The Yak - The VERY BEST Of The Yak (First Half Of 2026, Part 2): Fri Jul 3, 2026

Episode Date: July 3, 2026

You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyakYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, yak listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon music. You're the robot. Hi, Jimmy Ford. Are you still react? I'm the coolest one out of all of us. That was incredible.

Oh. What? Drag period. That works. Greg. Greg. Oh, what is. And at 6'4, weighing 270 pounds on Ossepic.

He averaged the double double in high school. The leader of the juggernauts himself. Give it up for Dana. I love the Greg entrance. It's Greg. Wow. And now, please welcome our umpire for today's game. Tom Yer.

There he is. Is that an actual? It's a real awful. You got some swag to him. All right. Oh, say, can you see by the dawns a light? What's so proudly with the twilight's last gleaming, whose broad stripes and bright stars through the pair.

Rollas fight, or the ramparts we watched were so gallantly streaming. And the rockets red glared, the bombs bursting in air gave proof through the night that our flag was still there. Oh, say does that star spangled band? The best. Thank you, John. You're the best. Thank you.

He's the absolute man. What a flyover. One more out of applause for John Vincent. Wow. Now, before we begin today's Yug-off, we want to remind you that Barstool's very own cream team will be around with free hot dogs and ice cream and mini helmets all game long. Yeah.

Now, throwing out the ceremonial first pitch with a snake around his neck, straight from the reptile, Dan. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome, Ali! Strangled. Let's go, let's go, Ali. Move up a little, Ollie. Yeah. Appreciate you, Ollie. I have something I would like to say whenever I have a chance.

Yeah, now's the time. Can I give a little monologue? Yeah, of course. Goochie doesn't like it. Baseball. America's pastime. Nine players. A bat, a ball.

Four bases arranged in a diamond. He's got it right. But most importantly, above all else, baseball is about rivalry. Red Sox Yankees, Giants, Dodgers, Cubs Cardinals, the sign stealing steroid using unoriginal pussies at home by 3. and Dana Beers. Today is about more than just baseball. Today is about all the people who have refused to take what's rightfully there is for centuries now.

The people who have been unable to use their backbone and speak up for a cause. Today is about who, today is about those who just resort. Fuck. Today is about those who just resort to saying it is what it is. Or in other words, that's baseball. Some scholars and experts would point out that, is awfully coincidental that Rob Gucci and Jay Swish. Two individuals who have been on the yak themselves

started posting clips saying, that's baseball, a mere three days after the historically original and creative Dana Beers said that's baseball on the yak on October 31st. I mean, what is this? Without being said, none of this matters when ballplayers get together and hash it out on the diamond. When push comes to shove, all that matters is results. Fellas, I do not give up, and I have determination.

Two quotes, Babe Ruth, it's hard to be the person who never gives up. Tommy Lasorda, never forget the spaghetti picture. The difference between the impossible and the possible lies in a personal determination. I'm here to take what's rightfully mine, and that's baseball. Well written, Dana. I'm going to counter with him. Far school, Greg. Let's have the um, fill up the beer.

Let's have the umphill up the beer. That would make sense. I got to fill it up. No, umpires. It's a little bit of fullness. The real hump is so good. Oh no, he's going to do a batch out. Oh, he's good.

He's good. He's warning about his phone. There's so much foam. There's so much foam. It's all phone. It's just full foam. Keep going, yeah. There's he going.

It's over. Why is he still filling? Nobody thought to run the phone out of it. Well, no, he didn't put the glass up. You can pour it in there if you are. Put your finger in there. That is his first port. Just get your butt, then put your finger in it.

Oh, that's nice. Oh, that's nice. Oh, wow. Nice. That's really, that's to the brim. Underestim. Put it on there. Go on the other side, Gooch.

Handle other way. Handle the other side? There's a matter. Gucci. Rob. Other side of the table. Do we have a... Yeah.

This is the camera right here, guys. Right here in front. This is the camera. I'll read it off. All right. So it goes once you... All right, it's calibrating. The input is mad.

We just need a timer. Oh, put his mask on. As soon as you pick it up, it is going to start. Drink it all, put it back down. You're on. Ready? Ready. Ready?

Ready? That's not the fast. Oh, no. Oh, no. Pretty good. A lot of spell. A lot of spell. It's okay.

7.87 and it's getting you a score 3904. Okay. Which we all know. We all know that. Yes. That score makes sense. What do we think, boys? I will say that was very fast.

I think it was speedable but solid. The scale is 10,000, right? Deutsch is a 10,000? Yeah, we're sure. It's a 10,000. Anyone write down those times or anything? 3904. We go for the time, too.

Guys, we've seen Greg too. Has to be accurate. No. No, he's not. No, he's not. Greg will be faster, but he will spill more. I know. Smooth four.

Come on, Greg. Greg looks confident. He keeps doing this thing with his ears. Oh my God, Greg, don't miss it. Oh, let's get... All right. On the show me state is behind you. Hurry up!

No, it doesn't matter. It times off. All right, all right, right. They won. They won. They won. Game one. I mean, that pickup is so cocked.

Tate, you're... 3904. Yeah, home by 3. Game 1. Wow, Greg. That's any one. It's any... No, it's halves.

That's half. That's the first half. You get confused. That's the first half. You just had the advantage there to know what Rob's time was, and you decided to throw Greg out there. No, I think we decided before. Oh, okay. So you didn't adjust at all.

you're not allowed to adjust. Well, no, you could have. Yeah, you could have. You're the home team. Yeah, you're the home team. Well, I still thought Greg would have beat seven and a half seconds, yeah. Yeah. So you believed in your guy.

I did. And Jordan, you got to be pretty excited about Rob's performance there. Yeah, well, I was cognizant of the time. I'd never seen Greg before out of the Show Me State, Missouri. So I didn't know his funnel. Yeah. But once he got about halfway through, I could see his flap kind of just kind of closed on him. Yeah.

So when the flap closes, like it's like the garbage of spot. I could just see nothing was going to go down. Yeah. We knew we had them. So that's game one. I mean, it's a long series, man, right? You can't get too horny right out of the gates. I've played in a lot of seven-game series.

It's game one. Yeah. What did you think about the, what did you guys think about the whole pomp and circumstance? I think we nailed it. That was awesome. That was unbelievable. Yeah. Yeah.

The flyover, it was a classy touch. And, you know, let's not, let's put some respect on the anthem singer, too. Playing through injury? Incredible. Great. Yeah. Upper body injury playing through it, you know? I have a question.

Yeah. Are we doing the same? thing tomorrow? Yeah. The flag and everything. We have different anthems. What do you think about you're not going to run it all back? What do you think about Dana's monologue? That's not exactly customary in the sports that I watch at least

for a guy to take the mic and give a monologue like that. Tell the other team fuck you kind of, you know? It's fine. It's just it's his home court, right? I would just say if I was going to step up, I would just say, to quote the late Colonel Sanders, I'd just say, I'm too drunk to taste this chicken. You know what I mean? Yeah. I don't need that bullshit. I'm good.

Fair enough. Oh, Tate's going. Oh, They actually do have hot. Yeah, no, they have hot ties. And ice cream, I think. Oh, thank you, Zah. Oh, wow. So Dana's up first, though. Yeah.

That went perfect, though, in the idea of having it be like 45 minutes long and then an eight-second chug. Yeah. Yeah. It's perfect. That's what we wanted. And how are the warm-ups for each team?

Do you guys drink before? I had two beers. I was a cold tub all morning, just my left arm. I feel good. Yeah, I warmed up all morning. And then I got these on, too, which are the black Air Force ones, aka the drive-by ones.

I feel good at them. I feel like doing something dangerous. Yeah. Okay. How many dogs you got left, Zach? I love our ump. Our hump is so official. He didn't bring enough to off. He said this is his 12th sport he's ever bumped.

I can help. You don't have to, you can. Yeah. The 12th sport he's upped? Yes. This is a special. How many other sports can you hump 12 sports? He's done 11 before this.

Okay, so this is 12. Yes. Okay. All right. Do we have Jay? Our half time? Oh, here it is. Here's our halftime. Oh, he's got a box helmet.

Oh, he's getting coached. He's getting coached. It's just like that for budget. Che, you're live. They got us. They got us, guys. Do you have blindfold on or no? Let's go.

What do you say? Do you have blindfold on? No, it's under here. So I'm going full vision to start. All right. So take a couple hacks. This happened yesterday, Jordan, naturally. And, Jay.

Where is he? That's not sluggers. No, he's in a bad in case. He pitches 100 miles an hour. He said yesterday that it would be easier to hit 100 mile an hour fastball with a blindfold on than a blindfold off. So, yeah, that's what we're doing here. He's got A.B.'s old helmet on, too. Okay, that wasn't even close.

Why is he? Yeah, but he's more. Do he found that all? Did he make contact? Good. How fast? How fast is this? We got to know how fast this is.

Ebo, how fast is this? So we're at 45 feet at 80 miles an hour, so 100 mile an hour equivalent. All right. Is the guy going to say go every time he does it when he's blindfolded? Thank you, sir. They were talking about doing like I'm raising my arm. Okay. Now.

That's fine, but he can't say go. Oh, nice. Did he make contact with one of those? He hit a rope, actually, that White Sucks Dave has. Oh, without the blindfold on, he hit a rope. Oh, that was contact. He's got a choking poke. It's a great halftime show.

It's a great half-time show. It's electric. Just behind that one. He's got kind of like a Luis Gonzalez open stance, too. I don't mind it. Oh, hey. That was a hit. There you, Che.

If you're hitting at that well now, imagine when you're blindfolded. You'd be fucking hitting dingers. that was contact again that's three contacts so he's not blindfolded right now not blindfolded oh oh see i thought he was no he was hitting this is the part he didn't want to do are you are you made contact on three of those and you hit one up the middle oh my god all right he's got to feel the bat yeah yeah he also texted tj today and was like or no. All right.

Blindfold. Che, you agree. You made contact three times there. All of them. We did some work. I made one real hit. Okay. Pretty good.

Okay. All right. So now let's go blindfolded. But he can't tell you, he can't say like go or swing. So normally, from what I've heard, there's like a countdown, like a D, the, they don't have this here. So he's just going to say like a ballop or something like that. It defeats the purpose. No?

On. E-bo shit. Dave. You can't get his gloves on. He's blind. Dave. I can't. You can't feel?

Got where his hands were? I can't see. I can't see. What? That's fine. Why do you need to see to do that? That's fine. Just put your swag, Jay.

Why do you need eyes for that? That is ridiculous. He's got a cup. He's got a cup, too. Where's the plate? Um, you're a little... You're a good. You're getting his own.

You wind up for me. Good start. Just say he didn't even move much. Yeah. Like good. Oh, hold on. Is it an unlimited amount of cuts, or how many does he get? We don't fucking know.

Yeah. 10. All right. So this is him blindfolded. So dumb. Oh, I did that one. Oh. Nope.

I give it down. Perfect. Yep, this makes sense. Oh, no. The line drive. The guy saying down makes it 20 times. Yeah, if you need a, he's announcing. I have a guy help you.

No, no, no. No, he has to hit, what, three more. It's over. You got to hit three more. You got to hit three more of their chain. You got to do three more. Also, stop saying, not saying down. Stop saying down.

Just let it go. No more down. Just him announcing the pitch. Him announcing the pitch. There's a plate here. You know where it is. He's going to see that to win now. Chewan.

Yeah, it doesn't matter what we say. He's telling him when to swing. He's literally telling me. He can't tell you on the swing. You kind of just got to go. All right. All right. Stephen back up a gas step.

No, towards it backwards. I want him to get hit so. Right there. Right there. Yeah, who's that. They're saying, don't say like down. Oh, they'll say that. So I guess let's just front and get on a regular cadence.

So I'll count down to, I'll count down to, I'll count down. I'll count down five. Yeah, natural conversation. You can't say it now, but you can say three times one. Natural conversation you'd be having with the opposing pitcher before batting. Three, one, two. What? She's doing the exact same thing.

She not understand. Tell the... One, two. Play, really. Split that. That was our whole point. You'll never know when the pitch is coming. Ebo, tell him just no count down.

Everybody shut up. Yeah, no counts. Just what you got to listen. Why is he shocked by that? I don't. The whole point, right? Yeah. Oh, God.

just try and go just put the fucking ball in the machine like it's not that complicated what the hell's going on he's going to say it's already over he's going to say he won

even though he hit like three hits with his eyes use of his eyes let's start let's start it on six what is what are we

Steve god damn all right half time show over yeah that's fine Get back out there, boys. Here we go.

Second half, second half. That on the ball. Oh, wow. He went right to it. We got the time. There you go. He's even faster. That's better.

That might be fast. Wow. Score of 55. Yeah. Wait. Do we let them molligan, too? I love our own. If they want it.

I think that was just a, that happens. Baseball. Yeah, that's basically. That's literally baseball. It's all just happened sometimes. Yeah. Dante's loving what you see you doing here. That's right.

They can walk it off right here though, right? They could. You can walk off game one walk out. Chompin at the bit to get into game two. That might be your game two starter right there. We might be looking at them right now. Well said. And then you're going to want to put it down.

Now, I have no idea how Jordan is. It's a ceremony of it. No. No idea. Tate, you can walk it off right here, right? If he beats 5559, it's a walk-off. It's a walk-off. Game one goes to home by three.

We get walked off. We're going to promise. Adjust my belly hush. Go good. Oh, wow, whoa. That's OK. I think you're good. I think you guys are good.

That's why we had the Agomatic. There was a little exfellage. 4650. That's a one. Oh, game one overtime? No. There would have been. If it would have been close, it would have gone to it would have gone to Dana.

Yeah, 5.5. There was just enough spillage that it would have gone to him. It was close. It would have gone to him. That's good off. Great off. Good up. I love that.

He's up 12 sports. This is 12. If he can't beat Dana, this is going to be a long series for them or short series. Yeah. All right. No, that's good. Is it?

Very fast. 5.4.1. Okay. Okay. Let's go, baby. That's Dana territory. That's Dana territory. Oh, you can handle the price.

I have a ball game. So this would be Dana's third beer. Send Greg. Send Greg. You could. Can I ask the Yulgomatic guy how that works? I don't think. Well, we're getting a review?

What's the rule? So does my time matter or does my score matter? Score. It's both. Both. combination baseball what is the what other metrics are involved aside from time volume he was asking does it matter if he slowly brings it up to start yeah you want a full get a little more get a little more i should just pour from here the um said there wasn't

enough beer in it even though it's very full this is so much pressure that's a great score to be in the clubhouse what's the what that'll give you a higher score well done we say the score to beat again 59 50 yeah can i can i root for the other one yeah i'm rooting for them okay good i think the funniest outcome i like don't buy three guys better what time are we going for what score what's the score to be okay that's too much i think dana losing in a seventh game at home would do you want right so put the fucking beer on let's go and this is two three two right we get yeah i think he's got to get lower Yeah, all you got to do is get a split on the road.

It's all we need is a split. Some very great sportsmanship going on. Yes, very nice. It's a long series. Wow. What a moment for Dana. What a moment. And that's just game one.

Yeah. You guys can come back in. All right. So game two tomorrow. Yep. Same lineups. Mm-hmm. You guys got to win.

I know. I mean, I have fucking Greg, Greg, Gucci, I know you're better than what you put out there on tape. I know. I already said it multiple times, but I had these trident gun in my mouth, this minty gum. What's fault was that? My fault, that's on me. Like, I got to do better than that. But the second that beer hit my mouth, I was like, I got stunned.

And then Katic up there was yelling at me. And I'm like, holy fuck. That's home field. That's what it is, right? Like, it's my bad. It's my bad. It is. You'll be better tomorrow.

Yeah, I'll be better better. No doubt. I'm worried about Greg. Yeah, Greg will not be better. No, he won't. He might be worse. Significantly. That's a guy who doesn't improve.

That's a great quote. Yeah. It's just nothing. It's so true, though. There's no improvement at all with him on any aspect. I thought he was going to demolish me when he picked up the cup slow. Like taking his time, I go, oh, no. He was talking with him.

Oh, no. It was. Yeah. I don't know why he did that. It feels like you guys got a little better, too. You got faster in the overtime. You know, I like her game. Yeah, I really do.

I think I have a coaching thing I want to talk to what my partner with. Is it because my shoes are on tied? Like, that was... No, you're fine there, but I think we're going to be all right. Okay. It would be all right. Game two, you know? And now it is time to reintroduce the starting lineups for today's contest.

First, the visitors for Homeby 3. from the east hampton projects aspiring tour tennis professional rob Gucci what wow and from verona wisconsin hovering around 200 pounds the windless jordan schmaltz oh that's a sick jacket that's a sick jack can we just root for them yeah i kind of want to root for them they're way cooler i do like them better yeah and now get loud and get proud and get on your feet for your hometown chuggers. Is the crowd over it? Yeah, yugging today for Team Barstool.

Make some noise for the green machine. Barstool Gray and Dana Beers. Hell yeah. Oh. Oh. What is incredible. Incredible. Boys just taking some grounders.

These bagpipes are the best. Now, ladies and gentlemen, we ask that you please rise if you are able, as we welcome the downtown voice from University of Illinois, Chicago, as they honor America with the singing of our national anthem. Oh, say, can you see by the dawn's early light? What's so proud? That's why. Who's brought stripes and bright stars through the peril?

Or the ramparts we watch were so gallantly streaming. And the robber sting. Dana Beers has something to set. Listen, guys. There's a lot going on in the world right now, as we know. Oh, boy. What we can always rely on is beers at the end of the day. They won't let you down.

They're always there for. you and I just want you guys to know we're bringing back beers in 2006. Let's have a ball game. Well said. What did that have to do with anything? I think he just has to speak before every game. All right.

Do we need to speak from Greg? Who's your guys' first drinker? Oh. Home team who we countering with. Wow, I think you just got us in them out. Oh, they're debating Greg's looking upset. We got a shot clock on this or not? Is Greg?

Ideated. Oh, Greg just ran. Greg ran. from it. Wow. Who we got? Me. I'll use that cup. Yeah. Let's get the ditty oil in it. Again, we're, we're actively rooting for the other team? I think so at this point. Yeah, I am. There are better boys. Not to put pressure on Dana or anything. Do we test the plastics good, right? Where is a room rooting for HB3 in this game? Yeah. I'll take Lucas.

You want me to take Lucas? What do you mean? What's the? Is that a great remove foam or no? No. No. We're so rooting for the other guy. We're rooting for them. We're rooting for them in this game. All right. Yeah.

What did he think you said? I don't know. I'll take loose. Gray's got to feel bad about that. Yeah. He's in the confidence. He's in the batters box.

He's like, hey, buddy. We know. No information. All right. Here we go. It feels great. I love the um what a move but he burned how many timeouts you get did he burn his only time out but it had to shake his opponent yeah you get one yeah one wow they're out of time out so

the rest of the way that's right that I had a burbs so that mean he's gonna be able to challenge later yes I think so well set you get your shit on I mean almost all let me know all right I'm good jor set I was born ready motherfucker let's go oh three. It's billage. Oh, no! What has happened? Greg will actually fight. He called a foul ball.

I don't want to do that. Wow. What do you mean? Wow. Wow. You call me off after I'm halfway down the beer. Yeah. No, what's the favorite strip bitch?

We're playing it again. Wow. He's calling hard. He's calling hard game. You got a hard game. There's spillage everywhere yesterday, and now you're calling it take game? Wait, did you realize people are watching the night?

All your buddy's called, you want to make a spectacle. I didn't even fill it to the top for you. Oh. It's not worth it. It's not worth it. If I had to fill it to the top, it would have been different. Go up another fucking sport. Oh, no.

No. He's going to 12th women. It could do. Wow. You want to go the other, you want to go Greg versus Gucci now instead and we saved that one for, because he just drank half a beer. So he's a disadvantage.

