The Yak - Sunglass Sas Returns for a Whacky Thursday | The Yak 7-20-23

Episode Date: July 20, 2023

When you're hosting, you have to do crowd workYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, TJ, hold that up. It's the Yak. It's the Yak. Get a diamond stock shot for doing it. Cause love is the Yak. He will bring us silver and gold. It's the Yak. Want some boy story shit.

Should we get other folks? Yeah, let's get a couple more. Kyle, come on, bro. Your taste is impeccable. Your fucking acumen is beyond reproach. And your ability to hoard is second to none, dude. Why not just fucking go round some people? Oh, yeah. I thought that was gonna be

an insult. A lead into an insult. Bro, bring these people in. Get some heads. Get some heads. I know the exact crew he's going with. I know the exact crew. What is there, three people there? Yeah.

He's got the bounce. More bounce for the ounce with that fat ass of his. His ass is so fat. Bounce with the ounce. More bounce for the ounce. That sounded like a radio show intro ounce. More bounce for the ounce. That sounded like a radio show intro type. More bounce for the ounce. Coming up next, we got Kyle Bauer.

40 minutes of nonstop bouncing ass. Commercial free ass. Bouncing up and down over the radio waves. I want to put some icing on it. Nick is here. Lil Sass is here I saw Lil Sass last night How'd he do? I didn't see him do stand up

I just saw him in the wild Straight up posting You saw him in the wild? I didn't even know he was going to be there But first let's talk about Roback I'm going to talk about that in a second But first I want to talk about Roback It's the summer of Roback roback it's the summer of roback

once again it's the summer of love it's the summer and roback what better way to represent love than with roback they got the q-zips joggers hoodies just a nice golf shirt hats lids pants big cats wearing them right now probably big cats Big Cat's not here right now. He's moving and Kate's on the road and they both independently texted the Yak group chat and said, we're wearing Roebuck. It's in a Q zip right now.

Q and the Q's for cute because it looks great. It's a great looking zip and you're going to love it if you buy it. 20% off. R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot to love it if you buy it. 20% off. R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com. You just use code YAK. 20% off.

Pretty good. Pretty freaking good deal for some pretty great clothing. Roback. But yeah, I saw blind sass. You do look blind. No, these are super tinted. You look cool. A dark tint or like a colored tint? Dark tint. I'm going with a cool look today. You look cool. A dark tint or like a colored tint?

Dark tint. I'm going with a cool look today. You look really, yeah, you look cool. Great choice. Our fox in the building. Oh, wow. Wait, are we shades-ing today? I can.

Yeah. Five shades of gay. Try and keep it low, bro. That's boys. Do I go get my shades? Go get your shades. Robbie Fox. Fox. What's up, brother? This is a fucking good-ass treat, bro. That's boy. Do I go get my shades? Go get your shades. Robbie Fox. Fox.

What's up, brother? This is a fucking good-ass treat, bro. This is a rare, rare appearance. This is Yakagami right here. What's good, brother? What have you been up to? Not much. Been chilling.

Before you start, give us some pessimism. Yeah, please. Give us some pessimism? Yeah, what are you pessimistic about right now? Twitter. Twitter sucks. Twitter does. Going downhill. Yeah, it's terrible. Yeah. I don't even remember the last time right now? Twitter. Twitter sucks. Twitter does. Going downhill.

Yeah, it's terrible. Yeah. I don't even remember the last time I was on Twitter. Hate it. Thread sucks, too. I don't like that either. Yeah, yeah. You kind of had to assume that it was going to suck.

What's the last movie you stopped halfway through? The David Bowie documentary that came out this year. It's called Moon Age Daydream. The whole thing is like an acid trip. I just, if I was on drugs, it would have been great. I wasn't on drugs. You'd rather have two moms or two dads.

So I think younger, you'd want two moms, but as older, I'd love two pap paps, two old men. I think two moms. I think I'm a mama's boy. Yeah, that's why while I'm growing up, I want two moms for birthdays, for cooking. I get older, I want two dads. But then like the more manly mom, feel like, is way more of an asshole than a dad is.

I want both my moms to transition after I hit 40. You think that that'll have the same oomph? Yeah. Yeah. One of those thigh meat penises. Two gay dads is kind of sweet. What are you on? Dude, if they had to use my thighs to make my dick, it would be the thinnest cock.

Just a pinprick. Piss would be coming out like a water pick. Piss would be cleaning teeth. Dislodging pork chop from the molar. Yeah, but it would probably be nice, though. Yeah, for sure. They do the most with those. But I went to Sass's show yesterday,

or I went to the show at the stand that Sass was also there on, and I got crowd-worked pretty fucking good, dude. Yeah. I got fucking worst-nightmared. They cracked me open. The host of the show was like, Whoa, look at this guy. His balls are hanging out.

What about my balls? You're in the compression stand. I'm in the fucking long guns. The silvers. Yowza, take a look at this guy. His balls are hanging out. Then the next comic came up on stage. He was definitely

listening to the opener because his first thing was like, Hey, look at you. Your balls aren't even hanging out. Look at his balls hanging out. And he just went right back to my balls hanging out. He's like, look at this guy, half autistic. Yeah, they love saying that now. He just wanted to say something.

And it's like he has a grab bag of four words that he could have picked. He's like, you're scrolled the Rolodex and landed on autistic, I guess. That's what the people did when I went. They just called people autistic. It was funny. They called me Seth Rogen. That's good. I think some people in the crowd believed it.

They're like, what? There was a murmur. Yeah! They applaud you you have a sense of like i can get up on stage and just dress someone down when someone's crowd working you like that or no no i was like yeah i i was like i gave him like a thumbs up my balls are hanging out who keeps on giving thumbs up or something he just was like looking for anything that would devastate me that is never raise a

thumb again yeah he kept on it's pretty good having a good time he asked you what you do for a living and then he came back to me later in the show was like are you what do you do for a living i was like ah oh yeah what do you say i said i'm in sports media he's like what do you fucking represent the big athletes i was like i don't know yeah or not really like i do like stories and stuff like that i didn't know what to say because francis was about I was like, I don't know. Yeah, or not really. Like, I do, like, stories and stuff like that. I didn't know what to say because Francis was about to come up, but I don't want to be like, I work with that guy. And he was like, what's the big story in sports media right now? What did you say?

I just drew a blank. I was like, uh. Damn, I didn't even know any of this. He was like, oh, so you suck at your job. And the crowd went quietly. Fuck you. All right, that's a good set. Dying job. And the crowd went wild. Fuck you. All right, that's a good set. Dying laughing.

It's going to be on his Instagram. They were dying laughing. He's like, Jets got Aaron Rodgers. I was like, well, actually, I'm an Eagles fan. He's like, I didn't know you were gay. Oh! He is a good crowd work comic, too. He's been doing that for 30 years.

Oh, that stuff was good? I mean, he kills. I'm sure he was murdering. Yeah, because he goes like, he goes, autism, gay, balls. Yeah. It's like fucking rotating. He's fast, too. It's like very, like,

Wait, is this, do I know who it is? Probably. It was Aaron Burr. Yeah, he goes fast. He's a fast, yeah. Like an auctioneer. Greer, actually, Greer,

I remember when we used to go to the stand a lot and Greer would say that he would talk to him every single time that Greer went. And Greer used to go to the stand on a weekly basis. He would work a material for Greer every single time.

If Greer was in the crowd, a crowd work comic would salivate. Greer looks like a voodoo doll. He looks like he was born out of a tree. He's no joke. Greer was born in Pan's Labyrinth. He just emerged. His mom is Grandmother Willow. He just fucking fell out of the tree.

But yeah, this guy was on my ass. But there was no part of me that was like, I got to go back at him. I was just like, yeah. Yeah, you can't. You should have said you're a battle rapper. Oh my God. That would have been a nightmare. Anything that would have been An honest response

Would have been a nightmare For me I'm a battle rapper Roastable He's five minutes on me I work at Barstool Sports He's doing ten minutes on me I would expect you

To completely lie To be honest Knowing you I would expect you To be like I'm an accountant Yeah I would have done that I would have said I was an accountant for sure

Yeah He just snores at you That would kill. When we start saying numbers. That's a boring job. Getting out of jury duty. Yeah. Fucking do count for a living?

I didn't even consider it. We were like a little bit late to the show, and then we came in, and they just slid us right in the front row. You were up close. Yeah, in the spotlight. And the way that they have it set up there is like the front row is all spotlighted. Yeah. I saw some people in the crowd

doing unspeakable things during the... He was crowd working another couple and a dude just interrupted and was like, the same thing used to happen to me and my brother, to a comedian who was like, English as a second language.

He just spoke a paragraph to me. It was so weird and inappropriate. It was just... Last time I was at the stand, there was a guy who made the mortal mistake of eating pizza. There was a crowd work comic.

He honed in and he destroyed this guy for eating pizza. Yeah. This guy, they were getting these guys for being a little bit of an asshole

shoving his face. You're not going to eat your fucking crust? And that's the main thing that they serve there. If you do crowd work at the stand, you know you're going to hit your fucking crust And that's the main thing that they serve there Like if you do crowd work at the stand Like you know you're going to hit people with pizza jokes Like you can prepare some shit

Oh just pepperoni? Alright Mr. Brave I'll take extra sausage You guys are good at this I can't even think of it You just gotta say what they're doing How are you doing this? It is hard.

There's a newfound respect I have. We should crowd work the office. Yeah? People that walk by? Yeah. Sass, do you ever crowd work? Are you a crowd work guy at all or no? I'm starting to, I feel like.

No. Yes, you are. No, I'm not. The last show I was at, you did a 15-minute opening set of all crowd work. Where? At your Tuesday night show with Colm. That's because I was hosting. you did a 15-minute opening set of all crowd work. Where? At your Tuesday night show with Colm. That's because I was hosting. Yeah, that's what I meant.

That's host work. When you're hosting, you have to do crowd work because you've got to get the crowd engaged. When you're hosting, you have to. Yeah! Fucking dorkus, my lord. Well, actually. Did you say I was doing crowd work? No, I was hosting.

Fucking Poindexter over here. Wrong crowd work. Oh, shit. Unbelievable. No, but when I have a normal set, I don't do any crowd work. Unless I have to. Sometimes you have to if you're sucking. I don't want to.

Get his ass. Bombing, you got it. You have to do crowd work when you're bombing? If you're not getting any laughs, yeah. It's an easy way to get his ass. Get bombing. You got it. You have to do crowd work when you're bombing? If you're not getting any laughs, yeah. It's an easy way to get laughs. Takes you out of the moment a little bit. Gets the crowd back. Yeah, a lot of people were working on new material last night.

Always cool to see comics, especially established ones, working on new material. Yeah. Writing some shit out with a piece of paper. I respect that. That's brave. I'd figure out the jokes that work and never, ever, ever change. It's a good amount

of people do do that. Hell yeah. There's a good amount of New York comedians who have been doing the same 15 minutes for like 20 years. You probably know it so well.

Yeah, and they're like, they do well every time. Yeah, that'd be fun though. There's comfort zone, but you gotta step out. When you do have new material, how do you go, what's the best way? You just fire it off? Just rip it one day or what i just did a new joke last night he

just went up and it was the first he just opened with that joke i never do i do like two new jokes and then i like sprinkle it in in the middle and then usually it bombs hard and then i go back to the old stuff but like all up with like your best joke after that or yeah yeah yeah i'm back so you sandwich it in between two good ones. Smart. Have you ever bombed on stage, Robbie, with like an instrument? Break a bass string?

You could say that the House of Blues show was a bomb. He tried to fight... He tried to fight... He tried to like... After we went back after the show,

he tried to like run back on stage and like beat the shit out of a dude who was on the balcony that was like throwing empty beer cans at us. Oh, someone was

throwing shit? The whole stadium was was on the balcony that was throwing empty beer cans at us. Oh, someone was throwing shit? The whole stadium was, because I was antagonizing them. It was right after the Eagles had beat the Patriots in the Super Bowl. We were in Boston, and I was like, how do you like that shit? Boo! And they just started fucking throwing them, and then he was like, oh, you're throwing like Tom Brady or something.

Pussies can't hit me. Yeah, you were crowd working. I was crowd working the fuck out of them, and they were literally like throwing bottles at my head. And then they started coming like half full, full. Yeah. Point blank. They were like in a crow's nest, like shooting down on us.

I would say we bombed that show. Yeah, I lost my voice. Yeah, you were spraying your voice With like Your throat with shit Half of your show Your second show ever Yeah So that Yeah

You bombed your second show ever Yeah Whoa And it was in a venue That was like too big for us In the first We sold like over a thousand tickets But

House of Blues Boston House of Blues is pretty huge right I was like 28 bad And I was like Talking shit to them Yeah So that was

That was a weird weird feeling Being on stage Like trying to have fun playing while people are, like, launching cans. They were having fun throwing the bottles at us. It seemed like friendly throws or no? Yes. Some of them seemed like friendly throws. One, I remember, seemed like a hostile throw.

