The Yak - Our Office Dog Got a Mouthful of Kate's BBQ Lunch | The Yak 1-23-25

Episode Date: January 23, 2025

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Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. I'm the coolest one out of all of us. That was incredible. You're a sleep debacle? What does that mean? Robak, welcome in Yak. Come here, come here, come here, come here. Robak.com promo code Yak, 20% off your first purchase.

Q-Zips, Polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, and their new sweatshirt, the Hezzy hoodie that I love. They gifted me a couple more of those. So, so comfortable. Go check it out, roback.com, promo code Yak. You had a sleep, a sleep, sit down. You had a sleep debacle? Yeah.

What is a sleep debacle? Your alarm didn't go off? No, no, the alarm went off. Just a a sleep debacle. What is the sleep debacle your alarm didn't go off? Just a classic sleep debacle I went to bed at 11 11 30 alarm set for like I mean I could find the exact times Well, we were gonna need it for the investigation 219 a.m. 232 a.m. 248 a.m. Oh for tennis correct alarm goes off perfect I'm awake turn all the alarms Perfect. I'm awake. Turn all the alarms off because I'm awake. I don't know what happened. I was awake at 730 after that. So I fell back asleep on accident. Sleep debacle. Wait. So you fell back asleep when? Immediately. Apparently I woke up at 730. Then I went back to sleep. Then I was up at like 11. I don't

know how this happened. Correct. I just fell asleep. So it's a true sleep debacle and I'm upset because I wanted to watch the tennis. Do you think the 30 hour ball watching stream might have something to do with it? No, Brandon, I don't. I think it's all the sleep I've missed throughout the college football season. Do you think it has any to do with the fact that you're waking yourself up in the morning to watch strength, the most boring sport of all time? No, I'm not watching pickleball or the association. Oh, so Liam calls the

NBA. The association. I wanted to show you something on Mostly Sports. I can't believe you did. We've had a Blutman emergency. Yeah. Well, you couldn't. We didn't know what to do. We don't have a backup Blutman. You know that, right? What was the emergency? I wanted to show you a video and see if you thought it was funny Can we show it to him now? Yes, it's a mostly sports Do yeah If you want we could try one time okay one time What you pull that go barnheiser? Do you want to go Dickinson the Dickinson one? Oh you go dig?

Dickinson's the one I wanted to show them. I thought this might be able to get Liam Blutman back into basketball. Oh Well just have an open mind yeah Hate a good old sleep debacle yeah, I still have a nightmare. I just have an open mind Liam Are there any photos of you on a roller coaster? Yeah, I want to see there has to I gotta see I like roller coasters wait I want to see what your face yeah were you was it light out when you would have the sleep debacle it's 730 there's light out no cuz I was up in like 219 why did you went back to sleep at 730 I went back to sleep instantly oh it's you're not up at 730 right away. I was like confused cuz I I was up at 219

So then I said, how'd you sleep till 11? Went back to sleep cuz that's too early to be awake for me. We choose my jeans not but 730 is Correct 219 is late. That's just in the that's just nice. You had already fallen asleep. I know I don't it was a sleep debacle Brandon that's why I keep trying to say I got 12 hours of sleep last night. I got great sleep. That's the opposite of a debacle Yeah, you you know it wasn't debacle because I wanted to watch tennis. You most last time you were this well rested 2004 Shit yeah, how old are you 26?

I don't know. Holy shit. Yeah. Look out. How old are you? 26. Mmhmm. That'd be like when he was... You were well rested when you were 6? Yeah. Of course. That makes sense. Alright, let's see this video. Here you go, Liam.

Ready? Watch this. Oh, jeez! None of that. that was funny that was funny all right jump ball we think that's pretty funny watch Spelman look we're still going well the look they won't let go. He's like, I've never seen. He's like a bulldog with a tennis ball. That's 30 seconds, Bludman.

I gotta be honest, it would've been funny if it wasn't 100 Dickinson. That's almost exactly what you said he would say. Yeah. You would agree with that, yeah? And then TCU ended up losing by like 10, so good job, tough guys. Yeah, I thought you'd think that was funny. No, I 30 seconds

after the whistle. They wouldn't give it up. It would have been funny. It was not 100 Dickens. That's what the game is for. Yeah, we got to find out what he thinks is funny. Did you see the Arkansas cover? I did. That was pretty good. Sure. Get that up on the accounts. Yeah, that was crazy. Yeah. All right. So now you're so I got it. Yeah. Well, yeah, I still watch that easy. I still watched college basketball yesterday in due part to nothing being on the we saw the the cover. There was nuts. Air Force San Diego State was maybe the worst

officiated game I've ever seen in my life. Agreed. You know what I'm talking about? I didn't watch it. There were like losing us. There were like three calls that were clear as day, indisputable evidence, like whatever, it's 100%. Make the call. The reviews took 15 minutes and they got each one wrong. Would you call them a debacle? No, it was more so, I don't know, dude, it was pathetic.

Okay. Alright, I'll try again. Any humorous discoveries in sports? Last night? Recently. No, but I mean the tennis animated like Wii thing on YouTube is funny. You know? Yeah, that's true.

Sounds like a riot. Well, it's like their Nickelodeon for yeah Other funny stuff. I don't know I had a chuckle when you guys were looking at Jerome Boger the other day mm-hmm You were an MVP of werewolf yesterday. Yeah, very good player incredible Mints were spot 100% off to read mincy Mincy tough to read is that and see what's but he also read others cross-eyed. Ah that's what it is. Yeah, yeah Okay, thanks Blutman. Yep, of course appreciate it Thanks for having me. He's damn near spry. Yeah. Yeah, this is the most energetic. I've ever seen him He must have been a menace in oh four and what do you what are you envisioning on a roller coaster?

I just want to see him I just want to see it All right mouth agape saying we oh yeah, yeah motion Speaking of sleep to bottles you guys see that thing No, you're talking about Brian and Talmadge. Oh, yeah, I've been following that series for a while. Yeah The dad who's trying to live forever Tracks his son's boners in the middle. We each other they track both each other's his son is like 20 years old You guys don't do that was a joke Putting like young blood in him. Yeah, yeah

nighttime erection data from the 19 year old son and me His duration is two minutes longer than mine raised children stand tall be firm and be upright And then someone was like dude How could you do this without his consent or something and then Talmadge was like I actually was the one who proposed this idea What is this three is that three hours of yeah, that's so that's such a long boner You should call a doctor. He's the dad wait in their sleep such a long boner. You should call a doctor. The dad's closing the gap. Wait, and they're asleep? Like a sleep boner?

Yeah. Yeah, they happen. But for three hours do they have? I guess it, six different boners add up to three hours. How does, it's a 30 hour boner. What do they have a 30 minute boner? A 30 minute boner. A 30 minute boner.

A sensor on their penis? That's a long boner, is it not? I don't know. Even if it's six different boners, that's still a lot of boner time. If you're sleeping eight hours. How many hours was he sleeping? He also has the record for the most consecutive nights of perfect sleep. That's right statistically what? How's that based on like? like yeah, I

Mean the only like these guys are actively trying to do science on themselves and live forever, so we need a control Test and I don't know we should think of like someone here who could we could track their boners Well, they would be willing to do without putting up any fight. I'd be down. I'd be afraid I yeah, I would too, but there's got to be someone who's gonna be somebody I'd be afraid. I yeah, I would too, but there's got to be someone there's gonna be somebody Who's down for anything my guy with the chart on the left was rocked up from 5 there to 645? Holy shit. We what huh? You're talking about the boy. It's a good match. That's a good long boner. Yes, even we're saying we want to track your boners If we all do it, I'm in

Okay, we'll do it. We'll all track your bones No, we will all have the app to track your boners. Well. How do you what's the boner tracker app? Do you have to wear a ring around your cock? Yeah, what? It wakes us up like a time ago. I don't know that much. How do they know this? That's that son needs to murder his father right yeah, yeah with a gun Yeah, some sort of weapon and maybe when he ages he's 19. That's so weird Although he's probably yeah, he's getting really long boners Adam health Erection health dad's on his ass though. How by the Adam sensor. How much is it? So what is this?

149 can't buy a waitlist wait list this many people are tracking their boners ships in seven to eight weeks The sensor goes on your dick what the fuck where else would it go? I didn't even know this was a thing You put that thing around your... Is erection health that important? What? The importance of nighttime erections. Oh. They're a natural and important physiological process.

Healthy adult males typically experience three to five erection episodes during sleep. You can see them, of course you can say that, but how important are they to long-term health? So Che, how about you sleep with a thin blanket and you put like a time-lapse camera next to it? I'm not doing it unless we all do it. But I am down to do it. Well none of us got vasectomies when you got a vasectomy.

You did that by yourself. You do dick escapades alone all the time. Yeah. You track your boner at a movie theater. You eat pussy by yourself. You've never invited us to eat pussy with you not once not one time I think this would be a fun activity for all of us to do I do too I feel like I don't get any we can submit the results anonymously

we could yeah but we did that last time and y'all actually yeah we just did a penis exercise all together so he's fucking right are you guys getting boned up when you're sleeping I don't think so I wake up with them but I don't know that I have them them, but I don't know that I have them during the night I don't know if I have their night. I know what goes on during the night. Yeah, but I'm not a horny dreamer I'm gonna add sleep you guys wake up every day with them, right? I mean, that's not every once every Wake up every day. Oh, so you're healthy every day. Yeah, that's good. Oh, definitely not every day. Okay, you look confused or your

I'm just learning a lot Yeah, how do you as it feel it's six of them every night right next to you Yeah, how much how much is that boner thing and also who's fucking that guy? Oh? Who is fucking that guy? I think he's using his boners for fucking. I don't even think he's using his penis I think he's optimizing his life so much. He doesn't he just doesn't have to fuck so what's the point of living? Optimizing his life so much he doesn't he just doesn't have to fuck so what's the point of living? Meditates and takes pills. I think the only reason to live is to fuck. I'm so confused It just doesn't seem like a fun life. How often do you think you get wet in the middle?

That's so much grosser. It's so much grosser every time depends on the amount of It's usually a done conquering death would be humanities grace achieve this guy is living with the goal to not die But how old is this guy? I want him to die so bad. He's mid fees like hot late 40s He's like he looks exactly as a so if you see him in your town on a bike And you're driving by in a truck you have to hit him. Yeah, I like I Was that a hit can't argues. Yeah Do we do we think he's gonna live longer than everyone? I mean obviously if he's sleeping like that probably no something Eating perfectly so yeah, but that's not living at all. I was watching Rufus to soul at Burning Man, and he fucking

Debilitated the energy he was in the background trying to dance and he fucking debilitated the energy. He was in the background trying to dance. This guy? I don't know, no, wait, what? You don't know any of those words. I didn't know any of those words. I can't tell if that was extremely relevant or just like, he was on VR.

