The Yak - The Boys are Finally Going to Le Bernardin | The Yak 2-22-23

Episode Date: February 22, 2023

He gets itYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Hello. This hat doesn't really work with the headphones. It does. It's the late Ben Ardende. Oh, shit. That's what this is for? Yeah.

I brought in fancy hats for the boys because we're going to lunch. It kind of works better with the headphones. You think so? Look at Jay. Steven, put your hat on. It's LeBan Ardente. I'm so excited to go spend... $3,000? On a mid-afternoon lunch?

Yeah. Who wouldn't want to do that? Oh, Jay, you look good too. Thanks. Wheel is just. Jay looks awesome. You do that? Oh, Che, you look good, too. Thanks. Wheel is just. Che looks awesome. You look awesome. You rock that.

Every version of Indiana Jones. Wow, I look way smarter with this. Well, smarter? I'm not saying I am smarter. I say I look smarter. Right. You're definitely not smarter. You're smart presenting. Also, is that

a sports coat? It almost has sweater tendencies. It's a sports coat. Yeah, I'm wearing a sweater underneath. What is happening? I understand that. The shirt, the coat itself looks sweater-like. She thought I was wearing a sweater.

Like a cardigan almost. Like cardigan material. That's one of the... Something about this look. Are you drunk? Something about it. Are you guys going to have some alcoholic beverages there? I think knowing one Adam Ferron, that will be pushed on us.

So yeah, I'm ready. I'm mentally prepared for buying the nicest bottle of white wine they have well there's there's i might splurge yeah there's options there's um so there's like a regular lunch but then there's the chef tasting and there's a chef tasting menu with wine pairing okay pull up the menu real quick i don't want to do that because then i have to wait the thing with the chef tasting is then you have to wait for your food. And this isn't content, right? No, so we can't pull up the menu?

No, I'm just saying that people will know where you are and you could get kissed. Oh, fuck. Because it isn't content. Look at this. Also, we have to be spending. Wow. Oh, this is nice. It's beautiful.

What's that have to do with a restaurant? A seafood. Lunch. I did look at it last night and there's something that Sass is going to be jealous of. Lobster roll? You guys are going to be sucking eggs right out of the can. How much is it? $55 lobster roll.

Lobster roll, guy? I love lobster rolls. I love lobster rolls. Yeah. Got a big lobster roll. Might buy an extra one for you, Sass, and throw it in the trash on the way home. That's nice. Oh, just a potato.

With wine pairing. Yeah. Boys are going to lunch. The people look at, what is that, caviar in a shell? Yeah, I don't know. They look at that and get hungry. What is it? I don't think I've ever had caviar.

It's like spicy, right? No, it's... It's fish eggs. Yeah, it's eggs. Salty, yeah, I don't... Is've ever had caviar. It's like spicy, right? No, it's salty. It's fish eggs. Salty. Yeah, it's eggs. Salty. Yeah, I don't. Is it fertilized fish eggs?

You guys have never had caviar? I have my first. I've actually never had caviar. And I don't think I've had it in Arizona. I don't think I'd like it. You've had caviar in Arizona? We went to one of these type restaurants. And when you're in a place like Arizona right by the ocean, you have to.

You've got to get the caviar in Arizona. I've had it like in the tea. But you're eating it above a tea. No, I'm kidding. Oh, yeah. I had one of those in this big chair I had in college. I had caviar in my chair. It was sick. I was just thinking anything that's like ball shaped is caviar in my chair. Sick.

Just thinking anything that's like ball-shaped is caviar. I like that. That is good. That's McDonald's caviar pits. Oh my God. Pass that caviar. Yeah, the one that you put the quarter in and you twist it and it rolls out.

Yeah, that's caviar. Caviar machine. So what's up, guys? We're one day post-Travis. I thought that was a great episode because there was people who absolutely loved it and people who absolutely hated it, and that's like the money spot.

It was impressive that it proved y'all's theories correct. Yes. To a T. I don't know what people expected. The whole point is Travis's aren't funny. The funniest Travis is not going to be too funny. It was two hours of vindication.

Bartleby wants to just be done with the competition right now and be like, there's no conclusion. How could there be? There can't be a funniest Travis. Just edge everyone. Never found them. I don't think they'd be mad because like.

I understand. I get it. The funniest Travis has to be kind of funny. Wait, you're saying our fans wouldn't be mad if we didn't finish our plans? I mean, it's not like we do it all the time. We've been, our den has been like six months. It's been close to a year, I think. 12 hour yak's coming up, boys.

Yeah, oh yeah. That is coming. The sleepover in Brandon's yard. Oh, that is for sure coming. That'll be fun. Doing the... Run to Iran. Yeah, we're doing the mall.

What was that, DJ? Ron going to Iran. Ron going to Iran. We're doing the mall. ML Cake. I gotta do a job search. ML Cake. Gotta do a job search.

I gotta do a photo shoot. Wedgie. Steven Chan. to do a job search. I've got to do a photo shoot. Wedgie. Steven Chan. I've got to do a Lambo ride. I have a draft, right? Didn't one of my things get picked for the draft? Yeah. We have so much on our plate.

The entire summer plan. So we mentioned the American Dream Mall. The people there were very nice. We were going to be around the water park area, right? Did you see what happened there I think two days ago? Yes. So my kids, I said yesterday they were going to go to American Dream and they texted me

and said the helicopter fell. The helicopter fell. What? On top of people. Can we find a picture? In the water pool. In the ceiling. A decorative helicopter. Maybe it was part of a ride.

I think it was like you went up in it. It was probably part of like... Fell. Made of foam? No. So it killed people? I don't know if it killed. I don't think it killed, but it maimed.

Imagine being underwater at a water park and just a helicopter falls on top of you. Honestly, swear to God, that would be the last thing I expect. Not even joking. Yeah, that thing fell into the water. Oh, it's right on top of the slide. Yes, it fell right on top of two people who had just come out of the slide, apparently. They're okay. It's the best day ever.

Surely a helicopter can't fall on top of me here. Thank God we're inside. I have an irrational fear of helicopters. Finally, a water park indoors. A helicopter. That's actually not a bad deal because those people are going to be rich. That's so true.

If they're not dead. I don't understand. What could it be made out of to not instantly kill somebody with that size and that high of a fall? Maybe the water had to have been just hit the water. Maybe it didn't directly.

Do we have a video? I doubt it. I saw a video of the aftermath of my TikTok algorithm. It's all like horrible things that can happen. And it's like the lifeguard.

Like everybody's running in like lifting the helicopter. Oh, we got to see that. I don't know. I want to watch it. It was on my TikTok. I don't know how to find it. Also, the water

in a lot of those water parks at the pool area is only like four feet deep. So. Wait, where's that? What is that? The cameraman could have gotten closer. There's the helicopter.

It's big. Yes, it's huge. And it fell. You'd think they'd really make sure that was really screwed on up there. If no one's dead, that is objectively hilarious. Yeah. Because there are going to be children who are, for the rest of their life, they're going really screwed on up there. If no one's dead, that is objectively hilarious. Yeah. Because, like, there are going to be children

who are, like, for the rest of their life, they're going to be like, is a helicopter going to fall? I think we're going to be afraid. I think we're going to drop it on us. They can't go inside or outside. I know, dude.

They're like, oh, we might get rain, so let's go to the indoor water park. Never actually been in, like, a plane crash or anything like that, but I had a helicopter fall on me once. I've been in an air accident. Yeah, it would be funny to just explain it. Yeah, you know when that plane crash happened?

Not really me, but this water park. I land on top of me. You got wedged not die again if someone died then we'll just pretend we never said anything what are you doing brandon oh i had to um i had to pick my nose so i was covering my face up she just never stopped you before dude who cares i just felt like i had a boogie so i was trying to cover my face up you're trying to be like a hot guy now that you pulled off the medium t because that's the triple xl i asked him on the way in this is wearing it right now swimming in it watch out for a chopper it's too big on me isn't it

it's way too big on you where's rome yeah what the fuck um i have to shout out Ebony's OnlyFans. Oh, okay. Yeah, that makes sense. I get emotional commission from it. So I guess the first time I did it, she made a lot of money. She's been very nice to me. I can get five more right now. She posts every day, pretty much.

She secured D's. She showed me on her phone. I didn't ask. Real shiny ass on her.'t ask. Real shiny ass on her. Very shiny. Real shiny ass. Wait, what's her username? Secura Deez. Like her Twitter, I think.

D-E-E-Z. Secura Deez. Hold on. Zah. The way you were nodding there. Yes, big cat. You subscribe? Not anymore.

Don't undersell it. I am aware of what's going on back there and trust me, you want to know what's going on. Did you see her shiny ass? Oh, I did. I saw a whole lot more. Dude, I saw your reflection filming it. In the ass. Stop that.

No, it's not like a fun house. Oh, man. Okay, so security Securides. She's been so nice to me. Since she made it and I first shot it, she's been so nice to me. spell it out Ever since I first shot it Since she made it And I first shot it She's been so nice to me

I want some of this Niceness Actually she's very nice to me too Roan's had a pop punk shoot going on Again Oh man These pop punk shoots Want to get Titus in that shoot?

Yeah we could have Titus come in Yeah Means that Roan's gonna Be going to the Restaurant and like make up I didn't even realize he was make upped up Right $30 per month's a lot Joan's going to be going to the restaurant in makeup. I didn't even realize he was makeuped up. $30 per month's a lot.

Yeah. Right up. By the way. Oh. Oh. Oh. Damn. That's the same as our Instagram story. Same captions.

For a second there, I was like, why is she selling yak shirts on her own? It looks like it. It looks like it. Team player. team player. Team player. By the way, just while Steven's out, Kyle Rudolph told me nothing. Yeah. It's going to bother him.

It's gotten to him quickly, yeah. He tried to one-up me. And I love that you're even saying this now to throw him off the trail. Yeah, right. Exactly. Wink. There he is, Mark Titus. Come on in.

We're not going to hurt you. Okay. Come on in. Come on in, big boy. Hey, wink. There he is, Mark Titus. Come on in. We're not going to hurt you. Okay. Come on in. Come on in, big boy. Hey, buddy. They're right there in that seat. Taking his time. Yeah.

Why are you intimidated by the yak? Yak never hurt anyone. I just feel like I'm walking into a trap somehow. I don't know. All I'll say is this. If Roan walks in here, you have to challenge him to a rap battle immediately and say that you're way better than him. He loves when people do that.

Roan's had his battle this Saturday, and he did the whole thing for me, Tyler, and Mook when we finished recording yesterday, and it's fucking insane. Is it? Yeah, it's so funny. I was like in tears laughing. I heard good things. Yeah. It's going to a good cause, so everyone can expect it.

Yes, it is. Mark, Indiana, Mr. Basketball, 2002. Oh, here we go. 2002 was, all right. 2002, I believe, one was Sean May. You wouldn't know. Why?

I could have said anything. Yeah, you could have. I could have said anything. You wouldn't know. Why? You could have said anything. Yeah, you could have. You could have said anything. You never know. Oh, he got it. Good shit. There we go. You never know with KB

because if he, like the minute you announced you were hired, he probably was like, I'm going to learn everything. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

What's the best basketball, high school basketball gym? in uh yeah you guys were talking about this not too long ago yeah i was watching they rule that was yeah um i mean newcastle's the big one it's the one that uh i was talking i was talking to brandon last night about uh blue chips was filmed in frankfurt high school in indiana um the hot dogs is their mascot didn't tell me that part you weren't listening brandon because you were talking the whole in Indiana. The Hot Dogs is their mascot. I like that a lot. You didn't tell me that part. You weren't listening, Brandon, because you were talking the whole time

at dinner. You wouldn't shut up. Brandon, are you addicted to dinners? I love dinners. I feel like you've been having a lot of dinners. I like dinners. But a lot of them. I'll tell you what this son of a bitch did. He got up and left before the check came. No way. Are you serious? so brandon famously

gets up in scottsdale and leaves um and so he saw me as an opportunity to like reset his karma on this so i got up did you get up and leave i got up to take a phone call and the second i got up brandon paid for the bill? Yeah, it's very funny. Brandon, I didn't know you had that in you. Yeah, well, I'm pretty crafty. You're a prankster. Yeah, you never know. Look at you.

