The Yak - The Swirly Wheel Is Upon Us And It Is Glorious | The Yak 4-27-22

Episode Date: April 28, 2022

Nick is screwedYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Hello. Alright, the big three. So, first day commuting from Chicago. Flight wasn't that bad this morning. Good. Man, are my arms tired.

I fucked that joke up. You got your garage set up yet? I flew, what is it? I flew in from Chicago. Man, are my arms tired. I had some guy tweet me today. He's like, I haven't listened to Dave Portnoy's show yet. And then listed all the worst possible scenarios.

He's like, thank you. I appreciate that. What's up, boys? This is the first time we've ever had this trio. Is it? I think so. This has to be the first time. I think this might have existed. I think we've done this before. This exact trio has never happened. We've had a lot of

trios. I've never been just the three of us. No, it has. No. It might not have. I don't know. You got a Yak historian on the case, please. DJ? Our in-house Yak historian. Hey, what's up ron is out today dl he'll be back tomorrow i'm gonna be out tomorrow hopefully he'll be back hopefully

he'll be back yeah tomorrow might just be you two and frank i'll be back on friday i'll be here tomorrow night for the draft i welcome that i have uh i guess kovitz back it's a thing now oh yeah is that what he has no i don't think so but i think it's back it's it's what is that what does that face steven is that for real i mean i know of multiple people who have it right now the reason why i have to work from home tomorrow during the day is my son's school there was a close contact my son's a fucking lib though and he's wearing a mask so he'd probably be fine what a pussy i know every picture i see fucking lib though and he's wearing a mask. So he'd probably be fine. What a pussy. I know. Every picture I see of him in school, he's got his fucking mask

on. He's such a sheep. I had non-COVID COVID two weeks ago. Yeah, me too. It's just sick. Yeah, I guess, but it felt exactly like COVID. It just wouldn't test as it. I don't know what it was. Variant. This, yeah. Oh, we're out of it. Oh, we're done. Oh, fuck that. It's over. Never mind.

We won. We won. People who I know who have it right now, you're pussies. Yeah, I don't know anyone who's had it in like a couple months. Well, you do know a couple of them that I know. Well, they haven't told me. Buddy. They're going to break the news any minute now. People in the office?

Yeah. Drop some names. Nah. Can't do it. Why do people act like COVID is like an STD? Steven is so concerned right now. Steven is so concerned. I have officially been.

You're standing up like a meerkat right now. I've been over COVID for a very long time and the fact that like if someone tells me they had it and I was sitting next to them, I'm like, okay, cool. Why is that supposed to be a secret, though? I don't know. I guess it doesn't. It's not like herpes.

I has it right now. He's just working through it. Steven, how much? What if you got so sick you couldn't do the draft, Steven? That's been a concern of mine. That would be so funny. Well, you could just do it from home. I mean, it's today.

Like – or sorry. Today is Wednesday. Tomorrow's the draft. Tomorrow's the draft. So, like – What if you get hit by a car tonight and break both your legs? That's probably how I'm going to die is get hit by a car. Why?

If I have a car accident. If you break both your legs, you're going to be on the show tomorrow night. Depends how I break my legs, I guess. Oh, you mean like if it's what if they're like words or outward mitigating circumstances i mean what happens if they're like trying to save my leg like yeah i'd probably miss the show for that wow not a football guy confirmed i guess night of the year um yes you're not going to chicago nope that lack of dedication i've already put a down payment on the house.

It's going to be very funny when I do move to Chicago and the majority of the office comes with me and everyone's going to be like, oh, I guess nothing did change. I'm like, yeah, that's what I said when it happened, when I told you. I just plan to move and follow somebody from Barstool all across this country every two or three years. Come with me. I can't wait to live in Kansas City because of Large large i can't wait to live in in denver because of sass it's gonna be great maybe one day king of new york um all right so what's up guys how we doing let's let's get it going let's fucking fire it up let's fucking spin the fucking wheel

let's do it let's let's find something let's find a wave. Let's ride a wave. Yeah. All right, spin a wheel. Then we'll ride the wave. Let's ride the fucking wave right now. Didn't like that. Didn't like that setup. It'd be sick if it got to be KB7. Oh, my God.

No. No, it's not. No. It is. It is. Oh. I actually, wait. I actually Instagrammed today.

Wait, can you go back to it? I Instagrammed today and I said, I'm feeling swirly. Oh, my God. Brandon's running. It happened. Where are you going to the bathroom? He's running. Oh, you're going to lock it?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Lock it off. Lock it off. Well, we're not doing it today, right? Well, no, if one of us gets it, we are doing it today. Oh, shit, yeah. Lock it off. Lock it off. But we're not doing it today, right? Well, no. If one of us gets it, we are doing it today. Oh, shit. Oh. Oh, I'm so happy.

I'm so happy. Can we have the Barstool versus America's boy FaceTime in for this? Yeah, we got to get everyone. Hold on. I got to tweet this. I just. If you look at my Instagram story, my Instagram story says

I'm feeling swirly wheel today. So Brandon's locking the bathroom. We should probably get like... We should probably try to get more... Sass has not said a word. No, I'm not. I just realized Sass has not said a word. It's like the one...

I saw a comment yesterday. They were like, the only person who thinks this is funny is Big Cat. This is bullshit. No one will stand up to him. Yeah, I got a lot of DMs about that. They were like, you've got to stand up to Big Cat. I feel like the audience thinks it's kind of funny. It's one time in the history of this show.

I mean, it might be funny, but I don't want to dump my head in fucking Frank's ass diarrhea. You can go directly. You can go. He was going to say die. He was going to say die. You go directly in the shower. Dude, it doesn't matter. Once your face has touched, like, I mean, we got a lot of gross people that work here.

I agree. I'm one of them. Including me, yeah. I take disgusting shits in that me, yeah. Yeah, we're both. I take disgusting shits in that toilet every day. Oh, man. That's like the shit toilet because it's a one-person bathroom. We can go upstairs.

We can go upstairs. You want to try to find one upstairs? Do it as a choice. Okay. I'm hoping I just don't get it. Yeah, that's the thing. It's like I'm- There's a good chance I do.

Also, I don't want to see any of my boys getting swirled in that toilet. It really comes down to the fact that my gambling brain just keeps telling myself there's no chance I'll get it. All right, guys. That toilet's in good shape right now. Okay. It is? There's no way it is. You locked it off?

Well, I reserved it. I put the sheet up, said reserve yak until 2 o'clock. So we got this swirl. Well, the cleaning lady's going in there actively. Oh, go tell her to clean the toilet. Yeah. Go tell her to clean the toilet. I'm not going to tell that woman to clean the toilet.

Go ask her to clean the toilet. I'm not going to go ask her to clean the toilet. Just say calmly, like, hey, can you clean the toilet? There we go. No. All right, go, Stephen, go. I gave her $100 when I was drunk. You gave everybody $100.

