The Yak - The Slap Wheel Returns | The Yak 4-12-22

Episode Date: April 12, 2022

There's a new slap king in townYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo. Yo. Yo. Plus 1,000? 1,000? 1,300? The worst line ever set. Like, I wish I could bet on it. Yeah, it's a fuck. Ronan, we have the set lines for Friday's case race, which I am.

Boys, I am jacked up. I'm yacked. I'm excited. I'm so excited. I have some wrinkles that I'd like to introduce. Please. Because my brain just goes to game. Wait, plus 1,300 now is the line for Ronan?

I think that people thought because I was being a little bitch that I'm a bitch. Who has the odds on the sheet? It's crazy. It's baloney. Because Ronan and I both party like fucking rock stars. Rock stars. Yes, we do. Party like some rock stars. I also am I'm nervous totally there's no way sass and I should be favorites yes we should all right KB Davey we're gonna destroy wrestle sass didn't fucking go to college

uh Dan it's been a while since you've been there the booth I'm worried about fucking Jay Fox made these lines these are trash i oh it is good he can he can put down nas yeah but it's all non-alcoholic that's gross i don't think he's ever put down that many non-alcoholic beers you can't i think like there's a point you're drunk where it's easier to drink that's what i was saying i was drunk i was saying to ron like from five to ten it's easier to drink and then it gets hard again. If you're just drinking non-alcoholic, it's like, this is gross. What are you going to say, Steven?

I made these lines. What the fuck, Jay? Fucking skewed. I don't think you should be the international date line. What do you have against Roan and I? I made you the favorite. Yeah, I don't know why. A lot of pressure.

I know why. You said you could do 12 beers in an hour. Yeah, that's crazy. I don't know why. He put a lot of pressure on me. I know why. You said you could do 12 beers in an hour. Yeah, that's crazy. I say crazy things sometimes. This is a joke show. Ken actually told me yesterday after the act that he's worried that it's only going to be like a 15 minute competition. Did you say that?

He thinks he might be able to put down all 24 in like 15 minutes. You guys know me. There's no one that misjudges yeah you do i'm gonna tell ron i'm doing a loner hand euchre you know me the there's no one who i was gonna say there's no one who misjudges like i'm the guy whenever we order something i order way too much i thought you were saying you could do no i've no i'm always i always misjudge eyes are bigger than you might be You might be. Always.

I was thinking about it last night. I was like, I think my strategy is I'm just going to chug eight beers in two minutes, and then I'll sip on the other four. It would be a hell of a lead. That's not possible. I think everyone's going to try and come out strong, and it's going to fuck everyone up. That's why if I was a betting man, I would sprinkle a little bit on Dana beers. Well, he's got to drink 24.

I know. 24 beers, Jay. 24. He's done it before. Yeah, but over the course of an entire night. Before two people could drink 12. So your understanding case, what's lost on you is race. Steven doesn't see race. So we have the

Oh, Steven, by the way way just a sidebar steven the hank text last night that obviously uh blew up the barstool world because he made me feel very uncomfortable in a very steven shea no one like him um hank is mortified everyone's clowning him hank sent me steven texted him on the side and he just goes bro you're doing f45 i did it and i got jacked that's steven's only takeaway from the whole experience nothing else he's just like oh sick dude f45 send me the updates my first thought is like what if i made that that's what you said no i didn't i said dude f45 is awesome i did it for a while and loved it. I didn't. I mean, I paraphrased, but it was the exact same thing. Okay.

Don't misrepresent him. My buddy was down. I wanted to send him a... I don't think that's what he was down about. What a workout. You can tell. He was down about sending it to the wrong people. Maybe the worst three people on earth to send something like that to, to mistakenly text someone, is me, Gaz, and Dave.

Fair. And Caleb was in there too, right? Caleb was in there too. Caleb actually gave Hank a heads up. Was like, hey, you did this by mistake. Dave just said to Hank, I promise I'll never speak of this moment. And then 60 seconds later, he's like, I tried, but I couldn't do it. That's the main reason I don't have Daveave's number so i can't accidentally do that even when you live with him

you didn't even didn't like tga accidentally text dave yeah like honey yeah like when steven texted the fucking bucks gm being like hey honey i'll be there in five minutes that's he did that. Yeah. Keep my side of the bed warm. Hey, honey, hope you're as wet as me. The TGA one was so funny. Yeah. I want to fight. Flight delayed to 945. Maybe I'll have a beer shrugging a movie.

Kissy face. Kissy face. Yeah. Yeah. And didn't Dave just reply like never text this number again? Oh, no. Flight delayed. Because he shouldn't have even been texting that to her. I'd probably be like, never text this number again. Oh, no. Because she shouldn't have even been texting that to her. No.

No. Too much information. Yeah. If you're sharing that information with your significant other via text, you have nothing to talk about in person. And then the relationship crumbles. Yeah. Broken up, actually. You're such a cynic.

It's disgusting. I'm just saying, don't text your girl. Some people like to share Their daily Routine But then you get home and you have a silent dinner Hell no Save it for the show

You gotta save stuff That's why the old life hack is If you're going out on a date With your significant other Do the movie first then the dinner after So you have something to talk about. A little trick for the youngins out there. That's the way to do it.

Talk about the movie. Smart. It seems like more of a pre-dating move. No. What are you talking about? Are you still scratching and clawing to make a conversation with your wife? Well, no, because we have kids now. Yeah, you don't.

Right, but there's definitely a gap where it's like, alright, what are we going to talk about? We live together. That's when you sit in silence comfortably. Or you could talk about the movie. Yeah. It's a cheat code. Or you save something like that you had beer at the airport. At 945. Yeah, you wouldn't believe it. My flight got

delayed. Oh, I'm sorry. No, it's okay. I had a beer. Oh, okay. You want to fuck? But instead, now they're sitting in silence. What am I supposed to say to that, I'm sorry. No, it's okay. I had a beer. Oh, okay. You want to fuck? But instead, now they're sitting in silence. What am I supposed to say to that, Andrew? Yeah. How do you want me to answer that, Andrew? How does she respond to that? Okay.

Okay. Like, dot, dot, dot, okay, question mark. Posting the show. That could just start an argument. Don't you think it's a bit early? You're lush. I'm sorry. Oh, have another one, you lush.

You crumb bum. You creep. Oh, there. Is this it? Creep. It's more than just what you said. Uber drive. Oh, the faces, too.

Stop texting me. 23 minutes to get through security? Where are they? Wait, there's someone else. Who was that? Oh, I don't know. Austin. Austin, yeah.

Austin, yeah. Brutal. I love how it says Dave Portnoy Barstool. Yeah. He couldn't remember what Dave Portnoy was from. Dave. That is it. Yeah, that's the best part.

Dave has my phone number saved as Big Cat New because of when he doxed me like nine years ago. Oh, really? It's my phone number. I had to get a new phone number. So I've been Big Cat New for nine years. I have people's names saved as something Barstool, but I can't imagine doing that for Dave. Yeah. Actually, when it's Dave Portnoy.

Yeah. Yeah, one or the other. Dave Barstool. That's brutal that Hank, though, got got by a six-year-old text thread. Who does that for saving it? Well, it's because he got a new phone. It, like, glitched. So it glitched.

And it was all, and if you look at when Gaz posted, it was clearly, we were all in San Francisco for the Super Bowl, drunk out of our minds at 3.30 in the morning, and that's when Caleb changed it to fam. Caleb likes to name a text group. I feel like that's his thing. I didn't even know you could name text groups back then. Oh, bro, you weren't naming text groups? I had a Windows phone.

