The Yak - The Inaugural Yak Fantasy Draft Gets HEATED | The Yak 9-5-23

Episode Date: September 5, 2023

Vontae Mack...No matter whatYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, DJ, pull that up. Okay. Look at us. Oh, that's a long fade, DJ. Wow, it's still going. Hey, we're back. Yak is back.

Sponsored by Roback. Roback.com. R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com. Use promo code Yak. 20% off your... I'm doing an average. I understand. 20% off your first purchase. Roback.com.

Promo code yak. Why am I hearing my own voice? Roback.com. Promo code yak. 20% off your first purchase. We're back. We're in purgatory. It feels good to see everyone.

I missed each and every one of you, except Brandon, who is back from his four-month vacation. Congrats. I have been here. I have been here often. Congrats. This is a better setup than the studio, I believe. Yeah, much better. Yeah.

Yeah, this reminds me of the old studio. This isn't season 11, though, right? No, it's Purgatory. Purgatory. We're in Purgatory land. So, yeah, this is the cursed Purgatory season. How long are we in Purgatory? Who knows?

All business, Pete. Everyone tweeted him. Tell him to go fuck himself. This is the cursed purgatory season. How long are we in purgatory? Who knows? All business Pete. Everyone tweeted him, tell him to go fuck himself. It feels like he doesn't have a good handle on things. Feels like things are slipping away. That's pretty surprising. Yeah, I never thought that would happen. I never thought that would happen.

But yeah, it's good to be back. Hello, everyone. What are you doing, Brandon? Brandon's on Reddit and Pornhub. Reddit and Pornhub? I saw Reddit and Pornhub Reddit and Pornhub? I saw Reddit and Pornhub on his phone yeah he did Brandon hit the back button 10 times no no no

let's see what's on there I'm gonna see a big old dick what am I doing? yeah retweeting the yak yeah that's what you're doing Sass I'm happy to see you happy to see you as well. Yeah, we saw each other Like a week ago. Yeah, but that's still it's been I I'll say this the week off of the yak

I appreciate yak fans because they people kept on treating me being like this is killing me. Where the hell is it? That made me feel good. Yeah, because I was like dying inside every single day being like I wish I could yak Yeah, I missed it. Yeah, brandon's still on pornhub he's still on pornhub seeing pornhub still on pornhub do you are you actually turns his phone to me i see pornhub it's like he's doing it on purpose it's just that much porn all right what what's your favorite porn you're a big milkers guy i do like the titties. Did you see Sam Pittman's tits? I did.

They were mental. They were incredible. You don't know who Sam Pittman is. They were immense. I don't know if TJ can pull it up, but he's got the largest tits. Yeah, I saw that. Oh, I saw that. Yeah, they were massive.

Massive. Like, ass-raising tits? Yeah. Look at them. Whoa, dude. I actually got a little bit horny for it. Oh, my God. No, because they're not only big, they're suckable.

Yeah, they're titty-fuckable. Yeah. Something about a golf polo, really accentuated. Yeah. And the men that wear golf polos typically are big guys. Or stacked. I'm, like, worried about him. I think that's...

No, that's like a... That looks like a medical condition. He needs to get a manicure or something. Yeah. Where they're like... The comments had to have been oh they were something yeah they were quick said Sam Pittman's tits got me barking I was like yep but look at a smile on his face but the funniest ones were there were non sports fans that just found this picture and they were roasting it's a bad angle though do we

have other pictures no he's got to yeah I think I don't think that's that's from the direct front that's what makes the titties the most yeah i'll say this is a common thing for him every time he posts a picture he's like well you know i gotta prepare myself for the as a man with breasts you can't do you can't be in the middle of the of the like terrible holding thing there's nothing worse and i don't know why we've decided that as men to be like when we take a picture like a golf outing or something, we all got to put our arms around each other. It's one of the weirdest feelings.

It stretches your shirt out. It lifts the titties. I don't think Spanx could even help him. Is there a video of him though? Does he have recoil? I would kill to see a side angle. I'd kill to see how i want to see i would kill to see a side angle yeah i'd like i'd kill this i'd kill to see him wash a car on his tiptoes i just want to see him get

on his tiptoes and then drop his heels and just get him on a pole that picture you get a shirt tucked in right yeah that's the other mistake yeah no you can't you got to let it flow but i mean with titties like that you have to imagine the talk is probably like one millimeter of shirt that's tough. There's not a lot of fabric left to talk. Yeah, he's tugging at all times. They say if you can hold a pencil under the crease, that's how you know you've really got some milkers.

Brandon, can you hold a pencil? I doubt it. I don't know if I can hold a pencil. I mean, Pittman could hold- He could hold one of those fabric pens. Yeah, he could hold a vis? I doubt it. I don't know if I can hold a pencil. I mean, Pittman could hold many pens. He could hold one of those fabric pens. Yeah. He could hold a vis-a-vis dry erase. I remember I told this story.

I can't remember when I told this story, but when I was maybe like nine years old at a swimming pool, one of my friends was like, hey, see if you can hold your arms together like this. And I did it. And he's like, look, you have tits. And that basically was like the end of my life like that i think about it all the time it's just the the thought that like someone's always staring at my breasts and sam pitman's like five times that you were never unironically a shirt and pool guy though right no no no no brandon wish i had a i had a run uh-huh uh between like 32 and 36 where i was shirt in the ocean, shirt in the pool.

Did you have a shirt sex? That's the low point if you're a shirt sex guy. You weren't fat then. I don't think that's the low point at all. What do you mean that's low? That's just convenient. I've done that for my whole life. I lost my virginity with the shirt on.

Wait, Sass, are you wearing your shirt when you had sex? I don't think I've ever taken it off. No. I never take my shirt off. To Sass's point, if you're having sex, that's still like, you can't be, you're not that much of a loser. You're not having sex. Look at this loser fucking a dime in a shirt. I wouldn't enjoy sex if I had to take my shirt off.

That's all I would be thinking about the whole time. Not for me. Yeah, would you not be able to get hard if you saw yourself? No, I wouldn't thinking about the whole time. Not for me. Yeah, would you not be able to get hard if you saw yourself? No, I wouldn't. I literally wouldn't. Speaking of big titties, I went to Brandon's house on – I thought that was a good segue. Yeah, that was a great segue. Go with it. And I felt like it was something I wanted to bring up to the group.

You met his wife. I got invited to the Walker household wanted to bring up to the group. You met his wife. I got invited to the Walker household on Sunday for a steak cookout. And I will say, Brandon makes a good steak. That's what you want me to say, Brandon. You want me to say I have an audience. Yes. But it was an interesting experience, to say the least. I got the whole Tommy.

You're getting in trouble. Yeah. He, like, just grounded you. Tommy just, like, popping in during dinner and then Brandon telling him to go away when, like, there was literally nothing I wanted more than for Tommy to stay. Tommy asked me at one point, do you remember 9-11? He told a story. He just goes, do you remember 9-11? And I was like, I just kept looking at Brandon like, how do I handle this? He asked me what my favorite urban legends were um what'd you say

um i told him i believe in aliens and he kind of you could tell the look on his face was like that's like basic bitch you should yeah you should have said george bush did 9-11 yeah tie it all together for him everything connects in tommy's brain and then at one point he said um that he believes that Disney lost the magic when the millennials took over. I remember that. And then he didn't explain what he meant by that. I like Tommy being such an old soul.

He's judging millennials. What even is Tommy? Is he a – He's on the tail end of millennial or he's gen alpha. No, he's not on the tail end. Z, Z, Z. I'm an elder. He's on the tail end of Generation Z and the beginning of Generation Alpha.

It changes like 2011, 2010. There's a Generation Alpha? The kids now are Generation Alpha. I didn't know that. That makes a lot of sense. It goes Gen X, millennials, Gen Z, Alpha. Wait, so, Brandon, how long was your – wait, what is this? Gen –

Okay, well, then he's – He's not Alpha. So he's the end of – My kids are Gen Alpha. He wants to be Alpha. He's not Alpha. My kids are Gen Alpha. He's the end of Z then. He wanted to be Alpha though. So I got three Z's and an Alpha. That's pretty sick. How long was your commute today?

Hour and 15 minutes. Oh, that's not that bad. Titus, you drove out there. It wasn't too bad. It was an hour, but there's not a ton of traffic. You're out there though. It's good that the weather doesn't get bad here either. So it'll always be clear roads.

It dawned on me as I pulled into Brandon's town that Brandon's just the type of dude that wants to live in a town where when you pull in, it has all the state championships listed. Yes. And the town he lives in, I won't talk to you, Brandon, but there was's like one state championship they won in the 90s and it's there on the sign and i said you know i'll make fun of you for living so far away but also like this feels right for you and then and then like one guy who got invited to a camp never made the team never made practice squad but was he there's a picture of him in like a saint's jersey one guy who killed people at the black lives matter rally oh that's your town no oh just no sure maybe uh by the way kyle is is moved he's not here today but i think he'll be back that's free he'll be back later on this week yeah i believe so i miss him a lot i also uh i saw nick at the cubs game yesterday and i did not know

wrigley had seats that bad they're very bad and uh nick was wearing jeans and it was 95 degrees out yeah well i was with rudy and mook and those are the two thickest creamiest thighs in the office and i couldn't be shorted up next to those guys. That's true. Yeah, Mook has some tree trunk. My word. He's built. He's built. Well, Mook has girl legs. How'd you end up in those seats?

Last minute tickets. I didn't use game time is how I ended up in those seats. Oh, great plug. There we go. The ad machine. Yeah, so not bad. That's all the way zoomed in. And Big K, you just went up to find them.

I was at the game with my son, and after three innings, he was like, I want to go home. And I was like, why don't we go to the top? And that took another, like, two innings. So it was perfect for you, though, because I'd imagine you'd kind of be bombarded at a Cubs game. But there's no way they would believe it's you all the way up there. Yeah, people were just screaming like, oh, shit, you really did lay all those people down. Barstool is down $12 million. Barstool down bad.

So bad. What else did everyone do on their week off? The move went well for you, Nick? For sure, yeah. You're the only one who moved. Oh, no, Steven, too. Yeah. Steven, do we ever get a conclusion to the most boring Twitter thread of all time?

The worst Twitter thread of all time. That was the worst. I used it like ASMR, dude. I opened it up, and I was out in a second. Can we pull that up, TJ? It was so boring, I forgot to check back. It's okay. Because I was like-

No, nothing hooked you. Nothing hooked you about that. The road trip was you went from New York to Cleveland, and then Cleveland to Chicago. Yeah. And that was it. And he got chocolate pret went from new york to cleveland and then cleveland to chicago yeah and that was it and he got that was chocolate i got pretzels got some you had to get a treat that was the highlight that's the only memorable picture in front of a gas that was the biggest twist yeah and that was the flavor of your ice cream yeah he pumped his own gas that was huge is that does that suck having to do new jersey and not being able to pump

your gas? I much prefer pumping my own gas to the drive. Why? I like not getting out of the car. Because I don't like – the worst thing – I don't like talking to people. I hate waiting in a line. There's sometimes lines there where I hate waiting.

I just want to get out and pump it myself. No, not this. No, God. All right, so where did we – I got a compliment from the movers on my trunk packing. A lot of people were roasting it. They do that to everyone. How cute is that?

Did a stripper say that she thinks that you're cool? That's definitely their debt. I mean, you're, it's someone who's getting a tip, Steven. This was after I tipped them. It was after you tipped them. Okay. That means you brought in. But you, you, you, you tipped them before they, they looked at your stuff?

They didn't take, they didn't take my car, the stuff in my car. Okay. Wait. All right. Wait. Go back up. So, been a long day at a Whole Foods somewhere in Indiana eating sushi outside in 91 degree weather.

We need Rico to read these in his angry voice. Did you order the sushi or were the employees just racist and gave it to you? We haven't seen someone like this. Look. Sound an alarm. There's one. Finally. Finally. We can get someone like this. Look. Sound an alarm. There's one. Finally. Finally, we can get rid of this.

All right, then. Was going to hit the zoo in South Bend, but 91 degrees and human called for an audible dro... I also like, like, you don't really reference your kid's year, so it just looks like a grown ass man being like, oh, it was too hot for the zoo for me. Yeah. I mean, I made the call. Yeah. Oh, no, I know. I got that. The zoo is weirdly hot. year so it just looks like a grown-ass man being like oh it was too hot for the zoo for me yeah i mean i made the call yeah oh no i know i got the zoo is hot on a hot day i don't know why there's nothing hotter than a zoo yeah and the smell of shit oh it lingers around drove straight

to the northwest burbs chicago and hit a pool the kids loved it grabbed some hot dogs from patillo's got a beef and the chicago dog and headed to our hotel moving in in the am wow so what's like the the takeaways you just kind of drove from south bend to chicago yeah yeah it was basically there's boxes to prove he moved yeah movers are done trying to swim out of see if cardboard boxes the previous tenants had xfinity so comcast oh my god yeah God. Yeah, this is. This actually is getting good. It's so bad, it's getting good.

That tweet specifically might be one of the most useless. They asked me to set up my cable internet. I don't know how to do that. I think it takes like 30 seconds. No. They're looking for a white light. This is what they mean that it's very lazy. How's that lazy? You actually are. Hello hello you're doing what's that that's not lazy wait what are the interactions

all right no retweets 13 like you were you were actually doing a bit like how many what's the lowest interactions i can get on it's incredible hard to get yeah that's a crazy shit dude i got some interactions on the next one absolutely brilliant move by the pizza place cutting the pie like this that's how they cut it uh that like that wasn't like i've had special for you do it for you i probably i probably had four plus regular slices but don't feel guilty that's a fact um update i still have no internet sending a text sunday morning some hurdles, but glad we moved in. Have met several neighbors already.

Midwesterners really are friendly. I'll close this thread on my clothes. Shout out to the shorts and boxers. Wore them the entire time. Tuesday to Sunday, rock steady, never wavered. What? Why? Why did you not change?

You stopped at a hotel. You didn't make yourself a bag for the hotel? I made myself a bag, So I slept in different clothes. But traveling? No, I just went with those. You put on the same boxers? Yep. You changed out of them when you got to the hotel and changed back into them the next day?

Yep. Yeah. Okay. Shirts were different, but pants? That doesn't make sense. Those are my ace. If you're throwing a perfect game, you don't take them out. You were throwing a perfect game.

You didn't go to the zoo. Shorts and boxers. You didn't go to the zoo. Shorts and boxers were dry. No. There's no way they were dry. There's no way they were. They were.

I was in the car most of the day. You were outside in the hot dog. That's the most. I bet you got up and there was a clear outline. In the car with low air conditioning? Yeah. That truly was the worst Twitter thread of all time. That's okay.

Better be known for something, right? Yeah, no damage. No damage. I'm going to forget about this in 15 seconds. I't know that router one i don't know what you're talking about the old tenants had xfinity we have spectrum this is a fucking disaster so you got to know about this is that we mean? Oh, that's cool. We're going through some things. That rocks. Oh, that's you trying to... Yeah, who did try that?

We gotta sell these shirts. Oh, speaking of which, the case race, we hit the merch bonus. Let's spin the wheel to see who gets the merch bonus. I think it's $1,200. Oh, yeah. Damn. So someone will get the merch bonus. I figured that's the best way to do it.

All right. Yeah. So thank you to everyone who bought a shirt. That was awesome. We appreciate it. It helps us go mega, which I don't think mega is even a thing anymore. Yeah. There's no way.

It's all gone? Yeah. I think the GMs are gone. The mega's gone. That was a short tenure for mega. It was a fun little two-month thing where we're like, oh, this is going to be great. But we could still go mega. We could still go mega.

Mega could be our thing now. We could go Mega. We could still go Mega. But, yeah, I don't think any of that exists. We could set what Mega is. Right. Yeah, maybe everyone's Mega. A show that's a show on some couches.

Yeah. Mega. Is it possible to add the merch bonus onto the fantasy winnings? No. Let's do the merch bonus right now. Yeah. I want someone to get money right now. Okay. the fantasy winnings no let's do the merch bonus right now yeah i want someone to get money right now okay uh it will be everyone who participated in the case race take me out uh off to you because i just need no cake can be on it go ahead and put me on and if rico wins it i'll tie this on

rico and kb should be on it um yeah and oh man, if Rico wins this. Yeah, Rico, unfortunately. By the way, that. Put me on for Rico. We haven't been on since the case race. I feel like Rico took more damage than you did. Because Rico did more stuff than I did. Yeah. About five minutes in, I said, I stopped.

