The Yak - Race Day for Cons and White Sox Dave Will SHOCK You | The Yak 4-10-25

Episode Date: April 10, 2025

Big Cat accidentally bodied KB's NickYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. I'm the coolest one out of all of us. That was incredible. Hello, it's the Yak. Robak.com promo code Yak. 20% off your first purchase. Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. Robak.com promo code Yak.

It is race day. Woo! It is race day. Roback.com promo code Yak, 20% off your first purchase. Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. Roback.com promo code Yak. It is race day. It is race day. This is Danny Conrad's Christmas. Yeah. I couldn't wait for this, but I do have a list of excuses that will probably happen at some point.

Oh, we'll have to go through them before. Yes. It's race day, it's mini golf finale day. We got a lot going on Kyle and I hate each other now Check turn me on yeah, no Kyle just mentally bodied me in our match last night. Are we not on? That's just Ron. I'm not on I don't hear much Who did a name show is in here? I think they're touching our shit Can they hear us right now? Yeah, yeah? Yeah? I was headphones are gonna be hearing about

I'll talk to portnoy Yeah, you good Check check check Can't have this happen on race day Mike's on it's Mike's on yes, so I don't know why we're mine Mike is dead um Kyle Kyle bodied me mentally Mike's on yes, so I don't know why we're mine Mike is dead Kyle Kyle bodied me mentally last night. Oh my god, and then I accidentally bodied Nick Yeah, you bodied me no oh you body me out the worst he came out the world. Oh in the text exchange Yes, I'm talking about the golfing okay Kyle you body me in the golfing because you before we started golfing you were like that was way too intense for the first one

Let's just like have fun, and I was like oh, okay, and then Before every shot you took you said I'm definitely gonna miss this and then would hit it every time and it just got in my head He hustled you and then I think you did the politics aside. This has been a great match. You did say that. That one got me. Yeah. And then also when you were, when at the end you're like, oh, so we tie, so shouldn't we

celebrate too? That got me. That spooked me. The celebration, seeing you guys that happy, like now I want you to just win because I like you guys. If you're going to get that happy, then yes, by all means, I would love that. You got that happy over a tie.

Yeah. I just hated myself because I did take it seriously. I think it's fun when we take it seriously. I think people enjoy it. But you were just so funny and also like playing mind games that I was like, god damn it, it's so easy for him. Why can't I do this? Your mind games are subtle.

Mine are like, you're gonna miss this putt. I was freaking out though on the inside. I had to do that to release some pressure for me. Yeah. And so then Nick lost the whole thing because after I watched back the last like 20 minutes when I got home and I went to text Kyle and say your arms looked awesome, cause they did. And I accidentally texted Nick that

And I said are you lying? Yeah, and like fuck I was like shit That was for Kyle right and that's how I found out that I'm saved in your phone I think we're friends. I'm saving your phone as KB's Nick. Yeah, yeah, hey see all of that Yeah, it was bad all of that. Yeah, it was bad. All of it. Hated to see it. It was bad. I think I saved you as KB's Nick on the first day I met you. You saved me as pedophile Nick the day I met you. That's true, and then I changed it to KB's Nick,

and I don't have any other Nick's in my house. What the fuck, man? You're the only Nick I got. Stop telling me this. It's the truth. You should have, uh, now, Smokes? Nicky? I mean, that guy.

I think we work with like 11 to 12 Knicks. There was a Nick Slack chat that I was invited to. Nick is Nick Hamilton. Like Nick Hamilton is Nick Hamilton, right? Like that's a full name. You just have him as, yeah. Mulcahy, same thing. He's Mulcahy.

Yeah, right. He's my only Nick. I got... Pasoli. Pasoli's Pasoli. Right he's my only I got solely facilities for solely And I'm Nikki smokes according to page six is Chuck long Lee Got Chuck long lead government name Chuck long Lee That's like everything is quarterback is a quarterback skill

Chuck He's a gunslinger I didn't know his name is Chuck Longley He also sounds like he sounds like the white dude that will chamberlain scored a hundred on yes Yeah, it's an early Are you remember Chuck? He played for the Pittsburgh Barnstormers Will put a hundred on his head. Oh, it's a Utah jazz player if I've ever Just so bad at basketball 6-1 140 no he's tall oh he's tall awesome in college But it was because they he was playing

Yeah, like a smaller, and then he's a white white tall dude who just gets fucking crushed by the black. Yes, Chuck Longley Chuck just has to foul really hard. Yeah, he's a football player How do oh my literally a foe? He's Josh Allen That's yes. That's Josh Allen skill set Wow, is this actual name Charles Chuck, but why would the but page So I killed it no no Chuck long why would he not God

Just set on me. Also, Nicky Smokes is not a Nicky. He's not a Nick because it's... I do spell it. Ever since Dave did it once, the porn star spelling it. K.K.I. Yeah, K.K.I. It has to be how you spell it. But yeah, the golf... So, Nick, you were calling the whole thing. Just from a viewer standpoint,

it was so exciting. The match... The way that this is formatted this year is so much better. I know there was some pushback at first. I think Dave didn't understand it. But like, I was thinking about it halfway through the second round. That would be right about when I would have been

15 strokes back from Ryan Whitney. Yes, and then it's over. If we did it the real way, yeah. It's like, who cares? This is such a fun format. I think the champions pushed for this because they don't want any more champions. Oh. They had their champions brunch.

Who can win with the team game? I guess they had the champions brunch. They had a champions brunch. They had a champions brunch yesterday. Who are the champions? Whitney Kirk and Jeff. Oh, those boys. Yeah, I mean it's I mean it's a fun ass game and

the the drama is amazing but every putt is like you're giving a speech. Yeah. Yeah and we would KB and I were joking about it like mini golf is probably the most frustrating stupid sport there is because you take it seriously and then you miss a putt and then you're like oh how did you not how did you not avoid that huge Ryan Whitney bobblehead yeah right like you get mad at yourself the same level as mad on an actual golf course but you you missed ramping up his tongue yeah imagine imagine being as mad as you can be in front of that. Yeah, imagine Scottie Scheffler playing the 18th at the Masters.

Ryan Whitney's tongue is right in front of her. It's the worst. And it's the worst feeling, and then there's nothing you can do to like, there's no work around. You can't laugh about it. No. You just gotta sulk. There's beef.

I absolutely love that dude. Beef. Can we show the man? I the the beef clip from last night The saddest part was he went and took the putt again while there was just paying everywhere and then I saw him here He was here till late. He might be the kindest man I've ever met. Yeah He was here for two and a half hours practicing after that like the lights were off. You said he's ready to kill today. Oh. An angry beef is a scary thought.

Yeah. Big T coming up with a big putt. Good one, Big T. A good do-up. Yeah, Big T just kept on saying, that's why you're a Super Bowl champ. After making a four-foot putt around pizza box. Nerves of steel why you're a Super Bowl champ. After making a four foot putt, Rob beats a bot. Nerves of steel.

Just like the Super Bowl. Yeah. Coach Gruden, when Super Bowls can avoid the SS Portnoy ship that goes back and forth. Right. He doesn't have to be doing any of this. be doing any of this. And White Sox Dave tried to- he did a mini Kirk. I think White Sox Dave lost every hole he played and he's still doing it.

Can we show the video of White Sox Dave slipping? Look at this, this is so sad. What happened? He's finished the hole. He retook it while there was pandemonium. Look how happy you guys are. We are so happy. I want you to feel that again.

I guess multiplied if you win it all. And then we were getting tie shamed? Yeah, I thought you deserved to celebrate a tie. Well, it's- Hard in our face. It's- you gotta think about it. It's not a tie. I get it.

That was a good tie. Everyone's trying I get it. I was a good time Everyone's trying to get to 12 and a beautiful teams are trying to get to 12 and a half points So scoring any points is important. Yeah It was a damn if it was eight to four we this today would be the worst day of mini golf ever Yeah, it was this tie worth hooting and hollering over we won the tie Phenomenal draw phenomenal draw oh my god has many double he's a special boy oh my god he is so he and cons were like getting into it this morning I think they were mm-hmm wait really they both fully believe they're gonna win yeah and what was being said Dave was telling Whitney that he's gonna pretend like cons is not

even there while they're next to each other racing, Whitney replied that that might not be the best strategy, no one on one race. A lot of high school stats were being thrown around. Dave's big thing is he's saying he basically exclusively just runs on the treadmill and he's like, but I added 30 seconds to it. I don't think that's fair.

No. I don't know if there's an equation, right? I don't think that equals I think running in any way But to be able to help him a lot a miles for sure for sure But to be able to pace yourself is a lot harder than like yeah equal to they get stopwatches I think he is using it, but Dave Dave is so obsessed with the time All this just pays himself with cons. Yeah. Yeah, the pace is right there. Right.

You won't understand that. I think cons... Just be in front of cons at the end. But does cons beat Dave in a sprint at the end? Cons is saying that it's going to come down to pure competitive drive and he's going to beat him in that factor. Right. And I'm on record...

That's not a tangible thing. It is to cons. Yes, right. They are more alike than they really are. I think they see each other and Yeah, yeah, they see themselves inside of one another Makes them mad Me out of day I'm inside of you again. God damn is it in yet? Oh?

They're just the other drive into the track they need to fuck this out I tried to explain To my wife last night. I was like yeah, White White Sox, Dave and Conns are running a race. This is also very funny because it's like, when I get home and she's like, how was your day? I'm like, well, I choked the first mini golf match, but then I had a great comeback. It was a long one, babe.

I was trying to explain it too. It was so pathetic. I tried to explain her the scoring and her eyes glaze over and then I was like, and White Sox, Dave and Conns are running a mile against each other. It's like, this is just, this is not not real life trying to explain things outside of these walls It's so hard. I get like frustrated that I need to say more than one sentence

Yeah, like I'll come home just be like yeah, those two hate each other. So and I get why I'm like, are you fucking serious? Right so Denzel Washington. That's exactly what happened. She said why do they hate each other? I was like, well Dave thinks Denzel Washington plays the same role in every movie and Kahn's likes him. And then she looked at me like, what? Oh, fair, fair. And it's a blood feud. This will span, their children will hate each other. So naturally, they're having a race over.

Oh my god. Challenge. Challenge. Francis. He was like, I didn't challenge him. How you doing, Francis? I'm great. Good to see you guys.

