The Yak - Say NO To Bush | The Yak 2-17-22

Episode Date: February 18, 2022

This is our kingYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. How are we going to do it? Make my crack. That type of shit, bro. Make my crack. Make my crack. Make my crack. KB, thanks for showing up.

Crispy ass tea. KB's fucking hungover. Crispy-ass tea. Maybe he's fucking hungover. Your shoulders look wild broad, bro. Yeah. Looks like you've got broad shoulders. Uh-huh. Your arms are popping. You got the shirt rolled up, too?

No, you started taking that shit. Looking like James Dean. You started taking that shit. Like you're in The Outsiders with that tea. Yeah, I did. I didn't. Soda pop ass, pony boy ass. Like you're in The Outsiders with that tea. Yeah, I did. I didn't. Soda pop ass, pony boy ass. Are you shooting or are there pills?

Or is it a topical cream or some shit? Crispy white. Fucking steroids. Jesus. Are you on steroids? No. You got to correct for someone not on steroids. I don't believe you.

I don't think you are. But that tea is fitting good. Where'd you get it off? Instagram ad? This is Target. Six pack. Fire. Owen's wearing the shorts today.

Stems out. Stems out. Felt great. Fuck yeah. Zaz took the subway. You did? Yep. Let's go.

City Slicker says. He is. Well, we always take the subway. Oh, no. I walked, so that was cooler. Oh, City Slicker Owen then. Yep. Let's go. City Slicker says. Yeah, he is. Well, we always take this that way. Oh, no, I walked, so that was cooler. Oh, City Slicker Owen, then. Yep. That's what I meant to say.

How many blocks is it? Like, not a lot at all. 10. I need the confidence to start wearing shorts, but Yin's at home. Really fucking with my confidence. Why, with their whole rickets gate? Yeah. Can't help.

Can't help it. You can't change ankle size. I've looked. No, I'm saying that can't help your confidence. Definitely not. Being the face of Rickets. Yeah. Why are people saying that I have Rickets too?

Now you're the face of r slash no puke. Can we go to r slash no puke? That's the most ironic subreddit ever. No, I think that subreddit's been around for a long time, and you can scroll back to its first post and you can see your ass on there. Is it lots of posts on there? Your pubeless ass. How do I not have pubes?

You've never shown them. Medically, that doesn't make sense. Pull one right now. We'll pub, pluck. Pull one. What's the caption? It's only 27 members. Here's our king. Yeah, there's not many. It's 36 people online. It's one in like every 3 million don't have pubes,

so I guess those numbers do add up. It's like a hairless cat. The profile picture is a hairless cat. It is like a hairless cat because you have to look at it for a while, and you're just like, yeah, I guess it's cute. Don't be cool. That picture is insane. When you just look at a porno. I can't believe I posted that. I can't believe that picture is insane When you just look at a porno

I can't believe I posted that I can't believe that's you I can't either man That picture is insane I think that's why I posted it How are those two the same people? Yeah that's the same Those are posts back to back

That's the same man You could post those back to back And like start selling a program A motivational program I used to be a pussy Now I have no pubes Now I have a hairless cat If I don't have pubes

It's because I just shaved them With the Lawn Mower 4.0 But I have There's a difference between Clean shaven And no pubes I have pubes Because you don't even have

You don't even There's no roots Like potential energy though There's no roots What the fuck is there not There's no roots I have a deep pubes. Because you don't even have pubes. You don't even. There's no roots. Like potential energy, though. There's no roots. What the fuck is there not? There's no roots. I have a deep pubescent voice. You can hear it.

You can hear that I have pubes. You can't hear the pubes in his voice. I can hear that the pubes are trying. They're knocking on the door. Oh, shut the fuck up. They want to come out. That was a political stance. That's completely taken out of context.

Fuck. Pull a pube. I mean, I feel like you could have just put this all to bed by now. I'm going to have to fucking show you. I'm going to get in trouble. What trouble is there? There's nothing to show. Fuck this. You guys like your porn stars to have

a little mustache, stubble, or a bald mustache? Thatble? Don't say mustache. That just grosses me out. Mustache around the penis. What kind of pubes do you like in your porn? The guys? Yeah, yeah. I want the guy to be the most inconsequential looking human.

I don't want him to be too much of anything. Like the middle bear? I want him to be like a generic. Not too big, not too small, not too pukey, not too bald? Just a guy. Just a guy. I've been watching it on the Oculus, which is a real gamble. Because sometimes they'll change the perspective, and then all of a sudden you're getting fucked.

And you've got to rip that thing off your head quick. They won't even tell you. By the thumbnail, it's just like, okay, I'm this hung black man, and then I'm in character, and then all of a sudden. This is something you can buy on the office? Oh, it's completely free. So any child can do this game? Yeah.

It's not a game. I just go to Pornhub. Tommy actually introduced it to me. Oh, you can just go to videos and be in the video? There's VR. The porno that I was in the background of, that Caleb and I were in the background of, was a 3D porno, and you can look to the side and see.

See you too. Nick, play that tonight. I will watch that. So VR is a special, you can get that on Pornhub Premium? Yes, or regular, I think, but I don't know. Brandon, I fuck with your... Yeah, regular too. Yeah.

Like, I was saying, in order for it to be fully enveloped, like the one I watched, it gives you prompts on when to sit and stand and kneel. It was like a Catholic church in all ways because I was also getting fucked. Yeah, that is incredible. How do you beat off without seeing your penis? Why do you need a visual aid for it?

I don't know where it is. You do not know where yours is? I know where it is. Does yours change spots? I want to have it. This is like the same argument where you said that. Look at your dick. It's like the hole on a golf ball.

You're looking at your... The focal point is your own penis when you have sex? Do you see your dick when you have sex? Brandon, that's gay. I do. The thing about VR is when you have it on your head and you're in this whole world. I still know where my dick is. I don't know.

I never know where I am. I just feel like that's what- You're not moving around, though. I think it's- VR's so good, you'll lose your dick. I bet he moves around. You don't move around when you fuck on VR? No.

Oh, all right. What do you mean you're fucking on VR? I'm not fucking on VR. You're jerking off, right? Yeah, but I assume the VR is presenting you as fucking, right? It's immersive masturbation. It's immersive masturbation. He puts it on and he sees a different guy jerking off.

Okay. So what type of... What do you fuck with, Ron? What do you mean? You looked at me and said, Brandon, I fuck with, and then you stopped talking. Your color scheme. Oh, thank you very much. It's spring. It's a springy-ass scheme.

It's warm outside. I've been coming in with some Doritos. Been a while. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. Just cranky today. I'm about to wrap this shit up like burritos. Cranky today?

Yes, I'm cranky. Why are you cranky? Cranky and crunchy like a big ball of Fritos. Are there any Moon Sisters in the office? I'm horny. I'm backed up. Ebb and flow? I just want to go home.

You're backed up. What do you mean you're backed up? I need some dick. That's what that means. That sounds like you're constipated. Assertive elitist. You can't get things out. I'm backed up.

I need some penis In my vagina hole That's not backed up Yes it is How you telling me It is How are you gonna tell her She needs penis in her vagina

I'm dick deprived Yes I need it Look I got me nervous and shit KB why you looking at me like that Yeah I noticed that I noticed that Ebony

She's code switching She talks to me like a Ebony have you seen Did you see the picture of Kyle last week Yeah Pull that out The one when you look like a... Ebony, have you seen... Did you see the picture of Kyle last week? Yeah, pull that up. The one when you look like a leprechaun? Yeah. What?

Like a red leprechaun. That could be it. A leprechaun devil. Quite the opposite. Pull it up. Pull it up. Quite the contrary. Pull it up.

Looks like he has a vagina. It does have a vagina. It actually does. A bald vagina. Zoom in. What's that face, Ebony? What the fuck? That's what I'm saying.

What the fuck? Where was this taken? This wasn't there. I had to take it. Look at his tighty-whities. Wait, that's his skin. Okay, so you have a neon green hat. Why did you post this?