And he didn't. That was the most agonizing thing I've ever watched, by the way. What? You two morons yelling. Glad you enjoyed it. You two morons yelling about something that I should technically have a say in, but I know that whatever you guys decide. Well, you let me go out on the battlefield.

I didn't let anything happen, Frank. You just did. I went out on the battlefield. I came back covered in arrows and stuff, and you're like, why'd you do that? You put Leroy Jenkins on me and just fucking YOLO your way into a fight with Rico. And I'm just sitting at home watching the case race. And you guys have face paint on and you're drunk and you're screaming at each other.

And I'm like, all right, well, I guess they're going to solve it. You want to say it right now? What? Please go subscribe to Mostly Sports on YouTube. Yeah, Brandon Walker's 15th show. Okay, well, he's on it too. Right, I know. My first show with Mark Titus.

Yeah. TJ, just drop the YouTube link in the chat. You should make a shirt with your graveyard of shows yes you came across uh we probably don't have enough fabric this is a like the uh like the cleveland browns the mannequins by the brown stadium and all the quarterbacks runs out it's actually a crush yeah i think i got really drunk at the end. You did. It also was, I always am shocked. We were texting when it was live. It went for like five hours. I couldn't believe it.

It's always insane when it's 5 p.m. and they're like, we still got an hour left. What could we possibly be doing right now on this case race? Yeah, I'll go to look at the comments hours later and it's still live yeah yeah so thank you everyone who watched thank you everyone who bought the shirt uh we did get a merch bonus it helps us a lot we don't know mega anymore but still supporting the show is good that's the best part i had to tell to brandon because he's you know mostly sports is now his new baby yeah and he's in a constant pursuit for uh he won't he's like i want a big show i want a big show i was like the yak has become a pretty big show it's profitable yeah

and he just doesn't he doesn't even count it he's the second seed on it yeah my sidekick but yeah like i don't so yeah even when this one hits you're still gonna have to figure out like what is your show? That's a great point. Yeah, this would be my second successful show. Like, you could swap Brandon out of most of the sports. Yeah, absolutely. Are you afraid of, like, attaching yourself to him? I am because I know what I'm up against,

but I take this as, like, the ultimate challenge, and I feel like if I can make a successful show with Brandon, then I will take my all of it. You know, one of the people that fail with me is sitting right there. Yeah, Kate's right there. Well, but that wasn't Kate's fault. That was your fault. Yeah, it wasn't me.

I think mostly sports should be more like a rotating cast. Yeah, you and a guest. Maybe I'll come on. Maybe Nick will come on. Oh, I'd love to. KB. Yeah, that would be good. We could all come on at the same time.

We will have you guys on whenever you'd like. No, I'm talking to Titus. Yeah, I'll have you guys on whenever you'd like. Well, no, I'm talking to Titus. Yeah, I'll have you guys on whenever you'd like. Thank you. I appreciate that. And I think just like a really cool one-on-one dynamic. Yeah. Where you guys can just open up.

It's just like a forum for you guys. You know, it's my own fault. The fact that I didn't see this coming is embarrassing. Oh, it's insane. How did you not see this coming? I never see it coming. You're poison for shows. You are the splinal tap drummer. Like every time. But I never see it coming. You're poison for shows. You are the spinal tap drummer.

Like every time. But I just keep coming back. You're worse for pilots than Mo Atta. So Brandon, when do you think I am going to get the first text from Brandon where he's like, fuck, I don't think this is as big as I want it to be yet? That's not going to happen with this one. Okay, I agree. You say that every time.

We almost got the time slot we wanted. I'm sick of going to your weddings. What's the time slot? Seventh one. 10 Eastern, 9 Central. 9 Central. Yeah. I don't really need it.

I mean, I already got my own show, and it's doing great, so I don't really need it. This is a fun little hobby. This is a hobby, yeah. I'm not too worried about the numbers. I know they'll be great. But if they're not, Brandon, I'm curious. Like, when are you going to hit the panic button? Oh, the panic button was about six months ago.

Brandon, you're on the yak that is almost a mega brand. Oh, okay. We actually, that's the best part. Now that the mega stuff is gone, we can say we're about to be mega. Are we always about to be Mega? We were on the cusp. We were knocking on the door. I think they stopped doing the Mega and the GM stuff because they're like, what do we do if Yak becomes Mega?

You're the Lynn Bias of Mega, Brandon. Yeah, exactly. We're just a great what if. All-time what if. Mostly sports is going to be successful. I know. I'm excited about it. At what point do you think Brandon's going to miss a show because of traffic?

I'm not. So soon. I mean, what time do you have to leave? September 13th? I'm going to have to leave the house about 6, 630. That sucks, Brandon. No, that's fine. It's going to be live.

That way nobody in New York has to be at work before 11. Oh, here we go. Now we're going back to the case race. Oh, no, no, no. And you wake up at like 9 11. Oh, here we go. Now we're going back to the case race. Oh, no, no, no. And you used to wake up at like 9 o'clock, right? No. And you're going to be leaving at 6.30. No, no.

You're up all night. Yeah, I'm, I can, I, when have I ever not been here for something that I needed to be here for? The last four months of the act. We had a meeting. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I forgot about those 90 days. Oh, yeah. Didn't we literally have a company meeting?

Yeah, I forgot about those 90 days. Didn't we literally have a company meeting? You walked directly into that one. Your sideshow Bob walking into rakes. Brandon, we literally had a company meeting this morning that you missed. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. We did do a meeting.

It was maybe 10 minutes long. We did. I'm just trying to hold you accountable. All right. It was a company meeting? It was a meeting. Yeah. I just had a meeting with everyone basically.

The entire meeting was everyone's got to suck it up. Yeah. This office sucks. The new office – But you didn't tell anybody that was happening. It was on your calendar. The new office, which I went and saw on Thursday, is even better than I imagined. And everyone's got to just suck it up and do a good job because we fired a lot of people.

And then Brandon showed up an hour after that meeting. Yeah, which sucked. I mean, I left my house at 8. I should have pranked you and gotten you fake fired on Thursday. Why? Why should you have done that? Out of all the goddamn people. I should have had Nicky Smokes do it.

We got Ben Mintz going down there retrieving a tea at Ole Miss and you're going to fake fire me. It should have been a Nicky Smokes joint. I should have done that. I want Nicky Smokes to it. We got Ben Mintz going down there retrieving a T at Ole Miss, and you're going to fake fire me. It should have been a Nicky Smokes joint. I should have done that. I want Nicky Smokes to tell Brandon he has a bloated salary. Dude, I'm going to unleash Nicky Smokes on the pranks. Oh, yeah. It's coming.

Everyone, no one is safe. I'm going to tell him he can get me too anytime he wants. Yeah, and nothing is too far. Whoopie cushions. Nothing, yeah. Yeah, as long as there's no death. Maming, fine fine maim's fine maiming is completely fine uh by the way we're sponsored by high noon it's time to load up the

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theme oh my god oh am I allowed to say anything no that's oh no okay it's a giant like t-rex I think that you have to go through but I saw on Instagram I follow these Chicago accounts like and it's right it's like holy yeah oh my god Holy shit. Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, it does look like a car. Wait, but that doesn't look like a maze. Yeah. If you just stay on the outside of the... No, I think that's nice. If you zoom out, it's way bigger than that. It's, like, so much bigger than that.

Oh, that's a maze. Holy fuck. Jesus Christ. Holy fuck. These can take, like, five hours to get through. Like, they can take forever. All right, so, TJj are we in contact with them all right so we should hit them up and rent it for a day it's probably pretty expensive to rent

that we're mega yeah yeah on a monday or something it's slow down yeah yeah or we do it at night this the drone shots are going to be great yeah we all should have to wear like a different distinct color t-shirt so people can see from above while we're in there. Oh, that would be cool. So people would be able to watch from above. Oh, man. I can't wait for that. All right, TJ.

You want to do the wheel for who gets $1,200? I think it's $1,250. Yep. Yep. Yep. That looks good. Eliminator. Eliminator. Eliminator, yep.

That's what I was going to say. So $1,250. Whoa. Yeah, good. Good. Shit. Wait, you said Eliminator. Good! Shit! So wait, you said eliminate. This makes you the bad guy. I roll with it.

Oh man. Damn it. Fucking A. TK, bye bitch! Bye bitch? What are you guys going to buy with your $12.50? I'm going to upgrade all my flights to first class. Fuck yes. You could do that anyway. No.

With my card. Fuck. No, actually I upgraded today. Yeah, do it. I used my card. I felt guilty. Shout out to Son of a Boy Dad for landing a big old guess. Oh yeah, Adam Friedland on stage.

Yeah. That's out today? Yes. How's the reaction been? Dog, good. He's the best. Yeah, he's a nice guy. His show is so funny.

I watched the Cuomo one. Oh, that was so funny. Great episode. Rico, good. Not deserving. That. Great episode. Rico, good. All right. Not deserving. That would have sucked. That would have sucked.

I'm rooting for anyone but Che. The most mad you got during that whole thing was way after taping. Oh, yeah. I heard yelling when I was, like, leaving. Wait, what happened? Oh, yeah. No, there were, yeah, it was the noise. Remember the noise?

Was the argument always about the time slot, or did it pivot to more, like, personal? No, it got personal there were. Yeah, it was the noise. Remember the noise? Was the argument always about the time slot or did it pivot to more like personal? It got personal. I mean, Rico did start just going like dead dad jokes on him. Yeah. Straight to him. We had to cut out dead dad and dead stepdad. Yeah, he was just going hard. Yeah, I forgot about that completely.

It got weird. And it wasn't like a Brandon wanted to cut it. It was like Rico like. Rico requested a cutout. Yeah, it was like Rico like Rico requested a cutout Yeah it was like Rico like How like I remember being in the bathroom and we were all wiping Our face paint off and like peeing

And Rome had to like try And like calm down Brandon and Rico Yeah and what was the noise Brandon makes He did he made the Exact same Yeah that he made Before he struck Devlin that sounds like it was that exactly it was like he's like winding up yeah all right

Ronan Che original yak one or no seven seven seven so you want you want this four times why do we always clarify that every single time? This can't be Che. Can't be Che. Yeah, you won the fucking $12,000, didn't you? How much? Yeah, that was so fucked. I still can't get over that.

We gave him $12,000 because he came in second place in a game show, and then I came in second place in a game show a month before that. I don't think we ever even talked about it. Because you voted for yourself. Dude, yeah, it was never brought up. Never even brought it up on the show. All right, 1-1. Technically, I came in fourth place.

Oh, come on. Fuck. So Che's got two. Imagine how boring Che will be with that 1250. Well, you should throw it in the fantasy pot. You should. That would be fun. That would be the right thing to do.

That would be the right thing to do. You have that option. Two-two. That would be the right thing to do. I would commit half to the fantasy pot. Oh, half. I'd rather nothing. I'd rather nothing.

Three-two Rone. And he eats the taxes. What's the fantasy punishment we have to talk about that I'm specifically not engaged in the fantasy planning you want to do it here I also just know that I'm going to get triggered by whatever

Chase got going on it's going to be really good switch your wifi service what's that you've got to switch that's twisted where does he come Wi-Fi service. You've got to switch the connection to it. Jay, that's twisted. Where does he come up

with this kind of stuff? Worst punishment ever. You have to set up a savings fund. Did he win? Jay, that got a little dark. Game seven. You get to drive

from Cleveland to Chicago. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. God fucking damn. Yes, Roan's the winner. Oh, Roan won. Okay. Roan stop, stop, stop, stop. God fucking damn. Yes, Roan's the winner. Oh, Roan won. Okay. Roan is the winner. That's good.

Congrats, Roan. Good job, Roan. Roan doesn't need the money either. Nah, dude. He could use a little cash. Everyone could use a little cash. Everyone could use $1,250. Yeah, why not?

You could use that, Brandon. Not you? Sure could, yeah. Jesus Christ. Yeah, Brandon, do you not have furniture? I don't have furniture, no. He does not have furniture. What?

You moved in two years ago. I said when I get here, I was going to – I bought beds, but I haven't bought a dining room table yet or anything. I need to buy it, but I just haven't done it yet. You said you bought beds like you just bought beds. It's so easy, though, when you get to a house and you need a couch and you need a table and you need $10,000 worth of furniture. It's so easy to not buy those things. You just adjust, move on.

You're talking to a bunch of people that have also moved. Yes. We're all in the same boat here and all of us got furniture. You moved into a furnished apartment. Oh, he got you there. He got you there. I've been here for three days and I have my couch, dining room, table. Your mom came out and did that for you. Nope.

No, she didn't. She's coming next week to help with decor. Okay. Brandon, my apartment is just a couch. Your apartment doesn't have room for anything. The hell is that supposed to be? You had to choose between air conditioning and TV? That was my old apartment. Oh, I'm sorry.

Excuse me. It's jarring. Last time I'm sorry. Excuse me. Rice. You also, it's jarring. Last time I ever tried to relate to anything you say. Like, trying to back you up. Oh, you were? Your apartment's too fucking tiny to have. Sorry.

All right. The foyer when you walk into Brandon's house has nothing. I think that's the jarring part, Brandon. I think you've got to get something in that room at least. Yeah. The first impression is not great. Well, that wall was being painted, Titus. I don't know if you noticed that.

I did not notice that. That wall was being painted. That's why nothing was in there. That ended up being the room that Tommy and I played the Oculus in. But I had the chance. We played Oculus one day on the Yak, and I was like, I need to buy this. Bought it, never opened it. That was because I brought my Oculus in and haven't touched it since. I was like, I need to buy this. Bought it and never opened it. That was because I brought my Oculus in and haven't touched it since.

I was like, I need it so bad. Yeah. And I just never, ever played it. Yeah. Did you see Barstow as a new best interviewer? Who? Kevin McDougal. Really?

Did you see him interviewing at the PLL? Yeah, he got, the little kid just dissed him. No, well, it was, he asked the best question ever and he framed it so perfectly and it was so easy to follow do you have the clip that quigs tweeted dudes what an idiot i love this this solidifies him as maybe world's dumbest well he was asking people who the who the mvp should Oh, dude.

What the fuck? Play it again. All right, we're asking people who the MVP should have been. Who should the MVP should have been? All right, we're asking people who the MVP should have been. Who should the MVP should have been? All right, we're asking people. Can somebody remix that?

He already did. Dukes was literally made in a, like, stoolie lab. Yeah. Just like a lax bro. Not the smartest, but very lovable. He's just the best. Since I moved, I have not seen Dukes. Well, he broke his ankle, and then he was out of the office for a long time.

Because of a broken ankle. Because of a broken ankle, I think. Yeah. He was playing lacrosse, right? Yeah, he was playing lacrosse for a long time. Because of a broken ankle. Because of a broken ankle, I think. Yeah. He was playing lacrosse, right? Yeah, he was playing lacrosse in his alumni game and snapped his ankle. Probably that is the lowest you can be. Yeah. To be an adult man and get like a catastrophic injury.

That's worse than wearing a t-shirt during sex. Yes. Oh, easily. That is. But he also, he handled it in a shocking way. What do you mean? Have you seen the video? Oh, yeah. He was just like, yeah, it's broken. It's broken. Snapped it in a shocking way. What do you mean? Have you seen the video? Oh, yeah.

He was just like, yeah, it's broken. It's broken. Snapped it. Yep. Broken. No reaction. Who do you think should have been the MVP? Who should have been the MVP?

Who should have been? All right. We're asking people who the MVP should have been. Who should the MVP should have been? He reset and he still fucking lost. He just tossed it and showed us. Remix that. That's something.

Who should the MVP should have been? He also got just denied a high five from a little kid that he was interviewing that I didn't even understand what he was doing when he was interviewing. Rowan can work that line into a freestyle. Something. Who should the MVP should have been? Who should have been the MVP should have been? Who the MVP should have been?

He's got bars. Towers, baby. Towers. Towers. Come on, right here! No, come on. Ow! Oh, there it is.

Oh, my God. He's growing the game. What the hell was that? He's growing the game. Where is this happening? Why is he with a bunch of children, Gillette? There is a Miny vibe to the video that was a yes yeah i mean he is truly like this i mean to pick him last year i'm gonna miss him

on pick him but when he screwed up when we did the uh pick them parlay every week and he screwed up i think he put in like toledo instead of tulsa and like maybe 300 people bet it before we switched it he then tried to he started down the path of venmoing people yeah and he got like three people in and he was like wait i can't afford this this was before he told you guys yeah he was dming people being like send me your venmo and he got to like the fifth person that's like this is thousands of dollars oh he's something else. Dukes.

