The Yak - The Real Housewives Of The Yak | The Yak 11-9-21

Episode Date: November 10, 2021

Impossible not to be romantic about the YakYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Oh, Christ. Boys. Boys, boys. Where's Rome? Where's his goofy ass? There he is. He's out.

He's out? He's late. We lock on the door from now on? There's a palpable, wow, great word by me, palpable buzz in the office right now on? There is a palpable Wow, great word by me Palpable buzz in the office right now Wallow's here That's Gilly, you idiot That was not

I know, I was just trying to fuck with you Because you probably second guessed yourself for a second Gilly's the kid He is the kid He is DA kid Rone, you got a little shine to you What's up? Lotion.

I've been using lotion. You have? Yeah, body lotion. Roan, I have some bad news for you. Oh, fuck. You missed an incredible guest here in the office. Whom? I went to go grab a slice of pizza in the kitchen. Okay.

And I looked up, and also eating a slice of pizza was royalty. Actual bonaafide royalty. Was it Frank's cousin Abe? Nope. God cousin, I should say. Nope. It was the one and only Countess Louangela Sepps. Shut the fuck up.

Yes. What? Yes. She was just in here? I don't know if she's gone. Who is that? The Countess? The Countess.

The Countess. Money can't buy you class. Real Housewives of New York. It's learned. And she's tall and she's gone. Who is that? The Countess? The Countess. Money can't buy you class. Real Housewives of New York. It's learned. And she's tall and she's bad. But she's a real she's a real Countess.

I did a double take. I was like she's just you know sometimes like never meet these famous people these royalty. She was just eating pizza like a regular.

What? A plea. The stars are just like us? Yeah. Holy shit. Was she tall in person? So tall. Was her voice deep? Was she dolled up? Did she look nice? She looked Holy shit. Was she tall in person? So tall. Was her voice deep?

Was she dolled up? Did she look nice? She looked beautiful. A lot of questions, bro. I'm excited about this Bravo shit. The drone is also, he's the only one I can talk to here. All you guys are uncultured. Is she still here?

You want me to go get her? Try to find her. Go see if you can find the countess. She was in the kitchen. Go find the countess. How long ago was she in the kitchen? I'm going to lose it. If you can get the countess in here, I will give you $50. I'm going to fucking spaz if you can get the countess. How long ago was she in the kitchen? I'm going to fucking, I'm going to lose it. If you can get the countess in here, I will give you $50.

I'm going to fucking spaz if you can get the countess. Wait, was she actually here? Yes. I took a picture with her. I just tweeted it. I did hear when we were walking. It's too random of a name. Yeah, it's way too random of a name to just have.

Was she doing a million dollars worth of game? What's she in for? No, I think she was doing Pick'Em. She's filling in on Pick'Em. Trying out a new co-host. She would probably be incredible. She's not going to take shit from anybody. She would bark across the table at Rico.

So many people don't know who it is. Like, who is that? Oh, she looks great. Bro, she looked great. She looked great. We took it in the kitchen. We're just kind of tacky. I look like shit.

No, you don't. You're just happy. You look tired. I'm so tired. You're giddy. You look very happy. You're smiling with your eyes That's the biggest smile I've ever seen I've seen the fake smile and I've seen the real one

You used the face app thing And made it look like you smiled It's such a real smile That's how happy I was to see the countess You are fucking truly overjoyed to see her Dude she's royalty Have you ever met royalty? No

Francis have you met royalty? No. Sass? I have not. Exactly. Francis, have you met Francis? Also, the count might have cheated on her and they got divorced like 10 years ago, but she's still the countess. You don't lose that kind of thing. You don't lose a title like that. It's like coach.

You're just coach forever. Yes. Hey, coach. I love that. That's such a power move by her. I'm keeping this. I'm keeping this royalty by marriage. Yeah, it's coming back empty handed. Brandon is, oh wait, he's kind of Russian. moved by her. I'm keeping this royalty by marriage.

Yeah, it's coming back empty handed. Brandon is, oh wait, he's kind of Russian. Why are so many people here? He's a bitch. You're a bitch. I had a conundrum. What? It was a conundrum.

Yeah? When I got to the kitchen, there is a tall woman in there, but she looks too young to be a countess. I don't think it's the countess, but it's a tall woman I've never seen. Is it that woman? It's not her. Thank God I didn't say anything. You were just going to bring her in? Wait, so you're saying the countess

is old? No, no, no. I'm saying there was a young woman in there who's markedly young. She was tall. She's about six foot tall. It's probably one of Tommy's girlfriends. I don't know who it was, but she looked like she works here. She looked comfortable. But it's not anybody I've ever seen before.

A new worker? But it wasn't her. A new tall worker? I've actually said some really mean things about the Countess, so it's probably good that she's not in here. Oh, really? Yeah. You just have to pick sides.

I mean, she was a bitch. I mean, that's why she had to get sober. Yeah, the whole season? Well, she got sober because she got arrested. Yeah, well. Royalty can get arrested. But not everybody. sober because she got arrested. Yeah, well. Royalty can get arrested. But not everybody. Not everybody who gets arrested

gets sober, though. Yeah, no, she made the whole season about her sobriety, which was, I was killed. Yeah, it was a little bit tough. It's a little heavy handed now,

the whole Housewives thing. They're doing a lot of apologizing on the episode. You guys know a lot of the Housewives. Oh, dude, it's awesome. You know the Jersey ones? You know the Miami ones?

You know all of them? I actually think that might be my retirement plan is to just do a podcast about housewives. Bro, that would crush. Because it's like the actually only place that we are, like, there's not a lot of podcasts of men talking about the housewives. It's an edge. Right. It's an edge.

We have a niche. It's a niche edge. How many men are going to listen to podcasts about the housewives? We make it so immediately right to say. It's called being entertaining, Brandon. Try it sometime. Would you ever sit in for Andy Cohen on Watch What Happens Live? That's what I'm seeing.

I think that you could have Andy Cohen. You could totally do that. No, just take over for him when he gets too tired and him and John Mayer move off into the sunset or whatever. You could take over for Andy. Andy's great. Andy's the best. I couldn't do it.

You can fill in for him if he goes on vacation. Problem is, I would just like have to, you'd have to go through like, I just got Twitter fingers. I just say some real mean shit and I don't have that mean bone in me in person. I don't bring that same energy. No, neither do I. And people like act like you're like a coward. Yes, I know. I will absolutely talk shit behind Twitter. Yeah. That bring that same energy. No, neither do I. People act like you're a coward. I will absolutely talk

shit behind Twitter. When I meet you, I'll try to be your friend. Jokes for the show. When we had Dave on, everyone was like, Sass totally backed down during the Dave interview. What did you think was going to happen? You're just going to run game on Dave? I was going to be shitting on Dave to his face?

Never. That's never going to happen. Well, you tried to cancel him, didn't you? No. You were the first one. No. Did you say anything about his honesty? I didn't.

You still haven't? I said he was the most dishonest person. You've had plenty of time by now. There he is right there. Live look at the man. I do want to ask,ow. He has honest eyes. Almost two years ago to the day on the Yak, you said, I have some real opinions on the housewives.

The Countess, she's a real B-I-T-C-H. Yeah. Whoops. Yeah, you said what you said. Whose side were you on at the time? Because, I mean, then it was like a Bethany Frankel. Bethany Frankel was like the alpha dog. I don't really like Bethany either.

What? I think she might be a little bit of a B-word. How did she get the title of the Countess? She's a Bethany Frankel. Bethany Frankel was like the alpha dog. I don't really like Bethany either. What? I think she might be a little bit of a B-word. How did she get the title of the Countess? She's a girl boss, bro. Don't get it twisted. Did she start us? No, I actually like Bethany. Skinny girl margarita?

