The Yak - This Episode is Officially Level 20 | The Yak 6-5-23

Episode Date: June 5, 2023

I'm going to Iceland, I'm going to IcelandYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Okay, hold that up. Hello. Hey, everyone. It's the Yak. Sponsored by Roback. R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com. Promo code Yak.

20% off your first purchase. Roback.com. Promo code Yak. I'm wearing the t-shirt right now. I love it. They got hoodies. They got jog Yak. I'm wearing the t-shirt right now. I love it. They got hoodies. They got joggers. Yeah, you like it?

Love it. Joggers, hoodies, shorts, Q-zips, polos. Roback.com. Use code Yak for 20% off the most comfortable clothes in the world. Roback.com. Promo code Yak. As of right now, it's me, Kate, Sass, and KB. This is Yakagami for sure.

I know for a fact it is. It has to be. I think Ronan's here. Brandon is sitting eating his Chick-fil-A. He said he has an insurance call. Doesn't look like he's calling anyone. He's just eating his Chick-fil-A. Will you move that cap?

The big cap, Kate? Oh, yes. Pardon me. We can just see Brandon's fat face. There he is. Look at him. It's an insurance call. He said, I have an insurance call. Didn't he, Sass? He did. He came in and said, I have a home insurance call. Home insurance call.

He got all guilty. Yeah. He's like, what? What? That's Instagram. He's on Instagram. He's looking at titties eating his chick-fil-a a lot of titties on kate how was your birthday yesterday it was great it was really good low-key i kind of feel like once you're past 30 whatever i am you forget i had to look up how old i had to look up how old i am no I did. I was off by a year. I'm also bad at math, so there's that. But it was really nice.

I went to this charity event in Philly. I know. It was nice, though. Ideal birthday. Ideal birthday. It was nice, but it wasn't fun. I got to see some family I hadn't seen in a while. It's always nice.

It sounds even worse. Yeah. Oh, damn. I know. Yeah, it's worse than the charity. Seeing some old family you barely get to see go into a charity event. Ask your questions. Terrible birthday.

I'm sorry. Did you acknowledge it? I can't drink anymore. What am I supposed to do? Yeah, he was pumped. He thought it was his birthday. Yeah. He thought the cake was his, the candles were his.

He was like, he was very excited. A lot of birthday envy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Once you get past 30, the birthdays don't matter. No. And then once you get, I think I'll have to actually have a party when I turn 40 in a year and a half.

Yes, I think about that. That'll be an easy one, though. Party. Yeah. Yeah. I think, too, no matter what I did for my birthday It wouldn't have compared to the darts That everyone was at

Because I kept looking at my So it was on Saturday And I kept looking And I was like wow This darts thing looks amazing It looked like they had like the best The best day ever I know I need a recap

TJ was the king of darts Zaha were you there? Zaha was not there Rona was there I did laugh because it was Sitting at home watching on Twitter and Instagram. It was like a bunch of drunk dudes that every like 25 minutes or so had to remind themselves what they were doing that day. They just started chanting darts. Darts.

Like, hey, why are we here? Darts, darts, darts. Anyone actually watch the darts or no? Surprisingly, yeah. I think a lot of people not only watch But like knew what was going on Yeah It looked like so much fun I almost came

So did I brother Yeah It was that good But then I realized I would be the sober guy Showing up to a hell of a party And that would suck That was my mindset Yeah

Can't do that Can't do that I mean Owen was in the building He Yeah. Can't do that. Can't do that. I mean, Owen was in the building. He's sober. He can do that. He's got it down to his science. He was also there

from the beginning so he got all the inside dart jokes. People doing shenanigans at the bar. TJ, is he here? Yep.

Give me three goats, three woats of the dart jokes. Yeah. Wait, can I add a goat early on? Oh, you can add it too. They're linked with this show. Wait, can I add a goat early on? Oh, you can add it too. Their link with this show, dude.

Garrett. Garrett went goaded? Garrett went goaded. What did he do? Full send. Full speed. He went full send. Garrett's the kind of guy, Garrett does the thumbnails for this show and does an awesome job. But he's the kind of guy that

when he gets a little booze in him, his true accent comes out oh he's a chicago guy so garrett was talking fucking heavy in chicago and he was just uh in rare form great vibes just uh being so nice to everybody he was fucking he garrett garrett ruled so he's definitely one of my goats. TJ, if you have any other goats and woats, please. Meek Phil. Was it a goat or a woat? It had to have been a woat.

No, it was funny. He was a goat? There's some videos of him and Quig singing Mr. Brightside together. Okay. Meek Phil was Meek Phil, and he was pretty funny. Okay. Other goats? I don't know.

Everybody was a dude. You got to give us a woat. Give us a woat. They may not have Bothered you But they were still Three woes Not great for the vibes Someone passed out

Someone Someone got Too drunk Chuck passed out I saw that He's a woe Okay woated Did anyone else

Leave early Max had to do Something stupid I think Ken Jack Left early I heard some people Talking about how They got sick

At the very end How like They went a little Too hard And a bunch of people got sick. Oh. So let's get some names. You can go six votes if you need to.

Yeah. Here's Chuck. That's a great picture, though. Yeah, that's why it's hard to vote him. It's not a vote. It's not a vote. He was actually very goaty the entire time. Yeah, he went as hard as he possibly can.

I respect the hell out of that. He went until the wheels fell off. So he was locked the fuck in. I mean, you could easily vote Max and Jack McCarthy for not going. They went for a little nice weekend at the shore. Avalon, yeah, which is like the opposite vibe of darts. You could tell, too, that he knows he made the wrong decision. Oh, yeah. Because even I was sitting at home, had tremendous FOMO, which is something I don't

really experience anymore because I just don't have the time to get drunk and then be hungover. I was even like, this would have been worth it. Fucked up. Did you guys see the fight that happened there? Yeah. Can we show that video? It was nuts.

They look like old British dudes or something. Oh, shit. Oh, the guy in the Stone Cold. Oh, he's got Mankind helping him? Mankind in a Stone Cold. Did he hit him with Mr. Socko? Is he crying? Oh.

Was this you guys who filmed this or this was? No, no, no. This is a couple sections over. Oh, my God. They're fighting in full wrestling gear I love it But I mean that's darts though That's the whole darts culture

Oh that guy's fucked up Holy shit Oh I hear the Brits It took so long for the crowd to react To this huge fight happening in the middle of people It was over by the time anybody knew It was even happening I want to see Mr. Socko again.

He hit him with the sock. He was pummeling. He just pushed his ass. He pointed at him. That point. Yeah, I would have had my money on the bald guys before the fight. Yes, 100%. They look like career fighters.

Right. And we had Rich Eisen on PMT today, and I was getting into, like, bald is definitely, like, you have to do a double take. Like, is this guy naturally bald, or is he a skinhead? Yeah. Right. And those guys are kind of straddling the line

where you don't know. They're a mixed bag. Right. Some of them are doing it out of love, and some of them are doing it out of necessity. Was there a big, because, I mean, you guys made it such a thing last year, and this year I feel like everybody was talking it up for so long. Was there a bunch of people that were like,

yo, we're just here because you guys brought it up? And was there like, I can see more bachelor parties and more like, I don't know. Was there a five shift? Yeah, was it more of a phenomenon this year than last year? It was definitely more crowded this year than last year. It seemed like it was like, what, 100 plus people from Barstool? I think our ticket load was 145. Holy shit.

Fuck. A lot of people like brought friends and stuff. Yeah, not all Barstool. Barstool adjacent for sure. Yeah. But, yeah, I mean, people who are going to work at Barstool one day. Yeah. I think that PFT kind of like.

He was goaded. He was goaded he was goaded he was like as as kind of like a senior guy the mantle was kind of thrust on him max gave him dart father yeah and and so he had to he had to kind of wear that burden and i think that he i mean he fucking crushed it but i think that he was like heavy lies the crown it was like a lot for it for him it was like uncomfortable to be like okay i have to be in charge that he was like heavy lies the crown. It was like a lot for him. It was like uncomfortable to be like, okay, I have to be in charge. But he just like picked up the fucking flag and was giving speeches. I saw him on a balcony getting like an entire bar going. The dart walk over.

When did you join? I got there as he was giving his speech. Oh, nice. I like pulled up to the bar as he was giving his speech. Said what's up to him. He's like, you. Oh, nice. I pulled up to the bar as he was giving his speech, said what's up to him. He's like, you've got to do the dart walk over. And I was like, you have the dart walk. It is within you to do the dart walk over there.

There goes Chuck right now. He's fine. See, he's fine. Yeah, he's back. He's walking around. He's fine. Great. Everybody was boozed up.

Booze was boozed up. Large. I saw a video of him Wearing like the ice helmet The next day A lot of people were Who was TJ who was the Person who was

Drunkest that you didn't At least expected Maybe a quiet guy That could be a sneaky woad Yeah Well no it could be a goat Why are you trying to woad I don't think there was

There has to be a woad There has to be a woad Yeah Maybe it was me then. 145 people. It's measurable. How much joy someone or how little joy someone gave you. I don't know.