Oh, I actually gave Bernardinho, we gave him $400. $400. Oh, man, what a day. Like, it was like we didn't even have a vibe, and then it just boom. We were close. Wheel knows. We've been close for two days. So Swirly's off the wheel, officially off the wheel.

Are we adding something or just keeping it? Is the wheel broken? It hasn't been very random recently. It's all been landing in the same spot. If you spin it in a certain spot, you're guaranteed to land. It's not completely random. He's been trying... Did you try to get swirly? You talking to me?

Yes. I spin the wheel when you guys say spin that wheel. No, no, no. But do you spin it from the same spot every day? That doesn't make sense. It's spinning and then I just click on it. I don't think it makes sense. I mean, this is electric.

We hit the swirly wheel. Guys, if one of us has to get swirly, we have to get swirly. It just is what it is. It sucks. I hate it. I don't know why we punished ourselves, but goddammit, we're here. Alright, so I will I'm going to FaceTime. I'm going to try to FaceTime everyone.

Let's do a group chat FaceTime. Yeah. Or can you actually just get them on a Zoom? Can you send a Zoom link? Yes. Yeah, probably. Just do a group chat FaceTime. Yeah. Or can you actually just get them on a Zoom? Can you send a Zoom link? Yes. All right, perfect. Give me like two minutes. Perfect. And then if one of the guys that gets it is not here,

we'll just do it when they come back. All right. No question. Again, is this all 10 of us across the board? An X in the chat, baby. Zaz, it's TJ, it's all of us. Yeah, because we won on the future episode. Yes, everyone.

It's a straight elimination. Everyone is on. Everyone is on. Oh, that's right. You're in the middle of it. Everyone's on, yes. Zaz, do you like this? Am I the only one who thinks this is funny?

Big Cat, I'm in, man. Yeah, I think it's funny. I'm happy to be here. I'm in. I'm taking the positives out of this. Listen. Fuck it. Let's get twirly.

Right, exactly. The image of us dangling onto the toilet is not going to be great. I just want to push back. I want to push back and everyone's like, oh, Big Cat's the only one who likes this. I think there's a silent majority. No one's going to disagree with this. I think there's a silent majority. No, there was to disagree with this. I think there's a silent majority. No, there was, I think, was it, who was next?

Brandon said yesterday he didn't want to do it. I don't want, no, I don't want to do it. No one wants to do it. Yeah. No one wants to do it. Well, I'd do it, yeah. People are afraid of the backlash that they're going to get for being against the wheel. I guess that's part, that's actually a good culture that I've created.

The wheel is truly a son of a bitch. Yes, that's a good culture because otherwise- I mean, I'll do it if it lands on me. Otherwise we'll never do anything. But I don't want to do it at all. Neither do I've created. The wheel is truly a son of a bitch. Yes, that's a good culture because otherwise we'll never do anything. But I don't want to do it at all. Neither do I. But I will. I might even dump in it before. Jesus Christ.

Lead from the front. Big Cat leads from the front. At least it's early. Big Cat left five minutes before so he could take a dump in the swirly water. At least there's only like two people here in the office. Yeah. Well, it is on the internet, this show. No, I mean like so that no one really has had the opportunity.

Oh, yeah, you're right. It's a low popular day. It's going to suck. None of the big boys are in the office. You feel convinced you're not getting it Cause you're That's why we have two gambling I put my life on the line I might make this a death wheel

Not just a swirly wheel I'm convinced I am getting it This wheel is making me fat phobic What do we got Stephen Shea This swirly wheel Like I'm angry at fat people You're gonna walk out and just be like Disgusted with Frank and Doug's?

I'm just picturing them shitting in it. Hold on. He's giving us a toilet update. What? We had to go get a translator. She's going to clean it again. Oh, okay. Great.

Dude, that's going to basically be like taking a bath. I might not even shower after. Steven, are you good with this toilet? I suggested it. Steven was the one who came up with it there we go let's change the narrative around it I'm bullying people we're all fine

I'm fine Sass is a resistor it's actually your role on the show I don't want to do it but I will who's the worst it could be besides Sass he may never He may quit

It's gonna be so gross You think Zaha Oh Oh no no So I went down a rabbit hole When we were doing this Old swirly thing Apparently the water

In the bowl of the toilet Is like the cleanest water So like in emergencies You can drink that It's like a dog's mouth Like a dog's mouth It's cleaner than yours. Come on.

But it's also still a toilet. All right, put everyone's name on there. There's been shit in there in very close quarters. Can we get it over with? Is it just one spin? No, it's an elimination wheel. Okay, good. Yeah.

That's way better. No, I would actually, this is going to sound fucked up because it doesn't make any sense. If it was one spin, I think i would guaranteed be swirled but an elimination wheel i have no chance now one spins a lot scarier all right way scary all right so wait before we go elimination wheel we send the zoom out to the boys so hopefully we'll get all of them on elimination wheel and then the last two standing best out of seven okay i'm down with that yeah sure and if and here's what we should also do

if the last two standing if one of the last two standing is not here we'll save that all right all right fair enough right i think that's fair we'll save that if if the last two standing is any is is two of us we'll do it we'll do it to completion today. Yep. But if it's anyone who's not here, we will save that for a specific day when the office is packed and everyone's taking shits. When they come back. When they come back, we'll just lead off a show with a swirly. Yeah, it'll just be the swirly wheel. But we will get at least-

Order Chipotle for the whole office. I don't- Dude, I actually would. I would just get- Oh, there she goes. She's bringing the mop in. Yeah. I would get Chipotle for the whole office.

I would spend $1,000 to have everyone just have Mexican food run through them on Swirly Wheel Day. God, it would be funny. Seth, I think you're going to be fine. I'm really, I'm not that worried about it. Yeah, no. See, I'm not either. And neither are you. I mean, if. I'm really, I'm not that worried about it. Yeah, no, see, I'm not either. And neither are you. I mean, if they're cleaning it, that's not bad.

This is so funny. We've got to find something that's just even, that's just as bad that we can replace Swirly Wheel with, that will get everyone upset again. I don't know what that would be. Sass, maybe you decide. I think in this office, there's not really much worse that we could do than a swirly. Here's a wrinkle. Whoever gets swirly wheel, I think should get to decide the next terrible punishment,

and they're immune to it. Ooh, that's a good idea. Yeah. Immune, though? I don't know. Yes. I think then, because then they'll do something terrible. Yeah.

And then it ups the ante. And we could just keep going forever, where if you have to do the terrible wheel, you then get off of it for the next one, but you get to decide the next bad thing. Or you can go light strategically. Yeah, you could go. All right, so that's a new rule. That's a new wrinkle rule that I put on there. So one bad punishment equals you skip the next one.

Whoever ends up doing the swirly, you get to skip the next one, and you also get to pick the next one. You pay it forward. Yeah, that would just be the bad slice of the wheel. Oh, God. Okay. All right. I think mine would be after, I don't know what.

I don't know what mine would be. I don't know. There's not really much worse. Yeah. What about Frank shitting on your chest? Well, yeah, aside from something like that. Anyway. We, like, actually.