Thanks for having me. Are you excited for this race? What's the race? Okay? Oh, yeah White Sox Dave and cons are on their way right now to a track to run a mile against Each other Wow. Yeah White Sox Dave challenged Collins to a race in an argument that didn't pertain to speed But it was about Denzel Washington. It started about that. Well, then it is about race. That's true. Oh, my god. Yeah, you're right. Can you pull up the challenge video again?

White Sox Dave just having his normal life, where he's like, any disagreement I get into, I can just say challenge. One of my favorite Barstool videos is Francis and Dave. Yeah. Get the scumbag.ool videos is Francis and Dave. Yeah. We're gonna get the scumbag. Your dynamic is, you guys might be polar opposites. Yeah, we're pretty different people.

Yeah. Did you enjoy your time with him? I do, I'm fond of him. I am too. Yeah, I have a sweet spot for him. And he's back. He has to win today, because if he doesn't win, he might not be back.

Him? Yeah. So Francis, this is a must win for both people why? The what they've invested into the argument They think of themselves. Yeah, they truly hate each other. Oh my goodness. Yeah, all right So here was the Genesis of it in a little bit damn Just parted in that's just his part. I think Dave's trying to wish baldness on everybody He's like he's trying to get everybody over to Turkey. Are you?

Exceptionally thinning Connor. He's bald me. I shaved my head. What do you like? So who are you fucking talk because I've already accepted that's who I am That's the lot in life. God gave me and I'm comfortable with Dave. Look my face I'm handsome you need the hair buddy I'll say that you need the air okay no way short you're short you're ugly you're overweight Dave I get it go to Turkey take care of the air but I have challenge Connor I will beat you in a one mile race. That's it. And then it's on. Challenge, Connor.

Thank God we don't live in an era where there's duels. Dave would be challenging him. He'd be slapping with gloves. That's like this alternate universe where somehow the cross country kid is the biggest bully in school. Like an 80s high school bully. Instead of like, I'm going to beat you up. It's okay, fine. You believe that? Let's race for one mile. Dave, like what a playground thing. Not faster than you. In a mile.

So yeah, they're on, they're in route right now to go race and we're going to have it live on the YAK. Excellent. I love these hijinks. It's going to be, we're track show have it live on the app. Excellent. Yeah, I love these hijinks. It's going to be we're track show. We are a track show. Yeah, we were talking about we are all truly in a pickle as to who will win because they're both so stubborn and so competitive and we don't really know physically what their deal. Do you have any insight?

Well, I know that White Sox Dave does run a lot. I think that's his primary means of exercise, which is why he looks the way he does. Yeah, there's no definition The Right only factor that could be an advantage right how often you run Yeah, and we're stuck because cons and I believe it I mean cons said that when he was in the army he did a two mile run that was like what? John's said that when he was in the army, he did a two-mile run that was like what? 11 minutes and something.

So he has it in him. You know, like that guy, yeah, it's 20 years ago, but he still has the natural athleticism that should produce a very fast mile. And he's just... He doesn't run, he runs twice a week. Strides. He said he like rucks, is that what it is,

with the big metal plate. Yeah With an ass but yeah Trend also part of the argument this morning Dave was saying cons was Saying that he was given his times for when he ran last and Dave's like that's 20 years ago But yesterday Dave was also saying well cons is in the best shape of his life. He lost like 25 pounds Oh, which one is it, you know? Yeah. Which, do you have the list of excuses? Yeah, because Dave already was like,

this isn't a challenge against Kahn's. I'm not challenging him what I'm wanting. It's a challenge against myself. So then he set a time he wants to be. Yeah, so Danny has, Danny speaks fluent White Sox Dave, so he has a list of excuses we expect White Sox Dave to produce. You're the foremost historian of the man.

Yeah, unfortunately. Dave will get caught up in the slightest technicality mid-race Example like cons toe will cut a corner and Dave will just stop and demand a timeout going We'll say he's had an acute injury the past few weeks. He's been dealing with that. He's just telling us about for the first time Okay, I can see that but I was so clearly like a hockey player after the playoffs You're like yeah, I've been playing with a broken fibula hold, but that's real precisely Yeah, I already said this before he's not used to running outside as much as he's on the treadmill in 30 seconds I don't think is enough to just add to your treadmill mile to your outside mile Well claim he never technically said he'd win despite the video evidence of him

Will claim he never technically said he'd win despite the video evidence of him Will say this track is ever so slightly different than the track he runs on normally Example this track has more pebbles on it. Yeah Will blame the elements but not typical element blaming. He will say something like it's too cloudy or it's not humid And then we'll say cons has been working out harder than him, even though he already knew that yesterday when he doubled down on the challenge. Right. Right.

It will be one of those. It could be all of those. It could be all of those. I think wind, he mentioned the wind a few times. So I think wind will be a big factor in Dave's excuse-making. Yeah, but like he, we can pull the tape. He also said despite the wind, he'll still be kind of correct. No, not doing it right now I don't think so. It's not windy today though. Yeah, but he'll find some we'll find something. Yeah

You know who's looking svelte is mincy looks good is he down 23 pounds, okay? He's fucking asshole. He told me about it five times Yeah, yeah, I thought he I could tell he was down because when I saw how his belt was Fastened there was so much of the part that comes through Loose just hanging around You know, yeah, it's like a trend used to be his belt is belt is decoration. Yeah, not doing anything Yeah, I think he wears his pants at like his kneecaps He's Fox too does he yeah, he tells me that yeah, he tells everyone that yeah Yeah, but he makes you swear not to tell anybody right because I think that's just because he wants to tell them. Yeah

Listen, I'm proud of him. I am too big time. I've seen what I've seen what he's done. Yeah big cat. I Big time. He's been on it either. I've seen what he's done. Yeah. Big Cat, I had an idea for content that I think would be best suited through your whole production situation here. I think you guys, maybe even relation to the Yak,

but I thought, and maybe this has come up before, but I thought we should do a Mr. Barstool. Oh. Bodybuilding company. Oh. And I then talked to Kyle about it. I reached out to mincy. I think, you know, we do the whole thing like full body tanner. Yeah, you know, maybe I love that. Do you hydrate themselves? He already told me we're become very bad in France. So working on

this big body building thing. Yeah, he was asking me about it yesterday. So I wondered if he might be even keeping an eye towards that. Wow. Mincey was self-tanner all over him. It'd just be so funny. I think the range of body types would be pretty funny. I think though, so we'd have to think, the only issue with that is I'm thinking about like, you're saying full Mr. Olympian. Yeah, posing.

You put on like the banana hammock. We could do that. We don't necessarily have to go that. I'm just saying, if Mincy's ass in that. I can't even picture it in my head. I think that would be the end of times. I just don't get it. I'm already grossed out by bodybuilder asses to begin with.

But then Mincy's tanned. Yeah. He'll be the first guy wearing a suit. I have to see it now. We have to see it. We could hire a couple true, you know, Mr. Olympia guys or whatever to be the judges. Yep. Or have them coach each contestant in the weeks leading up to it. Will you be entering this Francis? You know, I can or I don't have to. I don't know. I don't care. I thought

it'd be funny to have like Kyle next to Mincy. Absolutely. Who's in it. But you know. I don't care. I thought I thought it'd be funny to have like Kyle. Yeah next to mincy Absolutely who's in it, but but you know I would look preposterous with Tanner because I'm the palest ginger, you know Fourth after mook and yeah, yeah, you're not podium few of the others here Do they like answer questions the same way you would add like a pageant? Well, we would have to Yeah, it'd be a combo of mr. Olympian mr. Yeah, yeah a sash and a tiara, yeah How would you explain tariffs

He might know that yeah, he might know that He might know that. Yeah, he might know that. For Mincy, we would just have him do mental math, which is always the biggest... That's the best skill set of anybody in his office. You could just go to Mincy and just be like, hey, what's 38 times 16? He'll have it instantly.

That's amazing. Yeah, within seconds. He's got that in his bag. TJ, do we have an update from the guys? Ready when you are. No way. Oh, shit. All right, let me see the NASCAR ad.

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It's time. I'm gonna tweet out the link out. Yeah, it's time. I'm gonna tweet out the link. Yeah, it's time. I'm so excited. My heart is racing. I'm so excited. I truly do not know. Race time. I normally have like an instinct on something.

I don't have it this time. I keep flipping. Yeah, so do I. I was like very confident. It was Dave. So they're gonna run at the same time. They're there Wow well that makes things very different. Can they hear us at all? You're good. You can communicate something to you. I'm on the phone with them. Okay, all right So yeah, tell Eddie to get them set and we'll just go get going be some pre-thoughts first words. Yeah tracks a little wet

Do we have do we have a second camera view yep okay all right oh yeah oh my god I have like the nervous yeah I some a little bit we absolutely need an agreement on is it ready so let's save have one finger out I want Dave yeah yeah make sure Dave is gonna blast out of the game I think give them time to shit talk oh address me taking lanes. Oh, lanes. Here you go. Address me here so I can stay out of the way. Good.

Wait. Hey, Marash, communicate with TJ. I'm not talking. Yeah, they're on right here. Good to go. TJ, are they on? Yeah, we can hear you. All right.

You guys are on. You guys are on. All right. Good? Yep. All right, welcome in to the second annual runoff. We are in Undisclosed Park, White Sox, Avers, Cons. As you guys know, I can't hear you, but it's 40 degrees, no rain.

A lot of people. A lot of people, yeah. There's strollers, there's dogs, but no excuses. Oh. No excuses. Oh, that's delayed. I'm gonna do odds or evens, we'll just get this underway to pick lane. That was a lot of heat.

Perfect time to check my email. Since he is a chall got one or two I'll take lane one there's so many people yeah Yeah. Oh, all right. Oh my god. Are we staggering it or not? No. What's your lap? And how many laps around this is a mile? It's four, I believe. Is everything good? Yeah.

Ready, set, go. Oh, Dave. Quick start for Dave. It's over. Oh Chase on it over. Oh, is he gonna blame? So what's a good first lap? He's at six Oh hell yes, we got the scooter. They're too fast for it You think was over for Dave he didn't say who was over for You think it was over for Dave? He didn't say who it was over for. Yeah, it's gonna be a fast lap. Che, who did you think it was over for? Dave. Dave Dave wins in a landslide.