And night fam. And I hit him with a one love. People were clowning on me. Oh, they should clown on you for one love. Why? Why? You never fucking loved your boys? Brother, I love you to death, but you ain't no Rasta. Oh, they should clown on you for one love. Why? Why? You never fucking loved your boys? Brother, I love you to death, but you ain't no Rasta. Oh, dude.

One love. Nah. That's 3.30 in the morning. That's a one love moment. One love? I'd throw out a one love. A 3.30 in the morning one love absolutely works. When you had a great night with your boys.

The sun can't be up when you send a one love as a one man. I think I know that night. We all fucking went out. We had a great night. We had a great dinner. Such a funny picture. One love. Check. A1 check. I wonder if he

hit day two or if this was enough. No, I think he's scarred for life. I did file an HR complaint. Did you actually? I went upstairs and I was like, who are all you people? And then I was like, where's HR? And they just pointed to a corner and there was a guy sitting at a desk. And I was like, hey, you HR?

He's like, kind of. I was like, all right, Hank harassed me. And he's like, okay. I was like, are you going to file this? He's like, it's filed. He just pushed aside the Stu's file and the Jerry file and peeped his head through. Stu, Jerry, and Rico is 99% of his business. it's an entire archival like it's a wing yeah i wonder if they they don't even teach that at hr school oh yeah i like stew he's gonna go back

and like give like some kind of like navy seals training for hr people you're gonna find like in the shit a textbook from 1950 that's like, all right, we've got to find a case study of publicly ranking the hotness of coworkers. We haven't seen this since John Williams back in 1949 at the marketing at the ad agency in Manhattan. That's how HR got invented. One love. One love. Thank you.

Thank you. They're from a different time zone. If you think one love is weird in that setting, then you got no boys. That's a fact. You got no boys. You have no friends, Nick. I throw out a one love here and there. Yeah, because you got friends.

I don't say I have no one love. Hello, friends. Look at that. Me and Sass, our team chemistry is off the charts. This is where we're going to crush on Thursday night. I am going to start sending you motivational things, by the way. I've been thinking about a lot. I saw a Duke fan on the street today. I almost knocked him over for you.

Fuck yes. Hell yeah. I saw a homeless person. I almost put him on an island for you. That would be awesome. Alright, do you want to hear my game, my rules? Yeah. So I was thinking about it. I think we should have as teams,

first of all, we're getting face painted, which is going to be incredible. Yeah. So we got that set. We have a comedian. Are we going to book it today? Oh, we need a comedian. Shit. Maybe we could call some up right now.

I can. I can call a comedian. Keep talking. I'll look for one. Okay. You call one. I'll call one. What other wrinkles? I'm going to beat a water I just left in here. I'm going to see. Why is You call one, I'll call one. What other wrinkles?

Look at the bead of water I just left in you. Alright, I'm gonna see if... Why is that so thick, dude? What the fuck? Dude, that looks like

fucking warm goo. Dude. Wait, that's a bead of water. What's the run, dude? That does look like goo. Look at it just jiggling there. Dude,

what the fuck? What's your dick like, homie? What are you into? It's the run, dude. All right, this sucks. What are you calling? Comedian? I'm calling a comedian.

He's not picking up. Which one is it? Bill Burr. Oh, shit. Dude. That's my Bill Burr impression. Shit. I was calling you, Sass. God damn it. Going to Utica, New York. Not on your Bill Burr impression. Shit. I was calling you, Seth.

God damn it. Going to Utica, New York. You're not on your phone on the show. First of all, that's not true. Never go on my phone. Look at that. Also, I have Big Cat muted. It's perfect.

Look at this bead, bro. Dude, she's been blowing you up. That is insane, that bead. Why is nothing happening to the bead? Anytime someone texts me one time, I reply and then I mute it instantly. I just don't want to see the reply. Why isn't it spreading out? Oh, suck up the bead.

I ain't sucking the bead. Snort it up your nose. Snort the bead. All right, so the rule I was thinking about was bead cam. Can you suck it up your butt and make it an anal bead? Is that bead going to pop at any point? No, just chill. Put that in a petri dish or something.

Yeah, that makes no sense. Someone just listening to this episode? Yeah. God, I wish I could see the bead. Oh, the bead. It's sick. Let me describe it real quick. I can only imagine what it looks like.

If there's any blind Yak fans, please call in using Siri, I'd imagine. It looks like a mancala beat. Using Bixby. Using Bixby. Tell us what your favorite episode is, because I'm curious. What's our most blind-friendly episode? That beat is just not going anywhere. Draft.

Pop it. Pop that beat. It's now driving me nuts. It's KB's beat. KB. Oh, it just did The yolk just broke Oh wow it did

Ew So I was thinking Okay yeah yeah For the case race Each team Gets one time out Where everyone has to stop drinking And that's

Time outs are the only times You can use the bathroom Oh fuck No Yeah Wait use the bathroom can we piss in here yeah okay fine that's a strategy me and nick don't mind pissing anywhere i mean if we can piss in here that's fine but i'm not gonna be able to drink 12 beers and not piss well you can use the timeout yeah but like once you pee once. That's a strategy. What about two timeouts? You want to do two timeouts, no peeing in here?

No, I'd rather do one timeout peeing in here. I want to make it as hard as it could possibly be for us so that the viewers enjoy it. Right, I want it to be a game of strength and determination and strategy. Is there any strategy to not peeing? No, but let's say somebody calls a timeout. The timeout means everyone has to stop drinking. Everybody can go pee. And everyone has to stop drinking.

Like, imagine if I call a timeout when you don't have to pee. That's bad news for you. You're going to go try to force out a pee, and it might be a poop. Or if you're like, I really have to pee, and everyone has their timeout, and everyone's like, I'm not going to use it to let him pee. Defense. Defense. Does every single person get a time out?

No, I think every team gets one time out. 24 beers, five pees? Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'm going to bring a piss bucket for myself. No, there's no peeing in here. I thought we just said there was peeing. No, I just ruined.

I just said no. What? Having to pee while you're drunk is like one of the worst feelings. When you really gotta go. It's part of the strategy. On the subway? I don't think about it. Oh, come on, dude.

Too soon. I walked on the subway today and I looked everybody in the face like I was fucking John Wick. Like I was gonna like... Is there anybody who wants to fucking start some shit? That shit was crazy. It's scary. Very scary. The guy's still out there. on wick like i was gonna like is there anybody who wants some fucking to start some shit that shit was crazy it's scary very scary the guy's still out there is he yeah they never they didn't arrest anybody yeah get him bad very bad michael gruens in the office yeah he is g where's he at lost like 120 pounds he looks really thin he looks. He had a tweet the other day. It was like, it was the worst depression I've ever been in my life, but I'm down 120 pounds.

Yeah. Like, oh, okay. He cartwheeled into the office and did a round off right in the atrium right here. It was sick. Right on his feet. Yeah, it was crazy. It was like a cheerleader, a male cheerleader. What are you scheming up over there?

Trying to find a comedian. On Craigslist? On a good one, but he didn't have his phone number. What's his name? Maybe we could put out the best joke yet. He's meta. What's his name? What drew you to his profile?

I just looked up comedian. Nice. Why did you say he's not a good one? He's trying to go on tour with someone who's famous. What's his name? Florentine? Yeah. He's too funny.

I want like a... Yeah, if we're having to hold in our piss and we have him, no chance. We might bust a gut. No chance, bro. We might literally bust our gut open. We might spontaneously combust. Comedian.

Yeah, this might be like that radio competition where the woman had to hold her pee to win a Nintendo Wii. She had to drink all that water, and she died. Oh, yeah, she drowned to death. Yeah. I remember that. Really? Yeah.

