The Yak - The Entire Office Loses WiFi Thanks to All Business Pete | The Yak 3-22-23

Episode Date: March 22, 2023

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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. No, Poochie, hold that up. This is a Yakagami right now. Is it? Has to be. I can't hear you, Sass. Hello, hello, hello. There you go.

We're here, Yak. It's me, Nick, and Sass. Three grinders. Three grinders Three grinders KB should be here He's crawling around somewhere Hate's out Brandon's MIA Are we on a five second delay so you can censor what you just said? Yeah, I think they cut it out

Okay That was good Let's test him out Brandon What Brandon did good um let's test them out brandon oh fuck well what brandon did so we're presented by roback uh the yak is presented by roback 20 off your first purchase through the end of this week that's spelled r-h-o-b-a-c-k.com that's 20 off all performance hoodies do you see you hear that you hear thatodies, joggers, and polos with code YAK.

Get ready for the spring with Roback. I'm wearing the joggers right now. I'm fighting through this ad. You hear that? Yeah. I just came from the dentist, and half my mouth doesn't work. Oh, I honestly think you sound completely normal. You sound goofy as fuck.

Dude, I was just sitting at my desk. Go to Roback right now. Use promo code. Will they numb you up? Yeah. Oh, dude. Promo code Yak. 20% off all Roback gear. They numb me up.

I get the gas, too. Lavin gas? Yeah, for anything. I've never gotten it. Oh, I have the best dentist in the world. I didn't get put under for my wisdom teeth. Dude, he'll give me gas if I have like, if I have to get my teeth cleaned. He'll give you, really?

Yeah. It's a drug deal. You don't go under. You don't pass out. I've never gotten gas. Oh, yeah, yeah. Gas, you just feel like light. Yeah, you just feel like good.

Is it awesome? Yeah. Can we get some? It's nothing crazy. You don't feel high. You just feel like, because then, you know, they do the fucking, I can't talk, man. Sound fine. You sound perfectly normal. You sound completely fine all right i gotta get it together uh it put he puts a big needle in your gums so you have to do the gas before so you don't feel it i the needle hurts

a lot dude so i was sitting at my desk i just got done two cavities filled no big deal hero whatever went to take a sip of water and the water just fell out of my mouth, like onto my computer. Just all the water just fell out of this side of my mouth. It's like you had a stroke. Yeah. So. That's like one of my least favorite feelings is having the numbing. I know.

I just want to be like normal again. Yeah. So I used to do that. I used to just bite my gums super hard. Yeah, I bit through my cheek once. I'd be like, I don't know what they had to do, but yeah, it was bad. Hey, Beast here. I love that your least favorite feeling is numb.

Numb in my mouth. People are drug addicted for that feeling. For numb in my mouth. Numb, yeah. Numb, yeah. It's not a feeling. Yeah. State of mind.

Turn this off. Yeah, it's distracting. Yeah, can we turn off that little TV? What's Chad saying? I don't know. It's just the delay is fucking me up. Well, we have the delay there in case we, like, accidentally bring up the thing about Brandon. It goes way deeper than people think.

And we're back. This actually goes back to, like, before he was even hired. Before he was even born. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. It is deep within his past. But it's important.

Wait, no, it's back. Oh no, that's exactly what it should be. Is this a Yakagami? No, it was. It was. Oh, we have two minutes. Follow Yakastorian. Yakastorian fucked me today.

They tweeted that I've been on the longest dry streak of the show history. What does that mean? I have not gotten wet in the longest span of time. Oh, shit. Really? Yeah. Damn. Kyle, you've gotten wet the most.

It's a cool... I've gotten wet the most. Yes. There's graphs, pie charts, C-scores. I think, yes. I think you're at 11. Next is 7. I was going to...

Oh, yeah. I'm coming for that That crown I got wet 7 times I was gonna say I feel like I've gotten it So many times Yeah and you And you also are wet

When you're not even Supposed to get wet Yeah I think that Should just be the number Of how many times You've been on the show Yeah anything Anything past moist

Counts as wet Yeah cause I'm really sweaty Right Alright Past moist counts as wet. Yeah, because I'm really sweaty. Right. All right. You're past your wet. That was a great delivery. There was like a real percentage of me that was still offended by that. Yes, yes. That time you came so wet.

Yesterday was a Yakagami. Yesterday was? Yeah, 221st. Oh, that makes sense because Titus and Jerry range it up. But having like a Yakagami with the seven main characters, that would be tough to do, right? It's never been us three. Never been us three.

That's what a Yakag he means. That's crazy. I'm going to need a double fact check on that. No, it makes sense. Because you're usually traveling with Roan. He's usually traveling with KB. And Brandon and I are usually somewhat traveling together. Yeah, I guess it's true. 1,300.

Yeah. You want to guess? 2,640 is my guess. Combos? One and two. Yeah, that's my guess. From just the mental math I ripped. I just spilled coffee on my white sweatshirt because my mouth can't hold it in.

It sucks. I enjoyed a nice cup of Stella Blue yesterday. I'm sipping on right now. It was good. I double cup it because it's so hot. Yeah. I can't drink coffee because it gives me the jitters but i had a couple yesterday when i was editing something and it felt good

coffee gets you but the really red bull does really weird me what what were you editing uh i was like i was i was uh shortening down like a sketch for instagram so you mean just going on your iphone and just doing the thing where you know like i was like tightening out i was like tightening certain jokes and oh okay make it shorter i mean it would be funny if you were like if you had to just yeah on the video button you're like i need a cup of coffee yeah could have cropping as a bitch cropping is a bit i made i've never done it right yeah it's fucked me and it saved me. When is it fucked you?

When is it saved you? You're talking about making music. Making music, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm just cropping. You are in your DJ phase, right? I think I missed the show when you announced that. Yeah, he's KB Did What. KB Did What?

Yeah. Yeah. Are you ready for a set? Yes. I'll speak for him. Yes. You bullied me into standing up and you're doing a set. I want to for a set? Yes, I'll speak for him I'm not doing a set I want to hear a set Why don't you open up

Brooking sets is all politics I'm not trying to get into that scene Don't you want to control the room? I make music for my boys, for my friends For my people, for my circle Can I have some? Can I have the set? You can have what I've been working on.

Yeah, let's hear it. Okay. You want to, what about we get you some DJ equipment, or do you just want to use the Splice app? Splice app. He uses a video editing app to make his songs. That's kind of cool. Yeah, that's cool.

Do it on like expert mode. It's actually like it works. I've done that on iMovie before. I'd like to hear sounds. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can we play, you have a SoundCloud, don't you? KB did what? Oh, no. It's not even updated.

I'm supportive of you. Thank you. I am too. I want him to do a live show. Ante will hook you up. It's not all about live shows. I want you to feel the rush. I want you to do a pre-recorded show. You're working so hard on these,

and I want you to feel the audience's appreciation. Yeah. You deserve that. And I feel that via the SoundCloud comments, all the love in the fucking... Okay. Everyone's sending it to their friends. Everyone messaging me about it.

Everyone's saving that song to their profile. Making playlists out of it that's the love that i don't need a live crowd maybe they need you are you gonna wear like uh yeah they might being selfish are you gonna wear a uh like a mascot head do you have one in mind marshmallow yeah what is your fellow white panda i believe that he has to regret that. Oh, yeah. Yeah, every time when he goes on stage with that big-ass cube on his head. It's like no chick will ever fuck me because they don't know what I look like.

He can't just go to a club and have a chick be like, oh, you're Marshmallow. Yeah, I wonder if he's not very protective. I feel like some people aren't very protective about that. What does he look like? There's IDs out there. I've seen him. It's like a regular white guy. I feel if he's not very protective. I feel like some people aren't very protective about that. What does he look like? There's IDs out there. I've seen him. It's like a regular white guy. It's a Philly boy.

Nothing crazy. But he's like one of the most subscribed to people on YouTube, TJ. Really? Who is? He's literally top five. Marshmallow? Marshmallow. Is he good?

Like, as someone in the game, is he someone that, like, other DJs respect? I don't know. I went to his set at, what was it? Pleasant Park. Like, who's the top DJ right now? In Fortnite? Yeah, I went to that set. Everyone was vibing hard.

Like, no, there was, like, no. I went to the Onk. No one was standing around. Everyone was hopping and doing the modded hop. Everyone to it too everyone you guys were there but you didn't go together everyone was just oh did you see each other crazy you bumped into each other you could see it was like oh i actually resonate and fuck with this guy as an individual it wasn't just like oh i like the music and i'm fucked up it was um yeah i can't believe't you do Molly before it? Yeah I did I parachuted a.1 Something light

And then Watched that set So it was awesome? It was awesome Yeah And I think Travis Scott did one too Which was awesome That's probably when he like

Accrued all of those subscribers Got it He's 29th 56.2 million subscribers Jesus 56 million Damn Give us one mil Alright I know Just throw us a mil He's 29th, 56.2 million subscribers. Jesus. 56 million. Damn.

Give us one mil. All right. I know. Just throw us a mil. Does he have tabloids, controversies, personal life? About Marsh? Let's see. Wait, so is he, can you tell me, I'm, I know nothing about the DJ game.

I like the music, but I don't like, I'm the guy who will find the music like three years after oh yeah i've been listening to it i run songs dry i don't listen to new albums right right so who's like top of the game right now i don't know you don't know fred again who oh um fred again yeah there's like actual i don't i don't get either. There's DJs that just play other people's songs. They add their own transitions or they play whatever they do on the turntables. And then there's like music producers who make their own original songs. Fred again is the top. So what are you? Mid-tier?

I don't know. No, no, no. Are you a DJ or a producer? Yeah, do you produce your own music? DJ, because I just, yeah. But you're mid-teen. I add my own flair to other people's original music. Like White Panda?

It kind of makes it original. Yes. I love the White Panda. Have they done new stuff? I loved their year-end stuff. Yeah, they were like mashing up all the- Yeah, they were awesome. Oh, I used to love mashups.

Girl Talk, Super Mash Brothers. Yeah. Loved it. I went to a Girl Talk concert. Now, I don't know them too well. Knowing Diplo has kind of changed the game, will you let another dude suck your dick? Did Diplo do that?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. I would let Jai Wolf. Okay, cool. Wait, who's that? It's like a Bangladeshi dude from Brooklyn. You'd let him suck your dick? Yeah, he has good vibes.