And then I, yeah. Have you ever seen the videos at the Preakness when, like, everybody's running across the port-a-potties and people are hucking beers at them? Yes. It was like that. Yikes, Nick. That's bad.

It was like one of my bigger waves, too. I've never seen that ever. It was extended arm. It was like a Native American chief. That was a fucking full-ass wave, and she motored by you. That's okay. Should we have her on the show? Why not? Yeah. You want me to get her? Yeah. Full ass wave, and she motored by you. That's okay. Should we have her on the show? Why not?

Yeah. Uh-huh. You want me to get her? Yeah. You want me to get her? It's like 15 minutes. She might say no. Boys.

She says no, she says no. What are your obloes later today? I'm going to the Drake concert tonight. Oh, you are? Sunday. Me and Ron are going to Drake. Where's your seat? Nice.

Section 9. Cool. I'm 8. I was listening to something. Fuck. It is a straight line. Yeah. It's right behind someone. What were you about to say?

I was listening to Drizzy last night. What were you... Which album? The 21 Savage and Drake album. They're like, prepare? Yeah. Are you going, Seth? No.

Just preparing for Ron. What did you... What were some lyrics that you picked up? I think I said Red Ops for some reason, and then I was like, that's a song, isn't it? And then I listened to Red Ops. But that's not 21 and Drake. That's just 21 Savage.

That's like his first big album. 21 Savage loves to call people pussies in his song with Drake. He'll just say it real slow, or he'll just be like, pussy. Pussy. Pussy. What's the word? It kind of just looked like a pussy. Pussy. Pussy. What's the word? I kind of just look like a creep. You look like a creep.

It didn't go my way. No? You came back to not. She has somewhere to be. It was completely normal on her part. I just felt weird. And Nick and Kate? I think I just said, you want to come here?

You. Hey, you, come here. That's two L's. You go like this. Whistle? Yeah. A beckon? You can't beckon someone like that.

Nick, what are your obloes? Me? Yeah. I was thinking we'd go for a while today. You're asking obloes? You order some lunch and some dinner in here? We go long. Dinner?

I'm enjoying this. You only have Bob Fox for so long. I 100% am enjoying this. It's only been 19 minutes. That'll change quick. I'm running out of steam right now. You got what at 8.30? Tux fitting.

Robbie and Co. Me? Well, no. That's the name of it. I think it's coincidental. Yeah, they're good guys over there, I heard. Are you going to get tails on your tux? I can see you looking fly with some tails.

What the hell is that? Have you ever seen a tuxedo with the two tails? Oh, no. The long things that hang. Jeeves. That looks like shit. You don't like that? You'd be looking like an Alfred.

You'd be looking like Sam. Yeah. A Studebaker. Yeah, what are you getting tuxed up for? Whose wedding is it? And what kind of wedding is making you wear a fucking Zito? What do you mean? You're going to

going to Tahoe. First time. Never been. Always wanted to go for my boy, Pat. OK, shout out, Pat. Yeah, guy coach a baseball coach

at Fordham. Oh, shit. What's the tux for then? The wedding. You're in the wedding party. Oh, no, it's a suit. Oh, yeah. not a tux.

What's the difference? Tux is a little more aggressive. It's a black tie. That's a black, you got a black suit. Black suit, yeah. Black suit. Yeah, yeah. A tux is like the cummerbund and...

Right, yeah, no, not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that.

Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that.

Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that.

Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that.

Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that.

Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that.

Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. Not all that. T-eye suspenders. And like the lapel has like, does it have like a different shade maybe or a different type of,

a different type of, what the hell are you smiling at? Did you feel beautiful at your wedding or were you just an accessory to the bride? I was an accessory to the bride. As it should be. Yeah, yeah. I'm not supposed to be out there.

When we used to get fitted for tuxes for, like we'd rent them for prom and everyone had like, what is the thing that you wear? Cumberbund. Cumberbund. And you know how they're like pretty low there's like what is like three buttons yeah the one that they gave me i didn't realize it until the day of prom it went like all the way up it literally looks like they had you in like a girdle you look like uh like a straight jacket Straight jacket Yeah It was crazy Her hips had to be I was so mad

Yeah I was pissed Is there photos of this? I could probably find it You have to find it It was way bigger than my friends Making those group photos It went up real high

It went up high That's preposterous Picturing like the old way People used to wear their towels After they got out of the shower. Well, I do it now. Wear them up to the nips? Yeah.

I wear mine. I wear mine all the way up to the nips. How do y'all wear a towel? You guys are weird. You're wearing towels? Right below my towel in the shower. I put it up to the nips. And I will walk to my bedroom like a scurry.

And then I don't even want to get naked. I put my underwear on underneath my towel. At home alone? I literally did that today. I put my underwear on underneath my towel. At home alone? I literally did that today. I put my underwear on with the towel on and then put the shirt on. What?

I don't want to see you. I don't want to even, yeah, I don't want to even catch a glimpse of myself. You need exposure therapy to yourself. What do you mean?

Oh. And you put the towel on tight. Yeah. Yeah. Suppresses everything. So your dick doesn't flop out? No, I don't want to see stomach. My body.

My torso. Oh, boys. I'm usually on the same wavelength about that type of shit, but I'm walking to my underwear drawer naked. No. I shower, towel off, and I walk to my underwear drawer naked. You can't be naked in your own house. You have gymnophobia? Yeah, probably.

You're a never nude? I don't think I'm a never nude, but I try to see my dick three times a day, Max. It's too little. What? Hey, you. Hey. Hey, Bradley. Oh, it's his birthday.

Happy birthday? Bradley. Bradley. Bradley. Bradley's 21. Bradley. 21 in dog years. Nice. Oh, that's a savage 21. Bradley. 21 in dog years. Nice.

Oh, that's a savage 21. He's so mature for his age. Wow. Kyle stepped on him this morning playing Wii Tennis. I was going for a streak, and he ran in my way. I heard the saddest yell. Who put this shit dog here? Are you going to apologize?

Like, no. I was playing sports games on the PS5. Dude, sports games are so goddamn boring. I don't know how anyone plays those. I was beating the computer 10-0 in MLB. Put it harder. I was trying to figure out how. I think I was on the max level.

It's too easy. You were not on the max level. There ain't no way you were on the max level. Dude, those games are hard. The max level. Dude, any time I play Mad on the max level. Dude, those games are hard. Anytime I play like Madden or something, I win like 1,000 to 0. You're on rookie. Those games are so easy.

No, they're not. NHL. No, they're not. I don't know how someone can sit down and play. I'm the yak if you play in a game. I'll play a game. I mean, dude, you literally, MLB The Show might be the easiest game of all time. Because you're playing it on easy. I couldn't figure out how to make it harder.

That doesn't mean that it's an easy game. That's your problem. You're so bad at gaming I couldn't figure out how to make it harder. That doesn't mean that it's an easy game. You're so bad at gaming you don't know how to make it harder. You don't know how to operate the settings. I need a game with guns in it. Lots of guns.

Yeah, baseball, I don't know how people play that. But FIFA is like the elite sports video game. So boring. That's false. I like Madden more than FIFA. Really? I think Madden's also awesome. I like Madden more than FIFA. Really?

I think Madden's also awesome. I like NHL a lot, too. Madden has a toxic community. All video games do. Actually, I will say NBA is pretty good. I think any free-flowing game, that's why I like FIFA. All of them, NBA is the one you go with?

NBA is way better. How do you play NBA with people? I like a game where you're passing it around and you're controlling everything. Hockey, NHL. NHL is good. Sounds like soccer to me, brother. The best NHL games were the 2K ones, but I think they stopped making those after 2K13.

I know. I was trying to explain to someone yesterday what it does to me when the door is a little bit open. It's distracting as hell. I can't think either. Haven't these people ever heard of? Closing the door. God damn, no. bit open it's distracting as hell yeah i can't think either haven't these people ever heard of closing god tom torr no robbie you how many concerts have you been 2023 not a lot to be honest this year not you have stacked more than everybody in here combined 10 maybe yeah and in this year alone maybe yeah that's a lot that's a fuck that's oh that's like almost two a month

i think that's my lifetime statistics. Can you go through all the ones you've been through? More than I've been to. List them off. This year was, I can't even think of one I went to. I went to the All Time Low. Stay Champs. Did you see Rage Against the Machine?

That was last year, I think. I think that was the end of last year. I used to have a list in my phone, but I haven't been keeping it this year. A couple festivals. I saw, who was the band i interviewed that i saw oh yellow card i just saw yellow cards oh they just they're what did he say in his interview with you that they're selling fucking seven times what they've ever sold yeah why is he he can't explain it he's like they retired in 2016 retired in 2016. Retired in 2016. And they were selling out venues that were like maybe 1,000 cap,

like 1,300 cap, 2,000 in California. And now they came back, and they're selling out like 6,000, 7,000 seat venues. They haven't put out. Nostalgia is cheap. And like the fans are ordering them money to spend maybe. I don't know. Actually, he said, but he was like, I can't account for it because even if that was the case, even if they were all bringing their families and we're rich now, there's a

revamped nostalgia. It's crazy. Nostalgia is coming back. How are you going to dance at Drake tonight? I've never been to a hip hop. That's why I was going to ask. What is your move? Either of you. Can you do one of Drake's moves?

Or is that like wearing a Drake shirt to the concert? Did you see the video on Barstools that Barstool put up of all the women wearing the same glasses on their head? I didn't even know that was a fucking trend. But it seems like a lot of people are dressing similarly for Drake. They're all wearing like fucking wraparound sunglasses, like white sunglasses like up on their head. Sports goggles? No, they're like the fucking, I don't know like white sunglasses like up on their head. Sports goggles? No, they're like the fucking, I don't know. It's on Barstool's Twitter,

but there was like 20 people wearing it. It looked like they were like in a bachelorette party, like all dressed the same, but I think they were all randomly. So I don't think I'm going to, I'm not going to try and do too much. I think when you're dancing, I think when you do do a little bit less,

unless you're really fucking... Unless you're real good. I feel like also a white guy move is definitely, it's mostly hands. Shoulders? It's all hands. One hand up. Yeah, one hand up. Then imagine Spider at a Drake concert. Spider is like a whole vibe, if I may.

Dancing up and down the aisles. Yeah, Spider is... That's a thing? I had no idea that this was a thing. Oh, wow? I had no idea that this was a thing. Oh, wow. I had no idea that this was a thing. Really strange. This makes me mad.

Yeah, well, let's look at the comments. It's all like, all of them are the same. I hate girls. Twitter is feeding me intellectual racists now. Oh, yeah. Intellectual sexists. They use big words and paragraphs. I thought you meant, yeah. It was very smart. Oh, yeah. Intellectual sexists. They use big words and paragraphs. Oh, I thought you meant,

yeah. It was very smart. They get it. Yeah, wow. That's a wild time. Where is he playing? Barclays or MSG? Barclays for the next

couple days, and then, uh... MSG Sunday. MSG Sunday. Oh, nice. I saw Drake linked up with Bernice Burgos. Bitches are dumb.

Shout out Master Chief. Yeah. Who's Bernice? Who's Bermie? I don't know. I just saw that on the Daily Loud page. Is it a girl? I think so.

They're calling him a groupie. Links up with whoever's hot. I mean, he can have sex with whomever he wants. I agree. You know he works it. What? He would crack you open like a fucking coconut, dude. He would be inside of you in less than five minutes, dude.

One stroke is all you need. He wouldn't even get to you. One stroke is all it takes. He would get to Julian Casablanca. Half a stroke. There was like someone years ago, a woman purported to have had sexual relations with him and did a detailed account and detailed that he was a very generous lover

and that he had a cocaine. He had a what? Cocaine. A cocaine. Wide, wide dick. He also is famous for the hot sauce, right? Hot sauce and the condom. Make sure that...

Oh, Drizzy? ...you all can't poke the hole and get the... And that's what we know about. Imagine what we don't. You know what I mean? Those things, yeah. Imagine the little tricks of the trade that he has that have never really made it out.

I know I'd be fucking around with Drake, probably trying to make him laugh, and he'd put his... Nikki enough. You're wasting your time talking. He probably would have inside jokes with you immediately. I think his emotional intelligence has to be off the fucking charts.

He's the best. He can just walk up to you and say, what's up, Clicky? I guarantee he would. I guarantee he'd be on some slick shit like that. That fucking bastard. My favorite Drake conspiracy theory was right when his son got unveiled to the world with the Pusha T song. Oh, yeah. People thought maybe the son's name is Mabed.

I think it is. It's his middle name. Is it really? Yes. No way. What is the significance of that? He said, I only love my bed and my mama. I'm sorry.

My bed. And that's literally the kid's name. No fucking way is that his real name. Look it up, dude. It's his son's middle name. Because who would say, I only love my bed? Drake. But people.

