The Yak - Nick Attempts The Hot Chip Challenge | The Yak 6-27-22

Episode Date: June 27, 2022

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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Ho-ho! Welcome in. Hello, boys. Week after Barstool Idol. Oh, welcome in. Hello, boys. Week after Barstool Idol. Not a lot of energy in here. Yeah, it's like a normal week. Yeah, we have a lot of stuff planned today.

I know, we always have shit. We always have some shit up our fucking ass. Always have shit. Yeah, we have a lot of stuff planned today. Before we do that, though, just want to say thank you again to Owen, KB, and myself for being great allies, being at Pride yesterday. I was helping a friend move, and if you look on Pat's desk, got him a card. For Pat?

What was your excuse? Watch the whole parade from my window. Oh, okay. Roan, your excuse? I am staunchly against gay people. Okay. All right. That's fair.

I do not approve of the lifestyle choices. I got Pat a card, not Joey. Joey's too gay. Yeah. It was very funny because it was... The fashionably late was proven to 10x because we showed up at the office at 1 o'clock like we were told to.

Our float didn't start moving to like 445. Yeah. It was a lot of just sitting around. Not a lot of moving. Awesome time, though. It was. Everyone accepted us fully. Yeah. Yeah. It was a lot of just sitting around. Not a lot of moving. Awesome time, though. It was. Everyone accepted us fully. Yes.

That's surprising. Everyone was pumped. They were very pumped. They weren't trying to gatekeep gay. They weren't gatekeeping gay. I texted Nick and KB, and I was like, I'll know you guys are coming down the street when I hear the roar of booze coming down. I think it was a positive experience.

Was Tommy the gayest on the float? Yeah. Well, people were pointing out Tommy just, like, all of us were wearing tie-dye or some kind of variation. Tommy just wore a Fantasia shirt. He doesn't understand. He's very homophobic. He's being like, oh, the gays love this. The American Idol or the movie?

Movie. Oh. Tommy's mannerisms, his gait, his posture is gay enough. Yeah. The way he moves, the way he carries himself. There was also some just incredible shirts that I saw yesterday. I saw some guy just walking down the street that just said, why don't you sit on this cock?

I was like, fuck yes, dude. I would be in my bed and I would hear a roar of people going crazy. And I kept on looking out the window thinking it was going to be a celebrity or some shit. And it would just be some jackeded dude in like a thong. Yes. Running down community. Yes. It sounded like a really fun time.

It was very fun. Oh, there he is. Stephen Che. So first of. Oh, going on now? Yeah. I forgot about this. It's been 10 days.

1.85. He said he could do it. We need this from Steve. Can you guys hear us? Are Nick and I on? You are. You are. It's just a little wonky, but you're good.

It's wonky. It's a little wonked out, but you're fucking straight. Wonked out. There was a dude selling Eat Pussy. It's organic t-shirts. I couldn't tell if those were pro or anti. Those are for lesbians. LGB.

Probably, right? I don't know. those were pro or anti. Those are for lesbians. LGB. I don't know. It was pretty hood blocked. I also saw a lot of weed flags with a stripe of the rainbow and then a stripe of weed shit. Are the gays stoners? No. I don't know what those were. Half of it was camouflage and then there was a little strand of rainbow.

A new half is actually the transgender communities, the people of color. There's his badass. Yes. All right. So here comes Jay. He's going to try to do 185 once. I believe. I don't.

I would be shocked if he can't. He's too smiley. Just like his whole plan made no sense. I don't know how much he failed by last time. He very much failed. Oh. Come on, Jake. Push.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

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Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. just get played, though? Yeah, maybe. Yeah, because he could have died last week, too. He's looking fat for being on Tom Brady's diet. Really fat? He's not fat, but he's looking fat for being on that diet. Is that what Tom Brady looks like?

Yeah, I don't know. Oh, there he is. Yes. Okay. Yeah. Shit. That boy needs cool sculpting. If I were like me, I wouldn't give up entire food groups to look like that.

No. Somebody get this man a nightshade. needs cool sculpting. I like me. I wouldn't give up entire food groups to look like that. No. Che, you're going to get this man a nightshade. Che, you're looking kind of fat for being on Tom Brady's diet. First of all,

congrats, Che. That was awesome. Congrats for still being eight times weaker than me. Whatever. I did what I said I was going to do. You did it easily. Also, I am on Tom Brady's diet, TB12. I did what I said I was going to do. You did it easily.

Also, I am on Tom Brady's diet, TB12. I have not been doing cardio, but I just changed out this weekend. Four days in a row. Whoa. You got that with ease. You probably could have got another one up. Definitely not. Yeah, no.

Absolutely not. I did what I said I was going to do. Yeah. You did. You put your mind to it and you did it. Strongest muscle right here. No shirt on it. Did you bring another shirt? So you were prepped. You were prepped to it and you did it. Strongest muscle right here. No shirt on it. Did you bring another shirt?

So you were prepped. You were prepped to get this. I had this in my backpack. I was very pumped up. PFT also slapped the fuck out of my back. I don't know if you guys saw that. Rudy Giuliani style. Oh, yeah.

I saw that. Did you see that? Yeah. Did you see that clip, TJ? Him swinging the golf club picture is the funniest thing. This Rudy Giuliani story was so funny. There was a story that was released, I think it was Sunday morning, that Rudy Giuliani was like, I was assaulted at a Staten Island grocery store.

Some guy called me a scumbag. He hit me and almost knocked me over. I could have cracked my skull. If I wasn't in such good shape. He was campaigning for his son, right? Yeah, and he was like, I was assaulted by a man out of nowhere and then they pulled the grocery store footage.

See if, yeah, here it is. This is the assault. If you have children, don't watch. Oh! Oh. Did you see how she soothed him

right away? Play that again. Again, if you have children. That was like a playful. But she also hits him like just as hard. Here it is. Here comes the assault.

Almost knocked him over. There's like pictures of him after the fact with groups of police around him. The black brace. The neck brace in a wheelchair. Whoa. The cup of hot coffee. I need to see his face. That's violence.

That's violence, folks. Holy fuck. She touched him fully. The adrenaline was pumping for a couple hours. He probably didn't feel it for a while. Yeah, he's like, oh, man. He's like, I'm getting shot. I would have killed that guy.

It's like that clip of the lady in court who gets hit with a manila envelope and then goes down like she got shot, fucking screaming. It's incredible. You see his face when they said, yeah, we have the security footage. Yeah. Oh, no. I want to check that. Okay.

I always forget just getting a whole water gate to protect the security footage to delete the security footage i have a question why is security footage still so grainy and unclear like why don't we have the technology to make it crystal clear why are we watching that in 4k oh yeah that oh down down goes Frazier. She's like screaming. Oh. This shit is incredible. Oh. She did smack her.

She did give her a good whack. Jerry, come on. Sit down. What's up, Jersey? What's up, Jersey? Yo, yo. What's up, Jersey? Kate is out today. She's got to do CBT. Come sit down. Sit down. Take a seat. I'm handsome, sit down. What's up, Jersey? What's up, Jersey? Yo, yo. What's up, Jersey? Kate is out today.

She's got to do CBT. Come sit down. Sit down. Take a seat. I'm handsome. Sit down. It's been a while. You got a mohawk right now, boss?