It's wild that you can drown to death by drinking. Shouldn't have told your teammate that. Your eyes got so big. Oh, fuck. We gotta, we gotta, listen. I mean, now we're gonna lose. No internet. You guys have seen when we do, like, episodes where we're drinking, I have to pee every five,

when we do live shows, I have to get up and pee in the middle of them just because you're anxious bladder boys moving up bladder ladder only you can change the rules so maybe we uh maybe two timeouts for us per person and everybody else has a handicap i'll figure out the timeout rule i think there should be a timeout rule though because it would be funny if there was, like, you can make everyone else stop for two minutes. What if I pee? What if you can get away with peeing in here and no one knows? That works.

Yeah. What if for one of your timeouts you have to be blindfolded and you have, like, one minute to get to the bathroom? You have one minute and you just have to go blindfolded. That's fucking great. No one's going to pee in the office, too. Yeah, no, it's probably better. I feel like you could say that for any episode. Right.

No one in this office. That's true. This show is basically all that happens in this office. Yeah. Oh, it's completely dead today. Every day. Yesterday was really dead, too. Every day.

The day before was really dead. I also like that you're saying this as part of the reason why it's been dead when you took your three months. I was gone and people decided not to come in anymore. They had no one to look to. Nobody to impress. Ibi, what are you doing? I'm looking for a performer. I'm trying to book one.

Why don't we look together on the screen? It sucks that we burned our performer. I found a Brooklyn face painter if we want to give him a call. Okay. I have a face painter. Steven's already done that. Already secured.

Are they good? Very highly reviewed. Oh, shit. Maybe we should add the... Can we add a face painter and a comedian to the case race? To have them...

Oh, they have to also do it? Yeah. Must be willing to booze with the fellas. Maybe Dana can offer them a beer. Yeah, Dana's allowed to give the face painter a beer. But he has to convince them on the spot to help him. He has to cajole them. You didn't get Lulu the clown, did you?

No, I stayed away from clowns. Yeah. The artiste. We've had a bad experience. People have been curious about what happened with that clown. No, I stayed away from clowns. Yeah. Artiste. We've had a bad experience. People have been curious about what happened with that clown. Has enough time passed? Kyle? Nothing happened.

Kyle, don't play. Should we get some gerbils and just have them run around? Or no, a rabbit. A rabbit. Because gerbils are a little bit creepy. They err on the side of mice. Richard Gere has kind of ruined gerbils for fun. Yeah, he has.

Hamsters, though. Hamsters still play. Hamsters bite. They do? I do like it when they do that little water ball. Oh, it beads. Yeah, it beads. The water beads.

Are we drinking hamster water? Maybe we should just do a beer out of a hamster dispenser. Yeah, one of the beers has to be. Okay, yeah, there will be a wheel for what one of your beers is dispensed out of. That would be kind of awesome. Yeah. Drinking a beer out of a hamster ball. Yeah, that would be awesome.

By the way, how was the frozen yogurt? Not the ones they roll in, like the things that are attached to the cage where they're like. Oh, oh. Yeah. How was the frozen yogurt? Did you eat it? I would love to see a hamster in a ball right now. Did you eat it, KB? Oh, no, no, no. It was great. No, he didn't. No, he didn't. He didn't eat yogurt? Did you eat it? I would love to see a hamster in a ball right now. Did you eat it, KB?

Oh, no. It was great. No, he didn't. No, he didn't. He didn't eat it, bro. So it was good. What the fuck? What did it taste like then?

Thanks for getting chocolate and strawberries. What did it taste like then? It tastes like a chocolate-covered strawberry. Fuck, he's good. He did have it. They were really good. It was awesome. It was fantastic.

I don't think he ate it. I solely couldn't decipher that Froyo is a portmanteau for frozen yogurt. He thinks everything's an acronym. My boys have portmanteau. I said it. He said it any minute. Listen, we never said Fasoli was the smartest. We've said he was the dumbest.

Yep. Yeah. That's exclusively what we said about him. We said that he's creepily won't stop smiling. I love him. He really is. I would trade everything to be him. He always looks like he farted in a yearbook picture or something like that.

He does. He's always looking like he farted in a yearbook. Those yearbook pictures where someone just farted. Oh, man. That's the number one guy. Number one guy. Is the case race going to be on the Yak channel? Oh, yeah.

So what's the deal with that? Why are we doing that? Well, we wanted to move to the Barstool Yak YouTube channel. Why? To grow that. I thought that was what everyone wanted. I do want to grow it, but I also, we do have a lot of people at the Barstool channel. It's a very.

But that's the thing. To get it from where we are currently to jumpstart it, it'll be good to have one rallying event that everyone's going to promote. Okay, all right. So that's good. So subscribe. We have a meeting tomorrow internally to decide what things we're going to need to do to move to there permanently. But Friday is a perfect day to actually have a test show and then see. So everyone subscribe to the Barstool Yak. We have the shows posted every day after they're live,

but Fridays will be premiering live from the Barstool Yak YouTube. Yes. I'll put the link in the chat. Hell yes, TJ. There goes my hero. I also have some cool news. We're getting a very unique gift set. Hold on.

This might not be cool. Yeah, I didn't know if it was going to be cool just by the way you said it. This is not going to be cool. Proceeding words. Hey, let's guess it first. We're getting a unique gift set. Hold on, this might not be cool. Yeah, I didn't know if it was going to be cool just by the way you said it. Yeah, this is not going to be cool. Proceeding words. Hey, let's guess it first. We're getting a unique gift. Is it a comedian? I'm sending to...

Oh, who's calling? What's the gift set that Shades think is cool? Probably some kind of YouTube fucking... It's football, sports. TV 12. It's related, yeah. Book. Yes, probably like a football with. It's probably related. Yeah. Book. Yes.

Probably like a football with like Tom Brady's like signature on it. Fake signature. Yeah. He said it was unique. Unique. Neat. Yeah. Maybe some kind of like apparel or something like that.

Like some type of sweatshirts that we're getting from someone or some shit like that. No. All right. I'm going to give my honest opinion on the cool news on a coolness factor. What do you think I'm going to say? I don't know. One to ten. Oh.

Probably low. Guess. I'll give you very obvious. 3.5. I'll be as very honest as I can. That's fair. So I'm going to tell it to you now? Yeah.

We're getting custom marbles sent to us. We couldn't have guessed worse. That was – That's a 3.5. Yeah. Might be a 3. What are custom – So we talked about it last week.

It was a show that Roan joined. That might be the lamest object to customize. I don't know, dude. You just walk around with some boys. You just play some marbles. How are they cat-eyed? Are they square? They're all custom.

All marbles are custom. Well, they're all, yeah, they're custom because they're given to us. You can't make factory. They have our faces on them? No, they're just regular marbles, but because they're given to us, they're custom. Not everyone gets. It's like a snowflake or a. Yes.

Not every marble is given specifically to us. Okay. That's big news. Huge. Yeah. Who's the marble plug? I'll text you guys. It's Jenna. That's big news. Huge. Yeah. Who's the marble plug? I'll text you guys. It's Jenna.

She's back. All right. It's pretty sick. But we were talking about how marbles get made and like some guy that is a fan of the act is a glass blower

and makes marbles. Why wouldn't we get a bong? Custom bongs with our faces mounted into them. A bong would be so much cooler than a marble. Yeah, there's a lot of things

you could do with glass right or like a gravy boat why don't we just get like an enormous bong his name is Devin shout out Devin shout out Devin

this marble is cool as fuck god damn it I like marbles this marble is it looks like a orb it's a cool marble yeah

alright Steven that's a 7 out of 10. Okay, fair. Good marble. But if it was a bong or something. Oh, wow, that actually is awesome. It's a very cool marble. It's a fucking, can you post the marble?