No. Mabed. No one ever talks about loving my bed. Drake. But people, no. My bed. No one ever talks about loving their bed. But after that summer, everybody was like, I fucking do love my bed. That diss track was crazy. Crazy. Pusha T? Yeah.

OVO 40 hunched over like he's 80. He can't even go to Canada, bro. He can't even go to Toronto. He can't go to the Ends anymore. No, can't to Toronto. He can't go to the Ends anymore. Oh, can't do it? He's not welcome in the Ends. He's not welcome on Spadina. What sparks that? Why did Pusha T make that song?

I remember when it came out. Drady? I believe Pusha T on his album made a comment about Kanye and Drake. And Drake took a shot at Pusha and said, like, keep my name out of your mouth. And then Pusha went back. I think Pusha set up his own diss track.

Whoa. Baited Drake into hitting a diss track. He probably brought the track first. That's very naughty. That's very naughty of him. But I guess, I mean, that's a great time for Twitter. Diss tracks, yeah. And there are still people who suck in Pusha T's dick that are like,

yeah, you fucking bested, but you can't even go to the ends anymore. You know? Bias. Of course I am. I love Pusha T, too. I opened for Pusha T. Oh, what? Was he from Virginia?

In Philly. Yeah, he was from Virginia. 757. And then, like, Black Thought, I think, came up at the end of the show. I went on stage, did a verse, called myself White Thought. It was fucking legendary

at this place called The Blockley in Philly. What's your fit? Probably something absolutely trash. Have you ever seen Roan's old rap battles and what they're all rocking? Like the really old ones. Pay attention to they're all rocking? Like the really old ones. Pay attention to the lyrics. You gotta watch the really old ones with Wallace

in the background and he's wearing like a fucking sideways flat cap and one shorts. Literally 2008. It's so funny. Very stylish back then. A flat cap and like the baggiest airbrush tee or some shit like that.

I used to wear the flattest Louisville hat. Yeah? Yeah. Fuck yes. I could definitely see you rocking the Cookie Monster flat cap. Oh, I rocked that. You rocked the Cookie Monster? Yeah, you did.

I actually had the Elmo. My friend Mike had the Cookie Monster. There was dudes that would roll up with the Cookie Monster and also the Cookie Monster tee. They would wear the full outfit and some like, some thick-ass glasses. Yeah, some fat-ass. Bob or Domingo. Big Osiris. I'm pretty sure I had the Elmo shirt.

Oh, yeah. And I did the thing where you went on picnic and you made the whole picture black and white except the hat and the shirt. Oh, yeah. And it was red. Yeah. Zass had that flat bill with, like with the big metal word dope on it. And the shirt that just says, cool story, bro. In massive font.

Cool story, bro had a choke hold on society for at least a year. It was longer than that, dude. People were rocking that. That's good, though. If that started now, it would be good. But that almost killed storytelling. Yeah. It almost killed oral tradition. I think it kind of did started now, it would be good. But that almost killed storytelling. Yeah. It almost killed oral tradition.

I think it kind of did. I think it kind of did. Do we ever tell full stories, any of us on this show? Not really. We're bad storytellers, too. I used to have a hoodie that I got on the Jersey Shore that had a quote from the show Jersey Shore that just said, Come at me, bro. Oh, yeah.

That's a good one. That's hilarious that they even claim that quote. Is that where that quote came from? No, but Ronnie used to say it, I think. It's funny saying something and it's like, this is my phrase. Be like, let's go. Yeah. Attributed to Roan.

Yeah. Let's go. One of those just black hoodies, white text, neon paint splatter. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I want to make a request of the NFL this year, and it's to get a dance that replaces the Gritty after touchdowns. Okay.

Do you think that that's fair? You think that the Gritty has had three years. I think the Gritty is just getting warmed up. He's had three straight years of being the premier touchdown dance. You have suggestions? The human body can only do so much. Have we done it all? I don't know.

I think it's, I mean, then maybe we go back to like a fucking waltz or something shit like that. Everything is referential, like maybe some ballroom dancing

or something. But we just need something new. I'm looking at, see the picture of Kim Kardashian doing the cartwheel? No.

No, but I'd like to. I don't know why. It's a picture or a video. Her proportions are strange. Yeah, and- He's short as hell. He's like 4'11". Upside down there, stranger.

All right, pull that up. Pull up her Instagram. She posted it on Instagram. Just a normal- I need to see those. Oh, okay. Oh. Hold on.

Oh. Not that one. That one. Oh. Isn't that a weird picture for some reason? Look at it. It looks like she's a Lego. Bared it for 30 seconds. It's on a tash. Your. Not that one. That one. Oh. Isn't that a weird picture for some reason? Look at it. It looks like she's a Lego. Stare at it for 30 seconds.

It's going to attach to your legs onto her. Go back to, yeah, this one. Hold up. Go back. Go back. Oh, Jesus Christ. Moving fast. This is a stop motion film now.

One more. This one. That one. Yeah, that looks insane. All right, let's take. Stare at it for a while. Let's take 30 seconds on this. Now it becomes inhuman.

Yeah, it looks like she. Ah! Looks like an MC Escher to me. It looks like it for a while. It takes 30 seconds on this. Now it becomes inhuman. It looks like an M.C. Escher to me. It looks like it's Photoshopped. Some dolly paintbrush. But it looks like she's standing on her hair. Thank you. She's falling. It honestly does look more normal like that. That looks way more normal.

Yeah, because that's how... That looks insane. I saw that this morning, and I was like, that looks weird. Do you follow her? Yeah. I think she can squat, like, 315 for reps. Squat like Rayshon Slater? Yeah.

She just squats with, like, the chains hanging off the sides. She would have hazed the fuck out of some people at Northwestern. Bar is bending. Yeah. You see Nick Chubb squat yesterday? Oh, my God. As a weightlifter, you have to appreciate how this dude was fucking squatting. Because I guess they bend the bar now.

They do like a floppy bent bar. Oh, my God. Oh, there it is. Look at that shit. Yeah. He's a fucking skill position. Oh, there it is. Look at that shit. He's a fucking skill position. Can't imagine getting to the level of lifting where you have to have three spotters. Also, if he failed,

what would they be able to do? Call next of kin. Yeah. Is it just in case if he passes out and falls back so it doesn't go on his neck or something? I don't know. Is this a loop or is he doing five reps of things? Okay. Wow.

That's fucking crazy. I was telling you, the girls at the gym squat like crazy. They go hard. That's all they're doing. You know what they're doing. Have you ever seen the dudes at the gym that do the leg press and they put all of the 45s on it and then they're like,

it's too light for them still, so they put they just start stacking 45s on random parts of the machine. Anywhere that'll hold it. Yeah, just on top of the machine. But unless they got that great range of motion, I really don't respect it. Yeah. I need to see that. There really is no need to do that.

How strong do your legs need to be? Yeah. If you're leg pressing, like, 1,000 pounds, it's like... You need to go to 1,200. If I tried to squat, like, my asshole would shoot out of my body at, like, 400 miles an hour. Have you ever seen the videos of the dudes like shitting their pants? Squatting? Those are good. Funny. Weightlifting? Oh, I hate these videos.

Don't show me. Knees snapping. I hate the knee snapping. They're just stacked on the thing. You'd think his legs would be a little bigger. Oh! Oh! Wow, I'm shocked that something happened when he did that.

Great leg press kill in the new John Wick. Really? In 4? Yeah. There's a leg press kill? Like on a machine? Yeah. What's your best movies this year?

Final Destination shit. John Wick 4 is up there. Really? John Wick 4 was so sick, yeah. Really? You saw it in theaters? No, I missed out. Of course, you hate theaters, I forgot. You watch Sisu yet? Oh, yeah. Sisu was sick. I saw you was so sick, yeah. Really? You saw it in theaters? No, I missed out. Of course, you hate theaters, I forgot.

You watch Sisu yet? Oh yeah, Sisu was sick. I did, I didn't watch it yet. It's fire? Yeah, it's real good. Fuck, I gotta watch it. Should I watch it alone or should I watch it with wifey? Alone. Yeah, she would get it. It's a dude's movie. It's got time.

I love that. Where's the romance? Shut up. Yeah. I love that. Where's the romance? Shut up. Enough. She's crinkling the bag of Dots pretzels. A rewind. I'm in your shoes. Yeah. Fucking infuriate.

Do you guys label the actors that you know? Like, hey, that's blank. Oh, he's from this. Oh, totally. I pretend like I don't know. Like, hey, that's blank. Oh, he's from this. Oh, totally. I pretend like I don't know. I was like, is that the guy from... I'm not good at it, though, so it's just like, oh, what do we know him from?

And then I call it the IMDB. That's what I do. And then it's never who I think it is. I'm like, oh, that guy's been in nothing that I've seen. He looks like Matt Damon. But what about... Have you seen Avatar, Way of Water? I did.

I was underwhelmed. Really? Yeah. Fuck. Fuck. I thought it was fine. Way too long. Zoe Saldana?

Zoe Saldana, yeah. She was 23 in the first one, and when the last one comes out, she's going to be 54. Holy fuck. Jesus Christ. She hasn't aged a bit, though. Kate Winslet was in the new one. Didn't even realize that until a couple months after I saw it. Who does she play? The young Jamaican boy? Holy fuck. Jesus Christ. She hasn't aged a bit, though. Kate Winslet was in the new one. Didn't even realize that until a couple months after I saw it.

Who does she play? The young Jamaican boy? No, she's one of the blue people. Really? Yeah. That's Winslet? And apparently they almost killed her on set. What?

Yeah, James Cameron almost killed her. There's a scene where it gets flooded, and she was underwater for like seven minutes. It's hilarious that they actually put the actors underwater when it's all CGI. Yeah. Yeah the whole movie is CGI but for that

one. No no we're going to need you to feel like you're almost dying. There is a drowning there are like drowning ish scenes. Oh yeah.

I guess if you're in the way of water there's going to be some shit like that. No spoiler. There's a drowning scene in Now You See Me the Jesse Eisenberg

magician movie that is real. I think it's Isla Fisher was in the water tank, and they could not get her out, and the panic on her face is real, and they left it in the movie. Oh, wow. She could... Oh, God. Is that a new movie? No.

Is it good? It's a good movie. Yeah, it new movie? No. Is it good? It's a good movie. Yeah, it's very watchable. Yeah. Did you see the movie, what is the fucking movie about the two Korean kids, and they, like, separate when they're young, and then they get back together as adults? Did not see it, no. Crushes on Rotten Tomatoes, audience and critic?

I did not. It was elite, but I'm trying to see. I'm trying to get ahead of whatever the fucking Oscar movies are going to be now. What is the... Is Spider-Man going to be an Oscar nom? It'll be for animated, but I don't think

it'll break out of that. I saw some list that was predicting it to be a best picture nom. Tomorrow, me, Clem, and KFC are going to Barbenheimer.

We're doing both. Doing both? Wow. Is that a big thing that people are doing? Because someone was telling me that they were like, do you want to go see both?

I think so. I was like, no, I would just go see Open House. It's the first time in history two movies have been in theater at the same time. Yeah. It seems like it.

I was like, I don't really have much of an urge to see Barbie. I kind of do. I've been hearing it's great. Really? I can't tell if Barbie is going to be like an Oscar movie

or if it's just going to be a fun people laugh at it movie. So what is it? It's doing well on Rotten Tomatoes? It's in like 94 or some shit. It's projected to make $50 million more than Oppenheimer. Do cutesy movies still do good on Rotten Tomatoes? Like that?

I mean, this Asian one was cutesy as hell and it fucking crushed it. Is it called Split? Split? No, that's like Mr. Shyamalan. Unbreakable. Yeah. Sorry. Pretty good movie.

Trying to get into movies. 89, 94. We don't have any audience score for Oppenheimer. 89 went down because they're still watching it. I've seen it. Three hours is tough.

I don't have it in me, man. You don't have it in you to watch the three hour movie? For Nolan, man. I don't have it in me, man. You don't have it in you to watch the three-hour movie? For Nolan, man. I don't have it in me. For Nolan? Don't have it in me. What about Blackberry?

Will that get any Oscar noms? Loved that. That movie was so good. I didn't see it. Oh, it's really good. I could see it. At least some acting noms. I could see Glenn Howard getting an acting nom.

Probably not, though. Yeah. He was so funny in that. He kind of played some Always Sunny. He slipped into character a couple times. I don't know if that was on purpose, though. Yeah. He was so funny in that. He kind of played some Always Sunny. He slipped into character a couple times. I don't know if that was on purpose though.

I mean he's been doing that role for like 20 years right? Yeah. Great role. Crazy how long that show's been on. Longest running live

action show. Yeah. Tip of the fucking cap to those fucking guys. I've been watching the new season. New episode's actually out today on Hulu.

