The Yak - The Boys Get Rough N' Rowdy in the Studio | The Yak 8-16-23

Episode Date: August 16, 2023

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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. This is the Yak. Presented by Roback. Roback. Quarter Sips. Polo shirts. Hats. Just joggers.

Joggers. Joggers. The Quarter Zip. Their entire fleet of merchandise is elite. Uh, just joggers, joggers, uh, joggers, the quarter zip, the entire, the, their entire fleet of merchandise is elite. They have an elite fleet over at row back. You need to get some row back today. It's great for the outdoors. It's great for the indoors.

And if you have one foot in both, you'll still feel comfortable. Promo code yak row back.com 20% off through the rest of this week. R H O B A C K.com. off through the rest of this week r-h-o-b-a-c-k.com good ass deal incredible deal so good it made sass want to sing something oh no i'm not singing that let my people you walked in here singing that i was just i watched arty shafir's special and it plays at the end of it and it's been stuck in my head since then what was the beginning part of the song though? I only have ever heard the let my people go part

that's how it starts I think with let my people go? what are the other words? when Jesus was in it's when Israel was in Egypt's land let my people go we did a slaves unit in fourth grade and we all had to learn songs like people go. We did a slaves unit in fourth grade and we all had to learn

like songs like that. Excuse me? Yeah. Slaves unit? We did like half the year we just like learned a play about slavery for some reason.

I was like, this seems like a lot for... Is that something you dance and sing about? You know what I'm saying? That seems a little bit... Bro, Harriet Beecher Stowe

wrote Uncle Tom's Cabin and that's like a singing and dancing play. I feel like we can't. CJ, did you play a slave? I don't know if. He played a pharaoh. He played a slave owner.

We definitely wore all black, and I don't know what the premises of the play was, though. We definitely sung songs. What other actions were you doing? Was one whip cracked? I feel like we were like... Was there a whip prop? I feel like we might have been on the Underground Railroad. You played slaves?

I don't think it was ever explicitly said who the rules were. Well, if you were on the Underground Railroad, you could probably. Because they were the only people on there. Yeah. Yeah. There was no costermongers. There were no costermongers on the... I don't think so.

No haberdasheries off to the side. Not on the Underground Railroad, I don't think. Unless there were. Interesting. But wait, so you learned about all nationality slavery? Because obviously Moses, the Egyptians, and the Israelites have nothing to do with the Underground Railroad. I know that that song was part of it.

I think it was mostly an Underground Railroad-based unit. They probably were just singing the song as well, wanting them to let their people go. How was Ari's special? Good. I've seen it before. It's really good. Just wanted to just refresh yourself. Yeah. A little game tape. Yeah.

Thanks. No, I just scroll around YouTube and I just hop and listen to different things. For a whole hour, though? No, I skip around. Oh, got it. Matt McCusker's special whole hour, though? No, I skip around. Oh, got it. Matt McCusker's special was good, though? Yeah, it was very funny. Either of you guys watched that?

I would like to. Is it Speed of Light? I've only heard great things about this man, but never did a deep dive. He's very funny. Yeah, he nailed it. I wish I could watch it, but I packed my apartment too early. No TV, returned my internet, just boxes, nowhere to sit. I wish I could watch it, but I packed my apartment too early. No TV. Returned my internet.

Just boxes. Nowhere to sit. I got excited. For two weeks. Two weeks. That's like standing up during takeoff. Yeah, pretty much. I unbuckled when the wheels go up, yeah. What the fuck?

That is an insane move on your part. Thought I had more shit shit i'd expect nothing less from the guy who gets to the airport seven hours early dude i'm i'm the most punctual bitch you'll ever meet they they had to call my name on the loud the airport yeah they had to do that to me it was so embarrassing yeah were you where were you i was like running through the terminal oh really that late that happened to me and i was at the wrong gate. Oh, that's a nightmare situation. Did you miss the flight? No, I just walked to my gate.

Oh. They were calling my name over through the whole airport. Were you embarrassed as fuck? I was just like, I took my headphones off and I was like, did they just say my name? Did they just dox me? Yeah, you were probably so pissed. What the fuck? I mean, you're not expecting to hear your name amplified through an entire airport.

It's a visceral, weird feeling to hear. Those airport employees have to say the most complex of Chinese names. Oh, yeah. They must be pumped when they just see a Kyle Bauer on the list. Oh, they fist bump. No, they'll still fuck that up. Well, yeah, West Virginia, they could not say that. AU sound doesn't...

I'll buy. AUE, three vowels. French to them. Yeah, it could not say that during wrestling tournaments. A-U sound doesn't... I'll buy. A-U-E, three vowels. Yeah, that shit. French to them. Yeah, it does not hit. But they'll hit you with the... They'll say a Hispanic name perfectly. Oh, yeah.

They'll roll the ball. Maria Villalobos. They'll say that shit. They'll land that one fucking perfectly. I just witnessed that happening. But how do they pick who they call like i think it's if you're checked in like if you've gone through tsa but you're not at your gate like well the guy's in the airport where the fuck is like he checked in for the flight even if it's probably mobile yeah probably checked in for the flight where because

so they will wait for you it's not like they're just slamming doors sometimes they'll even keep it a little bit longer as you run through totally have you ever gotten to a uh gate the door is locked but you can still see your plane there oh no that sounds awful i've been the last person on a plane a few times that feels awesome yeah because the relief i mean who cares are you saying it feels kind of bad because everybody's looking at you like you held us up no it's just like when that happens it's usually extremely stressful getting there but the relief sprinted airport yeah i will never run in an airport i sprinted through jfk i would i would have loved to see that i had to take breaks because i was so out of my i was the last gate at jK, and I was already late. It's always the last gate.

Yeah, it's never – anytime you're late, you're never the first gate. You're the last gate in the whole airport. JFK is already – They're like four hours early. Play some Final Fantasy at the gate. Hell no. JFK is already as far as it can be. It's the farthest ends of the earth.

And now LaGuardia is is nicer now but it's way bigger it used to be like super condensed you could just walk to your gate in three steps now you are going to be going through four concourses to get there you should decide if you're going to get on the moving walkway or if you're going to go around it like you're going to be waiting behind people i don't mind because they have those signs that say this will be a five to seven minute walk for but if you're already late and you get that information you're like oh fuck yeah that's true can i make it four i mean dude i landed at jfk once and everyone started getting on this bus i was like how long is it if i just

walk and he's like it's gonna be like 25 minutes oh my god i'm like what the fuck dude dude that tyler miller just missed his flight from he was going to atlanta this past weekend to film some pap ev shit he got to the airport got to his terminal was just gonna make it in time but then Tyler Miller just missed his flight from, he was going to Atlanta this past weekend to film some Pat Bev shit. He got to the airport, got to his terminal, was just going to make it in time, but then he had to get on a bus to go across to a different terminal. Yeah, but nothing good has ever happened to Tyler. He's the most unlucky dude on earth. Yeah, it's true.

It's true. He's always getting fucked. Four people just moved in to hit his studio apartment with him. Yeah, he just got a studio in West Village, so it's tiny. And he has people living with him. Yeah, what do you mean? On his stove. Yeah, people are just stacked on top. How are people living with him?

Because it's the in-between time. Oh, like his brother and shit? His family, yeah. I was at the Reno airport, and it was a long TSA line. I was about two-thirds of the way through it. And this old guy just cuts everyone. He's running through like, where was I standing before I left? Wait, where was I?

I was in front of you. And yeah, it worked. That's such a fucking brutal move. I had to get out of line. I was waiting in the TSA line. I had to get out of line because my ticket said Nick and not Nicholas. And so I had to go change it. Oh, really?

Have you ever seen Dave Bargatze has a bit about that? He does have it. Yeah, but it was so funny. It happens. It's outrageous. He's like, ah, this isn't going to work. He's like, it says Nathan. Yeah.

I scanned my passport and made like a sound. I was like, oh, no. What's that? They're like, there's no Nicholas that has a sound. I was like, oh no. What's that? They were like, there's no Nicholas that has a ticket. This ID says you're 185 pounds. Wait, wait, this happened at Reno. My girlfriend couldn't get into the TSA line because I put her birthday wrong.

Oh! Oh no, Kyle. It was a quick fix. That's a fight. That's devastating. She hasn't forgiven you for that. Because you put her eye color in wrong. I get June and July, six and seven mixed up.

Yeah. Oh, yeah, when you have to write them down. So what is her birthday? Don't say it. Don't say it. You know it. I know you know it. I do know it.

Six, seven, and eight I fuck up. Constantly. My parents and my sister. Because you know it. I do know it. Six, seven, and eight I fuck up. Constantly. I know my parents and my sister. Because you never had to write them during school. Yeah, that's probably what it is. I know one through five, and then I know 9-11 and on. That's how it is. I'm like, oh, it's September 9.

Yeah. You guys seen Hard Knocks? You guys didn't watch Hard Knocks last night. I know. The guy was like, yeah, that shit's not going to happen until 9-11. And he was talking about the opening date, but they had specified that he wasn't talking about them fucking up the team. We're talking about the Jets. Yeah, the Jets until 9-11.

They had to really specify in the closed captions that he was not being. The Jets going to be good this year? Jets melting the Steelers at 9-11. Possible. That's not physically possible. Jets will get it. They're going to have 11 wins. You think they're going to have 11 wins?

Yeah, they're stacked. Alvin Cook. 17 games now, bro. KB. Fuck, yeah. You're on the 16-game drip. But yeah, they got Dalvin Cook, Brees Hall, and they had Michael Carter the year before that.

They just added Valdez Gantling and Nicole Hardman. Oh, no, Lazard and Garrett Wilson. And they already had Garrett Wilson. My entire life, I've never had a quarterback that you could be confident in. Pennington? No, he wasn't that level. Was he the best they've had in your lifetime? Yes.

They had people they were hopeful about, but they weren't confident. We were never truly confident with Pennington. Do you think handsome people get a longer leash with what? Sanchez was a good-looking guy. They get drafted higher, but they get Zach Wilson. I want an old rugged face. I think quarterbacks are inherently more handsome because they're confident enough to try out for quarterback.

Yeah, definitely. It's a genetic thing. You have to be genetically superior to be a quarterback. You can't keep your job as a quarterback just because you're handsome. Who? Who has been a very handsome elite quarterback? Jimmy G. Oh, a handsome elite.

You mean Brady? Do you consider Brady? Yeah. But he got buccal fat surgery. He's masculine handsome. Mark Sanchez is bachelor handsome. Okay. So Wilson's Bachelor handsome.

Would you say Zach Wilson is as well? He's cute as a button. He's like cute. Yeah. But he still would be on the Bachelor. He wouldn't win the Bachelor. You know what Zach Wilson looks like? Yeah, I do. He's cute as a fucking button. Totally. Yeah, he looks like a Pixar character. Yeah. He looks like he has squeaky cheeks.

