Fun cat. Yeah, it is a fun cat.

One, two, two. All right. Did you say your record was 86? I had the record at school. I had 99. This is seven, eight, nine, ten. That was good. Did we give one for the header?

That was good. Sloppy as hell. Very nice. Is it easier to go inside the foot or is it good to do toes? Side, I think bottom heel. Wow, nice. All right, 10's the record. Nick, you want to see if you can one-up that?

I'll try. Sack it up. Yeah, see, they both go side foot. Oh, Nick's got control. You can tell this is not his time. Yeah, I believe the 100 now. That's really good. We both had the school record.

I don't have the right shoes on. We both have a record. We did. We did. We both have the record. I remember when I had the record. I was crowned the record holder. I got 86.

I mean, I believe you got more, but I still had the record. This is not going to go well, I feel. I fear. Yeah, I can't do that. I don't know. I'm going to embarrass myself. I get on here, and I freeze up. Out there, I to go well, I feel. I fear. Yeah, I can't do that. I'm going to embarrass myself. It sucks. I get on here and I freeze up out there. I'm stalling on my neck. I saw Kyle do 36. They were doing one. I think that seems to be the

play. One. Why didn't you start with your foot off the ground? You dropped it onto your foot and rolled off. A little cheat code. That was two. I would go knees. Does it count?

Can you go knees? Does it count just dropping it on your foot as one? Does that count? No. No. It's like doing a pull-up and jumping up to the bar and counting that as one. One. Put your foot down in between.

Tommy, what's the matter with you, man? Oh, my God. I think I might be physical. I don't think I can say that word. Yeah, you could say that word. You're not my friend now. You're just dropping it on your foot. Yeah, my God. I think I might be physical, but I don't think I can say that word. Yeah, you could say that word. You're not Mike right now. You're just dropping it on your foot.

Yeah, you're just dropping it on your foot. Praying that it, like, ricochets. Stop doing it that way, Tommy. You gotta try a different method. Leave your foot on the ground and then come meet it.

No, no, put your foot down every single time. Every time? Yeah. All right. Boom, down, up. Chicago. There you go. That was three., up. Chicago. There you go.

That was three. Chicago boys. I know. This is like a fucking. We have a hacky sack room in the new office. I know. I can tell there's a change of pace already. You want to give it a whirl?

You guys are moving quick. Yeah, I'm pissed that I wasn't here last week for all the hubbub. All the hubbub. It was the hubbub. All the hubbub. It was the hubbub. Were you here? He was here. I don't think I was here. He bought the company back.

Oh, that hubbub. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was hubbub. People are calling it the greatest business deal of all time. Saw that. Has it affected your behavior since? Like your workplace behavior? Your promotion?

Yeah. Your choice of words? I heard you were on one on was it friday you're trying to get some juicy deets let's just say that what the hell was that about and and i know you you were probably so panicked afterwards well i didn't know that i had done something bad until everyone started telling me and then i then i panicked well it wasn't cut from the episode was it no the only thing that was well what i learned what i learned by the way by the way why they took

that episode down was because of the drug talk yeah near the ad. I think that's okay to say. That's a totally legitimate thing from our beloved sponsor. And I think it was like the ad read ended and you could see Stephen Che immediately ask me, what hard drugs have you done, Francis? And if there had just been some space

in between that, I think it would have been fine. But I don't know for sure. So what were you saying that was so, so bad and not... I don't... Honestly, I don't even want to get into it. What had you feeling so rambunctious? It's still up.

I mean, you can all... You can just go and listen. Okay. I listened. I didn't know that certain things that I was bringing up were not meant to be brought up. And I don't... I don't want to step in it again. So I'm going to fucking leave it there.

Well, everything you brought up was already public, right? Or no, they were both pretty private. Right now, I feel like you're doing what I was doing on Friday. And I'll tell you what, amigo, it's a dark path. Oh, are people still getting, like, calls? Mm. Oh. That's a no.

I'm sure that's a no. Anyone high up? This would be my last yak ever. No't know it's fine i can't come on the show we're on the home stretch we can't going here dave owens stand up in hacky sack man get it all out wearing these fucking espadrilles man they slip right off you're really bohemian today yeah i know well uh i don't know i don't love what I'm wearing to work today. But by the way... What time did you get here today? 9.40.

Nope, because I was here at 9.40. Didn't see you. I feel like I can prove that. That's when you got in? I got in here a little bit earlier than that. I guess the day after the announcement where you were texting us. You don't think that... Did you look at the clock?

You got in at 9.40, man, on the dot. What's going on here? Busting chops. There's some real tension between you two. Well, it's the rivalry. The rivalry, yeah. I was told that I just have to be mean. I might not be allowed on here.

Damn, dude. We're surrounded by idiots, Kyle. Fucking idiots. These are the New York goats? These are your kings or your champions? Okay. Yeah, good luck.

Oh, man. To answer the question about how my behavior has changed now that we are no longer part of the old situation, when I see cleavage now,

I don't look away. Yeah. You've been really hard in the office. I do a little grabbing. I hold. Okay. Is it a hold, though? It's more caring than that. You gotta

elaborate. You do have to elaborate. He's elaborating right now. Dude, I had the worst omen possible happen to me in chicago about it i think about it too i think about the cleavage you think about it do you think who's are you picturing right now oh you know i do you text me about it all the time comedy is now legal what were you saying uh so i was in Chicago this past week Staying for the weekend Went out to grab a beer with Rudy at this beer garden

We had this nice talk like is this the right move Like you know New York is doing comedy Like we were nervous it was this big transition We've gone through a lot of changes you know If I may really quick we never have those talks We don't doubt our decisions Oh cool I can disprove that

Dig into the iMessage doubt our decisions. Oh, cool. Back to you. Oh, no, no. Cool. You might be on your own there. I can disprove that. You're fast, Frank. Let me dig into the iMessage. Yeah. I was shooting off essays to KB and Nick. 8 a.m. At my desk. Well, you have a lot more to lose. You did make a terrible decision.

I don't know why you wouldn't. Stick with the iMessage. Sass was like straight up full essays, just like bibliography. He had the elements of style next to him. It was well written. Sass says he made 7.15 last week. Like, are we going in right now to the office on the day after Dave ripped everyone apart

for being late? Sass was on his game? Yeah. I don't know. But no, me and Rudy were having these talks and we were like, no, this is a good place to be. The office, everything's good.

No doubts. We were just talking. We're excited to see where this is going to go. We walk out of the bar, just us on the street, and we hear this rustling above us, a tree above us. And a crow falls from the tree, spasms, and dies right in front of us.

What the hell? Horrible. Yeah, that sounds hell? Horrible. Yeah, that sounds poetic. Horrible. It's like the poem. That is the worst omen. Galbatrons or something. That is the worst omen.

Quoth the raven nevermore. It did nothing more after it died right in front of us, spasming. So did you contact your New York landlord to extend? No, I called Kelly Keegs to make sure it was okay. I called Kelly. She's like, eee. I was like, what? She lit candles for me and Rudy. Then we keep

walking. Is she a witch? She practices. We keep walking and about an hour later, we leave another bar and a black cat runs out in front of us. Oh my lord. Not good. Not great. What? That is the...

That is so not true. It's just like part of like Halloween fun for kids. I mean, it's a thing. It's a thing that happened. This is horrible. And then we keep walking. We're just like, she's like, kind of freaked out. And this drunk woman comes up to us and puts

one hand on my chest, one hand on Rudy's and she goes, you guys are meant to be here. And then walked away from us. Oh, my God. The weirdest night. Was she like... We're fucked. She was a Barstool fan? No, I don't think.