It was just good vibes. It's like nobody was like picking woes. No one was like, oh, you suck. It was like last year there was like infighting and stuff. I don't think there was any of that. Oh, there was? Yeah, like Quigs and Donnie's brother got into like a spat or like a vape or something. I don't think there was any of that. Oh, there was? Yeah, like Quigs and Donnie's brother got into a spat or a vape or something. I don't think there was any of that this year, at least that I know of.

Maybe I just stay out of the bad vibes. Damn. Mikey Fowler was in this fight. He was good vibes. He's good vibes. He's good vibes. Garrett was my sneaky drunkest. Rona, I got a question for you.

You puked? Dude, not got a question for you. You puked? Dude, not long after I saw you. Yeah. So Friday night you puked after dinner? Yeah, dude. It was fucking brutal. I was walking to dinner in our neighborhood with my wife and just randomly saw you. Yeah, I puked out.

Yeah, just passing by. And then I had a lovely dinner, great stimulating conversation, some glasses of white wine, and I got the hiccups from too much wine. And my wife, I got down the steps outside the restaurant. She hopped out from behind a pillar and was like, ah, kind of got me in the stomach trying to scare the hiccups out of me. And it just made me throw up.

You throw up on the spot? On the sidewalk, yeah. I really wish you had video. Like multiple mouthfuls. I need a ring camera. I was like, what the fuck? I was like, what the fuck? Because it just started making me throw up.

Scaring doesn't get the hiccups out of me. I don't scare like that. I wasn't scared. I knew I was walking home with her. Was she cracking up or was she like, oh my God, I'm so sorry? No, she wasn't sorry. She was like, but I was like, what the fuck? And she was like, what the fuck to you?

And I still had the hiccups. Like, I didn't kick the hiccups. I just had to, but I know how to kick them myself. I just had to focus. Damn it, I wish I had seen that. I really wish I had. Yeah, if you saw me at that end of the walk, like leaving dinner as opposed to going to dinner. I just wanted a video of you throwing up.

You know how I love throw up videos. It was so fucking funny. Was it good coming out? The meal? I didn't remember having that much acid reflux. Of course, I had a nice bronzino. I showed you a picture of the bronzino. Yeah, the bronzino looked delicious.

I went to town on it, but a bronzino is not that aesthetic of a meal. Just comes right back up. Yeah, just popped back up with a fucking... That's like the worst to throw up when you're not that drunk and you just spent a lot of money on an expensive, nice meal.

Yes. Uh-oh. Did you eat a second dinner? I would have eaten a second dinner. I would have been excused to go get like a burger. Yeah, I should have. I think I just went home

and crushed martinis. It was nice though. It was a fun Friday night just hanging out. Puking. Puking because of the hiccups. Because I don't really like puke like that from drinking.

The last time I puked from drinking was I guess the crate race for sure or the fucking tank race. Yeah. That's like you're so drunk it doesn't even feel bad. That was because I was just really full. It was because of a gut punch from my wife.

Yeah, damn. That's tough. That's a hilarious scene. That's a tough puke. Bad puke. It's a weak puke. Yeah. Bad puke. It's a weak puke. It was so weak. It's a weak, yeah, like you're a feeble man.

It didn't even come out strong. It was a hiccups. Yeah, hiccups. Did it get rid of the hiccups? No. What? It didn't get rid of the hiccups. I had to do it on my own.

How did you not get rid of the hiccups if you threw up? I was like hiccuping through them. Oh, that's awful. It was like a bubbling tar pit of like throw up and hiccups. It was like hiccuping through them. Oh, that's all. It was like a bubbling tar pit of throw up and hiccups. It was so disgusting. I can't believe she did that. It took her headphones off as if she wouldn't still be able to

hear us. I could still hear you when I did it. That was upsetting to me. How'd you get rid of the hiccups? I focused. I beat him like 45 seconds late. I could have done it on my own. It was like, I could have done this. It was like two hiccups in and she was like, I got it on my own. It was like, I could have done this. It was like two hiccups in, and she was like, I got this. Ah! Gut punch.

It was like, no, I could have did this. I could have did this on my own. I have a pretty good foolproof pyramid of deep breaths and hiccups, or deep breaths and swallowing that I do. She disappears into the city for two weeks. Yeah. Waiting to get you when you least expect it. She receded to the shadows. I didn't see her all the rest for two weeks. Yeah. Waiting to get you when you least expect it. She receded to the shadows.

Yeah. I didn't see her all the rest of the night. Fuck. It was pretty funny, though. Getting made to throw up that way. Yeah. And gut punched into the throw up. I bet you couldn't replicate it.

Like, if we tried right now to punch you and make you throw up, I bet it was like a one in a million spot. Like throwing an egg on a pipe. Did she get you a xiphoid? What? Oh, the xiphoid process? I haven't thought egg on a pipe. Did she get your xiphoid? What? Oh, the xiphoid process? I haven't thought about that in forever. You've never been hit in your xiphoid process?

We've learned about it. I don't know what it is, though. It's from like 11th grade biology, right? Right under your sternum? If you get hit in it, it can fuck you up real bad. Really? Your xiphoid process. Duo denim?

What is it? Maybe look it up, TJ. I don't know if that's exactly what it's called. Is that where DeMar Hamlin got hit? He got hit in the arm with a fucking up, TJ. I don't know if that's exactly what it's called. Is that where DeMar Hamlin got hit? He got hit in the arm with a fucking needle, brother. Is this a physical thing? Does it hang? No, it's like right where your rib cage.

Again, this is me. Oh, yeah, yeah. I once hit my buddy in it, and he was like, oh, you hit me in the xiphoid. It's a cartilaginous section at the lower end of the sternum, which is not attached to any ribs. You don't need it. Yeah, there it is, right at the bottom of your ribcage.

Oh, yeah. Your ribcage meets. I don't think I have one. It hurts real bad when you hit it. Real bad. She might have gotten your xiphoid. I think she might have gotten me right in my... Yeah, wait, go back up there.

It says pressure on the xiphoid. Pressure on the xiphoid pressure should be avoided when administering... Oh, okay. That's CPR. Yeah. It can fuck you up bad. You're hitting your xiphoid. I'm going to get mine removed.

Xiphodina. Tonsillectomus will do a two-for-one. Get your uvulae and your xiphoid. Oh, okay. Fuck yeah. Hey, guys have uvulaes? Do they? Little danglers?

Yeah. Oh, is that the thing in the back? Yeah. The punching bag in the back of your mouth? I don't know. Would you get rid of that? You don't need that. Why would you get rid of that?

You don't need that. Dude, I think that stops shit, right? Yeah. You don't need it. Yeah, that definitely regulates. What would you even do with that area? Doesn't that help you scream? You can sing a little better without it, I heard.

What? I think you don't need it. That is a weird thing. Why does the body have a fucking punching bag in the back of the mouth? What is the point of that thing? What does it do?

It's got to keep the garbage out. Most of the shit in your body you don't need. You can get rid of like 50%. You think so? Strip it down. Think of the uvula and think about it

and try to perceive what it's feeling and that's disgusting. Now you don't want it. Yeah, no. Why is it there though what's the point of it i didn't have one you got to put your tongue down you're blocking it uh stick it out stick your tongue you do have everyone i don't think you have one that's

hollow back there that's crazy you gotta go terrible at sticking your tongue out you're so good at doctors must hate you yeah i, I wanna know if I have one. I'm kinda curious. I've never seen someone not be able to stick their tongue out. And there was like a one millimeter gap between your lip and your tongue. Oh yeah, I have one. You can't tell, big cat? There it is, there it is, there it is.

There it is. He's got one. You got one. I just licked the mic by accident. Ew, gross. Yeah, he doesn't. There, gross. I, I, ha. Yeah, he doesn't. There it is. I mean, every day, someone's like, oh, I got this removed.

Yeah, you don't really need them. Oh, it helps prevent food and liquid from going up your nose when you swallow. Oh. I guess it covers your nose hole. Yeah, you might actually not have one. There it is. There it is. There it is. Ew, ew. Ew. There it is. Sometimes it just went up your nose.

What's that? It prevents food from going what? I guess the little, you know, your nose hole goes down into your mouth hole, I guess, somewhere. All connected. I guess it comes out behind the uvula, and the uvula is like a little defender being like, hey, food and drink, don't go up that way. Yeah, stop it. What if it did?

Probably shoves cocaine back down through. Yeah, yeah. You're going to love this. It's a dick stopper. Yeah, it's the dick. It's an everlasting dick stop it. What if it did? Probably shoves cocaine back down through. Yeah, yeah. You're going to love this. It's a dick stopper. Yeah, it's the dick. It's an everlasting dick stopper. Got my dick stopper removed. I actually got mine pierced back in college.