That was pretty quick that I was able to come up with something worse. I was thinking the exact same thing. This is not that bad. It's not ideal by any means, but there are definitely things that are worse. This is like clean water. It's toilet water for sure. I've had to go into that bathroom.

Loser has to give Doug's a rusty trombone. I don't even know what that is, but it sounds like it. You eat his ass while you jerk him off. Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh, man, I love this type of shit. Really gives me life. God damn it. Just doing fucked up shit with my boys.

Who's the guy in the suit don't know we should swirly his ass yeah we should throw him on the wheel gross suit guy on there looks like a young hugh freeze i think actually all six of us could physically grab him oh 100 he's a he's not a small guy no we have. So before we said that the person who gets chosen can resist. Oh, yeah. I don't think that we should do that. I mean, we can. Do we want to?

I won't resist. If I go all the way through a wheel, I'm not going to best of seven. I'm just going to be beaten. I think actually if you resist, it could be way worse. What do you mean resist? Like you can fight back. If you win, you don't have to go through with it. It's kind of funny, though, if we just have a battle royale.

So it's really a fight wheel at that point. Yeah. Yeah. We also should all just be very clear that you are consenting to this. Yes, I consent. I consent to the swirly wheel. I consent to the wheel at all times. I'm iffy with the consent, but you guys can take that however you want it.

I'd like to point out like a month ago, you were just all down with being waterboarded yeah that's true in that same bathroom so much that is yeah but you were like i wasn't actually waterboarded i know but you were adamant about it you wanted to be actually waterboarded yeah but then i realized it's not possible to do it if you're with people that like you all right. But that is not even in the same realm. If I was getting waterboarded with shit water, it would be a different story. We're just going like a... Oh, no, you dunk your head fully in.

Right, but you don't go all the way down here. Oh, yeah, you do. I don't think the toilet's that deep, though. I don't think you can get your whole... Well, it wouldn't be that bad if it was just your hair getting wet. It's your whole face is in the water. Your lips are all up on the bottom of the toilet. No, you don't have to put your lips in.

It's your head. It's the top of your head. Then there's nothing even bad about that. Exactly. Where are you at with this thing? I can't understand you. Oh, it doesn't sound like a swirly. No, you dunk your head in.

I guess. The swirly is the hair. It gets into a swirl, basically. Yeah, I guess there could be some spray in your eyes. When you flush, the water swirls around your head. Yeah. Oh, okay. I've never been swirly.

It is a good point that Brandon brings up. It's like you were like, guys, please waterboard me. Torture me. I wanted to feel what... I wanted to know what it's like you were like, guys, please waterboard me. Torture me. I wanted to feel what I wanted to know what it felt like. You'll feel it today. Torture me to be like, I don't know, one in ten chance of a swirly, I'm out. No, I'm in. Torture me.

It's just an iffy consent. We should hook you up to a car charger, your ball sack. I'll be my next punishment. Are the guys joining zoom by the way i said something while we wait i said something on pmt day that people get very upset about i said that basketball is the ultimate team sport people are like that's so wrong what do you think the ultimate team sport is football definitely no so every specific job yeah no i get that but i'm saying like in basketball you have to play as a cohesive unit more than like any other i guess hockey maybe but like i was gonna say hockey

last two minutes you can just kind of run iso yeah but everyone still has to do a job like but then the defense has to do a job like help defense and rebounding and and the way you have to talk on the floor i asked that man about basketball yeah i guess so what do you think brandon though i just think that basketball the it has the the most like talking and if one link is is off it gets exposed super quickly whereas like in football yes like obviously if you're if your tackle is not blocking well there's there's schools of thought i mean basketball is a sport where one man can take over more than he can take over in any other sport. Correct.

I agree with that. Even baseball, if you consider the best player in baseball history can only bat three or four times. All the bad players also have to bat three or four times. But then a pitcher can dominate. So not really there. It's either basketball or football. Yeah, I just think, and I guess hockey is similar to basketball, but I just think the amount of talking you need to do and at a high level, like an NBA team,

if one guy's out of his rotation, you just get torched. I even go further with football. I mean, it even has to be coached well. It has to be everything from the top down has to be in working order like if you've got a poor coach and good players you're going to be a bad team i guess basketball you get away with that because maybe maybe what i'm trying to say more is like when a basketball team plays as a team there's nothing prettier when played well and everyone's moving the correctly and the spacing is correct and everyone knows knows their role, and the passes are working, and the ball is shifting.

The last 15 years has been beautiful in the NBA because it's gone towards ball movement and teamwork more so than it ever had been. And, yeah, it's beautiful to watch. Yeah. Spurs, the Warriors. Maybe that should be my argument. I would say crew is the ultimate team sport.

What the fuck, dude? Why are you the way you are? Yeah, come on. I have a crush on Katie Stats. I have a crush on Katie Stats. You have a crush on Katie Stats? No. She rode crew in college. Oh, I didn't know that.

Yeah, right. You didn't know that. Crew people are like super athletes. Oh, yeah. They're insane. Yeah. They're so strong. It's crazy.

Wish I did crew. You ever do the erg? From here? I guess my only counter to the football argument would be. It's hard. The offense and defense don't have to have any cohesion. I don't know. You got the best quarterback in the world and your offensive line sucks.

No, no, no. The offense and the defense on your team. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Your offensive room and your defensive room could be completely separate. No, but that offense still needs that defense to go do their fucking job. Of course, of course. But, like, those guys aren't, like – like, I know – I've known guys that, like, oh, we don't even talk to the defense, really.

Whereas in basketball, you have to do it all, and you have to do it all together. And then all the efforts of those two units can be just – if you've got a shitty punter who just continues – So it may be, like, a whole team, team, but like the separate pieces. What you're saying is you have to play it. You have to know. In-game action, the whistle-to-whistle basketball looks the best when it has a team. What just happened?

What? The door to the bathroom shut. Steven's standing right there. No, it wasn't anyone. It was Frank. Frank. This is going to be the most sanitary swirly of all time. I guess I was also thinking about it more because...

I was thinking about it more off of the Nets Celtics series because those guys have insane talent, and the Celtics have insane talent too, so it's not like the Celtics are some plucky underdog. They're the two seed. But they play together as a team. They're dogs together, yes. They play together as a team significantly better than the Nets ever did. Let me lay this out for you.

That will beat you all the time. Lack of teamwork in basketball is far more harmful than any other sport. These are our legal guys. Oh, what's up? Legal guy. Sorry, what's your name? Paul Anderson. Oh, I know Paul.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is Paul Anderson. So can you talk Paul. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, it's Paul Anderson. Sass, so can you talk to that mic real quick? Have a seat. Sass is iffy on the consent of the swirly wheel? No, I said sure. Graduated from slaps. We're doing swirly.

Yeah, yeah, we're swirly. So can you, what does he have to legally say to be we're good? I said maybe. I hereby consent to a swirly well first and foremost do you want to be on the swirly wheel i don't know i think i have to be impartial right i can't yeah you're right that's smart that was a legal trick what if he's what if he's drunk actively you're not giving the swirly though right so well no he could be giving the swirly. Just say you can. I consent. Here we go.

