The Yak - The Great Chick-fil-A Heist | The Yak 9-19-22

Episode Date: September 19, 2022

President = Commander in ChiefYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. It's the Yak. All the boys are back. We be yakking. Sass. KB with the new haircut. Lone.

Myself. Brandon. Nick. Owen. Zah. Stephen Che. TJ. Damn.

Everybody. The whole squad. Infinity Stone. Is it Infinity Stone? Yeah, that sounded good. When was the last time we Infinity Stoned? I think it's the full gauntlet, bro. Last week?

You had the full gauntlet, right? I think it was like last Tuesday. Oh, yeah. What? Jay was here? Oh, no. Pink-eyed Jay. You looking at my rash?

I think I was here on Tuesday. Yeah, yeah. What do we got there, Sal? I was just eyeing Sal's neck. I think he has a real malady right now. I have a rash. But I've had the rash for months. Okay.

Let's see it. He's just getting over it. Zoom in. Huh. Oh, my God, dude. You're dying. Spotted. You can't see it on the camera.

Shit. Y'all should see my arms right now, though. Let me see. I'm, like, worse. If you look up pitoriasis, like like I look like the bad examples that they show well we could see them just no

well you can see like a little bit right here what's the oh dude pteriasis what is going on he's got bad

pteriasis why do you ration I've been rationing for a month now because you wear the same thing every single day very clever

but not quite it's a real disease people suffer from it's because that Because you wear the same thing every single day? Yeah. Very clever, but not quite. It's a real disease people suffer from. It was because of that bitch-ass cowboy sweatshirt that he was wearing. Yeah. Yeah. Had to burn that shit. His ass has all types of rashes.

He's like, yeah, I bought this sweatshirt that I've worn 100 days in a row from Goodwill. No, it's a viral rash. I've never washed it. It's caused from a virus. So what's the virus? Hidriasis rosea. Can you give it to other people? No, it's not contagious. I've had it caused from a virus. So what's the virus? Hidriasis rosea. Can you give it to other people? No, it's not contagious. I've had it for over a month.

I've talked about this many times. You're a freak. No. It's natural. You're a leper. No, it's pretty normal. Remember that up, dude. The Striax.

It's not strictly topical. Seriously, you're too close to KB right now. So wait, you look like That looks Stop That looks like that? It looks His back looks exactly like that Exactly

Actually, mine might be worse than that Did you go to the doctor? Three times He said let it run its course He thought it was MPOX How long is its course? Its course can be anywhere from one to three months And the worst cases can be around a year.

That's not great. Does it hurt? No, it itches. It itches like a mofo. Itch it. Let me see you itch it. I've been itching it all day. Let me see you itch it.

You'll catch it if you're lucky. It's like a shooting star. It is. No, it's... Okay. Yeah, that was the thing they said. They said you're still allowedowed to have Body on body contact Nice

And I was like Phew Thank god You were like I was like That was my biggest concern Was I wasn't able To have body on body contact

Couldn't play shirts For skins Yeah Couldn't D up In the post If I was on like A basketball camp Right now

I'd have to be One of the kids That wears the penny When they go shirtless That boy That sucked. Would you always do that? No, I just took my shirt off and was like, this sucks.

Yeah, I did that when I was younger and I didn't know I was fat. Yeah. Then my mom took a picture of me playing and I was like, holy shit. No, that moment when it was deciding shirts and skins and being like, please, please, please be shirts. But all the big boys wore pennies. Yeah, I just went skins and it sucked. Yeah.

It might have been more of a my generation thing. What happened? Yeah. Kids got soft. All right, so what's up, guys? What's going on? Just a sass rash. We should do a rash talk.

You guys are the ones asking me about my rash. I'm curious. I am too. You're too confident about it this time. Yeah. It's been here for a month. I'm not time. Yeah. It's been here for a month. I'm not bothered by it. It's been here for a month.

What am I going to do? It's been here for months and months. You're our leper. We need to put you on an island. Yeah, probably. We just got him over his self-consciousness about this. I haven't been self-conscious about it at all. I'm self-conscious about it on my face.

Yeah, no, you can see it on your face. It's bad. You wore a sweatshirt all August. That wasn't because of the rash. It was just because I was uncomfortable. It's because he has body issues. Yeah, that's because I hate my body. The rash.

Those are two different viral. Rash is the least of my worries as far as the body goes. You can always get a new one. Skin? Body? You can. A little rash? Squatch?

A little, oh. yeah, that's funny. Funny, guys. Funny Joe. You are up now. Yeah, he's up. I thought you were up next. No, I'm up. You're up now.

Yeah. So what's up? Sass. Sass. Yeah, Sass is up. I got next. I got next. How are you boys doing? I'm i'm not good yeah what's wrong with

you you said you were grumpy what the hell are you wearing nick sweats oh you said never wear sweat he announced when he came in he's down nobody talked shit i didn't say i was down i just said i was a little cranky cranky why i said don't even ask don't fuck with him we got to figure out how why he's cranky though so don't even ask. Don't fuck with him. We got to figure out why he's cranky, though. I said don't even freaking ask. You had sweatpants. I know. I know.

I guess it's gray sweatpants season. It is. Put on print. It's close. I would actually prefer if it wasn't still in the 80s. I know, right? I don't like seeing Brandon's legs, shiny ass legs. I thought showing people my cock jiggling around as I walked would bring me up.

Two more days? Lower than ever. Nobody said a word. About your jiggly ass cock? How jiggly is it? It wiggles. It squirms. It's surprisingly jiggly for

its size, too. Well, the thing is, I could be perfectly still and it's surprisingly jiggly for its size too well the thing is i could be perfectly still and it's going yeah yeah laws of physics suspended it's like a fucking worm on a sidewalk yeah it's it's just it's going and i'm perfectly still it's tourettes of the cock it's just moving on its own constantly like a slinky going down a you can can't photograph it. It's always blurry. Yeah, there's no frame. Except for sometimes when a helicopter's propeller matches the frame rate of the camera. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was naked behind a picture of a hummingbird once. I can see. It's been a weird show I like it though This is true yak We gotta plan some shit Yeah a lot Yeah we gotta lot

Is everyone here next week? We're back Should be 23rd So that's That's Sunday I think Yeah we'll be back all next week Alright so we're gonna do

KB's Wild next week Yup I'll be here all next week Featuring Owen and Zah. Maybe Thursday? At work? Next week?

Next week, yeah. Can it be... When's the pop punk show? We're back to the fifth. Thursday might be tricky. Europa League. No, Europa League plays on Thursday. Arsenal.

Can we do it Wednesday? What time? Wait, three? 2.30. It will be the earliest time slot of anything. Let's see what time. Hold on. Let's look at the time.

Let's do some planning. We have to do our fast. Tomorrow, right? Yeah, we're here tomorrow. So, yeah. Actually, it's international break. We'll find next week. Okay, nice.

So, next Thursday. Are you good? Pop Punk? Pop Punk is on Friday, so we should be able to do it on Thursday. I can just travel afterwards. So next week you're going to have acrylic nails? Yes. Oh, dude, acrylic nails would actually be sick for the Pop Punk show.

Yeah. I would like that. But we don't play until Saturday, so it's like either I choose to have an extra day of acrylic nails to fit the aesthetic, or I get them off as soon as possible. You get them off as soon as possible. So next Monday you'll have acrylic nails. Next Thursday we'll do KB's Wild

featuring Owen and Zah. You guys got to go to Libero Nadine. I know we do. I have to figure that out. We're fasting tomorrow. I don't know if we can fast tomorrow. It's starting tomorrow like 30 minutes after the show or something like that.

30 minutes after the show. Should we start with a feast tomorrow? Oh, we should. We should eat tomorrow. We should have a feast. I would do a feast. Wednesday's episode? Yeah.

Maybe some Burmese? I had Burmese yesterday. Maybe everyone bring a food tomorrow? We got saltado when we went on the wheel the other day. Yeah, we'll have a potluck tomorrow. Everyone bring a food, and then we'll spin for who gets to eat what. Let's spin a wheel of every country, and you have to bring that dish. Ooh, I like that.

And then also a quick announcement, because I know there's probably... Are people upset that we're not doing... Oh, they're fine. People are saying why next week for Zell's Wild. Because we're not all here. Oh, and then... Or, sorry, Nick and KB are leaving on Wednesday.

Tell that person that said that to shut up. And I have an announcement. I did speak to a member, a member, adjacent member of the Yak, Frank the Tank. We're going to suspend Tank Thursdays indefinitely. He actually took it very well. Good. So he was cool with it. Good.

Wow. Okay. Yeah. So, and that will be, he did say, he was like, I like to just do one hitters every now and then, like 10 minutes. I was like, let's talk maybe in a couple months, and maybe you can do like once a month, 10 minutes, where you just get your one hitters in. Maybe write it down.

Maybe he does a set. Wow. 10 minutes. Yeah, get your one hitters in maybe write it down maybe he does a set wow 10 minutes yeah it was it was a great conversation conversation you were having out here yeah i was just like hey frank i think we should maybe suspend it for a little bit you know maybe maybe like readjust and he was like yeah that's cool i like to do like smaller amounts anyway so he was cool with it so we'll we'll figure out maybe he can do not want to overindulge yeah maybe we can do like a 10 minute thing you know i said i said we'll talk in november about the 10 minute thing right so yeah yeah i'm happy i'm i'm happy for him that it went well i'm happy for us that uh we can continue i think we were holding him back yeah we were he's got a fly he meshes better with other pieces of content

and goes down other avenues smoother. He's well-rounded. He gave us some things that we could have done better, too. Yeah. I also don't want to put anyone in a spot where maybe people don't like them. And I feel like we were getting to that spot with De'Ack and Frank.

And I still love Frank. I always love Frank. So I don't want to expose him to a spot where people are like oh this sucks because frank is is great in small doses yeah he's next up did a victory worm what the fuck did you do a victory worm yesterday he's next up i loved yesterday because he didn't tell anybody he's gonna do the victory worm yeah y'all thought he might have been having some sort of yeah medical event it was a long sunday because we had the dolphins come back was uh the dolphins having i i actually was i didn't tweet this but i was thinking it i actually think hell on earth is taking a red eye from vegas not sleeping in a bed and then watching uh the dolphins have the opening kickoff returned on

them with frank you didn't have one second it was Where was he in relation to you on the plane? No, he wasn't on the plane. I'm saying I landed. I saw my kids for a few hours. I came in to do streams all day and it was like instant. The Ravens were up seven. Nothing. Yeah.

Why did I assume he went? I don't know. I don't understand when you sleep. It's been a long two days, three days. I slept for 30 hours yesterday. I know. I need to sleep. But Vegas was fun.