It's been okay. Gotta go watch it. Last've been watching the new season. New episode's actually out today on Hulu. It's been okay. I gotta go watch it. Last episode was really funny, I thought. Which one? The bowling episode. I didn't see it. That was funny. Damn, that sounds funny.

Yeah, it does. That sounds fucking hilarious. Like the prison shit? That shit sounds elite. What's good with the dozen? Honkers are in, Yaxon. Honkers are in? Yeah. in. Honkers are in? Yeah.

Let's fucking go. Frank, that's out. No! Yeah. No longer a team. That breaks my fucking heart. You guys had such a good run. Frank dubbed Pat Bev so hard.

He was. You're a legend. Pat Bev went up to him trying to, like, dap him up. He was like, thanks. Frank wasn't in the middle of a game of Blitz, was he? Yeah, he was crushing Blitz. He said, when I talked to him today, he was like, yeah, I was in the middle of a computer game. A fucking arcade game, a computer game is hilarious.

This office is going to become just like a playpen. Like there's not like, we got games everywhere now. They're going to get a pool table. You got the Wii set up. You got the PlayStation set up. You got the PlayStation set up. Pool table is going to be loud. It's a loud game. How do you play pool?

It's just the clanging of the balls, I mean. I guess. When you break, that's like bowling alley's next. Hell no. You can hear it in pins. Someone could play pool next to you while you're sleeping and you wouldn't wake up. No, dude. No.

I don't know. Pool is pretty loud. Pool is gunshot after gunshot. Actually, I've never heard someone describe pool as a loud game. Pool is loud. It is in a house, yeah. You ever been to a pool hall? Every day.

Pretty much every day. Ever rip a couple of cigs in a pool hall? It is loud in there. You got to yell. Yeah, it's silent in there. Yeah, it is loud in there. You've got to yell. Yeah, it's silent in there. It's like a library. You think there could be a pool table in a library?

There would be no complaints? I guess the break would be kind of... For the break, people think an earthquake went off. The break is so loud. Like someone closing a book too loud in a library? No. It's equivalent to 12 shelves falling in succession.

I don't know where I lie on this. I don't know if pool is loud. Pool table, yes they are. I don't know. YouTube, just regular pool table. Or just search on Quora, is pool loud? Can you Quora this, please? Can we chat GDP this?

What's the decibels of a pool ball getting smacked? It has a big range. You could go from very quiet to very quickly gets loud. Let's hear it. This is a pool all people aren't playing in. What are they doing in the pool? Is it front? Can you turn that the fuck down?

I mean that was loud Trying to think About to burst You just wait You're gonna walk in here Are you getting a noise complaint for playing pool too loud? Can't tell if those were fireworks or a game of pool You're gonna think there's an active shooting the next time you walk in here

Sounds like where Chris Kyle died Oh man This is so annoying You're going to think there's an active shooting the next time you walk in here. Sounds like where Chris Kyle died. Oh, man. This is so annoying. What, that you can't find a video? No, I'm just playing it. You hear it? Oh, because it's so goddamn quiet.

It's loud as fuck. You don't have your headphones on. I'm one foot away from him. He's playing it into the mic. It's the conversation. It's really the conversation that fucking ruins it. And the promiscuity of the... I'll give you a good pool sound effect. What do you have, a soundboard?

No, I'm going to open up the pool. Remember soundboards? On my phone. Okay, yeah. Oh, yeah. Soundboards are great. He's a big prank caller. Clem was a soundboard maker.

Did you know that? That was loud as fuck. That was loud. I just jumped. I just shit my pants. Kind of nice, though. One more, one more. TJ, can you...

TJ, can you... Did you leave a comment to be like, warning headphone users? Warning, you're raped. And then parentheses first. I think I might be wrong. I think it's silent as hell. All right, ready?

Here, I'll break. It sounded like dentures closing. Nothing. Ready? Let me make sure this is. And I'm going to go 100% max speed. Oh, silent. Ah.

Rest in peace, max speed. Must have turned the sound effects off. That was booze too noisy. Here. That's actually probably why. Oh. Fuck. You hear that one?

Pretty loud. Restart. We'll do a clean one. Clean break. Oh, my God. Sounded like a Tommy gun. What the fuck is that? That's Kevin McAllister lighting a firecrackers in a pot.

I've already moved to Chicago. Yeah. Oh, God. They do die out there. You just wait. We're going to get that table. It's going to be a battlefield. I know.

People are going to be pissed, but people are pissed about everything that happens. Yeah. Like, the couches are nice to sit on. I've been feeling a brotherhood that I've never felt. Same. Free-flowing conversations happening very easily. God forbid someone lies down on a couch. Oh, yeah, you've been getting someone passed.

Why do you lie on the same couch facing the same way? Yeah, what does that mean? Lie down. Every time somebody walks through, it's like, comfortable, Kyle. There's like nine other couches. I wish I had a desk. Yeah.

I don't know why all the dudes right there got to keep their desks, but we got all our desks. Those are going away soon. We got an email that says it's free for all. For now? Yeah, for now. And then they're going to assign desks. So I guess those guys are just coming in and they're early on it.

Yeah, Enrique's going to assign desks. I haven't seen him in a while, though. Have you been able to find your box? Oh, they hid the boxes. Hid the boxes? Yeah. As long as they have them. Yeah. Yeah, they do. I haven't seen him in a while though I don't know what happened to the box Have you been able to find your box? Oh they hid the boxes Hid the boxes? Yeah As long as they have them Yeah

Yeah they do Enrique is in charge of desks I haven't seen him down in a while The people in charge of the barstool awards They're like giving out awards from like This like something that happened in like 2008 When everybody was wearing

Cookie Monster hats And like they all just started working here They don't know the real barstool. Nah. Yeah, I got to present something like an old-ass thing, and I'm like, I am not the guy for that. Wait, Tass, I saw the run of the show. You know that you're presenting the last award of the night? Oh, no, I didn't know that.

Wait, did you see it? Yeah. Is he really? Which one am I presenting? Do you not know? That's weird. Mine's not even like a big one. What are the categories?

Mine's just like a random category. Mine's best OG barstool video. It's a big one. That's a big one. What are the categories? It's just like a random category. Mine's best OG barstool video. It's a big one. That's a big one? What are you talking about? Yeah, that's a huge one. That's like the closer? Yeah.

Yeah, it's big. What else? We don't have a best actor. Should I say them? Should I say them all? Yeah. You're the only one that really can't get in trouble, so. Why not?

Let them fly. Let them fly? Fuck it. Laman's going to yell at you? For the record, I. Let him fly? Fuck it. Blattman's going to yell at you? For the record, I'm telling you not to do it. They sent us the list. You could take Blattman in a fight. No way.

No way. I don't think so. I think you're scrappy. No, no, no. I'm cerebral, but that doesn't play in the same way when everybody has a plan until you get hit with a fat ass in the mouth. Should I say who's presenting each one of them to give a teaser? No, give a couple.

Don't don't give like goats and goats. Say what you say. Don't. I would just say the whole thing. What? I thought you said. I don't think it really matters. Yeah.

I don't think it really matters. I mean, it's not like. Yeah. Joe open Dave monologue. Wait, can I ask a question? Okay, you've said too much already. Is there a public... Are we selling tickets to it?

I mean, we're doing it at a big venue. I don't know. I really don't know. Suck. I've heard both ways. It would suck to bomb. I think the idea was it to be a VIPs thing and then potentially like sponsors

and then potentially people, but I don't know if that's been decided yet. There's going to be something calleds thing and then potentially like sponsors and then potentially people. But I don't know if that's been decided yet. There's going to be something called Biggest Villain. That's one of the last ones. That's a good one. Now, is it like

you have to be currently working here or the villain of the company? I don't know. Oh, that's a good question. Like someone we actually hate or someone we endearingly hate? Who is some people that are endearingly hated amongst us? Like Brandon Walker is endearingly hated on the yak, I would say.

Yeah. Yeah. What about someone... Would you say he's a villain? I wouldn't say he's a villain. No, he's not a villain. He's not a villain. Like Minahan, people would say is a villain. Yeah, Minahan's a villain. He's not a villain. Like, Minahan, people would say,

is a villain. Yeah, Minahan's a villain. Yeah, he is. I keep thinking this is within the, this is all time. All time.

Oh, yeah, there's a lot to choose from. Yeah, this will be good. Biggest villain, best OG video. That's it. Then we take a bus back.

Yep. All together. Like a single back. Yep. All together. Like a single-A baseball team. I'm definitely not going to do that. Actually, wait. Do we have to be on the Yaks the rest of the week after that? I'm probably going to stay in Boston. We don't have Thursday and Friday Yaks that week.

I think me and Kyle move to Chicago the next day. No. We've got to make a day. Yeah. Y'all are doing it together? Well, we're going to try to share a truck to make it day. Yeah. Y'all are doing it together? Well, we're going to try to share a truck to make it cheaper.

Yeah, we don't have much. Are you guys driving? No. We'll probably just hire a mover and then fly. Speaking of, Kate is driving right now. Yeah.

She's in the throes of the drive. We should get her to call in and see if she should give us maybe an update or some shit like that. Maybe I'll text.

Oh, man, I've been farting like crazy over here. You guys been smelling it? No, not over here. Good. Why are you farting so much? You weren't drinking beers last night? Hey. I was drinking beers last night.

You're itching a little bit? Probably just a little bit. You're itching a little bit? In the hole? Yeah. No, I don't have it in the hole. You sure? Probably a little bit, though. Not even a little. Let's see. Not even like a little bit? Probably just a little bit. You're itching a little bit? In the hole? Yeah. No, I don't have it in the hole. You sure? Probably a little bit, though.

Not even a little. Let's see. Not even like a tiny bit. Let's smell. Why would you want to smell? Do a scratch and sniff. Scratch your asshole, and if your fingers stink, then your hole stinks. Your asshole always smells.

That's not true. If you smell my asshole right now. Your asshole always smells? No, no, no. Yes. Wait a minute. That's not true at all. smell my asshole right now. Your asshole always smells? No, no, no. Yes. Wait a minute. That's not true at all. There's all...

An asshole never smells like nothing. Yeah, it does. Yeah, it does. No way. It does. Yes, it does. It does. It's an asshole.

Right after a shower, it smells like nothing. Or like soap. Like the back of my hand smells like soap right now. Or like clean skin. There's never a lack of a smell. It kind of smells like a tongue. No. Tongue is more disgusting than asshole There's never a lack of a smell. It kind of smells like a tongue. No. No.

A tongue is more disgusting than an asshole. The roof of a mouth. Maybe right after someone has eaten the ass. Come on. Sass, does your asshole always have a smell? I think everyone's asshole always has a smell. Have you smelled it yourself? No.

Then how do you know? I would have smelled it myself. So then how would you know? It's like a scorpion position. I guess you could touch your finger. Scorpion. Scorpion. Fucking scorpion.

Unbelievable. Just text a kid. Jay tweeted that someone at the park just made fun of my shirt. I saw that. Who's going to the park and making fun of adults shirt. I saw that. Who's going to the park and making fun of adults' shirts? Yeah, I don't think that. I don't know. It'd be hilarious if he was wearing

the who-weighed-all-the-pussy shirt. Who the fuck would make fun of this? I could see someone being like, oh, where's your sleeves? Maybe. But that's the only thing I could picture. I could see how he could get made fun of. Where's the rest of that shirt, brother? What does he look like?

He looks like an archetype of something that I can't even put my finger on. Yeah, the first comment, maybe. I don't know. He's got enough 5 o'clock shadow that... I don't know. It's an interesting look. I like that look. He looks strong.

He does. Fucking Jay. Always on fucking vacation, man. No fucking work ethic. When's he moving out? I don't know. I don't know either. When do you go to Montauk?

Friday after the show. Good shit. Good shit. Just two days there. It'll be fun. Yeah. Is it going to be good weather? It's going to be beautiful. Just two days there. It'll be fun. Yeah. Is it gonna be good weather? It's gonna be beautiful. Just get a little bit of a tan. I haven't really got that much

sun this summer. You gonna see Drizzy? I don't think so. I don't think he'll be there. I think he's gonna be playing for Nick. That sucks. He would love Montauk. That's how you're about to dance? That's how you're gonna dance, Robbie? That's how I would dance if I went to Drizzy.

What's like the, when you go to a concert, do you drink a lot? Do you get fucked up? Me? I feel like you'd have to piss a lot. Yeah. No, I don't drink. Well, I, sometimes I do, but very rarely. Yeah, we were trying to guess on a show, like, what your vices were.

Weed. Okay. You don't drink? I feel like I've seen you drink. Sometimes I do. I'll have a high noon here and there, but like. You don't get like fucked up? No.

Oh, speaking of, bro. High noon. Tequila seltzer. Love it. Have you done the tequilas? They're fucking fire. What's your go-to flavor? For the tequilas, lime.