Wow. So 137 would put them at six minutes and 30 seconds. They're both fast. They're gonna beat that by a lot. Is Con's strategy to just basically draft him and then try and make a move with Ian? I think so. I think he's gonna mentally outlast it. Yeah, a little pom-pom on Dave's head.

Would Khan's be the type of guy to pull up with a hammie? No. There's Marash. I know Dave was asking all of us for pump-up music upstairs beforehand. He didn't have his own. No, he didn't. All right, one almost one lap done. These guys are going fast. He didn't have his own. No, he didn't. All right, almost one lap done. These guys are going fast.

Oh, there's a scooter. There's Rutledge. I think he just wanted to go have fun. This is great. Does Kahn's look winded? Yes. Dave looks happy. His phone is flopping.

Dave's feeling confident. That's a fast first lap. Is Kahn slowing down? No, I think that was just a a fast first lap. Oh no. Is Kahn slowing down? No, I think that was just a really fast first lap. And Kahn's strategy was to pace himself. Oh no. My man. If Dave blows him out, Dave's going to be the most back he's

ever been. Yes. Dave could blow him out. He looks comfortable. Dave is fast. This is what I was saying before. That's my boy. He could totally flag. Yeah. Oh, yeah, he's looking back. It's confirmed for laps I believe I mean it doesn't matter if they run a little less than a mile right like the same thing same I died

Not to Dave. Oh people coming up. He's got to get around a big crowd here. Where's con? He's really slowed down now though, but he's doing it because he knows he's so much. Oh, Konz is dead. Oh my god! Konz's dead! Konz is a gonzo! Dave is coming! What the fuck?

Child! It's over! It was one lap! Konz is dead! That's a marathon pace. White Sox Davis killed Konz. Where is, is Dave gonna lap Konz? Oh my god.

Is this strategy or is he hurt? Oh my god. or my god I? Feel so vindicated Con now now I'm kind of bummed because I would like to see how fast Dave could actually do it And now he's not gonna. Oh, he's putting his hands up like he did the Jordan shrug Cons is dead what is he hurt? Yeah, did he pull something? Oh, no Dude, Dave is fast. He's got like a ginger step to him not David Dave's gonna go I want him to like he did that second lap in a minute and 35. So what was his first 115? Okay?

Like when is cons gonna start the run? Oh, there's no shot. Is this like a tortoise first a hair thing? Oh, he looks no. He's gonna try to sprint. It's too. It's too little To be that's a really slow pace. He might lap him faint now. We got a roof for a lapping Yeah, we have a walking lapping How was he this confident yeah, I don't know Well, the issue is obviously that for that pace was too much for cons and Dave It's like the reverse of what you're supposed to do. Yeah, Dave just gassed him out. Yeah Always gonna Dave's gonna talk. Oh man

My boys Who picked cons I did My boys Who picked cons I did Fucking lied to my face Danny, who'd you pick Oh No Con said 100% chance of winning who picked white socks saved me and Che I picked I was on the hunt for that. Okay. I said he's been running. I was gonna say that if yeah He looks like one of those hundred year olds where they're like he's hasn't missed a day

He's running every day That's not running that's dying. I Was convinced this was gonna be like neck and neck the whole time you were right cons maybe is a lot more like white sex Dave than we thought yeah point in bluffing if he knows he's that out of shit I don't 100% I don't think he bluffed I think he thought he could do it and I think he's I think that first lap killed him he's got at least sprint for a little bit he was with him on that first lap cons told us some fantastic lies. Yes. All right. I feel betrayed.

Is Dave tougher than the military? Oh my god. I'd like to see Dave break six minutes if he can. That'd be very impressive. That's Dave's real goal to get sub seven. Well he only used to do, no, it's sub seven? Yeah. He's gonna do that.

Oh that's, he's got that in the bag. I think he could get sub six if he ran a quick one here. He said if he didn't get sub seven he's gonna kill himself. He did. Yeah. Well what, what's cons pacing at? Look at this guy Oh My god, I thought Dave was gonna be oh do you think cons is gonna finish this right? Is he gonna be like all right? Well, he's gonna say hand. He's like kind of power walking

I pulled my hand me, but I'm a warrior and I have power. That's not just a walk of shame. Kans is all the way, so he's a half a lap in front of him. I wanna like call Kans, give him a pep talk. Look at that phone flap. Looks like an elk. Devastating for the U.S. military. Yeah. That's tough.

White Sox Dave did say that he his life is worse than war What What was he thinking you have to at least know a baseline was so confident I think he thought he would stay with Dave and that was too much That would have been incredible Dave and that was too much Been incredible That's she's oh my god All glory to White Sox Dave

It's a great day to be a White Sox. It is like he's probably thinking that he's looking at the city You know it'd be the greatest thing ever is if Dave continued running and helped cons to the finish Like that dad in the yeah, con starts crying on his shoulder. What a beast Six thirty oh my god, that's what he said good shit Dave Congrats Dave cons There should be a guy with a tuba Right now cons is running the way where if you drove by him on the road you'd say good for him. Yeah, he's out there At least he's trying something at least he's doing it. Yeah, this is like that's a January 1st kind of jog This guy just lost a loved one. Yeah, he's making major changes in his life his doctor said he had high blood pressure He's like all right fine. He just had oatmeal just gonna have to eat some Cheerios and run He just had the wake-up call he needed needed Oh look at him. He's just sitting there. I feel so lied to and betrayed

I don't I feel like that was exactly I didn't expect cons be this bad But I knew my boy white socks David put out where is he yeah? He's a beast cons is like an elliptical well. I thought a 630 would maybe lose to cons The way he was talking look at that guy guy just high kneeing next to him. What do we think cons is gonna say? I don't think he's gonna be able to talk for a while. There was a moment yesterday when he was talking he said if I pass you Dave and that's when I thought it's a wrap for this guy like if he doesn't think he's ever gonna be passed I thought whoever's gonna be out first in the first 50 yards is gonna win it I'm gonna spin

this like he could go further where is he gonna spin it like he knew David when he's doing like a charity event I wanted to help yeah we're gonna get them both back here what's his time eight something well back do over here oh fight fight all right just tell tell them maybe closing remarks, and then get them back here That's rejected yeah, I don't have it in me to run faster That's predicted yeah, I don't have it in me to run faster bad hands This is like a free Friday They're the same person yeah, all right bring them back

Come back Dave's back. He's so back TJ tell him to rush back so we can get him here. I want them both on the mic. Yeah, it's like a 25-minute drive-in. Yeah. It's closer than that. At no point did Kahn go, like, turbo mode or anything. He wasn't even trying. The hammy is so sad.

It was wire to wire. It was a massive, massive victory. Do we have where Kahn's, like, slowed down, where he tweaked his hammy didn't even touch his leg I think the tweaked hammy is oh shit. I am nowhere near as fast as this speedy. Did he not stretch at all? That was crazy There's nothing worse than white socks Dave saying I told you so but no this is what we needed Danny He's never been more bad I know when they're gonna win he's back we we are relationship think about think about where we were ten days

Dead and he said when we asked him when I was like if you don't want to talk about the white socks talk about baseball He said that's just boring. You're right. He's just he was he didn't he didn't want to participate He is this is gonna do wonders. He's put together seven days now cons is his mortal enemy. Yeah, and he vanquished him vanquished Oh, he's imagine that feeling I've never vanquished a mortal enemy. Oh my god Yeah, that was like the defibrillator Dave needed. Yeah He might be the fastest one in a parcel is Is cons daver than Dave he might be white socks con very well could be now. It's white socks cons and Captain Dave. Yeah. Yeah. Yes Yes, it is. I mean immediately going to the hammy is that's right out of White Sox these playbook

The they are exactly alike. Yes wildly competitive. I know that much Is he the fastest content person at Barstool? in the miles Super super fast, that's true I only do treadmill cuz you run 630 mile. I do sub six Okay, so it is much easier on a treadmill, but he said he's 630 on a treadmill. I don't think I could be Dave I think he just had do you want to try no? What would you do if you lost him, but I had to say something Yeah, you did know that was good. You didn't even say anything you just made it. I think it would be a good race. Yeah

Sure, I don't want it. Yeah, I don't want to take him on now unless Dave's We got to get him to challenge Well, let's see how he is when he gets back here Any anything you say he could just throw a challenge you at any point? That's a that's the fear you have with white socks Dave in your mitts. You could just be in a challenge I'm terrified of that. Yeah So he's won one. He's lost. He lost what four in a row? Yeah. Yeah, he was coming off four losses So I think his last win was a banana bread again chef Donnie and then he just stopped making us banana

bread he said even though he doesn't every three months yeah six weeks yeah every six weeks he makes banana bread and that was a year ago you said it perfectly like Dave just went through a month-long banana bread phase yeah so he just like averaged it out to I make it you know five times. He made 45 banana breads in the month of March. And spread it out. This is good. I think he's, I think he hibernates in the summer and then the winter. In the winter. So he's back now. He was, he was gone for a while. This has been a while that he's been gone. Ever since you told him. That was two years ago.

It's my, it's my fault for not realizing that we had lost White Sox Dave for the amount of time we lost him. We can't let him play the humble Victor. No, he's gotta be a dick about it. Has to be. I think he'll play humble for camera, but as soon as they're off, he'll be a dick.

I'm afraid he's gonna get out all his juice in the car right back. Yeah, we should've separated them. Yeah, separate them. Fuck, I'm gonna tell Eddie gonna get out all this juice in the car right back Yeah, we should have separated. Yeah I'm gonna tell Eddie right now. No talking Do you think if the if white socks Dave clearly like let up a little bit once he was you know far ahead? Do you think if white socks they went balls to wall? I could have lapped him. Yeah, I do. Yeah, it could have went faster. Yeah Can't you have to walk home tell him get out that car. I just don't understand

You have to have some inclination of where you stand Running wise yeah, like if he says he's a hundred percent positive on anything else you just never believe him now They're the same He's he is he is It's a name's got to kill whites. It's's gotta kill cons the most you're no different than white sex They should see only the only difference is your father which white socks Dave says sucks disgusting You're a slower white socks Dave with a kid

Day with a kid Oh I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.sterisk on the victory. Yeah. Yeah, that's good. Yeah. Cuz cons might just dedicate the rest of his life to trying to get back in shape to be able to beat him. This could be the start of part two. See cons uh cutting

his legs off to become the Blade Runner. Yeah. Oh man. Murder his wife in the bathroom. That's right. I'm so happy about White Sox Dave. He's just, that in the bathroom. That's right. I'm so happy about White Sox Davies That's my boy. It's nice to see your boys get a big dub Yeah, and he just he surprises you when you don't expect it This is like getting your dog all riled up though. Now you have to deal with it The zoomies for the next We don't let him on the furniture.