Brandon? It's way more pleasurable. What's the insurance call? Well, I'm getting an insurance quote. Insurance? Yeah, I got everything done except for that. And you didn't call, did you? Huh?

You never had the call. I ate my Chick-fil-A, but I also did everything here, and then I called the guy, and he's going to call me back, I hope. Oh, okay. Is that okay? Yeah, that's fine. That's fine. See, right now it's lunchtime back in Chicago or my hometown,

my new hometown. Did you guys see Donnie's apartment? I know. It looks awesome. You saw Chef Donnie? Chef Donnie, yeah. It looks like fucking the Big Daddy warehouse. Doesn't he have a crazy apartment here too?

Yeah. Is he alone or does he have roommates there? Hey, it wasn't small. Holy fuck. No, his old apartment was small. Holy shit. It really wasn't. Oh, really? It was actually massive. He had like a full living room and a kitchen and a dining room. Dude, this is insane. What's that machine?

Oh, look at that. Tasteful. It is the big... This is like the dream bachelor pad for any guy. I will say somebody... It looks like a place to die. Really? What? It looks like someone will die there.

Kill someone, maybe. Why do you think it looks like somewhere to die? Well, there's no windows. A place in which someone will die. No, it looks like someone would die in the 90s there. What are the earmarks of a place to die? It just looks like it. A lot of cement. I agree. Someone's going to hit their head. Something easy to hose

down. Yeah, someone's going to bump their head real hard. Those guys are tough. Yeah. They are, but you know how they get. A little bump the head. Oh, he's okay. Just put him to bed. Doesn't wake up. Doesn't wake up. Are you going to bury his body?

Are we going to bury it though because the floor is concrete? Shit. Doesn't wake up. Are you going to bury his body? Yeah. Are we going to bury it, though, because the floor is concrete? Shit. Now we're fucked. No, it was like someone, it was like Reservoir Dogs. It looks like someone would die in like this. I was kidding. Okay. Funny, bigger kidding.

Big Daddy does like, everyone just dreamed about living in an apartment like that. And that was, that would be like $10 million in New York City. I don't even think it exists. I don't think that style of apartment, that type of industrial multi-floor warehouse exists in New York.

No. Definitely not. I'd be sick if it did. Where could you find that? It'd be like Brooklyn. No, I'd say definitely not. Yeah, yeah, that's what I mean. Where would it even be?

I bet there's like some like warehouse type places in like Brooklyn. But with like a full staircase loft. I saw a loft one in Brooklyn where the bed hangs over. It's held up, and then there's a waterfall that comes out underneath the bed and splashes down to the next floor. I just saw it on Zillow Gone Wild or whatever.

You can't be trusted, though, because you said you bought a climbing wall. That's true. It was two feet tall. There's a leak in the ceiling. You can't trust. Someone had just spilled their water bottle at the nightstand. Beautiful. This is a waterfall.

There's like a lake. Fair enough. If you Google Brooklyn apartment with waterfall bed, you'll see. It's like pretty fancy. It was nice. Google it, TJ. Now I have to see if it lives up to the hype I just gave it. Living in like one of those, yeah, like a, what's the new fad?

The barn dominium or something? Yeah. Oh, yeah. It would be cool, but then you'd also just be living like you don't have rooms. Just one big room. Yeah, it's a lot of open air. Right. Yeah.

A lot of open air. A lot of open space. A lot of people down south. That way I could see my kids. They can get into hijinks, but then they can also see me, and I can't go away from them. I think you can sneaky hide better in a barn dominium. All right, wait.

What is this? I guess it's not that cool. Oh, shit. There actually is. Wait. Yeah, it comes out underneath the bed. It's on the bottom right. Well, where's the...

What the fuck? Yeah. Why would you want to... Where's it coming from? I don't know. Well? Yeah. Why would you want to... Where's the cover from? I don't know. Well, why the fuck would you want to live in that? I think my big trick would be to bring a guy back to my place, and then once we started, I'd hit the button and be like,

I'm so wet right now, and then... What the fuck? Waterfall would start going from underneath the bed. It's a cool apartment, but... Kind of a waste. Kind of a weird... I don't understand the functionality of any of this. That whole stupid-ass floor where the water's splashing.

That was like an Apple store. This is all the same apartment? This is pretty cool. It's just an Apple store. Yeah, that's awesome. Oh, wait. Click on the other loft units without the waterfall. That's just a good, solid apartment.

Eh, that one, nah. How much is that one, though, with the- Seven and a half. Jesus. A million? What's rent? Why does it say no potato shed? I would have to specify that.

It doesn't have a potato shed. What don't you understand? Is the assumption they would have a potato shed? No, there's no potato shed. It said no potato shed. Okay, but does every house have that? It says- Did you go over one, TJ?

It says potato shed or no potato shed? I mean, but how often do you guys like kick your sheets off your bed? What is that? What is this room? What the hell is this? That's underneath the bed. What room is that? That's the rest of a room in New York.

You put your feet in it and it's like water. Why wouldn't you just make that a room? Well, that's bed water right there that you put in your feet. Yeah. They sacrificed that whole room so a bed above it could have a waterfall to land on. What if you kick your comforter off the bed one night? Is that a bridge? Is that a bridge?

Yes. I like the bridge. Yeah, I'm about it, I think. Having a bridge in your apartment. That's a big room just to not have anything in it. What if the weather was not... I put a couple beach chairs down there. How do you climb up there?

It's a big iron thing. That's a staircase, that big ice thing. That's it. Oh, that's not a staircase, that big ice-off thing. Interesting. That's it. Oh, that's not? No, it is. He's right. Wait, it's a shower?

Staircase to bathroom? It's a shower. It's a shower. Oh, it is a shower. What the fuck? That's not enough for a shower. Metal toilet, like you're in jail?

No, that is a shower. Some really aged wood right there. I don't know how to explain it, but if you go back home with a guy and this is his apartment, that's a red flag. Right? I think it's a big green flag. I don't know how to explain it, but if you go back home with a guy and this is his apartment, that's a red flag.

Right? I think it's a big green flag. I don't think so. Oh, this guy has seven and a half million dollars to spend on a house? He doesn't even have a TV in his house? Something about it. I never watch. First who lives there never watches TV. You probably can't because the fucking waterfalls are making all the sound.

Can't sleep. The waterfall was being real noisy last night. I bet that's a very peaceful sleep, though. What a wild house. Wouldn't you want to pee all the time if you just heard waterfalls? Yeah, you bet. I would pee onto that thing constantly. 422 days on Zillow.

No one's buying that shit. Good rooftop. That's pretty sick. It's a great rooftop. What's the rent? Is there a rent option? Well, it's for sale. Yeah, but you could always rent those places.

You probably have to pay their mortgage. Which is $48,000 a month. Yeah, but you could always rent those places. You'd probably have to pay their mortgage. Built in 19... Which is $48,000 a month. That's a lot of money. That's a lot of cash. Bucket Sass, that's what you make on Patreon. You, don't you? Yeah, I've been putting up secret Yak episodes on Patreon for years.

Hell yeah. Where's Steven Chia? That's crazy. I don't know. He rolled up in here like two hours ago. Oh, they were doing an AP phys ed close. Got it. Who's the lady?

That's Kendall. Yikes. Everybody is failing the green line test in that one. Yeah. Also, Chia with his black socks, bad look. Why is he shoeless? Wait, is she failing it? Yeah, his shoe's off.

I mean, he likes to... Che gonna punch her? Is he about to punch her? It is. I think he's about to punch her. Not a single person in this photo is comfortable. You can tell PFT's doing the My Arms Around You, but I'm not touching you.

Oh, yeah. Che's about to strike her. PFT's doing the arms around you, but I'm not touching you. Oh, yeah. Shea's about to strike her. PFT's hand is one foot away from the back. Yeah. His right delt looks crazy. He's touching Stephen Shea. It is. You can see it.

Stephen Shea's got his hand inside her hair. Yeah. Scratching her scalp. Scalp massage, yeah. He's just smelling Smelling for the dead skin It kicks up Hey did Mincy get tickets tonight?

Oh man What did I miss? A lot with Mincy Give me some Nate was really Oh my god Okay so he came back I hate fucking

Yeah He hates people Yeah He hates Mincy Especially. He hates Mince. Especially Mince. Yeah, Mince would love to go to Game 2 of Stanley Cup Finals tonight. If anyone has the lead on tickets, just putting it out there in the universe, happy to pay. Just buy the tickets.

Happy to pay. I don't think this is as crazy of a tweet as people are making it. No, he's saying he wants free tickets. He wants free tickets. He's trying to make it look like he doesn't want free tickets. If also someone has tickets and they can't go, they'll be like, hey, give me like 200 bucks for tickets. I was just saying, anybody got free tickets? You could just go on Game Time right now and free tickets. He's trying to make it look like he doesn't want free tickets. If also someone has tickets and they can't go, they'll be like, hey, give me like $200 for free tickets. I was just saying, anybody got free tickets? You could just go on Game Time right now and buy tickets.