Is that good enough? I'm not drunk. You're not drunk and you can sober and I consent. And now where's the line of me? Like people are like, oh, he's he's bullying them into doing that. Is that like how much money do you think I can get out of this? Like just keep asking. Yeah.

But is there a line where it's like, oh, I've I've coerced. Well, now we're talking about coercion yeah right you're not being coerced right i'd like to think not i don't know though am i taking i would like to say right now take me some time to think about it publicly under my own free will i consent to the swirly wheel and uh anything that comes with it i consent to the swirly wheel i also consent to the next challenge of Frank shitting on one of our chests. I also consent on Sass' behalf. All right. Thanks.

That works, too. Yeah, perfect. Awesome. Do we need to talk about swirly technique? Or what's the strength, any of that? It's going to be that toilet. So it's a pretty strong toilet. But I think it's just a dip.

It's not going to be anything crazy. We're not going to hold their head underwater. You want to be present for the swirly? You can be. Probably should recuse yourself. That's a legal term. We're killing it right now. What did you get on your LSATs?

Oh, I don't remember. Oh, that's a bad sign. That means you didn't do well. What law school did you go to? Cardozo. Huh? Did you make that up? That's in New York, right?

In New York. Fuck yeah. Yes. What other law? It's in New York, right? In New York. Fuck yeah. Yes. What other law? He's got the glasses help. Yeah, I only put these on when I'm in New York. How many times have you said, I'm a lawyer, I'll sue? Today?

No, just in your life. Never. It's implied. This is David Blackman with hair. It is. David Blackman with hair. I just realized that. That's David Blackman with hair. That might be anti-S with hair. I just realized that. That's David Blackman with hair.

That might be anti-Semitic of you. Wait. Accurate. Is that a wig? Are you David Blackman? I am David Blackman. We are both members of the tribe. Wait.

What was the guy in American Psycho? Was it Paul Thomas Anderson? That's the director. Oh, okay. You are Jewish? Yes. Oh, thank God. You're good. All right. Well, thank you, Paul. We appreciate okay. You are Jewish? Yes. Oh, thank God. You're good.

All right. Well, thank you, Paul. We appreciate it. Thanks a lot, guys. Yes, you're the best. Totally. We'll probably need some more legal documents as this show progresses. Okay.

All right. Perfect. Perfect. Thank you, Paul. There we go. We're legally. Oh, here we go. We got the boys.

We got the boys. Hey, Owen. Hey, what's up, We got the boys. We got the boys. Hey, what's up, Owen? He's always eating on the show. I just lost Nick. What do you mean you just lost Nick? We're at Bucky's having lunch on a bag of kernels. I'll find Nick and Kyle. Did Roan respond?

You can let me go for now. Is Roan down that bad? What? Is Roan down that bad? What? Is Roan down that bad? Do you want to mute them real quick? We're not talking to you, Owen. We're talking to each other. He texted me like eight minutes ago,

and he said better than last night but not fully better. Tell him to join the Zoom. I'll text him. My boy's down bad god i hope at least one of one of the final two is on is not here so we can just get some more time to like mentally prepare for it yeah but then again i'd spend like three weeks waiting to well i just kind of want to know now like when are we going to start spinning i still think uh by the way that basketball is the ultimate team sport. I'm going to stand by that.

I'm fine with that. I'm fine with that. I am. I don't think you figured out a way to articulate that. I don't think so either because it's very hard to articulate. All of those sports besides baseball need great cohesion. Stephen Shea doesn't think that Steph Curry is a superstar. I guess there's just more moving parts in football, so that just makes it.

It was blown out of proportion. You also changed the definition. He was like, he said Chris Paul was a superstar. He is. Any definition of superstar, Steph Curry's in it. Any definition. Correct. I didn't say he wasn't.

I was thinking about him being like the eighth guy. And yeah, that's fine. Behind Devin Booker and Jason Tatum. Correct. Okay. Right now. Let's do a spin. Let's spin.er and Jason Tatum. Correct. Okay. Right now. Should we do a spin? Let's do a spin.

Let's spin. Let's get it going. Okay. Let's eliminate somebody. Let's spin. Let's spin. Free somebody right now. Can you guys retweet the tweet from the Yak account?

Yeah. Let's free someone. My family has a history of freeing people. Let's do it. Yes. Let's free someone. This will be very comforting if you're one of the first people. How mad will the chat be if I am the first one freed?

I don't think it matters. No, I think there are some people in the chat who are just... They can't truthers out there? No, they just don't like... They think that everyone's being coerced. Steven is the one who came up with this. They think people are being coerced. I don't know why you watch this. correct we're just dudes doing dude stupid shit correct and the next stupid thing is going to be hilarious too at one o'clock in the afternoon we're going to

do stupid shit sorry it's pretty much the yak can be described as is it's a can you hang show steven i forgot steven was one who fucking said the swirly wheel yeah he was didn't even come from my brain stevens this this came from the, and we talked about how awful it would be, and I thought it would be very funny, so I suggested Big Cat. I'm going to compliment him. I don't know if Steven Shea gets enough credit for being down to clown for whatever. I mean, he's got a tattoo with a bad philosophy. He pissed his pants.

He pronounced the swirly wheel. He's down for whatever. He absolutely is. Was that guy joking when he said Steven can't be a part of it? No, yeah, I think so. He was a little too jokey for my liking as a whatever. Yeah, absolutely. Was that guy joking when he said Steven can't be a part of it? No, yeah, I think so. He was a little too jokey for my liking as a lawyer. Yeah, me too. You never want your lawyer to be a bad joke.

Also, if you can't say your LSAT score, I assume you bombed. Yeah. It's been the wheel. Is LSAT? Oh, no, bar is the thing after. Oh, God. All right, so this is a first person off the wheel. All right, here we go.

All right, Owen and Nick, this is how it's going to work. You guys can hear me? All right, Owen you hear me all right so here's how it's gonna work it's an elimination wheel it's an elimination wheel we're gonna get down to two people when we're down to two people it's a seven game series if any of the the final two are not present today, we're going to save that for when everyone's here. I can get swirly right here. Well, I want to be there when you're swirly. I want to swirly you.

I want to swirly you. Although he is in a truck stop bathroom. Their audio sucks. They're in the middle of nowhere. As soon as you go down past the Mason-Dixon line and get on the fucking phone. Wonderful place. Everybody's got acreage.

Jesus Christ. All right, let's spin. All right, spin it once. Who's the first one out? There will be some anger if I'm the first one out. Sass! My boy! Let's go.

Sass! The wheel is just, Sass. How, Sass, you could just do a fucking heel switch and be like, yeah, who wouldn't be on the... No, I still don't want to see my boys get swirled, but... Your boys are fine with it. Way to go, Sash. I know they're not.