It usually is. Yeah, it was a great time. You guys did great on the fight, too. Thank you. Solely shirtless. Yeah, Guido Fasoli, which we showed on Friday's Yak. Oh, they showed it on the Yak? Yeah, we showed it.

We can show it again. Dude, I walked in. When he was shirtless with his pants the same day, I walked. There was like a covered area of like where we were by the, where we were watching football. And I walked in and he was eating a full lemon like an orange.

I'd never seen anything like it. He had quartered a lemon and was sucking, like not even sucking on it. He was fully eating it to the rind. That is so normal for me to see now. Huh. Look at that. I don't see it.

He's just perfect. He's an all-around just great vibes guy. He was with us for the entire weekend in Vegas. Guy just vibes. He wore a t-shirt to an Alaskan glacier. Yeah. Doesn't like to cover the body. He said that he took off his shirt

because he had to wear the shirt later on. Smart. Yeah. Wise. Very wise. Wouldn't you guys, this was a multiple day trip as well, right? Yeah, it was.

Yeah. You just brought one shirt. I just stood up from the... Yeah, there he is. So I was sitting on one of the chairs and I stood up to get something and Fasoli was just standing there with the camera with khaki pants

and no shirt on with the biggest smile. All he does is he only needs one shirt. You can't wear one shirt all day. His carry-on's a manila folder. Yeah. He is an all-time vibes guy. Yeah, I don't think we didn't have anything remarkable happen.

We didn't go out. We just went out to two big dinners. Orged ourselves. Yeah. Ate a bunch. Got some appetizers. What kind of dinner? Steak? Steak. Steak Steak and steak Second night I got to Dover, Seoul Turf and turf Can't even tell you what that is

I did get You got a man from Delaware The only thing that happened that really hurt my feelings Was we went out to dinner Friday night It was me Dave Roan

Jack McCarthy Who else was there? Spider Spider And uh Robbie Robbie And they came And the waiter Jeroen, Jack McCarthy. Who else was there? Spider. Spider. Robbie. Robbie. And they came, and the waiter was like, I'm going to need to see some ID for the drinks,

and he just pointed to everyone but me and Dave, and it really was like, shit. Like, skipped over. Like, I was sitting next to Spider. I don't think he checks out. Spider and Jack McCarthy, but he literally pointed to him, skipped over me, and pointed to Jack McCarthy. Well, I mean, Jack McCarthy's like 23. No, I know. It still hurts. I'm in my mid-30s.

I'm the one who should be. You're the boyish. You're boyish. I'm a bitch. Listen, I understand it, but it still hurts to get skipped over. Yeah, I guess. It's like you and you, not you. Wouldn't like that.

Yeah. It was fun. We were somewhere a couple months ago, and KB didn't have his ID, and they wouldn't serve you. Not you. Wouldn't like that. We were somewhere a couple months ago and KB didn't have his ID and they wouldn't serve you. Remember that? They would not let Kyle into a Barstool vs. Barstool happy hour. Yeah, it was the Tampa happy hour. I forgot my ID.

Wait, that was our happy hour? It was the Barstool happy hour. I mean, it was like the event and I had to wait. Shit. We had that moment on Thursday. We went to a steakhouse, and it was in a casino, so they ID'd us in front, and Fasoli forgot his ID,

and the game was on. So I just looked at Fasoli. I was like, dude, I kind of have to watch the game. I'm not standing out here with you. He's like, cool. And then he just showed up like 20 minutes later, like, what happened? He's like, I just smiled smiled and they finally let me in.

Like, okay, that checks out. That's exactly what he did. They should make the ID accessible on the phone like Apple Pay. I'm surprised they don't already have that, honestly. Why don't they? This hotel that we stayed at was the first time I'd ever used a room key that was just your phone

and you just put your phone in. Which was awesome. Yeah, but the only problem with that is just your phone, and you just put your phone in. Which was awesome. Yeah, but the only problem with that is then your phone dies. Well. Because our apartment used to be like that, where the key was only on your phone, and if your phone died, you were just locked out. You've never even sat like that before. Yeah. Is that because of the rash?

Yeah, the rash. Actually, no. It's nowhere below the torso. Oh, it's a torso. It's only an upper body rash. Good. I'm less worried now. Oh, yeah.

What? I'm less worried about you now. Oh, thank you. It doesn't affect your legs or penis. It does not affect the penis, which is nice. He's been retaining. Penis? A semen retention program.

A semen retention program. He hasn't been touching his penis even to pee. Get that IT going. Yeah, very high T. He's 90% semen right now. I really want to take some testosterone. Semen and rash. Can you get me some, KB?

I need some. So let's get some. I tried the creatine, not for me. When? What was wrong with it? It was like a week trial. It made me feel too flushed throughout the day. You got to do it for two weeks for it to kick in.

Really? Yeah, I'm not doing that. Actually, I think it might be more than that. I think it's like three weeks. Don't need it. Nope. It doesn't really do that much. People like to act like it's like a steroid,

but it really just puts more water in your muscles so that it heals them faster so you can do more aggressive lifts. Yeah, I would take the creatine and not lift. Yeah. I tried that. It feels good. It's like a good stimulant.

Ronan and I went to the gym on Friday. Wow. You saw each other in the gym. Kind of awkward. Oh, wait. You both went independently. Huh? Just happened.

We saw each other. And Big Cat was lifting weights and I was walking on a treadmill. He didn't realize I had just finished walking. I did a mile in 16 minutes. Did you only lift weights because Roan showed up? No, I was lifting. He was getting it. He was getting it.

And it was like a Vegas gym, so all the dudes were like in their early 70s. They all looked like Jerry Blavitt. We were jacked. We weren't. Yeah, 70-year-old Jack. He was the Gator with the heater. Philadelphia radio legend. I don't know why you don't know him.

Damn. My bad. You're going to the Birds game tonight, Roan. I think I am going to the Birds game. It's Vidalberg. Roan is going. White's got the ticket? Yeah.

Fuck yes. He's so down. Yeah, he is. Down for everything. He's an absolute legend. Are you going, Sass? No, I wasn't invited. I was. I know. I had a feeling, Sass? No, I wasn't invited. I was.

I know. I had a feeling. Sass, you're fucking hilarious, dude. What the fuck? I would have loved to go. I mean, Rowan knows me. I'm a Philly guy at heart. Penn State guy, sharpest.

I've been rooting for Penn State and the Eagles constantly, but my invitation was lost. Talk about Penn State, Brandon. They're good. Auburn won't tweet. I said it last week. They won't? No, I've been-

41-12 on Twitter. You have them won, Seth. What? You have them won. You have them won? Yeah. One up me there. Sass power rankings?

Sass power rankings. Damn. I respect those rankings more than anything. You should. Yeah. And Steven's got a team full of scumbags that fights and gets suspended. Yeah. He was harassing our quarterback.

What do you expect him to do? He literally said to the rest right after, he said, that's Tom Brady, what do you want me to do? Not punch somebody? Yeah. You can't control yourself professionally? He saw Leonard Fournette get punched, and Lattimore's going up to Tom Brady, so he defended his guy, which I respect.

And then you passed over the gang rapist in the draft. Oh yeah that's true. We did. And our punters didn't tell anybody though but you did

pass over him. Credit to you guys. I think that KB and Steven should have a haircut off. I think that KB's kind of dances on Steven's.

A little bit more volume. You guys can't see the back either it looks good. It's just so playful in the front. Yeah, it looks good. So nice.

Like devil may care. Where'd you go? I go to Chelsea Gardens. I switched from the Russian to the Uzbeki. Oh, nice. The Russian was good, though. When there wasn't. You didn't like them?

They're all Russian, I think. Yeah. I thought it was great. They don't talk to you? Yeah, some of them do. They see my cauliflower ear, then it's the same segment every time. Oh, yeah. Can't hear a word they say.

You can't hear accents. I can't understand. If you have the slightest accent, I can't decipher what you're saying. Not a thing, yeah. My Russian barber, last time I i went in had a stoolie recognized me and then i had to spend 30 minutes explaining to him what a podcast was he didn't understand it he's like so it's like slow down music it's like radio dude where do i get it i was like you just get your phone he's like for free have you guys noticed that there's like uh people pretend

russians who are pretending to be Ukrainian? Oh. So they can get, like. Ross Plains? How do I go about looking out for this? It was a barber. It was a barber that did it. And he was like, I just got here from Ukraine. Oh, shit.

Oh. No, you didn't. Smart as fuck. Yeah, it is. Very smart. Yeah, because the sympathy, you'd think it was through the roof, but I have no sympathy for the Ukraine. This is the plot of Argo. Yeah, it really is, huh?

Isn't Ukraine, like, low-key winning the war now? They are winning. Yeah. Yeah, I think. Damn. Good for them. I had an Uber driver saying that. They're just in a four-corner stall right now.

They're slowing it down. They're running out of the shot clock. They're taking all the possessions. They're taking the air out of the war. Isn't something going on right now, though? Like, they found, They found a mass burial, like a mass grave. That's not good.

With the Russians. War is the most boring thing that should be the least boring thing. The first night when they posted that video of the explosions, everyone was like, holy shit, World War III is starting.

And then it's like, it's still going on? We're still doing this? Yeah. I still have my avatars of Ukrainian flag. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck. I saw, when I was home this weekend, people had flags, like Ukrainian flags.

Really? Yeah. Yeah, it's like, get the dick out of your mouth, dude. What? Yeah. They're not going to fuck you. What? That's so insane that we're just dick-eating for fucking Ukraine like that.

They got, like, Galenski, right? Yeah. It's like on the cover of Vogue. He's going to get canceled at some point. Isn't he a comedian? He's an actor, right? I hope we find some sketch where he did blackface. It has to be.

We would have found it by now. Oh, he's Ukrainian. I don't think they care. I think that's just their thing. With the rubble of war, they could probably just do that. Rubble of war. Rubble of war. Rubble of war. We're saying something about him.

We played a president on a show, and I think they were like, yeah, let's roll with it. Yeah, yeah. I like that. We should do that. They just fucked with him so much. Martin Sheen is our president. Wouldn't that mean Kevin Spacey would be president? Yeah, do you want that?

At least Brandon. There's a lot more presidents. Brandon just voted for Kevin Spacey. I said Martin Sheen. Brandon Walker, Kevin Spacey. Will said Martin Sheen. Brandon Walker. Will you run with him? Bill Pullman. Can you make it as a 2024 ticket?

Spacey Walker. Morgan Freeman could be our president. He's played a president before. I think he wants to be Kevin Spacey. Ooh, Sass has a good Obama. Yeah, come on. I finally got it. When did Morgan Freeman play president?

Deep Impact. Oh, okay. Come on. come on. I finally got it. When did Morgan Freeman play president? Deep Impact. Oh, okay. Come on. Come on. As in, what's it called? The White House has fallen or Olympus has fallen, whatever that one was. Plays like the commander in chief or something. That would be the president.