Did not fit the demo. Huh. But that would be the... She's cleared it up. She's the final say. Yeah. And in spite of these negative omens, that woman was the final verdict. You are in

fact meant to be. All three of these things were black. I would trust I think the first two were signs of God testing you. You know? Okay. And then the final one said, put your mind at ease. Okay. Made the right decision. Yeah. Scary, scary, scary.

We would have left that bar 30 seconds earlier. The crow has landed on our head. That's crazy. It's horrifying. Have you guys ever cupped a bird in your hands? No. Jason? In the booth?

You said emphatically yes. A big smile. Jason's kind of going viral on Twitter right now. People are like, we've got to learn more about him. Wait, why. What did you do? A big smile. Yeah, a really big smile. Jason's kind of going viral on Twitter right now. People are like, we've got to learn more about him. Wait, why? What's going on? There was a tweet.

I don't know what account it was. He won the Barstool Beast Award, didn't he? Did he? No, no, no. People were just like, I need to learn more about this character. There was a video of him right before Dave's announcement. There was a video of him right before the rundown running, sprinting, telling Dave. Didn't you win the Barstool Beast jacket? No. they didn't give it to you for that i don't think

they're doing that i think they suggested it and then people clowned on it too much and they just quit it's fucking people being ridiculous it's 500 i mean that part would be nice exactly um should we learn about jason yeah when did you cup a bird because you um oh that was like in like middle i just really like birds like i think they're kind of funny looking and there was just a bird just chilling uh on like my back like my parents back porch when i was in like middle school and i just had a piece of bread and just like kind of chilled in my hand for a few minutes and ate some bread it was was it a baby bird you know bird? You know, I don't know. Because then if your scent's on it, the mother will reject it. So you sentence that thing to death.

Is this you sprinting? Watch this. Here he comes. Guy working in there, and he was like freaking out, and he just left the room. I'm a stay-at-home dad at work. Like, dad's out. If you want to stay at home, go work somewhere else.

But, like, either be in the office or don't work. Hell yes. Nice. Highlights. Yeah. So you're, um, what are some, like, what is your background? Because I've heard about music. What is your music background?

Oh, my family is just like, oh, there's a lot of musicians in my family. I went to school for performance. And there I just kind of did a couple gigs, like, helping churches, like, singing solos for them. You sing? You're a singer? Used to be. I don't sing anymore because I can't... I don't have the time or, like...

The time? Singing. Yeah, it's like... You do that in the shower. Well, yeah, but if I want to, like, hone my craft, if I want to get better at it, I don't have the time to invest. Also, I don't know how to play piano,

so it doesn't sound as good just singing by yourself in a little room kind of thing. Were you were singing like opera uh mostly just like hymnal stuff but i opera is like a completely different kind of music that's really hard to sing you went to school for performance yeah i minored in music specifically in performance are you i'm trying to remember from from the crossword groups i feel like you've come over are you fluent in another language or am I making that up? I mean, I've learned a lot of words of different languages just because, you know, song, like good classical songs are in like old German.

Latin, right? French. Yeah, like Latin. did get me into the preferential GA seating at a concert because there was a little old German woman who was checking tickets for it, and I recited old classical German poetry to her. She was like, you're a good kid. You can go in.

And I got to see a good fish show because of that. Wow. What a perk. Preferential general admission seating. tee you up or you just rattled off a whole poem in german she had a she had a german accent i was like oh i'm you know working on learning uh dare lyerman right now so and she's like oh i know that one and you know we talked i recited some of it didn't sing because i was uh very intoxicated on multiple substances and then she just let me in now what video games do you play on the competitive circuit uh melee super smash

bros melee definitely the nintendo gamecube released in 2001 uh amazing game that i need to be careful playing because it again makes me want to have controlled substances. But that game is astounding. It's like a gateway drive. So it might not be the games or the languages. No, no, no. It's great because I need to focus. And there may be prescription medication that helps you focus.

I'm sure the competition guys are on heavy doses of Adderall. Yeah. Have you been to a tournament worst smelling thing i was going to describe this stench oh my god i've been to pokemon tournaments magic and yugioh yugioh is the worst smelling tournament yes is it does it smell worse than a yugioh show a competition it can't there's no way so i went to a melee tournament i went to day two or three of a melee tournament. They hadn't even showered once since they'd been there. Yeah, that was nauseating. I think I saw someone get up from a seat,

and there was a definite brown stain from it. They're shitting, too? They're not just body odor guys? They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything.

They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything.

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They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything.

They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything.

They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like, everything. They're like everything their butt back and then like you know pants come down asses against just like just random hotel chair a lot of game tournaments now are mandating hygiene and they can kick you out and people are up in arms which makes it smell even worse but because now they're protesting now they're purposely not showering but they're like fuck this i'm just across the board i'm not doing hygiene they just don't do it is it like a lazy thing or yeah why

do you think, yeah, what is like the correlation between liking to play video games and disliking showering? Like they shouldn't logically. I think it's just so addictive. It's like an anxious personality trait.

Right. You're depressed maybe. Yeah, I don't know. Put an adult going to a Yu-Gi-Oh tournament. They're so close to their shower. They're playing like. Their brains are destroyed by immediate reward.

So the thought of just taking 10 seconds to 30 seconds to do something uncomfortable is just too daunting. Like the kids who would go shovel down their dinner from when their mom made them eat. I would do that. That's normal. I will say I usually shower before I play video games because I can't focus if I'm dirty, if I'm all like gross, if my hair is all greasy. Did you just get used to the smell at the tournament or uh no that was one of the main things that made me just want to stop is like

i was roommates with a bunch of people who were like really good like best in the state and then i went to a couple tournaments with them i was like this smells bad i'm not having fun and losing a lot i'm just gonna go home and i hyper-competitively because of that. So your roommate, what state? New York. New York. So they're the best in New York. So they're probably the best in the world or amongst?

New York and Southern California are the two best regions, basically, in the world. Are they making money? Some of them but like you can look up like how much certain like melee pros make uh based on like tournament and naturally a bunch of them are like youtubers as well and like it it's not easy to be uh like make money off of it but if you're like top five it it can be your full-time job but you gotta be top five in the world now melee you you play on like a crt tv correct yes because of the lag or something so yeah uh tube tvs uh just because of rca components with a gamecube or a wii because when that came out nintendo was still very slow and wouldn't put in

an hdmi so uh the crt makes it just way better to actually play the game could you show us just a short snippet of gameplay so that we have a frame of reference or singing I was actually wondering that too would you ever be willing to sing for us a song a shy singer Stanko

I want to hear Stanko sing but he's good yeah he's got very jason morales vibes we're all yeah that like that i mean that one yeah yeah so we have right now they're going so fast they're so fast character fox and jigglypuff? Jigglypuff is pretty commonly used, right? That's my go-to. Jigglypuff is kind of like... Jigglypuff is not like one of the top three or four characters,

but certain people just play Jigglypuff because it just makes the game harder to play for the other people. That one guy is legendary who only uses Jigglypuff. Hungrybox. Is that him? Someone threw a crab at him once at a tournament. Like a real ass crab. Is there a video of that?

Yeah. The fans are ruthless. Look at that arena, dude, for a GameCube game. That's Evo, baby. This is when Evo was peaking for Melee. Evo was peaking here? What's Evo? Evolution is the largest fighting game tournament in the world.