With no socks. You have a jeans on. You should have never posted this. I know. No pubes. Wait, so none of your friends None of your friends could have told you that was a bad idea He did it drunk

They don't really care about you that was not a good look Look at his fucking obliques Don't care Nipples are hard as hell Do you harden them up before the picture Yeah definitely I hate that picture so much You hate it why

Celebrate your boy Jealous Jealous of what I hate that picture so much. You hate it? Why? It doesn't make you jealous. Celebrate your boy. Yeah, definitely. How do you feel? Jealous. Jealous of what? Fucking like the Yemeni Aki at your local deli. Look at this one.

Look at this one. The top of your body is the color I'm supposed to be, and the bottom part of your body, like, it just doesn't go. I don't like it. It doesn't go. It doesn't go. It's a tan line. Well, you need to be naked Be butt ass naked

There's not a cube in sight Did you go waxing? Did you go waxing? No I fucking have So many I have enough I have an above average amount I want to see

I think it's all bullshit It is Ebony Not one evidence I'll let you feel Not one follicle You've been saying that You've been saying that Let me put the shivs down

No I have cubes You've been trying to say You're going to let me feel. You've been saying that. You've been saying that. Let me put the chips down. No, I have to. You've been trying to say you're going to let me feel for like a year. A whole year. I think that you're scared for me to just rub on it, blow on it, anything. I just think you're scared. You lift me in the air, so I know you could turn me around 69, but like, come on, KB. Uh-huh. A lot of cap.

A lot of cap. Of course I like KB. El Capo himself. Yeah. Uh-huh. A lot of cap. A lot of cap. Of course I like KB. El Capo himself. Yeah. Uh-huh. No stubble even. We can't even run our hands over the stubble. Yeah.

We can't collectively do it as a show. Like, we're touching that stone at the Apollo. What are you thinking about me when you posted that picture? It's your baby's father. What, does he lift? Oh, he's a drug dealer. So, no. He don't do shit.

Yeah, no. He lifts that thing. Yeah, he does. He raises that thing. I don't know about nothing. I ain't a narc no He don't do shit He lifts that thing Yeah he does He raises that thing I don't know about nothing I ain't a narc I don't know shit But anyway back to you

Why you love talking about This sperm donor I have KB you got new shoes Some new whites Those are crispy I'm so happy That they Oh

We not talking about His shoes today Not gonna do it I'm gonna let you slide today I'm so happy You got some nice shoes Those are nice Yeah Does it come up They're not Air Max's but on his shoes today. Not going to do it. I'm going to let you slide today. I'm so happy you got some nice shoes. Those are nice.

Does it come up? They're not Air Maxes, but... They're not Air Maxes. What are you rocking? Air Maxes. Yeah, bro. I just kind of gave you a little lay up there.

Maybe, like, if you want, like, you've been saying, like, we supposed to, like, hook up. You don't, you need to know the little, you need to know

these little things. Like, this is important. What little things? Like, my sneaker gang. I love those those obviously you're wearing fucking rebox middle school paintball edition paintball edition even brandon walker laser tag i know 95s but they're like you ain't know you're like what is it highlighter green is a little bit weird a little bit highlighter juvenile highlighter glow in the dark but that stupid ass hat you had on wasn't juvenile. Why people like colors?

He had the same fucking... I was doing a challenge. Challenge? You had the same fucking color I had on. Sounds like some white people shit. Right. A challenge. Bro, you are a challenge.

What the fuck I'm talking about? You called me in here for what, KB? I didn't call you. If he said he was going to blow your back out, I've been waiting. You called me in here for what, KB? I didn't call you. If he said he was gonna blow your back out, your back... I've been waiting. Still in full context. I've been waiting.

Completely unblown back. He's like... Yeah, it's actually a thing. Your back has been unblown. For a while. For a long while. I'm trying to get it where it fits.

You skipped Ebony's whole birthday, too. Right. Every birthday. You were supposed to give her some of that birthday sex you're gonna make it like extend it for me make it a little long get the pump do something like you just thing down flip it reverse it pump make that dick bigger for me it's a birthday gift for

me where do we acquire the pump at the sex store to the sex museum ask for Emily ask for Emily yeah ask for Emily sex museum find your business there's a place on 23rd and 6th that's called Video Video that has pumps that has penis pumps you could dip in right now I thought I was doing you a favor

bringing you you haven't been in content in a while no one's asking you on their podcast that's Cap that is Cap we ask her every week

that's Cap yeah besides us we do yeah no a lot of people do a lot of people this wasn't I got, yeah. No, a lot of people do. A lot of people. A lot of people. This wasn't the time for me.

I went through a lot of, like, family. I know, and we talked about it, and you weren't. You're trying to put it on blast now. No, I ain't trying to put it on blast. We were sentimental yesterday. Now you come in here, you flip a switch, and you start talking shit and becoming, like, some sexual deviant. Because I'm, first of all, first of all.

She backed up. Exactly. So when women are backed up, we get mad about everything. It's'm, first of all, first of all. She backed up. Exactly. So when women are back though, we get mad about everything. It's like, why are your shoes not tied? Like, we get mad about everything.

I've never met a woman that was back. You ain't meet a black one like me. That's true. I've met you literally. And I'm nice to you the majority of the time, right?

Yeah. Exactly, because I was getting dick. Now I'm not. KB's slacking on that part. But, keeping all the dick to himself All right, how about you you also enjoy pussy I do are you backed up pussy wise? Need that I need that pounding I need that like I need that sometimes we all do you go to a rubbing plug yeah Massage Asian dude Asian dude dicks you down plug yeah what's that yeah a rubbing plug it's where you're gonna massage like you can do asian

dude dicks you down really wait you said asian yeah that's another kd no don't just be horny again i'm still exactly that's funny for that i might as well stick with brandon walcott don't say anything i'm sorry it's enough racist undertones we get talked about thank god maybe it's not cap i you know it's not cap you just you don't have. Thank God. Maybe it's not cap. You know, it's not cap. You don't have a print. It's not fake. The whole world knows. But I have pubes.

I want to see it. We didn't see it. You posted two fucking pictures up, and I have yet to see your fucking pubic hair. Do you have underarm hair? High line. Maybe you got to pick one. I'll defend you.

Yeah, what about underarm hair? Do you have underarm hair? You want to print your pubes? You don't have both. Show your underarm hair. Show an armpit. Do you want to print your pubes? I don't have armpit Show your armpit. Show an armpit. You want a print or pubes? I don't have armpit hair.

You don't have pubes. I have pubes. All right, so you have a print. That's a tough look. I'm sorry. I didn't come in here to pick on you. It was just too easy. You did.

You came in and picked on him, right? Very much came in here to pick on him. He also dumped his pubic mound out, and it was fucking, it looked like just a hill. It was just a fucking ungrassy no it was the salt flats it was a salt flat yeah i can see my reflection all right kb we'll leave you alone bro we'll leave your we'll leave your dick area alone i'm sorry after this we can you can show me how much pubic hair you have so what else you got going on ebony um nothing much nothing at all my life's pretty boring right now

I'm sorry Your life isn't boring But it's not for this show It is When's the last time you've done anything? The fact that I got You went to that bachelorette party down the street Bachelorette party

It was a minute ago Nah yeah that's when my sister had her bachelorette She didn't invite me and all that extra shit yeah fuck that bitch but you still went yes I invite myself I'm valid everywhere are those your hotel keys

from Los Angeles yeah alright I just took them out of my wallet oh you want me to go back to the hotel with you you see this is

the whole thing going on in here this is the whole thing and you're not denying it okay 208 no these don't work anymore was it really room 208 it No, these don't work anymore.

Was it really room 208? It was. Damn. How do you know that, Nick? It's something I like to know. How do you know that, though? You weren't even on the second floor. Once.

I knew everybody's number. He was 106. He was 108. Yeah. It was right above KB. I didn't know where you were. I don't know. Yeah, exactly. You were 123.

No, I wasn't. Yes, he was. No, it was an even number. No, you were 123. You couldn't have been an even number. You were 123. No, I wasn't. Yes, he was. No, it was an even number. No, you were 123. You couldn't have been an even number. You were across from us. I couldn't have been across from you. You were 123.

It was an even number. You were 123. That's so fucked. This shit is so fucking fucked. Ebony, did you have a mishap at Christmas? Mishap? I'm sorry. I was just reading a text.