Sometimes it's just unintentional, too. Plays something. Not the commander in chief. He plays something where he becomes the president because the president is like... Or he's the joint chief of staff. Maybe chief of staff. Something stupid like that. I don't give a fuck.

Some nerd job. Yeah. I don't really pay... We don't really do politics here at Barstool, so I don't really understand what that is. I don't really know the Commander Chief stuff. I might steer away from that. Commander Chief. Roback.

Roback.com. Use code YAK for 20% off your first purchase through the end of the week. R-H-O-B-A-C-K. Q-Zips, polos, joggers, new joggers. Here's the season.

Promo code YAK. I'm going to be heavy on joggers this fall. Their hoodie is the best thing I own, I would say. Their polo is the best thing I own. I fucking love it. Yeah, it's like rocking on this weekend, I think. Award to the upfronts. I looked great.

You did. The hoodie is slimming as hell. It's slimming, but you look athletic in it. Yes, that's how I look. That's huge. That's huge. I don't know. Something about the fucking taper.

You guys had Francis on the other day. We did. What's he been doing? He clashed with Tank Thursday. I kind of enjoyed it to some extent. It was a good clash. He's just coming off a honeymoon in Africa. He's hot.

You talked to me about it. Fresh. He's hot. He's at talk to me about it. He's fresh. He's hot. He's at the top of his game right now. Yeah. He's getting in here at like 8 a.m. He took my desk. Yeah.

Deservingly so. Where were you? What do you mean deservingly so? I was driving in. Maybe get here earlier. I got to get here at 7.30 in the morning to sit at my own desk? Yeah. I paid $200 for that desk.

That's why I always get here early. I'm afraid someone's going to take my own desk? Yeah. I paid $200 for that desk. That's why I always get here early. I'm afraid someone's going to take my desk. Every day. Clemmer was eyeing your desk the other day. You got to work like your desk is going to be taken at any moment. Yeah. And you didn't do anything to stop him either.

What am I going to do? You sit beside me. I forgot you're down, my man. Yeah, he's down. What's going on? You sit beside me. Nick? down. What's going on? You sit beside me. Nick? What?

What's going on? Just a little tuckered out is all. Too much Max this weekend? Yeah. What is that? He did the whole trilogy. Oh, yeah. It's the bonus book. Yeah, I'm really tuckered out.

I read all his works. You were streaming yesterday? I came in a little bit later. Nick helps with the Boomers, which is awesome. It's fun to do. He's tuckered out, though. The Steelers, sorry. It was a boring team in the NFL.

Well, them are the Patriots, and they played yesterday. Those are the two most boring teams. Dude, the Colts suck. Suck. The Jags are pretty good, though. But the Jets most boring teams. Dude, the Colts suck. Suck. Yeah. The Jags are pretty good, though. But the Jets can't be. Unreal.

Surreal, honestly. I mean, Chubb's got to. I saw Jeff D. Lowe at that tailgate. You can't blame Chubb on that, right? That's crazy. Yeah, he should have gone down. Chubb scored a touchdown. I saw Jeff D. Lowe at that tailgate with the dude with the boner on the massage table.

Oh, yeah. That was funny as fuck. That was hilarious. Wait, what? There was a mannequin with a boner with like a little towel over it.

It said, happy endings aren't illegal. That cracked me up. I thought that was funny. All in. People hated it. Sean over the iconic big dick.

Yeah. Ooh, that guy's dead now. And there was another, I saw another couple That had Personalized Deshaun Watson jerseys One of them said rub The other said tug

Jesus That's That's kind of funny though That's hilarious Just going for it I would buy that I don't think they'll be that phase I think it'll be just

No they're not Next week will be the same That's the beauty of the Browns Yeah I don't think they're that upset About the loss I think they were Now they're like Alright They're still gonna have fun With the rest of the Browns. Yeah. I don't think they're that upset. About the loss? I think they were. Now they're like, all right, they're still going to have fun with the rest of the season.

Yeah. Yeah, you're right, man. I don't think Browns fans ever have fun. Just go out and have fun. I don't know. Maybe not. Oh, jeez. Oh, damn.

That turned quick. Fuck. Browns just went from power ranking just have fun to maybe not. Yeah, me. God damn. Are you going to root for Deshaun when he comes back? Is it like, you know, he's just living his own life, or do you want him to kind of pay some kind of remunerations?

For what? I don't know. Where do you think he's at right now? Do you think he is, like, trying to Where do you think he's at right now? Do you think he is, like, trying to... Do you think he's apologetic? No, I think he's trying to figure out a way to get new massages. He has to be. He's, like, doing NDAs.

It's crazy. If he just went to regular sex work, it would have been fine. Yes. Yeah. I also just think that you don't lose whatever he has. The itch? The itch to get jerked off at a massage table. Like eating human flesh. Yeah, you don't lose whatever he has. The itch? The itch to get jerked off at a massage table. Like eating human flesh.

Yeah, you're not like, oh, I'm cured because I got reprimanded. It's the same reason Bob Kraft went to a $55 rub and tug. Right. He's worth billions. Thrill. Yeah, there's something in it, I guess, for these folk. They want to get caught. They just want to be a regular guy for a second.

Show up to a rub and tug. Yeah, he could have just been unfaithful like the rest of the league. My TikTok algorithm is all guys like filming masseuses walk in for their rub and tug. Oh. Yeah, it's strange. That's a weird algorithm. The algorithm is perfect, so

it's like, what have you been doing? You go to the bathhouse a lot. I do. We're back. Go to a lot of bathhouses. You're right. You could probably get a rub and tug there. Oh, yeah.

Has a guy ever hit on you at a bathhouse? One. One time. Then I left the sauna, and then I came back into that same one, and he moved on to Feidelberg. Ah, nice. Rudy got reverse rub and tugged. He had a bathhouse. They jerked him off, or they jerked off on him.

What? What's a reverse rub and tug? Didn't Rudy go into the sauna and they were jerking? A dude was jerking off. No, a dude followed him in. Yeah. He was like, well, why did you go in if you didn't want me to follow you in and jerk off at you? Yeah.

I think Rudy was so nice. He's like, I'm complimented, but he just old-time hockeyed him. He's like, hey, buddy. This isn't your body to jerk off to, buddy. And we played some NHL. Old-time hockey rules. Yeah, old-time hockey is the best. I had a guy once look over the shower shower stall at a gym locker room and i was

like what are you doing and he's like oh sorry and then he did it again i was like what are you doing and then he like we i went and got clothed and he like kept on looking at me i was like dude there's a kid what's going on you're radiating there's a kid my freshman year at penn state and he was just uh he was just a tall kid in the dorm, and we just called him the bird watcher because he would look up. But he never did it, but it just stuck with him. If you would just call that guy the bird watcher, it would have humbled him real quick. Yeah, that's true.

Did any of you guys have nicknames in college that you want to share with us? No, I've never had a nickname. The Wizard of Oz. Oh. Oh. Oh, my God. Did you just come up with that on the spot? Or was that... You've been waiting to use that one for a while?

He said that so quickly, I just believe it. How'd you get that nickname? What? What? Good masseuse. Did you guys see that video of Bryson DeChambeau just getting bodied by a rope? Yeah, that was so embarrassing. He didn't even get hit that hard to go down the way he did.

Down on a knee. He like ripped the towel away from the ground. All the way down. It was so fucking funny. Like it was a minor inconvenience, Bryson. He said it hit him in his eye. It was like the most narrow piece of string. This shit's so embarrassing. Oh, wait.

No, it's fine. You're fine. Oh, no. Like look at the asshole, like the dickish way he grabs the towel from his guy. It's so fucked up. His caddy like tries to talk to him. What? What?

Right in my eye. That's an embarrassment injury. He's not injured. Yeah. Take a second. Take a second. He's already taken many seconds. Take a second.

Rope caught in the eye. Rope caught? Oh the eye. Rope caught him in the eye. Yeah, so good. The serious guy being like, rope caught him in the eye. Didn't you see from the other angle the rope didn't catch him? Yeah, it didn't get him at all. That string. Rope caught him in the eye.

Like a loose rope, too. That was a great one line by whoever that was being like, yeah, I don't think he's going to survive. Rope caught him in the eye. Look at this. Oh, dude. It gets like the side of his face. That's so embarrassing. It's like walking through a glass door.

Yeah. You can't. You're not hurt. You're just so embarrassed. His head even went back like he got shot. Right to a knee. It does look like. Play it again.

I want to see the shit again. The shit was so funny. Shit. What the fuck, guys? Oh, my God. That's outrageous. I can't see. I can't see.

That's so embarrassing. That's mortifying. At first, I thought he was telling the dude to shut up. I thought I was telling his cat, shut up. Shit. Shit. He just immediately blames everybody else. What the fuck, guys?

That's what I thought he was doing. I really thought he was getting pissed off at other people. I was younger. Yeah, you go. No, it's all you. Okay. Take it. Take it. No, no, no. I know you had this one planned. It's the one you said that you had written. No, no, no. No, it's all you. Okay. Take it, take it.

No, no, no. I know you had this one planned. It's the one you said that you had written. No, no, no. No, no, hit this. This is going to be good. 135. When you were younger, the...

No, it's a dumb story. Sounds good. Shady race. Stupid story. Shady race. Shady. It's like that... When that dude baked Alaska got maced in the face.

Oh, yeah. He was pouring milk in his eyes. That shit ruled. We had baked Alaska this past weekend. Yeah. Dessert. Yeah. It was baked Alaska.

It's like a rum cake. It's like a multi-layered, multi-colored, dense cake that has rum poured on the top of it. I felt so bad for the waiter because he lights it on fire and it's a whole show and he brought it out during the chargers trying to cover the spread in their last drive and he was just doing this whole show and we're like, dude, get out of the way.

Yeah. Move. We can't see the team. The chef came out. The highlight of his day. The chef came out to do a shot and no one even looked at him. It was so disrespectful so disrespectful you guys have a boozy brunch i have beef with kate oh no anyone has beef it's me why i was in i missed i didn't get invited yes you did what i did not it didn't happen right yes? Yes, it did.

We were there with like 12 people, and Kate went over to a different table and took the picture. No, don't do that. Then I got lampooned all weekend. Kyle was still at the office. I was at the office, no, and waiting for this brunch, and then I emerged from a side room to nobody. What? You emerged from the breastfeeding room. One man was there.

Clemmer was there. We were both looking for the crew. We thought they were across the street. When was this? On St. Harry's. Friday. Damn, you guys really did boozy, bro. Yeah, we did.

No, I saw Clemmer today fucking force choking intern Coleman from across the fucking street. I thought it was there. I was like, what is happening? So who went? Who was the crew? For what? Who's the brunch?