Yeah, but how much are they? $200. For game two of the Stanley Cup? It says he's willing to pay. Check right now. Look. You're right. That's dangling a little carrot out there hoping that somebody will say, oh.

I mean. That tweet is saying, hey, anybody got free tickets? Please give me free tickets. This dude embraces up. That's fine. Yeah, I'd love free tickets to something. I know. I would never go, but I would like to have them.

Even free tickets you wouldn't go? Well, I'm not there. If someone has free tickets to the Stanley Cup, let me know. How much are you selling your tickets to the Stanley Cup? Brandon? Not really a good market right now. Vegas is just a transient populace, and then Florida doesn't move the needle.

You know how things go. What is the date? Now. Here we go. The heiress tour in Soldier Field. That's crazy. That was something. Did you just buy tickets?

No, I mean, general admission is $57. Stanley Cup? But Mitzi's not a general admission kind of guy. Really? What? That's general admission. What does that mean? Same thing?

Yeah. It's more expensive to go to a Mets game. The fuck? Huh. $57 to get into the Stanley Cup? That's crazy. Where is it? Is that like what all those videos are?

People, they're waiting at the door for them to open the stadium, and then they sprint. Yeah, the Cowboys games. Yeah. Looks like you could get pretty good seats for $300. It's not even that bad. No. In game time, you know there's not going to be any extra fees.

No. Use code RONE. Mincy would like them. Yeah, so you missed Mincy came on the show on Thursday and he kind of admitted to being a coke dealer back in the day. Bricks. From bricks to bricks. Oh, yeah. I've seen him sell drugs. Yeah.

And then he did an interview with Norman Chad, who's a noted hater of Dave Portnoy specifically. But that interview was so fucking good that it's like, he'd get mad. He just got so much out of him. Yeah, Nate was... Nate took that personally. Because I quote you as like, oh no, who cares? It's funny that Minty just steps in it.

He cares. What did he say? What did he say? It was Minty saying... Go fuck yourself. Yeah, go fuck yourself. was like oh no like it's a like who cares like it's funny that mincy just steps in it he cares what did he say too is mincy saying yourself go fuck yourself but mincy was also saying this guy was i love that level of revulsion then he replied to multiple other people and he was like these kids have no idea how many wars we fought for this company some shit like that oh man kids and he just turned 40 something like that. Oh, man. He's kids, and he just turned 40. Something like that. But yeah, he was furious, which I respected. The real hater. Wish we could get the dog on.

Yeah, go fuck yourself. Nate hasn't been into work. What the hell's up with Nate? I'm got off for telling Mincy to fuck himself for playing tummy sticks with somebody who wishes none of us had jobs or paychecks. Take the shield. And he doesn't know what he's talking about. They don't get the wars we have fought. They think it's all fun and games.

Yeah. I mean, I just thought it was a funny thing. Like I didn't really care that he reviewed Norman Chad. It was a net net zero. Mincy breathing heavy breathing. Yeah. Breathing into the mic. I already breathing heavy. Breathing. Yeah, breathing into the mic. I already love it.

Oh, kind of missed you on check there. Played it cool. Norman, I was told to come over here. Shake your hand. I'm Ben Mintz. Nice to meet you. Yes, sir. You're good.

I always enjoy calling and commenting. Can we pause it for a second? Yeah, we need a moment-by-moment breakdown. Can we pull up Mincy's tweet of saying that Norman was could not contain his excitement. I think he was being sarcastic. That was sarcastic. Oh, it was?

It's hard to tell because he doesn't do sarcasm. Wait, that's the whole interview? 27 seconds? It looked like it was about to end. What's going to happen? That was an introduction.

We have the full video? And he said, he was like, I was told to come over. And then Norman Chad says nothing, and he reacts to the nothing as if there was like a... Fucking A, man. We fought all these wars. Or what?

You got to watch the end of it. You got to see the whole interaction, because it just, even the end of it, he's just like, pretty good, man. How are you? Norman Chad is a douche, but also. Also looks like he's like 80. Yeah. 80-year-old douchebag.

Yeah. That's funny. It was also like one of those wars that wasn't even a war because he just wrote an article being like, Barstool's the worst. Who was he with? I don't know. He used to do the World Series of Poker on ESPN. He's just like, Dave Portnoy's the worst.

Barstool's the worst. Okay, dude, your name is Norman Chad. Says it all, brother. Yeah. Fuck you. I just want to say hello. Like I said, I've always enjoyed following your commentary for years and happy to bring some new blood in here and work with you this summer.

Yeah, okay. If you blow any more smoke up my butt, I'll have to build a chimney in there. Thank you. Good read. Oh! Damn. That was the interview. Yeah, okay. If you blow any more smoke up my butt, I'll have to build a chimney in there. Thank you. Good read. Oh! Damn. That was the interview. Well, Missy handled

himself well. He did. Stayed positive. The tweens are back. Yeah. Ready to fucking dominate Brandon. KB, have you been

keeping up on this whole thing with the kid who jumped off the boat? I know what happened. The kid who died? Yeah. I know he was dared to jump in. What's the update?

He's dead? Sharks ate him, right? Sharks, yeah. He got eaten by sharks. That one kept me up a little bit. Yeah, that one was crazy. I was meant to text you about it because I assumed that you'd get into it. But did you watch the video?

Yeah. I watched the video like 30 times. Was him throwing meat in there? Wait, wait, wait. That's probably thought it was hilarious. Who was throwing meat in there? Wait, wait, wait, wait. That's probably thought it was hilarious. Who was throwing meat in there? You gotta see this. It's not funny.

He died. There's a video of him going in on the dare? Yeah, jumping into the water in the middle of the night. Yeah. The boat was moving or was it docked?

Yeah, the boat was moving. Oh, God. You added McDonald's burger and Sass is crying laughing. Did he get hurt on impact or did... Oh, he was alive. The boat just disappeared. They were like, hey, hold on to the... It's assumed he was

by sharks. There was a shark in the video, supposedly. It might be awake from the boat. But they also showed chum being thrown into those exact same waters and the way that sharks appear out of nowhere by the hundreds to fucking rip this chum up.

It's like, oh no. Where? Where was it? That tweet was, I think that tweet was unnecessary of the dude being like, likely what happened to the chum. I mean,

it shows why you shouldn't jump off a cruise ship. They were also throwing raw meat. Raw bloody meat. Who was throwing raw meat? Yeah, wait, were they really?

No, not, no. They were chumming. It's another video that they're chumming. No, that'd be a fucked up

It's two different videos. Okay. It's a video of the kid jumping off and then someone else posted another video from like, that was taken a while ago

being like, this is the same waters, it's shark infested waters. Where's this water, is that? It's in the Bahamas. Oh God. Where's this water?

Why are these kids going to the Bahamas for their graduation like school trail? Sounds like they're going to the Bahamas for their graduation school trail? Sounds like they're going to the Bahamas. That's where I went for my high school graduation. Really? Fuck, that's tragic.

It's pretty horrifying. You watched it 30 times. Well, because I wanted to see if I could see the sharks. But also, I will say, whoever recorded the video, I mean, what? How? I don't even know how it's possible to get a video with that shitty quality in this day and age. It was the middle of the video. I mean, what? How? I don't even know how it's possible to get a video with that shitty quality in this day and age. It was the middle of the night.

Yeah, but you couldn't see anything. Also, what was the plan once he jumped off a moving boat? It was really stupid. The whole thing was really dumb. Like, oh my God. Ugh. Like, shocking. You just want to put him in a bubble.

It was shocking how dumb it was. Fuck. There's another thing I got to teach my kids someday. Ever chop off of a cruise ship in the night there's another hammerhead head video from i think it's out is alabama have beaches yeah it's uh i think it's orange beach and the how fat it was there was a lot of people on the beach it was like right offshore and i didn't realize how fast they can it was like shocking to me how big it was and how fast it was moving and the guys who recorded was like just like two

minutes ago there's people standing right where the shark and it was and how fast it was moving. And the guys who were recording, it was just like two minutes ago. There's people standing right where the shark. I would have fucked it up. I wish a hammerhead would. Look how fast. I would fuck that shark up. Look how fast it goes. Why are they still standing there?

Well, they're in ankle deep water. I don't care. There's a couple other videos where all of a sudden they move. That's not even the one I saw. There's this dumb bitch doing it. Look how fast it goes, though. Holy shit. Look how dumb this woman is.

Hey, have you ever heard about bull sharks? Look at that. This shark is just lost. Bull sharks can swim knee deep, and they're, like, fast as shit. Where are those? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're still, I would still run away, right? From a bull shark?