Thanks to this show, I get some girl. She's always texting me new pictures of herself. Thanks to this show? Wait a minute. We don't get that. Who is that? I'm just saying. She just texted me that.

Is she a friend of yours? Is she a fan of the show? She's a fan of the show. Why is she sending? Look at TJ's horny ass. TJ, stay on the stick. Hey, TJ. TJ, look for you.

Look us on that stick. It's on 6-4. It's on 6-4, I'll just say. TJ, stay on the stick. What do you mean? Hey, TJ. TJ, look for you. Look. Look us on that stick. Oh, my God. It's on 6-4. Yeah, yeah. Extended connection. Extended. Girl DMs you and says, hey, I listened to the Yak.

Her boyfriend listens to the Yak. Okay, so she kind of knows what she's saying. Is she a lesbian? Can I sit down? No, I don't want to see that. Yeah, you do. I kind of do. Nick doesn't.

This ain't right. Yeah, does she want to be shown? I'm not going to show her. I just want to see that. Yeah, you do. I kind of do. No, Nick doesn't. I'm saying right. Yeah, does she want to be shown? I'm not going to show her. I just want to intimately show it to you. Come on, come on. No, I don't, unless she gives us consent. Why is that cooler to you guys than a random person? Like, we don't know them.

Right. And the whole world's not going to see it. I'm sorry. If there's a naked woman and you have a chance to see her, I'd. A naked woman? You really only see her butt crack. Really? That's all you see?

Yeah. You know, she sends me videos and all. Thanks to the show. Her boyfriend watches. Can you ask permission for me to see her? I got you. Okay. No worries.

What does she like about you? That I like girls. She confide in you. I think she wanted me to have a threesome with her and her boyfriend. Would you? It depends what he look like. Is this something she was so about? You could easily find that out.

Yeah, no. We talk here and there, but like... You guys flirt? Did she just text you just now? Yeah. What'd she say? Sent me a picture of her. Does she know you're on the show right now? I'm guessing.

Give her a call. Oh, you're trying to put me on blast like that. I mean, no, you don't have to. Why are you trying to put her on blast? Tell her to call. Let's just, like, if she's listening, say it into the mic. What's her name? What's her name?, she could, if she's listening, say it into the mic. What's her name? What's her name?

Are you sure she's not a bot? No, I actually, like, spoke to her. We actually, like, FaceTime. First of all, that happens to you. We FaceTime. We talk. We get videos here and there. Live videos. You're on the show once every six months and you're getting pussy

because of the show? None of us have That's your fault I know No it's not It is your fault Obviously you're doing Something wrong

It is your fault You don't get pussy Yeah I think it is my fault Nick I don't know why I feel like you could get Tons of pussy You're just going about it The wrong way

He just swims in pussy And Owen is in a relationship So he don't need to worry About none of that And Brandon You're fucking married So have several seats Have you seen his wife

Yeah she's hot I don't know what the fuck She's going. And Brandon, you're fucking married, so have several seats. Have you seen his wife? Yeah, she's hot. I don't know what the fuck she's doing with his. I'm like, she's fucking hot. Fucking stacked. Yeah, I'm like, oh, she's got to be doing it for the money because shit. She's like, nah, this ain't it. I can know exactly how much Brandon Walker makes by looking. Yeah.

Yeah, when she walked in here, I was like, wow. What the fuck are you doing here? Okay, all right, I got it. I get it. I get it. I get it. He's paying. Sorry, Brandon. That's all right.

He's got a meaty, purportedly meaty dick. That's what they say. It looks like a pork tenderloin. Yeah, I was just about to say that. Who's they? What'd they say? Brandon's always talking about it. You go into the locker room.

They them wife? Yeah, he's got a they. He's swimming in them. That's my pronoun. He's in. I don't know how Brandon's always talking about it. You go into the locker room. About that they-them wife? Yeah, he's got a they. He's swimming in them. That's my pronoun. He's in. I don't know how Brandon is even married. He don't even eat ass. Okay, just relax.

Staple of a marriage. I was like, hey, this is where we draw the line at the asshole. All right, all right. All right, let's move forward. He's got a point. Yeah. Sorry, Brandon. Would you have a milkshake, Brandon?

I'd have Jamba Juice It's good Why? The Penn Station How much are those? I don't know You buy them every day I get them for you every single day

I think he's fattening me up I don't know I'll fatten you up You're sugar in a meal It's a meal replacement You're about to take his foot Ebony who around here Has been bothering you lately?

Anything List off like top five Anybody or anything That's just kind of been, yeah, I just gotta say. What do you see and you're just like,

ugh. Nothing really bothers me. I don't really give a shit. Cap. Cap. I think it's cap. So on each of them. Tell me, tell me, tell me.

So much bothers me. It's a half-priced cap. So on each of them. No, no, no. I can't say it's like a co-worker. I would say. We have new tech in this room. Say it again.

We'll see if there's some sort of bot that picks up any cash. You're just talking shit out your ass. What I'm saying is the people that piss me off are like the Uber people. That's it. Other than that, no one really pisses me off. You hate 60% of the people here. I'm a hater, which is fine. I'm not a fucking hater.

You're a hater. I'm a hater. I mean, there's hateable people here. It's fine. You're in an office full of white hater I mean there's hateable people here It's fine You're in an office full of white people And you just I don't feel safe at all Love them all

And I say that all the time Everything makes you happy You should be happy that I like you She's being diplomatic right now But she's not a hater She keeps it real That's a fact There's a difference there

She keeps it a fucking buck See you're not real So real You know that's why you don't recognize real Yeah that's right Keep it all the way 100 who do you have a problem with kb trying to throw me out there i was trying to help you out with your career help me out with my career it's a shit talking people that i'll tell that's the formula it gets us views it gets you followers oh somebody out or somebody out i don don't know. A lot of that.

I feel like there's a lot of things. I feel like I feel like 2022. I feel like I people that I didn't like. I actually get along with now.

I gave them a pass. I feel like a lot of people pass. Yeah. I want to pass to my Tico. Yeah. Oh,

you say you got now. Yeah. We rehearsed squashed whatever whatever we had, I guess. All right.

I can sound too convincing. Oh, didn't you want me to fake it I'm not gonna fake shit no you're not gonna fake shit never find shit we're cool I'm recognizing you're real

you know like me speaks volumes about myself you're an asshole what are you talking about you're an asshole you are bro you're an asshole you're an asshole bro

it's fucked up KBY who do you have beef with bro why don't you just like get it off your chest I'm trying to just get the way you the way you walk in You're an asshole. You're an asshole, bro. It's fucked up. KB, who do you have beef with, bro? Why don't you just get it off your chest? The way you walk in as junior. I've never. No, I'm the least confrontational person here.

What? I'm never in any drama. What? You're not confrontational. That doesn't mean you hate people. When have I been in drama with anybody? That doesn't mean you don't hate people. That means that you're diplomatic. Okay. I don't hate people. That means that you're diplomatic. Okay.

I don't know. We need to get some liquor in this boy to fucking have him speak his mind. I want to hear, like, I don't want to hear the cat, because, you know, I feel like you really low-key hate half these, I feel like the only person you really like is Nick. He fucks with me heavy, too. I really think you low-key hate

Owen. No. Owen's probably my low-key hate Owen. No. Owen's probably my favorite person in the world. Oh, you still do? Okay. Nice try. In the world. But you didn't say the same for Nick. No, I didn't. Nick isn't.

I tolerate him. What about Brandon Walker? That's falling asleep over there. Love Brandon. He loves me. Okay, now. Wait, okay. He was very drunk last week.

I was his favorite person on the show. Only while he's drunk. What about Roan? That's fine. I'll take it. Roan and I have a confusing relationship. It boils down to love.

Very confusing. I feel like I always have to be on my toes. Roan, you might be going to confession? I tried to go to confession. I tried to get it all off my chest. I was going to try to be absolved of throwing everybody scissors. I tried to throw Tommy Smokes scissors two days ago, and I was like, Tommy.

And it just smacked him in the face. It smacked him broadside in the face. What do you mean you tried to go to confession? I went to confession at the times that was listed on the website of the church. And it was just open gym. You could just kind of like go in and get your prayers up. People were just going in fucking worshiping and shit. You got to talk to a priest face to face.

