The Yak - New Oregon Trail Day Turns into a Total Disaster | The Yak 12-15-22

Episode Date: December 15, 2022

It was never the new Oregon TrailYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. The Yak. This is, um... it's Oregon Trail Day. It's Oregon Trail Day. Yeah. Uh. I don't know how we're going to do it with no Big Cat, no Jerry, no.

No Roan. No Sass, no Kyle. No Kyle. This is, uh, but this is, if I were going to the Oregon Trail, the actual, this is the three I would pick. Oh. You'd be dead within seconds the three I would pick. Oh. You'd be dead within seconds. Whoa.

Big cat. Whoa. I don't know. Where's the other half of the show? We don't know. KB's at the neurologist. Neurologist. Neurologist.

Harry. Harry is right there, I believe. The hunter himself. Sass out. I don't know where Roan is. Where the fuck has Roan been? Jerry, that's a long ass t-shirt. Is Roan in LA?

Yeah. Oh, he is? Long ass t-shirt. He said he'll be in by tomorrow, right? Gotta be here for the Oh, that's right. Yeah, yeah, he's coming back. Before we get into anything, I gotta do a birthday shout out to a big yak guy, Colin Watson. Colin! You may remember him

as the African-American boy that said KB's dancing was valid. Oh. All-time yak guy. 21st, he said he's going to buy a bottle of Henny. Wow. Valid. Happy birthday.

Ever since he said KB's dancing was valid, it's proved KB's life a lot. You can see KB had a new confidence after that. It was unbelievable. Valid is a great word to use. If you're dancing and Colin Watson comes up to you and says that dancing's valid. You're made for life. Yeah.

Valid. I'm just tweeting out the link. How was pick central, Brandon? Can I talk to you, me and you, just man to man real quick? Yeah. I don't know if that guy's going to change. No, I don't think he is either. That guy, he's still.

Is he moping? The anger's still there. Is he moping? Wasn't moping. He was not moping, and he was putting on a good face, but I still see the anger in his eyes. I don't know that that guy's going to change. Yeah, Rico's back.

People think it's a bit. I understand why you'd think it's a bit. I'm not going to tell anyone they're stupid for thinking that, but it's a bit. If I was from tell anyone they're stupid for thinking that but it's certainly in a bit if i was from the outside looking in i think i would too you know hank said it himself he's like i've i'm in it and i still like i'm like is this real it looks like a bit my friends have texted me that like consumed barstool and they were just like wow you even lied to us yeah no it's uh i yeah there's nothing more i can do than just say it is 100% real. He left, he was gone, and then he came crawling back.

We have a Zero Block 30 coming out soon where Kahn tells his side of everything and Chaps kind of goes off big time. Good. I mean, I explained to Rico, and I did accidentally, Kate, speak for you. I stopped myself on Pickham, but I was like, the thing he doesn't understand is that when he's really mean to one person, that person also has friends.

We have our little squads. Right. So it's like, it's like if you're mean to one person, it's not like that's a singular entity that then that person's friends are going to be like, oh, that's cool. I have no problem with him.

They also have problems with it. Like I've never, ever had a problem with Rico. I like Rico. are going to be like, oh, that's cool. I have no problem with him. They also have problems with him. Now, like, I've never, ever had a problem with Rico. I like Rico. And now it's like, well, fuck. Now you did that. And that just sucks. Oh, wow. Chaps.

He went in. Chaps, like, really was, like, shaking by then. He was, like, really pissed. So that's coming out soon. All fair. All fair. I hate who you are as a man. Yeah.

Fair. He thinks Rico called cons to you are as a man. Yeah. Fair. He thinks Rico called cons to apologize just to get his job back. Oh, that's definitely true. And yeah. And so he just, yeah. Cons is a better man than me. A much better man than me. Zero block 30.

Check it out. They tell their whole. He would have lost two employees if he did it to me. Yeah. So he's back. Murder, suicide? No. Ultimately, it was Dave's's call and dave you know

i don't know man i i think it's i don't know it's a mistake i don't know that it's a mistake can i really just say some things yeah yeah say whatever you want i feel like we got other people who have left the company who could come back right now and haven't been allowed to and yeah i mean it was two days he got to sneak back in he but he did some really fucked up shit yeah really fucked up shit and there's not another human being if they weren't tied to you or dave in this office that would be allowed to do it all fair points i don't listen i was 50 50 i was like if i like, if he comes back, fine. If he doesn't, fine. I was totally fine with that.

I wasn't advocating for him, but it's Dave's call. So Dave's the boss. Yeah. It's Dave's company, so I have a job. I show up to work, and I don't make the decision, so I can't worry about it. It sounds like pick central didn't go so well. It went well. I thought it went well.

Was he remorseful? He put on the right face. Yeah. Jerry, what do you think? I got nothing. You got to have something. Nothing. Nothing?

No, not really. I just try not to get caught up. Yeah. You're smart. I just try to do what I can for the company and try to. Keep your head down. Yeah. Work hard.

Yeah. But I mean, he was, he was at, I mean, I just told him at the desk. He was, he's, he's mad at me last night. He's like, do you think I'm a really bad person? I was like, I think, I think you're just stupid. Yeah. And he, he didn't answer me. And then he's like, thanks for last night. And I'm like, oh, so he's moping again. No, he's not. I'm going to ask you a question. I'm going to just stupid. Yeah. And he didn't answer me, and then he's like, thanks for last night.

I'm like. Oh, so he's moping again. No, he's not. I'm going to ask you a question. I'm going to ask you a question. All right. He is a very dumb person. That making the burner and going after somebody's wife, man, that's a bridge too far.

And all he had to do was. Well, cons could have said no. Was not be here for a couple of. Cons was not in a great position to say no. How could cons really say no? No one would have even known. But it's your and Dave's guy. Oh,

I know, but no one would run the company. but cons, if cons said no, it would never have been, you know what I mean? It wouldn't have, it wouldn't have come out that he wanted to come back.

It would have just, he was gone. All right. So it wasn't like a pressure, like a public pressure thing. And you guys made that clear to cons. Yeah. As he says on Sierra blog 30,

like subscribe, you'll have to hear the whole tea. If had said no it would have literally just been like sorry rico you're not coming back and we would have never because remember we didn't talk about it until last night just all transpired over the weekend i think that rico has charisma and he's clever and he's a great on-camera person he's an incredible on-camera personality got incredible talent but god damn that shit that dunk in his his head, man, gets in the way. Oh, it's bad. It's bad. And three days away from here and immediately being left,

how's that going to fix it? I don't understand that. Oh, it probably won't. Dave was pretty clear about that. He's like, nothing's going to change. So, I mean, I'm not arguing with you. You know what I mean? I know you're not. We're just talking.

Yeah, your points are all valid. I'm not, anyone who's like, I don't like him, I don't want to be around him, like, that's totally valid. And I said this to you yesterday. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally valid. I just think it'll, some employees, it'll come back to haunt you and Dave. You think?

Like, hey, you let this guy get away with this fucking shit. Yeah. Like, shit like that. That's a fair point. I'm going to move his desk. Yeah? I don't want him, I don't want him. Where are you sending him? Probably where Mincy was Like shit like that. That's a fair point. I'm going to move his desk. Yeah? I don't want him. Probably where Mincy was.

Francis took that. Oh, he did? Yeah. Alright, we'll find another one. We can just fire Francis again. That's fine. Yeah, the vibes, you know. That's a good one. For vibes, I don't think. It's too quick. I can't. He's just. No, I was being dead serious.

So smart. We have a Game of Thrones political system in the office. And it's like a Rube Goldberg machine. If you piss off one person, you don't know where... Yeah, that's true. You've been making good noises lately. Yeah, I've been... That guy from

Spaceballs, I want to be him. Yeah. The guy from Police Academy? Yeah, the same guy. Yeah, I don't know. See? I don't want anybody to ever be out of a job, but... Just put him at a desk and just in the middle of the floor. The other part for me is everyone in this room will be in Chicago in six months.

Yeah. Yeah, I think so, Jerry. I don't think so. I think so, Jerry. I don't know. Yeah, Jerry, I think so. I don't know about that. Yeah, I think so, Jerry. I don't think so. I think so, Jerry. I don't know. Yeah, Jerry, I think so. I don't know about that. Yeah, I think so.

I know we're going to be in Oregon by the end of this episode. That's true. That's true. Well, maybe not. Maybe not. Probably not, actually. Probably not. All right, should we get into it?

Well, do you know that Stephen Chay fucked up the steak thing? We were supposed to have Lomo Saltado. Yeah, he didn't tell him. I don't think we have any steaks left. I actually was confused myself, so I don't know if that was... I asked after the show yesterday, and we were not going to do that today. Oh. I can't remember what we decided on, so I'm going to say that that's not a huge fuck-up

because I can't remember. Come on. I don't remember. I didn't remember which one we decided. Did you say that he fucked up? Listen, Stephen fucks up a lot that I pounce on. This one I can't... Thank you. Yeah. which one we fucked up just listen steven fucks up a lot that i i pounce on this one i can't thank you yeah now you fucked up i can't do this thank you thank you what are you doing you fucked up i absolutely did not fuck up we have we have uh baldy in the uh on

pmt tomorrow brian baldinger and i was like steven we have brian baldinger on steven's learning a little bit because he was like i was like what should i ask him and he was like Stephen we have Brian Baldinger on Stephen's learning a little bit because he was like what should I ask him and he's like he probably won't remember me but I did meet him at a craps table in 2013 so he did qualify it with he probably won't remember I was like good job

Stephen to have the self awareness that he definitely doesn't remember this we talked for a couple minutes he was very hospitable and he does remember I Ernest said he definitely doesn't remember this. We talked for a couple minutes. He was very hospitable. And he does remember. I would doubt it. I mean, it's like almost 10 years ago, basically.

What if he was like, that guy, he's got something. What if you stared at your wife's pussy? Oh. Easy. Easy. All right, should we start? Does everybody have their Christmas gifts for tomorrow? I do. I'm making mine tonight

no I'm in panic mode I know and I love that shit yeah it was perfect that you got homemade it was perfect and then I've been out speaking of Oregon Trail my intestines have been leaving one all over the place bad news

diarrhea yeah real bad TMI. Bad news. Diarrhea. Yeah. Real bad. Anyway, hopefully I can run out tonight and get something to make. I'll figure it out. I don't know. You make money and you could spend the money. Yeah, exactly.

It's an open-ended kind of thing. I got a gift and I think it will work well with anybody. What was your price limit again? $300. I'm excited to see. I want to know what Sass got because his was the $500 one, right? Yeah, $500. Yeah.

I'm at $60. Do we think everybody's going to be here tomorrow? Believe so. I don't think so. Better be. So we got to drop off to be here tomorrow? Believe so. I don't think so. It better be. So we got to drop off the gifts to Spider by noon tomorrow. And we're going to do the exchange in the show after that we're taping for next week. Not the 1 o'clock show.

Okay, perfect. Have him to noon and then he will wrap and do everything. Good. Got it. Should we hit the trail? Have you guys played this version yet? Oh, no. Oh, no.

I'm excited. Okay. We need to give Chef Donnie like a five-minute heads up on when we're going to be eating, so I don't know when we're going to start shooting. Oh, when we start shooting. Okay. Well, we should have some food for the first part of the trail. Then we got to start hunting.

Yeah. I don't think so. We're going to buy food right out of the- Yeah, but we got to- Not buying meat. It's wherever we hit. Yeah, it ought to be hunting. Yeah, we're buying like granola bars.

Granola bars. We might hunt like out of the parking lot then. Okay. Yeah. All right. So Oregon Trail sponsored by Omaha Steaks. Omaha Steaks has put together a delicious selection of various gift packages to make shopping for the one you love nice and easy.

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We're going to eat them all day today. Use code YAK at checkout for an extra $40 off, 50% off site-wide. omahasteaks.com, the best. Shall we? Whoa. Check them in there. Wait till we haunt. Wait till we haunt. Wait till we haunt.