From that. I guess I just, I didn't realize they could get so shallow. Why is it freaking out? It looks like it's, like, hurt or something. Chasing stingrays. Oh. There are stingrays. Oh. There are stingrays. There are stingrays, too?

I would have definitely ridden a muskie. That's where we almost got. Stingrays and sharks. See, this is why I'm excited for the Great Lakes. Yeah, there's no fuss, no muss, no crabs. What do they have up there, walleye? Yeah. Do those bite?

Muskie? Muskie or sheep. Muskie look like dinosaurs. You ever seen a big muskie? Muskies will- Muskies like dinosaurs. Muskies will eat a dog. Small dog. Big.

I want to catch one. Dude, they're so fucking big. A couple of muskie. They look like dinosaurs. My favorite YouTuber right now, Indy Yak Angler, catches muskie a lot. You got to get him. North Dakota Yak Angler. He just goes out. You got to get him. What's his name? Indy Yak? North Dakota Yak Angler. Indy.

He just goes out on a kayak and films his whole fishing trip. Steal our shit? Yak or? Kayak. Kayak. And me and you should do a fishing video together. I would love to do that. Yeah.

Go somewhere cool as hell. Let's do that. Go back to Iceland. Let's just go. You didn't catch any fish somewhere in there. Yeah, but I went too early and I know they have- All the outdoors want to do this fancy stuff. I want to go catch sharks or stingrays.

I want to go to the Bahamas. Just go to a lake in fucking Ohio. Give me a largemouth bass. Yes, thank you. If me and you just went fishing and we just sat in silence and videoed it, we'd get like 200,000 views. Pop off. I'm ready.

And then we would never do it again. I'm not going to Iceland. One time. Can we put it on the Boy Dad channel? That'd be a good idea. You guys should do that. Put it on Son of a Boy Dad, though. I'm not going to Iceland. One time. Can we put it on the Boy Dad channel? That'd be a good idea. Yeah. You guys should do that. Put it on Son of a Boy Dad, though.

I'll put part one on Son of a Boy Dad. Would you go to Ohio? Yeah. Come down to Mississippi with me to my pond. You're still not talking. Would I come to Ohio? Is that what you said, KB? Would you go to Ohio with Brandon just to do some fishing?

Yeah, I would go anywhere. You could just go to Jersey. Yeah. I'd rather go to Ohio. Or to Central Park. Why are we going to Ohio? I'm so good about Ohio. I came up with Ohio.

I kind of liked it. Go to Santa Colita. We could go to my pond in Mississippi, though. No. We're going to go to Mississippi. so good about Ohio. I came up with Ohio. I kind of liked it. Go to Santa Claus. We can go to my pond in Mississippi, though. No. We're going to go to Mississippi. We may as well just go to Iceland. No. Iceland's close, and it's cheap to get there.

It's closer than Mississippi. I don't think it's closer than Mississippi. Once you're getting on a two, three-hour plane. I'm going to Iceland. Let's go to Iceland. I'm going to Iceland. Is he gone yet? He's going. Yeah, no.

He hasn't. They're going to fuck him. Go to Iceland and then Paris. Why? They're going to fuck him. Go to Iceland and then Paris. Why? They're going to hate him. Oh, in Paris, they're going to hate him. They're going to hate him in both of those places. I don't know which one will be worse.

Paris. Paris, definitely. For sure. They hate all tourists there. And Americans. And he is the worst American. He is the worst American. He is our worst citizen.

He's the worst guy we could send over. He's absolutely going to get kicked out. Biden's going to have to pardon him. Bring home World of T-shirts. That would be so funny. We're going to have to trade another fucking arm. Doctor of Death. Our world of t-shirts is freed up.

I think they'll survive in Iceland because there's no people there. But dude, they don't like people. They don't like people in general. They don't like themselves out there, bro. They don't like people that talk.

Me and my friends, we go into a restaurant talking just normally. Oh, my God. And everyone turns and looks. Imagine him on the live stream. He's going to go in there with the fucking selfie stick out, live streaming with the fucking... Beat up and I sue. His legal vocabulary is growing rapidly. What kind of things?

He knows what he's doing. I can't. Things that I don't even know. His right to film in public type of shit? No, he wants to sue everyone who looks at him wrong. God dang it. By the way,

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Morgan & Morgan is going to have to be part of this. Bring them home. Bring our boy home. He's going to be coming up in debates. What is your plan for the world of t-shirt scandal? Yeah. How are you going to bring him home? Like when ASAP Rocky got caught in Sweden. Is Biden not debating?

Because he can't walk. Did you guys see that there's like fake Bidens? Fake Biden was golfing yesterday. Yes, dude. There's like multiple. And they had like a zoom in of a guy like a mask. He like scratched the back of his neck. You could see the mask like a bunch up.

And there's multiple earlobes. He is like sometimes Biden has attached and sometimes he has detached earlobes. Which Biden falls? Oh, I've seen the earlobe thing. Have you seen the mask on the neck? That's weird. No, I haven't. I haven't seen the mask on the neck? That's weird. No, I haven't. What are we talking about here?

Fake Bidens. Biden was out being spry yesterday on the golf course, just hitting the golf ball. Yeah, he was like Willy Wonka. Running around. People were shitting on his swing. His swing was not bad for an 80-year-old man. That's fake Biden? That's fake Biden. That's nuts. It's faux Biden.

He's probably really easy to fake. Yeah. He's like a generic. Very neutral face. And like it's all wrinkly and like weird different squint levels every time. He's also the most average. I mean, he's just an old white guy. Yeah.

Nothing really that special. You can fake that. No defining characteristics. Trump would be a tough one to fake. Is this fake Biden? That's fake Biden. So this is not Biden. Joe Biden.

I'm just saying. We think there's some fake Bidens out there. You're saying that's not him? I don't know about this one. How are they saying this is not him? You need to see neck Biden. You've got to see the neck. You start with the neck, then go to the earlobes,

and then you start making up your own decision. Then you figure out how many Bidens we got. I don't want to stir any conjure. I think that I'm getting silenced on Twitter right now. I just got this video over and over again. I don't see anything neck related. Oh, wow. See, there we go.

Oh, yeah. Got to get on the other sites then. Don't limit yourself to Twitter, my brother. I want to learn the truth right quick. Yeah, see what truth is saying. We should have talked about this when we had War Mode on. You would have loved that. I know. We had these dudes

Billy and Spud on. They got some wild theories. Are these the guys from Rough and Rowdy? No. Is John Rich wearing the Detroit sweatshirt I gave you? It looked like he was, yes. That was a gift to you, bro. I spent $85.

Who are you mad at between the two? Not Rich. I'm not mad at John Rich. I'm mad at... Oh, shit. I'm seeing the neck video. Did you re-gift it? No.

He must have taken it off my desk. It sucks because I was actually planning on wearing that soon. Fuck off. Are you seeing the neck thing? Send it to TJ. Just send it to TJ. Man, he's wearing a mask. That's nuts.

I'm pumped to see this. I never realized how horny Bill Clinton was. I mean... What? He's like the horniest president. How about Epstein's flight logs? He was getting his dick sucked on the... Yeah, yeah.

The specifics. He put a cigar in his... Yeah. I know. I guess I never read up on it. I watched cigar in it. Yeah, I know. I guess an island boy. I've never read up on it. I watched the impeachment series. It was pretty good.

Oh, my gosh, that's a mask. Holy cow. Oh, that's gross. It could also just be old. His skin is probably just falling off. His hair looks fake, too. I'd rather that be a mask than that it's his normal skin. Ah, that's not right.

I've seen old people's necks before. I don't think the back of the neck works like that, either. I think the back of the neck typically stays pretty tight. This is gross, but I have a slight waddle neck. Ew, this is gross. I don't know. waddle neck ew this is gross but like you i don't know if i like there's no way in hell just staying there like silly putty no way but they say the older you get like your skin like doesn't go back as quickly like is that a dehydration thing too if you do that and it stays means you're dehydrated yeah like see your skin spry because you're still young. Still a young buck. Mine takes a little second to go back.

But yeah, that was kind of gross. I will say the lady's voice made me believe that it's not fake. Yeah. Holy shit. He's got a mask on. It's actually JFK. What if it was JFK wearing a Joe Biden mask? Damn.

That would be awesome. He's got to prove he doesn't wear a mask. Yeah, he's got to take his face off. At all times. Every time he walks out in public, he has to go around the scene. See? No face mask today. Like in fucking...

What movie? Oh, in Austin Powers when he's like, that's not your mother, it's a man. Fucking punches the woman in the face and tries to yank

her wig off. Good for that woman, though. She probably, that probably took up her whole week. Oh, yeah. When she thought

she discovered that he was wearing a mask. The earlobes one was pretty crazy, but earlobes what Ron said that have some of his in some pictures, his earlobes are attached and other ones that are detached. How does that happen?