I'm growing out my mullet again. Oh. Let me see it. Well, it's not grown yet, but you see how I'm fading it to work? Oh, yeah. That's dope. I'm prepping for a rat tail myself. Yep.

Nice. I'm Clay Bede. Hopefully by football season I feel really bad about this one The punishment wheel has been perfectly fair to all of us That's a 2021 Wow that was one of the hottest years for Chip And they get hotter with age

I've ate one of those before It sucks I think it's on my Instagram Did you have to go to the store? No, Amazon. He ordered it. Yeah. You ever pass that down to Nick?

Oh, you're doing it? Yeah. How was it? Milk or no? I don't have milk. Oh. It was pretty intense. Yeah.

Well, it takes like 20 seconds. Then you feel it bad. Have you done the gum for a while, too? Yeah. Like, yeah, like six hours, seven hours? Yeah. I'm sorry, Nick. Yeah, this sucks so bad for Nick

because there's like no way with some of the challenges you can kind of mind over matter it and it won't be so bad. Like, there's no way. This is a physical assault on your body. And I'm going to be out of commission for the rest of the day.

Inside and out, you're truly fucked. What are we putting on the wheel, Nick, in replace? It's your decision. Permission to go crazy, granted. Go brazy. You can go brazy. What is brazy? Two hardships.

I think it's just a crip way of saying. Crazy? A blood way of saying. Blood way. Blood so that you don't want to say. Punishment. Punishment. I think that we should add a 24-hour fast to the wheel, just not even as a punishment.

But I just like that show when we fasted. I thought that that was cool. Ooh, that would be a good punishment. A 48-hour fast? 48-hour fast. I think someone would have to do that. Are you cutting right now? No, I should. I think someone would have to do that. You aren't cutting right now? No, I should.

You look cut. You were looking slim yesterday. Yeah, I was. That was the gay in you. Yeah, probably. I got a pump in. Yeah. More ways than one.

Pat was looking fucking jacked. He was so jacked. When the hell did that happen? You looked awesome. That's been okay jacked. Pat and Rowan are running the same regimen. Yeah, we're workout buddies can we crowdsource some punishments what would you guys not want to do

like a lot of paperwork fasting for two days would be very funny if it was me Brandon or Sass how do we hold each other we wouldn't last time we didn't what about a show wide fast though it's just a slice on the wheel like that.

Outside of punishment. We wouldn't do it. Yeah, put that down. Show-wide fast on the wheel. If you eat enough on weekends, you don't have to eat Tuesday to Thursday. That's what I mean. I think it's kind of good to fast. I don't know.

You've got to do your supplements, though. Is there a Barstool fan out there that can give one of us a cast? Ooh. I would love you to wear a cast for the week. Have a cast for a week? Yeah. Oh, man, that's good. I there that can give one of us a cast. Ooh. I would love if you had to wear a cast for the week. I haven't had a cast for a week? Yeah. Oh, man, that's good. I think we can buy one.

I would love that. Like paper machine, like the real cast. Yes. All right, so that's a great punishment. I would love if you had to wear a cast. So on Monday morning, you have to get casted off, up, and then on Friday, you can take it off. You get cast away.

Okay, I love it. That's a great, great call. That's awesome. And you also have to answer to be like, what's wrong? It's like, I love it. That's a great, great call. That's awesome. And you also have to answer to be like, what's wrong? It's like, nothing. Nothing. Fuck that. Yeah, you're going to lose a lot of muscle.

Okay. You're going to lose a lot of muscle. Great. But just like getting it signed. Yeah. And then another wheel for how long the cast has to be on. Let's get started. Like a year.

Yeah, fuck this. If somebody could reach out who can apply a cast? An old school one, not these air casts. No, we want the muscle to atrophy underneath this. We want to put on... Weak, it won't atrophy. Can you put on that we all have to fast, show-wide fast? That's also on the wheel now. Can we pick the body part?

Are we fast? What body part would you want? Leg? My quads, because they're already non-existent. Oh, damn. Don't say that, KB. They're nice. I don't know if they do just a quad cast.

I'd rather give up the ability to walk than the ability to work out. KB, I was... I have an excuse. I thought you were implying you had the power to fast particular parts of your body. KB, I was... Which parts do you want me to fast? I was watching Barstool vs. America last night. You were fucking jacked, dude.

You're no Pat, but you're getting there. Yeah, I found weight rooms in each city. I watched that with my girl. Gary, could you fast for 24 hours? No, I can't fast for one or two. Waking up in the middle of the night. You can barely say that without eating. That is true.

Get hungry mid-sentence. I'm a snacker, man. You did say that the first time we ever talked. Yeah. First stream you ever came to, you're like, will there be snacks there? And I was like, what do you mean? He's like, well, I just love to snack. Yeah.

Dude, I think that you could easily do it. If you're fucking going sober, what is that but fasting? Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I'm so used to it. I eat so late in the middle of the night, 1, 2 in the morning. But you could just pound water. I think you would hit a wall, and then you would break through the wall, and your brain would be seeing the signs.

It's harder than drugs. Yeah, but it manipulates your food intake. For sure. People do the 30-day fasts, and I think they see Jesus. I tried one of those juice ones one time, but- The worst. Horrible. I would never recommend that.

Those are also proven to just not work. I tried one, and 24 hours in, I just started cooking sausages, because I was like, this is bullshit. You end up eating way more. Went straight to sausages. Spite sausages. I was just like, this sucks so much, because you Because you just tell yourself Oh I'm going to lose All this weight on this

On this juice cleanse I'm not even going to be hungry You drink it for one day And you have just Violent diarrhea And you're starving That's terrible Do you try a

Yeah that should never be A thing Do you eat hot dogs a day I was doing I was doing a pack of hot dogs Like yeah I was doing like A couple packs a week

For a while back there KFC radio Old school KFC radio They had to Have an intervention I was like a couple packs a week for a while back there. KFC Radio. Old school KFC Radio. They had to have an intervention. I was like, yeah, I'm on keto. I'm just eating hot dogs. I had probably shaved at least five years off your life. You should only have eight hot dogs a year.

Yeah. They say hot dogs are worse for you than cigarettes. You should have 40 lifetime. It was summer 2014 because I was making hot dogs for Mello. I would just, every lunch and dinner, I'd have like four hot dogs. Were you on drugs in 2014, Jerry? No bun. Yeah, I was.

Whose body had a worse year, you think? You or Big Cat with the hot dogs? Did you hear about how many hot dogs I ate? Well, there's a lot of wrestlers that swear by the carnivore diet. They only eat meat. Yeah, but that's them. They're eating healthy meat. Yeah, but that's them. They're eating healthy meat. Yeah, they're eating steak and shit.

We've also seen Jerry eat a lot of hot dogs, so he was probably doing the drugs and the hot dogs. Yeah, that's true. You're Jerry-dogging? You Jerry-dogging? No, I didn't even eat. Crack doesn't make you eat. You can't eat on crack.

How long did you fast for? The longest, I had a run where I was on the street for like two weeks, and I don't remember eating, and then I had a run where I was on the street for like two weeks, and I don't remember eating, and then I checked myself into a psych ward, and then when I went to give the urine, my urine was more orange than a Gatorade. Jesus Christ. More orange than a Gatorade? Orange Gatorade, yeah.