Okay. Fuck yes. You know, Diplo said he got his dick sucked by a guy and he was like, it's not gay. It just kind of happened. I actually agree with him. I believe that. Yeah. When you're in that scene.

Once you get into a scene that's like, you're always high. There's sex everywhere. There are drugs. You're always fucking. I sex everywhere our drugs are always fucking i believe that it's not like you do it in an un-gay way right yeah no i i what makes it gay maybe if you grab the back of his head while he's doing it yeah yeah yeah i think it makes it gay if it's like or if it's in the morning or oh yeah or if it's like uh oh there's a hot chick oh but there's a hot dude.

I'd rather that. You choose the dude over, yeah. And there was definitely many hot chicks. Without doubt. Yeah. Many. It's like, are you- The way Diplo's not constantly-

Grabbing the head is wild. Yeah. Yeah. Pulling the hair. Or if the guy grabs the butt cheeks. Yeah. Unless it's filmed. That also would be-

If it's filmed and you cover up their balding crown, then that's a bro move. But then if you hear him say, good boy, I'm looking up like, what? That's not going to fly with me. Yeah, that was like last week that that came out. Yeah. Yeah. I do. People were laughing, but I kind of understand what he was saying

i feel like diplo's someone who if he was gay he would make it known that he was gay yeah i don't think he would be like lying about not being gay just a dude kind of slipped in the in the mix yeah just fucked a dude just fucked it just mouth fucked a dude the straightest thing you can do is fight a dude yeah oh yeah like how many times have you been in an argument and you're like, suck my dick? Tell everyone to suck my dick. Yeah. What were you going to say, Stephen?

Speaking of Marshmallow, you brought up an interesting point. With his head or mask on, he's unrecognizable. With you being the most recognizable person here, it's, I imagine, difficult to go out in public sometimes would you rather oh it's not no marshmallow has 57 million no it's it's not i mean i people wreck but no okay yeah but what was your question that was my question to what would you rather be facially anonymous but still do it?

I don't think the job would work that way. If I was a DJ, maybe. That would kind of be cool. But, like, doing our job. Yeah. Trying to be, like, an actor. Right, true, true, true. You see Messi got swarmed outside a restaurant.

Oh, yeah, that sucks. Oh, I didn't see that. That type of fame is crazy. Well, I mean, what do you expect as Messi? What is he going out for because he's that would fuck me up that's really bad is this in argentina yeah messy you went to an argentinian steakhouse in argentina yeah in argentina you got to expect that but that does have to suck that he can't go anywhere yeah it has to suck bad yeah

he'll probably move to la But that does have to suck that he can't go anywhere. Yeah, it has to suck bad. Yeah. He'll probably move to L.A. I feel like that's the only move. Is there any celebrity that you would know, like, oh, they're at this restaurant and I have to go wait outside in this crowd? I don't think I've ever been obsessed with somebody. No, I don't think so. Yeah, but that's a lot of people. Yeah. The only person I could see going out of my way to meet would be Larry David.

Like, to see. How would you go out of the way? Like, if they were like, oh, Larry David's around. Why? I'd probably go stroll by. Yeah. But why? Just to look.

Make sure he's real. Larry David's awesome. Make sure he's not AI. It would be to just get a picture and post it to my Instagram story to get replies. Yeah. I don't even know if how to ask for a picture. I think I would just want to see. Yeah.

Get a peek. It's a weird thing. Then you just say you saw him. I'd be like, holy shit, that's Larry David. Matt Damon lives in the neighborhood next to mine in Brooklyn. Really? Yeah. I've never seen him, but I've heard of other people seeing him.

I've heard he's got a big ass head. You can just lie and say you've seen people. Yeah. No, to tell the truth, I've never seen him, but I've heard of other people seeing him. I've seen him. Shit. My dad met him. For real?

Yeah. Matt Damon? Yeah. Where'd you see him? I saw him in Lower East. Damn, I didn't even know he lived in New York. Yeah. He was just there.

He had a bouquet of flowers. Damn. Yeah. MD? I don't know. I've heard he has a big head. It didn't look that big. I've heard he's got a big-ass head.

It wasn't like head-turning. Big. Like basketball. Like OJ? Yeah. Does OJ have a big head? Big head. Yeah.

The biggest. OJ has the biggest head? Damn. OJ's got a fucking massive head. Let me see OJ's head. Show OJ's head. You massive head let's see OJ's head show OJ's head yeah big ass melon

what if that thing that Marshmallow wore was just skin tight he was just disformed yeah both his parents were Funko Pops

that's a big head a big head yeah it's pretty big that's a huge head A big head Yeah it's pretty big That's a huge head Look at that We don't see the size of an Uruk-hai Isn't that the line from Spell Show? Damn

Hoji's got a big fucking head That's a big head I would say that's a very big head No? Yeah Yeah it's a big head that i would say that's a very big head no yeah yeah it's a big head i didn't do it steven would you would you stand outside you definitely would for any celebrity without a doubt yeah you've got like 20 names that you could rattle yeah probably give us the names. Rondé Barber, Derek Brooks, Mike Halstott.

Yeah, like Brady. Yeah, Schefter for sure. You met Schefter though. Well, yeah, I guess that, yeah, but. Now you wouldn't do it. Would you? Yeah, just be like, oh, hey, I didn't see you here. But you already know him. Kind of, but like.

We're going to go golfing with Schefter. Oh. And I kind of want to have Steven film the whole thing and just have it be like four hours of just Schefter. Like him just zooming in on Schefter and then like we're in the periphery. That would be great. That would be great. Yeah.

I wouldn't need to play at all. I would have way more fun Just following him around Yeah no I know that's why Did he like you Che? I feel like he likes everyone I feel like He texted me after Not great

Really? Yeah No He said not great He was just like That guy He was just like Listen

Maybe don't bring that guy Around anymore I was like I hear you Shefty I said that I was like, I hear you, Shefty. I said that. I was like, Shefty, no problem. Whatever you say. That's not true.

He's not that type of guy. You want me to show you the message? I do. All right, come over here. I will show you the message. You want to see my heart broken on TV? That's fine. TV?

You asked if you want to see the messages. This is YouTube Live. There's no way it's true. All right, well, I'll show you the message if you want. Fine, I'll come in there. I don't feel bad for you picking this up. Who do you guys,

who's a celebrity that you guys would see that you'd be, like, shocked to see in public? Like, just walking down the street. I guess Jesus. Jesus. Guys, watch this.

Guys, watch this. Guys, watch this. Watch this. Um. That is... Oh! Get fucked. better outcome for me I know it is god damn it

I got you to walk all the way in here oh are the mean girls here I don't know who is every girl but do the mean girls have a interaction today there's beef? I don't know.

I heard she said she cried. That's a shame. I feel bad about that. But I feel like this one felt like it wasn't as bad as... Is it over? I think. Yeah, I mean, it's over. I think as a whole, we just got to move on.

As a people. There's a new beef in town. There's a new beef in town. Oh. There's a new beef in town? To Dave's blog. Oh. Yeah, well, he went after Smitty, right? Or no, Nate.

Yes. Yeah. That's old hat. Those two just love to tango. Grown men shouldn't have beefs. You don't think so? Especially in the office. Oh, I think they absolutely should.

There's so many people here who are always like, oh, I'm involved in so many dramas. So much beef. I got to squash this. I like to have beef. Being in a beef with a grown man is like grabbing the back of his head when you're talking to him. It's the exact same thing.

It's actually more gay than getting your dick sucked by a dude. Yeah. I guess it is. Just beefing? Fass, you need more beefs. I don't. He squashes before they start. I know.

Sorry, sir. I just don't know. I just don't. Sorry, Dave. I didn't want to raise. Well, that was a one-way beef. He was mad at me. I like i'm i'm good man yeah i'm humble who you mad at yeah yeah next time he's in the office you should be like hey

let's squash this thing yeah like hey water under the bridge you know what you you said some things i said some things i didn't say shit that's what you should say though he's he was mad. He was furious that I wanted money. And I said, hey, man. I'll work for free. That's on you. You admit now it was weird that you wanted money. That's between you and God. Can you at least admit that it's fucking kind of crazy behavior to want a raise?

Mm-mm. Oh. I don't even think I asked for a raise. I don't remember. I think he made that entire thing up. He was like, I don't know, I never even went into his office. Lil Sass, I never even met him. Yeah, yeah.

You should do that. You should be like, dude, this is the first time we met. I should just gaslight the fuck out of him. I never asked for a raise. What the fuck are you talking about? You ruined my entire career and it never happened. Defamation. Look at Blattman. He's such a loser now.

I know. He's wearing shirts longer to cover up his ass. He was like his old Arizona basketball thing. Oh, yeah. He's like, oh, this is the year. He's getting all mouthy. Yeah, but spring's his season. Yeah, that's true.

He loves a pastel. Yep. The spring is awesome. It was so warm out yesterday. It was amazing. Say it, Steve. What are you asking me to do, Stephen? Just check your phone for a second.

And let me know if you agree with this. I told Blattman he's banned from doing the Arizona has a basketball game today for at least one year yes yes they lost to a 15 they stink as a two as a two a lot of people including Jerry myself others Joe Biden yep picked them to go others. Joe Biden? Yep. Picked him to go very far. Joe Biden was just pandering. He was completely pandering to Arizona. Joe Biden thought he was alphabetizing the list.

Yeah. And he also submitted it after the tournament. Didn't he pick someone to win it all who lost for Arizona? Yeah, Arizona. Oh. And he submitted it like halftime of the West Virginia-Mary. Oh. And he submitted at halftime of the West Virginia-Maryland game. And he had a bracket. He's just...

He's old. So old. It's pathetic. It is. He's just taking L's every day. He's never taken a W. He's never had a W. He won the presidential election and has never taken a W. But he also like. He's never had a W. He won the presidential election and has never taken a W. Never. Yeah, and like he achieved like worldwide celebration. Like, well, people in New York were marching because he won.

Yeah. He still hasn't taken an actual W. So has he taken an L though? Because I don't know if he like can. He doesn't take an L. You have to acknowledge the L if you do. Yeah, he can't. He doesn't actually understand that he's taking Ls.