For the regulars, peach. Yeah, the lime are my favorite for the tequilas, followed by grapefruit. I like grapefruit. I mean, passion fruit is awesome. And then the strawberry is also just like, strawberry just has that novelty factor that really knocks people's socks off. But 100 calories, gluten-free, perfect for a cold day. I had friends over a while ago, and I've ordered too many high noons, but I bought them.

Such thing? Well, too many for that weekend. But I bought them. I didn't buy them cold, so I'm about to take them to a new apartment and put them in there. I'm going to pregame in my new apartment before I move in, and I'm going to have some high noons and have a fucking night. And you can do the exact same thing. Go to Drizzly or your local convenience or liquor store or visit highnoonspirits.com to find some highnoons

near you. I'm moving into a new apartment soon and I need a chair. And I don't know what even kind of chair to get. I know your ass is going to Eames. I know you're going to Eames. Francis has an Eames and he's like I'm not about to buy an Eames. I'm you're going to Eames. Francis has an Eames and he's like I'm not about to buy an Eames.

I'm moving into Francis' building. Oh, are you? And so I'm not going to have an Eames. You'd be the only person in that building that doesn't have an Eames. I can't have an Eames. What is an Eames? What is an Eames? Eames is the chair. It's the lounge chair.

It's the chair's chair. You're looking for your chair to settle into. Let's pull it up so have probably seen it. It's the chair's chair. Let's talk prices. You're looking for like, yeah, you're looking for your chair to like settle into. Yes, I want to leave. Well, let's pull it up so everybody can see it. I want an Eames. Is an Eames a four-figure chair? It's gotta be. It's gotta be. It's like ergonomically perfect. It's the most perfectly designed chair.

Do you have one? No. Francis has one. Oh my god. It's a Herman Miller. Yeah. Oh, those chairs suck. Oh, it's a Herman Miller. We're sitting on Herman Millers back here right now. Oh, these are Herman Millers? You guys have Herman Miller at the office once. In the studio, yeah.

You can find those on Facebook Marketplace. Are you guys sure? I'd rather sit in a Lazy Boy. These are $1,800 in here. An Eames is a status. What are we looking at? What makes it Eames? What makes it $6,800?

Herman Miller. What makes it $6,800? It's made by Herman Miller. Francis has one of those. Francis has two. There's cheap Eameses. Could you type it? Eames dupe.

Eames dupe. Go to wish.com. It doesn't look like a comfy chair at all. They are, but they're more of a status. It's an art piece. Not kidding. It really is. It's like, oh, you have

an chair. I would rather just get like a use or soaps. Is it? Yeah. I'd rather just get like a big like a big leather chair.

Yeah. Agreed. Maybe even like a used one. Real broken. Easy boy. Yeah. And does Eames have like

bloodhounds like do they shut down the dupes? Oh, fucking crazy. I want to spend four four figures on my cat. I don't know what to get her. I want to spend four figures on my cat. I don't know what to get her. I want to spend four figures on your cat. She uses the apartment way more

than I do. DJ, search $1,000 cat toy. Or like, why don't you just make a tunnel system for her. $3,000? $6,000. Down!

About $4,000 for a cat. What can I get? Search a $4,000? Up, up, up. $6,000. Down. About $4,000 for a cat. What can I get? Search a $4,000 cat tower. It's got to be like a tower or a system of tubes and pipes that they can... Cat playground. You got to start leaving me alone. Coming a problem.

Why don't you just buy high end fish for the cat She's not eating my pate She doesn't like pate It has to be gravy Should we order some pates What should we order Nick Oh Kyle There we go

Oh look at that How big is this What do we got Oh Kyle I want that I don't know if it's big enough For what you're paying, though. Is that a tiny cat?

It's $4,000. Lighting. It looks nice. That rules. I need it. I want to throw, like, a sweet 16-style party. Think your cat's going to make it to 16? I want that style of party.

Cats live for, for like 30 years? Yeah. 30? I thought 20. Maybe 20. I thought they lived for a really long time. Look at that cat in there. You got to put a...

KB, what does your cat look like? Black. Okay. I can picture it perfectly. Big ears. The ears are too big. She'd get made fun of if, like, she had peers. Or, like, humans.

The ears are so big, like, you can cover her eyes with them. You have her flamer for them? Yeah. You say. She's cute, I think. I like cats. I like all cats. Yeah.

I just got in trouble for saying the award stuff. Oh, did you? By who? I was on that text. Blatman. Blatman. Just like I said. I said, who's gonna yell at you?

Blatman? What'd he say? It was the cat. I mean... What the fuck, Roan? Well, that sucks. They're gonna have to redo all the awards. Roan, you look stressed. Yeah. I just got in trouble. Screamed at? Or just what part of Keep This Private

didn't you understand? That was the thing we both said. I'll jump in the hole with you here. We both were like, they didn't say keep it private. The final text said, please keep this private. Why did you get... I didn't get that. Because we gotta do... I shouldn't even say anymore.

Yeah. It was nice working with you guys. I had to stop you. I guess we'll start looking for apartments say anymore. Yeah. Yeah. It was nice working with you guys. Yeah. I had to stop you. Well, I guess we'll start looking for apartments in Chicago. Yeah. Oh, my God. Apologies, you know. And that's a deep drive to left.

Did you see Heath fought for Scooby-Doo being a superhero? Blatman? No, Nick Kest. Oh. What's his, how do you say his last name? Estelman? No, Nick Kest... Oh. What's his... How do you say his last name? Estelanos? Estelanos.

Yeah, he thinks... He fought for Scooby-Doo to be a superhero. I would say no. Why? He's a dog. He's a talking dog. He made a point...

What do you do to fight? I don't know exactly what he's... Would you say that an animal talking is a superpower? I would say no. I think it would... But he does more than that. No, he doesn't. He solves crime. it would. But he does more than that. No, he doesn't.

He solves crime. Like Batman. But he could... That's just because he has a personality and that's what he enjoys as a hobby. It's not a power. Batman. Not quite like Batman.

I feel like the world's dogs can solve crime, though. Yeah, you're right. Like good noses and shit. He eats snacks, too, yeah. So does Batman. He does, well... Have you ever seen Batman eat a snack? Yes. He does in the most and shit. He eats snacks too, yeah. So does Batman. He does, well. Have you ever seen Batman eat a snack? Yes. He does in the most recent one.

He eats blueberries. The Pattinson one, yeah. When he wakes up. Seen him. God, you're a dork. Sipping espresso. That's awesome. Yeah.

All right, guys. Thanks for having me on the app. Yeah, Rowan, you feel. Yeah, I feel like an idiot. Play Sporkle. Let's play Spork awesome. Yeah. All right, guys. Thanks for having me on the app. Yeah, Rowan, you feel... Yeah, I feel like an idiot. Let's play Sporkle. Let's play Sporkle. Robbie? I actually have to go do Spin and Pack Fist.

What time? 2.30? Yeah, can't lie. Prep. Can't lie. It was 2. Don't fib. All right.

If it was 2, you can... I feel bad that Jack and Big Ev are waiting for me. I'm having a blast. Oh, they're waiting? Yeah, just waiting for me. I'm having a blast. Oh, they're waiting? Yeah, just waiting on me. You're good to go. All right. Thanks, guys.

See you, Bob. Want me to get somebody for you or no? Kyle picks. Kyle's our booker. Who are we going to have to replace Roan? You are tight right now. I've never seen you like this before. This isn't the classic I don't give an F Roan that I are tight right now. I've never seen you like this before. This isn't the classic

I don't give an F Roan that I know and love. Have I ever said I don't give an F? That's kind of your shit. You've been earnest, yeah. You give an F and you admit it that you do. Yeah, I care. Whatever. Can't put toothpaste back in the tube. Facts. Toothpaste is fucking everywhere

now. Right. Slipping and sliding on the toothpaste. Yeahacts. Toothpaste is fucking everywhere now. Right. Slipping and sliding on the toothpaste. Yeah, we gave everything, too. We gave it all. No one knows who's presenting. No one knows any nominees. The categories. Come on.

Maybe now the fans can vote. Now more people will be talking about it. That's all I was trying to do. Get some conversation going about this. You're on a talk show every single day. They go two hours of talking. It's material.

You were doing your job, man. I did try to stop you. You did. I always wanted to be the type guy. Sure. You're going to type? No, you've got to play. What are you talking about?

I don't want to type today. What? No, you've got to play. What are you talking about? I don't want to type today. No, no, no, no, no, no. You can't type. You want TJ to play?

I mean, I want TJ to play, but I want you to – you also have to play because you're like the – you have more wins than anybody. Booze is our typer. Oh, Booze is – yeah, you're typing. Can TJ play from in there? I think so. Does TJ have the answer key? Don't cheat.

As long as he doesn't fucking cheat. I won't cheat. Maybe we extend the olive branch to Blattman and have him play? No, I don't want to see Blattman. I'm in trouble. He was the one who yelled at you? Yeah. Did anyone else jump in? Did anyone else jump in? What, yell at you? Yeah. Did anyone else jump in?

Did anyone else jump in? What, yell at me? Yeah, like did anyone join in? It was a group chat of where he had sent it to. I just screenshotted it. I wasn't looking at the group chat. You deny it. So you didn't do it.

I didn't see that. Yeah, yeah. So I didn't do it. It wasn't me. Can't be moved. Have you ever been close to being fired? No. But I care about doing the wrong thing.

It's not like I'm just flippant about it. Yeah. I think that will ultimately be for the best. What will? This incident. We'll get people talking about it. Yeah, true, true, true. Are we going for a live stream of it?

I don't know. I don't know anything about it. I'm going to go ahead and shut the fuck up about that. And talk about Sporkle. Yeah. I was hoping to order some food. I was hoping to order some pate. Let's order some pate.

I've never had pate. How much do you think the founder of Sporkle is worth? You think more than $5 million? No, not more than $5 million. Not more than $5 million. Does Sporkle have a merch store? I don't know. Matt Ram?

Matt Ram. Matt Ram. Thinking of Jon Rahm. Sash, you're yawning today. I'm tired. How late did you stay last night? Burning the late. Yeah? Yeah.

When was your last show? Were you on the 12 o'clock? No. There was no 12 o'clock. Fuck. I'm an idiot. On the Friday and Saturday. Were you gaming?

No. Were you listening to Drizzy? Listening to Drake. I've been listening to a lot of Chopin. Chopin? What type of shit is he singing? He's not singing. He's composing.

Yeah? What does the music make you feel? I don't think of anything. That's got to be nice as hell. I'm trying to achieve that. I just can't. You can't not have any thoughts? I can't not think.

Even when I try to... I'm either asleep or half asleep or thinking hard. You should read. That's not really in your... It's not your own thoughts. And your brain's... I guess. Forced to think about imagery, I guess.

Yeah, I need something. Sass, did you get Rona book? Yeah, I did. Did he appreciate it? I don't think so. Yeah. That was your big thing. He was pissed that I didn't appreciate it.

But that's quid pro quo, though. Truth. You've been not appreciating everything that I've given to you. It's only right that I didn't appreciate it. What the hell does that mean? It means he fucking made you and you're not even... I'm talking about the material gifts that I've given to you. I appreciated all of them.

I saw the book was bad. The book was a bad gift recipient. You were a bad boy. And with the fucking Detroit sweater. You've gotten me three things and they've all been stuff that you got in like Hudson News at the airport. It's a nice gift. I think that's nice. That's thoughtful. I thought about you. You got the reaction. That's a nice gift. I think that's nice. That's thoughtful.

I thought about you. You got the reaction. That's the exact reaction that you wanted from me. I don't want any reaction from you. I don't put the onus on you to react in a certain way. It was like a workshop book, like self-help. It's like an unfuck-your-fuck type of book. From the prep sheet, it says,

Jersey Jerry says, Sex may be overrated, but football is not. What do you guys prefer, sex or football season? Football season. Not even... Sex or football... One of those things I come. Yeah.

The other, not so much. The other, sex. I don't know. It's probably... Sex. Yeah, probably sex. Probably. You guys doing any shows for football season?

Better be in the sports office. No, I'm just going to try to follow it. Football? Yeah. You're going to be doing the fucking live streams. I know it. I don't know about that. You better be at the fucking live streams.

I like names. I like stats. Who's your squad this year? Who's your football team? I think I'm back on the Jets. That's my team. That's been my team. I gave up on them, but I'll give them four weeks.

You made a really good point about why would people watch bad teams. You don't listen to a band if they're bad. Even if it's my hometown band if they suck i'm not gonna go to their concert yeah i think it's because like then you hope that one day they'll be really good and then you can be like i was a fan the whole time but if you hate all the players and the players are trash and they don't bring you enjoyment are you actually a fan don Don't come at Frank. I kind of want to know about Tyler's last night.