Yeah, what flavor? No, it was flavor, yeah. Orange and a Riptide Rush. Yeah, because you don't like to, you don't,. When you do crack, you don't really like to eat or drink. You can't physically get it down or you just forget to even think about it. No, not that you forget. You don't crave anything.

You don't crave water. Except more. Except more and more crack. That's crazy. Alright, Nick. I'm not good with hot foods. At all. This isn't that hot. Did they change the recipe or anything? Yeah, that's... This is 2021, so it's vintage.

Vintage recipe. I did this one on Tommy Walker. Oh, yeah, TJ did this one on Tommy Walker. I took a piece. Is it usually that color? Yeah. Yeah, that doesn't look that bad. No, that looks good.

No, it's a dark... It's a black bean chip. Oh, okay. Limit how much you touch his little tongue. He said limit how much you touch it, Nick. Limit how much your zingers... I feel like the sound is really low. It is. black bean chip. Oh, okay. Limit how much you touch it. He's trying to get his little tongue. He said limit how much you touch it, Nick. Limit how much your fingers. I feel like the sound is really low. It is.

That is low. Stanko? I could have somebody come in there. It's probably because somebody backed into the thing. Nick, you're dumbass. Stanko, beat the fuck out of Nick, please. He is. He's about to.

Don't touch it too much. Boys, I'm really worried that I'm going to lose my voice for the case race. This man's about to eat a hot chip. I know. I wanted to get that out there. I knew someone was going to say that. Your moment was just stolen. I was trying to stall. I was worried about the potential of losing it. I was stalling for

my boy. Don't eat your hot chip in peace. We've got to worry about Sass's voice maybe being lost. It's already halfway there. So you can just stop talking. It's true. Hydrate up too. Go to sleep early. I didn't talk once yesterday.

And that's what it sounds like? Mm-hmm. Damn, dude. Were your teeth just chattering, Nick? Practicing biting without tongue. Possible. Do it again. Possible.

We got to tape your tongue down. See if we can get some tape across your top of your mouth Nick I had some of those jalapeno lays earlier yeah man they're really hot how are you bro I just had a spicy margarita

am I just doing it right now you need to I mean are you doing anything to cut it? I think even maybe that booze might cut it. Or it might just like. No. That's a bad idea. Can you grab me like a high dude maybe?

Oh, the devil springs maybe. I don't know. That's what I was talking about, the devil springs. Why do you think that might cut it? The devil springs might, yeah, cut it. It might just wash it over. It might make it really work. Imagine that and you grab the devil springs and the chip in your body armor.

Devil springs would be a decent move. By the way, we just hit 90K subscribers. We got to pump it up. Keep subscribing. Case Race coming Thursday. Case Race is going to get a million views unless it sucks. Yeah. Which.

And. Yeah. I'm so pumped. No, I'm saying it's going to be awesome. Yeah. Case Race is going to be. The fact we have Will Compton and Shane Gillis, an all-time beer drinker and an all-time vibes guy.

You know what I was thinking about was Will, he's going to have to give up his bid if he wants a chance at winning. What do you mean? I've never seen him drink a fast beer. He's only a slow beer guy. But what if he's just slow and steady? Yeah, what if slow and steady wins the race? No, it took two and a half.

Shane's going to win. What do we do for the next one? A hundred percent. You slow and steady? Yeah, what if slow and steady wins the race? No, it took two and a half. What did we do for the next 100%? We just vibed. We watched that wrestling thing. I felt so bad watching that again. Yeah, no, we got to think of something we can do after the case race. That would be funny. PowerPoint presentations would be funny. PowerPoints we Oh, yeah.

PowerPoints. We got to do. Someone has a talking stick. And I was thinking maybe if we brought in the VR. Oh, yeah. Maybe did like the bar fight virtual reality. Oh, yeah. Yes.

Oh, we got it. We set that up. We're just bar fighting. I get to control. OK. The only thing is that TJ is gonna be drunk too True Good point How are we splitting up the teams

I think we We can wheel it No Zah by the way Should we wheel Zah Zah's gone all week doing Classics No Zah what the fuck Classics

No Zah no Brandon Should we just get producers So you guys can get fucked up Yeah that's One of the control room guys Will be here Yeah

Okay That was yeah That's just tough. So how many people is it? No, Brandon's going to be out. Tommy Walker's going to be in for the opening ceremonies. Brandon and Tommy are going to... Can you seat the chip?

Yeah, yeah, let's do it. Let's do it. Oh, Nicky. That's okay. You can let that go. Oh, you're good. You're good. You're good.

That wasn't that bad. No, it's... Grab him a dude wipe so he can wipe his hands off. Oh, dude wipes to wipe his hands? There's some right behind him. Oh. Grab those. He can get that.

Yeah, you got that. You okay? My back tested. You okay? Now it's going to hit him. Yeah, here it is. Now? Yeah, like 20, 30 seconds.

Has anyone else done it? Yes. I've done it. I've done it. It sucks. We all did it. Yeah, it was terrible. I just burped for like four hours straight.

And I was on the toilet or within 20 minutes. The hiccups. Yep. Yeah, the hiccups and then you burp. And like it comes right out of you. Oh, no. Oh, no. Look at how he's changing colors.

He went real dark red, now real light white. And then he's getting the Brandon blotches that Brandon you. Oh, no. Oh, no. Look at how he's changing colors. He went real dark red, now real light white, and then he's getting the Brandon blotches that Brandon gets. Oh, no. Oh, fuck. Yeah, his face and shirt's

quickly becoming a Christmas palette. Yeah, it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You okay? Oh. Fuck, we missed that. Oh, no.

Oh, no. Water's not gonna help. Oh, no. All right. Be careful with your hands. Wipe your hands down. Do not get your hands in your eyes. Fuck we missed Oh no Oh no Water's not gonna help Oh no Alright Be careful with your hands Wipe your hands down Do not get your hands in your eyes That'd be bad

Wipe them again You want some of the booze? The booze? You want some of this devil springs? I once did a hot wing challenge From Quaker State and Whatever

And I ate like six of them and I shit jet black for like four days straight. Isn't that crazy how that happens? What is going on in the body that is bringing full on dirt soil out of you? There's a soil cut as well.

Where are you at? One to ten. Alright, that was an eleven. Oh no. It's making me hurt. Keeping his... Oh, no. Oh, no. It's making me hurt. It's making my heart hurt. Oh, no. I don't enjoy it.

It's just sad. Yeah, no. It's just sad. That thing's funny. My boy is sepia right now. You know what? You don't have to do it, Nick. You can throw it up.

Yeah, yeah. You can stop. All right, this bit is going on too long. You can stop whatever you want to. Stop being in pain. Stop being so wacky, bro. This is a good fit. It's a weird brain bastard.

Yeah, just have it on the record that we all showed sympathy and said you could stop. You could stop. I hate, I don't like it. You took the gag one, right? I should have given you a gag. I feel like Jay when he got his wedgie. Sneak diss. Listen.

Jay should have to get another wedgie look how white he is god damn there's Billy Mitchell walking Billy Mitchell he's full of quarters we had him on PMT just a minute ago it was electric he's the ultimate alpha an alpha's alpha

yeah I played Donkey Kong for like three years straight after that like yeah to get like past the i mean i got maybe seven levels into it it was so fucking hard they just had it at a bar i love going to stowe's in philly it's one of the best documentaries ever yeah actually maybe the best one that like man on the wire there's only a couple that are i think. It could be the best. Most rewatchable documentary, period. Super size me.