Just moves to Ethiopia to train. Oh, man. Dave. Francis, how's everything going? All is well, yeah. Things are good. Are you on tour right now? You know, just hitting some cities here and there, yeah. You guys are coming to Chicago soon, right?

I'll be in here. I'll be in Chicago first weekend of June love it Zanies like Thursday Friday Saturday, probably Wednesday too with SAS. No, just me it's sass been going around with you No, we haven't been Co-headlining at all. We were supposed to do that like I don't know six months ago but I Became too depressed and had to drop out of that. So then he just went to all these places by himself, which are such depressing places. Oh no. And he went alone. I felt bad. But uh, you know,

so now all's well and uh, things are good. Yeah. Son of a boy. Dad's been really fun. Yeah. I mean, I was was we were talking about it yesterday. You and the UN SAS dynamic makes you laugh. It's unbelievable. SAS will argue with anyone about anything at any time. And you're usually game for it. I saw that clip today of the he was critiquing your air drumming.

Well, he just thought that he thought that my bass pedal was out of time with my hands. He didn't understand that I wasn't trying to do it, like, just exactly as, like, a bum, bum, bum. I was doing a bum, a staggered beat, you know? But he couldn't hear that. He couldn't see and connect the... And so he just assumed it was wrong.

Find the clip, because it's just... It's pure sass. They'd just be like, you're air-drumming his sock. Have you won an argument against him? Yeah, definitely. I, he's claimed the big one was that in the, when he drives in the left lane on the highway and he says that if I'm going 10 miles over the speed limit, nobody should be passing him on the right. That's crazy. And, and that if they

are, he's not getting out of the left lane because he's already going fast enough that no one should pass him. Oh, did he concede the victory? No, my God, no. But he's wrong. I said, why are you camping on the left lane? And he goes, because where are people going that they need to get there that quickly?

Jesus Christ. Because he's in the state of Washington. I was like, dude, you don't have any jurisdiction there. Yeah. Your speed setting should not apply so far from home. Oh my God. Washington I was like dude you're you don't have any jurisdiction there. Yeah, your speed setting should not apply so far from home. Oh my God. Traffic cop. Yeah. Also just a dick move to camp out in the left. People were mad at him about that. Yeah. I mean I've taken a lot of L's on the pod but that one was pretty clear. What was the biggest L you

took to him. Oh gosh. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. He, you know, he's funny. Yeah. So he can argue and then like beat you and then make you look stupid. Yeah. Right. Cause he's so firm in his belief. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's hard to argue with someone who's just like, I am right all the time. Has he ever like said you're right? No, usually what will happen is he'll assert his point. I'll have a counterpoint and then we'll argue and then at some point in the argument, he switches to the opposite of his point and argues that without acknowledging that that's what you were either saying or is now completely defeating his original point.

Just moving the goal posts. Or like switching fields. Play a different sport. Has he ever intellectually bested you? Probably. I'm sure there are things that he knows more about than I do, I would say so. By the way, I love arguing with him, but he is smart.

Yeah, no, he's very smart. He's very smart. There are certain things, you know, he, someone made this point to me, which was that if he weren't a comedian, he'd probably be like an electrical engineer. Yeah. Huh. He's incredibly good at wiring and weird things like that. He's good at wiring?

Yeah, like wiring electronics. I think he knows how to kind of fundamentally dissect his PlayStation and fix things. That's crazy. He's good at that. I went fly fishing with him once and he's incredibly good at like tying flies and some of the intricacies of setting up rods. And I guess you'd think that makes sense given how much time he spends doing it, but I'm sure there are a lot of fly fishermen who don't yeah really know all the The ins and outs of like the gear and and don't tie their own flies or whatever. So

That was cool to see he's very dexterous. Yeah Yeah, do you have that clip TJ? of the drumming the like the that clip TJ of the drumming. Do the like the ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch awesome right you know and get that that pro move but your your foot is not your foot wasn't meeting up with the now yeah there's no you aren't aware I could do the same thing you're tired really you're like I'm going Bones bones bones bones Yes awful That clip ends I would say I probably took an L at the end of that clip because I said he was I was like, what do you drama or something? He said rock and I said Do you even know the time signature of rock and he said Four four which is correct. I didn't know that he knew time signature I thought I was gonna stump him with that and then he nailed it

So, you know, he's always he's always surprising that he just watched like whiplash or something I he was in band he was in middle school or something. Okay, so I think he's played some instruments. Maybe the clarinet came or what he said No way. Yeah Squidward a That's a funny visual. Mm-hmm. I'm playing the clarinet Picturing him here at DePaul makes me laugh all the time. Yes, you went to DePaul. Yeah for a year. Yeah For was it a full year semester? He was in the improv club like a dorm pizza party. Yeah, I can't full year? Semester, I'd say. Semester.

He was in the improv club. Like a dorm pizza party. I can't picture him in a lot of settings. No. No, it's hard to network an event. Anywhere but what he's doing. Yeah, right. Even the electrical engineer, yeah, that doesn't work.

I could see that. Like, even the fishing throws me off. Really? I know he's good at it I know he's super talented, but just seeing him he's obsessed with it I know, but it's just I don't know I think you'd be a lead as an electrical engineer solely to Just have utter disdain for anyone who doesn't understand what he's doing there you go. That's dude those fields love that yeah Like he could be a great control room guy. Oh my god. Yeah, I've been like, huh? You don't know how to fix this What the fuck dude?

guys How you feel about mini golf today Francis? Oh good. How'd you play yesterday? Not great Played with him before this He's so good Don't let he's he He's the mental games. You are unbelievable. It's every tee off. There's no stress. It was no every long putt is in. Yeah. But that's just that's just not giving a shit. You know putting freely. As soon as the cameras are rolling and Kirk is watching me you know potentially let us down. Ien up you get you get tight you breathe poorly and it all becomes a lot harder

We're in posses short pots become a lot more difficult. What's been the hardest hole for you guys? All of them. Well, I think today we're gonna have to go through the the hey dude shoe. Yeah, I think the tongue as well It's the putts that are Kind of short but not too short and they're right off by the rim Yep, and the rocks credit to Hank in the in the crew they added the rocks this year And you don't get relief off of them last year. We did so everyone was it was like the easiest mini golf ever If you get up against the rock you're fucked yeah, so I think they're gonna add more rocks today I think they're gonna ride more rocks. I'm just gonna put rocks everywhere

Damn, did you guys talk about the the gene tossing cup? No we oh yeah No, we didn't but I I think Kyle I Can close my eyes and see Kyle throwing jeans really far well Kyle on the pod yesterday. I guess came out today see Kyle throwing jeans really far. Well Kyle on the pod yesterday I guess came out today you said that this one guy would drive as far as you could throw jeans to go to the bathroom. Yeah. Instead of walking. It was that the bathroom was that close. And I didn't couldn't visualize how far that was we had a jean we had a jean off today. Oh you guys did it. We filmed it. Oh. By the way throwing jeans sounds like a cool way that black people would describe coming

Yeah, right I once heard a buddy of mine his name is Monroe Martin. He's a comedian. He he goes. Yeah, I was splashing in her guts Oh my god, what does that mean? And they are in the guts? Yeah, they did that is true If I said I was in her guts, I would think you like went in through like her c-section scar yeah Playing operation yeah Yeah, Nicky smoke says that shit yeah I don't like it Italian say yeah, he makes sex sound horrible and gross He says shit about sex it like you can smell when he says it I don't like it. Italian sit. Yeah, he makes sex sound horrible and gross. Mm-hmm

He says shit about sex it like you can smell when he says it. Oh Yeah, I'm gonna get in those organs. Yeah Rearranger organs. Yeah Real real lovemaker. He looks up with two two different girls in one day and he said he was twice baked. Oh Fingers under my nose said twice baked. Oh, yeah. Put his fingers on my nose said twice baked. Oh, I made that up. I hated that. So that sounded real. Yeah. He'll probably do that. It sounded incredibly real. He's deviant. Really? One word pervert. They really need to rethink. There we go. Yes. I want to take that very, there's going to be so many people. You're absolutely right. Trans people should not. Oh, that's great. Yeah. Let's bump that. I told, I told that he do not let them speak and he said done. So we're going to get the

rawness of that post-race white socks. All right. So yeah. Hey, dude. Hey, dude is, uh, sponsoring the mini golf finals in Chicago tonight from warming up on the range to sinking putts on the green or just kicking back at the clubhouse. The new Hey, dude, Wendy and Wally golf styles have you covered designed with a grippy lugged rubber outsole golf inspired features and Hey Dude signature lightweight comfort. These shoes bring effortless style to every swing. Hey Dude Golf Styles drop exclusively on heydude.com in May. Sign up now to be the first to know at heydude.com slash golf. Hey Dude Hole. Look at that.

It's going to be electric. If you take the names and faces out of it like one guy runs regularly another guy said he does striding a couple times a week Yeah, we should have seen it coming. Yeah, that same guy said there's a hundred percent chance And he had an impressive marathon times Got a pull up with a hammy We have it. Oh you said that yeah, is there a distinctive moment where he yeah, yeah, we play that Tj That might be where no I look there's no moment where he touches his leg Pump up music upstairs beforehand. He didn't have his own see I think it was just Dave was so much faster than cons expected

Yeah, Kate would it be like cons to fake a hammy injury like he knew comment. Oh That answered it her lane is dead. I was more yes than yes. Yeah, what's the military equivalent of faking a hammy injury injury? You get like a my gun jam lie about getting shot. What is it for a free beer something sure yeah dishonorable discharge You get people get shit on for having like fake sick chits, so like you're a sick chip it but He's not that He pulled his hand me Yeah, so he's hopefully they're not watching the show no, no, I'm saying because we have to believe that he did. Malinger is the other thing.