That's huge, dude. That's huge. All right, when does your gambling brain switch? It's now one and nine. Oh, I will not get concerned until... One or three? Until it's five. Oh, really?

I would say five is when I... No, because with the seven game series at the end, I will not get concerned until it's 3. Oh, really? I would say 5 is when I'm concerned. No, because with the seven-game series at the end, I'm definitely going to win that. Okay. It really is a broken brain. It's really a mental thing. It really is a broken brain when people try to explain probabilities and stuff to me. I'm just like, what do you mean? I'm just going to win.

What are you talking about? Implied odds? All right. I'm going to win. If a favorite talking about? Implied odds? All right. I'm going to win. If a favorite's minus 200, they always win. Just keep going. Yeah, let's keep powering through it. All right, mute them because their shit is terrible.

Zah! Zah, zah, zah. Man. I actually kind of wanted to get swirly. This is shaping up for us to having to finish this at a later date. We haven't eliminated. Just eliminated two people in person. That's true.

Okay. Today is kind of a perfect day for this to happen. Yeah. Except for the part that half of us aren't here. Almost all of us. The majority of the in-studio show is not present imagine if it happened tomorrow that would have sucked sucked oh yeah you're gonna have a draft here you gotta have your draft you gotta have everything right tomorrow all right here we go spin it again

oh oh people are gonna cry foul at that. AB is safe. Way to go, KB. Okay. See, now I'd be getting scared. No, I'm not even sweating. 107 right here. See this hand right here? Shaken. See this hand?

Zoom in on this hand. Shaken a little. It's totally fine. Zoom in on that hand. You could be a surgeon with those hands. Very flashy. Not even. I'm like Tom Hanks at the end of Saving Private Ryan.

I'm fine. Oh, Nick's calling me. This is probably a better idea. Oh, yeah, that is a good idea. Yeah, yeah. No, the audio's on the phone. You can watch, but the audio's on the phone. I see.

I got it, I got it, I got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, here we phone. You can watch, but the audio. I see. I got it. I got it. I got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. Here we go. We're spinning again. KB just got taken off. KB just got taken off.

Yeah. We don't know where he is. Figures. Okay. Can you turn that off? Yeah. Wait. Mute your computer.

We want to swirly you, though. We want to be part of it. Yeah, we want to be part of it. Mute your computer. I don't want toly you though. We want to be part of it. Yeah, we want to be part of it. Mute your computer. I don't want to wait two weeks with that over my head. None of us do. Alright, yeah. Move the mic away from your mouth.

And put the phone up to the... Yeah. Alright, here we go, KB. What do you got? Alright here we go KB What do you got I should cut on KB KB is Is Is number one

In the Barstool vs. America crew To get cancelled For wearing a t-shirt That he found on the road Alright next one You just revamped your wardrobe Alright I am actually rooting for Roan to get off because he's not accounted for here,

so he won't. He has the only. He's the only one who can be like, this is bullshit. I didn't witness it. I don't think he would do that, but I'm rooting for Roan to get off. There are seven names left, boys. All right, here we go. Spin it again.

It's not going to be me. It's not going to be me. Oh, and there it is. I told you, boys. I ain't worried at all. Oh, boy. I ain't worried at all. Not a big deal.

Guaranteed. I made that a life. I said I would kill myself if I got to Swirly. That's how confident I was. All right. Spin it again. It's going to be me. It's going to be me.

Land on pink, baby. Stop on pink, baby. Let's go. Let's go. Let's fucking go. All right. Oh, that feels great. I'm rooting. Let's go. Let's fucking go. All right. Oh, that feels great. I'm rooting.

That feels incredible. It's the best feeling ever. That's part of the experience. So I'm rooting for Che to have to get swirly. I just want that on the record. I am too. Yeah. So if it's TJ and Che, we will finish the swirly wheel today.

If not, we'll have to finish the finals. Are we doing the swirly if it's one of us? Yeah, if it's TJ versus Che in the finals, then we're swirling today. All right, here we go. We got the toilet cleaned. We got the toilet cleaned. Yeah. All right, here we go.

Conditions are immaculate. But I want to do it today. Right now. Owen, you're clear. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Two here, two not here. All right, spin it again. This is a huge spin.

This is big. This is a huge spin. How is she always around? Roan. That's justice for Roan. TJ, what can you say? Nick is the opposite of me in terms of gambler's luck because when we proposed this the first time,

he was like, I'm going to get swirly. If this comes up, Nick, we're swirling today. Yeah, if this hits Nick, we're hanging up on them and we're swirling. Okay. If this lands on me, I want you guys to jump me as soon as I fucking walk in the office. Oh, if it lands on you, you're out. Oh, no, I know. Yeah, yeah.

Excuse me. Okay. All right, here we go. One more spin. This will be either the last spin of the day or the start of a new journey. Oh, no. Come on. a new journey. Oh, no. Come on. Oh.

Yeah. Oh, fuck. Nick. God damn it. All right. So at a later date, it will be TJ versus Nick for the swirly wheel. This is okay. It's still not going to be me. Yeah.

So seven-game series when you come back, Nick. God damn it. All right. We'll see you when you get back. Wait. God damn it. Alright, we'll see you when you get back. Wait, wait, it's me for sure? No, it's you versus TJ. You versus TJ. We're spinning it right now though, right? When y'all get back, you and TJ will spin.

No, I want to know right now. We could just go ahead and... Alright, you want to know right now? We can know right now. We're not swirling. Oh, then we'll have to swirly TJ. TJ. Yeah, we'll swirly TJ today.

Y'all don't want to be here for the swirly? You can swirly TJ without me. All right. Okay. Here we go. Seven game series. He wants it. Nicky...

What Nick wants, Nick gets. Oh, God. This is good for your street rep, by the way, TJ, that you're not rigging the reel. All right, now wait. Again, once again, for this one, your name. You want your name. You want your name. Four times.

Your name counts as a win. Your name counts as a win. The first name that hits four times is the winner. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Spin it. Go. spin it go TJ

TJ won nothing poor Nick this is okay this is still okay I'm going to get four in a row alright spin number two This is still okay. I'm going to get four in a row. All right. Spin number two. TJ.

TJ. Two-0. Damn. Oh, I hate how this is playing out. Two-nothing. No, there always is a comeback. There's always a comeback. I'm not even starting to worry. There's always a comeback.

Oh, TJ. It's going to be a clean sweep. TJ blows a 3-0 lead. We've been talking about this for the rest of time. TJ needs offseason surgery on his right thumb, his spinning thumb. Yeah. Here we go. We lose, Nick.

Jesus Christ. He's still there. I'm here. I'm here. I see it. Oh we go. We lose Nick. Jesus Christ. He's still there. I'm here. I'm here. I see it. Oh, no. Nicky. Nicky.

Oh, he's on the board. All right. All right. He's back. He's back. He's back. He's back. Simple is back.

He's back, baby. My boy is back. I'm nervous. Oh, man. Here it comes. DJ, what are you doing? That's right. No, the wheel's like Mario Kart.