It's just a different guy, reportedly. Did you guys watch the new Sidney Sweeney movie? I heard it was really good. The one about... Was it Fast Forward? You're talking like Ben Shapiro. I heard it was fantastic. Fast forward.

Sheesh. What I did. Oh, my goodness. Replying. Got multiple bites. That person in the middle on the left. Not him. Is it?

Looks like a totally different guy. That's Archie Manning. We clearly attach. Clearly not. Any top left and bottom right are your best. He probably has plastic surgery, no? For your lobes? No, just for his face He's probably done a lot of plastic

He looks good, bottom left He looks damn good So this is just all day People are like just tracking his earlobes Again, good for these people That's a lot of Someone's gotta do it Keeps you busy

Right New earlobe just dropped. Imagine your house just being like, we got another picture. Zoom in of his earlobes. Look at it. Look at his earlobe. Someone explain this. Is that him in the top left?

I feel like that might be John McCain. In the middle doesn't look like him. That guy. That's just not him. The dude in the middle is just not him It's not him Hey what the fuck Like that can't be The guy on the top right looks kind of like Bush Senior

I don't know In the new Sidney Sweeney movie though They like Ugly-ify her on purpose Yeah And then It's like the direct transcript From some woman who was caught to be like a whistleblower.

So it started off as a reality winner. Yeah. Reality winner. Yeah, exactly. But the most unbelievable thing, like there's like a long scene where they're like talking about power lifting and Sydney Sweeney's like,

yeah, my max bench is one 85 and I got furious, dude, no fucking way. She's benching 185. In prison or before? Before, when she was... Oh, yeah, no.

Yeah, what the... Maybe on the Smith machine, yeah. Well, maybe on the Smith machine. She could lift that. No. No chance. And then Reality Winner, you see Reality Winner. She was actually yoked up.

Is this the movie where she fell in love, like actually started dating the guy in the rom-com? It's not a rom-com. It's like a... It's like an Edward Snowden type. Yeah, she's like a whistleblower. Was it good? No, I didn't like it.

Really? Yeah, kind of. It's a slog. I watched Blackberry. I watched it too last night. That's good. What is hell? It also made me feel old because it's like...

That's how old Blackberry is? Oh, I just remember it. So I remember my first job wanting a Blackberry. Everyone senior at the place had a Blackberry, and finally I got one. I was like, yeah, I made it. Dude, I didn't know... So it's not legal to sell Blackberries

in the United States anymore. Really? It wouldn't give up the data from when they got investigated by the SEC. Rick Breaker was the best. Yes. Incredible game. I didn't even have a Blackberry.

Yeah, people loved it. I probably fooled around on somebody else's. Snake on the Nokia phone. Oh, yeah. Snake. What was so addicting about it? It just never ends. You go through all the levels,

and then it just goes back to level one, but faster. Also, when you don't have the luxury of choice, everything seems better. Right, yeah. It's also just great playing a game on a work phone where you're like, yeah, I'm working. True. You just look like you're...

I would just sit there and just play it all day. Yeah. No, that's not Brick Breaker. It's some other shit. But it's similar, right? That looks addictive to me, though. It's similar, but this isn't what the actual Brick Breaker was. This is fake what was the other

what was like the original smartphone before the iPhone that came out was it an Amazon or not an Amazon an Android maybe Android X I had a I didn't get a cell phone until I was 18

I had a flip phone that was like a, I think it was the Razor. Motorola Razor. Yeah, the Razor. Remember the Razor? I'm talking about a specific smartphone, though. When you first could scroll internet on your phone. Because one of my, I remember in college, my first roommate got one, and it changed how we all interacted. Or he was just so zoned in on his phone

and we just weren't used to that. We're like, get the fuck out of your phone. Why are you in your phone all the time? And then everybody one by one just got sucked into their shit on the couch. It's crazy. We used to have conversations, man. Sass, you wouldn't know nothing about that.

As he's looking at his phone, look at him. Look at him. No, I wanted to do a fact check on myself to make sure I read that right. About the BlackBerry? Being illegal. They refused to hand over the data, and so authorities have decided to ban BlackBerry services rather than continue to allow an uncontrolled and unmonitored flow of electronic information within their borders. It was a good phone.

It was a power phone. You were just like working hard But dude once iPhone came out There was legitimately nothing they could have done I remember I had A Blackberry and Someone in my office got an iPhone and I was like Why would I get that

Like I got everything I needed in Blackberry And like six months later I was like yeah I think I want this iPhone thing It has everything And they're like but but the buttons click. Yeah. It's like no one gives a fuck about a clicking button. It's satisfying. No, it's not.

A couple people held on to theirs. I have a friend who had her Blackberry up until a couple years ago. Just wouldn't give it up. You know what's more satisfying than a click? Watching full-color videos of pornography. Oh, man. Watching actual games on your phone. Nothing compares to that.

There's nothing as satisfying as coming. It did suck having a biopic be like, I remember each piece of this. Yes, I was there. I remember having it being like, this is awesome. Then it falling apart. Yeah, Che, how was your – was it for content, or you guys just went?

Both. I'll probably blog it later. But you didn't video it? There were no phones allowed when it was happening, but we took a lot of pictures, so I'll put those in the blog. So that's not a comment. You're going to write some prose about it? Yeah, it was fun.

It was a very weird experience. People were like – PFT was a little bit late, so I got. It was a very weird experience. People were like, PFT was a little bit late, so I got there and reserved a spot for them. We were the only two VIPs. It's a room of like 20 people. And everyone that was in there was on level like 20.

People flew in from Canada and Wisconsin to go to this thing. Why? What was it? I mean, it was a Peloton ride. But you could just like go to your home? Yeah.

I don't necessarily understand it, but it was experience. What level are you? I mean, I'm okay at it. There's no like levels like that. But you said... You said there was level 20.

Or like what level was I on of excitement? No. No. Who was in level 20, me? Everybody was in level 20. Or like what level was I on of excitement? No. Wait, wait, wait. Who was in level 20, me? Everybody was in level 20. Oh, sorry. I meant like excitement level.

Who uses 20 as that? It's like out of 10. Stunning. You thought we would assume that meant excitement level? The way you said it sounded like that was a stock. Sounded like you were doing the Peloton level. Oh, no, no, no. Sorry, sorry.

Did you have it the whole time? No, of course not. Who the fuck thought he was talking about excitement level? Sorry, yeah, excitement level. Excitement level 20. I still wouldn't know what you meant if you said it. That makes it sound like it's out of 100. Excitement level 20 sounds bad.

We thought you were going to cost us Lance Armstrong. I thought you had great bikers around you. Oh, it's excitement. Level 20 excitement. No, I tried to win the class and I burned myself out real quick. Oh, I never saw that one coming. First place through seven and a half minutes. Doesn't count for anything.

Some guy after was like, hey, I saw you just burn up the leaderboard. And what'd you finish? Third. How many minutes was it? 30. It was a lot. Oh, you went out in seven and a half quick, though. A third is respectable. A third out of what? 20 people.

I don't know how many people were in the room. You're like 20? Oh, good. They were all level 20. I don't know. Maybe you finished like sixth or seventh. Pretty good. It was...

Third's impressive. I still don't understand why... Like, what was the... There was no content. No, that was nuts. I mean, I'll blog it. It just like, what was the, there was no content. No, that was nuts. I mean, I'll blog it. It just went to the gym in the middle of the day. Yeah, it was weird.

She was here a few weeks ago, huh? That's where we. Oh, that's where you made the connection? Yeah, and there's classes, I guess, like early. I don't know how early, maybe like 6 on Sunday morning. And so there's like Sunday or Monday classes that she could do like the instructor we met Kendall and uh she asked which one and PFT was like oh I can't do Sundays like I go to church um and she goes oh seriously like I was looking for like a church run he was

like no that was actually just an excuse not to work out really early on a Sunday morning pot and a lie and with a God-fearing woman, too. A lie means a little bit more to her. Probably took his excitement down to, what, a 15? Yeah, at least. Maybe 12. How are you not the most excited guy in the room? I've never experienced the room.

You're the horniest. Were you horny to be there? No comment on that. No, we know you were. You were 25 out of 10 in horny. She is one of my favorite instructors. What's your favorite part of her? Her mind.

Oh, okay. That's not. Jay, when you go to like a Bucks game. What about her pussy? Yeah, that old vagina. It's the highest your excitement level can get. So I tweeted this. One of the best moments of my life, peak childhood, was today, 24 years ago.