What happened with Morgan Spurlock? Because Billy Mitchell did keep on saying that Morgan Spurlock. Cancellation. Nick has a lot of opinions on Morgan Spurlock. Because Terram, Nick. I don't know if you know it. Why are you holding back? Switch subjects. I heard a lot of things.

Billy Mitchell just kept on saying how great Morgan Spurlock is. Oh, he's a... Yeah. We were just like, oh, okay. He didn't leave the game, the arcade setup. Yeah. He just faced it the whole time, even though it wasn't working. Yeah.

He's like, all right, we're not going to talk to you, Billy. Yeah. Is that what he's here for? Is he here for the arcade thing? Yeah I'm going to beat his ass I don't think you are Nope

He's seen a million of you in his day I'm pretty confident in my ability He's seen a million of you He's the one dude I don't think they like Okay well I'm second then You're chain right now You're like oh I can run as fast as the athletes

He's so good He told the story that chain on he's got uh he's got the belt he won the australian king of kong uh championship in 2019 in the final four he's so good who do you play in the final four his son that's how good he is what's the why are we doing that is what's the point of doing it? The only one who could possibly beat me is my own sperm. There's a guy, Steve Wiebe, who did beat him for a little bit. Steve Wiebe had it in his garage. He was the ultimate feel-good.

I feel like he shouldn't be in the competition. Watch the documentary. Watch the documentary. It'll change everything. Seriously, one of the best. I'll check it out. Yeah. You like watching film?

I do. Hot chip cam. Nick, he's now pale. Why is your head shrinking back? Where's your neck going? Oh, no. His neck's going back into his body. He's turtling.

How are you doing, Nick? A little better? Oh, no. I think the water's making it worse. Can't help. Probably. Just spreading it. You needed another hot chip to cool down the hot chip.

Yeah, you need to counteract it with more hot chip. I like how you pronounce that. Chip. Hot chip. Hot chip. Mix using dude wipes to get his hands clean. You can use dude wipes to get your butt clean. Dude wipes are extra large flushable wipes made with plant-based source fibers

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You'll be wondering. You're walking around with a dirty butt if you're not using dude wipes, period. It's not just during the process. It'll feel so much better afterwards. You know how you use toilet paper. It'll pulsate for hours afterwards. Your ass will be pulsing. With the wipes.

I can vouch firsthand. I had stress-induced diarrhea last week because of Idol. Used Dude Wipes. Worked every day. You need some milk. Nick without his... You need some milk. Get him some milk.

Dude Wipes got the bidets, too. Yes, yes. They sent me one. It's a good price. It's a fair price on a good bidet. $100. Incredible. For the case race. It's a good price. It's a fair price on a good bidet. $100. Incredible. For the case race, are we doing face paint again?

Yeah. We got the same person coming in? I thought we were going to do a masquerade and no one knows who's who. I'm going to someone else. Okay. So we should decide the teams tomorrow. We should decide the teams tomorrow. Decide them right now?

No, let's decide them tomorrow. We have a lot planned today. We're doing the Mike Trout fantasy order in a minute. We should decide the teams tomorrow. That way the teams can work on their PowerPoints. It would be interesting to have everybody's face. If we did all Jokers and one clown, I just feel like that would be memeable for the entire world.

That's what I wanted to do last time, and then me and Owen did it, and then everyone else decided against it after me and Owen had already gotten the Joker. You know how there's the meme of classic Owen stealing out Sass's... I want you to do Jimmy Kimmel's Karl Malone. Yeah, that would be funny as fuck. Yeah, that would be really funny. That would be sick.

He's like, no, I'm Jimmy Kimmel. Go to that. Yeah, Halloween 14. Justin Trudeau. He's amazing. He's a fucking goat, too. I've got some... I already got some stuff planned. What? I got the shit? Yeah, guys. He's amazing. He's a fucking goat, too. I've got some... I already got some stuff planned.

What? I got the shit? Yeah, yeah. Within 20 minutes. I think you should and just kind of camp out for a little bit. Yeah, take your time.

Because if you don't empty yourself, you'll be back. Yeah. It's gonna burn. Oh, buddy, it's gonna burn. You should pre-dude wipe with the menthol ones

and kind of get some cooling on there. I feel bad, Nick. Not bad enough to do it myself. I don't know. Just bad. Should we spin the wheel? Yeah, let's spin the wheel because we have a fantasy draft.

Good news, you're cute in pain. I think Dave is coming on the yak. Today? Yeah. Twice in a month? On standby. All right, let's spin our wheel. Where is he?

Is he here? Oh, there he is. Okay. Okay. spin our wheel. Where is he? Is he here? Oh, there he is. Okay. Okay. That was great. Steve?

That was nice. We should get a 24-hour slow, too, where time slows down, where we get a Mr. Freeze.

I enjoyed that a lot. Kind of humanized him. He's just like us. People are saying you need to drink milk and eat bread. Everyone enjoyed that a lot. Kind of humanized him. He's just like us. People are saying you need to drink milk and eat bread.

Everyone says that. I have to take my shirt off for a video. I'm not doing any carbs. Milk's too fatty. Spin it. I hope it's not double Ritz today. Uh-oh, Dave. You'll reset.

Come on. Oh, no. All right. Okay. I got some primo Jack Herrera at my desk. Should we... Got it from the dispensary in Chicago. It's going to be creative and uplifting. Should we see who's got a monster rip?

Do we want to save monster rip for tomorrow because we have nothing tomorrow? Or do you want to do it now? Right now. Okay, all right. Yeah, I'm craving a nothing episode. We can't show a monster rip on camera. I'd love a monster rip.

So we can do it before the show when somebody shows up after ripping tomorrow or somebody can just leave the room and do it today. Leave the room and do it. Leave the room and do it or rip it before the show when somebody shows up after ripping tomorrow or somebody can just leave the room and do it today. Leave the room and do it. Leave the room and do it or rip right before the show tomorrow. Or just rip back to the camera. I mean, I can't relapse. Nope. Nope, Jerry, you're out

of this wheel. And I think a lot of people will have the tolerance where it won't be even visibly. A monster rip? No, it's a monster. It's a monster, Kyle. Okay. It's a monster rip. He did A monster rip? No, it's a monster. It's a monster. I don't know, Kyle. It's a monster. He did the monster rip. Why don't we do it tomorrow? That way they can tweet it, the monster rip, right

before the show. We can tweet the monster rip, right? We better do it. We can't watch drug consumption live on air. We're doing a case race on Thursday. That's not a drug. You say it's tobacco, a drug Alcohol is definitely a drug

So Spin the wheel to see who has to do the monster rip tomorrow And it will be right before the show Monster fucking rip Monster rip And then that will be tomorrow's show Put Brandon on the wheel too We'll just make him take a monster rip

I just like to see his dumb ass high. What about Kate? He rules high. Kate, put Kate on the wheel. Yes. Don't put her Muslim baby on the wheel, TJ. Okay, I won't. Baby's high enough as it is.

I saw that baby at the parade. You know what? Let's do the fantasy draft, and then we can do the monster Rip wheel at the end of the show to see who has to do it tomorrow. And the rule is you have to do the Monster Rip ten minutes before the show starts. So you can't rip in the morning and hope.