Happens in Reno or something like that. Actually, if someone was in the Reno area last week, they were in... I was. Oh, wow. I could have gone to Evo. I was just in Reno. Well, Tahoe, but I went to the airport. What a beautiful area.

It really is so nice. Holy fuck. The drive from the airport. The mountains. The late Arsan city. He gets real confusing. You'll see. Pause. Find one woman.

Mad Men. That's number seven. Is that... Oh, yeah. Alright. Got her nice front row seat Talking to mango one of the other best male pretty white to I thought the black Isn't the black community beastly at this black community loves yugioh

Sonic Fox is one of the best fighting players of all time, but he's not a melee guy. Is he pissed? Oh, yeah. Who the fuck threw this? Who threw this at me? Is that a real crab? Yes. Dead? Did someone admit to it? Like, yeah, it was me. Why would you throw something?

It's a crab, not something. It's a crab, dude. It's way more than something. You gotta say what it was. You know how hard I worked on here? Oh, no. Oh, man. Oh, crying? I'm gonna be close. It was. Crying?

He's close. Why a crab? This was in Maine. Or Maryland. They just had it on him. Oh, there's a crab in his pocket. I don't think this is... Oh my god, there's a crab in these jeans.

Look at this fucking crab! Do you think he just had a crab in his feet? 100%. I'm going to bring this with me. He probably brought it as a snack and then got full off of fucking G Fuel or some shit. I was like, I'm just going to get rid of this crab. Anybody want this crab? I'm just going to chuck it at this guy. Also, do you know how hard I work at this?

I mean, that's ridiculous to me. Why. Also, do you know how hard I work at it? I mean, that's ridiculous to me. Do you think you could do that? No. I'm saying, if we had the opportunity to make a living playing video games, I would never... These guys put in more work than anyone. Are they doing drills? As far as hours. Are they doing drills?

They don't have any social life. No, I know, but why is it why is it this job? Blue collar. Why does it work? Are they doing drills? I think it's just as much work as like typing in data into an Excel sheet.

Professional video game players or us? I'm not even saying. I would never say that about us either. I'm just making, I'm drawing a comparison. I'm asking. I'm not even saying, I would never say that about us either. I'm just making, I'm drawing a comparison. I'm asking. I'm simply asking. What about that? It's conversation five.

What about that? I mean, think about how many people play video games and how good you have to be to be the best. It's like, more people play video games than do, I don't know, what's a good comparison to that? Like, millions and millions of people. I guess I would say that there are probably people who play video games as much as that guy does. Yeah. And they're not telling people. No, they would know.

You know how hard I work at this. Because they're not as good. Right. So imagine you're doing like accounting. Get through tax season. Really tough. You get people huge returns. Then somebody throws a fucking crab at you, dude.

You're going to yell at the person that does it and say do you know how hard i've been working if someone threw a crab at me at the end of accounting season i have a lot of questions i might say yeah do you know how hard i work at this yeah yeah it's the breaking point yeah i get that can we hear the crowd reaction when the crab is this has potentially my favorite video he just lost no wonder he's pissed even Didn't even hit him Didn't even hit him He's throwing out He didn't even come close Might not have even

Been aimed at him So Jason He just lost That kind of Yeah that's Now TJ For So we can watch a happier

Melee Can we see the wombo combo I would love to see that The wombo combo Is very Very impressive Yeah wait Francis I would love to see that. The wombo combo is very, very impressive. Yeah, wait, Francis.

Happy feet. Wombo combo. That ain't Falco. That ain't Falco. Happy Feet to Wombo Combo. Oh, my God. Get your ass up. Without the crowd reaction, I would have assumed that was just a regular video game. Yep.

I can't wait for my friends to come back to their houses so I can play video games. Yeah. You've been so excited. Holding out. I just haven't had anyone to play with. Now, Francis, did you get impressed? I don't know what happened. Francis, that's like the equivalent to if you dropped a YouTube special and it got 50 million views in one day.

Doing a wombo combo? That's what the wombo combo is. Is it between two players? They're batting someone back and forth? I mean, yeah. It's just the idea that just... So the entire idea of Melee, I think, is built on just disrespect. Just how much can you fuck with another person? And that whole match was like a crab perfect.

The Denny's versus IHOP crew battle, which is... What? What is that? Of course. Lest we forget. They got like 10 play... So after most Smash tournaments, people go to Denny's or IHOP, and there's a very big argument between Denny's or IHOP.

And one time they got always just close to the venue. Boys, we got to do a video on this. Basically, you're at like a hotel. I need you to go investigate all of this. They usually are adjacent now that I think about it. They pick out their venue based on what's like right in the middle of a Denny's and an IHOP. The battle is between these. Please commit right now to doing a video.

This is what I'm struggling with. Can I tell you what I'm struggling with? By all means. Okay, so we all love playing video games. I love playing video games i love playing video games right i don't really yeah i don't like it you don't like it i play like i'm not it's always fun it's a nice in your life you've enjoyed playing don't do it as much as i'd like to do okay but it's fun yeah it's fun it's fun undeniably right and yes obviously there are people

who are so talented without a doubt this whole esports craze. Everybody knows at this point that the level of skill that a top gamer has versus a recreational one is similar to being a wide receiver in the NFL versus playing touch football, whatever. I don't know. What I struggle with here, again, with the do you know how hard I work at this, is that I do believe there are people who are addicted to playing video games who are playing as long as and committing as much time in a day to playing those games as those professionals. Do you agree with that or no? Why'd your mic go off? You got cut. Your mic got cut yeah

am i not you're back you're back allowed to say now you're back you're good i think and and yet those people know that it's not work right to me yeah you're right like are they are they lying to themselves like they're having fun i'm trying to think of this parallel would work i don't think they're having fun i think they trying to think if this parallel would work. I don't think they're having fun. I think they are incessantly frustrated and are addicted. As soon as you get really good at video games, I'd imagine video games aren't fun anymore.

Do you think your average football player has fun during an NFL game? Probably depending on the result of the game. That's a really good question. Thanks. All I know is when I'm dropping into Al-Masra At 8pm on a Wednesday night I'm not thinking this is going to be fun I'm thinking I'm going to war right now

I'm going to a battle Someone threw a crab at you in the middle of that What would you yell? I would kill them Legitimately, I would gouge their eyes out There we go I'm trying to think about Imagine you're a porn star right and a male porn star okay

oh okay damn it i mean you're just you've just finished someone throws a crab at you just finished a shoot you just finished a shoot and someone throws a crab at you would you yell do you know how hard i work at this or would you recognize that everybody wants to have sex and that to have achieved a level of it where you're getting paid for it um should render you uh grateful enough as to not be put off by something like that and then refer to it as work i mean regardless of whether you i mean if you respect it or not, he was at the biggest moment of his life and failed, and then a crab hit him. Nearly hit him.

I don't even disagree with him. I don't even, I just, I'm trying to frame it to me as like... You don't like the, do you know how hard I worked? Yeah. No one liked that. The petulance of that. You really didn't like it though, Francis.

Yeah, correct. I also will say, I feel like... I agree with the porn star take. I loved it. You really? Yeah. You really didn't like it though, Francis. Yeah, correct. I also will say, I feel like... I agree with the porn star take. I think that's a good comparison. Everybody likes sex. Everybody likes video games. But I don't think anyone...