Yeah, could we make him do something physically to prove that his hammy's not actually injured? Oh, yeah. But then he'd pop something? Run over here real quick. Yeah. How could we make him jump on something? If he's limping, that's going to be bullshit.

He doesn't touch his leg in the first lap, and by that point it's over. Yeah. Where is your ham, someone show me. Hammy is the front or the back? It's the back, okay. And that's usually grab and you pull up. Yeah, if you pulled that,

you're probably at least coming to a full stop. You're quitting, right? Yeah, I've pulled the Hammy before, it sucks. He said tweaked. Tweaked. That's what we're gonna get hung up on. Yeah, that's true. Tweaked Ham That's what we're going to get hung up on. That's true. Tweet Tammy.

What's their ETA? I'll ask. We will see. ETA. Great run for a dad though, Conz. That was... Kate. That was nice.

He lied to your face. He still got out there and did the thing. That was nice. He lied to your face Oh God out there did did the thing you trusted him not a great run That warms my heart more than you could know Who tweeted that oh My god the Grinch smile. Eddie. Oh, he's so upset. His hamstring is fucked.

No. Yeah, you can see how it's fucked. Look at that, he's grimacing. He's, oh my God, I hope he's okay. That's a... Yeah, he totally would have had that Kinds never recovers from this right not the hamstring. I don't know what he can do Oh, I'd like to save has it over him every time they ever get an argument, right?

I'm faster than you fucking dusted you and then if he Collins wants to challenge him again Dave can just say no yeah Not only faster, but like significantly faster that was a what a minute and 40 seconds faster Yeah, and cons is bald more aerodynamic Hmm yeah I need their ETA I need their ETA. I worry about cons. No you gotta you guys keep thinking about it that way oh Wait don't say anything till White Sox Dave gets here. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you could tell. Oh, here he is. Come on back in.

Dude, dude, Eddie, there's another mic over. Is there a chair behind you, Danny? Or no? No. If you grab a chair, there's another mic over is there a chair behind you Danny or no? No if you grab a chair There's another mic behind Danny that you can hop on Or you can go in the booth Yeah, if you go in the booth you can you can hear it and chime in fellas first of all Congratulations, you're my guy. Thank you. I think it was only me and Che who said that you were gonna win Kate had my back a little bit. Hey, oh, yeah Kate and Francis also Francis everybody Francis and I followed to follow each other on Peloton. Yeah, so I think he probably had a decent idea

Did you think? Did you think it was gonna be that easy? No, I didn't but in like the second or third lap I turned around I'm like where in the fuck is he? I thought he was doing the tortoise in the hair thing so I started slowing down Think I could have nudged about a 610 615. Oh, of course you think you're beat. Yeah easily you're a beast Yeah, sorry for wasting everybody's time though Was that not like the most anti-climactic thing of all time I loved it because I was rooting for you and you did it.

Thank you. And you did say afterwards that we need to reassess our military standards? We do. Yeah. I feel like somebody who wasn't watching the race could take that the wrong way. Probably. I'm sure there's a lot of freaks in my mentions right now. Maybe so.

Yeah. Yeah. Cons? The defendant has the floor. I'm sure there's a lot of freaks in my mentions right now. I know maybe so yeah cons The defendant has the floor yeah credit to Dave, okay Do you do has it set in that your life is forever changed? Yeah? No, this is not good. Yeah Yeah, they're like I lost to Jack McCarthy and that basketball thing. There's come to Jesus moments. I hope this was yours Losing to me in something that doesn't happen often so What's not the best look? What do you? What do you say for yourself God?

There's nothing to be said do you do you need a running buddy? I can I have referral codes I can get you a Palutena hundred dollars off I don't know your financial situation finance them via a firm you can pay about a hundred bucks a month and we it's a great you know accountability system I use it with other people it's like hey get your ass on the bike or the tread today if you need that I'm here for you for that Wow she's really really kind That's so nice. What happened, Kond? You promised 100% victory.

Yeah. Were you bluffing at all? Like, did you not? No. I thought he was bluffing on the second lap. I'm like, he's going to like turn on the jets. F-16. Yeah.

It's going to sound like an excuse. No, never mind. Well, we heard you are. Yeah, you already said the hammy. No, I definitely, like you could see, you could see in the second lap where. I think a few of us could see. You can see a little like, not a no I definitely like you could see you could see a second lap where I think a few Of us could can see a little like not a pool, but like a tweak yeah, and then you pull up a little bit yeah So I mean 40 degrees and 40 years old is not a good recipe all right, so all right

But what about that West Point like? Mindset and I mean run on that. Yeah, I didn't quit Hudson River. Yeah, you can't account for an injury in a competition. I didn't think you could account for mental toughness in being a ranger and all that either. It's a fair point, but yeah, I think just, I think it would have been a little different. I got a question. So before the race started, Danny had come up with

what he would think would be excuses White Sox Dave would potentially use if he lost the race. The race ends and you said, my hammy. Has it dawned on you that you and White Sox Dave are the same person? In some ways. In all ways, the only difference is that you have a child and White Sox Dave thinks that's disgusting.

Yeah, yeah, I mean, earmuff Kate. It's okay. Pregnant chicks are kinda gross. Oh, okay, well no. Thereuff Kate, it's okay That's your muff Kate you can still hear it you say? What was that? What was that? You're a buff. You guys are the same person though. Yeah. I feel good.

I feel good for Dave now though. He's got something he can hang his hat on. Do you think? Well, sure. What? Do you think that would translate to other competitions of endurance, strength, skill? What would translate?

Dave's performance. Is Dave more of a man than you overall no But we only have one now. We only have one with one data set. Yeah, it's affirmative that Dave is more of a man Well at least he's a better athlete. I think we can say that It's close at this juncture. I'd consider you a troop I It's close at this juncture. I consider you a troop. I would I was giving him shit like he has this whole military background He stood like miles away and shot cannons at people like completely You know To avoid of being like in gunfire

But you know that's neither here nor there. I don't like that This is what you want a big This is this is what you wanted because this is really signed up played on your little computer drone striking yeah Yeah, this is now. I will say probably got to do that like badass security chatter and all that Like that is so you got the yeah like press buttons like yeah, this is like this is evil Michael Scott Yeah, Swift Swift boat campaign yeah Remember that oh? Carry when they came out and said John Kerry fought in Vietnam

my god He's he's all he's all the way back you're all the way back Tons what do we even do now to get back up? I don't know I told you what you can do therapy What? Get on a treadmill. Oh, yeah, the Peloton hundred dollars a month via firm. Yeah, mm-hmm There was a Moment that huff right there, Tiffany, Eddie Beth so a couple notes here, too So beforehand it was it was honestly looking all cons cons

Got in the car. I was like cons You should be doing like military chants the whole time and he started screaming them off in the car Dave like you could kind of see like a Like a befuddled kind of look now Dave's made first excuse to the day He said I wish I was wearing leggings. He's like I feel like my phone's gonna be all over the place It was kind of hit my nuts a little bit Yeah And then the biggest ones Khan brought me as cons brought me aside

he's like he's like I got this ed and he winked and It was it was a moment. Wait, are you sandbagging this whole thing? and he's like he's like no, but I got this and He did not so just some notes. Oh Dave you were at like 50% So you weren't even sure yesterday. I wasn't sure well I was sure in the moment when I made it on that snake draft But what gave me pause was his tweet that I said a couple of days ago on the yak where he's like my buddies fat Shame me into

Losing 20 pounds or whatever he lost so I'm like alright. He's actually been on the treadmill. That's what gave me the pause Yeah, but like in the moment. I when I said that originally on the snake draft. I was Fairly confident, so you're faster than cons. What does he have over you I? Don't know I don't know yeah, can you try to think of something cons you have anything? I have nothing to say right now because anything I say right now. It's just gonna look like I'm a poor sport and That's not how I carry myself Dave beat me fair and square There's nothing to be said. I don't like that. You know even you call me a fat midget Don't like that. You know even you call me a fat midget

You know yeah, well Dave. How did your legs and body feel during the race pretty good? Yeah, I knew about what I was gonna be at yeah, and but I Started getting my own head the second lap because I was like because I wanted to pace about 130 the whole all four laps and when I it was 112 I think the first lap and I was like fuck that's flying that's way too fast and then he was like way behind me so I started thinking too much so I really peeled it back and then once I'm like all right he can't possibly catch up 200 yards right now so yeah so turned it on a little more so cons there's a working theory out there from some that the tweaked hammy was in fact

Just the fact that white Sox Dave's speed shocked you and you tried to keep up with him for a lap and you're like Oh fuck. He's so much faster than I thought no I anticipated like I mean I Said what I said about running on a treadmill, but if he's around that time I knew he was gonna come out fast. I was anticipating that so I wasn't shocked at all no tweaked hammy. Do you beat him I? Mean no you post no you don't come on you know how are you feeling percentage-wise post tweak? I don't like like you were you started the race at 100 was your health. What were you at that? Oh? Yeah, I'd say 75 oh 65 yeah, that's significant portionally

That'd be a closer, right, but you you think that you could have beat him with no tweaked hammy because I don't think you would Had I don't think I don't think you would beat me like I don't think you to be me I mean that's that's crazy to say like I have no idea I could see photo finish Maybe he was so fast. I know I know that I'm telling you like physically I pulled up, but had I been with him where I was that I'm telling you like physically I pulled up But had I been with him where I was where I planned to be I? Could have turned on the speed at the end and so could I have though yep? He had some left in my head I had a one last. I mean me saying any of this sounds ridiculous. No no I I don't think it's crazy I mean I said it's on camera to we could see you pull up

Would you accept a rematch Dave? No what? I will win chief X or ed accepts a rematch for sheep chief. Oh For you were so excited for ed. I was excited for it. So I do lose So if Eddie plays chief one-on-one you will accept a rematch for from maybe maybe I'll think about yeah I I think I am doing the marathon verse Pat Maroon though. Okay, that has nothing to do with what I know about but yeah But there's another race in the books. Yeah All right, I would like to see another I would like to see part two I got media maybe especially if you think that well we cons needs a rehab