I've had enough time to rest. He's good. What's your fucking problem? That was a horny ball. You are lucky I have almost never given a red. I didn't want to start today. I don't want to give another yellow because that's like a red.

You take a Viagra? Slow down, dude. Why are you so horrid? We're going to fill this up. Oh, my gosh. We're going to I'll step in if you need me. But then again, this is the Yuggoff, man. I appreciate it. This is the fucking Yuggoff. Ultimately, they probably helped tell him by the-

I think we gotta let him finish no matter what and then you can call it after. All right. Wow. So you think I'm going on him go first? You want Greg? Just call me off after three-quarters of a beer? Yeah, hey, you want Greg and Gucci to go?

So you have a break? I think that's only fair. All right, let's do it. So Greg and Gucci. Got to go first. Yeah, yeah. But we're hoping. Are we just making up rules?

Yeah, I mean, it's our young off. Yeah. Yeah, no, this is who you go first this time. You got to go in a row? No, we'll let Greg go. We change in the order? Yeah, yeah, we'll let Greg and Gucci go. We'll watch the tape.

I just see that was a really call for slot. We did kind of egg on. We did. Yeah, there was a little wider. You guys' mouths weren't as big as I thought. Don't touch it. So I allowed it. He was a classic.

This is a plastic cup. What's Greg doing? Oh, he's on his knees. Oh, he's, uh, that was wondering where to help. Yeah, you're good. Thank you. Greg's going to his knee. Is he protesting something right?

What is that eye black? What is he's going for? I don't know. Horns on the eyes. Mustachioid horns. That's like asterine turn. What nature calls. The whistle, yeah.

I don't know which one you guys. He does look like Wallyji. All right, this is the first hat. But if Greg wins. Back to his knees or why. What are we going to see from Greg? What is this? That's terrible.

What's the time? 8-4-1. Oh, that's so bad. So bad, Greg. He shouldn't have that water before. Greg, that was so bad. What's this? Oh, the halftime show's not over.

No, this is Mincy trying to trick us. You know, the Jumbo Trom? Yeah, yeah. Sure. So yeah, follow the ball. Follow the ball. Of these. Okay.

Do you think he knows? No, definitely not. All right, it's on you, Mitz. Donnie is missing a chunk of his elbow, by the way. Oh, Donnie, were you a mascot? Yeah, that was no joke. What? Oh, boy, here we go, boys.

Here we go. Here we go. What? Okay. All right. How you're doing it. That's not. This is not how that.

All right. Not how it goes. Okay. There we go. All right. Still got it. Yeah. Uh-huh.

It's pretty easy. Yep. As easy as it gets, really. Oh. Oh, my God. Yep. Oh. Oh.

Yep. Oh, man. Okay. That's baseball. What is he? I think he's. What are you doing? I think he thought there was another ball.

there oh you might have lost me oh I might have lost it I think I lost it I got him he might have got me he's gonna show us I got him I got him you can see which one rolling yeah perhaps okay how long are you gonna all right I know which one it is yeah that's a AB isn't no I got oh that's in the middle the middle is it in the middle you got you Two. Okay, reveal. I started watching halfway through. Oh, thanks, Mincy.

Good job about Mincy. Times is not there. 617. 3, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 4. Overtime, overtime. We're back in overtime. Oh, this is better. This is better for them.

Is it? Oh, it seemed a little slow. This is better for me. Oh, that was fast. Way better for him. For a score of 4739. 47 309. Yeah, that's a huge.

Way to step up, Gucci. All right. 4739 is the first score. Dude, 53. You still have it right now. You still have the opportunity to get Greg out of the road. Let's go, Greg. It's all going to come down to Greg.

Greg. Part of me is thinking Greg wanted to piece so he could pull trig come out fresh. Yeah. Get loose. That man is scared. No, he's focused. The moment is too big for him.

I think Craig's got this. Is he like a sleep maybe? He's a sleep of the... He kind of always is in his brain. Is he off? He's in like standby mode? You know? Do not disturb.

Neurologically pending. The wheel is just spinning. I'm glad we're on the same page. What did you say, Greg? There's no improvement. That's a guy that doesn't improve. He is what he is. He's a finished product.

What? Is this entertaining? Oh, yeah. Yeah. That was not the time. Yeah, true. All right, Jordan, you got it? All good.

You set? I'm sorry. Ready? Nice. Pretty good. That looks strong. It's dragging a little. Nope, pretty good.

Six, two. For a six, two. score of 4-8-6-1. Ooh, okay. Their total is 9600 on the dot. 9600 on the dot. This is going to be great, so we're going to have a score to be.

Greg. Yeah. Come on, Greg. We're going to have a 20-yard field goal to make. But it's Greg. Come on, Greg. And that's what we're going. It's exactly what we want.

I can try and get you six. I need six. If I can get you six, you can get me home. I can get you home. What are we at? You're at 9600 flat. It's like in family feud when the first guy gets like 175. Yeah.

Gucci, great, great fucking chug. Thank you. A most improved player. Lights are never too bright. He reset. He's scared, too. That's the best part. We don't know what he is.

Yeah, no. If I can get, Greg, if I can get you 58. Oh, 58 ain't going to do it. And Greg is drunk. 38? and he's got to pee he's had about five or six years already this morning that's what I heard give me one second visualize and attack visualize drinking the beer visualized and attack oh wow wow oh my gosh four five six six five seven two

wow Greg don't fuck they just move the ball in the middle of field oh what does he need Greg needs three thousand twenty-do what is he do what is he All right. That's so attainable, buddy. Oh, Greg. Wow. Dana, what a move by Dan. Greg needs a 3,028 score.

For a tie. It's a tie. 3,029 to win. What did you get last time? Like 30, 38? Do you guys still have your time out? What do we need, change? 3,028.

He's going to get it. He's got to get it. He's got it, right? Yeah, he's got it. He's got to get it. Reset, we need to reset. I hope he does. Greg needs to win.

The lights are too bright. Tom, sometimes I have kids that come up and sometimes they're afraid to swing. I just want you to know, it's okay for you to go out there and give it your best, man. Tom also make sure. Love that. Love that. You just don't know your fucking job.

Sometimes you have to do that with some. You don't do that at all. Yes. Tom, make sure he doesn't spill. No spills. Greg. I don't want any spilling from Greg. No spills from Greg. Make it clean, Greg. Make it clean, Greg. Is that how he does arm circles? Natural.

You got injured in the Chinese workout yesterday. No spills, Greg. No spills, Greg. No spills, Greg. I don't like the on knees. How's the knee allowed to be grounded? Oh yeah, you can't ground the knee. Jayda just got his best time with a knee. His knee can be grounded like that? No. On the start? Think.

Yeah. There's no legal start. Really? Well, it doesn't have to go as far up. I mean. No, that's balled down. If he... Nope.

What? He timed out himself. Wow. So why was he on his knee? That's delay a game. That's delay a game. Tom, that's a delaying game. Lay a game.

Yes. Delay again. No, finish it. No, he said half. He said half of half. No. It did. It's a bader.

That was a batter's boss. Finish that beer, Greg. Hey, can you get one? You don't tell them what to do. You can't step down. You're on the Rules Committee? Right. I did this.

Hey, I did this. Hey, I did this. Right. You can't see it. You can't see. You're final. Let's go. You did not have a time out.

No. No. Oh, no. Oh, no. No. No. No. There is a pitch block.

And, hey, he's a whole timeout. There is a pitch clock to be. Yeah. Yeah, you can't step in and step out like that. You don't have a time out. Did you appeal at the time? No. Can we check me quite?

No. Tom, this is another delay. Yeah. Yeah, delay him again, Tom. Drink your beer. They don't have a time. Yeah. Yeah, put a head.

Fill it up. Listen, if you had a time out, Greg, you could have used it, but you don't have a time out. You're Chris Weber. Save your timeouts when you need them, man. It wasn't full for either. Do they call a timeout? No, they still have a timeout left.

You have a manager? Deutsch. Sure. Doge? Get in here. You can't call your psychiatrist. What is this? You got a mouth visit.

You only get one. Oh, Frank's home. Wait. Why are they caressing each other? I'm going to send that as my Christmas card. What are they doing? Those are two favorite people. Just hug.

Yeah. He's touching. Dude, the pressure is just killing. The pressure's killing Greg right now. Oh, Greg. I think that little half a cup fucked him. He's going to be as to be so bad. Greg, you got to go to.

Wait, wait, wait. Okay. You're a minute. It's a serious question. Once I'm serious. pick this up i go they can not call great the whistle doesn't call anything oh my god the rules of oh yeah tell you touch and we can call time out well that's right well until after what's this church what are you got bad thing to say about church oh i don't know they of us it but you're

let's not get political in here what do you leave you left right uh all right all right let's play a game don't ask him his political affiliation right now all right We're good. All right. Here we go. Are we set? Tom, my, time. Great time out.

Hey, that's baseball. That's a great time out. Oh, man. Oh, no, they're caressing again. That's, oh, that's an extra mound visit. Take him out. I don't know. Touch each other like that.

All can use a hug. You can't use a hug. I don't want to hug you. I'll give you a hug. Tom give you a hug. They don't say you want to hug. I'll hug anyone. What? You want a hug?

Yeah, get a hug. That's nice. It's a good hug. Well, how much money is he made today? That was a $1 bill. You don't have money. That's his. Oh, thank you, Dana.

We didn't know what he was doing. It was like caught red-handed. Aha. So ridiculous. This is for Greg. Greg did it. He did it. We put him to the limit.

Look at him. Look at this guy. I didn't want to see Greg win at all. No, I don't think anyone did, but we can't. I mean, the alternative is we'd have to make him drink like 15 beers. And he did. Brandon, he did pour the last bit on his face again. Again, yeah.

Oh, he's going to. He's going to. All right. All right, guys, get in here. And these teams are going to have to think about it until next year. Wow. is the horse. Tom, great job, Tom.

We wanted a ref show. We got one. The old Dave is coming back, though. I kind of like that. I have noticed that a little bit more in clips. You're seeming to dip more into old Dave. It's been hard to hate you recently. You're being a lot dumber.

You've been a mature man. How am I being dumber? No, whatever Danny said, mature. It's hard. It's hard to hate you because you're trying, get more mature. I respect it. You stop being a slob.

The beard's good. Yeah. The beard is. You still come in musty every once in a while. I think you forget to take your clothes out of the washer. Yeah. I just have a shitty washer. Okay.

Yeah. Really? You're actually musty? Yeah. Sometimes I'll notice it when I'm in here. It'll be a load of laundry that, like, sat in the washing. You know, Donnie Darko? Wait, wait a second.

Other people have noticed? You know, in Donnie Darker, like, there's that path where you could see people went. Yeah. I could find Dave anywhere in the office some days. And who knows. I was bad the other day after the Chinese workout. What? But a shitty washer make your clothes musty?

That just makes you dry. I think you have a front. No, the shitty, if you, I have a front load washer. Right. Okay. So water will stay in the basis. You keep your clothes in the washer when it's done for too long, I think. That's, yeah.

That's nothing to do with the quality of the washer. It'll do. When the washer gets done, you put it in the dry. And sometimes it really does. Brandon, Brandon, Brandon, Brandon. You're just wrong right here. I'm not. I promise you you're wrong.

The only way your clothes are going to get musty in a washing. of inequality is if they stay in there too long. That's exactly what I'm just right. So it's not a bad washer. It's not the washer. It's not the washer. You're the bad washer. You said it's a shitty washer. My washer, no matter what right now, stinks.

I guess if you're washed, yeah, you're washing. If you have a stinky wash, that's not a good walk. Hold on. Are you the wash? They're clean, but they reek. You wash and wash. Oh, I put my clothes in the stinker on that. I got a front load stinker. I got a front load stinker.

Hold on. He's got a stinker. Oh, I meant to clean my clothes. I made him stink. Technically clean, they just don't smell great. They've been washed. But what makes things stink? Bacteria.

I was getting there. If you guys don't let me. They do wash. I have a front load. They're clean as a whistle. Oh, my clothes are wet and sick. Just take a big whiff and it stinks. You're like, ma, that's perfect.

At least they're clean. They're clean. Oh, smells like shit. Perfect. Come on, Dave. I'm not. Does your significant other? It's no secret.

You have a significant other. Does she ever bring up the must? Constantly. Yeah, right. Yeah. Do you care if you're musty? You don't notice it right off the rip sometimes. What?

But you notice. What? I was trying to explain. I have a. I think. think I would assume it's the washer dryer unit that was originally built into the house. So it was built in 2005, call it 20 years. The, when I close the washer, what the fuck is so funny?

I can bend that knee. All right. When I wash clothes and take them out and put them in the dryer, there's still water that sits in the basin. There's still water that sits in the basin of the front load washer. that if I close the washer door by habit, it'll stink up the entire thing. Okay. Okay.

But what I'm telling you is, if you took them out immediately when the wash was done and put them in a dryer, I don't think it would have that musty smell. So, so then what's the point of saying everything you just said if you still just leave your clothes in there for too long and they get the mildew smell?

Like you're trying to blame it on the washer, but you're also saying you leave your clothes in there. Yeah, no, it's a two-part problem. The washer still is cold. I have fully admitted to leaving the clothes in the washer. That's what makes the smell. Yes, that's what makes it. But if everybody knows, hold on, hold on, I'm not done it.

Everybody knows makes a clothes smell bad, right? Correct? Yes. Okay. Now, since I have a front load washer, meaning I open the door from the side, not the top. Do you understand the physics behind this? Water will stay in the washer sometimes, and if I close the door and it can't evaporate out, then it'll stink

up the whole washer for like weeks and I have to get tablets and bleach and extra shit to clean it out. But answer this. Yes. If you got a brand new washer, a top load. A top load. I would not have near the issue. If you left them in the washer for too long, they would still stick

exactly the same. Right. Probably, yes. However, however, this washer also has a perma odor because it's so old and so shitty. But, okay, answer me this. If you, when you heard it, ding, it's done, you took them out and put them in the dryer,

they wouldn't stink. Not, no, you're good. Right. Yeah. I don't know your money situation, so don't, but washers aren't expensive. I'm, compared to what they are. I'm doing other, I got a roof to pay for two now.

Right. $400 where you can probably get us a low-end. I've, low-end. If I'm doing it, I'm doing it right. I'm spending a few grand. You're not doing it. It's on it to do it. I don't at least going to take a few grand to get a nice washer.

I've already talked to Maggie and sells it because her husband works with a company that sells washers and dryers. And if I want a decent one, it'll be about $3,500. No chance. Yes, it will. No fucking chance. A decent one? A decent one.

A washer and dryer, yes. A washer dryer combo because that's what fits in my house. $1,500. But Dave, you're comfortable walking around stinking. Do you need that's $3,500? Yeah, like, that's what I was quoted. You're okay. Like, I would say, once a week you smell pretty bad.

That's way too much. That's way too much, yeah. I mean, I'm walking a mile to the laundromat before walking. You don't notice that when he put it on? No. And once a week is a gross embellishment. Come on. What do you think it is?

No, he's fine today. I sat next. That smells very good. He smells good today. I sat down to him today. But there are some days. And I don't think I'm the first person to say this. You are actually the very first person at ever said.

That's not true. You leave a betrayal. Eddie says it. I've never heard Eddie said it. Is Eddie here? Eddie! Thank you. So when you wash the clothes,

you leave them in the washer too long, they're musty. As you're taking them to the dryer, you can't smell the must. No. You never smell the must. You don't smell it until you wear it to work. If you leave them in for like,

if you leave them in for like multiple days in a row, you would, yeah. So you don't notice anything until next like you smell mustard. I think the heat unlocks it. The heat definitely unlocks it. Yeah. So when you pull them out of the dry,

Do you smell the must? When do you smell the must on your clothes? It's usually, I swear to God, it's usually when I'm in the office, I'll be like, oh, this shirt's fucking reeks. What was the word you're going to say? Stinks. Okay. I don't think I've ever been like, holy fuck. Have you ever noticed it, Danny?

Yeah. Has Chief ever noticed it? Yeah. I don't think he's ever. Eddie's coming down. Do you use dryer sheets or anything? I'm fresh out of them right now It's on the to-do list

I was going to I swear to That one's on the ment It's on the list It was on that one's in the met Because I was doing laundry yesterday And I'm like I'm out of dryer sheets I need to order them right now

Did you take your clothes out of the washer in time? That time I did yeah Okay I and when I say on time It's got to be like the buzzer's got a ding If I don't if the buzz doesn't ding There's nothing else we could do But buy a $3,500 washer

Ed, you know what we're talking about? Are you talking about Dave having the mildews? You call it the mildews? You know what I mean. That's the affliction. That's a thing. The mildews? He said nobody's ever brought it up.

He said, yeah, he said, this was the first time anyone's ever brought up. But like, you weren't offended when I was, I thought, if that was the first time you heard it, and somebody told me I had an odor every once while, I think I would have been, like, offended, but you didn't seem surprised at all. Yeah, you weren't taking it. I don't give a shit. Yeah, I don't care. I don't want to label a smelly guy.

There was just a time where, like, you knew your clothes that smell. Yes, I know. And there's been times when I've been in this office, too, and it's because of the exact situation we're talking about right now. Yeah. And your front-loading washing machine. You've noticed the must every once in a while? Yeah, you got a case of the mildews once in a time.

Yeah. I know. Yeah. And what's, it's, it's, the smell is familiar, though. It's when you leave your clothes. accidentally. Yeah, it's not like a foul It's not a dirty guy. It's a clothes order. Correct. Right. It's not your body at all.

It's just everything's surrounding. The clothes you choose to put it on. You used to have it a lot worse, I think. So that's why I don't know if it's a machine. I swear to God, I have scrubbed the fuck out of this thing multiple times. It's got a rubber rim around it. You should have seen it when I cleaned it the first time. It was a horror site. Yeah. With like mold and shit. So it's clean now. It's as clean as I can get it

Yeah. Until I get a new washer and dryer. I'm curious how it looks. You've probably seen it before. When it's pooled up? Oh, it's like a quarter inch of water at the bottom maybe. I think most washers have... I don't really understand.

You said the physics of the... Does water not go to the bottom of a top loader? It drains through the bottom. So you don't have a drain in your washer? I don't know why it pulls up like that, no. Wouldn't it... Hmm. Right?

It's different. Crazy? It's different. Do you have a top loader? I have a top loader. Then sit back. If you've had a front loader, you know what I'm dealing with. I have a front loader. How old is it?

Two years. Okay, so it's newer. It's called 20. It's called it one. Yeah, a 20-year-old washer and dryer is pretty old. I don't know that it's that old. I would assume it's that old. It was there since I bought the place.

When did you buy the place? Four years ago, almost to the day. It was April 1st, 2022. Has it been a problem for four years? Yeah. But it works perfectly otherwise. It works perfectly. It's not too loud.

Nope. And your clothes come out clean. Clean. They just... Exactly. They're just... Here and there. You'll have...

Just an odor. This is almost... That's very clean. Here and there means when you leave them in too long. Yeah, but the washer itself has a perma odor. But don't you... Because you keep leaving the clothes in too long. Don't you think having an odor on them makes them not...

You can't close a front loading washer when there's no clothes in it. Because it traps the humidity and shit in and then it gets all molding. D and mildewy and stinky. You can do that if you close it. Top Loading dryer, it doesn't do that. My pussy's clean. It just has a perma odor. If you played the blame game, how much is on the washer versus how much is on, not taking it out on time?

It's like 50-50. No. Why would you shut the lid on the front loader? How is it any different than a top load? I still don't understand that. Get a front-loader and- I have a front-loader. I don't have any issues with my front-loader.

Like you say when you shut the lid on a front loader, it locks everything in. Would it not do the exact same thing on a top loader? No, because everything comes out the bottom. But what did it? But don't they all? Yes. I have a drain. Gravity, brother.