I think we all just maybe I think their handsomeness is inflated because they're NFL quarterbacks. That's a thought. Now, have you seen Joe Burrow? Yeah. I don't think he's handsome. Oh, Joe Burrow's. You don't?

No. What? I fuck with that sass. You don't think he's handsome? He has something about him. You got something? Yeah, that's he's a quarterback. I don't think if anyone, if he was a normal dude and you saw him on the street, no one

would even flinch. I think they would. Oh, no one would even go, what the? Maybe I'm wrong. Oh, my. The skin fade with the Cartier glasses. What is he, 6'3"? 6'4"?

When did he get that haircut? When did he get the fucking TikTok haircut? He bossed up this off season. He bossed up? Is that bossing up? Which people are going to press here with it. Did you go on his downfall? Because he's, yeah.

Yeah, that's a little, I don't want, yeah, I'm going to pray on his downfall. Oh, I had no idea he bossed up. That's not what he looked like. TJ, what do you mean he bossed up? He got hot as hell? That's not what he looked like last season. He was white boy of the year last year, and he bossed up. Also, isn't he black as well?

All NFL quarterbacks are black. Okay. But I think black people claim to be. Not Zach Wilson. Not Zach Wilson. Not Mac Jones either. Oh. Mac Jones is the least black man alive. Might be. are black okay but i think black people not zach wilson not zach not mac jones either oh jones is the least black man alive might be yeah he's in the combo you're crying on the field but have you seen the picture of or the video of zach wilson with like a bunch of other first round picks and

he like fades into the background like homer simpson now tj is it possible to find that because i think that he might be the top, or yeah, top least black. That's not what Joe Burrow looked like last time I saw him. No, he's bossing. Have you heard, Harry? He's bossing up. Why did he get that dumbass haircut? Because he's bossing up.

They're going to go fucking 0-17 this year. Look at this. They start throwing signs, and he's, I gotta go. He looks 13. How old? He's younger. He looks 13. How old is he? He's younger. He looks younger than me. Those are probably the same age.

The way that he looks at them is... What are these fellas doing? What gang sign can I throw up? How old is he? Like 23, 24 probably. Jesus. Now he's already out of a starting job. Yeah, 24. 99. I don's already out of a starting job. Yeah, 24.

99. I don't see him winning on The Bachelor. I see him being possessive. Definitely. Though he did fuck one of his mom's friends. True. I don't know if that was confirmed. That was maybe a crazy report.

I think he kind of ran with that. Yeah, his agents were probably like, you need to make a story about him. You know who's low-key handsome is Jalen Hurts. Maybe not low-key, maybe high-key. I think he's just handsome. You also went from Wentz, who is a jump scare of a man. Right, that kind of disproves all your quarterback. But that's probably why he was Division I double A.

Only place he could get a job. No Division I place would offer him. He has the perfect physical talents for it, and then they scan up to his face. Poor guy. North Dakota, that's probably the ugliest state. Is it, though? Well, then what would you say is?

I don't think they mind. Well, then what would you say is... I don't think they mind. They wouldn't be offended by that. Like, Ohio, West Virginia, Mississippi is fat, but North Dakota residents destroy villages. Yeah. They're, like, lumpy. What's uglier, Seth? I'm trying to think.

I'm trying to think of places I've been. What was, like, Huntsville like? Not good. Although, yeah, I mean... No lookers in Huntsville like? Not good. No lookers in Huntsville. Of course, Mississippi is in the running. West Virginia is probably the ugliest. Yeah, I forgot. No.

No, it is. No. People think the incest shit is a joke. It's pretty rampant. Like south of Clarksburg. Yeah. It's pretty rampant. Like south of Clarksburg. Yeah. It's pretty rampant still. No, there's hotties in West Virginia. Yeah. I'm just thinking about the

Sean Payton left his wife for Miss West Virginia when he was Miss West Virginia? Yeah. Wait, when they were having training camp? When they were having training camp in the Greenbrier. The Saints had training camp in West Virginia. He left his wife for Miss West Virginia. He did? I think he's married to her now.

The Broncos might go 0-17 this year. They have real-time bad vibes on that team. The vibes are terrible. Russell Wilson was playing into the second quarter of the preseason game, throwing ducks, too. They might fucking suck. He's handsome, too. Wilson?

Yeah, I guess he scoops Sierra. Is Sierra still making music? Probably. I think folks don't stop making music. I think that they're just like waiting for a time or someone to put it out. Is Lloyd still making music? Lloyd Banks? Yeah.

He's gotta be. If you're a spitter, you're a spitter. You don't stop being a spitter. That's true. Like a Marine. Yeah, he's always a Marine. He's not a retired spitter. He's a current spitter.

He'll be a spitter until he dies. There's no such thing as a retired spitter? I don't know. I think they literally just die. I think spitters die. You die a spitter. I saw LL Cool J Just Drop some

He freestyled well For sway LL you did You did great LL What were you gonna say I was gonna try something Got some bars

Yeah I love LL Cool J That's what Zach Wilson Was talking to those guys about He's like You guys see LL freestyled well They throw gang signs That's what Zach Wilson was talking to those guys about. He's like, you guys see LL Freestyled Well? Dope gang signs.

Oh, man. We have good chemistry, boys. Oh, yeah. Thanks. The fuck? Did I ever thank you for feeding little Piper? Yeah, you did. He was so appreciative. You thanked him?

You did thank him? I think I did, yeah. She has been amazing since I returned. Like, super cuddly. What happened? You were looking at little Piper when he was away? When I returned, she's been better than ever. It's almost too good to be true. Little tiny Piper?

She probably misses her uncle. She probably misses Uncle Harry. Yeah, Aunt Harry. Aunt Harry? No, no, no. What were you guys doing together? You were scratching her like a dog. Yeah, Aunt Harry. Aunt Harry. No, no, no. What was Aunt Harry? What were you guys doing together? You were scratching her like a dog. Yeah, we just posted up for a little bit. That's what cats do. I sat on the beanbag chair.

That's probably what it was. But yeah, we had some fancy feast. You said you had one, three for Piper, one for me. One for me, three for Piper. That shit smelled so bad. Oh, dude, when I came home The litter box was full Dude I don't really know

I feel like mixing though Because you told me three cans doesn't matter what cans You mix three different cans You're mixing the pate with the gravy She loves the gravy She can't get enough of the gravy So did she eat it all? She was going to Munchtown straight away

She's a neater Did adding the gravy to the pate Make her eat the pate I don't know what he did I don't know what combo he used I don't really know what combo I did either She was pretty antsy though As soon as I dropped that first can

She went to eat and I was like Dinner's not fully served yet so why don't you fucking relax Have some manners one time But she probably thrives in that discipline. Totally. The dish wasn't complete. How much did you pay him? Nothing.

You just thanked him. It was a trade-off from when I stayed there. I see what you're doing and I've picked up on that too. That Kyle says thank? Thanked. Am I saying it wrong? Yeah.

No, I don't think you are. You're pronouncing it how it's pronounced. Yeah, I guess you're saying it correctly and we're saying it wrong. What do you wrong? Yeah. I don't think you are. You're pronouncing it how it's pronounced. Yeah, I guess you're saying it correctly, and we're saying it wrong. What do you say? Thank. Thank. This is soft. You're saying thank.

Thank? Yeah. Ugh. Yeah, I get it. I like that, though. I like it. It's so you. Thank.

Let's buy people a go. It's like van with a K at the end I know There's a few words I can't say Vegas bagel Mitty says Vegas the same way as you Vegas bagel Yeah, no, I think you're saying it right

Ben What, this week is flying by I know, it's sad Totally Dude, I have the distinct privilege of flying to Los Angeles tomorrow Ben This week is flying by I know it's sad Totally Dude I have the distinct privilege of flying to Los Angeles tomorrow Yeah that sucks so much In the morning And then flying out of Los Angeles tomorrow at night

You flew out to LA last week right for an interview Yeah Where'd you guys land The boss lady Oh Was she there Oh wait that's who it was She's actually in the office

Okay You flew to LA to have Erica on Was she there? Oh, wait, that's who it was? No, she's actually in the office. Okay. You flew to LA to have Erica on? Via Zoom. Wait, really? Crazy, man. That's what you did? That's nuts.

Did Rowan tell you guys about how he shit in his pants? Jesus Christ. Talked about it on Son of a Boy. Are we flaming you too much, man? No, no. Shit's been going bad. You flew out. You didn't tell me that. You flew out to L.A. to have Erica on and then came back and explosive diarrhea'd your pants.

That's an all-time bad. All in a day's work, baby. Yeah, it was. We had other guests that it all fell through. It's a fickle business. But, yeah, and I also did shit my pants. How did you, what did you eat? Elysian.

Elysian and airplane food and Delta Lounge food. You were on a plane in the airport where? I was flying back from Oakland. On the plane? No, he shit his the plane I shit my pants in my elevator as I got to my building after

so much better that's almost not shitting your pants was your wife home did you have to walk in with like the no okay

but she got home while I was still like moaning on the toilet and I was like and I like said it to her I was like I like

shit my pants like thinking it'd be like maybe like kind of like funny or like endearing like I was in massive pain but like I was like I like I like shit my pants like thinking it'd be like maybe like kind of like funny or like endearing like I was in massive pain but like I was like I thought that there it could be like kind of like we could laugh about it and she was disgusted did you throw away the trousers yeah it's on the garbage chute you gotta just throw those out the window yeah that's where it has to go be in the building Let someone outside take care of that.

No, I put them right on top of the garbage bag and threw that. That's crazy. Yeah. It was hell. Yeah. It was caked underneath the pieces of my ass cheeks. Yeah. You ever get shit on your finger when you're wiping accidentally?

And it'll put you in a state of disarray as soon as you see it. Yeah, you panic really badly. You panic badly. It's like a crazy panic. You panic badly. I don't panic at all. No, it's jarring to see. No, it's something about it.

It ain't right. It ain't natural. And I always forget what to do. You just have to clean it off with toilet paper. But then you've got to wash over and over and over. Yeah, like you're scrubbing the skin off you're scrubbing until you bleed that's i wonder what our brothers on this show who have none of them are here right now but brothers and sisters on the show who have children like obviously they're dealing with their children's shit all the time does that make them immune to their own shit

now i feel like kid poop's not as gross as adult poop. I think it's grosser, isn't it? Really? I think anyone else's shit is grosser than your own. What if it's your shit? Oh, I hate my own shit. I mean, their shit came out of your dick. It's like literally your seed. Yeah, true.

It's your shit. Yeah, in a way. Yeah, I guess you're right. Half of it. I kind of reached with that one. A little bit of a reach. But it's your seed. It's not exactly someone else.

It's like part you. Are you more or less, would you rather pick up your own shit off the ground or dog shit? Dogs. Dogs. I've picked up dog shit so many times. Why though? Why are we conditioned that way? Because I just had to.