The best part about that story is how you left a $20 tip on a $9,000 bill. I took the fall, yeah. You took the fall. I was telling people about that that have never heard of the show. My wife threw it down after I turned my back. That was nice of her. Yeah. She always does it when we get through dinner. I'll pay the tip on the card and she'll throw a little extra.

And she just did it on there. I don't know why she did it there, but whatever. It's fine. We need that like her, Brandon's wife in history. They fund the Titanic. She's like, $20. Take that. They fund the Titanic. She's like, $20. Take that. What is the big purchase, KB?

Louisiana purchase? One of the bigger ones. The big purchase? We splurged a little bit. Is that a good deal? Is that a good deal? What did we get? We got the entire country and I think we paid him. We won that trade.

We got the entire country, and I think we gave him beads. Like a nickel. Can we look that up? We got a phenomenal deal on that. Is that the big one? Alaska was cheap, too. Alaska was cheap, but Louisiana purchased. Louisiana purchased most of our country.

Great deal. I was trying to think of a big purchase. Didn't we just buy Louisiana? That's huge. It was Florida, too, right? No, it's like all the way up. It's the entire west. Yeah, it's That's huge. It was Florida too, right? No, it's like all the way up. It's the entire west. It's the entire west.

Oh, shit. That's not even a lot of Louisiana. We didn't get all Louisiana. Why'd we... Okay. Holy shit. I think we bought it to get New Orleans though. Ah, the port.

You need the port cities. And the Mississippi, it looks like. Actually, we might get ripped off. There's a lot of garbage in there. The worst part of Texas. Great sunsets in Oklahoma. Is Denver in there? Yeah.

Wait, wait. This was not worth it. Oh, yeah. Garbage. What did we pay for? Outside of Montana. I think it's the Mississippi. Why didn't we get all of North Dakota?

Why do they keep some of that? Iowa, bottom of Minnesota. Yeah, show me something. It looks like we bought it for New Orleans. How come? In the Mississippi. Why is Louisiana a different color than the rest of Louisiana Purchase? That doesn't make sense.

Oh, yeah, I think that's Mississippi that we bought. Is that the Mississippi territory? Yeah, I don't... That one we should have... We paid nothing for. Well, it's good people. Terrific food. Can you find out what we paid for that, TJ? Well, they're not going to come do it. We don't owe it right now, Big Ken. What do you mean? The way

you're asking, like, we... I want to know what we paid for Louisiana. We'll have to settle this today. Alright. The slush fund? Yeah. Oh, that's a million? We scammed them. Holy fuck. Today's $340 million. That's so cheap. That is so cheap. It's like a baseball contract.

Who did we buy it from? We gave them a Machado. Yeah. Who did we get it from? Garrett Cole or France? France, right? The United States. France.

Yeah, but what was France going to do? France always was giving us shit. And they didn't want it. Four cents per acre. Oh my God. It was a statue, bitch.

Crazy. They got fleeced. What were they going to do with it? What did they do with the money? What was France going to do with Kansas?

I don't know. I bet you they could come up with some converted things. That would be awesome if France just owned one state. You know how Rafeville of France ended up there? Oh. Is that how what? Do that. Do that. That was good, Brandon. It would be wild if just in 2023, France

owned Kansas. Yeah. You could just go to France, technically. It had like French architecture and that's a lot of places in the world where they're just French outliers. Yeah. Where are you going? Topeka. Well aren't like the French embassies technically France like in the United States?

Are they? Yes. I think like the actual land that they sit on is like sovereign and this might be way wrong yeah it sounds right i like what you say every time we dive into this it proves how are all they say it confidently enough you're what about u.s and france the u.s embassy that's all because i'd be like i'm in the that's why you're if you commit a crime you always want to get back to the american embassy at least

that's what they do in movies it's like tag you want to run back to yeah yeah embassy. At least that's what they do in movies. It's like tag. You want to run back to... Yeah. Like tag. Are all the embassies here? Exactly like tag. Yeah. Geopolitics is pretty much one big game of tag. That's right. This was fun. So wait, could Roan go to the Iran embassy?

Oh, fuck. Wait, does Iran have an embassy? I doubt that. I doubt Iran has an embassy. No, they might, because they're always snooping around down in D.C. and people... Hold on.

Iran is? Snooping around? in D.C. Hold on. Iran is? Snooping around? Get out of here, Iran. They might even have one in New York. Oh, Iran's snooping in my trash again. Yes, 3rd Avenue. There goes the neighborhood. All right, so wait.

It's in 3rd Avenue? Iran Embassy. Here or there? Iran. It says former, though. Looks like we have new neighbors. Former Embassy of Iran. Oh, you can go to the virtual embassy.

Let's go to Iran right now and tell them that we did it before. But Ron's not here. Yeah, no, we did it before he did it. You did it before him. All right, so we're in Iran? Is this it? Looks scary already. Look at that.

The first thing is the travel alert. Not good. Hmm. Ah, so I pointed out this is the U.S. Embassy for Iranians. Oh. Okay. Okay. That explains so much.

I look really stupid. Oh, man. Poison lunch. Crazy what money will do to a guy. I just went and bought these hats for $15 on Amazon. Used a company card. Those kind of hats are really expensive. Want to try one on, Sass?

They're nice hats. Put this one on. You look sick. What's up with that one? You're kidding me. Oh, no. I didn't know that was open. Oh, you got good pants?

Oh, those are great What are those Are those made out of flex seal I just don't think he's washed them From the store yet What the fuck Oh they're sinking My bad sass

There it goes My bad And he needed the cap I didn't realize that was open He's about to be cranky as fuck Oh no That's the worst thing That's ever happened to anybody

Oh Sorry man Sorry sass At least you get to put on that hat Yeah you do get to put on that hat. Yeah, you do get to put on that hat. That's pretty big. Wait, don't we clean up piss with that?

What sweatshirt is that? It doesn't matter. Just clean it with it. Oh, we might have cleaned that up with piss. I think somebody pissed on that. What? Yeah. Is that a boy dad shirt? No.

What size is that shirt? Brandon, why don't you try it on? Triple X, Brandon. There you go. Who's been mean to you so far, Titus? Like externally or in the office? Well, externally probably a lot of people, but internally. It's been pretty good so far.

How do you feel about coming into the company and taking my producer? Oh. I feel great. TJ's awesome. Yeah. I will say, though, TJ and I, when we met in Scottsdale, Dan saw this. We had maybe the worst handshake of all time. It was embarrassing.

Another thing that Tim Hitchings failed TJ on. It was... And shakes. I can't help but feel like it was a horrendous omen for maybe where the show is headed that I met TJ for the first time. He was, if I remember right, he was like eating the pizza and...

I had just gotten in the pool, so I was soaking wet. That's right, yeah. I wiped my hand off on a wet towel and then went for a dap and then retracted. Oh, no. I went for a handshake because I'm just a handshake guy. Yeah, I am too.

I'm just a classic Midwestern man that's like, I'm going to shake your hand and look you in the eye. But TJ's like, I got wet hands and also pizza hands. So he starts wiping his hand on his pants. So I was like, it's all good, man. We'll just do the fist bump. But at this point, he had already wiped his hands. So he's like, no, I went through all this trouble.

Let's shake hands. So he goes for the handshake because I'm fist bumping. We switch. Oh, no. And then we're just kind of like half. We're just kind of, you know, just half like that. Oh, Jesus. I'd link up.

And I don't think, TJ, we haven't. We should like, I don't know. Maybe haven't we should like I don't know maybe we should yeah should redo that I don't know yeah I don't because I don't think we when I saw him then in New York I don't think we I think I just gave him away yeah a little salute we did there was a um spitting chiclets meet and greet for a flyers thing down at Chickie's and Pete's in Philly and for some reason I was there and it was one of the first ever like meet and greet type things I did so I was like a little nervous for some reason and I went to shake this girl's hand and I I scissored her we like our hands slipped and I we were like this for a second and I while

we were connected I went like that and she went like that too and it was and then we detached but I I still think about it oh man we sciss. It's just that the Brandon Walker College Football Show is producerless now. Oh, no. You're still doing that show? It's had two years of – I've been asking him that question every day. Two years of success, and, you know, it's just we had a good time together. It was fun.

I just enjoyed it, but now I don't have a producer for that show. Good thing we have seven months to figure that out. Did you help Mark with the name of his show? Oh, clearly he didn't because there's not enough Mark Titus. Yeah, there's not. There's one? Yeah, there should be at least two or three. Yeah, how am I supposed to know who's in it?

You can get there. Pickett, can I ask a favor? Yeah. Oh! Look at that. Let's subscribe. Can everyone subscribe? Please to the Mark Titus Show.

You want too many subscribers. Yeah, too many subscribers before I've even put out a show. No, see, this is, yeah, you do want the subscribers. Oh, you do? Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're going to be streaming college basketball tonight from the Mark Titus Show. Oh, yeah.

YouTube, are you going to be there? You didn't ask me. I did ask you. You did not ask me. I asked you when you were sitting at your desk, and you didn't respond. You did not ask me. So, Brandon, are you going to be there tonight? No, you're making that up.

You got your fancy hat, and now you're just saying fancy hat things. All right. So, are you going to be there tonight? I might. Okay. What's the game? There's a lot of games. Okay.

Titus, would you like me to come? Yeah, you can come, Brandon. Bring a gun. You're invited. Yeah, bring a gun. Nate Oates. That story is insane. I did not realize that he reached out to Ray Lewis privately.

Hey, murderer, come help me with these murderers. Every quote that's come out of Nate Oates' mouth since this story first broke, I've had to read it like three or four times. There's no way. I don't understand what the joke is. This is obviously a joke, but I'm too stupid to figure out what is funny about you saying that the head coach said

we had Ray Lewis in to talk to us. It's a tragic situation. To be like, yeah, someone on this team is accused of murder, so the first thing I thought of, Ray Lewis. I guess he is a good person. He's the right guy to ask. You probably shouldn't tell everyone.

Two people, him and OJ. Yeah, he's not wrong in that regard. If you're trying to work past a murder situation to win a championship, I feel like Ray Lewis is the guy to reach out to. Nate Oates is about to come out of the tunnel with a real cool dance. We forgot about the murder. It's a cool dance. His quote yesterday that he's since retracted where he was basically like,

I can't control him outside of practice. Wrong place, wrong time. Wrong place, wrong time is now, I will say that's like not the, this feels like an excuse that's worked for him before because it is kind of a get out of jail free card. No matter what you do, you can just say it was the wrong place, wrong time. But then that implies there's a right time. I'm trying to justify this.

Is he just trying to reduce this guy's sentence? This guy's not charged. So what happened was. Yeah, go ahead, Brandon. But he doesn't want to. Brandon's our college basketball guy. He's trying to protect this guy's sentence. This guy's not charged. So what happened was. Yeah, go ahead, Brandon. But he doesn't want to. It's a whole story for him. Brandon's our college basketball guy. He's trying to protect this guy from.

So make sure you clip this and put this on his show. So one of his teammates is indicted for murder, right? And this guy, Brandon Miller, was texted by that guy. Hey, bring me my gun. This guy left his gun in Brandon Miller's car. Brandon Miller, at 1 a.m., gets in his car, drives back over there. The guy gets his gun out, goes and kills the girl. But they can't prove, and they won't prove, and they don't believe they need to prove

that Brandon Miller knew what was going to happen. This kid's going to be like a lottery pick. He's going to be a lottery pick. A high lottery pick. I also read that he used his car to block the other car from getting out. Now, here's the thing. His car was at- Oh, wait, wait, wait.

So the original guy, when this came out. Is it? Is what? Isn't Brandon Miller? Oh, he was on. There's another guy. Darius Miles. Okay.

Darius Miles on the team was out for the season with an ankle injury. Yeah. And so he's the one who's being accused. But he murdered? I thought. Also a third guy too. Yeah. I thought it was the Darius guy who provided the gun for another guy.