So he does have fun, but he sucks. You watched him at... I was watching a DJ set at Burning Man on my VR. And that guy was... And he was in the backstage Like dancing like a complete dork with his son Talmadge. Can we his son's name is what? Talmadge named after a fucking Akron suburb I Had an uncle Talmadge this is

Really mm-hmm. He was old. This is very weird So his son's I thought I was thinking young son. It's an adult son College-aged he's somewhere in the back. Where were you? That looks awful that looks awful we aren't hearing the music that's the whole thing this looks terrible I think this was the best day of everyone in that crowd's life Where is he he's in the back like the back of the whole crowd you'll see him like Were you vibing clowning I was vibing hard oh there is hell and then you just happen to through the set off

Where the fuck is he what are you doing with your body? What kind of look like you like that? I'm vibrating okay What I don't understand is the people that are there sober no one's sober well no the guys he is forever probably is How long is this set I think it was when it was light out so maybe go earlier Sad him now But that's the boner guy we're finding the boner guy at Burning Man, which do you work? We got a positive like we did for the LSU Stadium. Yeah, and what was your first reaction when you saw him in Talmud? I was at him you that's him. Yeah, there they are There they are

And they ruin the fight whoa whoa holy shit That's Burning Man. Yeah Damn That's pretty badass. I think that's my hell. Yeah, I mean getting out of there. What's like the worst type of people? Be awesome. We just saw quigs. Oh, there he is. Oh, yeah. Oh, wow.

Yeah. Oh, he's. Oh, that ruins everything. Oh, he sucks. He's such a shitty. Oh. You can live forever, but you you dance like a shithead not worth it not worth living not worth it at all I'm like what are you doing with your kid there? I don't well. It's he's 40 so his kids an adult, but it's still weird He's tracking his boner

So weird it is 50 too old to be there at all no Tech guys really oh trying to find themselves Is 52 old to be there at all? No, no, no. That's a lot of old tech guys. Really? Oh, trying to find themselves? I couldn't be there. Well, yeah. No shit. It's outside. Of course, I couldn't be there at 18 or 28.

Your family used to experience Burning Man, right? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Uh. How you doing, Brandon? I'm good. How are you? I'm great. That's great.

It's good to hear. Boner, guys. Good to hear. Yeah. I want to track Chase. What I'm eating the next four days, Blueprint 3, third party tested protein, collagen, peptides, extra virgin olive oil, creatine, cocoa, matcha,

longevity mix, pills. This looks so shit. Anything could be in longevity mix. I'd rather die young. I don't think that seems horrible. Nutty pudding? You want nutty pudding? I wouldn't mind nutty pudding.

It looks awful. That looks terrible. This is not worth living. Like, you could eat this like one day, but if he's doing this constantly, that's miserable. If he was like, I'm gonna do this for 10 years and then live my 50s and 60s and like all out right I could maybe what's the point of living forever if your life sucks yeah and there's no way this guy's like a fun hang like everybody's like let's invite

whoever over this guy rules like he's only there cuz he's rich I don't know I don't know how to get rich yeah how, how did he get rich? How do you rich? I think he's a big tech guy. Oh He's a shade Wallace. Do you think do you believe that? No, I believe you'll live long gir Do you think his poops look like perfect? But like they're like perfect s-shape. Oh, he's selling supplements He literally sells a product called snake oil. No. Oh no. I like that I'm now back in

Wait, let's get somebody on this His olive oil is called snake oil. It's good reviews. Is it just people saying I'm not dead yet. Yeah works I've done this for one month not dead That was like the Dana White health thing where he was like a doctor told me I was gonna die in 10 years unless I did all of these things. Yeah, he just. And I did all these things and I'm not dead yet. He's throwing up in his mouth in the middle of the night. I'd rather get a boner.

Yeah. Every time. Yeah. I prefer boners to throwing up, you? Shay, let us track your boners. Come on, Shay. When was the last time you guys had an hour plus long boner? Oh. Ever.

Ever. Unless it's happened at night, we don't know. I thought that was an emergency room thing. That is. An hour? I suppose you can answer your own question. What's that? Go ahead.

When was the last time you had an hour long boner, Che? Within the last month for sure. I mean, that was... Yeah, that was a layup. Yeah. Showing off. How many... You just passed the ball to yourself.

We have our cumulative dick length now on a bumper sticker. Do we sell any? I hope not. Not cumulative. Me. Average. Average. Oh, God.

What is the cumulative then? 6. six times how many do we measure eight what if that was one penis? Oh my god What would that look like oh my god, it'll be so fucking big So that's 48 inches long. Yeah, well. Oh yeah, whatever section you look like hard That would take a lot a lot of blood a lot of blood is divided by nine nine. Oh nine nine six fifty fifty four Sweet that's a big dick so if that were one dick would it be all of our hues like Like like five inches would be a big cat. You know eight would be mine. It's like yeah It's like how a dog sees a bomb pop.

Yeah. Yeah. I guess. A quilt, yeah, we did a quilt. Yeah. With all of our old blankets. That's sick. We should bring in our panties.

That's a quilt. I read the book Animal House, and you know the main character was like Pinto. Yeah. You know why he had that nickname? Are you talking about the movie? Yeah, that's the movie. The movie, but it was based on a book.into. You know why he had that nickname? You're talking about the movie? Yeah, that's the movie. The movie, but it was based on a book. Or, then he wrote a book about.

Wait, hold on. Animal House was by George Orwell. That's Animal Farm. Animal Farm. Good. Glad I asked. I'm talking about Animal House. The movie? The Belushi movie. You read the book after?

There's definitely not a book about it. But the guy who wrote the movie wrote a book it was like based off his actual experiences and his nickname was Pinto Because his penis had like it was two tone with spots Not a very small beam it's a little tiny bean They call me Pinto because I have a horse penis So he went his whole life thinking they called him Pinto because there were spots on his penis not realizing it was because it Was so small perhaps that's my only penis Panto. Nanak. I want to get this animal house book It was a good book the movies probably better

The movie is better, but the book was it was an interesting book. It's a lot about getting hazed at an ivy league school John Belushi in it Make the book he's five seven Belushi oh not anymore but two-tone penis spots like Belushi had a better last couple years of his life and this dude is trying yeah yes she went balls the wall yeah I diet. I bet you he regrets it you think so Yeah, all to the wall only works for so long But it's probably fun as fuck when you're doing it. I don't living in a Beverly Hills hotel. That's where he died right? Yeah, the phrase balls to the wall

How do we come up with that? I'm gonna have a a good time tonight so I'm going balls to the wall. That sounds fucking awful. Put your balls on the wall right now. I don't know, look it up. I thought it was when you and your lady were going up against the wall. Oh really? So your balls were going under and hitting the wall. Am I wrong?

To the wall. To the wall. Ball shaped grips on. Pushing these balls to the wall would put the wall. It's a ball-shaped grip zone. Balls. Pushing these balls to the wall would put the aircraft at maximum thrust. It was an aircraft thing knocking. It knocked really hard from behind. Balls hitting.

You thought it was, that would be a long swing. I know, I always thought damn. Okay. So I guess that's the answer. Cool. Either balls out or balls to the wall is connected with the vulgar sense of balls testicles. Except via folk etymology. What's folk etymology?

That's just slang? Yeah. Sheesh. You a Chris Farley guy? I like him. Didn't love him. Why? You didn't think he was funny?

No. I love Matt Foley, motivational speaker. I love a couple of things. I'm starting out live. I didn't love Tommy Boy. Huh. Even back then, I was like. Hit a little too close to home?

No. It didn't hit close to home at all. I liked him on SNL, but I never really got. I wasn't crazy, Chris Farley. I liked him. Who was your guy? Back then on SNL, Phil Hartman. I liked Phil on SNL, but I never really got, I wasn't crazy, Chris Farley. I liked him. Who was your guy? Back then on SNL, Phil Hartman. I liked Phil Hartman, I was a more square guy.

He had a bad ending. Bad ending, big time. Real bad. Yeah, wife popped him. Right about the same time. They died within like three months of each other. No, he died first. He died in like 94, Farley then died until 97.

I think that story and Lin-Bias combined made me stay away from cocaine for a while. I was terrified of cocaine because of that. Wait. Because that's the story. Farley, right? She was sold cocaine by Andy Dick. Yeah, Andy Dick reintroduced her to cocaine. I was like, cocaine just makes you kill your husband.

Hold on, really? I just thought she was crazy. I didn't know there was a Dick story. She relapsed. I didn't know Andy Dick was... They were on the show together. Yeah. Oh. The news radio. Yeah, very good show. Yeah, the story is Andy Dick reintroduced his wife

to cocaine. So she had to kill Phil Hartman. That makes sense. I was like, what? So cocaine makes you do? No, definitely not. Yeah. I haven't killed anyone.

Lin Beiss didn't kill anybody. He just died. He just died. But as a young and learning those two things, I was like, cocaine he just died. Yeah. But as a as a young and learning those two things I was like cocaine sounds not cool. Yeah. It was. Did he have a heart issue as well or no. I don't know. He just because it wasn't the story that was like his first time which is not true. Lin bias. Yeah that was. Yeah. But I bought it like when I was like 13 or whatever and I learned of that story I was like oh my god one time. That's like the guy

John one time It took off parcel van talking. He got fired from ESPN because he got like blackmailed from a Prostitute he was buying cocaine from he's like that was my first does the first time he bought Yeah, you don't get your first one of the chances the first time I get coke and higher price mailed same time the first time I get coke and higher prostitutes. I get blackmailed at the same time. Brutal. Artie Lang's nose scared me off a little bit.

Oh, yeah. I didn't realize that you could really... Yeah. Terrific. That one was tough. Artie Lang. Scared me off a little. I still do.

I'm not a pussy. And that, yeah, it scares you off like a tiny bit. The poker player. What was the poker players name? My goodness why does that happen? Yeah, I think he was starting heroin Oh like Voldemort it was a poker players name who like won the World Series of poker and then just did shit little coke in His nose and nubs too Can't remember he was like a kid prodigy That's got to be a ton of cocaine.

Yeah. Yeah, that's gotta be, yeah, there he is. Cause like McCarthy's isn't even starting to cave, is it? No. Who, what was this guy's name? Stu Unger. And he does a ton. Stu Unger.

That guy does a cool as hell. Well, maybe not. No. No. No, he does. I. No, it doesn't. I need to reapply that. I need to. From a distance on a small thumbnail, he looks cool as hell.

Did you guys see Oppenheimer's rookie card dropped? Yeah. It's pretty sick. What does that mean? Like he had his fanatics, maybe someone? Yeah, tops. Robert Oppenheimer's first ever autograph card is here.

Very difficult signature to find. How, how? How'd they get it? Do they have stats on this card? If you pull it, do they give you a deal for it? Will the Pittsburgh Pirates give you season tickets? You get a nuke? Yeah.

Get a nuke. One nuke. Trade in for one nuke Would you guys like treat me with more respect if I just had a nuke? Yeah, I'd be a little more Hold a little more. Yeah, okay Does any single you guys wouldn't get mad at me anymore? Wait what they just they they do like a release of like celebrities and historical figures in cards now.

I don't know how they're sourcing the autographs. They do some old ass presidents, don't they? Yeah, that's tops. Like, the Rizzler just did a card with another card company. Heath Ledger, Robert Oppenheimer, Rizzler. You said that so casually. So casually. Some of the most iconic people of all time.

People who have shaped history. George Washington, the Rizler. Rizler's is written in crayon. Marilyn Monroe, Joe DiMaggio. Wow. Interesting. But it's just a copy of their signatures, right? Like so, who cares?

Is it a copy of their signature or an actual, do they cut it from a document? They probably cut it from a document. Surely it's real, right? It has to, but why does it matter if it's real? I think that's the whole point. Yeah, I think that is the point. But I would.

I don't care, but I do think that's the point. If it looked exactly like it, I'd put it on my shelf. Doing it to display it, who gives a shit? Brandon, you're a knickknacks guy. Explain. What is the point? I would just say, yeah, that's real.