I know. When you, I don't, when you shut the door on my fucking dryer, it, it stinks it up. The only difference is where the hole is. That's the only difference. The rest of the machine drain there. Every washer drains to the bottom. Run is to the bottom. Yes.

And would it shutting the lid on a top loader? whatever locking in properties of shutting the lid, wouldn't that apply to the top loader? Like it would lock in all the mold and mildew and everything? I don't know. Then why do you say it only happens because you have a front loader? It just makes sense to my head.

I don't know. It's because you have a washer with a bad drain. No, because he leaves his fucking clothes in there too long. That would happen with a pristine brand new washer, top loader even. Yeah, you're saying you blame half of it. on the fact that you have this washer problem but then you're also admitting it wouldn't be a problem

at all if you took your clothes out of time. It's not what I said. Yes, it is. It's what you said earlier. From the day that I have owned this house, it has been a stinky washer. You've been going on four fucking years of stinky washer? I've had a lot of other shit. I've had to take care of

first. In four years? Yeah. He had rats getting in his car. That's true. Not. Nuts. They chewed up my fucking electrical shit. A rat's got into your car. We go to his house. He's rat traps everywhere. Everywhere.

Outside. In the alley. That's not true. We had a guy. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, okay. So what I said is there's still rat traps in this. What did you just say?

Do you hear yourself? He said you have rat traps. You said that's not true. We had a guy come put the end. That's exactly what he said. But he implied that there's constantly rat traps. We had the guy come over for a video to put the rat traps in. There's not like there was always rat traps

He didn't imply that there's always rat traps in the alleys He said that's not true We had a guy put rat traps in the air I heard I heard there's rat traps everywhere And the reason there's rat traps there is because That Fasoli looking kid that we did the video with Where you, I don't know if you were in that video Was it?

Is the video up? Can we see the Fasoli looking kid please? To be fair to Dave, I know what he's talking about Yes Yeah but to be fair to me I wasn't lying at all Yeah but I think What the fuck is you saying that the consistent presence of rat traps may not be accurate.

I just said there was rat traps everywhere. No, Danny said there are rat traps. He said, that's not true. We had a guy come put rat traps in. That's exactly what happened, but there's rat traps because somebody put them in. Rat traps.

I was referring to, you said there's a lot of other things you had to take care of first, and I was including the time when there was other rat traps. But like, you're content in the past four years just stinking every once in a while? At the office, I don't give a shit yet. What do I care about? You wear clothes elsewhere.

Here, here. Here. What do you care at the office more of people you see every day as opposed to, like, going out to a dinner with people will never see again? I could not care of flying fuck less. But I'm saying if you don't care at the office that you don't care anywhere. I would, first of all, if I'm out in public, it's going to be, it'll be a nicer shirt that, like, was not going through that wash, typically. And also, I watch the nicer shirts. Where do you wash the nicer shirts?

A dry cleaner? You go to a dry cleaner? I don't, yeah. I got to pick up fucking shit for Donnie today, actually. What's like that? I have a shipment of dry, clean clothes that I have to pick up. Some of which are Donnie's that I had to wear of his from when we were in Istanbul a couple of weeks back. Yeah, we investigated his whole house one time, this whole apartment.

To find the smell? No, just like everything. Like, I think the most shocking thing I found was that you're a window open guy without a screen. Like, you just leave it like open. It's on the to-do list. I don't mind that. On my, uh, on the Juliet balcony. In the back?

No, in the back. There was no screen. I got that window replaced. Ed, you're getting all the angles, man. This was a dream, dude. What? I want a POV. What?

Nice how loud. He also stepped through his tub. He had to take care of that. That was the first thing I had to do. What did you do? Did you have a men's one label on your... That was... That was the old office.

Canna tuna? Lovely. He loves tuna. You got you some bacon. Can never have too much bacon. We couldn't find a pumpkin like your old place, so we got your Korean melon instead. That's better. It was an issue.

Yeah. How does a foot go through a tub? That's a great question, Kate. I was taking a shower and the original builder's built a place like complete shit. Okay. And they put the tub on, there was two by fours on both ends of it and nothing supporting in the middle. So from the 20 years or so. It worked for 20 years, but then.

Literally the week I moved in. My foot literally goes through the bottom of the tub. It looked painful. Final fantasy. So your foot was dangling in like someone's ceiling? There was like... Final destination. It was like this much into like six inches maybe until the plywood that separates our units, yeah.

You sent a picture. Yeah, I'd love to do that. When did you move in? I think it was April 1st, 2022. So almost four years. So there had to be like within the... Full April. Yeah.

Yeah. I got you with the prank. tub. April 1st. Yeah. It was on April 1st. They paper macheted your tub. I fell through the tub.

It was instant insurance claim that I still had to pay a shit ton of money for to redo my whole fucking bathroom. Jesus. Yeah, it was bad. Does this house give you fits? All the fits. Wait until you own a house. It's everywhere. It's everyone.

It's everyone. We didn't even talk about the blinds guy from Lowe's. That guy. I want to kill that guy. The blinds guy? I sold you blinds or he couldn't see? He sold me blinds and he struggled with the entire process. He fucked it up, the measurements, everything. Yeah.

Had to send him back multiple times. It was a pain in the ass. God damn, man. I'm sorry. No wonder you're so on edge all the time. Homeownership's a bitch. You keep saying that. I own a house, but my clothes don't stink.

right but it's not going through your bathtub but it's not going through my bathtub I don't have rat traps everywhere like that's city a guy put him there Brandon there's okay anyway I don't think it's just home ownership

you're going to have rat traps around fair fine fine fine but like if a washing machine is broken or stinks when I get there it's not going to stink four years later it stinks 5% of the time but you're close 100% of the time they don't smell 100

Brandon just smelled it. So then it's very obviously not the fucking washer. Not every single time. Because I have to scrub it out every fucking week with all the special shit. How could it be the washer if every time you do it, it's not like. It doesn't make any sense. Okay. You can't blame the washer.

It's not the washer. It's just not the washer. You can't blanket blame homeownership. A lot of homeowners out there that don't have these issues. Ed, what percentage is? No. How often does you have the millies, would you say? It used to be more.

It used to be that damn Supreme Lobster shirt. Like, you saw that. You had a stinky shirt? That, you got a shirt that you went all the time. It was a stinky shirt and you wore it a lot. I have many of those shirts for the record. Maybe stinky shirts? No, many of the exact Supreme Lobster.

It was the Chicago flag, but there was a lobster instead of the stars. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Oh, shit. You have fun of me for wearing that shirt too much, which I, I, I, I, I can't wear it anymore. We all got one, but I might be wearing a Day Williams jersey. I have, yeah, true. I have multiple of that exact shirt.

And you also have a couple of shirts that you wear constantly that I've noticed. One of them being the Mallor's hoodie. Oh, I don't wear that at all. You wear that all the time I've noticed, which is fine. And I'm on the show every day. Please dig and show a compilation of many times of war, a black more hoodie. There's another one that I've noticed because you've made fun of me. I'm like, Danny.

Yeah, but they don't smell. Sorry. A big caveat. Dave. Dave, do you agree? Do you concede some ground that your Supreme Lobster T-shirt was the stinking one? Yeah, that one stinks to high heavens. It's also a workout shirt of mine.

So it'll be like completely soaked in sweat on top of the mildew. Yeah. I haven't worn that shirt. When's the last time you see me wear? No, yeah. I think we called you out. we haven't seen it since. Yeah, partially, you haven't seen it sense partially because of you calling me out for it and partially because of that.

You gotta hang it up sometimes. Kate, I get, this is your exact type of guy. I completely get it. But I want to fix this. I want to come do my laundry? All the, all the, all you, I'll give you my keys. What has your, what has your girlfriend said about the stink? She hates it.

Yeah. I bet. There's nothing that she. She likes about it? Yeah, she hates it. So, like, you'll go over to her place. Will she, like, immediately tell? She doesn't have a, she doesn't have a washer dryer at her place.

But I'm just giving a hypothetical. I'm sorry. You go over to her place and you have, like, your must. Yeah. Will she immediately say something? Yeah, she'll yell at me. What does she say? Your washer dryer sucks, like, go stop leaving your shit in too long?

Okay. So why don't, again, you keep making that a compound sentence. Yeah, right. Your washer dryer sucks because you keep leaving your stuff in. I think it's 20 years of people leaving shit in too long where it has a perma odor, but at the same time, I also add to the problem. I would say you're the majority of the problem. Wait a second.

Wait a second. There you go, Che. Here we go. I forgot who's there. Your girlfriend does not have a washer dryer. So does she use yours? Out of like desperation for like hoodies and shit, you will. Right.

Not for like good clothes. There's a follow-up question here. Do she? Do her clothes then stink? I don't know. I never smelled them. Then no. Then the answer is not.

If you've never smelled them, then no. Right. So now we're getting back to operator. Go ahead, Brandon. No. She just says, it's not one of the five percent. She's a magician. It's not one of the five percent.

The washer just decides five percent of the time. This will be the time. A slot machine. Dave. Would you sign off on this? Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.

Okay. We'll just be quiet, I guess. You can keep talking, but don't ask me a question because I'm... Also, where does she take? her other laundry she's only doing hoodies at your place she's not she comes over the bag of of hoodies you're my favorite guy on her babe yeah i gotta come over my hoodies my hoodies are ripe oh it's hoodie day here she comes with these fucking hoodies hope it's not one of the five percent where they're gonna reek hope you get lucky

Do you have camera on the golf simulator? Because I was like, it's kind of annoying that someone's driving during the act. Yeah. The only rule we have. Whoa. They loosened her up. Who is that? It's the FedEx driver.

Yeah. No way. Fair enough. He's getting pissed at us. Let's the man swing. Who had to say something. I was like, wait, what the fuck? I fucking.

That is the most alpha move Ever. I can't say anything to him. I thought it was going to be like, you know, like Ebo or someone. I was like, hey, can you just stop driving? You know, hit wedges. Dude, if somebody looks at this area and they see their packages got delayed another day. This silhouette looks hard.

What do you say to that? What the fuck can you say to that? You have no power over him. None. Got some men. Hell yeah. Oh, shit. Does he have a glove on?

No, you planted him. I do not. I swear to God. No way. I swear to God. Hell yeah. Oh, fuck. Fuck yeah.

Oh, that is so fucking funny. Is he playing in 18? That rocks. Have a play in with chain T. Yeah. Yeah, that's good. Wait, you have to. Winter plays.

Yeah, winter plays. We should get a UPS guy in here. Oh, my God. The DHL. We got a lot of golf going on. Did you just switch clubs? Yeah. Yeah.

Went to the bag. All right, good. I will say our delivery guys put in work. Yeah, they do. When I saw was him, I was like, I'm not telling him to stop. You get you going. I don't give a fuck. It's Friday afternoon.

Get a fucking shot. Get a couple shots in, dude. That rock. I didn't know what to expect when you were like panned him and that was not it. No, when I stood up, I was like, no fucking way. That's so. I thought it was going to be Stefan. Oh, man.

That also would be someone I wouldn't tell the stop. My fucking head cut off. Listen, it's a lake full of bass. It's the same fish. It's not the same fish. They look pretty similar. They're just, they're similar-sized fish. If you look at the barcode on the side of them, they're different.

different. The QR code, whatever. The spilling of fish kind of ruins it. Nah. You know. I quite liked it. And also, I was wearing that shirt yesterday. Remember?

Remember? You remember? No. Remember? I was wearing it. Is that Elvis? That's Conway Twitty. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Conway Twitty. Oh, yeah. When did you get that shirt?

The best part of what you used it, like, your shirts are funny. Oh. You don't have to say anything. We just know because your shirt's there. This is like, oh, here comes this guy. I got the gist. Funny shirt is the guy I want to hang when. And then wait until you see the socks.

If you think my shirt's funny, let me take you south. I had to toe hilarity. He doesn't have to say shit. He just shows up and it's fucking. The funny thing is I'm a grown man. Is anyone else there in the Benny Hill music as soon as he'll look at him. Was it a look a turn?

I had to call this guy over. The goofy guy at the bar table. Okay. His face is that of a man's, but I didn't know how a topic still was a shirt. Holy fuck. Now this man.

I thought this guy was a serious guy, but I'm seeing his shirt. And it looks like it's got the Muppets on it? What? Zinga. This kind of. Holy shit this guy's funny

I didn't think that guy was funny but then I saw a sandlot t-shirt with macho man lady savage socks now wait a second you're a real

jokester I thought this guy was all business and then I saw Coco beware on his shirt stern stern face formal she oh i don't want to mess with this guy oh Oscar the garage

now what those don't go together I was going to be intimidated by this big man but then I just take a look I see Alvin Simon Antheon all right I can let my guard down this is a good hang

oh no A Hawaiian shirt in Chicago I actually feel bad It's good riff It's good riff Where'd this riff come from I don't know I don't know

I don't know Ugh Oh Oh Make us laugh tomorrow Get your best socks shirt combo and make us

fucking keel over in laughter. No, no. Please. No, I'm just going to dress like everybody else tomorrow. Please. Please. Hit us with a big bird that we never saw coming. Oh my God. A blindside

big bird. It changed the whole course of a week. Who is this a well-to-do straight shooter? Oh bananas with faces I retract my previous statement

Donkey Kong and sunglasses What? Just walking around like patched Door to door Yeah All the sick kids are just Hey, I heard your dime, but look at my shirt Yeah, hey, check out this shirt

I don't even have to say it yet. See it around. Take it easy. Oh, man. That's good stuff. I really like that. That's really good stuff. Boy, do I like that. That was good fucking stuff.

You just know he's got big polka-up boxers. Yeah. Oh, you didn't think about the boxers. Big poker-out boxers. Yeah. burgundy polka. I was having a bad day till I saw snap crackle and pop.

Thanks, Brandon. Danny, you're going for a lot. I missed the first half. I'm going to figure out what you're talking about. It's about me wearing graphic t-shirts. I had a picture of a fish. I was

wearing a Conway Twitty shirt and off they fucking went. We just took the ball and ran. We were a forest gum. Just fucking 80 yards to the house. What'd you expect? Did a little Dion High step there, too, for a second. That's good. Brinna, we do the reset? Let's do the reset. If you come in tomorrow

wearing a solid gray shirt, I'll be pissed. Oh, I'll be so mad. What happened? I don't want to do a whole spring break recap, but was there anything of note in the Roan After show? He's screaming right now. Nikki Smokes is screaming right now. Right now? He's screaming at the top of his lungs.

Who else has fucked? Who else here has no one's fuck? I got to say it's like it's it's like waiting for the next pope. Like I'm waiting for Nikki smokes to fuck. Like I need so bad. It's about as fun as waiting for the next pope too. Every morning I wake up and I'm like, oh, he didn't fuck. Did the white smokes come out?

Damn it. Yeah, we want it so bad. It's so funny that he's putting this type of pressure on himself where he's like he's having to do multiple press conference. He's like, yeah, I didn't fuck, all right? but who else fucked? It's so funny. But like has he had the wool over our eyes too? Does he just not fuck?

Maybe he's fuck. He does put himself in a bad spot where he's like, like Tommy smokes talks to a girl and everyone's like, holy shit Tommy smokes. The problem is you can go back like 12 hours and Nikki Smokes has a clip of him being like, it's demon time, I'm about to get in the game, I'm about to fuck everything. And then it's flash forward to watching Wake Up Barstola at a strip club. And there is.

A large percentage of his content that's put out is fuck oriented. Yeah. Yeah. He's a feed. He's like the fuck content. You're the fuck guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Basically be like, I'm not watching football next year. Yeah. He's not fucking. No, no. Because yesterday. Nikki's folks personally guaranteed they'll bring a girl home to the sweet tonight.

Yeah. And then at 6th of the morning, he's like, it's bullshit that everyone says that I have a fucked. He texted me. I guess he was watching bars, wake up barstolesoles. from a strip club because he texted me at 728 a.m., fuck you. Oh, okay.

It was mad that we talked about him in negative terms, I guess. I do want to watch this clip of him screaming. I really feel like you got fucked over here. Who here is fuck? What's the matter?

Yeah, I'm good, Kelly. Thanks for asking. Can you just give us a little, like, are you mad? Go off. If you want to bitch us out, bitch us out. I'm straight. I don't get a little.

What about you? Joel online said, Ask Nikki Smokes why he always claims he can activate demon mode and never does. His entire persona is the guy that picks up girls and yet even when his boss specifically instructs him not to, he can't leave his ex alone. He's getting out fucked by the guy on the right.

You tell me what the fuck demon time is, wrong? Like, what else is everyone doing here? Right. Like explain this to me, right? So I wake up, ass crack of dawn. I'm full sending. I don't sleep. I don't take naps.

I'm fucking balls to the wall, getting fucking after it the entire fucking time at the fucking strip club till 6 a.m. Right? That's not demon time. Why? Because I didn't crack some fucking blonde bitch last night. Like, what about everyone else?

Who here's fucked? No one's fucked, right? No, exactly. But if I don't fuck, I'm not going fucking demon mode. You don't want me talking to my ex-girlfriend. I'm fucking hammered. Have you seen her fucking body?

It's fucking insane. I can't fucking help it, bro. I'm a fucking male. I see her when I'm fucked up. I'm trying to get in that. I don't know what the fuck you want for me, bro. If you don't want me around her, then fucking just set me on a solo fucking mission.

Keep me the fuck away from her if it's such a fucking problem. Because I don't understand what the problem was. Like, no one else has anything going on. Nothing. Nothing. Because they're all on my fucking dick. For what?

Because I, Because I chirp up my fucking ex-girlfriend tree when I'm faded. Fuck you. Have you forgotten how to fuck? No, bro, I got a grown dick. Like, I don't know how to fuck. Like, it's what I do. Is it weird, like, being around my ex?

It's not what you do. It's actually not what you do on this trip. Okay, so now I don't get pussy. This is what we're doing. On this trip? No, no, no, no, no. Listen, it's a long week. Smokes.

Have you ever fucked in Nevada before? And Nevada? Yeah. No, I got a hand job at a music festival, though. Okay, so you're in Nevada Virgin. Yeah. Damn. All right, we're going to fix it.

We're going to fix it. Folks, we all think you're big league talent. It's just you got the yips right now. We're thinking maybe we send you back down to the minors for a rehab start as all. Just like kind of get your confidence back. Get some swings. Like a four? Yeah.

Would you be willing to fuck in the minors? Yeah. I don't want to just like crack some deep. bitch. How was that what you stopped? Right. You've said a lot worse. You said way worse.

So wait, if you could have, if you, you had the opportunity to sleep with somebody you weren't attracted to, do you think your standards are too high right now? You just need to get back on the horse? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And also, like, when you're fucked up, it's hard to get your dick up if you're not attracted to her.

Right. Right, right. Swing with a donut. Has that been a problem? So you've, like, gotten, you've got, you've got. women to bed, but you just haven't been able to get your dick up? Well, I brought like Seattleis, but I just haven't been in like the situation

to fuck. Because I guess I got no pussy. Yeah. You're really down, man. This is brutal, dude. Yeah, I am. I take this and you go up himself each morning. Well, I mean, I don't want to put any added pressure. Eddie, what's up? Added pressure, but like

I feel like eventually like this is going to come back on the office where it's Like, we got a guy who doesn't fuck. So we got to figure out a word of what? Wasn't this a problem last year at the Jersey Shore? I put meat on two different people. What the fuck's he talking about, Nikki? I don't even know.

Tides out. Come on, Titus. I miss that, dude. I thought that was the story. He put meat on two people. The way I heard it, you put meat on nobody. He put meat on two people. I put meat on people back to back nights

Back to back nights They went back to back meat That was honestly Folks weren't you slow out of the gate there though Slow out of the gate In Jersey Shore Am I misremembering Wasn't it? Didn't it take you a few days to get going?