I know that's right. But doesn't count. So I'm going back at two o'clock. I asked. I have a recording of myself going to the front of the church and asking the lady when there's confessions and shit like that, because, you know what I mean? So I'm about to confess. I'm about to.

We could all use it. Yeah. Yeah. My problem is I'm not sorry. You have to be sorry. you have to be sorry? Do you have to be sorry when you confess? I don't think you do, though. I think it's just confessing.

I don't think it's like asking. Say your penance fast and hard enough. I think it's more just be, I think I can, like my last sin is that I'm not sorry at all. And I think that. The whole point is you're asking for forgiveness. Is that a sin, though? I think it's just you're confessing your sins.

I don't think it's confessing and asking for forgiveness. No, it's the whole process're asking for forgiveness. Is that a sin, though? I think it's just you're confessing your sins. I don't think it's confessing and asking for forgiveness. No, it's the whole process is asking for forgiveness. You're not sorry about anything. That's why somebody's listening to you. I think they're just going to give me forgiveness. I don't think I have to ask. You have to. Repentance is a part of getting.

Repentance is different than penance, though. I think I just have to do penance, not ask for repentance. You know what I mean? No, I think confession is about the process of repentance. Or I just say, forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. But forgive me is like a demand. It's not like fucking, may you please forgive me.

It doesn't really matter. They built in the buzzer beater with the last right and confession option. You're good to go. You think they don't need to forgive you? It's very easy to get into heaven. It's like the Hall of Fame these days, bro. Yeah.

Everybody's getting in. Kobe. Right at the end, you're like, ooh. Fucking Stafford's going to get into heaven? Yeah, for sure. After that lady broke her back? That shit was hilarious. Yeah.

She fell from so far. And he just turned around. And Tom Brady told him to mix in a water. Legend. Fucking hilarious. Dude, I think it's kind of whack that everybody's crushing Patrick Mahomes right now. What, for that video? Yeah, I kind of feel bad for him.

Can we pull up that video? He probably just loves that girl. And it's nice to have a female friend. Yeah, he's in love. He's a trying hater. And they're like, oh, he's unhappy. It's like, yeah, you've told him that his wife is a bitch for five years straight. No shit, he's unhappy.

Yeah, that rubs me the wrong way. Yeah, I didn't fuck with that. I didn't fuck with... I mean, it was a little weird what he did, though. What do you mean? Saying not having a resting bitch face. Yeah, it's probably because he just didn't... He wants to go out to a game and not have the headline be...

But I mean, I guess he made it worse. Also, it could have been like a joke in passing that they clip. The face he made after. I don't think it was a joke. I think. Yeah, but have you ever seen those videos of like the paparazzi they put out of like Justin Bieber and Hailey, whatever? I think this is too long to be a joke.

Watch the face he makes after she says it. It's so funny. Something to have for her. All right, ready? Keep watching. Keep watching. We are. No, no, watch.

Okay, we are. Patrick said no more arresting bitch face. All right. I was dying. Oh, man. That was just pure anger. Is that what he said to her? I feel like that's what she says.

He said something, something, we're sitting at half court. I think his last words is sitting something, something, half court. See if you can get a lip read on it, though, fellas. All right. All right. Is he fine? He's already put out with it, yeah. Yeah, I can't do that.

Half court. Oh, they're very angry at each other. Do you think so? Yeah. That's just part of being in a relationship. No, that's what sucks about it is, like, everybody in relationships is having, like, some type of problem and just being at half court and everybody's zooming already disliking them already trying to drive you apart and then it's just like he's trying to mitigate that

it's in a tough spot and people are just taking layup lines on it people are like this bitch is ugly yeah all the dudes who like quote tweet and they're like bro Pat could pull someone so much badder than her it's a bunch of like straight dudes

like Pat's too handsome. Alright, buddy. I fucking hate when dudes do that. He could definitely do better than her. What the fuck? Didn't Trump do that with Robert Pattinson? Remember that tweet? Donald Trump was tweeting Robert Pattinson.

Robert Pattinson, who's sexy as fuck. He'd do better than that dog, Kristen Stewart. He did say that. Robert Pattinson, who's sexy as fuck. He'd do better than that dog, Kristen Stewart. He did say that. She was abusing him, though. She called her a dog. That dog. He went through that phase before he was a president,

comparing everybody to a dog, but without dog traits. Yeah, he said Ted Cruz had a dog wife. He was definitely calling O'Donnell a dog. I think we need to add Kelly and Vegas to the mean girls after what she was saying about Mahomes' wife. What did she say?

She said something about her being ugly. Women supporting women. I thought that's what we fucking do out here. Women support women. I don't think she's ugly. There is usually

after that. She's not ugly. I would not say she's ugly. She's ugly. She's not someone that you would see in public. What about him? She's fucking ugly She's not ugly She's not someone That you would see In public What about him

She's fucking ugly What about him He looks like a normal ass person Right who That's your mom Also usually athletes Get praised For like staying

With their original girlfriend Not like upgrading Then everyone on this Actually I was gonna say I was gonna say sexy That's what I was gonna say That level of fame.

400 million. Because if you're married to somebody beautiful, they're like, oh, this isn't like a real relationship. And if you're married to an uggo, they're going to think you're gay like Hugh Jackman. Hugh Jackman is gay, though. Yeah, he is. Have you seen his wife? Oh, she's elder? Yeah, I think she's elderly.

She has an elder wife. And I think that Vin Diesel is obviously gay, too, right? You know who's underachieving? Jason Momoa. Speaking of Aaron Rodgers. I mean, he's got a 60-year-old wife. How old is she? They divorced.

Did they? Yes. Oh, never mind. Momoa's on the market. I didn't know that. Good for him. He knew he was underachieving. He went out.

Well, it's hard to follow. You can't follow in the wake of Kravitz. I can't go. You know who's underachieving? Emmanuel Macron. Yeah. I was about to say that. Fucking Macron.

Sloan? No, Macron is with... Oh, that's Chakri. Oh, Manuel. Chakri. You're thinking of the French... Is that the Frenchman? The French prime minister?

The French prime minister whose wife is his old teacher, his third-grade teacher. Really? Really? And he's married to his third grade teacher she left her husband for him when he was like 21 then he grew up to become a big swinging dick in french politics that's just terrible macron he's like 40 and she's in her 60s her

third grade teacher was like 70 i bet she's dead yeah probably yes 100 good call though Yeah, probably. Uh, yes. Yeah. 100%. Good call, though. Realization sucks, though. Did you ever get mistakenly horny by her, though? No, not her, no. Others, yeah. In grade school, you never know, bro. I don't know.

We had some ugly teachers. It wasn't great. I didn't have a male teacher until high school, I think. Yeah, me too. My first was seventh grade. What was your high school experience party-wise? Did you guys have Project X parties? Well, I was never really, me too. My first was seventh grade. What was your high school experience party-wise? Did you guys have Project X parties?

Well, I was never really invited. I got kicked out of seven high schools, so yeah. Were you walloping people? Yeah. You said I was what?

Walloping people? Yeah. Fighting? Molly whopping. You were molly whopping? Yeah. What's that? Like just dragging bitches.

Good song. Earl Sweatshirt. Dragging bitches. That's what I was doing. There's nothing I want to brag about. It's actually embarrassing. No, it is. It's always embarrassing when girls fight.

How many fights did you get? Who counts fights? Well, I can count. How much? Everybody knows how many fights I've had. Who's been in half of one like me? No, I don't count fights. It just...

I've been in one-eighth of one. My boys did the ball come to work. You fought over an eighth of weed? It counts. You get the co-win if all you have to do is touch the victim. If you make physical contact with the victim, you get the co-win. Wait, did you and your friends jump a guy? Were they already on the ground?

They can't be supine. Yeah. Were they vertical? What was your contact? Was he on the ground? That's not a rule. You can be on the ground as long as he's not vertical or completely supine or bottom. What was your content?

I changed supine. Why do you keep saying supine? Supine is when you... I know what it is. I know what it is. What are you saying? It's that if you touch them while they're already in that position... What if they're prone?