Larry Johnson made a four-point play. He's my favorite player, like my idol. And I was uncontrollably crying when it happened. And that's really the only time that's ever happened. That's the peak of your childhood? Yep. Was it for a while? Somebody else made a shot? He's my hero. Can we watch ever happened that's the peak of your childhood? yep was it for a while? somebody else made a shot?

he's my hero can we watch it? Larry Johnson you remember the shot oh I remember it I just want to watch it for the people at home it's a great moment do the LJ for me? you're crying?

yeah bad like so happy was it like a playoff game? playoff game Knicks were down by three He makes a three pointer And gets fouled

I thought they were down by four No they were down by three So he hits the free throw To go ahead by one It is a very sick play You need the volume The crowd goes Absolutely apeshit

And this is Stephen Jay crying Are you going to cry right now? No I mean it's I'm so far removed from it Would you cry? And this is Stephen Jay crying. Are you going to cry right now? No, I mean, I'm so far removed from it. Would you cry? I mean, I used to watch like 82 games a year, and this was my guy. And he came through in the biggest moment. It was incredible. And then they went on to win the ship that year.

They didn't. They lost to the Spurs. Oh. They got swept. Yeah. Money ball. It wasn't even a real season. No. It was a lockout year.

50 games? Yeah, it was a lockout year. Great moment, though. All time. But that's probably peak excitement level, but now you're probably going to Bucs game, be on the sideline.

So what is it, though? We need the numbers. Yeah, we need the number. You just took that question. We're asking you for a simple number. Jerry Johnson. I'm trying to figure out the levels. Give us some data. Yeah, I'm probably like a 20 out of 10.

At the game, on the sideline, right as the game is about to start. Let's bring it back down to 10 out of 10. We'll get you to 25 out of 10. Oh, like the other night when my bet hit for that brief moment where you think it's dead. What was that at? That was high.

What was it? 20, 25. Yeah, that's right in that range. Are you trying not to get pissed? No, it's pretty good. And what could really elevate it? But it's so fleeting. It's just a brief moment.

Like what about the Giovanni Bernard to Tom Brady? It's like coming. Just always coming. You're like Arnold at the gym. I don't know. I come in the gym. I come at home. I don't think I was like a 20 out of 10 for that.

The luckiest man in the world. Just always coming. I think I was just very nervous to answer your question, Ron. So, yes, probably sports moments can really get you there. Bucs-Super Bowl? I don't know. For, like, a moment? Yeah, I mean, yeah.

Get ready for the game. I was actually thinking about this this morning. Both Super Bowls the Bucs have won. It's been just absolute blowouts. So it's hard to be like, mmm, that's the moment. Maybe the first score. Yeah, for sure. Maybe a defensive score when the Bucs really locked it in that first time.

Was it Derek Brooks' score? I'm sure Jackson. Yes. I'm trying to get to level 20. I don't think I've been at a 20 in a while. I don't know if I've attained 20 in my life. You peak at like a 7. 20's tough to get to.

You never get a 20 out of 10? People refuse to use the 1 to 10 scale as it should be. Some things are very low. Some things are 2s. And then a 10 out of 10 is the best.

No one uses it as a... Like, Dave's pizza review scale is a lie. Like, a bad pizza's like a 6. Yeah, people need to start

using lower scores. Pick a game of the year. Yeah, 10. Out of? 10. Five? 10 out of 10. How come Philadelphia doesn't reduce their fractions on the highway?

Good question. What the hell do you mean? What does that mean? Why does it say the zoo is like two-eighths of a mile away? What is up with that? They do that? Oh, that's cool. Where the hell did you see that? Two-eighths of a mile away? What is up with that? They do that? Oh, that's cool. Where the hell did you see that?

Two-eighths of a mile? Yeah, I have a photo. It's insane. They don't reduce fractions. Is that true? Yes. I need more than one example of it, though. Just say that they blanket.

I'd just like to see the one example. Very fun fact. This is crazy. But on mile markers on the road, I've seen them do like a.1,.2,.3. I was like, you guys don't reduce your fraction. That's a reduction. It actually has a fraction on the sign, two eights? Yes.

I have a photo. Visually, as me driving, two eights helps me know, bloop, it's real tiny. One fourth, I'm like like this could be forever no what you don't know it so I think we're learning people from Philadelphia do not know how to reduce

their fractions it makes sense two tenths that's crazy yeah yeah yeah two tenths what two tenths is crazy

no no no but one fifth is weird two tenths exactly tenth I get okay no one fifth if it was.2

that's the right two tenths they do but they do everything out of ten. Like, everything is a.1,.2. It's like the stops on the highway or, like, the mile markers on the highway

is, like, mile 351.2. That's very helpful to me. I can picture... Would that be great if it was, like, next... Wait, if I see this... It would have been weird. If I see a fraction, it better be the next one, right? No, two-tenths to me.

I can picture a mile as ten, and is letting me know it's right here. Show me a city that reduces the fraction. Right. Well, they use points. I don't think I've ever even thought of this. Like one-fifth? No one's taken two-tenths to one-fifth. Show me one city that has a one-fifth in their sign.

I wouldn't know how far that is. Two-eighths would have been in there. So if it was two miles away, it'd be 20-tenths? Why didn't they move the sign up? Level 20 tenths? Why didn't they move the sign up? Level 20. Yeah. Why didn't they round the sign out? Do you have any other?

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turn down a package of Omaha steaks turn down they're going to be excited as well best gift possible what is Father's Day? This week or next week? I think it's US Open, which is great. It always is. That is awesome that they do that.

Just be like, what do I want for Father's Day? I want to watch the last round. Just lay there and watch golf. Who determines what day a holiday is? It's always like a certain amount away from God's birthday. God makes these decisions. Understandable.

It's like football when they're like, oh, yeah, 2032, Texas is going to play Notre Dame. God's like, all right, 2032, Father's Day is going to be on June 14th. He makes the schedule. Understandable. If you could change one thing about the calendar and invent around the calendar, what would it be? All right. Super Bowl, President's Day, weekend would be the easy answer. For me, I would make February two days.

That's good. Put all those days in the fall. Damn, my boy. September and October. Oh, shit. It's not short enough as it is, big cat. I would make there be a summertime sport that wasn't baseball. I don't know if that makes sense,

but I would move one of NBA, NFL, college basketball, or college football to the summertime. I agree. I would also make Christmas and New Year's always on a Wednesday. Yeah. Then you get the whole two weeks off. I like that. And Valentine's Day, always a Thursday, Friday, or Saturday.

Because I feel like there's a zhuzh in the air that day, and there's always a little extra chance of something fun. But not on a Monday. Not on a Tuesday. I don't know that I would change calendar at all. You think it's perfect? I don't know if it's perfect, but there's nothing that sticks out to me. I think the year should start on the Monday after Labor Day.

Ooh. Wait, why? That's when summer starts. Because January 1st is in the middle of winter. It's in the middle of the school year. If college basketball was in the summer? I'm trying to think what you could do, what you could put in the summer. Basketball still doesn't feel right in the summer.

Yeah, but you could put college basketball in the summer because then the kids would all have to be in school. Who gives a fuck about the kids? It's true. Fuck them kids. Fuck them kids. Fuck them kids. They're like...

They're also not kids. They're 18 to 22. They're there for business. They're there for basketball. Like, let them play basketball in the summer. They could take off in the fucking wintertime. Oh, the NIL is a thing. I'm pro death threats.

Yeah. Fuck them kids. They're making enough money. Then you can get death threat. Yeah. Like, if somebody's, like, making no money, yeah, I'm not going to threaten their life. I make no money.

I get death threats all the time. Well, you suck. Run. When would March Madness be then? Tournament. It needs to be alliterative. Up until training camp. End of August? Yeah.

It would just have to be August. August then. Yeah. August Madness? August is good with me. That'd be kind of cool, and then it's over and then football season starts like the next week it would rule it's inside bro you can go inside for it

what are we gonna do in March what the fuck are we gonna do in March you gotta save it for the shitty weather NBA regular season torny you're ruining March NBA regular season torny

that is the lamest thing ever I hate that they're doing that but wouldn't it be nice to have a fucking a nice ass thing to gamble on something that you know what they need to do they nice to have a fucking nice ass thing to gamble on? Something to chew on? You know what they need to do?

They need to make the fucking World Cup and the Olympics every two years rotating. That's all they gotta do. Give us a World Cup or an Olympics every summer. I want the Winter Olympics. Summer Olympics. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What? Yeah, thelympics is so much better i actually think i tried to make this argument for winter olympics before on an old ksu radio and i realized as you know when sometimes you make an argument and as it's coming out of your mouth you realize how stupid you sound there are no sports in the winter olympics lucky they're all variations they don't let and they don't let pros play anymore. It's news to me. What was your favorite moments from the last Winter Olympics? Right.

When the U.S. beat Russia. That was when they let pros play. And that was a long ass. Well, not in 1980, but the Oshie game. I was joking. I was making a joke about it. In the Summer Olympics, do you guys like the week? The other one did rule. Do you guys like the week that is swimming and diving or the week that is track and field?

Track and field. Both rule. I like watching the dive. It's good that swimming comes first. Getting to track. If track came first, we wouldn't watch swimming. What are the best track events? I love long jump. I love anything that gets...