My mom made me. No, no. But why are we more grossed out by our own? Because the dog shit, it sits outside and then it loses that stench after a while, and then you're pretty much just picking up logs. What if it was inside? Sometimes you'll get a bad one. Yeah.

And you'll be like, oh. You'll be gagging. That's exactly what I'm like. Yeah. That's a rough time. The dog has a bad one. Or if it's a really hot summer day, that's a bad one. Have you ever seen somebody walking their dog in New Yorkork trying to pick up like dog diarrhea off the greats

off the greats is giving them a pass i was like you're let it go yeah someone will step in that slip and crack their head open and sue the city you're good i walked when i was in denver a couple years ago i walked my friend's St. Bernard dog. There's a monster poop. Dude, it was the size of a football. Yeah. It was the biggest shit I've ever seen in my entire life. What was your reaction when you saw it?

I was just like, this is fucking crazy. There's something deeply disturbing about poops that are tapered on the ends and very wide in the middle. Oh, yeah. Because you just really think about the... Your innards. The mold of your innards. The really disturbing one is when you get one that does not disconnect at any point

and it's like three feet long. Yeah, I don't like the length. And you're like, what was that going all the way up into my fucking esophagus? That was a little gay of me. Yeah. Caleb, there was a time after he got his stomach surgery that he was sending like

just completely unchained melodies dude it was fucking I've never seen anything like that dude it was all just man people got interesting bowels and I didn't realize how regular mine were

until I shit myself but yeah I get to relive that experience and fly out to LA tomorrow for some more interviews. You flying D1? I better be. No, I don't know. I don't think so. But I am very close to it. I'm going to get platinum mic fucking this week, bro.

I'm on that ass. I'm inching towards gold. Really? Yeah. How? I guess Alaskaing towards gold. Really? Yeah. How? I guess Alaska and back will do it. Fuck. Sass, you're never going to get it.

I fly all the time, and I'm still not at silver. I did Alaska and back, and then London and back. Oh, yeah. Are you not getting your points? You're just probably not getting your points. No, I'm pretty much one flight away from silver. Oh, you're good then. How hard is it to get?

Once you get silver, is that the hardest one to get? I don't know. How long does it take to get to gold? I don't really check it too often. It's the easiest one to get? It's the first level. There's no way I'm going to get platinum. Platinum, it'll take years.

How did you get platinum? I don't understand how you got platinum. Roan's never on the ground. I know, but I feel like I fly every week. Some pilots aren't. Roan's been doing the ground. I know, but I feel like I fly every week. Some pilots aren't flying. Roan's been doing this for like two decades. But I thought

it only mattered the year that it's in right now. I don't know. I think I'm on like a hyper, I'm on an ultralight beam right now. I'm in a god dream right now.

That's crazy. It's a ton. But so, I'm flying back tomorrow night to Detroit overnight. Okay. And then in the morning flying to Pittsburgh for rough and rowdy. Then taking the drive to Wheeling for rough and rowdy.

It feels like you should just go straight to rough and rowdy. There's no flights from Los Angeles to Pittsburgh on Delta Direct. I need my Delta points. Are there any flights from Pittsburgh to LA? There probably are somewhere. No, I think there's one that lays over in Dallas. Why don't you just land in Philly and fly to Pittsburgh? It's like the same thing as landing in Detroit and flying to Pittsburgh.

Yeah, I guess that makes sense. But it's worth it for Ruffin Rowdy. This Ruffin Rowdy is going to be the one. I feel like this is going to be an historic Ruffin Rowdy. Marty yesterday got me pumped up for just one match and that's just one match. Can we add another bet today? Do we have any additional

information on these fighters? I missed the show yesterday. What happened? We have our own fight that we're betting on. We have a yak fight. Oh, okay. We chose the two funniest names. Well, honestly, we only got through six names And there can't be funnier names than this

We got through the five main events And then this was the sixth fight on the card That we saw And really didn't have to dig any farther Dude's name is The Popular Daz I don't think you're listening I would bet not Oh by the way Out of Order comes out tonight

I was trying to figure something out about that. Out of Order is going to be great. I just watched it. It's hilarious. But can I reiterate, this dude's name is The Popular. Popular. Yeah, that's a good-ass name. What does that mean? It means he's the popular. Yeah, that's

context clues here, guys. Popular is a... I like Wheels of Death, though. I think that's your winner. You're on. You're on Team Wheels of Death with me. Oh, good, because he's going to win. Right? Or do you have sass?

I forget. Popular is an adjective. 5'10", or 5... Yeah, 5'10", 2'10", is meaty. Meaty. So for Wheels of Death, it's myself, Che, Nick, and sass. All right. That's our team, Sass.

Fuck yeah. Winners eat steak off the loser's body. Winner eats steak off the loser's body. Oh, okay. Interesting. Worse for the winner. Yeah. By far.

Yeah. I don't want to eat steak off of one of your bodies. Right. It's disgusting. It's a lose-lose. We fucked it up. I don't want to get steak-y. Well, I mean, one of the people could be Kyle, though.

Yeah, my God. A stink off Kyle's body would be kind of a... Sweaty. That would be easy as hell. Would you sweat on purpose just to make it harder on them? No, I can't control it. Just unleash some sweat on them just to make it slick. But we have more information, I think, on the popular.

Yes. So, Wheels of Death. He's from Ohio, right on the border wheels of death. He's from Ohio, right on the border of West Virginia. He's a truck driver. He likes doing MMA. And then the popular is from Pennsylvania, near Pittsburgh.

He's a cement mixer and his training is unknown. And we have a video from them also. Okay. I feel like if you're mixing cement, you don't really need any training. Rob Rowdy. This is Joe Wheeler. Joe Wheeler, August 18th.

You get the opportunity in your lifetime to step in the ring with the popular Tommy Penland. Coming for Tommy Penguin. Whatever, it's just not that important. I think the popular may have lied about his weight. Look how tiny. Sending the lamb to slaughter here. Is that the popular? That is.

He's going to get demolished. August 18th, Wheeling, West Virginia. See you then. And He's going to get demolished. He's swaggy. Those guys have the Riz Mowbray Wazoo swag. That was electric. He had Fezco swag. He did look like him. R.I.P.

Yeah, but they were speaking like Microsoft Sam, dude. You think it's hard for some of these guys to get into the anger aspect of a fight? Those guys are always pissed off. You think? They are extraordinarily nervous and wish there was mutual respect between the two. Yeah, makes sense. It used to be Christmas.

They're not talking to each other. Oh yeah, that is tough. It used to be Chris Smith. They're not talking to each other. Oh yeah, that is tough. It used to be Chris Smith being like don't you think he's a big pussy? Don't you think he's a little bitch? Why don't you say he's a little bitch? Yeah, he's a little bitch.

Yeah. Coward fights would be an incredible brand. Bro, we would be an incredible brand. Bro, we should have a coward fight. Get Devlin on the line. Devlin, we need two cowards. Coward is hilarious. Fucking coward.

Robert Ford fighting. The Robert Ford belt. Fucking coward. They used to throw around that word coward and it used to mean something now we're all cowards it's kind of nice yeah we are are you guys killing a cockroach just like that no problem not just like that like no fear in your heart you just like walk up to a cockroach like that you don't even like there's plenty of fear i don't want it to move the sound every contents of it there's too much innards how about you i just gassed mine some raid raid yeah i guess that's the best way to do

it but that is a coward's way to do it anyway to prevent cockroaches it just doesn't work though and if you spray raid directly on a cockroach, they gotta die instantly. Oh, yeah. That's a coward's... But, I mean, that's not the bravest way to kill a cockroach. What's the bravest way to kill a cockroach? Light it on fire? No, you fucking use your hand

to kill it. Yeah, just your hand. Or like a tissue and you squish it to death. I break the neck. Yeah, fuck that. He's going to get some raid. Going like Arnold Schwarzenegger behind it and just fucking crack its neck. Did that work? I'll report behind him. As a wrestling guy, do you think that could work?

You know how Arnold Schwarzenegger in movies would just kill people by snapping their neck? That works. Would you do that? I wouldn't. I don't know that territory of chokes. people by like snapping their neck. That works. Would you do that? Would a man be strong enough to just do that? I don't know that territory of chokes. So what's, do we have a problem?

Oh, just grabbing a, just grabbing a charger. Grabbing a charger. Alright, say less. I thought there was an audio problem. That would have been a bummer. But you have to buy

this rough and rowdy fight. I kind of want to find another, I want to find another fight to care about and root for because that was... Yeah, we didn't even get through the whole lineup. I feel like I have a bandwidth to care a little bit more about fights or just to pick one to be really emotionally invested in.

I'll probably know one of these other fighters. You think so? Yeah. A wrestler from the Ohio Valley, there's got to be one. Let's see. Yeah. You got the cards, TJ? Each.

Young Teej. As you do that, I can talk. Oh, here we go. Have any of these fighters bossed up in the last year? Maybe Machete. Machete looks like she has. A lot of these guys are new, but I think Diamond Hands is the biggest boss up on this card, if you ask me.

He's like a hockey fighter. There's some hockey brawling league where they fight on ice, and then he came and started fighting on land. Whoa. He's been pretty good. Got to be easier to fight on land. Pretty Boy. Can we zoom in on Pretty Boy?

Get this town's red out. Then there's Butter Beach. Barnesville. That's where the Pumpkin Festival is. Yeah. They have some stud wrestlers. I don't know him, though. I think Cameron.

Cameron, West Virginia. Another tiny, tiny town tucked away in Marshall County with a vast history of very good wrestling. I don't know. They don't have the names up, though. This is one of the more ironic, both Butterbean you think of as a fat guy and Pretty Boy you think of as a hot guy.

Yeah. They kind of did Pretty Boy with... They did him dirty on that Photoshop. The outline of him. That's hot in Cameron. That's the prom king. Oh, you think he actually is Pretty Boy in Cameron? Definitely.

There's four last names in Cameron. One of them's Boy. All right. The Prophet. Against Turbo. Against Turbo. Against Turbo. Oh, shit. Prophet's an old 34.

Prophet looks... He looks decades older than Turbo. He looks like an actual Prophet. A biblical Prophet. Because that's like the Moses headband. Turbo was gonna get

his ass destroyed. By the Prophet? Yeah. Yeah. No, that's Zach Wilson. Dude, the prophet has probably been beating the shit out of... Every day. Every day for the last 34

years. He lied about his age. He definitely did. He probably can't feel pain. Crusher versus the killer. From... Wait, go back. What are the towns that they're from? Mineral Wells is another Parkersburg South school district, one of the best wrestling areas in the Ohio Valley in West Virginia.

Can we go back to that real quick? I just want to see. And then Portsmouth. Portsmouth? Yeah, it's way down south. I don't know that. I've been there once. 5'9", 208.

That's steel. The killer. 5'9". Huh. She does not look 208. 5'9", 208. She's probably mastered the... Yeah, what the hell?