He falls off his bike and he's like, well, no one saw it. Yeah, but everybody did. Yeah, but the whole world did. He doesn't get enough credit for being kind of funny. Yeah, I think he's gotten funnier. Yeah. Because he's, like, Trump was funny in the fact that he would just say whatever like right off the bat biden is funny in that like if you can get him without his handlers

he'll start saying shit yeah and but it's just like yeah that's him yeah the the um it was when he the we shot down the balloons and uh for some reason he got interviewed as he was like getting out of his car and he should have been being interviewed it was clear that like his handlers weren't with him because he can't cognitively like give an answer and they're like what do you think about he's like i told him to shoot that thing down on wednesday it's just like what what are you talking about dude he was like trying to take credit for it it was very clear like he needed help he's gonna run again no yeah for sure probably gonna going to win again. Yeah.

It's the dumbest political system in the world. Yeah. It's like, let's find the oldest diseased brains and make them presidents. Can we watch the RBG Trump video with Elton John in the background? You've seen that one, right? No. You've never seen that one?

I don't think I know. You guys have never seen this video? I don't know how many times we can say that. What is it? When they found out that RBG died and it's Trump walking on the runway getting off of his plane and Elton John's like blaring in the background and he's like,

this is the first I'm hearing of this. Dude, it's fucking hysterical. She just died? Wow. I didn't know that. I just, you're telling me now for the first time. I resent. What else can you say?

She was an amazing woman. Without John going. Whether you agree or not, she was an amazing woman who led an amazing life. Actually sad to hear that. That's really funny, too, because that was like an actual human response from him. Then he probably got in the White House and went on Twitter like, fuck that bitch. Transcribed, that was like PR perfect. Yeah, he actually nailed it.

The way he delivered. That was the same way of finding out like your teammate got traded. In a press conference. Like, oh, really? Yeah, your coach gets fired. Baseball manager gets fired. And he's like, oh. Still got 95 more games.

Big guy. You know, yeah. I'll come after. Kim's just trying to fatten me up. Oh, there's Alex. Oh, they just had an icy stare down. Kim and Alex. Oh.

Oh. I got to give it props, though. I cannot imagine working with your mom. Imagine working with your daughter who doesn't wash her hands. Yeah. I think Kim is the one who's got it worse. Yeah. Well, yeah, definitely.

Yeah. I'm surprised my mom doesn't work here. She follows me. She was very involved in middle school, and then when I went to high school, I was like, finally. And then I just walk in the first day, and she's working at the school store. Your mother is the most involved person I've ever come across. She did everything. Yeah, she did. Still does.

What's on her volunteer bullet points? She's volunteering her ass off all the time. Does she ever get money hungry? Does she ever want some rewards? I don't know. Does she ever get that capitalism itch?

Maybe. You ever thinking like, I want to squash some little guys? She does this non-profit that she started for adults with special needs to find them hobbies. I go do drumline with them. I saw it on video. Why doesn't your mom have their hobby be watch the yak? True.

Numbers through the roof. Your mom's helping people with special needs that is our demo yeah um they're laughing yeah like what the hell mom let's get them get them off the drum line special needs people would love this show yeah like the wet the wheel yeah it'd be so fired up pacing up the show where we we just don't talk for extended periods of time. Yeah, it's easily digestible. It's good. Did you guys ever have a time in school where you went into school and you saw your parents in school?

Every single day. I think Nick just described it. But they weren't supposed to be there? Oh, I don't know what that was like. It's mad liminal. And you're like, I'm fucked. That's dreamcore as hell. You're in trouble.

I would get in trouble a lot. It was usually about grades. And all of a sudden, I'd be walking down and I'd just see my dad leaving the guidance counselor's office. You're like, what the fuck? I'd be like, fuck.

That's like the... Did you get bad grades? Yeah. No, I didn't get good grades until college and then I dropped out of college. I got all A's in college. You proved it and that's all you needed.

This is easy. I got hired at Barstool and then I stopped going to all my classes. That's like the moment every kid has where they realize their parents talk. That's like the scariest thing in the world. When you realize your parents actually communicate with each other about you.

You're like, fuck. I don't like that. The gig is up. There are some things i was like yeah my dad knows this my mom knows yeah right just now i remember it being like oh no like how did my mom know that only my dad did yeah i was like wait wait a second these two motherfuckers are conspiring against me god damn it yeah that was it. It was over. I had to kill them both. Yeah. I took after the Mendez brothers.

You ever watch that show? The documentary about them? No. No. That one's pretty dark. I do. That one is crazy. You should watch it because it...

Are these the ones that killed their mom and went to a Knicks game? Yes. Yeah. Yes. That always checks my boxes of people who commit murders

and then live their life. Yeah. Like a little time. The Florida kid who threw a party with his dead parents in his house. Oh, fuck. That's crazy. I was just watching a Dr. Phil interview. He interviewed a kid that killed his mom with a sledgehammer.

And the kid's voice, he has a demon. Actually inside of him? Yes, 100%. Because he's just like nodding. He's like, yeah, I did it. Jesus Christ. It's horrifying. Have you ever seen this card? Yeah, it's 100%. Oh, my gosh. He's just like nodding. He's like, yeah, I did it. Jesus Christ. It's horrifying. Have you ever seen this card?

Oh, it's on a card. Yeah. Does that card go to a lot? Ravel owns all of them. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah, they like bought like gold Rolexes like the day they killed them.

Right. Princeton boys. Smart guys. Wait, I thought it was LA. I think that they are from Jersey. I know that their family had a wings store in Princeton. Yeah, I think they are. Wings?

Yeah, Chuck's Wings. Famously. Like Buffalo Wings? Yep, it's pretty good. But that one wasn't like- That's how they made their money? I think it was just a side thing that they had. Oh, okay.

It wasn't really like an unjust murder, right? Their parents were molesting the fuck out of them. Oh, is that true? Yeah. For, like, their entire lives. I don't know if unjust murder is a thing. Yeah, it's...

Their parents were really bad. Yeah, I mean... And then they just snapped and they just shotgunned them. Oh, fuck. Yeah. All right. Shotgunning.

Scorpion Yeah They also were just Good looking dudes So then everyone Are there They're still I assume In jail Right

I don't know They have to be Yeah I think they're in jail For life Right We should get them on the show Yeah They're at

Richard J. Donovan Correctional In California Oh Hey have we found a house Where we can play roof ball We should get them on the show. Yeah, they're at Richard J. Donovan Correctional in California. Oh. Hey, have we found a house where we can play roofball? I got some DMs about it. You know, Doug's went to the World Cup. Yes, yes.

He said it was awesome. I think there's a video coming out. Yeah. I'll do a second hand. High Noon. High Noon is hard seltzer made with real vodka, real juice, and sparkling water. It's actually made with vodka, not with malt like other hard seltzers. High Noon hard seltzer is the perfect

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Check them out. I feel like we're having a great yak. I want to jinx it. I'm enjoying talking. Perfect game going. I've run out of things to talk about. I got something. Oh, okay.

Somebody sent me a link to Grant Cardone's store. Oh. Perfect game going. I'm running out of things to talk about. I got something. Oh, okay. Somebody sent me a link to Grant Cardone's store. Oh. He has events, and he has a couples retreat, and it's on sale. It's only $30,000. What? That's a steal. Wait, it was 50? You could see how much it was.

Yeah. It's 40% off. Yeah. That's not good business. He's showing how, oh, man, he's losing money. He's basically paying us to go on vacation. Yeah. It's only one day.

Two days. Listen, that works on me. Yeah, it does. Every time. Yeah. Every time. See if there's anything else. Those websites that always have a sale.

It works. Wait, what if we just bought one of these and just mocked them the whole time? How many people get to go? Is it an intimate thing? I guess two. See how many... Two?

It's a couple's retreat. Only one couple? You just go with them? Hotels and flights not included. What? What? For $30,000. I think... Let me see if I got this right right i think they're on vacation and they're like

we'll just have two days that someone could join us if you can get here you can get here you can come with us and that's also 30 000 they're not together in that photo that's two separate photos it's blatant that's how you know how they love each other. They really love each other. There's no info on the trip at all here. That's insane. Can we send an email just seeing if, you know, what does it entail? They're not together.

Oh, yeah. Live support's right there. Yeah. Live support, yes. Just ask. Be like, we're looking for more details about the couple's retreat. Is this a swinging situation? We need to, like, kind of ease into that it's swinging.

Yeah. Like, hey, my partner and I are adventurous. Yeah, should we leave... Is pineapple included? Isn't that the sweetest thing? Yeah, it's an upside-down pineapple. Should we leave our garage door a little bit open? Yeah, yeah.

Should we leave for the retreat? They leave a pineapple on the front step, right? Yeah. There's definitely some dudes that are just like love pineapple or like some woman that just loves pineapple decor and she's gotten opposition for some weird shit. Like, whoops. Yeah, I'm here to fuck you. Yeah. Hey, I noticed your tropical citrus.

I'd love to have your pussy. Your husband can have my wife's. Do you know Adirondack chairs are a thing for that? Yeah, I've heard that too. Really? You sell those in the Barstool store. Huh. Used to have Adirondack chairs.

Uh-oh. Wade. Mama? Hold on a second. Oh, no. Have you ever seen the Zillow listing for an old swinger's house? No. The architecture?

No. It's crazy. Is there an actual swing in there? Because those are very funny when there's a sex swing. How does that even work? How do you use a sex swing? I think they just swing in and out of the dick. Was it Meghan Trainor and Junie Cortez that were caught walking out of the sex store with a sex swing?

Yeah, Trainor. Oh. Only stands going on right now? We don't know if that's Only Stans. Oh, yeah, true, true, true, true, true, true. Oh, that, no, it's Only Stans. Oh, okay, because Glennie, he's adjusting. Whoa.

Wait. Wait, his pants are undone. What the fuck? What if we found out Glennie was just fucking those girls in there? He's never put out an episode. Those girls are fucking Glennie. I want a piece of the balls. He is like top of the line of women who have OnlyFans who want to come get interviewed by Glennie.

He's a kingmaker. He's a pimp. He's a pimp. No, he's a kingmaker. Not in the bad way, in the cool way. Oh. He's a kingmaker. He's a pimp. He's a pimp. No, he's a kingmaker. Not in the bad way, in the cool way. Oh, he's a kingmaker. Oh, that's pretty pimp. Yeah, he's pimp.