No, no. Brandon, it was Darius shot the girl? No, no, no. He did. You're right about this because Darius, so that's why Brandon Miller's not getting charged, right? Because he was an accessory to an accessory. The guy who killed the person wasn't on the team. No, his last name was Davis.

Right. And Brandon Miller, it seems like it wasn't his gun, but the Darius guy is getting charged. Correct. Darius' gun. Not to be confused with the Darius Miles that was in the perfect score. Yes. For on the Clippers. Yeah.

Okay. So. He's not related to that Darius? Do we clear it up? Yes. I'm not. You guys made it way more. Shout out Quentin Richardson. Essentially, Nate Oates' biggest fault here is he has known that it was

Brandon Miller was loosely attached. And, again, he's not been charged with anything. But he never really said it until there was a hearing yesterday. And then they were like, hey, what about your star player being brought up in this hearing? And then he was like, well, I can't control what happens outside the back. He said it like Brandon Miller, like Mr. Magood, his way into the situation. Yeah, yeah.

And didn't consciously bring a gun to a... And it's also just very, like, anytime anything like this happens, it's funny when a coach pretends like they don't know everything about their players because to be a college coach in football or basketball, you need to be an absolute psycho and you know exactly what's going on in your program at all times. It's the Joe Pa. Joe Pa being like, I had no idea.

I know everything about everyone in this town. I just didn't know about this. He had the luxury of being 200 years old. Yeah, that's true. That's true. And ultimately, Nate nate oats is not like again terry's or uh brandon miller's not being charged with anything no no and alabama fans have been on one oh yeah oh yeah they hate me oh yeah oh yeah so you said that the coach shouldn't be allowed to coach anymore i think if i based on what he said yesterday i was like in the moment i thought he should be fired. Like, this is a

fire. I don't think fired. I think they should I think tonight and that might be because I bet South Carolina he and Brandon Miller should sit out. I think Brandon Miller should definitely sit out. And probably should have been sitting this whole time if he were a part of an active investigation.

And the most deafening silence is coming from Rico Bosco. This motherfucker. Did you hear what he did? Yeah, he left a group text message. That was about college basketball. Yeah. He's like best friends.

Nate Oates, I think he's called into this show. No, you're thinking of... He was the coach of Arkansas. Eric Musbus. Musbus. Okay, never mind. Who did he murder? No one.

Nobody. Yet. We know of. Arkansas, though. News travels slowly. Yeah. Gonzaga, actually, last year. Oh, okay.

Did murder them. There is no video of the shooting, Sass, so sorry if you're laughing. Yeah, you can't get your chuckles off. Sass loves watching

people get murdered. Well, that guy didn't get murdered. No, that guy's alive. Oh, he is. Is he cool now? Is he chilling? So he went home. I've been trapped.

Oh, no. Oh, no. I was following the whole thing. Oh, no. Because I was like, I'm definitely going to get fired. And he went home like a month after, but then he had to go back to the hospital. But I think he's home again now. He's definitely alive.

He's just fucking with you at this point. Yeah. I think he knows. I think he's seen it. It's like toss him a retweet. Yeah. Yeah. We'd love to have you on the podcast sometime.

Clear this whole thing up. This whole thing behind us. Zass tries to explain to him why it was funny. Yeah. But you had the burger. Yeah. You get it, though, right? You're eating a hamburger.

I don't think you're really understanding. What aren't you getting, man? Brandon, you want to do the first ad? About High Noon? Yeah. I sure would. Appears to be the only ad about high noon yeah i sure would uh appears to be the only ad but that's okay high noon is a hard seltzer made with real vodka real juice and sparkling water is a delicious refreshing drink that you can drink while watching basketball with the boys

or maybe watching football or maybe watching anything i don't know or you're at a bar or you're hanging out with friends it's just a drink that you all enjoy together. That's true. What's your favorite flavor, Kate? Peach and watermelon. That's flavor, not flavors. I like them both. I can't pick between.

I like the peach as well, and I also like the watermelon. It's made with vodka and not with malt like other hard seltzers. They now have big cans of peach and pineapple available. My favorite flavor, once again, is peach. Titus, what's your favorite flavor of High Noon? I'm a lime guy, I think. Lime is pretty good, actually. Only 100 calories.

You're going to fit in nicely around these parts. Food free, no added sugar. Their full-time flavors are pineapple, black cherry, watermelon, grapefruit, lime, peach, mango, passion fruit, and lemon. But you can get limited edition flavors like pear and cranberry in the tailgate pack, and you can get kiwi and guava in the pool pack. Look for High Noon on Drizzly or at your local convenience or liquor store, or visit highnoonspirits.com to find it near you.

Read, ad, read. They're sponsoring that best bar this year, the one that Penn State wins every single year. Yeah, there's a lot of East Carolina ones. Oh, they win? Sub Dogs. They changed it for this year. The Jonas Brothers just won. Yeah, and Mr's a lot of East Carolina ones. East Carolina. Sub Dogs. They changed it for this year. The Jonas Brothers just changed it.

Yeah, and Mr. Beast is the East Carolina guy. Oh, Jesus. This year they changed it up where it's Best Bar Town, not Best Bar. Those are still going to be college towns, right, for the most part? Yeah, it's just because Sub Dogs won every year pretty easily, so they tried to switch it up a little bit.

Yeah, I remember one year I helped another bar, and Sub Dogs got really upset at me. I was like, what? You can't win every year. I win every year. They win every year. What town is East Carolina in? Greenville.

Yeah. Is it? Yeah. Yes. Are you sure? Yes. Did you enjoy the county quiz I sent you? Yeah, it's the best.

Counties are the best. Oh, county quiz. Me and KB have been bonding over text through counties. How many subscribers are we at? Maybe Tidy should get wet. It is in Greenville. I'm sorry. Oh, man.

Nice. We should at least have to spin a wheel. Uh-oh. You spin a wheel that's half wet, half dry. Would it remind me of wet? You have to just go get in the shower. Jump in the shower. Yeah, and then come back wet.

All right, we'll do it. All right, so if we get to 10,000, we'll spin a wheel that's just half wet, half dry. Also possible, Glennie Balls is in that bathroom. Oh, he does. I'm usually, I can tell what somebody would look like wet. I don't have it with you. Yeah. I don't have a fucking clue. I'd like to see you wet. I don't have it with you. Yeah. I don't have a fucking clue.

I'd like to see you wet. A lot of people have said that to me. Yeah, I don't. All my life. Can't picture it. Yeah. Close my eyes. Nope.

Nothing. Don't have it. Are we allowed to add stuff to our own wheel? Yes, at any time. Okay. Might as well spin the real wheel right now, TJ, while we're talking. What are you going to add? I want to add, I want to do that thing where we each have to put the rubber band

around the watermelon Oh yes! Let's just do it Can we just put that on the regular wheel? Can we just do it? Why don't we just do things? Let's just do that Let's do that tomorrow

I just feel like it would be fun to put a watermelon right there with a bunch of rubber bands When that was popular over quarantine people doing that Do that tomorrow. I just feel like it'd be fun to put a watermelon right there with a bunch of rubber bands. We have goggles. When that was popular over quarantine, people doing that, me and Kyle tried to do it, but we paid somebody to like, it was going to explode after the first rubber band. And it just, it was like, the tech just wasn't there yet. Oh no. We spent two days on that. Yeah.

I wonder if that's still up there. I don't know where we could find, yeah, it was so bad. Posted, I think. Yeah, we we didn't care i have a new obsession it's i watched gangs of new york oh let's go i just watched the the first like battle scene and i was obsessed with 1800s new york city so now i just watch slideshows of pictures of 1800s New York. Whoa. Good movie. Send me anything. That first battle where he throws the axe in that guy's back. It was terrific. No, watch it.

It's the most rubber thing in the world. It looks like shit. Oh, it looks fake? It looks like shit. Yeah. Pure shit. There are fish hooking mouths. They're ripping faces off.

Yeah, like a chimpanzee. And a lot of that I recognize. The architecture is still up in downtown. Isn't five points not a real place or that main where like all the streets met yeah you could still see some of it in downtown there's a dude that has an instagram handle it's like um hidden gems of new york and he actually offered me a tour. You should go on it. Yeah, like what? Like historical? Like historical buildings and shit.

That's cool. No, you wouldn't want to do it? I'll hit him up right now. Virtually. Okay. Then just follow him. Yeah, follow him. I think it's hidden gems of New York.

I'll shout it out. Let's get him to 10,000 followers too. Maybe I don't know what it is. Okay. All right. All right. It's dry. It's dry.

Fart Eliminator is, I think I watched that right. Can't leave until you do. It's just the microphone that we're. I think all of them. Yeah, I watched that right. That's the one. Can't leave until you do. It's just the microphone that we're... I think all of them. Yeah, I get the one. So that will be when we spin for wet and dry. If you get wet, you can be out of wet if you fart. It has to be a wet fart.

Yeah. It has to be a wet fart. Yeah, I'll allow that. Oh, absolutely. I don't know what it is, Kyle. I'm sorry. There's like actual science behind why wet farts smell worse, right? I think that's like a thing.

There's an article. It makes sense. I mean, they definitely do. You read an article about wet farts? About why they smell. There's an article about every goddamn thing. I know. The wetness has to come from fluid in the ass, which would probably smell.

No, no. I mean like a shower fart. Oh. Like why your farts smell worse in the shower. I don't fart in the shower. You think that's what a wet fart is. You think a wet fart is when you're just when you're already wet and then fart?

Yeah, like a pool fart. They're definitely louder. Pool farts don't stink. Pool farts are pretty much just air. Pool fart has been stunk. Shower farts stink. Shower farts stink, but I think it's also from the heat from the shower. Like the steam.

Pool farts are, no, there's no smell. I do lovearts stink, but I think it's also from the heat from the shower. Like the steam. Yeah. But pool farts are, you know, there's no smell. I do love, Kate, that you are like a 60-year-old Midwest mom being like, I read this article. Is there an article that explains why taking a shit after you shower is like the worst thing ever? Oh, wet bee cheeks. Yeah. Yeah, I think it's because of the wipe. Yeah, your ass is all sticky. It's like you're sliding everywhere.

Number two on worst shits ever is when you're at a beach or at a pool. Yeah. That's the worst. Yeah. I guess it would be very similar to the shower. I've never had a clean shit at a pool. No. No, and then you have to put the bathing suit back on.

And the tile is a little sandy, but but also wet so you slip a little bit. Tough texture. Yeah, very tough texture. One of the worst textures. The tile floor with a little bit of sand and wet. Probably the most dangerous texture in the world. I have an aversion to it. You do?

Yeah. Just that specific thing we described. That's right. Okay. I don't think I've ever had a normal pool shit, though. What do you mean? If I'm shitting at a pool, if I have to take a shit while I'm swimming, it's a bad shit. Right, because if I have to shit at the pool, I'm just going to hold the shit.

Yeah. Oh, no. Roan's back. You've got to challenge him. Here he goes. Oh. This is going to be awkward. This is going to be really awkward.

Do you know anything? Think about things that rhyme with throne. Bone. Yeah, that's right. Bone. Bone. Phone. Phone.

Phone. Prone. I don't know how you can hurt him with any of these words, though. Yeah. You can hurt him with bone. Yeah, bone. You can talk about how you took his throne. Oh.

Holy shit. Something like that Let's write the throne Maybe invite him to eat a scone That wouldn't really be mean at all Yeah it would, Roan's watching his figure Yeah, get on your phone It's too polite to say no

To call in from a tough spot Look at your bone I got your throne So Karl Malone was on He was just being recognized And part of the panel Yeah so And the Carl Malone thing

I know So we had him on PMT That was probably regrettable I didn't know all of the shit And so many people don't Right He's been going viral recently I know. Recently

we had him on in like 2020 I want to say. And I remember after a post people were like why would you do this? I was like wait what? And then I started reading but I was like oh yeah fair point by everyone. Wrong place wrong time right? Wrong place wrong time. I mean she was 13

yes but he was only 20. I think he was 19. Oh, 19. Yeah. He was 20. He was 20. She was 13 when she had the kid. Right.