I don't think she's 208. Where is that weight? She must have a massive ass. Yeah. A big, juicy ass. Everything south of that has to be elephant. We have a video for her. It's an upper body of like a 120 pound.

Yeah, where is the fucking other 100? She's 5'9", though. I don't know. Still, though. She's 208. She did not look 208. No. Something has to happen at where they cropped that photo.

Some women are masters of the pose, though. Maybe legs. Maybe she's got some big quads. All right, boys. She might see this. You're saying this. I know, and I regret it, and I take it back. You can't take it back.

What the fuck? I take it back, too. I just take it back. I take it back, too. Just take it back. No takebacks. No takebacks. I take it back.

No takebacks. You said fucked up shit, man. I just take it back. I take it back, too. Just take it back. No take backs. No take backs. I take it back. No take backs. You said fucked up shit, man. I was saying that she probably has a big ass. That's fucked up. How is that fucked up? No, that's desirable. Tired of magazines saying fat butts are the thing. All right, so let's keep on looking through.

This is, I'm enjoying myself. White. Healthcare hero from King of Prussia, Pennsylvania versus white steel. AOP is a hotbed of wrestling. Where's White Steel from? Guys, they don't have White Steel listed. It's like 125. Is he just like sitting in his truck?

Woodsfield? Is he like sitting in his truck? Oh, that's Monroe County. I know. Monroe City. There's no fucking way that that dude's 298. They don't have that. Oh, shit.

What the fuck is this? He's 6'4". Jesus. He has to have the biggest cock in the world. He's not 300 pounds. That's not the body of a 300-pound man. I kind of disagree. Look at that. He looks how wide it is.

300 pounds? His neck, though. He has a slim man's neck. Yeah, his neck is tiny. He doesn't have the same neck. That he's 300 pounds. I mean, why not? He's probably just, he probably moves like an offensive lineman.

He weighs 10 more pounds than White Steel? Hell no. Look at White Steel. He couldn't even stand up for the photo. You think he weighs 10 less? He's sitting like he was getting his portrait painted. I don't want to stand. That's crazy.

Can we see full body of these guys? I don't have any. Okay, 50 Cal from Bethesda, Ohio versus Hands of Stone from Mineral Wells, West Virginia. Yeah, Mineral Wells. He's a light boy. Warriors, Bethesda's a union local. No, no.

So you're taking Hands of Stone here? Absolutely. 50 Cal is a strong gun. I like that name. I do too. God's work. This is Brooklyn. Wait, didn't Brooklyn just have another name?

Brooklyn was Baby Machete. She's a double entry. Are we getting duped right now? Someone's fucking with us. Wait, they both got different names? She's fighting twice. They both are the same person. No, they must have

fucked this up. They must have fucked up the photos. I hope they're fighting twice. Which one's which? I like God's work and Brooklyn's name is a little bit better for both of these works.

Yeah, those are good names. Let's check the card. Where are they from? Where are they from? Brooklyn, I'd imagine, is from New York. But I could be wrong.

So I guess this is the real Baby Machete in Broadway, Gabriella. Okay, so that's Pretty Girl. Did that shit happen to me?

If you don't know me, I go by the name of Baby Machete. Listen, your name is dumb as hell. I'm not even gonna lie to you. Stupid. I've had so much fucked up shit happen to me that I'm still... Yeah, your name is dumb as hell. I'm not even going to lie to you. Stupid. I've had so much fucked up shit happen to me.

Yeah, you did. I belong. I'm not fired. You certainly did, honey. Holy shit. I'm not uncomfortable looking at this. Like someone called Cherry Bomb. And I'm going to be honest with you.

I looked at your Facebook and your TikTok. I don't have to talk any trash. I've seen enough. I'm good. I am ready. All right. Oh, man, I would not step in the ring with her. With Baby Machete?

No. I'm Baby Machete. Good God. That was dope. Is she going to be painted up for the... I don't know. It feels like that's got to be illegal. She's definitely coming out to Daisy Halls.

In like a dress. Oh my God. That's something. She's going to get her ass kicked. Oh yeah. Baby machete. Brooklyn? Brooklyn wasn't even there for the shit talk. No.

He's horrifying. That's why they fucked up. They couldn't, they were just like, I don't want to work on this graphic. Should we bet on that fight? Baby Machete? Versus,

who was she fighting? Brooklyn. No, I thought Brooklyn was fighting God's work. So, Baby Machete's fighting... They both have two. Oh, Broadway Gabriella. We should get Brooklyn against Broadway Gabriella.

A little Subway series. Baby Machete should just be fighting herself in the ring. Fighting her demons. Her demons. She has to sit there in silence. She would tap out in two seconds. Yeah, she would lose. The lights all go out in the arena.

She's just like standing on top of the jumbo truck. Oh my god. Lights turn off. Dave's gone. Yeah. Rowan's going to go interview her. She's going to bite out your Adam's apple. Just like floats out of the arena.

Thank you for having me. Can you do the demon voice? Thank you for having me. Wheeling, you've been amazing. All right. So should we bet on that one? Yeah, we definitely should. Yeah. What's the bet?

Like, do some people have to be on one side or can we all be on... I don't know if I want to be on her side, but if I'm against her, she's going to damn us into a little hellfire.

I think she's going to get wrecked. Yeah, those types of girls do. You've met a lot of girls like that? Yes. On Tumblr. A ton. Oh, man. Those girls. And where was she from? West Virginia?

Yeah, that will play a fact. She was from the River Sticks, dude. She's from Darien, Connecticut. The River Sticks, that's Hannibal. What the hell is up with Baby Machete? First off, Devlin, why do you look like you look incredible?

You look incredible, dude. You had a clean shave there, too. Clean shave. Lined up. Shoulders, pecs. Somebody learned to love themselves. All thanks to Dr. Nick Fox. What the hell is up with Baby Machete? Can't stop watching. Baby Machete, Cherry Bomb's niece.

So she's got the pedigree uh she has been a ring girl before okay and she's just a country girl from west virginia by ring girl do you mean from the film she's freaking us out man west for west virginia that's not that crazy yeah but i think that that kind of girl, it means a little more when she's from West Virginia and she acts like that. Like if a girl is from a big city acting like that or the suburbs, she's rebelling against her parents.

Like this girl is like... She's just doing it for fun. Cherry Bomb's niece and Haiti's uncle. Like it's bad news, bro. Yeah, the girl she's fighting is like a pure city girl. Yeah. We got a Tennessee, West Virginia. This girl goes out on Broadway and drinks martinis.

But this girl is from New York? No, no, Tennessee Broadway. Oh. Nashville Broadway. Nashville, okay. The other Broadway. Yeah, and this is the thing of rough and rowdy. When you start putting the pieces together, you like to arrange it like city versus country.

But sometimes themes just emerge. Like, I don't even know what to classify baby machete as it's a it's a rough and rowdy is a melting pot yes same with your matchup we got wheels of death mma fan slash truck driver versus concrete mixer yeah we got three guys he's an mma fan oh i think he also loves do mma okay that's how much of a fan which most of the time this is the thing rough and rowdy records wise we get a lot of people that say i'm undefeated in street fights i'm 50 and 0 20 and 0 that guy actually does have an mma record but you never know like what does this guy just wear affliction shirts there's a lot of like fake events yeah about that life. And I would say on the flip side, the popular, he looks like he's about to get his neck broken,

but he might do shit that we don't even know about. He might have a gun. You got to work to that. I haven't been able to get blind people, legless people. We get to weapons. Oh, my God. Blind people going at it? Raising calves.

We could just get a traditional duel. That would be awesome. Nick wants to do a coward's fight. We could just get like a traditional duel. That would be awesome. Nick wants to do a coward's fight. I want to get two huge cowards. And do like a coward fight. One blow a punch.

First one to punch once. I don't want either of them to show. You have to have like an extreme phobia and you have to offer them an amount they can't refuse for their own well-being.

Did you guys see that wrestling match of the two invisible guys? Invisible man versus invisible Stan? Yeah, did you see that fight? Of course. That was a good ass fight.

They went off the top, like through the stand. Yeah. They went, they put their bodies on the fucking line. Best matches ever. Yeah. I have had to want,

I've wanted to add side shows and I don't know if the commission would let us like Smitty and Trent have always talked about Oklahoma drills against each other. Oh my God. Like I'm like in between rounds, let's get a tackling dummy and get them in there. Like, so any ideas on the table for rough and rowdy i think we stop at oklahoma drills like that's incredible yeah there are five round fights this time five round main events for the first time so there's going to be some people are going to get fucked up we've asked that forever and i think the three that we have are good because most fighters they're gassed within

the first 20 seconds of our matchup. So the next two and a half, if you survive the first 30 seconds, you're probably good. These guys in the five rounds, they are like born to fuck, born to fight. Damn, that's going to be so fucking incredible. I'm pumped. Damn. So we're going to devise a bet for our girl. Oh, you're adding her to the mix?

Yeah, we're going to bet for her. Okay. We're betting against her, right? What's her name? Baby Machete. Baby Machete versus Broadway Gabriela. Broadway Gabriela. And what's the – does Broadway Gabriela obviously be the favorite, you think, in this?

In that matchup? Or do you think it's Baby Machete? I think you've got to give it to the pedigree. Baby Machete, because it's similar to Cherry Bomb when we had her versus Vicky D or Hot Wheels, same city versus country vibe. Cherry Bomb works on a cow farm, and she's getting dirty every morning, pushing tractors, doing crazy shit, whereas the other people, they're foo-foo, getting Starbucks. It's just a different life. Was she with Cherry Bomb in the same town, training with her?

She was. Cherry Bomb was going to come work her corner. And originally, Cherry Bomb was going to fight Hot Wheels for five rounds. Cherry Bomb had some family illness or something that basically she couldn't dedicate to training because she still is the middleweight champion. So someday, and now she's never fought outside of west virginia so you know next next show we're talking about going to maybe south carolina um charleston rock hill i've heard like i'm trying to expand actually if anyone has ideas we want to i think tampa would be a prime spot

georgia state to state the regulations we basically need no headgear 16 ounce gloves some places you know only do bare knuckle or that type of shit but i want to bring this to the stoolies more we're going to do providence in december the providence bruins kind of fucked us with their schedule we'll probably go providence in the spring but i want to make this more of a thing that like barstool fans can go to yeah and this is a good event for people who like want to support barstool they can like buy it like now barstool is kind of like so it's on youtube right on youtube we're still we're just waiting to send that link live but we're going to push that everywhere we've never been on that before so uh mobile desktop tv yeah it's just there's ways you can watch that

that you can't do on by rnr um so it's just it's just more options we're going to give away title belts for whoever's in the chat um i think i'm going to try to get Frank to be in the chat. Ringside as well. Chat will be a great addition. Yes, that'll be fire. It'll be a super exciting test. This is Rough Routy 22. I don't know how far it will go, but I'm trying to evolve and add something to it

each time that's different and interesting. Let's ramp this shit the fuck up, dude. I want to see Baby Machete coming out and doing a death scream as bats fly out of her mouth or some shit like that i gotta get bats yeah i've always wanted some john woo slow motion doves i'm working on that's fire that's hard to get in west definitely produce the bats you can eat worms like boogeyman did oh or if you just burned her at the stake she might turn into a fleet of bats like it's that's to escape

yeah it's a day when roughing her out he gets pyrotechnics is maybe my last day is like commissioner of it but that's one of my goals i want oh you're gonna go out with a ball of flames yeah so yeah we got to figure out what the bet is what's what kind of bet we could do for this for this match and how to divvy it up because it seems like everybody wants to go against Baby Machete. I'm on Baby Machete's side. That's because you're scared. I'm a man of God. I can't have her win.

