The Yak - One of the Boys Fell Victim to a Kiss Coin | The Yak 2-15-23

Episode Date: February 15, 2023

You're a wizard, HarryYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Of all the things in life, one of the best has to be getting high whenever you want, wherever you want, without the paranoia of consuming some sketchy black market bunk. What's the best way to do that? With 3Chi, of course. 3Chi has the highest quality cannabis products from their delicious Delta 9 edibles and their industry-leading Delta 8 products to their new line of Delta 9-O vapes

and everything in between. When you buy 3Chi, you know you're getting the highest quality in purity, taste, and that craveably potent buzz every single time. All products are formulated by a biochemist and made in the USA with USA grown hemp. Yak listeners get an exclusive 15% discount on all of 3Chi's premium THC products. Go to 3chi.com. Use promo code YAK15 to take 15% off your order. Again, that's 3chi.com.

3-C-H-I.com. Use promo code YAK15 to get 15% off your order. Must be 21 or older to purchase. Please use responsibly. Yo, DJ, hold that up. Sorry, it's me. Dang. I feel pretty rich right now. I feel very wealthy sitting in this seat. That's where the money is. That's where the money is.

That's where the money is. That seat has money. Split that thing open and see if he has money stuffed in there. Yeah, this seat feels much more firm than the others. Interesting. It has to be. Hey, everybody. Are you in your comfort zone?

Nope. Why don't you apologize? Yeah, I'm sorry, everyone. There we go. I'm sweating. There she is. I am sweating. All right.

I sat here in hopes that there would be some split between us I'm sorry, everyone. There we go. I'm sweating. There she is. I am sweating. All right. I sat here in hopes that there would be some split between us so we don't look exactly alike again. But here we are again, Kate. Wearing hats and our glasses. Yeah, it's rough. I guess this is what it is still. Yeah, we have the same hair color, too. The same coloring.

We just look exactly alike, and I can't get over it. I'm sorry for that, too. I feel bad for that as well. Nick does very well. He's very handsome. Well, hot news of the day, the person here who got the most Valentine's romance of all of us last night, KB. Oh, yes. Out in the streets.

Yeah. What a guy. How did this happen? I was walking down my block, and he approached out of nowhere and just whistled. It was like a, you know, I can't do it, but KB real quick. Getting like a whispering tone as if we were just hanging out for 10 minutes. And he pulled out his wallet. He didn't say any other words.

He pulled out his wallet. I think it was a Lacoste Fitzgerald. And nestled right in there with the same comfort and familiarity as a crisp 20 or a crumpled one was the kiss coin, was the yak coin. What season? I just saw what it was, and it was game over. Season twos mean a little bit less. It's a two. Oh, do a nice, slow scroll up for this one.

Maybe like season one. We did a video, we did multiple pictures while our respective girlfriends looked on in horror. And was there a lip touch? He was smooth with it, yeah. Why are you? Like he was. Broken him so hard.

That's just how I hold. Something to do, yeah. Other than that, it was pretty. I mean, I was not as awkward as you would think it was just a nice transaction how'd you explain it to um like uh your guys's girl it's kb she was uh his girlfriend was worse off because he initiated it and she had no idea mine wasn't surprised does she even know that like you spent $55 on a coin

on the off chance you see a yeah sky and he has it on him you carry it with you all the time the way

it was just nestled in there like he had to put it in there that night before he went out expecting that to happen he was

he's seen you do you think he's seen you around the block are you concerned he knew where you would be no no he wasn't like weird or pushy about it yeah he was like he had to do it he had to check it off and then he got moving yeah no small no small talk so no small rightfully his yeah he just kept it pushing yeah so did you have to talk about that with your significant other afterwards? Like, yeah, that's a thing that's probably going to happen.

She didn't know what the bit was, but she was not shocked that I did that. I have a tendency of giving too much during those interactions. That is tough to have boundaries, but also give people what they want. These ain't conversation coins at all. Are we going to just keep making them? Are we going to print more and dilute them and print more and dilute them? Yeah, I don't know. How many are on the streets?

1,000? I think 1,000. More. I feel like I see a lot of season twos or season seven. The second run. The second run I see those more often than I see the first one. Jay, do you, what is it, season seven? The second run. The second run, I see those more often than I see the first one. Jay, do you know how many is on the streets?

I think it's like 250 of the first and 500 of the second, maybe. Okay. They sell out a lot. They sell instantly. But there's only been two real, like, mouth-to-cheek connections. That's Che and your kiss, right?

Yours was mouth-to-mouth, wasn't it? I think we, yeah, during the video, yeah. We just need to make, if we do them again, they have to be way more convenient to bring out. Way more inconvenient. A hubcap. A dinner plate. A chain.

Like a yoke. Just yak season. What season are we in? 13? Car bumper. When do we go to 13? We're in 10X right now. Oh, we're in season 10. Yeah, let's do the season 10 kettlebell.

Yeah. Kiss kettlebell. That's a great idea. How about everybody else? Rowan, you had a fancy dinner last night. Very nice. It looked very nice. It was very nice.

Thank you for noticing. It was lovely. What did you have? Beef Wellington. Some gnocchi beforehand. You guys fuck with gnocchi? My favorite of the pasta. Very good.

It's my favorite pasta, too. I don't believe I've ever had it. Never had gnocchi? I was shocked to learn it's potatoes. Order some right now, Brandon. I got you, Brandon. Pesto or red? Let's force Chris Clemmer to eat some.

Oh, Chris Clemmer can can eat any food that's stuffed. In another food. Can't do burritos, can't do empanadas, can't do rigatoni, can't do any food that makes him vomit. It's completely cased in another food? Cased in another food, yeah. He can't eat a pocketed food. Is there a name for that, or is he the only person? And he talks about it with such an attitude.

That's how it should be for everyone. Such a dickhead about it. Yeah, he's a he talks about it with such an attitude like that's how it should be for everyone. Such a dickhead about it. Yeah, he's a dickhead about it. That's kind of a dickheaded thing to have. Yeah. Oh, I can't eat pocketed foods. He said like if he has to eat a burrito, he'll have to rip it open. Like it's like the superior

aversion. Can he eat like a jambalaya? I think he could, yeah. Does he feel like a tick or something? I don't know. Like a pie. He could eat a pie. Yeah.

He couldn't eat one of the McDonald's pies. Yeah, no turnovers. He could eat a shepherd's pie, I think. Not a pot. Not a pot. Not a pot. Well, damn. Yeah.

He's a dickhead about it. Where should I get this gnocchi from? Serafina? Yeah. A Pecorino Bianca? That has the fastest delivery time. Let's get this gnocchi here. Stat.

You a pesto guy, Brandon? Or do you want red sauce? I'd prefer red, I think. I'm going to get us a bunch of... I'm going to get whatever Rowan gets. I'm just going to get us a bunch of gnocchi, I think. Yeah. Could go for some gnocchi.

Just pasta? I know what it is. I've seen it. It's little pasta balls. But it's potatoes. I've seen it. It's little pasta balls. It's potatoes, I guess. Yeah, it's potato pasta. Dude, I was at Pat Bess' house on Monday, and two weeks beforehand, he had said his chef made him gnocchi, and he thought it was disgusting, and he served it to his dog.

And then on Monday, I saw his chef, and he was like, what the fuck, man? He's like, I've made it for him four times before. It always gets eaten, but it's just by his friends. He's serving it to the dogs. Is he going to catch on to a team or what? Yeah. Just waiting to get all the... Yeah, it's close to a team.

It's close to a team. I bet it'll happen. Who knows when it'll happen. Gotta cross the T's and dot the lowercase J's. My buddy and his roommate's doing Yoki Tuesday. Who knows what will happen? Gotta cross the T's and dot the lowercase J's. My buddy and his roommates do Gnocchi Tuesday. And they make Gnocchi. Handmade.

Make it? Yeah. Like in your... I've seen him make it. It's crazy. Jazz's friends are way more interesting than him. Yeah. Oh, it's just one of them. He's like a cook.

And he's funnier than you two, right? He has like a roller. It's cool. They're a lot more educated. Roll one. More educated. It's a roll one. More educated, funnier, more worldly, better abs. All of my friends dropped out. Really?

There's like one that's still in college. Who do you think here has the best friends? Best group of friends? Ooh. Probably Maresh. Well, it has to be. It's everybody's friend. Oh, you got to pick your best five friends.

Who has the best group of five friends? Top to bottom? Yeah. I have a real murderer's row. Yours is good? Stinky Tony, Sweet Potato Pat, Maresh. I have a real crew. I've got a good gang.

Kyle's is loaded. I wouldn't send my top five out to the Wolves like that. They would get destroyed by any team. Mine are struggling too. I have a my top five out to the Wolves like that. They would get destroyed by any team. I'm struggling too. I have a weak top five. Kyle is the ringleader of his crew too, which is the crazy part. It's unbelievable seeing those guys walk through a bar. It's Jordan Marrero.

You haven't met him. He's just never around. They cause trouble. They're just our trouble makers. I might be, yeah. I might be. I got five mics that would go toe-to-toe with anybody. I got Dr. Ned Miller and Alan Brown, Matt Warren.

Then I don't know who four and five are. I might not go five deep. Matt Warren never lies. Matt Warren, we saw UFOs with him in 95, didn't we? 95, October 95, thank you. Yeah, we were in his Nissan. Brandon and Matt Warren saw a UFO together in 95. Over there. Yeah. we were in his Nissan. Brandon and Matt Warren. It's all UFO together, 95. We were there.

Yeah. It was just right up there. Yeah. Oh, bro, there's a lot of pesto. I'll get Uncle Tony's homemade gnocchi. Oh, God. Oh, Uncle Tony's. I'm an ah.

I'm an ah. Oh, my God. Brandon, did you get your bonus? Five orders of it or what? It's bonus day What are you spending yours on Don't fuck with me Nick What

Don't Huh The 15th brother Yeah They moved that Happy holidays Wait they moved it Is it today or no

It's today Okay I want to treat myself I bought Aragorn's sword From Lord of the Rings one for one replica that's why I'm getting all this fucking milking

54 pounds priority yeah what uh where's it from where'd you buy it from Middle Earth I guess is it a real sword yeah

need to look at that for comics heavy or what yeah it's heavy as fuck I don't think it's 54 pounds I think it's 15 pounds but it's heavy as fuck. I don't think it's 54 pounds. I think it's 15 pounds, but it's 54 inches, the blade, not including the hilt. Should be pound per inch. Yeah, I guess if it was...

You bought a sword? Don't even... All right. I'm just saying, you're not helping yourself. You're trying to get 200 knives. That's not going to help. No, it doesn't. You have like an AR-15 airsoft gun in the office.

You got conned by an Instagram ad. It doesn't work. It was probably the price of two swords. They gave you the display model. It's in the biggest suitcase you could ever see ever. The Lucas. Yeah. None of my Harry Potter wands really worked worked but they came with a postcard from

the woman who's like the middleman who was her holding a baby and she was like if your wands don't work don't be upset right away i'm a new mom oh i was like okay i guess so just take this one it was very nice of you you gave one of the wands to my friend josh that was visiting who has a harry potter sleeve and she gave him one of the wands but my buddy Josh's biggest downfall is that he's the dumbest person to ever live. And he's a cop.

That too. And a former Marine. So bad in high school, bad guy, Harry Potter sleeve. I vibe with that. 0 for 3 on Varner. He is jacked.

Oh, I said his full name. But he's in your, what position is he in your top 5 He's fighting for one He's fighting for one He looks lovely Strong

What is that Ah yes thank you Oh my god Look at that Let me take it Kate gave him one of those wands that shoot fire, and I put one in, and I shot it, and then he put one in, and the battery must have died,

but that perplexed him too much. And so he's fiddling around in the wand, and he's like, oh, here's why it's not working. And he rips out the wire. He's like, there's a fucking wire in here. Dude, you broke it. That's the whole point. You broke the wand.

And we were at dinner with him, and Kyle was so enamored by his Harry Potter obsession. And Josh goes, Kyle asked how many wands he has. And Josh answers, I have two fakes and three real. No, you have five fakes. What do you mean real? You don't have any real wands, dude. What do you mean real wands? He's the best.