It always gets closer. Oh, damn. Come on. Come on. This would be electric. Come on, Nick. Hey, Nick, where are y'all at? I know you're at a Bucky's, but where?

Macon, Georgia. Oh, gross. Okay. What could he have said that would have been like, ooh, that's beautiful? Macon, Georgia is beautiful, actually. Yeah, I've always heard nice things about Macon, Georgia. Where Scott Hall debuted. All right, here we go.

Three, two. Oh. Come on, Three, two. Oh. Come on, Teej. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. to sleep in my own bed tonight. All right. Bye, Nick.

God damn it. I'll see you guys when I get back. Bye, boys. Yeah, thanks. Oh, man. All right. Not only did we get the rush, none of us have to do it. Yeah, and we get to save it for another day where we have a swirly day. That would have been so bad, too, if it was me and there was only, like, four of you guys

to try and hold me by my ankles. That would have be an issue. Oh, it feels good to have that out of the way now, doesn't it, Saz? Well, he's done. Well, not done. We have to do it, but it's something to look forward to. I forgot to tell Nick that he gets to, oh, this will be good. Nick getting to decide.

Yeah. The next punishment. I'll tell him right now So he can start thinking about it Oh man I love it Crazy how long they're gone Long ass time Yeah

Two weeks Shit's getting lonely in the apartment What does he get to do now? He's probably going to do a practice swirly run in the bathroom. He's probably blocking your number. He's disappearing from Earth right now. He just started a LinkedIn. I just talked to him.

He was just on the phone with us. True. Let me call him back. He likes me more than he likes you. I got it. I got it on. Hello? Hello? Hello?

Hello? Oh, they've gone dark. You think so? I think they've gone dark. You think they're going to swirl in? That doesn't count. I guess it would count. I'm sorry.

If he did it in a truck stop bathroom, he should be freed from the wheel for like a year. Oh, man. I just want to call him. I just want to talk to my boy. Well, this is going to be fun. Sass, what's up with you? You got any sets? You got anything you want to plug?

I'm doing shows this summer. I'm going around on the weekends just call my company man oh he's calling me back gonna be in DC Providence I forgot to say there's one benefit to this what's the one benefit

no you're actually gonna like this you're gonna like this it's a new rule that I've come up with cause you know I like the wrinkles and all these rules I'm a wrinkle guy so the one benefit is It's a new rule that I've come up with because you know I like the wrinkles and all these rules. Yeah, you're a wrinkle guy. I'm a wrinkle guy. So the one benefit is swirly wheel is going off the wheel, but it's going to be a new punishment.

And the new punishment is decided by you, and you are immune to that punishment. Okay, yeah. So it basically will just continue for the rest of the time where whoever has to do the worst thing, the next one they don't have to do, and they get to decide it. All right, I want to do the wedgie where the person gets hung up on a hook. Okay, great.

That would be great. Atomic wedgie. Atomic wedgie. That would be great. But then just so you know, the next one, so say I have to get atomic wedgie, then I'm know, the next one, so like say I have to get Atomic Wedgie, then I'm off for the next one, you're back on. Yeah, so it becomes like a game of chicken of how bad you want to do it,

like make everyone else. It's quite the game of chess. It's game. Yeah, all right. Cool. Thanks, Nick. See you soon. To that hanging wedgie. Hanging wedgie. Can't wait to fucking see you. That's a wedgie hanging wedgie can't wait to fuck that's a pretty good one i can't wait to hang wedgie is pretty funny hanging wedgie for the entirety of the show no no no

we're gonna need to go to a hospital yeah we're gonna need to we're gonna need to get some fucking load-bearing uh we need to have a wedgie set up logistical question are we putting hanging wedge in the so theoretically i think so i think so no i don't i think so or what do you think yeah i think so yes yeah i don't know i think so i think it goes on tomorrow that's a way worse punishment than a swirly i think so too i think it's way fun. That's a way worse punishment than a swirly. I think so, too. I think it's way, way worse. I think it's funnier, though. It might be funnier, but it's terrible.

You're going to be all fucked. That would hurt a lot. I'm going to not wipe that day, so you guys have to deal with just the worst smell everywhere. You just rip my underwear and it just comes out all the time. It's shit. What if you broke through? Cats shit. What if you broke through? Cats revenge. What if you broke through and then we got banned from YouTube?

I got banned. Fully naked. My dick just flopped out. Although I don't have a flop. You know guys who use pants? People would have flopping dicks because they're actually of size. Mine doesn't flop. Mine just is.

It would flop if you dropped from a certain height. No, I don't think so. It just kind of stays very close to my body. Always hard? They have a set location. You're always stiff? No, I'm always soft and small. That is, in a way, hard.

No, but you know the flops. The flops are impressive. Someone flops? What did we do the last 10 minutes of this? Yeah, I mean, that was electric. I'm very excited for it. Shoot the shit.

Oh, yeah. We could do that. We could fucking hang out with the boys. Let's see what Stephen Chay wanted to talk about. You guys started looking at houses in Chicago yet?

No, I haven't. Yeah, I've already got a real You should probably get in on that. I'm starting to make my Twitter header like Wrigley Field or something. That would be hilarious.

It's so funny that even how clear I could have been on the Dave Portnoy show, people would just take whatever you say and just hear what they want to hear. It's over. It's done. I love the people who do full analysis on the entire thing. Right. So clearly Big Cat's bringing X, Y, Z. And it's going to be tough.

Sounds like Big Cat wants to retire. When I literally said this move means that I'm going to be working for like another decade. I think when they just see that you're talking about it, they don't really care what you say about it. That's their license to then inject their opinions. Right. And I'm saving those receipts because when the Barstool Chicago office is fucking

bumping with like 40 people and we're probably the first office Tommy worked in. We're producing great content. Why would you guys get a bigger office though? Isn't that office huge? No, it's not big enough.

Oh, really? I think there's going to be a lot of people that will move. Yeah. My parents were concerned. Why? I don't know because you made a joke about me working remotely

and they were like are you getting left behind so you're going oh no you're going yeah they were concerned i'm going you're going steven's going sass is the only one who's not giving me a confirmation you're quick yeah i gotta think that's i think actually that's probably the part that fans don't realize as much which i why would they? Like, we don't really talk about it like that. There are a lot of people who, like, New York is very expensive. It's a difficult city to live in. So there's a lot of people who are like, oh, I could live in a more livable city

and have, like, a sick office environment. Yeah, let's fucking do it. Yeah, I mean, Chicago is an awesome city. I lived there for, like, a year. And we're going to get a big new office. And, office and yeah i'm gonna work my ass off for another i'm gonna work till i'm dead people know that i say i i joke about retiring i last night like people like you said when you retire you're only gonna do advisors no and i was like i'm gonna do pick them too i'm gonna keep working and it was like that's not retirement i was like yeah you're probably right yeah fat

ass is gonna make me rich. Yeah, hop on board. Kirby Puckett, get on these shoulders. Let's fucking go to the moon. No, I'll just like, I think there'll just be another phase in my career when I'm in like my early 50s where just all of my takes are just all wrong because I'm just not watching any sports anymore. And I just make like, you know, ESPN, like Wilbon and Kornheiser have a little bit of that going,

which I still love them. Right. But it's like, you can tell they haven't, they're not actually watching the games anymore. They're near the end of the trail. And Tony never hardly watched games. Right. But like you can tell when someone's talking about it, it's like, Oh, you didn't even turn it on. Yeah. And I'm not saying like I have great analysis,

but at least I watched the games, but there will be a point where I stop watching, and I'm very excited for how terribly wrong I will be on a day-to-day basis. I found a beautiful cul-de-sac in Naperville that I'm excited about. You'd be good in Naperville. You'd be good in Naperville. They'd welcome you there. They'd welcome your type.