All right. So what is this? Oh, this is him. Oh, my God. Oh, fuck. Fix his hair. Got a good hair fix. Snapped.

Snapped in half. He had to use the little scooter thing for a while, right? Yeah. If the doctor made me use one of the scooter things, I would just take the leg off. Yeah. Just amputate my leg. I'm not going rolling around new york on a scooter that's worse than t-shirt sex is yeah guy with a scooter yeah but it's the scooter where you just rest your knee on the pad and they like push with the other leg

it looks really fun yeah i don't know kids in high school used to have those and everyone would just be like what the yeah that's that nate had a scooter right yeah is he fully back yeah he's fully okay uh he's going to uh uh physical therapist yeah that's getting his foot cupped that's right he just stepped out of a cab right yeah yeah yeah i think he like missed a step it was like a suv and they have those like little ledges yeah just went fully i wish i could have seen it yeah connor was oh yeah that's right and he said that nate was complaining about it and he was like dude you're fine and then nate like went to the hospital and he like was his foot was like shattered one of the worst feelings is being drunk and having an injury and being like i think i'm okay and then waking up and be like no i'm not

okay at all i'm the opposite i every injury i get I get drunk, I think it's the worst thing in the world and it's fine. Really? Yeah. I'm a pussy. I've fucked up my ankle before drunk and I was like, toughed it out and was like, I'll be fine, I'll be fine. And then woke up and was like, this is a disaster. Like a complete disaster. Alright, what else do we have before we do this fantasy draft that I'm nervous about?

Any other catch-up stuff? What do you mean, what do we want to do with the wheel? Okay, we're in purgatory. Oh, my God. I think we retire name. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of names.

We'll reset it for purgatory. I think so. There's no right answer. You know that. Whatever we do, they're going to be mad. So the last time we spun it, we hit Carbone, right? Yeah, which I owe everyone Carbone. So that was a big thing.

So yeah, let's reset it now. Carbone resets the wheel. Say that. A new season resets the wheel. We've always done it that way. Purgatory season. Well, we reset it then. Do people still care about the wheel? Yeah, I think people still like it. People passionately careets the wheel. We've always done it that way. Purgatory season. Well, we rescheduled then. Do people still care about the wheel?

Yeah, I think people still like it. People passionately care about the wheel. People still like it. I like it. It's just like the Inception totem. What's the wet? Knowing that we're doing the act. What?

What's the wet move here? I think water bottles. We do have a shower in the new office. Yeah. Yeah, maybe take the name wheel off and make it just... Make it... You know what? Yeah, let's make it boring

and then when we unveil the new office we'll have a lot of fun stuff we can put on there because we're going to have all that space. People are going to be mad no matter what.

Yeah, we live in Chicago now and so we're allowed... Let's add buy a gun my friend's buying a gun tomorrow what yeah yeah wait in colorado yeah well which friend it's actually his reasoning for buying the gun was kind of horrifying oh no and it made me be like well maybe you shouldn't get a gun what'd did he say? He was just like, because we're going camping. And he's like, well, should I get the gun before? And I was like, I don't hate that because I'm always worried about like bears and mountain lions out there.

Right. And he was like, no, I'm more worried about like someone coming into our tent in the middle of the night and like murdering us. He's like, you're always hearing about that happening. What? And I'm like, I don't think I've ever heard about that happening. Yeah. And he was like, you think you're're never gonna face violence in your life and i'm like i'm pretty sure that almost everyone in the world will not have that situation happen to them yeah literally almost every single person on earth a camping trip in colorado someone trying

to murder you a guy coming into our tent in the middle of the night and stabbing us all that was his hypothetical that he pitched. Is he going to sleep with the gun? The gun's not going to help, really. Yeah. Someone wants to murder you. Also, if one dude shows up to our tent and kills three grown adults, we kind of had that coming. That's true. We couldn't defend ourselves off of one dude.

But yeah, that's his reasoning. What kind of gun is he getting a nine millimeter that's not gonna stop a bear no no that's gonna make a bear even more it would scare away a bear but if you hit it when the bear just gets so mad if you hit like every shot it might kill a bear all right yeah he'll be good with it i just want him to get it so i can shoot it i want to shoot it yeah why is that the case It won't hurt the bear. Like if a human was big enough, would a nine millimeter. Yeah.

I don't know. Like police use nine millimeters. I don't think a bear, like you'd have to hit a bear at the perfect shot. Or you'd have to hit it in its face. Yeah. Is there a size a human can be that a nine millimeter gun will not harm them? It will always. It would harm the bear still.

Giants don't exist. What are you asking? So you're saying that if there were hypothetically a 12 foot human, would a 9mm be 12 feet tall? I don't know how tall. I think they're probably around. No, they're probably 8 to 10.

What about a super obese person? Yeah, the fat belly. Yeah. She shot herself. Belly fat. No, that's not how the human body works. Yeah, but she shot herself in the leg accidentally. No.

Because your fat doesn't mean your tissue is stronger. No, but it might slow down the bullet. It would probably slow it down. No. Yeah. I don't know. It's a bullet. It's not a bear to a bear at all.

It's a bullet. Yeah, but bullets eventually stop. Don't you think if you were just. Not in a fat person. Being fatter is better to stop a bullet. It's a bullet. Yeah, but bullets eventually stop. Don't you think if you were just... Not in a fat person. Being fat is better to stop a bullet than being skinny. Definitely. Absolutely. Being skinny, you don't have as much land area.

You might be able to avoid the bullet. If you get shot when you don't have your shirt on, you're definitely going to die. If you do have your shirt on, you might have a chance. I don't know about that at all. That's a fact. You know how much it would hurt to get shot without your shirt on? Brandon, stand up and let us shoot you. Let's just see.

How tall is a bear? How tall is a bear? A bear is 12 feet tall. If you were committed to mostly sports, the first episode would be you getting shot. Just let us shoot you. Where are you going to shoot me? Shoulder? I don't know.

I'll close my eyes and just point. Well, if I'm going to get shot, either the thigh or the shoulder, I think. You'll wear a helmet. Put a helmet on. Thigh is dangerous. Thigh, yeah. Isn't that the arteries? I think that's up in here.

No, I'm pretty sure the thigh you can bleed out. Isn't that where like Sean Taylor was? Yeah. Yeah, but I think it was in the groin. I don't remember Blackhawk down. They were like at his leg trying to hold them. I don't watch movies about the military. People also kill themselves with their thigh arteries.

Kate, did you see people get shot when you were over there? I actually saw more people who got shot like stateside fucking up. Oh. Yeah. One at the range shot herself in the foot. Oh. A guy who unloaded a saw into his buddy's leg. That was upper leg.

What? Yeah. Was he okay? I think so. Unloaded a saw? Yeah, it's like a 5-5-6 round, you know. I don't know at all.

Oh, we gotta do this on most of sports. Show one. That's a good idea. Live on the air. I don't think the goggles are doing much in this. Thank God this cannonball didn't get me in the eye. That was like the fattest man in the world at that time. Oh, yeah.

That guy's like 33 years old. Yeah. How do you figure out how do you figure out how to survive that? Bears are not that small. He's a senior in high school. He's 33 and he's morbidly huge.

Grizzlies can reach up to 9 feet. They're the biggest. Right. But how heavy? Probably, I would guess, like 1,200 pounds. Oh, wow. Polar bears are only 8 feet?

Oh, okay. That's them bent over, yeah. That's them bent over. So when they stand up on their hind legs, they're definitely bigger than 12. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's scary. No, the grizzly said it went on hind legs 9 feet. Does that include –

I don't know. Is that his vertical? Is he in Jordans? Is that in shoes? Yeah. What were we talking about? It's in shoes, yeah. In shoes, okay.

Is it combine height? No. Oh, there it is. What's the person? She's got an ass. Yeah. Dib, dib, dib, dib, dib, dib. Damn.

That park ranger's got fucking. Holy shit. God damn. Guys, I have to have that. Shit. I like how we're looking at bear heights and it's just completely sidetracked. What's her? I mean, look at her.

What's her Instagram? She's perfect. When do you think, what level do you think you'd be do you think you wouldn't be able to fuck that bear up? What do you mean? Well, she's 5'9". She's hot. Do you think you could fuck the, like, where? I think that little bear.

That little bear. I would snap its neck. The first two, I'm fine. No, the second one, probably. I'll say it. I think I'd fuck up a polar bear. That thing is so funny. You think you'd fuck up any animal, though.

That's horrifying. You can't prove it. That would be like... Standing would be at the top of those... That would be way higher than that. Okay. And then big trees fall hard. I'd just go after its leg.

That's true. Take out its knee. ACL. Yeah, but what would he go after of yours? I'd be underneath him. He wouldn't be able to do shit. If a bear was standing like a polar bear and you kicked it in the groin would it have a similar effect as a human yes yes

have you ever seen that video of the bear hitting it whipping itself in the balls hilarious there was balls that hang like yeah no dude i i saw it like maybe a couple months ago bear whipped itself in the balls with like a sweet set and it was yeah here it is watch this i've never seen this yeah it's great what is he even trying he's getting after it yeah he's having fun oh he's scratching he's getting yeah oh yeah he Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's nice. He blows on it. He's got a feel. Oh!

Oh! He hit him right away. Oh, look at that. Oh, yeah. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, that's so awesome. It's so unsettling. Go again.

I got blows. Oh, man. The little sound unsettling. Go again. I got a little... Oh, man. The little sound. That shit was fucking funny. He went right to the wide leg. We've all been there. Oh. Oh!

He flicked himself. We've all done this. Like that shimmy where you're like, maybe if I untangle him, I just loosen it up. Going around. So hurt. So, yeah, just hit a bear in the balls. That's fucking great.

That was so good. Bears just like us. Yeah. It's funny that you could just do that with any animal. It would make me laugh so hard it's like the universe any animal hitting the balls yeah yeah it's great um all right so what i don't want to even ask what's this fantasy league i made it so excited i'm sorry this is gonna be i made it as big cat friendly as possible oh man oh what does that even mean

that was my timer for five players essentially no updates throughout the year maximum of two wait start again start again start again five players one quarterback one running back one receiver one tight end and one kicker okay that's it okay i like it so far five players uh normal scoring points per reception all All touchdowns. Six points. Field goals. Three points.

Field goals. 50 yards and above. I don't really care about the scoring. What else is involved in this? So maximum of two roster moves per year. Okay. I like that. If a guy gets hurt.

You're fucked. You can add. Yeah. Then you only get two all year. So this is not really fantasy. So we're going to draft this way. We're going to do a wheel. I have a question for you because this ran into an issue I had with PMT when we did the So this is really fantasy. So we're going to draft this way. We're going to do a wheel.

I have a question for you because this ran into an issue I had with PMT when we did the Dingers Only League. What happens if one of the players is a pedophile? Good question. Because we technically didn't have a drop. We had an injury drop but not a pedophile drop. You have two, so you can use them however you want. Can we use the injury drop for a pedophile? No. Allegedly. There should be a pedophile drop as well. There should be one pedophile. Two injury drops, one pedophile you have you have two so you can use them however you want and we use the injury drop for a pedophile no that's not alleged it should be a pedophile drop as well there should be one pedophile two injury drops one pedophile one pedophile one alleged pedophile what if they're

a pedophile but they're playing the best they've ever played well that wonderfront what if there's a having a pretty good season oh what if he's a pedophile that got hurt you have to make then you have to decide which one you want to keep your pedophile drop open. Okay. So we only get to move the player. He's like, okay, all right, we'll put in the bylaws. Pedophile drop. If we have two injury adds and drops, do we have a pedophile add as well? The adds can be whatever you want. You can add a pedophile.

Add to the draft. There's pretty much nothing. It can be pedophiles, bi-week. What about if you have a player, you've already used your two roster moves, and you're like, I'm willing to allege that he's a pedophile and then drop him? Would pedophile charges count? They would need to hold up in court. If you start the story, do they count?

You would have to take it to court somehow and prove it. You would have to formally charge that player. I'm just thinking of loopholes here. Now, when you say we have two roster moves throughout the rest of the season, can't we just change the rules whenever we want throughout the entire season? No, because we don't want to make it...

We don't want to make us have to pay attention too much. We want to make it very easy to follow. So I'll make graphics for everyone. You're going to have five players. Okay. So this is not an actual... This is like... We're also going to do trivia for this.

But it seems like this is like we do the draft and then it's over. It's like, well... We'll follow it throughout the the winning the winner is going to get a thousand bucks cash we're going to put 100 bucks and then a first class ticket to the super bowl the loser is going to have to get to the super bowl which is in vegas by ground yeah so drive train whatever you want to do oh by the by the way, we got breaking news. Oh. Mean girls are getting dragged again.

Yeah, I saw that. Oh, by who? Man, they're getting dragged again. By who? Everybody. Where's the bathroom? Now, this is a little bit. Key right here.

There's a key. This is a little bit people are just being a little soft because they don't like them. But, yeah, it is a, they put up a tweet. Sorry, not sorry. When you show up to work Monday, not fired, even though all the stoolies wish you were. So 100 people did get fired on Thursday. It sucked. But also –

They did it, though, so good for them. Yeah. It's all that matters. They're celebrating it. But it's also not Monday. It's not Monday. Monday was a holiday. Oh, right.

And Monday was a holiday, and then Gooch said, I was here all day. I never saw you guys. So when did they film it? This is such a shitty and tone-deaf tweet. Also, it's Tuesday. But it's not like one of their own mothers got laid off. Yeah, that's true. This is a tough one for me because it does feel like people are piling on to, I don't know, read the room guys.

Are we being that serious? I know it sucked, but are we being that serious that we're doing read the room tweets on them? It says it right there. They're not sorry. It is Tuesday. See, this is now when Bailey Carlin is coming at you. I'm starting to now have to side with the Mean Girls. He twisted for me.

I'll say the Mean Girls look great in the video. Can I add one little thing? I mean, it's a stupid tweet by them, but I also- Most of them are. Yeah, we are kind of taking this too seriously. We're being like showing, okay. Can I add one little layer to it? Oh, Michelangelo.

All right. I mean, I guess I'm just going to, I'll sit this one out. That's a New York thing, man. Yeah. I do. I mean, it is fun to watch everyone pile on, but I guess it's more the tone of being like, if you're like this is so tone deaf like what you are you that offended i guess i don't know if it was intentionally a shot

it definitely wasn't intent no they weren't taking a shot at the people who were fired they're taking a shot at the people that dislike them and they're dumb okay they are dumb yeah right so yeah if it was someone else at this company that people generally like. Well, they probably wouldn't be that dumb. Probably wouldn't be that dumb. Like it's, yes. How offended are we really? Right, that's my thing.

Is it an opportunity to. It's a dumb tweet. Yeah. I'm not offended. Yeah. So to act offended feels like you're just doing that for show. Can I just point out that Ben Mintz scheduled his triumphant return blog about him getting fired for Thursday morning.

Oh, I love it. He's the best. See? Last Thursday morning. He's also dumb. That's actually a good point. Lovable but dumb. Wait, I missed the Mean Girls thing. What happened? So they tweeted... They're celebrating not getting fired. What's wrong with that? People got fired. People are celebrating not getting fired. What's wrong with that? People got fired.

People are now acting indignant. Seth, give us your honest take. I don't know. I don't know. I would never make a video like that. It's a dumb video. Thank you. Yeah, that's what I said.

It's dumb. But then people are, Barstow employees are quote treating it being like this is so tone deaf. How could you possibly do this? That feels – if you're that offended by it, that's – So is Bailey Carlin just the online commenter about Barstool? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Duke said they should have been fired, should have been. I mean but isn't that their whole thing? Yeah, they're dumb but isn't that their whole thing?

Yeah. Isn't that their whole thing to make videos? They also are the mean girls. Right. No, they're the mean girl. Okay. Great point, Brandon. Thank you, Mark.

And you can find more great points like that every day. I mean, the other thing is... I saw Michelangelo tweeted about it. Yeah, and other thing is. I saw Michelangelo tweeted about it. Yeah. And I feel bad. I mean, like, Michelangelo, Nick Buono, I loved working with. Yeah. All the, like, pretty much the entire Stella Blue team got fired, which sucked a lot.