We got to do an exorcism mid-round. So yeah, so it's just me rooting for Baby Machete against all you guys then? No, I'm flipping. What's her name?

Cherry Bomb is a fantastic fighter. Yes. She's strong. If she has's her name? Cherry Bomb is a fantastic fighter. Yes. She's strong. If she has the same genetics as Cherry Bomb, Cherry Bomb has bigger quads than you, to be honest with you. She's incredible. And if they even spent an hour together, then I think she has the upper hand. Yeah, if you gain one piece of knowledge in a rough and rowdy fight, I think that's what we've seen is we trying to get more some more trained people or people that have some skill but like it's not boxing it is i just want to do a mustard sandwich bet oh i had a mustard sandwich every day from kindergarten to

eighth grade so yeah so if you win you get to have a mustard sandwich if we lose we have to have a mustard sandwich sure i would gladly have a mustard sandwich yeah it sounds really fun like pinto rond yeah like you have one piece of bread but the rest of you is mustard Sure. I would gladly have a mustard sandwich. Yeah, it sounds really fun. You get like Pinto Rond. Yeah. Like you have one piece of bread, but the rest of you is mustard. The visuals are social. I'll go in on it with you if you want, Ron. I'll take baby machete with you.

Yeah. Mustard sandwich bet? Yeah. Say less. You, me, and Kyle reverse these two. And who do you want to assign the rest of the team to? What about a mustard and habanero sandwich? That's heartburn.

That sounds nice, too. That sounds even yummier for me. I would put that up on Baby Machete, even though I'm not too confident. I'll put that up on Baby Machete. What about we do a sandwich draft? We all bring an ingredient. Never mind. Lost it. Mustard sandwich with habaneros. Except take it or leave it.

Or make a counteroffer. I'm with it. What about we buy one of those popsicle things moms used to have for juice and we make mustard popsicles? You guys are sick fucks on this show i think you real twisted all right but i'm fine i'm just having the mustard sandwich with the habaneros on the side then fine all right a mustard bit mustard popsicle bet i like it thank you for your service boys i appreciate it yeah no i'm excited for it shout out special guest of

honor ben mintz will be also sitting ringside oh fuck course we're getting all the people out for this one yeah all the people who protested us when we went corporate, they have to come back now. You owe us your money. Why Dave renamed it Barstool Independence Day. Like, if this doesn't sell well, we're all dead.

You probably could do the Independence Day speech like off the top. I actually did just have Quig's deep fake Dave's face onto Bill Pullman for that, so it's very much in my head. How does it go? Will not go silently into the night.

Not just America, but the world. We'll declare this Independence Day on ByronR.com. There we go. Very nice. Thank you, boys. Appreciate you looking strong. Looking like you're ready to whip some ass. Lean, mean, sex machine.

Evelyn, you've got a good gig. I hope R&R continues to blossom. Dude, it would be awesome to do it in Charleston. Have the cast of Southern Charm there. You would love that. Have you guys been watching Real Housewives of New York? Not as much as I'd like Pause Not as much as I'd like

What keeps you coming back? The fact my wife puts it on all the time I went to Luann's Cabaret And nobody knew you there But that's the old cast of Housewives of New York There's a new cast Brother My wife puts it on all the time. I went to Luann's Cabaret, and nobody knew you there. But, yeah, but that's the old cast of Housewives of New York. There's a new cast, brother. I know a Tinsley guy when I see one.

No, Tinsley, she was fucking kicked off. I know a Tinsley guy. Oh, fuck you. But I like it. I don't like watching a show. If someone puts on a show, I'll get invested and enjoy it. I'm not going to be like, fuck this show. This shit is corny. I'm going to be like, I'll buy into the storylines.

It's so much better to enjoy the shit that you're watching than to be like, this shit sucks. Why is this even on? Watch something else then. I'm working on Jersey. Yeah? Yeah, I'm on season three, I believe. Oh, shit. Yeah? Yeah, I'm on season three, I believe. Oh, shit. Yeah, Jersey's great.

And Jersey just added two new women who are just going to fucking keep that franchise going and going and going. Is Teresa still? Oh, Judice is going to be there forever, bro. Nah, she's box office. Yeah, queen of the Jews, dude. Let my people go. Oh, way down, way down, way down. Way down to Egypt land.

Think any of the guards ever got that stuck in their head? Totally, dude. Such a catchy song. She's literally listening to me in the shower this morning. On what? My phone. What? Was it on Spotify?

What artist? Yeah, where did you find that? Louis Armstrong. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, he did a cover of it. Yeah. He's not the original.

Yeah. Go down, Moses. Way down to Egypt land. Oh, man. Is that free usage at this point, or are we going to be paying... Are we going to be paying... Are we going to be paying fucking two-ton common royalties on his fucking original hits? Old Moses.

Let my people go. Good ass tune. Is that a Hebrew song? Like a slave song, I guess. Yeah. Hebrew would be more throaty. Which one's... Yeah.

Klet. Who wrote it? Klet my people go. It would be more throaty. Which one's... Yeah. Clet. Who wrote it? Clet, my people go. What religion has the most bops or the best bops? I think it's Christianity. It's got to be Christian rock. Christian rock is good, but the actual hymnal songs. Well, they have eagle's wings.

Eagle's wings is great. I wasn't talking about Christianity. I was talking about black church. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's the best. That's just the best. But if I knew the words to some of the Middle Eastern prayers,

I think that I might enjoy some of them. We had a lengthy conversation about how beautiful that shit is. I think there's one. It's either Muslim or Hindu where it takes your brain to a state of nirvana. It's like a drug. If you hear the right notes. That sounds Hindu. Yeah.

They're like, they would do a lot of malisma and yodeling, like an Indian dude singing. I think that's what it is. But the Muslim, the Middle Eastern shit is a different type of delightful to hear. Oh, it's beautiful.

It's crazy how the young Jewish children learn the Hebrew. Learn the Hebrew words. Yeah, they learn it quick. I feel like they used to, and the Catholics used to have to learn some Latin to be able to keep up. But they just like threw that out the window just to try and keep their base. Yeah, isn't Latin a dead language now? It has been for a while. That's why it was weird that they taught it.

They taught it in school. You can speak Latin dying? Why would they offer a class? Latin dead at 2000. No. Jeff D'Lo has the black and white Graphic ready to go You've been waiting for Latin to die out

Yeah that's It is I guess it's the root of a lot of languages So it can help you learn some shit Yeah English English and all the romance languages Spanish, French, Italian And what's the last one?

Portuguese? I don't fucking know. There are a number of systems that we use from the Middle East, right? Probably. The ones and twos? Yeah. That's pretty simple. That should be straightforward with everyone.

Yeah. It's not, though. Tally system is the most simple. Yeah. Oh. Yeah, I didn't think about tally system. You always forget about the fucking tally system. I feel like writing five strokes is

a little bit annoying. How much is a five? Counting all the clusters of strokes. Tally? Stroke clusters. A five is three strokes if you write it in the numeric system. Down, curve, across. True. So you're saving two strokes.

Eight's a little bit too fancy for me. Did you guys ever do the snowball eight? Or were you guys always... No, that was... What's the snowball eight? Very, very chicken. Oh, no, that was for... Chicks, dude.

What? I never did it. Bubble What? I never did it. Bubble letters? I never did it. I know Sass had the black paper with the gel pen. No, I never would have anything. You'd write your Harry and your girlfriends last name. He loves me.

He loves me not. That's what Sass was doing On recess Fucking roses That was causing trouble You guys got me mixed up With something else That was a troublemaker

I can see you with the Alfalfa haircut Yeah Every time his crush passes He's like if only Why am I so unlovable Oh man You're not unlovable though that's probably dm and kb at recess when you're in line at four square like let's see what kyle's doing i can't

wait to get to middle school i was in a rental car swerving off the road so you could answer back quickly youngstown on the way to a troubled Four year old's house Crazy how the boys link up I was DMing KB on the computer lab The massive desktops Computer labs used to be all we had. Some bullshit.

They still got computer labs like that? I doubt it now. How about colleges? Probably all computers. I guess so. Probably more computers. Like, is there a computer lab? You know how in college

people would go to the computer lab if you didn't have a computer cause everyone has computers I even had a computer in the computer lab but there would still be a lot of people in there damn I remember

computer labs were awesome that was always the best I made my twitter in a computer lab really yeah back when bro crazy bro

walked out of there roan underscore yeah it was a different time my first twitter account crazy bro walked out of there Roan underscore yeah it was a different time my first twitter account was made by my first girlfriend and she made it like her name

and then boyfriend no and then when she broke up with me my first tweet was to Chad Ochocinco for advice can we find it? no it's deleted

damn my first tweet was to vote for the NHL video game cover. Who'd you vote for? Eric Stahl? I don't remember. What year was it? Had to have been a long time ago.

Yeah, you were definitely an early adopter. You had it in beta. I don't remember. I forget who it was. I feel like I voted for someone on the blacklist. KVR? What? Patty Kane? No.

It had to be Kane. Taze, maybe? I think it was Taze. It was Taze, yeah. Taze. Why the fuck were you so obsessed with Chicago back then? Because my cousins grew up. My cousins were from Chicago. Wow, so you have roots there?

Yeah, I used to go there every year for Thanksgiving. Every freshman year for college? Yeah, I used to go there every year for Thanksgiving. Every freshman year for college? Yeah, and for freshman year. I used to be a big Hawks fan. Black Hawks. Go Hawks! Go Hawks! I used to be too, back when they had Chelios.

Fuck, NHL 97? You ever play that game? Well, I'm fucking... Beautiful sweaters. Yes. Incredible sweaters. I used to play the 2K hockey games. Those were fun because you could change the speed and make the hits insane.

The hits were insane, no? Yeah, you could fucking hit someone and they would fly across the ice. It was awesome. Fighting in those games? There you go. There it is. Is that it? Who did I vote for?

Oh, TJ Oshie. I loved the way you adopted the dogs. 7 a.m. 7 a.m. The school bus. Damn, that was nine years ago. Run those numbers up on that. Yeah, let's get that vibe.