That's pimp, Glennie. What's the Zillow listing? Can you find it? I just saw one. I forget what it was. You guys follow Zillow's Gone Wild? Those are cool. Oh.

Yeah. He just posts like random awesome houses or like weird houses. I like the weird ones. Yeah, the weird ones are cool. The jail cell in the basement. Yeah, there'll be like a normal looking house in like Ohio and then inside it will just be like all Simpsons. Oh.

Yeah. That was an actual one, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Was it Garfield? It might have been Garfield. Yeah. I wouldn't mind doing that. Just having a theme through my whole house.

Yeah, tie it all together. My next apartment's themed. What are you going to theme it? Industrial beach. Might as well. That's the brand. Go from the beach to the beach. I'm so afraid to see that.

The mock-ups. It's going to be so funny. Do you guys watch Succession? Yes. I don't. It's coming back. This Sunday. Yeah. I just finished the last episode yesterday. I'd like to see what I know from really popular shows that I haven't watched, and I do know. I know they are the

Roys. Yep. Yep. Kendall Roy. Yep. My wife just turned off the ring camera. Oh, no. She's hiding all the pineapples. Yeah. What's the most you know about a show you haven't watched?

Oh, good question. Game of Thrones. I haven't seen an episode, and I think I know a lot of plot points. Oh, that is a great question. That is a good question, I haven't seen an episode, and I think I know a lot of plot points. Oh, that is a great question. That is a good question, I think. I'm pretty good at, because a lot of the shows that I haven't watched, I intend to watch. So I'm pretty good at, like, I didn't watch Game of Thrones until the last season.

Like, I binged it all. So I was seeing people live tweet, but because I didn't know anything about it, nothing was spoiled. The Last of Us. See, I don't even know what that didn't know anything about it, nothing was spoiled. The Last of Us. See, I don't even know what that's about. It's about like zombies. I guess maybe Yellowstone. They wear cowboy hats.

I guess I don't really know anything. Friends. I feel like a lot of people didn't watch Friends, but at least know the characters' names and stuff like that. Yeah, that's true. That's a good point. I never watched a full episode of Friends. Neither have I. You know what show's so good that I just re-watched? Veep.

That show is so fucking funny. Do you watch it? I know you don't think women can be funny, right? I've never seen it. Actually, I've never even heard of it. Veep? Veep? You've never?

Dude. No. Injit No It's so fucking funny Vice Principals was funny too Who was in that? Kenny Powers? Annie McBride Yeah Walter Goggins

Walter Goggins Walton Goggins Walton Goggins He's very good Yeah Any relation to David Goggins? You should watch Veep though Louis D-Dreyfus is so funny I'll check it out

Buster Bluth When's it from? I think the season finale season Was like maybe three or four years ago Oh okay So it's somewhat recent Yeah I'll check it out It's very very funny

Bingeable show Success succession was the most bingeable show I've watched in a while it is pretty bingeable I gotta maybe watch the last season to catch up I just watched like the whole thing in like two months I watched my 600 pound life every single night yeah yeah my parents were watching, and they just didn't watch the season one finale, I want to say, and they just were like, yeah, what a cliffhanger. I don't know what's going to happen there. I was like, wait, did you guys not watch the last? They're like, whoops.

The cliffhanger at the end of the season finale of the third season was fucking nuts. Yeah. Yeah, that show, I don't know if that show's good or just talked about a lot. Oh, I thought it was phenomenal. I think it's good, but I also like, it just gets, like, it's because I think any show that does New York City rich porn will get talked about a lot. Yeah. By media types.

You know what I mean? The media loves that show. What do you mean by media types, Dan? You know what I mean. You know exactly what I mean. I thought the first season was the best season by far, though. I can't remember anything.

But I'll agree. I was reached out by somebody in Chicago that has a vending machine company, so we won't have free snacks in the office anymore. We're going to do a vending machine, so I think that's pretty cool. I said absolutely. After Dave yesterday, I also got's pretty cool. Yeah, I actually... After Dave yesterday, I also got a parking attendant.

Oh, perfect. Yeah, so 100 bucks a day. Yeah, that's great. You can go in and out, though. You're allowed to. You're also going to get a bartender for the bar. Yeah. What if we just put parking meters in every spot?

I have to keep a run out. Did you guys know that two people die every year from vending machine related deaths they get they try to rocket or something that's an og fact like more people die that way than from a shark attack but i feel like vending machines have come a long way that that maybe not they're kind of the same they just added the credit card yeah okay i bought it credit card update was pretty huge. Yeah. And the vending machines with the water bottles and sodas that have the cool suction and everything. Those are cool. Did you see the new mail trucks?

I think the last mail truck they made was in 1992, and then those have just lasted so long, and now they made new ones. They look like shit. Really? Yeah, they look like a kid drew them. Can I see it? Oh.

Yeah, that hasn't changed. That blue, that classic blue. I think they stopped making, like, the mail cars. You're talking about, like, classic USPS? Yes. Huh. Well, now I want to see. Yeah, they suck.

Fuck them. Fuck them. Fuck the mail. I'm surprised mail still goes so crazy what do you mean what do we actually need it's not physically i think mail's like way way back because like amazon you're pissing off the feds dude talking about like in your mailbox talking about paper mail yeah like i'm still filled with envelopes every time I check. I never, I never check my mail. Every time I'm with my grandma or my mom, we have to stop and get stamps.

That's got to be like a waste of a service somewhere that they're sending out all these fucking mail. Yeah. I get a red light ticket like every other day. Probably should stop doing that. You're running red lights? I don't run them. They're just like yellow to red and then they just take a picture yeah that camera the camera in youngstown got me like four four weeks in a row it's bullshit didn't you post a picture of

you running one was that you did i i may have yeah pretty sure i would always run the the toll the easy pass i would go through the easy-ZPass without it and it would charge my dad. I used to do that all the time. I remember I always thought that they would just charge you for how much it was, how much the toll was. They were charging me like 50 bucks. You do have that now. Yeah. But they only have it in some

places. It's not everywhere. Right. Like the Verrazano Bridge, you don't need the E-ZPass. One good thing to come from COVID was toll booths because you didn't have to do that anymore. I think that's what shifted. Poor toll workers.

That had to suck. That's a tough job. They were like, no, this is fine. No one's going to get easy pass. I'm just sitting in this box for the next eight hours. Do change the whole day. It's worse jobs. Probably be fun to just sit there and listen to music.

Watch a game. Any job that I could sit and watch a game, I feel like I would. But they probably don't get to, I mean, there's cars coming through the entire time. Yeah, rush hour. What about overnight? I want to go for a good drive. I haven't been on a good road trip in a while. I want a road time. Yeah, rush hour. What about overnight? I want to go for a good drive. I haven't been on a good road trip in a while. I want a road trip.

Yeah. So much fun. Have you seen the trucker video gamers? Oh, their new setup? The setup is just a truck. Yeah. He's driving in real life. PFT is really into those plane simulators.

He said if emergency happened, he could land a real plane. Yeah, I don't... You're not buying it? Eh, I mean, yeah, probably. It's all the same. I feel like planes have come a long way where you can just land.

It's probably one button. Yeah. Yeah, this guy's monitors are just a windshield of a truck and the doors. And he's sitting playing video games. Look, I still, whenever I watch it, I think that he's moving. That's gotta suck to have your job be video games.

But they do it, and they just don't break the law. They just drive how they would if they were working. Zah, when's the last time you got on the train simulator? I'm actually working on the New Jersey Transit. I just got a PS5 two weekends ago. Okay. So I'm learning how to do the New Jersey Transit. They took away the Long Island Railroad on the new one.

What? Why? I don't know. They're trying to get you with an expansion pack? Yes. Actually, no, they don't even have it on that. I had to get the New Jersey Transit as an expansion pack. What's the actual name of the game?

Train Sim World 3. They should really make Fleming a character in that. How great would that be? Yeah. She's like, oh, no, Frank's on my train today. Better not be late. I mean, they had passengers on there. Yeah.

You have to do, like, the door opening and all that, the conductor duties and all that when you're on the commuter route. Have you seen the – there was an N64 game that was, like, one of the first train simulators, and you had to get a – you were a subway guy in Japan, and you had to be super, super punctual. Yeah. It was awesome. That's the same as this. The challenge is if you're not on time, you fail the level. What's going on behind you?

We don't have internet. Are we not on? We're on the podcast. Oh, jeez. Are we not live? The building's internet went down. Oh, I'm down a lot. Oh, that makes sense because I Are we not live? The building's internet went down. Oh, I'm... It went down a lot. Oh, that makes sense, because I tweeted, we're having a great yak, and there's 32 replies, and everyone's like, no, you aren't.

Oh, damn. Fuck. Yeah, everyone's like, yeah, are we? Stream is down. Damn. So we're just doing a podcast right now. They said that we'll still have this for the video on demand file. We'll have to reload it after. This happens a lot. Second time today. So we're just doing a podcast right now. They said that we'll still have this for the video on demand file.

This happens a lot. Second time today. That's okay. Let's put a mic on them. I want to see what's going on. Yeah, let's hear it. Copy it from over here. Yeah, copy it from over here.

That's not... Yeah, please. When were you guys going to tell us? How long has it been down? Like five minutes. I feel like we should still talk, right? Yeah, no, no, no. This will be good for people. Like, we just found out. Oh, yeah.

I just pulled up the stream and we're on Grant Cardone. Oh, really? Yeah. Way behind. Shit. You've been letting us talk for a long-ass time, TJ. It's still a podcast. I just pulled it up.

It's at Grant Cardone. Thank you. That was like 15 minutes ago. 30 minutes ago. I just pulled it up it said Grant Cardone thank you that was like 15 minutes ago damn oh yeah there we are L's oh no we were having such a good yak

wait Bosco had I just got a text that Bosco had some can we pull up the Bosco we were having such a good yak. Wait, Bosco had, I just got a text that Bosco had some, can we pull up the Bosco K-State video? No. Probably not. Good point. No point.

We definitely can't. Do we have like a book we could read passages from? What do we do? There's all kinds of stuff I wanted to see. Is that why we couldn't see the mail car? Probably. Damn. Here we go. Look at Bosco.

What? What? This looks kind of natural. Yeah. Wait, what's the clap? Yeah, what the hell? Oh, no. What's he doing? He's giving gifts.