Me. Actually, Kate didn't go. That was Photoshopped. She left us. It was me, Francis, Pat, Hubs, Nate, Feidelberg. John Rich. John Rich, John Rich, and Donnie.

And Donnie. Classic crew. Wow. Yeah, so it happened. And was it boozy? I missed it. It got very boozy, very fast. Did anyone get disinvited?

No. So everybody was in who wanted to be in? We walked out of the content area. We were like, alright, anybody who wants to come, come. Who's your brunch? Oh. Is PFT there? I missed that. PFT was there. Wow, you missed him.

Yikes. He's probably pissed. That's fucked up. What'd you guys get? What did everyone get? I got a natural light. No, I got a Bud Light. No brunch? We got like sliders oh and guac that's a lunch that's like a boozy it was a straight up boozy lunch well no brunch is the mindset no what time is it a 2 30 okay i think brunch is if there's eggs available yeah i think it could be at 5 30 p.. Pancake or an egg has to be eaten. French toaster.

Everybody else got these double gins. Double matrix. Was Tommy there? Double Hendrix. Yeah, Tommy was there too. Oh, Jesus. Who else was there? Tommy's always making everyone get these weird-ass drinks.

Tommy got a Cosmo. Yeah, he likes a fruity. That was the shape of the glass. That sign language was fruity. That was the shape of the glass. That was the shape of the glass. It tapers up. That actually might be how you say that in sign language. Maybe so. Cosmo.

I'll have a Cosmo. Cosmo. We got to spin this wheel. Maybe he came over. I had a 25-ounce white claw for you. Oh. Yeah. No, I had one of your Montauks.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We watched Naked Gone. Naked Gone. Was there a ball in your crotch? 1988 comedy. Oh, yeah. KB, what's the pig ball? Was there a ball in your crotch?

Oh, I got a... This is for Three Sheets Saloon. Their pong tables only have the real cheap ones that dent easy. They carry your own. In case you go. But, yeah. I like to play every once in a while and the balls suck. Was it resting in your nuts?

I'm just going to save it. Warms it up. I'm going to need a second. Oh wow, that is your own ball. Warm? Have you ever lit one of those on fire? Well, that's when it gets dented. If you hold the one of those on fire? Well, that's what I do. It gets dented. Awesome.

If you hold the lighter close enough, you can undent it. But you can also just light it on fire. It stinks to high heaven, but looks cool as hell. Did you ever cut them in half and put them over your eyes, and then if you have a red light bulb, apparently you trip? That was a thing. What? No.

Put it on the wheel? This is a great ping pong ball. It is. It's a fun game. I'd like to test it. I understand. What's the name of the place you go against? Look at that.

Actually, now I saw it in purpose. Three Sheets Saloon? Three Sheets Saloon. Really? Where is it? By Washington Square Park. Off McDougal, yeah. You should play a little pong?

Yeah. Nice. How's it going? It's been so mentally sound and right as of late. I have a ping pong table at my house if y'all want to come over and play. No thanks. Is your house way bigger? Way bigger.

Is it way doper? Way bigger. Way doper, yeah. Twice the size it used to be. You get two tables. I only have one. Has Tommy got the layout yet? Because it is his house.

Tommy owns the downstairs, yeah. Oh, nice. Yeah. Is it going to convince your family to stay up in the north now that y'all are rich folk? I was waking up yesterday, and Tommy was on a computer game. And I've been watching his language. I just hear him go, that's why you're a fucking bitch. Who are you talking to that you've got to call him a fucking bitch?

What game was it? I have Roblox or something. Were you playing Roblox? I don't know. That's a bad path. Does that have the in-game purchases? What is this? It's my Instagram story.

I don't know. I don't know. I think he is. I thought he was. Where is that from? He's up next out of Atlanta. We've been talking about who's next up out of Atlanta. There he is.

Even if I didn't know Tommy Walker, that would be my favorite picture of all time. Tommy's Varsity? Yeah. I like the little blade of grass. I think that's my favorite. Or the red boots. Oh, I didn't even see the blade of grass. Yep, it's a good photo.

He's been eating grass. I think that's my favorite. Or the red boots. Oh, I didn't even see the blade of grass. Yep, it's a good photo. He's been eating grass. Look at those beautiful eyelashes. I know, man. It's next up. Heavy lashes. I asked the question. I don't know if he is for sure. Oh, I think he is. Yeah, I think he's got Atlanta on lock. Gene Markeith has South Georgia.

And North Florida, somehow. Yes, took a Revell. He's got that whole town on lock. Damn, And North Florida somehow. Yes, took a Revell. Fuck. Got that old town on lock. Damn. That's just incredible. He's handsome. Where'd you find that boy?

Yeah. Yeah, where did you find him? He's just been like that since the beginning. So how long has he been playing Roblox for? Oh, years. How much money have you put into that? It's thousands. Does he know about Jewish people yet?

I'll be a tough conversation for him. It's going to be a very tough conversation. What? And they drink blood? They have the banks and the entertainment? But I need them for lawyering?

Okay, whatever you say, Dad. Tommy Walker learns the world. Oh, so I did sneak up behind him one night to see what he was typing to somebody. And he was talking to this little girl, and he was saying, I'm Tommy Walker from Barstool. Oh, shut up. Yes. And what do you mean? He texted her?

He was texting her? Already? And the girl went, what's Barstool? And he tried to explain it. He's like, it's a big company. It's a big company is what he said. And I was like, Tommy, you can't be telling people you're Tommy from Barstool. Oh, he can. He can. How would they know him? He is. And I was like, Tommy, you can't be telling people you're Tommy from Barstool. No, he can.

He can. How would they know him? He is. Well, they wouldn't, but I don't. I think Tommy has like fans that are his age. Not his age. His fans are all like adult males. When Tommy becomes of age, I want him to have my phone number.

And if he ever needs to like be verified, Barstool. He can call at any time. He's like at a club. He's like, I know Big Cat. He can call at any time. He's like at a club. He's like, I know Big Cat. He can call. Downstarve while he's drinking. They're like, you don't know Big Cat. You can FaceTime me. This is like next year, by the way. Can you get him an Instagram blue check?

Yeah, probably Gaz can. How old is he? 12. Yeah, I think 13. 15-year-old Steve was like a person. Yeah, that's true. He still is. Yeah. be. 15-year-old Steve was like a person. Yeah, that's true. He still is. Yeah, as a 15-year-old. Hey, it's Tommy Walker.

If that ass fat can't be going to have that. He picked up his briefcase. Went to work. Oh, man. Tommy from Barstool is so funny. He's next up, man. He is. He told a girl he was Tommy from Barstool is so funny. He's next up, man. He is. He told a girl he was Tommy from Barstool.

That's so funny. He was right. The girl on Roblox? Yeah, I guess. Oh. We're actively looking for Roblox influencers. It's true. Yeah, that was in an email. Yeah, I got an email.

We got an email from Erica months ago, and it was just anyone here played Roblox. He's learning to talk smack from Myers Leonard. Oh, no. You see, how about Mark Sanchez? That was funny. What did he say? Talking about porn or something?

Yeah, he was like, they're closing up. I don't know. Cleared it faster. He cleared that hole faster than a teen clears his search history when their parents come in. He said that on broadcast? Yeah. That's pretty funny. Yeah, it is.

But he must be clearing his search history. Yeah, because he likes teens. What's his frame of reference, though? He doesn't have kids. It must be him. He likes teens. Growing up. Didn't he like teens?

Dated at 17 years old. Someone said that, yeah. Seinfeld did it. Imagine a teen thinking they're a pedophile because they like other teens. He's clearing his search history. Like a child insult because his teacher wouldn't fuck him. No, you're just not old enough to have sex yet. You're not an intel, dude.

All fucking women are the same. That's definitely why Andrew Tate popped off for 12-year-olds. Yeah. Yeah. They haven't been fucking me. Yeah. You don't have pubes. When did y'all notice other people having pubes?

I think eighth grade. I was eighth grade. I got quizzed about it by my neighbor. Seventh. Seventh sounds right. I was bare skin in eighth grade. I was eighth grade. I got quizzed about it by my neighbor. Seventh? Seventh sounds right. I was bare skin in eighth grade. Not a single hair. You got that rash down there?

No. He went over that. Oh, but... It's because he has been... No, I don't. It's because he's retaining his... It's nowhere below my waist. How does it know how to stop?

Yeah. It's just where it goes. Wait, where is it? Your rash is so disgusted by your own penis. Yeah, it won't touch it. No, thank you. It's so straight it goes. Wait, where is it? Your rash is so disgusted by your own penis. Yeah, it won't touch it. No, thank you. So straight that it won't touch dick. Straight ass rash. It's all on my arms.

On my, right over here on my shoulders, all over my back. Everywhere on my back. And it's on my chest, too, but not as bad. You gotta get a tattoo. You gonna have scars? Uh, no, but I'll have dark You've got to get a tattoo. You're going to have scars? No, but I'll have dark spots for a little while, they said. Just take it off your shirt and let's see it.

No. I put together some money for you to take off your shirt. Or stick out a breakout year, though. Yeah, good stats. Yeah. Yeah, dude. Crazy breakout. Dude, I love whenever Riley puts up his stats

from the weekend oh yeah what are they I haven't seen them just be like sometimes well he'll be like 15 cig smoked

like 45 beers drank three girls talked to damn but then sometimes it'll be like one sex had

what okay my goodness honest man yeah he's honest. He's not lying. That's what makes me think. Oh, wow.

One sex, dude. Look at that. Oh. What? Riley, you bastard. Imagine that girl following him on Instagram. Wait, what? You're fucking with me.

Is that his own high school football highlights? Yeah, he shows his huddle to people. Oh, okay. All right. Zero cars. That's people. Oh, okay. All right. Zero car street. That's good. That's funny. That's responsible.

Five zinc cans? That's a lot of zinc cans. Six zinc cans, wasn't it? Is one believing there's only one sex? Is that more or less progressive? Oh. Oh. They're all the same sex.

Most progressive. Yeah, most progressive. You see, there was guys who were getting the surgery to be taller. Yeah. Saw the article. Through COVID, during COVID lockdown, they're like, here's my chance to get reconstructive surgery to break my legs and have six months where I can't walk just so I can be two inches taller.

I think Zaha has it. Oh, yeah. You knew that? Yeah. We got to do a shot out of that. There's also a ton of shoes now that give you two inches no problem. Nick, remember when you wore those? I wore lifts for a little bit.

Out of nowhere. Yeah. I just walked in the office one day with lifts. That was so funny. I was like 6'8". I actually wore them out a couple times. Oh, you did? Yeah, and I unintentionally met someone else

who had them. Oh, no. This guy was super wasted talking to me at a bar and he fell off his stool. Fell off his shoes. He had Jordans on, the Carolina blue ones, whatever they are. The lift was showing.