Rent there would be awesome. I've got a buddy from Naperville that actually looks exactly like you. There you go. I know where to navigate to. I know I can find myself. My only thing is that I'm so close to home now, which is awesome. I'm going to train right away. Home is where the heart is.

It really is. Also, stand-up is another thing. What if the yak becomes a... Yeah. We have a year to push the yak to a point where everyone can get raises and we can just be like the Yak all the time in Chicago. Yeah. I really enjoy doing stand-up, though.

I know, but you can do it anywhere. And also, you already go to... You could come out to New York whenever you want. It's the easiest flight in the world. I know. What was the name of that improv place in Chicago where all the SNL people came? Second City. Second City's dead. No, but if we push the Yak SNL people came? Second City. Second City's dead.

No, but if we push the Yak, like, this is... The Yak could be Second City, brother. Dude, the Yak could be the big... Like, how sick would that be if we make the Yak to a point where it's like, that's all anyone has to do here? I don't think I would be able to not be on the Yak, is the thing. Right. Because, like, when I... Like, there'll be days where I'm like, oh, I gotta do the Yak today.

But then, like, when I'm not... Like, if we have, like, a break, like, for Christmas and stuff, and I'm not on the Yak, I'm like, oh, I got to do the yak today. But then when I'm not, like if we have a break for Christmas and stuff and I'm not on the yak. Miss the boys. Yeah, I start getting withdrawals. Oh, so we're really talking about this right now. I'm talking on camera. I also would, you know, like there's definitely things that will be done for people who are on the fence who I deem necessary to what I do. Oh, do I need to get on the fence?

No, you've already fucked yourself on that respect. I feel like when everyone moves to Chicago, though, this office is going to be completely dead. I mean, the only reason, I mean, no, there's people here. The yak is what keeps this office going right now. There's no one here. The other part that people don't see and understand is, like, this office is not what it used to be post-covid

it sucks especially i mean it's like spring now in the summer there will literally be only us here we're gonna fucking blow it up boys yeah hopefully uh no definitely no i have no doubt that you have to stay on the yak anyway because if you weren't on the yak like we actually would probably start literally murdering murdering each other with the wheel because no one would complain. We do need somebody to take the wheel. We're like, murder wheel. And Steven would be like, all right, well, I guess it's me,

so go ahead and shoot me. We need Sass to be like, is anyone going to stop this? Steven, you going? TBD. We have time. We we have time a lot of time i mean i still have a whole year on my lease that's the other thing i really have to everyone freaking out that it's like something's gonna change i have a lease myself in new york city that i think is all the way through july so yeah me too this year next year yeah so do the math on that so they're moving soon. What's the chances I get out there in six months and y'all just call me one day and say, just kidding?

Oh, listen, if you go first, there absolutely is a, you know, we should just fuck. Like, I would ruin my own life and my own future just to have an ultimate prank on you. Think anyone will move out early? Probably not. Brandon, the other thing about when you move to chicago you gotta wear a costume every day that's not true we get brandon to move for a costume party just kidding no one's going i did really like that office and the feel of it it did remind me of hq2 yeah i mean we're gonna have a bigger one i want a half court basketball oh yeah full court

yeah what now you're perfect now you didn't mention that before uh yeah maybe full court i'd do full court if we had space maybe his boneyard dude a full court would be awesome that'd be sick yeah just imagine the room for activities both teams we could do everything in there we could fucking we could have we could watch White Sox Dave speed pitch every day. It would just be a wheel room, wouldn't it? We'd turn it into a wheel room. Yes. We'd have punishment to have a physical wheel.

That would actually be pretty cool. Yes. This is where my mind is, boys. Oh, can we get the Price is Right wheel? This is where the people- There's a casino game on the iCasino with a huge wheel, Dreamcatcher. Also Crazy Time, something like that. This is where the people are like, oh, this is gonna suck.

It's like, no, dude. I'm thinking bigger. Everything's gonna get bigger. I don't think that many people think it's gonna suck. Yeah, no. I probably read pretty much some tweets that are people like, oh, I can't believe you're doing this. I think, without a doubt, it is a positive thing. Correct. I don't know

the Chicago guys that well, but it seems like they're in the office a positive thing. Correct. As long as like, I mean, I don't know the Chicago guys that well, but it seems like they're in the office. They're the best in longterm. Like I said, on the day Portnoy show, if you told me in five years, I had to still be living in New York. I'd probably be like,

I don't really want to be working anymore. If you told me in 10 years, I can live where I want to live in Chicago. I'm working forever. I'm working. I love my job. I don't want to fucking, I don't want to do anything else.

I don't want any other job. This is my life. I just want the money. The money will come. First we get the bitches, then we get the money. Then we get Range Rovers. What if we all got matching Range Rovers? That would be so sick.

Okay, so there's something we could talk about. What if I David Dobrik the whole yak and was like, everyone gets a Range Rover? Fuck, yes. That would be awesome. I'm not really that hard of a person to convince. I need you to keep being hard to convince because he's seven minutes. He just gave us a Range Rover. I never was like, oh, I'm definitely not going.

It's more just like, I don't know. We could get a house soon. We'll see what I do. I mean, I'm not going to speak on anyone's behalf except for the people that have given me a guaranteed yes. And there are people on the act that have given me a guaranteed yes. I'm not asking you who. How many guaranteed yeses have you got? On the act?

Or just in general or only? Oh, a bunch. A bunch. A bunch. Again, I don't want to say anything that like, oh, someone else. I'm not asking names. Oh, you said this. No names, but a bunch. And the act, a bunch, a bunch, a bunch. Again, I don't want to say anything that like, oh, someone else said this. I'm not asking names. Oh, you said this. No names, but a bunch.

And the Yak, a bunch. I mean, there's not that many of us. It's going to be great. I'm very excited. It's going to be great. We're all going to be fucking. Can we use the wheel to decide where we live? I would live.

Roommate wheel? Roommate wheel would be very funny. What if I just said, what if I told my family, I was like, listen, we're going back to Chicago, but one person from the Yaks is going to have to live in our house. I would definitely get a studio if I lived out there. What if I afford one? Dude, you can afford a mansion. I could afford a three-bedroom.