Yeah, wait till we haunt. This makes me wish I had, like, a leather jacket with some fringe on it. I always am in that state. Yeah. I wish Roan was here to do the Native American thing. Yeah. How does he get away with it? I don't know.

Yeah. I think it's maybe because it's just gameplay Well it's in a game Wait do we need to learn the ropes or we just go out? No we do not need to learn any ropes You never learn ropes Skip the prologue Get the fuck out of here

Hey guys are we just lame pussies or what? That's going to bite us in the ass later Oh we are not going to know at all what to do. No. At least I'm not the one hunting. Okay. This is going to be a lot. Hello.

Whoa. Okay. I'm not reading any of this, by the way. It is your type's light odor. Yeah. Got it. Dirty balls. any of this, by the way? It is your type's light odor. Yeah, yeah. Got it? Yep. All right.

Dirty balls. Uh, yep. So what are we doing here, TJ? I think we go to Journeys. I think Journeys. Yeah, that feels like where we're supposed to be, right? Yeah.

Why does it say, have you tried the Oregon Trail? Well, don't stop believing now. Oh, fuck off. What'd you say? So I think Journeys is like quests. Yeah. Well, wait, wouldn't quests be quests? Multiple ones?

Was there a quest? Oh events I think that's probably online stuff 10 hours What did that mean? Okay let's just click Oregon Let's just do the Oregon Trail Yeah

Yeah Okay Do we want Difficulty adventurer? Yeah that's what we are That's medium right? Yeah that's fine what we are. That's medium, right? Yeah, that's fine. It's in, like, orange, so you'd think...

Fine. All right, this feels good. Yeah, objective, reach Oregon. That's easy. Oregon or bust. I'm picking bust. Yeah. Hell yeah.

Those are my choices. One ticket to bust. Give me bust. Okay. What? Wait a minute. Is this if you have friends on? Oh, no.

I got dark. Let them die. Let them die. What the fuck? Yeah. Neurologist didn't go too well. Scrapestone only says K. So that's where we got to get from.

Wait. All right, we're in Independence. Wait, there's an Oregon City that we're trying to get to first? Wait, we... It's not that small. That's like a hot... I think that's pretty content. His name's John Halfman.

All right, let's get it going. Oh, we don't pick anything this time. We just take off. Yeah, we don't get to combine our names. Okay. We only have $600. We skipped a spot. That's okay.

We definitely skipped something. May. We just lost a day. We lost a month. We lost a month. You journey across 2,000 miles of plains, rivers, and mountains. If for some reason you don't survive, your wagon burns, or thieves steal your oxen, or you run out of provisions, or you die of cholera.

What the fuck is all these ores? Don't give up. Try again and again and again. What if we... Okay. God damn it. That's it. I'll just say it right now.

The vibes could not be worse. No, this is terrible. We've started off on the wrong foot. Yeah. We're going to get to name ourselves right here. I feel it. All right. We started off on a broken foot. Okay. Oh, here we go to name ourselves right here. I feel it. We started off on a

broken foot. Oh, here we go. Wait. Hedonistic. Who should be your favorite hedonistic? I think we need the mission.

I mean, we need a we need a think something. Look at your phone real quick. Guys, we need a man to run the party. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But a missionary? Oh, I see. He's athletic. a man to run the party. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But a missionary? He's athletic. Instead of picking... An athletic missionary? Now we're just picking the... Instead of picking banker or what we did last time, now we're just picking people that represent those. Yeah.

So wait, what does he come with? One Bible? We don't want that guy. All right, you want to go banker? You want to go with this bad bitch Hannah? It's only three choices? Can you scroll? No, I bet you're going to be able to click one.

Let's go for bad bitch Hannah. Yeah, Hannah looks like a girl boss. Like an adventurer. Can we name her Heather? Like a frail adventurer. Has she been on Token CEO? She has. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I knew I was going to pick Hannah. You're picking a woman to lead the party? I think she's got the money. Her big thing was fuck your blacksmith's apprenticeship. Yeah, no, wait. She's egotistical, self-obsessed to the point of damaging Well, we have we've done that before

with Rico. We just have practice in this. Self-obsessed to the point of damaging relationships, yeah. Yeah, that pretty much nails it. I love that. And a Rico. There's caring, forgiving and pleasant to be pretty much nails it. I love that. And a Rico. There's caring, forgiving, and pleasant to be around. Those seem like clashing ideals.

All right, let's pick her, though. We want the money. We want the money. What about the hedonistic bitch? All right, see, now we get another one. All right, we want the farmer, don't we? Or Gideon. Gideon's looking like he's got something going on.

Gideon's like a Billy type. Yeah, but that's a good thing to have. Right. Dim-witted, but I'm not saying Billy's dim-witted, but he's wild. You know what I'm saying? I will say it. He's dim-witted. Can you click on Gideon, please?

He's smart, but he's... How can you be dim-witted named Gideon? He can fit into any role in any group. This is a glue guy. This is Billy. Yeah, this is a glue guy. We want him. Yeah, whoa, holy shit. Do we want a wily guy on the trail with us?

He might lead us to a painted-on tunnel in the wall. Click the farmer. Click the farmer. We're just ignoring that. Disciples of the land, farmers have a wealth of knowledge about all manners of crops and animals. Optimistic thinks glass half full, refined, used to the finer things. I want a pessimist. Why is this an uppity farmer?

All right, let's pick him, though. No, I want Gideon. I like Gideon. Gideon's a good role player. I think we might have another chance at feeling. Gideon's probably going to fuck Hannah. Yeah, all right, go ahead, Gideon. Oh, absolutely.

Oh, no. We have to have a missionary because they keep coming up. Missionary named Philip Pognasian. No, I hate that guy. I think we got to pick him, no. We have to have a missionary because they keep coming up. Missionary named Philip Pognasian. No. Pognasian. Pognasian. Pognasian. Pognasian.

Pognasian. Pognasian. Pognasian. Pognasian. Pognasian. No, I hate that guy. I think we got to pick him, though. We can't have multiple women.

That's true. What if their cycles get lined up? Yeah. Stop and talk forever. Sent on a religious expedition. Inclined to aggressive behavior. Yes, we want it. We need that guy.

Yeah, we need that guy. He'll go fight a Native American priest. Yeah. Okay. Shit. We might end up in Rome. All right. Yeah, go fight a Native American. You want an aggressive priest? Yeah. Okay. We might end up in Rome. All right. Yeah, do it. Pick him.

Fill up. Oh, look. John's back. We can get John again. How many people are we taking? Four? Four. Why do we want a farmer if we won't have time to sow seeds?

Right. What is the point? But he knows how to find shit? I don't know. You want to go two chicks? Yes. Oh, he has wealth of animals. He knows he has a wealth of animals.

That's good. Neat. That's probably pretty good. Organized. Grace is a farmer. Dim-witted. She's dumb. Has a hard...

No, now we'd have two dumb people. Yeah, we can't. Yeah, no. All right, So get John What's the first name? Wait, wait, Skatoos? Skatoos is funny Skatoos is funny

Skatoos And charming I like this crew Oh, they're just gonna Oh, yeah Gonna fucking train Gonna change their names Heather?

Should it just be the four of us right here? Yeah, we have those four of us Alright, so Kate No, I wanna be the girl Yeah us right here? Yeah, we have those four of us here. All right, so Kate. No, I want to be the girl. All right, Nick. Thank you. I call Shadi on Gideon. All right, Kate.

Brandon will be the priest. Yes. And I'll be the farmer. Well, I should be the farmer, too. I'd like to be both. All right, make Brandon both. Oh, good. Big cat. farmer, too. Let's be both. All right, make Brandon both. Oh, good. Big cat, big cat.

Brandon, too. All right, let's do it. Look at this squad. Whoever dies first has to have another quart of nog tomorrow. Okay. Nah, we're going to be miserable. All right. Nothing like coming off an illness knowing tomorrow's eggnog day.

Hound in room temperature. Hell yeah. All right, what are we buying? Hold on. So we have... I think we just take the kit. These are full... Yeah, but there's multiple kits.

It's got everything. There's multiple kits. Or you want to customize it. I don't like that that one has plant on it. 200 meat? We need a lot of bullets. Now, remember last time when we had too many bullets and not enough money?

That's a good problem to have. You can't have too many bullets. There's bait? We're going to go fishing too? Fish. Alright, which kit we want? I think 100 bullet kit. I kind of like the one with the pig on it. Yeah, this one.

100 bullets, 10 clothes, 1 coffee, 3 medicines, 2 toolboxes. I don't like that it comes with so much meat. I do need more coffee. All right, customize. Yeah, fuck it. I don't know. We want the most durable one. The luxury wagon.

Oh, I think we get the luxury. Wait, how much money do we have? $6.50. $6.50? We can't spend $500 on a wagon. Yeah, so $2.50. That's fine. Big guy, you pick. Brandon will get the luck. Wait, how much money do we have? $6.50. $6.50? We can't spend $500 on a wagon. Yeah, so $2.50. That's fine. Big guy, you pick.

Brandon will get the same one later. Okay. Food. We're going to hunt. So we don't need too much food. Arts, grab one of each or three of each or something. Right? They come by the three.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Well. Add that shit. Add all of three. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, add that shit. Add all of them. Here you go, TJ. Gaming on. Exposed slot repair.

I could use that. Did you get food? Why does it say we're 322 in the hole? Is something already? Fix that. You have one of the kits in the... Get one of everything on the miscellaneous. Wait, what is that? This is overwhelming for me. I'm not paying attention.

You should have just bought a kit. We should have bought a kit. Yeah, this is a lot. Can we just buy a kit? How much money do we have left? I want to get on the trail. Just buy a kit. How much money do we have left? We're minus 22. I want to get on the trail. Just buy one of everything. We all got sick last time, right? Yeah, let's go.

Yeah, we're going to buy everything. Yeah. Fuck. Alright, we're going to fish. Coffee beans. Fuck yes. Stamina. Clothing Yeah Maybe more bullets

I mean Jerry needs to hunt Yeah We're down to only like 50 bucks I feel like yeah did we get any food we didn't get any food we should probably get a little bit of food yeah we have 200 meat

no we didn't buy the oh no wait what are you doing yeah keep shopping just buy a little bit of food yeah yeah oh shopping. Just buy a little bit of food. Yeah. Yeah. Boom.

Alright, we're good. We got 50 bucks to spare. Alright. Let's get the fuck on this trail. Do we need money? What? Do we need to hold some money? Yes, hold money. Is $49 enough money? Yes.

Okay. Okay. Asking me like I know. Let's fucking go. What does an achievement mean? Let's go. Yeah, let's just get out of here. Let's rest.

Get the fuck out of here. Get the fuck out of here and start hunting. We shopped until we dropped. Our oxen's bouncing up and down. There we go. Look at us walk. I hate that. You guys are walking whack as hell.

Oh, my God. Are we really going to walk like this? No. Wait, this is kind of beautiful, guys. Kansas River Crossing. Looks like a nice little hot tub. Yeah, that was really fast. That's bubbling.

Hopper the river crossing. Just get there. Avoid. Can we move our little box somewhere? Oh, shit. Isn't Terry? Oh, avoid. Are we going up or down, guys? You just take the... I have a thought.

Are we going to eat meager or Are we going to do strenuous? What's our pace going to be? Strenuous. Strenuous, and then we're going with meager. Okay. What's your thought, Nick? I think this game's trying to trick us, and it wants us to pick the shorter route. I think we picked that longer one.

Oh, yeah. Okay. But... People could be very dumb because you're going longer. You are going further. Right. I like where your head's at, though. Thanks, Kate.

So let's go the long way. The first day, let's go the long way. That's a good idea. Well, it's when we have the most energy. Yeah, let's do it. Okay. We're doing the Undiscovered Trail. It's morning breaks in Independence.

Our intrepid travelers take their first steps. Oh, this rocks. We should be just in the wagon, though. Right. It's silly to... Well, you gotta make a scene when you leave town. That's true. All of us look good.

Oh, we're gonna get updates on ourselves. That's good. Okay. I got the Lord with me, so I feel good. Spirits are high. Them and vigor. Would you fuck me? Yes. Would you fuck me? Yes.