Let's get that vibe. Damn. How was I voting for you? 2014, were you in middle school? 2014, no. I was for you? 2014, were you in middle school? 2014, no. I was probably in high school, right? What year did you graduate? I was probably in eighth grade.

Well, wasn't it just the Winter Olympics when T.J. Oshie beat... Or no, didn't T.J. Oshie have a massive... He scored a shootout goal in the Winter Olympics? What year was that? 2014, I think. It was 14. That was like a big Barstool thing. Didn't he bring a dog Oshie have a massive... He scored a shootout goal in the Winter Olympics. What year was that? 2014, I think. It was 14. That was a big Barstool thing. Didn't he bring a dog home from Russia or something?

2012 was London. 2014 was Sochi. It was definitely Sochi. Didn't Gus Tenworthy bring a bunch of dogs home? So that's what it was. You were riding high off the Olympics. It must have been. January 2014.

And did he make the cover? Was that a winning vote? I have no idea. I don't even know what NHL was that. I guess it. And did he make the cover? Was that a winning vote? I have no idea. I don't even know what NHL was then. I guess it was probably NHL 50s, right? Tass was a little Patriot at the time. Yeah. I love the Winter Olympics.

He did not get the cover. Dang. Should have voted harder. Patrice Bergeron did. Oh, my God. Surprise, I didn't vote for Patrice Bergeron. Yeah, what the hell? I was probably trying to stray away, yeah.

Yeah, country over team how would I not have voted for Patrice Bergeron country over team you're down with Oshie I miss those hockey guys I feel like I gotta talk to Grinnell more

just to get a taste of the accent he's here today start to forget what the fucking rest of the nines do always is start to forget what the colors... Dressed to the nines, too. Always is. Start to forget what the colors of Africa look like.

Yeah, I gotta get a suit for the bar so I'm going to buy one right off the rack. Yeah, that's a good idea. Where are you going to go? Zara, probably. I'm going to go to Robbie and Co. Shout out to them. They hooked me and Mook up with a little discount. For what?

For a tux. For what? They're right down the street. You guys got tuxes? We both needed one. For what? For a wedding. You and what? They're right down the street. You guys got a tux? We both needed one. For what? For a wedding. You and Mook are going to the same wedding?

This is in the past. Oh, got it. But I'm going to go back to them. Can I just rent a tux for a day? Because I don't want to have to buy everything I have is packed. Rent a tux for a day. I mean, that could be more expensive than buying the stupidest suit you can find. Maybe you guys like these jeans because you'll be seeing them every single day.

They look so damn good on you. Is the problem. They're a real issue. That's my thing with them is how fucking good they look. How fucking handsome they make your legs look. Those are a good pair of slacks. It would pair perfectly with an ice cold high noon. A pair of denim.

You beat me in sack, I'll give you my pants. What? I'll beat you. Those jeans are mine. Deal. One for one. All right.

One try. All right. I'll go first. Have you warmed up today? No. This sack is brought to you by High Noon. Wait till you see this stuff. This is a High Noon sponsored segment.

Two. Four. Four. Four? Yeah. That's a mulligan. That's a mulligan. You get one mulligan, right? Oh, he said one for one.

That was part of the deal. Fucking. Oh, my God. No. And five. Oh, right. Yeah, you won. All right.

It's a river dance. I've never seen you stand so straight up and down. Dance, please. Damn, KB. Fetch the sack and give me the pants. Damn, KB. You just lost your pants. You just lost the North Faces.

I'm better at hacky sack than you, and you know it. Freeze up when the cameras are on. Yeah, behind the doors. Oh, shaky. Luckily, one thing that won't make you shaky is a high noon. The fact that they just have zero malt in that beverage, it will save you a lot of stomach problems if you drink a high noon. I promise you that.

The malt, the gluten-free, all that stuff is to your benefit because 100% juice, 100% tequila, just real straight-up ingredients, delicious seltzers. And you can get them in the passion fruit, the lime, the strawberry, the grapefruit. They're all delicious. You're going to enjoy all of them. You can find them on Drizzly or you can go to a local convenience or liquor store and just go to highnoonspirits.com if you want to find some high noon near you. For real.

You owe him pants now. I know. So, I don't know how we're going to rectify that one, but you owe him those pants. Gotcha. I gotcha. Do you wear them? Yes.

Yeah, they would look good on you. They would taper at your knee. They look stupid. That's the new wave your knee. That's the new wave though. I think those would fit him fine. I think they would fit me just fine. Those are some baggy johns. New out of order tonight though. Yes, at 7pm.

It's hilarious. Are we getting a Are we getting a Nick sketch? Yes. I'm in one, but I didn't. I just acted. You're both in one. No writing.

Pretty good. Both of us. That's pretty good. That's pretty good for the viewer. And I asked because I knew, and I saw it, and it's funny. A little bang for your buck. I liked it. We should start doing this monthly.

What's that? We four. Say less. I mean. No, monthly. What's that? We four. Say less. I mean. No says? Oh my god. That's what's stopping us. That's fine. I told KFC I wouldn't. Promised him. Promise me you won't mess with those guys. When were you able to talk about them

when me or Kyle couldn't hear? Oh man. Too many hear. Oh, man. Too many times. Too many times. Too many times. No, that would be fun. If we go to Chicago once a month, would they come here once a month? I say, yeah.

You come to Chicago once. We only do, only one person has to travel once a month, and we log two to three episodes. Only two people have to travel. A monthly episode, and it's like a three-hour episode. Yeah. All right. So you only have to fly once every two months.

Yes, you only have to fly once every two months. Yeah, that's very doable. Sure. That's reasonable. Because we could just be already doing shit. You know what I mean? Like if we have to go out for whatever in September. Actually, I guess we're going to be out there in September and October anyway.

Yeah. All right. Cool. There's those two months. And we'll owe you two. Then November, December, you guys come to us. Thanksgiving. For the Christmas party.

Thanksgiving at Sassy's. We'll be here anyway. This is, come on. Thanksgiving at Sassy's house. Can you have a friend's giving? At will be here anyway. Thanksgiving at Sassy's house? Can you have a Friendsgiving? At my apartment? Let's get it sponsored now so we're obligated.

Let's get it sponsored by Broback. That would be awesome. We'd love to have them. We're high noon, honestly. I genuinely am a consumer of that product. It's going to be sponsored by Jester Hacky Sacks. They have money like that?

The best suede sack in the game, in my opinion. What's their marketing budget, though? A couple bill. What's the budget? TJ, can you look up, is it a publicly traded company? I don't think. I heard Joe Biden might get indicted for trafficking, human trafficking. Really?

Yeah. Did you hear this? What are? It's a pretty big one. A congressperson was tweeting about it. Really? Yeah. Goodness. That's gigantic.

You guys missed it. Zod just jumped up And freeze framed With his fist up Yes Get him Get his fucking ass Lock him up

Doesn't Trump have like 10 days to turn himself in I don't know Into what Into He's turning himself He has to turn himself in In like Georgia

We're getting a mugshot They said A Trump mugshot Yeah They said it's coming Yeah they were like He has. They said it's coming. Yeah, he has 10 days. That t-shirt is going to be so popular.

Yeah, the t-shirt, the profile pic. Old Roe is going to be pumping those t-shirts out. That's actually going to save us. Old Roe has been dropping some incredible tees. We need them more than ever now. Old Roe, we need your best minds on this shit. What's some derogatory shit we could say about Biden's brain? Did you see his truth about the women's soccer team? What did he say?

Let me see them taste. That's fucking genius. They were so excited they just left it at Times New Roman. They just had to get it off the black and white. That's Times New Roman 12.

Who ate all the pussy trucker? I need that now. Who ate all the pussy trucker? I need that now. Who ate? Yeah, quick question. We have our best designers working on that. Yeah. I bet there's a kid in high school who bought that shirt and like send it to his like friend's address so that he'd go pick it up and his parents wouldn't find it.

Definitely. He just like has it in his dresser. Or like you wear it to school on an important day or something like that thinking it's really funny. Just walk around smugly with your hands in your pockets. And you're sitting there like, I probably shouldn't have worn this.

You regret it as soon as you're on the bus. You start sweating your ass off. Are they going to call me down to the office and search my bag? You walk into the school with your backpack on the front. We've all been there. Who ate all the pussy?

Who ate all the pussy shirt on? Turn your backpack around, mister. What? I always wear it like this. Like when a parent makes the kids smoke the entire pack of cigarettes? Now you're going to eat all the pussy. Oh, you think that shirt's cigarettes? Now you're going to eat all the pussy. Oh, you think that shirt's funny? Now you're going to eat all the pussy.

Please no more. Learn your lesson. Until she's done. Please no. I have a shirt that says Viagra. It's like the pronunciation of Viagra, and then it has the definition. It's like a drug that makes blood flow to the man's brain or something

like that. And I got it at a thrift store and I wore it to the gym and I was humiliated. As soon as I got to the gym I was like what the fuck am I doing? Why am I wearing this fucking shirt? I still get really embarrassed. Yeah.

Yeah it says like it increases blood flow to the man's brain. That's so stupid. I know. So dumb. I know. But you got it because you're like... I just have. Someone sent it to me.

Someone sent me a bunch of shirts, and that was in it. I was like, oh, this is funny. And then I wore it to the gym, and I was humiliated. Did people see you and wonder of course i'm wearing a shirt that says viagra in massive letters squint to read it wasn't there didn't they used to have like viagra like jumpsuits though or some shit or like they definitely had like lean jumpsuits yeah yeah no i think i've seen the viagra ones yeah i feel like there's viagra jumpsuits.

I think Viagra's trying to be more than just a sex pill. They're trying to be a brand. Yeah, like Hello Kitty. They're trying to get into merchandise. It's probably like Barstool. It's like how Four Loko started making STD tests. What? Have you guys ever seen that?

No. Four Loko STD? Well, their user base needs it. That's just awareness. Yeah. Our user base needs body wash. There was one... Or no, was it... I think it was an STD test, right?

Or was it... I forget what it was. It was in the office. Nick, who's that Japanese company that unintentionally became sexual? Hitachi. They're as embarrassed of their magic wands. So the magic wand is a product for what?

It's a back massager, but I believe it's for the clit. I believe it's used for the clit. It's the Q-tip of the pussy. Yeah. They're very embarrassed that it's used for what it's used for. Yeah, I'm sure they're so embarrassed that they sell out every place that they sell online. Wait, what is that supposed to be?

I don't think it's for your pussy. Isn't that what every single vibrator looks like? I hope not. They're fucking tiny as hell. Yeah, they make the mini too for mini pussy. Looks like a protocol droid. What size pussy should I...