Tyler went to the box with the crew. With your team. I don't know if they want to talk about it or not. You didn't give me any details. You said you saw an asshole stretch to its bliss. I saw a man's the absolute limits

of a man's asshole like I've never heard of this place. What is the crowd reaction when this shit happens? Yuck! Ew! No, it's more gasps.

But is there any What do they like to see? I imagine a lot of people just like sitting around in silence like really focused. Drinking like a scotch. Is there like club music playing? It starts at 1am.

Doors open at midnight. Do you have to get tickets? You have to get like a table. Okay. And yeah it's I went and this woman came out and just like stapled caution tape to her naked body, started bleeding.

Okay. Put a gun in herself and then started squirting people. That rules. And then a guy, I saw him like come out. It was a man with breasts. Okay. Or a woman with a dick. And he's like had his soft dick stretched.

It was like a taffy pool. So it's like torture porn. Yeah. Why would you pay to go see it? Yeah, right. Handsomely, too. I'd rather just watch him tease it. You have to be friends with somebody who has a million dollars. You could probably go sit in the balcony,

but not like a rich person thing. You wouldn't get any dick blood on you. Wait, did you guys see the people, the protesters at the golf course? No. What type of shit were they on? The Hamptons. Oh, what was it? They actually had some creative shit going. They're protesters?

Yeah. Have you seen the people that are protesting with the orange paint? And it's like... Oh, hell yeah! That was terrible! That was the worst thing I've ever seen! You pay a million dollars to hit it like that? Are you kidding me?

You got to be kind of rich to even get to the hand. So these people are like they didn't take the fucking public transit out there. What is the point of this? I think like environmentally or whatever. Those golf courses are against golf water. Yeah. We need cleaner. We need cleaner.

People all suck so much. We desire a future too. I hate all of them. I hate all of them. I hate all of them. That guy in the orca thought he was doing something. Wow. I can't believe them. Well, I think that's the push that the Congress needed to tax the rich.

We heard your jingle when we've decided to make a change. Tax the rich. Tax the motherfucking rich. We heard your jingle when we decided to make a change. Tax the rich. Tax the motherfucking rich. Yeah, there's no, like, right, what's the best move you can make? Not that. As a golfer in that situation. Tee off at them the way that they did in Jackass. You would have to do that.

Come back tomorrow. Yeah. Unlimited money. It's like being in the front row and someone doing crowd work. You just gotta be like, alright, yeah. But you're just not gonna be unfazed. You're gonna be phased. But you can keep that to yourself.

Instead of getting in their face and like, what the fuck are you gonna do? And you just walk on that easily. I'm sure when there's a swarm of them That guy with the forearm tattoos playing. He's probably not that rich. The guy with the forearm tattoos. The older guy with forearm tattoos.

He looked like a blue collar guy who worked his entire life just to be able to have a fucking Sunday off. To get a crack at playing golf at a nice place like that. What do you think the 14 year old boy working at the front desk thinks when he sees the guy getting out of his car in an orca costume? Those guys always think they're killing it. Yeah. He deserves a future too. Just some child who gives people like diet cokes

and Snickers bars. Yeah. Like fuck. Yeah. Some 16 year old girl like running the bar cart She's like you guys are richer than me You leave me alone The old man security guard

The friendly old security guard The greens keepers Who all make like $5 an hour If you have a problem with Mexicans Then who's going to keep the greens Have you thought about that Who's going to keep the greens? Have you thought about that? Who's going to keep the greens fresh? Oh, man.

That's so funny. Protesting like that. Protesting. It's just hot outside, so people all over the world are protesting climate change by being in France and sitting in front of like a blue collar workers car on the way to work. Yeah. But in France they drag you out of the road though.

They'll just run you over. They'll pull you by like your hair. TJ can you find the one that was spraying orange paint? That thing looked so much fun. I've seen that. I think she rigged a fire extinguisher

but with orange paint. Looked like the kids choice awards. One guy cemented his hand to the ground, and then a firefighter was trying to chip it off, and he was like, Ow! Quit it! They used epoxy mixed with cement,

and those guys are losing their fingers now. Yeah, yeah. People might have to have arms amputated. I don't think that's the one I saw, but what is she doing? She's out of paint. She's going bucket. She very poorly

anticipated how much paint was in that can. She was like, yeah, one can's definitely enough, right? On the glass? Yeah, this one looks awesome. Oh, I want that. I want it so bad. Yeah, that's awesome. I saw that. What is that doing

though? What are you doing when you're doing this? The orange paint is, I guess, fucking up the building. Covering the building. Yeah, but what is she getting out of doing this? Now a minimum wage worker has to do that. Definitely. The dude who's in the middle of cleaning the toilets. They're like, you got another job for you after that?

Yeah, you're going to work late today. Hey, we need you to skip dinner. They did that to the Waltons yacht recently, and it's just like the yacht crew has to do it. They're not sending the CEO of this company out there to clean the windows. It's an anti-oil protest. The sea suite's going to be clean.

What are the odds this is oil-based paint? A lot. High. Or oil-based clothing. You're not helping anything. That's so fucking preposterous. Yeah, that is hilarious. What, yeah,

do you think they think that they're, like, sending out, like, wherever they are, they're sending out some fucking oil god out there to fucking clean the windows?

Tycoon. Yeah. They gave it to him. Who's worth $20 billion gonna go out there on his hands and knees? Who's the woman from the Walton family? the windows. Tycoon. They gave it to him. Dude is worth 20 billion dollars gonna go out there on his hands and knees. Who's the woman from the Walton family?

She married Stan Kroenke. I don't know but they were spraying down her yacht like the back of it with like red paint or something like that. When they told her about it

if they even did she definitely didn't even like stop chewing the child embryo she was eating. She didn't blink. She was just good to go. Like, I don't give a fuck.

Doing a keg stand on the yacht with an adrenochrome. Yeah. Chug, chug. She just comes back like a teenager. Whoa. You see that one dude, that rich guy who's spending all his money on looking younger? I feel like I've heard about this. Oh, he's trying to reverse his aging, isn't he?

Something like that. Trying to get his internal age down or some shit? He's doing some shit with his son. Oh, what's he doing with his son? He might be drinking his son's blood. Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I did see that.

And his grandfather was drinking his blood too or something? Yeah, he's getting clowned, but I'm about it. If you're going to be rich, I think that's something wise to spend your money on. If you're that rich, why would you want to die? Exactly. Yeah. Doing everything he can to fund, like, longevity studies and shit. He's a weirdo.

If you're living in a slum, like, yeah, you're not gonna do the holistic stuff. Because why would you want to live? Jesus. Slums are probably fucking... The happiness of somebody who actually lives in a slum is probably way higher than a dude who was born into wealth and has

no job. Oh my god. He's done it. He didn't even look at me. I just had to fucking... has no job. Oh my God. He's done it. Didn't even look at me. Look at that strut. I just had to fucking what part of don't you understand? They have to have an emergency meeting now.

Oh, he's running. Oh God damn it. They're running around. I haven't seen this fucking frenzy to response. Look at what you caused. Yeah, they had to scramble the jetsets, dude.

Since Sass got on the phone and yelled Mayday. Dave's flying in from the Hamptons right now. He did what? God damn it. Gaz is whispering in his ear as Dave's reading a book to a classroom. Roan just said that. Roan just spoiled the 20th anniversary party. Sneaky athletic.

We got to do something about the sneaky athletic. Sneaky talented moment. Sneaky athletic. We got to do something about the sneaky athletic. Sneaky talented has been spoiled. Repeated. The most random hire is over. That was random. Random. What the fuck have I done? What's your speech like if you win that?

Or should we stop talking? I don't care. I don't know. I do care, but... I don't know what the speech would be. Thanks? I guess. When I got the call, I was like, why me?

Yeah. That's what they said. We all collectively as a company agreed that you're the one that didn't make any sense. We still don't get it. I would suck. Yeah, not when you win. Put that bitch on your fucking mantelpiece next to your future Emmy. Oh, yeah.

That's what I see. I start using that as my credits. Sass is going to go on stage. Brought up onto the silver screen. I'm telling you that. Made for movies. You remember is going to go on stage. I'm going to get brought up onto the silver screen. I'm telling you that. Made for movies. You remember him from Most Random Hire. It's Bill Sass.

You've seen him on Most Random Hire at the Barstool 20th Anniversary. Performs all around New York City. Woo! Good shit guys Good fucking shit When's the pate getting here Barstool Carl tweets asking people's opinions On handjobs Sound off

Says Stephen Che Alright guys let's get down to it Handjobs love them or hate them Go around the room Why don't you kick us off with this one I give him four fingers out of five Ron Bow bow bow bow bow bow

Sound off You gotta stop Oh no He's with Pete now I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Oh, look at him.

You made him laugh. Yeah, he's smiling. Oh, we good. I think he just likes to get mad. I think he likes to. I mean, when people are in positions of authority. It's fun. The thing that affirms who they are is being able to exercise that authority. Precisely.

Feel more like themselves when they're exercising authority. So you'll see people overreach their authority or use it in ways that don't require the hard use of authority, but it's really just an affirmation. I've never seen him actually get mad. He got mad at us

when we put out that swastika sketch for Out of Order and we sent him the episode, and he just replied, Hey, you. Yikes, guys. Is Hey, you the 14-year-old boy? Hey, buddy. I mean, that's got to be most rant-higher.

Come get your award, boy. He's got X's on his hands. Yeah, yeah, has to be. Just waters on stage, hair all messed up. I was supposed to be here. Pretty much my parents said I had to work at an ice cream shop

or I could work here. Is that what he said? I guess I chose this one. Yeah. I said this one, so I guess this is fine. I was going to work as four guys landscaping or here.

Now we're spoiling this TikTok video too? Oh, yeah, we are. We're assholes. That was a banger. That was Big TD. That was an incredible throw by Big TD.

That's just a little preview of what you're going to be getting in the future of the New York office. A lot of shit like that. Well, Diego just had the ball hit him in the face.

Damn. Now that shit's funny. Now that shit's fucking hilarious. I can't wait for my fucking pate later. Tax the rich. Tax the fucking rich. At least they were catching it. And they were very,

like they were in unison. It was good. It wasn't really all over the place. They all went to theater school. Yeah, true. You may remember him from the Montauk protests. Lil Sass. Racist, sexist, anti-gay.

Racist, sexist, anti-gay. Wait a minute. Wait. That was the Trump one, yeah. What the the... He said sex is anti-gay. No, sir. Wait a minute. Wait. That was the Trump one, yeah. What the fuck was that one? No KKK. No, sir. The fascist USA?

Yeah. Motherfuckers don't even know what fascism is, dude. That's just a juicy-ass thing to say. Facts. People would open their fucking ears. They would understand that's actually a pretty smart idea. With the sunglasses on. You need to find a car and get a selfie of yourself.

Make that your profile pic. They would learn that fascism is actually pretty fucking smart. And here's the science that backs it up. Why don't you go try to buy a box of cereal in Cuba? Why don't you try to go get some fucking cereal in Cuba? I mean, I did go to a grocery store in Cuba, and it was all mustard. It was 18 aisles of mustard, dude. Big-ass containers.

And that's like Cuban sandwiches in Cuba are mustard, bologna, and like a Hawaiian roll. And they just like serve them up by the thousands. I don't know what type of government they're running over in Iceland, but I know that the liquor stores were like inside of police stations. Yeah. Seriously. It would be like when you go into like a Walmart and there's a subway inside. And instead of liquor, it was canned fish. No, I've never been up there, bro.

Did y'all see whales while you were up there? Yeah. You did? I did. That's my dream to see a whale in the wild. That was cool.

What kind of whales? I don't know. It was just a pack of them right off the shore. What? Yeah. You were just like, you just glanced out

and you're like, oh, there's whales right there. You didn't even go looking for whales? Holy shit, was that a whale? Then we saw another one and we were like, oh my god.

I want to see a shark in the wild. Like from like a, like I don't know, is it like shark watching? I want to see like a great white. You know those old

Shark Week videos where they would have that fake seal when the sharks would fly out of the water? I want to see that. That would be fucking awesome. I'd be scared, dude.

I would never go there. One whale would do it for me. One whale I would, I love experiencing wonder. But even like, dude, I would never do it. One whale would do it for me. One whale, I would. I love experiencing wonder. But even, like, dude, like, blue whales, like, that shit's too big. It's too scary. They're too big. I would just tip the boat over. When I went

whale watching, we, like, passed some shark boats where, like, people are lowered. It's not like a full tank where you're just completely submerged. You're on the side of the boat, and they lower it so you can, like can even pop your head above the water if you want. And they said people as young as three and up to like a hundred

years old have done it and they just throw dead fish in the water. But like you don't, like we were there for 20 minutes we didn't see any sharks and it's just a thousand seagulls just eating all the food that they're throwing out there. I wouldn't want to do that. I wouldn't want to get in the water.