I got called a rapist the first day No I know no no no not that though But did you fuck the first weekend in Jersey show I didn't fuck till Yeah end of week too Yeah what I'm saying Just get the back going It's a long season dude

You don't bench your starting quarterback after one start. Right. Like, let the dog play in the backyard a little bit. Jesus. Is that what you're going? Right. Okay. You want to fuck ass.

That's why you should think about maybe guys. Bro, I'm not swinging that way, dog. Stop playing with me like this. Oh, my God. He's really fucked up. He's black. He's black now. All right.

That might help. Okay. Wait a minute. Oh, dude. We go back to him. This is fucking ridiculous. Is you crying? At the idea of gay sex?

The agony. That is pretty straight. Wait, that's the straightest thing ever. The thought of gay sex brought me to tears. We got to drop tortilla on it. Oh, yeah. All right, smokes. This is why we called you.

This was all. Buddy. You got to pick yourself up. Nick, it's not that big of a deal. We all believe in you. That's kind of nice. Oh. There we go.

There we go. We all know you can fuck. We know the other guys in there aren't going to fuck. We had a constant rate of you. A lot of limitations going on. And think about that. Listen, like, when you fuck, you got all of us behind you fucking. All of us are behind you fucking as well.

We're holding onto your hips. So do you want, do you want, like, us behind you when you're fucking? Yeah. Would I be coming for all of us in this scenario? Yes. Dude. You come, we come. Remember, our come inside you.

I'm going to come for the boys. That's right. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. You know my comments. Coming for the boys. Yeah.

Coming for the boys. Not gay. Maybe parentheses, he's not gay, but coming for the boys. Right. All right. So you want to tell them about it? All right. So Vegas doesn't just have nightclubs.

It doesn't just have all strip clubs. It has like conventions and people are in town, right? We found a convention that I believe starts in a couple days, maybe Wednesday. I don't remember when it starts. I think it's Wednesday, Thursday, Thursday, Friday. It's the National Tortilla. Thursday, Friday, Saturday. Thursday, the National Tortilla Convention.

was telling me about this. The what? It's like that. I told you. They have money. They have money. Wayne Beach. Yeah.

The Tortilla Industry Association, 2026 annual convention. We looked at it. We think it'll be ripe for some pussy. Will you go take care of that? If there's hose there, I'll be there. Okay. Perfect. Yes.

And tortillas. I like that. You like tortillas tape? I like, we'll go. What did the stripper tell you? Yeah. She, like, I make my entire year's salary at the, tortilla convention.

It's the second all-star. It was along those lines because I've had no pussy, so I basically just gave her $100 to sit on me. That's good, dude. You see one go through the hoop? Yeah, how'd it feel? It's like a free throw. She didn't even give me a lap dance. She literally just sat on my lap. Oh. We just talked

and I got to know her. Wait, she just sat on your lap? Yeah, literally. It was like a therapist that was hot as fuck. See, sports psychologist. Yeah. And then I was like, is this like your busy season? And she's like, yeah, there's a lot of conventions going on right now. And then she told me about the tortillas.

See? Man, it's travel. Yeah, we spotted that one. Okay, so you're going to go get pussy there? Smokes. Could it get to a point where you're willing to pay? Oh. Everyone pays for pussy.

Wow. That was deep. Damn, dude. That was profound. I would never, I would never. I would never pay him for 20 years. if that makes sense. It didn't.

Nope. Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I'm down to pay for dinners, but like, I, I, I, I don't feel comfortable, like, telling a girl, hey, here's $100. That's fuck. What about, what about if we, like, uh, I'm sure you have, like, ex-girlfriends. We flew one out to live in the same, like, sweet as you an ex-girlfriend. I mean, yeah, we have great sex. Like, I'd love to do that. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Are you, are you guys sending out more girls? We might. I have no idea. I'm not part of the girls sending out process. You've got to fix your attitude first. You've got to get in the fucking frame of mind.

You're in an angry frame of mind. What about the hair? Are you worried that maybe that? What are you doing? What are you doing? He's all fucked up, man. Was the hair a mistake, do you think? Do you think women do not find you attractive because you've dyed your hair?

Oh. Okay. Smokes, you look great. Is it the cameraman? I mean, it is hard to pull bitches and like with a camera guy right behind you, but it doesn't matter. Like, I'm good at what I do, and I'm just in a fucking slump right now, and I just, I got to just fucking, just let me play ball. Have you asked Tommy Smokes for any tips? No.

Oh, no. He had a couple, couple chicks last night. Yeah. He had multiple. I don't know if he saw that. Would you let Tommy smokes, like, would you, like, slurp up some trickle down? Yeah. pick up his loose change.

Are they serious? Reaganomics. Starts at the top, man. This is what they're on about right now. Aren't you guys all fucking married? Not all of us. Yeah, dude, that's why it's so important that you fuck. Yeah, we need to live for us.

We want me to fuck for you. Yes. Look between your legs. We want you, but we don't need you. We need you to. We need you to. I don't want you to feel like. You need to.

Look between your legs. That's Eddie's cock. That's our dick. That's Eddie's cock. It's all of our dogs. You hear that? That's Kate's cock. That's Kate's cock.

That's Kate's cock. Come for the boys. Come for the fuck for you too, Danny. Which one? Come for the boys, smokes. Danny, you got to get you got to get him right, dude. Him not fucking for the boys. Thank you.

If it gets to a point, could smokes invite his own girl there? Oh. Hmm What'd he said? That would be brilliant Can you invite your own girls out? I think the only way you could do that is he liked it He could invite a girl out but he

But the first night the girl has to party with everyone else Yeah And the girl's probably gonna fall for Tommy Smoke Yeah No there's smokes Are they playing about my hose? Are you Are you guys playing about his own?

We're not playing about his hose That's crossing a lot We're not playing about your hose Not playing about your hose Not playing about your hose Are not playing about your hose are watching this being like, it's crazy. Oh my God, dude.

He has been like this. Broke. Yeah, he is. We cheer your black ass up. He wants to see you, KB. I'll put a meat on something for you. Yeah. I'm going to call her Fowler as I'm blowing her back out.

Oh, no. I don't need you to. I like you as a guy. I hate that you feel the need to. Smokes. Tortia Fest smokes. He's actually pounding. Are you guys allowed to go rogue during the day?

Like, can you guys leave the group and go do your own thing? Because I do feel like if you go off on SideQuest and then you meet a lady during the day and you invite her out that night. Like, I feel like everybody should have to invite some, like meet people and invite people. I like that. Hey, Kate, would you get close? Clapped on camera? It's a simple question. Or is yours, Kate.

What did I do to you? What the fuck? You get clapped on camera, Kate. Yes, of course. Would you get clapped on camera, yes or no? Well, no, you're not going to actually video the clap. I don't know. You're asking old lady Kate, younger Kate.

Perhaps. No. Younger today would have been about it. Wait, why, wait, why are you asking that, though? Because, like, he's talking about going up the girls. I haven't got a nut off in fucking three days. I'm sorry. Go jerk off, dude.

Go out in the shower. Go jerk off. Jerk off. Go out in town. We need a nice lady. Oh, K was doing what suggesting something you could do that would help. I was trying to help you. Wait, you're so straight that you won't jerk off because it's a man's hand.

Is that what you just said? He's got hairy arms. I just want pussy, man. Like, I don't want to jerk you off. It feels disgusting. The man, it's broken because this is so ridiculous. You're killing it right now. So the main dilemma is you can't find a lady who wants to be on camera.

But you can close the door to, you can close the door to clap. They're not going to be in the room while you're clapping. If I could script how tonight goes, it's Tommy smokes bringing a chick back and we get the Nikki Smoke Stefan Diggs picture. Oh, yeah. Staring at the bedroom. I'll be back here. Petting the door knob on his knees.

I hate that he's funny. I swear to God, I'll do everything I can. Oh, smokes. What about, what about Rochelle Ryan? Oh. Yeah. Oh, I'm trying to run that. Oh, okay.

I think she wants to go to Paris. I'm just trying to resort. Rants? I do it with dating or not like the Eiffel Tower. Oh, nice. It's got to be Dante. I'll get Griffin out there. You need Griffin out there?

Yeah, I do. Actually, she wants, that's her dream three. some is me and him. Oh, my God. You'd be, you'd be comfortable with a... No, I'd be petrified. That he would show you up? Because Connor fuck's better than you?

He's probably got a firecracker. I mean, but honestly, getting out-meated by Griffin. No, you can't out-meat me. Well, how do you... Okay. Oh, shit, I didn't know that. You forgot it to wrinkle. All right, Tortia Fest, okay?

Just all eyes on Tortilla Fest. All right, do we have Stevie Fes? Shay, Gabby, do you have it? Do you have a mic out there, Gabby? Yeah, he's getting set up. Okay. Holy shit. Oh, boy. Here we go.

Roan, were you here for this last year? I was not. This is my first time seeing this. It's so uncomfortable. Yeah. Sometimes I like this kind of stuff and sometimes... I love it. No, Roan, you love it.

You'll like this. You fucking love it. I just can't believe that he has a different part of his brain eaten by the amoeba. That, like, doesn't get nervous in front of him. front of a room full of... Did Chan Mincy ever go in the same pond? Is there footage? But Roan, I mean, I miss you all the time, Ron, but when I really miss you is when we get

a really uncomfortable moment on the yak and everyone wants to be out of here except for me. And I'm like, I need... You got to sit in it. It sucks. It's... It sucks. Yeah. You guys...

Ask if anybody... Farts in that ass or whatever the fuck. A fart poop with that ass. If I could fart myself, I would have never had to say that. But I just have a farting problem. in an offset asshole. Kate, are you pre-uncomfortable? Oh, yeah.

It's actually more potent. Yeah, I sense it over here. You're saying that the previous stuff, I was driving through rural Indiana recently for Easter to see family, and I passed Twin Kiss ice cream. And right away, I was like, Ray Romano. You guys have ruined my brain.

Yes. Twin Kiss. It's hot. It's hot. Oh, here we go. Oh, boy. And he will introduce our special guest. All right, thanks everyone.

A couple housekeeping notes. Hopefully everybody had good lunch. The ice cream machine is pumping and working all day. So the cream team will be happy to fill it up. I see some of you have your ice cream. It's a great sugar rush in the afternoon if you start doing a little bit of this, head nodding. Nice to meet you all. I've been in the Chicagoan community for almost 15 years.

I was an agency side. I was at Beam Sontory for a long time. I've been at Barcelona almost seven years, and so we're really happy to have a lot of. happy to have a lot of you who have been curious about this space walk around take pictures aforementioned ice cream coffee flowing all day we're going to start the afternoon sessions but I want to bring somebody up here who I think is going to bring really a burst of energy into this afternoon programming Stephen Che is the international man of mystery here at barstool

when I first started he was on the ad trafficking team he is also our fantasy football expert Today is Stephen's Super Bowl. It's the draft, so he's been putting out his list of mock drafts all week. He is an avid swimmer. He once ran a 4-4-40. He's a producer on the act. But today he's not doing any of those skills. He's going to tickle your funny bone here for a little bit.

So, Stephen, after you, sir. What's up, Chicago? How we doing? I moved here about three years ago when this office opened. What does it learn some things about Chicago? You know Chicago's on flag? You guys want to work with the Chicago flag? Yeah, yeah.

Beautiful white flag, got some light blue stripes, and there's four red stars on the flag. It's a nice flag. A lot of the city pride which I love to see. But I was trying to learn about the flag. I learned one of the stars represents the great Chicago fire. Great Chicago Fire of 1871. Burn down over 17,000 structures.

You killed hundreds of people. No! You don't have to put that on your flag. I don't think that's necessarily what you wanted to know before. No! No! No! No!

No! No! No! No! Do we lose... I live in northwest birds, good segue! See some signs out again.

Late spring. you'll see a sign in somebody's front law and says, congrats Timmy, graduated Mountain Prospect High School. It's great. It's great. You know, if Timmy maybe did a little arson, I don't think you'd see a sign and said, Timmy burned down on Mountain Prospect High School. Oh, it's circled back.

It's all choices. Oh! Science actually had been rooting my life recently. Anybody drive? You guys drivers? You guys drive, drive cars? So I gotta park my car once in a while. There's parking signs everywhere.

I recently saw a parking sign that said, two hour parking, strictly enforced. All right, I respected the shit out of that sign. But now, whenever I see a parking spot that's like, Kurdside delivery only, 30 minute parking only, I don't respect that. That's not strictly enforced. Oh, right. That sign's been ruined with $800 because I have to be over $800

$800 worth of the parking text last couple of months. And I'm going to take this as my sign to exit. Thank you guys. Oh, my God. He's perfect. Oh, my God. Look at the 9-11. Che, you crush that, dude.

You crush that. I don't think the 9-11 joke went that. How could you possibly think? The culture joke was too far. far, but the 9-11 joke is fine. I mean, that's not like racial stuff. It's just,

Jay, you're the best. It's not playful racial, you know, joke. It's a callback to the train. Our best recent biggest massacre. Jay, unbelievable. Jay, this is why we're the best of all time. We love it.

You're the best of all time. You've got no fear. You get in front of those people and you give him a 9-11 joke. Did his, did you guys see a sign off his wave goodbye? Yeah. Was it a little A little bit. Elonie? A little bit.

All right. It's all right. What did I do? I didn't see the sign on. You crushed it, check. You crushed it. How did the laugh sound? Decent.

I did hear some groans for the 9-11. It was tough. Fuck them. Comedy's comedy, dude. Yeah, comedy's back. Yeah. Follow that. Who's up there now?

What are they talking about now? John, dish soap? Probably CPMs. I love it. Che, I love you so much, dude. Che, you have the biggest balls in the world. I'm so envious of you in so many ways. No fear.

Two for two on the sales. I'll say this. I think it went better than last year. Yeah. Did it? Yeah. He wowed him. Did you feel better?

Last year was kind of a disaster. I had like 10 minutes heads up. I thought I had the format of a joke. I just kind of forgot it. It was pretty. This year was a tight. What was going through your head while you're up there? Today?

Yeah. I can't wait for this to be over. Dude, you're, you're unflappable. Oh, boy. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, there you go, Brandon.

Oh, what was that? Don't. No, it's had a huge. Oh, my God. Does anybody... Green Greg! Green Greg! This is your time to shine. Do you have a fart, Green Greg?

I don't have anything. I don't either. Oh my God, I have nothing. Green Greg, if you have a fart, I'll Venmo you $20. Does anyone in the cave have a fart? Does anyone in this office watching the act have a fart? Nobody's in the cave. Come on.

The one day. I don't know if I have one. I don't. I haven't had any fluids, so I got nothing. I'm going to say right now I will not take someone in my place. I'm going to wait this out. As long as I have to wait. Keeby, this is Jack.

Keeb, what's your legitimately? Can I ask a legitimate question? What is your actual biggest fear? A biggest fear? Yeah. Probably having it like a child who resents me. That's a pretty big fear. Fuck.

I didn't think about that. I think my biggest fear is that just I'm going to, like, time is moving too fast. And I'm going to, like in the blink of an eye, I'm going to wake up and be like, what the fuck, dude? That was awesome. But, man, I wish I can. I feel like you do a good job at taking time to enjoy and embrace moments. Yeah, but it just feels like time just keeps moving so much faster now. And it's just really hard to, like, just like, hold on and just be like everything that I got, right?

right now is so awesome and I'm so blessed and it's like just that's just I just know there's no I visual I do visualization of like like little things like even in my house where I'm like my kids are running around and chasing each other and I'm like I visualize like 10 years ago I think you're it doesn't exist you're looking at life from the perspective of something like it you don't need a deadline yeah you can slow down mentally I know I think it's just I should struggle with the idea that like I know like the old like you wish he knew is the good old days when you were in the good old days like I know it's the good old days yeah so it's like fuck man I wish you could just pause and everything everything in life is a trade off and one of the sacrifices

there is that it goes really fast but the alternative would be that every day is a slog you're miserable no I'm blessed in that way you're unfulfilled and every day sucks so bad and it goes so slowly listen i'm i that never that never escapes me how like lucky i am in that respect where it's like even i was talking to someone about like you know it's it's it's 10 years now where i haven't had a sunday night at home you know i mean like i haven't i haven't i don't know what it feels like to be at home on a sunday night but like that's that's not a that's not a like actual like complaint because it's like i get to come in and do this right cost to do business I had that exact thought two nights ago.

My, you know, when, like, as a parent, when bedtime's coming around, like, you kind of want to just get to it. Yeah, it's like, day to day, it feels like a slog. You kind of, like, rush through it. And it was like, my kid's time's eight. It was like 7.30. And they were like, can we play? Like, can you just, like, chase us? And they're at that stage and your kids are like same age where it's like, that's like, that's the fun part.

Yeah. And like, in the moment, we've been playing for like 15 minutes and doing it all. And I'm going to a separate room and count. with the dog and I'm like man like I really just want them to go to sleep but at the same time like I know when I'm on my deathbed I'm gonna think about this yeah I wish I could I would do anything to come back right so just like take your time enjoy it this is what life's about yeah yeah like I pillow fight with my son who by the way he's he's not the rules of combat are not they're they're not fair he gets he he he he just doesn't play by their rules

And I just, but that's here regardless. It's fun. Bite your. No, I hit him hard and then he's like, that's too hard. And I'm like, and then he sneak attacks me. I'm like, well, what the fuck, dude? But is he open to getting a little roughed up? Yeah, he likes to get a little roughed up.

Some kids are adamantly against it. I had to have a hard conversation with him this weekend. I don't really know how you do it. Like, he, you know, he's six. So, like, you know, he'll, like, hit. every now and then when he gets frustrated and can't like you know just normal kid shit and like he hits my wife and i told him i was like we don't hit women and he was like why and i was just like i didn't really have i was like you're going to be stronger than women you can't hit women but it was like a very

uncomfortable i was like i really should have thought this one out before yeah because then he's like can i hit guys i'm like well no you shouldn't be hitting anyone but like yeah why not women yeah Yeah. One of those conversations I thought I was going into correctly, and then I was like, fuck, I really didn't, I didn't think about the three questions after. You wouldn't be like, oh, because because we're biologically stronger. I kind of said that. I was like, I'm strong. Like, I was like, I don't hit you.

I'm stronger than you. And then that also opened up. It was, I just do, I fuck those up sometimes. I'll tell them, like, we don't. There's a, there's a fine line between men and women. Like, we don't need that. They need us. They need us for safety and.

religious salvation. We're funnier than them. But in reality, it's the opposite. Yeah. We desperately need them. The happiest subgroup of people in the world are single women. Oh, I disagree. No, this has been tested.

No, I disagree. Single women. I throw that test out. I might say single men. So married men are significantly happier than single men. Are you? But single women are significantly happier than married women. Are you excited to get married?

Yes. But I feel like I am, but I feel like I already am. Yeah, but there's something about it. I don't know. Like there's, and I tell people this when they're like engaged, like being married to like your true partner and like having a good marriage. It is a superpower in life. Right. Where it's like you feel like every problem can be beaten because there's two of you. You know what I mean? There's no, there's no, I got to deal with this myself.