Son, this is Owen. You would have so much more room. Yeah, it's crazy. What are you paying rent right now? Like $2,000 a month. I don't know. I cannot even come close to affording it. It changes over the years, but my last apartment in Chicago when I moved to New York in 2016, was one and a half bedrooms, so it had an office with a backyard and a garage, and I was paying $1,300.

Before I got hired at Barstool, I was actively about to start putting payments down on apartments because I was in school in Chicago, and we were moving were moving off campus and it was like 800 a month yeah for like i mean for like a townhouse right with like a couple roommates what are you gonna say what were you say uh tj tom lee i think that he lives his studio is something like 12 50 or 1300 he lives in boystown yeah he lives he lives not too far from the office the place called boystown, is that where the office would stay? No, it's going to be in the city It's just where we can get the most space A ghetto town? Like in one of the neighborhoods

I just want space I want it so that we have space So that we have a full court So we have like, you know, everything I want everything I want all the fixings Yeah, that would be nice. Hot tub.

I want a ski slope. So this office would obviously stay because, I mean, they were saying on the Dave Porter show, like, there's still. Oh, and I'm still going to. I might actually. I might probably for a few years have. Actually, I almost definitely will have an apartment in New York still because, like, football season I'll probably have to be here a pewter tear yeah brandon are you just not going

boom boom room i don't know what i'm doing i really don't my lease is up in two months i have to get out of that house i i i don't know if i'm gonna go to mississippi for a year and then split time here and then split time mississippi and there i don't i don't know i don't know i'll figure it out i'll figure it out. I'll figure it out. But it's exciting because I up and moved my life to come to New York so why wouldn't I? Wouldn't I? Go where the action is.

The Yak is not only the best thing on Barstool right now, it's going to be one of the best and biggest things for a while so why wouldn't you? One heartbeat. One heartbeat. We could go two hours a day. We could have some sports talk. Fuck yeah.

Imagine if we talked sports. Prostitute wheel. Prostitute wheel. It's endless. The possibilities are endless. White Sox Dave wheel. You just have to live with him for a month. I think I'm out.

I think I'm out. That would be hilarious. I love White Sox Dave so much I was on I'm always sunny where they have to sleep with the old man yeah

I was on Chicago radio yesterday and they were like is there a chance that White Sox Dave cursed the White Sox with his John Cusack interaction that video was 100% yes

so fucking funny but here's the thing I don't want this narrative to start because I know White Sox Dave I've known him for a decade probably now. I know what you're about to say. I honestly think that White Sox Dave would kill himself if he thought that he was cursing the White Sox. He would get out of the White Sox.

That's how much he loves the White Sox. If you said to Dave, White Sox Dave, your presence has meant that the White Sox will never win anything ever again. He'd be like, all right, I'm out. I'm out of life. That's how much he loves the White Sox will never win anything ever again. He'd be like, all right, I'm out. I'm out of life. That's how much he loves the White Sox. Like Clayton Bigsby. I really truly think that. Do the White Sox have a large following?

It's way less than the Cubs, but the fans are very, very passionate. Passionate. Diehard, yes. The Mets? Yeah, kind of similar. Yeah. It's even more generational than the Mets, I think. Yeah, they're very, very passionate. Passionate. Diehard, yes. The Mets? Yeah, kind of similar. Yeah. Even more generational than the Mets, I think. Yeah, they're very, very passionate.

And, I mean, I don't like the White Sox, but objectively speaking, they have top five uniform. Yeah, but they are off to a really bad start. Yeah, they are. But, like, dude, their uniform. You don't like their uniforms? Oh, I think their color scheme, their uniforms are awesome. When they made that switch in, like, 92, 93 from their old ones to this one,

it was the coolest thing that happened in the history of sports. Yeah. The new White Sox uniforms, which were old White Sox uniforms, but were incredible. Yes. No, you don't like the white and the black pinstripes? Those are good. They have a bunch of different good uniforms.

Plain black hat with just socks across. Yes. Yes. That's like I like the Cubs uniforms and I like the Red Sox uniforms. Those are the only two uniforms you like in all sports. No, no. For baseball. I'd be funny if you're like I have two uniform takes.

Here they are. I don't like the discussion. I don't really like the Bruins uniforms. I like the Capitals uniforms. I wish more cities did what Pittsburgh did. I think that's also board. Yep. They should have colors. That's their colors. Yeah wish more cities did what Pittsburgh did. I think that's... Cross the board? Yep. Where they just have colors.

That's their colors. Yeah. Every team wears the same colors. I don't really love the Penguins uniforms. I think the Saints should have done it. I think New Orleans should have done it. Like, if they just... The Saints and the Pelicans.

Pelicans, yeah. That would have been nice. All right. We got anything else? That was a productive show. Some 10X shit from a viewer. This is from viewer Tavian. Look at that.

Oh, hell yes. Monty's finest right there. Hell yes. Dude, that's just... 10X is a lifestyle. You see that? Someone sent a... Oh, Bob Roarman.

There's people who actually are 10X. One of Greer. Greer knows a kid. I mean, I am. Right. What are you talking about? No, but like who follow the program. Did you hear me just describe what I want in the Chicago office? Yeah, that is 10x.

Instead of fucking ski slope. I didn't even think of that. You are being very 10x with that office. I'm 20x-ing that office. There's going to be a ball pit. There's going to be just a hose. Can I throw out an idea? There's going to be a hose that's just linked up to water that can just be turned on at any time.

In the middle of the office. What is that? Hose. This office doubles as international headquarters for Big Dog. Oh, my God. In my dreams, yes. Still got to figure out a hostile takeover for Big Dog. I do think that if we could figure out a way to get Big Dog

and just make a reality show of us just doing big dog shirts every day it would be a that would be awesome a moderately successful enterprise oh no big dog could be huge could be i had a conversation with them and they're like we got a lot of plans like the the the brand is really hot right now. I'm like... Because we're talking about it. Yeah. It's like, no shit. Like, this isn't... It was also a year ago, and now we're talking shit. And it's not like a huge ego thing to say that we, like,

got Big Dog back in the... Like, no one's talking about Big Dog. Right? Right. Yeah, no, it came back when you started. Like, oh, we made McDonald's popular. No, it's like Big Dog. Big Dog hasn't been talked about in forever. All right. No, it came back when you started. Like, oh, we made McDonald's popular. No, it's like Big Dog.

Big Dog hasn't been talked about in forever. All right. Tomorrow, I'm out. I'm back on Friday. I'll be here for the draft, obviously, tomorrow night. But I have to fucking stupid COVID close contact shit. I have to take care of my kids. So you guys got the ship with Frank?

Oh, we got it. Yeah. We didn't hit it, but we will keep it 80K. When 80K hits, it will be Frank the Tank time. Edible. Edible, yes. All right. See you everyone tomorrow.

All right. All right. It's the act. It's your drug, yeah, style, yeah, it's the act. It's the act. It's the act. Yeah, it's time to talk, shop, and do Yankee pop.

It's the act. It's the act.