Say supine for a fucking time. Prone is ambiguous. Prone is face down, right? You can still get the dub if you fuck somebody up while they're in in that position. Stay supine for a fucking time. Prone is ambiguous. Prone is face down, right? So you can still get the dub if you fuck somebody up while they're in the prone position. Yeah, and if he's canine, it counts for your body count.

Yeah, that's right. So you got, did you hit him, or was it a... Just got my hand in there. Tag him like you're trying to get an assist on a tackle? It didn't make him feel better. Did it make him feel worse?

Or was it just par for the course? That's got to be the worst part of a fight when you're already ass-beaten and everybody just comes and gets one. What are they going to do? Half a win. And you guys got to stop harassing my boy Jordan. You started that. Yeah, you did start that.

You also didn't tell us he was a teacher at a high school. Well, I also, he was like texting me like, man, I walked into school and all the kids were like, yo, Mr. Marrero, you were on the yak. Kind of sick. I didn't expect kids to like listen. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And his dick is so uncircumcised. They know that now. Talking about he's pissed. That's the reason he's upset because they keep yeah. And his dick is so uncircumcised.

He's pissed. That's the reason he's upset. Because they keep asking him about his dick. Yeah, of course that's the reason he's upset. Yo, if you're in his class, you gotta call him by his first name. Just to keep on upsetting him. Or just go flick it right above his ass. He won't feel a thing, dude. He's uncircumcised. I look a little science again.

Chastity belt around his dick. This is exactly what you wanted. I thought he went private. We already followed him. Get out of his page. I do think your hands look better there. You look fat as hell. The hands especially though, right?

You probably could have tapped this if you look like that. What does that mean? Your hands look big as hell. You're scrawny look like that. What does that mean? Your hands was big as hell. You're scrawny as hell now. What does that mean? He could tap that whenever he wants. No, the fuck he can't. I thought that was the whole theme of the show.

You offered to kiss his penis. I was trying to smell it at first. But, you know, KB, he's all talk and no bite. That's the benefit of smelling. I never said I'm going to fuck you. Hey, you did. Yeah, you did. You said with a Nintendo Power Glove.

What do you mean I'm the hunter and he is the predator? What the fuck am I doing? I'm not doing any talk. All talk. He's sitting. You're engaged. Talk for the radio. Keep talking.

Let me see something. Not in here. Ew, KB. What type of ink hat shit is that bro you've gone through a real transformation i'm real proud of you yeah i'm proud of you because you were fat there not really comparatively there's one i think earlier on the no pubes i believe that you look pretty pretty posted post on no pubes. That's incriminating. I'm following all the guidelines of the page.

Uh-oh. Look at this guy. It's like somebody's catching strays. That's actually not true. His house has a ton of pubes. A lot. Got a fucking bush. It's insane.

It's gross. So what do you want? Do you want a middle ground? Get it out. Give him the Caesar. Yeah, I want a trim. Maybe that's why you're backed up. Maybe you're a little too picky about it.

Okay, you know why? Because I don't want to go down as a fucking bush garden. I'm over here chewing on pubes. That's fucking gross. Balls need love, too. I'm generous to everything, so I don't want to have pubes in my mouth. Hairy balls. Don't breathe hard, Nick.

I'm just saying. I'm not breathing hard. You did breathe hard. You had a hard breath. From what? I don't know what length to have my pubes. Trim it. Just trim it.

It can't be too, too long. Why don't you go to a Dominican bar with him? Do you get a fade? I think you got his fade. KB, who are you just on the phone with? I got a voicemail. KB, you need some chapstick, bro. Bit of buck with you, bro.

Just looking a little bit chapped. A little bit. It's all winter. I know, bro. It's spring today. What are you going to do? 60 degrees today. I think the boys should do something, some extracurriculars after this.

Oh, yeah. You should go skip. I think so. Skip class or like go skipping? A lot of moisturizing here for you. Skipping. Sheesh. I love to skip. Sheesh.

Skipping is way more efficient than walking or running. It's so efficient. If it didn't look goofy, then everybody would be doing it. It doesn't wear you out as much as running does. It's faster. It's more efficient. You guys ever skipped for a long period of time, or are you just assuming that it doesn't? I'm assuming.

I skipped a lot. Are you talking skipping rope? Oh, skipping. I'm not talking hooky. Went through the halls. I think karaoke is the easiest way to get from point A to point B. Yeah, definitely. It needs to be normalized.

Like singing? Yeah, singing around. Oh, the in front, behind method. Singing around a lamppost. Kyle, you look like you can karaoke fast. You look like a kid who can crab walk fast. No, I can't. I don't know what they're saying.

I can key Sean. Karaoke is like a crossover with your legs. Right? Yeah. You ever warmed up before? I have. And you've never karaoke-ed? I never called it karaoke.

What did you call it? Karaoke-ing. Are you fine? Karaoke-ing is a move that makes you feel athletic, even if you aren't athletic. That's a great point. Can we all get a karaoke-in in the front hall? I don't know if I still know how to do it. Get a karaoke-in. It's like riding a bike. Who's talking karaoke first? Owen. All right, I don't know if I still know how to do it. Get a karaoke in.

It's like riding a bike. Who's talking karaoke first? All right, I'll go first. I'll go last. We get a karaoke cam? I bet you guys have a name for us. I'm trying to win back some points after the basketball video. Overtones, actually.

Overtones. Not undertones. We don't do racist undertones. It's all on top. All right, here he goes. Here he goes. All right, well, that's not on him at all. It is on the St. Patrick's Day

merch available. Yeah, we have some St. Patrick's Day merch coming out. Get your green. Back up a little bit. Our stool store. There it is. He's going to try and purposefully... God damn, is that green. You guys can look like that. We use it for a green screen for TikTok.

The holiday is over. Can we get a mic that can hold? This is sick that it's an option. Y'all can hear me? Yeah, we can. Perfectly. Just more often. You got a type 5?

He can't hear us. He can't hear us. You got a type 5? A little 5-minute stand-up? I can't take the mic with me, though. Oh, he can't hear us. A 5-minute stand-up? Huh?

Nothing. Tell us your story in 5 minutes. He tried to do the slap against the thigh, and it didn't work. There he goes. Yeah. Oh, he's struggling. And those knees, brother. What are you doing?

Fluid motion. These guys get paid to cover sports. Why are you so choppy? Oh. That was better. That was better. It looks like he's dancing. He did not like that. It looks like he's dancing. Oh, that one was nice. That That was better. It looks like he did not like that. Oh, that one was nice.

It was a little too rigid. Yeah, yeah. Hell no. Listen to a salsa dance in your head. When did they get a mascot? A little physical comedy. Everybody's worried about him. Bad reputation.

Alright, so Nicky's... There we go. Alright, we're coming out. There's people walking by. Back it up, back it up. They're getting in the way. Ask Kevin to do it. That wasn't bad. That wasn't a way. Ask Kevin to do it. He can't. That wasn't bad.

That wasn't a thing. He didn't do anything. Yes, he did. I do think you guys are emphasizing speed over form. That's good. It's more about loosening the hips. It's supposed to be down low. I don't know about that either.

I don't know about that. Let's see you get low. Let me show us how it's done. I don't know about that either. Show us how it's done, Sam. Let's see you get low. Let me see the low form. Get karaoke, bro. Why do you get low? You're supposed to be low. Do it then. Like, not low, but you guys are I don't think it's a low move.

I don't know if I know how to do it anymore. Go out and fucking try it. You can't talk all that shit. You can't talk all that shit. I don't know if I can. You can't talk all that shit. Go fucking karaoke, dude. I gotta do karaoke. I don't know if I have it in me to see myself do this.

Yeah, you're going to have to. But I do. Do I look good? Yeah, you want to show them how? Uh-huh. Ebony, you want to do it? I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. Oh, okay.

Sass go, sass. You're like a bunch of retards to me. Finally, somebody brave enough. You're my idol. see how easy that was boys that's all we gotta do no one gives a shit oh they do give a shit just unlocked it that's all we needed yep yeah season seven's gonna fucking roll oh shit wait, wait, wait. Back up. Back up a little bit. Back up. I'm in, girl.