Oh, no. Yeah, wear them. Also, can I just clarify? Because I got heat the last time they tried to cancel me, the dwarf community. It was to straighten my bow legs, not for the actual display. There we go. They tried to do that? The dwarf community.

How the fuck can you go after the dwarf community on your behalf? I'm banned from the TikTok creator fund for six months. I'm done in less than a month. I was banned in like spring. Why? Because of Big Dwarf? Oh. And I was explaining what the difference between me and him.

You should be able to say that. Yeah. But yeah. Sorry. Zaz just got all the words. Yeah, I was going to say, he's hoarding them all. He's got the M. He's got the N.

He's got quite the collection. Yeah. I can fucking say every word in the book. Four eyes. These dudes got him in like 2020, the surgeries, and they're still limping around and can barely walk. Instead of making fun of them for being losers, people on Twitter were saying that's gender reaffirming surgery. What?

Should we get Mark Norman in here to get our comedian stretch going? He just walked over to the bathroom. He's walking confident as fuck. Yeah. He did walk in confident. He had the sunglasses in the mouth. Ultimate cool guy move.

It's short to walk that confident. He's got a... I'm not familiar with his work. He's a podcaster? Com stand-up. He's like one of the funniest stand-ups. He just has the tightest writing of it. How do we feel?

Do we feel like we can do this? No. Oh, this is not for us. It's not today with Nick's whole... Nick's got you going on, dude. I feel like we've been on a hot streak. He's got a rash. I don't know.

He walked the other way, too. If you're going to see me, it's over. He was sprinting away like that dude who... Stephen Che, who hit on, what did he hit on your wife? Justin Long hit on your wife? No,

he hit on her pussy. Hit on her pussy. I fucked her pussy. Yeah, I fucked her pussy. I fucked her pussy. No, no,

no, no, no. Oh, man. Justin Long sprinted out of here that day too. His people got him and took him out the back way.

Well, he's a bitch. Well, Che's wife was waiting out there for him. They airlifted him out. I think I looked at that guy's wife's pussy. Oh, no. Come out. Hurry, hurry, hurry. Where do I recognize that guy?

Oh, yeah. His wife's vagina. I know. I know him anywhere. When you get home, look at her pussy. Say, it's from me. Say, Justin says hi. Oh, man.

This guy. We met him before. We had him on before. What? What? We had him on before. Yeah, I think we did. We have had him on before.

Is Mark Norman taking a shit? He was at Elf. No, he was walking out. Oh, he walked out the other way. Sam Morrell was here, so I'm assuming they're doing something. Is he here right now? Yeah, I saw him when we were walking.

Oh, he was on like a local Pittsburgh morning news show and was like talking about how his uncle raped him. It was very funny.

Sorry, Blatman. The five and a half is out today. Short ass scene. I saw that, KB. It was very funny I love when people do when they

when comedians go on those local shows yeah I'm so girl used to do that a lot and it was hilarious remember the dude who did it

and he would like prank him what was K-Stress do you remember do you don't remember like maybe it was like seven or eight videos see if you can find

K-Stress he would go on and he would like pretend to be an expert on something oh yeah he just would he would pretend to be an expert on something. Oh, yeah. He would fumble the whole presentation and be like, I'm so nervous.

I'm sorry. I think he did yo-yo tricks. He didn't know how to do yo-yo. You remember Twitter user AtFart? Yeah. Yeah. He went on a news program to talk about Edward Snowden, but he just talked about Edward Scissorhands. Yeah, here's Case Tracks. Good morning, four states.

It is finally Friday morning. Case Tracks is back with us again from Zip Zap. We thank you for joining us this morning. You've got your hands full of yo-yos right now. You've got, what, four yo-yos per hand, right? Right, and what I do is it's called the Blue Flying Angel. Okay. Do I need to get out of the way for this?

Yes, you do. What I'll do is, I'll get into the room and the kids will be running around and they'll be all excited. And so I try to start things off on their level and try to hook them with something like a rap okay so it's uh and it's kind of clever because it includes me okay um and it goes hey they're up in the sky it's the uh k strass the yo-yo guy and then i do the you know and i get them going and I get them into it. Once I do that, they are ready to learn. You're ready to do the trick? Absolutely.

I'm going to get out of the way here. All right. Case Ross, go ahead and take it away. I usually have a headpiece for this. No, for effect. Okay. Because I act like I'm in a Blue Angel. Okay.

So I say, air traffic control, we are ready for takeoff. All right, 10-4, guys. Let's roll. So you get that one going. Oops. Lost one. And then we're going, and we get worrying worrying and we're like, all right everybody, let's take it down to the ground and we'll get into a Huey.

And we get going. Oops. All right everyone, we're going to switch it off here, and let's bring it back home for a clean landing. 10-4. He did other ones, too. You okay? Yeah, I got very dizzy.

This guy is totally unassuming. Totally fucking with him. But he was on there before? I don't know if he was on there, but he's done a bunch of morning news and shit. He's fucking funny. Remember that guy who puked on the morning news, too? The morning news is great. Local morning news.

Yeah, how did he even contact them? I don't know. He's like, hey, I got this good yo-yo trick that I do. We should put that on the wheel. You have to go on the morning news as an expert or something? Fuck. That would be so good. That would be fucking hilarious if we could work it out.

Who's that? It's that guy. Is he Mark Norman? Yeah. Do you want me to grab him? Walk him in? We're not good enough. No.

We're taking millions. We're going to be a big try. I don't feel worthy. We're not ready. We're not ready. No, no, no. Pussies. We're p good enough No We're taking millions It's gonna be a big try I don't feel worthy Pussies We're pussies No no no no no I'm still smarting after The Michael B. Jordan shit dude

Oh yeah Crush that I got embarrassed By that disowned lady And the whole time She like fucking Kept kicking me out dude It was fucking bad

It hurt my self confidence badly Do we have that clip? Let's see if we have the clip. Seth, can you talk about Shady Rose? We don't know who he's with. Oh, look, there's Ronan Caleb. They're doing a good job. Can we go to him?

Oh, yeah. Oh, there's Ronan Caleb. Great, isn't it? Can we go to Ronan Caleb? Look at Ronan Caleb with a great interview back there. Yeah. Just interview him from back there. Hell yeah.

You really never know. Our guys are getting all the people. We're at Ronan Caleb. Go ahead. You mind if we grab you for an interview? You mind if we grab you for a quick interview? Michael B. Jordan ignoring him. We just want one with you, bro.

All right, we just love the necklace, bro. That's all we wanted to say, bro. Appreciate you. He said no. He said, we just love the necklace, bro. That's all we wanted to say, bro. Appreciate you. He said no. He said no. He said no. We tried. I was kind of a pussy, to be honest.

Great interview. That's the start. That was a great interview. How many of you joined? Thank you for the year. Oh, bro, doing the fake out. This is good. Stand behind him.

Oh, damn. He was not out. First, he didn't run. Get some punches going. Try again. Okay, okay. Michael B. Jordan's like, who the fuck are these guys? Did you get pushed, Ron?

Yeah. You're the best in the biz. Maybe do a Sunday conversation real quick. Yeah, Roan, get one more shot. I think Roan's got one more shot. I would have had you do this forever. Let's see. Once you were saying that, I was like, I can't say no.

Roan, you got this time. Go to Roan. Go to Roan. Go to Roan. Come back here. Oh, she's huge. Oh, man. You got shoved away.

You got shooed away. That rules. That was so fucking good. Yeah. There's also footage of live event Lisa getting pushed away from Joe Rogan. Really? I don't know. Not actually.

Oh, damn, KB. I'm sorry. What was the crowd like? What type of crowd did those events draw? There's a lot of stars. Yeah, it's very like a ton of Canelo fans. So the whole stadium is just a bunch of Mexicans rooting for Canelo. And then there's some Kazaki.

Yeah. Joe Rogan and Chappelle were there. Steph Curry. Steph Curry. Triple H. Matt Test. Triple H. Nate Diaz. Liver King. Liver King. were there um steph curry curry test triple h liver king liver king liver king star-studded affair

vince was there yeah ben vince legend canelo is vincey back canelo was there is he back yeah oh yeah back to the king i mean i saw the south thing up there Well, he's certainly not That guy's doing my bit Eating bananas Look at him eat a banana Oh

Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh

Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh

Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh

Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh

Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh

Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh It's a woman Yeah. It's a girl. It's a woman.

It's a woman. It's a woman. It's a woman. It's a woman. It's a woman. It's a woman. It's a woman. It's a woman.

It's a woman. It's a woman's body. What is he saying, though? Eating a banana. Probably something really funny. He's a tight writer, so he's probably writing, dude. Should we get him in here? We couldn't possibly.

We already burned that bridge. Oh, no, no, no. We don't have that. We don't have that. We don't have that club in our bag. We've done it before. We don't have that club in our bag. Right.

And it's never gone well. No, last one went well. Who was the last one? Stav. Stav and Tom Segura both went well. Schultz went well. Schultz went well. I don't think I was here for any of the three.

We're about to miss our chance. I get pissed off when they see me. Mark Norman. What's up, brother? Oh, hey, what's up? Coffee man. Oh, nice. That was good.

EJ labeled coffee man. Coffee. Oh, he's going in. Is he going into Glennie's Only Stands? Oh, that's out and about. Oh, he's eating a banana for the boys. Oh, yeah. What the fuck? They actually make Oh, he's eating a banana for the boys. Oh, yeah. What the fuck?

They actually make every guest come in with a banana. How much can you fit? Type of thing. That type of thing. Yeah, that type of thing. He's sucking off bananas and stuff. I wore these shorts in a hot tub two weekends ago. And I think they still smell like hot tub.

Oh, no. I'm kind of self-conscious of whether it smells like hot tub, which is not a bad smell, but it's just chlorine rich. Someone's got to smell you. Brandon, could you? I mean, Jerry wore his shitty pants. Yeah, I'm getting some smells from my chair. I wasn't going to bring it up. Oh, are you?

Whoever was sitting here before was... Yeah, that's hot tub all day. Have you washed them? That smells like you got out of the hot tub five minutes ago. No, I haven't washed them. Make somebody else smell them. I can't be the only one to smell them. Ah, you got it. You know what it's like. Are you smelling red shorts?

Weirdo. Such a bitch. Yeah, why are you smelling shorts? Maybe you should go on out and about instead of Marky Mark that's the dream yeah love going out and about

yeah remember when Blake Griffin like made it look like the trainer was like like the trainer was like helping him

and he like yeah he held his hand oh yeah that's what I wanted Randy that's two bad shots you kissed a dude last week. Yeah, you did kiss me.

So you're not up next. Why did you put your hand back there? Stability. I was doing you a favor. Oh, okay. Yeah, it was a nice favor. Good looking out, brother. Does this look like what I think it looks like?