Yeah, I like Bethany. She's been on part of my take. What is a skinny margarita? No, I do. I can't. I don't know who else I don't like. I don't like Dorinda, I don't think. Yeah, or Dorinda's gone now.

Ramona, maybe? Can I get my question answered I love What makes her a countess Who's the one who like Will just like flirt With any young guy Oh Ramona

Sonia Sonia I love Sonia She's a party girl Or Sonia Morgan I love Sonia She's got energy Yes dude

Wait Dorinda No what's the one Ramona was the one That said she was dating Dave She's a pest Yeah I don't like Ramona She's one that said she was dating Dave Dave was like absolutely yeah I don't like Ramona she's annoying

she's got like like frantic like hummingbird energy it's too much it's a little bit she buzzes at too high of a frequency do you guys

do you know it's Ron's five year anniversary of Parsley today oh wow did you tweet it Ron no that's not true he's making it up it wasn't even two days ago

when was it you told us it was two days ago. No, it was five years since the Trump inauguration video. That's not what was on your first week here. Shout out, Rowan. The first month he was here, we went to Indianapolis, and he drove back with us on a bus that didn't work. What was that? That smelled like shit.

You were going to ride or die. And we were smoking corncob pipes. Yes. That was like three months of corncob for me. Watching Penn State, Wisconsin. That was a big comeback. It was bad. We almost left at halftime.

Saquon Barkley. Saquon Barkley, yeah. A young Saquon. You're a state guy. Saquon was there? Yeah. You met Saquon. Missed that guy.

Yeah, you saw him at the statue. Good guy. You met him? Yeah. Well, he guy. Yeah, you saw him at the statue. Good guy. You met him? Yeah. Well, he just ran right past us. We got to like, hey. Hey. Hey, how's it going?

Mr. Barkley. Love the pup. Yeah. Kelly. Kelly. Can you come here? Can you book us some Housewives on the Yak? Maybe.

It's not a no. And congratulations on your wedding Kelly We never took We never unfortunately Beautiful honeymoon I'll even take like I'll take the countess's friend Maybe

I'll take the countess's driver Yes Or like women who used to be on Who aren't even on anymore Yeah Like Tinsley So does she marry a count? Tinsley

Yeah Who is Tinsley? Was Tinsley somebody So does she marry a count? Tinsley, yeah. Who is Tinsley? Was Tinsley somebody? Fuck, what was the name of the woman who was on... John Mellencamp's daughter. She come from a count family? Her husband was like a jeweler? Yes.

Her husband was a jeweler? God damn it, Steven. I think he passed away. I think he died. What was his name? A jeweler? She had one husband, two husbands, three husbands. All right, so the countess was married to the count.

The count then cheated on the countess. Oh. But the countess decided on keeping the name. But if you get divorced, you don't lose the countess? No, she put a line in the sand and said, I'm staying. I'm not leaving this royal family, which I don't even know what that is. What are they a royal family of? Dutch?

I don't know. What is a count? I think it's like a duke. Yeah, it's like a duke. It's adjacent. It's a duke adjacent. Yeah, archduke, duke, count maybe or something like that. Lord.

Lord is somewhere in there. Maybe big collar, cape. Yeah, moat. You're just doing vampires. Cereal, that whole thing. It's a count. How do you not know a count? It's a count.

And then, dude, Erika Jayne. I mean, Erika Jayne's going through her shit if we want to just empty the fucking clip on that. It's equivalent to a British Earl. Okay, so we were right. A duke. What's a duke? Wait, I thought an Earl was a du and that there was a Duke of Earl. A Count is European.

Which in a British is not? It's equivalent to a British Earl. So I think England had them first and then Europe was like, oh, I like those. We'll make our own. So that's the Count. Count de la Seppe. Damn. We just fucking

we just bless the people with some some people are gonna love that and everyone else is gonna hate it. I feel sad for anyone who's like sitting here being not like wowed

the fact that we had royalty in this office eating one bite pizza in the kitchen. I think Kevin Garnett's here too. No he's not. I used to like Jacqueline Loretta and her family.

What? Jacqueline? You guys watch Jersey? Yeah, oh yeah. Yeah, I used to watch that. That was just Gaz. What? Shay.

Gaz. Kevin Garnett. Shay's just Shay's just eating from the corner. He's just getting his shots up. Economy of language. That was a zinger. He's like Clay. Yeah. Stephen Clay of language. That was a zinger. He's like Clay.

Steven Clay right now. Where is Gaz? Gaz is in here? Gaz is in Miami, dude. The whole office is here and no Gaz. Some good dark humor, Steven. Feels empty. But Eddie's here.

What are you talking about? Eddie's here. Why is everyone here? Well, we were into the Steelers-Bears game last night. Dave needed us. Yeah. Yeah, he needs his soldiers. He called in reinforcements.

And he just flew back here because we flew back and then he did the Dave Portnoy show. Jersey Jerry's a star, by the way. Really? People love Jersey Jerry. They love him. His video,

freaking out you guys weren't coming, was great. It was Jersey Jerry. He called me five times before this flight In the 24 hours before this flight And every time I was like This is a This is a

No like he just asked questions Like this is a This is a text message This is not a call He's like are you gonna wear a jacket? I was like yeah This is a text message dude This is a text message

He was he like Is that his first time on a private jet? So he just didn't know what to do? He didn't know that the nice part about a private jet is you literally show up two minutes before. Yeah. You show up two minutes before. Jersey, Jerry, I don't know where you're at. No, no, Jack.

The plane's leaving in five minutes. I'm at the airport, the jet place. But you're not here. I don't know where you're at please tell me you're coming still man please bye I mean I get that

yeah I pulled in as he was filming that so funny fucking Jersey he is so funny yeah I saw just everybody getting the pictures with him in his home

in his element I love him Steelers Nation and then I overheard in one of the videos do they in his home, in his element. I love him. Steelers Nation. And then I overheard in one of the videos, do they make their own ketchup in the box at Soldier Field? No, it was, I think it was Heinz Field in Pittsburgh. And I think that Eddie and I were at one point trying to, or it might have been Chief and I were trying to convince White Sox State

that they bottled the ketchup in the basement of Heinz Field. It was just a plant and they shipped it out from there? Yeah, we're like, yeah, yeah. That's why the grass is always bad here because underneath is a whole factory of ketchup. Steam coming up. Dude, I feel like I can tell when ketchup is not Heinz. Oh, 100%. If it's not Heinz, you taste it right away.

It tastes weird. It tastes weird. Is it salt? Sweetness? What is it? I think a lot of Heinz use apple. Really? Which I don't mind. A lot of non-Heinz.

It's not necessarily bad. It just instantly tastes different. It's not Heinz. Heinz has that much of a monopoly that we're just conditioned to be able to taste it exactly. Can we ask Wallow about meeting Kanye West? That's Gilly. Can't get me on that. I got Brandon earlier.

You did not get me. He was so confused. I was immediately, I told you who that was. He was like, what is it, really? Do you want Wallo? Yeah, can we just ask him

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Yes, definitely buy some Mugsy. They're good-looking jeans. I love Mugsy jeans. I've actually known those guys for a very long time. They were one of the first advertisers like a decade ago. So Mugsy jeans. They just fit right. Yeah, they look great.

Waller, we got to ask, dude. Ask me. You met the guy. You met the legend, the guy on your bucket list, Kanye. That's not my first time with him. It wasn't? No, we ran around all day in Minneapolis. In Indianapolis?

You were in Mindy? Mindy, Annapolis. Indianapolis, Indiana? No, Mindy, Annapolis, Minnesota. Oh, got it. He's just a regular dude, man, to me. No, he's not. Oh, you know what it is?

It's just that he don't lead with things, so everything is minimalist. It's simple. He's just simple. Yeah. Talk about regular shit like anybody else. Yeah. Shit like anybody else and piss like anybody else, I think.