I don't think the amount of video games that he's playing is an enjoyable amount. I don't think he's, like, been playing fucking Super Smash Bros for 70 hours

over the last three days and he's like i'm still having fun playing this you know when i feel like i need to win it becomes your job it's probably yeah what is what gets him off like he he always wins yeah i have no idea i don't know how those guys when he loses it's the worst thing imagine yeah explain the ihop denny's yeah so people just felt very strongly about IHOP versus Denny's. And so what happened was... Why don't we go around the room really quick? I like IHOP.

I like IHOP. I would have said IHOP as well. Yeah, definitely IHOP. But what happened was, like, people were just arguing always about whether you go to IHOP or Denny's. So they basically got, like, 10 of the best players in, like, the Midwest area entirely to show up and just, like, basically just have a crew battle, which is a specific set of rules, and whichever team won, that would be the de facto after Smash Tournament,

you go to this place. And I'm pretty sure IHOP won. I haven't thought about this match in a while, but I'm pretty sure IHOP won. I haven't thought about this match in a while, but I'm pretty sure IHOP won. They even got, like, custom character skins for the characters they played for IHOP versus Denny's. Did it get heated? Like potato skins? Skins for your character.

Oh, skins. Yeah. They always had one person from IHOP or Denny's on the mic, like, commentating. So there was... And, like, you could hear people popping off in the background they had people from IHOP or Denny's like a waitress on that team on that team yeah I thought you meant like the hostess I don't fucking know what's

going on yeah like theater kids do the same thing though they always go to Denny's after the theater kids are just freaks I was gonna say Art you're not no no, no. But was there an overlap?

I mean, yeah. I was a band geek, so it's basically the same depressed high schooler kind of thing. Oh. So we got... What instrument did you play? I played trumpet and uh tuba cool i love that that's cool oh he's a super interesting guy yes he has so much shit that i didn't know and he also loves sipping on high news um if you ever wanted i could play the piano for you while you sang for us

yeah you want to do something you want to learn errol koenig that was the last one i was working on i'm not familiar this christian german well no not religious at all no this one's just i if i remember the story correctly it's about a father and a son riding a horse and the son's like hey there's a demon that's gonna get me the son the dad's like, no, there isn't. And then the kid gets taken. But in the song. In the song, yeah.

If real life. Having a piano accompaniment is a prerequisite to you performing or showing your beautiful voice to the yak world, I would happily learn the piece for you. We can work it out. Yeah. I'm very keen to hear you sing. I chose one of the hardest piano pieces ever written.

Maybe I don't have that in me. We'll check it out, though. But you can do acapella. Nothing sounds good acapella. Oh, disagree. Michael Lowry's group on YouTube. They're excellent. Clearly, you've never heard I Just Had Sex acapella.

Yeah, my God. What the first 40 bars of I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston. There was no music behind that. Yeah, I'm not Whitney Houston. Kent State doing it. What were they called? What was the Kent State singer? I forget.

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I was sipping on the mangoes all weekend. Two? All weekend. Peach has, I think, actually become my new favorite. I think it's over taking watermelon. I like the peach. I like the mango. But you guys can get it at

Drizzly or your local convenience store or liquor store or you can visit highnoonspirits.com and it'll find it for you. I always assumed kiwi was a lemon limey type flavor. Three different fruits. Well, lemon and lime I feel like have a lemon lime-y type flavor. It's got three different fruits. Well, lemon and lime I feel like have a similar taste. Yeah, what?

Citrusy. Yeah, citrusy. I assumed kiwi was in that family. It's just not. It's its own delicious taste. And there's golden kiwi, which is ten steps above a regular kiwi. Can I say a weird take about fruits and vegetables? Go ahead.

I think cucumbers and apples taste similar. I don't disagree with that. Okay. There's a wateriness to them both. So I think cucumber is the most subtle taste in all of cuisine. I remember in sixth grade, this girl Stephanie for snack time would bring in cucumbers and she would dip them in ranch. And I always thought, ugh, what is this? It's pretty normal.

That's pretty good, too. I would think, what a disgusting freak. And then one day I disgusting freak. That's pretty normal. That's pretty good, too. I would think, what a disgusting freak. And then one day I tried it. That's very normal. A salad item. But in sixth grade, you know, kids are bringing in,

they're bringing in fucking Cheez-Its and famous Amos cookies. I was always bringing in cucumbers and tomatoes. Yeah, same. I wonder how far cucumbers would have gotten if not for their texture.

Because they are relatively tasteless. Yeah. But the texture is satisfying. There's a crunch to it. They're very refreshing. Water chestnuts. That would be the comparison, right? What are those called? Is that what they're called? Water chestnuts?

Somebody? Water crests? Those are in Chinese food. Yeah. Those are tasteless. I'd imagine. What do those look like? I don't know if I've ever had one of those. They look like little translucent discs. There's the birthday boy. John Feidelberg. That's his birthday? I think it is.

I think it is. There's no chance he didn't see that wave. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I've had one of those. I don't know if I've ever had one of those. They are the most pointless things on Earth. They do have a good crunch, though, in that chicken dish.

The chicken Chinese dish. I don't like the crunch in some of those things. I don't like the Chinese broccoli. I don't like these whatsoever. There's a name for it don't like the broccoli. I don't like these whatsoever. There's a name for it. I can't remember. What is the actual plant called? Yeah, that's in that dish. I don't love them. No. I think that would be

the cucumber trajectory. The Asian cucumber. I think I started or watched Sisu. Phenomenal. Oh, I heard that's good. I'm excited to see that. I've been trying to put people on. Phenomenal. Oh, I heard that's good. I'm excited to see that. I've been trying to put people on. A little bit unrealistic.

Oh, I love it. What is it? John Wick as an old man versus Nazis or something? Yeah, it's this guy turning Nazis to paste. Amazing. Did you see that fucking, someone made like a simulation of what those people that died in the submarine, like what it would have looked like. Yes.

Yeah. It wasn't explode. It was, they were turned to dust. Oh, that's yeah. They are. We've probably inhaled some of that.

Yeah. Yeah. A hundred percent. We probably drank part of them. Yeah. Hmm. Yeah. That was nuts.

Play that. I got to pee though. Best of luck. Should we also didn't mean to be bossy there Should we play that I guess we should It's interesting This is a

Right off the bat Is this like a microscopic Oh Person See that would hurt I don't I think it would happen so fast You wouldn't feel it

So is the idea That would be very painful For a little bit I don't think That would be like the most painful sensation I don't feel it. So is the idea of your... That would be very painful for a little bit. That would be like the most painful sensation. I don't think it would be painful. I'll be it for a little bit. I think it would hurt. I think it's fair to say that would hurt.

I think you would go into the gates like, ah, fuck. I don't think your body... That still hurts. I don't think your body would have time to feel pain. Imagine putting your hand in fire and how bad that hurts. Imagine that on your whole body, plus your organs exploding.

Eater has given you an ice pack at those. I genuinely don't think that there would be time to feel pain. That's how Dr. Manhattan kills people. Oh, yeah. From Watchmen. Now, did they decide, like, was there – I know there was the fear that they had an impending doom where it was like we're about to die.

Do we know if that was still the case or did this just happen out of nowhere? That's the real takeaway. If they knew they were going to die for hours that's a horrible if that just happened out of nowhere that would be fine better than i would say fine but better than like having a shitty rest of your life yeah i mean they've seemed pretty well off yeah shame is that from the sprite commercial have you ever seen that they have like someone took a picture of that

like that fake drake sculpture like outside of the commercial and it looks insane that's a real like it's a standing sculpture somewhere yeah i don't know if there's a real, like it's a standing sculpture somewhere. Yeah, there is. I don't know. There's a picture of it somewhere. Did you guys read the story about the kid on the Upper East Side who was terrorizing the hotel, the very high-end hotel, the Mark Hotel? Yeah, that's what it looks like.