Brand. China was wrong place, wrong time, because it was the deep south in the 1980s. Yeah. Early 80s, too. The fact that he got away with it, it was right time. Wrong act. Wrong act. Do y'all know how he got away with it? The girl's family

wouldn't press charges because he was about to get rich in the NBA. They were taking the chances on that and he never did a goddamn thing for them. Wait, was it twins too? It was just one. And he had twins with another girl. I don't understand.

They're still cool? Playing basketball, right? I think the don't understand. They're still cool? If you're Carl Malone. Playing basketball, right? I think the first kid ended up in the NFL. Or was that one of the twins? No. This kid ended up in the NFL. Oh.

Now he's 14 years old. We're back in the Brandon. Where did Brandon Miller have the gun? Well, it was in the backseat of the car, I think. It was in a hat. I have a question. It was in a hat? I think it was in a hat. Why? If you're It was in a hat? I think it was in a hat.

Why? If you're Karl Malone, I guess he probably just doesn't have Twitter. Like a fitted or a snapback? What kind of hat? I'd imagine some sort of beanie. Hornet snapback. If you're Karl Malone, why would you want to go do these things knowing that everyone's going to just bring up that you're a pedophile? Because it's probably a lot of people that are there are probably like, holy shit, that's Carl Malone.

I guess it was in Utah. It's the mailman. But I think that if the internet was hot on, like, hey, that guy's a pedophile, I'd probably be like, yeah, I'm just going to chill. I'm not going to do anything. I think Bill Cosby could still sell out. I think he is.

He's doing a tour. He's fine. Is he really? Some people care, but overall. I was going to get you tickets, Brandon. I'm going. OJ's tweeting through it. Yeah, that's true. OJ is tweeting through it. Also, people don't take

murder the same way that they take pedophilia and sexual crimes. Some dogs just die, though. Yeah, but it is funny that dog murder is viewed online as way more severe than human murder.

I think just being mean to dogs is akin to human murder. Kicking a dog is worse than killing another human being online. Yeah. Yeah, no, agreed. Yeah. How many dogs? Oh, no. Oh, Che.

Oh, Stephen Che. Who's upside Che? Yeah. Stephen Che. Who's that besides Che? Yeah. Stephen Che. I didn't know you were a huge Karl Malone fan. Didn't we make Nadeau wear it? Yeah. That was good.

I think he willingly picked me. Yeah, I think he did. He was the first pick. What happened to our jerseys? Where are they? Probably in a pile somewhere. They were supposed to stay in here. They were supposed to stay in here. They were supposed to stay in here.

We could use them all the time. Yeah. Never used them again. He'll be back out there soon. And our jersey guy has moved on. He found a new corner. What's your Coachella jersey, Brandon? Ooh.

Who's Coachella? You always wear, like, an obscure basketball player. That's Lollapalooza. Coachella's higher grade fashion. Okay. Lollapalooza, Coachella's higher grade fashion. Okay. Lollapalooza jersey. I've never been to any of these. I just like, what's the jersey you're wearing that you're getting ready

and you're saying everyone's going to say, I'm cool. Dominique Wilkins. Yeah? No. I got a Dominique Wilkins. That would be more obscure. Yeah, that's a little too mainstream. What about like a Penny Hardaway All-Star jersey?

Like an Austin Crozier? No, I think that's trying too hard. So I've got to find the middle? Yeah. No, this is actually a very, like, a real question. E. Brown. Illinois? No, the other one.

The one who died. Yeah. No, Reggie Lewis died. Reggie Lewis died. Celtics number seven? Yeah. Yeah. Reggie Lewis would work. How about Reggie Lewis died. Yeah. No, Reggie Lewis died. Reggie Lewis died. Celtics number seven. Yeah. Yeah. Reggie Lewis would work.

How about Reggie Lewis? 35? M. Bias, Maryland. Coachella. That's trying too hard. No, it's not trying too hard. That could be a party guy. Are you guys going to go to Lollapalooza?

Why? Are you all going to be in Chicago? No. Is that where that is? I've gone. Yeah. It's fun. They still do that?

I don't like crowds that big anymore. Yeah, they still do that. Who's headlining that? Pearl Jam? I saw Kanye. Who? Kanye? Yeah.

Damn. Before he hated Jews. He hated them then. What if Kanye and Bill Cosby combined? I don't think that's something you just develop. That's true. I'd go to that. It actually is. It is. I don't know. I noticed deal with that. It actually is.

It is. It is. I don't know. Yeah, I noticed that as soon as I said it. I didn't even know about them until. So I moved to New York. New York, yeah. Yeah, we were talking about Roald Dahl on the rundown the other day.

Oh, yeah. He was a big Hitler guy. Wait, really? He put out. He was an anti-Jew guy. His library versus battle against anybody, he's winning. Yeah. Wait, I know... O'Dall?

Yeah. Yeah, he's up there. Matilda, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Yeah. Names of the Giant Peach. Names of the Giant Peach. Names of the Giant Peach. The Witches.

I never liked... Oh, he's... I loved his stuff. Here's the quote from... I've been laughing. It's not funny, but I've been laughing about it. Roald Dahl said, there's a trait in the Jewish character

that does provoke animosity. Even a stinker like Hitler didn't just pick on them for no reason. Oh, what? I feel like I saw that very recently. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He busted out the pen for that one. Yeah.

He was writing, yeah. Calling busted out the pen for that one. Yeah. He was writing, yeah. Calling Hitler a stinker is so funny. That's an all-time but. Even a goofball like Hitler. Yeah, that's stinker Hitler. What? It's calling Hitler a stinker. It was so tame.

No one's ever called Hitler a stinker. It's a safe word for fart. I know. Yeah, you say that like when you're like five, you say that to your sibling. I'm trying to think of stinker acts. What is something somebody does that when you're like five. You say that to your sibling. I'm trying to think of stinker acts. What is something somebody does that deems them stinker? Six million Jews.

Yeah. That's the definition of a stinker. You walk up to the ski ball hole and put the ball in yourself, man. Yeah, that's a stinker move. And then the six million.

Yeah. Tying someone's shoelaces together. That's a stinker move. Stinker. Hitler's a stinker. Yeah. Rearranging the letters on a sign. Hitler and Bart Simpson.

Yeah. Two stinkers. Two of the world's most notorious stinkers. Yeah, but I mean, it is true. Hitler was a stinker. Hitler pounding but I mean, it is true. Hitler was a stinker. Hitler pounding the podium saying, eat my shorts. Oh, we're getting close to the wheel. We need 10,000.

10,000 and we're going to see our tights get wet. I'll get wet. I'll do it. You're going to get wet. Will you just get wet? I mean, I'll do it. Do you want to spin? Do you have any other clothes? Yeah, I don do it. Will you just get wet? I mean, I'll do it. Do you want to spin? Do you have any other clothes?

Yeah, I don't know. Like, what makes me... You know this, Dan. I long to be a guy who gets it. Yeah. That's very important to me, is that everyone says Titus is a guy who gets it. So I just want to do whatever will make the chat

and the people watching say, damn, this dude gets it. You're like the anti-Sass. make the chat and the people watching say, damn, this dude gets it. You're like the anti-SAS. So whatever it takes for everyone to think I get it, I'll do it. Okay. You called me a fucking dork at OutRN in Columbus. What? And you pushed me aside.

Yeah, you did. When? 2018. Oh, that's right. I do remember this. Yeah. When? 2018. Oh, that's right. I do remember this. Were you working at Barcelona? No.

I was just there and I went up to him and I said, Big fan. Big fan. Big fan is my trigger. Big fan. Yeah. That's right. Your one year anniversary is tomorrow? It was yesterday. That's right. That's right Your one year anniversary Is tomorrow It was yesterday Yesterday

That's right That's right I just don't want to Make it a thing Wait one year Yeah it flew by It was one Yeah

It's fucking That was the fastest year Yeah You think so Cause you started with I felt like it was The longest year You started right before

The Super Bowl in LA Yep Yeah Yeah that's crazy That's nuts Because it's the longest year. He started right before the Super Bowl in L.A. Yep. Yeah. Yeah, that's crazy. That's nuts. That was your first, yeah, the Super Bowl in L.A. was your second week. Jesus Christ.

Yeah. Damn. It's been good, though. Hitler is a real stinker. Stinker. Real stinker. I used to do that. I've never met him until... You played along too well.

I was like, make sure no one says big fan to Titus. Fuck. You do get it. You really do. Get it better than anyone. I have an update from a couple Travis's. Oh.

Three of them dropped out. They can't drop out. Yeah, they can. Travis the owl. What can we do to stop that? Owl dropped out? The guy that submitted the video of the owl said, probably not possible for me to get another video of this owl

because it's not his owl. Somebody dropped out. The guy that said he could beat Brandon in trivia dropped out because he can't do trivia during the day. Oh, what a fucking coward. He's a vampire. And unnamed Travis dropped out because he didn't realize that this would be a public competition and didn't want his name out there.

Even though he submitted a video of him. Unnamed Travis. He submitted a video of him saying his name and a picture of his passport. He doesn't want his public name out there. Yeah, we're trying to find the world's funniest Travis. It's even funnier, though, imagining. I missed it yesterday, but I've been following along.

Yeah. It's such a wild thing for someone to be like, oh, it's not a public thing, but they still submitted something. Right. Like, I just want the fellows to see this. And also be like, I don't want to be named in a Travis competition. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anonymous Travis. That kind of rules.

I want to chase those guys. What do you guys think of Jerry's Hard Cock? Oh, can we watch that video? Yeah. That was... I knew what was coming, and I still was shocked. Did he run it by you before you tweeted it? Okay.

He did, though. I knew something was up, because he texted me right after he posted it. He's like, you seen my video yet? And I was like, uh, no. And then I went and watched it, and I was like, okay. Because I knew there's something here. Just do the last minute. I skipped straight to the end.

I never watched the beginning of the video. Demon time. Demon time. Have you talking anal? He's good at what he does. It made me want that. I've not seen this one. I'm aware of Jason Fragrance.

Trust me on this. Just trust me. When you put this on your system, right, you are going to start to attract a lot of horny males,

including myself. But listen, let's not get there. I have a son and everything, girlfriend and all that. I have a son. I can't be a horny girlfriend.

You put this on, okay? Expect demon time. Expect anal talk and all that stuff so we'll do the test oh my god yeah that's it yeah that's it right there look he's excited hey hey hey hey oh no i want to reiterate this before we get to the, so you know it's a legit review. Because he's happy after one spray. This is a PG-13 type of deal.

All right? This is a PG-13. Oh, no, no, no, no. Bad, good, great. No. Bad, good, very good, great, amazing. Five. Amazing. good, very good, great, amazing. Five. And amazing. I mean, it's a show to see authentic review.

It is an authentic review. I mean, the fact that a smell could get him that hard is crazy. Before I show you my cock, here's a warning. This is PG-13. Yeah. Wait, what did you say? I like Barstool because if I work at a different company, they fire me the day after I get hired because Jerry put out whatever he wants. It's true. I'm still trying to feel out. So I obviously have been Barstool adjacent, if you want to call it that, for a few years.

And I've gotten to know a lot of people here but i'm still trying to feel out like who's joking and who's not yeah joking and jerry i cannot peg for the life of me like i can't tell because there are times like i don't know i watched the the jerry fragrance things and i'm like this this guy is obviously like in on the bit and he's hilarious but then sometimes it crosses into a... Yeah, Jerry's......old rum leg. I mean, he got a real boner. Yeah, no, Jerry's... Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You can't joke your way into a boner. Yeah. Jerry's pretty authentic. You can't prank with a boner. No, no. He's pretty authentic. He's, uh... We've had him on the yak a bunch,

and remember that one time he just started telling us about all the animals he killed? Oh, yeah. It was mice. Oh, he killed a hamster. Oh, and he killed a hamster. It was all rodents. He bleached his sister's hamster.

Yeah, yeah, he did. First time he was ever on the yak, he said his entire credit card number. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Yeah. I just kept on being like, what are the next four numbers? He'd say it. And then next thing you know, he was getting fraud alerts.