Yeah, I'm going to have to buy some sort of marble case so I can display this. That's sick. At your home. You guys ever watch the marble races on YouTube? Yes. Those are awesome. Yes. That's why we started it.

And then we started watching the How It's Made for marbles, which is like ASMR. Oh, really? It's extreme ASMR. Actually, we should put the marble in like a glass case, a floating glass case, and the marble floats in the case, and we put it in that room because we needed something to put on the walls in there and just get a marble that just floats on the walls. Zero gravity case. Yes.

Should we get a big-ass case for just a small-ass marble? Yes, that's what the fuck I'm talking about, dude. What are those things called? The ones where you... Flingshot? Flingshot, there it is. I thought you were talking about those ones where it's like the four.

Oh, those are awesome, too. Those clickety-clacks. I love those. CEOs' desks. Look at that marble, folks. Wow. What a marble. But it would be cool if it was a bong.

Or a bubbler. We could get a bong, too. I'm hyped for this. Or someone could choke on it. I'm the number one knick-knack guy. Yeah, you are. That is good. It's a great knick-knack.

Imagine the conversation piece that'll be. Oh, yeah. Is that a custom marble? Yup. There it is. That's the whole... All right, I'm out of here. We're all getting our own, so they'll all be marble? Yep. There it is. That's the whole. All right, I'm out of here.

We're all getting our own, so they'll all be one of one. Whoa. Damn. So Nick's going to have his own knick-knack? That's right. Custom knick-knack? Are they all the same size? What is that?

Thank you, TJ. This face painter is scamming Craigslist. What are you doing? Every ad is a different picture, a different price, and and a different title but it's all the same number i didn't even know craigslist still like existed should i call one so just a random person be like hey it's it's actually kb from craigslist probably remember me the i think the funniest thing this is insane why would they remember you one of the funnier things we ever did i think was when KB called the gym.

Yeah. In L.A. Oh yeah. That fucking destroyed me. That was one of our best things we didn't follow through on.

Oh you went. Supposedly. I did. I went. Yeah. But it was just so funny. Most embarrassing

thing is like I am at a point where I actually can do 80 for 10 to 12 without fail. You can do what? At the time when the joke, the onset of the joke, it was a joke. Now it's real.

Now I can't joke about it anymore. You can do what? He can incline press. You can do 80 for 10 to 12 reps. To failure? 10 to 12 not to failure. That's it? Failure is hard to define.

What? 80 total? 80 in HR. Oh, 80 in HR. That's it? Failure is hard to define. What? 80 total? 80 in each arm. Oh, 80 in each arm. That's crazy. I'd like to say that. That's impressive. 160 total.

I thought you were saying 40 in each hand. I'm like, dude, what? No. Yeah. Not quite. Not quite. Wait, wait. Two 40s in each hand.

Like Edward. That's nuts. Yeah. Let's talk about the one of one or the one of 250 coins. Oh, no, they're coming out. Yeah, those are also coming out. Finally, I feel pride for the first time.

We actually have done this because there's been a lot of like maybe a little scuttlebutt like, hey, these guys don't ever follow through on stuff. We do. It just takes a while. We have coins coming out. Season six.

There's 250 that are going to be on sale. You know how long it takes to make a coin yeah well it's well it's kind of me i did i was like slow on answering it's your coin guy yeah i was not i wasn't fast that's okay all right but what is there 250 of them 250 with certificates with your number with your number that's Yeah. That's a dope. And if you see any of us in the wild and you have the coin, it's automatic kiss on the lips. You redeem the coin. Kiss on the lips. You get a kiss.

Get one kiss on the lips. Well, no. You have to flip it in front of us and you call heads or tails. And we either fuck you or suck you. Tails, you kiss us. Yes. Kiss coin. It's our head or our tail.

It's a kiss coin. Boy, I hope this doesn't happen Oh it will happen I will kiss the man Do we want to show the Or woman Yeah show it Or woman

Or woman Yeah chicks only I don't think we're worried about Chicks buying I don't think any girls Are buying coins You guys have to kiss the dude If he shows

KB we're still gonna have Re-sell value Well not with Not with not with the kiss attached. Yeah. Because we'll know if you resell it. We'll know. Look at that. Look at us all sweating.

Jack, they made me look. We look awesome. We're not wet. We're just sweating. You look like we're having so much fun. Yeah. Just the guys. Just the dudes in the tub.

I love this crew. I have a band-aid on my big toe we should get a big tub i do we can all just sit in yeah that's like a like a classic uh new york style tub too it is that's what my tub looks like with the pad feet and these are metal coins don't get it twisted this ain't no plastic coin bullshit. Got enough microplastic. I feel like we're due for a shower, bath, technological advancement. Yep. It's been the same for so long. There has to be a way that we can make it better. I mean, shower heads are what they're doing.

I think shower heads should start evolving. They are, though. The experience, the bathtub should have some type of effect. Mist or the waves of... Jesus Christ. should start evolving. The experience, the bathtub should have some type of effect. Mist, or like the waves of, Jesus Christ, the way that

in Vegas there's the fountains spray up at different times you can kind of run through. Is that you mean something timed? Just something else.

It's been the same for so long. I don't think it has. I think for a long time it was nothing and now we got the bath, and then after that. On a grand scale, yeah, but it's been how many years? When did we get the shower?

When did the shower become ubiquitous? The shower was probably, what, in the 40s, 50s? Don't get me started on history. I have no idea. No way is it way before. I would guess 1910. 1910? Showers?

I don't know, dude. I'm going to go like 18. Yeah, when did showers? 78. 1760. What? Oh, but when were they in the tree? When were they household? That's literally just someone that accidentally got rained on.

Showers are older than America? No. Ain't no way. We're the only country. George Washington was showering? No. Uh-uh. Because Taft was still bathing. Washington was showering? No. Uh-uh. Because Taft was still bathing.

Did someone say 1940? Yeah, I did. No, and I would have been like, oh, that sounds old. Yeah. I would guess. I'm talking about every, like. When was it a house having a shower? Yeah.

A jello mold. Yeah. Well, when were houses like buying ice? There was the ice cube. It was the ice box before the fridge, right? That was in the 30s or 40s, I want say that's way different technology than shower i don't know man it's pressurized plumbing versus uh like uh electric cooling i read an article that was like essentially the air conditioning ruined society because not because of the ozone but

because quite let it save humanity it used to be in the summers. What a twist. People would go outside and enjoy the parks and do things, and now people just stay inside. Imagine being the dickhead who wrote an op-ed on anti-AC. But they also were wearing, the people were wearing 18 layers. Everything was wool. Yeah, wool with a wooden structure around their waist or some shit like that. They were wearing the heaviest and thickest things out. What's the least remarkable thing that we do that would blow someone's mind in 1910?

If you walked up to someone in 1910 with Gore-Tex. Like electric toothbrush. Yeah, or sneakers. What would be the thing That would blow them That's what Jumanji's based on Yeah true Like a sneaker What the fuck

Yeah like holy fuck You can tie those Or the cheapest thing Yeah Contacts Or like the camera Ooh contacts is a good answer No that'd be

That's witchcraft Yeah They put it in their eyes Yes Yeah that would be like Holy shit The camera on a cell phone That's like ten dollars

And it's like Cell phone Yeah a toothbrush I wonder Yeah when do they have toothbrushes Yeah, that would be like, holy shit. A camera on a cell phone? That's like $10. A cell phone? Yeah, a toothbrush. Yeah, when do they have toothbrushes? That like cool S. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Yes. Burn him. I'd love to take a pilgrim on like a pitfall at an amusement park. Yeah, that would be good. What's a pitfall? It's a demon drop. And it just drops you. They wouldn't like that one bit. I's the demon drop. And it just drops you. They wouldn't like that one bit.