Are any of you playing the game? Sass, you're a gamer. No, I don't play that stuff. But I've heard it's fun. People seem to like it. It looks cool. It was real condescending. No, I just don't play role-play games.

I have a cousin with a golden snitch tattooed on her butt. I could have guessed. Is it easily caught? I have multiple cousins with golden snitches. Every game's ending pretty quick. Get your bludgers out. A girl used to have a coiffle on her inner thigh.

What's up, Brandon? I just gave up on it. No, go on. I never saw Harry Potter or read it. I just, I never got in that universe. It's very good.

It's pretty good. Actually, I mean, the books, especially as someone you love to read. I do love to read. So why not treat yourself

to just like the best journey of your life? I'm 40 pages away from finishing the latest John Grisham novel. You can't say what you're reading because then you'll just get DMs of how the book ends.

Do you know what I do though? He reads the end before he starts it. I read half the book and then I get to a point where I gotta know what happens to these people and I go to the last two pages and I read it. I find out what happens and then I go back and fill in the rest. We gotta get you shorter books. I know what happens, but the journey getting there is fun.

I don't like suspense. No, I do that for movies. Matt Warren taught him that move. Well, Matt Warren doesn't really read as many books as you ought to. Why do you read suspense books? I don't read suspense books other than John Grisham. I only read John grisham because he's from mississippi and i got into him when he was uh younger and just starting out and it just

stuck with me it's amazing that people from shitty states have such pride in the people that are from their state i'll turn up brad paisley i love brad paisley oh all right he's my favorite my favorite guy i secretly have never listened to him. What's the song he sings? Fishing song. What's that? I can't name one. I'm Gonna Miss Her.

Oh, I'm gonna miss her. Well, I don't think he really says it like that. That was pretty good. I haven't even seen Big Fat Greek Wedding. Oh, yeah. Is Brad the... No, no, another guy from our hometown. John Corbett. Oh, the Sex and the City guy. Oh, yeah. I Brad the... No, no, no. Another guy from our hometown. From Wheeling, John Corbett. Oh.

The Sex and the City guy. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I haven't seen that either. Didn't know he was West Virginia. Like, people from cool places don't give a fuck. Right. Too much history.

Probably from Philly. Okay, yeah. Too much history in New York. Like, you just go through fucking neighborhoods. There's probably fucking, like, a famous person probably got assassinated there yeah from a cool place but there's not too much history there's just enough history

well the history we have isn't great so yeah history really started like 1978 who's the most famous person from Duxbury me yeah now I don't know

there was one dude that went No You Oh Scott Woodruff From Stick Figure The band Oh yeah

He's got you He's got you beat Yeah It might be you They're pretty big Stick Figure's pretty big now Now They sell out six shows in Boston

Is this Woodbury? Like a theater Or an arena. Joe Perry from Aerosmith. Oh my god, yeah. That guy doesn't even have a link. Joe Perry. He's not even clickable. Oh no, no.

Stick figure's big. You chose a non-clickable man. Yeah, Joe Perry lives right next to where I used to go to the orthodontist. He lives in a weird area that you wouldn't expect him to live, but it's all gated off. Why did you say Joe Perry? I forgot that he lived there. I'm in a bookstore one time in Duxbury.

Huh. Yeah. Roan, do you have a page? Hell no. Roan's got to have a wiki. There's so many lesser people with pages. You have credits. Yeah, but who's going to...

Yeah. I don't think it's... I don't even know if Big Cat or Portnoy does. I think the Yak has. I love Wikipedia. It does. I really appreciate it. He's like the executive producer.

That's the IMDB. That's the IMDB. Yeah. Or KB's the director or something. Listen, hey, I wouldn't mind one. Someone weird to make you one? Yeah. A really in-depth one.

What do they have? What do they need? The N-word. Wait, wait, one. What do they need? The N word. Wait, wait, wait. What was that? Who was it? You were going? No, that was Dave.

Oh. Oh, damn. That was a header? That had a whole section? No, but it was a clickable link. Yeah. Oh, man. Link.

TJ, why was that link purple? Curious. Oh, man. No idea what they were talking about. Good shit. That sucks. I thought it was a header section. Use and misuse of the N-word.

Where are you technically from? Are you from where you grew up or are you from where you were born? From where you like are you from where you grew up or are you from where you were born from where you grew up from where you grew up yeah grew up yeah makes sense yeah the place you were born in a place you're from uh that's a good question yeah so like curry isn't from akron right correct yeah you guys can just say it. I'm thinking. It's all about where you rep.

True. It's where you went to school. So where's 21 Savage from? I don't know either answer. It's England. He was born in England, but he's an Atlanta rapper type of guy. When did he get to Atlanta? Right in the nick of time.

Last in time. Just in time. Does that bother people, though? That he's like an Atlanta guy when he's not... Or like, no, nobody cares. When it first came out, I think people were angry. Yeah, it was like three Super Bowls ago. Falsely angry three Super Bowls ago. Oh, seven. Seven's pretty young.

It's in the first sentence, too. Four Super Bowls. Does he have a British accent? No. Not at all. Not even close. Sweet me, too. Four Super Bowls. Does he have a British accent? No. Not at all. Not even close. Sweet be chimney, governor. I'll be funny if that, how he speaks is a British accent.

Harry, am I a knight? Buckbeak. What are you doing? Harry Potter. Oh. Yeah. I tried. So, Corey Rutledge got mad at me because you were in it.

I think you guys were in it, but we did that Fantasy Island house or Love Island or whatever it was, the house. And all I was supposed to do was speak in a British accent. And I couldn't do it. I don't have that in my bag. We sat there for 20 minutes, him trying to make me say governor and in it. Good move not to. I did it, but I can't do it. I didn't know it was a Love Island parody

and I've never seen Love Island. And so Corey was like, just read this line in an accent. I went full Chinese. How did it sound? Really good. But hopefully that footage is very deleted. Hello, Rudy.

Rudy wearing the tungsten shirt. I'm going to get him on. Yo, yo, yo. Rudy, rocking the tungsten. Sorry, Kyle told me to come on. Happy belated birthday. Thank you. Happy birthday.

Yeah, appreciate it. Yeah, also, yeah, new tungsten merch. Oh. We finally got it. We're selling that, or you just bought that? We're selling that on Anus. Oh, nice. That's going to do number.

This is going to sell the hardest unit to sell, which is one. One. One isn't the hardest. One is the hardest. I bet you it's like four. Four, yeah. Yeah. That's going to sell.

Because two, you could be mom and dad. Four, you have to have a couple people that are just like, I want this. We talked about doing that. For whoever can get closest to four shirts sold. Oh, yeah. Weren't we trying to do like a lowest amount of shirts sold? ZBT does that. Really good at that.

Yeah. Really? They're like, congrats, guys. You got two hoodies sold this time. And we're like, yay. Shout out to your buddy. You guys can at least guilt people. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. I don't have that luxury. A waitress gave me a fucking military discount. I felt so uncomfortable. Just to be nice or she thought you were a vet? They were supposed to give me an egg white omelet and they gave me regular eggs. She wanted to take some off,

so she was like, I'm throwing a military discount on here. That's stolen valor, right? You shouldn't have accepted that. I tried not to. She forced it down my throat. She was a minority as well, so I didn't want to argue with her publicly.

That's a quandary. That was like a one-off joke we made. I'm not convinced anybody bought that. There's no way. You have to really, really wear that on your back. Can we get the final number for merch on Trent's do-rags? Do we know how many?

A lot. A salesperson came up to me they were like thanks for like there was an odd spike of do-rag sales on the store that huge section

of the warehouse full of do-rags finally I'd love to go to the barstool warehouse and just see how they're chefing things up

like where's it all coming from like what's the process is it just boxes of fucking is there a barstool warehouse or is it just like a third party type thing I don't know it's all got to be coming from some kind of

fulfillment center where it all happens together at once like even just the section of the warehouse oh i've been getting dms from people who got the 2022 cake race shirts oh they're still setting those out um they're unique they're worth more, some would say. Yeah, merch is tricky. It is. It's tricky. Do we have any Travis submissions? Oh.

Yeah, like most of them were not people named Travis. That's the one thing we needed. Right. But it was enough that I need like some time to go through them without doxing people. But there were some. Yes, definitely. Can we just see one? Yeah, did any get you a little bit excited that you were like, oh.

Yeah, let me find it. There was one that had pictures of Travis and KB in them. You were with a Travis? Huh. Are you the one that brought up this contest? Because this is interesting now. Prohaska? You're trying to parasite aite a Travis in a year?

I don't know. Who was it? Let me find it. Someone texted me one. What do you mean? Parasite like the movie. I got one from a guy named Tavis. Wait, there's a Tavis?

He's in. He's in. Choose a real name with a smaller universe. Tavis. The world's funniest Tavis. I know a Tavis. You know a Tavis. Have a smiley?

Tavis McMillan, he was one of my coaches at Denver. He called me to say happy birthday. Big dude. Tavis McMillan. How Irish is he? Whatever Irishness he may or may not have had has completely been eroded away by his Canadian-ness. He is full, full Canadian.

Yeah, to the core. He's got a new arm sleeve he just got. It's pretty metal. Big guy. Big guy? Big guy. Huge arms. Truck driver arms is what they call them.

Is it a sleeve if it's anywhere other than your arm? You can get a leg sleeve. Is it a sleeve? it's anywhere other than your arm? You can get a leg sleeve. Is it a sleeve? Yeah. Pant? American hockey players who have never even played or lived in Canada, did they take on the Canadian accent? Big time.

Seems like it. Big time. It's amazing. Every hockey guy is the same person. It's accepted, but I think that once you venture into the outside world, you have a moment of realization that you've adopted a culture that really isn't quite your own. Wit does that a little bit. Yeah.

Wit has a little bit. Buddy. Yeah. What's going on, buddy? Hi. What's up, guy? Yeah, and it gets tricky with Boston, too, because you're mixing all three. Boston dude hockey

and then Canadian and then like hockey and Canadian are so tethered but I try to just like work that out of my vocab but some of it is sick like the other day I was talking about someone's hair and I was like oh that guy's got sick lettuce and it like froze the room that just plays I think we're like what the fuck does that mean I think lettuce has has beyond hockey. I agree. Yeah, it was. Prohaska. That's true. Yeah. Kyle, what are you?

What's up with your lips? What's going on, man? Those are great lips. That was my first time ever drinking alcohol. It was at his party junior year. Yeah. You guys look so great. Yeah, I remember I wore that Penn State shirt. Wait, wait.

Where are you? I'm right there. That's a rare style of backwards hat that died. Damn, you got multiple pictures of it. On top of the head. That's like a Ryan Sheckler look. Yeah, it's like the backwards yarmulke. Yeah.

That's awesome. He's funny? No, he's a cool guy, though. Travis, I mean, I don't know if you want to... Bangs out of the backward. Oh, he grew up. Yeah, he did. He's on the right.

All right, thanks, Travis. Yeah, you're welcome to join. What's his gig now? He's got to be a planner. He definitely works with his hands. I think he got some type of engineering degree. I'll have to ask him. He looks like he works with gas.

Yeah, he grew up big, big blue collar. As blue collar as you can get for Ohio County. He looks like he shovels coal into an engine. I think the most blue collar of blue collar jobs is the guys who do the change outs on the oil rigs. Oh, yeah. That video that goes viral. It can't be an actual goal that people have. And I know that guy intentionally

gets a little mucked up. That can't be a real job. It's a real job. If it is, I don't know. They have to get paid a good amount of money. How many times could you do that a day? Once. And they're covered in oil.

Like, soaked in oil. It's one of my biggest tsunamis and oil rigs. These are my biggest. This guy. This is not a job. This is not a real job. How many times does he do this a day? Watch how good he is.

No one is doing this. Nobody's doing this. And how do they memorize these moves? Oh, dude. Didn't they call them rig pigs? I wanted to see somebody's first day on the job doing it. Dude, imagine. Also, dude, going no tarp is for sure an OSHA violation.

Oh, yeah, absolutely. Dude. Also, like, this system, like, have we not advanced far enough? This has to be automated. Yeah. I watch a lot of these. I thought you were talking about the guy that went viral a couple days ago for cleaning the outside of the oil rig. Oh, what's that one?

This isn't the video. I've seen messier. I've seen messier when it bubbles up. The offshore rigs that are in the water, he has to – that guy. I thought you were talking about that guy. This dude. I didn't even think about this job. Look at him.