Drake was trying to come into that hotel and he was screaming at Drake, this place denies the Holocaust. The kid was terrorizingized like bombing it no he um john rich blogged it about a week and a half ago but it was written up in the new york times a couple days ago and that was my first exposure to it he a while back he tried to get a drink at the hotel bar when he was 17 years old and used a fake id and they were like this is a fake id you can't drink here and he took it so personally that he started uh picketing the hotel and being he would walk

around outside of it and tell guests and other people that they were anti-semitic that they deny the holocaust um and all kinds of other stuff was he in a hat was he was he jewish he's jewish yeah okay so it probably worked a little bit um and he and he would just walk around outside saying stuff and then like drake came to the hotel to stay there. And he... Look at that. That was him? Oh. He's so cute. I think I'm on his side. This is awesome. He told Drake... He started screaming at Drake,

don't, like, you know... There's the video of Drake. Oh. Yeah. I don't get what his gripe is. Because he couldn't drink there. At 17. At 17.

Wannabe booze hound. Is this sausage on his blue bag? He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up.

He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up.

He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up.

He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up.

He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up.

He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. He's a one-up. what's this what's he chanting it's mark that's the guy saying that mark what he sounded old as hell mark does something i don't know what he's saying but that was him. And now Mark had to put a restraining order against him. Yeah, well-deserved. I think it was Mark loves Epstein. Yes, that's right. Never mind.

That's a good move. They housed Jeffrey Epstein. Apparently Jeffrey Epstein's home was like three blocks away, so he was drunk. That's hilarious. Why? This kid is only 17 when when he got rejected how long ago was that his arms folded he might be older than me oh yeah that's his pose smug i'll be wild if he got rejected years ago still eating it looks like he's 18 now i think so and what i mean it's story. When he's interviewed, what does he say?

It's an unbelievably funny story. He has no points, son. There's nothing for him. Are there any videos of him talking? There's got to be. I mean, he's got those headshots. I read this. I instantly thought of Kyle and Nick. I just...

You guys did shit like that. Appreciate it. You were 17. You guys love that shit. I mean, it is. That's phenomenal. The wannabe booze hound. Can I back him?

Hold on. Do you have a page? He's got to have a GoFundMe, I would bet. You guys, have you seen the videos of the kids on the bikes terrorizing people? They'll drive it. They'll wheelie it. They'll wheelie right at your car. Right at you and then swerve at the last possible second.

Sometimes they're hitting people. Yeah, we watched that on the act, didn't we? Yeah. They're getting even worse. They are actually hitting people. Oh, that's crazy. I've almost gotten freaking hit by one of those guys, one of those punks.

Were you in a car? No, walking. Oh, my God. They're always out on the street. Getting hit by a bike would hurt so bad. Dude, I was thinking about that when I first moved here. If I got hit by one of those Uber Eats dudes, I think you just have to brawl as soon as you get up. You're getting pulverized and you're getting punctured.

There's the feeling of the rubber, the spokes. It's so much more embarrassing than getting hit by a car. Oh, yeah. It's got to hurt more. Yeah. It's like a sharp hit. It's their sharp hit. It would be like being a ghost ship with everybody in half. What do you think you do after that when you both get up? I think it just has to like a sharp hit. It's their sharp hit. Yeah, it would be like there being a ghost ship. Yeah.

Everybody in half. What do you think you do after that when you both get up? I think it just has to be a brawl, like a fight to the death. Nobody's taking blame for that. Yeah. Probably sit there and wither in pain. Yeah. I think I'd cry.

I think the adrenaline would be too much. I would definitely cry. I would for sure be crying. I think you would cry moments later. I think your adrenaline would be like through the roof. I'd be mad. You would have to brawl. You would have to brawl.

You and the Uber Eats guy. Let's do a test experiment where Liz has a run with an Uber Eats biker. It's a matter of time. Oh, this guy's steezy as fuck. This is so far so good. I wish they would just stick to this. Oh. as fuck. This is so far so good. I wish they would just stick to this. That's so far cool. There's a couple guys that ride

with no front wheel, so they're just perma-wheelied. They're not doing what I was thinking. I know what you're talking about when they go right up. Oh, right. This guy is good though but this guy should be in jail right that should be very illegal yeah and a lot of these guys don't have chains on their bike either i don't think i think they just mx bikes have

chains right i think they take them off i think Adam 22 was into this before he got into like pussy and stuff. Yeah, he was a big BMX guy. That's like his whole podcast. From Nashua. Yeah. He's like crazy. And he was friends with that dude. Was his name Brandon or something like that?

He did like that massive stair jump and he smacked his head. Dead? Now he lived, but now he's all scrambled eggs in the brains. What was that guy's name? I mean, that's just a cool bike, and I would just rather have the front wheel on it. Yeah, it would just be more fun. What the fuck was this guy's name? Man. what the fuck was this guys man have you seen Bam Margera like criticizing

uh Steve-O's kickflip no they're beefing big time he has a rap he has a diss track towards like Steve-O and props to him he's been at like the furthest depths of rock bottom for a long time he keeps going lower.

He's sustained that depth for like 12 years. He has to have the longest rock bottom. And he's getting worse. You know, people always say rock bottom. I'll tell you what, man. You can always go lower. Yeah. You were ever in Margera's.

I'm not saying I could draw a way for Bam Margera to go lower than he is right now. I don't. Wow, what's going on with him? Dude, if Bam Margera, if tomorrow came out that he was being accused of like horrific sex crimes, we'd be like, wow. Right, that's worse. We didn't know it had got. I feel like rock bottom implies

like you did you don't have any moral corruption like that oh isn't he like he's like smoking crack and shit right yeah yeah there's still i i guarantee you that there are still a lot of people who are like in spite of what bam bam margera has done and how far he's fallen from grace i'm still a fan of him and there are things he could do that would even lose him those fans yeah like I'm a depraved axe that doesn't really count no I guess it does but you could be at rock bottom without those acts though

right well that's the issue that's why I'm saying that rock bottom is relative. Okay. Two things. You were there too. I'm surprised. Oh, no. I'm there too, Francis. It's not about me at all.

Francis was there too. Not me at all. Next to Margera and Crosby. We all have in our life a rock bottom moment. We could all look back in our lives, respectively, and look at a moment where we were like, that was the lowest point in my life. Everybody has their own personal rock bottom. Yeah, but if we went out tomorrow and just, I don't know,

did something, the worst thing you could imagine. Right, but that, I mean, of course. I don't know, like drive a car into a kindergarten and kill a whole bunch of kids. Applying that that doesn't happen. Let's say that happened. We'd be like, boy, I really wish I had that old rock bottom back. Yeah.

I thought it was bad then. You can't. This is worse. Good question to ask someone to learn about their psyche. Like, what's the worst possible thing that could happen tomorrow? Francis is driving a car into a kindergarten. No, I know. Not to be like, not to sound like a fucking psychopath but if

you're gonna do that and you're planning on doing that it's probably not rock bottom that's probably not rock top tier right barring doing a heinous thing is an accident yeah do you why you drive into

a yeah it's rock bottom yeah that's rock bottom yeah that's that you meant like a purpose barring a horrible tragedy Bam Margera's discrepancy from now at rock bottom to at his peak is the is the farthest margin of anyone that I can think of right now.