It's like, no, you have someone there who can help you through everything. everything. So yeah, it's more than just like the legal label. Right. You really feel as one. It's a partnership. Yeah. It's like if I have a problem, she has a problem. She has a problem. I have a problem. And we tackle it together. Right. And it's like knowing someone who's like always got your back is a superpower. Yeah, I'm excited for the commitment of true unity. We're one. We're one team. Right. And you're like, yeah, she's got my back. I got her back. Like friends come and go. Things change in life. But like that's, that's my teammate it's a special feeling

you should be excited I didn't know how to break this info off what happens if you fart but no sound is made doesn't count doesn't we have to hear it people have to hear it did you cry in your wedding day no do you expect you will you said you cried during the proposal so I'm just like a

vastly different person in front of people that's fair I didn't cry my way intimate emotional moment I don't think I'd be able to I don't know maybe we'll see my wife got mad I didn't cry I didn't really cry during my kids' births either I cried during my kids' verse I cry also during like

Like when we were writing the PMT book We had to the end of the book is like Wow, we all wrote a chapter on how it will end Oh I got a little teary eyed on that Oh yeah Thinking about the ending Yeah I just said never

Right And I admitted that's just a But then not everyone I'm sure had that No no people had funny things They different Different hypotheticals yeah I think about the ending yeah it's hard like I think about that with the yaks sometimes like you know I just think about that where I'm like yeah someday it's just not going to be here and like

what is that what does that mean that's a real fear like in five years like what if the yaks not here it's like I don't our our relationship would would I'd still consider everyone friends but it's like not having the daily touch point would be very bizarre. That's huge. Like, I had a guy, one of my best friends, and we used to work together, and then I got married shortly. We came before I came to Barstole, and so I switched jobs, and he would sit next to me, so we talked every day.

And now, like, he was in my wedding, and nothing against him. I still really like him, but it's just, like, we've fallen a little bit out of touch, and it's tough. He lives back in New York, so it's, we don't see each other. It's tough to kind of get back to. One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to, like, keep friendships alive. It's really, really tough. And this is, yeah.

Yeah. You ever take, like, mushrooms and you're like, holy fuck, I'm not a good friend. What? No, no. Yeah, I have mushrooms. Yeah, mushrooms make you think. It's like, damn, I want to really take advantage of friendships more. Yeah.

And these problems, by the way, are not real problem. Like, everything we're talking about right now is not, like, These are not things that consume me It's just we're When I have a moment to reflect I think about some of these things It's not like I'm like every day Like oh my God I'm in a crisis

I'd actually probably The opposite where I'm Exceptionally happy But there's like things that like you'll stop for a second My son asked me the other day A daydream's real I was like I don't fucking know That's a tough one

Oh My daughter asked me if birds have boogers That's a lot It's a good question. Fucking hard, man. The kids ask these questions. I'm just like, what the fuck? How do I answer these things?

I'm a stupid person. I think I've gotten to the point where my son is smarter than me. Yeah, I'm not there yet because my son can barely read. I can read good. Yeah, but we're getting close. Yeah. Where he's dropping facts on me about the solar system and shit. He corrected me about Pluto.

I didn't know Pluto was kind of back. Oh, yeah. do it. Yeah, it's like kind of back. Not all the way back, but like they're like, they have like a new term for Pluto and I was just like, what the fuck? Yeah. He dropped that on me. I was like, okay. Let him daydream too. Yeah, I told him. I said do it. Use your imagination. Anything is possible. Create anything with your mind. I like that. I like that a lot. What if Pluto was, you know, made of boobs. Then I'd have to talk about boobs. Yeah Good problems to have This is a bad problem to have Yeah this is a bad problem to have

I haven't tried in a while Because I really don't want to Because if I fail the next time I might just be like stuck here forever You got one Kyle No back to Existential Dread Yeah

Yeah Let's talk about it Nice Who is that? Cheye way to go What do you got what do you got kyle existential dread

no give it to me I don't have the right answers I try to combat it by thinking that everything is meaningless oh man that's tough right I do I do an exercise

that has helped me a lot in that like if you have a problem whatever whatever it may be just ask yourself is that going to be will that be a problem

that you remember in a year in or a month six months a year and if the answer is no then it's not really a problem because it's not like that's the thing is we get so consumed with our day to day it's like oh you get pissed off about traffic or like this or that it's like is this a real problem no this isn't a real problem real problems are like people being sick and like you know shit like that like that's those are real problems so yeah it helps because i just like immediately check myself where it's like something stresses me out or something pisses me off

I'm just like, hold on a second. In a week from now, am I going to fucking remember this? No. Okay, not a problem. It's good. It's good exercise. Yeah. How long do you think you're going to be doing this?

Doing this? Yeah. It doesn't feel like I'm getting close. Do you have like a distance in the distance, like 10 years, 15 years? Oh, are you talking? I thought you're talking about farting. No, this may be. Oh, my gosh.

God. No, no, no. I'm saying like this. This? Yeah. For as long as it's rewarding. That's good answer. It's extremely rewarding. That's a really good answer. And for as long as I can. Also true. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah, I think the thing I'll struggle with like in the next, I don't know, five, ten years. I'll probably have to power through like there will be a moment where I'm the old guy getting mocked. But then I think you can get through that and go through the other side where it's like, but also who cares? You know?

Like if your audience ages with you especially, it's like, okay, they don't care. And I think that's what's going to happen. Like, I don't think people are going to age out of internet consumption. No, definitely not. And also, I think we become, we don't realize it to the point, like, and I appreciate this so much. Like, we are part of people's lives day to day and routine,

which is the most rewarding thing that you can be when someone comes up and they're like, Yeah, I listen to the yak every day or I listen to the PMT Monday, Wednesday, Friday. It's like I feel like connected to you. It's like that's fucking awesome. Like my favorite thing, my favorite thing is when I'm like walking Stella or taking my kids to school and like someone passes me and they just like they just go like this. Point to their phone or like point to their headphones. Like you're, I'm with you right now. The more they know about me, the more appreciative.

Yeah. because I kind of get hung up on results like I want to perform well yeah and it's way more rewarding if people are just the connection is the thing yeah the numbers mean nothing the connection is the thing yeah it's like the numbers are fine yes they're superficial and you want to be you want to perform but like the connection and like people who are like tell me like oh I've been reading or like for the last 12 years and I've gone through all these life things like holy fuck man yeah and that can be so overwhelming that you try to combat it by being like um I don't know what was I gonna say well I went to I was I was at my kids uh basketball game and it was the YMCA and this kid came up

to me it was like hey man like just want to say like I used to I went to Lincoln Park high school and played on the baseball team and I remember watching you walk Stella in Oz Park. This was like 11 years ago. Grown-ass adult. He's like, I remember when I was like 16. Planet in their memory. You're like, holy shit.

That's fucking awesome. Yeah. It's cool. But then you also have to, then you also have to combat it with like, when you die. Oh. Yeah.

Outside of the people closest to you. The internet will move on within 24, hours. And we've seen that firsthand. First hand. How many people still think of David Bowie? I guess that's bad. That's bad because I try to

combat the overwhelming feeling of all these people care about me by being like, no, they don't. Yeah. They'll stop soon. This is temporary. No, I don't think that's temporary. It might be, but then it's like an issue at all, but why does it? Yeah.

Why does it matter if people come and go? Right. It doesn't. So, like, I'm, yeah, I'll appreciate you if you stop. And I think there's, like, we don't realize that there is such a thing as, like, podcast fatigue and, like, people, you know, I'll see some people sometimes be like, oh, yeah, I haven't listened to PMT in forever. Then I started again. It's like, okay, cool. Like, I get it.

I wouldn't. It's not fuck you. Yeah. Well, you listen to someone for so long, you pick up, like, you know, you pick up all their, the things you don't like about them. then you make it bigger in your head, and then it's like, you know, oh, he says that or, oh, the way he says that. Like, I don't like that.

It's like, all right, take a break. You're the best at that. I don't know. Rolling through. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, obviously there's people who like despise me, but it is what it is. And then maybe they'll come back.

All right. I think I might, I don't want to. Do you have one, Kyle? We kind of have to go on. I'm more worried that no one else is, like, stepping in. I feel like. We have to go.

We have established ourselves as this clique of assholes. There's no one in this office that could love one rip right now. Goldfish. That was you? Yeah, that was me. I'm not leaving you, though, Kyle. Oh, no, you can leave. No, no, no, I'm not leaving you.

We got to find someone. Yeah. I felt good. Eat some goldfish. Yeah, give me some. You got another? You got another? Not a real one.

Where's Deutsch? Doits should be, like, number one in this. Why? go round up people who can fart yeah i'm stuck i farted i farted twice and they haven't made sound how are all these fucking guys not farting what if i do another one does that count no count for me yeah we're still here what if i get what if i get two for both of you oh i can do this i got this if you do that yeah all right here we go i want to get two for blotman and keith we're gonna try right i'm not here

I know you got one down. You got, you got to try. Who still needs one? Oh, Big Cat, God. I think I got it. Just two of us, me and Liam. Come on, Cat. Yeah, we, Kyle and I just chat.

Who are in his part? Me and KB. I farted, but I'm here for solidarity. Oh, I got that. This one? Who's that? All right, we'll see you over tomorrow. Tommy actually pisses me off.

What could have happened? when he does this little... Yeah, it actually makes me mad. I actually get... How are you still, Bob? I don't know. I don't know. Because it is hard of hearts.

He wants people to... Of course. Yeah. Get Tommy Zoom in. That's what he wants. Right. Now you're giving... No, we're not even going to...

We're not even going to talk to him. How would we not mention... I keep my birthday a secret this year, so nobody even knows when it is. I know you usually make a big stink of it, but I don't even want to acknowledge turning 30 because that'll feel too real, so don't expect to see any tweets from me about it today. He smokes 30. Yeah. That is actually, he's right.

I think zooming him in is tough. No, what if we zoom in and we don't talk to him? We don't even mention him? Yeah. Say, like, what are you doing here? Put him in the corner? Yeah, yeah. They just left clues everywhere.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. So many. It's insane. What's that called? Dupers Delight when you're getting off on leaving it right in front of people. Oh, is that a thing? I don't know.

It is. It's like an arsonist watching their house, the housework? It's like leaving a calling card. The wet bandits. Yeah. It's a good time for Patrick. Sticky bandits.

Well, it's more of the wet bandits. Thicky bandits. What were they most recent? I can't believe. But they were no, the, they came to fame was the West, wet bandits, though. But like, don't you want to be known

for your most recent work? No, I think their first thing, the first thing they ever did was wet bandits. And that's how I. The wet bandits. The wet, I think it's more. I understand what's happening here. The wet bandits.

Brandon, you think they stole a lot of gold? They're going to keep me in silent in the bottom of the screen and not acknowledge they might have. They're trying. They'd probably try. Is that what's happening here? Did you guys see the

headline of the guy who used to own the Home Alone house? Yes, he's a pedophile. It was a wild. It's my birthday. What do you do? Can you find it, T.J. It was a roller poster of a

it's also like that that house is so that house is so famous that that's what's listed in your like death. You have the home alone house? Yeah, that you owned it. at one point.

Wow. TJ has Tommy through yet? I'm on. I'm on. I could see myself on the YouTube. We can see myself on the YouTube that moment. He was the guy who owned it like, like when do you mean owned? Like the guy like for decades.

Let me find you the headline. The headline was, are you here? It's former owner of Home Alone House found dead in Chicago suburb. We can go in alphabetical order to wish me happy birthday. We could play. After child sexual abuse material. Oh no.

Oh no. Tommy, come back. Another screenshot from the episode. Tommy, come back. Hey, there he is. Hey, man. You want to just tell you how much we love you? Come here. Come here.

Come on. Let's compliment the boy. Tommy, we wanted to wish you a happy birthday. Please come back. How you doing? It's happy birthday. It's worth it. Yeah, look at this.

Yeah. 30th. All right. Yeah, the big three of. Thank you, this is so perfect. I love it. My siblings think I killed our cap.

Did you? Did you care? I don't think so. I mean... Because the last time he was alive was... He was found in my bedroom dead on the floor. Oh, no, dude. Yeah, but he was really old.

He was like 25 years old. Okay. But he hung out in the bedroom a lot? Because my bed was on the ground, and he would sometimes... come in the bed and lay down. Like 25 in human years? Yeah.

They say you rolled on him? They like, I don't know if they joke, but like, he was found dead next to my bed. And they say, Dana, you probably rolled on it. When was the last time you saw him alive? No, like, what, right for bed?

Like, right as you were dozing off? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He was alive. He was falling asleep next to you? You know, it's like a pet, jumps in your bed. Right, but did you wake up and dead?

Woke up, he was on the side of the bed dead. Yes, you definitely killed the cat. He was so old, dude. No, he was on his, he was bones. You go to sleep, you're laying in bed, your cat comes in, lays in the bed with you, you wake up, cat dead. He was bones. When cats are about to die, don't they, like, try to go be alone, they go under the porch. Yeah, they don't want you to see them. Yeah. Yeah. Is that true? Yeah. That's not true. Yeah, that's true. So yeah, you killed your cat. Your cat was not ready to go. Your fat. Your fragile bony cat

kind of with you? Wait, was it dead in your bed or on the side of your bed? Well, yeah, because he probably kicked it off

on the mattress. He probably kicked his dead cat off. My mattress was on the ground. What? Why? The whole thing. Go ahead.

Yeah, please. We were in the transitions from houses. Okay. How old were you? Sophomore in college? How big were you? Not nearly as big as I am now.

How drunk were you? Big enough Cal Capo. I think I was drunk. All your siblings think this? I mean, I can call my sister. Yeah, I mean, she's don't mind it.

Yeah. Please. Call art. That's awesome though, Kyle. I'll call my brother. My brother would know. Yeah, three is the limit, Ed, by the way. Three is the limit. If we, no, four the sides of our place, three is the absolute limit. So if you get a bigger apartment a couple years. Didn't you move places because you were at the limit? He's lying to you, Ed.

Yeah, we, bigger space. Now we have three. A new limit. It's capped at three for now. Are you lying to me? Yeah. I might be. I don't know. That's the thing. Don't know. We'll see how easy it is. He's lying to you.

Once you get to three, it's over. Have you ever had a cat? I had a cat for a few years growing up. Didn't really like it. No. It's okay. I love cats. Have you had?

Because you're not a dog guy. No. I've never heard a cat. I liked, we had a dog and then we had a cat. The cat didn't really like humans. Ah. So. Do your kids ask for cats?

My kids do. My wife probably would get one. I don't know if I want one. I don't have not post I'm like I like that's thing I think maybe if honestly the one that I'm on me or no no hold on you're on a show right now how are you doing today after all that I'm great but this is actually unrelated you haven't talked to your mom we texted okay okay um yes remember scamp yeah did I did I roll over on scamp and he died no that's what your brother keeps telling you but there's no evidence of it but you whoa whoa hold on hold on

mama beers it's big cat right now you might how how are you um you say no yeah i don't know if we've met just let big cat talk mom hold on you say no evidence yet the last person to see scamp alive was dana right before he dozed off and then scamp was dead next to dana's bed and Dana's not like a quiet sleeper. So that's evidence. Are you trying to convince me that he killed his little kitty? Can you just say, is there a zero percent chance? No.

Okay. A court of law. This is what we're trying to find out. Pete. Oh, that one doesn't count. Oh, hold on. I was three years old. What happened would he be?

I opened the backyard fence and my dad found him eaten by a coyote. Oh, that's enough. Why'd you open the door? This is a funny anecdote. You were wearing a diaper outside then, too. Oh, yeah. So, but I found him. I never wanted you to feel like you hurt or killed a cat.

He was very old. He was like 26 years old. See, I told you. He said. No teeth. Right, but still. No teeth. You loved him and he loved you.

And there's not 0% But I just were going with this Your brother's going with the story that you did it I'm going with the story that he just died in his sleep. Well, and also Mama Beers I appreciate you answering the phone call because then What was Pete? Was it Pete? Pete, yeah.

So we're this just went from A murder trial to a serial killer Try. He does seem to be able to get two cats on Dana's Two bodies. All right. Okay, Dana, I don't mean to get you in more trouble, but let's not talk about the hamsters. Oh, no.

What about the hairs? What happened with the hamsters, Dana? Oh, all right. No, no, no, no, no. Can we just hear a little bit of hamster talk? There's a little hamster talk, yeah. Yeah, what happened? Well, gosh, I don't want Peter to get upset with us because we do, you know, we love animals.

We love our animals, yeah. But Dana and his brother were kind of like, they were close together, but they were sort of tossing a hamster between each other gently. And our family dog, like, who was used to getting beanie babies when they would do that, got the hamster. He played fetched with a hamster. He intercepted your game of toss the hamster. Like a beanie baby.

And it ran off with the hamster? All right, mom. Tina. Torit. Thank you so much, Mrs. Beers. Oh, trouble. No, no, you did a great job. Dana, the man backfired, bud. I love you.

We had him in a diaper. He's the bad. Torturing him every day. Every single day. Okay, so, Dana. Bye, honey. I love you. Bye.

Dana, you know what? A sweet lady. You know what I wouldn't do? Great mom. I wouldn't call my mom about the alleged cat killing if I have other animals that I also The Pete one is, that's like, okay. I was a three-year-old kid that accidentally opened the thing. How old were you on the hamster?

Like seven, I don't know. Do you remember what you did as soon as the dog? Do you remember the dog at all? I was just too young. Two-yard. I just opened the gate and then he ran out. Wait, wait, Pete was a dog? I'm talking about the hamster.

Oh, Pete was a dog. He was talking about the dog caught the hamster. Oh, that? We used to just toss him around a little bit. Was it like traumatic when you saw the dog run away with it? Oh, yeah. I'm wondering. Was the dog like following hamster and white?

I just spit up on myself. Oh, yeah. Wait, how did the dog kill? Cried for days. He just fucking bit his, bit him up. What the fuck? But Dana, did he run away with it? Yes.

What was the carcass looking like? I didn't look at the carcass. They just, you know, bit them up a little bit. Died instantly. You know how hamsters are? You just take one tooth to the rib. You're done. Dana.

Why were you tossing them then? It was like a game. I don't know. Dana, no- He loved it, dude. He enjoyed it. That hamster did not like that. I don't think the hamster liked that.

Yes, he did. Dana, I don't want to tell you, like, what stories, like, you should leave with and stuff, but the monkey stealing your dad's hat is not your number one, like, animal story. No, Dana. You got some. I love animals. Now, I'm worried about, like, Ralphie. I feel like I have a bad, uh, I have a bad history.

I think you got it all out of your system. Just don't toss them around any coyotes? Ralphie should be confiscated. What the fuck, Hammy? I'm a scarred. Can we, I think cats like to die alone. If it would not go in there to die. That doesn't make any sense.

Dude, hammy. That would have fucking a seven-year-old? Yeah, I try to block it. A lot of like my life, like, from up until like 17 years old, I like don't really. And I don't think, I don't think you did anything wrong. Oh, yeah. Boys being boys, tossing the hamster around. Chucking your hamster.

We were chucking. If you like this. If you close your eyes. Do you remember it vividly? Yes. How close were you and your brother? Me and you or Kyle? You and Kyle.

Me and Eddie. Okay. Now, was it your throw or his throw? I don't remember who's throwing. Oh, good question. Your feet in the... Do you remember? That's why he's framing you for the cat job.

He threw the hamster. Yeah, true. Oh. Yeah, call your brother. I did answer. He did an answer. All right, tell him to call. She has a real job.

All right, tell him to call if he sees it. I want to get to the bottom of hammy. And then cats instinctively seek out secluded, quiet and dark. places to die he mistook you for a house oh yeah he thought you were a porch this was supposed to be danis this was supposed to be danis coronation for everything he did this is enjoy the money asshole parade of championship animal killer holy shit hammy we have feel brand they feel right they feel incredible they feel incredible from to me they feel incredible yeah can i honk him wait can i actually Do you sit up?

Uh-huh. Wait, no, no, no. Now leave me. Like mother, like son. Wait, Brandon, Big Cat, don't. Have you ever... Do the reverse. Do behind.

Do the behind Titus. Get two hands behind. You already motorboated the mother. Yeah. They're good. Yeah, the nipples are very realistic. And, like, have you guys seen the bear titty yet? Uh, yeah.

The nipple here. Q is... Oh, it's perfect. Oh, my God. It's a pre-draft. Is this your first draft, then? Oh, man. I was here for...

Is that greedy? Oh, fuck. Oh, one more to do. Fuck, I. Don't really watch now. No, they need K. Oh, man. What do you want for K ad?

God, they're all terrible. I'll wait. So it's kimchi, Kampau, and... No kimchi. No? What's the way in? Blue cheese. Oh, no.