Yeah, but I don't think satire has ever seen something where people are the boner level. Yeah. Because it had to have been real. He liked the scent that much. Yeah. No, Jerry's authentic. He couldn't have planned it because there was no cuts in the video. Was he hard the whole time?

I don't know if he... I mean, dude, he was one spray and then four seconds later he's fully hard. As a rock. Because when the camera turns on and you're performing the sexual that turns off because you're on performance. I think he just has remarkable penis control

because he knew it was going to happen. That's a level of comfort that would have to... I've never been hard on pants. I'm on camera an hour a day. Never. Never once hard. Never even close. No. Mincy's another guy that I... No, Mincy.

No, no. Mincy is unintentionally the funniest human being alive. At Grindin'. Did we play that yet? That video was taken down. Oh, was it? Oh, no. Yeah, I mean, Mincy...

I don't know what I... The few times I've talked to him, he just seemed like a normal guy. And then I watch his content. I'm like, this guy is. I mean, last week he made a press release video that he didn't commit a murder of a guy who hadn't died. The bobblehead video was the funniest. Yeah, that's. He ruined my life.

Yeah, that was. I think my favorite Jerry video is still the first fragrance video where he sprays the cologne like 700 times on himself. Yeah. You ever seen the no-hitter video? No. Mincy no-hitter video? That's one of the – and that like – That was his first one.

Mincy doesn't – I think I remember I was talking – I can't remember. Maybe I was talking to Carl at the time because they like weren't going to put it out or something. I was like, no, this has to go out. Like Mincy, he just has a knack to him that's just. First time I ever interacted with him, I was on the dozen playing the Honkers, I think was the team he was on at the time. And he called in from an Ole Miss baseball game. He was in the stands.

I remember that. Yeah. He was at a crowded bar maybe. He was in the stands. In the bleachers where they throw the beers and everything. And he just, he like threw his airpods in and he's like all right jeff i'm ready and jeff's like are you in a baseball game he's like hang on i'll go to my car and that's mincy yeah did you find the no hitter video yeah here it is this one pitching duel no hitter old-fashioned pitcher's duel on our hands.

Jack Leiter through four innings has allowed no hits. He's been phenomenal and dominant, but so has Heifel for NC State. Feels like the first team to score is going to have a great chance to win. But how strong these pitchers look. We're halfway home. Unbelievable game and atmosphere. A little slice of heaven in Omaha on an evening night. You can't beat it.

Did hit a home run. That's Vincy. We got our beat it. Dude hit a home run. That's Vincey. We got our first inning. We got our first inning. As you say this, this is live. As you say this. He was, like, mad. Yeah.

He was, like, disappointed. He's like, here goes my video. Like, that's why he's unintentionally, like, he's like, oh, shit, that ruined my video. It's like, no, that. This is live. Look at that. This is live. Look at him. This is live Ben Mintz talking about the pitcher's duel with Jack White. He's so upset.

You just gave up his first hit. You cursed him. I cursed him completely. I just said he's allowed no hits. The second I said that. No hitter, good old-fashioned pitcher's duel thing. I think he thinks that that would have been a better video if they were correct that's why he's so funny

he was legitimately upset that that happened so funny he just wanted to do an honest bobblehead review his reviews are awesome because he doesn't give a score oh my god they're not reviews at all yeah His reviews are awesome because he doesn't give a score. Oh. Yeah. Here it is. My God, they're not reviews at all.

Yeah. We're just watching him eat and stuff. The best. Did we hit 10,000? Oh, yeah. Yeah. We did? All right.

All right. How about that? I love it. Just before we spin, I'm going to do it, but just walk me through. When it's wet, what happens? Where do I go? There's a, right by? Where do I go? Right by the stairs over there is a bathroom.

It has a shower. Just walk in and sit in the shower. And then come back. Sit if you'd like. You can take your shoes and socks off if you'd like. All right. And now do you want to do, you have the option of doing just one spin or best of seven? What's best?

I mean, best of seven feels more dramatic. Okay, so I think it's whatever the four that happen, he has to do. Four wets, he gets wet. Four dry, he stays dry. Correct. All right. You have to get wet. Or you do what?

You're trying to do one spin. No, no, no. We're doing seven spins. All right, we'll do seven. Yeah, yeah. Best of seven. Thank you for everyone subscribing. We're going to be live streaming college basketball tonight from the Mark Titus Show YouTube page. Yeah, yeah. Pass the seven. Thank you for everyone subscribing.

We're going to be live streaming college basketball tonight from the Mark Titus Show YouTube page. Watching people that might be connected to murders. Yeah, that's true. They do play. I like this color. This color scheme. Oh, yeah, that's what it is. Shout out, Nick. Thank you, guys.

There you go. One try. You're good. You're good. We're doing multiple? Hell, yeah, that's what it is. Shout out, Nick. Nick's face. Thank you, guys. There you go. One dry. One dry. You're good. You're good. We're doing multiple? Hell, yeah.

Congrats, man. You're staying dry. Yeah. Never goes down. And you got one wet. Okay. So what? One to one.

All right. Good to even things out. That's the five. What do you do? You start taking the shoes off. Yeah. That usually is a good way to jinx it. You don't talk about your run in Arizona enough, big cat. Into the finals, three days in a row.

Three days and never getting wet. It's too dry. No, I dig it. Did that on your own, right? That was a penance, right? Oh, yeah. Yeah, because he's a bunch of cheaters. Oh!

3-1 lead. 3-1 lead. Yeah. 3-1 lead. Ever been blown. Ever been blown. Oh, wow! Chat's not going to like you.

Oh, man. Yeah, this is a rock. Yeah, but if you go get wet, you'll be a tryhard. You're fine. Yeah. So, yeah, I'm just kind of fucked because if I go get wet,

I'm a tryhard. Oh, they wanted you wet. And I don't respect... No, they respect the wheel more than anything. They don't do anything. They don't respect us as human beings.

They respect the wheel. I just have to go kill myself now. Yeah. That's the only way to get the respect. Well, we did the death wheel and Brandon was the only one who lost. That was a rush. Yeah. That's the only way to get the respect. Well, we did the death wheel, and Brandon was the only one who lost.

That was a rush. Yeah, that was such a rush. Yeah. Thank you guys for subscribing, by the way. Put the subscriber count up. It just starts going down. Yeah. It's like, fuck that.

Yeah. Oh, you got dry. It will. That will happen. They're giving you Ws for being willing to do it. Yeah. No, see, that's the beauty of what you did. I would have done it.

I promise. I fucking gets it, man. I promise. The key to the wheel is being down for anything and then just hoping it doesn't go against you. Yeah. If you just pretend to be down for the wheel, you can't lose on this show. You're like, oh, I'll fucking light my balls on fire.

I'm very pro-wheel. I am very pro-wheel. I love the wheel. It owns our life. Yeah. It's great. In fact, I may or may not have stolen the wheel for decisions I make in my own life. A lot of people do that, and it's actually the best way to make decisions because who wants to?

And then the second you hit spin, you're like, actually, I know exactly what I want. Yeah. Yeah. Nice. Go for anything. Please land on the one I want. Yeah. All right. Well, I got to go to lunch.

Oh, yeah. You guys can keep yakking. Have fun. I'm going to have a great time. Oh, yeah. I tried the hat on. I just wanted to see him in the hat for a little bit. I'll put the hat on.

By the way, Jenks, I think, is going on a date with Frank. That's right. He's, you know, you guys gave up on Jenks, too. Oh, I didn't. I didn't. I just't I couldn't go on I won't do it, Nick won't do it I'm doing him a favor I would not be a fun

I would not be fun Kate you're still going to do it right? Yeah, go to the museum with him It's very personal I try not to Sorry if you guys have already talked about this There's a museum of sex not too far away from here. It used to be next to our old office.

Really? Yeah. I imagine you guys already. It was already on your radar. But I just was walking by, and I saw the museum of sex. Has anybody been in there? I did a video there once for part time. Oh, really?

Yeah, you did? I worked there before this job. I was like what? 16 months ago? Yeah. I taught people how to fuck. I gotta teach you how to fuck. You got to.

That's week two of your orientation. Right after HR I teach you how to fuck. Put it on the wheels. You can't have a company where people don, teach how to fuck. Put it on the wheels. Put it on the wheels. You can't have a company where people don't know how to fuck. I'm saying this as a friend. You've got to let me.

I like you. Let me teach you how to fuck. Yeah. Are there any tips? Just one. In terms of the onboarding process at Barstool. Making my life easier. Is there anyone I should just go punch them in the face?

You know, like pull the prison move where you're like set an alpha mentality. Is there anybody I need to? Do you want me to give him? I can make a presentation. Oh, yeah. Be my first subject. Yeah, yeah. You have that, right?

I can have it for tomorrow, yeah. Okay. All right, yeah. Steven will give you – he has a slideshow. Steven cornered me today and asked me about college basketball futures. You're literally sitting in a corner. Yeah, I was sitting in the corner of a room. Well, that's weird.

He boxed me in and was like, who do you like, you know, 8-1 or worse odds or whatever. And I think I listed every single school I could think of and just muddied the waters as much as possible. Just to get out of it. And I was hoping he would walk away at some point, and then he just stood there and was like, so who do you like? Steven's my special little boy. So I owe Steven that.

I told him I'd go do my homework and report back to him. Yeah. Oh, I will now that you're officially part of Barcelona. I will, Mark, later today I'll tell you all the secrets that Kyle Rudolph told me about the Bucs and Tom Brady. I'm not telling Steven. But I have a lot of secrets. Steven, that's frustrating, huh? Maybe a little bit.

Maybe not. Oh. Okay. Yeah, I don't a little bit. Maybe not. Oh. Okay. Yeah, I don't think Hat Steven gives a fuck. Hat Steven's awesome. Oh, Hat Steven is... Hat Steven's plugged in. Hat Steven's going to steal your girl.

No. But... I have good manners. That was really off-putting. I won't steal your girl, but I have good manners. Genuinely off-putting I won't steal your girl, but I have good manners Genuinely off-putting I actually did see a tweet Or it might have been a comment on the YouTube

Someone, because I don't know why I said that I was having a third child Like a few weeks ago, but then You know, the internet travels slow sometimes So some people, it was new news yesterday And someone was like, congrats to Big Cat, and the comment underneath was like, you mean congrats to Nadeau.

And I was like, oh, damn. That is probably what happened. Damn it. Yeah, that's tough. It was right around Barstow Idol time. Yeah, it's just a... God damn it. Are they going to let you in the restaurant with those shoes?

Didn't it say? It said no sneakers. Oh, no. That would be a shame. That's insane. What is Nate rocking? These are nice sneakers, though. What's your shoe situation today, Steven?

Boots. Wow. I think if the sneakers cost more than nice shoes, it should count. Yeah. 550s. Those are pricey. Right. Yeah. $5.50. Those are pricey. Right. Those are $550?

Is that the perfect way to end this? Yeah, they're kind of close. They are kind of close. Oh, shit, KB, you have the exact same. Yeah, you know a trend is dead if I'm rocking them. Oh, if I'm rocking them. That's when it's two years or one year old. Oh, it's me, KB. I'm the one.

I might get a pair of those. Yeah, no. Let's go get a pair. Yeah, I think I might. Brandon already has a whole. TJ has a pair? No, I'm not doing that. I'm not following you down the road.

Oh, wow. Look at Roan. Oh, my goodness. Roan. Wow. Roan, come here. Wow. Am I not going. A dapper man. Am I not going to get in because of my shoes?

Change your shoes. I got a hat for you. You want the white one or the gray one? The white. The gray works better with what he's wearing. Talk in the mic. Talk in the mic. Also, Titus has a rap battle for you.

Really? Go hit him. Hit him. Rone, bone, phone. Rone. hit him. Hit him, hit him. Roan, bone, phone. Roan, throne. Roan, nice phone. Pretty good. Nick will teach you

how to bone. Oh, shit. Yes, dude. Yeah. I teach all the new hires how to fuck. What hat do you want to wear? I think the white might be here.