Thank you. All right. This is good. I feel good right now, guys. It's good to be with my friends. 73 miles to, yeah. Nice out. The flowers are blooming.

This is super relaxing. Yeah. Oh, it's beautiful out here. Uh-oh. Kate finds some turtle eggs buried on the bank of a nearby waterway. The eggs might be gathered and cooked for food, though some of the party might find such an act unsavory. What should be done?

We could still see the town, and we're already eating turtle eggs. I say gather the eggs. I say leave them alone. What are we going to do with turtle eggs? I'm going to make you guys an omelet. We have bacon and hamburgers. Okay, well, later when we're starving in the Rockies. I don't think this is good for morale. Okay.

But I will let Jerry decide. Get the eggs. Yeah! Thank you, Jerry. Gather them eggs. Forgot turtle eggs is Jerry's favorite food. This is gonna kill the whole... We're all gonna get so sick. Kate, get us the eggs.

Regrettable for the mother turtle. You bitch. Oh, God. You're such a bad... Alright, well. I think you've already lost some. Yeah, I lost health. I think I had a... We lost a whole bag of cherries. What?

Our cherries? Someone stole our cherries? We have a max inventory. Oh, repack. Just throw them out. Fuck it. I don't want cherries? Someone stole our cherries? No, we have a max inventory. Oh, repack. Just throw them out. Fuck it. I don't want cherries. Who cares?

Yeah, throw them out. Won't that give you diarrhea? Yeah. Turtle eggs will, too, I assume. Oh, so you've got to shift things around like Tetris to fit the cherries back in. This game is way too complicated. This is harder than the real thing. He's right.

Throw the cherries out. Oh, yeah, TJ. Way to go, TJ. He's having so much fun right now. There we go. Sun's going down. Yeah. 52 miles to the Kansas River crossing.

Next little bitch. Oh, God! What the fuck? Wait, what? It's not every day a man falls from the sky. Oh, no! Fuck this guy! Fuck this guy.

No! Yeah, no, no, fuck him, Kate. Oh, that would have been a magic good vibes thing. You had a scarf down turtle babies. Okay, no, no. Fuck him, Kate. Oh, that would have been a magic good vibes thing. You had to scarf down turtle babies. Okay, okay. All right. You want to help him? No, I'll leave it up to you guys.

You're the brains. Move on with that comment. We'll listen to the follow-up. Okay. That was a jump scare. This is going to be crazy if people are falling out of the fucking sky. See you, bitch. Why can't these people do something about it?

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Mill about. Wagon's unpacked. All right. Yeah, let's camp around. They're going to rob us. They're going to rob us.

They're going to rob us. I don't like it. Kat, what do you think? They're going to rob us. I think we're going to get robbed. Do we keep going? There are several secrets to discover. Oh, we could fuck them too.

We could probably get pussy. Camp sites improve your health. I think we should camp. These guys look all right. All right. All right, let's trust them. This seems like an important note here. Rest campsites improve stamina.

Cooking restores health. Celebration restores morale, Oh, well then, yeah. Celebration restores morale, which Nick lost. And wash sites restore hygiene. That's morale that you lost? I lost morale, yeah. Nick lost morale because Kate ate those eggs. Oh, sorry about that.

Not accepting the apology. I think we all ate the eggs. It's the new big scandal at Barstool. Telling stories. I just want to go to bed. Stargazing, telling stories. This is a lot go to bed stargazing telling stories this is a lot of options cunnilingus

why would we stargaze yeah what the fuck I kind of want to stargaze it has the word gaze in it of course you want to do it goofball alright set up camp can we hunt All right, set up camp.

Can we hunt? I want to hunt. Let's tell stories. I like that too. I didn't wish it was going to be late. He stays up late into the night telling stories about their lives around the warm, flickering light of the campfire. If your morale still is bad after this, I hope you die. It can't be.

Yeah. Then I'm just a bad person. Good firecrackle sound. It's nice. This is relaxing. It is. I'm glad. You know what?

I'm glad we did that. Although they didn't get a good rest, they learned a little bit more about each other. That's not good. Oh, yeah. I heard the rest. All right. My composure went up, I guess. Oh, no, yo.

I'm not Kate. I'm Nick. Just a woman. I'm a woman. Shut up. That is my exact confusion. It's for your left. Nick thinks he's Kate again.

Let's go. I want to cross this river. Yeah, let's keep going straight towards that river. No more rest. I want to go all over the place. If you want to go the long way, then you want going straight towards that river. No more wrestling. I want to go all over the place. You want to go the long way, then you want to go left? I just want us to go in a big circle. I'm homesick, man.

What's that thing in the bottom right? It's a Barstool logo. Oh, what is that? Oh, that's our pack. We're still jaunty. What is that, animals? Rabbits. We should hunt them.

I guess we're not going to... The wagon trundles by a gravestone on the trailside. A solemn air impresses itself upon the party. Oh, God. We got depression. Remember that condition of the trails off the fatal porch. It sounds like we're pussies To be honest

We're not We're not built for this You know These people didn't make it very far They didn't make it far at all It's kind of on them I don't know Oh fuck

Oh it killed all our morale Oh shit Who's slacking back there That's you Brandon Oh yeah We're walking like Look at you. Oh, you are too.

I'm not. I'm walking upright. We don't have our St. John's. I thought you were fourth. Oh, you think you're the second guy. You're fourth. Hey, Jerry, this is your time. All right, let's go, Jerry. All right.

TJ, maybe you could pull up about fishing. There's a team in the water nearby. They're teaming, Jerry. All right. Donnie, tell Donnie to start making the food. We're going to start eating. Shout out teaming Jerry. All right. Donnie, tell Donnie to start making the food. We're going to start eating. Shout out Donnie, just patiently waiting out there.

For selecting a fisher, you'll play a brief mini game, which you'll have as much time you wish to fish for catches. The character that's chosen to fish will lose stamina. So who's giving their character to Jerry to fish? I feel like that would be you. You're the fish guy. But I'm the preacher. He's the outdoorsman.

Okay. All right, Jerry's controlling Big Cat. They have 25 bait. I don't want to craft anything. Big Cat they want as the fisher. I don't know. Okay. Big Cat.

Oh, look at you. There you go. All right, press those to move. Oh, my God. Oh, boy. Jerry. Jerry. Good.

This is why he's here. All right. All right, so. Come on, Jer. Uh-huh. Dat. I have full faith. Dat. Dat. I have full faith. Dat.

Press space to cast. Hold to cast further. Press... All right, this is a little confusing. Oh, what a beautiful stream. Oh, come on, Jer. Where are you going? Jer, the water's right there, buddy.

Cast in there, Jer. Let's click on, Jerry. Where are you going? Jerry, the water's right there, buddy. Gas in there, Jerry. Let's click on the water. Oh. Oh, good. Great form. Good, good. Hey. Oh.

Oh. There's a fish. It's right there. Aim towards the fish. I like the sound effects. Water. Yeah, go towards the water. You got to hold it in, I think, to go further.

This isn't good. Hold it. And... Yeah! Get him! Give him, Jerry. Go real mid, Jerry. Real mid.

Oh, he lost him. I like that little kick. Oh, right there, right there. Back n. Jerry. Oh, he lost him. Oh. Yeah, I like that little kick. That little kick. Oh, right there. Right there. Back nabbit. How do I get him up? I don't know.

Oh, they're leaving, Jerry. Oh, there's one right there. Right here. Right in front of you. Ooh. Oh, no. We're all gonna die. I think if you get it in that little circle.

This is hurting my morale for once. It hurts. Did we decide on what's the food quantity ratio? It's Jerry. It's gonna be eaten. Just walk till you see another fish. There you go. Oh, that's a good spot.

There's a whole bunch. Great spot. But how much does he need to catch for us to eat? Isn't that the whole point of the game? At least four. How much stream we got here, Jerry? Oh, man. It's peaceful now.

If he just catches anything, we'll eat. Yeah. I just don't. All right, let's go. Let's keep going, Jerry. You eat. Yeah. Alright, let's go. Let's keep going, Jerry. You're a hunter. You're not a fisher. That's tough. Wait, there's a whole other section. Can he go in the river?

Oh, yeah. See if you can drown. That's you. Yeah, I know. Oh, there's a fish right there. That's a butterfly. Or a dragonfly. Oh, there's a fish right there. That's a butterfly or dragonfly. Oh, we can't see behind the... Get it! Fish! We got it!

Yay! Pumpkin seed. Pumpkin seed. All right, Jerry. Good job, Jerry. Let's go, Jerry. All right, let's leave and maybe go hunting. We'll split this eight-inch fish across the floor of us.

Jerry, good job. Two inches of fish per. Look better than your lunch this morning, Chad. I like how pumped a guy was. Fish weighed 10 pounds. Oh, shit. 10 pounder. Was that Chris Long or Kyle Long that said your food looked CGI?

Oh, I didn't see it. I didn't see the responses. Yeah. You look gross. All right, let's leave and keep going. I didn't see it. I didn't see the responses. Yeah. You look gross. All right, let's leave and keep going. I hate to get pissed. Well done. All right, Jerry, not bad.

I got an itchy trigger finger. We all eat. Yeah, we're eating tonight. All right, where are we going? I think Donnie has maybe made some Chipotle mayo. Wow. Oh, those buns look delicious. Those buns do look good.

Does it right. Big Cat manages to catch 10 pounds of fish. All right. Thank you. Without a proper knife, he can't clean the fish, and only some of the means to obtain knives can be unlocked by completing the Bitter Winter Jersey. What?

That's not a fun phrase to say. It's like rural juror. The Bitter Winter. Bitter Winter. How do we complete the Bitter Winter Journey? So we can get a knife until the very end? We need knives. Oh, my God.

Hey, why didn't you bring a knife? I didn't even think about it. Inventory overflowed again. Yeah, let's get rid of the Bible. Yeah, fuck that. I don't have a reason to be here if we don't have a Bible. What can we get rid of? The cherries seem like they could go.

Why do we need a harmonica? We could fix everyone's morale by using this. Okay, yeah, let's use the harmonica. And then we'll find her. Yeah, we're some pussies if harmonica's gonna really help. Wow. And it was a one-time use

harmonica. So we threw it away? Alright. Ugh. Ugh. Does it count? How many? I think it'll eventually be seven.

It'll eventually be seven. Yeah. Thank you, Donnie. Oh, boy. That's a big-ass pack. What is it? Let's get rid of our medicine and food. Yeah.

I mean, where could he possibly put it? Not being able to properly pack should have been the first sign we shouldn't go on this big journey. It's true. It's that diagonal thing that's messing everything up. What is that? An axle? I don't know. Oh wow. Almost did it. Damn. Throw our money away.

I don't think there's anything we can do. What can we get rid of? I mean, what about... What's that? Cherries. Get rid of the cherries. Cherries are way too big. That seems like a lot of food. No, it's just all food, Brandon.

That's a big-ass sack of food. I don't think we can... No, but I trust... It's only one pound of food. Jerry can hide. Jerry can hide. I don't think we need a hundred bullets. We're not going to carry the fish with us?

Wait, we... We're going to leave the fish? No. Get rid of the cherries. I don't want cherries. Oh, my God. Apparently, the cherries are just a big sack of food, and it just has cherries on the back. Right, and we need food.

It's one pound of food. That's nothing. All right. Oh, fuck it. Fuck it. Get out of here. Yeah. Yeah.

Look really good. Look really good. He has really outdone himself with these burgers. Oh, wow. Oh, my God. Look at us go. We played the harmonica. There's the harmonica.

The harmonica while you were gone, it improved all of our morale. Oh, that's great. I could have figured that out. Clock of ducks suddenly scatters in the air from the water near the track. It's hunting time. Hunting. Duck hunt. Duck hunt.

Come on, Jerry. Someone might fail one of the birds with a well-placed shot, but it would take fast reflexes. Wait, what just happened? Oh, boy. We had to be quick. It was a quick top of that. Wait, what? Yep, we missed it. They left? Okay. Oh, never mind. Is this the hardest game in the world?