Where were you guys when you were meeting? You were like at a court side. Even the body language, he was bending over to talk to you. No, when was this? No, we connected at a, me, it was me. Actually, WAC 100 reintroduced us. And we met at the Clearport. That was like, we just came to the game.

I don't understand any of these words. When was this? When was this? When was this? This was two days ago This weekend This was Saturday Oh yeah Kanye is like

Interested in what you are saying Yeah he's bending over him Body language expert I'm just gonna say it What were you saying In this picture Cause he's got a big smile On his face

Yo Kanye wants to fuck you I don't think I do I think so I don't think he. I do. I think so. I don't think he really want to do that. I just think he was talking about life

and regular shit and just, you know, not giving a fuck out here. Damn. And doing what you want to do. It was like... Kanye got some plastic surgery?

No, I think it's shaved eyebrows, maybe. I think he's doing different haircuts and I think that people are going to start following suit. I think people are going

to start getting the haircut he has. I got Pussycat cutting his hair. You think Big Cat would cut his eyebrows off? Pussycat would cut his stuff off. His eyebrows are nice. My eyebrows are pronounced.

It's actually a sign of wealth. It's a strong brow. Brandon, though. I have no eyebrows. Yeah, Brandon already has a fucking eyebrow-less. Just shave them off. He went the way of Villanueva long ago.

So you're interviewing KG soon? Yeah, I'm going to go check him out right now as soon as I finish this. Where's Gilly? He's on his way. Okay. You guys didn't drive up together? No. How come you're separate? No, because I had something to do. Who'd you drive up with? By myself. Huh. Yeah, by myself. What'd you have to do?

I didn't know if he drove up with anyone else. I had to give him somebody in Jersey. No, I didn't drive up with nobody else. I had to give him somebody in Jersey. Bruce Leroy? Was it Bruce Leroy? No, I wish. I ain't seen him in a long time.

You got to go link up with Bruce Leroy. Do you ever drive up with other people? No, I'm just driving up by myself. Got it. Yeah. Just ride it solo. This is an inside joke that only Walla and I get

But it's a good one I don't know, I'm laughing about it Sounds funny Walla will back it up I'm making some funny jokes right now If you were one of three people on earth I'd love to know Those are the best jokes

I'd love to be on the inside of the joke Life is just crazy I'm just enjoying life right now I'd love to know Those are the best jokes I'd love to be on the inside Of the joke It's crazy man You know Life is just crazy man Yes I'm just enjoying life right now Yeah you are I'm single

You're single I'm a new law I'm just enjoying life man You're single? Yeah Oh amazing news Yeah Amazing

I was just asking him How to marry Like cause he's This guy on 50 planes a month Yeah I was asking him How was married life how do you do it it's good but i don't say nothing she don't no definitely uh you have to

you know take a big time for both yeah sometimes or like this weekend i went on a trip with her to see her friends and stuff like that you got to have a little bit of a balance so uh everybody feels included you know yeah just bring everyone along Drive up from Philly to New York. That's killing me, man. My anniversary is this week. Oh, that's for you. How long have you been married? 15 years.

What are you going to get yourself? I'm not going to get myself anything. I'm taking her out to dinner. When? I'm getting her a new living room suit. Friday? A new living room suit. Where are you guys going to go?

The whole thing, you know, the whole thing. What's a living room suit? Suit, set, whatever. Is that a fucking night? Friday is like a birthday suit. Oh, I need you Friday, by the way. I need you. No, you don't.

Yeah, I do. You do not. For a stream. For what? What are we streaming? We're streaming. That sounds like you're a pussy blocker. You're a blocker.

If I can get the name. I don't get a lot of pussy nights. If I can predict who's playing on Friday night, you have to come. This is not that hard. And you can't have sex. Once you get married. Poise State, Wyoming. I don't think so.

Yes, I think so. I think it's Poise State, Wyoming. We're going to need you on that stream. Listen, both of you guys have been married 15 years. How long have you been married? Poise State, Wyoming. How much pussy do you get once you've been married that long? How often do you have

sex with my mother? He's a father of two recently. I'm a father of two. Relax, brother. Uncouth. We had the countess here a minute ago. What was the count, though?

No, the countess. She's royalty. Now you're asking sex questions, you pervert. I'm not saying I'm a pervert because guys want to know this out here that are ready to get married.

He's newly married. It gets way more, dude. These dudes don't even know. You start. The funniest part. Once they lock it down, they're like, okay, now it's my time to shine. But you're fresh. Yeah, but the funniest part about.

Oh, you're fresh. How many years you got? The funniest part about marriage is the trope. Oh, the women stop having sex. Like, dude, I'm tired, too. I don't know what you want me to say. I'm getting old. I feel like shit.

These three guys behind me is married. Now, I asked him. What are you doing? We're doing a show right now. He's doing it. He just got married. Get out of here, bro. It's a sponsored show.

Get out of here. He's been married for a while. I got two kids, four kids, six kids between the two of us. You're having a bunch of action. It's way more action. More than ever. He just got married. I do whatever I want.

No, no. I jerk off in the shower whenever I want. I got four kids. I got four kids. My bed's a crime scene. No, you don't get no water. That's not true. Whatever. I get it whenever I need. No, you don't get no no more, though. That's not true. Whatever.

I get it whenever I need it. What you say, pussycat? I said I jerk off in the shower whenever I want to. It's no problem. Marry life. So y'all saying- Put the fucking phone down. He's the only one that's living the LaVita Loca life.

That's the LaVita Loca. I'm Ricky Martin out here. Because he doesn't know how to talk yet. You're doing like a Larry the Cable Guy bit. He doesn't know how to talk about his marriage yet. He's just learning. He's going to be in. But listen.

It's actually, can I say something for real? It has nothing to do with marriage. It has to do with kids. When kids show up, it changes everything. That's it. No, I'm serious. That's wise. You get married and not have kids, it's no different.

But once the kids show up, your dick is on the shelf. No, it's just dick. It doesn't go on the shelf. It doesn't go on the shelf. It doesn't go on the shelf. It just on the shelf. Life changes. There's a lot of shit you got to put in a toolbox. You take it out when you need it.

Life becomes a lot of work. Just to let you guys know what's going on. There's no downtime. And it's just like that. Now, have you ever been engaged? Oh, man. Well, since you were asking about our sex life. No, no, no.

Have you ever been engaged? Oh, interesting. And you guys recently broke up? Yeah, man. Yeah, well, since you were asking about our sex life. No, no, no. Have you ever been engaged? Oh, interesting. And you guys recently broke up? Yeah, recently. What month? May or? You know, it was a couple months ago. Oh, it was?

April. Did you drive up from Philly to New Jersey with her, like right after you broke up, and tried to tell us you weren't broken up? Oh. What? Oh, my God. I mean, now the cat's out of the bag.

He comes down. While he comes to the up front, and he's there, and he's sitting backstage with Dave and I, and we were talking about how we got up here. He's like, yeah, me and my ex-fiance, we drove up. I'm like, what? He's like, well, we broke up last week. He's like, you drove from Philly to New York?

No, it wasn't a week. You guys are still together. And he's like, no, we're not. Yes, you are. It was a month. It was like a month afterwards. Yeah. And just casually drive up.

Yeah, that's all. So why did she come with you? That was then, up front. That was like two months ago. Yeah, up front was a couple months ago. But he was just like, yeah, we're broke. And I was like, no, I don't think so, dude. I'm out here.

I'm a single man just enjoying life. You get to do whatever you want whenever you want. I was trying to be really polite to her that day, and it makes more sense. I feel like she was, yeah. You actually were being a bad friend. I was. Yeah, to you I was being a bad friend. That's cool.

But, you know, it's like life goes on, man. Life, it is what it is. Single man. Is that true? Life goes on? Don't it? That's what you're supposed to say. Obadiah.