It looks good. I don't know. Then Nate and I will have the same hat. What's Jay wear? Oh think the white might be your hat. It looks good. I don't know. Then Nate and I will have the same hat. What's Jay wear? Oh, nice. Is that more of a cream? Yeah, shit.

I didn't know the shoes thing. Like a 1960s Briggs Falls. Oh, you look awesome. You look like you're about to go make a purchase in Louisiana. Yes. That hat is a game changer. Yeah. Hell yes.

What have you guys been talking about? I love it. Mostly you. Better get that comedy out of your system now while you're still in New York. Better get that comedy out of your system. We're going to be cracking jokes. I got an email of time stamps of yesterday's yak from upstairs. What did they say?

They were just like, was this a joke? Was this a joke? No. Better learn to cut that shit out. I'm going to the sports hub. You better figure it out. Hell yes. When are we leaving?

We're going right now. I think I got to figure out the shoe situation. What are you going to do? I don't know. You'll probably be okay. Oh, dude. They're like strict as fuck about this. There's a pair of like oversized cowboy boots over there.

Oh, my God. They are like cowboy boots, though, like the big pull-up kind. Fuck. Steven, what did it say? Wasn't there like... I didn't read that part. But no sneakers. Yeah.

But I have a hat. Do they know they're ALD? And glasses. Do they know they're 550s? How could they turn down a man in glasses? Yeah, you're bespoke. You're bespoke as hell. I'll go look around.

How well are the other people dressed? We saw you. What's Nate looking like? You haven't seen him? Not good. Oh, no. He was just like, I'm underdressed. He was bugging out.

Where is he? Can I get him? Get him. Let's get all the boys. Here, I'm going to try to find shoes real quick. Luan got cut. Hey, Lu all the boys. Here, I'm going to try to find shoes real quick. Luonga cut. We'll do a sending off. Hey, the Luonga cut?

Oh, no. Yeah, I saw that today. Not Bullock. Fat Randy? Shame. Is he fat? Yeah. Good for him.

What is it about to launch? I want to go out to lunch now. Fat kickers are the best. Oh, yeah. They're usually not very good. Fat quarterbacks are also funny, but you don't see very many of them. I remember Sebastian Janikowski when he was coming out. Oh, yeah, he was fat.

The draft. First round pick? I remember he was a first round pick, right? Yeah. Yeah, I remember arguing with friends about whether he should be top ten pick. He was a first round pick for real? I think so. First round? David took him in the first round. for real? I think so. Yeah. First round?

David took him in the first round. Kind of worth it. 27th, I believe. Yeah, he was good, but he was never Justin Tucker. Who is the best kicker right now? Justin Tucker. He's not like a soccer player or an Australian? He's an opera singer.

Oh. Yeah. Number 17 pick. Yeah. Wow. 17? Worth it. Worth it i don't know who went after him remember the fucking jets took nugent first round what's his name ike nugent from ohio state yeah oh yeah head nugent's got some ideas i mean if you could guarantee that your player would be like a justin tucker-esque player you would take him in the top five i thought five why not so what who was the browns kicker who like he was the hero week one and then oh jeff bought his jersey the next game look at the elo bought his jersey the two picks after was shauna how many good kickers are there although i think total i think there's probably a

third of the league is good kickers i think that's fair yeah but good kickers can turn into bad kicker brett maher turned into the worst kicker in football in the playoffs he was he was good yeah but he was very good in the regular season if you're past the 50 you're going to score with justin tucker correct you wouldn't take that top five that's awesome that's game changing game changing yes i don't know if it's i would say more so than any position i don't think there's ever a situation where you can take a kicker top five even if you i'm with you like if you if you know the outcome yeah if you 100 know justin tucker is the result of like if you if you're drafting a guy and you know the draft is going to just aren't kickers i know this is a hypothetical brand and hypoth and you know he's going to turn into Justin. Aren't kickers – No, this is a hypothetical, Brandon.

Hypothetically, you know the guy you pick is going to turn into Justin Tucker. You should take him in the top. But a draft is going to have five players that have bigger impact than Justin Tucker. I don't know. We don't know that. What percentage of games – We're saying the rest of the guys you don't know. You don't know how good they are.

How do you magically know Justin Tucker if you don't know the others? Because it's a hypothetical. This is the fun of a hypothetical. Hypothetically, I know how the others turn out too. That's not the hypothetical we're talking about. I doubt right now if you sat down Justin Tucker's draft, he's a top five player in that draft. I don't know.

Let's look at it. Look at the first round of Justin Tucker's draft, wherever it is. Yeah. Nate is a no-show. They're yelling for him. Nate's not here. Nate is a no show they're yelling for him what's going on with Nate right now look at how classy how classy do I look

fantastic wait a minute we can tell the exact length of your dick now not bad inch below zip just a tiny little bit so I think that how can you not let me in Not bad, not bad Inch below zip Just a little bit Just a tiny little bit Inch below zipper So I think that

Like How can you not let me in My man who's Not afraid He didn't show up? No he's got He's got shoes now I'm the only one without shoes

Fuck How many franchises Leading scorer is a kicker? All of them? Yeah That's true. All right, here's the... So, Andrew Luck, Robert Griffin III,

Trent Richardson. Oh, Nick. Uh-oh. What a great draft, isn't it? Uh-oh. What a great draft. All right, so you wouldn't pick him over Gilmore. You'd get Connor's shoes off of him.

Why not? Oh, Connor. Who do you think has changed more games? Well done. You wouldn't take him over Fletcher Cox? Chandler Jones? Yeah. Doing a little faster than my brain can handle.

It's over. The lit up ones are the Pro Bowlers. When was Justin Tucker taken? But also, how can you project a good kicker? What percentage of the best college kickers go on to be good in the NFL? It's almost a crapshoot. So wasn't a kicker taken in the first round not too long ago, and he didn't pan out?

The Bills picked a punter in the second round last year. Well, he was the one that got in trouble. Do you think there's going to be a time when kickers are just extinct? Like the teams just go for two. We'll look back on the college football teams that still have kickers and we'll just laugh at them. There's still the value of if you get to the 45-yard line

with Justin Tucker, you've got three points in your hand. Nate looks completely fine. Did you just do 180? Based on what he said, I was doing that. Nate looks great. He's not underdressed. He's not underdressed doing that. Oh, Nate looks great. He's not underdressed. No, he's not underdressed at all.

Yeah, he looks good. He looks like a newsboy. He's got a tie on. What is he talking about? He's underdressed. Yeah, no, he looks great. I would say, no offense to Steven, he's probably the one. A little underdressed.

I'm going to go Roan 1, Nate 2, Big Cat 3, and Steven Che 4. Yeah. Steven Che, that's just an everyday sweater he's wearing. That's just a sweater. Just a sweater. I think also the purple. That wasn't right. The purple is a little too.

No, purple is a bad idea. I agree. Roan is definitely 1. Roan is definitely 1. A few people can pull off purple. Roan could tell me I'm on a railroad. I would buy it. Yeah, Chay is sucking my tit on this rail right now. I would buy it. Yeah, Che is sucking high tit on us.

So confident. Che looks like he's going to a fucking... Che's playing dress up. The sweater ruins everything. The sweater's ruining everything. Che looks like he does jazz at a dive bar in West Village. Yeah, and Roan looks like he should be a logo for a very high-end lemonade brand.

You think Connor Griffin just got him some expensive shoes he'll never give back? Yes. Oh, he's cleaning them. Yeah, Connor just got a new pair of shoes. Connor's sneakers are still sneakers. They're close enough to dress. I think Big Cat would be fine. I don't think they're going to be like, if they're all coming in rolling,

if they're going in like that, they're not going to be like, whoa, what's the whole outfit? It's also 2.30 on a Wednesday. Yeah. And the hats are distracting. Didn't this reservation, they had to book it like two months in advance?

What time is the reservation? Yeah, what time is it? I'm getting nervous for them. It takes a while to get up there. Isn't it uptown on West Side? Is it uptown? I don't know. Where is it?

I thought it was like near Lincoln Center for some reason. I don't know. I don't know. What are you looking I thought it was near Lincoln Center for some reason. I don't know. I don't know. What are you looking at? I'm looking at SAS. I know. I was confused. I was very confused by that as well.

You disappear the closer it gets. Oh, there you are. All right. Okay. All right. Nice. So you're streaming college basketball tonight, huh? Yeah. You're coming? I might. All right. I. So you're streaming college basketball tonight, huh? Yeah, you're coming?

I might. All right. I got AEW tonight. Whoa. How much does the room care about March Madness? I'm curious about that. Tremendously. I know the room being basically like everyone but Brandon.

It says they close at 2.30. Oh, no. Let them go. Yeah. Literally, it says they close at 2.30. Oh, no. Let them go. Yeah. Yeah. Literally, it says they close at 2.30 and they open up again at 5. That's probably the best case scenario. Oh, right.

I hope that's it. I'm not going to tell them. No. Holy shit. You think that's real? It says closing soon. Yeah. No, that's probably real.

Monday through Thursday, they close at 2.30. But they made a reservation. Well, that's probably why that was the only time they could give was because it was closed. Yeah. The restaurant was like, yeah, we got a lot of tables.

We didn't have chefs. I mean, look at the website. I don't follow the regular season, but go crazy for March match. You do? You don't have to patronize me if you're like, I won't watch it.

It's the 64-man bracket, the team bracket that is the most beautiful thing. The only regular season basketball I watch is West Virginia. Yeah. I like March Madness. Bouncing those balls. You've got a bracket?

Yeah, I do a bracket. You do? Okay. That's good enough. I'll take that. Normally Villanova lady. Okay. I got UCLA this year.

Not a good year. I like that pick. Fordham's looking okay. This could be their year. Have them go all the way. Okay. Yeah, this says everywhere that they close at 2. Why aren't they leaving?

I'm going to call them up. It's making me nervous. I feel like they're pulling a prank on us. Open Table says they close at 2.30. Can you call the restaurant right now? Can we call them? I think Kyle's doing that. That's going to be nuts if they go and it's just closed.

Oh, and they're all dressed up. Some other restaurants around there. They'll get to go eat somewhere. Maybe that's been their plan the whole time. Maybe I wasn't supposed to say that. Maybe they'll pick a bad restaurant. Thank you for calling La Verna Den. You're afraid to dox them, Kyle?

Hi, are you guys open right now? We are for lunch until about 2.30. And then you close? We don't take any more reservations after that until about 5 or so. But if you had reservations already, you can still dine within that time period? Not between the hours. We take our last reservation at 2.30. Okay, sorry. Bye, Dan.

Have fun. Sorry. Thank you. Have fun. Bring us something back. Have a blast. See you guys in 15. Dallas. Dallas. Alright. So Stephen set

this whole thing up, so you can fuck it up. They're taking it back. One last set this whole thing up. So he fucked it up completely. They're taking it back. All right, yeah. One last pick with a big date. Stephen fucked it up completely. It's just like waving goodbye to the people on the Titanic. They even look like them. This is insane.

Wait, wait, wait. Time out. They already have a reservation, though. But this makes no sense. What she said was they're closing. Yeah, they're not. I was confused by that, too. How did they get their reservation time?

Steven must have fucked it up. 2.30? Did he make the reservation when he was in Phoenix? No, I think 2.30. That would be the best thing ever. I don't think that would be it. That would be 4.30 here and they would still be closed. Also, it takes 20 minutes to drive there.

Yeah, they're fucked. So he's got to think their reservations are at 3, right? There's no way they'll get there in 10 minutes. What time are their reservations? Yeah, I would guess there's no way they'll get there in 10 minutes. Unless it's not where I think it is. No, it is. It's like close to Central

Park. Are they lying to us? I think they might be lying. They might be going somewhere else. They're lying. They never made a reservation. They're fucking with us. If they left right now...

This is saying 25 minutes. Steven Chey's not capable of pulling off a lie that long. But maybe he was like, we're not going to be able to get a reservation. What's the lie, though? Where are they going if not?

I don't know. Big Cat wouldn't have switched his shoes and everything if they weren't going there. This has Roan written all over it. Oh, it was Roan's idea originally. Roan didn't set it up. Jay set it up. Is there a world where someone in that group is pranking? Roan.