Fox? Okay. This is tough. Push on, I guess. They are quick. Someone might fell the birds with a well-placed shot, but it takes fast reflexes. What should be done? Well, we just gotta push on. Oh, wait. Does If they are quick, someone might fell the birds of the well-placed shot, but it takes fast reflexes. What should be done? Well, we just got to push on. Oh, wait.

Does that mean? Oh, no. There was live timers. Yeah, we missed. Oh, wow. Okay. Party ignores the birds. That's what we did.

Yeah. The birds think we ignored them. That's a fox. That's a fox. Strangle that bitch out. Does it have any eggs we can kill? Okay. I got to hanker in for some turtle eggs again, Kate.

I'm always on the lookout. Is there anything showing how far we're going? Oh, May 4th right there. Yeah. Oh, here we go. This is a cross. Why can't we just walk around? Yeah, that looks like a little pond.

Yeah, what the fuck? You know what? Ooh, who gets burger one? Let's bring it on in. Yeah. Donnie, thank you. Yeah, thank you, Donnie. You've been crushing this week.

It's the best. You brought it right to me, but... I saw Steven make a hot dog the other day. I felt really bad for him. Oh, my God. Were they terrible? I'm sorry. He microwaved them after he was done grilling them.

I know we're playing the game. Can I just get a camera on this fucking burger? Yes. Omaha Steaks, look at that. Look at that. Yeah. That's a beaut. That is a phenomenal looking hamburger.

Oh my God. Look at the juice pouring out of it. Shout out to Omaha Steaks and shout out to the Chef Donnie. Wow. Oh yeah. I'm about to eat the fuck out of this. That's a beaut. All right, boys, let's get across this river.

Next. Thank you. Let's ford it. Two and a half feet. Oh, we can walk across. Two and a half feet is how deep we can ford. Oh. Just for note.

All right, let's caulk it. We caulking it? Yeah, we're not doing a ferry. Oh, wait. We can talk and trade real quick if y'all want. Yeah, we can talk, but I don't want to trade because we have so much limited inventory. Yeah, let's just cross. Yeah, I guess we could get more gold.

Cock it. Let's cock it. We could afford this. It's only $2.. All right. Let's cock it. Let's cock it. We could afford this. It's only two and a half. Oh, let's afford it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's afford it. Fuck this river.

This shit is easy. This child's play. 61% chance. I like that. Yeah, I love that chance. Oh, my God. That's basically, I mean, if I went 61% gambling, I would be incredible. I'm going to say 100% chance we make it across.

Okay. Here we go. Oh, this is a great view. So that's what fording is, just walking right across. Yeah, we're just walking across the river. Oh, this is fine. Look at us. Everybody's cruising. We're fine.

We're going to be all wet. Make that 62% success rate. There's apparently a lot of people in the chat that have played this before because they're teaching me a lot of things. Really? Yeah. What have you learned? That we can click on animals as we walk by them to get them or something. And then we can rotate stuff in our bag to make more room.

It's really one of the better burgers I've had in a long time. Hell yeah. Yeah, pretty good. Y'all need napkins? Peace. I was afraid I wasn't going to be able to eat, but I feel like, you know when you're coming out of a sickness and you can finally eat again and you're like, fuck yeah.

I feel like this might be tipping me over the edge. We're now at the Big Blue River? Yeah, we're at leg two of leg one of the Oregon Trail. Oh, shit. Wait, what? This is a significant foray for any wagon. Wait, void of broken leg? Why are we talking about broken legs?

I've been doing that my whole life. Yeah, like that's one of the most important things you can do. We probably shouldn't forward. I bet there's like holes. Why not to break your leg? Oh, shit. Thank you, Donnie. Oh, thank you can do. We probably shouldn't forward. I bet there's like holes. I know how to break your leg. Oh shit, thank you Donnie. Oh, thank you. Okay.

Okay. Independence. What are we doing? I don't know. I don't know. There was a big exclamation point next to this. Okay. Trying to teach us things.

There's some sort of long-form game here that we're probably just going to ignore. Yeah. Which way? We've been going top. What does that mean? You want to go top again? Yeah, I kind of been... Even you have a mic in front of you. It's literally the same signal every time.

Can you guys just hit the ad while you're eating? No, because I'm eating. I'll hit it right after. Okay. You don't want me to talk with my mouth full. Which ad? On my steaks. I already did it.

Oh, shit, you did that. Oh, Stephen. My fault. It's okay. Take out my adult faces. Hey, I fucked up. It's okay. Hey, that's you did that. Oh, Steven. My fault. That's okay. Take out my adult faces. Hey, that's okay. Hey, that's okay. Yep.

What was that noise, Kate? Nothing. It's my bottom set. She just broke her leg. They only hope the trials aren't treacherous. I have a feeling they may be. They're going to be, aren't they? Uh-oh.

Oh, it's hot, hot, hot. Or something like that. Darn! Uh-oh. Big Cat. Gripped over a small bump in the road, finds himself in the dust. That's it? No.

Picks himself up. This game's just trying to embarrass you. Get the fuck up, pussy. Big Cat, you're kind of a pussy. I am. It's a problem. Hurt my morale. Hide from a little bump.

Oh, shit. I'll be getting hurt. We lost inventory. It's repacking shits. Do we have a Russian flag? Oh, that's just a hammer or a sickle. It's that part of the storage is broken now. Oh, we can't store things there now.

Right. We broke an empty space. They really made this game hard. Alright, we're good. Can we click that to repair it, TJ? Fuck that space. Don't even care. Don't even care. No.

Don't even care. Use toolboxes to repair the wagon. Use wagon grease to do something. Ah, we don't need that. Reduce the frequency of damage. Okay. So we should buy wagon grease. I want one of us to die.

Yeah, I say we just blindly keep going forward at top speed. Let's keep going. Yep. While feeding the oxen, Brandon observes that one of the beasts seems lethargic. Yep. It's breathing labored. Might be sick.

After a full day's rests or additional food, may well restore its vigor. All right, what do y'all want to do? You want to feed it or you want to let it rest? Let's rest because I don't want to give, we don't have 30 flour to give it. Okay, we're going to have to rest. We're going to have to rest. Do y'all want to do? You want to feed it or you want to let it rest? Let's rest because I don't want to give, we don't have 30 flour to give it. Okay, we're going to have to rest. We're going to have to rest.

Do y'all want to inspect the ox? Nah. Let's just let him rest. Let's just chill out. Oh, good. We fixed it. Yeah, they do. What?

Hmm. Yes? Do you guys want to hunt for more burgers, or should we just... I think that kind of went out the window, I guess. We're going to hunt, but... Alright, that's fine. Does the booth get burgers yet? Okay.

People always yell at me for chewing into the mic and I keep catching myself doing it. Apologies. Quit it. Oh, what's going on here? A little party. Campsite again? The pleasant scent of frying garlic and onion. Italians.

Oh. Keep going. They're going to try to fuck us. They're not going to try. Oh, shit. You could stump. I'd try. Oh, shit. You could stomp. I'd rather... Leave, leave.

...allians. We don't want to be near them. Yeah. You made the right choice there, guys. Next thing you know, we're in the mafia. Oh, Brennan, you just took a ding. What's the purple line? Anybody know?

What is that? Donnie, these are great. Thank you. Can we hunt at any time? Prairie dogs. I want to hunt. Yeah, I'd eat some prairie dog. Yeah, I'd eat prairie dog for sure.

Wager you can't hit one. Oh, let's go. Accept the challenge. Waited long enough for gambling. Oh, big cat. I'll do it. Go ahead, Jerry. Get up there.

You got this. Oh, look at how sad I look. What's going on? We lost a bullet. Wait, we didn't even get to do it? It just automatically does it? Yeah, that sucks. And look how slumped over I am.

I have bad body language. You kind of suck. No, hand up. I suck. I have bad body language. Oh, look at that. Who said that? How awful shot.

You know, I'm a bummer. I'm a big-time bummer. Uh-oh. Is that my morale? We already threw out our harmonica. What's this? Hmm. Alright, so this is going to be a difficult one.

This one's tough Y'all want to talk, trade, or just cross? Let's talk to see if we can get any pointers of crossing We got to be talking Big Louie? Big Louie, yeah Probably talk to Big Louie Name of a strip club at Fort Leonard Wood No kidding Right? A full nude Maybe talk Big Louie. Big Louie? Probably talk to Big Louie. Name of a strip club at Fort Leonard Wood.

No kidding. Right? A full nude. Probably want to ask about himself. About crossing the river. Yeah. He's bumped into Ben Mintz. The Florida River means... Talk to White. We know this, Big Louie. Cocked a wagon.

We know this, Big Louie. I think we ford it. Yeah. We can't ford everything. We can't ford two rivers in a row, can we? No, no. Sorry. Cocked a wagon.

I think we should cocked a wagon. This one's very difficult. Is it? Yeah, they said it was infamous. Oh, okay. So let's cock it. Cock it? Yeah. Cock it. Yeah. they said it was infamous. Oh, okay. So let's caulk it. Caulk it? Yeah.

Caulk it. Yeah. We need tragedy. Like bad. Here we go. We got this. Caulk the wagon. Caulk time.

I kind of want to see what it would look like. Oh, chance of success is 45% with a caulk. I love it. We got this. I like those odds. I like those odds. I love those odds. That's almost half the time we survive. Wait a minute.

Yeah, this is almost. Chance of success now 49%. I love that. That might as well be 100. Here we go. Oh, no. Oh, I didn't realize the oxen. Uh-oh.

They can swim, right? I don't know. Yeah, they're swimming. I'll be loving this. How deep does the water get? No, they're swimming. Oh, dude. They're loving this.

Wait, what? Easy. Easy. Easy. 49% never a doubt. Itty 49% never a doubt. Itty game. Never a doubt. You having another burger?

We lost 41 meat. We took water. We took damage. We got 152 flour. All right. We're doing all right. This can't be overstated how phenomenal these burgers are. Really good.

There's fishies. Maybe. Jerry. Maybe we have to get out on the open plains to hunt a lot of air come on Jer who's in charge of packing we just trenched through a seven foot deep lake. We lost some stuff. Somebody tell me why it rotates though. It's what the person in charge of packing would have said. Looks like there's like literally nothing you can do. I feel like somebody could just carry the Bible.

I would like to pick up the pace. We need some action. This one is going too slow. I say discard it and let's just keep fucking hauling. All right. We used it. We need deaths. We need disaster.

We need tragedy. We need disaster. We need tragedy. We need hunting. Guy wants to die. Let's eat some meat. I do want to die. I got a date with death. Fuck it. Let's go.

Yeah. Let's fucking hit the road and just go bananas on the Oregon Trail. trail. Alright, what is that? What is that? Oh. Wait. Alright, cluster of berry bushes. Oh, no. Eat them.

Into the wild? Eat them. Yeah, eat them. We got to eat them. Here comes the dysentery. Pick the berries. Not identifiable. Yeah.

That's fine. That's the best kind. Okay. Okay. Make Kate pick them. That's fine. That's fine. Make Kate pick the berries.

There's going to be a snake in that bush. You think so? Yeah. Oh. Oh. Oh, fuck. Bees. Oh, fuck.

Oh. Oh. Okay. What's all that? Okay. We're good. I still think they're poisonous. Kate eagerly bites into a berry.

I know that the berries are poisonous when Kate eagerly bites into a berry. I know. The berries are poisonous when Kate starts feeling ill. Oh, no. It's like real life. Oh, that was a bad idea. I don't know. You guys are still making me walk. I let her in the wagon.

Oh, my God. Uh-oh. This is very much real life. Uh-oh. Black beaver. Uh-oh. Yeah. Who could this be?

Who could this be? Sorry about my brother, travelers. He's very friendly, perhaps too much for his own good. You won't find anyone more reliable, though. Unfortunately, we've run into delay on our travels, and my brother's getting rather restless. Annie Halfmoon. Perhaps not much trouble. You could humor him.