That's hot. You're going to have to explain that to your children one day. Tommy's watching. It doesn't matter. Does he watch? No. Okay. He's got his own show.

Tommy's in the comments. Tommy's in the chat. What's up, guys? It's Tommy from Barstool. Well, he gave me his top five. He's talking to Shoe Nice the whole day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He gave me his top five Barstool employees, and three of y'all made it.

Who? Really? This is not a good thing. No, you have to tell it. You can't say it. I don't think anyone's goingall made it. Who? This is not a good thing. Because the two people. No, you have to tell it. You can't say it. I don't think anyone's going to get it. His top five is Roan, Big Cat, Nick, Spider, and Emrex.

Okay, that makes sense. It's fair. Yeah, I'm not upset about that. Me and Tommy played tag for like three hours before the case race. Oh, you didn't? We did. Did you? He was chasing you. Tommy tagged Sass and Sass walked off.

Permanently it. No, I slapped you. That wasn't tagged. Smoked his ass. He was hunting you. He was hunting me. It actually became like a workout. He's got a lot of stamina.

He does. Boy, he can go. He can go. He goes and goes. And then he sleeps and sleeps. For days. We need to have another TW day. Yeah, we do have to have a TW day. How did in October last year?

How do we up the ante? We're going to get him a gun. He's got a gun. And I kind of want to get a trapeze artist in here. How are we going to pull that off? You know how on the Venice Beach boardwalk that a guy will have a big ring and he'll just be like, oh yeah, ring guy.

Yeah. What if we just got a ring guy in the middle doing ring tricks and shit like that? I'd like that. Have you guys ever seen this? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Ring guys rule. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's a good ad. I only got one of them when we were at the Canelo Way and it sucked. They didn't do it again. That's a Mexican song. Fucking rules, mariachi band. Mariachi bands are always good vibes. There's never been a bad vibes mariachi band. If we had someone doing this in the lobby. That's some serious core strength. Yo.

God damn. If it was a topless busty doing it. We need to get a big ring. We need a big ring. Yo. This guy's going too crazy. We need a big ring you need a big ring this guy's going too crazy one of us doing that we need a big ring so bad if sasko you buy one i'll buy one right now you just what did you search big ring that's probably like five thousand if sasko's in is just a natural he's just so fucking good i'm searching big ring on Amazon. Big giant ring.

Maybe big giant, yeah. I would just fall. I'd grow all dull. Collapse head first instantly. You've got to be so strong. Big giant ring for tricks. Nope. What are those called? The wheel of fortune?

Seer? Or is the guy's name Seer? I don't know. Is that a form of transportation? Woulder? Or is the guy's name Seer? I don't know. Is that a form of transportation? Definitely. Out of the way. HLV laying like three of you in there. Oh, that might be it.

Seer wheel. Seer wheel? Yeah. That should be one of the punishments. Okay, wait. I think I found it. I think I'd die. I would die.

My arms would pop off like a G.I. Joe. Not that expensive. Is this right? $400? 33-inch? That's not long enough, right? 33 inches. $400 for that is pretty pricey.

37 inches, that's not long enough. That's not big enough, is it? I don't think so. Or maybe for Tommy. It's got to be like 60 inches. I want ours pre-built, so I don't want to get a fucking... No, I don't want to put it together. It's got to be metal, too.

Speaking of circular things, we have a really bad wheel. So everyone knows. Oh, we have an awful fucking wheel. Awful wheel. Awful wheel. Can we put on all the cuisines for tomorrow and spin for cuisine? Oh, we have an awful fucking week. Awful wheel. Awful wheel. Can we put on all the cuisines for tomorrow and spin for cuisine? Oh, yeah. You got to sign to country.

We have to do that country. So we're going to gorge tomorrow before our fast, 24-hour fast. DJ, maybe you could just find a random country generator, refresh, and give it to us. You definitely could find that. Oh, I like that. I love Shady Rays. Don't you guys? Oh, buddy. Love Shady Rays, don't you guys? Yeah!

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for our listeners very best deal of the season shadyrays.com and use code yak 50 off two pairs of polarized sunglasses shady rays hell yes i'm feeling a wheel reset. I'll be beautiful. We need it so bad. I'm feeling it. Wait, what do we got? Did we spin yet? Oh. What I don't understand is when we get wet, does wet not...

If we get wet... It's just one person. But it doesn't go away after we get it? No, and it's just one person. Only dries go away. It's only one person. We don't do the whole... We got wet at the up front.

Oh, Ron, good job at the up front. Oh, Rone. Good job at the up front. Great job. Very good. What was your point of view? How do you think other people did? You did really well. What about anyone else?

Who do you want to know about? What was your? Who do you want to know about? All grade people. What? All grade people. Who do you want to know about? Start from the top, I guess.

E? Anything interesting happen? Money? Money? Were you put in any tough situations? raid people who do you want to know about start from the top i guess e anything interesting happened money were you putting any tough situations um i mean they just kept adding people to the show and then they were in my ear being like all right we got to wrap this up faster it's like yeah that yeah that would be tough yeah i guess that's not really a funny story um i got everybody did pretty good i don't know it wasn't that like eventful or funny but it was

I had less nerves for that than any other any other type of performance it was just pretty straightforward and easy you think you would have been nervous I wouldn't have done it

yeah you could have done it I think you easily could have done it I think that I think that you've unlocked 4% of your brain,

and the other 96% is going to involve you speaking in front of corporate advertisers by the 400 load. Shit. It's coming. I think that's a realistic possibility for you within the next couple days. Well, you're the wizard. Yeah? Mm-hmm. The wizard. The wizard.

That's what I mean. You've got that wizardry in you. Wizardry of the penis. Should we spin it? Yeah. And we need to do the country generator. This is going to be bad. I can tell this is going to be bad. It's going to be shiny balls. So nails are permanently

on as well? No, that's a week. Yeah, that's permanently on, I think. We'll take it off when it drops. It's going to be funny once. No, it's not. Nails are funny forever. I think it's funny forever. We thought that about other things, too.

Yeah, but it always circles back. Double Ritz felt funny forever, and then it wasn't. Yeah, we did it a couple times, and we stopped. It never felt funny to me. I thought it was funny. I feel like nails will be funny. Everything you do will be a lot sassier. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Got to put a shot ski on there. Come on. Oh! People are going to be so mad. They're going to be so mad. So mad. Yes!

We needed that shit. So bad. I told you I was feeling a wheel reset. I know it's just going to rip our hearts out tomorrow. Oh, we have to do it now. We have to re-spin on a wheel reset. Oh, fuck me. A lot of dry.

God, that was good. Johnny bald. Oh, add KB's wild back. Perfect. I don't think you need to do 24-hour fast, even though we're going to do it. I don't think it needs to be on the wheel anymore. I know. It was a one-time thing.

It's a better looking wheel. Way better. Somehow steel still looks like those are going to hit too, though. Yeah. Nah, we're good. We're totally good. Wheel reset? People are going to be so mad.

Wheel's looking out for the boys. Needed it mad. Wheel's looking out for the boys. Needed it bad. Wheel's looking out for the boys. Let's go. Did you find a country generator, TJ? Yep. All right. So this will just be.

We're doing 10 countries? Yeah, 10 countries. You got to bring something in and we'll just eat. We'll gorge before the 24-hour fast. All right. Oh, boy. So let's start with Owen? Yeah, Owen,. You got to bring something in and we'll just eat. We'll gorge before the 24-hour fast. All right. Oh, boy. So, like, start with Owen? Yeah, Owen, you're up.

Did it. Bahama. Island. What are we thinking for this, jerk? Island boy. My mind's immediately going to a jambalaya served in a whole pineapple. Wow. We'll see.

Okay. Can you bring that for just you? Or do we do the fire fest sandwiches? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Idea. Should we start the fast before the show tomorrow and break it Wednesday? What are we doing?

We're doing both. What are we doing now? We're going to do a feast before, and then we're going to break it, too. But then breaking it would be after the show. No, breaking it is on Wednesday. We'll go until we break it. Okay, okay. Wednesday's show will be fast energy.

Which I think is good. Yeah, I think we'll be very sharp. All right. Good luck, Nick. A test on our bodies. Malta. Malta. Okay.

Malta Whoppers. Yeah.. Okay. Malta Whoppers. Yeah. Malta Whoppers. Yeah. Okay. You're right. They're from Malta. That's a good point.

So is Colt 45. Oh, yes. All right. I got it. There's four loco, I think. Hey, Brandon. Hot high noon. Real vodka.

Real juice. Real people. You and me. This is you. Uruguay. That's some good food. I think that's beef. Maybe bring in

two dishes, two servings of each country and everyone can have a little taste. Are we doing that or are we spinning a wheel and you get someone else's? Oh, we draft. Or we could draft. Yeah, we could draft. I want to make sure we're eating a lot.

Oh, that's actually better. Yeah, we'll draft. So your last meal before the fast might be... You don't want a bad meal before the draft. Let's do a draft. Oh, that would be great. Yeah, no, we'll do a draft. Yeah, we're doing a draft.

Yeah, we'll draft it. I'm getting authentic molten food. Yes. Drafting into a fast. We're drafting into a fast. Okay. I like it. Yeah. So no one fuck a fast. We're drafting into a fast. I like it. So, no one fuck with their foods.

Snake draft or not? Wink, wink. Just one round. Wink, wink. No winks. Wink. For those on the podcast, Dan is saying the word wink. Paraguay! Paraguay and Uruguay?

I don't like that. I don't like two guays Well that's how it came up though Yeah fair Generator is just It is just Where is Paraguay I don't know It's landlocked

Argentina and Brazil Paraguayan food You could probably get Argentinian And just say it's from Paraguay. Hey. Hello. It's not cool. Sopa.

That shit's not cool, bro. You're a gay. Horn cakes. Keep a guasa. Brandon. Fuck you. Let's generate. Oh!

Oh! Wow. Let's generate. Oh, that's a good roll. Nice, nice. Wow. All my Dominican girls, Dem. All right, there's no Paraguay on Seamless. So you want to just take Argentinian? I don't know. What do I do?

I would go to search molten food, and I'm going to find something. Search, yeah, Paraguayan food on Google. Chipa Guasa. Asado. It has to beayan food or Paraguayan food on Google. Chipa Guasa. Asado. It has to be something that a Paraguayan has ever eaten. I'm bringing in, yeah, yeah. Like, what do you mean? As long as one Paraguayan has eaten this.

Okay. That's fair. Let's spin again. Time. Tuvalu. Oh, shit. There's like 200 people in it. They're going to be underwater soon, and I think they only have one restaurant.

What is it? What do they serve? I don't know. Is it an island of like 10,000 people? Should it just be like a bucket of salt water? Shit, I'm wondering. They probably have similar diets as Hawaiians. Just look up the...