What do you think about Pete Davidson moving in on your boy's ex? You know what I mean? I've seen it. Yeah, what do you think about that? Yeah, what did you have to say about that? Pete, no, I don't even know. But, like, Pete's a hell of a guy out here. He's got a big dick.

Oh, I don't know about all that. That's the rumor. I do, I do know. He doesn't. What? How do you know? What are you saying? We were saying yesterday we think Ariana Grande just has a small pussy.

Oh, yeah. That's right. See, one thing I learned about Hollywood, anybody got a shot. If you want to see, everybody got a shot. Like, you know, if you're doing anything in that world, no matter how much money you got, no matter how much money you don't got, who you was married to, everybody got a shot out there.

Rank them. Rank them. Fame, power, money. Ooh. Power. One. Fame. Two.

Money. Three. Money. Three? Yep. Listen, let me explain something to you. I think I'd go money. Let me explain something to you.

Money, power, fame. Money, cash, hoes. You know how many people got money that can't get in rooms that I can get in? They got way more money than me. That money. That's true. So you have fame but not power? Do you have power and fame. Money cash hoes. You know how many people got money that can't get in rooms that I can get in? They got way more money than me. That money... So you have fame but not power? Do you have power and fame? I got power too. Oh, you do? In certain areas of concentration. Certain areas of life.

But what I'm saying is this. A lot of people got money No, it's true. But they can't even walk the fuck in here. It's why all the dorks buy the sports teams because they want the fame and the power. That the truth like that's why that's why you see people or like rich people running for uh government offices it's like they're just bored they just they have the money they want the power like all right i guess you're right but money money plus fame

equals power there's never anyone who has no i don think so. I think you can have power and not... You could get fame and... No. You could get money with power, but you can't do it vice versa, right? Money with... Well, you can get fame with money. You can't be a powerful poor person. Not as much, though.

Jeff Bezos wouldn't be... But what about the people? What about the people that have... He's got the power. He's got the three. He's got all three. What about the people that got money and they don't even leave with that shit? You can't even tell. Like in New York City, you could walk by a motherfucker and's got all three. What about the people that got money and they don't even leave with that shit?

You can't even tell. Like in New York City, you can walk by a motherfucker and don't even know. They got a shitload of money. See, I think that's the life goal. That's the real life. Yeah, having money and not having to flex it. You ain't got to flex it. Cool with yourself that you don't have to flex it. Yeah, you can wear some beat-up sneaks.

You don't care. You know what I mean? These fucking millionaires. Look at this. Look, look. That's just worth $1 don't care. You know what I mean? These fucking millionaires. Look at this. Look, look. That's just worth $1 million. Listen, you know what I mean? Millionaires running around here,

living in small little apartments and just enjoying life. Yeah. Going out to eat at nice restaurants every night and don't give a fuck. So it's... The most popular car of millionaires is a Ford F-150. Is that true? Yeah, most...

That was the Chevy Silverado, the strongest, most advanced Silverado ever. Think about that. You know why? A lot of guys that's farmers, they got their farmhouse, the strongest, most advanced Silverado ever. Think about that. You know why? A lot of guys that's farmers, they got their farmhouse. They don't give a fuck about that shit. Like, at the end of the day, we out here living, and what's the whole purpose? We all going to expire one day.

True. So, like y'all say, y'all kids. Running around in the house with y'all kids, raising y'all kids, educating y'all kids, having y'all family. I think that's life. Yeah, I agree. Because a lot of people out here is lonelier than a motherfucker. It's true. It's me.

I actually, last night, we went down to the Steelers-Bears game, and we did a tailgate, and it was refreshing because everything that's going on with Dave this last week and everyone hating Barstool, it's like you go out in public, and it's like those people don't live on the internet. They're not on Twitter. They don't obsess over every little thing. Those are real people and they love us. The people that, the people that really hate most of the time, they're internet people.

Right. The real people don't give a fuck. You got people that just sit, you got an audience of people that sit in there and wait for something to bandwagon. Yeah. They wait for a dark moment to bandwagon. You could be the, you could do everything you need to do for a year straight. One day.

One second. They're waiting for the moment. And you know what's going to happen? They're going to jump on it. They got 72 hours and then nobody gives a fuck anymore. Yeah, it's true. They're going to something new. Next.

That shit don't matter. It's true. But it's hard to remember that when it's happening. Oh, no, not me. I always know when that shit happens. Haters is your marketing team. He knows. My whole thing is, if you're speaking about me, if you're speaking about my brand in any

way, you're putting it out there. And guess what? They're going to land on my shit and see all this other shit going on so it don't fucking matter what's the saying haters are my marketing haters is your marketing is that from an one shirt what's your steven no that's my shit what's your saying oh yeah if you don't have haters you don't have fans i still don't really understand that no that one you don't have haters you don't have fans listen let me explain something because like you could have just hate like hitler just had i guess don't have fans. Listen, let me explain something to you. Because you could have just hate. Like Hitler just had fans.

I guess he did have fans. Haters is your marketing team. Meaning, when I say haters is your marketing team, I'm saying this. If I don't like Brandon, you know what I'm going to do? Yeah, let's use an example. He's a narcissist. He's out of shape. He doesn't have eyebrows.

Fuck all that. He doesn't know shit about college football. Hypothetically. The thing about it is, he do know about sports. At the end of the day, every time I go mention him, like I'm marketing the brand of him. That's why his name is Brand D. It's brand of him.

They spend billions of dollars a year on marketing. Marketing is like the biggest. So for somebody to be on Instagram or Twitter talking about you. I like it. People are going to hit it and say, oh, damn, this to be on Instagram or Twitter talking about you. I like it. People are going to hit it and say, oh, damn, this dude is interesting. Yeah, it's true. Because what they hating on you about that moment or that time, it's not going to supersede all the other shit you done did and the moments you done had.

So they'll introduce somebody to your fucking brand. That's true. I mean, that is – you're just describing the Dave Portnoy method. Every time he's in any controversy, I feel like he adds more fans. He's not going nowhere. Yeah. Because you know why? Dave don't sit down and take a dick in the ass.

He's going to get up. He's going to shake his butt. He's going to shake his ass. Oh, not there. Oh, whoa. Dave would never take a dick in his ass. He's not going to take a dick. No.

If I know one thing about Dave, it's he doesn't take any dicks in his ass. Do you even know Sass? Have you met Sass? Yeah, he's a legend. Okay. Bottom, bottom. That means a legend. Bottom, bottom.

He's 20 years old. He can't be a legend. He's still a legend in his own world. Oh, in his own head? Everyone's their own legend. Yeah, he thinks he's all cow. Because you know why? He don't care.

He walks around. Them fucking Chuck Taylors look like they wounded warriors. Yeah. He don't give a fuck. By the way, I think Stephen Chay's saying actually makes sense the more I think about it. If you don't have haters, you don't have fans. Yeah, but you want to have more fans than haters. Right.

You don't even want to think about it or give a fuck. Just talk about me. Thank you. Yeah, but if you don't have- It's going to catch on. It'll catch on to who we need to catch on to. If you have no haters, that means you have no fans. Maybe?

Find me an example of someone that's universally hated with zero fans. But if you don't think about Stephen Chay's very hard, it makes a lot more sense. But there's nothing in the world that's universally liked or disliked. I got to get out of here. I got to go do an interview. Okay, have fun. Have fun. Say hi to Kanye for us next time.

I love you. I love you. Tell Kanye we said what's up. Dave says they don't boo nobodies. That's Reggie Jackson. Reggie Jackson slash Dave Blum. He sounds like he's been hanging out with Ye. I love Lama.