So, yeah, there was a lot of people that were, like, really good people. But I guess I just, i'm more than just like watching it being like they're just dumb yeah that's what it seems right like it's it they're just dumb they i don't think i don't see it as them taking a shot at people if they are then they're assholes also i feel like their uh podcast should be trying to like branch out of the barstool world oh i'm more than niche what and nick bono was their producer oh that okay that's dumb that's even dumber oh that's even dumber he was okay now i'm starting to get on the other side their producer yeah their producer got fired yeah i forgot about that i forgot about

that taunted yeah lauren like lauren we worked with very closely it's tone deaf it's tone deaf and dumb it's tone deaf they did not read the room no they did not read that's my definitely made the day mistake on purpose for more interaction right so the wife the day mistake like obviously it's not monday yesterday was a holiday i feel like everyone knows like obviously they didn't show up they if they showed up to work yesterday nobody was there i'm sure they would have said something about it if that's the video they're putting out no so you think they think they purposely got the day wrong? Yes.

Is what you're accusing them? I just think they're really, really dumb. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. Don't they not like when people get mad at them, too? Yeah, no, they're sensitive and dumb.

Yeah, that's not a good quality to have. It's a bad combo. I believe if you're going to be like that, you've got to be like, fuck that, I don't care. That's not that bad. Yep. It's okay. So, yeah, I was just trying to give my honest reaction. I don't know if I'm...

Well, I was indifferent until I realized that Nick... That part is interesting. Nick is their producer. Yeah. Yeah, that's pretty ruthless. That is. That feels like that's going ruthless. That is. That feels like that's going... I don't think it was an attack on

people. Right. Maybe I'm giving them too much credit. Maybe they are just really mean. Oh my god. Yeah. That never happened. What if I'm thinking about it the wrong way? I think it's much more interesting if they're mean. Right. What if I'm thinking about it the wrong way where I'm giving them too much credit for being dumb and they're actually just ruthlessly mean?

I don't even think it's a mean video. I just think it's like a, like, what's the point of the video? A very dumb video. To just be like, we didn't get, we have our jobs. We didn't get fired. And also Labor Day is Monday and we weren't actually, we filmed this on like Friday. Hmm. Well, Alex Penn is back.

Hmm. All right. All right. That was our mean girls discussion. I don't know. So this fantasy. Yeah. I'm like, I don't really have a... There's not really much to say.

Yeah. I mean, anyone could make that video. But we're talking about him. But would anybody make it? True. Anyone in the world could be like, hey, guess what? Didn't get fired today. Should we make that video?

Well, not everybody. The ones who got fired couldn't make it. Yeah, you could make a video every day. Just say, I didn't die today. Make that video. I didn't die. Another day, not dead. Still.

Yeah. Not dead. Sorry, haters. The Nick Mono part does definitely yeah had Nick film that yeah I feel bad about that part that's fine hey Nick one last thing why last yeah I think content POV that Monday feeling when you didn't let get let go Nick cool if you just throw the captions on that yeah as you're walking out the door oh they took all my editing software away that's alright you can find a way to do it you could tell it was filmed with one

hand because there's a cardboard box underneath they're not liked in a new york office i would say yeah i mean they're never there yeah i don't know if they care yeah yeah i don't think they care yeah they probably don't care i think it looks like they're living a fun life um okay back to this fantasy league this draft will be fun it's john rich made a jeffrey that makes me think that to be fun. I just don't understand the idea of not having it be just like a normal fantasy. Well, sad. So we don't have to pay attention during the year. Yeah, but I wanted to do a real fantasy. That was the whole idea.

I was like, we should do a fantasy league to stay in touch. What about a fantasy league where there's no... I think this will do that. But it's not. It's just going to be like, we got our players and then... No, because there's inevitably going to be injuries. There's going to be fun stuff during the year. Can we trade, because there's inevitably going to be injuries. Oh, I don't think so. Can we trade?

Can you trade pedophiles? You can trade pedophiles. You can trade a pedophile with an injured, not an injured with a pedophile. Okay. What if there's no rules whatsoever and you have to come in and... We don't even keep score. You have to come in and argue why you think you won. I like that.

Oh! Yeah, and you're just like, I had these guys. I felt like they played really well. We should have like... Everyone argues and then the chat votes on who won. Yeah, like the player that had the coolest play. Yeah. Che would win that every week. That's your argument.

It's like, the rest of my guys suck, but you see that play. Yeah. So for that reason, my team wins. We should have won. Yeah. All right, so five players? Five players. Very digestible.

I'll make everyone a graphic list. How many is it? How many standard? How many standard? Like 15? We should just do like one player. This is as boiled down, I think, as it is. No, it's not one player.

One player would be as boiled down as possible. Well, I'm still looking to do a normal fantasy league if anyone wants to join me. Do you guys know that Roan just does like a million yeah yeah he does public leagues yes yeah he's addicted to yeah he was doing drafts in like July July yeah I kind of like that Adam Brandon will you grab me a water thank you what did Brandon get up for I don't know. Get to go make a video not fired today. Oh. What the fuck, Brandon? Oh, it was me. It was me.

It was me. I can own up. Okay. Start at the top again. So we're going to wheel for order. Right. John Rich made a Jeopardy board. Okay.

So there's two columns in each. This is how we're drafting yeah i actually like this okay okay this is gonna be fun this looks like more work we had a third kicker this looks like it's more work than the actual nfl draft so the values don't necessarily so just say like we're gonna go quarterback running back receiver tight end kicker in that order um we'll do a wheel for the order let's say you pick first brandon pick second it's going to be a trivia question the trivia questions are about 70 percent general trivia 30 percent yak trivia so if you want let's say the the player pool is the top eight average draft position so the most top eight most commonly drafted so we're all going

to have awesome teams yes yes but there's two sleepers so guys that are not as good one of them is tua one of them's aaron riders for quarterbacks so technically if tua gets hurt you might need to use your ad drop or maybe that's like a little bit of an added storyline okay but um you'll go through so if you get the question right for quarterbacks and you're picking first you get your pick of the litter of quarterbacks that you want if you get it wrong you then go to the bottom of the line and you know we'll see how many people get them right or wrong then we can pick from that aspect but you got one trivia question per position so five total trivia questions oh they deleted the tweet and then you what they deleted the tweet yeah no way

that's pussy behavior they must be now i hate that yeah you gotta double now i really hate because you could make the argument that, oh, engagement. Look, they're getting all this engagement. Now you can't make that argument. Now they suck. Maybe they're just fixing Monday to Tuesday. That would be awesome. That would be awesome.

That would be fucking awesome. Holy shit, that would rule. You got us, guys. Labor Day was Monday. If they put out a no tap apology just saying they got the day wrong or so I'm deleting the tweet means I hate the tweet yeah like that's now like because they could play the like just total troll move of like well we got engagement yeah I was talking about it fuck that which play is I mean that, that's true. Yeah, except for the sensitive part.

Sure. Okay. Who's drafting? You want to talk about, or let's pick the draft or then we'll talk about Steel Wheel. Steel Wheel, maybe Trade Wheel. Okay. Okay. I want to make this as confusing as possible.

That's so us. It'll be fun or active and short. And then what's the punishment? We're going to have to, someone's going to have to go to the Super Bowl via land? So you guys did something similar. Yeah, we did. It was exactly the same. Yeah, it was.

I think we do have to take bus. Okay. Yeah, public transportation. Oh, man. Ground. Amtrak should be. Brandon, bus. Yeah, bus. Yeah, bus.

Okay, what about this? What about this? What about this? Someone has to drive to the Super Bowl with Jenks and Frank. I promise you I'd kill myself. That's the blood. You could pick. What about you could pick one or the other?

The blood would be on your hand. You could pick one or the other? The blood would be on your hand. You could pick one or the other. Jenks and Frank in a car. I like both those guys. I would just rent a Sprinter. This is a lot of time with anybody. In the back row. That's fine.

But one or the other. You got to pick one or the other. And the Mean Girls. I would not want to do a bus. The Mean Girls and Frank. Bus, I think, is the worst. I told my wife this in complete earnestness yesterday I think I want to just buy a sprinter van and I just like to own like owner

sprinter just to have it yeah like one of those like nice ones but like they're expensive like the Mercedes they are very really expensive very expensive I mean they're they're like figures what. Oh. I mean, what would you – How much a car costs. What would make you think that that was cheaper than a car? Right. It's bigger than a car. Yeah.

But I don't know. You don't really see that many of them around. I don't know. That'd be like me being like, I want to buy an 18-wheeler. And not you. It's only 15K. I think they're cool. You got like a bunch of rows.

It's nice. As the cars get bigger, they usually get more expensive. Yeah, why don't you just rent a U-Haul? No, I want you got like a bunch of rows it's nice as the cars get bigger they usually get more expensive yeah why don't you just rent a U-Haul no I want you to buy a limo own a U-Haul buy an old limo oh that would be sick

that would be awesome or a school bus a school bus would be awesome a short bus I bet you could get a used school bus for pretty cheap yeah if there are any Sprinter van companies out there

that want to you have my attention Mercedes damn Che got sponsored by Mercedes were pretty cheap. Yeah. If there are any Sprinter van companies out there, they want to give you a 100-day Sprinter van? Damn, Che got sponsored by Mercedes. Mercedes is running a new ad campaign for their vans.

The thing that they're least known for. Yeah, I've never even seen one of them on a commercial. No. Sprinter van? That would be hilarious. They don't have to advertise for them. Yeah, I don't think they one of them on a commercial. No. Sprinter van? That would be hilarious.

They don't have to advertise for them. Yeah, I don't think they do. They're a need-based purchase. Yeah. Right, so if they're looking to tap into a new market, hit me up. You? You are the new market? Nobody who doesn't need a Sprinter van is going to buy a Sprinter van.

No, but they're actually very practical and cool. But they're not because you can't get in garages and shit. Yeah, that's awesome. That's eight years old. you can't get in garages and shit. Yeah. That's awesome. That's eight years old. You can get it for $75. Okay. When I get an Uber and they pull up in a Sprinter van, I want to fucking kill myself. It has the big handicap thing on the hood.

I get so angry. And that big ass door comes down. Dude, that would be awesome. I mean, Sprinter vans rule. Yeah. Yes. I think we're giving. Well, no.

I actually don't. I don't want to. That's awesome. Sprinter vans do not rule conversion vans rule I would rather have an RV yep if any wood head yes a convert nice conversion super soft RV too yeah but the conversion van you can actually drive it in like park it places that you can't with a Sprinter van it's got curtains yeah like this this is what i want look that's 18 grand inside look at that little tv that's pretty much a mini yeah you would use that less than you would use your oculus me yeah oh i would never use it but it would be sick to have sit in a garage how much money was the merch bonus?

Just buy a car with a... Oh, shit. I kind of want to bid on that. Actually, what if we did drive to Vegas and we had to do it in a $1,200 car? That would just be... We had to buy the worst car possible. What if we had to drive to Vegasgas with a motorcycle that would be we would which one who here would survive you hire somebody to drive you there but you're in the side car or you're just in the bitch seat you just gotta hold on buddy

a stranger so good what about like by ferry now it's in las vegas or like you get like a cross to the other side. It's in the desert. Go through the Panama Canal. That was a Mean Girls tweet you just did. Real life. You just did a Mean Girls tweet. I'm trying to think of what would be like the most interesting.

Like what if you had to take like, what if you had to get there but you had to take like 15 flights minimum? Oh. Yeah, you fly but you can only go. Wait, what about you have. State to state. You have to fly state to state. Yeah.

You have to use every mode of transport. Yeah. That's fun. Yeah. Starting with like rollerblades. Rollerblades, bike, pogo stick. You could take a boat to like fucking a ferry. Motherfucking

ferry to where? The other side of Chicago? Up to Milwaukee. I live in New York from Chicago to Milwaukee up the lake you also have to hitchhike this is way worse for you Sass as per

what if you had to find stoolies to get you the whole way in the chain of heat that would be too easy they would be lining up that would just be going with jinx like Jerry's guy alright so we'll figure out the punishment. That's yet to be...

Something along those lines. I think we've got to figure that out today. Well, I'm down with doing the... You have two options. What are the two options? Jenks and Frank or bus. We didn't give Jenks and Frank a vote on this? No, they'll come and say... You think Jenks and Frank are going to be like,

no, I don't want a free ride to the Super Bowl? No, I just... it's a long way. It is a long way. Okay, and now. What was that going to be from New York? No, it's. They'll pick you up on the way. Yeah, they got to get here.

Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah, I like that. Driving through the night. But can we rent like a Fiat? Yeah, it's got to be like a Geo Metro. Masa Miata. A clown car. It's got to be like a Geo Metro. Mazda Miata.

Clown car. It's got to be a Geo. A literal clown car. Okay, so and then what else? Anything else? That's it. All right, so we're ready to go. So who's drafting for?

Titus is drafting for Roan. I'll draft for Roan. So it's trivia. So I want to keep it fair. So maybe Rudy drafts for Kyle and does the trivia. Rudy. There you are. Rudy's going to draft for KB. So it's trivia. So I want to keep it fair. So maybe Rudy drafts for Kyle and does the trivia. Rudy. There you are. Rudy's going to draft for KB.

So it's trivia. So you've got to come and sit, and you'll talk in the mic when your spot comes up. Yeah, you want to pull up a chair and we can alternate? This is going to be fun. I'm excited. And we're also doing winner gets $1,000. Travis Kelsey just hyper-extended his knee. Are you serious?

I bet the lions yesterday no way no way missing next week betting you did yeah how'd you 50 bucks damn what'd you bet oh boy florida or fsu to win fuck yes i don't know i lost a lot but then I won a lot, too. That's gambling. Yeah. What are you doing, Steven? What are you doing? Who did you text that to? My friends from home. I strapped a Travis Kelsey last night.

You did? Yeah. It's a hyper-extended knee. He'll be fine. Yeah, he's 35. He's good. Travis Kelsey, not as rich as he should the thing is he's always been good right right he's not as rich i think it's the timing on his contracts have not been the best let me see i looked it up once and i was like oh man like one

of the best tight ends of all time so is jason kelsey net worth just dwarf his because he's a offensive lineman travis kelsey career earnings through 10 seasons is $64 million. That feels light. That feels light. That feels light. Does it not? His endorsement money has to be crazy. Yeah.

Like he's – He's like an icon. He should be like over $100 million right now. I think he will if he finishes out his contract. But kind of a broke boy. Yeah. Kind of embarrassing. Yeah. Okay. are we ready to go

so we're gonna wheel for order and we'll we'll start with quarterbacks and go to the right oh i have to have a football player name in my head uh i texted them to everyone they'll all be there's nobody like okay like it's like a cheat sheet it's pretty much just like you're picking from a group of 10 each time so we will have order of what they should be ranked based on the public um there should be that trade wheel so let's say i really want mahomes and you get him jay sure i can use my one trade wheel where there's one sliver where i get him uh-huh all the rest are that i don't and then one sliver has like Baker Mayfield and wet and wet Okay, lest we forget

All right Trade will tightest on Pornhub to ya. Oh That's not Brandon could go into his settings and clear his browser Not just like the clear like from Safari, like go into like the actual like settings app. He smashed his cash. I just wiped my phone. Yeah.

I actually just Googled what is fantasy football. Okay. Trying to read up on it real quick. Pretty sure. So you're drafting for Roan, Titus, and Rudy's drafting for AB. Yep. Got it. We haven't figured out the space here.

We're good. I'm good if you're good. I the AB. Yep. Got it. We haven't figured out the space here. We're good. I'm good if you're good. I'm not. I like this vibe. It feels good. It's way better than the others. This is first pick. Fucking clicky.

Go figure. All right. So I just pick a category, but they're all 100, right? Oh, we do the whole draft order first? Let's maybe do... I think it would make more sense to do the full draft order, and then we'll go through because it'll be... It's all about...

But this is all for naught if I don't get my question right. Yeah, but you have... It's good because you'll reset. You'll be the first one to reset if you get it wrong. By the way, I just... Because I was sharing the show again, and I saw someone had a great comment in the chat. We should get Turo to sponsor

and we could pick the car from Turo. Ooh. Ooh. Or cars.com. Yeah, let's do either or. Oh, Turo. I thought that was... Yeah, so maybe the loser drives.

And we pick the car. We're not sponsored by Turo currently, are we? I think they've sponsored random... Like, they've done some PMT... Is Chase still holding out on getting Ben's? Yeah. To sponsor him. Yeah.

But no, we'll pick... We don't want to commit to anything. We'll pick the car that the losers have to drive. Love that. Yeah. I'm not allowed to do that. And Turo made that very clear when I was in Los Angeles. Oh, because you're 23? The ultimate betrayal.