Like the country's dish, yeah. Look up that one restaurant that they have, see what they serve there, and then reverse engineer it. Captain D's. All right, Sass. Oh, I found a really good Paraguayan restaurant. Luxembourg. Oh, Luxembourg.

We've got some small-ass countries. Yeah. All right. All right. Luxembourg. It's the aristocrat, all right. Yeah, yeah. Do they do French fries with mayonnaise there? I believe so.

Ooh. I think they do. Delicious. All right. Bulacca. Bulacca. That looks all right. That's the best picture of it, though.

Yeah. Is that meat or is that, like, okra? What the? Swamp what? What is it? Tara. Oh, okay. Are you familiar?

All right. It's for you, TJ. For TJ. Swiss. Ah, cheese. One, one. Chocolate and cheese. I'm in peace. I found some sopa paraguay, which is just bread.

And I think we do a blind draft without knowing what. We draft the country, not the food. Yeah. I like that. Yeah, keep it in the bag. We keep it in the bag before? Yep. Yeah.

Uruguay looks awesome. So does Dominican food. You just eat meat. That's all they eat. They don't eat vegetables. Holy fuck. I got to get some of this Dominican food. I might go to Uruguay.

This is for Zah. This is for Zah. Come on, Zaw. Zaw. Fish your wish, Zaw. Give him the goddamn Zimbabwean food. Hypothetically, could you make it to Uruguay and back? You're on. Yes, let's go.

Oh, nice. You're on. For today's show, or before tomorrow's show? Could you make it to Uruguay and back? No, no way. No? How long of a flight is it? It's probably just not direct. today's show or before tomorrow's show? Could you make it to Uruguay and back? No way. How long of a flight is it? It's probably just not direct.

You probably have to go into Buenos Aires or fucking Medellin. Hey, look, there's the friend, man. There he is. All right, Francis. Cool t-shirt today. Yeah, and pants and shoes. Francis is sipping it out on his bed all weekend. How is he going to look? Oh, he's too good for the yak Damn we would have invited him on too

Fucking even Norman looked Norman fucking I fucked us with a banana Francis probably had Food from Iran yesterday Yeah it's actually one of the better dishes I stayed at the Four Seasons in Baghdad No he had in Baghdad.

No, you had to Baghdad for a rack. You had to Baghdad for a rack. Yeah, please. Oh, man. Damn. Wait, so who's last? Steven? Steven's last one.

What was TJ's? Swiss. Sri Lanka. Yes! Awesome flag. He just hit it a couple more times. Sri Lanka? Is that Burmese? I could do this for a while. Oh my god, we're having Burmese.

We are going to have Burmese food. Sri Lanka's Burmese. I ran again. Wow, Iran. Right? What the fuck? Chat's going crazy. That generator's got to get canceled. What the fuck? That shit was not sweet, dude.

Do I have Uruguay or Paraguay? You have Paraguay. I have Uruguay. Uruguayan. Do I have Uruguay or Paraguay? You have Paraguay. I have Uruguay. Uruguayan. And I have Luxembourg. What is Luxembourg? Uruguayan Brothers. Is that just a rich-ass country?

Very rich. They probably have crazy McDonald's. Should we just bring some cash? Yeah. We got to eat cash. Here we go. Why is this in the form of a DM? Probably DM'd it to us.

Smart. Smart. Damn. Really a shitty list of countries if you think about it, though. No. Frankly, Malta's very underrated. What is Malta? I don't know. Little Island.

Watch this if this is like Little League World Series. What about the World Cup? Would this be a good grouping? No. Switzerland. I think it would be better in the World Cup than it this be a good grouping? No. Switzerland. I think it would be better in the World Cup than it would be. Uruguay. Uruguay.

Very strong team. Portland. Fucking Suarez. There you go. There you go. I bet you the first four don't have any Olympic medals. Whoa. No, your Bahamas has sprints.

Oh, yeah. Never mind. Yeah. Jeez. Jeez. Fuck. I'd watch, yeah, I'd watch Dominican Republic beat Iran in Little League World Series like 35 to nothing. Actually, the first time I ever heard of Tuvalu was watching the Winter Olympics and the people

walk in. I saw Tuvalu with a contingent of like two people, so I immediately texted Kyle and said, what is Tuvalu? Oh, yeah. That's a great story. It was. It was. We have a history of Tuvalu, me and him. That's crazy we have a history of Tuvalu me and him

that's crazy a shared ancestry of Tuvalu it's beautiful god damn anything else that shit was sweet I sent you one video of a news thing

that might not even I haven't seen it in forever I have a guest coming so I gotta go welcome him Norman no where are no there's Chick-fil-a out there Brandon god damn it there is Chick-fil-a I have a guest coming, so I've got to go welcome him. Hello, Norman. No. No, there's Chick-fil-A out there, Brandon.

There is Chick-fil-A. I want to eat it before my guest gets here. Tonight is everyone's last chance to take part in it. You're showing a picture at 5.30 at the Ragtag Theater. Tell me about what's being shown. The show that's going on tonight is called One Small Step. It's a documentary about the first chimpanzees to be sent into space. It's sort of a combination of a history of the space program and animal rights sort of activist piece. How many of you guys got together to put together this film festival? There were two core individuals, myself and ryan wiley and uh both of us went to school at mu in columbia

and we're touring the country with our festival right now and one of the pictures that i know ryan was involved in was the joe amrine piece that got a lot of you know publicity i'm sorry uh i'm uh we going to take a commercial break. Is she mad at him? Yeah, what the hell? That wasn't as good as that. It was old school internet. No, that was funny.

No, he wasn't doing it. I thought he was doing a joke. No, he went out the night before. He spit up like a baby. Yeah. I don't like that reaction. That's a funny fake movie. Yeah, no.

Yeah, no, that sounded very serious. I thought that was a joke. That's what I thought. I thought it was like a joke. Yeah. This is Big Break. Just a puddle of milk. That's like a cat's throw up. Yeah, cat's throw ups are gross.

Actually, I have seen cat's throw up, and it doesn't even look like that. It's like chunkier. It looks like quinoa kind of. One person should bring cat's throw up. Oh, yeah. Luxembourg's throw up. Oh, yeah. Luxembourg. For Brandon.

You're wrong. We should get Brandon. We gotta fuck with Brandon. He's the only one who's mentally not strong enough to do a fast. Or to eat regular food. Well, if you don't eat tomorrow, then your fast is gonna be longer. Yeah. He's gonna have to eat it.

So what's the rules around this? We're bringing one dish now, because one person's having it? longer. Yeah. He's going to have to eat it. So what's the rules around this? We're bringing one dish now because one person's having it? Correct. Okay. One of you guys is going to be stuffing your face with Malta food.

I can't wait. Maltese. Comes Brandon. Maltese. And then a little white dog. He gets down like a falcon. Self in there. A little Maltese falcon for the boys.

Damn, I'd love a whole fish tomorrow. Oh, you're a fish guy. That's on anyone. You've always been a fish guy. You are a fish guy. You order fish at dinner. At Dover Soul. It was so good, KB.

I'm smack dab in the middle of my pork chop era. Oh. We were just talking about pork chops. We were at dinner. We were saying that someone ordered a pork chop and they apologized. Jack McCarthy. He ordered a pork chop, and they apologized. Jack McCarthy. He ordered a pork chop.

He's like, I'm sorry. He's like, why? I'm in the middle of it. Deep. What's this? Oh, that's Malta's food, yeah. Stevato Talfinic? Yeah.

What the fuck is that? Rabbit. And they're like, oh, a stew. A lot of stuff with peas. What's the circles on the right? It looks like pasta in a pastry. Yeah, it looks like a pan flute. It's macaroni.

Don't people have fears of clusters of circles? Yeah, trypophobia. It's not like a fear. I'm disgusted. You should grind your teeth. Isn't it the iPhone? Wasn't that like... That's why I can't eat Ethiopian food.

Wasn't that a big thing when the iPhone came out with the three cameras and everyone's like, this is really trippy, like this is not okay? But it's because of people's like ancestral fear of spiders, right? Is that true? Pretty sure like a spider's eye like has a cluster of circles like that.

Whoa. They have like weird ass eyes. They do have a weird ass eyes. DJ, you got a DM from your boy, our boy, Roald. Oh yeah,

he just followed me. He said he was going to be in LA so he can stop in. Who? It's a classic Brit thinking the US is smaller than it.

Just pop over. Who's this? A British bro? Roald Bradstock. Yeah, we'll get him in. Who is he? He's the world record holder for longest golf ball throw.

Oh, shit. Yeah, and he also paints. No way. Yeah, he rules. Yesterday I went to a painting exhibit in New York and they said the guy was the most prolific painter

in the history of paintings. He's painted the most paintings. It sounded like some bullshit, but then the stats that they were talking about were pretty fucking crazy. He does 60 paintings a day, and he has for 30 years. My God, yeah. Is he regarded as good? I don't know. I don't know.

Is he better or worse than Ringo Starr? I'll show you one of his paintings to see if Here's a sampling of a couple of his paintings You think he's good? Come and see him break some ridiculous world records Throw a I can't tell You're not in LA though

No we're not Where is that Oh damn That was it That was it. That was it. How did you guys hear about this dude? We asked Content Kim how far she thinks she could throw a golf

ball. And she said 10 feet. She ran a mile first. Which really confused me. In all facets. She's an enigma. Yeah, yeah. She's an enigma. She truly has the depths that...

Zoom in on Brandon. Look at him. Stuffing his dumb face. Sad fucking face. He's got a thought. He's like, oh, I'm going to talk about Star Wars. Oh, Sandlot. This is number five.

Remember the big green? Rudy isn't that good All in if you disagree Major League 3 is better than Major League 1 Tune in to Brandon Walker's show He can actually only count to five That's why he just loves it What else can I do?

I do all the numbers This bastard. Pisty didn't get a sandwich because he's not grossed out by surfaces. He'll just put the sandwich down on any table. Raw. Yeah. Even in the bathroom. We share a desk.

There's a grease ring in between us. I need to get him a coaster for sandwiches. Yeah, you do. That's freaking gross. What's going on in that brain? He's a slovenly bastard. Too much potatoes for Brandon. For someone who...

Oh. Irish, is he? Oh. Well, now they're going to think I left early just to go eat the chicken. You know what happens. You know this happens every time. You got to leave the yak early. Can you tell them to stop doing that?

I'm going to eat my little chitlins. I got a 45 piece of nuggets. Let me be in peace. Ghost Kyle. Oh! Woo! Woo! Woo! Woo! we be in peace ghost Kyle oh what is ghost Kyle doing out there

oh that's weird you and Brandon are just chilling huh take a nugget wait Kyle try to fuck his face oh yeah have we done this before

we might have not with face fucking I think we face fucked manipulated images go fuck his face. He doesn't know. He doesn't understand. He can't comprehend ghosts yet.