On that preaching. I've told this story, but when we had the Philly house in Philly, the gambling house in Philly, I should say, and I was walking back from a marathon session of watching sports at midnight, and he happened to be driving literally as I was walking across the street we then did like he like basically did that for an hour and a half and like one in the morning on the side of the street we just sat and like wrapped small talk olympics it was incredible he's in the small talk olympics eddie's in the small talk olympics frankie borelli's in the small talk olympics these are guys that could just fucking chat

dude they could just chew the fat we used to have we used to have these like bi-weekly calls with uh million dollars for the game uh with like the whole business team like eric goes on it and whatever and there's one time where eric is asking him a question like talking to him and then wallace goes hold up man and he goes there's a garbage truck driver that he knows and just opens up a full conversation with the garbage truck driver and there are 20 people on this phone call it It's like, all right, well, I guess we'll wait until it's done. Was it your fave trash man? Because that dude is on Instagram. He's a Philly trash man.

He's incredible. Your fave trash man? He's fucking sick. What does he put out? Just like motivational shit, dude. That's why I think that Waller would like him. And he puts out the trash. Every fucking day.

Damn, dude. He wasn't telling us the real shit Kanye was talking about. No, he wasn't. Kanye, he's guarding secrets for Kanye. I can see it right now. Oh, yeah. Kanye definitely gave him some pearls of wisdom. He gave him something to be dead within 48 hours.

Yeah, we should have pushed harder on Davidson. That could have been a real headline. Kanye says Davidson's a little pussy or something like that. But they're probably on a different vibration than that. Probably. For sure. Different ways. All right, I got to go, too.

Oh, come on. See ya. I have to do some interviews. Skip them. With the Countess? No, I wish. I'll be in tomorrow, though. Friday, we're out.

Friday's going to be a Brandon and Owen show. We're all out? Is everybody out? Are we doing the music video? Yeah. That's this Friday? Yep. Uh-oh.

Fuck. We've had to push it back so many times. Do you have to push it back again? No, no, no. That's like you're getting geeked for someone to cancel plans. Oh, yeah. I've been you're getting geeked for someone to cancel plans. Oh, yeah. I've been doing a no Friday policy recently. I've been not working on Fridays.

It's been incredible for my mental health. But I have to work this Friday. I mean, mental health is paramount. We should move it. For your mental health. For my mental health. Go to betterhelp.com slash son. For my mental health. For my mental health. Go to betterhelp.com slash son. For my mental health.

It's my anniversary, too. Well, good thing you won't have to be able to do a, you won't be in the music video. Is Benny going to fly out for this? I don't think so. That's a bummer. I'd really like it for my mental health. Yeah, for your mental health. Aren't you going to be late?

Huh? Can you give a quick insight? I talked to Eddie today, and he said that White Sox Dave was going at some guy oh it was very funny we were at uh we're in the box i mean i love white socks dave i've said it a billion times said a billion more he's makes me laugh harder than anyone at barstool uh but we were in a suite and it was we you know it was a pen suite so it was a it was a combo deal we we got jersey jerry to a game because he wanted to go to a steelers game but we also did like we did the tailgate we got to see a bunch of people everyone was very cool and then we went to a suite where it was like our you know big time betters like whale betters

and uh this guy had a significant significant wager on the steelers and white socks dave was like screaming at him like fuck you that was a was a fumble. And think significant wager. He was about to throw him out of the box. The guy actually, to his credit, was the coolest guy ever. I would have been losing it. He was like, eh, whatever. It's just part of the experience. Yeah, I think he just had a good amount of money.

But it was pure White Sox Dave. He was spitting into a White Claw can, just screaming at this guy who had so much money on the Steelers. It was pure White Sox Dave. He was spitting into a white claw can, just screaming at this guy who had so much money on the Steelers. It was fucking awesome. But that's White Sox Dave. My man loves tobacco. He's the best. He also was...

One last White Sox Dave story. When we were at the tailgate, they were a little late, so a few people came up to me and were like, hey, let's do a shotgun. And I was like, I'm not doing shotguns. White Sox Dave will do it for me. So White Sox Dave showed up and I was like, dude, you got like five shotguns that you have to like race. And so he started doing it.

And I would like go with him and be like, hey, you challenged me. Here's White Sox Dave. And so the people that were doing it against him I would I would hold their uh elbow down to start so that White Sox Dave had a huge jump start and he like he thought he was winning every single one he just didn't know he thought he was an animal like the people would like try to like you know like they'd go like this and I'd just be holding their elbow down so they couldn't lift the beer can that's he was demol And he was just demolishing people. We were basically like pool sharks.

We were just walking around the tailgate just being like, you want to go at my boy? Put some money up. He'll beat all of you. Does he know? Does he have any idea? No, I told him after. Yeah. I fucking love him.

He's so fucking funny. Just putting a donut on him? He's just the best. All right. I'll see you guys tomorrow. I'll be in tomorrow. All right. I'm ready for tomorrow. All right. See you tomorrow. You'll be in tomorrow. All right. I'm ready for tomorrow.

All right. See you tomorrow. You'll be there Friday for Boise State Wyoming? No. No. What the fuck, Brandon? I'll be at dinner with my wife of 15 years. Steak?

Oh, yeah. Steak. Zah. Maybe some seafood. Zah won't be there at all. Knock this mic out of the way. I want to look you in your eyes. Yeah, I can't.

I want to look you in your eyes. Spin it. Spin it. Give it a spin. Yeah. Yeah. Lay it down. Lay it a spin. Lay it down. Lay it down easy. Lay it down gentle like. Don't do that. You watched The Departed last night? I did. Phenomenal movie.

Is that your first time seeing it? Yeah. Is there one over here? It's amazing. I'm trying to do this one thing. Actually, Stephen Shea, I need a recommendation from you. I didn't grow up watching movies. I was just a sports guy, so I missed out on pretty much all the classics. I've only watched like Friday, all the Chris Tucker movies. That's about it.

That's the classics? Yeah. Friday, Money Talks. Money Talks is a classic. Can we each recommend a movie to you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure, for sure, yeah. Rush Hour, yeah.

Rush Hour and all that good stuff. Wait, we're all just recommending a movie? Yeah, everyone send them one movie. That last scene. By the way, what did you think about the last scene? Which one? With the rat? Yeah, with the rat yeah with the rat oh i love much it's perfect that you thought it was a bit much yeah i thought it was great oh i thought that when the rat comes in it's amazing yeah i thought that was great a lot of people have pulled me pulled me to the side saying that it sucked but oh i didn't know anyone thought that i love that

how many people are pulling you aside about the departed today uh two two or three i didn't get that he was a rat until i saw that last scene and then it all came together and i was like oh fuck i know he was like and then it was like when he made the face what is the song that plays at the end forget what it is it's the pizza review song from dave's pizza reviews that's the fucking i think it's the golden hour one. Ken Jack just walked by. You see Ken Jack got quote tweeted by The Rock on Twitter. Really? With a picture of Tom Cruise's fake ass or something?

It's about drive. It's about power. That's fire. What is the picture in the background? Yeah, what am I looking at here? That is the fake ass. The Tom Cruise fake ass. Right?

Yeah, but I can't make it out. I don't know what it is. It's Tom Cruise's fake ass. I don't know what to tell you. It's Tom Cruise's fake ass, right? Yeah, but I can't make it out. I don't know what it is. It's Tom Cruise's fake ass. I don't know what to tell you. It's Tom Cruise's fake ass from that movie. Have you never seen Tom Cruise's fake ass? So the picture is of Tom Cruise's fake ass. Can we see Tom Cruise's fake ass,

just a straight picture of his fake ass? It'll help Sass kind of contextualize the entire thing. Because you probably don't know what his fake ass looks like. You haven't seen a man's fake ass. I heard you're about to get a fake ass implants ass. You getting ass implants? I would.

Just to get a little bricked up for the fucking homies. Yeah. That's Tom Cruise's face. And that's a tight shot on his fake ass. It's too tight. There you go.