Ring, ring, girl. Oh, God. You don't do... What's he doing? I see what he meant. You're falling off a boat. He did get a little bit lower, but it was... I understate. Is he doing a hockey...

Are you doing a hockey version of this? It was slow and low. It looked like you were skating. Owen? What? Or KB, It looked like you were skating. Owen? What? Or KB, which one of you is going next? Let me write it back so I can see my form there. Yeah, they'll be able to get that for you.

All right, get up there, Brandon. I'm not doing it. We actually never did this exercise. There you are, Sass. There you go. Way better than you guys. Ran out of room. Your first two were really good.

I was just getting warmed up. You took two steps. Two steps would carry okay. Owen. Okay. All right. Okay. All right.

You're good. He looks excited about it. All fights once invited to do it so bad again. You already just did it. You already did it. Let him get a chance. A lot of food coming in. Let's go, Owen.

Owen, let's go. We've got all day. Run it. Yeah. He's tight. He's jumping too much. He's singing in the rain. He's tight.

He's jumping too much. He's real tight in the hips. Not bad, though. I just saw Kyle do it off camera, and he's so good at it. Yeah, of course. Where did he catch it? I don't know what he did there. Do it again.

We didn't catch the first karaoke. You just saw the top of your head. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, man. Dude, you're fast as fuck. You flew around that corner. Yeah, you are. Yeah.

I think we need to stop being shocked by KB's athletic feats. Yeah, he's a D1 athlete. He'd probably be sick of basketball, too, bro. Yeah, I bet. Is that Mike Racine out there? Yeah. Nice. Very funny.

Wait, he just saw you do karaoke? out there? Yeah. Nice. Very funny. Wait, he just saw you do karaoke? That is mortifying. Holy fuck, bro. You know he knows Rogan. That's how Sass got blackballed from the comedy. Karaoke for shit. I was way better than you two fools.

Are you kidding me? Grinnelli said mine looked great. I was like, how has he ever said to me? You could be mine looked great. Yeah, he's a liar. I don't think he ever said to me. You could be better than me. I don't mind. No, I don't. It wasn't really up for debate. I know.

I'm giving it to you. All right, so what did... I saw your tweet about Glennie. What happened there? Dude, should we have him in? He just had two fucking... Like porn stars or just... Only fans. Only fan girls.

Are only fan girls considered porn stars? just... OnlyFans. OnlyFan girls. Are OnlyFan girls considered porn stars? Sex workers. I don't think so. Yeah, she has some melons. It was... You see? Yeah, she has some melons. Wrong game.

It was distracting. And, uh... Natty Heavies or... Yeah. Yes. Sure they were natties? Oh, they were natties. Lenny was talking.

He said, I just had to stare at her neck the whole time. And I said, why not her eyes? Wait, run it back because he just looked at her tits in that exact clip. Like a little bit sooner in that clip, right at the beginning. And then he looks up because he realizes he just saw the fucking. What show? Oh, yeah. Right down into him.

He's on most of the line, yeah. He's on most of the line. Look at what your show is. It's so much better than it was when it was walk the line You never had fucking the I have no comments And then he walked in He walked in with these It was like probably like four people sitting there

In the office And he walked in with this girl And I thought it was another OnlyFans girl But it was actually her manager And he was just like squared up And they I thought it was another OnlyFans girl, but it was actually her manager. And he was just squared up, and they were just three to five feet behind him, kind of shuffling along in a line. He wasn't open body language, giving them a tour.

Man, Jersey Jerry's real close. He is tight in there. It's for the shot. Did she have pics? Is she good? Oh, yeah. She's fucking 4-0 on fucking NASCAR this year.

Moving around a ton. She's fidgety. Hmm. Nervous. One of those phone apps. He said it wasn't a great conversation, but they were walking

behind him like he was like their Arab husband and they were his concubines, kind of. They weren't permitted to walk with him and he just pointed and he was like,

that's Tommy. Like a Qatari oil tycoon. Yeah, that type of shit, bro. He was going to tip her fucking heavy. Righteous. He was going to tip her righteous. Tip her righteous. We pull up that clip.

That guy's WeTax, too. Oh, yeah, he was a good guy. He was super nice. They were all really nice at that hotel. Yeah, super cool guys. Jamie had to throw you out of your own hotel. Like when they call me boss. They call you boss? Oh, yeah. Oh, I was getting boss

all week. I didn't get called anything. How's it going? Honey and deer. Boss, boss. Oh, man. Ah, fuck. I smoked a lot of weed on that trip. You did, Brandon. I didn't want to be the one to bring it up. Thank you for being the only person who's been honest about their drug use. Yeah, I smoked a lot of weed on that trip. You did, Brandon. I didn't want to be the one to bring it up. Thank you for being the only person who's been honest about their drug use. Yeah, I smoked a lot of weed on that trip.

Every night you come out, you're like, all right, who's got the weed? I did. Well, if you just sat out there for a while, it just showed up. Me and you, 101 one night. Me and Owen Bond, we sat for two hours together on the same. What type of, I tried to smoke with Buddha Ben, and I just, I didn't know. His blunt was like. So wet.

It's also like a loose paper towel. It makes out with the blunt. I was trying so hard to smoke out of it, couldn't. All right, what do you mean you were trying? It was like flat and wet. Sure, it's for a reason. Like, he's an experienced veteran, but I just couldn't make it happen.

It hits better when, I guess, when it can flatten out that much, when it's that loose. You get monster hits only, but... Yeah, I don't know. I can't call it. It's ass-rolled. It was impressive. You rolled the backwood?

Rolled it tight. No backwood. You don't want the backwood too tight. Just papers. Oh, you need those to be tight. I don't smoke. I just roll. Savage.

I know. What is your mom listening? No, it's true. Yeah, fucking right, dude. You could learn a thing or two from me. I know you're a fucking Stoney Baloney, bro. Fucking Tootsie Rolls you're rolling. Stoney Mahoney over there, bro.

You can't go fucking two hours without smoking. You tried to smoke on our cross-country flight in the bathroom. Owen was trying to. We were asking for weed on the plane. Yeah, that was funny. A bunch of people sent me drink tickets. Didn't the live event send you a thing? You're a sober man.

What's drink tickets? I was fucking loading up on DCs, though. On a plane? What does a drink, what does that mean? I don't know. Lisa sent me like a free drink voucher. Nice. Damn. You got no weed? Did you say

not what I asked for? EB, we gotta get you out somewhere. I don't know where. On a plane. I've been saying this forever. On a trip? What? I've been saying this forever. When is it actually gonna happen? You've tried, Dick. Have you tried God?

Come to confession with me. Both feel great. I feel like I'm always confessing. The latter fills you up even more. Yeah, it fills you up from the inside. Which Dick will, too. Dick will. It will.

If you really get stuffed. I want Dick in my mouth like a thermometer. Yes. Under your tongue? Everywhere. Just barely under your tongue? Everywhere. Just barely under your tongue? Everywhere. Well, if I put your dick in my mouth, it's barely going to get under my tongue.

Yeah, I got that mercury dick. You'll be asleep real fast. Poisoned. You do have a mercury dick. I always forget about that. How do you know so much about his dick? I've seen his dick once Close to the sun Huh

Not the It's Icarus What Oh Mercury So you're not gonna Give me the T on his dick What's your area of expertise If you had to pick one

It can be niche It can be obscure When it comes to trivia I hate trivia first of all If you had to pick one area You know what? It's a thinking game. I don't like to think.

That's why I'm always high. Just answer the question then. I'm answering your question. If you had to pick. Who are you yelling at on this? You, because you're failing to answer my question. Who gives a fuck about what the hell you asking me? Okay.

You still didn't answer it. Watch. You see, that's how I know you sexually frustrated. I thought I was a sexually frustrated motherfucker. You ain't hearing your feelings about a question. You're backed up, KB? I wanted you to answer it. KB is backed up.

We got to get KB some dick stat. He hasn't touched his penis in how long? Do you even fuck? That's the question everybody want to know. I just got text. They just asked me that question right now. I'm not here to... Who's they?

You're getting hit up right now, too. One non-binary or a bunch of people? There's three people that just asked me. question. I'm not here to... Who's they? One non-binary or a bunch of people? There's three people that just asked me. Asked if I fuck? Yeah, they asked me, can you ask me if he fucks? I just got hit up too. Why do they want to know? They ask you if he fucks? Yeah.