I forgot about ocean poles. Why is he using water if there's water everywhere? He's dying. Why does that shit have to be seen? He's dying. Why does he have to clean that? You guys couldn't put me in? I like low-key.

Is he spraying it with a hose? He's tied to it like something better. He's cleaning it with a fucking hair dryer. That is way less sexy than the other one. Jesus. How do you get into that? How do you get into that line of work? They make so much money. Do they?

Those diver guys. Diver guys. That sucks. Oh, yeah. You always read the comments on those and it's all other rig workers who are like, yep, that's how I lost eight of my toes. That's how I lost a leg. That's the life.

The one guy in the first video had a big – he had a chain on. Couldn't that just rip his head off? Yeah, absolutely. There's no way he's just chilling like that. How about the guys that climb cell towers and replace those things? I have a buddy who got out of the Marines and did a program. It was like troops to Windmills or something. And now he always sends me pictures from the top.

Does he make money? Yes, he makes a ton of money. Do those people just have something missing in their brain or they don't care if they die? I don't think he cares. He's a big drinker. He's having a great time. I think those guys die about once a year. Yeah, they don't have a fear processing.

They don't have the necessary fear. The amygdala is kind of skewed. But the more dangerous and miserable it is, it's almost like a bigger badge of honor. What is the one job? I don't even know what it is. The one where the... I don't know if it's something with welding or something,

where they're putting the thing out on the platform, and then this thing comes down, and it's like... Like a stamp? Yeah. Oh, and the sparks fly everywhere? It's like the loudest... It's like. Like a stamp? Yeah. What is that? Can we find it? And it's like the loudest. It's like, dude, working there must be fun. Do you know what I'm talking about, Brandon?

Is it? Vaguely, yeah. What is it? It's something. You're doing a hot torch and then you push it out and it makes into sheets, I believe. I grew up next to a steel mill. And it's so big. Yeah, I grew up near a bunch of steel mills.

And it would literally like earthquake seismic shakes. You would hear it like in the middle of the night because they go all night and it would be glowing. And then like the house would shake when they would drop. I don't know what they were doing in there. The popular TikTok genre is them revealing their lunches. And they have the worst diets in the world. We love hot cheetos. Mountain Dew.

Who's that? And they don't wash their hands beforehand. No. Laborers. All laborers. Sandwiches they bought, yeah. I believe you get your ass kicked if you wash your hands. Do you?

You can't. Yeah, like construction workers in the bodega in the morning, they get straight fucking jet fuel. It's like a large coffee. They also need calories in a way that we don't. Right, yes. We're sitting. The boys at the concrete plant would just eat popsicles all day.

That sounds good. Yeah, that sounds great. You always bring up the concrete plant. It is very true. You worked at a concrete plant. I did that. I was so out of place. Wait, what did you do there?

They had me driving the front end loader with no training up this ramp to pour the fucking concrete mix. There's such dickheads about it because i'm bad at it naturally and i had no training so i was like afraid for my life like like papa wheeling on that thing going down a ramp wait how did the guys would just clown me like what you never did this huh yeah nope very few, city boy. They call me a city boy because I lived in Kent, Ohio. How did you find that job? My boss would, my grandpa owned it. Oh, really? Yeah.

Yeah, he's dead. Nepotism. A nepo baby. Nepo concrete baby. They knew that and they hated me for it. Oh, yeah. My boss would drive his truck, I swear to God, from here to pod room two, go to the bathroom. That was to shit.

He would piss in his office in the trash bags, and I would have to take him out by the river and burn them. Burn the trash. You would burn your boss's piss? That's right. How would you burn his piss? You would piss his piss all in the trash? In the trash bags. We've talked about this before.

Was the concrete plant right by the shit plant? Very close. Oh, that had to have reeked. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. The shit plant. Our shit plant in South Wheeling, it sunk up for the entire town. On hot days, it would stink up the entire town.

Denver's got the dog food. Have you ever seen that? Oh, yeah. Dog food plant or whatever. On I-70, if you drive by on I-70, there's a dog food plant. They're cooking up a fresh batch. The whole city smells. Oh, God.

It's amazing. Yeah. It's very distinct. Buffalo's got the, they do like Cheerios or something. The whole city just smells like Cheerios. That's nice. That's great. Yeah, that's a good one.

Oh, it was a concrete plant right next to a pool of shit. Yeah, the Cheerios factory That's nice. That's great. Yeah, that's a good one. Oh, it was in a concrete plant right next to a pool of shit. Yeah, the Cheerios factory sounds brutal. I'm more focused on the burning of your grandfather's shit and piss in a plastic bag. Boss. His boss, excuse me. He was cool as fuck. Yeah, it probably had like an aerial

photo of it and it looked like Ohio does now. Oh, yeah. That's bad. Yeah yeah that's real bad yeah they're calling the chernobyl of ohio these ain't fucking storm clouds have you guys seen that yes you haven't seen that the guy almost actually super fucked up it's super fucked up but the guy is so annoying that you're almost like good uh yeah it's that sounds bad. Yeah.

I don't know where that would be, but it is the most like. Yeah, it's in. Oh, you can find that video everywhere. You guys worried about that or the balloons or any of that shit? Or are you guys just chilling? I would be a cold day in hell before I fear a fucking balloon. Yeah. That shit is way scarier.

I will never get in a hot air balloon. Oh, why are they wicker baskets? Why are they wicker? Yeah. That is the strangest thing to me, that people do that. There's just no way of controlling them. World War II, Japan sent like 5,000 of them over here, and they had bombs attached to them. And like 300 made it to the Northwest, and one of them killed a bunch of people. This is a downer, a scorpion.

A bunch of kids out on a church picnic. But yeah, so Japan used the jet stream to send a ton of bombs on balloons over here during World War. Yeah, they wanted to start forest fires and shit that would be apocalyptic level. Instead, they're just crashing trains. Yeah.

I've been on a big World War II kick. I've been watching a ton of documentaries. It's like a good entry point for a dude that's like, yeah, I know history. the most well documented very well uh a lot of good youtubes about it too oh fantastic yeah fantastic you get one then you got 10 more to watch yeah exactly it's a lot of fun the other night in phoenix i don't know why it's about hitler and stalin and their their clash yeah yeah stalin was a was a shifty motherfucker yeah he was a real cunt too yeah he was shifty i was just reading about mussolini getting uh he got caught and then

they sent in nazi paratroopers to break him out and like that would kind of be a sick movie we could probably never make it but just like mussolini getting saved by nazis like that does sound badass just they called them uh commandos yeah yeah like the Nazi commandos they were like the most brawly dudes this one dude was like the meanest one fucking ruthless Nazi was named Otto he was a commando movies were the Nazis of the heroes I think

that that would be a sick movie but we just can't make it it's like a probably a sick story for the people involved if you take out the context historically Mussolini fucking got killed anyway. If any of those people could have had

a Hollywood level movie production area, they could make the craziest movies. If Al-Qaeda could put out a movie, the fucking craziest movie of all time.

What if it just was their own movie? What if it was like, we gotta separate the art from the artist to give it the Oscar? Well, I mean, people kind of had to when they finally got their phones and hit the gym they were

putting out fire tiktoks were they yeah dude when they were in the gym like what are they not cape like we're like better at tiktok than them inherently like of course they're fucking nice attitude that they're probably crushing it it's probably incredible we're giving oscars to fucking roman polanski and fucking wo Woody Allen and shit like that. They deserve one. Preach. He's in Roman Polanski. He got banned after The Pianist, right?

Banned? Yeah, I mean, he fled to France. Yeah, he was banned from the United States. Yeah, banished. They also said Mussolini, when they caught him, they killed his mistress, too, and hung her upside down from the fucking... Yeah, that was like a real town square beating kind of death for him. Yeah, like why the...

Why'd they... Well, she knew... It went medieval. What's she supposed to do? Yeah, they went Old Testament. Not bad. They went Old Testament on Mussolini. Imagine like dating the girl,

like being the next boyfriend to that girl though, that you could do no wrong. If her ex is Mussolini. Mussolini used to take me shopping. I don't know why I made her spend. In my head she was. Mussolini used to take me out. In my head she was.

Mussolini loved to dance with me. Never liked dancing. He used to go to the hookah bar. Mussolini loved to dance with me. He never liked dancing. He used to go to the hookah bar. Mussolini. Oh, my God. And then two days later, Hitler and his bitch killed themselves. They definitely saw the writing on the wall. You think that's our gnocchi out there?

No, it's not enough. I got five servings of it. Oh, yeah. You want me to talk about what? High Noon? Yeah, we have three today. talk about what? High Noon? The deliciousness of High Noon hard seltzer, the best drink out there. We were in Phoenix last week and there were

High Noons for days, wherever we were. There were High Noons everywhere. The Barstool Bar, everywhere. It flowed like fondue. It was heaven. It certainly did. It's a hard seltzer made with real vodka, real juice, and sparkling water. It's actually made with vodka, not with malt like those other son of a bitches hard seltzers.

Yeah, I call them trash seltzers. I don't even talk about them. I hate to even talk about them. I won't even bring them up. Yeah, big cans now of peach and pineapple available. My favorite flavor is the peach. I also like the lime a lot. Watermelon.

I hate watermelon. I hate watermelon, the fruit, but I love the high noon watermelon flavor. I also like the lime a lot. Watermelon. I hate watermelon. I hate watermelon the fruit, but I love the high noon watermelon flavor. I don't know why. It's only 100 calories, gluten free, no added sugar. Their full time flavors are pineapple, black cherry, watermelon, grapefruit, lime, peach, mango, passion fruit, and

lemon. And if you find the lemon edition flavors like pear and cranberry, you buy the tailgate pack or you get the pool pack. You get the kiwi and the guava. Look for High Noon on Drizzly or at your local convenience or liquor store. Visit highnoonspirits.com and find it near you, or probably just go to a bar because your local bar probably has High Noon, and it's probably delicious, and it's probably fantastic.

Hell yeah. I would love to know the amount of High Noons we took down that whole week. It was a lot. Biblical. Yeah. Biblical. Yeah. Biblical. Deep-seated hatred for watermelon? I hate watermelon.

Really? It's my least favorite food. It's not strong enough of a flavor. It's very strong. Oh, I don't think so. Oh, I think it's real mellow. Yeah. That consistency, you don't fuck with that?

I don't like watermelon. I don't know what to tell y'all. It's red. It looks bloody. I don't like anything about watermelon. I hate watermelon. Okay, jammed. You like rare steak, though? y'all. It's red. It looks bloody. I don't like anything about watermelon. I hate watermelon. Okay, Jim. Do you like rare steak, though?

Love rare steak. Like literal blood, not things that remind you of blood. I don't like watermelon. I don't like it either. I'm in the same boat. I just want to give you a hard time. Oh, I love. I see cold when you're hungover.

It can get soggy, which is gross. Yeah, when it gets grainy, kind of, that's bad. You ever had it with- You get a good one. I kind of wish it was summer right now. I wish it was. Yes. I wish it was summer. It's soggy, which is gross. Yeah, when it gets grainy, kind of, that's bad. You ever had it with- You get a good one. I kind of wish it was summer right now. I wish it was. Yes. It's 62 out.

No, but I wish, like I got in that trouble last week for the dinner. The last year when I got in trouble, I sent him two Smith County watermelons to his place, and then he loved them, and then I got out of trouble. So I wish I could do that. I should probably just keep 10 watermelons. It's funny that you just regularly get into trouble. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. For leaving a dinner early. That wasn't overblown or anything like that. That's why I need this. What is Smith County? It's in the middle. It's in the central part of Mississippi, central southern part. Texas has some shit called like Death Smith County.

We also have, not all of our counties are greatly named we have jefferson davis suck names um how many counties in west virginia probably a lot that are also in mississippi i bet you calhoun is of calhoun county yep oh that was easy where's chickasaw county i like that name oh it's right by it's right up northwest of my town. We have a Wyoming county. I'm from Clay County. Henry Clay. Oh. Yeah. 82 counties in Mississippi. That's a lot.

Yeah, I sparkle it most days. Counties get smaller as things went west, right? Bigger. Yeah, I meant to say the exact opposite thing. Right. Oopsies. Or gigantic. Where's the biggest county?