Oh, no. He can't clap. Oh, no. He went to the Kith store and brought them all. What did he do? Did they win him a lot of money? This is awesome. Was this today?

Yeah, he's wearing it today. Keep it going. Foul on three. Foul on three. Oh, and it ended with a photo. That was awesome. He looked cool throughout. He looked cool throughout. I could not know. Except for the clapping. No, go to the clapping.

He recovered. That missed clap was so good. You know, the purple jumpsuit looks good. I got to give it to Bosco. This clap was so good. You know, the purple jumpsuit looks good. I got to give it to Bosco. This clap. That one. He doesn't know where he's at. Still kind of swaggy.

Still a little swaggy. A little swaggy. Giving the kith bags. I'm going to give credit. That was cool. Couldn't have done it. Couldn't have done it. Let's see the clock.

What's his ties with K-State? Who knows? He just roots for every team. I kind of respect it at this point. At first, it would piss me off because he was just rooting for the best team in the country. He's a Bama guy, right? Yeah, but I had him go through it on the pick-em, and he had, like, 17 teams. I was like, you know what?

At this point, like, if you have three teams, I think it's annoying. If you have 17, what are you going to say? Pretty cool. Yeah, it's like, okay, like, you're just rooting for the entire tournament. Yeah, Bosco. He's back. Oh, Brandon. Oh. He's... yeah Bosco he's back oh Brandon oh he's

everybody have their Kevlar on what the fuck oh wait are we back TJ yeah oh okay that's so we had to cut the middle part of the show because Brandon came in kick him out

and now we're back. Welcome. Brandon. Brandon, don't worry. We cut out the whole middle of the show when you were here. Saved your ass. Good. What's up?

Hey. How you guys doing? Sass? Kyle? Man? How are you? Hello, Brandon. How are you?

Oh, I was at home where oh i was uh at home yeah i was at home good shit yeah good shit are we live right now oh yeah yeah apparently the stream cut out for like 30 minutes we didn't know yep oh because i said that word yeah yeah yeah you held it for that long. Yeah. It's good to see you, Brandon. Everyone, it's a testament to the fanaticism of our fans, but you didn't tweet for like 12 hours,

and you weren't on Pick Central, and everyone's like, oh, Brandon got fired. Yeah, no, yeah. I thought so, too. There was a time where I thought so, too. No. Yeah. Come on.

Yeah. We're back. We're good. Yeah. All right. There was a time where I thought so, too. No. Yeah. Come on. Yeah. We're back. We're good. Yeah. All right. Get a raise? No. A drastic deduction, actually.

All right. Hey, Steven. Good to see you. How you doing, man? You want to build back together? You want to talk WWE? Yeah. Let's talk WWE.

All right. Do the WWE. Oh, I can do an ad. Okay. Yeah. All right. See how it goes, buddy. Doesn't look like a bad idea. No, let's talk WWE. All right. Do the WWE. Oh, I can do an ad. Okay. Yeah. All right. How it goes, buddy. Doesn't look like a bad idea.

No, it's a good idea. WWE 2K23 is the highest rated sports game of the year. The creation suite has been upgraded on WWE 2K23, which says a lot because their creation suite was already the best in the business. Unlock your creativity with advanced create and entrance features, visual improvements, and new additions to create a superstar. They've got all new create a sign. Return of advanced create and entrance features. Expand and create an image with the ability to create and edit images from

scratch. And updated CAS library with new fashion options. Create a superstar. Thank you very much, TJ. Pick up or download WWE 2K23 today. And we have whose video today? So we could do, you didn't make yours yet, right? No, I'm making mine right after this.

So we could do Che. Steve, you're a piece of shit. Snapchat Steve? Yeah, not you, Che. Not both, but why? Nothing. No. Yeah, let's see who we got.

So, reminder. Did he double book today? Yeah, he did double book. God damn. On Friday, we have a special edition of the Yak. It's going to be like two and a half hours. Down, boys. Yeah, the grind doesn't stop for this guy.

Taping it on Thursday. I've seen the set. It's going to be like two and a half hours. Down boy. Yeah, the grind doesn't stop for this guy. Taping it on Thursday. I've seen the set. It's awesome. It's going to be very fun. Everyone should be very excited. We're building our own wrestlers in 2K23, which you can do. And whose do we have?

Che and Sass. Did we show Sass? We showed Sass. we show Che's? We just need Big Ken and Brandon Yeah And Brown Because he's not here So are we not recording on Friday?

Nope We're recording the show on Thursday Right after the Yak Okay Go ahead and double yak Double yak And so bring your hard hats tomorrow boys Time to go into the mines

Gotta yak it up We were having a great show. I showed up? No, no, no. Don't do that to yourself. I put a pause there just so you could do that to yourself, but don't do that to yourself. No, we were just weren't live for 20 minutes.

They didn't tell us. We noticed that all the tech guys were huddled around. Those are sometimes the best shows when nobody can see them. Well, we'll post the whole thing so people will see the deleted tapes, but yeah. The audio guys didn't even give us a heads up that our mics were out. Yeah. I kind of like that, though. It was over there working feverishly.

I mean, people don't know, but we do a lot of the acts where we're not even recording. Yeah. Sitting here for hours. We only record half the acts yaks. We're not even recording. Yeah. Sitting here for hours. We only record half the yaks we do. We've done 12-hour streams. Yeah. I love it when we all go to a restaurant and just do a yak just for us. Yeah.

It's the shit. All right, do we got... Who's video? Steven. Steven, talk us through some thought process here. Yeah, this was really fun. I used to actually do this a lot. So, like, on the older WWE games, I would create myself.

So, this was cool. I tried to match my skin color. No, you didn't. You didn't get very close. They're like tan me. No, it's black. You're not black. That's coming at a later stage

but uh yeah i tried to i wanted to go with uh a specific look that i would walk out into your name's just steven che yeah okay and you made it your actual handle i thought yeah i i kept it pretty true to form i think except, except for the size of the individual. Yeah, see. There you go. There we go. We're getting there. Still black.

It's not the tone. It's the facial structure. Yeah, you're still black. Oh, the facial structure is going to be very updated and very unique because I uploaded my face. Do you become Chinese? I think when you check Chinese, do they just put that ninja outfit on you. By the way, hand up. Yesterday, I guess we were saying Hong Kong when it was Taiwan. Yeah.

Hong Kong has- We've never been- Sovereign disputes, too. Is it? Right? They're trying to- No, I think it's Taiwan. But they have their own-

Hong Kong's had a lot of protests, too. We're getting back into our geopolitical game that we don't know anything about. No, no. Touch it. Oh, there he goes. Jeez. Oh, my God. That's a black guy wearing a Stephen Chay mask.

Chay face. Bucks must be down a score. I tried to get it as accurate as possible. The face shape, I felt like it was pretty good. I wanted to have my glasses show through. Yeah. So that's part of it. A lot of wrestlers have glasses. Are you sticking with his ninja outfit? That's my entrance.

Once I get into the ring, I'm stripped down quite a lot. That looks pretty good. It looks pretty good, man. Horrifying. The fact that you're smiling too is so perfect. You're supposed to look mean your chin's about to drip off one of them some titties definitely made himself like a sick nose tackle

from utah that's what you're going for i am i am a a very large high flyer okay i think i do like a hurricanrana so So, yeah, we got the tits out for the boys. Some fancy shoulder work, but then figured out that some of this couldn't go with a backpack. Oh, you should have done the pads. I thought that. I thought that was a little too on the nose. You're using your

actual face. Yeah. I wanted to have basically my exact same backpack. This is the backpack that I own. Oh my god. Of course. Couldn't pass that up. I wanted to get this kind of look. In the ring, much different persona.

I'll come in with the samurai look and then I'll take it off. Show the tits. This is so funny that your face. Yeah, this is great. I had to switch it up. Why are you wearing a skirt? You have three different looks?

No, sorry. I messed it up. My entrance is my samurai guy, and this is my in-ring look. Okay. Yeah. I wanted to do the kilt because my finishing move is, I think one of my moves is a Hurricanrana. I thought that would just be kind of fun. So currently you are black, Irish, and Asian.

I like this. I am Irish and he is an Asian. But yeah, I also, I didn't know you could max yourself on everything. I didn't know you were Irish. Yeah, part. I'm from Laos, I believe. You chose Laos? Are you from Laos? My believe. You chose Laos?

Are you from Laos? My character. Right, well, why is your character from Laos? I don't know. It seems appropriate. I want it to be somewhere in Asia. Okay. I wanted to do Parts Unknown, but they didn't have that.

Damn, you really went... Yeah, no, I spent a good 20, 30 minutes on this. I wanted to try and get the moves as I would see fit, even though I don't know any of the buttons, so I'm going to have to wait on that for tomorrow. Are we playing the game? We're playing the game. Oh, no. There he is. And there's a punishment for if you lose it. It's just like Stephen

Shay. That's pretty cool, Stephen. I'm not going to lie. And then my guy gets in the ring and is dressed completely different. Why would he wear the full disguise if he's not going to dress on? You should have kept the full disguise on in the ring. No. You have the COVID audience?

Holy shit. That's just a set of Ellen. Oh, God. Oh, my God, your face. That's horrifying. With a little boob plate. You feeling good about it? You feeling good about Friday's?

I've got to learn how to do the moves, but yes. I don't think anyone should learn how to do the moves. No, that's just because you're not going to do it. What if one of us has already started taking shortcuts? Oh, no. Buy the game? What if one of us has had some spare time and has been taking shortcuts and might have already created his character and just wants to actually just cheat?

You bought the game? That's fine. Sound fine? Good. Okay, we got it. It's good. I would recommend learning it because if you lose, there are punishments. What are the punishments? Not much you can do to me at this point.

Two people have to put on a wrestling onesie. Not a punishment. For the rest of the episode. Would like to do that anyway. There's a wet. And then we have some chairs and some breakaway bottles and stuff. Oh, hell yes. Question.

If we have wrestlers actually here with us, are they eligible for the wet wheel? No. Well, come on. They should be. We will have wrestlers. Austin Theory and Baron Corbin will be here. I think they're down to get wet. Legally speaking, no, they're not.

I want to hit someone with a chair. That's in their contract. That's got to be it. That's an awesome contract. I should have worked in a dry closet. I can't get wet. It's going to be awesome, though. It's a legit ring downstairs. I thought it was just going to be like a stage. It's real. There's ropes. There's turnbuckles.