Are you going to answer the question? Ebony, somebody just DM'd me. What do you think I should say? They went to high school with you. Okay. Yeah, you're probably lying. They're still friends with you. Okay. Yeah, you're probably lying. They're still friends with you. That's cat.

You're a virgin. Oh, my God. You really are backed up. I probably am a virgin. I swallow, so that's fine. My vagina, I'm a virgin down here, but my mouth ain't, so. Vagina. What, Brandon?

I don't know. Brandon can't say anything. He's married. You know what's up, Brandon. I know what's up. You know what's up say anything. He's married. You know what's up, Brandon. I know what's up. You know what's up. I know what's up. Brandon, you gave me the hardest laugh of the week in L.A.

Thank you. What was it? We were smoking by the pool, and we were just laying on our backs. And after like five minutes, I just hear to yourself, you just go, oh, my God. Oh, is it that or? God dang. Oh, yeah. God dang. He was yeah. God damn.

He was behind. We were sitting by the pool, yeah. We were just laying together. God damn. There was one night Brandon was laying there and he was like, I ordered a pizza, but I can't go get it. It's at the front desk. I can't get up. Why do you say God damn?

It ruled, dude. We were just sitting there. Why the fuck? We were just sitting there and I was like, you know, we were by the pool. The weather was great. You know, I don't know know i don't know god damn yeah you're feeling good feeling good yeah that's awesome it was the best you didn't come to the lakers game because you felt so bad and then i was getting all we hear afterwards is that you were fucking well that was the night well you what do you mean all you hear you're the one that gave me the weed yeah

but after the after the fact you had a great night we could have had a great night i never moved from the from where you had a great night. We could have had a great night at the Lakers game. I never moved from where you left me. I know, but we could have had a fun time at the Lakers game. I was getting a migraine. But then you smoked and it went away. I was getting a migraine. I had the best excuse that night. Jeff also didn't go. But I was sitting there with Jeff, and then you gave me a bunch of weed,

and I stayed there for three hours until y'all got back. And granted, you were closer to the Laker game than us. In two of the three hours, we were in an Uber. Yeah. Trying to get to the Lakers game. It was hard to get there. Where is Stephen Chang? I fucking love that team, bro.

It was a good game. LeBron's shortest fucking person. Yeah. Like that's all? Said that before. I thought LA traffic was like a bit. Yeah, I did too. It's not like I was bad.

I mean, I don't know. Who was that? Who was that, dude? That guy gave you not like I was bad. I mean, I don't know. Who is that? Who is that dude? That guy gave you a... What happened? He kind of gave her the nod. He was like, what's up, shorty? Oh, you know what?

He's like, oh, I see that black girl on that white show. Yeah. White show. I don't know who the fuck he is. Mm-hmm. He be white. Moving on up.

I'm good. He be white. I get it. I think I'm going to go away. I think I'm going to date me a white guy. I'm going to stop describing himating where could you ever find one well Barstool has a starter pack so you know

I could choose any well the people that's not married you know you can choose though you can be choosing why do you want to date a white boy because I never experienced a white boy and I heard it's like a myth you know all my friends like you know white guys got pink dicks And stuff so that's probably why I'm traumatized

But you know You know KB I want you to be the first white guy You know Start off with a baby dick Work my way up Yup Are you down for that

I gotta be blacked out Blacked out to fuck me? Not because of that You better clear it up, fix it I don't like how you just answered that You gotta be blacked out drunk to fuck me No, it's not that That's what I would prefer

I'm uncomfortable around you Why is that? Because I know what's up That's why I know what you got between them legs You just constantly disgrace me in my name. You do. You do it off camera in my face. You make me feel like shit.

Do I really? No. Listen back to what everything, transcribe everything you've said to me. Talk to me about it a lot. And read it every day. That's what I'm saying. I think I'm not mean to you.

I think you're being mean to win his think I'm I think you're being mean To win his heart Like Helga Pataki Yeah why not You are Middle school flirting Like who Helga Pataki

Right He's got a DM from I know I'm Helga My bad You don't know who Who's Helga Pataki He's old as fuck He don't know

He's OAT He's on the caps And he said Bro sass You definitely had The best karaoke And that's coming From someone athletic.

Yeah, I'm sure. Yeah, athletic guy. You are 33. His username is Goat. Oh, shit. Is it the sneaker up? No. Dude, I'm getting a bunch of people saying that you're athletic as fuck, too.

Yep. Sass, your form was pretty good. They're saying that you could go to the league Which one? They're saying you could maybe go to I had a D1 offer But I turned it down Go to college basketball You can go to

Turn it down to work at the stool Best decision you've ever made Yep Fuck yeah Keep chopping TJ You got a fucking stool in your blood man Yeah You guys watching NASCAR this weekend?

Oh yeah It's the 64th running of the most iconic race Yep Daytona 500 You guys watching NASCAR this weekend? Oh, yeah. It's the 64th running of the most iconic race. Yep, Daytona 500. Tune in to the greatest race in all of motorsports this Sunday, February 20th at 2 p.m., 2.30 p.m. on Fox. Frank Fleming's going down there on his own? He's on Lyft. Yeah, him and Doug's.

Is he driving or is Doug's driving? Not alone. Neither. Tesla. I mean, on their own, though. Like, of their own volition. Oh, yeah. Just for fun? Yeah, I think just for fun.

Just for shits and gigs. We're sending a pack of people down there. I'm saying there's a whole other pack of people that are going. They're their own caravan. And then it's also Glenny and... Spider. Marty. Sparity.

Sparity. Sparity, yeah. Sparity. It's hired Sparity. Yeah, the. Large. Spider and Large. Sparty, yeah. Sparty. It's hired Sparty. Yeah, the Michigan State mascot's going to be down there. Everybody's going to be down there. What's the first pitch of NASCAR? Put it in drive?

Oh, you go ride in the pace car. Or gentleman start your engines. Or gentleman start your engines. Okay. It could be that type of shit. And you have a country singer say something great about America. Yeah, this guy. Can you guys think of other shit that I need to confess for other than everything that we said in there? Because I'm about to go now. type of shit. And you have a country singer say something great about America. Yeah, this guy.

Can you guys think of other shit that I need to confess for other than everything that we said in there? Because I'm about to go now. Oh, yeah. I'll let you back in at 2 o'clock. I think quality over quantity. You killed a hooker in LA.

The worst things. Try to get his facial reaction when you tell him about the cactus. He's going screen. He's not going face to face. You think that I'm going to be able to film him like that? How am'm going to be able to film him like that? How am I going to be able to film him with my phone?

You're going to record the conversation. A couple tripods. I feel like voice recording. I have to be surreptitious about this. Is there any, like, hippo things? You got the drone down there? There was no reason to use that word. It was just flexing.

Surreptitious? I do have to be surreptitious, though. Yeah. Can you go to church, Joe? I don have to be surreptitious, though. Yeah, can you go to church jail? I don't think so. I think that... It's just hell. That's hell.

And this could send me to hell, but it is actually an earnest confession. Fuck. Am I the only guy wearing the 10X bracelet? Mine's on my keys. Mine's on my counter. I cut mine underneath my coffee table Halfway through confession he's just like

Yo is that Roan? Roan from Barstool When are you going to do the oh? Oh no If he knows a dentist I mean you will have to confess that you didn't get your teeth cleaned That's a mortal sin Yeah that shit's bad

That shit's very bad. Talk about how you tried to force your 20-year-old co-worker into smoking 80 cigarettes in five days. Also add that. That's pretty fucked up. I didn't try to do that. Plus, a 20-year-old has nothing to do with it. There's more you've done.

Yeah. I guess I haven't really done shit, bro. What do you feel the most guilty for? I guess you're just a good-ass dude. What do you feel the most guilty of? I guess you're just a good-ass dude. I don't feel guilty for any of it, bro. I think that it's just... You gave a bunch of SoundCloud rappers hope in 2014. That's the most fucked up shit.