I would want to be fully submerged in the cage that's just on a string. That's on Nick's thigh, flesh, penis. Suspended. Lest we forget. Lest we forget his beautiful thigh, flesh, penis. No fascist USA. Tax the rich.

Tax the fucking rich. Tax the rich. Tax the fucking rich. Tax the rich. Tax the fucking rich. We was taxing the rich. There's a real son of a bitch. AB's got rectal itch. Do you right now? I had it immediately before this show.

I'm fine. Clearing up. Yeah, you got cream? Paracura. Yeah. Big shout out. Coon Rapids, Minnesota. That's where it's from?

Yep. My buddy had a butt cream company, and then they started specializing in skin cream, and one was in the red container and one was in the blue container, but. It's like the Matrix. Yeah, you pick. Which future do you want to lead? But it was the same cream in both.

They just would package it and label it for different things. But the red container and the blue container had the same cream. Same shit? Same formula? Same exact cream. Not even just same formula. It was coming out had the same cream. Same shit? Same formula? Same exact cream. Not even just same formula. It was coming out of the same patch. It's not that weird. Ass skin is just skin, man. Yeah. Not just regular old non-

stinky skin. From the day I was born, I was watching that porn. You sold your soul at the crossroads, man. I did. To be able to sing funky like Mr. Sparky. Mr. Sparkles. He blessed us with two genres that we had completely forgotten about.

Halloween and soul? Yeah. You don't hear that shit on the radio. You don't see that shit on the radio. You don't see that in the TikTok algo. That's definitely how his ass is fucking farting in that fucking... Is he going to shit right now? Is he going to shit right now? Of course he is, bro.

I would never hold it. Yeah, you would. Like 20 minutes. What's the closest you ever came to shitting yourself? I have shit myself. Because you hold it so hard? Kung fu class. I got sick.

Damn. Yeah. Belt were you brown? I'm kidding. I'm kidding. It was kung fu, so we were on the sash system. Like a Girl Scout? I was testing for green to blue.

For green to blue. And you did it on test day? Yeah. Damn. Nerves. Well, no, I was just sick. Did they still pass you? Right at the end, my dad made me ride home in the trunk.

Yeah. Damn, he put you in the fucking... On it? Or no, what's the trunk in the... Boot. Boot? He put you in the fucking On it Or no, what's that trunk in the Boot He put you in the boot Yeah Kung fu pants though Shit can't seep out

Cause it's like Yeah, tight at the It's the perfect pant to shit Yeah, it is Damn, that's probably why Where'd you go to kung fu? Right above the The dry cleaners

Elm Grove? No it was next to Hardee's They love to put a karate studio On top of a dry cleaners or a pizza shop This was a dry cleaners It was also a gymnastics studio Tony Zervas Tony

What's up Mr. Shit? He pissed. He just pissed. I thought about shitting and then I said, nah. Boys are probably saying something nasty about me. I gotta go control those sons of bitches. Keep us in line. Gotta go put those boys in line.

Really went off the rails without you. Roan read more categories. New ones that they just sent. I have a fucking joke about that. Sneakiest, most talented. Most talented sneaky. Do you think they have any unsneaky categories? Roan won all the low-key categories.

Why? Roan won low-key funniest, low-key smartest. Low-key unathletic. That's good, Roan won all the low-key categories. Why? Roan won low-key funniest, low-key smartest. Low-key unathletic. That's good, Roan. Thank you, bro. Congrats. No, that means a lot. I'm happy for you.

Yeah, right, you sardonic bastard. Don't even hit me with that sardonic. What the shit, dude? No, you're sardonic, bro, and I've had enough of you. I know you're in a little bit of a rut right now after the whole Latin fiasco. I'm going to funk. Nothing a little drizzy can't take care of. I know you're in a little bit of a rut right now after the whole Blackburn fiasco. I'm going to funk. Nothing a little Jersey can't take care of. I know.

Funny one. I'm going to DM him right now. Hey man, Rough Day, can you cheer me up? I bet you he'd send you a gif. He'd probably send him a gif of himself. Him standing up clapping. Yeah. At the Raptors game

that was against the Sixers. Whoa. He was really talking a lot of shit that game, man. I remember it like it was fucking yesterday. Who you going to the show with? What do you think about

Joel Embiid on the podcast being like, I want to win if it's on the Sixers or not? I think he was just talking shit. Yeah. I'm not that worried about that.

No, no. Come on, bro. Don't wish. What about the football player? Come to my Pacers, man. Come on. You and I'm not that worried about that. No, no. Come on, bro. Don't wish. What about the football player? Well, come to my Pacers, man. Come on. You and Tyrese? That would be crazy.

I like him. Who? Halliburton. He's on the cover of Slam. That duo would be dangerous. Yeah. Dangerous. That's what I'm worried about.

You know we could have got Halliburton for Simmons. I kind of wanted it at the time. And then we'd still have Halliburton instead of... You guys hate Simmons. Yeah. So that football player... Never understand why. What is his name? What is his name? Gardner?

Chauncey Gardner Johnson? Who said, you guys are all assholes, worst people. Yeah, because people are being so mean to him. I see what the people say. Did he punch a guy in the face on the field? Maybe not when he was on the Eagles. Is he the guy?

Oh, Denzel Mims punched him. Okay. Or no, was it Denzel Mims? Some receiver for the Bears tried to rip his chain and then punched him. Mims is on the Jets. Right. Denzel Mims is going to get someone else. Maybe Marvin?

No, no. Marvin Mims? They tried to kill my wife. Mims, this is why I'm hot They tried to kill my This is why I'm hot Whoa you just Denzel Mims Yeah that's unprecedented Remember Mims

This is why I'm hot Remember that This is why I'm hot Remember that This is why This is why This is why I'm hot Remember that

Hot cause I'm fly You ain't cause you not I know this This is why This is Mims I'm hot because I'm fly. You ain't because you're not. I know this song. This is Mims. That's Mims, bro. Who sang Just a Touch of Love? Laffy Taffy. Oh.

Laffy Taffy. Andy, girl. You know that these two might truly start a show together? They should. Why not? I asked if I could be, because I had suggested it. They said that they might do it.

I said, can I be executive producer if you do? And they said, yes, but Nick is too. I already shot up. Really? Yeah.

Whatever. You could have unlimited EPs. Mad Dog will be in Chicago, so I'll be executive producing Mad Dog, you have Gia. Okay. I like that.

I want him to do a morning show. Yeah, but like with a U in it, so like whenever someone famous dies. Yes, we have back here. All right. Look at him yucking it up. It's probably something hilarious.

He's laughing. Quigs recommended that I super follow Meek Phil, and it's just me and Quigs paying $3 a month for some exclusive Meek Phil tweets. Does he give you much exclusive shit or is it dried up like... You can't talk about it. True. What else?

It's fucked up if I give away the exclusive content. It's his cock. Oh God. God bless America. God bless America. God bless us, everyone. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. I jake the snake-em. Mm-hmm. EDT-em and mausoleums. Who said that? Sound like a battle rapper. Run the jewels. Oh, they did?

The jewels live at the garden. They're low- a battle rapper. Run the jewels? Oh, they did? The jewels live at the garden. They're low-key battle rappers. Killer Mike said he can't do too much weed, though, because his schizophrenia runs in his family. Oh, that's actually scary. That is terrifying. Low-key. Stopping weed is gnarly, kind of.

It's kind of like its own high in itself. Totally. It's crazy. It happened to my buddy. I know. schizophrenia. A whole weed. Yeah.

Buddies have done it all, man. Yeah. I was telling you about that last night. Yeah. I'm not going to talk about that, though. I wouldn't talk about that. That's true sensitive information. Yeah.

But riding a bike is so fucking fun still. Like, I haven't rode a boat in three weeks. Like, I just got cancer. You've been riding city bike? So, like, a dickhead. I'm too afraid. I finally got past it. Did you just say that you've been riding a bike like you just got cancer?

Yeah, that's how I ride my bike. I've been, like, weaving through cars. It is awesome. I do it every day. It's, like, the most freeing thing in the world when you finally let go of that those nerves and just go for it. Yes. Go the wrong way on the bike lane. Yeah, you just can't care.

Sometimes people will yell at you and they're always a white person. It's never like Oh, no. Hey, guy. Bike lane. Wrong way, buddy. Left. Left. On your left. Bike bells should be more intimidating, buddy. Left. Left. On your left. Bike bells should be more intimidating, though.

If you're about to wreck into somebody and it's just like, tring, tring. Yeah, that should be fun. Uber Eats guys have like a buzzer. Oh, okay. Wah! They definitely have that shit. You should be able to customize it. That was like the beginning of What's New Pussycat.

Wah, wah, wah! That would be a great bike. And some of the dudes some of the delivery guys have definitely seen some shit because they're wearing full motorcycle helmets on a bicycle yeah they've seen guts yeah bro there's a rat yeah this guy's borderline i don't even use that green bike lane anymore. I'm just on the street. Very good. It's the bike lane, you dumb shit. All right. I fucked with this. This guy has a billion of this video.

Guy! Dude, you can't do this. It's going to happen every time. He's going to live with it. He finds himself getting frustrated by everyone. It's not going to a one ride bike lane I want this guy to get this guy's hope beaten out of it. He wants like the city to This is Lin Manuel Miranda. Yeah, this works dude ever

Hey, buddy Wrong way busted condom Wrong way Fucking condom But dude he always Is ISU so mad Exclusively is around like 34th street The most touristy area That's not even bad what I'm seeing

I got yelled at for driving in the wrong way Show me more of this He's doing that just for that Because you can't stay You'll have to be like, fuck you, pussy, like, every now and again. That's just me singing 21 Savage lyrics. Off the phone. I kind of like that one.

Off the bike lane. He's, like, speeding up towards them so he could say something. Like running over an old lady. John Leguizamo-ass character. He's not even in a bike lane. He's on the fucking street. He slapped that car. My uncle used to

slap cars on bikes. One time he had to like go to my grandmom's house and like hide in the bushes because they like chased him down after he like slapped

the hood in the car. The best is the one where have you seen the video of the dudes that are driving and they like, I guess they get like cut off by a biker and then

they pull up next to him and they just throw, they just push him. Have you seen that one? No. Dudes in the car.

It's funny as hell. I think I've seen that. I think I have it saved. People in car lanes do hate bikers, though. Deserved. But not now. Share the road! That's like a fucking giraffe getting mad at the bird that lives on his neck.

Like, you shouldn't even be fucking in the, you shouldn't be paying attention. Share the road, you fucking condom! Nice job, busted condom! I was like, he probably wrote for the first time for those videos. He's like, this is gonna kill. Not for the first time. Every video, he's using some, like, very specifically chosen, off-the-beaten-path insult. Because he just ran out of cocksuckers and motherfuckers.

Condom doesn't work. It just doesn't. It's just not a word that can be used as an insult. Good job, busted condom! Busted condom. Busted sounds like the condom got arrested. Yeah. Like in GTA. Busted condom. Busted.

Wasted. Wasted. Wasted condom. Wasted. Wasted. Wasted condom. Holy shit, did you guys see that Antonio Brown wants next on Adam 22's girl? Oh my god, the saga continues. This can't be real. Bro, Adam 22 is literally not a real person. Can't find this goddamn video.

Whatever. Who gives a fuck anyway? I care, I care, bro. Who gives a goddamn anyway? Nothing matters. Nothing fucking matters. Nothing else matters. So be careful what you say. The cranberries? Metallica.

That did not sound like Metallica. Cranberries? Metallica. That did not sound like Metallica. Cranberries covering Metallica. I'm like some Irish bitch. That sounds like Sinead. Sinead. I love me some Metallica. Sass, drop your top five nationalities of foreign bitches.

I'm going to get in trouble for this. I'll be on the couch tonight. Can't lie. Because you asked. Babe, Ron asked. What am I going to do? The whole show's doing it. This is my art.

I didn't mean Japanese pussy. It's a joke. Everyone knows I'm joking when I say I love Japanese pussy. Relax. Fuck off. Are you seriously mad about that? If you can't take it, don't watch. I told you not to watch my work anyway.

I'm playing a character. It's a bit. There's Howard Stern saying that to his wife after, like, some stripper sucks his dick. It's a character. Hey, come on, babe. It's a character, babe. Robin, what do you say this girl eats my dick? And he has a panel of special needs dudes watching. Yeah, with their micro-penises out.

Robin, bring in Stumpy Greg See if he can fuck this girl on a Sibian I was listening to that You had that in your bag I never tried it before You were listening to what? Howard religiously at 10 My dad got like the

Remember when they were on E? The satellite thing Oh he bought the satellite? That you'd stick to your windshield And I was enamored by that program. Yeah, it was dirty as hell. It was just like everybody was a construction worker driving into work, just being like, what the fuck?

It was incredible. He's throwing some hard rock. I'll go Brazil. I'll actually go Iran. Iran. South Korea. Don't play with these Iranians. Florida.