I think it should be one minute before the show. One minute? All right, I love that. All right. And Roan will be the judge of the Monster Rip. That's fair. We have the, what is it called? The Hammer Bubbler was given to us. Hammer Bubbler? It's a handoff pipe. That's fair. We have the, what is it called? The hammer bubbler is given to us.

Hammer bubbler? That's what came. Okay. Yeah. All right. Tomorrow's the monster rip. The hammer. It retails like

180 at Illidolf. Now, here's another question. Would it be funnier if we do the monster rip wheel after and don't show the people

and someone shows up tomorrow monster ripped. But we don't say who. I think that would be funnier, would it not? Yeah. Mystery monster rip? Yeah, mystery monster rip. Yeah.

Uh-huh. Yeah, you can tweet out your monster rip after the show. Are you wiping your tongue with a dude wipe? Chat, sound off. Mystery monster rip, or you want to know who's monster ripping? I kind of like the idea of mystery monster rip. Yeah, let's just spin it after and play it by ear. I think some would be funnier mystery, some would be funnier.

Helen. How are you doing, Nick? They're saying we got to do it now. They just want everything that has to be instant with them. I don't understand why. I think tomorrow's show will be funnier. How are you doing, Nick? They're saying we got to do it now. They just want everything that has to be instant with them. I don't understand why. I think tomorrow's show will be funnier. We have nothing planned for tomorrow's show.

They don't enjoy us talking. There's so much planned today. All right, dude. I'll do it now. Let's do it now. Dave is on the Zoom. Let's see what's happening. All right, let's get Dave on.

We're doing a mystery monster rip. Saying it right now. All right, let We'll do a mystery monster rip tomorrow's show One of us will be mystery monster ripped Dave Dave He's listening to Julian Edelman's clip Dave listening to Julian Edelman's clip. Made the decision on Thursday. Now it's Sunday. I thought you could hear us.

I thought I watched it. You might have us muted. Dave. Oh, I was about to say. Week three, like, first quarter has the Buffalo Bills or the Jets, and here it's his non-throwing shoulder, his left shoulder. Dave. Can I hear everybody? Yeah.

We were just listening to Julian Edelman. No, I can't hear Dick. You can't? Ah, fuck. Nice job, Kamesh. Can you hear me? We can hear you. Yes, we can hear you.

I just hear like weird noises. We can hear you. Barm bar. That is a good Nick impression We can hear you. Barbar. That is a good Nick impression. We can hear you. All right. Check, check, check. Tech difficulties, dude.

Barstool difference. You know what the fucking drill is. I'm excited for the mystery monster rip. I'm excited to find out who's drafting first. I think it's going to be

Moustakis. Ooh. Like Moustakis. Wait, I only know Moustakis and Trout. Who else is it? Bieber? Bieber. Who else?

I have the list here. By the way, we have a packed week now. So we have Mystery Monster Rip tomorrow. We have KB's Wild Wednesday. But the thing is with KB's Wild is it can't involve alcohol. Correct. Because we're doing the case race. We're taping the case race Wednesday night that will air on Thursday.

I've also thrown out the idea, which I think people are somewhat receptive of, Thursday morning at 1030 we're going to tape Friday's show. So super hungover. I will be here. I'll make sure I'm here to tape that. So on Friday you can watch the aftermath of the case race. So it will line up chronologically. Like that, yeah.

Nick is translucently white right now. Very white. Pop that head up. Oh, my God. And then next week, we're off all week. Just so everyone knows, all the Yak listeners, the office is closed for the entire week. We're going to send you out with a bang. Let's get 100,000 by the end of the week.

Please. I think we'll have some stuff uploaded over the break, too. Oh, great. I think we're going to upload the Yak basketball in full. Quigs had said he had something, some Che compilations. Oh, hell yes. We'll have some stuff out next week. Great.

Let's get that Che compilation out. That's Necessary He gets to compile Che made it himself Have you guys ever watched the Yak highlights? It's just all Che And Che made it The one that we upload?

Yeah The Twitter? No the one from YouTube It was like Oh really? The Yak Che did you do something? I think Max mixed those, right?

I absolutely do not do that. Best of Che? Oh, that's a lot of Che. Is there ever too much Che? No. Who says he's a banana? The chat is going to go crazy at that question. Are there any bananas in the office?

Does the chat like me? I think the chat hates all of us, to be honest with you. Ebony's got a nanner at her desk. We have a very interesting relationship with the chat. Everyone. They just don't... They want us to just dance for them

at all times. I think we do a lot of things. They don't even like the show. They just want to see us suffer. Yeah. I told them to please, please stop texting me. It's making it a lot harder

for me to discern who are the people I actually know texting me. Because you're not going to save any numbers so it's kind of on them to make sure your life is organized I love the chat but I just understand we've lost control of the chat

like there's a difference you know what I mean they're the wildlings in Game of Thrones we've lost control of the chat there's just a different breed of humans that maybe we can harness for our power at some point I never wanted to control them

we should just start threatening people with the yak chat you want this? if you ever go live on YouTube we'll sick our chat on you big time like how Taylor Swift does it and shit they'll defend us outside of these walls inside of these walls and hate us.

Remember when we were switching from Sirius to YouTube, you led a conversation about not letting the chat control us. Yeah, no, they've controlled us. Now they're fully script writers for the show. Yeah, they are. I don't like this conversation because now they're pumped up. Oh, yeah. They're fired up right now.

It's an honest conversation that the chat owns us. I just checked in for one second and they're like, L, L, L, do the Monster Rip right now, L, L. But they're not controlling us in that respect because we're going to do it tomorrow, which will be way better for the show. Here we go. A bushel. I'm going to say Nick is out for the mystery monster rip

After today No no no I love weed You wanna rip I was trying to think of a joke I just said He's got nothing That's funny though

It's brain is mush It's funny to love weed Love weed It's a sweet brand Is Prez still on the line? Thought so There he is Can you hear us Dave? No love weed. Is this a sweet brand? Is Prez still on the line? I thought so. There he is. Can you hear us, Dave?

No. Dave! What do you think he's doing? He's listening to the Edelman clip. He's working, brother. He's dialed in. He's the opposite color as Nick. We could hear him.

Looks like he just ate a hot chip. People would pay thousands to watch this man work uh commissioner che is freaking right now i just caught eyes with him he is not happy you can't we can't hear you now why do you think so much has happened recently i forgot that ben this isn't the worst thing ever summer of mincey a lot of people don't know that Che is like a total dick to the guys in the booth. Che, this is... You're freaking. I can tell.

No, it's okay because... It's not okay. I mean, you're the commissioner and... So we're going to have maybe two guys in addition to Dave join. But like, it's also... A couple of them have off days right now. So a lot of them are with their families. So they're going to try and hop on. I said this is going to be like 10-ish minutes. of them have off days right now. It's a lot more with their families. They're going to try and hop on.

I said this is going to be like 10 ish minutes. We have just Dave on right now. So it could be worse. They could be like everyone's on. Yeah. But Dave's pretty bad to have on. Certainly. It is your fault. Can't fire you.

Nick. What? Tass, are you okay? Do you need to poop? I'm more worried about Sass than Nick. My empath boy. His voice might be gone. The voice thing.