I don't know. There's just something about the connection that this person signed this one time and it'll never happen again, and you've got it. You're holding an item that this other person Yeah, you're holding something that they did and it's of rarity and it can never be, yeah. Reproduced? Especially if they're dead. I've never been a huge autograph guy, of rarity and it can never be, yeah, reproduced.

Especially if they're dead. I've never been a huge autograph guy, but I have gotten into it in the last, pristine auction when they advertised with the show this last time got me into it, and I've been chasing autographs for the last three months. Would you rather have autographed jersey or game worn unautographed jersey?

Think I'd rather have, well, depends. Just like a pro. Right, no, you have to, no, it doesn't. No, it depends. A pro, I would like'd rather have, well, depends. Just like a pro. No, you have to, no. No, it depends. A pro, I would like an autographed jersey. But for my team, I would be especially have a Mississippi State jersey from a big game, something like that.

But if I have no connection to them, the autograph. What autographs do you have? What's your best? Just brought in an OJ Simpson autograph today. Whoa. Nice. I got a, yesterday I bought a Pete Rose and a Carl What's your best? I just bought an OJ Simpson autograph today. Whoa! Nice! I got a, yesterday I bought a Pete Rose and a Carl Yastrimsky. He has pretty good handwriting.

Those twos? R.I. 22-ler. Kind of want one. Yeah. How much are they going for oh? That's not bad Rizzlers for sale Get him now before he changes autograph

That's crazy, I kind of want the Oppenheimer. I'm not gonna lie cool. That is cool Probably really expensive. Don't have to be. One of one. But then what do you do with it? Yeah, that's what I keep going back to. What do you do with it? Do you sell it to the collectors?

So the purpose is to sell. If I said I had an oppo power. But what's the end game of that item then? Who's buying it and then what are they doing with it? They're gonna buy and hold. And then sell it later. Yeah, they're banking on it. And that's it. That's it. That's a cycle from then on out. That's stupid Yeah, like if I was tightest his place. He's like, do you want to see my Oppenheimer autograph?

It'll be I'll be like, okay, and then it'll be like a one second. Yeah If I went to your yeah, I'm like, oh you're good man. Is it upstairs? Don't worry. Yeah, don't worry about it I believe you Take your word for it If I pulled out an Oppenheimer autograph you guys would be wowed for at least three to five seconds. Yes Yeah, that's worth something. I guess I would ask like how did you get it and you would say I bought it and This guy's a loser if you're like I met Robert Oppenheimer through some That would just be a much more interesting story. Yeah, if you're like, I met Robert Oppenheimer through some way. That would just be a much more interesting story. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I guess it has meaning to you. Yeah.

I'd like to hear that story. But if you're like, I outbid this other rich fuck, but cool, man. So would you rather meet somebody or have their autograph, Brandon? Meet somebody. One second handshake. I'd steal that. Okay. But that's not really on the table every time. So, I just, they look cool. They look cool in a frame. Wait, man, I get the appeal of memorabilia. I think if you just buy fake autographs

and just display it. Yeah, but you would know. For way, what? I would know. That's something to know. You wouldn't know. Huh? You would know.

How would someone know? Buy it framed on my wall? So I was there yesterday, and I went to a guy a new card shop I got and this guy trades in autographs right and I pulled one out and I said look at that one He said yeah I don't let me see that and he took his fingers and said that and said I don't think that was real Huh, you could tell by eyeballing it. I couldn't but he could It was a cream. I would just have but he could. It was a Kareem I built a bar. I would just have to avoid inviting people

like that over my house. The New York Times sells their crosswords signed by the editor. 150 bucks, Will Shortz. I would pay for it. Yeah, it's pretty good. You could get your favorite puzzle and it'll sign it. I would pay $150 for a crossword signed by Shortz.

Will Shortz is kind of on his deathbed. Shortz or Feiglin? Wait, is he? Is he dying? He had a long stint in the hospital. And is he the Goat Crossword guy? He's the guy. He's the guy. He's the on his deathbed. Wait, is he? Is he dying? He had a long stint in the hospital. And is he the Goat Crossword guy? He's the guy. He's the guy.

He's the only one. He like invented the whole thing, right? He is the editor. He's the face of the grid. You still doing connections and all that? Yeah. I'm pretty sure the story with him, he went to Indiana.

Oh. He invented his own major, and I never understood how he got away with that. I read about that. He majored in like puzzle making. Puzzles, yeah. He's the only guy who ever did it. And that's cool, but it's also like,

how does an 18 year old get away with that? Yeah, you can do it at WVU. You choose three minors, and that turns into the major of your choice. Really? Yeah, my buddy majored in African drums. He took African history class and drum classes. No shit. Yeah, I Didn't I do they have to do that ramble for certain professors who that's what I always confused me

I was like who's teaching him if he invented this whole curriculum this guy who's been waiting Get to work so now do they have that as a major puzzle master master I would go back to school. I don't know what the term is, but yeah, I don't know. Yeah, you can buy shorts. The NYT Games merch is fire. They've figured it out. Are you sure? No.

Fire. It's fire. Shorts. Known to hold a college degree in? Enigmology? Enigmatology. Enigmatology? The study of puzzles.

Wow. His brain is just wired different, huh? He had a stroke. Oh shit. So what's going to happen to the crossword? Well you can tell when he's not at the helm. Yeah. Really? He uses a lot of Oreo.

What? Oreo is in every one of his fucking fucking puzzle way to Oreo ego er? You could tell you could tell shorts puzzle. He's an Oreo guy You know what they're saying no Oreo is oftentimes an answer answer because it has three thousand in a link everything else Oh, he has asked a lot as snake that crazy clear pack How many different kind of questions can you ask for the answers Oreo though? There's, he does what? You can word it in many, many ways.

Like how? Stuffed snack? A Monday would be like Nabisco cookie, but a Sunday would be like a really wild back history clue to the Oreo. Milk dipper. So milk's favorite would be like Tuesday. Milk's favorite, yeah. Yeah,'s favorite would be like Tuesday's favorite. Yeah

Yeah, like wednesday would be the original like the the hydrox predates this popular cookie. Mm-hmm You get it. Yeah, I do I Same answer so boring Oh Name something you love so I'm just saying the oreo Name something you love Do you love the most The Oreo part tell me the first thing you do in the morning the reason you wake up

The Oreo aspect. Well, yeah, I mean just doing the same thing. There's so many There's so many like different answers. Yeah, it's kind of fun. Like oh, that's a gimme Oreo Yeah, you like build the puzzle and then you get put into a corner I imagine and there's only so many variations. It's just always Oreo like yeah Me and Kyle tried to do a stream of where we just got an empty crossword grid Didn't look at the clues and had just fill it up with words that fit impossible damn impossible. Yeah Oreo really you can't think of you in that situation? Nobody can do it. You have to have a trigger to... No, it's just impossible to fill out.

I want you to try to do it one day. You want to do it with me? Yeah, I'll try. All right. You know, I like to sit in with you. Pull it up right now. People are going to hate it. Well, not if we make up the words.

We won't get a corner done. How is that possible? You're simply saying you can't think of a 12-letter word or I think you can't you can't think of words or phrases There's so many intersections, and then you get to a point where you got a has to have an E. It's impossible Okay, what about Oreo Oreo is a great standby, but you can only use it once oh you can't double you can't double stuff You guys do it every day Probably about four to five a day. It's ramping up upstairs. We got a we got a crew Damn sometimes we have about ten people in the anus studio doing it sweet. That is sweet

You never been upstairs. You don't come upstairs. I'm a big crossword guy. Never been We also play chess up there Play chess in a while. I have okay, sorry what the fuck? up there. We haven't played chess in a while. I have. Okay sorry. I mean what the fuck? You gotta play some chess. I don't ever go upstairs. You never go upstairs. I don't know what am I supposed to do upstairs? Just hang out. Just go up and I do crossword. It's cool in the ANA studio. That's so you can walk in and the seat is yours. I feel like there would be like a record scratch and everyone at the bar would turn and look at the... Maybe at first, but they'd be nervous because we collect a crew of...

Yeah. Miscreants? Just, it's... Yeah, we collect a crew. Yeah. You know Brandon takes the elevator down? Oh, that's bad. What the fuck?

Well, we were talking about upstairs and it just triggered a memory that yesterday we were both upstairs and you took the elevator down it was today oh it was two hours even worse it was two hours ago when I came talk to you and you're off you know what you're a real prick that's crazy the elevator down I came I came I visited Dan in his office and he was like oh well you're not what you say I'm not being friendly today or something and then I didn't say that then you just got up and left I you you left your office as I was talking to you because I didn't want to be in there anymore

Once you got there I was like parties over But then you took the elevator down. Do you do that every time? You know why, Dan? Why? Do you know why? Why? Okay. When I come up, I get in the elevator.

So I'm up on the second floor. What else is on the second floor? The elevator. The elevator. If I take the stairs down, the elevator stays on the second floor. Oh, so I'm actually the one who's fucking it up. And then when I want to come back up, I got to wait for the elevator. So I'm fucking it up. You're fucking it up. You're throwing the rhythm off. Yeah, because I bring it up and I walk. The elevator

wants to be on the ground floor. You're right. And I always have to wait for the elevator and that's pathetic as well because I stand there waiting for the elevator when someone else, I'll be walking with someone, they'll take the stairs. I'll take the elevator and they're gone by the time I get up there. You're left an unopened link. Yeah. You have to close. All right, I'll fix it. You're right. Now that you explain it, you're right. Or just hit the down button when you get up to the top.

I could do that. That'd be crazy. Strand yourself up there? Yeah, you're right. How would you ever get down? I don't even know. I think I just live there. This is where I want to slide.

I want to slide in this office. You've been talking about slide for so long. You're not going to do a slide. It was like a legal hangup, wasn't there? I think so. We gotta figure that out. Are slides getting more extreme? Dude, perfect.

Oh yeah. Like water park slides? Water park slides? There's that amusement park here that they just opened. I think we pulled off. It's all slides, right? It's all slides. No water.

Adult slides too, right? No water? No water. It's just a park of like, I guess slides. Yeah, we walked. It's an indoor slide park. Oh, I'm talking about water slides. Oh. I don't like the one where you have to stand there and it's like just a shoot by yourself.

That one always freaks me out. What's wrong with that? That's scary. Scary as fuck. I don't know. I like being a raft. Yeah, they basically have water roller coasters now. Huh?

Do a loop on any of them? I want to send you up, like up and down and up and down, and water jets like shoot you back up the hills and down, so it's like a real... I'd be scared of getting stuck every time. That's a nightmare. Yeah, in Texas? Was that in Texas?

Kansas, I think. What? What happened? Kid lost his head. Yeah, Kid lost his head. They were opening it. Did he die? No.

I think it was the son of a CEO or something. And yeah. Was it Luigi? No. They they opened it. I think it was it was the son of a CEO and Yeah, was it Luigi? No, he went on a slide and got to be headed. Yep. How does how? Filter I don't know but it happened the knife crazy amount of trust in Oh I thought it was an older boy. I thought about I see what the water slide was that Kansas City Make that mistake a lot. Yeah, I do. I do That's a nightmare You make that mistake a lot. Yeah, I do. I do. I just remember part of something. No, that's a nightmare.

I just want to see the slide. That's more of a roller coaster. This isn't even a water slide. So it's like treadmills with jets that can pull you up. They like the black track. That's a treadmill that might shoot you up. They like the black track. That's a treadmill that makes you feel the water slide. Okay. That's what he died on.