It's a real ring. You can take a bump in. I might have to. I would like to take a bump. I want to say in real life, but it's not real ring. You can take a bump in. I might have to. I would like to take a bump. I want to say in real life, but it's not real life. In my imagination, when I was a wrestler, my finishing move is the Texas Cloverleaf, but it's called the Jersey Turnpike.

That's a good name. That's not real life. That's your imagination inside of real life. Maybe we'll have to edit that for the game. The Jersey Turnpike. Pretty good, right right it's not the worst thing i've ever heard what would yours be no idea well i i thought about this your entire life yeah yeah i don't know are you a jobber in your imagination no i'm just a guy i'm just a guy that the fans love man i'm just a guy that the fans can get behind i'm just a good old boy out there

wrestling. You're a manager, aren't you? Huh? You're a manager. Depends. Depends on what's needed at the time. Wait, so when we play, are we doing like tournament style? Like how are we deciding who plays who? We are doing tournament style. We can decide whenever. You want to decide now? Yeah. How do you want to decide? Tournament style.

How do you want to decide who plays who? I guess the wheel. You know Brandon and Steven have to play each other because they're both trying. Well, I'm trying too. No, no, no. That's not. Oh, you bought the game too? I'm going to buy it today.

He's also good at video games. It's going to be. I lost. I lost against the computer. It should be Brandon versus Sass. Okay. No, why? Just make it random. You're gamers.

You guys are the gamers. You guys are the gamers. I'm not a gamer. Tommy's the gamer. You just said you've been practicing the gamers. You guys are the gamers. I'm not a gamer. Tommy's the gamer. You just said you've been practicing the game. I was lying. Is it a sick game? Yeah, it's always sick.

I'm excited to build my character. Did you guys see the Deer on the Rocks, the guy on Twitter who made us all as the wrestlers? Yes. Yes, let's show those. He's done great work in the past. Oh, yeah. I think he made me a Pokemon trainer Oh, so awesome

That looks cool Come on That's awesome That's just Aaron Feld Yeah, you just look like a strength and conditioning coach Okay That's me Nick, you look awesome

Steven Trey This is exactly why you wanted to see me. You have no belly button. Yeah. Yes. Strung out. The guy who is me, that's the guy who I get tagged in a lot with the porn on Twitter. Oh, KP.

Yeah, that's awesome. That kind of looks like him. Holy fuck, that rules. Okay. Okay. That one, it scares me a little. Roan. Oh, man. Chisel. little Roan Look at his jaw

Hot So hot Oh the tank TJ Hell yeah TJ Zah Oh my god Zah What a beast

Yeah Titus Zah Oh my god Zah What a beast Yeah Oh Titus That looks cool Yeah Jerry Did he give us Mincy Oh I need Mincy Yeah so 2K23

We're gonna have an awesome episode on Friday with it Shout out 2k23 we're gonna have an awesome episode on friday with it shout out 2k23 great sponsor go buy it now build yourself wrestlers winner gets a title belt winner gets a real belt yeah can we do something where like people can use our the winner they can download it brandon knows more than me about the game i think you can yeah we're gonna upload all of them i don't know how it works. That's awesome. So people can play as us. Yeah. Okay.

So, like, hyper-realistic AI just came out of nowhere, it seems like, and we're just not going to pretend it's cool? Oh, it is cool. I don't think the chat ones are cool, because that's existed since AIM with Smarter Child. Not to the level it is now. But it's just like, oh, this is so scary and then you're texting it.

I don't know. That doesn't really make me feel anything, but the voices are scary. Not like scared, but we haven't had anything like this. Who are you thumbs up in, Brandon? Steve. What are you going to do? I'm getting ready to go do my wrestling character.

Want to go build it? Uh-huh. Then I'm going back home to practice more baseball and continue putting together my grill. Practice baseball? Yeah, the seven-year-olds in baseball. Ah. Exciting, exciting news. He's a switch hitter.

Oh, that is exciting. Pete. Okay, we'll talk to Pete, though. But you can hit left-handed and right-handed. Pete, people are saying you should have the wet wheel. For breaking the internet. Just one spin. Wet or dry?

No. Why? You're a what? Talk to the mic. You're a what? I mean, I was going to say I'm an adult and I just can't go get wet. The wheel is just. Yeah.

If it wasn't your fault, the wheel will not pick you. I just, in truth, the wheel is random. No, it's not. It's not. Why would it be random if Brandon had to get wet on Monday? Would you see that? Bad, bad boy. What did Brandon do?

He's been a bad boy. Oh, come on. He's been a bad boy. Oh, come on. He's been a bad boy. Look out, Pete. Well, this was fun. I kid you not, he walked in the room, the internet went out again. No. Oh, come on.

The internet went out again. Soak yourself now. Come on, Pete. I think this is fair. The wheel works, so the internet works, and so that's just where we're at. No. No. Look at that.

It's out. Can't do anything. It's out. Also, the wheel doesn't really require internet. Yes, it does. This has been an issue since this office opened, right? It opened. I think we should move.

It's been an issue since we changed the wifi Right When I first started here we had normal wifi And then they changed the wifi and it sucked And that's Pete's whole line It's not the internet it's the wifi What's the difference Internet is wifi

Right It plugs in It's out again But if it is The wifi not the internet Right. Who plugs in. Yeah, it's out again. But if it is the Wi-Fi, not the internet, why wouldn't those guys back there be plugged in? I feel like they would be the most plugged in people we have. The whole building's out.

The whole building's out. A couple weekends ago, we didn't even have toilets. God damn. Yeah. Are you going to go ahead? Somebody did something to those toilets. Because I walked in to this bathroom, and the toilet was, it wasn't like the lever flushed, but there was just a swirling, the water, and it was going everywhere. It was going crazy.

So somebody did that and then bounced. It was going brazy? Yes. It was going crazy. Somebody did that and then bounced. It was going brazy? It was going absolutely brazy. I hate when the toilet goes brazy on me. Brandon, are you going to be the coach who pitches to the kids? I don't know if they need me to help because right now

my schedule doesn't allow me to coach. It's lightening up. It has lightened up tremendously. It's the only show you have. I will help them out. I've done that before, not be the coach, and then the coach couldn't show up, so I'm just out there in dress pants pitching to the kids. Dress pants.

What, did you go home and change into dress pants? No, before I worked here, i actually had to dress up for work wait so switch hitter that is very exciting yeah he's a left natural lefty uh and we've been teaching him to swing left-handed and then one day he just said look i'll try it but and he did it just as well right-handed yes you can do both you guys like go and hit with a bucket of balls in the backyard we do because he's he's seven so he's uh that's still the best way to do it because i remember it was such a bitch my dad would bring a bucket of balls. In the backyard we do because he's seven. That's still the best way to do it because I remember it was such a bitch. My dad would bring a bucket of balls. We'd just have to collect them after every round.

I have a bucket of balls for every game. I would all be at the backstop. Real easy. I remember I wanted to be a catcher. That's usually when you're accepting defeat when you're that young and you're a catcher. You realize that you suck At everything else Yeah

Like maybe I could just Catch the ball Still can't do that Can't do it I just wanted the glove Throwing it so fast Yeah I wanted the glove Really bad

Yeah Yeah the glove was awesome So is he like Your favorite now? He's rapidly gaining yes Although Tommy Who hasn't played baseball from 8 to 12, he was not interested in it.

And today he asked if he could sign up, which he'll be so far behind. But I might just take a few weeks off and work with him. But I don't know. I mean, he can learn quick. Or behind. Huh? It doesn't matter. I don't think it matters either.

I would make sure he actually wants to. Yeah. Yeah. But, yeah, the 7-year-old is all about it. Every day I get home, he has the bucket of balls waiting on me, and we have to go to the backyard and throw. Also put together my grill, which is exciting. Going to have a good weekend of grilling ahead of me.

Damn, you've had a lot of free time. I've had a lot of free time. So I have a lot of free time. A lot of my mind's been wandering a lot. How does your mind wander when you're on the grill? It's been very productive. That's exactly what. That's beautiful. That was the most mind's been wandering a lot. How does your mind wander when you're on the grill? It's been very productive. That's beautiful. That was the most beautiful thing I've ever heard.

That's when the mind is supposed to be at ease, brother. What have you been thinking about? Between you and that steak. I also got to go out to Chicago and find a house. I'm going to figure out when I'm going to do that. Do you still? I do, actually. I do. Chicago's now my escape. Smaller house than you were looking at earlier. Yeah.

Thinking about just doing like a townhouse. Yeah. I'll be a lot. Yeah. One car garage. Yeah. I'll probably be in the city now. In the loop.

Yeah. All right. So what else is going on? Make it to your kids. You're not getting a water slide anymore. TJ's now left the booth. That's always a good sign. Uh-oh.

Oh, are we supposed to go down? Oh, we're going live. So this is all recorded, though, so people can watch the whole thing because we did have some great banter. What was the best banter? KB had me tickled pink with talking about Fortnite. Yeah, when he dropped that, that was a perfect delivery.

That was early, though. That was early in the show. Yeah. I guess it all was downhill from there. So what are we live on right now? Oh, YouTube. Oh, from your phone. Shout out to people.

Big shout out. So why don't we do the wet wheel, or why don't we do the wheel and then just end the show because it's clearly not working. Yeah. Give us a behind the scenes of you spinning it. Show the people. Oh, yeah. Show the people what's up.

Infrastructure. And then the whole one will be available. So if you're watching this now, thank you for watching it. After the fact, let's all make sure we retweet the video when it comes out. This brings up an interesting problem. If the wheel is internet-based, we need a physical wheel. Just in case something like this happens. We have one.

We're going to have to paint your cock. Yeah, it'll be the stopper. Spin it. That should be a sliver on the wheel. Your cock has to be the stopper for the wheel. Somebody said this before. The wheel that you use for piss dogs in the old office is the wheel. Yeah.

Where is that? I think it's in your studio right now. No idea. I don't think so. It could be anywhere. It could be gone. It could even be a boat. Oh, look.

He's got it. I don't know how he's doing this. Oh, because it was the pre-recorded wheel? Oh, he's using the pre-recorded one. So it's Brandon. Yeah. Damn. Ooh.