Oh, fuck him. Let's go. I'll talk to Black Beaver. All right, yeah, talk to Black Beaver real quick. My father is very sick. We're going to get roped into this fucking family. I told you. You're right, Brandon.

Oh, boy. I mean, we have too many supplies. Let's leave. Get out of here. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Yeah, get out. Get, we have too many supplies. Let's leave. Get out of here. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out.

Yeah, get out. Get out. See ya. Bye. See ya. Deal with your sick father yourself. Fish team in the water nearby. Craft some bait?

Yeah. We have 10 bait, though, don't we? Oh. Oh, did we not use it last time? Did you have to rebait every time? Mm-hmm Alright, get out there, Jerry What do you want to pick? Let's go with

Brandon If God is real, he'll catch something See the requirements? A good attitude Let's go with Brandon. If God is real, he'll catch something. See the requirements? A good attitude. All right, Jerry, let's go catch some fucking fish. Oh, they're everywhere. Steady now.

Oh, steady now. Well, Brandon, you're the one fishing. What? No, you are. You're in control. There's fish right there in front of you. Money. Yeah, I'm carrying. Good boy. I hit the space. Nothing happened.

There it was. Aw hit the space. Nothing happened. There it was. Oh, shucks. Kicking the ground is so funny. There you go. There you go. Good one. Reel it.

I'm hitting the space bar. Nothing's happening. Ah, damn it. Maybe hold Was it click to reel it back in? What's chat saying TJ? Bell

Okay Yeah I mean I feel Yeah This Oregon Trail sucks It does I'm gonna just say it I can't believe Kyle made us play this version And then wasn't here

Yeah this is his greatest prank ever pulled. Should we just quit? I don't understand this. Wait, where did he have to go? The neurologist. Should we quit and yak for an hour? I'm kind of disappointed I didn't die. What do you guys think?

What's the chat saying? Put a poll up. Listen to the people. What? I can't put a poll up. The game is on. Can you pause it? Yeah. Hold on. Let's put a ball up. The game is on. Can you pause it? Yeah.

Hold on. Let's reel this one in. Wait, time out. Should we just, without hunting, fishing, eating, should we just keep going full steam ahead and just see who dies first? Yeah. See the order of death. All right.

Yeah. Get out of here. No fishing. No whatever. Except Big Cat won last time. Yeah. Let's just go until someone dies and then we'll stop. Yep.

This was Kyle's greatest prank, wasn't it? It's like, play the long version that takes forever. I'm not going to be here. I'll be the neurologist. Who the hell is this? Let's kill someone. Then let's be done. Yeah. I mean it's only May 10th

we've only gone like 5 days I feel like well 10 days big cat's morale is in the shitter it looks like crap he does not want to be here Nick you're doing great oh yeah

he lives for this shit what the hell He does not want to be here. Nick, you're doing great. Oh, yeah. He lives for this shit. What the hell? What the fuck? Fresh, I don't know. A fresh shed? Continue. We're just going. All right, we made it.

Four out of four. I don't know why you wanted to go to war. Just keep going. This all seems nice. This looks great. Let's set up camp here. Okay. I said we just power through it.

We're one-fifth of the way. This game sucks. Oh, my God. Holy shit. Yeah, this is too much. Let's get out of here. Yeah. Let's get out of here Yeah Let's just end this

It was a mistake So where did we make it to? Kansas? Yeah I mean there's one fifth PT do you want to put up a chat Just to see if the people Wanted us to keep I guarantee people are like

You think it's 90%? I don't know I don't know what they think Because I don't think this is fun. No, I'm not having fun. I was having fun with the old one. The old one felt more exciting. Yeah, this one is just too hard.

That's going too quick right now. I don't know what the L's mean right now. Does the L mean that we're back? Jerry, come back in here. Hmm. New version sucks. Yeah, it does. I'd family feud.

I mean, I'd feud it with the boys. Feud it with Jerry all day. Jerry, that wasn't fun, was it? I mean, doesn'd feud it with the boys. I'd feud it with Jerry all day. Jerry, that wasn't fun, was it? I mean, it doesn't even matter. He played at 73%. Wait, no. Okay, good. Yeah, I mean, I could feel it.

That game sucked. The old version was a lot better. Oh, yeah. Oh, that one guy waited. He didn't even let you fish. Fire Marty Mush. He wouldn't let you fish. It let you fish.

You didn't know how to fish. Just yak it up. I was pressing the space bar as soon as the fish was on. It just didn't grab. You failed us. That game sucks. Yeah. Sucks.

Sucks so bad. Shout out Chef Donnie, though. Burgers were terrific. Incredible. Yeah, it was very good. Incredible. Thank you, Donnie. Thank you, Donnie.

What was that on top? It was great. Caramelized onions? Yeah. How do you say that word? Caramelized onions? Caramelized? Yeah, I said caramelized onions.

Jerry, we're streaming tonight? It's you. Yeah. There's one burger left. I got to switch my dinner around. Oh, what time's your dinner? Seven. Who are you going with? One of my buddies.

Who? Uh-oh. One of my buddies. Who is it? You know who. I don't want to say the name. Huh? Why would I know who?

Ken. Jerry's got a sugar daddy. I don't. Stop. Don't do that. No, I like him. He's a great guy great guy thursday's dinners yeah it's nice it's great yep i love him he's a great guy always treats me always never looks at me to pay he's a good guy yeah it's like uh like he he just wants you to hang out and like he'll pay for everything it's not a sugar daddy no no we never talked like that Yeah. So how was the French bar?

It was great. Was it actual French people? Yeah, so he's a big Back Again fan straight from Paris. Oh, that's sick. Yeah, he's been in New York for... From where was he? Paris. From Paris.

Paris. I like the way you say it. That's what it's called. Well, it's called Paris. No, that's what you call it. It's called it's called. Well, it's called Paris. No, that's what you call it. It's called Paris. No, but it was fun, though. Friends, vive le bleu.

You're going to win it all. I think so, too. Well, Argentina looked pretty good, too. That's a hell of a final. Yeah. What do you think is a fair cash out? If I give you $1,000? Why?

Because I want Argentina to win. But if Argentina wins. It doesn't affect anything. It wins the money. I give them $2,000. No, no, no, no. Oh, really? Oh.

Yeah. If Argentina wins, it gets $3,000, doesn't it? Yeah, $100 from everyone else and $2,100 from me. My point is I want to root for Argentina, but then I would lose. Oh, so you wouldn't have to give me the money. So I would cash out. I'd give you a grand. That's too much.

No, no. I'd give you a grand and then... Do $500. Give him a grand. Give me and Kate $500. No, you know what? We'll let it roll. We'll let it roll.

Yeah. Fuck it. We'll let it roll. I'll try, Kate. What did you guys do? We did. We made a World Cup bet on the action. That's cool.

It's been fun. It's crazy how fast it's gone. It really is. World Cup just goes. I've been enjoying it a lot. I mean, it's one of those things that, like, free sports in the middle of the day is just the best. It's like, hey, it's 2 o'clock. Let's watch sports.

It's a pretty good background sport, too. Yeah. It's a great napping sport. Oh, it's a great napping sport. It's a pretty good background sport, too. Yeah. Oh, it's a great napping sport. It's also a great hungover sport. Because sometimes when you're so hungover on a Saturday, this hasn't happened to me in a long time, but when I used to be really hungover on a Saturday,

you just want to see some grass and a ball move. Yeah, primal. It's peaceful. The nap, you can take that light nap, and then the announcer will wake you up on his time. Yep. And then you don't have to watch the others. Oh, yeah, let's talk about Grant Cardone.

What is this? Oh, yeah. What happened? Yeah, last night. So what is this? Man, guys, appreciate you dragging on me. Give me some attention there on your Twitter page. You guys, hey, look, if you guys can make sense of making $400,000 a year and you figured out

how to still take care of your wife, two kids, mom and dad, brothers, still help out with the community, still give to the military, you guys figured out how to do that. Is this the Oregon Trail music or is this his? Oh, it is.

Oh. Oh. Oh, my God. he really went all out. Couldn't help mom. Couldn't help my dad. Couldn't help my brothers. Wait, what is his point here? The military.

You can't live on less than $400,000 a year. You should be ashamed. What? Be ashamed. Because unless you make over $400,000, you can't support your family, kids. That's fake news. Who is this? What is?

Well, he's getting sued right now. Really? For what? Not 10Xing? Pretty much, brothers. That's fake news. Who is this? What is... Well, he's getting sued right now. Really? Yeah. For what? Not 10Xing? Pretty much, yeah. Do you think 10X was a fraud? I commented on this post.

What'd you say? So did I. I forget. I commented on it yesterday. Wait, are you telling me that the 10X mindset is not real? Vic, I don't even... You're twisting my brain now. What you said is blasphemy

what the fuck I thought this guy was straight and narrow and just really told the truth you'll see this is all going according to his plan so $400,000 if you don't make $400,000 a year you're a beta you should be ashamed as a husband

that's a lot of money. What? Yeah, what? Where? Well, then Big T or somebody. That's a shitload of money. Brandon, are you bringing

that into contract negotiations? Yeah. Just be like, my family. Do you make that now, Brandon? No, I do not make $400,000 a year. All right.

Oh, you don't? Sure don't. Oh, you all do. Oh, yeah. How do you go home and face your family every night? Rico could have been making $400,000 a year. No. No, he couldn't.

Not even close. No. Not to make it about him or me, but if he ever does, I quit immediately. He will not. I quit immediately. He will not. I mean, he's going to fail, probably. What? I mean, he will not I mean he's gonna fail probably

what I mean I'm gonna he's probably not gonna change just a crazy decision you guys made Dave made no I'll take ownership cause people people are probably right

like if I had told Dave I don't want him back Dave probably would've listened to me so I'll take ownership on that I was very 50-50 I should've

I mean who knows maybe it was a mistake. Time will tell. If he changes, it'd be awesome. It would be awesome. What do you want him to change into, though? To stop letting, like, to one, stop, like, fighting with everyone at this office over the smallest things.

Get rid of all the beefs that consume. All the beefs are gone. Clemmer went up to him this morning. Yeah? And what happened? Fresh slate, Clemmer said. Right. Like, you have a chance.

You have a second chance. I'm a believer in second chance. He has a second chance. If he can make good of it and not be, like, vicious to people inside this office, we'll see. Maybe it was a mistake. Are you making me think it was a mistake, Brandon? I'm not saying it was or it wasn't. Did I make a mistake? Huh? Did I make a mistake. Are you making me think it was a mistake, Brandon? I'm not saying it was or it wasn't. Did I make a mistake?

Hey, it's yes. I'm not saying it was or wasn't, yes. Well, I am going to be the one. No, I thought you said. He does something. It's me and Dave. Like, we're the ones to blame. I thought you said, can I make a mistake?

Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. If we made a mistake, I'll own it. Well, I think it'd be Kahn's fault, really. Yeah. You should direct everything to his fault. I still think Kahn's was put in a crazy spot there. So, yes, but it was also private, and I do think Kahn's a forgiving guy.

But, yeah, you might be right. I should probably talk to Kahn's and be like, did I fuck that up? If Dave came up to me and asked me to make a decision i'd make the one he wanted but dave didn't say like i want but it is implied with okay so that was a mistake then i own it no no no no if you listen to zero it could turn out to not cons explains i think it's too early to say what did khan say boy got to tune into Zero Block 30. That tweet was. He said he didn't feel pressured. He said that he did it because. There's a promo out if you want a promo.

If he changes. You can't say it's a mistake yet. He just paid lip service to me. I haven't seen anything that illustrates that. And this is absolutely a fake thing. I mean, Dave and Dan put down the ultimatum. If you don't apologize to cons, you can't come back. That's all this is absolutely a fake thing. I mean, Dave and Dan put down the ultimatum. If you don't apologize to cons, you can't come back. That's all this is. He wanted to apologize to cons.