I don't know. Oh man. I have a literally picture. Picture wasn't good. You bring that up. That was you. Any tall boys been on space mountain recently? No, no, I haven't.

Not recently. I'll never. You see every single day day even when was the last time you're on Space Mountain Boys been on he's playing tennis against the wall Wall ball I'm saying as a tall guy I had that fear going in there It's completely dark and you can like feel the Tracks above you. It's it's it's tight. I get that way on some roller coasters. I don't do anything. Don't do rollercoasters I think I'm too old for it. I've now I do the calculations of how dangerous it is or whatever It's run by like a high schooler. Yeah, when you're like 16 years, you don't think about anything. You're like fuck it I'll just jump on this thing, but now I overthink everything I was always like that also the wait time is not worth it true

The crazy ones like carnival right like getting on the ring of fire I would flip you around or what why are we trusting these people? Those go out twice a year the carnival. Yeah, there's the boat that's had back and forth galore The crazy mouse is always falling off the track. Yeah, no Good topic yeah fun. I'll remember what made you do the VR roller coaster and you almost puked You have that clip? That was the Rhone scream. Yeah, it was.

It was one of those lantern flies. Yeah. That we're like, here, I'll do an ad. MTV, the Challenge All-Stars, one of my favorite shows of all time. For the first time ever, the Challenge All-Stars is coming exclusively to MTV. But this time with a major twist, 13 All-Stars pairs of rivals will need to work together to win together in, uh,

MTV's the challenge All-Stars rivals. That's right. 13 of the bittersweet, or sorry, 13 of the bitterest All-Star pairs of rivalries in challenge history are going to have to get along together if they want to win the title of All-Stars We're talking exes frenemies, all time worst enemies partnering up, including challenge favorites, uh, Nani turbo, Anissa, Ashley M Leroy, Devin, no other season has so much tension drama or bad blood because the best chance for all these all stars to come out on top is to live and die by their rival. This might just be the most challenging all star season yet. Think you could make it work with your worst enemy? Hmm. Could I? Hmm. Brandon, we could win this.

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Football. Best weekend of the year? It was last weekend. Last weekend. Why is that? This one's pretty good. This is best Sunday. I think the stakes are higher. Football. Football. Best weekend of the year? It was last weekend. Last weekend. Why is that? This one's pretty good. This is best Sunday.

I think the stakes are higher this week. Punching two tickets. Agreed or disagree? I think it's better this week. Do you have Zah on the roller coaster, TJ? I'm not gonna lie to you guys. I'm not... Oh!

Why? That's when he had a bug on him. Oh That's what he had a bug on him I did that laugh Good how much I'm sweating that's not We got to get you back on we need another KB's wild no point there's a news about that. Oh, yeah. What is it? It might be its own like pretty decent sized production Oh fuck yes Whoa, I don't know if I was bad We're pitching it

On the Yak YouTube? We're pitching it Yeah It's just being pitched around It's being pitched around We've had some meetings Love that The Yak would be involved

Yes, KB's wild is legendary So funny too thinking about when it first came up and you just didn't have any plan for it. Is that what happened? Yes. It hit it and we're like, what's KB's Wild? And you're like, oh yeah. You're like, it's tomorrow. It's tomorrow.

And we're like, what is it? But I brought it to the table, right? Yeah, no, no, the next day you had a plan. You had no idea. In the moment you had no idea. No. You just said KB's Wild. Yeah, I need to see some more. Gabe is wild. That's the plan. Way too long. Way too long. Way, way too long.

Plinko day tomorrow. Yes. Games are so healthy. They are. Yeah. Regularly playing games, well into adulthood. They are. Nothing better. Keeps you engaged, keeps you going. Keeps you. Keeps you happy. Keeps you active. Yeah. Think a game came first or a sport?

Sport. No, game. Sport. Game. I think guys. What's the old sport? Like there's guys using heads to like go through that hoop. Sport replaces war. Sport, you need multiple people. Game, I think they came up with stuff to entertain themselves. Games were played by women and children as the men were at war.

That's my belief. Yeah. And then somewhere along the line. But you, you are the game man. I thought games were created when war wasn't happening. So then they came up with sports to prep for war. Yeah. And then they were playing games.

And then they were playing games. And then they were playing games. And then they were playing games. And then they were playing games. And then they were playing games. And then they were playing games. And then they were playing games. And then they were playing games. And then somewhere along the line. But you, you are the game man. I thought games were created when war wasn't happening. So then they came up with sports to prep for war. To prep for war. Yeah, they're like, we don't have a war right now,

what do we do? Oh, we play games. I don't know anything about early humanity. I don't either. Like early, early. How early, like early, early? Early, early. Like how early?

Like 10,000 BC. Like when there was many different species of Homo erectus sapien yeah how early as I guess we know the Adam and Eve Christian story but what is this the science story I'm reading a book all started out in the was known human. Yeah the first case. Oh When did we go from who was the first recorded person? Yeah? Who stopped being a monkey and became a human? Yeah? Yeah? That had to feel low. Yeah. Yeah, no Yeah, you'd be lonely. Yeah, yeah, don't suck. That'd be a cool movie. You'd feel bad fucking something you'd have to

That would suck. That'd be a cool movie. You'd feel bad fucking something. You'd have to. But would you? You wouldn't be shamed by anyone? Cushum. Kind of have to. He's the first person in history.

Cushum? Should we show him more love? We should do, let's do Cushum Day. A famous person writing the name Cushum. Cushum is found on several Uruk period clay tables. How many years ago was that? So it might be a title. Was he the first famous guy? That was 6,000 years ago? The first it might be a title. Let's see the first famous guy That was six thousand years ago first name. I was all person so those five thousand years ago

I'm not even and how old is the earth this ship blows millions That's crazy Took us this long Yeah, yeah late start humanity is millions. Yeah. Can you find one of those like time lapses? Yeah. It shows how long like dinosaurs and how long there is a good one on YouTube and I want to see your mind. I want to see that. This is one of those where they do the size comparisons or time comparisons. We'll show you the earth rolls from left to right. Eon and 99.9% of it was without.. I wanna see it too. Oh yeah.

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That's the exact opposite. Of the past. Earth's evolution in ten minutes? Did you know there was like six enormous extinctions of dinosaurs and then they came back again and then they got wiped out again and then they came back. They were doing something wrong. There is a nice age to sin in them. There was a bunch of them. They had plenty of chances then. Yeah. Wait, billions of years. We said millions. Our solar system began to emerge out of a dense cloud This is like Big Bang.

of interstellar gas and dust. Well. This cloud collapsed into a swirling disk of matter that got hotter and hotter and hotter until hydrogen. Brandon, you want to take your head off for the last one? I don't like this guy's voice at all. I don't like any of it. Let's find a different one. I just want to take your head. I like this guy's voice at all. I can't even let's find a different one I just want to see the light like where they just go in a line

How do you know this shit? Oh somebody sent Kyle a timeline of all humanity. It's upstairs. It's really long Eric Yeah, that's sick. Send it where it's in a it's go get it's on paper Yeah Was that a request to me to get no no I mean no we just have we describe it I guess it's real big real it's so it's a whole timeline of humanity why did they send it to you so they knew I

would like it and it was a very good deed that's a gift I've been searching for your gift for months okay here we go here we go oh yeah this is what I wanted this is just shit blowing up Che had the right question how do we know any of this 450 five signs on YouTube duh we're just guessing a brief history of time Stephen Hawking before there was Pangea were we all separate and then we came together as Pangea and then we split up again?

You're asking the wrong person. And are we gonna Pangea again? Literally couldn't be asked. I feel like Tommy would know way more than us. Yeah. Tommy would. We don't know shit. I'll ask him about Pangea when I get home. What's going on here?

Bunch of water. Okay, some thermo stuff under the sea is starting to get it going. This is 37 hundred million years ago. The fuck? Well, that's not... That shit's eerie. Is that a barnacle?

What's going on there? Yeah, it's a barnacle. So we started in the wet. That's true of all of us. Started in the wet. Steven's never left. Tadpoles? That's true of all of us. Started in the wet. Yeah. Steven's never left. Tadpoles?

No? Yeah. Taking them a while. Yeah, hello. The first thing on those, it was a fish that grew little legs, right? And it like ran up on the beach and then it went back in. I think that's a children's book. I think sharks were first.

I don't know shit. What is this? The ocean have warts? Anything. Sharks were first. I don't know shit. What is this? The ocean have warts? Anything. Oh, there's some chlorophyll. That's, are you guessing? Huh? That's not what chlorophyll is.

It's powerhouse of the cell. We're talking about mitochondria? Chlorophyll is for plants. Chlorophyll is plants, right? That's plants. I was saying whatever green, whatever is green. Oh, yeah, that was green. It was green.

Good job, Kate. It's green. Okay, bubbles. Here we go. Here comes the fish with legs. We're still 25, 24 million, 2400 million. What are we going to bet on? What's next? I think some fire might come to play. How's gotta be here before fire no I think the water will bar but we were the ones that we didn't invent fire what's going on here

right now hundred pages in love it keep an eye out for games and or sports so yeah that's really what we're looking for so we always have an atmosphere what isn't that what you're asking What? Isn't that what keeps- Dan, you're asking the wrong thing. Isn't that what makes it warm enough in here to like grow shit? Like a greenhouse? What's going on here? Like the ozone? What is this?

What the fuck is this? What is a big hay field? This is not answering any of our questions. Here we go, here we go. This is like drunk history, just stupid history, us narrating whatever the fuck this is. This isn't- nothing's happening. Okay. This shit sucks.

Cells. Kate, cells't nothing's happening. Okay. This shit sucks. Cells. Kate, cells were buff- Okay. Eggs, it's eggs. That's fish eggs. Oh, I think she's right. Plurifil. Paracenus Gravidus.

Jellyfish. Alright, we're starting to cook with something. So fish are going. It's like a plant, but an animal. Fish are getting going down there. Like a coral was the first thing. thing well now we're back on land though Angie is splitting up. Oh fuck. Oh are we on earth or the? We're on earth oh

Oh my god showing up this ice. Oh, yeah It's in cold. Oh, it's getting warm. Oh the ice. It's getting cold. Oh shit Why though? Oh, it's everywhere. Yeah, why did the ice age happen? What what start what started that? Oh that squirrel pulled Brandon when was your ass born? There we go There we go. Oh, now we got shit. Oh yeah, yeah Here we go now we got something That's us the walking fish

Okay, although they go Angie up looking see Sores oh fuck that guy rocked now. We're yeah That happened fast to them elephant. Hey, what a space wait. Well. Hold on. We skipped a lot. Did we? craft Well, I think that's appropriate to time though. We were look we're the last like second Think that's appropriate to time though. We were we're the last like second Yeah, we got space like they got tired of doing it at the end or something man I thought we were gonna get increments of thousands at least Still no games, so that's that's a story of us. That's it zero million. I didn't learn shit. Oh You guys ever been to like a giant crater from the asteroid? You went to one crater lake, right?

Crater lake, yeah. Well, that's from a volcano. Yeah. I went to the one in Arizona that it's like two miles across. It's crazy. It's like this flat desert and then like... You're talking about the Grand Canyon? No.

It's like a two mile across crater hole in the middle of the desert and it's just like, we'd be so fucked if that happened now. Yeah. There's one in Iowa. Really? Close to us. What was the Ice Age? Got cold.