That shit wasn't right. You want to mess up your bum-ass sneakers. Bum-ass? Yeah. Shit. White bum-ass Reebok. I got to go do Unnecessary Roughness. They're not fly

They're wack I don't like them You could freaking eat off those bro Where'd you get them? Stock X? You would not get those shit from Stock X ASOS They sold those at Keith

Kith Kith I thought you were joking I want to go All of us to go to a concert this summer even you Ebony we're headed to Florida Georgia line there's no concert we could all enjoy

what you mean I listen to a little bit of everything it's not all about you there's other people here but it ain't all about y'all motherfucker I want to listen to some hip hop that's what I'm saying it probably is about us though we're probably going to go

are you saying there's no overlap KB you and Ebony I'm probably some shit I can relate to. That's what I'm saying. It probably is about us, though. We're probably going to go. Are you saying there's no overlap, KB, you and Ebony? Eponine, I mean? I think we have some, but not a combination of all of us. I think you would be surprised. Right. Coldplay, maybe? I think a rapper would do it.

No. No. I mean, no. I wouldn't go to a rap concert. Ween Sass, Nick, me. No. Third Eye Blind. It's the only overarching. Third Eye Blind?

I would do Third Eye Blind. I would love Third Eye Blind. Third Eye Blind would be the only overarching. I feel like there's got to be one odd man out. 21 Pilots? I think he's going to say 21 Savage, because I don't know who the fuck them people are. I've been to a 21 Savage concert.

What? That is surprising. I do admit it. I'm not surprised. It Savage because I don't know who the fuck them people are. I've been to a 21 Savage concert. What? That is surprising. I do admit it. I'm not surprised. It's in Atlanta. See? The big booty stripper's at. It was after a Hawks game.

It was across the street, and people were going over there. I was like, okay, we'll go over there. I went to Drake Future sophomore year of high school, and I had to buy a T-shirt because I didn't have any that I was comfortable wearing. Damn, KB, how do you feel? high school and I had to buy a t-shirt because I didn't have any that I was comfortable wearing. The text, stop playing footsie with Ebony. Random number. Oh, fuck. Are you playing footsie with Ebony?

See you, Brandon. See you tomorrow? So I was thinking of our draft next Friday. Nope, they're all illegitimized because we didn't complete the challenges from the last draft. Nobody can trust us. That was a ball. This is a food draft.

I think that we need to... I got a death threat in the DMs yesterday. Yeah, you did. Yeah, you did. I got a death threat. Guy said, I want to kill you. He said everybody wants to kill me. Yeah, everybody wants to kill me. Which isn't necessarily a threat. It took him a while to come back with the I'm sorry.

He said I'm sorry? It happened this morning. He said, oh, well, I don't want to put him on blast too much. Yeah, no, Matthew Maloney. That's him. What a loser. Yeah, so he came back with an apology this morning, but it was half-baked. What was it?

How do you apologize after some shit? I hate a fake apology. I need my apology to be fucking perfect. And sincere. Yes, I need my shit to be sincere. What did he say? I don't know. I kind of don't want to put out.

Yes, put it out. What do you think? How would you do it? Right. Tell him I'll beat his girlfriend up. Yes. Since they want to kill you, I'll beat her up. Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.

Ebony, you're a great resource to have. Oh, my God, I'm so sorry. Ebony, you're a great resource to have. Oh my God, I'm so sorry. How's that half-baked? Right. The Evan guy who was harassing me all week that I was talking about, he DM'd me afterwards. He was like, for real, man, my bad on being an asshole. I was drunk messaging you for most of it, and yeah, my bad. Wow.

See? There's good in everybody. I said, all good, man. It's been funny. I'd still beat your ass, everybody. I said all good, man. It's been funny. I'd still beat your ass, though. He said, bitch, please. I said extremely feminine phrase to say. I now believe that you live in West Hollywood

and at our shows. He said, you want me to be gay so bad, don't you? I would have turned up too much if I would have been... You think that just reconciles everything he said to me? No, but it's an apology. He did seem like he was genuine.

I enjoy popping off with people, too, because they really expect that you're not going to, and then it's like, I'll give you all the fucking time you want. I did one, and I deleted the messages. I couldn't look at them. Yeah, I've never done that. Ah, we're common men. I'm the same as you.

We're both dudes. And I'll argue with you. So I'm going to talk to you. Yeah, let's argue. I'm going to start doing it then. I tried to once, and I got wrecked. men yeah i'm the same as you we're both dudes well and i'll argue with you so i'm gonna talk to you yeah let's argue i'm gonna start doing it then i tried to once and i got wrecked i i could good i know the trolls now i'm not gonna entertain them they're so good i don't get that also uh i think that we're like in the process of like doing something even though it's season seven now like i think 10x is like a mantra that goes beyond just season 6. I think we're in the middle of 10Xing

and with that, we're getting a lot more... We're just broadening the net. Our net's a lot wider. We're catching dolphins and fucking tires and shit that we weren't supposed to... That's not necessarily our school of fish. It isn't. At the same time, though,

I think that's a good thing because it's a good sign. At one point our episodes were getting like what 25,000 views or an episode on YouTube or something like that. Oh yeah.

And now it's now we have episodes that have over 100,000 views. Like I think 10x is really within grasp and I think that we're going to catch some

fucking you know some swordfish. Comes with the territory. Comes with the territory. Not telling you guys to stop. Maybe you should tell yourself that. But you have time for them. You have the energy for them.

For what I, yeah. They're not going to just get away with it. One of Blattman's eight commandments of Barstool was be there for your audience. Where do you think those – Where did those come out? Because I never saw those. I didn't get them either.

They were sent to all the producers who work here. Is he making a play? Maybe he's making a play. He might be. It could be a play. He's writing a play about us. Oh, no, not a play. Like the girl from Euphoria.

He's not writing a play, but she is. There are eight pillars of Barstool. I think he's making a play. I think he called them. Like a power grab. You think it's a power grab? He sees that there's... I'm actually thinking about starting Euphoria. I don't know where to specifically start

though. Like what episode. Episodically. I don't know how to begin the series. The very best place to start. I mean, I guess you could just grab a... Yeah. Just for some feelers out there for the draft next Friday, if we're allowed to do it.

A George Foreman, and we're going to do H-A-M burgers. So H-A-M, then we have to crush it into a patty, and George Foreman it. And what is the... I like that idea. Anything? It could be anything or should it burger? You're going to try to make it burger, and we should have some sort of adhesive if it doesn't. So maybe ground beef.

I think ground beef should be the requirement, and then we add things to the beef. Okay, so we add to the beach. So is there cheese? No, so I guess we'll have ground beef, and then we add H-A-N-M to the beef, and then make that into the burger. Nice. What the fuck is Brandon saying now?

What the fuck are you saying? Those guys out there waiting for you. What the fuck they want? I don't know. Fucking shit. Ebony, close out the show. I am. I'm leaving. Thank you, Ebony. Damn it.

All right, Ebony's out of here. That's the show. H-A-M? J-A-M Burgers. J-A-M Burgers. I love it, Nick. What should we do tomorrow? Should we do anything tomorrow?

I want to do something fun tomorrow. We should get fun. We should get fun. What kind of shit? I say we get fucked up. Yeah. I physically cannot, but yes. What do you mean you physically cannot?

You can't drink? Yeah, I can. Let's do it. Well, you didn't say you could do other stuff. Yeah, let's do it. Let's just have fun. Let's do a fun day tomorrow. Let's focus on ourselves. Maybe do a Sporkle.

I feel like there's no audience. I was trying to set up a Sporkle for Ebony. She couldn't even name one thing that she knew about. Or a Jackbox or some shit like that. One of those ones where you write a funny title or some shit. Like talk about cum or whatever. We'll just goof off. I think we just do a goof off episode.

I'm down to goof off. My idea. Should we not let Brandon in? Nah. Brandon's our number one goof. He is, but I mean, he's bailing on the planning. He is a free agent as well yeah he is

so we'll have to sign him up quick alright let's get the fuck out of here let's go yeah free agent goof goof on time It's your God, yeah, style, it's me, it's me, yeah. It's me, yeah.

It's me, yeah. That's time to talk, shop, and do a Yankee pop. It's me, yeah. It's me, yeah. We'll see you next time.