Clearly says 18 and older. It's not. Are you 23? No. You're 22? Yeah. When are you 23? Like a year from now april 5th man we'll do a case race yeah i'm done with that we should do a case race for sass's birthday and we should all

drink non-alcoholic beer without him realizing oh that would be awesome if we're all stone cold sober and so good hammered that would be a night i don't think he's gonna give a shit yeah i don't think no he'll just do it it's not gonna affect him one way or the other sass is uh like he's the most consistent case racer because he just hits his groove and it's like i'm off and running well i actually i get i drink yeah fucked up oh you do a great job yeah i enjoy the fuck out of it uh okay so nick you're drafting Yeah. It is funny when people are like, Sass ruined the case race again. And it's like, well, this is what the case... I just gave you what you

wanted. You spent the last 45 minutes telling me I ruined it and telling me my whole world was going to crash down. I ruined it. Be more professional, Sass. But it's like, were they expecting it to be a different outcome than every single case race? Yeah.

We should do our next case race. You should be like super civil to each other and have like no interruptions. Yeah. And people be like, this sucks. Let's do wine. Wine. Yeah, wine. Roll the wine.

Lots of wine. Just make that noise. Okay. Nick, you're up first. Yeah, but are we getting everybody's order? Okay. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Two. Yep. A nice two slot. Wait, is this Snake Draft? No. So it's just consistently one through ten throughout. Oh, nice. We're just picking one.

Two is awesome. Fuck yes. You want to be as early as possible. Hell yeah. So are we redoing the order after every position? No. No. Nick's going to have the first pick of every position?

Yes. Well, that seems crazy. I like this. Ridiculously dumb. All right, you have to. Jay, he's going to be the best player. The loser has to crawl to Vegas on their hands and knees. Yeah, this is ridiculous.

Right, Nick? That's ridiculous. Nick, you like that? Crawl to Vegas hands and knees? Yeah. I'm sorry. I was Nick? That's ridiculous. Nick, you like that? Crawl to Vegas hands and knees? Yeah. I'm sorry. I was just thinking that. I was about to say it.

Did you say that too? So Nick's going to do it, and then there's just nothing that he's done. He has to get a tree question right. But he gets the shot at the first pick every time. Correct. This is how normal draft orders work. Again, we've got to just ride the wave. No, it isn't.

Listen, this is going to be confusing for the entirety of the draft. We'll get to the end, and we'll be like, oh, it kind of made sense. When's the last time you did a draft that wasn't a snake? Good question. Auction drafts. But this isn't an auction draft. Right. This is a draft.

The NFL draft works this way, Che, because the team selecting first was the worst team. So Nick is the worst person here. Well, the problem is I think we should do Snake, but the problem is Chase got the, if you get the trivia wrong, you go to the back of the line. Yeah. So how would you Snake? But he gets the option to go first every time,

so if he gets them all right, he's going to have the best of every position. That's typically what happens when you win the wheel. Yeah. No, it's not. It's very much not. We always Snake. All right, we'll Snake traffic. We got to Snake.

Wait, let's see who goes third first before we snake. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're going to slowly get everyone on our side. I don't think we snake. Yeah, all right. We're good. I think we're good. I don't know. I don't know snake.

Let me throw this idea out. Can I throw this idea out? I don't like your idea so far. Let me throw this idea out. What? We just redo the random. We do the wheel order on every position. It's just a lot.

What do you mean it's a lot? The way you've got it is. Brandon, if we did that, do you know how long it would take to explain what it is? That would take forever. Let's spin for every pick. That would take forever. If it lands on me, I get first pick. If it lands on me again, I get another pick.

Oh. Every pick. That it lands on me again, I get another pick. Oh. Every pick. That's making it worse. But then it messes up if you get it wrong. It messes up. Yeah. Let's just go if you get it wrong. You know, let's go with Stephen's dumb fantasy draft.

I mean, we had to expect this knowing going in. I sent the rules on the – So the draft was really just the wheel. Everyone in this room – No, you still have to get the question right. You still have to get the trivia question right. You have to get the question right. You still have to get the trivia question right. You still have to get the question wrong. You just don't get the answer.

I just don't understand. I don't understand how we jumped from me being like, hey, I want to do a fantasy league to being like, we're just. Everyone in this room. The loser's going to get fucked. I'm just going to remind everyone. There's no effort involved. Everyone in this room, all the people who are watching right now.

After this episode ends, we will never think about it again. They expected this to be the dumbest thing ever. Why don't we just have a wheel to see who crawls to Vegas then? Why didn't you just respond to it? Why didn't you just throw this out before right now? Yeah, why don't you? I don't know. Yeah, exactly.

He was on vacation. I could have never imagined it wouldn't be a snake draft. I'm so happy. You didn't think about this prior to this minute. I never imagined it. I did that on purpose. I wanted to see how dumb this was, and it's proving to be very dumb. Let's go through with it.

Everyone will be fine with their teams. Just be good at trivia, and then you will get the best team. Not if I'm the eighth person that gets the trivia question. We'll see. Do you think everybody in front of you is going to get some of these trivia questions from what I've been told? So if seven of you are dumb, I got a chance. All right, let me ask you this. If you get the trivia question wrong, do you go to the back, and then you stay in the back?

All of the players are good. So it's not like there's a consent like okay you have to remember that that is they all are very very good yes they're all equal pretty much for the most part yes yeah those are some good players yes well they're not so if you have the eighth pick that's not just jefferson dj way better than amari cooper well so the last two are are like unranked guys or like not top ten guys. Justin Jarris, Jefferson, Jefferson, Garrett. All right, let's keep going. We're going to power through. Okay.

Come on, Steven. You got this. All right, so Titus is third. Yep. Titus. Who's writing this down? Okay, Zyze. Thank you, Zyze.

Brandon, you got to remember the rule of the Yak is to just do whatever we do and then complain about it after. Okay. That's the golden rule of the yak. Just if you complain about it before, it usually ends up going your way, and then you look like the guy who complained. But he's a professional fantasy drafter, and he doesn't know the snake rule. I know the snake rule. That's true. You're right.

You're right. For this to work with trivia, it has to go a different way. There you go, Brandon. Ah, damn, never mind. Che, if you just forfeit your pick if you miss the question, isn't that easier than making a whole new line of people waiting to pick? If you forfeit your pick? Okay, I'm first pick.

I get my trivia question wrong. I have to wait until second round, right? Yes. That's how it is right now. Oh, damn, Brandon. Oh, no. Should I just leave now for Vegas? Well, isn't it pretty much whoever gets drafted last,

whoever gets picked last is just going to lose? Definitely not. But the players are all good. You only have five players. They're all good. Yeah, and then they're not allowed to rotate people out of the lineup. There's not a lot of difference between one and eight. We're just tracking their statistics for the season.

I love how your dreams just got crushed. Let's just randomly assign the players to us. I might randomly assign you. That's when it's straightforward to play fantasy football. Well, it's just where they're just like sitting in a tank, and then we're just watching them play, and then checking in at the end of the weekend and being like, oh, that was good.

I don't get the issue. This is crystal clear. That's surprising. The best players in football. All right. I'm going to say it right now. These are all the best players. I'm going to say it right now.

I know. We're going to snake it. It resets and we snake it. That's fair. That's fair. It doesn't. It makes perfect sense. We just snake it.

Okay. We resets and we snake it. So Nick is going to go first. If he gets his trivia question wrong, he goes to the back. And then on the second round, he's last. Yeah. That is pretty simple. That's pretty simple.

It's pretty simple. A snake is not that complicated. Okay, fine. And then Nick's in here. And then everyone has a fair shot. Famous left. Yeah. You've still got to be good at trivia.

We all have a fair shot regardless. Right, but now you get the second pick in the second round. Okay. Which is better, wouldn't you say? Yeah. Yeah. He's still got to be good at trivia. We all have a fair shot regardless. Right, but now you get the second pick in the second round. Okay. Which is better, wouldn't you say? Yeah. Yeah. I don't want it to be, if we play a whole season and people are like, well, I picked last, I got fucked. Right, okay.

It's going to take the fun out of it. Also, now you don't give Brandon an out, which is actually brilliant. Correct. Okay. Which he just left. I think he actually, I can hear his car starting. He's got to start his commute right now. God, I hope he bricks his trivia.

Oh, be sorry. So now it's just general trivia. So then Nick can start with the quarterbacks. Okay. Who wrote this trivia? John Rich. Okay. So it's 70% general trivia, 30% yak.

So just say quarterback and then column and row. You're a big yak guy. You've watched every episode. John Rich did a great job on the kirk show by the way nice did he yeah great yeah i haven't given a full endorsement of who my my dog dropped out of the race so who was your dog uh justin he he went on is that the gay one no it's not the gay one uh just i think he's gay not bisexual yeah uh justin went on and was like i don't want the job like five minutes in he's the guy we had in for yak idol right he might he might move to chicago so he's he might still so we have an agreement we're gonna do a snake if you show one tit.

Steven, I think yours are supple enough to get this video taken down. CJ, is that okay for YouTube? He's leaning back. I don't know. Oh, he went to it. Whoa, that was extremely sexual. No, that's too much jiggle. That's too much jiggle.

I'm kind of getting hard. All right, we're doing steak. That was one of the more sexual reveals I've ever seen Single shot there it was it was crazy crazy what the fuck are you talking like that you're two different pantos give me that t give me that shot tj that's how you sounded yeah all right whatever i was two different colors tj i was your half black side i got jiggly titties all right so we're snaking just because I did that? Well, we were going to snake.

You went to the bathroom. We decided we were going to snake no matter what. And then Stephen made it. And that's what you came up with? Yeah, I don't know why he came up with that. That was crazy. All right, let's get it going. Take a question in a category of a position.

Give me. They're all 100. Wait, before you do the question, Mattress Firm, why did you put the don't mentions? You know I'm like Ron Burgundy. Don't mention any competitors. Don't mention... Okay, all right.

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We'd appreciate it. Go right now. 120 nights free. Okay. Draft time. Draft time. I will take wide receiver for, I guess, 100, please. This is bad because if you don't do well, you might end up with A.J. Brown.

It's literally impossible to have a bad team. Right, that's why, you know. But isn't it fun to have, like, oh, shit, your team sucks. Well, nobody wants to see us drafting Cam Akers in the 12th round. Sash just wants to grind on the waiver wire. I just wanted to play fantasy football. I do like that we all have beast teams. That makes it fun.

It's literally impossible for us to have bad teams. No, because if people get injured and stuff like that. I mean, you have two head. Pedophiles. Yeah. Pedophiles. If you have multiple pedophiles, you're fucked. We've never talked about this on the Yak.

Okay. I don't think I know this. I mean, steel would probably be the best guess but like it turned green what could what turns green copper i'm gonna go copper oh good answer yeah that a boy yeah i guess i'll take patrick oh no i'm wide receiver uh justin jefferson please damn do do running suck you could have ended up with stefan what's the scoring six points for all touchdowns one point per reception and then 10 yards everything so six points for throwing touchdowns too yes okay i'll do uh we should all stick let's all do one category at a time so i'll

do receivers right why no it's very difficult point of a draft. What the fuck? This is not a draft. Let's just click a random button. What the fuck? There's no strategy? No, there's no strategy at all. Once Nick won the wheel, that just locked the whole draft in. Yeah, that's crazy. No, I get to pick whatever I want. Yeah, because what if there's like a...

What? Well, just because, man, it's much easier to keep track of the people who got it wrong. You don't want to draft. We should have just had teams assigned. No, no, we'll keep track. We will keep... I promise you, we'll keep track. So...

It's five players. Yeah. We can't get confused. So what you're worried about is if he had missed the question, he would go to the back of the queue of the wide receiver list. Correct. No. Why can't he just go to the back of the queue of the... Correct.

Yeah, yeah. We'll just have a queue. It's not a position queue. the wide receiver list. Correct. No. Why can't he just go to the back of the queue of the round list? Yeah, yeah. You just have a queue. It's not a position queue. It doesn't matter. Once everyone's made one pick, we go on to round two. I just don't get my pick if I miss it. Do you think this is going how you envisioned?

No. Why did you make it so? Why didn't you just? Why are you blaming me? Because you're the. Why are you blaming me? You're the rapper. You don't get to pick your players.

I'm not the minority. After you came up with this idea, did you, like, look at it and think, what could go wrong with this? Or did you just immediately say – Yeah. Never do. No. I'm not a downside guy. It's a draft that's not a draft.

Last pick is going to end up with, like, Travis, Kelsey, Patrick Mahomes, and Stephon. Damn, I got butt fucking. I love this so much because if up with Travis, Kelsey, Patrick Mahomes, and Stephon. Damn, I got butt fucking hurt. I love this so much because if you told someone, like, what is the Yak, you could just play this and be like, this is what they do. Every single day for a couple hours a day, and it never gets less confusing. Well, if anyone wants to invite me to their fantasy league, I'm open for others. Because I actually wanted to play fantasy. All right, I'll do QBs for 100.

Which 100? First 100. What the fuck? That's pretty easy. Is it? Yeah. Is it? You know this.

You know this, Dan. I feel like you know this. You know this. I don't know. I'm just putting pressure on you. They're both on, like, sports Twitter. They're going to be like, Tom Brady? Roast their ass ass.

Roast these dumb jocks. This one is pretty. This one's pretty. It's got to be Michael Jordan, right? Honestly, I'd pass so you don't embarrass me. So what happens if he gets kicked off? Wait, is there a shot clock? Why steal?

He doesn't get a quarterback. Does the next guy steal or does he? No. You have the next question? You go to the back of the line of the category that you were in, so receiver. No, that's acid. Just in round two is when he gets his next pick. But then it kind of messes up the sleeper.

All right. What? Fuck, fuck, fuck. He wants his sleepers. Never mind. I just don't get, like, that's a, we're going to have to, we need like a giant Excel sheet to keep track of this then. So I can be first in line for quarterback.

Yeah, it's Elon Musk by like 700 bucks. Okay, I thought it was maybe Trump. I thought it was Trump. If you buy the platform and you don't have the most followers, what are you doing? Yeah. I'll take Patrick Mahomes. Great pick. I got a 16.

Great pick, Dan. Great pick. Yeah, great pick. Great pick. I got a sick team. Great pick. Yeah, great pick. Let's go. All right, who's up next? Titus. What are the – yeah, let me see that. Go kicker.

I'll go kicker. This is unfair to Roan because I could just draft the shittiest team. No, but you can. No, you can. You literally can. Also, it doesn't matter. You could take Graham Ganoe as your first pick. By the way, disclaimer, I do not play fantasy football.

I haven't played fantasy football ever. I kind of understand the premise, but I don't know who the fuck's good in fantasy. This is fail safe. You won't fuck him. You'll be fine. Also, he has 100 other leagues. Yeah. I'll go kicker for the third 100 down, please.

Not the top one. No, no top oh no no why oh yeah you're right you're right sorry oh my god this is this is way all right this is the back of the draft next pick next pick tightest in the back of the draft uh uh i'll go you can reveal because we're not gonna recycle questions 38 i Think of a good year. TJ's wearing shorts. He could have cheated. All right. Who's up next?

Zaza. Here we go, Zaza. So, Chase. Tight end 100. Oh, man. What? John Rich. that's a fire name oh yeah i know this one as a member of the cincinnati reds close basketball's not basketball get another answer Yeah, no. Another answer. Fastball. Fuck. Denver Nuggets. It's the Harlan Lutron. That's a tough question.

Okay, Zal's in the back of the draft. But wait, so Che, in your mind, you wanted Zal to be back in line for the tight end? Or whoever, yes. I was picturing us all going down. I don't know why we're even asking this because we're not doing this. But in my mind, everyone was in the same category. And you'd get the back end of that category. Got it. Are we going to run out of trivia questions?

Yeah, I think we're going to run out of trivia questions. What happens when everybody gets them all wrong, and then we're just out of trivia questions? Arm wrestle. Okay. That's why it was built in a certain way. Okay, so no, it's easy. We would have run out anyway.

No, no, no, no. It's fine. There's one trivia question per. Yeah. So it's fine. It's fine. You's one trivia question per. So the draft slot will indicate where you get that. It's fine. You don't have to answer a trivia question. This makes sense. At the back of the draft.

Oh, I see. You just get your pick in line. Oh, so we won't run out. It could have been articulated. You just get your pick of a tight end at the back of the draft. I would love to just keep getting them wrong and never pick it. All right. Who's up next?

And then you could win the league pretty easily. Who's up next? Kate, sorry. Kate. Give me a quarter. Back it up. About 100. The band artist that plays in the background of the Yak video that TJ tweets out every Friday.