Now, this would be funny if we just got death to yak. Yeah. And then people would wait for the stream to come back up. Never would. Wouldn't even know what happened. Just waiting and waiting. Yeah, I can't open the name, Will. We'll start the show with that tomorrow.

So no, we'll have to wait until it opens. You can go, Brandon, and start your character, because I have to do mine after, so I'd rather you be done sooner. He seems good. He seems good. Yeah, he seems totally fine. He's to the acceptance level of grieving. Oh, man.

His one-on-one texts were funny. He was saying his goodbyes to me. Oh, no. It's dramatic. That's okay. Yeah. It will all settle me. Oh, no. It's dramatic. That's okay. Yeah. It will all settle down. I told him that.

Don't worry, buddy. Don't worry, you big lummox. That's what he is. Yeah. He has the oaf card, and he refuses to play it. Yeah, he should just be like, I'm dumb. He should do the dukes. The dukes card is undefeated.

Yeah. Not a smart person. One yokel gets him out of it. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I'm just a big dumb idiot. I didn't know microphones were live.

That's what that thing is in front of me? This fucking internet, man. What a piece of shit. He's What a piece of shit. He's a real piece of shit. Take it easy on the guy. Does Al Gore not get enough credit for inventing the internet? No, but whoever did should be way more famous. Right?

Yeah. Al Gore didn't invent the internet. It's some guy. I thought he did. Timothy Berners-Lee. Berners-Lee, yeah. You should be didn't invent the internet. It's some guy. I thought he did. Timothy Berners-Lee. He made the internet. He made the internet. He made the world small. He should be up there

with Edison. I've never even heard that name before. Why is he not more famous? Is it like Satoshi where everyone's trying to take credit? How did he make the internet without the internet? I know. He invented the World Wide Web. What?

Al Gore? Didn't he need internet access to do anything of that caliber? Yeah. Hook it up and, yeah. Was he working with his hands on it? You have to bury cable, don't you? Was he getting muddy? Yeah.

Oily? Yeah, anyone who makes the first event. He comes in dirty. Was he like, was that white collar, blue collar? He was blue collar making the muddy? Yeah. Oily? Yeah, anyone who makes the first of anything like that. He comes in dirty. Was he like, was that like white collar, blue collar? He was blue collar making the internet. Yeah, he had to use some like actual items. He was coming home exhausted, pissed at his wife. Filthy.

He's an internet man. Yeah, I'm a net man. Got so excited when he got his first junk email. Oh my God. Who invented the first camera? We should know that as well. We should know that. He doesn't get any credit.

Alan Camera. It was. Was it Alan Camera? No. Oh, fuck. Chase got choked. Kyle. Damn.

He doesn't usually bring that heat. He doesn't choke like that. You fell for Alan's camera. It kind of is believable. The camera, the film camera is not actually that, like, complex. That has to, like, really. The first one had to. It's a really simple idea.

The Chinese invented everything, like, a hundred years before everybody else. Camera seems Chinese. Yeah. You're literally just exposing the film to light. Yeah. Yeah. It like puts that light on as the photo. It's very it's a very simple video though. I feel like whoever. Yeah that's crazy. I think I feel like whoever created film itself is way more impressive than whoever created the camera. Right. OK. I agree. Exposing the film. I see what you're saying. like taking pictures not that hard taking video hard hard very hard i was i was thinking like things don't get really invented every now anymore right like

oh i think they do a lot what's the last invented thing electric car i think it's all like sub inventions of the internet like Like AI or whatever different... What is your mind most blown by invention-wise and time-wise? Not electric cars. I think planes when you really think about it. Planes are insane. When you're on a plane and you start thinking about it, it just doesn't make sense.

And they're way older than they should be. Right. People are flying commercially. They're still using those models. Yeah. Yeah, the plane is insane. They're not using those models yeah yeah like they're not they're not like new models they're like really like remake the planes obviously but it's the exact same model big like like the buildings brooklyn bridge crazy like yeah structures that

were built so long ago that that is look immaculate have you guys ever seen the videos of like the a380s um flying like they how slow they can fly and stay in the air? It's horrifying. They're not, like, hovering. They're, like, barely moving. And they're the biggest. A380 is the biggest passenger plane in the world. It fits, like, a thousand people.

And they're just, like, barely moving. You sure it just doesn't look like that? Is it an optical illusion? No, they can fly super slow. I don't like that. They fly super fast? Is it because their wings are so long they glide? Probably, yeah. Huh. How come those hoverboards are not more popular?

Because they're not like an impressive invention at all. It's just wheels. Yeah, it's just two wheels. And they're not hovering either. Don't they catch on fire? Yeah, they explode. Yeah, the real hoverboard would be very cool, but I don't know catch on fire yeah they explode yeah the real hoverboard would be very cool but i don't know have you seen those like that thing you do in the water where you put on like a jet pack that shit looks weak yeah that's not a hoverboard though i'm saying like an

actual like skateboard that hovers would be cool yeah like an like a like an air hockey yeah people would be down with that we don't have that i just thought of how to make it how what if the board was just you know how like magnets when you have one positive one negative like all right hold up hold up he's cooking he's cooking a little distance apart let him cook what if you could figure out the composition of like concrete and then you and that house has a gravitational pull to it and you did an opposite

charge to it and made that the board. How do you go forwards? Put your weight forward. How? What's this? Check. What is this? So we just need to revamp all of our roads. No, he checked you. No, you don't. No, he checked you.

Lean forward? Check you. You just tilt forward. You're not going to move forward. Careful. Choose your next move. Very carefully. You don't want to be checkmated.

A king's in the corner. Wait, but you're saying like, yeah, why haven't we just invented something that's opposite magnet of concrete? That's the hard part. I think it would have to be like some type of gravitational pull. But that's the invention. You're like, why don't they just make it? And I guess what would be hard is if you got off the board and just fly into the... Right.

Or it wouldn't be that much. I don't know. But again, you see what I'm saying? You see what I'm saying? Like the invention of whatever substance you're talking about is the hard part. Yes. You're just like, go make that. Yes.

Concrete a magnet? Yeah, I don't think it has a magnet. The gravitational pull of Earth's core, crust, whatever. It's keeping our feet on the ground. Do the opposite of that. So an airplane? Streams back. Are you talking about an airplane?

No. You want to make the opposite of the Earth's crust. Yes. A hoverboard. You want to make something that repels, that is like magnetically repelled. Yes, exactly. That's anti-Earth's crust. Yes.

But that, you need propulsion. You're talking about an airplane. But you just move your weight forward and back just like you would on a hoverboard with wheels. That's because it has wheels. This would be frictionless. You would just lean forward, wouldn't you? You'd go forever. I guess you have to figure out the elements. But you're pretty correct.

For people who just joined us back, the full show will be posted afterwards, but Stephen just thinks he invented a hoverboard. No, we're not there. You confidently think there's something there? There's building blocks of something real. This looks like it. This looks like a cafeteria tray. think there's something there? There's building blocks of something real. This looks like a cafeteria tray.

Oh, okay. Oh. This is fake. Oh, Lexus? The Lexus? No. When was this posted? 2019? No. No Why is there so much Yeah

It's dry ice I feel like they wouldn't be Like banging it up Letting you grind with it Yeah They're not even making it look fun No That looks

Slabority I wish that had wheels Yeah Actually yeah Hoverboards suck Yeah look fun. No. That looks boring. I wish that had wheels. Actually, yeah. Hoverboards suck. Yeah. Unless they truly you can figure it out. But why? It would do the same thing. It should be a skateboard? Yeah. I guess grass? I guess. And then checkmate

on Steven. That's checkmate. Yeah, you forgot about grass. The coolest part of a hoverboard would be going over grass, not concrete, where you could just use wheels. And you don't have that. Well, no, it wouldn't be go over. I mean, no. Cars don't go over grass.

It would be cool if they did. Yeah, but we're talking one step at a time. But cars are also big. We're talking about little hoverboards that would be cool if they could go over any type of surface. You're talking about like V2, V3. I'm talking about just getting this thing off the ground. I went to V2

that quick. But why would anyone want to buy what you're giving us when we could just get a skateboard or a bike or a rollerblades. Next gen. Not a fan of innovation? This isn't for you.

I think Steven actually should go into some pitch meetings, just frustrate everyone. Answers that don't really answer anything. Yeah, but confidently pitching. Your idea works. You just don't get it. Yeah, you're just confidently answering nothing. Why do we need this?

Next gen. What's the point of this? Haven't you thought forward? You're just confidently answering nothing. Why do we need this next gen? What's the point of this? Haven't you thought forward? Have you ever thought of like if you started a business, what you'd want your business to be? Ooh. I thought like a food truck for barbers would be cool. I did see that one. What? That would be cool.

For them to eat? No. Yeah. Just for barbers outside of Barberley. Barbers would be cool. I did see that one. What? That would be cool. For them to eat? No. Yeah. Just for barbers. Barbers to eat at or? Only barbers could eat there. No, it's like a barber shop inside of the truck. And it'll park in front of like here.

And you can go down and get a buffet. You know that picture that went viral probably a few years ago where it was a grilled cheese stand? And it was... Oh, he's on the phone. It was like all we do is grilled cheese you good yeah i was like all you could do is plenty of grilled cheese food trucks right but it was it was like a picture it said all all we do is grilled cheese no change like if Like, if you give me $20, you get 20 grilled cheese. What?

People, like... The simplicity of that would be pretty sick, where it's like, there's nothing else that you can order. That's all by design to be, like, charming. Like, people make things inconvenient for charm. Right. Like, cash only. Like, you have to go far away to get there. You have to have a fucking password to get in.

Yeah, like, you want to feel like you earned it. Yeah. Right but so it's it's just all they do is make one type of grilled cheese that's it if you give and it's one dollar per grilled cheese and they don't have change so if you give them five dollar bill you get five grilled cheese but you convince yourself it's better than it actually is right yeah that would be nice but what do you mean one dollar grilled cheese yeah full one yeah because i mean think about it if all you? A $1 grilled cheese? Yeah. Full one? Yeah, because, I mean, think about it. If all you do is make the grilled cheese, what is a piece? If you buy everything in bulk, cheese and bread is nothing. I might get grilled cheese for lunch.

Butter. Butter. But that's like. Tomato soup. You could sell enough. The margins would probably be pretty good, right? Maybe this doesn't work. Yeah, I don't know.