That wasn't how it went down. If not, he did this for years. Like, this isn't a momentary mistake because he's drunk or he's high or he had a bad day at work. This was a conscious effort for years to do this to cons. And to do it to cons is fucking insane like of all the people at barstool to come at cons and come at cons's family is fucking absurd and i don't just fired up he was very fired up he was very fired up because he loves alex and him have a private text there but yeah i mean it wasn't i don't think that's exactly how it went down i don't

think dave was like like he has to I think Dave was like, I've heard what's happened. Dave said, if we're going to even have a conversation, Rico, you have to figure out the thing with Cons. And until Cons is cool with it, we're not even having a talk. He says he felt zero pressure from Dave and he said he

completely made the choice on his own with his wife. Cons is a good guy. He is. I said he's 10 times better guy than, well, he's 100 times better guy than Rico. I wouldn't have made that decision, so I respect the hell out of him. Yeah. That man made a mistake. Family stuff.

That man might have made a mistake. If the man changes and taps into what makes him entertaining and charismatic and only focuses on that and not all the other shit that goes on his head, it's not a mistake. What are the chances he's able to do that? Probably low. Very low. Extremely low.

I just hope Rico doesn't come for the beef. I'll have to kick his ass. If he does anything like that, everybody comes out. I mean, there's certain things that if he does, it's not even a question. He's gone. You never know. New day. Now I'm thinking I made a mistake.

No, you can't call it a mistake, but you also can't. It's not, like, fair, I guess, but you can't call it. Yeah, that's the thing. Yeah. Probably isn't fair, you're right. I don't think it's fair to call it a mistake yet either. Hmm. Waiting game. Gary, what do you think? But I don't think it's fair to call it a mistake yet either. Waiting game.

Gary, what do you think? I think I've got to get something off my chest. Yeah? Yeah. Two weeks ago, I get a DM from Rico. Uh-oh. And he says, hey, I need to borrow one of your top guys for an inside job. I said, okay, no problem. What's it pertain to? He's like, just need to borrow one of your top guys for an inside job. I said, okay, no problem.

What's it pertain to? He's like, just let me get one of your guys. I guess his guys, they're not controllable. No. And I gave him one of my guys not knowing what was going to happen. And I think he used my top guy for one of those things. For this? Yeah.

Which last night I reprimanded my guy question can i ask a question yeah this is crazy why the fuck do you have guys we need guys don't know guys in your corner yeah not see my beefs are never like that my beefs are kevin like kevin conley type i've seen the jersey jerry army go to war. Yeah, but I'd never do the family thing. We don't get into that over at the JJA. But I think I would like to know for certain. I think it is. I reprimanded him last night. He had no problem with the suspension, so I'm guessing it was that guy.

Suspension from what? You know, Twitter. You guys are not normal. It's not that. Oh, nothing's normal. Okay, like I put out a signs bet, right? I want my guys pushing it. You know what I mean?

Push it. Push it. Retweet it. Push it out. Jerry Fragrance, push it. Push it. Send it to your friends. You know what I mean?

You always need guys like that. But this was, this was, I mean, I had no idea what was going to come I think it happened to be that guy Well, this is fucking weird Yeah, I mean, they're weirdos It's also like, that's Part of the crazy is entertaining in terms of Barstool. You don't have any guys.

Me? No. I don't have any guys. I've seen guys defend you. Maybe, but I don't have them. I don't tell them. Oh, you don't talk to them. Then you're saying, I gotcha. Do you have like a group chat with your guys?

Like how do you control the guys? No, they're in control. Trust me. They're controlled. They're not like Rico's guys. Wait, they're in control. Trust me. They're controlled. They're not like Rico's guys. Wait, time out. I'm sorry. Because I need guys.

Are these like fans at first were like reply guys to you? Yeah, exactly. So then you reach out to them and you're like, would you like to be Team Jersey Jared? Yeah, exactly. Now you're in this group chat and here's how I. Yeah, there's a bunch of people in there. Like, you know, if I put out a good good video like they're retweeting it they're yeah pushing it out you know they're the ones that are commenting like

jerry you made dan that wasn't one of my guys no i couldn't be i'm honest with that no it wasn't one of my it was funny tweet it was it's like yeah jerry made dad no that's funny the guys The guys are the problems. Or it's actually not the guys. It's the guy who's running the guys. Yeah, that's the thing. He doesn't put them in timeout. No.

Okay, well, I'm going to say right now, Rico should get rid of all of his guys. I said that. I think so, too. I said you have to get rid of all of them. You have to tell them to stop. Get rid of the guys. Get rid of all that. Unblock everyone.

Get rid of every guy. The next time Jeff Madu is in this. Oh, that's. Walk up to him, shake his hand and say, sorry. Yes. Has the big man made a statement? He tweeted a statement coming soon.

Yeah, no. He needs to do content with Nadeau. He just has to. Otherwise, he's gone. That was part of the conversation I had with him. I was like, this is all over. All this shit is over. I'm out next week. All week?

I got to go to Wyoming and do interviews for the Barstool Bowl. That'll be fun. That'll be awesome. That'll be a lot of fun. Yeah, I think Rowan said no, so I got to go. You got this. You got this. You got to interview Barrow, man.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Just like you said no to the pro football show and I had to. Yeah, I'm saying no to more stuff. missed your second choice i said no because i was doing something else you should interview barrel man i would if i can find him i'll do it you gotta find barrel man anything barrel man hit us up anybody knows anything else we can do in cheyenne wyoming you should hunt a bison cheyenne yeah you should organ trail it You want me to just do the organ trail while I'm out there? A little bit. Start at Cheyenne and go the rest of the way. I would like you to be dressed as a prospector.

Done. Cool. Alright, so we got the, we're going to do the Christmas exchange tomorrow. Very excited. We should go ahead and spin the regular wheel. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. But first, rowback. But buddy, let me tell you about my friends at Roback. They not only have the best quarter zips in the game, the best hoodies in the game, the best everything in the game,

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performance ones but this one it's really nice i like it a lot you dress well you dress thank you you wear a lot of roback too i do i do i. I do. I love Roebuck. Yeah. Roebuck's the best. Joggers all weekend. Thank you. That's Roebuck. The pants make your face look handsome. It's unbelievable. It's unbelievable. It is nice.

Your dick look good, too. Yeah. I'm excited for our Christmas special. I am, too. I'm going to black out. Yeah? Yeah, I think so. Hell yeah, you are.

Love that. I don't know. I don't think I've ever had eggnog. I might hate it. It's bad. I don't like it. It's terrible. I'm not a big fan of it. I was hoping more for like rum shada kind of thing. Yeah. What about the Conquito?

That's the best. What's Conquito? I don't know. People on my block drink it all the time. Conquito, that's like the Hispanic version of eggnog. Okay. It's got rum in it. Yeah, I heard that is good. Spiced rum in there.

That'll be good. It's, I guess, horchata adjacent. Okay. I could be wrong. We're going to have some fun. We have a blast. Boudet is coming in. We need it.

Tensions have been high. How damn do we need it? It's my fault. I made a mistake. Oh, forget that. Stop that. I did. I'm Oh, forget that. Stop that. I did. I'm starting to regret it.

I am. I'm starting to regret it. Did you give O'Day a set list, or is he just waiting? No, I told him whatever he wants to do to entertain the people. A lot of power. Does he know he's coming in at two, not one? He's not coming in at two. He's coming in at four.

It's going to be a three-hour episode tomorrow. That will be. We're going to do a one-hour yak. Yep. And then we're going to start the Christmas special. At 2. Well, we have to set up. 2.15, 2.30.

I think we have to set up the room. I have my outfit ready. And then what kind of eggnog are we getting? Oh, goddammit. Because we're getting the pre-made. I'll give you my card and you just go get a bunch. Yeah. Okay.

But we're getting the pre-made with booze, Rios. You get a pre-made with and without. Yeah, get some without as well. We'll add some mezcal or something. I might try and get Coquito. I might try and find, figure that out. I can get you some. I mean, that would be, if you're here tomorrow,

that'd be sweet. Down the block, they drink it. Your block sounds fascinating. Your block sounds fascinating. The block sounds great. Not the best. Okay, never mind. It sounds like a tight-knit community. Doesn't Frank live on your block?

Frank actually lives adjacent to me. I picked up Doug's at Frank's block or Frank's apartment the other day. They live in the same spot, right? Yeah. I wanted to go shop at that grocery store. No, you don't. I don't? Don't.

It looked fantastic. No, it's not. I don't? Don't. It looked fantastic. No, it's not. Really? I love new grocery stores, though. I love exploring new grocery stores. You just take walks with Frank sometimes, right? I think it's overwhelming. Yeah, people don't understand.

Me and Frank are tight. Yeah. Tight. We take walks. We hang out. We go out to eat together. Frank's my guy. Yeah.

I love Frank. One-on-ones with Frank are nice. Yeah, they are. They are. I'm happy I lifted his suspension on that one Sunday. He loves Sundays. He does. He loves being with the boys.

He does. He does. I know it's his favorite thing. Was the suspension just lifted for good now? Yeah. I talked to him, and he was very good on Sunday. Yeah. I was just like, it's everyone's stream.

One-on-one, Frank, man. One-on-one. him and we he was he was very good on sunday yeah i was just like it's everyone's stream 101 frank man 101 something else i should just you ever just think about him being the court clerk oh my god so how did he do it i wish i could see like just oh i wish it was a shell you could see the video of i just like to think that every now and then somebody would get suspended or whatever, sentenced to something, and he would have a song for every charge. Oh, Frankie. I mean, he had a song as soon as Mintz got arrested. Yeah. Yeah, and that came out of nowhere. And he didn't know it was a prank.

Did he not? I don't think so. What was it? Silver Cuffs to the tune of silver bells? That's what he was doing. He's quick with it. Oh, he definitely sang that in a courtroom before. Oh, yeah. Silver cuffs.

Oh, yeah. You want to spin the actual wheel? Great mind. Let's spin the wheel. We're name wheeling it today. No, dry. Are you sure? Yeah, I think so.

Oh. Oh. Right on the head. You were very nonchalant about that. I felt it in my bones. It was dry. Yep. Dry ass cake.

It was dry. Did you move your dinner? It's getting moved right now. I made the text. Steven, you going to be here for the stream? Yes, we're doing it. Yeah. Steven still owes me a lunch or a dinner. I owe you a dinner, yeah.

Yeah, you do. We're going to do it. Buck Steelers. We got to do it soon, Steven. Yeah, we were going to do it last week or the week before. Then there was no stream. Do you think the Bucks are going to win it soon, Steven. Yeah, we were going to do it last week or the week before, then there was no stream. Do you think the Bucs are going to win this weekend, Steven? Let's actually sit in with them.

Wow. It's incredible. They're a bad football team. We all need tomorrow. I'm putting out bad tape. Yeah. Oh, you're putting out bad tape? Yeah, I did a Telestrator breakdown.

Whoa. You've never put out bad tape. It's finally time. Who's it on?ader breakdown. Whoa. You've never put out bad tape. It's finally time. Who's it on? Whole team. Oh. Whole team's getting it from Shea. Well, offense, offense.

Oh. But it's a lot. It's everybody. Brady Evans, offensive line. One of your offensive linemen follow me, Steven. What's up? One of your offensive linemen follow me. Who?

I don't know. Luke Gedeke? Tritty Werf, maybe? Tristan Werfs? Tritty? Maybe that guy. Tritty Werfs. Very good player.

All pro. But he's injured. Maybe not for long. What led you to... Oh, is he back this week? Practiced today, yeah. Whoa. What are you going to say, Brandon?

What led you to guess the guy that you guessed that would follow Jerry? Thinking about what stoolies are on the offensive line. What was the name, Steven? Luke Gedeke, but Tristan Murph is the guy. You have a 53-man roster. He knows that roster. You know everyone that's a stoolie? Do you name every single person on the roster?

Yeah, I think so. Who's your long snapper? Zach Treiner. Who's your backup long snapper? Don't have one. Who's your backup left guard? I guess Robert Haynes would be the backup. Who's your long snapper? Zach Treiner. Who's your backup long snapper? Don't have one. Who's your backup left guard? I guess Robert Hainsey would be the backup. He's the center.