Oh, shoot. It's like a cool song. It's a... Oh. You don't know what song? Um, it's like a cool song. It's, um, oh. You don't know what song? Um, DJ Marshmallow. I don't know. I don't know.

Not quite. All right. You're in the back of the draft. That's okay. Crap. Okay. This is a lot of pressure because KB's going to care a lot about this so we're going to go running back

oh i wish i had i wish i was i was told these are very varying in difficulty some are very easy some are difficult i need we've only found the difficult one yeah this is a perfect kb question okay of the 10 tallest buildings in the world how many are in the united states you can call kb can i call kb jeff d low orchestrated this so we'd appreciate him more so you're gonna questions and we would say jeff's not so i knew a while ago my boy kb's gonna know this right off the rip no question oh my god i forgot i was doing a joke with Nick and I changed KB's contact to emergency help for guys who can't titty fuck. Oh no. And I haven't changed it back.

Che, yours is still Santana in my phone. Your call has... Oh, fuck. Okay, alright, guess. I'm going to guess... Of the ten tallest buildings in the world, many are the united states i'm gonna say three i think it's a good guess i think that's a great guess that's a great guess one wow we suck we america is lost embarrassing all right who's up next

jay all right here he is big guy He's pulling out his prep sheet right now. He's got his rankings. I will go column four, row one, running backs 100. I hope you get like long division or something. I'd love that. St. Louis Bread Company is referred to by what name in every city outside of St. Louis? This one's easy. Easy. Easy. Oh, my God Louis? This one's easy. Easy.

Easy. Oh, my God. Is it? So easy. Are you serious? I have no idea what this means. Is this Panera? God damn it.

Got it. I don't know. How many bread? Got it. Yeah, that's the only. All right, Jay, what's your pick? I'll take Christian McCaffrey. Ooh, sleeper.

Nice. Can't believe he lasted to his eighth pick. Those are the Chinese characters. One is to lick and the second one is pussy. Hell yes. Give me the next hundred for wide receivers receivers did i make a mistake

quarterback oh my word soda brand whose original slogan was it'll tickle your innards well i was thinking what soda brand tickles, I think. Let's run through that. I'm going to go Coca-Cola, even though I won't go Dr. Pepper, but I'm saying the southerness of Coca-Cola would say

tickle your innards. Coca-Cola. Dr. doing that. Mountain Dew. You're the QB guy, right? Alright, who's up next? You used to write speeches for QB, right? Let's go sass i will go uh qb for 100 like that sass i like that a lot for you

oh um michigan sports guy it's not like one of the biggest stadium yeah that's what it says it's a big house wait you didn't know what your question was no but like outside of the biggest stadiums? Yeah. Is that what it says? It's a big house. Wait, you didn't know what your question was? No, but like outside of college football, isn't that like the biggest stadium? It's a gigantic stadium. It's gigantic. Yeah. All right.

You get a quarterback. Oh. I'll go with who's taken. Just Patrick Mahomes. Patrick Mahomes. No one good is left, unfortunately. I'll go with Josh Allen. Nice. Oh, there's Josh Allen. Nice.

Oh, he's good. Good pick. You having fun, Sass? Sass, you have a good team. I was worried I was going to end up with Jalen Hurts. How devastating would that be? TJ? And then we'll rapid fire the people who got their questions wrong.

You should have to pick someone from the category. Wait. To end the round. Yeah. Okay. They don't get new questions. Universal blood type. Isn't there two?

Isn't there a universal donor and a universal receiver? You're asking the wrong crew. Yeah, dude. It's your question. O positive. O positive. O negative. You fucking idiot dumb ass in the back that's what you get for being an optimist bitch all right so titus you get your kicker uh we'll take justin tucker okay wow he's gonna have to see the list yeah yeah good i know And then who is after Titus? I'm going to take... Tight ends for Zah.

I'm going to take Darren Waller. Darren Waller for Zah. Jalen Hurts. Jalen Hurts for Kate. KD and Rudy. So I get to just pick running back? Yeah, running back. The questions don't matter.

So I just get the first pick of running back? The way that I had it constructed would have been different. Do we want to do it your way? It's too late. All right, let's restart. Yeah, let's restart. Wait, is there more to the left of the running backs? What was the way?

Oh, everyone picked the same category. Then you get a worse. Got it. Okay, I'll go. We'll go. All right, everyone picked the same category. Then you get a worse. Got it. Okay, I'll go. We'll go. All right, let's just do that. Do that from now on? Yeah, all right.

So let's do it. Well, not now. I chose wide receiver. Yeah, yeah. So I'll do a wide receiver. So let's all just go wide receiver. Yeah, yeah, okay. And then whoever got their trivia question wrong goes to back.

Yeah. All right, I'll take Jamar Chase. Wait, wait, wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait. What the fuck? No, we're all taking wide receiver. I get a running back, right? No the fuck no we're all taking my receiver i get a running back no no we're all no no he's not pick a running back no we're all taking wide receivers give me saquon barker before he talks you're right you're right that makes sense but

you're right then no you're right but not now and we just had no no but you guys tried to you were the head of it all right i'm getting a receiver right here yeah we're doing i want saquon and step on dick now i got saquon who's all right i'm next i'm getting a receiver right here. I want Saquon and Steph on digs now. Stop, stop. I got Saquon. Who is? All right. I'm next. I'm a wide receiver. Clear the board.

We should have. Clear the board. What do you mean clear the board? TJ, control Z. We're restarting. No, no, we're just doing wide receivers. Chase is right. What are you doing?

Yes. All right. This makes sense. Dick has who? I will take Justin Jefferson. I will take Jamar Chasear chase we're just picking now no no no just wide receivers just receivers and who what's your question got their question right my question right wait who yeah who got him right sass and che so che has the next pick

titus was the first to miss yeah tyree kill tyree kill now and then it, Sass, you have a pick wide receiver. Wide receiver, Stefan Diggs. Okay. Now, Jay, this is brilliant. This is a way better way to do it. No, but you're so smart. No, this punishes people for getting it wrong. We're doing snake. Just shut up. We're doing snake. Other way, the questions wouldn't matter. I didn't trust you. Yeah, because I apologize.

I want to apologize. No, he didn't articulate it well enough. Yeah, he got confused. Alright, now, who was the first one to get it wrong? Tight eyes. Zoom in on the receivers. Ooh, you have to have CD Lamb. Thank you. That sucks.

Oh, Garrett Wilson's a Buckeye. Let's go with him. Fair. Garrett Wilson. He's. I'm going to go CD Lamb. All right, then it was Kate. Take DJ.

DJ or AJ? I can't tell. It doesn't matter. So then it's me, right? AJ plays for the Eagles. That's me, right? Yeah. Okay, AJ Brown.

Yeah. Damn. Damn. And now we have good pull. Now who? Good pull for last pick. I'm on Russ St. Brown. Okay, and then TJ gets a Mari Cooper. pick. Amon Ross, St. Brown. Okay.

And then TJ gets Amari Cooper. Wow, this was genius, Chad. I apologize. I want to profusely apologize. I kind of like this. This is – I was stupid. But the snake thing is smart. We should do this one, Amon Ross. Snake is smart.

So then who did you get? Is that the draft? Are we done? No, that's right. That's the team. All right, so now we go. Guys, I'm going to say I think we've all got pretty stacked teams. Yeah.

Pretty good. All right, TJ. Yeah. Yeah. So I guess the category doesn't necessarily matter. Yeah, just pick the categories and we just do random trivias. Yeah. Yeah.

Like it doesn't. Just say which draft, which pick, which position you're picking. Quarterbacks. Quarterbacks. Okay. Taking a shot at the first quarterbacks. And the question doesn't just say which draft which pick your which position you're picking quarterback okay taking a shot at the first quarterbacks and the question doesn't matter doesn't matter if it's in the quarterback doesn't matter yeah it doesn't matter where the question is just say column row whatever vanderpump rules cast member tom sandoval cheated on girlfriend with ariana maddox with this girl incident known as scandival i don't know. All right. I don't know. TJ's in the back of the draft. Okay.

Good draft by TJ. All right. Raquel. Raquel. Just give me the next one on quarterback. Highest viewed yak case race. Ooh. Tough question.

It's such an easy one. No, I don't. Can you steal? Can you steal? No. I think four. Not even close. Do you want an answer?

Yeah, I don't know. Two, right? Yeah, two. Oh. Jay, Shane. I just realized by doing that I fucked myself out of Patrick Mahomes. Yeah, well. I mean, still.

I hurt myself. It doesn't matter at all? Yeah, you're right. It doesn't matter. That's a very good chance. You're right. Good call. None of this matters. Why are you getting all the sports questions?

Florida, right? No. No. That was a John Rich special. Sure. Sure. God. Pablo Escobar imported these exotic animals into his Colombian ranch in the 1980s. The animals were left abandoned after his death in 1993 and began to take over Colombia

as there were no natural predators to stop them at that time. What? I know that one. Castile? Exotic animals? Let's say a peacock? Nope. They took over the-

You think peacocks took over the fucking country? Peacocks. Dude, if you're- Predators? Peacocks are like- Oh, no. Apex predators? And they're a bird.

Everything eats birds. At the zoo that I used to go to, there were just peacocks roaming around there, terrorizing people. But that's not it. They didn't put them in cages. Yeah. They're so darn harmful. Steven just went to his resource of anecdotal knowledge.

These fucking peacocks are taking over the country. I did see a couple peacocks once. This is Pablo Escobar's America. Those were Pablo Escobar's peacocks in New Jersey. Has anyone got quarterback right yet? No. It was just going to be that order. Are we still doing quarterback?

Yak guest in America's Got Talent season 10 contestant. Is it me? It's Rudy. It's me? Okay. Yak guest in America's Got Talent season 10 contestant. Oh, fuck. I don't. And America's Got Talent Season 10 contestant. Oh, fuck. I don't know.

America's Got Talent. Oh, is this Oz the magician? Pearlman? Oz? Yeah, let's go Rudy. All right, Rudy's picks a quarterback. All right. Let's really dig deep in the draft board here.

Yeah, Mahomes fell. Yeah, give me Patrick Mahomes. That pick. You fucked yourself so hard Patrick Mahomes and AJ Brown I knew this was going to happen too because I specifically didn't read anything Stephen wrote knowing that I'd come here, fresh brain get very confused then

eventually find his way I finally saw your vision thank you anyone is fine Barstool Sports Blogger who was sent to Latvia Yeah. I finally saw your vision. Thank you. Anyone is fine. Barstool Sports Blogger who was sent to Latvia his first week on the job. Latvia his first week on the job. I want to say Donnie.

Fuck. Latvia soccer rugby. I'm going to say Donnie. I know that's wrong. It's Clem. Clem. Clem. And Hank tells a story that he had just met Clem because he had just gotten hired. They flew to Latvia.

And the first night Hank texted me and was like, Clem screams in his sleep. They were staying at a hostel. And he said, Hank, what did Clem do in his sleep in Latvia? You just met him, right? Yeah, I just met him. We were staying in like two twin beds. In the middle of the night, he just started screaming. All night, screaming bloody murder.

I wanted to leave. I didn't know whether to wake him up or because I thought he might kill me. He was just like, ah! That's awesome. Okay, yeah, so that was Clem. So Kate's in the back. Who's up? Zah.

Jesus Christ. These are impossible. I don't even know that one. It's tough, but I think I know it. 1980 Olympic semifinals. Henry Lonkovich. Is it Trediak? Wow. Good job, bro.

Bang. I'd like to give Zaj quarterback since I knew it. Nope. Who's next? Ty, I'm up. Go ahead. Yeah. Fill in the blanks.

You got it. You got it. You got it. Speed demons. Speed demons. You got it. You got it. You got it. Speed Demon. Speed Demon. You got it. You got it. You got it.

What? You got it. You got it. You got it. I thought it was Speed Demon. I don't know. Speed Demon. Yes don't know. Speed Demon. Yes.

Oh, yes. Speed Demon. Speed Demon. Oh, yes. Yes. Did you play that video? Oh, yes. You got it.

You got it. You got it. Speed Demon. Speed Demon. All right. Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, Jimmy Anderson, members of What Exclusive People. Exclusive. 27? Yeah. All right. Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, and Jimi Hendrix are members of what exclusive? Exclusive? 27?

Yeah. All right. That's a fun one. I got in. All right. I will take Lamar Jackson. No, Josh Allen. Josh Allen.

I got to go with my guy. Oh, Justin Fields on there, tooar Jackson. No, Josh Allen. Josh Allen. I gotta go with my guy. Oh, Justin Fields on there, too. Yeah. Uh. Justin Fields, not your guy. Justin Fields. Final answer. Josh Allen's already on the board.

Just, no, we've already cleared the board once, Brando. Justin Fields. Steno. Yeah, should we go back to the original way we were doing it? Yeah, I kind of like that better. This at least has rhyme and reason. Okay, who's up next? Me.

I really want Justin Tucker back. Was I supposed to go yet? Olympian who allegedly lied about being held up at gunpoint at a gas station during 2016 games in Rio. You missed a question, didn't you? Oh, I don't know this at all. Oh, I remember this one. Wait, did he skip Sass? Did you guys Oh, I don't know this at all. I remember this one. He skipped Sass. Did you guys skip me?

You missed your question. When? The one right after me. You missed Urban Meyer. Oh, yes. Yes, yes, yes. The Olympian who was held up was Ryan Lochte. Yeah.

Whoa, no way. Yeah. Yeah. I had no clue. Whoa. All right. You actually turned into Ryan Lochte right there. What?

Give me. Give me. Lochte. Josh Allen. Lochte's all time, bro. Probably should have. Oh, yeah. Yeah, good luck.

Yeah, he's my guy. It's a guy draft. Might have been a reach. So then it snakes back and it's me again, right? Yeah. We all got to go. We got the trivia questions wrong first. The people got it wrong.

We all got to go. Hurts. DJ takes Hurts. I will do Josh Allen. It's already taken? Nick. Nick. I don't want Joe Burrow.

I fucking hate Joe Burrow. Take Lamar. I guess I'll do Joe Burrow. I fucking hate Joe Burrow. Take Lamar. I guess I'll do Joe Burrow. He's still good. And that's character development. I don't like him. What do you not like about Joe Burrow? I hate him.

Give me... I hate that LSU video. Give me Justin Herbert. Bad pick. You picked Justin Fields. Look at Lamar dropping. I got the better Justin. Oh, no. pick you pick justin field look at lamar dropping i got the better justin oh no i am gonna pull a little bit of surprise i'm gonna go trevor lawrence whoa what holy

he sucks lamar tends to get injured wow that's um i'll go with Lamar Jackson. Yes. Sounds like a football name. Good pick. Yeah. I'm going to go with Tua. Ugh. No, I'm actually tuned on, so that's a great pick, but he might get injured. So, Rowan, you just turned into a big Jets fan, it looks like.

Yeah. Yeah. All right. Roger. So, Nick, you're back up. I'm going with the Bills-Jets. Give me a question. What are you doing?

Running back? Running back. Running backs. Running backs. Running backs. Good pick. NBC sitcom. That's a good show. Very good show.

The tits on the. Yes. Oh. Yeah. He's a star of an NBC sitcom, 95 to 99. Man, I don't have a clue. The Middle. News Radio.

News Radio, Phil Hartman. Yeah. I was going to say Fear Factor. I guess that's not a sitcom. No. All right, next in the back. But I'm the front of the back, right? Front of the back.

Hell yeah. All right. Best selling breed of dog in the world according to the American Cattle Club. It's one of two, right? No, it's one of many. No, but there's two. Labrador Retriever. There's only two dog breeds.

Change my mind. French Bulldog. I would not have guessed that. I was thinking Golden. Damn. I wonder if it's because they have a higher price point. Go ahead, TJ. Jerry does have four.

Steven's right. Anecdotally, Jerry has a lot. Oh, my God. Titus, you can't do the, oh, I didn't work at Barstool yet. This is Barstool. Yeah, it's true. You were in this contest. You were in this contest.

We all know this, too. Come on, Barstool boy. That's not it. I was. Think of names of your coworkers. Can I just say. Hold on. This could say name three.

I was going to say, can I name three people that work here? And name three of the six winners of this year's Barstool Bracket Buskers? I mean, Donnie just got married in Ireland, so I'm going to assume that that was part of it. He won his wedding on this. Yeah, no, it was a busker. I'm going to walk back to Donnie Pick. I'm going to read the room and say that was not correct. Kelly Keegs feels like she would win something like this.