I think they'd die. I think there would be a lot of things that could just instantly kill a pilgrim. Like a Mountain Dew. But I think that, don't they say that if we got dropped off at like 2000? I think it's the opposite, yeah. Like they survived like what they did. Right, they would, I don't need that. Right, but if I'm putting an Oculus on them and throwing them in POV porn,

they're going to get a nosebleed and die. Yes. A aneurysm. No, but they would get a nosebleed and die then, and then you would just give them a small antibiotic, and they'd be so fine that they wouldn't even realize how sweet it was. They'd get anxiety over it,

and then a small drug would make it all go away. You could like Advil for someone in 1900 with like Oxy. Probably, yeah. The great Advil. Although, not really because weren't they just taking like opium? Yeah, I think so.

Yeah, right. They'd just be like, no, let's just take let's just actually take heroin to fix it. Over the counter, yeah. Or just eating poppy seeds like bamboo shoots. Yeah, just chewing on poppy seeds. Should we spin the wheel real quick? Probably should.

We've got to start doing this earlier, because what happens if it's wet? Don't even say that. Oh, gee, it's huge. That is the biggest green sliver. No, no, blue sliver. Oh, shit. It's huge. That is the biggest green sliver. No, no. Blue sliver. Oh, shit. You're a green-blue colorblind.

Wow. Hit it long enough, Nick. Do it. No, no. Don't do it when it's that close to wet. Do you think it matters? Yeah. Yeah.

Big time. Right now it's perfect. I don't like this. Ugh. Nick didn't like it. Oh, no. Oh. Okay, okay, it. Oh, no.

It's over. Okay, okay. Are you fucking kidding me? God damn it. I woke up with a tender ass face. Let's fucking go. I was feeling nice and comfortable. Slap wheel.

Slap wheel. God damn it. All right. I don't know how this works. It's a bracket system, and we spin the wheel based on the bracket. We've got to build the bracket. No Brandon, no Owen, no. No, it's everyone in it.

Everyone's in it. Should we get a woman? No, do we have an odd number of people? So mad. No, we have eight. Yeah. I would like to bring in a guest, if they so choose. You want to add someone to the bracket?

One, two, three, four, five. Yeah, we need five. We need eight. No, the booth. Yeah, the booth. Steven's out there. He has no idea what this bowl is. He's standing under the internet again. Yeah, he knows the lighting over there gives him the biggest, fattest dick.

Yep. I want someone with nothing to lose or something to prove. Can you build a bracket on the computer, TJ? Yeah. So it's just a simple final. It's a lead eight. Can you build a bracket on the computer, TJ? So it's just a simple final. It's a lead eight. Just like normal, his ass goes in. His dick goes out.

What's he doing, grinding? Don't put the names in. Look at his ass going in. Oh, this is deja vu. Do you want me to grab the whiteboard? How about that baseball player's ass? Would that be easier? That was crazy. That was a fat ass, but that. I know where it is. It's in the kitchen.

Ron, did you say... Last time, I think you compared it to a steel drum. Nah, you want to tell Steven you have the whiteboard? Yeah. Some island music on there. So wait, how does this work? Are we trying to hurt each other? Yeah. Yeah. No, no, no. We're pulling it, though. We're not, like, trying to

go all out slap, though. We're following through. We're going for noise. I want a wild card in here who will... Gruen? Has anyone gone? I think Gruen left. Yeah, the problem is... Gruen didn't leave.

He's in New York now. True. There's one champion, so there's one person who might not get slapped. Oh, fuck. Yeah. It's kind of thrilling. Yeah. Without Brandon in here

I mean Brandon Brandon was palming us Really? And he took And he handled it the worst When it was his time to get slapped He was like very upset I don't think we should do that anymore

Two minutes earlier He was like Drunk with power Yeah just like fucking He had a bloodlust Yeah Smoking us with his big meat paws The quigs video was crazy. How did head? I don't know

He was doing these sick-ass graphics for us The beer can one of a team a whole team you say bacon or beer Karen's Your can sounds like you said bacon really like an Like an accent. All right, do we have a pen? Oh, yeah, we do. Isn't it like in Jamaica? Yeah, it's beer can. Beer can. Beer can. There's one with Boston.

Beer can. It's an English accent bacon. This was on E-Bomb's World. Beer can. Beer can. Beer can. Beer can. Beer can.

Beer can and bacon. Craig Robinson? Yeah No way God I'm so jaded And I'm the one that jaded you Jaded Turn me on like a light switch

I'm moving your body around and around Chill bro do not poof Does he carve that eyebrow thing in, or is that a scar? It's a scar from a dog bite when he was a child. Lucky. Didn't you meet poof? Yeah. Wasn't he bragging about his sex life?

What happened? He was bragging. You swear to tell the poof the whole poof and nothing but the poof? I do. He was talking to me and three Backstreet Boys about how much pussy he gets. There's three. Howie? I forget which three. There's three. Howie? I forget which three.

He definitely does. Howie gets the most pussy. But even the Backstreet Boys had obviously just come off of the greatest 20-year pussy run of all time. Because that was before the internet. You made me realize how sweet, dude. They were probably on a grand run. But they weren't that impressed. They were looking,

they were exchanging sideways glances, being like mildly polite about it. It's the Backstreet Boys. You were impressed. I was like, what, dude? You did what? No way. With how many? What was it like?

What did it taste like? Meanwhile, Kevin and his big ass eyebrows bored to death. He didn't give a fuck. Hanson Trio. I respect those guys so much. Why? They did the show too, honestly.

They were the original Justin Bieber. They came up as like the... No, but they were a little one hit wonder. And they got destroyed despite their success. Now they're just chilling doing charity work in Tulsa. But they had a Cribs episode like pretty long after their success, and they look like, or they were like living on like the Upper West Side or some shit. Hanson Brothers?

Yeah. They're all married. They're in Oklahoma. Yeah, they're pious. No, I'm saying when they had their Cribs episode. Yeah, they had lots of kids. Don't act like I have it twisted because I don't have it twisted. Cribs never showcased Upper West Sides.

Stop, bro. Pull up their fucking pull up the Hanson Brothers Cribs episode right now. Did they? I'm not fucking misremembering this. I don't like how dark it is in here. Set up the wheel. I'm making my eyes dry. Yeah, me too. Has it been making your eyes dry too? I think it's just allergies.

Oh, I think it's the light. The fact that these lights hit harder now because everything else is washed out. They're adding more lights? Also, you guys didn't see it, but if you look at the bottom of your chairs, every one of your chairs was moved off the blocks because they arranged it in a certain way. But all of your knees would have literally been touching each other. So I moved the chairs back. This was a Loud Sean production. Now Loud Sean is not here anymore.

Last hurrah. Oh, yeah. And it was, and there's an article, there's like a Yahoo article about Loud Sean today. What? Like a Yahoo Finance article about the new position that he's taking. And it's like Loud Sean oversaw 100 billion views a month. What?

Like what? Can anybody just claim that? Yeah, he can. He's loud Sean. Can you imagine what you can say you oversaw? Everything. A trillion views a month. Literally. Alright, let's go. Let's spin the wheel. We're not by Craig Robinson interviews at 215.