That shit is voluptuous. It just goes and goes. How did that fake come about? Is that digitally enhanced? No, they probably padded his ass in there. Yeah, he's loaded. But do you think that it was definitely cosmetic, or do you think that it was maybe functional,

or he just wanted to look like he had a fat ass? Do you think he has a good ass under there, that it's just the angle maybe, the trick lighting? I would imagine he has a small ass he's insecure about. I bet it's small but tight, though. I'll tell you what I watched this weekend. I watched Jerry Maguire. That held up a lot better.

Did you say Jeremy Guire? I watched Jeremy Guire, and Cuba Gooding's performance holds up very, very well. I was emotionally into the movie. It was great. Yeah, it does hold up well. The Tom Cruise stuff isn't whatever, but Cuba Gooding Jr.'s performance is crap. What about the Zellweger stuff, though? Ah, it's just...

Just no. That's some first-wave feminism shit. All of them sitting around there with their wine glasses, reading books about how men suck and shit. Yeah, and shit like that. They just need to find some fucking romance. That's what they do. But the first, doesn't he, is there a sex scene with his first?

Yeah, Kelly Preston. With Kelly Preston in it. Yeah. Did she die? Did she die? Dude, I don't know. Not in the movie. Kelly Preston just died?

Did she? I feel like she just died. Maybe she didn't. And she's Cruz's age? She's Cruz's age. Maybe she didn't die. That was a smoldering romp that sex oh that was a good that was a good sexy yeah a smoldering romp is how i'd categorize

it you never saw jerry mcguire owen i knew sass hasn't oh kelly preston definitely did yeah shut up big dad that's a bummer how did she die oh she stopped living but not was it coco that's that's prime coco oh she was married to Travolta? Yeah, you didn't know that? What? Yeah. So she was married to Travolta while she... She had cancer.

Oh, breast cancer. Not fun. That shit sucks. While she was fucking Jerry Maguire. That's terrible. That's very sad. 57. Damn, you gotta watch Jerry Maguire.

You saw Sass just watch Moneyball for the first time? Yeah, just saw that. Saw that. I'm fascinated. That was actually my first one, too. Was it? What did you think? On Saturday.

Great. Why don't you guys commiserate? We watched it the same time. Yeah, yeah. So I was actually saying that to Che that when you said that yesterday, it was kind of weird. I was like, holy shit, I watched the same thing. That is weird that you watched it independently. I think it might be recommended on Netflix.

Yeah, that's what it was. It was on the Netflix. Because I had a bunch of people that said that they DMed me. They're like, I just watched this, too. Bro, we're all living the same life, bro. It's fucking crazy. Would you think they should have traded Giambi or what? They should have traded him.

That's awesome. Yeah, that's what I saw. He was being a goof in the fucking locker room. So that's actually true, right? His brother's the one that coaches the Yankees or whatever? No, he's playing for the Yankees. He left the A's first, and then they got – There we go.

Yes. But that's about Jeremy. But that movie is – It's a pro-jim shit. I love the movie, but they also had Miguel Tejada that year. They had some great starters. They should have won. What do you think about Billy being not taking the offer from the Red Sox

for $12 million? Well, he's a Moneyball guy. He belongs in a smaller place. True. Yeah, he could have just spent it. You were mad they didn't win, but that's like the whole point of the movie. No, I wasn't mad. I was just like, it would have been cool if they won.

It would have been cool. But then he goes in the car, listens to his daughter's song. And cries like a bitch. Did you like the movie? Yeah, I loved it. I watched The Miracle last night. You watched Miracle? Yeah.

Why are you in such a big... Is this the first time you saw Miracle? No, I've seen Miracle like a hundred times. But I haven't seen it since I was it. I watched Miracle last night. You watched Miracle? Yeah. Why are you in such a big... Is this the first time you saw Miracle? No, I've seen Miracle like a hundred times, but I haven't seen it since I was younger. Plus, his brain's changing. Oh, it's good as fuck. He's fucking inundating himself with testosterone. He's watching War and Sports. I am.

I like that. War and Sports right now. Fuck yeah. He's forming his cerebral cortex. Yeah, it's all happening right now. It's all movies I've seen. Moneyball is the only movie I haven't seen recently. Still Becoming a Man.

Becoming a Man is watching sports movies from your youth. And watch Jerry Maguire too, dude. That shit is manly. Yeah, yeah. By the end it is, yeah. Yeah, I'll definitely try that out. It gets knocked out. For sure, for sure.

It gets knocked right out. That kind of sounds like ass. Jerry Maguire is my favorite movie. Jerry Maguire and The Truman Show are my two favorite movies Truman Show is one of my very very favorite as well Truman Show is good

No it sounds like ass Truman Show sounds like ass No I've never seen it and it sounds like ass I like Truman Show Yeah well it sounds like ass to me Well Jerry Maguire sounds like ass You'd be about to go watch

Josh Richardson's movie What have we described What have we described Jerry Maguire that's bad What is it about Nothing I'm joking, Brandon. I know, but I wanted to continue the... I watched the Addison Rae movie four times.

That movie was crazy. Was it your little sisters or something like that? No, it's just so bad it's funny. It's really bad. What's so bad about it? Just the writing. It's just a lot of cliche high school stuff. And then they signed her for a four movie contract.

Probably did Numbies. Probably. Probably did. Guys like Owen are watching it, boosting it in the algo. I watched it. It was good. I'm about to watch fucking Josh Richards movie four times just to help out. Does he have a movie?

He just got signed to his first movie deal. What do you have? Gruen muted on Twitter on the day of his surgery? Unbelievable. I think so. Oh, is today laughing? Yes, dude. It's probably going on right now. Should we call him? Gruen's in and on the day of his surgery? Unbelievable. I think so, yeah. Oh, is today LaPen? Yes, dude. It's probably going on right now.

Should we call him? Gruen's in and out of surgery every week. Let's call him. He loves that shit, bro. How long does a good LaPen take? It depends on how many fucking... Is that long surgery? How many songs you play for.

Let's call him up, bro. Let's get Gruen on the line and see if... Dude, it's also my grandmom's 95th birthday today. Shout out to my grandmom. Do you know her? Could you recognize her? Oh, yeah, dude.

She's the fucking goat, dude. Oh, yeah, he should be in surgery. Well, he might be out of surgery. Your grandmother's 95? Yes, dude.

Isn't your grandma a big Bulldog fan? I'm much older than you. My dead grandmother who just died, it was 80. Really? Yeah.

We have young grandparents in Mississippi. Our parents, yeah. Our lineage was fucking differently. Really? Yeah. We have young grandparents in Mississippi. Our parents, yeah. Our lineage was fucking differently. We fuck early in the sip. My grandma went and fucked around in Japan for a minute. She was just out in Japan. Isn't that not true at all for you, though?

For me, no. But just general rule, we fuck early in the sip. Yeah? Yeah. Like six-year-old great-grandparents type of thing? Correct. Yeah, I had a great-great- great grandmother alive until i was 20 years old i had a great great tracks yeah great great i had a double great grandmother so you were almost a fucking great great great like if you're

great great great and lived to 80 you would have had a great great great it could have been a great great great what the fuck if i were fucking early early, if I were on track. You would have been in the great, great, great track? You could have made one of those TikToks with like, hi, mom. Meet mom. Yeah. And it's just a bunch of fucking great people that's coming in. Those ones are always great. Are there great, great, great TikToks?

Oh, yeah. People who are just on the fuck schedule? Fertile families? I wonder if there's ever been a great, great, great, great. No. There definitely has been. I bet there has been. Well, yeah.

I mean, the Bible. I know in my life, the people I've known in my circle, I've known like 34-year-old grandparents. Really? Yeah. Yikes. Like when they were having kids at like 14,

they were also only living to like 30. So there wasn't like great, great, greats back then. I think there were more old people than you think. Old people have always existed. We didn't just invent old people. Not true. You think there was 85-year-olds in like Nazareth? Maybe not back then, but I'm talking about like 100 years ago.