Yeah, and then we'll see get him fresh four to six weeks Probably yeah, you know you could do is you could go out and tweak your hammy and then see who can recover more quickly Okay, because that is yeah. Yeah recovery is truly a market. That's impressive when somebody can recover fast athleticism Soldier good soldier ism. Yeah, right also tweak your hammy and see what your mile time would be mm-hmm I don't think you win that race if you tweak your hammy. I think he does I think you fucking I don't I I took all the necessary precautions for that to not happen. Yeah, just stretch guns Yeah, it just didn't but I mean honestly like I mean I don't run full-out mile sprints in 40 degrees I didn't train for that. He is his white socks. No I

That was the most white socks that was a white socks Dave excuse. He was overly ambitious instead of a hundred percent I think it was a coin toss who wins okay? I'm fine with nope I see you guys always get on me for being a rationally confident. I mapped out it I did not think he was gonna be that slow. I mapped out exactly that's the slowest mile I've ever run in my life. You did it you did Okay, I saw Steve told you what he was gonna do and then he did Yeah, you gotta give him credit for that or said I'm gonna run a 630 ran a 630 and you beat his slowest mile Wait cons. Yes, can you run a 630 in the right conditions like right now? Could you do that? No, I will say if that's true then he would be you no

matter what. Period. And you got to take into account I had extra juice. He had a lot left in the tank. No, I think you could have run a six minute mile. I was kind of hoping you would keep pushing it to see how you I I do have a couple regrets. Mm-hmm when I stopped I was just like fucking I'm done because I Race was over obviously I do wish I would have kept going smacked him in the ass Just like to fuck with them on the on the fifth lap The cons perfect hammies you could run 630 right? Yes. Yeah. Oh, that's So yeah, that's what I just asked. Oh, yeah No, you asked you said right now with a tweak. Oh, I see. Yeah

Yes, I could I think he beats you no matter what I I'm sorry to say but 40 is hit you and it's fully healthy cons This is a coin flip race. Nope. Yes. Nope based on what we know Facts, let's say this they're trying to do the trans six 65 degrees out cons wins you think so yeah based on the facts Let them do this do not let them do this where do you live fucking fat, Jersey? Okay, you're fat if cons is wearing compression leggings anyways There's fact I think you could say the same for this Dave

This is bullshit You beat the fuck out of I did yeah, I think closer than the footage but Dave like Is it is it not like clicking for you that like oh here? We go you beat you beat me significantly you don't think anything was at play there. Yeah, I think that you Knew that you weren't keeping up, and you baked in the hamstring excuse that yeah, you're right I I injured my hamstring on purpose Fucked his ham. I'm not saying I'm not saying that he actually tweaked his hamstring or not

I'm saying he would that's what he's saying right now like that is the excuse. I don't know if I'm not making an excuse I'm just not at all. I think he there's absolutely lightest bacon it You what is there not a non-zero chance that he's faking this yeah? No, I agree with you Dave why I think because I was fucking dust. I yeah the first lap I was right there. Yeah, you realize you had no chance of keeping up with her another three laps He'd and you're like all my hammy now. Yes. Well, that's okay. That is the most base level excuse We he knows he right through that no cons if he was lying. He was I will We know I'll also say, you know the fact that you guys staggered the start I just don't know that when they run those right now in the Olympics that they that for distance races

I don't know they do that. I think everyone starts at the same spot. Take you down. No, is that wrong? I don't think they do fight back I don't who I mean well that would matter cuz then you went out front and you set the pace, but he had the inside That's the point. Oh, yeah, I know I know I know So why do we stagger? That's my I asked that you're trying to fuck with you Change boy, I mean if you want to give cons the extra five feet that I had in the end sure We would love to but that changes everything Yeah, means the race was sort of moot from the start. It's moot. Yeah, so you said something you had to know something was at play

Are you saying you? Threw it on purpose? No. What do you mean by that, then? He lost by such a crazy amount that something had to be. Yeah. Seriously. By that much? Something was?

White Sox Davis is a speed demon. Conns is not. No. Conns wouldn't lose by that much if there wasn't a force at play. I think he just mailed it in at the end. Exactly. He realized he was going gonna lose by a lot He said that exactly what he said I was gonna do he did yeah, that's exactly what he said that was it

Yes, but he's not you he's no they are what we just we just established that he is me this is spider-man me Yeah, exactly. It's white socks cons and captain Dave. He said that. They're fully inside each other. He said that. They are. He said that he was going to get enough elite on me where I just mentally fold and just mail it in and ride it out the last few laps. That's what he said was going to happen to me. And that's exactly what happened.

In a perfect world where he doesn't get hurt. Can we get an MRI on this hand? Yeah, I would love one. I would love one. MRIs work hand or whatever I think that would be how you would check that yeah it definitely is how you check it oh no no we can check this I just never knew that no I never knew MRIs could show hamstrings it could show a torn hamstring but a tweak I don't know yes you think yes Yeah, they like a much like a grade one strain. Yeah, they are you willing to get an MRI sure okay? Oh?

Yeah, okay. That's great. It's gonna be the most expensive Verification yeah, right Who's paid for that Ed picked me or a chief picked me and pick cons? Oh, I did not I picked you to make my life easier. I told you that Oh, yeah, that's sure that is kind of a pick for cons. Are you on a do you have a military pension or something like that? Yes, oh great. You're really you should have to give that to Dave. You should have to give that page is a ripping off the taxpayer 15-mile defended our freedom Dave. I'm gonna say something. I'm not joking around right now. You're like this close, bro this close Okay

Knock it off with some of these com Are you willing to give up your pension to Dave no? Okay, I had to ask I have a daughter. Oh Yuck, right Dave No Oh yuck right Dave No That's my boy all right, and I'm just fucking Lee I know you are I'm gonna go ahead Loved it. I don't think I love it. So what we know I think couldn't have been yeah

I think if it was run again, I'd bet on Collins We'll have to run it again now, we'll see all right All right cons Dave. Thank you. That was that was electric. Mm-hmm. I wish I could agree You were electric. I was yes. Oh my event as a whole it was no it's terrible. Yeah Yeah, maybe next time maybe okay. I might just have to retire after that like Costanza Yeah, our new mission is to get cons back now. Yeah Yeah, you let us know when you're healthy and ready to go and then we'll get Dave back out on the track All right, I'll fly you out here. We'll do it the whole thing again

Love that and unfortunately Dave's gonna win again. No, he's so you won't I mean here's the thing like I'm not gonna stop running But he doesn't have the mindset to lose two in a row Consolidate no, okay, right there was a third That's the three we're gonna be like even I are just running against each other in perpetuity Yeah, all right. Thanks boys appreciate you boys. Oh team green. Yes This is big for us for mini golf. Big, big, big. Eddie, you can come in here. Good job, guys.

Good running fellas. I love that. I loved every second of that. Oh, my God. Jesus Christ. It would have been the same exact monologue. I had cons one credit to us for playing great, good, good. That was a lot of competent. That was fun. It was a lot of fun.

It was fun. You guys were incredible. Everyone played their role perfectly. Good court marshal, bad court marshal. I just kept on whispering to Dave, defend yourself, defend yourself. We got Dave to basically question Khan's commitment to the country.

Almost turned violent. Kate, you were comfortable that whole time My face hurts from you were just staring in that corner. Yeah, I disassociated who's that to by the way that tall guy I know definitely somebody yeah Cons just oh, I think I know maybe who it is um Khan's just shooting cannons for all I did was shoot cannons It's like I mean Tommy said that today. Do you know in the Revolutionary War? Stab people to soar that out of the water yes his appearance. He's fast as fuck, too He's back God did he bad so back we had to break a man to get him back

Dave is back. He is back. He has to To back is there a problem. Are you nervous that he might be too back? We can't I mean yes for my personal sanity, but for the work work life like no yeah, right. Mm-hmm. It's great Yeah, he used like when he was gone. He was great to hang out with I loved getting dinner grabbing beers But now I don't know. Yeah, right. Was it like entertaining to watch from your point of view? I mean it was entertaining because Dave's so fast. Yeah. Yeah, he's like like was with Sonic the movie entertaining Cars entertaining crush box office speed true Shit all shit's awesome cuz it was such a route it was

I'm telling you this wink cons gave me I was like oh shit Dave's in trouble. Do you think he fooled me with that too? No, yeah when he initially said it I know I think he was just shocked by Dave's speed Yeah, I we all were speed kills What was it was it like when they first got in the car before I texted you tell him not to talk Dave said he sandbagged us a little bit. He said six minute is his actual mile Ah, so he was like I was actually aiming for that. I don't know Okay, okay, and he's an artist man And cons truthfully did not talk much at all that picture you took was so funny. Yeah, I was just like all right

It's like my kids dropping them off for practice. Yeah What's up? It was it was yeah So much fun Dave man Yeah, did it at any point it actually look like he pulled a hamstring like was he he said he pulled it when he was Rounded by the tennis courts and nobody was over there with him because Dave was so far ahead So and he did say that side was a little damp. Oh I mean, I don't I don't I don't know. I don't think he did he agreed to an MRI

What it called our bluff But he didn't even know that MRIs could show hamstring tears or tweaks. We gotta get him to like bend over or something and show that he's totally fine. And we like task grabbing an MRI. He might celebrate on the course today. A little deep. Yeah.

Check him that way. They're the same individual. Yep. Head to toe. That's why's why they're cons playbook was insane Yeah You guys are in shy anyone who thought cons gonna do it I think you have to feel a little betrayed lied to moment that's more what I feel not stupid betrayed right Have you ever seen them about to freak out like that like he was getting mad Did you hear him you must have missed that part

Well, that's the closest I've seen to him being actually angry, but kidding yeah That was his best gag yeah Well, that's the closest I've seen to him being actually angry but kidding. Yeah, yeah That was his best gag. Yeah Incredible bit. Oh my god Che Che was the white socks. He called it was a vision from the get Che how fast could you run a mile? Not that fast. Yeah Definitely not 630. I have run maybe best career

630ish but You just said definitely not. That was like 10 years I can't get back there. Okay, okay. Do you think Dave would say he's a better swimmer than Che? At this point I don't know how high his confidence is. You said swimmer? Yeah, Steven has been taking swimmer lessons.