Why? Mm. I think because we got hit by a comet or something, and it made so many clouds that everything was clouds. And then it was like a blanket from the sun, and things got cold I swear to God it's like something like that You said that with and the swear to God kind of sold volcanoes. Yeah, it was something with smoke

I was skeptical made a blanket I think that is what it's too much for your brain to handle someone the freezer or something I think kind of learning today was this covered in the documentary. Oh, there is is better earth science for kids This is our speed and ice ages a period of Earth's history when the ice on the polar caps Significantly expanded due to the overall lowering of Earth's global temperatures well that goes without saying but why did the temperatures lower? How to science what we're asking? We can't even understand the kids shit. Mmm. we living in? I don't think this is too simplistic We're currently living in an ice age

And somebody told me oh Man yes, sir. It's your brain. We need to go dumber. Yeah, put on ice age to show me What sure guys go to Costco? Yeah? I saw Walmart guys who out with a new video. Oh, did they? All right. Oh, we're giving them another chance? Well, something's a little different this time.

No, they're in my 1-1 right now. No, they suck. They're not taking Rizzlers. No, they're in my 1-1. And there's something big missing this time. Oh, no, the hat? Tell me the hat's not gone. No, Danny.

What? Danny! Oh! And you said there your one one There may or may not be a part four this may be the last Walmart guys part will still be making Walmart videos on the space Sorry, what dad seems like way more normal now? I don't like this. I need a hat hat with the hat tied it all together Whoa, wait a minute We're Walmart guys, oh of course we're gonna exercise with the dumbbells You own it no the hat the hat the hat made it all work spider-man without his mask

Gonna try on the sunglasses Hey, you look good. Maybe at the end he tries on a top hat. I know Oh At least this guy's not tracking his kids boners. We don't know that we don't know that I did their profile picture is funny But other than that yeah, I fuck with that That's a new logo or the old logo? Oh, man. Man, I don't know. Oh, hey.

Oh, hi. Hey. Hello. How are you in the studio? Uh-oh, food. Uh-oh. Wait, your food right there, Kate? Oh, my god.

Oh, Kate. Kate, are there bones? You got a bone? You got a bone? Kate, you got a bone? Kate, your headphones. Headphones. Oh, my god Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones?

Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones?

Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones?

Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Kate, are there bones? Okay, that was uh Yeah, she's like oh my god. He likes me loves me. Oh, no. I don't have a barbecue right next to me. Oh lord Oh my god, Kate. Oh Get it out He ate the bones You not realize the giant plate of meat? She was petting it for a good two Mississippi count watching it eat. And then she pulled the leash off or the collar off and then just showed it to us. As the dog ran away.

Whoa. That was the worst under pressure moment I've ever seen anyone... Total collapse. Can I watch it again? In a fight or flight, she chose flight. I've never seen someone crumble under pressure. That was... That was...

Oh my God. Oh no. Did you see the collar move? She showed us the collar while the dog was just running away. And then she ran away with her headphones on. Oh my god. Oh no. Did you see the collar move? She showed us the collar while the dog was just running away. She ran away with her headphones on. Oh. Kate somehow went like 0 for 5.

Yeah, that was Joey Gallo. Kate? Oh my god. Kate, are they both? Kate, are you cold? Kate, are you cold? Kate, are you cold? Kate, are you cold? Kate, are you cold? Kate, are you cold? Kate, got a bone? Hey, he's got a bone. I got a bone. Hey, your headphones.

Headphones. Oh, my god. Holy shit. Kate, what was that? Did she forget about the meat? Yeah. She forgot about the meat. She did.

I mean. She forgot about the headphones. She grabbed the collar. Hmm. Man. Wouldn't want to see any of her kids with like bleach in their hands. She rips off their shirt and shows it to the other kid.

How many times is she going to apologize to the dog? Oh my god. That dog is going to be like, we get it, Kate. Stop fucking apologizing. I'm a dog. There's just a full plate of barbecue right next to her. Thought the dog was just coming straight to her. He really likes me. Oh, here we go.

Oh, no. You handled that well Kate Really good under pressure Kate things to say for yourself I got the bones out of her mouth onto the floor And I said thank God and then she went and she swallowed them right back down again And And she said she's gone what? No, I feel really bad.

Wait, do we, are the bones in her? The owner's with her now. She seems fine. She ate the bones? She ate the bones. I do think cooked bone, cooked bone's bad. No, she'll be fine. That poop's gonna hurt.

It's not, what? I feel terrible. I got the bones out bones for they were slippery. And then she got around me and she like literally went right back for them again. And that time she got him down. I feel so fucking bad. Sorry, I don't have to I feel like I'm not a dog. I'll start my food on the ground. That might be that's place to start. And that's also not something you're going to be able to keep track, like you're going to leave your food there tomorrow.

No, no, I'm not. No. Oh my god, I'm such a slob. That dog had a good nose, though, because that dog's never coming to the side. So when we were watching, you got the bone out and then just left it there. Yeah, we saw it happen.

No, in that room in there, I got the bone out and then just left it there and we saw it happen You are not a dog person yeah It it wasn't meandering it just like came straight in and right straight for the yeah, what a nose on that thing. I Want to make her feel bad we see the bone the boat the re bite of the boat just a colossus just I've never seen an ofer quite like that George Bush mission accomplished we got it her face was so proud when she got the bone out as she was looking up third bone She was proud. Yeah, like five different times for the wrong Dog loves me the collar. I got the collar. I got the bone out. Oh

My god That was that was the person by the way who was just explaining to us how the ice ages happen Scratch all that okay wait do we have? Wait you put the bone right there I don't have dogs. I've never I didn't grow up around dogs. I didn't realize like how You go out and then you put it right there. Oh, it's right there. Get it out.

Oh my god, Keith. And then he came in and said, she's gone. Yeah. She's gone. Yeah, she ate it. She's gone. You have a little league picture of the dog? Oh, no.

Oh, he sucks. She's gone a little league picture of the dog I saw painting vet bills that come with that. I'm so sorry. Yeah, I think a stomach pumps only like three grand you should be Do you think you're good under pressure I thought I was until that just happened We need to do a taffer stress test with Kate Kate rescue It was it was it was incredible to watch because it was every move was the wrong move and it all happened within like 90-second it was like watching a horror movie like no don't put the bone right in front of it again

That dog never like Layla dogs then she loves everybody She never like comes over to me and I was like, oh, she's coming to me. Like never occurred to me that was because of the ribs on the floor. So dumb. What's up with Brandon? Good thing you didn't grab chocolate for dessert.

Yeah. What's up with him? He's a little on par. What's he, what's he up to? Something, something's happening. Is it because, oh, did he not get his nap because you had to tie this shit up? Yeah, I think so.

That's exactly what it is. I think he's shucking up about the dog dog because he came in right before I started recording He sat on the couch didn't say anything. But now that you mention it, that's what it was. Yeah on the couch He was walking in small talk Like it was like a last-ditch effort to maybe talk me out of doing the show so he could sleep Yeah, cuz he's like and he kind of has the lay the land here from like 6 a.m. To 9 a.m.. So anyone who fucks that up It's fussy. Yeah, should we do the whoopie cushion? Oh, yeah

You have it still oh you have it right there nice. Oh, yeah, wait get Brandon He's gonna be so fucking pissed always gonna be so pissed going to be so pissed. He's going to be so off. Maybe stop it like at that size, maybe. You're getting his ass. You're getting his ass. By the way, Mountain Dew, add a blast of refreshing tropical lime flavor to your game day with Mountain Dew Baja Blast. Mountain Dew Baja Blast is part of my game day ritual.

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Oh, Kate, vindicated. Oh my God. Yes, hey. You are, I mean, it is true. It's dog. Leila's just running around. But everybody loves Leila. I understand, but like, that is not the dog's fault.

Leila's a good vibes gal. I like having Leila around. She's not one of those dog, like. She's shy. I don't, I'm not a big dog in the workplace guy. I think I've said this and people got mad at me. But that's more for like big dogs that like, will just like run into you and stuff.

Layla just minds her own business. Barely ever see her. She's like a sweet soul. Except for when she's eating Kate's ribs. I'll miss her. Vomiting, diarrhea, loss of appetite, abdominal pain. Oh, this is good. You're not spiraling.

Kate, you should, you should eat a bone. Yeah. I'm putting one in. I fucking will. Fuck. Kate. Yeah. Kyle, how's the mood out there?

Not good? The TV's off. I'm just sitting. Oh. Morning. It was a very slippery bone. It was. Okay. All right. How that helps.

This is weird. I don't know. I don't know what that is. It's kind of hard to try to even be funny. Is this how you felt when you pelted Mincy in the face? The police is coming Yeah, you're in big trouble I got it out the yak fans though are not blaming you that's good Some people are probably pissed no we just showed the pole I

Do leave my food on the floor like I'm not fucking slob. I thought dogs love bones But that was too small and too slippery. Yeah, they do but they like big bones. Yeah Also, maybe we can watch it back see where it went wrong Why is he sad he's like a cloud over him What's the matter man bad body language brain what's going on what you have to sit down let's all sit on it now we need comic relief in time like this No. Ew!

It just came back from the bathroom. Nasty ass. You with your nasty ass. I thought that made me feel better. It didn't. What can brighten the mood? What would make you feel better? The dog yacking that bone back up.

And then being like, don't worry, we got it. Dogs are fine. You already did that, and then you let it eat it again. Have it again. You already tried that. Mm. I didn't know dogs like that. Polinko day tomorrow?

Yeah. Are we doing letter? What's the letter situation? One more day of this? Run your letter back. Okay. I mean you could technically make the thing anything you want. Yeah. Try to make the letter fit. Mm-hmm. Do we want to have our same letters? I think we agreed to, yeah. Yeah. We just really, we're doing it so that someone gets antique. That's really yeah. Yeah multiple people mm-hmm I Think we probably hit double digit antiquing. Yeah, I have a twist on mine that I'm excited

I'm a feeling tomorrow's more antiquing day than playing. Yeah, really change every letter to make it get antiqued t is the antique Chae you trying to go back in the tunnel yeesh. I got it. Oh, no. Yeah, Chae What are you gonna do your for your wheel? Because are we running back Mr. Ice? Did you guys like that? I liked it. Other people got it. Yeah. I don't know if I would like it.

Did you guys like it? I mean, there's a 40% chance of something good happening. You get a Reese's, and you just get to hang out. True. But there's a 60% chance of Mr. Ice groin, which Titus got, and then. No, Tate got that. I think something more stimulating for the audience Something that makes the audience say like that was an all-time. Yak you know something like that

No pressure, but it's really up to you. Yeah, make it an all-time yak Something along those lines pressure is a privilege. I got it. Oh The one thing I love about Chase prep sheet is like the way he phrases things What was it? What is your stance on cornbread like it's so abortion? Where do you guys it's a controversial topic cornbread yeah stance Give it to me. I heard there were some stances out there.

Was it the Walker family? You heard me say I didn't want cornbread. No, I didn't hear, Caitlin said something about how you guys only like sweet cornbread or don't like sweet cornbread. No, no, no, no, no. The cornbread that is here today for lunch is sweet cornbread. I don't like sweet cornbread.

I like my cornbread to be savory. Salty. Yeah. Okay. So you have a stance on it. That's fair to say. I guess I do. I like, I like to, I like hot cornbread with a lot of butter on top. How controversial. Would you submit acts of terrorism for this stance? I'm not, it's not really a hard line. I'm not going to form a militia behind this stance. I'm not going to call arms to this stance. I'm just simply going to say I don't really like sweet cornbread. Sweet cornbread. Do you bomb a sweet cornbread factory?