Let's go with... I don't know any of these. I don't know. That was forever. I don't care. I don't remember anybody going to Ireland. It was a weird group. Oh.

Yeah. Oh, the gang. Oh, my God. What? That's crazy. Okay. Those are my next guesses for sure. Nightmare blunt rotation.

Okay. Nightmare blunt rotation. All right. Titus is in the back. Jesus. Huh. Is this a riddle? You all really need to go.

Brain teaser. Jesus? Nope. Is that a backholic? Not a backholic. That's actually... Oh my god, dude. That's actually true, though.

Killed himself, shot himself. I would count that. No, he was crucified. That may be one of my favorite clips ever. He was sent knowing he was going to die be one of my favorite clips ever he was said knowing he was going to die yeah he could have shot out steve mahalik we should have him on the show sometime he could have stopped it and he's dead shot himself he's dead killed himself shot himself this mcdonald's character was originally introduced as a four-armed milkshake

stealing villain a four-armed um that's pretty easy yep Yep. Come on. That one's easy. What's his name? The McBurglar. Don't say that. The Mc... Oh, my God. He's the Hamburglar. The Hamburglar. It's Grimace. Grimace Shakes.

Grimace has four arms? No, they got rid of two. He's the first in a line. I like the McBurglar, though. McBurglar. Me? This musical artist has the following three albums available on Apple Music and Spotify. Winds of Bowling Green, Cancer Survivor, Four Peas of Marketing.

What in the hell is this? What the fuck? We listened to it on the show. Real music heads would get this. Yep. Winds of Bowling Green. So there's John Rich. Okay.

I have no fucking idea. John Rich for this question. Cancer Survivor the album four p's of marketing sounds awesome um better than the alternative I uh Gary Vee I thought you might his dad his dad yeah oh my god holy shit got to check those out. Okay. Next one. The color of the peanut M&M caught by Joe Montana.

Oh, this is so easy. That's got to be a win. I have a shirt. This is so easy. Easy. I think it's yellow. Definitely. It's 100% yellow.

Nice. Good answer, Che. All right. Who's your pick? What category is this? Running back? I'm having fun, Che. Thanks. Is he the first one to. All right, who's your pick? What category is this? Running back? I'm having fun, Che. Thanks.

Is he the first one to get this? Is this the running back? Oh, my God. Christian McCaffrey. Great pick. Thank you. All right, just give me a question. I will try to answer it.

Come on, Brandon. Oh. Oh. Oh! That was before me, wasn't it? Uh, you were on Sirius as well.

Who called in? Oh. He was pretty good. Was it real handicapper or somebody that we called a handicapper?

Hey, you have to guess. I'm not giving you any more clues. There clues another word for that um i don't know okay who is it i got you with that he it's linda linda was a bulldogs week. She just made racially charged jokes. No, no, no. She had some opinions. But they...

Listen, everyone... Damn, you're right. I love Linda. That was one of those sexist things where I just... Yeah, no, I said... You're like, there can't be a woman picking games. I could not consider it with a woman. Brandon actually has never acknowledged Megan making money.

He just walks right by her. Yeah. Okay. Who's... Shout out Linda, the best. and making money. He just walks right by her. Yeah. Okay. Who's... Sass. Shout out Linda. The best. Ooh.

Name of the company who had Smiling Bob as their mascot. Oh, fuck. Oh, fucking D. I have no idea. Oh, that's confusing. Looks super familiar, though. I don't know.

Give up. Insights. Oh. Not familiar at all? No, I never would have gotten that. Give up. Insights. Not familiar at all. No, I never would have gotten that. All right, this is the last one. TJ, this person accused Nick Tarani of looking like Portland. Big shout out, little bro.

All right, who's your pick? He called me a sex slave, too. Yeah, wow. Mm-hmm. I couldn't tell. Give me Bijan. Yeah. Okay. too yeah Wow mm-hmm I couldn't tell give me B John yeah hey fuck yeah and then Nick can I see a lot of guys left on the board yeah it's tough for under trivia give me Nick Chubb ah that's who i wanted you fucking bastard yoink now i have to figure out my whole draft strategy god damn it i'll take saquon um we'll do derrick henry fuck

myself i'm gonna do naji harris for za Derrick Henry. Fuck. Najee Harris for Zah. Bad pick, Zah. Do a little Travis action. Travis action? We'll do Tony Pollard. Good pick.

I can't believe Eckler hasn't been picked. I'll take Austin Eckler. Good pick. I can't believe Eckler hasn't been picked. I'll take Austin Eckler. Good pick, Brandon. Great pick, Brandon. There's only one left. All right, round three. We've gotten halfway through. Issues with Josh Javits now, too.

Sassy, you loving fantasy so far? Yeah. Tight ends. Tight ends. All right, here we go, TJ. Tight ends. Are we going to run out of trivia or is there more trivia? No, we've done it right.

World's leading producer of Tungsten. Is it China? China. It's China. Wait, are you in the Tungsten group? Yeah, that's bullshit. That's bullshit. That's bullshit.

You're part of the Greater New York Federation. You should have tried to join the group. Oh, wait, you did and they didn't vote you in. Oh, is that true? No, you're one of the ones that didn't vote me in. I was in India. Oh, that's true. As is his right.

It had to be unanimous. As is his right. There was one person. You're in the shit, Greer? That said nay. Okay. Greer's in. I voted for you.

So, is Travis Kelsey hurt, or was that a lie? You're lying. I voted for you. Huh? Nobody voted for me. That's right. I didn't. He'll be okay.

He's out for the year, I think. I'm going to go with Teach. He might miss week one. TJ Hawkinson. I feel like you have to. Yeah, the rule is you have to have a player on your team that has your name. Yeah. You have to get Andrews.

I already have Nick Chubb. All right. Kyle Pitts. Rudy can. Bass's real name is Saquon. Fuck, I forget. What's real name is Saquon. Fuck, I forget. What? How do you forget?

It was on the text group this weekend. Like Fresno? Yeah, got it. Fresno. And that's fact. Is that from the movie or that was just from our text? No, that's from the act. It actually is. I guess I'll go with...

So are people not doing Travis Kelsey, or is that like a? Do Travis Kelsey. He's going to be out for a while. One week, maybe. All right, then I guess I'll go Travis Kelsey. Yeah, great pick. Good pick. Good pick, Sass.

Great pick, Sass. You know your ball. Yeah. Yep. Oh, wow. Easy one. No, it isn't. Are you going to go over?

I am. How can you not get this? You're the trivia guy. This is an easy one. Oh, Daniac ranking? So easy. Yeah, this is an easy one. I don't know.

Who doesn't know? Oh, I do. No. That's his answer, Dave Portnoy. Cheapy. Was Cody Lanz ever number one? I do. No. That's his answer, Dave Portnoy. Cheapie. Was Cody Lanza ever number one? I have no idea. Why would I?

Why? That was number one a lot. That was obvious to you? You're the trivia boy. I do not know that answer. I thought it was Cody Lanza. The next one. Or the woman with freckles on her vagina.

Oh, yeah. Freckle pussy. Freckle pussy. The author. Oh, yeah. Freckle pussy. Freckle pussy. The author of best-selling book, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. Lisa Ann? I don't know any authors. Lisa Ann.

Sexually. What a weird book. That book is ridiculous. You're Lisa Ann. You're just like Lisa Ann. That book is ridiculous. You're Lisa Ann. You're just like, Lisa Ann, that's all I know. That's the only author. That's the only way. You have to finish an audio book of that on your drive, too. I respect the hell of just throwing Lisa Ann in there.

That's fucking awesome. Promoting a book, I know that. Steven's answers are just what happened in his life. And she's known for acting like a lady. Oh, yeah. Is this me? Yeah. This person's brother was the face of MTV's 2012 election coverage, asking questions,

Barack Obama and Mitt Romney. Isn't this Jenks' brother? Yup. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. All right. So what are we in?

Tight ends. Tight ends? Oh. Well, do we... Is that true? Do we have to pick a name of someone on our team? No. Okay. Alright, so what are we in? Tight ends. Tight ends? Oh. Well, do we... Is that true? Do we have to pick a name somewhere on our team? No. Okay.

Give me Kittle. Give me Kittle. Who are you going to pick, Rudy? Is there Rudolphs on there? No, Kyle. I would have gone Kyle. Kyle Rudolph, who just retired. Kyle Rudolph.

He retired yesterday. Kyle Pitts. Well, it's okay. Kittle's... I fuck with Kittle. Okay. Okay. Any square will do. Kittle's going. I fuck with Kittle. Okay. Okay. Any square will do.

Kittle's going to have a breakout year. Going back to 2001, this color of Gatorade has been used more times than any other color in the Super Bowl winning Gatorade basket. Wow. That's so easy. I don't have a clue. So easy. So easy.

It sure is. I want to say yellow. If I'm wrong, I'm a big dumb dumb. So easy. Oh, so easy. What? Yellow? Orange.

I had no idea. She said yellow. I thought it was yellow. Yellow's better than orange. Yellow had no idea. She said yellow. I thought it was clear. Yellow. Yellow's better than orange. I thought it was just water. Dum-dum. Did I ever tell you guys one of my impressions is from... Remember that old Gatorade commercial?

Who's question? Wait, what? That old Gatorade... Jay's about to say something awesome. All right, go ahead. Remember that old Gatorade commercial where it was like the old guys talking about how Gatorade started? One of my impressions is from that commercial.

Can you give it to us? You have an impression of a commercial. Of the guy in the commercial. This is just one of his impressions. Implying that there's a handful of others. So a commercial none of us remember, you have an impression of the guy. You will remember it once I say it. Use any voice right here.

Okay, I'm going to close my eyes. So it's old guys taking you back to the 80s or something like that. And they're talking about how they invented Gatorade and how they named it. Yep. I haven't done this in 15 years. Why did you do it 15 years? Naturally, we called our stuff Gatorade. That was Forrest Gump.

That was Forrest Gump, Jay. No, that's the crocodile one or a little bit. Forrest Gump. No, I know the commercial he's talking about. The? I remember it now. Everybody has a Christopher Walken that. That was like a time machine.

Say it again? One more time. Yeah, one more time. Naturally, we called our stuff Gatorade. That's Forrest Gump. We've got to stop and watch this commercial. Was that hot on the playground? Was that?

This wasn't that. I think I was probably in late high school. Can you do the rest of the draft like that? Late high school. Do the rest of the draft in that. I don't have the full. There's nothing to the voice aside the Gatorade saying it in a different way right somebody at home is watching it's old shots of florida football practice right yes yes guys in white lab coats yes yeah yeah see i told

you once i did it you guys are the good job shay thank you you have the weirdest best brain of all time. Wait, TJ, you want me to find it? I got it. Okay. Only Che. Only Che. Born in 1965 in the storage swamp of Florida. And as befits a legend, it began with a searing question.

Coach asked why we didn't go during a game. The players weren't adequately hydrated and their performance suffered as the god he nailed the impression oh no i remember yes they drank a carbohydrate electrolyte beverage created by university of florida doctors naturally we called our stuff gatorade now we gotta hear it again it again. Hear it again. Yeah. Do it again.

Yeah. Go again. Naturally, we called ourself guide ride. Yeah. Pretty good. Pretty damn good. Don't you have another impression? That's one of your Godzilla.

Yeah. What was the Godzilla one? That one is, or I have a few. The alien from Independence Day. Yeah? The alien never speaks. Yeah, through the guy. Through the scientist.

What does he say? Okay, I need to hear that. Did I do that on this before? No. Okay. Jeez. When he's like, release me? Yes, yes, yes.

So it's a scene where the president is in whatever, 51 and the scientist is in there with the alien and the alien puts his tentacles on the guy and he's pressed up against the glass. And so it's a whole scene. All right. So the president is talking to the alien or no, the alien. The alien emerges. All right. to the alien or no daily alien emerges all right that's pretty good how did you know you can finish guys well no it's a whole scene okay keep going okay sorry President speaking What do you want? Release Me

Can there be a peace between us? Peace No Peace I feel like I'm watching the movie No, no, no, there's one more So what do you want us to do? Die

Oh yeah, oh yes What would you want us to do? Die. Oh, yeah. Oh, yes. What would you like us to do? Die. Woo! Oh, yes, Jay. Oh. Sassy, what are your thoughts on that? It's really good.

Yeah. Really, really good. Oh, I love you, Jay. All right. Where are we? Yeah, I think it is me. Barstool employee who live on the yak admitted to butt-chucking beers. Dana?

Yeah. Danal beers. That guy's getting married. Congrats to Dana, by the way. Congrats to Dana. Yeah, you got engaged. Nice. He finally reserved some time to talk to his future father-in-law.

He set a date. He went to the kitchen. He called him. Walked into the living room. I'm going to go. I'm going to get engaged to your daughter. He yelled to him from outside of the bathroom. I'm going to go Darren Waller.

That's the guy you wanted? Got your guy. I had him first. I think that's the first hard knocks I watched. They call it Gatorade. When he was Raven or Raiders in 2003. So up next. Non-barstool, non-barstool.

NFL writer Peter King famously tried to make a restaurant host cry by telling him that this actor killed himself. It was Robin Williams in Milwaukee. Yes. Oh. Milwaukee. Robin Williams, tweet, Milwaukee. Asked restaurant host, God, did you hear about Robin Williams?

Host, no. Me, died. He killed himself. Thought he would cry. Legendary. Unbelievable tweet. Who are my choices? All pretty good ones. Let's go with Kyle Pitts.

He's good, right? Yeah. Oh, shit, shit. What? He's not good? No, he's fine. Everyone knows he's pretty good. Okay. Okay. Miss it so I can get... Donald Trump's exact self-reported height and weight when he was booked in jail. All right, he's 215.

6'2", 215. Yikes. Oh! God damn it. 6-2, 2-15. Yikes. 6-3. God damn it. God damn it. Yikes. Yikes. Dumb.

Bad. Brutal. Brutal. Sure, give me any. Fuck. Oh, so this has a Mandela effect, though. So a lot of people say Berenstein, Berenstein. B-A-R-E-N-S-T-E-E-N.

B-E-A-R-S. No, it's not E-E-N. That's it. Oh, back in line. Oh, wow. Yikes. God doesn't even know how to spell Berenstein. I still don't understand how that happens.

Yeah. It is Berenstein Bears. Yeah. I'm just picking a tight end now yes no no no question um give me mark andrews yeah nice pick thank you uh let's go with Dallas Goddard. Great pick. Okay. Cole Kmet. Damn it. It sounded like you were doing an accident.

I'll do Evan Ingram. Gladly take Kincaid. He's going to be good. Don't. Yeah, yeah. Kickers. Now it gets real. We're going for kickers.

I hate my team. This is where the men separated from the other people. Well, 50-plus yard field goals were worth 30 points. Oh. When did that happen? All right, here we go, Nick. Taylor Swift names this famous ex-boyfriend of hers dumped her in a 27-second phone call. She has a lot.

She has a lot. But this is a no-brainer. Mayer? John Mayer? Don't look at me. I'm not giving you a hint. Joe Thomas. I honestly had that totallybrainer. Mayor? John Mayer? Don't look at me. I'm not giving you a hint. Joe Thomas! I honestly had that totally wrong.

She date John Mayer? Yes. I thought that was Gyllenhaal. Yeah. Early. Really? Did he just get divorced? Yeah.

In 1891, this company launched a marketing campaign that lasted until 1992 that bought advertising space on the sides of barns across the country. Fuck. 101 year mark. That's a long campaign. Fuck. I think I know this. What is it?

I think I know it too. The Confederate States of America. I'm not going to tell you. Brandon. Brandon, you need to write speeches for them. What is it? I don't know. What is it?

Ask her what she thinks. What is it? I think she's wrong. Okay. I thought it had to do with pet food. Or like animal food. Quaker Oats. Oh, no.

It was way off. Tobacco. I thought it was Coke and Pouch. I was so close. I was so close. Yep. Damn it. Dr. Richard Sackler and this company manufactured and sold Oxycontin

They are widely blamed for the opioid Opioid Is this a question? Fun question John Rich I'm going through some things Yeah I'm confused What's the question? What am I doing?

It's the name of the company This is just John Rich's interest The pharmaceutical company Ah I know it And this company manufactured and sold Oxycontin Really fun question. You're widely blamed for the opium... Hundreds of thousands of people died.

I'd say maybe even millions. Maybe millions. I don't know. Pfizer. Purdue. Damn. Assassinate that shit. Why'd you rip that one like that?

No problem. Because I knew it. I just watched a show about it. Who's up? I'm up next. The city is wildly considered the Amish capital of America. It's gotta be in Pennsylvania, right?