Is it one in Eastern California or Montana? Who should we guess? Nevada has like, I nye county nevada is pretty fucking big that has like five counties they're huge big ass state yeah big ass state i think they if they rename jefferson davis's county you could get it brandon walker county or just walker county so we don't have a walker that seems like a lateral step. Going backwards. There's Brandon, Mississippi. Yeah, Walker County.

Okay, we can work on that. Brandon was a wrestling powerhouse in Tampa, Florida. Were they? Yeah. Counties, man. They're boring. Counties are boring. Yeah. A lot of shit goes down in counties though yeah everything yeah what do you mean we'll have a little township meeting well county government's

always a lot loose more loosely defined than city government and just in the small towns you really get away you get some characters in county government yeah nebraska has so many counties that have less than a,000 people total. Nebraska's counties are all tiny and square. They're all the same thing, right? Iowa is almost perfectly gridded except for one. Which one? One of the Northeast.

Who's one is that? That would be the one in the Northeast, right? It's infuriating. Iowa's sneaky big. It has a small shape, but it's a big state. I've got to go. Is it a small shape? Yeah, it's a small shape. It looks's a big state. I gotta go. Is it a small shape? Yeah, it's a small shape.

It looks like it should be small. Slim thick. But it's 23rd in size in the United States. That's small. My mom's whole family's from Canada and Iowa. They're all veterinarians out there. I hate Iowa. I want to go.

They're all veterinarians? Yeah. What's the one that fucked? Oh, bottom right? Bottom right fucked it all up. No, I think it's top. Oh, there's a couple there. No, it's top middle. I mean, the whole right. Oh, what the fuck's it doing? What's Koss that fucked? Oh, bottom right? Bottom right fucked it all up. No, I think it's top. Oh, there's a couple there. It's top middle.

I mean, the whole right. Oh, what the fuck's it doing? What's Kossuth doing? That sucks. No, I think it's also almost a perfect square number, like 100. That's infuriating. I like those counties. Why did they get double the size?

Why did they get that? Wait, there's a Sac City? Sac City, Iowa? Look at Potawatomi at the bottom left, my bad, Sass. That's like the same size as Kossuth. Yeah. Not a big deal. It's just Sac?

Yeah, there's 99 total counties. If they divided that one like it should be, it'd be 100. But Pottawatomie could be chopped in half, too. Yeah. Could easily chop Pottawatomie. If you're in Sac City, it should be a shirt. A Sac City shirt? Yeah.

How does it spell? S-A-C. A lot of geodes in Iowa. Was it Sacramento City or something? Yeah, Danny McBride fucks with those geodes. Yeah, you can just go- Oh, there's Calhoun and Webster. They're actually next door to each other in Mississippi, too.

That's weird. I love- Wait, there's just an Iowa County. That doesn't seem right. Why? Iowa County, Iowa? Yeah. That's all we do, bro. They got a Delaware. Why? Iowa County, Iowa? That's all we do, bro. They got a Delaware.

Delaware County. They got a Delco. Yo. Oh, they got a Delco, Iowa, bro. Hey, what the fuck? What's the name between Wayne and Davis on the bottom? Is that Appanoose? Yeah.

I like funny names, too. You were attracted to the Noose one, though. I hate that so many cities and places in the United States is just new place that already existed. You have such a great opportunity. New York? New York. Because we hated the sweet-ass Native American names. The Native American names were fire.

We wouldn't have been able to say that shit. Yeah, Long Island screws everybody up. Oh, yeah. Maranac and shit. Asapiqua. Well, isn't Manhattan supposed to be Algonquin? It was initially Algonquin. That's fire. Milwaukee is Algonquin for the good land. Wisconsin has some cool-ass names.

Talk to me. Sheboygan? Yeah, I love those names. Yeah, Sheboygan. That sounds like... Pennsylvania is rife with them. They're the worst. Aliquippa?

They have the worst names. You know about Aliquippa? Punxsutawney? Punxsutawney's incredible. How are these the worst? Don't they have Jersey Shore? They have Indiana, Jersey Shore, California, Wyoming. I'm talking about the Native American names.

Yeah, there's like Ireland, Scotland. All this bullshit. Northumberland. That's cool. Has the most letters of any county name. Pennsylvania? Yeah. In Pennsylvania or any?

It can't be any. That's not that many letters. Not really. Not 100% on that. Huh. They got the most of something somewhere. What's the longest word y'all know? Minor ultramicroscopic silicon volcanoconiosis.

That's one of the top ten, I think. Mine's like spontaneous. Yeah. Thanks, bro. Yeah. Not sure what the other one was. That's Brandon. When I was a kid, I memorized the dinosaur named Pachycephalosaurus

and I used to drop it on other kids they'd be like what's your favorite dinosaur and I'd be like oh Pachycephalosaurus I would have hated you as an adult

and you were a kid I would have hated you I was very yeah very annoying I'd always go with that one it's like this ugly dinosaur with a really hard head it's hideous

and I would pretend oh is it the one with like it's like they would headbutt each other yes it's the headbutt in one those were cool dinos they were Sac City where spirit flows where's that Iowa and I would pretend that... Oh, is it the one where they would headbutt each other? Yes, it's the headbutt one. Those were cool dinos. They were.

Sac City, where spirit flows. Where's that, Iowa? Yeah. That's awesome. That's Hackensack. Keeps trying to rebrand themselves as The Sac in New Jersey. That's so New Jersey. They moved to The Sac.

I think this place is nice. Which place? We all came from The Sac. Yo. What the fuck? It's crazy to the sack. I think this place is nice. Which place? We all came from the sack. Yo. What the fuck? It's crazy to think about. In the egg. We really were in there.

We were in the sack. We were in the egg. We linked up with ourselves. Wow. One minute away on these goddamn gnocchis. How do you want to do it? Should we just pass them around like a blunt?

I want Brandon to eat all five servings. Okay. I was thinking... I want that too. Last night, how many Twix I could get Brandon to eat if I had to guess left or right? And I said he was right for every single one. I think I could get you to

eat 12 Twix. But does that mean two Twix bars per pack? I would buy like 30 packages of Twix, and I would hand you one blind. You'd be blindfolded, and you'd have to say left or right. And I would lie to you and say you're being correct. Yeah. I think I could get you to have 12.

12, yeah. Not denying it. Even with this, no, I think you can get six right now. Right now, I think, yeah. You would still believe me. I guess right. No, no, I think you can get six right now. Right now, I think, yeah. You would still believe. I guess right. No, no,

I'm saying you're, I'm going to be saying that you're right. Like, yeah, that was right. So I would gas you up enough. I thought you were going to say I was wrong, so that I would keep going.

No, I'd be like, let's see who can get the highest score in the office. Oh, I see. And if we were on here cheering him on, we'd be like, oh my God,

he got another one right. Oh yeah, you'd eat this. I bet you I could get you to have, yeah, 12 is your number. Yeah, that would be a win him on. Yeah. Oh, my God, he got another one right. Oh, yeah. You did. I bet you I could get you to have, yeah, 12 is your number. Well, it would be easy. Yeah, that would be a win for you.

Yeah. I also love Twix. Who do you think we could get the highest in the office to? Well, Mince is gone. I think Billy Football would do fine. Billy Football, I think, would have like 200 Twix. Yeah. I think he would eat a lot.

Yeah, that's one of those ones you can have a lot of. I'm convinced that edamame doesn't take up any space. I don't ever want to talk about edamame ever again why worst experience in my life why i was at it we went to a chinese restaurant in pittsburgh for rediscovering america uh and i grabbed an edamame i was like what the fuck there's no beans in it i grabbed an edamame husk from fasasoli's sucked bowl. Oh no. That's the worst thing that's ever happened. Bro, you can't tell a sucked edamame? I just grabbly blind it.

I blindly grabbed it, tossed it in. I was like, what the fuck? It got out of my mouth and he was looking at me smiling. Your amount of Fasoli stories to the ratio of times you've actually been with Fasoli in the world is... No, I'm with him a lot. I know you're with him a lot, but you have a ton.

It's like you've been with him for 30 years. Yeah, he just always... He is my kryptonite. That's prolific. Sully dunked on me and said my AirPods were fake. Like, made a big scene out of it, laughed amongst others. Che, you have them, right? Oh, yeah, I think they're my bag.

They're real, right? I don't have AirPods. He says they're 100% fake. Is this the first Che we've had all day? What's up? I didn't know you were back there. They're so humble. I think in my backpack. Check after.

Does it matter if you have fake AirPods? It's a bit embarrassing Did you get them from Amazon? From Verizon store I don't think it's embarrassing at all I think it's just No but the way he approached it

Like he was you know Trying to dunk on me about it And I think they're real They're definitely real They came in an Apple box. Yeah, they're real. Oh, yeah, then they're definitely real. From the store, yeah.

That would be pretty crazy if Verizon was repackaging fake AirPods into AirPods boxes. Well, did you see the news from people talking about Amazon products this week? No. Where there's so little oversight and it's so huge that a ton of products that you think are name brand are actually just knockoffs and like it's gonna they said it's gonna like become a huge problem in the news soon like that they'll finally really start talking about it because everyone's getting so much fake shit that they think is but do they wrap it in like the real packaging yeah yeah that happens a

lot in the pro sports with like hockey sticks and cleats really yeah because like certain athletes like a specific kind of cleat that isn't like made anymore. And they obviously want to push like the new cleat or the new hockey stick. So they'll give them the old one, but then wrap it in the newest skin, the newest like decals. So it looks like the new one, but they're using different, different models. Yeah. Nike does that a lot with cleats.

There's a specific Nike cleat that NFL players love that was discontinued in like 2014, and a lot of NFL players just buy them off eBay now. Yeah. But Nike just wants to keep that new swagger, that new drip going. Did not know that. Yeah. Rown on Nike watch.

I would catch some Nikes in my mouth. I would showcase my... That's like the perfect size thing to... It is. I guess the sauce, though. Yeah, the sauce would be tricky. Yep. What was the point of the gnocchi?

Why did you guys want to get that? It's never had it. Really? Yeah. Oh, it's right up your alley. Mad fattening. Why? It's pretty much...

Is it like a pierogi, would you say? I don't know. Never had it. Oh, I love pierogis. What's the difference? Pierogis are stuffed. Oh, it's like those tortellini? No, they're not stuffed.

What? Gnocchi are solid. Yeah. Right. Oh. Oh, yeah. It's like pure bread. It's like thick.

It's like thick pasta. They're little balls. They're like marble-sized potato pasta balls. They're like the size of a ball bearing in a NASCAR. Oh. Do they have ball bearings in their car somewhere? Almost certainly. They do have tungsten.

They do? Yes, they do. You guys can tune in to Fox at 2.30 Eastern on February 19th for the Daytona 500. It's not the Daytona 400, not the Daytona 300 or 200. This is the Daytona 500, guys. It's the 75th anniversary of nascar daytona's 500 is considered the most prestigious and important race in nascar and has opened the nascar season every february since 1982 this year jimmy johnson will make his nascar cup series return since 2020 and travis

pastrana is attempting to qualify for the daytona 500 it's the Daytona 500, 219, 2.30 p.m. Eastern time. Whole squad's excited to go. The whole spider was talking about it today. That's right. Spider's going to be there. Large Alex Bennett. Yep. Jordan?

The whole big group's going. I think the main girls are both going. Okay. I think that. Odds are good. Odds are good. It's going. I think the main girls are both going. Okay. I think that. Odds are good. Odds are good. It's going to be a hoot. Again, not the Daytona 1 or 2 or 3 or 4.

It's the Daytona 500. I hope I have the track right. Daytona has a huge lake in the middle of it, and the world's longest jet ski ride was performed in that lake. I think Spider said he was going to fish in that lake, but he said it the coolest way ever. He was talking to Large, and Spider said, let's wet some line.

Oh, yeah. I've never heard that. Yeah. Wet some line. It's a big fishing term. Wet some line. That's cool. I know. It's cool. I need to learn more terms. Yeah. You can also say it when you're getting pussy. Wet some line.

Give that to Rudy. Get a line line in i say that a lot yeah toss my worm out there brandon how was your valentine's day uh uneventful we didn't do anything we had our valentine's dinner last week uh be valentine's dinner she did make me oh Oh, this bitch made me a full rack of lamb. What? I had rack of lamb and pistachio sauce and all kind of gourmet shit she made me when I got home. Life just doesn't make sense. No.