But here's the question. Is he at rock bottom? I guess not. Do you think he can go lower? No, no, no. Serial rape of town. Has he come up from his rock bottom a year ago? He's not.

Because he's still having, he's going to Vegas, he's still having fun, I guess. So he's not at rock bottom. I think he's, when he gets cirrhosis, he will be at rock bottom. Can someone break this down? Because I don't know what happened.

I'm so lost. He got kicked off of it. Margera's beefing with the other jackass guys. He got kicked off of the last jackass while he was shooting it because he broke his sober contract. Right.

He had to stay sober to stay on the shoot. He didn't, so they kicked him off of the movie. And now he's like rapping. Since then, been like if you're rapping is rapping might be worse the lowest wrapping his rock bottom like steve-o who's doing like really well compared to where his rock bottom was has been like chirping him back with like kind of like funny like skateboard video promos because he sells skateboards or whatever and then bam is like this guy can't even skate.

Bam Margera, he used to be like one of the best skaters in the world. Yeah. Who physically cannot ride a skateboard anymore because he's so fun. He blames Jackass for hurting him, for making him do a stunt he didn't want to do. And it ruined his ability to skateboard. Something along those lines. It's really just the drug abuse and neglect to his own. Well, I saw him just like he got out of rehab and he was like, yep, off to Vegas. So he's not even attempting recovery. Kind of sick just like he got out of rehab and he was like, yep, off to Vegas. So he's not even attempting

recovery. Kind of sick. He was so excited. I never experienced it. One way to celebrate being out of rehab. Vegas, baby. He's not at rock bottom because he reached a level of excitement that I have never felt in years. That was probably

the best day of his life Yeah he was so happy Yeah he's I guess fine Is he smoking crack? I feel like I saw that he was smoking crack Why wouldn't he? Yeah He's lost the plot And aren't people tweeting at him

Like going to rescue him and shit They're trying but that's like weirder isn't like one of his buddies like he keeps on like doing like updates about him I feel like I keep seeing that on Twitter but I don't really pay attention to it I just scroll by it

I'm trying to think who is at his level of falling Epstein? besides doing a depraved act non-criminal yeah besides a non-criminal act fall off

what about that dude from Friends he's had a rough go. Matthew Chandler? He's kind of back a little bit. His name's not actually Chandler. Johnny Football. Johnny Manziel had a rough go. Somewhat comparable.

His peak was... He's also so young that I feel like that doesn't really count. Because he's got plenty of time. And he's back already. He's only 30. Yeah. Did anyone watch that documentary? Yeah, yeah. It's nuts. It was fucking great. I wish it had been time. I mean, he's back already. He's only 30. Yeah. Did anyone watch that documentary? Yeah, yeah.

It's nuts. It was fucking great. I wish it had been longer. I really wanted... They, like, casually at the end were like, oh, yeah, he almost killed himself and then just ended with him, like, drinking a beer. It was like they breezed over the part where he's like, I had a gun. Yeah.

I tried to kill myself. And then also he beat the shit out of his girlfriend. They just, they cringed right by that part. And then they had one night where he kind of got in a shit out of his girlfriend they just they cringe right by that part and then the one night where he kind of got in a little bit of a scuffle with his girlfriend and then i get mad sometimes yeah off to vegas and it just showed him and then it just showed him trailing off he was like yeah and then it's like wait what hold on a minute my girlfriend tried to get out of the car, beat the fuck out of her. Wombo combo.

Yeah, and then it like changed. They all went to fucking IHOP. Yeah. Did it make you empathize with him anymore? It made him fucking. Not really. I almost bought a Johnny football jersey. Honestly, yeah.

It reminded me of how fucking massive he was. It's almost like the fact that he was a freshman in college, partying with Drake and all that, flying out to Vegas. I think I almost forgot how crazy the Heisman Trophy was. Thinking about a freshman now that we're older, like an 18-year-old. Yeah, it's crazy.

I think anyone that was in his position would have gone insane. It was also funny seeing the nominations for the Heisman Trophy, and two out of three of them have untold documentaries on netflix yeah yeah yeah great point yeah yeah i did feel very bad for um for that for what's the friend no no no yeah when i watched that one i felt very bad that's what i heard yeah yeah i never watched that one he didn't very bad. That's what I heard. I never watched that one. He didn't do anything bad, right? Well, you just realized that he just fundamentally did not know. He was just so dumb. And then everyone started being like, he's gay.

He's so stupid. Yeah. When it all was like... Is the takeaway he's gay or dumb? Stupid. Well, I guess that's a synonym at this point. He's just stupid. He's gullible.

He's like sweet. Okay. Shit. I was being homophobic toward him. He's like a sweet, gullible guy. I feel bad now. I'm sorry for that energy. Oh, I was bullying you because you were gay.

You're just stupid. I'm sorry, man. Clear that up. I'm sorry. I thought you were gay. Yeah, fuck. A lot of misplaced hate. You're just an idiot.

Fucking idiot. You can't choose to be an idiot. I thought you were just sucking dick because you were dumb. It's not a sin to be stupid. Oh, he's so dumb he's sucking dick. Yeah. Alright, I gotta hit a streak. Now I feel good. Alright, yeah.

One, two, three, man. All right, I got to hit a streak. Now I feel good. All right, yeah, yeah, yeah. One, two, three, four. Ivy saved it. Six, seven. Seven? Solid. All right, Nick's ready to just upstage you. The proper record holder. The pride of West Virginia.

I relapsed on weed this weekend. Really? I was in Tahoe. I looked too beautiful. I said... This is unbelievable. Oh, wow. 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17.

That was good. See how much more controlled he is? Yeah, I think it's a... I think you're hitting yours too hard. I know, I'm getting too excited. I gotta relax. I think you need to do more controlled, Kyle. I don't know.

Hockey sack's fun. So fun. What else are you guys into? Anything new you're into, Tommy? Anything new. Oh, Cincinnati. Cincinnati was cool. I liked Cincinnati.

I went in very low expectations. Yeah, you should. They were met a little bit. They exceeded it a little bit. Like, they exceeded it a little bit. I would say Skyline Chili actually kind of good. You had it?

I've had it. It was better than I expected it to be. Yeah, it's... You can imagine the taste. It's not like repulsive. No, the taste I imagined was way worse than

the taste that I felt that it was, yeah. I went to the Barstool Bar on Saturday night. Woo! Yeah, do you guys... Have you guys been to the Philly one? No I've heard it's amazing

I've heard it's amazing Is there any sort of special treatment For being a long time barstool guy? No What did you do? I didn't get any I had to be like I know Shane I'm friends with Shane

And that's how they let me in We don't get any perks You had to be like, I know Shane. I'm friends with Shane. And then that's how they let me in. We don't get any perks for going to our namesake bar? You gotta let them know ahead of time. Yeah, maybe that'll do it. Mook got more special privilege than I did. Mook is like a made man in Philly. It's very uncomfortable.

He took me, Friday morning, he took me to all these stores on South Street, I think it was called. And I guess he used to do all of their taxes. Wow, I guess he was bigger. That does sound mafia-ish. Yeah, he used to do all their taxes. We went to like four different places.

And they come up and they're like, you're a friend of Mook, you're a friend of mine. And then they're like, dude's looking me dead in the eyes and be like, if you need anything, call me. What kind of stores? Call me. If, if you need anything, call me. What kind of stores? Call me. If you need a draft, you call me. I'll get you anything you need. Are we talking like shoe stores?