Who's your gunner on special teams? We have several. Zion McCollum is a rookie, and he is the most exciting. This is absurd. The most exciting gunner? Yes. No, like when I was down there, I was telling the higher ups, I was like, we're done, you know, whatever.

But I was just saying how I love watching Zion McCollum play special teams. What's his normal position? Corner. He's not very good. Name all your tight ends. So we got Cam Braid, obviously. Cade Otten. Co-Keefe does technically a tight end, but he plays fullback.

Yeah. And? And? Wow, you're forgetting a big one. Yeah. You don't know this team at all. It's Christmas. Damn.

Holiday season. How could you? How could you? Jesus. Holy fuck. Talk about stoolies. This one pays me. Co-Keeft. Hmm? Oh, Kyle fuck. Talk about stoolies. This one pains me. Co-Keeft.

Oh, Kyle Rudolph. Oh, there we go. He's inactive pretty frequently. What about? A lot of K names. Wait, scroll down a little. I wouldn't notice. What about your nose tackles?

Rakim Nuchez-Ronias. Rakim is nacho, number 56 nacho we'll count that um akim hicks vita vea will golston's technically a defensive lineman you're missing one okay um akim hicks vita nacho um uhatty Body, number 90. Squatty Body. Nope, nope, not number 90. All right, can I say their number? Do you know everybody by their number? No, is his last name, fuck, is his last name Day?

It was 95. Yeah, he's super short and very thick. What? You said very. Very. Very thick. It's 95. Yeah, no, that's what I'm thinking of.

This is troubling. Not Austin Day. I'm getting guys confused. Deidre Sanat? Oh, yes, yes. He's been on and off our roster. He was in a camp body and then got cut. He came back, I think, three or four weeks ago.

He was a rotating piece. He had a nice tackle for a loss a couple weeks ago. What was the down and distance? I don't have a McVay memory like that. I don't know. It would have been cool if you did. I have a meeting for the Arizona Bowl pregame show that I have to go to at 2.30. Okay.

What do you have to go do? I have a meeting for the Arizona Bowl pregame show. And the halftime show as well. We'll have fun. I'll miss y'all. You should go to the ostrich farm when you're out there. The Arizona Bowl. It was the most fun I've had

on any work trip. Well, it was so fun about it because those birds are terrifying. They attack you, but it doesn't really hurt. It's funny. And then they have a stingray tank where you can pet them. It was very fun. They have the largest snake on record. I went in and touched it.

Right where the Arizona Bowl is going to be. Yep. Huh. I love Arizona. Good ass time. Love it. Arizona, yeah. I lived there.

Yeah. The best climate. Three and a half years. So nice. You were in Arizona for three and a half years? I like when it's cool at night, too. It's awesome. Yep.

And it was my first time in, like, a desert. It's awesome looking. It's the best. It's the best. We used to go, and I lived in California on long weekends when we'd have, like, whatever, tubing out there on the Salt River. It's like you're in the middle of a desert with cactuses, but you're floating in a tube. It's, like, it's the best.

I have a really good friend in Scottsdale that I'm going to try to like live with yeah that's where i lived it was great i don't even remember when you went for the arizona bowl and then none of us went brutal so awesome went out there to film a video i was out there for a week play at halftime it was nicky's big break showed up and took a picture of a cactus and we're like, check your email, dude. So I actually have an extremely unfortunate story from a woman sitting in front of me on that flight. Whoa. So it was from Newark and it was going to Phoenix, I guess. And I would think it's a pretty standard flight.

We had an emergency landing because the plane ran out of gas or didn't have enough gas to get to Phoenix. So we landed at the El Paso airport. And the woman in front of me stopped the stewardess and was like, hey, I'm actually connecting to go to El Paso. Can I just get out? She was like, did you check a bag? She was like, yes. She was like, so you can't get out. So she had to wait

like an hour while we refueled. I thought she was going to die. I know. I'm here to see my dying dad or something. Oh my God. That happened to me

not an emergency landing, but I was going to Chattanooga and I had a layover in Atlanta. But I guess the drive from Atlanta to Chattanooga is an hour and a half. We had a three hour delay. So I was like,

let's just fucking rent a car. Yeah. We checked the bags. But I got to, let's just fucking rent a car. Yeah. We checked the bags. But I got to fly on the shortest domestic flight. Ooh. Yeah. How long was it? 20 minute flight.

Wow. Wow. Very nice. Atlanta, Chattanooga, Delta. Chattanooga. All right. Should we wrap it up? Wrap it up.

Yeah. Sorry for the. Happy birthday, Quigs. Happy birthday, Quigs. Sorry for the Oregon Trail. That was our mistake. But the thing is, it wasn't like we built a special episode around it. We learned.

No, no. Whoever's idea that was. It was a bust. It was a bust. It was a hard- A daily show. We're allowed. Yes.

We missed. Burgers were not a bust, though. Let's do one family feud for Jerry to cleanse the palate. I think that's a good idea. Jerry, you got this? Yep. All right. You, you got this? Yep. All right. You got this, Jerry.

Yep. My son is one bite away from getting permanently kicked out of daycare. I saw that. And so I keep checking the app like a lunatic. Everybody knows the rules. I want to guess the top, you're saying? You should get him a one bite one thing. A reminder. When women get bored,-bite one. Reminder.

When women get bored, name something they change. Clothes. When women get bored, something they change. I think there's an obvious one. Small-ass font. Gender. Oh, my God. Got to keep the lady entertained.

Something they change. What do they change? That outfit, that's clothes. They always post a picture and said, I did a thing. What do they change? Plastic surgery. Plastic surgery. Husband, boyfriend.

There you go. Let me change. Friends. Oh, good one. That says house decor. That would be friends. That would be friends. Wait, what?

All right, we'll let the timer. Hair? Hair. It's haircut. Hair. It's hair. It's definitely hair.'s haircut. Hair. It's hair. It's definitely hair, Jerry. Bangs.

They're always going bangs. Yeah. I do do that. Stop experimenting, ladies. I do that every year. Not direct attack. All right, Jerry, it's bangs. Wait, is that fucking?

How did that guy move? Yeah, because he got hair. He got hair. Oh. All right, here we go, Jerry. We got to get. Next round. Name something that's really, really hairy.

Legs. Ooh. Show me legs. Yeah, human. Looks like we're going animals now. Spider. Okay. Tarantula. No. Dog. Yeah.

Hairy. Hairy. Dog and... Cat. Yeah. Cats are furry. Are they? They are furrier than a... Okay. Harry.

What would be number one? Yeah. Horse. Horse, yeah. Maybe a horse. A yak? Buffalo? What about like the Yeti?

Like what's that thing? The Sasquatch? Yeah, that's the one. Sasquatch. Oh, I'm sorry. What's number one? I have no idea what number one would possibly be. Skunk.

Skunk. Oh, yeah. Yeah, no shit. Fuck. They're pretty hairy. Yeah. That's a fair number one. Dalton, you son of a bitch.

God damn it. This guy's crushing us. We're getting Daltoned. Let's run the table here. Name an occupation where you have big egos. Name an occupation where... Hmm. Huh.

It's hard to... No. Teacher? Politician, yeah. Yeah. Doctor? Yeah, doctor would be a good one. Surgeon?

Big ego. What about like pilots? No, I don't know. They should have big egos. They should. And doctors. Oh my god, I'm sorry. Musicians?

Oh yeah. Musicians. Actors. Oh. Whose employees have bingos? What is that? Oh, fucking employees. Wait, that makes no sense.

I feel like a doctor's employees wouldn't have bingos. No, I don't think that's... Oh, shit. That's not a well-written question. Oh, my God. I blame the question. Alton's crushing right now. 69. Damn it.

This is bad, Jerry. Yeah, this is... None you could do. That was a tough question. Stockbroker, athlete. How do we match athlete? Damn it. Do we even make it to the last thing?

I don't think so. He whopped you. One more, one more, one more. Rematch. That's it. I want to get rematch. This round's going to go's bullshit. He whomped you. One more, one more, one more. Rematch. One more, one more. That's it. I want to get rematch. This round's going to go totally differently. I can feel it.

Let's run the table here. New slate. Fresh slate. Come on. Let me get locked in. Locked in? Yep. You going to play it?

I'm waiting for the ad. Yeah, I think we probably have an ad in between the games or something, like a pop-up ad. You guys ever fall for a pop-up ad? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, definitely. Definitely. Yeah.

Not recently. I fall for Instagram ads all the time. Oh, yeah. You know what's messed up? I ordered something. They were these Super soakers on Instagram. I ordered two of them. It was like 60 bucks each

and they just never came. I reached out to the company. Nothing. Nothing. The company disappeared. I ordered a hoodie in like January. It just never came. I'll never order anything

off Instagram ever again. Pat was like, I got the baby this awesome guitar for toddlers online. I was like, I got the baby this awesome guitar for toddlers online. And I was like, I know what you're talking about. I've been getting ads for it, too. He's just got our son pop-up ads from his leg. It's a gas ship, for sure.

I'm so spoiled by Amazon, though. Instagram ads, though, it's just junk toys that I buy every time. I do every time. They always are junk. Every time they show up, I'm like, this toy sucks. Yeah, those fucking wands I got. You don't care about

putting your card information in? Instagram? Yeah. Should I? I don't know. I got beat. I'll never do it again. What happened?

They never showed up. Contact the company via email, nothing. Oh. Yeah, I guess that's true. All right, here we go, Jerry. Just make it so easy to buy shit Quick

I know Apple Pay is wild Apple Pay has ruined me Apple Pay is funny money It's not real I'm gonna crush this crumb Oh Fuck Austin

Alright Jerry here we go Let's do it Name something that might happen while you're driving That would make you mad Ooh Speeding What? happen while you're driving that would make you mad? Speeding. What?

What would make you mad while you're driving? Tailgating? Someone right behind you? Traffic. Traffic? Yeah, Nick, that's a good one. Keep going with Nick. Oh, what the?

What? Oh, fuck. What would make you mad? It's got meat in it. Phone ringing? Oh boy. Dustin has zero too. Like a slow driver in front of you.

Bad driver. Out of gas. What the fuck's that say? There you go. Cuts you off. Cuts you off. I would have bet traffic was number one. We need a big round. Oh Dustin. Oh 80. Oh boy. He heard you off. I would have bet traffic was number one. We need a big round.

Oh, dust. Oh, dust. Oh, 80. Oh, boy. He heard you call him a crumb. Yeah, we need a big round here. Okay. Name a profession you shouldn't get into if you have bad aim.

Hunting. That's a good one. Is it a profession? Okay. Yeah, okay Soldier? Military, yeah Group? A quarterback?

An athlete Yeah, athlete's probably a good one Surgeon? What about a cop? Oh What is that, Pat? Yeah, no, no, you're right. That's a good one.

Yeah. Number one. Number one. Damn, Jerry. Number one. You got it, JJ. I don't know doctor. That's probably-

Maybe heart surgeon. Heart surgeon. Maybe heart surgeon. Aim thing? Maybe heart surgeon. I feel like I'm pretty bad. Oh, my God. Oh.

Aim. What do you need? Darts? Yeah. We should put out like a- Darts? Yeah. We should put out like a... Darts. Yeah. Oh, sharpshooting.

Porn? Yeah, that's it. Porn. Bad aim could be a problem. I think you ruined that question. Oh, come on. We had them. We had them against the...

Basketball. Oh, archery isn't a profession. We had them. I've never met a full-time bowman. Are we back? Yeah, we're back. Oh, shit. We're him. I've never met a full-time bowman. Are we back? Yeah, we're back. We're back. Come on.

All right. Triple points. Name something that ends with the word code. Sheet code. Sheet, yeah. That would have been my number one. Code. Code.

Bar code. Oh, yes. Code. Bar code. Oh, yes. Good job, Jerry. Guy code? Dude code? Yeah, guy code. Guy code? Is it guy code?

I don't like that answer, really. We can't miss here. No, we can't miss. Bar code. What other words? Fire code. Oh, fire code? Fire code, fire code, fire code. I don't know, Dan. I don't know. No, don't type code. Don't type code. Oh, fire code? Fire code, fire code, fire code.