Yeah, or someone is getting pranked by the rest of the group or something. It would be Roan pranking everyone else. Jay could be getting pranked, and Nate could always be getting pranked by the rest of the group or something. It would be Roan pranking everyone else. Jay could be getting pranked, and Nate could always be getting pranked. Yeah, this is a perfect group. Big Cat could be getting pranked, but will join the pranked side. Yeah, he's getting pranked, but he's like, I actually was in on this the whole time. So their lunch is only 12 p.m. to 30 and then dinner's 5 15 to 10 so it

sounds like they don't take reservations until 5 30 right yeah they don't want you to come eat there and friday to saturday it's only open 5 15 to 11 p.m and they're not even arriving until it's it might get there like three yeah my thing just said it'll take at least 25 minutes. So they're not even getting there till it's for sure. The door is going to be closed. Lights off. Only the chef is going to be in the back. Yeah. Yak fans want to snitch to him.

I know. Don't see. Yeah. What's too late? That's true. Forgot we were live. Yeah. Sometimes you forget.

I mean, now I'm so curious to know if they know and they're fucking with us. They know. They're just going to fucking Smith or some shit. They all dressed up. What if they have it set up like it's closed, yeah, but they have a private meal? Oh, this is how they leave. That's the Chicago yak. They're all going to the airport.

They're going to JFK. Fuck. They're not going to the airport With JFK Fuck They're not coming back They're dressed for that TWA lounge That 1920s Oh man That was a good run Alright boys that was fun

Fuck I really I kind of want to stay going Until they I know It shouldn't be long No Titus you want to play Family Feud? Yeah I'll play.

Yeah, I'm a guy who gets it, right? Oh, totally. The more you say it. Wait. Come on, me, I get it. Yeah, I think that's worst case scenario, Brandon, is that they knew the restaurant was closed, but they're swinging a big dick, and they're like,

yeah, we know it was closed. That's the whole reason we got in at 2.30. They shut down the whole restaurant for just us. Yeah, I don't put that past Jay. They're going to come back puffing their chest about how, like, we got a private dinner at, yeah. Jeez. That would be the worst case scenario.

I think worst case scenario is that they were never going there and I just spoiled the entire thing. And now they're going to get. What would you have spoiled? Just that they're not eating? They're not going to La Bernardin or whatever it's called. So they're going somewhere. Probably going to fucking Triple Crown. They're going to have so much fun.

Yeah, they're probably going right across the street. You're going to have one beer and then come back to the office. All right. Whoa, 500 new questions. Brandon's going. He's not coming back either. Brandon's going to help me pay the Triple Crown. You guys aren't actually going to Chicago right now, are you? Yeah, he's probably. I know Brandon. He's not coming back either. Brandon's going to help me to the Triple Crown. You guys aren't actually going to Chicago right now, are you?

Yeah, he's probably. I know Brandon. He's freaking out. Well, Dan promised. Well, Dan promised me. I'm moving my whole family out there. He promised me a studio. Name something a person

uses to wipe their mouth with. Napkin, right? Yeah, napkin. Right, he gets it. He gets it. Yeah, you do. Right, he gets it. He gets it. Yeah, you do. Yeah. Oh!

Let's go. Wow. Hand? Hand, yeah. What about a kerchief? Inside of the sweatshirt? Oh, sleeve is a good one. Sleeve is there.

We already got it. Already guessed. Oh, yeah. I was thinking. Oh, a hand. Did you try hand? Handkerchief. Handkerchief. We tried hand. We already got it. Oh, a hand. Did you try hand? Anchorchief. Anchorchief.

We tried hand. Towel. Voice. Uh-oh. That's a tough one. There it is. Anchorchief. Table cloth.

I was going to say barnyard material. Yeah. Maybe someone would do that. No. Washcloth, a towel. Oh, yeah, washcloth. Washcloth, tissue. Paper towel.

Be all straightforward. Yeah, I guess that was easy. Riley do. Shit. Dang. What is it about Family Feud that when they show you the answers, you have to say it out loud? Yeah.

Ah, paper to paper. Automatic. Name something that might get rained out. Baseball game. A wedding? Ooh. Maybe. Good luck. Parade. D luck. Parade.

Dumb. Parade. Oh, yeah, rain on the parade. A picnic. Good one. Not really. There you go. What's one more thing that would get rained out?

A concert. Ah. Well, it's not. No? Yeah! Perfect round. Damn damn we're filthy whoo crushed her round three

we asked a hundred women you know it's going to be a bad date if instead of a car they arrive riding a... Bike? Show me bike. There you go. Horse? That'd be a great date, though. That'd be a sexy date. Skateboard.

Skateboard. A... School bus. Yeah, bus. Yeah, a bus. Another man. A bus or a horse would be cool. Another man. No.

This is just like shaming poor people. Yeah. A rickshaw. Scooter. Oh, scooters is probably one. There you go. I don't know how Scooter is motorcycle session. That's another form of transportation, I guess.

I don't trust these boys for a second. Trucker, we're fine. Yeah, that's fine. The Yak just deleted the tweet of them of their picture who's running that who did that gotta be tj or shay are you connor wait wait whoa whoa i just stole some shoes and now lead at the group pick wait wait wait something's amiss people were in the replies saying big cat just had a yak fan called and tried to cancel our reservation wait what that big cat just said that.

No, they're just adding more details. Yeah. They don't have to. Oh, they're not going! Oh, man! The props are them! Hopefully they have fun. Where are they going, then?

No, they just had a Yak fan called and tried to cancel our reservation. That's... Oh. No, I think they're using that. They know it's not open. Yeah. Except Che Exactly Che's got no idea

If it's a prank on Che Then props Where would they go? Hmm Interesting No We're missing out on something And I hate it

I know Should we stay on Until we get a result? No, we're missing out on something, and I hate it. I know. Should we stay on until we get a result? I don't know. What's chat saying? What's chat want? What's chat want? The mercy of chat.

What does the chat say? Very clever, Brandon. I don't like the way he said that riff on what does the Fox say oh I haven't said it in the same rhythm that was nice so what else is new with you guys I got a I got a I got a so last night I was at the bodega across the street From my apartment

It was about 11.30pm Wanted to pick up a Gatorade and a seltzer water And Three men walk into the bodega All wearing ski masks All you can see is their eyes There's a dude waiting in line They go up and they say

Hey do you have any money He turns around and gives them all of the money that he has, and they leave. I was horrified as soon as I saw them walk in. Because I'm like, what the fuck? Why are they all wearing ski masks? They consensually robbed the dude. Was that something that you guys would instantly be like, what the fuck? Yes. Wait, wait, wait. Who did they get the money from? There was a dude waiting in line to check out wasn't part of their group wasn't part

of their group they go hey do you have any money they surround him and then the guy's like yeah and he just gives them their money and they leave i think that's the best way to get robbed robbing i've ever seen but i don't know if that's a consensual rob then i go but then i go up to the cash register and the dude doesn't say anything. I thought he was going to be calling the cops or some shit. He doesn't say anything. Then I'm starting to feel insane. What did the guy do after he gave them the money and they left?

Bought his stuff and left. He continued to buy. He didn't bring it up at all. He didn't turn to you. Looks like he didn't speak or anything and then he just left. They probably knew each other. It was some type of date and transaction. They didn't look

like their crews aligned. Their crews did not align. He was wearing head-to-toe pastels. He gave them not all of his masks. How much money do you think he gave them? I turned around so I saw them. I'm walking into the bodega and I see them turn the corner.

And instantly I got a little freaked out because it's like pitch black out. Three dudes wearing ski masks. Yeah. I walk into the bodega, go over. I'm like, oh, whatever. Like not really thinking about it. And then I turn. You see them go in.

I saw them. But you also go in. No, no, no. So they are on the street outside of it. But it looked like they were passing it. So I like didn't think anything of it. Went into the store. I'm at like the drink thing at the refrigerator. Turn to the right. I see them all

in the store, and they're surrounding this dude, and he gives them all their cash. He gives them his cash. There was no weapon brandished? I did not see a weapon. Did he look fancier than everyone else in the store? Yes. So they probably followed him for a block, waiting for him to go somewhere, store? Yes. So they probably followed him for like a block waiting for him to go somewhere maybe? Maybe. Huh.

Then I saw them at the pizza place across the street and I took the long way home. Him or them? Them. They robbed the guy and then just went right across the street to the pizza place? It's pizza time. So were the ski masks up or were they eating in ski masks?

I only saw their figures. Where are the closest slopes to downtown Manhattan? This is fashion. They're just getting off of the urban fashion now. This was not urban fashion. Three dudes wearing ski masks. I pray ski, though.

Like, were they just... Could be. It's maybe... They weren't. And then I downloaded the Citizen app to see if anyone said anything. That thing doesn't...

Is that even a thing anymore? You should be the last person in the world to have the Citizen app. All it said was, like, gas odor a mile away, and that's the only report I've gotten. Oh, dude, when I got it, it was just, like, multiple stabbings every 15 minutes. My buddy in L.A. lives in Hollywood and is obsessed with the Citizen app. It, like, has ruined his brain. Yes. He lives in, like, the shittiest part ofiest part of LA and he'll just send me

he's just like, dude, look at this. And he sends me a screenshot and it's just like all this shit going on in the Citizen app. My mom has it for my address and she'll just be like, Nick, have you seen a 5'8 black man? Yeah, like 300. That's when I lived in the Bronx

I was friends with this waitress who was fun like fun to go out and party with didn't think she was that crazy or anything she was going to art school here in the city and one night we had this group of friends I didn't go out that night but one night she's hammered drunk in the food truck line some guy says something to her she stabs him and then just

calmly walks across the street to the bodega gets a drink and sits crisscross applesauce on the sidewalk waiting for the cops to come. Oh, my God. She, like, just casually stabbed him, went across the street, bought a Gatorade, knew the cops were coming, and just waited. She's like, I know, I know. Apparently, she was, like, cool as a cucumber. And the guy was, like, pretty hurt. And she went to Rikers.

Yeah, she went to jail for that. Really? Yeah. What do you even, like, what would you do in that situation, though? Like, if so, if they gave away everything I have. Yeah. If you're the guy getting robbed,. Really? Yeah. What do you even, like, what would you do in that situation, though? Like, if so, if you're the guy getting robbed, you mean? Yeah. Yeah. I would do the same.

I'd just be like, yeah. I was trying to contemplate how I would handle a gun getting pulled on me. And I'd like to think I'd just be like, yeah, here, take all my money. But I don't have any money because I don't carry cash. So I was like, I don't know what I would do. I had a knife pulled on me when we were in Illinois? Southern Illinois? And I handled it better than I thought I would. I was shaken up

afterwards, but during I was just like, hey man. Did you give him your wallet? No, he wasn't trying to rob me. He was just trying to kill me. Oh! Was he just fucking with you, or did he have intent to hurt you? I can vouch. This was like a C spot. You were wearing all black, right?

No, no. I was dressed up like a colonial man. Oh, wow. He thought I worked for the Biden. That triggered him, yeah. Brandon, is that why you dress like an asshole all the time? You don't want to- Why are you doing this?

You don't want people to- You get some. You're walking on the street to- This guy gets it. I feel like you you be a target. Like if I saw someone wearing that blue pastel, I'd be like, I'm going to rob that. Yeah. This is a standard blue hoodie.

Blue pastel. With the kind of fancy shoes, too, I'd say. It's like a bandana material. It's gang affiliation. Yeah. If I had to pick. We're still wearing the same shoes. Yeah.

Well. So technically. I just got black and white because I'm not, you know, trying to. I're still wearing the same shoes. Yeah. Well. Not at all, actually. They're blazers. I just got black and white because I'm not, you know, trying to, I'm just trying to wear shoes. I'm not trying to, like, in someone's respect. Be a billboard, yeah. I'm just trying to protect my feet as I walk. He's not gay, is what he's got.

I just got to be me, brother. I chose black and white because I sleep with women. Yeah. Cool shoes, though. Thank you. Yeah. sleep with women. Cool shoes though. Thank you. Everyone here before Titus, before he got here, all of you like these shoes. I still do.