Where is it? Baghdad. And it's run by Nazis. Yeah. Then no. The guy that made the Silk Road got released. And it's run by Nazis. Yeah, then no The guy that made the Silk Road got released yes I don't know anybody that ever used the Silk Road and is it just like a website or I don't know what dark web Is I read the book it was really like a lot of drug

Yeah, but it was I saw a screenshot and it was all drugs. Yes. That was the primary correct and firearms. I believe yes Okay, it's all legal stuff organs human It was all drugs. Yes, that was the primary you correct and firearms. I believe yeah, okay All legal stuff organs human human or I don't know Yeah, you look hard enough. I don't know anybody that's ever used the website. Well it was If you know any drug deal, it's a lot of them. Yeah he had a The FBI seized all his Bitcoin and in today's value is 18 billion dollars like you got it back yesterday He did so he's a release from jail and got pardoned by Trump. Yeah, and he's rich

He might be he's got the Bitcoin. He was like one of the early adopters to Bitcoin How that's how you bought stuff on Silk Road? Yeah, how does Silk Road work? He just created a website where people could trade and send each other drugs and all that stuff. How is that not so obviously busted? If you work for the FBI, you just go on Silk Road. It wasn't just like go to silkroad.com. It was like you had to have a proxy to get to the dark web. And so the argument for him being pardoned, there's a, it's like, there's a little confusing

part of it because he was alleged to put out a hit on someone, but then he never got charged for that. So I don't know how, why people keep bringing up, but essentially it's like a libertarian, like he's not doing any, if you're a libertarian mindset, he's not doing anything illegal. He's just creating a website that people can do. It's their choice to sell and consume drugs. And I think this was different than eBay because it held the money in escrow before you got the drugs.

Yeah. And I think the drugs were pretty safe. Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of peps spice. Interesting. Yeah. So I guess when it comes to drugs, it was the safest way because of like violence with deals

and stuff like right It the book was really good. I wish I remembered more I don't know enough to like have an opinion, but like it seems like on the surface something that shouldn't have existed But again what why if we're all free will if you want to do drugs then that's that yeah I know it's illegal, but like I I do believe that people should have and if it's the safest discord Right route right did the drugs come in the mail then yeah, wait. Yeah, that's where yes That's where it I Didn't think about that because like when the postal service don't they have like sniffer dogs every now like wouldn't people got busted

Oh, it's a felony to send drugs It is yeah, they'd hide it so like he's not doing the he's not sending drugs. It is, yeah. They'd hide it. So like he's not sending drugs. He makes the site. For drugs. But then you could make the argument the US government sells drugs and has sold drugs.

There has to be somebody in this building that's bought drugs off the Silk Road. I don't think so. I had friends who would buy Pep Spice because we got drug tested in high school And perhaps what you're gonna show up tested in high school. It's hard cuz I'm the Silk Road Wow, I can think of people that work here that would want to do the drugs I can think of people that work here that are smart enough to figure out how to get on the dark web I cannot think of anybody can do both want on Don PFT. Mm-hmm. I can think of two people. Yeah

There we go, maybe Smut ledge. Oh, yeah, yeah Puk it up Pat pats use the dark web oh Three people sent me Honey I'm ordering from the dark. I think I'm in favor of this guy gonna pardon though. Yeah, probably based on what I've known One life sentences plus 40 yeah, they went crazy on oh and uh You see you brought his prison plant with him Yeah, like I'm of the belief like I mean like the oxy crisis like the FDA approved that shit

Like the government is just as bad as a Random dude making a website. I guess ethically it'd be like if you had no intention of ever trying that drug But saw was available on Silk Road like I it's worth trying is getting freed He's so with this prison plan pull up what Kate just sent so he said this is a screenshot from abacus market a dark web marketplace where someone was selling parcel branded benzos He's like that's not me. That's not my account. He's like more successful ventures But he used the dark web for when there was an adderall shortage

I don't know if I could say that maybe he did I don't know He knows his way. Yeah, holy shit. He knows his way around stuff like this for whatever reason. Look at that. Are they like hating on people in there? I don't know. Cops gonna show up at Kate's house? It's because of the dark web? No, the dog.

I don't like bar school, but I like PMT, the Benzos. Is the dark web a specific browser? Or can you go there on like chrome or safari? I don't think you can just there's a couple like the browsers that you need to access dark web websites like tour browser On your browser. That's like where you start and then you could go to those things that I feel like I understand But if you ask me to explain it I I realize I don't understand me It's like a browser, and it's just bad website. It's like Yeah That's beyond me It's like a browser and it's just bad website. It's like Yeah

That's beyond me It wasn't ask Jeeves the book you can pull it up is it was a really good book It's about I can't remember the name. Maybe it's American Kingpin maybe. So no, I was way off. No, that's not it. It's probably multiple books about that was Silk Road about the actual Silk Road. I think it's American Kingpin. Yeah. The epic hunt for the criminal mastermind behind the so. So the way they caught him was crazy. So he was like, he had insane security on his computer and stuff.

So the minute, like he could press one button and it would just basically shut down his whole computer and it was so encrypted that they'd never be able to get it open. So they, he would go to a library in. Oh, yeah, I did read this local library and they basically Set it up. So like these two people two FBI agents were having an argument in the library and then another FBI agent came and and Like yoinked his computer while he was still well, it's still open

He just took it from him Yeah Yoinked his computer while he was still well is still open He just took it from him Yeah They just grabbed it and then arrested him that way because it while it was open was the only way they could get all The data and shit because he had a kill button that was like instant and they would never have been able to get it open They just swiped it from a swiped it from open. Yeah. Yeah, they had to wait till he was logged in They were like tracking him and stuff It's crazy So then he was just for the up until yesterday under the impression he was in jail for life life sentence like 40 years

Trump had said that Trump had gone to like the libertarian Convention and that's their big that was their big thing like get him out He know he gave it was in the back of his mind that that was yeah I think he I think he thought that if well, I mean he didn't do it obviously his first term, but Trump was endorsed by Libertarian convention cuz he like spoke at it and I think that Trump was always gonna be like he said if you vote for me I free him. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. so that's what he made good on that promise That's that feels like it'd be underrated one of the more exhausting parts of being a president is being pitched on

Hardens you should give out you see Joe exotic. Yeah, just hilarious. No, he posted an anime meme And that's a signature that's him What an incredible feeling it must be to be pardoned yeah, just be like wiped it all out Yeah, don't have to go back to court. You're good, but now he has to do shit Well, I think he's just rich if he got those pick I don't there's no way he got his Bitcoin. I think he just had like I don't think it got taken from him No, I guess I seized it. Oh, they seized his Bitcoin. Yeah I thought that was the point of Bitcoin. Yeah, it can't be really but they had his computer Oh, so they didn't have his login So he I don't know shit

I think he was logged into everything when he when they swiped the computer they make sure he was logged into everything Yeah, they came out of prison with billions They hacked his Facebook made a truth is status. Yeah, should we invent a cryptocurrency? I saw Dave talking about it today. I don't think so absolutely not yeah I think it's a really bad idea the cha-coin come on cha-coin well I mean what would be the end goal we were just good There's only one it's either you lose all your money or you Take everyone else's money. That doesn't feel like a right thing to do I'd rather of those two options. I'd rather take everybody else's money. Just be willingly taking all your fans money

Wouldn't we also need like a room full of fans? Oh, so he didn't get his money back a room full of fans What don't they have to like if you start a Bitcoin you need like a cooling facility for your all your computer engines That's like for for mining like if you're mining Bitcoin you need like heavy-duty computer equipment people have like warehouses full of computer processors actively running to mine but explain mining Bitcoin to me like I'm zero Mining diamonds there's a select there There's an amount of diamonds in the world And we just find it and then bit that means the Bitcoin are hidden. It's there's like energy

Usage that goes into yeah, there's Bitcoin that can be withdrawn from I'm not that deep into it. Yeah, that's kind of where my brain trails off on that That means someone has hidden the bitcoins at some point? Chase bank like a thousand times. I feel like we do this like once a year. Every topic we've covered we don't know anything about. Shockingly dumb. Didn't we have Caleb give us a full rundown on that?

Yeah, Marty. Bitcoin Marty. I bet you he's sitting pretty right now. The only thing this show does well is killing dogs. That's it. But we do that with the utmost ease Don't even really have to try Tate's dog died from ingesting bones, right?

But wait that has to be the exemption that proves the rule true the dogs fine All right, Kate, so what, let's play this out. If Layla dies, what are we doing? I think I have to, like, quit. Right? I don't know. I don't know. That could be your whole shtick.

I can't walk in here knowing I killed somebody's dog. Where else are you going to get a job? Now, wait a minute. You didn't kill the dog. The dog attacked your plate of food. Why didn't the dog attack our plates of food, Brandon? I guess. I guess you got me there, huh?

Yeah. That one hurts. Again, it's a pork rib bone. The dog will be fine. Yeah, dogs eat bones. Dogs eat bones. They've been eating bones for thousands of years. Oh, it was two.

Attached by like a thing of fat. So you retrieved three, lost two, so there are five bones in play. There was, I wanna say there's three bones in play. I got all three of them out, and then two of them went back in. Starved them right back. Oh, two of them went back?

Yeah, she got them all out. And then she looked proudly at everyone while the dog ate the rest. Oh, oh my God. Yeah, when I all out and then she looked proudly at everyone while the dog ate the rest That happened yeah fuck you have a good lawyer. No, I need do I need one? The dog signed a waiver. Yeah Yeah, we do need to add that to the waiver when like athletes come in if you have anything off the ground It's on you. Could twist your ankle could eat keep your dogs double rib bone Will you what do you think about Steven Singer? It's time to talk about our friend Steven Singer from Steven Singer Jewelers, the I

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Hi. Thank you. Thank you. I got a good update. I got a good update. The dog is fine. Lill is at the emergency vet. Okay. No, I'm just kidding. Oh Apparently Laila's a little bit of a slut. She's a bone eater. She did this two days ago, too Yeah, whose bone guys it's a dog is eating bones left. I thought I did that too these bones No, but you're not you're not supposed to have your dog eat bones not cook those they like shatter Yeah, yeah, Brandon you you seem to know a lot about keeping dogs alive Yeah They like shatter. Yeah, yeah, Brandon you you seem to know a lot about keep your dogs alive Yeah I've had many dogs in my life and most of them are alive half of them ended up to D

in the wake of a school bus And I wasn't driving the school bus You don't know this I was on a school bus once in fourth grade when the bus driver ran over my dog. And she was not apologetic. Pretty much, it explains everything about her. She still living? No, no, she died.

She was old then. This was like 1989. That's going to make you feel a little better. Yeah. Oh, mama went to her house. Mama should have hit her with the school bus. I don't want mama's wrath. I for an I.

Yeah, mama was mad. If you don't mind me asking, did you watch it get hit or did you realize after the fact? No, I saw him on the road. I saw it as we got closer. And she just went right over him. Could be worse, Kate. Did he walk away like an accordion from Looney Tunes?

No, he was dead. Kate, don't worry, the dog's going to be fine. OK. Bone eater. Certified bone eater. Caitlin said Layla did this literally two days ago. OK. Yeah, there's like a 70% chance it's fine.