Full ass. I mean, it had like eight of those little sticks. Bones. You did that last night? I did. Doesn't sound uneventful. I thought you said you had five.

No, they're good. They're good. I got five. Oh. I thought we were going to pass them around. There's five out right now. Yeah, no, that's great. So I'm going to give them one.

Oh. Rowan, have your gnocchi. I'll... Let's get a little plate. Okay. You can't pass them around? Are they all the same thing? Yeah.

They're all the same thing. Then why are we going to pass them around? Because there's five of them and there's seven of us You're being a little sassy right now to be honest Yeah I am Please take this gnocchi Anybody else? Kyle? I'll go halfsies with somebody

Clemmer will eat this Yeah he will Would Clemmer eat a pop tart? Is that a stuffed food? Because it's processed, yeah. Yeah, that's a stuffed food. But hardly. That might be, we might be able to expose the cracks in his theory if he would eat a Pop-Tart.

What was his theory? He doesn't eat anything encased entirely in another food. Any stuffed food. Like a Hot Pocket or a burrito. Rowan, thank you. Come here. What? Come take half of this. Right, yeah. That eliminates so many foods. It another. Any stuffed food. Like a Hot Pocket or a burrito. Rowan, thank you. Come here. What? Come take half of this.

Right, yeah. That eliminates so many foods. It does. The best foods. Our pierogi. Raviolis. He doesn't eat raviolis, Ed. Not at all, he said.

I love ravioli. Oh, these are incredible. These taste like my grandma's. Just good pasta. Just good pasta? Oh, that's what it is. It's good. Get a real cheesy piece.

Get a real. Down. Get a real... Down that basil. We should go to our bagged pasta place this week. I don't think it exists anymore. What? Spaghetti in a bag closed? Spaghetti Westerns or whatever, I think it closed. Oh, no.

What do you mean spaghetti in a bag? It would serve it to you in a bag, and you'd eat it out of a bag. If it is open, I went there when it was closed. I went there when I was living at your dad's place. Oh, yeah. And I wanted to go, because it's only about 15 streets up. And I went up there and it was closed that week. I think it's closed forever.

That sucks. Yeah. It was the best bagged spaghetti in the city. And not expensive. You can't find that. It's hard to find around here. You guys ever seen a bag of milk? They have that in Quebec.

I just saw a tweet about this and I had no idea it was a thing. And it was like, the tweet was like, somebody come get your American. They cut the bag of milk wrong or something. And I was like, what is this? What is that? In Quebec, I'm sure they do it other places. They sell their milk in bags, which I assume is where the term bag of milk comes from. But yeah, you got to cut it like right at the bottom corner and then you put it in like

a receptacle and then it like shoots out the bottom. That seems like a lot of work. Yeah, that seems really. It's bizarre. When I was in Quebec, I was flabbergasted. Oh, I hate that. Yeah. Yeah, I don't like that.

Yeah. Well, can we see why milk comes in bags? I know the Africans do water in a bag. Yeah. You and I have the same TikTok. Yeah. I watch the people make them live in the factory, and I donate, and then the ones who flex their water bags.

Hell yeah. How do you do that? Flex your water bag. This guy with Jordans on in a village will pour a little bit out to flex it. He doesn't totally need it. They're brutal in the comments. What do they say? They always clown him. You barely put, you were

getting nervous after that first drop. That's their version of making it rain. I don't understand that. Pierre Trudeau. Bagged milk. Bizarre. Yeah. Bizarre.

Interesting. Wait, is this Trudeau a second Trudeau? Spelled differently. Yeah. Trudy X. This I like the gnocchi. I have a warm feeling. Very, very good.

I'm going to eat it all. I think five. I'm going to use a different amount. But thank you. It was too much. Yes, thank you. I know you just had to spend $6,000. Oh, yeah, Super Bowl tickets.

Yeah. Did you pay up already? Yeah. I'm not watching that fucking game again. Yeah. It feels terrible to even see the highlights. I can't watch a highlight of it. You still feel terrible?

Yeah, I can't watch a single highlight. I refuse to watch the Broncos-Seahawks any moment of it forever. I can't watch a highlight of it. You still feel terrible? Yeah, I can't watch a single highlight. I refuse to watch the Broncos-Seahawks any moment of it forever. You can't. You'll just have PTSD. That was a bloodbath. That was a terrible game. I forcibly put myself to sleep. I just like... Bloodbath.

I turned it off and just went to sleep. So, Roan, is a part of you hoping the Sixers don't make the finals just so you don't have that second place across the board? I want another chance. Okay. It wouldn't all be worth it, but it would be close to all being worth it if the Sixers win a championship.

In that moment, it would feel almost all worth it. Right, like we finally got one after all the... I feel like people would suck my dick and stuff like that. Yeah, and also Roan is one of those people that I think embraces pain. He's willing to go to a place of pain. I love it. Yeah. Because you understand that it means something for other people.

If you're going to go down, you want other people to at least revel in your loss. There's no joy without pain. Facts, dude. I bet there is, though. No. What is it? So are you saying heaven's going to suck? That's what I've always thought that, actually.

Some of your, does everyone go to heaven? No. Not you. I don't know why I'm telling you about this. Right. So can heaven be perfect if all your bros aren't there? Like if just like someone's missing, maybe they're perfect. I think heaven might suck.

I don't know. That's all them. KB fucked with you enough. KB might be your ticket to heaven because heaven wouldn't be heaven for KB without you. Right, exactly. And this whole cactus thing has me

short first ballot hell. First ballot unanimous hell. Satan's like, what? How did you come up with that? Creative ass demon. I bet you Satan is doing that now. She's doing that now. Satan is a woman to the worst.

Mussolini's girlfriend's catching cacti right now. Doing like an egg toss with cactuses in hell. Please. I saw a TikTok the other day of a priest that said his heart stopped and he went to hell. And he said that they were bumping Rihanna down there. A priest said that?

Wait, wait. I think I've seen that too. Yeah, he was saying that he went to hell and then he's like, yeah, they were just bumping Rihanna and I knew I was in a bad place. I was like,

that sounds like a kind of fucking rules, dude. Yeah. Yeah. I wanted to be a priest for a while. Not too late. Yeah. Yeah. I wanted to be a priest for a while. Not too late. Never have I ever.

Man of the frock. Yeah. I remember we were in, I don't know if our teacher was lying to us, but we were doing a tour of the church and she was like,

if you sit in that seat, that means you have to become a priest, which isn't true. And I plopped right down. Oh. It was comfy. Mm. So then what?

They just didn't hold up on that? Yeah, they didn't make me. Damn, dude. It's not like enlisting. They weren't about that? Yeah. I wish that there was, like, buds for priests. So how does that Catholic shit work?

Priests can't fuck? Oh, they do. They do. They certainly do. Like little boys. That's right, Sass. Yeah, they can't. And that probably could change a lot of it if they just let them do that.

So priests can't have kids? No. You want your priest to have kids? But I think a big part of it is priests are gay, and they're so Catholic they're afraid to be gay. They become a priest, so they have the loophole not to fuck. The beard of the Lord. Actually, that's 100 part of it is priests are gay, and they're so Catholic they're afraid to be gay. They become a priest, so they have the loophole. Easy beard. The beard of the Lord.

Actually, that's 100% what it is. Lied. Talked back to my parents. Oh, if you've had. That's it. You sure you haven't beat off my child? Impure thoughts. I talked back to my parents.

That was all the three. Lied. I lied, talked back to my parents, and had impure thoughts. I ran those three back. I feel like I got in a fight with my sister. Yeah. Yeah, I got in a fight with my brother. It was a big one that I would use.

Because you're afraid to even tell them anything because, yeah. They wouldn't let us even go to the screen. You had to go face to face. This guy that we- They guy that like guilted you they were like that you see at spaghetti dinners on a regular basis like i know what you know what you're thinking about is a wet dream out of bounds yeah yeah and that seems fucked up well there's a there's a line in the Bible. It's better to have your seed in a purchased whore than on the ground, right? Right. Remember they taught us that guys only wanted to have, guys only loved us.

They had a brought in speaker and the subject was chimichanga love. And it was like, boys only love you like they love a chimichanga. Like Taco Bell. And so if they have sex with you, it's only because they're looking at you like you're a chimichanga. That's why Clemmer doesn't love the bitches. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I still think about chimichanga love.

You told you that in church? Yeah. Yeah, at Sunday school. I had to go to Sunday school every Sunday of my life. Who here knows what a chimichanga is yeah yeah it was such a weird like comparison yeah did you guys have to go to summer church camps no thank god oh my god we went to a catholic school so we didn't have to oh i did and it'd be the like oh god and all the teens would all be crying and like whatever and then afterwards after one of the camps the counselors befriended some of the

teen girls in my group and we're like hey we're coming up from north carolina we got a hotel this weekend you want to come have some like zimas or like whatever the drink was at the time and i was so mad at my parents that they wouldn't let me go i was like you guys suck and that in hindsight not mad about it now yeah i am Yeah We just got a fresh case Of chimichangas Yeah Come chill Come up

Yeah Make love Like it didn't seem weird At the time It was like These cool guys are coming The seashell necklaces Catholic school

No I went to public school But so I had to do Sunday school And like church camps Every Sunday Did you go to a Catholic school No Interesting I did

I went to a catholic school did yeah but you're not catholic no so you were in there frauded you guys ever have the the cool like born again virgin speakers yes they were just for 30 minutes they would just flex about how much they used to fuck yeah now they're better now guys it was so fucking good it felt so good would only do it i was doing it so much when i was at my worst when i was at rock bottom i was Now they're better now. Guys, it felt so fucking good. It felt so good. I was doing it so much. When I was at my worst, when I was at rock bottom, I was fucking almost every day. Now I'm holding out.

Yeah. And I'm so much more clear-minded. I have cool jeans now. And a V-neck. Yeah. Before? Yeah, always V-necks. Always V-necks, dude.

Never deep. It was like a shallow V. No, shallow V-necks. Always V-necks, dude. Never deep. It was like a shallow V. Oh, shallow V, shallow V. And then like, they had like that bracelet that's like kind of beaded bracelet. A lot of beaded,

the shell neck was so huge. And they would flirt with the girls afterwards. Oh yeah, and they'd probably fuck them. Yeah. Oh yeah, they'd flirt with the girls

afterwards like, man, if you caught me five years ago, it would have been fucking curtains. I would have had you fucking screamed. Young life is... I would have called fucking curtains. I would have had you fucking scream.

I would have called National Guard. You're so lucky I'm born again. You'd be up against the wall right now, feeling things you've never fucking heard. That's essentially what they were doing. You're so lucky. We would have had to build another ark for that. You're exactly my type.

Anyways, 40 Hail Marys. anyways uh 40 hail marys yeah yeah spit these bars from god yeah the old testament is fucking dope you think whoever ghost wrote because obviously god wrote the hail mary but i think whoever like ghost wrote it if you felt pretty good about themselves for sure oh absolutely yeah that i'd be much more into heaven if you got to meet god's ghost writer yeah like if you found out who was behind the bars yeah quentin miller yeah quentin miller you see the oldest known old testament that still exists is on sale at like sotheby's this week and it's going for like 50 million dollars or something that's a grail dude yeah that's. Yeah, that's pretty good price. It should be more.

That's a pretty good price. But it's like 1,100 years old or something like that. What's the Shroud of Turin up to? Oh, man, yeah, he's been chilling. I think it's in Lock and Key still. What's the one with Mary's face on it? Is that it? That's it.

It has Jesus' face on it. Yeah, Mary Magdalene wiped his face. Yeah. Yeah. Not related at all. It has Jesus' face on it. Yeah, Mary Magdalene wiped his face. Not related at all. I got to tell a Rudy story from the Super Bowl house. Oh, God. What?