I think we need him to stack some nubs. I think a couple more Steven You're a good swimmer no terrible. Oh, he's trying to run. He's trying to swim a hundred laps this year We've been over for a couple weeks now, so oh yeah total. What are you at Steven 11.25? You got a quarter of a lap, and you cut for the side? All right, here we go. You don't know the caveat. Yeah, I shouldn't have brought it up. What's the caveat?

He doesn't breathe when he swims. He wants to hold his breath. He keeps his head down the whole time, and then so he'll swim a half a lap, and then come up for air and be like, there's a half a lap. And he stands up when he comes up for air. What is this? He doesn't just lift his head, he fully stands up.

Yeah, here it is. Want to see it? Look how big this pool is. So much commentary. This is the only time we did it in this pool was for tapings. Don't... Oh, that was a... that looked like a false start you did you did you not just hesitate? Okay Here he goes

I mean, this is ridiculous. It's ridiculous So that's a lap? Half a lap, half a lap. Wait, you have to kick your head under the water on the turn. You take your head up? So you take a break in between this? Wait, you take your head up and you only do like halfway back? That's it. That was it. That was a lap.

No, that's half a lap. I was not used to this pool. And yeah, this is like four feet deep on that side, so taking a turn would be a little risky for a guy my size. I was not used to this pool. And yeah, there was like four feet deep on that side. So taking a turn to be a little risk for a guy. I said the pool. And there was a lap. That's one lap. Nope. He's trying to get a hundred this year. And how many do you do per session? Last time we amped it up, I think we were at like, uh,

two and a half or two and a half. Why do you even get in the pool? I mean, that's such a waste of time. That's the funniest thing. I thought I was going to be in the pool more. Yeah, no that wasn't what you were saying. That's not what he was asking. That's not what he was asking at all.

At all. Oh, I'm there, I'm there, I'm taking my kids this way. No, again, no, that's not what he was asking. What, you ramped it up to two and a half Yeah, I did double time. I knew I'd miss some weeks. He's did as not the point Francis was making he said Why'd you get in the pool? No, that's not it. That's not exercise in the pool. That's not exercise No, it's not. He also thinks it's gonna get his Lung he's gonna he's fascinating his lungs even though he's doing he's averaging like a lap and a half every three weeks

Yeah Steven have you ever tried to hold your breath for as long as you can underwater? Certainly yes, do you have any sense of how long you think you could hold your breath for not that long maybe 30 seconds yeah Yeah, these are pathetic I mean Not that long, maybe 30 seconds. Yeah. Yeah. You're pathetic. I mean, you're not going to survive anything. No. No. Ask him how long he can drive for, Max.

Survive, Eddie. How long can you drive for? Four hours? In a row? Alright, well that's not as bad as I would have thought. If he's driving from Chicago to All right, well that's not If he's driving from Chicago to Cleveland he can't get all the way there wait like without peeing or without I need a break. I can do more that day. I very much prefer not to

Like if he has a five-hour drive you stop in it before yeah, no Switching drivers at four yeah, okay So yeah, he's gonna. He's gonna keep swimming and then whatever he lands on by like December We're gonna do a special yak at a pool where he has to get all the way to a hundred it might take Day, it's gonna be a long. Yeah, it's gonna take forever That's excellent because he he he swims like someone who's gonna drown in any moment you slim you swim like you're you're doing it for rehab You know it's slow, but it's not crazy bad slow yes for a very short length That pool yeah, he was in a horrific car accident. Yeah. And this is like, oh my God, it's actually never gonna swim again.

This former Olympian got hit by a semi truck. It's quite inspiring. That you can swim that well given what happened. Here is we should take that video and make like a the dodo video. It's like with happy music behind. It's like this man.

Yeah, they said he'd never walk yeah that with him and con he just needs a hundred laps by the end of the year yeah we don't quite know yep and why'd you only do one right there then I love introducing this to new people that pool was a different pool we went to a hotel and it was four feet deep and I don't know how to do the turn you don't know how to do the turn deep and I don't know how to do the turn You don't know how to do the turn that again. I don't know how to do the turn underwater Yeah, and so you you need to do the turn underwater for it to count. No, no, no, no Is is I have to once I get to the other end I'm gasping for air

Yeah, so because he doesn't so that pool was was too shallow that pool was both too shallow and way smaller than I'm used to But a pool I usually do wouldn't that help I would help you hold on you're missing something He does not know how to do the turn period like if I were in that pool I would know how to do the turn even if it's that shallow you can turn even if it's shallow Why don't you just touch the wall stand up for a second then turn around and go back? He doesn't know how to do a third rep yet. Yeah He's gasped Probably could have done that or come very close to a full second in my normal pool I'm not I'm not there yet. He did actually on his third and fourth attempt. He he did the turn I

I I don't want to talk about this anymore right but I still don't understand yes you're all caught up show the third or fourth attempt why why can't you just like ready he does the turn here set okay he's off so we got four laps in this day, yeah Oh you don't put your head out At the wall I'm playing an away game here. I don't know dude. No, he keeps going. I believe for some reason he doesn't

Comes up for air has to be underwater the whole time. Yeah, that's part of the resolution. Yeah, I see I see Well, if that's true that man, okay I get that but it makes no sense because no one has ever swam like that ever No, now I get the turn. Yeah, okay, you know when they do the Olympic 50 meter freestyle. They don't come up. Yeah Yeah, but that that's like 25 seconds. Yeah, or even less what they're hammering the water Yeah, they got nuts and a full have you seen a lot of Olympic size pool. Yeah, it's super impressive. It's not huge What's their times? What's the time? I think it's like in the 20s, right? It's like

Might even be less. I don't know Can we show this not Olympics Oh Look at these oh my god, yeah, they don't they're swimming chase style. It's like oh, it's way lessened Holy behind it. Oh, oh, yeah, got to come back my body, but snap in ass Can you guys do that part the underwater like oh? All right, I mean yes not well 19 seconds that's crazy. We had their chase chase pretty much that guy But pretty much the same and what was the treading water thing? Oh, he can't tread water.

That was like six years ago. He treaded water for maybe four and a half minutes. And then he was ready to drown. And what's the average person's ability to tread water? Isn't it pretty high? But he said he could do it for hours.

I know Marines. Did you have to do it? How long did you have to do it for? No, no, we never had to like do it for a long long long ass time Donnie said he could tread water for hours Yeah, look and average conditions most people would be able to tread water for up to a maximum of two to three hours. Yeah, okay I mean does does You have you can't like lie on your back and just float that's not treading water That's treading. I that seems high

But France you could tread water for an hour. I Do it. I truly believe I could tread water for Five. Oh, yeah, right. I don't know if I could do five hours, but an hour I easily could do I don't think I'd have any problem. I would get hungry. right like the issue I get bored. Yeah, it depends on water temp. I think be meek Phil masturbating Yeah, boring I grow tired of this Yes, you're all caught up on Che Wow, it really is fun explaining its new what's with him in the water though He's a really bad swimmer. It's bad. I know. I'm sorry.

He's a really bad swimmer and his New Year's resolution is to swim a hundred laps. Did you grow up swimming? Like you had friends with pools and that kind of thing or like you just didn't swim growing up? No, I took swimming lessons and was like capable. Fire that person. Yeah. Yeah, I mean I could go in the water and do a high dive and swim to the side.

That's fine. He just had a really goofy swim instructor 30 years ago I'm gonna fuck like his swim instructor didn't know how to swim. That's pretty clear. He just hold your breath Job well Kate's kids swim instructor has one arm what yeah And Kate's the only kid in it and my son cannot swim I can Swim in a circle yeah What's your prune time, Steven? Oh, that's a great question.

Great question. You gotta improve that. What do you mean? Like, how fast do you prune? Your hands. Are you pruning quick? Uh, I don't know. I haven't taken a bath in a long time, so.

Well, what about the pool, Steven? Oh my god. Any body of water. I don't... What a surprise. Washing your hands for too long. I don't know. I don't think I prune in the water.

I've never in the water for more than 30 minutes. You can prune in the shower Not me oh Go get it go get a tub of water Water show can tell show and you prune. I need to know how fast he prunes tomorrow will Yeah, all right. Yeah, so tomorrow. We will have some chase start with his hand in a water I do growing up is you don't prune anymore I prune you're not what you're in water long enough to prove oh yeah much I prune I was in the pool the other day I can't remember the last time I pruned prune washing my hands yeah and my prune lasts Yeah Pruning sucks. Why what I think it's kind of cool. I'm still nothing different on prune. Yeah, I haven't pruned in years

I've never I feel vulnerable when I prune. Yeah, like my vulnerable as though my exoskeleton whatever that last Layer is now I'm the defenses are down. It's gone Like in return of the Jedi when they knock out the shields. I could get a cold more easily when I was pruney. I had a cousin who fell asleep in a shower after an Eagles game. He was there like all night and in the morning

he was both pruned and his body like absorbed. He was like so swollen. Oh my God. And the toaster next to him stopped working Showers that's an impressive that yeah for like a long time like that would wake anybody up wait talks Dave doesn't cold instantly Dave sleeps in the shower Take shower naps what? Curls up on the bottom right when he's hung over. Yeah, it's on all four my hotel room right now The one they put me in is the handicapped hotel room

Oh, that's awesome as the tub it well No, it has a seat in the shower, and then the handheld and the bathrooms wide bathrooms in norm Yeah, but is there a lip so the water doesn't get to the back. Oh, no. It's so just folks right onto the floor Yeah, well they stop problem the lips in and hotels. I know yeah, oh And I do have a tub to that point Kate, but I also have this you know shower That's flush to the the floor But I I see the bench that you can fold down It's one of those and I was wondering if it would be inappropriate of me to use it is that like parking in a handy?

No, you can use that even though I'm able-bodied. Yeah, just put it back putting my bare butt cheeks on the bench meant for Yeah, guy in a wheelchair just rolls up into your hotel. Yeah, what the fuck Get your ass off my bench. I don't know I would do it But I'd feel like I'd want to wear a bathing suit and that's nothing against the handicapped No, and that would be quite a move to wear bathing bathing suit. And that's nothing against the handicapped. No, just in general. And that would be quite a move to wear a bathing suit in your hotel shower. In my hotel shower. Yeah. Oh man.