Kimchili. And Kermah. We're so... Probably ketchup, dude. What about Kupi? What's it called? Coupie Coupie

Grab the fucking Coupe That's what Doug has in his band The Indian Corma I don't think so Corma ketchup Blue cheese or Kim Chil Whatever that is

Fine grab ketchup I fucking hate ketchup Cetchup Oh No fucking hate it You just went The Miralax ketchup

That was dog shit teamwork Ed really wanted I need the sour In the icebreaker To break through ketchup Milk and Beards Oh no

Greedy! What's that mean? Greedy. That means I got to get something else. You want dirt or baby food? Ham, ham puree. I think you want, you got to go with the dirt. You got to go dirt.

No, you don't. I don't hate, I don't hate that. We don't hate dirt. You hate ketchup, but you don't hate it. I would do dirt over ketchup. What? I would swear. What are you talking about?

I swear. What's those reds? Danny, Eddie wants dirt. Come on. Yeah, you just took ketchup. Now you can do something. Eddie hates olives. Yeah, shredded up, owls would be fine, I think, right?

Yeah. Yep. Yep. Over dirt. Ed, are you going to let him just, like, manipulate you like this? You want, it's a team. You want the fucking dirt. Maybe food is nothing.

I mean, dirt could be high upside. You never know. How? You're sucking this. It's right. Wait, it's beef and ham? It's just pureed ham and pureed beef. It's like a very hot tub.

What the fuck does that mean? Have you eaten dirt before? Bitcoin? Yeah. Who hasn't any? dirt. Well, it's going to turn to mud. Oh, shit. You didn't think about that. Baby food. Milky dirt. Probably baby food.

Beef for ham. You don't like the pepper? For the... Olives? You don't like the pepper? I don't love olives. I say, you don't like the pepper. He said, don't like the pepper. Daddy. Daddy, don't like a pepper. Daddy, don't like a pepper. Daddy, I'll let you choose. I'll let you choose. Don't choose. Daddy.

Daddy. You're going to look at me and say you don't like to Pepper. Don't touch the dirt. Eddie, grab that dirt. Don't. Touch the dirt, Ed, it's your call. Ed. No, no.

He's dominated. Not just regular dirt. Yeah. What are you doing? Why do you want to eat dirt? Oh, he chose dirt. Ed. Because of the upside.

The upside. Oh, the R-O-Y. We don't know. It's a project. You don't know. We have a pretty good idea. We don't know dirt. What's the best dirt can be, Ed?

Who knows? The ceiling of dirt is dirt. It's like dirt. Mud. Are you hoping it's actually chocolate flakes or something? I mean, it appears it. Kind of looks like it. High upside pick.

There's a big cat's trunk for a year. It's not just regular dirt too, Oakland Coliseum. You're going to win for this dirt. It has chemicals in it. Oh, my God. No, I shouldn't have taken it. It's dirt.

What does it smell like? It smells like chalk from the diamond. I've been deceived. Oh, man. No, the upside is gone. Zero upside. So it mixed well with laxatives and icebreakers. And milk.

That's really fought for dirt. The upside. It's not horrible. It's very chemically. It was getting crazy. No, stop. Oh, no. No.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. More dirt. Get more dirt. Oh, there's more dirt. You might as well. You might as well. More dirt.

Eddie, what's more dirt? Nothing. What tastes exactly this? Baby food. You're literally bringing Stan to a beach. Who cares? Yeah, who cares. Who distributes?

Irrelevant. It's a healthy portion on everything. Don't get dirt again. Get the baby food. You don't want to add another flavor. You're not going to add another flavor. You need more dirt. Then dirt is going to be overpowering our tip milk.

That's not the worst. It's not the world. I know. Dirt? I don't know. I guess I've never tasted it before. It can't say, but. Eddie, that's high upside.

This one, this one you busted off. Do the opposite of what they say, Ed. Double dirt. Danny, why did you pick this fool? Marrow wax followed by dirt. I like the upside. You got a triple dirt. You got a triple dirt.

You're not tripled dirt. You have to triple dirt. You can't be introducing new flavors, Eddie. You got to go dirt. If you're double dirt, you might as well triple dirt. Our drink is going to be mostly dirt. What's the difference between two and three dirt? We're going to be drinking mud.

He's right. There's no difference. Diminishing dirt. Oh, this one tastes like a little bit stronger of dirt. Just have more dirt. Dude, dude, imagine dirt mixed with ham. That's fucking gross. We'd rather have dirt and ham or dirt.

That is. Honest to God. Get more dirt. Eddie. He's fucking. We were lying. Triple dirt. How does he keep falling for the dirt?

He keeps falling for the dirt. No more dirt. I'm part committed. if you're already dirt Listen Eddie is a gambler here Like if dirt ends up being good He had the greatest draft of all the time

Yes The upside is insane Yes If dirt ends up being good You don't know We don't know It's dirt We've more dirt

You got a lot more with that Yeah great Crazy Geez Danny what the fuck is happening I think you just Want to eat dirt No

I'm starting to think I'm not gonna lie I want to eat dirt He's got so much dirt. I'm like, I want that. We don't want dirt. It would be bad enough if it was just dirt and milk, Ed? We don't know that, though.

We have a good idea. There's a reason we don't serve dirt. Eddie, why do you think dirt's some grand mystery? Danny, you're not taking into account. You also are going to get diarrhea. Yeah. Right. Yeah, and you're going to blame the dirt.

You can't blame the dirt. You are going to blame the dirt. That's the thing. We can't blame the dirt. Your teeth. Yeah. Mud in your throat. Oh.

I mean, come on. Is that greed? That's greedy? There's dirt if you need dirt. What is? I know. How is everybody having it? What is it?

If Eddie picked it three times. He's got to know something. Right. I understand the bad appeal about the baby food is it's mushy mess, but you're going to be putting in a blender anyway. But this is like a classic draft scenario where there was a run on. dirt and you're like fuck I don't have any dirt I'm not a mad man yeah if you're curious about how dirt tastes do it in your own time

I'm not curious I was up against the wall I want ham whoa what you want dirt I'd rather have dirt than ham brother of dirt than ham who are you guys this is fucking crazy I'd rather have the beef

no no no oh I really didn't want the ham what you grab oh fuck I took the beef he took the Beef. Oh, the hand made me like what is going on? Beef over dirt's a pretty much.

Am I? I'm in rug rats. What's going on? How are you guys high on dirt? I don't know. I'm floored right now by all of you. We don't know. K.B.

You should watch your tongue. I would rather have that he said. What do you mean? Watch like this. We're not getting dirt. If we have an opportunity to get some dirt,

we're getting some dirt. What's happened to all of you? Eddie said high upside. I'm not. Eddie's treating it like it's frog legs. And Eddie's going to piss me off. He's going to take a sip. He's like, it's not bad.

You just don't know what it is. I'm with Eddie. The unknown. Drafted Anthony Richards in three times. You could be flannel. You never know. Could be ham. Could taste like ham.

Oh, yeah. We'll trade Italian hot peppers for ice. Denied. You don't want Zipa? Zepepa. Say your line, Ed. Z-peper. Why don't you want Z-peppa?

You don't remember saying that? Tastes like paint. What? Wait, what? From Dennis the Menace? Taste like paint. When the paint goes on the grill? Yeah.

Say your line, Eddie. It tastes like paint. Taste like paint. Is that your line? No. Why did you say it? Are you on something like experimental? When Nick said,

your line, why did you think of that line? Why was that the line? You're like, oh, he must want me to say, he tastes like pain. I don't know. Something strange has happened. Some took over me. Staring on the barrel of triple dirt.

Big cat. I'm going to be having I got one there. Thank you. Tuna, milk, Mirlax, Italian dressing, and Ken's Chunky. And Ken's Chunky.

And what titty are you having it from? I'm having it from Brandon's left titty, my favorite. And also maybe some dirt. Bad backwards. Oh, that's the tuna. Oh, that's so bad. Oh, that was so bad. Oh, Daddy, not you, Daddy.

Oh, my God. It's so bad. Oh, no. I'm Nick. sucking out of Brennan's right titty milk depepper curry no baby food Che what else do I have olives hot sauce and bathe ham baby mushroom mushroom cream of mushroom and mango and mango oh I eat over a peaking again It shoots right down your throat

It's so bad It shoots? I thought it was like seeping out You don't have a second To get ready for it It's a high PSI It squirts out It squirts out

When he hits the thing When it hits a nozzle It just squirts right in your throat I thought it oozed out In blue cheese in the back of my throat Oh I'm automatically choking On somebody that tastes disgusting

Put your arms under him? We had bean soup A ton of dirt Tana syrup. Proceed. Soy sauce. We had a lot of soy sauce. Mostly dirt.

A lot of dirt. Brandon, look at your baby boy when he's doing it. Ed, you tempted? Oh, my God. Are you just gonna... The nipple, Ed? Yeah, buddy. Oh!

Go down the wrong pipe? suck it like that. Chugged it out of your Tiddy. Damn, Ed, chill. I knew you had it like that. Fucking weirdo. I was wanting to get over with.

Yeah. Does a DM something saying? Yeah. You get any else other ones of those or not? Yeah, I did. Why? Did Danny tell you to say that? No, I was just curious.

What? I don't want to do this. Has this been brought up? Subject. This has been brought up, right? I think it has, yeah. What's going on? I mean, it's nothing crazy.

No. I was, I enjoyed how much it amused Danny at one point. It's so amusing. Just saying. I got a DM from a guy that says, White Sox Dave once rented me his car. No, no.

But that's all I got, and I asked Danny about it. He was like, that's a very sensitive subject. But you forced my hand. Rented someone, his car? Boys, I don't know. Dave just used to rent his car out to people for a few extra bucks. Nothing against it, but once he started being like, what's the big deal that's when it's like all right now it's kind of like friends no random people

it was on like an app oh this is a service now but he was doing it under the table maybe it was on the service this is probably like what 20 22 2021 oh this was recent what's a recent yeah this was like this was 15 years oh this was recently and I don't really know doing it we should just rent it under an alias we should just whip it around it into the Like, just the fact that he gives it to them with like baseball mitts in the back. Yeah, yeah. It was just funny. Doesn't he travel with a lot of myths?

Yeah, and his car is always a wreck. I'm one to be talking, but, but no, that's kind of all the, guys experience. It's kind of the only information I know because I've always been too afraid to pry. Did he tell you himself, like, I can't come over this week. Someone's renting my car right now? No, we found out in a weird way, similar to this, right? He was honest about it.

He'd be like, hey, guys, someone's got to drive to this video. Like, I got my car. Someone's rented on my car. They were like, wait, what? Back up there first. You were on a real app? I can't even say it without laughing. Eddie, you're real tickled by this.

I would lose to love how much Danny would love. We just got into a huge debate, like, off camera. Like, Dave, there's, like, so many other more normal ways to make money. It's hard times that bad, dude. And I was like, this wasn't that long ago. No. Yeah, like, your car is kind of, like, intimate. Like, I would be giving my car to strangers.

and then just him having to ask for rides. Because his car is gone. He's needed his car, but he's still just giving it to a random guy. I wonder what the rate was. You're going to be mad that this was brought up? No, I don't think. No, he's going to be mad that we think it's weird. Yeah, yeah.

Is it Turrow? Does he rent out on Turrow? That sounds right, T.J. I've used that app as a customer before. It's just like it's like renting a car except instead of going to a car rental counter, you just like go to a neighborhood and there's just like a lockbox attached to a car. But that's kind of like inconvenient. needs you so like I don't understand if Dave

was like going out of town or right but he's like he needed it yeah he's like oh shit I can't drive today I rented my car is he here what a phone no he's he's driving down to Atlanta right now

oh yeah for are you guys going to Sydneywell's yeah yeah good for her I don't know why is he driving I think he's like he's like bringing the dogs and he's like doing a thing To the wedding?

Hope you don't mind. I brought my dogs. What? I mean bring. Well, now we got to zoom him in there. I want to see a car full of dogs. He's going to Atlanta. He's doing the whole thing?

Yeah, he's got two dogs and he's going now. Do a wedding. Hey, Sidney, is it cool if I bring my dogs to this wedding? Nah, she won't care. I haven't thought about that. All right, text to White Sox State. You've got to get them on. This is.

This is the Zoom show. You got it to you? Yep. He's not going to answer. You don't think? Well, he's probably with his girlfriend, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I wanted the dogs as hers.

We normally rent the dogs out before me. Knowing him, it's like, obviously the hotel he's going to does not allow dogs. What? Since when? Oh, I think he's doing an Airbnb. I think he did. nice in that. But yeah, he's

taking the dogs. Making a trip out of it. Good for Dave. Good for Dave. Yeah. Who else was going to the wedding? I think it's me, him and chief. Really? I think, yeah. Is this wedding, I feel like it's going to be a banger.

Got it. I told you, I saw her at soccer, and she said that her future husband is 18 groomsmen. Yeah. Oh, my God. So I just like, I need to brush up with my bulldog football.

Do you know how many people are invited? I think a lot. Yeah. It's at his like, like place or whatever, I think. I think it's like 500 people and two dogs. Yeah. Oh, I can't wait to see.

And Dave's in his girlfriend's car because his is his is rented out on Turin. I just don't touch the bag of mitts. Dude, people were taking that thing on road trips. He's handing it back to him. But he needed it.

Smoking huff-ass weed. Yeah. Smoking up as we You know what I mean I don't I actually want to use this now I think that's It seems like a good service

I don't want Dave I would rent somebody's car Probably a lot cheaper right But I think almost It's probably people that like have a car Just for this Yeah a second car Yeah like I think it makes sense If you have like

Obviously it depends But how how expensive You're a premium So I think people do buy cars Just to use it on there I don't, I mean I'm not gonna knock it yet I'm not not I liked it also

Because you could pick the exact car Like sometimes when you rent through Like a rental service It'll be like general SUV or whatever This is like you know exactly What car you're getting That's cool Photos of it before you get into it

You know exactly what you're getting But you don't get to like deal with a You know customer support person If there's an issue I guess I thought it'll be funny if he's doing it under the table Just an ad Yeah that's what I Oh you know what it was

I think we were in the back of the old office and I saw he like gave a random person's keys and they got in his car because we only had those certain amount of parking spots back there you saw the hit yeah and I was like what was that renting my car okay I have a couple followers like don't make this a thing I'm laughing how much you two fucking love and a lot of it was just like his his side mirror was dangling at one point. I'm like, you're just handing it to them like, yeah, right?

But yeah, didn't you drive in and have to hold the mirror up? Yeah, I did. At our old office, once I'm like you, my construction worker smoked his side mirror, and we were just hanging for months. I've only seen any laugh like this one of Mr. Portnoy. I love it.

It's White Sox Jones, dude. He just, I love him, but I hate him. He's the best. Do we, do we get him Zoom? No, I think T.J. Texas. No, no.

No. And he like, he like got a scratch out of his car before assessing the dangling side of your mirror. It was all. I went in his car and was like maybe he said he had it for like years. And the first time I was in it when we first started at first started on the podcast, he got hit by a semi. Like a like it by a semi? Not bad, but like it was like doing a turn. How do you get not bad at it by a semi?

No, no, no. No. It was like turning and like the radius was all, you know? So it's just kind of like, and he's like, what the thing? It gets out, like, pulse aviators off. Like he's like assessing it. Like, you know, whatever. I was like, the first problem I've had.

And since then it's been stuck. You like, I went in there and there was a chunk. There was a chunk out of the seat. Remember that? Yeah. It was like. A chunk out of the seat? Dude.

He's like, you're my fucking brother. He put a smoker in there And I've never seen you like this Brother put a smoker in there He took the chunk out Holy shit It was so funny He had a giant chunk out of a seat

From his brother's smoker Yes It was so funny What else? What else? It goes on and on Like one day he was It was a dumpster

and he couldn't see, so he pulled out and he got smoked. He's like, W.S. I'm not exactly. Every time you drive with him, I'm sorry, Dave, but he's blowing at least one stop sign. He's going at least 40 over a speed bump. Or a speed bump? It happened recently. He definitely doesn't slow down for speed bump.

No. Oh, it's, oh, it's so funny. And this is the car he's renting out, the one with the chunk out and the broken mirror. Yes, like this winter got all rats chewed up. ball the electric he's renting out his rat chutes are his car is just curse how much is he paying for this to be rented

I don't know and he keeps his mitts yeah baseball mits in case like he ever has a game of catch in the back seat catcher's equipment everything there'll be like one cleat in there where's the other

there's like an old thermos how long has I been back there it's so good dude Brother's smoker. How big of a chunk out of the seat? It's like a sizable chunk. He's like, fucking brother. It was a gift for my dad for Father's Day for William Williams and he fucking threw it in the back and a chunk came out of my seat on.

Dave, you told me this, you were like, this thing was pristine when I met you. Like when we started, like, whatever, he's like, I know. Wait, were you with him when you got hit by the semi? Yeah. I still don't understand how you can hit by a semi and not like, it was like, it was more of a box truck sorry it was like but like it was like the turn radius and they got a stop sign yeah yeah yeah and the guy like just kind of like uh clipped them like clipped his like front corner and took the beer he didn't take anything but he just kind of like there were some paint damage let's call it or like a

scratch and Dave got out of the car yeah ripped off the aviators what the fuck man he was like yeah oh man I think that rivaled the mr. portanoid clip oh my god I don't know why the smoke it was because it was so constant. And like he was so proud of how pristine it was. When was this a new car? Probably like 2017, 2018. Okay. It's just gone just to shit.

Yes, yes. Is this still the car he has? Yeah. Yeah. He hasn't called, he hasn't texted you back? No, he won't. We got to rent this thing out. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah, we should rent it. Yeah, just under an alias. You know it's saying like mint condition. Barely used. I gotta get this out Came with a chunk I hope he picks up dogs going to

Dave What's up Where are the dogs Um We just got back From the T-Mobile store Because my girlfriend dropped my phone

In the lake No way That was not the claim No Wait a minute Wait a minute That was your answer For where's the dogs

Well, prior to that. Back to back headliners. Oh my God. Prior to that, the dogs were in the lake by Sydney's place swimming. Okay. And was that avoidable by your girl? I would say so. I hopped in the lake.

I'm like, hold this so it doesn't get wet. And then I turn around and I hear the kerplunk. and I'm like You hopped in the lake You hopped in the lake before your phone went in? She had it He told her to hold it While he went in the lake

Yeah Oh you were just going to swim Yeah I was just hopped in playing Fetch with the dogs and that was that Okay Yeah But um That's it

Down here for Sydney's wedding on Saturday How was uh How's the hole in your In the back of your car Because your brother's smoker Oh, that's been there for like 10 years now. I mean, there's holes all over that car. Yeah.

Holes all over the car. You still rent it out? No, I don't. I actually use Turro to come here. This is a Danny Conrad thing. Wait, why didn't you just drive your own car to the wedding? Because now it's beat to shit and we had two dogs in a bunch of luggage to get down here. No.

We didn't need to have a funeral for that. that car of the day, it finally craps out. Yeah, it's, it's hanging on by a thread. It still drives well, but cosmetically, it looks like a hoopty. I don't understand, but like, I don't understand why Danny thinks this is so weird. People use Airbnb in Verbo. People can do that with their car. I was never touching that car when we were in the insurance office, and I lived a block away.

So that paid for, like, half the car. Yeah, how much was it to rent out your car? I don't know, like, I forget, I'd make like 300 bucks a weekend off of it. People would take it to like Kentucky and Tennessee and Georgia and stuff, though. Like you, you take a bar. Did you have to say that you're bringing the dogs in this car, this rented car? Yeah. Oh.

Mm-hmm. Hey, who stuck up for you, though, once that construction worker knocked your mirror off? All right. Dave. That was you, Danny. That was you. All right. He was thinking about it.