Rudy goes up to Dave in the house, and Rudy gave him a T-shirt. T-shirt, sweatshirt? T-shirt. T-shirt. He's like, happy Hanukkah. And Dave thought he was joking, but it was. Rudy bought it for him for Hanukkah. Yeah, it was a little late. It was very, very awkward. Dave was like happy Hanukkah and Dave thought he was joking but it was Rudy bought it for him for Hanukkah yeah it was a little late it was very very awkward Dave was like Hanukkah he thought like Rudy was making a joke to him I think no and I was like no I just think I took forever to send it I always get just don't say happy Hanukkah well what was it it was a Larry Bird like vintage

t-shirt oh yeah I just wore that right yeah he did wear it which made me feel a lot better about myself i was standing right there and i said yeah nick i wish nick wasn't in the airspace but yeah he was wincing in the background and then i like awkwardly like just paced around the like island and pretending i had something else to do it was not a clean landing that house was weird as far as like you just kind of milled about. There was nowhere to... Couldn't be comfy. Yeah, you couldn't just have a conversation with your bros or something. I went to the basement a lot. No one was in the basement.

The basement was nice, dude. It did smell like baby diapers, though. Other than that, though. Yeah, other than that. Well, they had a playpen next to the couch. The whole setup of that house was bizarre. Yeah. It was no zoning. Sass would have loved it, probably. There was a pool table.

We didn't play enough. It looks like you guys were using it as a storage unit. We put our batteries. There was an incredible pool table and nobody played on it. We didn't play volleyball? We did not play volleyball. There was a beach volleyball court out there?

There was Gillis Norman Kreischer. They were looking for a fourth for pool, and we were like, nah, man, we don't have anybody here that would do that with you. Sorry, boys. Francis was here. Yeah. You Francis. That sounds fun.

Well, pickleball just took over. Yeah, that was the jam. I enjoyed that. Is this room big enough if you took the chairs out that it could be a pickleball court or no? No. Okay. Pickle squash, maybe like a little pickle off the wall. I think this room would be one side. One side of a pickleball court.

Yeah. Yeah, if we get more glass, we could make this into racquetball or squash. I went to the racquetball world championships. They held it at Grand Central. Did you see Sudsy? You saw Sudsy there? Probably, I guess. Sudsy Monchik.

I don't know. But it was like super intense and the fans were really into it. It was like a whole scene. A lot of Latinas. Yes. Plugging that thing around. It's like super impressive. Where was it?

it was in Grand Central and I was single living in Queens I saw it and I was like I want to see what that's all about so I went you made videos from that? did I? I probably did I think I blogged it

I think I went and was like back when I used to do stuff. There's a lot of cool ass shit to do in New York. I always think like nobody does New York content here. I know. Maybe I'll start doing New York content. Just stop traveling. I wanted to do the dive bar thing, but I feel like that's already been done.

Who gives a fuck if things have already been done? We're constantly flying to other cities. Yeah. Everything's flying. There's so much right here. And it's like, yeah, no one covers shit. Our school versus America could have been on this street. Yeah, yes.

It could have been. I wrote down the convention center, all the crazy conventions that go through. Because I used to work at the Philly Convention Center. And I worked a proctology convention of all butt doctors once. The craziest shit comes through. And anybody really can go to these things. So I was like, what if I started covering the convention center beat?

There's a dog, like a World of Breeds show coming up with all dogs, and those people are nuts. That was last week I went. Oh, it was? Did you go? You got to pet every dog breed. Oh, that's great. See, I missed it. What was the best pet? Akita. Ah, very soft.

Nice. That's Akita. It's like a snow dog. They're vicious. Yeah, I went to the Westminster two years ago or something like that, and those people are, I mean, very intense. KB was looking at it. Please. Yeah, guys, I've been just picking at this.

We're smashing. We're eating over here. I'm afraid if I take my braces out, no one's going to want to touch the knock. I'm squeezing the last little bit. No, Kate, please. Out of my over here. I'm afraid if I take my braces out, no one's going to want to touch the knock. I'm squeezing the last little bit of juice. No, Kate, please. Out of my zan. I know. I don't want to.

I'm waiting for this. Can I see that Akita again? I enjoyed that. There he is. Oh, look at him. Young Thug has an Akita. They're big. Wait, you really went, Nick?

Yeah. Oh, that's great. He looks like a blanket. I'm a rash. Yeah, it's a nice looking dog. I went to Comic-Con there at the convention center. It was dope. Yeah. So you went and you didn't make went to Comic Con there at the convention center. It was dope.

Yeah. So you went and you didn't make any content? I'm allowed to do things. Should I tell Dave that? I don't think Dave will like that. Chill, chill. Do you have your phone with you? You can make anything.

If you just have your phone, you can... The phone is the most powerful fucking tool that we have. It's true. Everyone rigged said that in the middle of the company meeting. I got something to say. Yeah, I do. I do, yeah. The phone is the most powerful

fucking weapon in our toolbox. Yeah. Everyone in the crowd. Jesus Christ, dude. Everyone in the crowd celebrated like it was like a window dunk. Everyone was like,

fuck yes! We're holding each other back. Yeah. I just was like looking at mine. Holy shit, he's right. And he is right. Fasoli's like, he's got fake AirPods, dude. Yeah.

That man's got whack Apple products. Should we spin the wheel really quick? We should spin the wheel really quick. We have one more ad, too. We got three today, but I already threw my paper. All right, Rowan, I'm going to try the gnocchi now that my zen is done. You haven't made an airplane yet. Let's go.

Try the gnocchi. Oh, shit. Just spin it. Wait, are we spinning or doing the ad first? I was spinning. We'll probably just spin. Okay. Then we're going to do the ad.

I'm dry. I'm dry. Do the ad first? I was spinning. We'll probably just spin. Okay. Then we're going to do the ad. I'm dry. I'm dry. Do the ad. You know what's... Hey, you have some yucky. I'll do this ad. Okay, thank you. I was like, you know what's not dry?

You know what's really wet? The Game Time app. The Game Time app. I don't know. Okay. The exclusive ticketing partner of Barstool Sports. Created by fans for fans, Game Time is the ticketing app that makes it easier than ever to score last-minute deals on tickets to sports, concerts, and shows. And they guarantee the lowest price.

They cracked the code on how to score deals on last-minute tickets. It's impossible. It is possible with the GameTime app. The biggest last-minute price drops can be found on the seats that you thought you could never buy. I've used it for all kinds never buy. I've used it for all kinds of stuff. I've used it for games, football games, but that's done now. So now I'm using it for basketball games. And you can too, believe it or not. The purchase process takes two taps, 10 seconds. You buy your tickets. They're delivered directly to your phone. No printer

needed. The app also allows you to easily share tickets with your friends via text so you can get to the game seamlessly. Skip the hassle, enjoy the moment, download GameTime, or go to the website, enter your email, and redeem code YAK for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. GameTime. It's always GameTime on the GameTime app.

Yep. What are you guys going to do now that football's over? Nothing. I might go house hunting in chicago this weekend you might might i haven't decided i well just found out yesterday we have a four-day weekend what area are you looking at so there's a line from like naperville up to like crystal lake oh you would love buffalo grove really yes or long grove isn't buffalo grove like really nice how many groves are there uh there's a decent amount but those are the main grows i think you should be you can get some good ass land out there have a little spread some horses so i the one

house i've zeroed in on is an hour and a half out of the city okay is it bad so uh it's northwest um in a very small town that i can't even remember right now. But it's – El Met? No. It's not that far out. Not that far out. Ringwood. Ringwood?

But anyway, I've looked at that, and it's a long way out. But I kind of want the – When I see the house, I won't dox it. I kind of want the property. When I see the house? Rome's going to buy it. Rome's going to buy it. No, I don't want to say that.

I don't want to say now because – I'm sorry. Did I buy your house? I'm already want to say that. I don't want to say now because... I'm sorry, did I buy your house? I'm already going to hell. I don't think you're going to hell, Ron. It's okay. You'd weasel your way out of it. Yeah.

Didn't go to hell, didn't go to Iran. Oh, wow. I forgot all about that. There's an Oki's fire. Oh, wow. I forgot all about that. Hey, Nick. There's no keys fired. Let me see. Damn. Flip the camera. Don't make it a thing.

Flip the phone. Whoa. Whoa. Shit. Damn. You guys have a fucking war. Because that'll give it away't say it Cause that'll That'll give it away

There's something That would give it away Yeah And I know what it is now What could it be Sass made enough sound Did I Yeah

I mean I'm sure You could say it This is something That only that house Would have I have no idea What you were about to say I know

Not It would give it away I don't think it would Give it away A skate park More or less common. Something like that. Brandon, you want to say it?

I don't know what he was about to say. What does the property have? Swimming pool. What does it have next to the swimming pool? A waterfall? But a water slide. But that's pretty common with these pools out there I've seen. Brandon's living in the blank check house.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, water slides are actually pretty common. Everyone's got a water slide these days. Oh, this? Do you guys like the kids with the water slides? Those were never good water slides. No, they're always rickety.

I feel like the system that made the water go down, it was always broken, so you always were like... Yeah, residential water slides just don't do it. You need commercial grade. Yeah. Yeah, I want to go see this one. The water slide where the mini golf was at.

What was it from? What movie? Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure? Yeah, it was. That looked like an elite water slide. I wanted to go to that water park so bad. God damn it, what did they call it on the show? I haven't been to a water park in a while. Waterloo?

No. Waterloo. Right? Because that's where Napoleon went. Mm-hmm. I used to go to Water Country growing up in New Hampshire. I went to Fun Country. Water Country, Water Country.

Water Country. That's the theme song? Yeah. I don't even know if it's still open. It might be closed. Ours was called the Slip and Dip. The Water Whiz, too. That's not a good name.

No. That's just piss. The one wasn't as good as Water Country, though. It was way smaller. Water Country, Water Country, let's all have some fun. No, there's no all in there. Let's have some fun. Let's have some fun.

Some of us have fun. Yeah. It's got to still be open. We had Waterworld. I think it was like the biggest water park in New England. Out of like three. There's a water... If you move to Highland Park, the Deerfield area, there's a really nice water park over there.

I'm going to move somewhere. Oh, yeah. It's still open. You're not going. I don't know why I was about to ask. Waterworld is what we had. Waterworld was lit. They had a wave pool there that was maybe

one of the most dangerous places in the world all wave pools are we had Sandcastle next to us and it was more there was more bandages than water wave pools are

are insane they're nuts remember I feel like back in the day too all the wave pools had like spackle on the ground instead of

and it would like tear up your feet and your davings shit like that it It was like the, it was almost like the popcorn. Yeah. But on the ground, it was supposed to keep you from like slipping.

But instead at the end of the day, your feet. And I remember all my speedos would be like see-through by the end of the day from like, your feet get fucking obliterated. Fried Oreos floating around. Oh yeah. People get really feral at water parks.

I feel like they just like let the worst of themselves. Water parks are knocker. They're not that simulations of not like natural disasters. parks. I feel like they just let the worst of themselves. Water parks are not that fun. They're simulations of natural disasters. Yeah. I mean, when you're waiting in line and you're soaking wet and you're freezing, and you just got to wait on the hard metal ladders. God forbid you have to poop.

Oh, I always had to shit in water parks. It's always a loud shit when you get out. Yeah. Your ass. I don't know if it's your wet cheeks, man. It's shit loud. It's always like really loud. You are right, though.

They would simulate like natural disasters. The wave pool at Waterworld, they changed it because it was so dangerous. They used to have every 15 minutes a legitimate seven foot wave come through. And there would be like hundreds of people in there and about half of them would rent tubes and if you had an inner tube you could ride it. So then there would just be an army of people that didn't have inner tubes that you would just mow down.

Yeah, just latching on it was just like pulling people under to survive. Yeah, it was... Clawing people. And when the wave would come you would hear from across the park just screams. Yeah. It was insane. Yeah.

That was the alarm. That was a good ass sound effect. What was that? That was me. Yeah, that's exactly how it sounded. Police Academy ass, Nick. We even nailed the part where it starts off slow. Yeah, I feel like I'm there.

That was sick. Sound effects. Thanks, man. Oh, man, I do like water parks. I mean, when we go to the American Dream Mall, that's part of it. If there wasn't lines, it would make it so much better.

Coolest place ever. If we can weasel our way into that over there. You ever go to the one in Rio Grande down the shore? I've been to Wildwood Pier. I've been to those water parks. But it's actually in Rio Grande, I think. Is that what they call it?

I don't know, but it's Wildwood, something Wildwood. Oh, is it on the pier? Yeah. Okay, then I'm thinking of a different one. A lot of Band-Aids.