Do you guys ever try to live as though you are blind just to see what that's like? No. Close your eyes and walk around. Scary as to not, can't do it. Even if you're with, say, someone who understands the experiment and is willing to sort of guide you a little bit

It's horrifying. It is horrifying. I think it's empathetic All right. I think there was a curb where he did that. He closed his eyes. He's like, it's not that bad Oh, yeah after like a minute. I want to do this though for It is horrifying. Have you done it for a long time? I've tried not not not super long I mean it is really tough it's it's probably the way that Steven feels in a pool, yeah, I I But it makes you admire blind people. I saw an Anthony Juzmick podcast clip He was saying how do blind people even know where to look for Braille? Oh You know, I guess just right in front of you. Is anyone else have their eyes closed right now blind people even know where to look for Braille. Oh.

You know? I guess just right in front of you. Does anyone else have their eyes closed right now? Yes. No idea. Well, I don't think they're seeing just straight black. No. Oh, really?

A lot of things. Yeah, there's a lot of degrees of blindness. But like, if you were blind, wouldn't you automatically be on the hunt for Braille, any room you go into? I wonder if there's like a mandated height for if braille's on the wall it's about here you know what I mean? Like if there's like a general Definitely

The craziest thing to me is people who are born blind and it's like they don't when you say a color it's like they have no You say anything Anything They have no basis for it For purple I would convince myself I was hot as fuck and if people told me otherwise I'd be like, I don't know.

You wouldn't even know what hot means. Let's not tell the blind chick she's ugly. I think, and I don't know if I believe this, that I would rather be born blind than to be born able-seeing and then lose my vision. Yeah. Yeah, probably. First of all, I think you're better at it. Yeah.

You're going to be better, you're innately blind. You're better equipped. You're a natural. You've had longer experience. That's a you're better. You're a natural. You've had longer experience Born blind you wouldn't even feel out of disadvantage in any way, right? I watched this documentary about a kid who was born blind who skateboards like around his neighborhood and he uses like he He makes these clicking sounds and he's they said he's developed like a bat like he here's the way his he like echo locates I mean sonar boy. and he's a sonar boy

He's like a sonar boy. He's like ripping around his neighborhood on a fucking skateboard I've seen a clip of that guy I think where he grinds the rail and he uses his stick to find out where the rail is Oh, that's what the bumps are for before crosswalks, right? Yeah Yeah, watching a blind person cross a busy crosswalk is like very impressed. Yes impressive. Do you ever go help them? I think I have I like to I like I don't want to be you're like I always feel bad where it's like I'm oh this yeah this guy he's really good at it I feel like it's okay to be like you good yeah I don't want to be presumptuous to be

like oh you need help I said this on the on son of a boy dad but not too long ago I was crossing 6th Avenue and I there was a blind black woman who was just starting out from the other side so I hustled across and Offered an arm and helped her across the street and I just felt like for the rest of that day. I could Kick children. Yeah. Oh, yeah or or steel Because I had bought so much karma. Yeah, right on that I helped an old woman down like an icy slope in college once not a single person saw

Yeah, sure that happy for Jay Leno, I know he really got banged up Was the blind black chick like thankful? Yeah very. Yeah. She was almost it felt like something out of time. She said why thank you. You know I remember her saying that. That didn't feel great. It felt really good. Yeah. Is it the deaf people that they don't view being deaf as a disability So if you get a cochlear, is it cochlear implant? They like you use an enemy. I think some of them Yeah, but all of them that area in DC that has like a ton of deaf people There's like a very big deaf community in DC

There's almost like a hierarchy like the deffer the longer your longer your the timeline of your family like my great-grandparents Grubber rubber rubber have all been deaf They're like the higher your status is and the and like implants down upon I watched there was that reality show they were fucking like crazy Not that sound like Good time good time Yeah, there's like a hierarchy to it. I didn't know this. Yeah, there's like a hierarchy to do it this yeah, that's interesting Yeah, his parents were

Doing sign language on the Mayflower. Yeah. Yeah Came over they were told which bunks were theirs by points There's like at the whole neighborhood they like all this shopkeepers like everybody is deaf and it's it's pretty cool It's like that'd be cool to live. yeah, in a non-hearing world with everyone else. Yeah. Have they decided the matchups for mini-golf yet? I'm very curious. You guys talked about B-Fy soon?

Yeah. Dude. Bad. Broke my heart. Yeah, he was on that course for hours after. Was he? Yeah. I texted him late at night.

What'd you say? I just said I hope you're doing okay. And he was a total good support about it. He didn't seem that loud. I think it's a good, like, it's not a good thing you want to hit that putt, but the general, I think foreplay knows who he is, foreplay audience, but like the general bar store world doesn't fully know who he is. Yeah, it could have been better for his first introduction but any introduction is good

it's kind of perfect from i watched it again he didn't even hit that bad of a putt i'm shocked it didn't go in yeah he didn't like miss it it truly lipped yeah it's better than missing short yeah that would have been horrific And the the team's still up to Yeah, but it would have been It would have been grim seven and a half to four and a half so being up three is a lot different It's all we got to just go seven and five we got to go That's possible very possible, and then I think the tiebreaker is captain's sudden death. Oh my god Oh, I love Kirk on that

Kind of want that insane We need that we need that bad is our cons and Dave both they're both still in this right They are yeah. Oh my god. Yeah, yeah Fuck that fuck that oh wait yeah no no no let Dave no idea you can't take that away from Dave today give him a day no you've got to let him have at least 24 hours just remember you asked for this I did I mean I it's a blind draft so it could happen that they're up against each other and I have no control of it but I want my boy to have one day because he's gonna lose probably his mini golf challenge.

Yeah, something very bad will happen to him. I don't know, because Konz is hurt. That's true! He might have to withdraw. Forfeit. I mean, I wouldn't be shocked. How were you calling Meek Phil's, he got hot yesterday.

I let the moment breathe. Couldn't stop. That was greatness. Meek Phil's uh he got hot yesterday? I like the moon breeze stop that was greatness Meek Phil reading like three inch putts he curled up He wound himself up so tight yeah, and it's not like He he doesn't know how to read a putt now. I don't know how to read a putt the position he put his body in Yeah, yeah, the still of that like he's looking for a sock under his bed. It was more than that. It was like...

Oh, here we go. For the part of his life, maybe. Take your time. I mean, take your time. Yeah. He's standing every angle on the floor. He's not seeing anything. Perfect spiral.

It's like the Fibonacci sequence. Don't touch my pants. How does your body bend like that? Not falling down on me? What is he doing? I'm controlling my arms and my waist. Like the Fibonacci sequence At one point he got down to that to win the point from a Kirk make Phil I thought he made that At one point at one point they was early on in his first match and one of the refs said, hey Phil, we can pull that off the board

if you want some more room. And he goes, ah, I never say no to more room. Yeah. I never say no to more room. Oh, I would just hear, cause I was on the other side of the course for half of his match, I would just hear the meek echoing down from the course for half of his match. I just hear the me Echoing down. He's the ravel's champ. Yeah, who put this dog shit here? Oh, yeah, this is the first round

Yeah, everyone thought those rocks are gonna Worst case scenario, bud. Yay! Dave. Hole one. That is a hole in one. Woo! I hope we get some more hole in ones today. Certain. I don't know. You have to use the obstacles today.

They're trying to put up some barriers. Yeah, it's going to be rocks. They're going to rock it. Henry Rockwood is what they were calling them Good God. Yeah Alright should we spin the wheel cuz we get it a lot to do this afternoon. That's right Eddie you'll be back tomorrow. I just realized I'm going on Northwestern with Gruden and a bottle of Sylvie. So, okay Okay. Alright, so we'll still get Shane that water. I'm so I'm I can't wait to see that. Yeah Francis great to see you Thanks for having me. What do you fly back tomorrow morning?

Yeah, I'm going to Providence this week. Oh nice. So tickets still available. No, that's all sold out. Love that Love that maybe an extra show. I Thought about it, but they didn't have a way to make it work. Okay. Yeah, go see France Well, you're are gonna go see France if you already bought the ticket. Mm-hmm not I'll be in Chicago Zanies June 7th 8th 9th all that so hey you're welcome in that'll be fun Alright a line with like with a case race. What will that align with our next case race? Maybe never done a case for oh Would you like to I've always wanted to. Royal Rumble is next to it.

Also, we had a reminder on, Che and I had a reminder on Google Calendar to start planning the White Party Wine Case Race. Yes. Oh, my god. I don't even know when we said that. That's what I want to do. Yeah.

We had the idea of whenever Michael Rubin does his White Party, that's just, ugh, it's disgusting to watch all the highlights and the pictures. We were gonna do a wine case race dressed in white. Just everywhere and just. The hangovers. Yeah.

But we're a rumble case race. You might have to be, I think we're gonna try to keep a lot of the people secret for the pops. But yeah, you'll be on the list of invites thank you yeah all right let's spin the wheel also Kyle you were lucky because there's been a busy week I did get the reminder to put a razor blade in some of your food yesterday I didn't so or did you so I probably did I fucking ate it easily

I'll just do it I guarantee guarantee you did. That's what happened I did it. What did I give you to eat yesterday? I forgot you gave me some no I scone Pastry it was what you gave me a plate Go with the MRI get the MRI with car the MRI All right spin it no hijinks Oh, all right. Spin it. No hijinks. Oh, we're good.

Did you go on your date with Malyszek? No, he didn't have the time, so... Yeah, he did. He probably totally did. I want us to just fly down there one morning and surprise him. Okay, I like that. And then be back by afternoon. Yep. Just a quick... Why not?

We'll see. Just barge into his house. Well he has a date this weekend, right? He does. Crash it. Is he the one that said he doesn't wanna hang out with women? Yes.

Yes. Man, that blew my mind when he said that. Yeah. He's detested by women. He hates them. You know the take that he had where he said that he poops and gets in the shower Yeah, it got picked up in a cody co video which cody co still doing videos. Oh, he's back

Yeah, I guess he just came back one day and acted like nothing happened Oh, and it was like talked about malice it was like worst podcast clips, and he just did a whole segment About that clip from the bracket making fun of malisek Yeah, malisek also did also did his dream threesome, his Ryan Gosling and Kate McAdams. Rachel McAdams. Rachel McAdams while he watches. Not bad.

Pretty asexual guy. Yes. The most asexual guy. All right, we'll see you tomorrow. Love you. Bye.