OK, cool. But also the two days ago thing means that it could, if Layla dies, maybe not your bone. It could be the other bone. Who was the culprit in that one? I think it was you. It was another old plate lying around. Fuck. Ugh.

That's all right. Right. Yeah. Was it you, Brandon? Can I say a third thing? Yeah. Well, the dog wouldn't have eaten Kate's food if the dog wasn't at our office where we were.

That's real? Yeah. But she's good for morale. Everybody's pumped when she comes around. I love Leila. Yeah, you were very pumped. I know, I thought you were finally coming to me. It's like a sign you're a good person

when a dog gravitates to you. And you keep pork ribs around you. Or you get a barbie. Yeah, well then, yeah, I found out. Kids can start putting pork ribs in her pocket. Dogs love it. I am offended when dogs don't like me. I have a pretty good batting average,

but that one never has. That one never comes up to me. So you won't miss Layla. I think it's Leia. Leia, fuck. Wow, look at you. I'm not a big dog in the workplace either, but Leia does not bother me.

Doesn't bother me, but I mean. It was only when Malisek didk did it it pissed me. Yeah, because Malisek's dog ran everywhere. Barked. I once had an interview at a it was like a used appliance store in South Philly and while I was in the interview That there was a dog that like it was the shop dog or whatever and they're talking to me at the table and the Dog was just clawing at my legs I was wearing a skirt and I was trying to get the job so I didn't say anything and they like for like torn up by the end of the interview did you get a job at the used appliance store no no we can't hire her look at her legs 950 an hour no did any of you guys ever go in an interview and not get the job? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, like a part-time job. Oh

I did at a bouncy house place one year in high school Yeah, that's What was the question? You ever miss it not get a job I Would I've I've made it to like multi stages of the interview. Yeah, that was a nightmare After college I got into the second round of pharmaceutical sales And then they realized that you need to either be like a d1 athlete or a hot chick. Yeah

That's their lane. Yeah, I always see like football players getting into that Yeah, or hot chicks you go to doctors offices and Riz them up Yeah, hot chicks get those jobs where they just every once in a while like pop confetti and then they stand in front of balloon numbers yeah so many miles yeah and it's like a hotel in like Orlando yeah yeah yeah they're so good

at it is true hit my goal again, they always Yeah, and now and hot chicks do be hitting goal. Yeah, they to be hitting goals number one q2 bang Yeah, that is what they do. Yeah, like there are some girls on to college with you see their Instagram story It's just they're all they're crushing it Yeah, whatever it may be the balloons in the confetti tell you that. And it's like the slow mo reversed like yeah. Yeah. Good on them. Good for them. Good to try to be more positive.

We're still doing that. The dog's fine. The dog's fine right., I think so. I think so. 99% of the dog lives. I hope the dog's fine because I would like to just keep this memory of the worst underpressure I've ever seen anyone act. I'm not a dog for, I don't- I don't think it's the dog, I think it's the pressure. I didn't think that's how they operate. I'm not a dog for I don't. I don't think it's a dog. I think it's the pressure. I didn't think that's how they operate.

I could be cool under pressure. I do think we should do a stress test for Kate. Yeah. General like come come prepared. Row bunch of straight. Were you under pressure there? I'm a great disassociator.

OK. OK. I can really just go blank behind the eyes pretty easy. OK. I've dealt with a lot of like poop on the carpet, what's my next move. Yeah. I've dealt with a lot of those, and I'm cool. Poop can't die.

You're right. But what situation are you referring to? Hmm? Poop on the carpet. Kids, right? Just like I'm letting the big air out, run around for a minute, and next thing you know. Po hmm on the carpet kids right? Just like I'm letting kids letting the big air out run around for a minute next so you know It's a real who done it every time like it could have been anyone for the cat Pat it's a five pound Learn this tight is be amazed yeah

You're gonna learn this tight is be amazed. Yeah this I don't know cuz Brandon put it in my head today. I should just like skip town. Yeah, I should just leave Yeah, now it's time to time my dad did I Could I always have that luxury the worst one that you'll never be ready for is The the throw up in the middle of the night that you walk in the morning and it's just like oh my god because kids will sleep through throwing up in the middle of the night that you walk in the morning and it's just like, oh my god. Because kids will sleep through throwing up in the middle of the night and you just, the smell of just like six hour old throw up just caked on everywhere.

That sucks. And would you? I just told my wife that the kid threw up. When do you stop being paranoid? Yeah, when do you stop being? Like when you stop being paranoid like is my baby gonna throw up in the middle Uh, you don't know but like a year and a half when they can lift like a year when they can start lifting their head But then you have to start worried about them putting something in their mouth that could kill him Yeah, or bees or a button battery or bone them putting something in their mouth that could kill them like or bees or a button battery or bone

But yeah, no the when they can lift their own head is a big moment Because then you don't have to like watch them sleep and be like well you put them in this funny little spacesuit that they can't move in When they're a little baby, that's really cute. Okay. Yeah, it's Merlin the magic Merlin. We had one Yeah, they look like the stay puff man. They can't move anywhere They can't cuz when they're that young if they flip over they can't flip back like a turtle That shit's fun We've reached the point in her pregnancy where she's reading about how other men handle being the husbands and the fathers and all that sort of stuff Learning the bad things that they've done and then getting preemptively mad at me, saying, you better not do that.

Give me an example. Just like not, like in the middle of the night, she has enough friends that like they're, oh, I don't, my husband doesn't burp the baby at all. I have to do all of it. And then she'll turn to me and be like, you better not do that. And I'm like, I, we're five months away.

I haven't. So there's a lot of that going on of like, I have to answer for the sins of other fathers. Yeah. But I haven't, yeah. It's on the right track. What I'm saying is it's a lot of fun, guys. And also it won't go away.

It's a lot of fun. A lot of resentment. You gotta just, you gotta pick your spots. What a step, like even this morning, my son came in at five in the morning and I had to go back to his room and sleep on the bottom bunk Didn't go back to sleep. It's been up since 5 but like then When the house woke up, I was the hero. I took one for the team. I took that bullet

That'd be worth it. Yeah. Oh, yeah, I do a victory lap. No, I make it no making. Oh, yeah I'm yawning. I'm like I need my coffee I've been up since five. Yeah. Yeah, you got to really run those. Yeah Make sure she remembers every single time that you step up and then and let it be known you step if you don't Having like a photographer capture Blow it up. Oh, no, I made it, yeah. My wife was like, did you get back to sleep? I was like, God no.

God no. The score keeping is real. If you get four hours of sleep, you got none. Yeah, yeah. No, not even close. Didn't get a second of sleep. Do you ever lie? About going back to sleep?

Like if Pat's asleep and I'm up with the kids and they got up at like 6 15, I'm always like, they got up at five. Oh yeah. You got it. You got it. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Those are the tricks. And my wife's not a score game, but she's a, she's like an odds maker. Like she's already set the line for when the kids like a month old, you're going to, you know, I got the line at this. And I'm like, I, that's what date are you working off of? That is tough. But are you going to take a paternity leave?

I don't know. I, I, I took a day. Yeah. Probably take, I think the day the baby's born, I might go to the hospital, but I'll be back the next day for sure there you go Yeah, there's nothing you could do with a little yeah Just sit there. I think I'll be back But the moms need the support Be here oh my god you guys

Y'all don't want us around anyway don't don't don't front like that it honestly it comes down to how good the hospital food is It won't be oh you shouldn't eat that You could you're you're able to go yeah, you know you go get you're allowed to do that Yeah, you gotta let her eat whatever she's gotta eat, but you you couldn't go to like Ruth's Chris I don't know where everyone I didn't know if it was like I didn't sleep Oh, I don't know hospital. Can I get can I get her shit? Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah, you can order delivery there if you want Yeah, we'll do the hospital food just cuz she's just laying around. Yeah, who's eating hospital food? I love the hospital. I thought that was part of the experience. Oh that oil lid I didn't that's a so much better the chair do any that oh really I went home

I'm not I slept in the chair the first thing like an uber black is good enough to send her to the hospital in yeah Excel I mean prefer my third my wife my wife took an uber to the hospital for my third Oh, yeah, I was in West Virginia. Oh, that's right. I got there 30 minutes before he was born That's right All right These are these things are good to know yeah, you need to there's there's a lot of shit That's right. All right. These things are good to know. Yeah, you need to, there's a lot of,

when you get to the hospital and the baby's born, they have the nursery, just use the nursery. Say, watch the baby for you, and just be like, we gotta sleep. They bring the baby back when you need to, you know, breastfeed or whatever. And it might be yours. It might be yours.

Is that a real fear? Do switch ups happen? Switch it up. I feel like they have to I mean nobody's perfect. Yeah Steven's second child those is emergency contact. I Should be the godfather of your second child She didn't get baptized yet. Okay, so I still am in the running still time Something you want being chased. I kind of already am yeah all right What's the top responsibility of a godfather? He called me when she wouldn't they were going to the hospital? I was his first contact This is a true story

For this yeah, there was like there was like kind of an emergency situation I just need to talk to somebody and I couldn't be in the city called me I picked up I've calmed him down. I told what I tell you remember I think your wife is taking the ambulance and I was like is the are the lights on for the ambulance He's like no. I was like you're good Yeah, and they calm down, but yeah, it was a it was a weird spot I didn't realize that was that to Jay, and he's like okay. What's your stance? I would go to you maybe yeah, I was a weird spot. I didn't realize that was that to Jay. And he's like, OK, what's your stance before, Bryce?

I would go to you, maybe. Yeah. I was with that with Hank. I went to the emergency room with Hank. Hank had a kid? No. That was a drone? No.

This was like a month ago. What? Hank was having, he ingested like some ash. So he's having trouble breathing. And then he had a panic attack. And he called me at like 11 PM on a Monday night and was like, what hospital? Well, first of all, this just tells you

how childish we all are. He called me not to ask me what hospital he should go to. He asked me to ask my wife what hospital. The real adult in the room. Yeah, and then I was like, you can't go to the emergency room by yourself, so I went with him. I don't know, I guess I haven't told the story in here.

I told him, so we went to the emergency room, we got his heart checked out. Obviously the first second that the male nurse walks in, he just goes, whoa, Hank, what are you doing here? Fuck. We were there. It's about 3 in the morning. Oh, shit.

And then as I was walking out, I was thanking the male nurse. And I was walking down the hallway, and this woman in her like 20s was like, are you Big Cat? And I was like, yeah. And I didn't know where it was going. And she was just like, oh, my boyfriend is a huge fan of yours. And was like oh, that's awesome, and she's like yeah, he's right there He just got hit by a car, and I turn around it's a fucking guy on the on like the emergency table With his leg all work, and I was like what's up, man?

He probably thought he's about to die Hey, buddy He probably thought he was about to die. Yeah, he thought, just make a wish. Hey buddy. Am I in heaven? Yeah, that was our emergency room visit. It was quite a night. So Hank just got too high, basically. Kind of, yeah. Heaven's the best.

But I mean, yeah, I didn't want him to go to the emergency room by himself. That'd suck. But it was good that I was there because they did come and they were like, do you want an anxiety medicine? And he declined it and then I went in the hallway and I was like, what's that? And then he said like literally 30 minutes after he took it he felt way better.