Those super steep slides that suck your bathing suit right up your ass. Holding beach pails filled with the worst soft-serve ice cream. Yes. Turkey leg. Yep.

Anybody want to go to Medieval Times this weekend with me? I live right next to it. I would totally go. Let's do it. Okay. No kids allowed. No kids allowed. That's fine. Joey Langone's going. What? No way. Joey Langone is the red knight there.

I'm not joking. Gave me a rose last time. All the knights went on strike. They formed a union, the first ever union of knights. I follow them on Instagram. It wasn't the first ever union. That's true. This bitch forgot about the round table.

What about Galahad? That's embarrassing. That's on me. Maybe the second. They're back at it. They're back at it. They're back at it. Kate, I don't know why I could see you have dated a knight from medieval times.

I would. Probably totally would. Yeah. Let's do it. Okay. Yeah. I would be totally down. Rudy? I'll get a quad.

Even the listeners, come. Yeah. Come to medieval times. Sell it out. I don't know what it is. You've never been to Medieval Times? Renaissance Fair? It's like a restaurant, but in the middle they joust.

Oh shit. You think the knights are cocky about it? Yes. I follow them. And I follow a bunch of the knights from Medieval Times and that's, yes. Some of them come out like Ray Lewis used to. Like smoke machines. Spitting into the air.

Spitting mead. They always like creepily give a rose to like, we went on first school trips, like give a rose to like one of the girls in our class. Oh, really? Yeah. It's like they'd win it for them. My first weekend when I went to Denver, we were like a bunch of the older guys did this like tradition of the Renaissance Fair.

And since I was like the new freshman, they're like, you're DDing. And I was just so happy to be like included. So I was like, I'm down. I'm good. And they had this whole thing planned where like every time they walk by a beer stand, they have to drink like a full beer. And there's beer stands every 20 feet. And it was like a they like knew a guy that worked there that ran the kegs.

And it's like this internal like secret menu challenge where it's where you have to go the whole time without missing a single beer. And they had a map that they gave you, so you would just bounce to every single beer vendor and have a beer at every single one they were obliterated. Sounds awesome. And you had a DCM. Dude, and boobies are out. Titties are out?

At the Renaissance Fair. Oh, of course. Renaissance Fair is one of the—I went to the Texas one. I know I'm eating into the mic. It was one of the horniest places I've ever been. Yeah, they push up the boobs to the solar system. Yeah. They have them sitting up there.

Corset or corsage? Corsage? Corset, I believe. Corset. Yeah, a corset, I believe. A bustier. Yeah. Got the titties out.

It was a good era for titty. That was like crazy technology that they thought of that. Yeah. That's like polio. Yeah, that is one of the best of all time. One of the horniest places you've ever been. You were at a blowjob festival. That is true.

That was nuts. I don't know if that would be horny or you're just getting sucked out of obligation. Were they invisibly pleasured? Yeah. They were into it. I take it back. They were. You've got to be horny.

That's got to be the horniest place. Yeah, no, that was. Were you pregnant at the time? Yeah, like visibly, like very. In hindsight, yeah. Yeah, not my best. Now, is there a crowd forming around them in a circle formation, and they're in the middle getting sucked? Yeah.

It's like a Fibonacci sequence around that. That's so unsettling probably. They actually had, like, you know, I don't know if you're ever at an event, and they're like, okay, oldest people get to go in the food line first, whatever, because it was for veterans. They're like, all right, if you have a combat action ribbon and you serve more than however many years, you're the first to get sucked. They have this whole system for who got sucked. Chefs, don't even try.

Get to the back. Yeah, yeah. If you're a pogue, if you're in infantry, you're getting sucked last. That's great. You went to this? Yes. What type of facial expression would they put on? That guy was actually coming in that moment.

That guy was actually coming. Yeah moment um that guy was actually coming yeah the video we couldn't come on we couldn't show it but the video yeah he's like actually he's the one getting sucked off right there and he's like actually in the hurley too yeah and pat was my cameraman this guy this fucking he's somewhere right now. Does he know that this is us? Someone, one of our listeners is one degree away from that man. Jesus Christ. I don't know. I couldn't believe all the women that were in the background of that picture. There was a, well, here's the thing.

There's Mike Busey, the Sausage Cast guy. Like all the guns in the back. You pay to belong to that house. It's like a country club. So guys in the area will pay a certain amount a month to have access to certain special nights there and to events. And there's like basketball courts and all this stuff there. And then in the end, I went into a part of a house that I don't think I was supposed to, to use the bathroom. And it was crammed full of bunk beds and girls.

Oh, no. And I was like, are you guys okay? Were they? They said they're like, yeah like yeah yeah so i'm sure they're fine we need to break them out like musa but i think we need to get the fucking commandos in this bitch auto operation save the whores no this was just in the middle of covet as well yeah yeah yep yep took a little yeah in there and there's just pregnant there's just dudes getting sucked off everywhere. Yeah. We took a break. There was boxing going on.

So Pat and I took a break because I was hungry and I was tired to go eat. And so this whole house was empty while everyone was watching the fighting. So we just sat there eating barbecue while all the TVs played like hardcore porn. Yeah, it was just porn on the TV. Oh, no. Was that okay? Yeah, there was actual porn on the television. You couldn't really see anything.

Okay, good. Sorry. I think you could see butthole. A little bit. A tiny, a one second. A one spoke. A one spoke. I'm curious, what was the soundtrack like? There was

a DJ playing while everyone, in the room while everyone was getting sucked off. It was patriotic, like Lee Greenwood. That guy was coming while the Proud to Be an American was climaxing at the same time. It was oneotic. Like Lee Greenwood, that guy was coming while like the Proud to be an American was like climaxing at the same time. It was one of the most like people were singing along

while they were jerking off because everyone was like jerking off waiting for their turn. Oh, really? Oh, yeah. Everybody. Why were you there?

I know. Because Zero Plug 30, it was specifically a Veterans Day event where she was blowing veterans. So there's just dudes. So you're just there. There's just dudes just jerking off, getting blown everywhere.

Porn playing on all the TVs. Jenny Jizz is her name. She still texts us. And she's like, how's the baby? And her husband's like Mike the cum artist or something. Yeah, I remember him. And every time they're in New York, they're like, if you need us to pop by on the act. I'm like, oh my goodness, by all means.

The cum artist. The cum artist. I hope he was getting sucked off or something like that on the side. No, he loves watching. And so this was his... A little bit too much watching, though. That's a lot to watch. A little bit too much watching.

Yeah. A job like 33, he's got to be like, this is a little much. Yeah. I love her. Yeah. I love my baby they like have kids and grandkids and they're like yeah our kids are fine with it they don't care at all i bet they do they definitely don't know the level yeah i bet they care they may not know

the gravity of the situation right definitely we're hosting an event for veterans tonight that's all they get yeah in hindsight why is mom's last name Jizz? What does free blowjobs mean? And in the end, it turned into a free-for-all because nobody could wait anymore. What do you mean? What do you mean nobody could wait anymore? Yeah, what does that mean? And Kate, you really just tapered off there. Yeah.

What does free-for-all mean? What's a free-for-all mean, Kate? What does that mean? No, everybody just started coming everywhere. Yeah. So everyone starts free for all me. What's a free for all me in case all the dudes start fucking? No, everybody just started coming everywhere. Oh my God.

That's gotta be the worst post-nut. I'm like sweating. Ugh. Wait, but like, hey, were you like,

were you dodging? I was stood up on a counter. I was on the counter with the buffet foods. You took it, you took it. I had to get it.

It was a buffet? The barbecue. Yes. It was Carolina style, the white sauce. Yes, there was people getting sloppy joes. Yeah, I bet. In hindsight, I don't think about it often. You come in that situation, you go to the buffet, you eat,

or do you think you just got to leave right away? People were standing there eating pulled pork sandwiches while this was all like sticky fingers or you know on this and afterwards pat and i were like we probably stayed in that room too long like we didn't need whoever had to go through the footage yeah we were like we're sorry that was probably smitty he had experience from his old job. Yeah, we did. We didn't probably have to do all that. That was a little much. Oh, my God. But just like running out, like dodging like loads,

like it's a fucking bombing from an enemy force. Jumping rope like it's double-dodged. Yeah, it was. And she, we interviewed her after, and she was like a glazed donut. She was, I know. She like in good spirit? None of the guys, I thought,

none of these guys are going to want to talk to me. None of them cared. They're like, yeah, I heard about this on the radio today. It came on over. Like people like did not care. Was she checking? What do you mean? If they were military?

Veterans. I think to get into the event, you had to prove, to get onto the compound, you had to like show your, like, like my ID says veteran on it. So I think you had to like prove it. Rowan's trying to test the validity of it. i think you had to like prove it roan's trying to test the validity of it yeah i was gonna try to pull up with a limp no he's gonna pull up with a receipt from bennegan's yeah exactly i got 15 off why would they give me the 15 off i'm not a veteran yeah were they checking as well for like any sort of virus nope it was It was... That's gross.

If you're going last or close to last, you gotta have gotten something. You get something. Everybody gets something. The garbage men have to hate picking up the trash from that house the next day. Who cleans the floor? Yeah. Who cleans the floor?

That dude from the ocean. Yeah, definitely getting... Yeah, it's that guy from the ocean. A little scuba suit. Chipping off fucking glazed jizz. Yeah, he's praying for high tide.

Yeah, you take a hammer and chisel in the next day. So you just went to an orgy. Yeah, yep, that's what it was. And this guy... They probably should schedule it when they know

a hurricane's coming. This dude has to get resuscitated after every shift. Every single shift. It could be worse. Every now and then he'll message me and be like, can you blog me? I did this thing. And the latest one, this was a while ago now. Is it the cum artist that will?

No, like the guy who owns that house. He got in a helicopter that went over the Hollywood sign and he pooped on the Hollywood sign. I was like, yeah, of course I'll fuck it. That's actually pretty fucking funny. Yeah. Yeah. It was great. He just does awesome shit all the time.

He just does great shit all the time. And his compound was like- What's his name? Mike Busey. Shout out to him. He sounds like a legend. There's musicians like, when they first get their start, a lot of musicians go through there.

That, that, that's the- Like he's associated with, if you look it up, like I can't think of any other artists right now, but like some rappers and some artists who've gone on to be pretty big

kind of like got their start performing at his... Gotta be like Kid Rock or something like that. He had festivals and stuff too. Yeah. Yes, I'm pretty sure. Ellie Goulding got her start there.

Yeah, I think so. Definitely. Yeah. Yeah, very interesting guy. Start of the ride. Ellie Goulding was the best. She is. I was thinking about her interesting guy. I'm sure. Ellie Goulding was the best. She is. I was thinking about her last night.

I was thinking, where'd she go? Speaking of Ellie Goulding, I think Skrillex has an album coming out. He's been in Lane & Wade for a while. He just announced he's playing MSG on Saturday. What? Three minutes. It's gone.

Oh, no. I would have loved to go go i would fucking love that maybe game time could hook us up that would be pretty cool i didn't realize i listened to that theo von with dave and that they were like one of the first ones of the blackout tours to do like techno nights like techno concerts and who they said they paid diplo like three thousand dollars or something like he was like brand new at the time and they barely had to pay him like anything really and yeah so like the blackout doors like one of the first

first what like what are these right like tech like I don't know what you call them shows yeah been going on I mean like there's like the 90s but I mean I okay fair enough yeah is that also same as how Barstool invented the internet?

Yeah. Okay. You hear this? We invented raves? Okay. It's possible. I don't know about that. I don't know if we were the first one to do that.

I may be misunderstood. Maybe in the Northeast. I don't think you're misunderstood. I think Dave just claimed that. He just says it as if it's fact. I was like, oh, wow. Like music used to be played on instruments until we came around. Hey, you've been a very good host.

This has been a real treat. I really enjoyed this. I'm glad. Oh, Big Cat sent us pictures from the TWA hotel. I want to go so bad. And it looks amazing. And then Quig sent the photo. I didn't realize because he went to watch the planes

and it was so cold when he went that his entire window to his room was iced over and he couldn't see. He paid $1,000, couldn't even see the planes. I would have complained if I was him. I'm also an absolute heathen. KB, I also got you that bowl bowl jersey, bro. Why did I get you that?