Uh, shit. Scranton? Oh, come on! It's Lancaster! The dude! He doesn't live near any Amish people. Yeah, the electric city. It's the opposite of Amish. the electric city. He doesn't live near any Amish people. Yeah, the electric city. He's the opposite of Amish.

The electric city. Who's up? That's fine. On an episode of The Act, Ben Mintz told a poker story that involved him exchanging phone numbers with this celebrity. Oh, fuck. They're at the same table. Shit, I forget who that is. Oh, my God. They were at the same table I forget who that is oh my god they were at the same table someone like super famous

yeah it's almost like it was a lie yeah oh this is I know who it is and it's I don't want to take up too much time focus right cuz we called they died right and then we know oh no We would know if they died. Yeah. Nancy would be parading that through the streets. I guess now I can finally put out his phone number. Yeah. Oh, the whole reason.

I'm going to get this from Ben Spiller, but I know this. Ray Liotta? No, he died. Oh, wait. It was a different story. What's the Ray Liotta story? He called him a funny guy at the poker table. Oh, that's right. He had multiple poker.

That was my favorite Ray Liotta story when he died. Ray Liotta is who I was thinking of. Yeah, yeah. Are we 0 for right now? Yeah, I think so. Where are we at? Let's go. Disgraced alma mater of sports business journalist Darren Revell.

Oh, fuck. I erase him from my existence. I don't want to even know anything about him. Disgraced alma mater of sports business journalist Darren Revell. Oh, fuck. I erase him from my existence. I don't want to even know anything about him. Disgraced alma mater of sports business journalist Darren Revell. Fordham. Oh. That's a good guess. Northwestern.

TJ went like this. Rutgers beat Northwestern. Oh, yeah. Somebody just tweeted me, do you want to swap? I have Josh Allen and Kincaid, and you can give me Burrow and Kelsey, and you can have every single Buffalo Bill. Hell no.

All right. Not doing trades this early in the season. Okay. Okay. The home state of eight presidents, more than any other state. Damn it. Geography and history, my two worst worst categories i think common sense is up yeah

um jesus yeah that's by far peacocks in new jersey that was nuts peacocks was the craziest thing uh that's gonna be wrong. New York? It's either Virginia or Ohio, right? Ohio has astronauts. Ohio has astronauts. That is Doc Ellis, Pittsburgh Pirate pitcher who claims to pitch to no hitter on LSD. That is Doc Ellis. Don't take Justin Tucker.

TJ wants him. You hated the people that docked at Ellis. TJ, come on. He's your producer. Just be nice to him. I'm going to go ahead and take Justin Tucker. Oh, boo. TJ, for the record, I would have let you have Duncan.

I would have also let you have Tucker. TJ, guess what? I can trade him to you later because if you missed the question, you wouldn't get him anyway. But he's going to hit the question. I'm taking care of him. Who's the question? I would have gone first in the snake. No,'t have you wouldn't have you wouldn't have you still

don't last snake oh tj you were round five and you still don't get it tj i got you it's pretty fucking simple jesus broadway play that features characters named mr mistophilus and old Deuteronomy. That's right. Gay. Wow. Gay. Gay sass. I can't read it. Oh, that's cats. Oh, that's fabulous. Who is the good ones here? Butker, please.

You just got to go good offense. They're all good. All right, let's go Butker. Oh, you could have done a bill. You could have done a bill. Who was the bill? Tyler Bass. All right, Tyler Bass. All right, let's go Butker. Oh, you could have done a Bill. You could have done a Bill. Who was the Bill? Tyler Bass. All right, Tyler Bass.

All right, take Tyler Bass. Okay, Nick. Or no, TJ, you're up. Last question. Nope. That's what he plays Kirk last year. All right, Nick. I'll take Harrison Butker.

Oh, that's such a steal. Yeah, I know. Can't believe you didn't go at two. Who should I take, Steven? They're all pretty similar. Daniel Carlson's the next in line, but he plays with a bad offense, but he might bang some fucking pluses. Come on.

Fucking pick a pick. Who's Jake Elliott's on the Eagles? Eagles. I'll take Jake Elliott. What? Aren't you? What? Nothing.

No, no, no. That was my pick. Big cat. Jake Elliott. What? Aren't you? What? Nothing. No, no, no. That was my pick. My pick? Let's go with Brandon McManus. This is essentially a fantasy draft of who gets injured. Yeah. You get two? No, I'm just saying whoever gets injured is going to lose.

And whoever gets pedophilia. Young Ho Koo, pleaseoo please damn it I wanted that no you can have one pedophile but if you had to pick a team that has two pedophiles who do you think it is give me zero line I'll take Daniel Carlson I mean the odds are there is a pedophile

somebody's got one no you can drop him No you can drop them TJ You can drop them Hey TJ you want to try kickers Wait are we playing head to head every week or no Yes Oh we are it's not just rotisserie

Total points No we're playing head to head I think that makes more sense No head to head works Why wouldn't head to head work Yeah is it right? Did you register? I think that makes more sense. No, head-to-head works. Why wouldn't head-to-head work? Well, I mean, okay. Yeah, no, it has to be head-to-head because there's a playoff. There's like a loser's bracket that will.

Okay. I just assumed it was total points. Yeah, I'll make sure everyone signed up for it by Thursday. All right, and then what else? Steel wheel? Oh, yeah, steel wheel. Do we all have the option to do that? This was your idea.

Okay, what's the idea? No, but Nick perfected it. What's the idea, Nick? I don't know. It's a wheel if you want a player. But I thought you had to do it during the draft. Well, it's too late now, then. Because there's nothing to draft. There's nothing to fall back on.

Well, no, it's a swap. It's still a swap. Yeah, we could swap. We could swap. Okay. So let's say I want... What if we just did a wheel and pick two names, and those people have to trade their third-round picks?

No, not even third-round. They trade position. Trade quarterbacks. Yeah. But Wett is also on the wheel. Okay. So it's everyone's name, and the two people who get it – Yeah, go to –

Have to swap their whole teams? Nope. Yeah, fuck it. Yeah, why not? Yeah, let's do that. Yeah, fuck it. All right. So we choose the two people that are swapping, and then there's a wheel of all the positions,

or one says full team. Okay. Or one says wet. I like that. I like that. All right. I like that. It's like there's a chance.

There's a wife on there, too. Yeah, and wet's on there as well, so if you get teamed up with wet, you get wet. Wet's on the name wheel. Yeah. Okay. Give me a couple minutes. Okay wet. Wet's on the name wheel. Yeah. Okay. Give me a couple minutes. Okay. You want to spin the regular wheel? We haven't spun the regular wheel? No, I don't think so. It's good to be back.

Two and a half hour show. Can you stop kicking me? I'm not sitting here the rest of the week. Why not? I like you next to me. I know, but... I want you to be next to me. We have too much room. We don't have enough room. Buy a gun. Good-looking wheel.

Oh, dear. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Fun. Do people want to win by a gun? Kind of. Not really. A little bit.

Big time. Yeah. Okay, so these are two people who are going to swap potentially full teams. This is exciting. Yeah, I want that. That'd be sick. Mm-hmm. What can I want to do?

Oh. Why do you keep calling me out? You got Amin Ra. He wants Amin Ra. Okay. oh why do you keep calling me out you got i'm in wrong he wants i'm on raw okay what does it mean what is it god of death right chosen one sun god oh okay i'll trade receivers with you but you gotta trade quarterbacks with me i don't know who you have so i don't even know why i said that i have no idea all right oh justin herbert i got justin herbert spin this till it's complete I don't know who you have, so I don't even know why I said that. Who do you have?

I have no idea. All right. Oh, Justin Herbert. I got Justin Herbert. We should spin this until it's complete. What do you got? What do you mean? So everyone has to just swap something. I don't know.

All right, go ahead. I'm saying we should spin it until there's nothing left. So everybody has to trade something? Yeah. So TJ's trading something. Okay. TJ? What will TJ be trading?

Who will he be doing it with? We should do this twice. Yeah. I was saying we should do it until it's. Until it's one of our names. Oh. Oh. Yes.

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Yes! Yes! Yes! That ruled Damn Yeah this whole thing was Yeah That was a lot of fun That scratched that fantasy itch for you Yeah

Big time Alright Brandon So I'm trading Yeah I'm gonna be trading with Steven Fett Hey Gouge him Steven Shagg. Yay.

Gouge him. So now we figure out what we trade. Can you turn the board up for a moment? Well, we don't need the board. Okay. So who do you want to trade? It's just positions. It's a full team, and then it's all five positions.

Yeah. What position do you want to trade? What's your weakest position? Tight end's not great. Who's your tight end? Mark Andrews. Yeah, I would like that. Handsome son of a bitch.

He is handsome. Good looking guy. All right. I kind of want whole team though to be honest you're a pretty good team so oh i don't want that i have eckler who you got christian mccaffrey bang let's go all right all right well you got that he's not that bad yeah, that's a great... Leave it as an option. No, I think...

Oh, okay, yeah, you're right. Every team's different, yeah. Yeah. But, yeah, so I got Eckler. He's got... Yep. I can live with that. Nice.

That was a big come-up for you right there. Yeah, I think my team just got really good. They're pretty similarly ranked. Probably. PPR. really good they're pretty similarly ranked probably ppr all right all right who we're trading now oh so i'm off the wheel and you're off the wheel we're done yeah you're done za me Zaha is trading with me

alright Zaha what are you hoping to trade Zaha oh I'm not trying to get rid of Justin Fields you are too and I'm so just swap whole team. Swap whole team. All right, go ahead. Whole team is what we want to see.

Tight ends. Who's your tight end? Darren Waller. Oh, nice. Do you have big cats? You have Evan Ingram now. Okay, that's pretty fine. That's pretty much it.

Yeah. Equal trade. Of course, I just wanted Darren Waller. Why? That's all he wanted. That's all he wanted was Darren Waller. That's his first. So his season was the first, like, hard knocks I watched.

Oh, fuck. On the Raiders, I believe. Well, them's the breaks. Can I just. If I could, I would give them back to you. That's all right. But I can't. Can I point something out?

What? There's five. Yeah, whoever is last loses. Okay. The whole thing. That's the end of the fantasy league. That would be great. We just did that.

Oh, Nikki. Okay. Nick and who? Kate. All right. I really like my team. He really likes his team. There it is.

Yes. See ya. This is the best game of the year. You took DJ Moore pretty early. Yeah, I have. Oh, no. I have Josh. Oh, my God.

You had a stacked team, Nick. Your team was awesome. Oh, no. Nick, your team was so good. Oh, now it's Kate's team. That's fantasy football for you. A classic rule that, now it's Kate's team. That's fantasy football for you. A classic rule that we all know. Kate's team.

Oh, there we go. Oh, Kate, this team sucks. Oh, my God. Kate, you're really good at drafting fantasy football. This is my long-term plan. Yeah, Nick, you had a really good team. You had a really good team. When. Yeah, Nick, you had a really good team. You had a really good team. Now that I look at it, you had a really good team.

Now Lamar's going to get hurt. Good first pick, too, in the draft. That's why you had a good team. Nick, you want my team? How about it? This is so easy. Brutal, Nick. I'm a Steelers fan.

It's like, quietly root for Lamar. Yeah. I'll trade you my whole team for wet and your whole team. What's your team? Jalen Hurts? Oh, that's a good trade. Oh, that's a good trade. Great trade. Great trade.

You have to get wet, though. Wet for this. Take the wet. Now, wet now and bust or bust to Vegas. No, I'm sticking with my team. All right. I like it. TJ, your team's not very good either.

I know. Okay. Oh, boy. Oh, no. I still think we should do rotisserie. I don't think we should do head-to-head. Who cares? The way it's. I, boy. Oh, no. I still think we should do rotisserie. I don't think we should do head-to-head. Who cares? The way it's...

I was just... Damn. Such a good job. Damn, damn. I kind of want that head-to-head neck and cake. I might throw a fit. You're right. You're right.

Grudge match. You're right. You're right. KB and Rudy. Let's go. Stop. Why are you doing this? That smells pretty good.

It smells really good. What flavor is that? Oh, I don't know. Minty fresh. Sass. All right, so Roan and Titus are safe. I thought they weren't safe. Oh, yeah, they lose.

For the record, if Roan does lose, if he wants me to, I will. That's a big move. I will also do the punishment. Only if he wants me to. I don't want to intrude on if he has his own setup. But, Roan, just so you know, I'm in it with you. I will not return that favor to KB. Let's go.

Fight ends. Damn it, dude. I actually did. Wait, who'd you have? That was Kelsey. Oh, fuck yeah. Okay. Who'd you have?

I had Kittle. Oh, that's fine. I was looking to offload him. Probably the only Nick lost. Yeah, Nick was the biggest loser. I lost Josh Allen, Nick Chubb, and Justin Jefferson. You had maybe the three best. Yeah, like those three guys could have been the best.

That's probably going to win the league, like the team you had. Yeah, Kate's going to win. Yeah, Kate will win the league. Great, yeah. Wow. Okay, TJ,j go get wet and we'll finish the show there's a sink in the back too i piss in it though it's whirly yeah i do is there a hose yeah i know you're refilling your water no it's a it's a shop sink can i tell you something else yeah My son pissed in it yesterday too. Wow. Parked here for the Cubs game and then I was like, hey, he's like, I gotta

go to the bathroom. I was like, I got a sink for you, buddy. Teach him young. Yeah. Oh, this is fun. This is a little treat. It's a delight, Kate. This is a treat. What a little treat this was. What's tomorrow, Dad?

We're doing another treat tomorrow. Wait, tomorrow, Dad. We're going to do another draft tomorrow. Wait, is tomorrow Data Day? Or should it be Thursday? I'm not here Thursday. Oh, shit. Also, I don't have to be here. Do you want to be here for Data Day? It doesn't matter to me at all.

I kind of want to just yak with you, Sass. Yeah, fine. All right, so we'll do Data Day Thursday. Okay. Because Data Day does get frustrating. It's very Stephen Chay-centric, so let's not burn a sass show on that. Well, this show was kind of Stephen Chay-centric, too. Yeah, but in a good way.

It was incredible. Wait, what does the winner get? A thousand bucks. A thousand bucks and their flight's first class to the Super Bowl. Oh, hell yeah. Oh, so Kay having a good team is, like, good, then. Yeah. It's great.

That's good for you. Yeah, that is good. That's bad for Nick. Having a bad team is bad. Well, you just won't be here. Now, if KB does Yeah, that's good. That's bad for Nick. Having a bad team is bad. Well, you just won't be here. Now, if KB does win, I will be expecting to ride with him. I will volunteer. Yeah, you're going to need to film it for Anus, the ride.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, dude. No. I'll put a GoPro on your forehead like the train kid. Okay, that would be cool. Just facing Nick the entire time. Yeah. All right, no. This is good. it would be him being pokemon 48 times how many times do you think you could

be pokemon in that trip on an emulator with a like a like i could speed it up pokemon fire red um i bet you i could do it actually in half hours wait what if you have to go home alone style in the back of a u-Haul with Frank the Tank? Why are you having these ideas now, bitch? She got those fucking quarterbacks. She's ready to go. Wow, bright idea, Kate. Where was that?

You have to play Polka in the back of a U-Haul with Frank the Tank. With John Candy. A loser has to chop their cock off. Is John Candy alive? No. Damn. Oh, drenched. Oh, man, he's wet.

My goodness. That shirt looks kind of sick like that, though. Yeah, it does. It looks good wet. It looks good, too. Why don't we design shirts that look different when they're wet? Technology's not there. I don't know a yak thing to...

Yeah. My son has one of those, a jacket that changes color. There we go. Great job. Great job, Steven. Great draft. Everyone give it up for Steven Shea. Great impressions. We're going to do that today on Thursday. Okay, that's fine. Yeah, I know you have it ready.

Yeah, I sent it to Quigs last week. Last week. It's you have it ready. Yeah. I sent it to Quigs last week. Okay. Last week. It's great to be back. Great yak, everyone. Yeah, feels good. I think KB will be back this week, which will be great. We should buy him something.

We should buy him something. What about a Sprinter van? Let's give him a Sprinter van. Let's buy him a gun. Let's buy him a gun and a Sprinter van. Yeah. Both. How about the guns in there? It's in the glove compartment and we don't tell.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Don't get pulled over. And we put a bunch of blood over all of them. Let's buy him a Sprinter van from a murder scene. Buy him a burner. Yeah. Perfect. Okay.

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