Something Mediterranean. What would it be? What would it be? Palestinian. Israel, maybe. Have you seen the new theater that they're throwing around? Like with the calling girls mid, they'll post a picture of, like, the most attractive girl in the world. And the caption will be, like, this was considered ugly in the 1960s.

Yeah. It was like, based off of what are you guys getting this information that in the 1960s everyone was hotter? I saw a guy that had Margot Robbie in. He was, like, put on a DVD that came out in 2005. Every girl looks like her. It's like no. Look up women from the 1960s. They all look like they're fucking 90 years old

and they're like 23. Also people will pull up a picture from the 1960s and be like look no body fat on any of these people. Like Grover Cleveland never got stuck in a bathtub. There weren't fat people. They pull up a picture from the Great Depression and they're like no phones, no obese people. Yeah.

No, they were in a fat pen. Yeah. The hottest women in 1960s were like Wilma Beth. Who the fuck is that? That was like their name. Yeah. Yeah. That's like a stunning photo.

Yeah, I'm coming. That's like an alien. Pull up top 10 of the 1960s. Who was the... Top 10 1960s bitches? Whores might be a better word to use for that. Yeah, maybe. Like the woman from the Dick Van Dyke show

who wore pants. It was like, this woman's a fucking pioneer. Most beautiful women of the 60s. Raquel Welch. Okay. All right. How old was she? Claudia's got lunch lady arm.

Let's keep it a buck. Yeah. It's got to be a Maryland drop-off coming up. She was stinky. Where's Jane Mansfield? All right. They're making some good points. Okay, so they're all bad?

Not bad, actually. Yeah. Ann Marber is a hilarious name. This is a little bit too late. Okay, Barbara. All right, go. It's Reba McIntyre. Bridget Bardot was actually down.

Bridget Bardot was smoking Town mode Bridget Bardot was Smoke And so was Audrey Hepburn I'm not Yeah I mean They're smoking hot Oh yeah we're fucking up We should be like

Margot Robbie is ugly as shit Yeah I mean she is mean as fuck Disgusting I'm gonna go beat off To breakfast at Tiffany's Damn Mickey Rooney

Great character in that one. Just kidding. I need to watch some more New York movies before I move to Chicago. Just kidding. Skidding. People are going to run with that. Skidding, skidding, skidding. I can't believe so many people sit at these fucking stupid ass cowboys.

When I was going to the bathroom, I'm like, why are people sit at these fucking stupid ass couches I was just gonna say that when I was going to the bathroom I'm like why are people sitting in the lobby now Yeah And people just chill there on like the shallow couches The shallowest couches of all time Yeah Shallow couch Stupid ass dumb ass couches

Let's see who that dude's stanced up He is wide set Look how wide that stance, boy. That was an old text caption. He took a wide ass stance picture and then the caption was, look how wide that stance, boy. I think of it all the time

when I see a stanced up man. Do you rank like handicapped women? Yeah. Don't let me blog. You blog like one of these lists of wheelchair girls. Which is objectively funny and bigoted to

not let that exist. One day my handicapped children will be judged by their hotness. Not by the fact that they're sitting in a wheelchair. Are you doing Handicapped Martin Luther King?

Yes. I got a dream to the tune of Handicapped. That's a remix. That's the motherfucking remix. We got a new talent booker. Did we? Yeah. A man added to the team. A new talent booker? Did we? Yeah. A man added to the team.

A new talent booker? I love that for like a security measure. We tinted the doors so we just let anybody in that knocks. Yeah. Like anybody with an Uber Eats bag couldn't fucking infiltrate here with like six Uzis in there. It could probably hold, yeah, probably around six Uzis. Yeah, if you stack them. About eight Dracos six Uzis

someone could just walk in with an Uzi and be like I'm here for the yak and they'd be like okay that makes sense oh I'm just gonna talk to Big Jack

yeah oh okay just wait in the lobby come get you and then the thing is we'd see that guy we'd be like does that guy have

a fucking Uzi get him in get him on the show what's up dude what's with the show. What's up, dude? What's with the Uzi? What's up, dude? Yeah, come in. Sit down.

Talk in the mic. All right, but you're going to be on the wet wheel now. You're going to be on the wet wheel. Oh, yeah, just sit anywhere. Anywhere. I'll get up. I'll get up. I got to go to the bathroom anyway.

This ass goes to the bathroom to avoid getting genocided What a fucking pussy Think about the stripper incident Often And how odd that was that people were so mad at me Sass wasn't even fucking hard Yeah People were like I could never even imagine

Turning down a free lap dance That's what they were saying. Yeah, and it was like, dude, it's noon on a Monday, and I'm on a live stream with my coworkers. It's not like we're at a strip club at 3 in the morning. And that video would just be used so often. Imagine if I just sat back. That would have been way worse. Fucking lay it on me.

Smack their ass and giggled it in your hand i was like oh fuck slow down yeah harder biting her ear yeah that's what people wanted like dudes i guess i understand that though it's kind of like when you're watching a movie and then like there's a sex scene and you're like i wish they showed more titties in that like if you're watching the yak and all of a sudden there's just like a hot ass stripper on the show you're probably but i'm never in the watching a movie being like why isn't he fucking her how i want yeah yeah it's true but it's like you ruined someone jerking off they're like i need to fucking

jerk off and bust to this. And your attitude. Instantly, they open up Twitter. I was just about to fucking bust. And then you flaked. You flaked on my bust. What the hell am I going to bust now? Have a better attitude, sass. You don't know how good you have it.

You just got handed pussy. You're 22 and got handed pussy Good shit They would've gotten lambasted if they had fucked And then you snuck out No one gave a shit about that Oh I got I got shit for it

Roan's a pussy Not the same level. People didn't say that. They definitely did. They were like, he's a smart pussy. I would have worked her. Weren't you here?

No, I was on a road trip. Oh, yeah. Watching live, and I kind of was. What the hell is going on in here? Dude, Mook's never done anything well. Never. This is what the office has turned into.

Yeah, like a 1910s. It's just fucking people playing games. Someone's going to go by with like a playpen. It's recess. The TikTok prompts are insane. I feel like a child. It came to me when we were in the elevator yesterday, and we were walking in, and I was like,

he hit the third floor button. I was like, why are you going to the third floor? He's like, because I don't want to have anyone ask me any TikTok questions. They ambush me as soon as I walk in. Today was fun. I got to draw a circle. Yeah, I did draw a circle, too. Yeah, I did draw a circle, too.

What the hell? Did you guys get your report card recently? We just got ours, and it was like they want us to post like over a thousand TikToks in a month. We had a meeting today. Like, you guys had it yesterday. No, we have one tomorrow. Oh. I'm not going to be here, though.

Thank God. I'll zoom in. What's up, brother? Hey. That's when they really... Cold cut salesman. Yeah. Yeah.

I'll get a call from five call at five from Roan. Yeah. A lot of people are mad at you. Are you not in tomorrow? No. You said you were going to be here. I asked you this earlier in the week. Yes.

Big cash last day, dude. I mean, what are we even doing? I mean, what the hell are we even doing here? Oh, that's probably another award we're giving out. What the fuck is going on, award? I mean... dot dot dot, award. I think if we spin the wheel, it's going to land on Carbone.

I do too. Can we just go right now? Yeah. Let's just assume it did. Did Drake ever rap about Carbone? He has to. Every hot spot in every major city. But he likes to rap

about like low key. Like he probably has rapped about the box a few times. I just said lick with the box. Yeah. Roddy Ricch, bro.

It's Roddy Ricch. I spin it. Why are they flaming Lil Baby? Because he didn't sell out. I guess he didn't sell a lot of tickets on his tour. And he had to cancel shows. I think they canceled the whole tour. What they're saying is music is trash.

Fell off. Really? I think Lil Baby's pretty good. Last table left at Carbone. Colin plays on the rotary phone. I take a glass of Dummy Non to go with me home. I thought you were just spitting off the dome. Damn, damn.

You could have played that off. Then last table left. I feel like they would pull up a table for Drake. You think that he's ever not gotten into Carbone? I think that's also a huge... There's that video where they're like, this is a bar that denied Drake one time. Right? I think that's a big thing. They can what's that, there's that video where they're like, this is a bar that denied Drake one time. Right?

Like, I think that's, like, a big thing. Really? They can be like, yeah, we're very exclusive. We didn't let Drake in. And they probably just let some, like, bleached hair, like, unemployed dude be in there with a good-ass jawline. Yeah. I see a lot of clubs, like, flaunting who they turn down. Whack. Like Elon Musk.

I guess he gets turned down by a lot of clubs. It makes sense. He probably kills the vibes pretty hard. Definitely. I mean, at a club, like, they're just

blasting music. All you have to do is, like, sit at your table. There's no way he kills the whole vibe of a club. I know. I've never been to a club. I wouldn't be able to let

loose around Musk. I would be tight as hell. Yeah. Yeah. What you're doing with Twitter is fucking phenomenal. You lied to him? Yeah. To, like, gain his approval?

Doge! The moon! Doge! That shit was hilarious. How do you come up with your tweets? You're my favorite meme provider. He is fucking undefeated. He curates them well.

He knows what's funny. He's a fucking genius. You guys record anus this week? Yeah. Is it out? Yeah. Let's fucking go. Go download that bitch.

Yep. You plugging anus right now, dude? Of course. Literally. Thanks. Been plugging anus since birth. Now? Of course. Literally. Thanks. Been plugging anus since birth. Now that shit's on the way out. Big football.

Big billy football. We're trying to cut down on the workload, so it's done. It's done? Yeah. I wonder who's next to get canceled in favor of electroconvulsive therapy on this third floor. Hey, we're cutting 25 positions. Sorry, anus has got to go. Gas has got to derma roll.

That's hilarious. Let's play a sport call. Do a round. Let's do a quick round. TJ, you're in, but we just know you're ethical. On a round. Do a quick round. TJ, you're in, but just be it. We just know you're ethical. Honor rule. I like this blue. You're right next to it. It's the fucking shade.

Read it off, Seth. Only MLB pitchers with 500 plus wins, two father slash son US president surnames are countries, four corner states, it's always sunny main characters six clue suspects seven classifications of living things eight standard crayola colors nine one word military

ranks ten countries to finish runner-up in the men's World Cup. Go ahead and start, Sassy. I'll go with Russia. Bush. Hey. TJ. Adams. TJ, go after you.

Romania. Hey. Florida. Hey. Oh! All right. Honorable man. But at what cost? Does that mean states that have four corners?

No, I think there's the four corner states. Like, there's an actual area of the country, right? Yeah. Swear, boys. Bye. I'll go with Dennis Reynolds. No. I'm going to have to do Dennis because there's three Reynolds.

D-E-N-N-I-S. Just sit back and enjoy, my brother. You can just scratch the Reynolds. D-E-N-N-I-S. Just sit back and enjoy it, my brother. Oh. You can just scratch the Reynolds. The Reynolds doesn't even need to be in there. Just do Dennis. D-E-N-N-I-S. New Mexico.

Mexico. D-E-E. Charlie. Mack. Professor Plum. Nice. Frank. Frank. Colonel Mustard.

Oh, but we're going to lose it on here. Ah. You're good. You're good. Okay. Oh, is it me? Yeah. Four corner states North Dakota

No I was just thinking squares It's like the third Arizona Utah Shit road Mr. Green It's like Arizona. Utah. Shit road. Mr. Green. Colorado.

Colorado. Clear. For what? No, no, no. Uh, uh... Uh, general. Sergeant. Just hit her with the old right clicky. Rwanda

I couldn't think of it Captain Private What's that last category? 10 countries to finish runner up in the Men's World Cup. Mrs. White. Finish runner-up? Yes.

Croatia. Shitrone. France. Good pull, Roan. France. Good pull, Nicky. England. Nope. Thought that would be a good guess. That one had me worried.

Adam Farron? Mr. Farron? The floor is yours. The floor is yours. Argentina. Argentina. Argentina. Red. You bastard. Oh, my God.

Blue. Violet. I'm out. Ooh. I'm out. Green. Shit. Winner, winner, chicken dinner. Mr. Farone takes home another win. I thought they would have Roy G. Bivved out of the original.

Mrs. Peacock, Miss Scarlet. Cy Young. Oh. Brown, orange, yellow, purple, black. Corporal, lieutenant major, specialist. Brazil, Czechoslovakia, Germany, Hungary, Italy, Netherlands, Sweden. I'll be. Better when I'm older.

I'll be The greatest Fan of your life Alright Sass You got shit to do man Yeah No But I'm down to call it You have shit to do

Yeah What do you gotta do I gotta get fitted Oh yeah yeah yeah Oh yeah Holy fuck You guys gotta end it Yeah let's end it

See you guys gotta end it Yeah let's end it See you guys tomorrow It's time to stock shop And do a Yankee pop It's the act It's the act