Whoops. We gotta get to slapping. Yeah, we gotta get to slapping. We need to get the box back in here so we have something to slap. Craig want to hit one of us? Slap. Oh, maybe he'll slap one of us as the finale. This is for the one seed. Sash, you're nervous.

I love this. One seed got upset last time, though. Yeah, the one seed did get, oh, shit. Ch-ch-chated. And then go for two is the next. So who doesn't have to slap? It's 1-8-5-4-3-6-7-2. Or the winner doesn't have to slap? It's 1-8-5-4-3-6-7-2 Or the winner doesn't have to slap

Did Frank Lloyd Wright have like hoes? No No, yes he did I think back then architects were like No, he attached all the furniture to the walls So there was no He loved order He wasn't going to fuck on anything

You don't think he fucked at away games? He was eccentric. He definitely fucked. No, he did not. I guarantee you he fucked more than any. You can't fuck when there's a waterfall going through your house. It's distracting. I guarantee you he fucked more than any one of his time.

Frank Lloyd Wright. I bet you. I'm with no swag on this one. Let's see it in my eye. Four? Same as last time. I don't know. And who am I? Four? Same as last time. What up? I don't know. You go five. Who am I slapping? Or, well,

who am I up against? Fuck. Oh, wow. Yo! A house divided cannot stand, my bros. Why? Because we're lower seed. That means that we have to get slapped multiple times.

No, you're really only going to get slapped once. Yeah. Because if you lose, you get slapped. Wait, I thought we did it for the last person. It was like, if you get it, you're out. No, you only get slapped once. There's one person who won't get slapped at all. Oh, 4-5 is not 50-50. Yeah, it is.

Say what? Yeah. It's 45-55. That was 45-55., 4'5 is not 50-50. Yeah, it is. Say what? Yeah. It's 45-55. I thought it was 45-55. Wait. All right, 50-50. What the hell? True anus.

If you Google image Frank Lloyd Wright, it's just his buildings. No pictures of him. I mean, he's a fucking awesome architect. Who just built shit. He went off in like Highland Park, Illinois. Yeah. Dude, Falling Water is the musty-ass house. Fayette County.

Fucking crushed. You can't fuck when it's musty in your house. I don't know. Stained glass should be more prevalent. The separation between him and the next best house designer is so massive. I don't know if there's a bigger gap as far as fame. Oh, my god, Nick. He had four wives. His latest was Olga Lozovich, so you know she was a model.

The guy fucked. Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Eight children? Have you ever been to a Frank Lloyd Wright home? No, they got progressively more. It was musty. It made me horny. It was cold. You couldn't get comfortable. I'm not fucking on anything in there.

I can damn tell you that. He can damn tell you. He can damn tell you. He'll damn tell you that right now. Elon Musk should buy all the Frank Lloyd Wrights and just tear them all down. That would be such a great troll. That would be hilarious. He just starts ruining all of history.

People would be furious. Like, well, did you ever go? Yeah. Well, no, but. Yeah. The same people who are like, who even cares about statues? They'd be like, well, who even cares about houses? Pro tip, if you do go to the Falling Waters exhibit, they have natural water slides, which are a real blast.

That is cool. He buys Yosemite and makes it a Tesla plant. Yeah. He should just troll. The geysers are actually perfect. Yeah. Hydraulic hyperbaric chambers. One of my good friends is one of the few people that are born and from Yosemite.

Dad was a... Casey. Casey Hancock. He had a... What a family. His dad has one hand. And what did he drive? A hearse.

His name's Hancock? Yeah. He drove a hearse. I've already driven a hearse. I'm trying to figure this out. This fake His name's Hancock? Yeah I've already Changed this out This fake story Dan Hancock It's 100% real

Yeah Casey they were born in Yosemite His dad was like a Like a Like a What do you call the people That work in national parks? Did you guys not have this

On the script? It's true He didn't work in a funeral But he did drive a hearse No this is the part That says improv Not improv You feel me?

You're so good at it They they're improv-ing mistakes. They wouldn't be good at it. What's that? It's us sharing a common memory. Casey Hancock. How often did he go to Melty's? Never been to Melty's. That's fake.

Melty's is fake. Casey Hancock's real from Yosemite. Dad, one hand. Mom's deaf. See how hard that sentence is? His mom. Their doorbell was a strobe light. My sister is a deaf educator.

She would come over. They would call. I forget the process of communicating via phone. Their doorbell was a strobe light. Yes, it was. I would hate sleeping over there because they would only let you have one pop. If you had more than one pop, you had to pay a dollar at sleepover. Page from Borelli's book.

Spin this fucking wheel. Oh, man. Somebody please prove us right. All right, let's slap each other. Yeah, let's slap the fuck out of each other. Let's go hard. Oh, there we go. We got that.

Perfect bracket gets... What are the numbers? Oh, yeah. Someone's got to pick a got that. It's all nice. Perfect bracket gets. What are the numbers? Oh, yeah. Someone's got to pick a perfect bracket. Fill out your brackets. So the numbers are on the first round, there's actually, like being the one seed is a benefit in the first round. So there'll be eight spots for Che.

Or sorry, eight spots for. Yeah, eight spots for Che and two spots for Zha on the wheel. I thought it was like 70. No, it's 80, 20, 70,30, 60-40, 50-50. Okay. Damn. We ready to go? Che and Zha?

Can I forfeit and do 50-50? What? All right. No, you're the one seat. I know. But what? Why don't you want to slap Zha? He's got a meeting.

No, I don't want to slap Zha. All right, come in here, boys. Both of you guys come in here. One of you is getting slapped. One of you fellas is getting slapped. Saw didn't participate the last time, I don't think. I don't think he did. I don't think he was here.

All right, spin it, TJ. Oh, man, Ronan Sass is a great matchup. Oh, yeah. That's Duke Carolina. I'm going to point out that these are the two minorities on the show. Yep. And we're gathered around them. Yep.

I feel like Leonardo DiCaprio. All right. So if it lands on you, you win. If it lands on you, you slap. Yeah. If it lands on Che, he slaps you. If it lands on you, you slap. Yeah, if it lands on Che, he slaps you. If it lands on you, you slap him. And if he half-ass slaps you, you get to slap him back.

You've had an upset in the first round before! Oh, my days! Oh, my days! Oh, my God, it's happening again. You've never had a one-seed win the first round. No, he was the upset. He was the eight. I was the one seed last time.

Yeah. We've never had a one seed win the first round. All right, slap the fuck out of him, Zah. Wait, grab the mic. There should be a table, right? A separator? We need the mic to pick up the slap. malzahar dong versus robert mugabe what are the rules of slapping

what the fuck kb all right so you got to go yeah all right get a little lower steven sat the fuck out of him, Zahn. Slap the shit out of him, Zahn. Dude. Wait, wait. Angle. Hold on. Angle over.

Zahn, take it to the right. Or no, no. The other way. This way. Rotate both of you this way. Yeah. The other way. Yeah.

Okay, that's good, I guess. I think the other way. DJ, where should they go? Move that board back towards the glass. Move that board back towards the glass. Move the board back towards the glass. There we go. All right. You in here?

I think so. I'm sure that works. Hands on the knees. Oh, I'm so sorry. You're good. No, Zah. Get him. Slap the fuck out of him, Zah.

Oh, no, no, no, no. That's part of the game. No, that's part of the game. No, that's cool as that. That wasn't bad. No more. It's hard to do the first one. It is hard to do the first one. Slap the fuck out of him.

He's kind of red, though. Slap the shit out of him, dude. Slap him. That was good, Zaha. Hell yeah. This is based off more technique than it is pain. Yeah. Dude, this really is a cathartic thing that we do.