Pooping for Nick. Who knows what will happen tomorrow? My voice could be gone. It could be. Because Nick is dying. Who calls a lost voice? Yeah. Before they have a single shade.

Stop it. You can't tell anything currently, but I could tell this is going to go. It's going to shot. Everyone, I lost my voice for like a month straight. That sucked. I almost, I actually made a. What was that? I don't remember that.

It was like two months ago. This was like a banana's heart is a rock. Why are you eating it from the side? It's the softest part. Yeah, it is. Steven Shay. How's it feel, Nick? Okay.

I don't want to ever do that again. Okay. Well, hopefully you won't. You can fucking say it. All right. No, I'm okay. All right.

Bring in the bonus chip. You thought that was hot. Back him up. That was a lime to Steve. A hint of lime. I was just about to say it.

You guys placeboed me. It's like eating an edible. The hot chip from trying to bring in the real chip. They're freaking

out there. Just hearing it makes me confident though. Just hearing them like Defcon 5 and back there. Wait, why is Zaw out of the case race? He's in...

Oh, we can't do Nick's Wild. KB's Wild. Oh, yeah, it's on Zaw. Yeah, we'll have to do that after. More prep time. Prepping that. Yeah, it is on Zaw. It'll be the first Monday back. It's a Zaw-based game, but is on Zah. It'll be the first Monday back.

It's a Zah-based game, but everybody partakes. Yeah, it's the first Monday back. I don't know what the context is of the clip, but when Zah is under the table in the Yak teaser, he's like, no, no, no. He's like, what is the context of that? I don't know. That was hilarious.

I want to think that he was peeing or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What we'll do is we'll do, because July 13th, that Wednesday, is the mini golf tournament. So we'll tape KB's Wild featuring Nick and Zah. I don't think that's on Monday. It's Monday after Monday's show, and we'll run it on the Wednesday. So that way we don't come back and have a day that we miss.

All right. You guys are all participating, right? Yeah. In the mini golf? Yeah. I don't know right. You guys are all participating, right? Yeah. In the mini-golf? Yeah. I don't know. I didn't sign the sheet, but I will. I did not.

But if we're all doing it, then yeah. I was going to do it. We're not doing the yak that day? I was saying we could pre-tape KB's Wild. Okay. Yeah. I would do the golf. I mean, it would be funny.

Yeah. The more, the merrier. Yeah. On that type of video. Yep. Okay, so Dave is definitely not mad. Mm-mm. No, he's actually in a good mood today.

Should ask for a raise. Yeah. Do it. This doesn't work. Honestly, I could do this offline. You always say to me he's more of a figurehead at this point anyway. Well, I'm just saying it's supposed to be an interactive, ideally

interactive group thing, but if it's just date... I mean, I feel like he's going to shit on me for my texting over the weekend, but outside of that... What did you do over the weekend? There was a little hubbub. I got it in order. I want to say, what's the little hubbub? Lead with the hubbub.

It's just what happens in every fantasy. I had the rules from last year, and I sent them, and I was like, all right, we're deciding draft order on Monday. So if anyone has any objections to these rules, we'll just run back the same settings from last year. And it's a classic argument you get into with friends. It's how much should a passing touchdown be worth in fantasy? Four or six points.

And there was some debate. And then someone got upset. And then Dave said, Che, take control. Seriously? Who is that? Oh, Bregman's going to. Oh, shit. All right.

Uh-oh. Dave, can you hear us? Yeah. How much time? I mean, he's making a mockery of this whole thing. He is. It's all Stephen Chase's fault. It's all Stephen Chase's fault. It's all Stephen Chase's fault.

All right, we got Alex Bregman. Bregman's here. What's up, Bregman? How you doing? And then Moustakis and Hosmer might join as well. Steve, like, I mean, we have schedules, my man. I know. I'm sorry.

I don't know what the issue was. It was an output issue on our end. We rebooted. Did you test it? I'm okay with it, but Bregman's probably going to schedule. You got other guys coming on, and you're just way off. You're making this a thousand times more complicated when you weren't commissioner.

Yeah, we're live. We're live. We're live right now, Bregman. We're live. You should have come into studio. You're in New York City, are you not? Yeah, good thing I know. I was about to talk some shit.

Yeah, no, we're live. Does everyone know that, Stephen, that we're live? No, no, no. Dan, Dan, he talks to these people like they know exactly everything about Barstool. He's like, we'll just jump on the yak, we'll do it. And everyone's like, all right, fine. they have no idea what he's talking about um dave while we have you here sass wanted to have a quick combo with you oh no i'm all set we can talk about another time his voice is starting to go are you guys in nyc right now? Yeah, we are. You're, like, probably across the street.

Are y'all at the headquarters? Yeah, we are. Right across from Madison Square Garden, yeah. Hey, Bregman, can I ask you a question? What's up? Like, I saw Jock Peterson has, like, 18 partners. Why? I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

They're trying to build up their squads in order to take down the beast but it's like the uh the four the four running back strategy last year but like just got people mind blown four running backs right away win the league is that wait who won it who won the league okay nice but but dan there's like i don't know like what jock peterson's last contract was but he like can't afford like the fee or something he's got like they split it that's awesome in fairness the fee was raised substantially what to three million not not that high yeah it was raised what we don't say what all right three million yeah but we we can get into it bregman was actually at the center of the uh the hubbub over the tax exchange with the

oh the uh wait so are we doing this because we have dave here so let's do it i don't know what we're doing he thinks we have all day so so let's do it. I don't know what we're doing. He thinks we have all day. So we're deciding the draft order. So you're just going to say a name, and then we'll spin the wheel? We'll say the name, and we'll spin a wheel, and then we'll remove that sliver. Okay. All right. All right, here we go.

Maybe a tidbit about each, Steve? So say the first name, and then we're going to spin it, and then that's the pick they get. We'll go bottom to top. So we'll go Dave Portnoy first. Dave Portnoy, your pick is we're going to spin the wheel and see what pick Dave gets. Founder go bottom to top, so we'll go Dave Portnoy first. Dave Portnoy, your pick is, we're going to spin the wheel and see what pick Dave gets. Founder of Barstool Sports. Founder of Barstool

Sports. Also, sneaky faster hands than most guys in this league. A hundred percent. You have the eighth pick, Dave. Is that a bad pick? If you're snaking, you get probably two pretty good guys. I like the bottom. One of the worst. Gotta right, who's up next?

Got to be one of the worst picks, in my opinion. We got Mike Napoli. Mike Napoli. Give us a tidbit, Che. He is, I guess, on the coaching staff? Managing staff? Yes, of the Cubs. Why did me and Bregman have to be on this?

I don't even know why. Just to waste our time? Just to see it, I guess. Two. Mike Napoli has picked two. We got Mike Trout. Mike Trout, give us a tidbit. He was on a video game cover.

Eagles fan. Eagles fan. Perfect, perfect. That's plenty. He hit a bunch of home runs recently. Okay. He's hit a lot of home runs. Video game cover.

All his career. All right, Mike Trout has of hole runs. He's got a video game covered. All his career. All right, Mike Trout has pick number six. Former commissioner as well. Former commissioner, yeah. Fired commissioner. We got Cole Calhoun. Cole Calhoun. Texas Rangers.