There probably will be sometime because they say that the first person to live to 150 is alive right now. But there's also people who argue that like 120 is like what we're capped out at or like 122 is just like humans will not be able to i mean anything over 80 seems like a bit much being 150 would be crazy dude my grandmom has 15 years past 80 and she's like trucking like she was fucking teaching kids at 80 like she's going huh oh she's trucking she's fucking go to She's fucking goaded. She driving? She came to, not driving,

but she came to my wedding in Philly and was just like up all night with everybody. Like she was just. Yeah, some old people are just like built different. She's built different. My neighbor was,

he's like 90 and he would just be outside no shirt on and he would drink wine. Smoking cigs. He would drink wine out of a mug to make it look like it was coffee

and he'd just be like doing like manual labor all day. Because at that point, why not? He was literally ripped. Yeah. She played tennis till late. She was fucking swimming, swimming laps. I think you just got to stay active.

I don't know. He had super bad vertigo, and then one day my mom went outside, and he was just on the roof of his house. My mom had to go over. He had teleported. His vertigo was fucking... My mom had to go over and make him get down because he just got diagnosed

with super bad vertigo and he's just up on the roof cleaning the shingles I thought he was just lost and he wound up on his roof or something like that he just was up there working that sounds like something like

oh you have vertigo and he's like where's the one place I can't go the roof dude Coley used to have vertigo and he's like where's the one place i can't go yeah the roof dude coley used to have vertigo and he like he was like gonna be dave's like social media guy and he went to the serious the first day and it was like the 86th floor and he was he just like quit on the spot because it was too too high for him his vertigo was kicking in he got it from doing too much molly wasn't there the uh the combine too he tried to do the high jump and he couldn't jump he couldn't

look up he just simply couldn't look up. He just simply couldn't look up. That's a preposterous affliction to have. You can't look upwards. You'll pass out from looking up. I love looking up. I guess it's a little bit harder than fucking... Looking down is a lot easier, yeah. It's disorienting a little bit.

Kind of get your head going a little bit. Get your blood swashbuckling around in your fucking head. Shit happens. Shit happens to the best of us. The best of us. What did you do all weekend, Brandon? Oh, you talking to me? Yeah, bro.

I don't remember. I was sick Thursday and Friday. I didn't come to work. And then Saturday and Sunday. Oh, me and the boys went hiking. Me and the two middle boys. Yeah? Where did you guys hike?

We all love hiking in here. Except for Owen, but the rest of us do. I quietly hike pretty often. Do you really? Yeah, I was wrong. I just don't. You didn't see a cow? No, I was wrong. What do you mean you didn't see a cow?

He thought he saw a cow on a hike. It was a female, apparently a female moose. It's a cow. Yeah. You live, you learn. Brandon, did you see the Fox News? What Fox News? Tucker.

Tucker Carlson. Dave was on. Oh, yes, I did see that. I did see that. Foxes are awesome. Zass doesn't think foxes are awesome, Ron. And foxes are awesome animals. No, I never said that.

You said, if I could see, you said, like, if you could see any animal in the wild. I said, low-key, the fox is one of the most thrilling animals to see in the wild because you don't see them a lot. They're very – And then we agreed to disagree, and I said maybe it's just different because when I grew up there was foxes in my yard all the time. I think it's exciting but not thrilling. I think thrilling is an adjective too far.

Bald eagle? Bald eagle is thrilling. Bald eagle is cool. When I see a fox, I'm like, oh, there's a fox in the yard. I like seeing foxes. I get more excited when I see a deer. Than a fox. Yes. Deer are more excited when I see a deer. Than a fox? Yes.

Deer are much more common. Deer are way bigger. Why would you pick something that you could see? Yeah, that's what I meant. I would pick seeing a giraffe in Antarctica. But I pick things that I have seen. What is my experience? You gauge your excitement.

You have no imagination. I'm not going to see a moose in West Point, Mississippi. I'm not going to see an elk. Exactly. So why wouldn't you pick a moose? Because I'm not going to see a moose in West Point Mississippi I'm not going to see an elk exactly so why wouldn't you pick a moose because I'm not going to see one but you were saying if you could pick anything the list was

the list was never can I pick anything that was never the list he made that up that was not the list the list was the things I've seen I'm way more interested in Zah's perspective on this on the most interesting things in your experience animals that you've seen. I'm way more interested in Zah's perspective on this. On the most interesting things in your experience

animals that you've seen. Because I feel like you probably have a way more broad just like most exciting animal to see. That you just have seen by happenstance.

Shit. You know what? Actually the biggest thrill was probably a rhino. I would say that was probably the white rhino. White rhino was the biggest thrill.

I don't know where he brought his color in. Why were you looking at white rhinos? Were you like... Is that a country club? What's Brandon saying? Brandon, you said low-key best animals to see in the wild. Fox, owl, woodpecker. Low-key.

Woodpeckers are awesome. He's talking about a rhino right now. You're not talking about a common woodpecker. You can get a woodpecker a rhino right now. You're not a common woodpecker. You can get a woodpecker at fucking Shake Shack. You ever seen a good woodpecker? A fox is an underrated animal. They look so cool. Probably my favorite animal to see in the wild.

I love seeing a fox in the wild. Penguin in the wild would be fire. Best animals to see in the wild. America edition. Yeah, bald eagle, bear. Bald eagle, bear, fox, owl, buck. Yeah. I mean, it's not a bad list.

Bear sounds way more exciting. Bear I would be number one. You guys ever seen a bear in the wild? No. buck. Yeah. I mean, it's not a bad list. Bear sounds way more exciting. Bear, I would be number one for bear. You guys ever seen a bear in a while? No. I'd shit myself. Yeah, it's startling. I've seen a bear at like a zoo. Not cool.

I don't know what the fuck with zoos like that. Zob, what were you about to say about rhinos? I completely forgot what I was about to say. But white rhinos. Fair, fair, fair. Oh, the thrill. What's it called? So pretty much basically how rare they are.

They're almost extinct, one. Just their nature. They're aggressive. We were out on safari. We were camping. You're not meant to have a fire. We left our campfire on, and the fucking thing just came and trumpled it over pretty much. No way.

Are they technically – I think they've gone technically extinct now. Yeah, I don't know the definition. Like the technical term. Yeah, definition-wise. The black one is. There's not enough where they can come back. There we go. Black, so we only have like three in the world.

Sidney Wells was out there eating. Sidney Wells was out there playing buck hunter. Do you think I would completely destroy Barstool if Sidney Wells posted a picture with like a dead rhino? No. Great catch. People would be like, look at that bull. Unbelievable.

Do you think anything can take this down? No. Too big to fail, brother. I think a rhino is like, are they the strongest animal or one of them? I think the ant is. It's actually a beetle. A beetle is pound for pound. Zod, would you take the yak to Zimbabwe?

I don't know. He wines too much, so absolutely not. You pointed at me when you said that? You definitely were. Me? I mean, if we don't have fucking Chick-fil-A in Zimbabwe, what are you going to eat? Of all the people on the show, I'm the whiner? As I said, we don't have Chick-fil-A in Zimbabwe.

What the fuck are you going to eat? Why are you calling me out there? You're the top winery. There's too much sun out there. I would do great in Zimbabwe. You wouldn't be able to handle the sun. Oh my god, the safari migrants. So I think you would, but I don't think you'd give it a chance. I would. I would love to go to Zimbabwe.

No, I don't think you would. The outdoors guy. I don't think you would. The dung beetle. I grew up in extreme heat. Because I looked at this exact list. It's like all bugs. Yeah. A rhinoceros beetle. Okay. That's not a bug.