We went to a shoe store. They were all cool stores. We went to a vintage wrestling store, which was awesome. The dude that worked there was really cool. Was Mook powerful? I think, in Philly. All we do is shit on him. I think he could have any of us killed instantly. You're saying that stems from his accountant days.

That's not comedian Barstool or anything. I think it's the accounting days, him being a stand-up, and then him getting success at Barstool. I think it's a combination of all of them. Philly's proudest son? It was a warm moment. He used to hide that he did stand-up from his parents. Yes.

He used to not tell his parents where he was going on the weekends. Oh, I'm going out to Texas to visit a friend. He never told them. Yeah, and then he made up a name, Mook, which isn't his name by any means. And he finally told his parents, and they went to his show for the first time. Yeah, on Saturday? His dad.

His dad brought the strap. His dad brought a gun. Yeah, his dad brought a gun. He accidentally brought a gun. Yeah accidentally brought a gun. He was just strapped up. Which is funny because we were with Billy McCusker, who's Matt McCusker's brother, and his dad brought a gun to Philly Helium as well. I think Philly fathers are just airing guns.

They're so afraid. Apparently their whole mindset is like, I'm going into the city. I'm not going to bring my gun. That's crazy. Like, I have to bring my gun. I guess if I had a gun. Did they bring, like, Uzis out? They just bring a pistol. In case 27th graders, like, storm Wawa.

Mook's dad had, like, the banana clip in it. Yeah. It was crazy. And they're all wearing Mook shirts. All got Mook's face. And then these dads just got the strap. Yeah, my dad has in Boston. So his parents are men and women of God, respectively.

Yes. And they're involved with the church. I don't really know. If you Google, like, MOOC, it's just a big graphic that says, Fuck God. Yeah. In quotes. Can you try to Google MOOC Barstow?

MOOC Barstow. I think it's,'s like the first image. It's a quote card saying, fuck God. He never even said it. I asked Gooch to make the graphic.

Oh, that was you. Yeah, oopsie. His parents were very nice. Okay, so we're good. Mook's got the bootleg tease. The dude's made it. Just a bunch of boot the bootleg tees. The dude's made it. Just a bunch of bootleg tees. This is hilarious.

There was not a demand for that. Look at that one chair. There's no one. You think he has ins with Google, too. Jesus Christ. God is in there. Try Googling fuck God after Mook. Maybe that's taken down.

Mook is so powerful. Is there stuff to the right? Are we too zoomed in? Are we too zoomed in maybe? What the fuck? He got it taken down because merely a week ago was one of the first results. MOOC. It's not a bad idea.

Oh, man. We got to stop making fun of him. Dude, there's this place in Philly, Angelo's. I guess it's like the biggest Philly cheesesteak place. Look how big the graphic is. Left of center. Of course, it's a woman's woman's tea. Let me get the v-neck go with the v-neck I want the mook

v-neck how can we not see a preview are those ones sold out on the side grayed out sweatshirt in the long sleeve to your sold out what is going on, dude? Oh my god. Yeah, what the...

They got the hats? No way. Wait, no. We gotta get the mook face masks. This is so funny. How does this happen? I don't know he's been holding out i don't know what this is like there's a website that you can get a jeff d low duvet cover no way no way no way go away take my credit card oh my god dude there's this place in philly called angelo's and i guess it has like the best cheesesteak in Philly you were just saying they're famous yeah

and it uh and they like you if you you have to have like a red like you can't go you can't just go you have to have like you have to call before but apparently the line is so busy that you have to call like rapid fire like have multiple people calling just to get a cheesesteak and some dude was like you go there just call me in advance I'll get you guys set up we'll put you up in the apartment upstairs and we'll'll have a whole spread. The apartment upstairs? Because there's no indoor seating, so you guys can just go to the apartment upstairs, and we'll have a spread for you guys.

Did you do it? No. But it was just like, dude, where are you getting all these connections? Oh, it was Mook. It was just Mook. That was another Mook connection. Why did Mook ever leave the city of Philly? I don't know.

Yeah, he should stay there. It's like it's a king. It's what everyone was saying. Everyone was like, dude, why are you of Philly? I don't know. Yeah, he should stay there. It's like it's a king. It's what everyone was saying. Everyone was like, dude, why are you leaving Philly? It's Jeff D'Lo, dude. Oh, my God. What can we get these on? Phone case?

I mean, there's like a 0% chance these ever arrive. Scroll up just the images. Oh, my God. Bedsheets. There's beds. No, it was a shower curtain. It was a shower curtain. I'm buying it.

I would match my body to his. Jeff D. Lowe sheets stay on during sex. Oh, my God. You could theme your room. Wait, look at it folded down. No head. Drawstring. You think we could buy the one and barter it up until it gets fucked on?

Is he not bothered at all that people are fucking making money off of his likeness? I mean, I don't. These are AI generating. I don't... These are AI-generated. I don't think... No, this was drawn by somebody. Wait, click on that artist. Tommy might have

some stuff on here. Wait, click on that artist's page because I think... Barstool? Yeah. Oh, this is real. Yeah.

Oh, if there's anything of me, I'm done. Oh, there I am. Whoa, you know, that's a huge comp that she knew you'd be mad. Look at that jaw. This is cool.

The jaw looks unreal. Tommy's buying that. Holy shit. You'll unironically have that bed cover. Do they do a bed cover for him? No. It's just stickers. It's the water bottle.

Oh, that's just a sticker. Fucking bullshit. Look at that jaw, though. There's the act on Goatee Day. There's Rediscovering America taking a shit. Oh, my God. Wait, somebody sent me these these I thought they just made them That's a Dana beer. They did appear to have drawn this

Look at that Henry Is that Tommy Tommy Winks. Ew! That's not a good one, Tommy. That's a bad one. That's bizarre. Why do they make your lips lighter shade than your face? What's the mature content one? Oh, shit.

What is it? Oh, that's just me. Wait, it's me? Cutting off Kyle's head? Oh, that's just me. Wait, it's me? Oh, cutting off Kyle's head? Oh, my God. That's awesome. I didn't know it was going to be me. I thought it was Kyle.

He's got a dickhead. Oh, my God. That's really cool. I like that one. A leggy. Why is it just called Greg Sticker? That was my... That's my dad's name.

That was my name on, pardon my take, Dungeons and Dragons. Oh, I see. Reg with two Gs. Reg? No, just G-R-E-G. Yeah, two Gs. Oh, I found my new favorite website. Idiot.

Oh, damn it. Hey, Tommy, are you going to be the president of the New York office? Probably. What's up? You guys care about that or no? God damn it Hey Tommy Are you going to be The president of the New York office Probably What's up You guys care about that Or no I guess Are we not getting

The same emails as you Now that we're sitting in Chicago Sorry Segregation That's happening already You guys cast the first stone That was the shot heard

Around the world Which one Different emails I guess Roan's taking on A pretty big leadership role As well Yeah Yeah

He's in charge of this like YouTube video kind of series Okay Yeah Thank you I'm glad you clarified it was a YouTube video Yeah, YouTube series You can always go into the community section and just write a little post That's where our blogs are going up now

Fucking A So yeah, you're running for president But there is one adversary Who? That's where our blogs are going up now. Fucking A. So yeah, you're running for president, but there is one adversary. Who? Meek Phil. Oh my god, such a disgusting freak. He's beloved amongst our people. I know. Look, it's...