What size pussy should I get you? What size pussy are you? What size pussy? I want to get you something nice. I got them all because I don't know what size your pussy is. You can return it if it doesn't fit. If this one's too big, I can get you something nice I got them all because I don't know what size your pussy is can you return it

if it doesn't fit if this one's too big I can get you a smaller one or if this one's too small yeah imagine one being way too small just getting sucked up

in there like a tube at a bank teller thank you tender Thank you Tender Tender 20s Oh that's gross That shit is gross

But there's probably like a factory Where they make that shit But they also make like lawnmowers and like Stuff like that, but they're associated with making women cum. Yeah. I get it. So much shit is made in factories,

and I never see the factories. Never. I don't know where any of the factories are. Aren't they not in America? Those aren't. There's definitely factories in America. There's definitely factories. Yeah, what do they make?

M&M's. I grew up next to some factories. Dog food. Yeah, obstacle factory. Downtown wheeling, you'll see a big sign Factories, yeah. What do they make? M&M's. I grew up next to some factories. Dog food. Yeah. Obstacle factory. Downtown Wheeling. You'll see a big sign that says, Largest Cut Nail Factory in North America.

Yeah. Whatever that is. Well, that's closed. Yeah, they got the dog food factory in Denver. They got the cereal factory. Oh, I heard that whole town smells abysmal. Yeah. They got the cereal factory in Buffalo,

right by Helium Comedy Club. There's one in Michigan, too. Yeah. It all smells like Cheerios. The Michigan one all stinks around there, too. And, like, wherever Airsoft Fatty lives, there's a Michigan, I guess, Post is up there? Oh, yeah. Are they?

That's, um, isn't that where Kellogg's is? Maybe it's Kellogg. Yeah. That's gotta be what it is. Beautiful little town. Lovely little town. But I just never see the factories. I would love to just see the little factory workers going in with their pails.

Oh, yeah. It's crazy. Everything in here is made in a factory. Yeah. And we don't... Never see none of it. What percentage of the items in this room have been on an airplane? All of them.

Everything? I assume so. Damn, there's probably people in this office that haven't been on an airplane. Yeah, that's crazy. Wow. Grab it. There you go, a little ball for my boy. My mom sent that to the office and she said,

I thought your coworkers would like it. We do like it. Yeah, it's a good-ass ball. Great ball. And it's safe. It's the kind of ball that you could get hit

in the head with. Yeah, that's probably why. She was probably like, she probably saw me spike you in the head. She's like, maybe give him this if he doesn't know

how to play with others. You just go, what the hell, dude? What the fuck, man? Yeah. I think I spiked in the head. I know. It doesn't bother you. We need beach balls. You just go What the hell dude What the fuck man Yeah I know it doesn't bother you We need beach balls What's the deal dude

What's your fucking problem man What's the run dude What's your dick like homie What are you into What is that doing What's your dick like homie What are you into You guys saw the boss man's here today?

Yeah. Prez? Prez, what time did you guys get in today? Heat. I was in before sunrise. Prez is here? I didn't see any clips of him in here. You just rolled in an hour 20 ago.

No way. Me? I've been here all day. You were editing. You were in the editing bay. I was doing some stuff at home. I just fucking nailed down some problems. All about...

Yeah? It's all about just compromise. Yeah, life is a trade-off. Yeah, life is a balancing act. Yeah, life is a balancing beam. That's a fucking fact. But yeah, Big Prez was in here today. And we have the case race coming up. I feel like we got

close to figuring out some teams for the case race, potentially. You think Dave would do the case race? Nope. No? No. It does big numbers. I don't think he's a beer drinker. I don't know if he's a booze hound.

You're not a booze hound. You're not a booze hound. Not. You do it. I do. They were saying have the teams be a rich... Since KB and Brandon are both... They all participate, but they're not trying to binge. It's not...

I functionally can only have like four. Yeah. She'll still get fucked up. And Brandon said he could only have about the same amount. And so we are going to I think we're going to split it up with Yak, a radio Yak versus

a YouTube Yak. So me, Big Cat, and Che against Sass, Nick, Kyle, and Brandon. Old school versus new school. A three on four. I like that matchup. Three on four matchup. Retirement match. The booth, yeah, retirement match.

Losers a coward. And the booth is just going to booze on their own. Or what do you guys want to do? You guys can compete. Try to win. I think, honestly, if we went two against three against four and the two won. That's possible. Yeah, these two are

because they don't have to worry about talking. But TJ also said that he was a bad boy last time. TJ, were you a bad boy? What does that mean? The leopard of sleep kept on climbing up on his head. I went to go help Quigs edit the episode afterwards and I was just asleep in the

row of his desks at 2am. It's because you didn't do cocaine like the rest of us. Yeah. Yeah, are we going to get some PEDs? Yeah. Some Addies? Yeah. I'm trying to get some Benzedrine.

Old school stuff. Wait, isn't that a Benz what? What's Benzedrine? What's that knock you out? Benzedrine? What is it? Isn't Benzedrine like old Adderall? It's like the original Adderall.

It's like what all those writers used to take. I don't know nothing about that. Dream? What's a dream? Isn't that what it is? Can we look that up? Benzedrine? That's what Shel Silverstein was using.

I think they were all taking it. I love Shel's work. Oh, nice. Benzedrine. Psychostimulant First synthesized I'm pretty sure it's just Adderall There's gotta be something

More than Adderall That looks like meth But that's what If you look up Adderall That's what it says Yeah that's Amphetamine

That's Adderall Adderall is amphetamine Those use meth Yeah what drug Keeps you away Okay Wow It's called a black Betty That's kinda cool Amalem as amphetamine. Those use meth. Yeah, what drug keeps you awake? Wow.

It's called a black Betty? That's kind of cool. Am I lying? Oh, black Benny. Yeah, I'm trying to get some Bennys. All right. But at Bennys, I thought we were

bending down. Yeah, that's a confusing name. Maybe a white Benny. Yeah, I'm excited for the case race I'm too We have a busy week next week I know The Barstool Awards coming up And that's all I'll say about that

Yep If you know what I mean Already said too much You know what I mean Yeah we don't want people knowing That this big thing is actually coming up So we'll keep it to ourselves until the last second who do you think is going to win fattest

it's tough a lot of contestants for that one it's going to take 15 minutes to read the nominees it's going to look like the opening credits of Star Wars oh man we need to have a trans division for that, too. Yeah, we do.

Just to get it right, because it's just getting muddied. It's just getting a little bit fucking muddied. Muddy like my cup of coffee that has southern comfort in it. Adam. Fuck yeah. Being young means making... Is this us? Am I incorrect here?

Cool. All right. Soko. Being young means making Is this us? Am I incorrect here? Cool. Alright! Soko. Being young means making arguably tasteful choices. If it was tailgating in the negative five degrees or elevated surface you decided to dance on, perhaps those weren't the best ideas, but drinking Soko whiskey? That's always a tasteful

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Drink. Enjoy. Make a more tasteful choice and choose SoCo. Check out southerncomfort.com to learn a whole lot more. You should have asked, well, actually I'm going to wait a little bit before I say what I was going to say and I'll say something

nice and pleasant right now about how excited I am. God is good. Yeah, about how excited I am for God. God is good all the time. Yes, he is. That's how you end that sentence. What if God was one of us? Sass, what do you think we're going to sing once you get a little bit of a tipsy? That's my bad, man.

I don't know. Oh, Nikki from downtown. What about a face paint? True. We do need to figure that out. Yeah. Thursday's episode is interesting for that because we're going to be leaving. Monday we're filming three episodes, right?

Yeah. Three? The middle episode, which is my dad drinking a bunch of root beer. That airs Thursday. We'll be sporadically leaving to get face painted during. And then we're doing the case race after that on Monday? Monday's the 20 Monday? Yeah. Monday's the 20th? First. Has he been practicing?

He did have one over the weekend at his mother's house. Oh, so he's good to go. He's worried about sugar intake. About dying of a... Well, he only had one? Yeah. I don't know if that's practicing. He's been out of the game for a little bit. He's not a soda drinker. What?

I'm worried. He's not a soda drinker. He had 20 root beers. Yeah, that was a random occurrence. He was like, he went root beer mode. So was he like, I'm going to get 30. I'm going to do it. I don't know.

He needs zeros. Root beer zeros. I wonder if they make those. He took off work. That's awesome. He put in his PTO request. Big Cat said, I have to come drink root beer. That got approved?

I guess. That's fair. I think that's fair. I'm rooting for him. He's very excited. Anytime you have a rare record like that, it's like a big badge of honor. All right, enough tasteful stuff. What were you going to say, Ron?

What the fuck shit you were about to say? You should have had John Richen to talk about the meth stuff. Yeah, the Benzedrine. What's that? What? Adderall. What? Like Adderall.

Is that his thing? I think on the long Friday show he talked about doing meth or something like that. Oh, shit. Yeah, the boys. Those boys had a lot to get off their chest. In a naughty, naughty way. Barstool Store also has a 20% off sale for the rest of the day today. Support Barstool. This is a good time for you guys to support Barstool.

We're finally out from the overwatch of corporate overlords. I think that we're is a good time to buy some shit from the Barstool store. Specifically the yak stuff. Specifically that white t-shirt in the middle. 100% of the proceeds go to Sass. Yes. And that's why you need to buy it now. Truth.

Sass is still a yakker. For the time being. For the time being. For the time being. What's the situation for stews? I don't know. Because there's a chance I might not be able to go. What the fuck?

No. Why? Yeah. Why? I might have to go home to see my sister before she goes to college. See her? Yeah. You've seen her so much.

You saw her your whole life. I haven't been home in like six months. Or just See her? Yeah. You've seen her so much. You saw her your whole life. I haven't been home in like six months. So just see her on Wednesday. She leaves on Wednesday. How far is college? Vermont. So it's next to, it's still in New England?

I guess it's actually probably closer to me now. I don't know. Maybe I won't. Yeah. I just feel like I should. No, bro. I'll tell her tell her the year of college is she going into freshman year oh yeah no her your parents are the let them be emotional about it

they don't you don't need to be there like loaded in the dorm room like honest to god i think you'd ruin it you would ruin it can we go guys yeah you'd be such a i'll tell her that i'll say ron said now yeah that ron said I don't need to see you there you go but what would your play be if like upon her departure like hug her endlessly

like no I would just go home so proud of you have dinner with them would you like be extra nice to her maybe I can still do that maybe I'll just go home that night yeah

let's go home after Stu's. There you go. Easy solution. Stu lives out by JFK. I don't know. I've never been. It'll be a fun day. Have any of you been to Stu's? Never.

We gotta keep a pact on that. If any of us go in the pool, we're all fully clothed. I'm not taking my shirt off. No one takes shirts off. No chance I'll take my shirt off. No one takes shirts off. Today's 4K technology? No one. God, no. With the judgy boys in the chat. It'll zoom in

on the ripples my skin makes as it breaks the plants of water. It'll be like the slow motion of an apple getting shot. Yeah. I'm not taking my shirt off. That's the last thing I need. And no one can.