I don't know, Dan. I don't know. Yeah. No, don't type code. Don't type code. Don't type code. I don't think that's it. It doesn't matter.

Oh! Are we done? Are we? Yeah. We're going to be stuck forever in this game. I have never struggled. Alarm code, pass, okay. Dress code.

I have never struggled. Force code. Area code. My brain is jelly. This is bad for us. This is bad for us. He drilled us. All right, we got to go again. Those are obvious, too. My brain is jelly. This is bad for us. It drilled us. All right, we got to go again.

Those are obvious, too. We're getting smoked. Is it frustrating for people in the chat that we're missing these? It ought to be. Are they? Yeah. But I think they know we're not smoking. They're a little behind. They're spamming zip.

Okay. That didn't play out well. Dang. Well. Man. How'd we do that? We should be better than this. Yep.

Excited for tomorrow. Very excited. Me too. I haven't gotten in the full holiday spirit yet, and I'm definitely a Christmas fan. What's going on right here? What's going on right here? So I think this is the whole merch purge,

and I think this is where the vultures come in. Oh, the vultures come in. Oh. Oh, God. There they are. Picking the bones. Christmas shopping. Picking the bones.

Shameless. A lot of it I found last year is just the blank t-shirt templates of what they end up using oh yeah so i got like a bunch of plain gray haines no that's anus whatever oh that's right yeah i was wondering what that one dot was yeah yeah you you took our merch that we were i never got a sample of that look at this everyone's going for it what is it oh i love it she loves it take What is it? Oh, I love it. She loves it. Take it. Take it.

Take it. It hurt my feelings. Oh, no. It's already in the discard pile. You're discarding it again? Have you guys ever gotten a DM of your merch in a Goodwill yet? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

It hurts. I just saw a really good one in Buffalo, one of our best pieces of merch. It's like, oh, all right. It kind of sucks. Big T getting in. There's Hennessy Joe. Oh, Hennessy Joe's not missing that. Everybody coming out of the woodworks.

Oh, there's a lot of Pardon My Cheesesteak stuff. Yeah, but look. It's the hot ticket item. Yeah. What is this? I don't understand what it is. It's just free merch. Yeah, it's the end of the year, clearing out the upstairs merch closet. Because they have so many samples from every single thing that it's like... I have an announcement.

I'm cleaning the pile on Saturday. Whoa. You want to bet? Yeah, I do. Okay. I would bet you on that. All right. So. You want to bet? Yeah, I do. Okay. I would bet you on that. All right.

So it's going to be completely reorganized. Completely reorganized. I'm going to do another auction for charity. Yeah, but you say that every time. And I've done it like four times. Yeah, but it's never organized. Talking about being neat. Cleaning the pile.

All right, whatever. I'm going to tweet it, and then you have to... I'm going to say Jerry's holding me to it. Yeah. But your cleaning is just like, oh, I'm going to get rid of this, this, this, then that, and it's just still a pile. It's not like... Well, yeah, it regrows.

Pretty quick. What's the etiquette? I would say any more than three pieces out there, and you're starting to look a little... Yeah, but it has to be three separate pieces. What do you mean? What if somebody grabbed three of the same hat? You know they're giving them out. You're right, yep.

It's got to be three separate pieces, no more. Oh, nice, Zico got her hands in something. What's that? What's Zico got? Eight items more. Oh, nice. Tico got her hands in something. What's that? What's Tico got? Eight items there. Oh, shit. Tico, oh, boy. Solid haul.

Oh, yeah. Who doesn't love a freebie? What happened to the- If the pile isn't cleaned by Sunday, I'm giving Jerry $1,000. Perfect. Deal. And if it is, Baccarat 540 for me. Yeah, the travel bottle.

What? We used to have all types of outfits up front. Yeah, theft was at an all-time high. Oh. Was that really what it was? I believe so, yeah. Oh, God. It looked nice when you came in.

I thought it looked good. It was a good look. I thought so, too. I'd be fine putting it behind some glass. Yeah. It made me feel good, too, when we had a guest to grab them something. Grab something. Yeah. I was very... I thought so, too. That'd be fun, putting it behind some glass. Yeah. It made me feel good, too, when we had a guest to, like, grab them something. Grab something.

Yeah. I was very... I think that was classy. Yeah, I would give it away. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I would, too. I guess it was for that. Holding me to it.

Yeah. Good. I hope so. It's nice to start the new year fresh. That's what I'm trying to do. You know? I'm going to clean out the PMT studio. Why don't you focus on the pile first?

Why can't I do both? I think you'll get overwhelmed. Oh, man, I probably am. I'm already thinking maybe I shouldn't do it this weekend. Huh. Yeah. All right, Jerry, let's go. Why don't you just hire somebody?

I don't understand why you don't hire somebody. Oh, I want to do it myself because there's stuff that I probably want. Yeah, have you ever come across all the times you've done it, something that you're like, holy shit, I had no idea. So that I probably want. Yeah. Have you ever come across all the times you've done it something that you're like, holy shit, I had no idea. So that's the problem. Yeah. Every time I clean it, I come across a lot of stuff that I'm like, holy shit, I want

to keep it. But it distracts you from. And that becomes the new building blocks for the pile. Yeah. So now the pile, the majority of the pile is stuff that I've actually gone through and been like, oh my God, I want to keep it. So now how am I going to go through it and be like, I got to make some tough decisions. Yep.

I got to make some hard choices. Jerry doesn't believe in me. That's fine. I just, I just. You've been doubting me all my life. Every time I come in, it's just. I know. It's become.

It sucks, man. I agree. It's become a problem. It's become a hard place to work. Yeah. PFT too. Oh, PFT doesn't get, like I get a lot of the heat.

PFT doesn't even have a chair. No, he sits on a cooler. Sits on a cooler. And half the time he can't even sit on the cooler and so it kind of hovers around his desk and I'm like, do you?

I just need like a big closet that I can just start throwing shit in. You should just start keeping your shit up here, up front. Yeah. This area. Hang it all up. Yeah shit up here, up front. Yeah. This area.

Hang it all up. Yeah. It would just take it. Yeah. Like that rack shouldn't be there. The suit rack? No. Why? It should be something that's hanging. Okay, well, can you come in on Saturday and help me? I would come in to help you, yeah. You gonna maybe hang some, get

some hangers hanged? Yeah. I wanna get one of those things that baseball pro shops have, like the moving jersey. Yeah, all right. It's so cool. We'll look at the whole thing. Or you could do it

on Sunday morning, too, before the games. You don't have to come in Saturday. We'll look at the whole thing. We'll plan it out where we're going to put the suits and stuff.

All right. Order a couple things on Amazon. Yeah, I'll order whatever we need, yeah. I wish, too, we had a designated... You could walk in and see all... There's so many costumes here, and every now and then I want to do a need. Yeah. I wish, too, we had like a designated, you could walk in and see all.

There's so many costumes here. And every now and then I want to do a dumb bit. I'm like, I got to go out and get like a costume for something. But I'm like, I know we have it here. Always. But I know I'd never be able to find it. There's like 10 million costumes here, but you can't tell what the fuck is what or where it is. We should have a costume room.

Yeah. I need that. Hmm. Cat, if you don't clean off the pile, We should have a costume room. Yeah. I need that. Hmm. Hey, Kat, if you don't clean off the pile, you should have to sleep on it. Might be comfy. And give him $1,000. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hope there's no mice in it. Oh, there for sure. I've heard some things. Yeah. Really? By our desk? Yeah, sometimes I'll just kick it. I'll hear something, I'll kick it, and it'll stop.

Really? I found some fresh pelt the other day. Yep, I just. Where? Yeah, sometimes I'll just kick it. I'll hear something, I'll kick it, and it'll stop. Really? I found some fresh pelt the other day. Yep, I just... Where? Yep, last week. I was looking for my cabinet. My cabinet's just gone under my desk, the little metal drawer. Yeah.

Mine's gone. Shit! I looked down, and then where it was, there was a little... There was a fresh, warm pelt. I don't think the mouse took it, but it was under there when it was taken. Did Frank just kill a mouse? That was the most graphic thing I've ever seen. In the sliding door, right?

He was still alive, and he bludgeoned it. It was blunt force trauma. All right, let's play it, Jerry. Let's win it. Want to go again? Yeah, you've got to win. You've got to get fast money once. Until you win. It did say fast money, though, on the bottom.. Let's win it. You want to go again? Yeah, you got to win. You got to get fast money once. Until you win.

It did say fast money, though, on the bottom. You didn't make it to fast money. You have to beat the guy to go to fast money. Okay, gotcha. This is an all play. We're getting there. Yeah. All right, let's do this.

All right, here we go. In the football bowl game. Cotton ball. What about super? Yeah, that'll be there. Super, super, super. Rose. We got Rose. Rose, yeah.

Do you want our help or no? Yeah, we want to win. Yeah, we got to win. Sugar? Is that a sugar one? Peach is one. Peach, yeah. Do you want our help or no? Yeah, we want to win. Yeah, we got to win. Sugar? Is that a sugar one? Peach is one. Peach, yeah. Orange.

Orange is probably better. Oh. I think orange might be the last one. Clean sleep, clean sleep. Yeah! Perfect round. You're back, you're back. See you, dumb bitch.

Oh, wow, she got 12. Smoked her. Smoked her. Oh, man. Oh wow she got 12 Smoked her Name a sport whose fans attack the athletes Soccer Yes Oh Fans attack the athletes Yeah wait what

Basketball Malice at the Palace? I guess. I guess just name all the top sports, because it's got to be those. Do hockey fans have to... Yeah, there we go, Malice at the Palace. Football? Football, baseball? Yeah, just throw them out there.

Okay. This is weird. This is a weird question. Just name a sport. Yeah, hockey. Just throw hockey out there. Another clean sweep. Oh, we're going for the perfect game. We're going for the perfect game, Jer. Hockey might be the hardest one to infiltrate. We've never had a perfect game.

This might be it. I feel good about this. In a good way, name something about your wife that reminds you of your mother. Hooking. Yeah. Hooking. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Patience. Oh, okay. I like that. Loyalty. Loyalty. I like that. I like that a lot. Beauty.

Beauty. Beauty. Beauty. Beauty. Beauty. That's a good one. Beauty. Oh.

What? What could the answers be? Her breasts. Hard worker. Her cleaning. Her cleaning. What the fuck year did they write this? What the fuck? That was just cleaning.

How she stays in the kitchen barefoot and pregnant. I love you, babe. You clean just like my mom. Oh, my God. That was wild. I want to leave her, but she cleans just like my mom. All right. Here we you, babe. You clean just like my mom. Oh, my God. That was wild. I want to leave her, but she cleans just like my mom. All right, here we go, Jer. All right.

Besides photographs, name something specific that gets framed. Jersey. Oh, nice. Name an appetizer you might find served at a bar. Appetizer. Come on, Jer. You got to go fast. Nachos. Nachos Nachos

Oh no Name something at a hospital in Beverly Hills That might be made out of gold Toilet Wheelchair Hurry up Name a part of their body where men start to grow hair About the same time they start losing in their heads.

Back. Back, back, back, back. Come on. One more, one more. Name something that's good when it's dry. Dick. Dick. Dick.

I panic. Wait, Zod, did you type lifeguard? That's really good. Oh, no. Jersey, no. Zero. Nachos, ten. We're fucked.

Peanuts. Who the fuck? Oh, my God. It's going to be nose. Who's eating peanuts as an appetizer? Ears. nachos 10 we're fucked peanuts who the fuck oh my god I was eating peanuts as an appetizer ears that's bad wow

food oh oh boy that was a bad fast I felt pretty good about that actually it's a dick it's a dick

you panicked it's my dick I would be concerned if my dick was always wet yeah real true like the nose of a dog it's always like cold and wet

he's happy means he likes you everyone's always booping it see everyone tomorrow thanks for coming Jer have like a circle It's the act. It's the act. It's the act.

It's time to talk shop We're doing Yankees love It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

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It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

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It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act Happy birthday, Quigs. Happy birthday, Quigs. It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act