Yep, Texas Rangers, Cole Calhoun. Bregman, who were the top players last year? You obviously won it, but who were the... Cole Cowboys won! Wow! I took Jonathan Taylor and got Jamar Chase in the ninth round. Great pick. Great pick.

Ended up trading Chase and Burrow for Mahomes and A.J. Brown right before the end of the season. I had a bunch of running backs, honestly, that were studs. Love it. James Robinson. He ended up getting hurt. Dave, are you going to take Mack Jones? Well, I'm not going to tell you what I'm doing, but I love Mack Jones. With the eighth pick?

You're not playing with the fans of the world anymore. Now you've got, like, guys with, like, active working brains. Moustakis, like, texted me on the side, be like, heads up, a lot of meatheads in this league. All right, spin it. Next spin we have a Cleveland Guardians pair, Shane Bieber. Yep, not Justin. And Austin Hedges.

Austin Hedges and Shane Bieber combined. Okay. The Guardians, by the way, Stephen, not the Indians. Oh, sorry. Pick number seven. Good pick. Solid pick. Great pick.

All right. Disagree again. Next up. One, two, three, or last? We got Nick's guy, Jake Marisnyk. Jake Marisnyk. It's for pirates. All right.

Love it. Jake paid double last year. Oh, because he was last? He's last again. 12th pick for Jake Marisnyk. Yeah, I agree. 12th pick for Jake Marisnyk. Yeah, I agree. 12th pick is a good pick. They seem to be beating up on him quite a bit

for his performance as far as last year and projecting us to move forward. I think he came in last the last two years. Now, Dave, Stephen has told us that guys are just giving him a little guff. Is that an accurate representation of what's going on

the text chain i i actually think they don't really know how annoying in who steve che is quite yet so they don't know what to do with him because he's being too he's being himself which is annoying right right very annoying i think as the season progresses they're going to realize like who he is. I was brought in to do a job, and I'm doing that, I think, pretty well. Making some rule changes. Today hasn't gone seamlessly. Yeah, we had a technical issue.

There's no need. I get it, Yak, and get some content, but you only have me and Bregman. Bregman is just sitting in a bar. There was no need for us. We're doing nothing. We're adding nothing to this. He's just wasting our time. All right, let's keep going.

All right, then we got a very good one. Jack Peterson. Jack Peterson, okay. He's the lone remaining member of the Him and Tommy Fam exchange of this group. Yes, because the easier way to say it is Tommy Fam's not in this league anymore. Of the two parties? Yes. That was such a backwards way of explaining that. All right, Jack Peterson has picked 10 in his conglomerate.

Bregman, do you know who was added to the – who was his co-manager that just got added yesterday? Barnes, I think. Okay. From the Dodgers. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Austin Barnes.

Okay. Then we got Mike Moustakas, Cincinnati Reds. Hey, Bregman, quick, yeah. Austin Barnes. Okay. Then we got Mike Moustakas, Cincinnati Reds. Hey, Bregman, quick side question. Did you guys celebrate the team no-hitter like a no-hitter? Yeah. That was pretty fun. It's like, I mean, I don't know. It was pretty sick.

I mean, just a – That doesn't count? What did you say? A team no-hitter does not count. I mean, it doesn't count. Technically, it's like a straight-up no-hitter. But, I mean, it was – we were nasty. Yeah.

What about the next day? Was there a moment? Because the Yankees didn't have a hit until, like, the sixth inning the next day. Were you like, maybe the Yankees will just never get a hit again? No, we weren't like that. I would have been. I kind of – I was standing there. I kind of felt like it was going to happen again

Honestly I was like wow they might just As a team as an organization never get a hit again Which would have been cool I thought we played I thought we played Like really lights out baseball For like 35 or 37

Innings over the four games Unfortunately the other two Last couple innings over the four games. Unfortunately, the other two innings count. They do count. Alright, we'll roll for Mike. Mike Moustakas. This is probably the most active guy in the group chat.

Moose has got number three. That's a good pick, right KB? He's a great pick. Who's next, Steve? Eric Hosmer. Eric Hosmer. We have three guys from the Padres, the first guy. Okay.

Hosmer's got the 11th pick. Bad pickings for you, Bregman. Not great. Bregman, is there any pick that you actually want? Four, five, and nine left on the board. We got Manny Machado up next. What? Manny Machado in this league?

Yeah. All right. Give it a spin. Insane how casually he's saying it. Yeah. Steven knows nothing about Manny Machado. I don't. No, I know.

I said that as a fact. All right. So then the last two picks, five I know. I said that as a fact. It's the areas from San Bernardino. All right. So then the last two picks, five and six. Look at that. So we got Will Myers, one L. And then Alex is going to have whatever pick this doesn't land on. Okay. So it's six or five.

Okay. And you wrote this down? Yes. Okay. We should probably get them on for this. So Will Myers has pick six. Alex Bregman, you got pick five. Congratulations, man.

Any last words? Thank you for joining us. This has been great. Electric, Steve. Electric stops. Appreciate you guys having us, setting the Zoom call up. It's been, I mean, legit. Amazing. Great job,

Mish. Great job. We'll see you guys for the draft. We'll do the same thing for the draft. Send him a link to retweet. Oh, he's in a full set. Dave's texting right now. Probably texting for me being like this fucking Stephen Shea guy.

Great job, Steve. Thanks. I mean, that's kind of what that was going to guy. Great job, Steve. Thanks. I mean, that's kind of what that was going to be. Yeah, no, that was. I apologize for the technical difficulties. We broke news on the Yak. We just gave you the order. You want to read it off real quick?

Sure. Damn, that was fucking sick. That no-hitter was sick, too. Yeah, it was. Sweet, they took a guy out during a no-hitter? Well, yeah. I mean, he had like 100-plus pitches. I threw a combined no-hitter when I was a kid.

Really? The pitch counts, yeah. I threw like five and a half innings, and then a kid closed it out for one and a half, and he got the dog pile. Damn. Oh. Oh, no.

You had to get on the dog pile? Like you were just like a regular schmo? Yeah. Came in from right. Yeah. Houston's pitcher had 115 pitches through seven. Dude, I took the Yankees' money line yesterday in the sixth inning. Late in the game, they fucking came back.

I think they had no hits when I took it. It was 485. It felt great, dude. It felt fucking sick. So, a guy finished seven innings, had two left, and was pitching a no hit and it took him out yes he had 115 pitches they're very like have you ever seen no combined no hitter i'm with steve on this from the outside that seems crazy seems insane it's

more commonplace now because pitch count has like become a big thing and 115 pitches a lot of pitches was it ended was it end of an inning yeah was that guy pissed i don't think so 100 115 pitches a lot of pitches you basically let's go back to complete the no hitter he would have had to pitch 140 pitches which would have been astronomical no the disparity between 115 and 140 a lot 115 is on the high end in today's baseball. For, like, injury risk? Yeah. There's a lot of teams will take a guy out right around 100, and so 115 is a lot.

140 would be a lot. Nick, what is happening inside of you right now, Nick? My stomach hurts so bad right now. He has ego death. Also, Steven, if it was a perfect game, they probably would have kept him in, but no hitters happen like every other day. It was an ayahuasca check. Not every other day, but they happen more than you think.

They happen more often. They happen like once a month. I will say the pitch count's gotten better. It was like nuts at one point. Do you remember like Jabba Ball? Yeah, they would. The Yankees? Yeah. That was insane. Yeah, no, like Strasburg. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's on crazy pitch counts.