I don't want Big Cat being a hero fucking ripping... What, I'm taking my shirt off. A big tank. Come on, guys, you're being pussies. No one gets to take off any clothes. We just have to reverse gaslight him and just be like,

dude, no, you're an old man. People swim with their clothes on now. Watch this jackpot. Brandon, all clothed. I'm talking... We need to get swim shoes. Yeah, I'm probably gonna get a wets now. Watch this jacket. Brandon, all clothed. I'm talking, we need to get swim shoes. Yeah, I'm probably going to get a wetsuit. Yeah, one of those old-timey. The crew picture, we can't have that.

We cannot. I'm not going out like that. No, but I think, yeah, because then we'd play chicken, and then the top person playing chicken always. Yeah. The posture. Yeah. The way that the posture. Yeah. Yeah.

We're not going out like that. After eating just whatever food we decide to order after drinking 20 beers. Oh. We need to we got to go yeah full tarps on.

That's going to suck. I might like tuck mine in. So it doesn't even Yeah I might wear a suit so there's like a jacket over the top of it. Yeah. So it like doesn't even cling to my body. So there's something else preventing that. Yeah, I'll probably wear something really tight and then a shirt over that.

And then a shirt over that. Yeah. You need the third shirt. Yeah. Sweatshirt, something heavy. Like a poncho maybe. That would be good. And it'll just blow in the wind.

Let's get a round of ponchos. I think the old metal diving suits, the Cuba Gooding Jr. ones, would be the move. Because... They're meant for swimming. You know? This isn't that kind of show. This is not that kind of show. We're not body guys.

No. Kyle. You're probably pissed off right now. I trained like a year straight for this every day. In case we're going to stews. That's why you're not drinking at the case race. You don't want to get bloated. It's one thing to be shirtless, but another one to be like wet.

The day after a case race? The day after just tons of beer? No. Yeah. None of us. We have to be, we have to stick, I need the booth on this one too. Zah, I know you don't mind popping your top off. No, he doesn't mind. Stand in solidarity with us. We have to be... We have to stick... I need the booth on this one, too. Zah, I know you don't mind popping your top off. No, he doesn't mind.

And in solidarity with us. Watching beads of water run down Kyle's body just perfectly straight and streamlined like the Autobahn while mine's taking scenic routes. Yeah, it looks like the Pacific Coast Highway. Mine's going to be catching air off the lifto off of my stomach.

Like an evil Knievel. Oh, God. Now Kyle's with, he'll be like slaloms over his abs. Yeah. The beads of water will be having a blast. Woohoo! I was going to show up to the bus in the morning and be like, I forgot my shirt. I don't know where.

Totally forgot my shirt. I lost't wear. Totally forgot my shirt. You lost my shirt. Are you guys serious? It's like a Barenaked Lady song. Yeah, it's banned. We'll all wear shirts in the pool. We'll all wear clothes in the pool, yeah. I'm with it.

Honestly, the wet shirts don't look good on me. No. But the way they cling to yours looks good too, anyway. Everybody's going to look at me and be yours too anyway but he's gonna look at me just like i bet he's ripped under what is the uh but there's a difference are we going swimming you have to big cat was texting in the group chat yesterday being like dude i can't wait to get in the pool we're gonna do so much fun stuff in the pool and all i was planning was this conversation yeah hell no like we're not gonna unionize to protect Barstool against, like, whatever.

But, like, I'd unionize for this. Yeah. Yeah. I'll quit. I'll just say I'm quitting if you guys make me take my shirt off. I'm walking out. They'll be like, all right, good. That actually works out good for us.

Saves us a lot of time. Yeah, fuck. We gotta keep our fucking shirts on. Brandon doesn't mind taking his off either. No. No, I think he minds. He does it.

I guess he's wearing it like armor. Perpetually bullied. Yeah. But there's like, even if the shirt, even if it's not, no one's gonna be convinced you have abs,

there's still the shadow of a doubt. You know, our court system is based on facts. And until people have the facts, you can still play the mental gymnastics. It's not even that.

It's just like, oh, it can't be that bad. They have an idea, I'm sure. But it is. Yeah, it's worse. Yeah. Oh, my God. Maybe we need to make a change in our lives. Hell no.

You just got to not go swimming. I'll just keep wearing solid black shirts with a heavy graphic on the front. I'll still wear shirts that all weigh at least one pound. A full pound. That's how thick I need my... One pound T. I'm sorry, Kyle, bro. I mean, no, I just

will do next year. I'll be able to do this. Maybe one day. I heard that another content creator here tried to get you to do a torso reveal on their show and you still wouldn't do it.

No, because it's it's out of now I think I've hyped it up too much and i think it'll be underwhelming yeah you better have like 12 abs that thing yeah no i don't think it's good enough who tried to make you do a torso reveal i think just like the fact that i've been lifting i've been bulking for so long people will expect a lot see how he didn't answer your question? Yeah. Oh, vibs. Oh, okay. For what? We did truth or puke. Oh.

What was truth? I guess don't... Yeah, we'll see. Spoilers, no spoilers. Spoilers, don't spoil that. Please don't spoil it. You can't spoil that. Let my people go.

Mr. Sparky wishes he had that fucking melody. I think he's got it. Fuck, bro. Look at that poor ass plant. It's not out there. My bitch ass plant. That's your plant? Yes, that's the one I bought like four years ago.

Looks like Charlie Brown's Christmas tree. Yeah, it does. Yactus is dying too. Yactus is dying? One of the stems of the yactus died. Where is it? I don't even see it. I Yeah, one of the stems of the Yactus died. Where is it? I don't even see it. I forgot about it.

It was in the other podcast room. Oh, it wasn't there? That's sad. One of them has completely turned black and died. The other one is still vital. But we need to get that bitch over by some sunlight stat. It being in the middle of the office like that is going to kill it. Fuck, that's so pathetic

there was one that Jen Simons bought at the exact same time and it's turned into a fucking seven foot Christmas tree not that oh that that's ugly oh that's

mine too that one's oh boy I had other where's my succulents? I had three succulents that are doing fine. People just think they can do anything with my fucking plants. Pretty freaking annoying. I do regret watering them with Pedialyte that one day.

Or whatever the fuck it was. Whatever our electrolyte drink was. Revitalite. Revitalite. Revitalite. All right, let's spin the wheel. Let's spin the fucking wheel. It's a good yak, boys. It was.

Fun. Let my people go. Okay, name wheel. Death to yak? Oh, no. Oh, no, not Death to Yak. So a little name wheel. And this could land on anybody.

Remember that. Get Stefan off of there. Let me fix the names. Let's get Stefan and Scoofmaster. Who is Scoofmaster? It's Connor Griffin. We found his old YouTube. And it was Scoofmaster?

Scoofmaster. Respect the hell out of him. I love Connor Griffin. Look at those legs, Roni. Those look nice. Those look nice. I'm pushing them down into the chair. Yeah, that's the move.

It makes it look way bigger. You just look like a disembodied torso with that lighting, Kyle. Oh, yeah, my black pants. Those are your pants. Yeah. Damn, you're wearing

my boy's pants. It's weird of you, Kyle. Kyle's over here wearing Nick's pants, which is... I was around a bunch of battle rap dudes this week that are, like,

heavy pausers. They just pause you at all times with anything you say. And it's actually so fun to be around dudes who are like that. How much gay shit do you say? And I don't even realize how much I say. But you'll be like, yeah, I can't believe he came from behind in that battle. It's like, whoa, pause. It's like, yeah, I don't know if he won in the building,

but he'll probably win on the poles. Yo. What the fuck? Pause patrol. Hey, yo, pause. We got to start pausing each other. That shit would be. I say way too much zesty shit.

Yeah, you do. Yeah, we'll start pausing. Pass. Nice cock. Great fucking cock on you. Pause, dude. Pause. What?

Christ. Do you know what Pause. What? Jesus Christ. Do you know what that sounded like? Damn it. You guys got me again. Come on. Come on. Just pausing a guy as he's fucking another guy so he has to stay in the ass. Pause me.

It's getting gay. Yeah, pausing somebody's gay It's like yeah slow it down Yeah do it nice Um Alright let's get the name wheel What's the name wheel looking like Yes

Let's go brother what do you got left on there I have no idea. I love that woo. I love the last one, too. Woo. What do we got? Read them off. Smoothie Draft, Trampoline Park, Sass Orders You Lunch, Bike Everywhere, or Keto Week.

You were in your bag when you made this. You are fucking twisted, bro. That creative muscle is flexed. We made these like over a year ago. Ooh. All right, we'll do that for the 12 hours. No, no, no, no, no. We're doing that right now.

Find out who's lunch he's ordering. Yep, there's all five of us on here. I'm starving. And it can't be Sass because if I remember correctly, there was a You Order Sass Lunch was also on there, and it already hit. At Lobster Tail. It was.

Lobster Roll. It's going to be Lobster Roll. Lobster Roll. One or Eliminator? One. Just do roll. Lobster roll. One or Eliminator? One. Let's just do one. Let's just do one. Let's do one.

DJ, what you want? DJ, what do you want? I don't know if that's how it works. You might be able to pick. Yeah, you get to pick. I don't know if that's not what I had in mind. Okay, fair enough. It's your thing. So, you get to pick. That's not what I had in mind. Okay, fair enough. It's your thing.

So, TJ, what do you want? Sauce me up some Lomos. Where do you buy that from? Just type it in. Get yourself something nice, too. Nice-ass dude. Thanks, man. I appreciate it.

I love TJ I don't care what they say About you TJ That shit was nice as hell You guys see Mrs. Matt Thoughting up on the timeline? What? What?

Look at that Oh Wait was she made by Pixar? What the fuck Yeah It's cheeky She is from Queens Damn

She looks like she's definitely 210. At least. That might be a gay Dominican dude. Oh, no. It might be. That's 29. That's 59210. That's what that looks like?

100%. That's what you're picturing her ass looking like? Like Mrs. Incredible? Yeah. Lomo Saltado. Would you hold the back of her head like a two-seam? Spitball. Alright.

Do you want yellow rice or white rice? Yellow. Alrighty. We're going to go with those. Let's request some utensils. Uh, yellow. Alrighty. We're gonna go with two of those. Let's request some utensils. Guess I'm doing saltado for lunch today, too. Uh-uh.

Wasn't on the wheel. Oh, fuck. What? Son of a bitch. Did the wrong address. You already ordered it? No, but now I don't know how long it's going to take. Oh.

Just went up fucking 15 minutes. Find another place. There's got to be a Lomo place around the corner. That place looked so good. Lomo is always good. Yeah, but it had potato wedges instead of regular wedges. Whoa. Whoa.

Order it for dinner. Brother, you can't go to Saltado twice in one day. That's fucking insane. Sacrilege. Rice, fries, and steak twice in a day. And one tomato. And one slice of one roasted tomato that you just eat around. Let my people all right see you guys tomorrow It's the act. Bye-bye.