And what about the crock pot? I had to think about what actually happened. The crock pot? Yeah. I might have to get out of here. Danny was. I don't know. We're talking about the crock pot.

Eddie, Eddie brought up, Eddie brought up 80 for Brady. The movie. And how you skirt it off after. Because you had meat in the crock pot. You would drive it back. I had food cooking in the crock pot. They wanted to take me north to Belmont.

I lived south by where our offices now. And I said, guys can hit you Uber. I don't want to deal with Hallstead traffic at rush hour on the middle of the week. You guys can deal with that on your own. I think that's fair. It'd be easier for me. I am actually a typically, typically, typically a very good ride offer.

Just not in that moment. Well, yeah. You're right talking to. Were you lying about after the after dark stream? Exactly. Yeah. But that was an excuse, the meat in the crock pot, right? Yeah.

I, well, that. It wasn't an excuse. it was true. I actually did have food in the crock pot. Not that you can really overcook food in a crock pot. It's kind of the purpose of a crock pot. It was more I didn't want to drive them north on Halstead in rush hour, but I did use the crock pot as the excuse at the time. Okay. Okay. Anything else? Nope. It's good. I mean, we did, we're, yeah. Are you bringing the dogs to the wedding? No, they will be staying here in our Airbnb. Can you put your car back on Turrow for just, like a week. Yeah. I mean, I do not touch it anymore, hardly ever. So maybe I will. It does have a gigantic, it looks like someone took a baseball back to the back right fender. Did someone? That will. What happened? No, a mail truck hit me that time. I was just getting home from somewhere overseas. I forget where. And I'm like, dude, I don't even want to. Wait, you forget where you're getting back from overseas?

I think I was getting back from Italy last year, about a year ago. And a mail-term. It was last May. And I was, I left my phone in a taxi. I tracked the taxi down. I was waiting outside the exact taxi my phone was in. And while that happened, a mail truck hit my car. And I was so over, like, all the travel that I just, I'm like, dude, I don't care.

Like, don't worry about it. So now I have a home back my car too. Oh, my God. Thing took beating. And Ed was with you when a box truck hit you? That, yeah. That was not my fault, Ed. No, that was not his fault, truly.

And your girlfriend dropped your phone. That was not my fault. That just happened. Yeah, it's been an unfortunate run the last 37 and a half years. He went on a... So you went on a... in middle of the day there he is mincy hello

how we doing good what's up right there probably go around no no don't sit in kiles it's right there yeah go around I have to climb

rotate the chair and then spin around I guess he's got this can't interfere with nature no this is tough here sneak through right here

oh thitis here sitting in any seat real quick. Right here. Mincy, did you, first of all, how much Xanax did you have in your luggage? I had three. Okay.

You rehearsed that response. No, I mean, it was truthful. I just didn't, you know. Did you go on a date yesterday during the day? I mean, it was like 3.30? That would be during the day? So yes. What time was actually? What time was.

lunch. Like, I went and ate at three, I think we were there from 315 to like 345. And then you brought her back here? No, she came by before. Oh, before. Was that part of the date? She likes bar still. So I was like, hey, I'll give you to her for 15 minutes and then we'll go eat and then I'll come back to work. Hmm. Okay. I don't really know all my follow-ups are. I mean, I mean, I'm not. No way.

You're using my studio to fuck? I mean, I, I, it had, what the fuck? That's crazy. It hadn't progressed to that level yet. So, you know, I don't know. But you just, you were like, hey, yeah, just come sit in the PMT studio. No, I was like, hey, I was like, hey, I'll give you, uh, an off.

I'll just give you, like, a walk around the office. During, during, during the work day. Well, I waited until after the act. You should tell her that she. sex with you, you'll get her a job here. Again, you got to use all the tools at disposal. You know, we're out, we're out here at 42 firing boys. You know, what are you going to do?

Yeah, I don't think anyone else is doing that, but, you know, you are one of one guy in terms of, uh, yeah, I, I, I'm not mad. I'm not, I don't really, I don't really know what to say. I don't, because, like, if I was, if I got mad, then I'm, then I'm a cock block. Mm-hmm. You don't want to be that dude. Hell no. So are you mad if he doesn't get late? Yeah.

Because that would meet. That would look bad on us. That's because she wants to pickle your balls. She sat in the PMT studio and like nothing happens. You got to close that deal, dude. She's beautiful woman. You know, we're trying. Yeah.

We're trying for children. Does she like you for you? I don't know. How did I meet? How'd you mean? I'm, I met her at a restaurant in Greek town. I go to all the time through a mutual friend, a buddy who lives in the...

Tilted Kilt. So you just went there and she was there? She was there with my buddy and I met her. Got it. And then this was the second date? Yeah, we did like a church brunch Sunday deal. Hell yes. So it's been daytime. A woman of faith.

Yeah, what was the thought? What was the thought behind the date being at 3.15 p.m.? Yeah, you done double dates in the middle of the days. Yeah, so the first one was a Sunday, though. She goes like that's again, the middle of a day. She's dating her boyfriend. Yeah, I don't, I feel like that's not a common time to take someone out on a date. But like, you know, so are you just on?

Yeah, are you progressing towards the night? Like, are you, your first date was at 10 a.m. Second date was at 3 o'clock. Now we're going to sundown. We'll see. We'll see. Have you been in contact? Yeah.

What's you do for a living? She's in like social media and marketing. She's like works for pickleball. She, yeah. She does stuff with like, pickleball. What is that mean? It's growing sport.

You know? Mincy at the lunch the other day. Are you picking up the tab? You're going Dutch. Oh, we picked the tab up. We? We? Or me?

Is that bar stool? No, no. There's no. There's no. There's no. Wait a second. I'm on my credit card. That's why the day.

That's why it was during work hours. No, I definitely did not expense. And it went on my debit card. I don't think I think my only reaction is like, Good luck. Thank you. I think you got this one. Yeah, like I can't have a...

You better close. Just here, I'll be her. You be you. All right. Let's try and seal the deal. Oh, Mincy, what a great date we just had today. It's 5.30. I'm really moved by this.

Yeah, I think we've got to go to the night one for... To figure that out. I'd love that. I don't think he's role-playing with you. Oh. If you offered me a job, I would have sex with you for sure. I'm pretty confident if anybody in this company is a spot to offer people a job, it ain't me. Has she shown any interest in working here?

Every girl's dream. I mean, not, I don't know. I mean, she likes Barstall. I don't think it's anything like beyond that. But, you know, I'm, me, what are you going to do? You know, we're out, like I said, we're out here at 42. You know, we're trying to do the damn thing. We're out of your fight.

We're out of your fighting, you know. Me, what are you going to do? We're trying for a little post-type breakout here. What did I miss? Were there any twists? No. She sat in Big Cat's seat. She said BFTC.

She just the eyeball of OG. She came to the PMT studio and sat. KB, did you miss this whole thing? I'm going to go smell that chair real quick. Time for our next segment. Wait, what time was that? We were here. It was about she came at like 2.30.

We were like sitting right outside the PMT. 3.30. It was after I made, well, in my twisted, convoluted head. I was like, if you're going to come by, you can't come by to after the act. You know, why? Because y'all are feeling, you know, I figured after the act, it's like a little more laid back for visitors. Workday's over after the act. This is crazy. I don't know. I don't know. It's at the office on a Thursday. Well, let's say the, it's at a date at the office on a Thursday. I think it's a good angle, man. Our game respects game.

I see what you're up to, young blood. What are you going to do? You know, like a sad. Don't Offer her work. I can't do that. I cannot offer any person on earth gameful employment at Marshall. Yeah. That only play right now. Yeah, but that's not. I don't.

What did you talk about on the date? Was there not any part of you that was like it's Thursday in the middle of the day? Not exactly the time to have a date? Well, I mean. Real fuckers don't look at the clock. Well, I mean, the. even just like well to be fair his watch was inside her brick watch go get him now was that all like just even remotely being like you know what's a weird time to do a date

2 30 well okay so she you want it when people were here no no the thought was it was originally scheduled for thursday night but she was leaving town Friday morning and so she was like hey can we do late afternoon instead and I was like Yeah. Well, yeah. That was, that was what happened because it was scheduled for third. It was originally planned for Thursday night. And then she said, I like, I kind of, I'm kind of shocked and like in a.

I was, I don't want to say respect. I don't. I don't. I don't. But I do. You know, like I'm, I'm inching closer and closer to the line of like. Respect. But no.

Well, if he brought her here. I can't say that. I can't say that. If you brought her here. Help me, Titus. Help me. You see the angst from my face. Yeah, yeah, I see what you're saying.

It's the audacity. There's something about the audacity that you're just like, I have no more cards to play. Yeah, it's crazy. He's innovating. What were your stops on the tour? Like, where'd you go around the office? We did both floors, went through studios. You know, I told her no pictures of out there.

I'm still for next week because I've already spoiled enough stuff. on that in my career. Did you show her where you sit? Yeah. What did you say when you said this is where I sit? You said this is, I'm up here with all the content people. Did you say if you want to take a seat and you point at your face? That's a good move.

That's all Sam met is, gal. I didn't think about that. Well, if he brought her here at night, no one can see how hot she was. So I think that's the one. Yeah, if the date was at night, would you have brought her by? No. I thought the, oh, so yeah. So then there, that's it right there.

I get it. I just thought the. Yeah. That, that just, thank you, Titus. Yeah. We needed that. That was a very important, I rest my case. So.

Fun way to celebrate one year of cones. Would it be a standard cone, you think, or maybe a little smaller than you? I think a little smaller. Okay, good. I think it'd be like, like, three, maybe like two inches above the cone. While we're on topic, I've been getting DMs. Dana, what is this about Eddie throwing ice cream? Yeah, what is that?

I was very bizarre. I was shocked. Can we play the clip because you can't really hear it. It's a really bad audio. it's probably not even worth. So explain it. And then, because me and Marty were doing a stream for DK. Casino and somebody commented in the chat saying,

Eddie used to throw cones at me in college or something along those lines. And I thought he was fucking around. So we called Eddie and we were like, you used to do this? He's like, yeah. Yeah, I was shocked. When you called him, I thought he was going to be like, no, those people are fucking with you. He didn't even, like, flinch. He's like, yeah, I threw cones.

I know. I still think he might be messing with it. What's your fucking problem? problem. Because it's a waste of ice cream? Yeah. Okay. I don't give a fuck about the person.

Okay, I won't combat that. I got you there. I knew I figured. No, I was offended. You could throw a cone at my own mother and I would be like, don't waste the ice cream, dude. Yeah, don't worry about it. How did you just have cones so readily available as ammo?

Because when you'd walk out of the dining hall. Wait. they filled with ice cream or just cones? No, they're filled with ice cream. That'd be crazy if it was just a dry cone. You can't even throw it. But I would be okay with you throwing just cones. I'd be like, okay, that's funny.

I still would be upset. Just cones? Yeah. You can't even, that's, there's no weight to that. He said if someone looked like they were having a bad day. Yeah, we had ethics. There was a threshold. Yeah.

Like we wouldn't, we would never throw it at someone who like looked like they were. Back up, back up. How many times did you do this? A lot. It's just like, you never, like, had a gag. You never, like, threw snowballs at cars or exit people? That's normal. All right, I will say that we did have one that it wasn't.

There was no, no one got hurt, but there was coming out of the dining hall, there was a, there was like a big building, and we would try to throw an orange from the dining hall over the building. That may, maybe someone got hurt. That makes sense, though. It was like a round object. How do you come up with with cone? I think initially it was it was like anything. We were driving and someone had a cone

and he was like done with it and we're like, oh, throw it at that person. What is it? What is that? That's not a thing. Done with the cone. You're done with it when you've eaten it. Yeah, I don't know.

This guy was, I wasn't a throw. We had a guy who, I swear to God, he was like the Randy Johnson of cone throwing. Did you ever get hit with one? See, I've been hit with other things. And I've always said, like, if I'm never, Just no. No, no, no.

I've never gotten hit with one. And I understand people would be like, oh, that's a dick move. Like, we were like 19 years old. We were idiots. Of course it's fucking stupid. But I always say, if I'm ever on the side of the road

and someone smokes me with a puddle, I'll just tip my cat and be like, I deserve that. Yeah. You know? No, listen, I understand the, like, that is a fun game to play. It's just the waste of the ice cream.

Like, I used to play a game where my friends and I, like, if we'd go get coffee or ice coffee or something, like, you'd slap it out of their hands, right? we walk out of the store. Yeah. Just like dumb shit.

Yeah. Like you then go buy them another coffee, but it would be funny for a moment. The waste of the cone. But we had unlimited ammo. We had. But that's not, there's a dining hall. We can get it every day if we want. There's kids who just don't have cones.

Yeah, I guess. You guys have a good dining hole? I had a not really. Not good one. Like I'm saying, we had ethics. There were rules. Like, we could never throw it a gentleman's game? Yes.

If we saw some. someone who looked like a little like nerdyer they got picked on we're like no we're not ruining you were you were targeting strangers yeah this is all strangers yes oh my god so no i take back everything i said because the things that i would do were just with my best friend oh no we would throw in a go into strangers yeah i would hit coffee out of my best friend's hand and then go buy him another one are you hitting them in the face you just like like a chest shot what dude that's real rude your day if we saw like a fucking meathead we'd be like ah fuck that guy i don't know he'll be fine would anyone ever like try to fight you guys oh yeah this one jogger fucking ran it

it's hard and we're like that's actually a thrill yeah it would it's like throwing snowballs at a car yes exactly that that was a thrill but the snowballs you're not gonna eat yeah i mean i'm not defending the you know the ethics of the ice cream that was wrong but like like and if someone looked like they're having a bad day it's like no we're not thrown but what does that mean like they're they're hanging their head and kicking the rock in front of them yeah like you could tell that guy just failed a fucking psych final you know like he's clean you got the look on your face that you

he's clean let's not throw ice cream on his chest yeah yeah you're a menace Eddie I was 19 and I would love to know the hit rate on like your reading of guys having good days and bad days this guy looks happy let's ruin it yeah yeah yeah do you think there's a chance of someone like committed suicide after yeah no no no well you don't know could have been the last straw ed yeah the happiest guy could

someone's having the worst day of his life yeah standing in the mirror and he's like, you know what? I have to do it. I have to put on a brave face. I'm going to smile. I'm going to smile through the pain. Uh-huh. And I'm going to walk to the dining hall. I'm going to get a good meal and I'm going to turn my life around. You walk straight to the dining hall. Fucking ice cream right on his chest. You happy piece of shit. Take this swirl cone. Were you like a prankster? Yeah. Dude, we just like to fuck around. Like I, you've never gotten. No, I would moon people. I would drive by people. Yeah, but that was like way younger. Yeah.

I was, small, the cars. Well, yeah, you, I mean, you,

the shit on the show. That's what I'm talking about. Did you guys ever get caught throwing snowballs at cars? Yes, I did. I got caught when I was like 10, and then this guy, it was actually not the guy through the snowball at.

It was the guy behind the guy. And he was like, he caught us and was like, I know someone who died when they got hit with a snowball, like in their car, they hit, they ran off the road and hit like a pole. He definitely made that.

Oh, yeah. But it definitely scarred me. Oh, for sure. But that's the thing. I remember the van like stopped and chased us all and we ran. Oh, that's such a thrill. And I looked at my buddy and I could tell he could keep going. I was like, I'm on again.

We got to stop. I'll take the beat. So were you walking by people and throwing it or were you drive by? We were drive by. That's so mean. Listen. I kind of wish you had gotten shot. So it just gets in with a coat and just pulls out their gun?

Like, all right, fine. Boom. I've gotten hit with shit But you got I'm sure you guys Got some gotten hit with it It's one time I was Ride my bike

And this kid popped off From behind a tree He didn't throw one egg In me He had a whole case And he threw the whole case Covered me dude Yeah

And I'm like Game respects to get I've gotten like a bucket Of like cigarette Ashes before What? Yeah Well I deserved it

I called someone like a pussy A drive-by pussy Yeah And then he came up And it was a red light And he came up with like it was like cigarette ashes and water it was disgusting he just poured it right in my face oh my god in the front seat yeah that's i deserved it though because we were you know you drive

by go what's up pussy yeah ever do that oh man yeah 18 19 years kids high school this was a common thing was the the idea of strangers throwing shit at other strangers was it was common enough in your life that like it didn't register that throwing ice cream cones that people out of cars was kind of wild it was wild but like because you seem to like keep saying like you know you guys never been hit by anything i have i i don't remember a time of my life where i was like walking on a sidewalk and like so driving by through like a muffin at me or something i got smoked by paintballs like oh yeah dude that was like a thing are you worried now that if you're walking down the street someone might randomly cone you

then I that's baseball that's it that's it that is baseball that is baseball that is baseball I got something that's up your alley a buddy turn me on to oakley forums.com it is a forum of dudes

it's still active they have multiple threads about multiple topics but the one that I was put onto was dudes posting pictures of themselves and their Oakley's. They're posted selfies. They get on a floor.

And it's like an old school forum. Like, yes. Oh my God. It's set up exactly how I'd want it to be set up. Yeah. Yeah. And we, uh, I brought this to mostly today. And we were scrolling through it. And then we were like investigating.

They have other threads. One of them was like, what are we eating today? And everyone's taking pictures of their dinner. Oh, this is awesome. And it's all just dudes that are wearing Oakley's. Holy fuck. How would you find that? These guys are sick.

One of my friends sent it to me, a buddy. I have a buddy that's into weird shit like this. I love that it's old school too. Yeah. We need to bring back these type of forum. I don't know how much they interact with each other. It's just like. Oh, wait, Brad Dubb.

Go back to Brad. Yeah. That's what I'm talking about, Brad. Low Bridge. Wait, what do you say? Relevant. Revenant Elite Emerald. That's the lens color.

Can we just see what else Brad Dubbs talking about? Can we? I should work at Oakley. This is bio. It's incredible. Ah, shit. Got to get an account. Got to make an account.

Oh, whoa. Resident Alien? Yo. That guy is. That guy is. I don't want to be involved with that guy. There's literally tens of thousands of posts, like pages of this. From like decades.

We're on page 27,000. 27. That's no. Hell yes. These guys are awesome. And yeah. And they're not doing it. They're not doing it for likes or followers or anything.

This is love of the game shit, man. What's on your plate? Yeah. This one cracked us. This is we found this. There's just dudes eating. You got to get in here and post burger picks. Yeah.

If you added up this entire, how many pages was the forum for guys wearing? 28,000, 27,000. If you added up all the Miss Child support in that form. How many millions do you? Small country GDP. $270,000 posts. What are you wearing today? 270,000.

And what's the oldest post? How long? 2011. Oh, my God. Going on for a guy just said, yeah, my canvas fuels on. Dude, we need a picture. What are we doing? Yeah, find the first selfie.

So these are the glasses. Try to find the... Yeah, go to the page one. The first guy to show his face wearing the last. Oh, this is page, oh, they are, okay, okay. So who was the, who was like, yeah. Oh, it is. That's the guy.

Oakley Ron! Reply to a guy that said this. You guys need a on cooler with Facebook. Oakley Ron. You guys need him on. You changed the game. Broke barriers, dude. Lifetime member.

If you want to see my pretty face so bad, here you go. Oakley fucking Ron. Dude, who followed Oakley Ron? Who followed Oakley Ron? That's what I'm talking about. guy. I want to see you next. That's what I'm talking about.

It's another than you see a pick of them. It's also something entirely different to see them actually on Facebook. On Facebooks can make or break someone's decision to purchase them. Hope it catches on. All right. And little did he know. Who followed. I love this too because these guys are like, oh, yeah.