I think I said I wanted it. Yeah, thank you. It was for your birthday? Yeah. Bro, you're not a bad guy. No. But you do have to give $100 to a homeless person and film it. Okay.

Why don't you do it right now? I'll do it today. And film it? Yeah. And we watch it on the Yak? Fuck yeah, I'll do it. Okay. Yeah, that is uncomfortable.

I was talking with Sass about that yesterday, having to give $100 to a homeless person. I might accidentally get some drugs. You're just like, oh, yeah, here. You can't take drugs. Look at that. Oh, that's where that scene is filmed in Catch Me If You Can, I think. I've seen.

That looks familiar. The carpet's different in Catch Me If You Can. Yeah, I think this is just more modeled after older. This is newer. Yeah. Yeah. It was sweeter then. That is sweeter.

That is better than what we have going on right now. God, that's fucking dope, dude. Yeah. What do they call those living rooms? Ouches? Maybe he'll make the Chicago office like that. I wouldn't be mad. 70s style?

Nice little TWA, 70s style. All right, guys, the vibe we're going for is Jetsons. I would be, oh my God, yeah. Who's designing the Chicago office? What's his name? The Falling Waters guy's son. I was just the... Frank Lloyd Wright. Frank Lloyd Wright's son. That's dope, because there's a just the Frank Lloyd Wright.

Frank Lloyd Wright's son. That's dope because there's a lot of Frank Lloyd Wright houses in the Chicago area. So that'll be cool.

Yeah. Isn't the waterfall one in Minnesota? It's in Pennsylvania. I think I thought it was in Minnesota because in one of the old NBA 2K

games if you played for the Timberwolves house. Maybe there's just another Frank Lloyd Wright out there. Possibly. But the cut screen played for the Timberwolves. Maybe there's just another Frank Lloyd Wright out there. Possibly. But the cut screen for the Timberwolves was the Frank Lloyd Wright House.

And I always as a kid was like, that's fucking sick. So I just thought it was in Minnesota. Frank Lloyd Wright House, when you go, it's musty. It's a little musty. It's a lot of water. I did a tour of the one in Arizona, Taliesin West, when I was super hungover once. I was like three hours

in the hot sun and there's like a great swimming pool but you can't go in it and it was musty a lot of mothball smell what are the tenets of his architecture style uh you can't move the furniture it's always in the wall but like what's his style oh it's got to blend with the earth yeah it's got to like kind of blend with the landscape and also he never paid taxes i don't think and also he had like 50 something cars that were all the same color red that he patented he patented a color yeah it's like frank lloyd right like a like a desert red it's a famous color red's a blue blood when it comes to colors oh yeah i was hung over those notes i remember from the tour. I could be way wrong.

Wait, can I see the Frank Lloyd Wright red? Something about him having like 50 different cars and they're all the exact same color. Red. He would have fucked with the Hobbits, heavy. Yeah. They build that thing right into the earth. There was a specific... I'm trying to go to the Shire next summer.

Oh, dude, can I come? No. Where is it? Nah, man, you're not allowed. It's in New Zealand. I'll go to Mordor. Fine, man. Where's that?

Your poisonous gases. Yeah, but I'll look so much cooler. Here's a bunch of his cars. They're all that same. Yeah, that's fucking... How rich was he when he died? He didn't pay taxes. Did he have any of the cars at the Arizona house?

I don't remember, but yeah, they're all that like desert-y. I don't know. I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. Seems like you know exactly what you're talking about. You just described it perfectly. Described something and then he pulled up pictures of exactly what you were saying. Also, he held like a college there on that he had like a ton of land and the final thesis was that they each had to build a tiny house just he would give

them like a section of land and be like all right here's a shovel build a house or like some shit like that they could only use like natural materials but you could walk around and see like all these old students like houses and shit which was good it was cool it was just like funky and cool oh a dude in the ph the Philippines would have wiped that competition. That guy's fake. Who builds the hot tubs and stuff? He's fake. He got busted.

He had caterpillar tracks. Front loader tracks shown. That's like when Bear Grylls used a helitool. Are you thinking of this guy? Yes. YouTube guy?

Yes, he always has hot pools and moats. What he does is still impressive. He has an entire team of people. That doesn't bother me. Didn't bother me with Bear Grylls either. Yeah, I don't care. Yeah, I don't. And he's been just laying, he pollutes so much of that forest.

He doesn't take anything apart or do anything. It just all faces away. As long as the hot lumberjack guy is still legit. I think he's still legit. That's another blue-collar job that I am into. Lumberjacks? Oh, yeah. Yep.

Cutting wood. Chopping a tree. Not sawing it, but chopping a tree. Have you seen the hot lumberjack guy? No. Oh, he's the hottest. Everything he does is so intentional. He he uses an axe he knows what he's doing i don't even ball he's like i'm gonna have to rip this one oh fuck yeah it's it's fucking tight yeah that is just it's noted all the comments are just like yeah please fuck me please fuck me oh shit well have

you seen the like the wood chopping competitions there's like an olympics of wood yeah and they gotta like chop a rope and then a log and then a thing. I found the goofiest Olympics. It's the Scottish people. They just try to throw poles. Oh, like the big telephone poles? Yeah. Telephone poles. Oh, this is the hot lumberjack guy. He loves it.

Oh wait, this guy's making fun of him, I think. Oh, hot lumber lady. He gets clowned a lot. He should. He's very intentional. Whoa, he's very intentional, just like... Whoa! That's still cool. We gotta get him ripping one. That's still cool.

We gotta get him ripping one. Oh, he's a loser. Fuck. This guy's a fucking loser. He knows exactly what he's doing. Oh, a little rain. Yeah. Bradley Thor.

Yeah. Oh! What's to the left of you, bro? Why are you looking left? Oh, you monster. Getting that nice and dry. Oh, wait a minute. How about this?

Oh, he'll get it. Don't you worry. This is a little embarrassing. Oh, he's always like this. This is what girls like. That log is shaped like a booty. A lot of good tennis sounds. A lot of gasping.

Maybe he was a little ambitious. Yeah, what is this one? I've never seen one like this. I think he's saying no matter how big that thing is, he's going to split it. It looks like he's doing no progress. Can't stop until he splits it now. Wait a minute. Oh, yeah.

He's drying it off. So that was for the fellas. That was for his male fans right there. Okay. Eating off the wood. This is his entire content, though. I mean, he would go nuts. Louis is filming it.

Uh-oh. He's filming this. His wife. Oh, is that for real Uh-oh. He's filming this. His wife. Oh, is that for real? Is that what's happening? He's going to rip at the hands. Here we go. Oh.

Bradley. Damn. Do you think they have sex immediately after this? They have to. Yeah, that energy's got to go. He definitely is toxically mean to her. Oh, for sure. Absolutely.

Is that a job? There has to be a better tool. Right. Yeah, there's just a million different types of saws. Is that what he does for a living? What is that? He splits logs. Splits logs.

Damn. Rail splitter. That's what they used to call it. Abraham Lincoln. The old rail splitter. Really? That's what they call it. Splitting beams.

When your balls are on either side of your... What's it called? Splitting beans, right? I've never heard that in my life. I've been in the game for a while. Where'd you hear that? I've been in the ball game for a while. I was in the ball game for a while.

This was before you were born. It's just called a division sign. Yeah, I don't know. I guess it would be. I've heard splitting beans. Where did Brandon go? Yeah, I don't know. That's a great question.

Yeah. He didn't even attempt to let us know. No. I thought he was going to get Chick-fil-A, and then I realized he just ate gnocchi, but he'll probably also... Not there. Well, tomorrow's the last Yak of the Week

before a long weekend for everybody. Holy shit, yeah. Tomorrow's Thursday? Yeah. We've Before a long weekend for everybody Tomorrow's Thursday We've got a surprise day off tomorrow We have off Monday That's going to be awesome I know part of me wants to go somewhere fun At the last second Go to Montauk, go to the beach

What are you going to do Ron? Nothing Is it going to be warm here? Medieval times. I really would love to go to medieval times. That's a thing. I for sure want to go. Zoo crew?

Jay? If anybody wants to meet us at the zoo. Oh, it's going to be a nice weekend. I love that zoo. I'm probably going to the zoo on Sunday if you want to go. Zoo in medieval times. Is there anything new there? Your kid just has it memorized.

No, yeah, we just, same shit. Or actually, no, a new Amazing Asia exhibit. Amazing what? Amazing Asia. So what does that include? A red panda and a cloud leopard. Oh, yeah. Those are some marquee.

Cloud leopard's his favorite? Yeah. The red panda is very present, though. When I was there, he was making the noises of every animal we passed pretty well. Nice. Smart kid. How about those fucking snakes that fell out the ceiling? Oh, fuck that.

Hell no. What? Fuck that. I did not want to see that. It's the worst. I want to see it. It's the worst. It's viral all over the... It's not like small snakes. No, big snakes. It's like massive snakes. Is it just one snake? It looks like a's not like small snakes. No, big snakes. Is it just one snake? It looks like a fucking tangle of snakes.

Are they fighting? I can't even watch. There's its tail. It's just a little snake tail. Does anyone know the premise of it? Oh! That's pretty bad. How are they still there?

I fuck with snakes a lot more than spiders, though. If those were spiders... Not me, not me, dude. Those can kill you. Would have blown that house up. Good God. Kate was not with that. No, I don't like...

I'm not... Yeah. Spiders are way worse than snakes for me. A room of 300 veterans beating off is cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Little snakes trying to hide. No, not my. Because then you picture them in your home.

So big. Slithering around. Yeah, they're not. Unless you move to Burma, I think you'll be good. Yeah. Well, you never know what weird neighbor, when you live in an apartment, has like the snake that gets loose that. That's why you got to move to Brandon's new neighborhood god damn yeah holy shit balls

i'm also looking and my look is very different than mine is looking for uh apartments in new york and it's just oh it's so demoralizing so bad well brandon's moving on to a plantation yes like literally it's, it's fucking massive. That driveway had to have been a mile long. Really? Yeah. Yeah. I just hope I get invited to the pool.

Looks like there was multiple wings of the house. I'm hoping that he made a mistake, and he's like, yeah, it's like an hour and a half north, and then he gets there, and it's like, oh, this is Winnipeg. I hope he's in Gary. Gary is commutable, right? Yeah, but Chicago? Part of me thought a little bit.

I was like, I could live pretty good in Gary. It's by the lake? Why? So is Chicago. So is all of Chicago. Yeah, the entire lakefront is factories. I would like to be in the city. Chicago's really nice i used to live in chicago it was like the most like i ever would have like i ever like walked

and like yeah i would on sunday i would go walk for like five hours every day yes that's so nice because it's all right on the water and it's like like if you're not in the loop when you're walking on the water, you can see the whole skyline of the city. It's really nice. Do people actually go in the water there? Yeah. I've been in the water. Yeah, it's really nice. All up and down the shore.

See, maybe I'll live on the shore. You should. The Chicago shore. I don't know. Most of it is very close to the shore. I was looking. If you're like near Lincoln Park I have no idea

very close and then how soon do you start looking I don't know I have no idea Brandon's looking now I know he's looking now but that's Brandon

that's the thing I've been looking in New York and it's like it doesn't even matter because I'm not going to move in next week you have to be ready to sign that day

you can't look ahead those videos of like 80 people in line down the block to see an apartment. It's crazy. I gotta be more careful this time. Usually I go, I see it and then I'm like, yeah, I'll sign right now. Because they're like one other person's thinking about signing

and then I sign and then I end up hating it and I'm there for over a year. Should we move to Brooklyn, bro? Nah, I want to stay in Manhattan. BK, dude. BK. You should move right above the fucking cell No, I want to stay in Manhattan. PK, dude. PK. You should move right above the fucking cellar, dude. Manifest it.

I want to stay in my exact area. Yeah, where are we? That's the best. Yeah, it's such a nice area. All right, let's wrap it up. Yeah. I don't know. Why are you asking me?

Seniority. Kate. Let's wrap it up. Here we go. Let's get out of here. yeah I don't know yeah why are you asking me seniority Kate let's wrap it up here we go let's get out of here thanks for yakking with us we'll see you tomorrow thanks for having me guys oh yeah

yeah Outro Music