A dollar is so cheap. Yeah, but the grilled cheese, that's not a dollar worth of product. Right. It's probably like 15 cents. I've never even heard of a dollar grilled cheese. I would get it. Can you try to find that? What about dollar slice of pizza in New York?

That's more ingredients than a grilled cheese. I guess you're right. Two Bros just stopped selling dollar slices. What? Dollar fifty. Inflation. Last dollar slice of soda. Thanks, Biden.

Another L. Another L for the L, boy. Can you try to find that picture, TJ, the grilled cheese truck that does... I don't know, it was also unnecessarily aggressive about it, too, which people like. Yeah, here it is. I bet you this guy cleans up.

Danger, $1 grilled cheese. Don't ask for a goddamn tomato slice, or I swear to God, I'll reach through that window, pull you inside, and hold your head against the griddle, which will be embarrassing for you. $1 grilled cheese. No change given. Sort out your own shit.

Cash only. I don't have Venmo because I'm not some teenage asshole who vapes. What does it say on the other side? Menu. $1 grilled cheese. That's enough. If you need a drink, go to a place that sells drinks. This feels like an idea that this dude, it's good for a Tumblr post.

Yeah, I don't like this. Don't you kind of want to buy one? He's too sassy. A badass dude, but I don't think he is. Oh, you don't think so? It's also a good place to take a picture in front of. Make grilled cheese for a living. This is not some bad motherfucker.

This is all a marketing ploy. I'm out okay that was i would like the dollar grilled cheese that was my only business idea was someone else's business that was your idea i like that idea wait a minute i have a ebay is my business idea that's mine y'all know how much candy costs nowadays did you just drop a y'all on us? Yeah. I went to a 7-Eleven and a CVS the past couple days. Candy's like three bucks. Like, for one candy.

Like, a bar? Yeah. No. Yes. No. Like, $2.89. No. Yes.

No. Brandon, confirm. That's crazy. Ask Brandon how much a candy bar is. He just said, did you know that you can go down any place in New York City and get a $20 blowjob? Really? Yes. No, I did not know that.

Can you? Where? What's the price ahead right now? What is the price ahead, Kyle? Steven just said $20. Ah, it seems cheap. You definitely can't do that. $20 for head?

Yeah. It's got to be at least like $50. Think about it. The margins are very low. So what's a hand? It's a mouth. What's the cheapest hand job? $5?

Head is that much more than head? Yeah, no, head can't be that much more. No, I think it can be. I think head's a big step up from a hand job. I would say head is double hand job. I'd say it's $15 more than a hand job. That's $20. Yeah, there you go.

Ask your question again. But you're just talking about bargain basement head, right? This is the lowest, lowest. Yeah, no, there's no, there's no, there's no, yeah. I'm talking about candy. Are you talking about candy? I forgot. Oh, I thought he was talking about head.

How much is a candy bar? Nowadays prices. $1. Are you talking about candy? I forgot. Oh, I thought he was talking about hands. How much is a candy bar? Nowadays prices. $1.50? Yeah. What? Almost $3. I feel like you've just, they're just charging you whatever they want to charge you. I think Big Candy has us where they want us because now most of the candy bars you see

in the grocery stores are the big ones. The big ones. Yeah, you're talking about the big ones? The big ones. Not just the little ones. Maybe, yeah. Yeah, you're talking about the big ones? The big ones. Not just the little ones. Maybe, yeah. You can't find a normal-sized payday anymore. Yeah, it was a share.

You can't. But it's like $3. Where can you find one? All right. I think candy's still $1, $1.50. No. I think in the past. I bet it's like $3 for a candy bar.

Maybe $2. Maybe $2.50. It depends. A Reese's Cup? Somebody go downstairs and get some candy bars. The guy in the corner bought these notebooks. There's a drugstore below. What did you buy? I bought six, but I thought they were going to be way smaller.

I have one. Pretty small. That's a small notebook. Is that small enough to put in my pocket? I got to get you on field's pretty damn small. That's a small notebook. Yeah, but is that small enough to put in my pocket? Yeah. I've got to get you on field notes. It looks like it fits a small notebook. It's perfect, actually. Yeah. I have one. Good purchase. You cannot, unfortunately. Wow. Those are going to be

actually with jokes. I know. Okay. I used to carry those around when I was gambling back in the day. I'd write down all my bets. I found one of them when I was moving. You want one? Yeah, I just want to hold it. I'll give the day. I'd write down all my bets. I found one of them when I was moving. You want one? Yeah, I just want to hold it. I'll give it back.

I'm going to have you nostalgic. Oh, these are nice. Down the corner has jerseys again, by the way. Ooh. They had two Michael Jordans. Two different ones? Yeah. What numbers?

I can see both 23, but one's script and one's not. I'm going to have to buy some tomorrow. Oh, fuck. What, notebooks? Oh, jerseys. Jerseys. Oh, yeah. One's script and one's not. I have to buy some tomorrow. Fuck. What? Notebooks? Oh. Jerseys. Oh, yeah.

Buying jerseys like we're... Did you make your character? I did. Nice. Yeah. Looks like me. He is me. All right. So should we do the name wheel because we hit it?

Oh, yeah. I wasn't kidding when I said I cheated a little bit. What do you mean? Nikki. Brought him from home. Uh-oh. All right. All right.

I don't... Okay. I think we may need to spice up our name wheels again. Yeah, reconfigure our name wheels. To revamp. You want to make a new name wheel, Nick? What do I have on there? Lunch of Fate, Itsy Bitsy Buyer, All Eyes on You, Wikipedia's Revenge, Origami, and VRBYs.

Remember, Origami was good. VRBYs was good as well. VRBYs is good. Awesome. Yeah, let's keep my wheel. All right. Let's get VRBYs, please. What's all eyes on you?

Oh, all eyes on you sucks. Okay. Uh-oh. Oh, a lunch of fate. So tomorrow we're doing lunch of fate. Yeah, go on. We all have to pull up our delivery apps, and without looking, click, and then buy, and you are eating your lunch of fate tomorrow.

All right. Not allowed to look at what you're clicking on. I like that. It's fun. We used to do that in college. God, it wasn't all eyes on you. We used to do that in college where we just scroll the phone and just have to call a random person. So I used to do it at Sheetz on the touch screens to order food.

How are we going to randomize it? I think you'll scroll, tap, scroll, scroll, tap, tap, tap, and then see what you're adding to your cart. And then you buy it and you have to eat that. I think someone else should have to eat your lunch of fate. Somebody else has to eat your lunch of fate. Like the person next to you or whatever.

So no, we'll then spin a wheel of a number. You get number one, you get the first delivery. Yeah. Oh, that's great. a wheel of a number. You get number one, you get the first delivery. Yeah. Oh, that's great. The first to show up. Yeah. So you scroll, scroll, scroll. Or maybe you get a letter.

Type the letter in and you get like the number two, like the fifth result. You get like C5, you get the fifth. That's not how you play Lunch of Fate. Okay. Dude. How do you fucking play? You how you play Lunch of Fate. Okay. Dude. How do you fucking play? You've never played Lunch of Fate. Just randomly clicking on your phone.

It's going to be hard to order by not looking at your phone. The problem with my orders is I go hot and cold or something. So I'll have like ten in a row of the same lunch. And then it will be ten in a row of something else. Oh, no, I'm not saying through your recent orders. You scroll down, scroll down, scroll down. Oh, on Seamless? Yeah.

Oh, so it's not something you've ordered before. No, no, no. Oh, I like that. But I was thinking you could also type a letter, and then it would be random. You have to scroll for that, like maybe the fifth. And then, yeah, yeah, yeah. See, like F4.

F4. There is a guy on... Wait, what do we do? You scroll for the type of food first? Yes, and stop. All right, wait, hold on. I'm just going to do a dry run. You guys are acting like I've lunched a faded.

Yeah. Oh, really? He does a wheel of restaurant names and then a wheel of appetizers, a wheel of entrees, a wheel of sides, a wheel of drinks. And he does that every day.

Okay. Yeah, see, I just did it. I got rigatoni, a little vodka, and white bolognese with sausage. That sounds delightful. You gotta keep tapping and tapping. Keep going. What do you mean? I don't know. I want you to have a bunch of stuff. Oh, okay. Alright, I like that. Dude Perfect's actually been doing Lunch of Fate for like

20 years now. They've been sinking ping pong balls. They're still so good. Still on season one of Dude Perfect. Season two is fun. Tyler doesn't even have the beard yet? No, and I don't know what to call him. Are you Lunch of Fading right now?

This is kind of tomorrow's thing. He's just doing a dry run. One hummus scoop from Falafel. Hummus scoop? Scoop. From Tabunet. Yeah. Okay, this will be fun.

It'll be fun, yeah. Yeah. I'm pumped. Okay. Any dentists out there, I have a mystery tooth growing in the back of my face. I want to see. That's kind of been a thing lately for me, too. Hey, can I see?

No, I'd rather not let anybody look at my mouth. You have a new tooth? Yeah, it's in the very back, and it's announced its presence with authority. It's probably a wisdom tooth. Probably so, but it's bad. I went to the dentist this morning. It's on the bottom. Go to mine.

Bite off your own adenoids. See, it just hit me right there. That hurt. You're down bad. I'm down bad, yeah. This has not been a great week. Chicago's going to be good, though, with all my new shows with my new friends yeah sponsors yeah well they'll have to be new no pre-existing relationships there i'm laughing but i'm not but i am but I'm not. But I am, but I'm not. But you are. But I'm not.

You have been. A little bit, but I'm not right now. Yeah. But I am a little bit right now. I just stopped. Okay, good. I just stopped. Laughing too much would be too much.

But maybe laughing too much, then it gets funny again. Well, we're going to try it. We're right on the edge. All right. Well, we're going to try it. We're right on the edge. All right. Well, we got a big day tomorrow. See everyone tomorrow. Oh. Yeah.

Not just for Lunch of Fate. Lunch of Fate and, yeah. You guys are putting a lot of stock into Lunch of Fate. If you're watching this right now, the whole show will be up eventually. We did have a great yak. So we were talking. The booth does a really fun thing where they don't tell us when we're not live. So we didn't know we weren't live

for a solid 20 minutes there. So yeah, it was a good yak. Go watch it. Watch the whole thing. Thanks to everyone. We'll see you tomorrow. All right. All right. We'll be right back. It's the act. It's the act.