Gorilla. But wait, if you look at what they can carry, it's crazy. Shout out to the fucking bald eagle. Stronger than a tiger. Oh, look at this strong motherfucker. Oh, I thought it was a yak. I was about to nut. Elephant, really?

It's interesting if you read... PlayStation? It's interesting if you read what they can carry. It's Luka. Speaking of Luka, what about Jokic just killing a guy last night? I mean, people don't know that. People are all talking about Markeith Morris getting bodied by Luka's... Or Jokic's two brothers, but he has three brothers of his own,

plus his other brother who's in the NBA. He has a lot of brothers. They have a lot of brothers. And those brothers are brothers. That's a difference. Bands are brothers. Yeah, so, I mean, I'd love to see that, not to sprinkle in too much sports. Jokic, he's a baseball player.

Basketball. Bro, I'm trying to remember. No, he's – My player basketball bro i'm trying to run no he's too came on pmt's intern and i think he's notoriously stupid all right here we go oh he just ran out of run it back we gotta run it again because he couldn't look up he had to kind of guess where it was. 20, 21 years, I think. I have never seen anyone miss. He can't look up.

Just put his head down and grab his nutties. I'll call mine first. There's like a note section. Oh, shit. Blind Mike out there. He almost knocked the whole thing down. I think that means you can jump the entire way if you just knock it all down. Coley's 6'5".

He's a big boy. Yeah, bro. Coley. You never met Coley? No, no. I don't think I've met him. I've seen him once, I think, in the office, but I don't think I've ever met him in person. Actually, Coley might be in the Small Talk Hall of Fame or in the Small Talk Olympics.

I've had a phone call with him. He's a good one. Yeah, that boy can talk, bro, with anybody. He'll chew some fat. I'm a big Coley guy. Yeah, I talked to him on the phone for like an hour. What did he say? Blog more?

And you're like, nah. No, he was just like, do whatever you want to do. Was he? Yeah. Yeah, he has the vision. He definitely has the vision. We're going to get out of here soon, but fucking not yet. Oh, we got a good minute and a half left.

I'm enjoying Owen's outfit today. Thanks. I like those pants. Target. Can I get them off you? Do you think the Patagonia over the sweatshirt is weird? No, actually, I meant to respect you. What's not weird about it?

They said it was weird. It's very common. It's a Patagonia over a hoodie. It's a LaBeouf staple. It is a LaBeouf staple. I actually looked up Shia LaBeouf. I don't know Shia LaBeouf's style. Well, Shia doesn't dress in clothes. He dresses in shapes. Yeah, and also a lot of people do this.

That's what he said in an interview. But you don't often wear a Patagonia. You often just wear the bear sweatshirt. That's been your sweatshirt for the last two weeks. It's been a uniform. Look it. So you're going for Shia LaBeouf? No, I've worn this.

I've worn this for like two years. He's, yeah, LaBeouf is probably off Sasquatch's wave. Probably, yeah. He definitely is. I'm not even pulling strings right now. It's weird when you say Sasquatch, not just Sass. I think it's weird when you say Lil. I've completely dropped the Lil.

You don't say Lil anymore? I think I just say Sass, too. Yeah, Sass. I'd definitely say Little. Little Sasquatch. I don't say Lil. Lil. But I think you need another nickname,

like how Eminem had Slim Shady or whatever. You need a third thing. I guess King of New York kind of is. Yeah, but you have Rabbit, how he had Rabbit, too. B-Rabbit. You need another nickname. King of New York's a title, though, not a nickname. I know, but people can call him that.

Lil Wayne has a few, right? Yeah, all rappers have a couple things that they can be called. I think that Lil Sasquatch essentially is a rap name. You need to have an extra one, so just be in the market and on the lookout for it ron what is your nickname ronnie ronnie baby the prince uh hard white uh crisco the muffin man bro i have fucking aka's on board bro you don't think are you are you the king yet no uh uh it was i was the king for a minute because you were soon to be the king Soon to be the king for a while Then I won king of the dot twice

But then I lost it So it's like But once you're king Aren't you always king? Let me put it in dozen terms Oh like a countess Are you getting back into the battle game? I don't know

Probably not But I overheard some phone calls That sounded like it Oh wow Wow Sass About to fucking suspend your ass from Twitter for putting out my personal emails like that. Bro, that shit is whack, bro.

Roni Baby the Prince is making a comeback. No, it's a whole different idea. It's not necessarily a battle rap idea. But I'm trying to include my friends who are battle rappers in the idea because I think that they're talented, undervalued individuals. I think Battle Rap is a great platform for people who are super talented but don't necessarily have a natural outlet for their talent. Proven ground. Yeah, and they just don't fit into a corporate world of how a talent is supposed to be configured.

Trying to unlock the boys. Let the boys eat a little bit, if you know what I mean. People should be able to gamble on battle rap, too. That's something I would like to make happen as well. Structure for battle rap to be gambled upon within the Barstool Sportsbook. I feel like that shit would be fucking cool. Can results be messed with, though? Can results be wrong?

I mean, it's like boxing. I think that there could be some kind of point system and that people will always be able to argue with things. But if you have some type of judging federation where people are vetted and paid and it's an actual job. Does the knockout exist in battle rap? Is there like a line? Could you drop a line so bad that it just ends the whole thing immediately? I had a dude just walk off stage during a battle against me before.

I guess that's kind of like the equivalent of TKO. You walk off stage like that I mean you never battle again right no you do I think you do I think some people just come back it's just part of the narrative people have thrown up

a bunch of times in battle raps really people have thrown up like multiple people have thrown up during battles why

because of nerves they say I mean people will have excuses they'll be like oh I was just this or that but it's obviously nerves they'll be like

I drank too much water today it's like no bitch you're fucking nervous. Somebody who wanted to get into viewing battle rap, do you have one you would recommend? I would watch the compliment battle that I have against this guy, Pat Stay. That's a good one to kind of just shows how fun and creative it can be. But if you want to just watch actual rap battles, the one against this dude, Big T, fat guy who I –

Big T? Yeah, he lost a bunch of weight. I didn't know he had that in him. Yeah, bro, he was a whole – Oh, different Big T. against this dude, Big T. Fat guy who I... Big T? Yeah, he lost a bunch of weight. I didn't know he had that in him. Yeah, bro. He was a whole... Oh, different Big T. He was the original Big T. This guy is a second gen...

Could you battle rap Big T? I would like to see that. I think I'd be far too mean for anybody in here. There's some fragile egos in here. And I'm not talking about Big T. I'm just saying everyone. But love the game. Miss the the game i haven't been in the game have you gone to any battles recently uh no but they're all on like pay-per-views like

it should be big business i haven't been to one in uh in a minute but it'd be nice to get it'd be nice to get out there there's big money now too like it's fucking ton of money in it and think all the money that could be in it if you're fuck drake just fucking had a whole card dude he just hosted a whole card. They're going to do a thing where it's like 10 celebrities put up $100,000 and like 10 battle rappers all get championed by a celebrity. They're going to give a million dollars out to like Drake's organizing it all. It's like fucking just big business.

It's just why not get in the game? Why not be in the mix? Got to. It's a whole other side. A whole other side of things that I kind of miss a little bit. But like Jersey Jerry, missing the blue collar life. Yeah. Dude, I miss writing poems for some men.

Saying homophobic slurs, man. It was my fucking bag. That's the best. Let's get the fuck out of here. Yeah, let's go. Vote for the chicks in the office, though. Vote for the chicks. Let's get the fuck out of here. Yeah, let's go. Vote for the chicks in the office, though. Vote for the chicks in the office for the People's Choice Awards. Support the ladies in here.

Listen to Son of a Boy Dad. Listen to Son of a Boy Dad, for sure. Listen to Unnest Rough. And that's all we'll plug for now. We'll see you tomorrow. Bye. It's the act. It's the act.

It's the act. We'll see you next time. Thank you.