Sass, tickle him. Tickle him, Sass. Can you see me? Give him a little coochie what dude sass are you dead holy shit why can't they see me i'm all over here that's not even me oh roan is the one it's roan roan oh that is roan yeah whoa my it's crazy how my eyes are shifting now to see him clear oh no oh possess him possess nick oh go inside of him yeah yes Clear. Oh, no. Oh, fuck. Possess him. Possess Nick. Oh, go inside of him. Yeah.

Yes. Where'd he go? Where'd you go? Disappeared inside of him. See me? Keep chilling, Rick. Oh. I don't think it happened to me. Ron, what are they saying out there?

Someone go take a sip of his soda. Walk up and take a sip. Steven, go take a sip of his soda. He'll get real mad at Steven. Steven, go just grab a sip. Do it now. Do it now. He's distracted.

Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go. One sip. Hurry up. Oh, he thinks we're up to something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't look at him. Don't look at him. Slowly, slowly.

Don't look at him. Don't. Oh, Steven. Goddamn. Yeah, yeah, I know you're good at acting. What is he? What? Steven.

Steven. Steven. Oh, yeah. Wait, it's reaction. It looked like it was bad milk in there. Or like just whiskey. It's like we're watching like a silent movie right now. Like a silent comedy. What should we do? What else do we do?

All right, go just take his french fries. Just take them. Yeah, just take like a handful of them. Kyle, go fart. Do a loud fart. I can't right now. Why? He might poop himself. No, just take a handful of them. Kyle, go fart. Do a loud fart. I can't right now. Why? He might poop himself.

No, he just can't. My oatmeal is sitting out there. You got oatmeal today? Yeah, I got oatmeal today. Old. Weren't you eating it out of a cup, though? There we go. Look, he's going to get them.

He's going to get them. That was perfect. He cares so much about his food. He cares so much. What else can we do to him? Yeah, what else can we do? Someone beat the fuck out of him. You can't get a fart, Kyle. No, I can't.

Someone go the other way. We'll distract him. Kyle, go the other way. Go that way. And do what? We'll distract him. Come up from behind, behind the golf ball and just steal everything. Tie his shoe to the table.

Oh, he sees you. Now I'm going to go out the front as a distraction. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm going to come in the front door with... Wait, no, just stand right there. Stand right there for a second. Stand right there for a second, Ron. Because it's going to take a second.

It's like the scene from, yeah, yeah. We're going to get him. Yeah. Yeah. So nervous. Oh, my God. He's got a throat coat. What is Kyle going to do?

He's going to try to steal everything from behind. We're going to see Kyle just sneaking around the corner any second now. This is going to be really funny to me. Yeah. Oh, I'm going to laugh so hard. He wants to get up. He wants to. Where's Kyle?

Why did I just hear Kyle's voice? Where the fuck is Kyle? Kyle's on crutches. Kyle's on crutches. What? Where is Kyle? Why did I just hear Kyle's voice? Kyle's on crutches. Kyle's on crutches. What? Where is he? What's Kyle on crutches? He pivoted. I'll go around.

I'll go around. I'll go around. I'll go around. Oh, he sent somebody. Spider's going. Spider's going. Get it. No, no.

Keep throwing. Keep throwing. Spider's going. Oh, no, keep throwing. Keep throwing spiders going. Oh, spiders coming in right from the main... This is not good. I told him from the bike. That scared everybody? Oh, he's taking a sip. Permission to break the table?

That thing is on its last legs. Somebody jumps from the staircase. Oh, he's taking a sip. Permission to break the table? That thing is on his last legs. Somebody jumps from the staircase. How many people can we get to drink from that cup? I'll go drink from it. I'm going to go all the way around. You guys got to keep distracting him, though. All right, I got to go do an interview.

TJ, put a big twerking ass up on the screen in here. He won't be able to look away. A big, shiny ass. Valerie K. What's up, boys? Wow. Fellas. Look at this.

Wait, what happened? He's choking. Oh, no. Wait, what's he choking? How's he choking? This is it. I'm sad. That was sad. Took a turn.

Yeah. This is a... I'm sad. That was sad. That took a turn. No, he just choked IRL, I think. Yeah, he just choked. Oh, I think his boy's coming in. Wonder what show this could be for. MJF? Yeah. Yeah.

Well. Oh, here comes Big Cat. I don't think Big Cat knows the bandit. No, he doesn't. No, no, no. Let's keep it that way. I don't think there's anything to take anymore.

He's already finished the soda. The soda's finished. Oh, big cat's going. Big cat's going. Yes. Oh. Mm-hmm.

Grab it. Grab it. Grab it. Oh, my God. Oh, he's got a big... Oh, no! Wait, did the ball hit his head? Oh, I'll go get the rest of this shit while he gets that.

Oh, yeah. What's he going to do? Well, boys? Looks like we got him. Looks like we got it. I don't want it. I don't want it. I don't think there's anything in there.

I think he finished all the food. Okay, we're just bullying now. Now? Well, yeah. Yeah. I got to get my throat right for talking about mini golf. You're still doing that? That's exciting.

About nine, ten hours a day. All right, we're good, we're good. Oh, we got the food and the notebook? And his phone. Oh. I don't want this guy to talk shit on me. Yeah. He will.

He's going to call you a fat, lazy bastard. Let's get it. I have his notes, so I'm going to ask him all the questions that Brandon's going to ask him. Let's get him in here. Let's get MJF in here. MJF. MJF, come on in, brother. Throw on the fake.

The Burberry? MJF, come on in, brother. Come on in, brother. The one time. Come on in. Here, Brandon. Here, you take us back. What's up, MJF? We're in, brother. Come on in, brother. For one time. Here, Brandon. Here, you take us back. What's up, MJF? Yeah, we're live.

No delay. That's Brandon. That's Brandon's shit. Sit on down there. Yeah. Oh, yes. Hey. MJF is here.

Yeah, I am. Just talking shop, brother. You know how it is. Talking shop a little bit? Oh, MJF, are you getting married? Brother, yeah. Nice. You got engaged. Nice. He shop a little bit? Oh, MJF, are you getting married? Brother, yeah. Nice. You got engaged.

Nice. He's got fat tits, red hair. Nice, nice. Tits, red hair. Gigantic ass. Her name's Naomi Rosenblum. Look her up on Instagram. Follow her.

Oh, hell yes. You can stare at her. You're never going to get to touch her, but you can look at her, you know? Unreal. How's your relationship with Tony Khan? What's going on? It's solid. Me and Tony are good because he pays me good money, man. That was a preview of Brandon's interview. There you go. I'm sure it's going to be his only time. I'm sure it's going to? It's solid. Me and Tony are good because he pays me good money, man.

That was a preview of Brandon's interview. There you go. I'm sure it's going to be fucking great. Lost over the big tits. Yeah, the big tits. I'm shocked he's literate and was able to write anything for him. Yeah, it was just hieroglyphic. Where are you from again?

Was it Bumblefuck? Mississippi. Mississippi. So are we talking sports in here, boys? We're just fucking with Brandon really shooting the shit you like that

what um are you back dude I'm back I'm back catch me every single Wednesday did you get hurt no I did not get hurt why were you out

so what had occurred was my I'm one of the biggest draws in the business right now facts minute for minute the facts are out there if you want to look it up

yup and I told my boss hey I need a grotesque amount of money. And he was like, nah. And I was like, fucking deuces. Okay.

I left. The show went downhill without your boy. He begged daddy to come back. Wow. Now I make that grotesque amount of money. Wow. And I didn't have to sign a contract extension. Hell yes.

Not bad, right? So wait, he could then fire you at any moment if you don't have a contract. No, no, no. I'm under contract Oh okay alright Just bump my No extension Nice

No extension So what are we talking Mid five figures What are we talking Baby No more Seven Six

Six figs Seven figs Eight figs One of the biggest draws in wrestling right now That's a fact That's a fact You got anything else for me Or should I leave

I mean I think I also saw... What else is on that list? Should I plug the show, too? Yeah, plug the show. I'm from AEW Dynamite. Just in case you're deaf, dumb, blind, stupid, or let's just assume poor, my name is Maxwell Jacob Friedman. I am the youngest and fastest rising star in the history of professional

wrestling. You can catch me every single week, Wednesday night, on TBS from 8 to 10 o'clock, or you can catch me every single week wednesday night on tbs from 8 to 10 o'clock or you can catch us on rampage every single friday on tnt and i never will be uh every single friday on tnt from uh 10 to 11 wow yeah mjf the most electric man in sports biz there you go baby hey now you're back with wrestling yeah well. That's not the exciting part. Yeah, there's gonna be a Rasslin thing. I'm on it. The highest watched video you ever

had, correct? No. First. I looked at the videos. Who's in front of me? The three highest. Oh. I'm all three or me. Wow. That makes sense because I'm a three-time Dynamite Diamond Ring champion. Three, three, it's all there. Alright, I'm gonna let you guys keep talking about this shit.

MJF, you're the man. Big Cat, if you ever have an opportunity, I'd love to sit down and chat with you. Yes, you got to come on PMT. I would love to do that. Yes, absolutely. Sir, it's been an absolute pleasure. All right, thank you, MJF. The band.

Yeah, make sure. Give them a hard time. Make sure you give them a hard time. I don't give them easy time. Yeah, yeah, don't give them an easy time. All right. All right, MJF. Yeah, yeah. Don't give him an easy time. Get out of the fucking room. All right. All right, CJ. MJ.

That was awesome. Being a wrestler must be fun as fuck. That was just some old school pranking of Brandon. Is that the kind of wrestling you did? No. The USA team killed it in Serbia. Fuck yeah. On everything?

That would be kind of exhausting to uphold. Yeah. He probably has a different energy level though. You know how some people just have words spilling out of their mouth? Yeah. Cocaine. But what if he does get really anxious or sad? Or exhausted.

Yeah, like who's he going to talk to? It's going to be tough. People don't think about that. Talks to Brandon about it probably. Have to check out that interview. Where's fiance? Where's fiance? With the, yeah.

With the big tits. Is he actually shouting her out? I'm E. Rosenblum. I'll be. Oh, yeah. He did tell us we could look at her tits. Whoa. Is he licking the blood off that guy?

He's licking the blood? And I'll be... There's Django. And I'll be the greatest man of your life. I'm starving. I am too. All right. Let's get salads today.

Yeah. All right. See everyone tomorrow. Yak is back. He's falling. Angry old Yak. It's the act. It's your drive. Yeah, we're starting to take it for a while. It's the act. It's the act.

It's the act. Yeah, it's time. It's time to do Yankees. It's the act. It's the Aguas.