We've talked about these shoes before and you've all liked them. You went on a streak a whole week of a different cool pair of shoes. You love these shoes. What did I say they look like? The bags that middle-aged moms carry around? Bradley. Vera Bradley. Vera Bradley.

Looks like a little Vera Bradley bag shoes. That got us on a Longaberger basket kick, if I do recall. Yeah, yeah. Those are awesome. Do you still carry your blade? Yes. See, I was going to bring my blade today, but then I was like, I don't even know what I'm going to do with a blade and three dudes around me. So I'm on a quest. I want 200 knives this year.

You're not on pace. Guess what? The guys that listen to the podcast have started sending them to the office. You got one right before the show, right? I did, yes. Guys who try to get 200 knives, it always starts out fast, strong. The first 100 are the easiest, that's without a doubt. I'm on pace. Why is 200 the number, that's without a doubt. But I'm on pace. Why is 200 the number?

It's hard to do. 201 would be excessive, Brandon. That's too many knives. 190, not enough? Imagine this is Nick, he has 200 knives. Sick. That's Kyle, he only has 165 knives. That's one of my boys. Stuck in the 160s for years. Still isn't there.

I know. That's what I'm trying to do. I had my knife in the holster on my belt this morning walking around my apartment. We all have knives. I was like, maybe I should start wearing this around. Yeah. Because I got a good blade. Nice little wooden handle to it.

Probably not as good as my knife. This thing is sharp. All knives are. It's a city knife. It's too clean. What's your best knife? Probably my Spyderco. Do you practice like flipping them? It's not a toy. That's my problem. Mine

doesn't have the flip. Mine doesn't have the thing. I don't have like a switch blade but some of them have the little nub. You can like use your thumb and flick it I don't have that I got mailed one of those this morning

I'm afraid guys are gonna start sending me weapons that they've used I'm just getting my prints all over them but I got a cool one today from a fella I used to

when I would go hiking I'd wear a knife I had this someone gave it to me I don't know why but like a knife you strap around oh so cool

and it was super practical because like you know when you're out in the woods, shit just happens. I don't know. I'm not trying to fight off other hikers or whatever, but I would just carry it because, I don't know,

you hear enough horror stories, you're like, I don't want to roll my ankle and wish I had a knife to do so. So I would just carry it because what the hell better to be prepared or not? So you were carrying it as an amputee? Yeah, kind of.

I saw the James Franco movie. You had to cut your legs off by yourself boys an emergency trick i would say less than every percent of people that carry knives are using it for that reason i carry it because like every hiking story every horror story you hear it's like the doofus just didn't have like a very basic thing like if only he had a gallon of water he would not have died on that hike so i was like what the hell just take this knife and it'll look kind of badass to be honest i'm hiking in hawaii uh no tree there's like nothing it's just like a volcanic mountain of a thing i'm the only one i think i'm the only one um hiking very hot day no cover anything i'm just like alone bored and then one other guy

is coming down the mountain and he just goes sick knife bro and boom me and i've never worn the knife yeah he's sick knife bro me yeah because and i was like yeah i guess wait you were wearing shorts with the thing around your leg yeah because i oh yeah yeah that's it hey sick knife that's not as cool as i was in i was i did i didn't usually wear the shorts i i like when i'm usually hiking i would not but i was in in Hawaii. It was like a 100-degree day. I was bored. I was there for a wedding. One of my friends was getting married. I was there.

I was going stag to the wedding. So I was like, I have a free day. I'm just going to go do something. And I picked this hike, and it was really hot. So I just wore shorts. And I was like, yeah, fuck it. I'll take the knife. I don't know what the trail is like.

And then there's nothing on the trail. It's just like a hike up a volcanic mountain. And I thought there was nobody there. And then one guy coming down. The one other guy. One soul I saw on this hike was like, nice knife, bro. Like one for one on comp. That's rough.

It was bad. When I went hiking in Wyoming, I remember feeling like that. Like I feel like I should have had something because it was like completely remote. And then I remember we got towards the top. And this like couple stopped me and my friends and they were like, hey, just so you guys know, there's like a moose up there. Yeah.

Real close. And the girl just had like a fucking pistol just like in like her gym shorts. Yeah, I've gone to like Montana and Alaska and shit and that's happened. Like you see a huge fucking elk just like staring you down. And you're like, I mean, I don't know if a knife was going to save me from that.

At least it's something. At least it's something. At least it's something. I hold it up and I'm like, you better not. Yeah, but not anymore. Now, so if I go on a hike and I, you know, if they find my body in Montana or something, you'll be like, that's because he didn't have his knife. Because the guy wanted to wear shorts.

It was either pants. It was shame down. Pants or death. It cost him his life. Yeah. There you go. New update from the boys. I keep a broken off nine iron in the back of my car, just on the floor. And whenever the take care ladies pick my son up out of, because they'll come and do like drop off, they'll get him out of the car.

And I'm always wondering if they're wondering about that. They're just like sitting right there. What's the broken nine iron going to do? I always picture when I feel very vulnerable when I'm putting in the car seat and just something I can grab real quick and just stay the fuck away from me. Why not a fully intact nine-iron? Well, this one, the way it's broken off, the other end is crazy sharp. It's like shards of metal, so if I have to jab. Just a big, long knife.

Yeah. Those little baseball bats you buy at baseball games, are those just to keep in your car? I think I had one on my desk or some shit growing up. Yeah, I don't know any other purpose. You definitely can't play with them. They're just decorative. I'm a pepper spray lady too.

I have the big ass bear spray that I take because I go hiking alone with my son too and I'm like, if there's a crazy dog or a bear... You don't have to be hiking so much. I always feel like I'm going to be the one to do it the wrong way. Like no matter how many times you look at it I can just see. I feel like if you do it the wrong way

you're screwed. My sister has one that's just like sound based. Yeah. Oh it's really loud. Like that would affect you too. Yeah. I think that's good for like some animals though. I think it's just for like attention like if somebody comes up to you. Yeah. Good deterrent you can't even buy pepper spray in New York

you can't buy shit in New York no no can't buy I tried can't I think that would be I'd rather pepper spray someone

than have to stab them I don't think I don't feel like if I had to stab somebody it would shake me up a good bit yeah but I don't think anybody would fuck with you if they were just like oh that, that guy's a knife. Having to pull it out of the person?

Yeah. Give me that back. Have any of you been pepper sprayed? I have not. I just wasn't sure. Or tased. You had to be, right? Yeah, I was.

They may pepper spray you. They're a foot away from you, and they go, how many fingers am I holding up? So you open your eyes to tell them, and they're like a foot away from you and they go how many fingers am i holding up so you open your eyes to tell them and they're like right oh right across and then you have to do an obstacle course and like people are hitting you with like foam sticks and stuff like that you're just getting what what is the point of pepper spraying you i think it's because so then if you're in a situation where you have to pepper spray and the wind blows it back at you you already know what it feels like so you don't panic you just like stay calm if it ever happens again uh but it was genuinely fucking horror like it's it was very bad what do you do after just pour milk on your eyes and nothing works they made us walk

in a circle on a basketball court for like four hours and then it's oil-based so the next day when we pt like we went running it activated all over again so we're all like oh yeah um and the mucus i had like i swear to god i had boogers coming out of my nose that were dragging on the grass, still attached to my face. Oh, you should have just paid attention in high school. I know, I know, I know. And it was, if you look it up, pepper spray videos are some of my favorite. I feel like there's not a single scenario in war where that first of all you'd even get pepper spray. Are you getting pepper sprayed in war? There's so many

things in hindsight where I'm like that was so unnecessary like we did not have to do. Walking around with machine guns. What is the scenario where you're like That's a good point. That's gotta be worst case scenario if you're bringing out the pepper spray. Yeah.

Everything had to have gone wrong. I'm always confused by, maybe Kate, you can explain this to me, maybe this is controversial, I'm always confused by the idea of being a war criminal. In my mind, war is the most heinous thing ever. But the idea that you can take war like too far, like there are rules to war is like very confusing for my brain.

I never understood it. I just kind of nod along when you say like. Neither have I. Like you, we had to meet with the UN to get permission. To do whatever. Like you're like, they're not playing, they're not killing us fairly. Like that's like a very bizarre. It's insane there are rules.

Yeah. I know. It's a good thing. It's a good thing. I do like there are rules. Yeah. It's a good thing. It's a good thing. There are rules, but I'm just like... Yeah, yeah. I've never really understood that. What about when they're fighting terrorist groups? I'm assuming those guys aren't

playing by the rules. No, not at all. One guy's just like, whoa, I'm cool, man. We're gonna get in trouble, dude. What the fuck are you doing? The rules change all the time, too. Shut the fuck up. We're gonna get in trouble dude the rules change all the time shut the fuck up we're gonna get in trouble war just has like a ref no the bamboo out from the toenails war yeah uh i don't know it's always like the obviously i guess the the relevant would be

putin right now with like ukraine like yeah like he starts a war but then now he's gone too far because this is like and i'm like the whole fucking thing's too far right at what point i don't know it's always one side following rules it's like killing civilians a war crime yes biological weapons warfare biological weapons hurting someone who's already hurt. You're supposed to buy, like, they'll have to take care of them. You have to, like, accept prisoners, right? Well, if you shoot someone and they don't die, you can't shoot them again. Right, you have to take care of them. I feel like that's got to be the most fucking rule.

That's so weird. You don't have to, but if you come across them and they're injured, you wouldn't, like, go out of your way to run over there and get the people you just shot. So, like, when they were capturing, when they were killing Bin Laden, if they, like, shot him in the foot they'd be like, fuck. God damn it. We're criminals. It's over. We gotta help him now.

He's in an old book somewhere now. They had a flounder or a surgeon. Shot him in the foot. They have to heal him back to health and then set him free and then put him down again. We'll give you five minutes to get out of here. I want to see if the boys are there yet. Yeah, they make it.

They should be just about getting there. Are y'all there yet? That's how I talk. Hi, are y'all there yet? Are y'all there yet? It's easy. That was good. Oh, it works. Hi, are y'all there yet? Are y'all there yet? It's easy. That was good. Y'all works.

I never used y'all. Never was a y'all guy. I'm a y'all guy. I'm an ain't guy. How do you feel about non-southerners using y'all? I don't mind. You don't mind? I didn't know if it was... Y'all is for all of us.

Okay. It works. All right. Feel free to use it. I won't, but... I do like y'all. I feel like you could. Yeah, tell a story to come to the stream tonight.

It's not as easy as you think. I notice whenever someone- I'm far too educated. Well, I don't think that's really a parameter. I don't think that's a measure of education. Proper grammar isn't a measure of education? No, I don't think that's a measure of education. Proper grammar isn't a measure of education? I don't think so. I think there's plenty of people that talk loosely that are very educated and people that are very rigid with their talk are not educated.

That's probably what they did teach you in Mississippi. This guy does get it. He just comes and makes fun of Brandon Walker on the yak. That's how you do the yak. Figured out the key. They text back. They're not there. What are we doing?

We're across the street. We're fools. We're idiots. Yeah, let's wrap it up. Yeah, I guess. No, but wait. We can't have waited this long for nothing. Yeah, I think we can.

There's no guarantee they're getting there. Yeah, whatever they do, they do. There's still churros upstairs. I never go. You know, we're they're getting there. Yeah, whatever they do, they do. There's still churros upstairs. I never go. You know, we're doing a show tomorrow. Wait, what? We're doing a show tomorrow, too, that we can update people. This place is fancy.

Nope, he's lying. Proof. Proof. Wait, 2.40? They got there in 20 minutes. That doesn't check. My map's at 25. Yeah.

Who drove? So the restaurant's closed. Yeah, that raises some questions. Right, I don't... The fact that it's not open. I don't like this at all. There's also that small thing of... Yeah, let's go get churros.

Let's shut her down. All right, we'll be backros. Let's shut her down. All right. We'll be back tomorrow. That's a yak. That's a yak. It's a yak. It's a yak. It's a yak. It's a yak.

It's a yak. It's a yak. We'll see you next time.