The New York office is a lot of it. The floor likes you. Everybody else fucking loathes you. Meek Phil is beloved on every floor. Yeah, Meek Phil... Well, I feel like Meek Phil's... Like, everybody within this building despises him. likes you everybody else fucking loathes you meek phil is beloved on every floor yeah meek phil well i feel like meek phil's like everybody within this building despises him but he's beloved by the outside world that true i'm just i'm just riffing i don't actually hate meek phil i just

like to tell him that i hate him the new york office is more of a family oh yeah yeah we're we don't put each other down we only build each other up all right constantly collaborating you guys do a blood pack yet in chicago yeah we did a blood pack last week you guys had i don't know if you guys saw our five years to do that i bleed viva now i bleed viva i was sitting in between k marco and hubs and i said this is my fucking family at like 7 a.m these are my brothers furiously probably right when you were furiously texting kb and nick at like 7 a.m. These are my brothers. Furiously.

Probably right when you were furiously texting KB and Nick. It was wild. Francis, you were out of the office for this ordeal? On Friday. No, I was here on Friday. Oh, yes, you were here on Friday. It was Thursday. I missed Thursday. I had a bit of a sad thing happen last week that I won't get into.

I think that's for the best, yeah. Unless it was somebody else's business, then you would. Probably, yeah. Sorry about the sad thing. That's okay. We missed you in Philly. It would have been so much fun if you were there. I know, it's a good time i wish i could have but i asked hairball when i thought maybe i could get down there i thought i asked if i could come do some time on

his show and he's like dude everybody in the world has asked me if they can do time on the show did he say that yeah and he's was not i didn't say everyone in the world i said everyone a lot of people in philly were asking so comedians will hit you up like hey can i do it people i'm friends with like but it was like i already have we had right four people going up on the friday show the late show i was the fifth comic on stage yeah that's not great now it's too many people like the audience then gets restless yeah exactly that's what happened what are the rules for asking is there like overstepping or is it like what if no it's people it's like can i do a guest spot tough to say no um no you say i can't it's already there's already too many people on the show it's also unique there's not then if i'll say yes i don't

give a shit if people go up it's unique too that it was in philly in that it's such a big community of comics down there that we that are also up they come to New York and they come and if you were doing like Minneapolis I don't think you'd have

no that would never happen 10 people asking you for time on that show but they all came and hung out it was fun yeah we got Rough and Rowdy

coming up is that this week? this Friday in Wheeling, West Virginia fuck yeah Kyle and I were right next to Wheeling, West Virginia. Fuck yeah. Kyle and I were right next to Wheeling, Illinois, which was crazy this past week. It was crazy.

Crazy to see that on the sign. We have way more culture. Okay. They're bigger. But Wheeling, West Virginia, we'll be hosting Rough and Rowdy 22. All your favorite personalities will be there. Big Cats, Dave, caleb robbie large um i know it should be a good show and i think we're going to try to get incorporated here on the yak uh where we're going to have a match that will be the yak match and we'll split up the show evenly and there will be a punishment

whoever loses yep act of punishments i'm not sure how we're going to divvy that up, but I think they're doing five rounds for the first time. Wow. Oh, really? Yeah. Just the main card? Some of them. Oh, that's awesome. The last few fights are five rounds for the first time. Yeah, it would be horrible for the out-of-shape lards.

Right. This one's going to be good, too, because there's a lot of people that are 0 and 0. That is the mystique. Who's some of the heavy hitters at this one? Bobby Lang's back. Is he coming off an L? Diamond Hands.

Who's the hockey guy? We can go through if you want. I think that we should pick one of the fights to be the Yak fight. Can we have the chat pick the punishment? We'll have the right to say no, but my brain's not working right now. Also, this can be purchased on YouTube pay-per-view now, right? First time YouTube pay-per-view, so there'll be a chat if you want to buy it that way,

and then you can get in the chat. Maybe I'll drop it in the chat. That's really cool. I like that. We filmed another game night. We sure did. How was it? I think it's going to be our best one.

Do tell. I mean, it has one to beat. The best of the two. The other one's still podiums, but it was funny. It was very fun. It's such a blast playing board games. We're going to keep it moving. Kyle was very funny. What are you guys aiming to do? How many times? How often? We're going to keep it moving. Kyle was very funny.

What are you guys aiming to do? How many times? How often? We're going to try to bank some. We're keeping it alive. We had some meetings. As many as they want us to do. Tickets bought.

I have no problem taking a flight. We're prepping to fly back to New York like 20 times. We could fly to you guys, do a couple there, and then you can fly to us and do a couple here, and then all of a sudden. Sounds like me and Roan have to go anyways, first week of September. Stop saying have to go. I think we get to go. What are you guys doing?

Chicago. We're going to try to record some stuff with you and Roan as well. Wait, what are you guys doing? We have to do the yak we have to there's like you guys are gonna keep the yak going like uh with the original crew beyond through the whole thing i don't really know you guys will be on a lot and i think there's gonna be a lot of back and forth um but yeah we'll see wow fun that's great news for instance you've been a big role player on this program if i come in and i i that's not true at all.

I just light shit on fire. That's not true at all. And that's a good thing. Fucking... When you are on that mode... Lob grenades. I love that, and I love that. Lob grenades in here.

I'm sure you're not... You'd be okay with making some trips? Yeah, I'm not... Look, I want to come to Chicago. I just want to see what you guys are up to. I'm excited to see what it's like out there. Why do I feel like this is going to turn into a bloodthirsty rivalry? It won't.

You guys are going to turn and lead us from the group chat? No. And I don't think the office... We've already got a new group chat. It doesn't depend on the office that you're in. If people are doing that, we're all still going to be friends. I'm all about me. I mean, it's podcasting at the end of it.

Sure is. Yeah, it is. Are we going to do violent podcasting? Angry? Well, to be good at podcasting, you have to get to the office at 7 in the morning. That's when the best podcasting happens. Right and early. I would like for there to be some kind of a fun thing,

whether it's like the Chicago versus Nework softball game or like dodgeball or i don't know something like that we could make it a olympic games or some bullshit thing i want to have a custody battle for clemmer who's not moving out there that i thought was moving out there. Clemmer. Cyrus. Cyrus. Yo, do we have to jump to let Barstool Radio go? Yeah, we should. I don't want to...

Yeah, just free over. All right, next week we got a bunch of shit. We got Monday. We have a jam-packed week. Filming the case race going to Stu's on Tuesday. Nice.

Yeah, yeah. I'm not going to be here tomorrow. Yeah, Mr. Hitchings, Tim will be doing the root beer challenge in the office. I'm not going to be here tomorrow Mr. Hitchings, Tim will be doing the root beer challenge in the office I'm out tomorrow I gotta go to Long Island to do this golf thing that'll be fun bummer

we also off camera should talk about what world record we're attempting to break that too, we gotta do that sales needs to know alright, thank you guys for watching the Yak Barstool Radio. Oh, we need to do the wheel. Spin the wheel and then flip on over to

Barstool Radio. Spin the wheel round and round we go. Not bad. Not bad at all. Without piano. No, that wasn't my best. Dude, you're too chaotic. You're too angry. Hacky sacking is a calm thing.

It's a calm thing. Thank you guys for watching the Yak. Same time tomorrow, same place. Probably same faces besides us. So Francis. Rome will be here tomorrow. Cool. Cool. We'll see you next time. It's the act Yeah it's time to talk shop

We're doing Yankees love It's the act It's the act