So it was a panic attack. That works, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I guess his emergency contact tail. I did say when they were asking like, what's your relation to them? Because I was filling out his forms. I was like best friend Forever

BFF you just put co-host Mooc and White Sox Dave are eating an alligator tonight Damn near yeah, Zaws a part of yeah, they're any they're not stopping the stream until they eat the entire alligator Where do you get a full place in Chicago? They don't that's the one from the whole park with your house teeth Brandon what is alligator? I don't know what that is. It's just I don't know it tastes It is like oh, that's a meat that I'm familiar with yeah That's it. We had it in New Orleans like chicken

My question is why like how did this come about I have no idea challenge people are doing no Cool poster cool poster is a cool poster that's gonna be crazy stream. Yeah, how heavy is the Gator? I don't know Yeah, yeah, yeah what's about 12 pounds more probably See me once last time you ate a Gator a three pound Gator would be the sun your hand too, right? Yeah, that'd be a baby. That's a baby, that's a tiny gator. It's a lizard. Wonder where you start, if there's like, you gotta start by the...

I think I'd go middle out. Yeah. You see, I didn't realize gators, when the lakes freeze over, they just keep their snout out. Didn't know that. They like freeze, but they're alive. They're cold-blooded, right?

In place. Yeah. How would they be alive? That was a video. Yeah, right? In place. Yeah. How would they be alive? Yeah, because don't they need hot rocks to live? Look at this. This gator's snout is out. Yeah, I think it's dead. No, he's not.

Look at him move. They're cold-blooded, so they're probably just moving real slow. Watch. When's he going to move? How's he going to move? Right here. Is that beast stuck?

Hold on. Bang. He's moving. Is that just a water movement? I don't see his nose. on, hold on. Bang. He's moving! Is that just a water movement? I don't see his nose. No, that's him moving. His nose is right there in the... His nose is right out of the thing. He's breathing.

I don't know. Huh. Yeah, I bet they're hating this. I bet you he's like in a really cool state. Florida? Zendale? And I saw another video where they're like cutting a gator out. He was alive. Thanks, Carl. Those things are terrifying. Which is the bigger one? Is it

alligator or crocodile? Crocodile. They're meaner too. See? This gator's just breathing out of his nose right now. Why are they cutting him out? He's dead as fuck. He's not dead! Just an absolute amazing survival technique. He's just trying to give them a little more room to relax. Dead. Yeah. Oh my god damn. Why have you talked to him? Yeah.

Isn't that nuts? Howard admits when he first came to check on the Gators after it snowed, he didn't realize it was their snout sticking out of the water. And I looked around and I was like hmm, what is that poking up out of the water? They almost look like sight made sense immediately why they were doing it. And with the ice melting away today, this week looks much better, buddy. It'll be in the 60s. You'll be out in the sun, sun tannin and enjoy isn't that wild that's cool all right so they they are unconscious i think every their blood moves slower their heart beats a lot slower

well they take it all down yeah huh and then my algorithm got this guy did you guys ever see i think it's a year old or two years old this guy trapped the snowboarder trap that he dug him out that's horrifying that was one of the craziest videos I've ever seen. Tree holes, right? A guy skiing in the backwoods literally just turned around and saw a snowboard sticking. Watch this.

He's starting his skiing and he just looks back. Look, he almost went over him. I would have missed that. You alright? Oh my. You can fast forward. That shit's scary. I don't know how this guy survived.

Cause he's upside down. You alright? Yeah. I'd be embarrassed. I'd be like, yeah I'm good. He did say that. He was like, I'm good man. How long was he there? Hold on, I'm coming. He did say that he's like I'm good man. How long was he there? Hold on I'm coming. I don't know I went down a rabbit on this tree holes and it happens like every year to a bunch of because the snow around the trees

Is a lot softer and you don't see the hole till you go in fucking upside down He's upside down dude Because you go into the hole and your body flips as you go and people get stuck upside down and you like next to The trees and then people don't see him because the trees Clearly he didn't watch that, how to get out of being buried alive with him. Yeah. Is this not the most insane video?

That's fucking crazy. What the fuck? It makes me too, I can't. Skip ahead. Look at that, that's his arm. Staged. And they've become best friends. Which I think you have to do with the guy.

Look at him. This is his face. You OK? You all right? Been better. OK, you're good. You're good. I got you. Not really good. You OK? Can you breathe? Oh, yeah. OK. That's nuts. What?

Do more snow with the wrap. Yeah, okay, that's not what Okay, you're right. I'm good. Okay, okay Crazy or is he certainly on the precipice? Precipice of death I would assume so I don't even know how he's breathing under there Is it dumb to me to ask what he would die from Is it? Upside down would you pass out first or would you starve first? It'll be suffocation. How long would it take you to die in that situation? I don't think you're in enough of a hurry to get him out. There you go. If you don't have your camera on you, you have to just keep going.

Yeah, just be like, what's that? Yeah. That's crazy. Are people, what do people say? The skiing and snowboarding community needs better PR, I think, because I only ever see the horror stories. The good shit's not getting to me. I don't ever see just like the guys that are out skiing

and just having a great time. Just always fucking. Concussion, ACL tear. That's you see a snow tubing video come across your feed, you know somebody's about to fly. It's never good. Dangerous world. You hit a tree, that's what happened to Sonny Bobo.

It was Sonny Bobo. Sonny Bobo. Rest easy, Bobo. Has anybody talked about Mountain Dew yet? I did. You did? You talk about. No, but we gotta eat a Reese's. See how good the Reese's are? Yeah. Reese's peanut butter cups. Have one. Well, give me one. Who's got one? Titus. Give me a Reese's peanut butter cup with the. That hit. Hit your

hands. That was a good throw. Yeah, my knee. They're pretty solid, aren't they? They're fantastic. The chocolate lava big cup from Reese's. Try the chocolate lava big cup. They're delicious, and you can buy them probably close to wherever you are. This and crosswords are the best part of my day. The lava cups?

Yeah. So good. The Reese's peanut butter cups, anyway, are good. This little chocolate lava, they got it right. They added lava. They got it right. And it's the big cup too. Yeah.

Which is good, because it's more. It's bigger than the normal cup? Yeah. Yeah. Get you a Reese's big cup with lava in it. You going to eat all that? You want to split it? Yeah.

Do Lady and the Tramp. Yeah, Lady and the Tramp it. We're just but we're just gonna probably yeah, but it'd be good We can wait in the trumpet We get for the show if you lady in the tree. Why are we confident in yourself as a man? You are really a man this Reese's peanut butter. It was peer pressure. I would do it. Let's do it long ways Let's do long ways yeah, I'll yeah. What do you mean long ways? I'll take bottom of the cup. I'm just gonna break it.

Nah. Yeah, I'm gonna break it. Oh boy. Oh, and then I screwed myself. You did. I got a small, oh. You're not gonna give me that half, are you? Hmm?

You got lava. Oh no, lava chin. Lava chin. Oh, lava chin walker. I got lava jersey. Oh, God. Get that lava off your jersey. What's it on?

Oh, no. Lava on the sun. I would believe that. There's got to be. I would believe there's lava on the sun. Yeah, it's something. I believe there's a lot on the Sun. Yeah, it's something, yeah. That's good.

It's damn good, Brandon. Have you worn that Jersey Jersey before? No, I don't repeat Jersey days. Nope, Steve Nash from 96, 97. His first run with the Suns. Did he have long hair at this time? I believe he did. Okay. He's right out of Santa Clara. Is he have long hair at this time? I believe he did. OK.

He was right out of Santa Clara. Is he a handsome man, in your opinion? Yes. I say he's a unique looking fellow. Yeah. Yeah. Not classically handsome, but handsome in his own way. OK.

What's the bar he owns in New York where Tommy prowls? The gem saloon. Yeah. He owns the gem? I think so. He did. I think he sold it recently. I think that's where Tommy gets his

Pray yeah, that's where he runs is he still uh Doing a Premier League or Champions League commentary remember when he was doing that who's Tommy? Steve Nash on uh Was like TNT or some shit. Oh, I didn't even know that nobody I don't be watching that or some shit? Oh I didn't even know that. Nobody. I don't be watching that. No he's not. I missed it. Za am I correct? He came on as a guest. He's a big soccer guy. I believe he played, if I'm not mistaken, he played in college or something. He was very good apparently. Yeah. Like Canada? Is he Canadian or something? He's very Canadian. The US might be good in the World Cup, right Za? Yeah we're probably gonna win. Yeah I don't know about

that but. We have those two boys on Juventus. They're gonna be good. the World Cup right za yeah, we're probably gonna win. Yeah I don't know about that, but we have those two boys on you ventus You're gonna be good western McKinney and Tim we're Wow Huh that'd be cool. We should win the fucking love that that would be sick. It's in the US holding us back We should probably because Lebron isn't playing don't fucking win it. Oh my god. Yeah honest and goal Yeah Wimby and goal for when being Lebron isn't playing. He's gonna fucking win it. Oh my God. Giannis and Goal. Yeah. Wimby and Goal for us. Wimby and Goal. Oh, Wimby would crush for the US and Goal.

Oh, he'd be so good and Goal. Wimby and... Westbrook. That would be the most free Twitter interactions ever if you built, Oh yeah, I do it like once every couple years. But if you put Wimby and Goal on the graphic. Put Wimby and Goal.

Yeah. Make the list. Who's beating this US team? Shay Gilder's Alexander. Ed Field. Oh, man. Jokic is a defender. Can't get by him. SGA career high last night, 54 points.

Whoa. You had his under, didn't you, Shay? I did not. No, I didn't. How's the data doing? Good good up double digit units whoa? With mine damn it and there it all goes. Oh, yes, would you be up double digits without mine? No, I think it's like 10 and change right now. That's your double digit. There's a pop-up pop again Boy boy hard to root for you. Oh

Impossible yeah, what's the most exciting thing in the NBA right now, Che? Boy. Boy. Hard to root for you. Oh. Impossible. Yeah. What's the most exciting thing in the NBA right now, Che? The association. The association. What's the story? What's the... I mean, John Moran's really fun. He's playing every day.

Oh. Whoa. Can you turn to the camera? Hoody intrigues me, and I haven't seen it fully yet. Yeah, I like it. That's a good one. Good hoodie. Good hoodie. Yeah. Damn good haven't seen it fully yet. Yeah, I like it.

That's a good hoodie. Good hoodie. Yeah. Damn good hoodie. Something I'd wear. Roots of fight. Yep. Damn good hoodie.

Way to go. Thank you. Way to fucking go. Cleveland Cavalier is the most exciting thing in basketball. Play an ethical basketball, they say. They lost last night. Lot of passing, yeah. They lost by one with a bunch of guys out in Darius Gar Garland was like one for three for the line in the final couple seconds

Yeah, I like Jared Allen. I haven't seen a swag list dude like that since Duncan He's very cool He's a nerd though, but I like that but that seemed like two opposing ideals there Did you see the the fight the other day where Isaiah Stewart was yelling at, yes, some Miles Turner and said he liked Legos. Legos. Funny, funny diss. You play with Legos.

What? Because it's true. All right. Spin the wheel. Plinko day tomorrow. Yes. So excited. So excited. We might need more flour. Yeah. Only got two bags. If we don't have to attend a dog funeral. I wonder, will I get sick if I get antiqued? No you can't Oh shit Oh yeah

We'll get some gluten free flour for dinner That would be really funny Wet We're good What can we use instead of flour for you? I can bring my, I can be white I can bring my I can be what? Flour it's a lot tougher

salt All right, see you run tomorrow plinko day I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Happy Thursday, love you guys, see you tomorrow, bye!