It feels like we're men again. Well done, Zaha. Well done is pain. Yeah. Dude, this really is a cathartic thing that we do. It feels like we're men again. Well done, Za. Well done, Steven. All right. Za moves on. Roan Sass, next matchup. Oh, it feels good. Like I said, it's like that short story, The Lottery, where they stone someone to death once a year.

Yes. This feels like it cleanses us. Wait, so I got to go back and watch the episode. We get to crack each other in the face once every month and a half. So was Brandon just full of – Oh, he was bombing us. But I saw the video of KB basically running start. KB struggled with how to slap.

I was like 0 for 5. You know how. He did several bad ones. His first one on me sucked so bad I made him go again. Yeah. Let's just finish it. All right, Ronan Sass. It's cloudy day, you're stealing me.

39 day. 30, 39 day. What are the odds? I tried to watch it. 70. 70, 30, 70 for Ronan. You didn't like it? You made it three minutes.

Such a good movie. 39 day, 39 day. Could we have another upset? Could we have another upset? Could we have another upset? I don't really know if I want to win because I just want

to get it over with. No, you want to win, bro. Because if you win, you never get slapped. You could never get slapped. If you win, you just can coast through life.

And it's fun to just be 39 Day. 30, 39 Day. 39 Day. You guys hip to that Soya Unico song? Yes. Love it. All my playlists.

Don't like this color palette. The worst sour gummy worm. It is the worst sour gummy worm. Yep. All right, here we go. The day is killing me. Is that your phone? Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Another upset. No one has a perfect bracket right now. Oh my god! Another upset! No one has a perfect bracket right now. There ain't no way. No chance. You're smiling, but this means you're going to move on. My ESPN notification was about Penn State having another sexual... Oh, I read the story today.

It was horrific. Really? It's like they had a player in the 70s who was like a violent rapist that's so dope how they do that thon charity event though i love how they raise all that money so you're being sarcastic so you actually don't like how they raise money for kids with cancer is it that maybe it wasn't part of your tour there? That was a little Tay tour. A little Tay tour. I put one of her stops at the Phi Psi house, and the Phi Psi boys were very pissed. All right, go ahead, Sass.

Slap the fuck out of this kid. I don't want to hurt my co-host. No, you do. It's cloudy. I think we decided if there's a 10 out of 10 slap, it's like a 7.5 is what you should be going for. So not hurt, but a good crack. If you don't slap me right, I'm getting slapped again. Yeah, it's a good crack.

It's not all the way. Bro, who zoomed on my ass? Your ass. Probably backwards hat run. Yeah, I'd say so. Step to your left. Someone tell him. Step to your left. Stage right. Left. Step to your so. Sass, step to your left. Someone tell him. Sass, step to your left.

Stage right. Left. Step to your left, Sass. He didn't. What are you doing? He can't hear us either, I guess. He didn't do that. Where should he go?

Where should he go? Step to your left. Left, left, a little more, Sass. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you going to go a 10 out of 10? No, I was joking. He was kidding. He was fibbing. Okay, is this yeah, yeah. Are you going to go a 10 out of 10? No, I was joking. He was kidding. He was fibbing.

Okay, is this good? Yeah. Bad. That was bad. I mean, it was good, but you didn't follow through. Just do it again. Oh, come on. Just slap him.

That's a good slap. That's a good slap. That was a great slap. That was both of you. Just falling right through his face. Rowan's got strong a great slap. Stop it. It was both of you. Just falling right through his face. Rowan's got strong cheeks, though. I feel like that didn't hurt you at all.

He did have a strong jaw. Got iron jaws in this show. Your face is red, though. Oh, yeah. Oh, I fucked your ass up. He's embarrassed. You cracked him. You cracked him. A guy like you hit him.

It's on a mark. He's embarrassed. All right. I'm blushing. Next. TJ, myself, 60-40. TJ, you got six. I got four.

Can the upsets continue? I think that might have hurt my hand. Of course you'd say that. Scratching across Roan's beard. Of course you'd say that. More than it hurt his face. Oh, your beard is way too itchy. That's sharp-ass hair.

I can't believe I just slapped so many people today. Your mustache hurts. Your mustache must ache. Spelled the same. All right. I would work better textually. Text battle type shit. Is your mom going to get mad if I slap you?

Oh, yeah. I definitely don't want to slap you. Why? I don't know. Yeah. I do know where HR is now. That's good. We did not sign anything is now. Yeah, that's good. We did not sign anything this time.

This is a good color. Oh, Sass has never signed anything. We could sue him. Yeah, we could. We could sue his fuck out of here. What the hell did you guys sign? Actual waiver from legal. Steven Shea got like actual legal to write a waiver for us.

Man. That means that I could sue if I get hit. Yeah, true. He's now worried. I mean, you hit get hit Yeah true He's now worried I mean you hit first Yeah that's true That's true you've already hit Rollins doesn't make a right Alright spin it TJ

I don't want to slap you bro I love you too much Thanks man I don't want to slap your ass No way Oh it's going it's going Big Cat you can like fire him pretty easily I don't want to slap your ass. No way. Oh, it's going. It's going. Okay. Big Cat, you can fire him pretty easily, right?

Fire his ass. Fire his ass. Bro. Bro. Don't even manifest that. I'll manifest that. You know how good I am at manifesting? Oh, my man, he's come true.

He was just giving fist bumps, like, go get him. Like, he was coming out to the bullpen. Where am I standing? Enter Sandman. Ba-na-ba-na-na. Da-da-na-na. All right, hold up. Line up first.

Yeah, that's a good angle. Big cat square to him a little bit more. Yeah, like that, like that. You're giving a strong face. He's giving face. Crinkly. Oh! Oh! High on the skull.

Oh! That was good. That was good. You should be slapped by a man. Oh, yeah. That one sounded like it hurt. If I was Chris Rock, I would have thanked Will Smith. That didn't even

sound like a slap. That sounded like a thud. It kind of caught my upper cheekbone. Yeah. I felt good. You were giving him a lot of cheekbone, though.

I was. I was letting him take all the cheek. Yeah. Now, here it is. I'm glad this is the last one because this is

the marquee matchup of the first round. This is the one that's going to break up the show. Will. Nah. Nah. Who are we rooting for? I think we're rooting for Nick.

KB can't slap. You can't slap. You got that Kiki palm. You got that Disney ass slap. KB can't slap now. Kila in the KB. He's got the Arnold palm, dude. He's got the fucking heavy one.. He's a fucking heavy one.

It feels like a five iron. Spin that thing. It's five five, dude. I like that song that they put behind the last slap montage. Was this past Sunday Palm Sunday? Yes.

I think it's the next one, right? Palm Tuesday right now. Come on, dog. What do you know about the triduum,, right? Tuesday right now. Come on, dog. What do you know about the triduum, my boy? Here we go. This is now 50-50 the rest of the way, TJ. So you don't have to re-change every wheel. I just love slapping my boys.

Yeah. Slapping. It feels good. It feels good to get slapped. I got to go home tonight and practice on my son. I felt it in my balls. You should have him practice on you. Shit.

Damn. Get your tolerance up. He actually did slap me the other day. Did you raise your voice? He's at military school now. Yeah. He was sent away. There will be blood. You raise your voice. Hey! He's at military school now. Yeah. He was sent away.

He's in a Gwong. There will be blood. All right, here we go. Free Earl. Oh! Let's go. Give me that face, bitch. Slap the fuck out of him, Nick.