These guys are all 60 now. What is it? What does it shirt say? I'm probably lying. Probably lied. Hard. Oh, hell yeah. I like this too because it's like a group of dudes that.

take themselves as the most masculine and they accidentally do like the gayest thing like sharing pictures with each other online nah dude we're just fucking boys sharing each other's pictures we need some face-mix in here oh look at that

told me I look good yeah you have rate my Oakley's smash or pass isn't this incredible you can just oh I love it so much these guys Rock. They figured

life out. Oh, whoa. Julian Wilson Dispatch with Slate idiom lenses today. Badness. Oh, and the perfect facial hair. That is that, those... Yeah, it's far. I think he gets the Free Oakley's when he walks in

with that facial hair. They're like, sir, you need... Oh, look at the hat. You see? Good lead. These guys are the best. Well, that's the same guy. Oh, he got rid of the face. facial hair.

These guys are tight I thought you might like this. I love it. There's some great frames in this forum. Oh, yeah. 15 years. Zach, you set up an account?

Yeah, my login. Yeah, my login. Who would be the funniest guy in there one time? Who would be the funniest if we, yeah, we're scrolling and we're like, wait, we know that. Oh, my gosh.

White Sox Dave is probably on there. Oh, White So, yeah. Yeah, he's on there. I'd love to see, yeah, like, or like quigs. Like, what? Wait a second. Random, dude.

That fucking rock. Like, it's very, this is from an hour ago. Yeah. So it's like it's extremely. It's exactly. Yeah, dude, it's like active. Yeah, people just pop on their Oakley's and then, and then hit submit on a pick. It's more active than threads.

Yeah. I think this is a better. These are all within the last hour. Dude, we, I think we all. I want to talk to one of these guys. I think we all have to join it. And then just how do we get in touch with one of these guys? I guess.

Oakley Ron, though. Like just any of the, if you've submitted one of these, I want to talk to you and be like, what's up with this? If you're an active user on. Have you ever done a meetup? Like, I got a lot of questions. I guess that's kind of my. I only, yeah. All the Oakley's.

I've only scratched the surface on this. My buddy sent me this and I scroll through this thread. I haven't even begun. I mean, there's so many other threads about other things. Oh, yeah. I don't know if they feed up. These are all like you click into this and then you get all the threads. So if you want to talk sunglasses.

discussions, this is where all the sunglasses discussions are happening. Okay. The interesting one that I think that there's probably like a lot is in off topic. Go to off topic. You go on off topic. There's dudes posting dog picks. There's dudes posted. What really grinds your gears? Like there's unlimited. No, no, hit that.

I want to see what really grinds your gear. I love that there's a section off topic too. I need to vent you made two. My current frustrations, eBay sellers with buy it now our best offer. right. This might get like, wait,

what is this at work? What is that word? What? Bitches. Oh, F words? It could be anywhere. I don't know how deep you want to get live.

I do. That could be anything. Oh, I want to get deep live. There's a lot of, I want to get deep live. Six asterisks and then an S is like, that could be anything.

Yeah, that's, That's the word. Yeah. That's what started this thread, by the way. Was this guy? I got to make it. Oh, wait.

Hold on. We have a tool who honestly is going to be fired soon, just looking for an excuse. Well, he thought it would be funny to chuck my M frames across the shop today because I took them off for a moment and set them down to wipe my face. They're no worse for wear since someone caught them. But, ooh, boy. Was he about to get a tongue lashing before someone quickly took him away from me? He hasn't been with the company very. long so he doesn't know unlike everyone else how I am with my glasses which is

besides the point I told I'm told he said something like what they're just safety glasses have fun in the employment line you little for shit you little yeah it's gotta be shit right there's all right let's get let's go down I want to see some more grind recent I love years or yeah yeah do a recent one yeah what's the most recent okay oh Tuesday Wednesday not answering I've called people got no I've left voicemail. We've got no answer. Unless you've dense, the pattern behavior is quite obvious. If I'm asking people we interact with day, day, don't answer.

All right, that sounds like people don't. They're probably intimidated by your Oakley's, if we're being honest. Wait, people who never met my mom offered their condolences. It turns of someone I knew through work for a decade. He and I went to every year. He came to our Halloween party for years. We talked daily, and despite knowing my mom was severely ill and likely to pass, he just stopped communicating.

He knew my mom passed because the funeral was communicated to everyone. he knew. Ozae associated with took off from work and came to the church, not him. Oh yeah, that is shitty. Okay. I agree with you. That's a fucked up thing. If you're a coworker not to even say, hey, sorry about your mom.

All right, go back. When people sell stuff, then delete the price. Leave your prices visible, folks. I agree. Look at that. Yeah. That's a sick. Stewie with the fucking guns and two glocks.

Fucking love family. Oh, fuck. Look at the Oakley. They got the gifts. Yeah. Fucking love family This is unbelievable Fake people

Those who don't go This guy This guy specifically is having a problem With no one wanted to talk to him I'll try to keep this short He said in this first of six pairs And follow-ups I need some more grind

Fire alarm testing Especially the 15 minute battery test Okay Switching bait sellers Looks like a lot of these guys Are having trouble with eBay Yeah What was that?

I feel obligated tell to warn my followers of Oakley collectors and friends about something that happened to me recently I met a guy through Facebook after seeing many great pictures in rare prices we end up making a deal for an original factory Ruby Penny with Box Oh he got scammed, yeah That'll happen

Yeah, this feels like a whole group of guys that can get scammed a lot Because they probably don't even see the prices Because they never take off their Oakley's Why that was just a news? The picture of a news Just a picture of a news I want more grind the gears.

Sick jet, though. This is, this could be a week long deep time. This might be an infinite, I feel like a portal because more it's posted as we look at them. Yeah. Okay. I feel bad Nick and KB aren't here. Yeah, no, we'll have to bring it back up on Monday. We just got to send it to KB and he'll come back with the best stuff.

Like, you know, he'll, he'll, like, KB, clear your schedule. You got to, you got to dig deep in here. Wanoi might be in here. But Winoi should be in here. Oh, dude. Wanoi would have a field day in here. Oh, Mike Hunt. Mike Hunt.

Wait, this guy, Medusa, is just posting a lot about the grinding gears. I've seen his name post a lot. These guys keep getting scared. It's crazy. I'm going to eBay. Flash floods, power outers, almost non-existent internet connection, just enough to complain about it. Can't post a single photo right now. got his Oakley's in his hand.

Dude, his fucking basement is flooded. He's like, the real problem is no one can see my Oakley's day. I want to post a picture. Guys can't even see these shades. Those sucks. Oh, man. That's Mark Titus. Yeah.

Yeah, you need that. Send me that meme, TJ. Repurpose it. Whoa. Host alone. This grinds my gears. Broccoli. Bump.

This is incredible. This is old school internet. This is just not. Yeah. This is what the internet used to be and it used to be so fun. And there's just, it's just a bunch of dudes. There's no sarcasm.

There's no irony poisoning. This is extremely active too. Yeah. This is all going on right now. If you're longing for old internet, we got to find the Oakley forums. Yeah, like I would imagine most of these guys, they don't even know like Twitter, Instagram, Reddit exists.

Don't need it. This is the internet. There's no Rayban fans coming in peace. No. No, this is the internet to these guys is porn hub and the Oakley. That's it. I would believe that most of these posts are from desktop too. A lot of these guys don't have apps.

Cooking and home. All right, go back to general discussions. Go back to the off topic. Yeah, what other topics are got? Okay. What does it look like? Memes? There's one of just...

Wait, there's only fans after dark? That's O.F is Oakley Forums. Oh, do memes. But maybe the same thing is happening. Wait, do memes. I'll see some of these memes are cooking up. This is the first meme post in the year. You all play two...

He's got the Oakley. This is so good. My daughter's like, Daddy, can you get my balloon? No, the fuck I cannot. It's down there. Anyways. I hate when doctors ask questions like, are you sexually active? Depends on what you mean by active.

There are plenty of active volcanoes that haven't gone off in over 50 years. What? That guy's got some pen. He's got some pen up rage that he's just taking out on the Oaken Farm. Her, I'm really into older guys. Me trying to impress her. Would you like a Wither's original? I don't mean to brag, but my post are enjoyed by well over two.

people worldwide. Yeah. What the fuck? X. Yeah. Don't keep calling. These are so good. These aren't even memes.

I bought a porn DVD today and all I could see was a dark image of a fat guy holding his dung. Then I realized the TV wasn't on. Oh, no. These are just, these are jokes just written out. Oh. Oh. TJ, stay on that shit.

Women with makeup. Women without makeup. That's a great meme. TJ, send me that one. TJ, send me that one. I need that. Wait, I want to take it. Go back to that.

I want to take a picture of that one. The Oakley Forum. How long did you guys talk about it, by the way? Did you guys get into this part of it? No. No, I brought it up at the end of the show. We looked at the food and dogs one. Yeah.

Just dudes posting dog picks. Yeah, I was sent this last week by my buddy. He just stumbled upon it? Yeah, I don't even know how he did. Like, I don't know if he saw it on Reddit or something. And it was just like, this is up your alley he sent me the one where they're posting pictures

of themselves every day and I thought that was all it was and then a couple days later I'd like hit the back button and I saw all the other forums and I'm just now were those from this Monday yeah this guy

yeah it seems to have just dumped all of his memes from the weekend when your shadow one day at 630 a.m. He wakes up and he's just like these are all the best ones I saw can you text KB right now and see if he'll zoom in real quick quick. We got to get him

on this now. I do think I was holding it for KV and Nick and then it came up today on mostly sports. No, listen. If we get KB on this Monday will be like he'll have that. We have to have KB on this. Yeah. Women with makeup, women without I'm tweeting that meme. Unbelievable. So good. How many memes are in?

How many pages? 1,500. It's so awesome. Are these guys that have their life figured out Or their lives have completely fallen apart? I don't know I think these are the happiest guys Yeah, they seem happy

Right? Except for when they get scammed on eBay, which seems to happen frequently. But it's easy to say that these guys are sad and lonely. No, no, no. I don't know that's the case. Like, they're probably... I think they're happier online than any.

anyone. Yeah. Yeah. Like everyone, people go online, they're like, get mad at things. I think they go on and it's still fun. Right. Enjoyable experience. And I also think like, I think their wives are significant others like, no, like, all right, like dinner six to seven. And then and then Bob's going to go to the desktop in the, in the living room. He's going to hop on the Oakley for him. I'm going to sit. I'm going to knit something and the couch next to him. That's our quality time together. Yeah. He's going to be on the Oakley forum. We're in the same room. And we're just like, you know, this is a great marriage. Like, I think they are happy. Zach, you got to get your PC fix, man. I got to get in there. Yeah. I got to keep. Dude, I think we all have to get in there. I'll tell you one thing. Like, Zach on the forum. We got a pivot from Twitter straight to this forum. There is not a place in this country that will sell. the 4th of July harder than the Oakwood. Oh, that's right.

That's going to be incredible. We need a reminder. Dude, they're going to come back after the 4th. We got to check the form of. Oh, the memes for 4th of July. You know they got like special shades that they wear. On the boat, on the 4th. Anybody in Jacksonville?

No one helped him. Zia will. We go back to memes. I need to see more memes. I just went into the after dark one just to see what it was. It's like you can't post porn on this website, I guess. Love it. It's just like porn memes.

It's like memes about porn stars and memes about... Love that. About tits and memes about... Yeah. It's like... It's 2012 Facebook memes about porn. This is awesome. Oh, my God.

War's One. Happy Mother's Day. And if you're a guy in there lurking trying to scam these guys, fuck you. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Don't be weird. No, do not be weird.

Let this place, this is, you're basically like, we're basically time traveling. This is what the internet used to be. It was just, instead of one plate, like, instead of Reddit where everyone just becomes a cynical, like, piece of shit and just bitches about the things they love, there used to be forums that were separated by niche, and people would just go on them and just love the thing and stay pure. It's good to know that that's still alive in the pockets. Right. Yeah, yeah. Gives me some hope. Yeah.

It's refreshing in a way. Yeah, like bring back this internet. Mm-hmm. This is the internet that we all signed up for. Somewhere we've lost our way, but Oakley, man. Now we got the Oakley Bros. Yeah. Why did some girl send you a picture of herself in a thong?

I was going to buy that for you. Then why did she send you a picture of her without a thong? She must have sold it. God. Yeah, she probably bought that too. This guy's the main post. Beesians eat what? Northica's a demon.

Northica's got memes for days. Lesbiansy. Oh, that's a fish. Salmon exposed to cocaine can swim longer distances. That's not even a meat. No. That's just a news alert. Okay.

It just drops at all. I love being pegged two years. No fights. I love my man. Okay. Dr. Pegger. Okay. Huh.

All right. Watch how effortlessly I steal this meet. Dude, we might have to hire Norfolkah. Shit just got real. What? It's a Swedish chef. Yeah. He's like Gordon Ramsey.

She just got real. Okay. Oh, chef on chef. Yeah. Rivalry. Some sort of rival, Ray. Give this kid a medal. What is it?

I don't even understand it. Because you don't know, like, where these lines cross. Oh. Technically, he's right. Yeah. When I didn't in 1896, 1895, what was, okay? Yeah. It's good.

It's really good. Give this kid a medal. This kid of it. Okay. I love that. These are great memes. Just like that, I'm banned from Victoria's secrets. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Uh-oh.

Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Decaffeating a copy of your age? Yes. Oh, it's an adrenaline. Like an adrenaline. Keep going, DJ. Oh, man.

Reid, you like that one. That was adrenaline there. We all thought it. We all thought it. But we were all... Are we ready to do... Are we ready to unveil this? The banner?

I feel like we should. Where is it? It's up. in the rafter. Oh, wow. It's going to be there forever. I also don't see it, Brandon. I'm also having a hard eye up there.

It's up there. We'll see that little scroll. It's up there. I think it's where it's your gauntlet thing used to be, maybe. What? They took down. By the Davis. Wait,

where's yours? Did chef get it? Big Cat, you know, you know Titus and I played against each other? Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, no, no, no. We didn't play. No, we did.

He played. And I watched. What were your stats in that game? Yeah. I think I had eight points. I turned over a lot. That's three turnovers. We got beat by like 12 or 13.

Evan Turner was unbelievable. I had like a billion points. How did you have, Titus? I didn't put any shots up. I was playing team ball. So I was a big like club trillion. I was playing. Oh, love it.

I was obsessed with it. I thought it was hilarious. It was fascinating. And so it was tough though because we, you know, we got her ass beat. And you're in the line, but I wanted to acknowledge Titus. So I like kind of awkwardly. I'm like, hey, big fan. He looked at me.

like bro what is wrong with you after that moment I kind of hated him I was a deuce like I was giving you props but I think he was so turned off like dude you shouldn't be saying this in the in the line I'm like big big club trillion fan that's awesome yeah yeah I was probably taking it I think I actually

do remember that happening and I was probably just taking it back that like because it happened a lot with the guys who were the walk-ons on the other team but you were like an actual player so I was just like is he is he fucking with me like I see why would a That's awesome. I thought you were like walk-on to put you up to it or something.

Yeah. All right. But this is an incredible ban. Do you guys want a speech? Yes. All right. Thank you, everyone, for being here today. We're here to commemorate Florida State 2020,

the number 14 in the country when COVID canceled the season. Do you want to see something? No, I think you can crush it. Okay. Yeah, let's go Seminoles. And here's to raising the national championship banner next year. And we'll put one of those up too. All right, you want to count it down?

All right, three, two, one, go. Wow. It looks great. It is much funnier. That works really well. Why did they put NCAA cancel? Cancel makes it way funny. Like you could have just had a banner that said number four.

Four final ranking. They still were. Cancel almost feels. That's what makes it so funny. It's all next. It's all void. CAA cancel. It's crazy.

Congrats on that. Wow. I want to know. They had to have a meeting, right? Like, what's going to go on the banner? Yeah. Did they maybe think about putting COVID in there? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I think obviously the first thing they wanted was number four final ranking. And then they decided 20 years from now, somebody needs to know that there was a reason. There was a reason. Yeah. So I actually think if NCAA canceled wasn't on it.

Yeah, I don't know. There was a better way to do this. There's like NCAA canceled. Well, no, they did finish number four in the final ranking, correct? Final ranking, yeah, yeah. You didn't have to say, you didn't have to say it was canceled at all. Yeah, but then it's like if you finished final four, it's it mean you went to the final four. Right.

It implies you a lot. But it doesn't say final four. It just says we finished number four. It's also so funny because like I said, they have the ACC regular season championship banner, which that counts. You didn't need to do anything else. Right. Yeah.

You had it. Yeah. You already honored the team. Yeah. You caught the true accomplishment. It's beautiful. That's got some length to it. Yeah.

That's a much bigger. And it's nice how it's hanging. It looks like the right dead center. Forever in our rafters. That's great. It's a beautiful home. Another banner comes along, then we'll move that one too, I guess. Yeah.

If and when we do get to the final four, we have to hang. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Well any any accomplishments that you guys have future we will absolutely sure yeah we'll move my other one too just keep moving tight as it down Just keep moving my shit out of the way. Is this the key to Norfolk Nebraska? Is this? Is this? Can you get that for you? Just land it Throw it against the wall. Brandon Give it to me

What the fuck off. Dude is this the no key rests here within the space though one awaits in another place. It's empty boxes but a clue. Norfolk holds the key for you. Whoa. My God. Your key awaits in Norfolk. Contact this guy to unlock what's next. Oh, no. Oh, no. Hey, did you get con? Stephen told us it was. There's no key? Oh, no, Stephen. I didn't want to open your gift. He said he sent me the key. I got to contact Nick Stevenson.

to unlock what's next you have to go to Norfolk I gotta go to fucking Nebraska Jay scheduled a one-on-one with all of us to tell us that he had the key for you literally pulled me aside and like a genuine

one-on-one private minute he pulled me aside he goes check this out and I was like what he's like I got the key to Norfolk Nebraska for brain we were so excited for you

your key awaits in Norfolk I gotta go get it you have to get so much worse you had to be at a you just got punished. The guy I reached out to me. It was very legit and was like, we're sending it.

They sent it Monday. And, uh, yeah, I didn't open it, obviously, because I thought I wanted to leave that for you. Why is that a fork? What does it say underneath it? Is this a restaurant? North Fork? Uh, because saying it wrong

feels so right. You'll call it Norfolk. Norfolk? People call it Norfolk? I'll call it Norfolk. You have to go. Right now? Yes.

Driving into the weather. Oh, that's such. She just gave you work. That sucks. Wait a minute. Now, a visitor's guide? Oh, Steve. That sucks.

I got duped. You really did. That was not meant to be a duping. You walked around with the box showing all of us. It was like, I have the key. I could go the River Point District. It looks incredible. Yeah, you can kayak through the city.

Go to Elkhorn Valley Museum and Research Center. Oh, no. Shee. I'm so sorry. I'm so excited. I'm sorry. Yeah, I got God. Was anyone going to be around that area in the next week?

No, I'm going to Norfolk, Nebraska, and getting the fucking... Wasn't Ben Mintz going to be in Omaha? Right up the road. I'll drop you in the face. All right. Interesting facts about Norfolk in 1868. German farmers asked that a post office be established for their town. German what?

German farmers, Bowers. Be established for their town of Norfolk. home of Thirl Ravenscroft really who's that's the frosted flakes tiger isn't um oh he also did the the grinch song did he not

um Johnny Carson I'm fucking high this is been a weird Nick yeah we try we tried this we just sampled this fucking infused beverage what has like a delayed effect I had went to the bathroom

to try to like breathe annually I didn't have ran out with the briefs. I've been looking at you. I thought you were too. You're doing a better job than me. But no. Then you looked over at me. You went like this.

And I don't know what that meant. I was trying to tell you not. Why didn't you do that? You went like this down your eye. I want you looking at my face on the fucking selfie camera. Yeah. I'm going to email this guy. Oh, man.

It was just sitting up in our studios, this can of T-E-Sulfing. I just took a little bit oh man Ravenscroft Kyle thorough ravenscroft is that real yeah I can't look at Nick