Owen has a sneaky, goaded amount of baseball knowledge. He does. Clayton Kershaw got pulled from a no-hitter this year. So it happens. Nick is to football as Owen is to baseball. Nick, how are you feeling? Not good at all. I have to go do a fucking Talkies commercial after this.

I love Talkies. No. Yeah. What do you a fucking talkies commercial after this. I love talkies. No. Yeah. What do you mean, like speaking films? Yeah. What's the part of the talkies? Oh, yeah. You're fucked.

Yeah. Let's go poop, dude. I have a very full day today. Let's go poop. You have a full stomach right now, dude. Empty that thing out. Jerry, what do you think? What about the chip? Yeah, just about anything. Yeah, what are you think about the chip yeah just about or anything yeah what are you thinking jerry no hitters your your thoughts are valuable and i want to hear more of

them i spaced out a while ago it's an honest man yeah same with sass dude i didn't spend i'm paying attention i just like i can't talk yeah his voice dude he's about to lose he's got future lost voice he's gotta got to save his voice. It's going, dude. It's getting worse by the second. By the short his voice. Because if I knew I was going to lose my voice, I'd be singing. Yeah, me too, from the rooftops.

Why? Last hurrah. What? Yeah, his last hurrah. Trying to save it. We have an issue that demands my immediate attention. What is it? On the wheel, we had a six and a nine, but they were not underlined.

So I'll go back and look at the tape. Oh! Here, Che. No, no, the last one was a six. The second one was a nine. No, Big Cat read six. The last one was a nine, I believe. So the first one should have been a six.

I believe it was as well. All right, easy fix, Chad. I'll have to go back in our roos. And, yeah, that's the link. It'll be good. We'll get Dave some tapes. We'll have a ninth pick. Get Dave back in.

I just texted Dave saying he hooked up six and nine. No, I mean, I'm going to go back and review the tapes, and it's going to be very easy to fix because they're all put in an order. Yeah. Thank you for that. It's not like a big man to mess up the six. I had to let him know. Listen, Steven, if you haven't figured out,

my job for this fantasy league is to get you in as much hot water as possible. I feel like I'm in hot water very often. I know. That's good for the show. It is. We want you to just be always having to dodge bullets as the commissioner of this league. Slash slaps. I mean, these guys have no idea who I am, and I'm just a guy texting them often about rules.

Right. Okay. You have no idea who they are. I don't think Che's a nerd in that group chat at all. No, he is. I don't know. Like Alex Bregman sounded lame talking about fantasy football. I think like everyone does.

When you talk in detail, it's nerdy. So he could just blend in the fantasy hubbub. We'll see. A little blendini. A great blendini. Fuck yes, bro. Erica's in. You see that?

Yeah, look at John Rich just planting himself next to Erica. Suck up. I thought you were going to say planting a kid. All right. Well, I think people have shit they have to do today. So tomorrow we're going to decide the case race teams. Can we do like a spy cam on Nick as he poops? It's my worst nightmare. I have never do today. So tomorrow we're going to decide the case race teams. We do like a spy cam on Nick as he poops.

It's my worst nightmare. I have never shit here and I didn't plan to. Oh you have to now. I think he does. You need to empty your stomach dude. That's the only way that

you're going to have a normal rest of your day. Otherwise you are carrying poison. It's facts. Poop with us. I'm worried about my butthole.

Poop among us. Bro you got dude whips. It's not hurt. Alright so tune in tomorrow butthole. Hoop among us. Bro, you got dude whips. Doesn't that hurt? All right, so tune in tomorrow. Someone's going to be monster ripped. Mystery monster ripped. We're going to do the wheel as soon as this show ends. Yes, and yeah, because we can actually keep it rolling.

End the show, TJ, but obviously tape it, and then we can reveal the monster rip at the end of the show tomorrow. And we're going to do teams tomorrow. Yes, and so there'll be 10 people, and we're going to spin the wheel to determine who the five teams are. So teams are completely random? Yes. Do we have 10 or 11? Do we want to do completely random?

That was at the request of one of our guests. All right. I'm down for that. Why not? It's kind of fun. Do we have 10 or 11, though? Don't we have our 10? Because Brandon's out.

Oh, Brandon's out. Brandon is also out. Brandon is out. So we Brandon's out. Brandon is also out. Brandon is out. So we'll have 10. A clean 10. We'll have a clean 10, and then we will have everyone, every team will have to present a PowerPoint.

Did you want to do five big guys, five little guys and match them or no? We talked about that. I think it should be purely random. Just want it totally random. Yeah. What if Shane and I are on the same team? And that's awesome. And we do the case race in an hour. Then that's awesome. For everyone involved. It It's true people don't have to drink as much

It's like okay the Warriors fucking Won 73 games in a season They also lost in the finals I think Shane just wants to break up the glory boys They'd hate to see us winning They do hate to see us win We should have a minimum That everyone has to reach

I think it would kind of suck. I mean, what if it's like 30 minutes? Yeah, right. Who cares if it's 30 minutes? We should have a floor that everyone has to reach. Otherwise, they're eliminated from the next case race. Okay. I like that.

16 combined team beers. 16 combined. I thought you meant like an individual floor. Oh, we could do it that way. I would say 16 as a team. So eight a person. Yeah, eight a person. So everyone has to do eight that way. I would say 16 as a team. So eight a person. Yeah, eight a person. So everyone has to do eight.

So everyone has to do eight beers a person. Are you okay with that, KB? Yeah. That would be tough, but I like the challenge. Yeah, because I just think everyone should get as drunk that way. Definitely. We don't have a situation where Sass and I are the only ones talking. Nick, my tummy kind of hurts too, Nick.

I think he's going around. I did have some hot chicken fingers for lunch, so I kind of hurts too, Nick. I think he's going around. I did have some hot chicken fingers for lunch, so I kind of know what you're doing. Jerry had chicken as well. Jerry had chicken as well, so we kind of know where you're going. It's kind of a shared experience. Solidarity, bro. I feel like Nick's afraid to move. I am.

You might shit. If you poop yourself, it will be hot magma. How much, where does it hurt right now? Like, vertical line. Oh.

Oh, God. So your mouth is good? No. That hurts too. I mean, my lips hurt. It will make you appreciate your esophageal health

on all other days. Like, right now, I'm so thankful for the pain I don't have. So you're kind of giving us that gift as well. Maybe give one of us a kiss. Spin the wheel. Alright. We'll see everyone tomorrow. Monster Rip. Mystery Monster Rip, which will be very fun.

Subscribe, please, to the act. Subscribe, subscribe. Hit that subscribe. If you're watching right now, just hit subscribe. Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it. Please, we want to get to 100,000. Please, we have a huge week for everyone. Chat owns us. We are your bitch. Please subscribe. Please, we're begging you.

All right, see everyone tomorrow. 30 seconds. 30 seconds. These guys have an almost fighter pilot mentality, and that's what separates them from mere mortals. All I ever do is pray for a safe race. I never thought that I'd be there one day watching my son. For me, it's heart attack after heart attack. Are you okay, Nico?

Get me out of this fire. This fire. I love the danger. That adrenaline and that excitement. They have crashed! They've gone into each other! I'll do anything I can to get the best results possible. I'm not worried about dying. It's the act. Bye.