Yes, sir. Slap the fuck out of this kid. Get him. Hold up. Square up. I tried to start a text conversation with you last night. You just sent a picture of him, Nick. Yes, sir. Slap the fuck out of this kid. Adam, hold up. Square up. I tried to start a text conversation with you last night. You just sent a picture of a gun pointed at me. Oh, Nick, here's the thing about KB. I don't think you know this.

He hates all of us. Yeah. All of us. So this is not just for you. Except for Owen and Brandon. It's for all of us. Oh, wait, no, no, no. Square up, square up, square up. Get the angle.

Get the angle. No, no, no, no, no. Square up, square up, square up. Get the angle, get the angle. No, no, no, no, no. A little bit more to your right, Nick. Yeah. Oh! That was good. Perfect form. Great follow-through.

That was perfect form all around. So now is it TJ Zah or is it Sass Nick? Thanks for giving me the job, man. Sass. Yeah, Sass Nick. Who wants to go first? Is it too hard? Let's go Sass Nick.

That was perfect. Sass Nick for the final. It was still gay somehow. Oh, very. Yeah, I went limp. Extremely. I could feel that it was a hard slap, but it just... I think my hand went so fast it kind of sounded like a lisp.

Oh, I have it. Alright, Sass versus Nick. That was my first slap on the show. That was exhilarating. Did it feel good? It feels way better to slap than to be slapped. Yeah, naturally. Gave me that condensed font on the bracket.

God damn. Oh, 50-50 like that? I liked the more, yeah, I liked the more, but whatever. We don't have to do that. Whatever, though. This is how the sausage is made? Wow. Behind the curtain.

Here we go. Nick. She looks like a sorbet. Oh, fuck. Give me good. Happy birthday, kids. Write your name up there, son. What song is that?

I want to listen to it. It's like a Pharrell song. Yeah. He just writes songs for commercials now. And TikToks. Rotate to the right, Sass. Right. A little more.

Yeah, like that. Oh, no. Don't give him that sexy side eye. I don't want to make a dimple because I don't want to sound like I go... I wish you had your glasses on for this. Oh, that was weak. That was weak.

That was like a James Bond slap. That was weak. That was weak. You got to do another one. Oh, those are both weak. That's all right. Yeah, that counts. Mm-hmm.

Just remember. You guys, if I was bleeding? You were looking at your hand like DJ and Zaha, get in here, boys. You slapped like a 90-pound woman who's slapping a man being like, get away from me. You should have seen the eyes he was giving me.

A little puppy dog. He couldn't do a thing. All right, DJ and Zaha for the other side of the bracket. We're going to do it in here. Oh, okay, nice. I like it. What happened? We're going to do it in here. Oh, okay, nice. I like it. What happened? We're going to do it right there.

They're going to spin and slap. Yeah, boot slap. Never been done. So does that mean Sash might have to have an away game? Oh, come on. If the higher seed wins. Yeah, our man is behind enemy lines. Unless it's Zha.

If Zha wins, then he has to come in here. Nope, Zha won. Sheesh. Enemy lines. Unless it's Za. If Za wins, then he has to come in here. Nope. Za won. Sheesh. Give him a slap and a meander in here, brother. They don't want to slap each other at all now. They love each other. I'm happy I'm not getting TJ.

My brother right here. TJ knocked my glasses off last time. Slap that I heard with Big Head. I'm so sorry. Oh, stop, boys. I'm tired of the pacifists in the fucking booth. No bitch shit. No.

Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no, no. One more of those, you got to get slapped. This show just disappoints me with the slap. I want TJ to do like eight rotations on the chair he gets hit so hard. Slap him. Slap him. Slap him, Zop.

Make him mad. Yeah! Alright, a little better. Alright, the final. You look swollen as fuck. I really knocked your block off, yeah. Let me see it, KB. Oh! That was a good slap. Bro, you look botched.

You should do punch wheel. I look like a common stock bitch. That's how Houdini died. Right in your fucking nose. Gut punch wheel. Yeah, bloody nose wheel. You've got to make the other person nose bleed. I just call it my connect.

I'm for Tuscan leather. It's me and Zaha. It's Zaha against Harry. Come on, boys. Don't ruin this. Who? Go all out. One of you.

Come on. Yes. We need the winner to really go for it. What if we get slap wheel on case race night? So be it. Are we going to spin every hour? Yes. Yeah. Are we doing a wheel reset for that? No, I don't think so.

Not unless we land on a wheel reset. Yeah. Makes sense. Yeah, I guess. I feel like nobody has the perfect bracket. No one. Time stamps. Need time stamps. It's unprecedented. I don't know. No chance. There was that person yesterday that predicted that the wheel would land on food and it would be

KB. Yeah, that guy feels like it. This is seven versus zero followers. This is mathematically the least possible. Least likely. It's a seven versus eight. Yeah, it's true. This is like, um... Unlike anything. Good luck with your metaphor boss

Yeah shit Alright boys Alright spin that shit We're all rooting for Zah right He was the driest And now he goes the unslapped Zah you need to crack The fuck out of Sass

Zah I want you to have like a long title To your name Zah the dri need to crack the fuck out of Zah. Zah, I want you to have a long title to your name. Zah the Dryest, the Unslapped. He needs to win more things. Am I going in there or is Zah coming in here? I'm happy for my boy Zah. I am too. Wait, Zah, I've seen you swing a golf club before. Get those feet loose, you know what I mean?

I can swing at a golf ball, not in person. Get him, Zog. Same type of shit. Same vibe. Slap the fuck out of this kid. Though I would love the visual of Zog getting slapped. Roll through. To your right a little bit. Make sure when you slap, you actually slap through his face. Yeah, that's nice. Get on your knees like a decapitee.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hands behind your back. Now really slap him. Slap the fuck out of him. Right through his face. With your back. Now really slap him. Slap the fuck out of him. Right through his face. With your hips. Open your hips up. Step back.

No, Zat, step back and show us what you're going to do. Give us a practice one. Yeah, do a practice one. Wait, does Championship Brown backhand? Bam! Yes! Yes! Wait, Championship Brown should be backhand. Pork.

Yes. If you move, Zat, then you have to get slapped again. Can I point out, these are the only two that didn't participate last time. Wait, wait, wait you if you move sass then you have to get stopped again Can I point out these are the only two that didn't participate? Rotate over your left Does I step to your right box? Yeah? Close to the box the black box this one right here Well again more for some of the slot We got to be able to see it though. This is good

Yeah, really force on the slap. We gotta be able to see it, though. Is this good? Really? Zah. Fucking right through him. This is how they treat depressed people in Zimbabwe. No! Alright, alright, Zah. Now you move your knees over this way, and Zah, you fully, no, and then swing your feet towards me. Zah, did that hurt at all?

No. And now, Zah, come across. Come all the way across his face. Give us another practice swing. A real one. Oh, blown. Across. All the way across. Move that way. There we go. That's good. Get your hips up.

Damn! Damn! The driest. The unslapped. The slap is just a funny thing God damn Ears ringing after that one It's like a cup of coffee

Yeah, no, it's not that bad Anyone want to go one more with me? Before I leave? Just a one-on-one? You want to do it? One-on-one? How do you do it? Just one-on-one I don't know, you kind of

I'm going to slap someone. All right, spin to see who Big Cat's slapping. I'm not going to sign up. Let's not do any... Let's do an Oklahoma drill. All right, that was good. Slap wheel. And get ready for Friday.

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Bye. Bye. Bye. It's the act. It's the act. It's your draw. It's the act. It's the act. It's the act. It's the act.

It's the act. It's the act. One love. For those that are asking, we're recording a regular episode Thursday. Live episode Thursday. Then the case race Thursday night. See you then. It's up to the act.