100 meter dash. Mile run is sick. I just watched Usain Bolt's 100 meter at the World Championships this morning. What's the mile record now? Like 350? Oh my God. Lower than that.

Cleverman's did his last one. Right. Last couple laps. The track's got different bounces though. That's a big thing. That's true. Where you run it. We need another fast guy. We are due for another fast guy,

yeah. Especially someone faster than Usain Bolt. We need to be progressing this shit. What if he's just the fastest? That's what it's at right now. His 9.58's like, might as well be 56 straight. That is so fucking fast. Yeah, it is.

It's infuriating. Who's the fastest man alive right now? Is it Usain Bolt? No, it's... Who's the number one? Not anymore. I don't even know who it is. How old is Usain Bolt?

40? He's probably pretty old. No, not 40, but he's probably in his late 30s, though. Who is he always going against from the U.S.? Tyson Gay. But also someone else, though. In 2015, he almost lost to... Someone with a thick chest.

A thick chest. Maybe that was Tyson Gay. That Norwegian dude's nice. I don't know what he runs. Always got track guys? No, they... He's one of the best. Asafa Powell used to be nice.

I think it's hurdles. Oh, I love hurdles, too. That's a good No. He's one of the best. Estafa Powell used to be nice. I think it's hurdles. Oh, I love hurdles too. That's a good one. That's way harder. Have you ever tried it? Yeah, hurdles are so much harder than this. Chop puts fun. Hurdles are like pure athleticism.

When you're a kid, you're like, this will be fun to try. And then you won. I'm supposed to do that again right now. Race walking, they got rid of that. Y'all ever thrown a javelin? Yeah, after jab in high school. Looks fun. Never thrown one.

It was... You show a clip of race walking? That shit ruled. It was fun, but it was like everyone that threw a jab was just kids that wanted a sport to do that didn't want to be athletic. Well, through jab, you call it jab. Through jab. I think I would have crushed it race walking.

Discus is stupid as fuck. Discus is awesome. It's so dumb. If you get a good discus throw, I did discus too. Not I didn't practice. I didn't compete in it. You have to tuck it in. I don't like the way they have to hold it.

Oh, it's awesome. When you get a good throw and it goes far, it feels good. Shot put rules. I feel like every year a ref gets hit with the javelin. The other one to handle. My understanding is shot put is just pure power. Well, yeah. Discus is like technique more.

I don't know. Yeah, it's like the movement and your body torqued. Javelin is what? A little bit of both. Like technique and strength. Those sports I struggle with because like Patrick Mahomes would win. Josh Allen would win.

I don't think. Yeah, Josh Allen would win. I don't think so. Ja would win I don't think so Javelin I mean I'm sure If he trained hard enough He could But I don't think

First try He would not come close to winning It's like our old Handball debate You meet Josh Allen In my homes Playing handball They would fucking dominate

Right now Or if they played Their whole life Right now They could probably dominate I disagree with that There's no way. I think that technique plays in.

Then you look at when Ocho Cinco started to play soccer. You'd be like, of course he's going to be the best soccer player. That's a different sport. Soccer's played worldwide. It's the race walker. I would crush. Lines are blurred here.

You've got to blow the whistle right now. That girl on the train every day. That girl on the right is cheating. Think she's jumping too much? She's fully cheating. Both feet always have to be on the ground, right? That looks exhausting. At least one foot.

That isn't walking. Both feet on the ground would just be sliding. Kate. This would have been my... That's true. I could have paused that like 10 times when she was in midair. If you're behind, you have to fight the urge to run, right? Oh, look at that.

I love it. It looks like a bunch of people that have to poop. It does. Oh, that's good. Oh, that's good. They got to shit in between their ass cheeks. Yeah, yeah. Back to the debate road.

Soccer is like a worldwide sport where so many people play handball. What's the pool of handball players? I just think technique and skill in these specific sports is like, can beat just brute strength. Maybe they'd have to train for six months. Yeah, I agree.

I mean, they've been training their entire lives. I think if they, if they train for six months, I don't think Josh Allen would fucking dominate. If they've been training

their entire life to do it, there's no way that, because I'm sure a strong dude who's probably stronger than Josh Allen or Patrick Mahomes has tried and failed.

Isn't it just the wall? You're hitting a ball at a wall? No, the handball is like. They're not like. That's like street handball. They're on TikTok trying to get people horny. Yeah, that's true. Josh Allen would be able to do that. You're telling me he can't throw a ball.

I'm saying jab. Really fast in a small area. That's literally his job. This is lacrosse with no sticks. Oh, that was beautiful. They load up with spider attacks. That's a beautiful handball. Yeah.

They're like a baseball player. No, the ball is like coated in spider attack. Oh, shit. Look at the crowd. Like, these guys obviously are good athletes. I'm just saying. Oh, that's a good goalie. We could dominate if we wanted to.

Can we pull up some Wii? Now it's a Wii? Yeah,'m just saying. Oh, that's a good goalie. We could dominate if we wanted to. Do we have like a U.S. fist off? Now it's a we? Yeah, no, America. Oh. Can we pull up some Jav highlights? It's definitely we.

That's we. Jav doesn't have good highlights. Come on. They never have a good camera on the Jav. No, they don't. How about the kid

who almost went over the line? I think Barstool posted it. He like went to the javelin and he like... Or how about Emmanuel Acho when he tweeted that they should like weed as bad in the Olympics because what happens if someone to the javelin and he like... Or how about Emmanuel Acho when he tweeted that they should weed as bad in the Olympics

because what happens if someone throws a javelin and hits someone? Well, that does happen every year. And it's probably because they're on the weed. That, to me... There's no way that Josh Allen could just go in and do that. I don't know how you're saying this. Yeah, I don't know how you're saying this.

What are you talking about? It's a very different throw. I understand it's a different throw, but his arm strength and skill and strength, like, yes, he'd have to train a couple weeks. He could be an elite javelin thrower if he wanted to be. You know what they couldn't do is the pole vault. I feel like you have to

train your whole life for that. You also have to be crazy. To be in the Olympics, you have to train your whole life. Oh yeah, the pole vault's pretty ridiculous. Except for some of the... What about Byung-Yung Kim? Isn't he the one that, like,

would throw the ball over, like, from the pitcher's mound over center field after every game? I thought Byung-Yung Kim used to do it all the time for the... You don't remember

when Byung-Yung... He was a submariner, though. I don't know how his arm style would... Submarine Javer would be funny. Can I say Javer? I just think that Javelin takes, obviously, some skill,

but it's arm strength. And if you got the most arm strength from any of the major sports... I agree. I think Pyongyang Kim could have fucking... Michael Vick would have been better. Yeah. That commercial?

Dude, I don't think... Is it crazy for me to say that? I don't think Josh Allen and Patrick Mahomes are like these like insanely strong dudes. Yes, that's crazy.

No, they're just in good shape. Josh Allen's just a little bit throwers though. They have arm strength. So you could say

any pitcher in the MLB could throw. That's true. Probably, yeah. That's right, Byung-hyun Kim is like throw it

the farthest. Why does arm strength make this Byung-hyun Kim thing happen? I'm sure those guys can throw a football pretty fucking far. Not as far as Josh

Allen. Why? With this argument, why? It's a different throw. That's my point. I think Josh Allen's probably got a stronger arm than them. That's a different throw, too. Josh Allen wouldn't make it out of the Texas district. That's crazy. Right now, no.

You're insane. He doesn't have the technique down. He doesn't have the experience. Give him a week of technique. Because I would say there's probably a good amount of people who can throw the ball just as far as Josh Allen, who are not in the NFL or even play football. Throw God. Throw God can throw the ball as far as Josh Allen. It's not Bernie.

Throw God. I forgot about Throw God. He's goaded. For football, maybe I'm wrong, but I feel like it's more of like an accuracy and like a smartness type thing. The farthest javelin throw is like 324 feet. How far is that? 100 yards.

That's a football field. Almost 110 yards. And Josh, how many yards? A football, like, pretty much the distance of a football field. Yeah, but a football is not the same. A football travels less aerodynamically than a javelin. He's a submarine then. Why'd he yell at it?

You don't know where it went. Yeah, I mean, you could just record me doing the same thing and put it up on YouTube. Holy fuck. Out of Yankee Stadium. Oh, shit. Fucking far. That's Byung-hyun Kim. That's only from where he was.

That's like... I don't know. Maybe I'm wrong. That's far. Last time we had an argument similar to this is when I said that rowers were the most athletic people in the world. Maybe I'm wrong. I'm not trying to diss Javelin,

but the amount of people that throw the Javelin in the world is very small. I'm on your side now. I agree with you. If there's that small, the best athletes don't throw javelin. It's not the best of the best athletes in the world. If you just took better athletes, I bet you

they would do very well. No, I don't agree with you anymore. It's hard. Where did I get you and then lose you? I don't know. At some point, though, you'd think one of these quarterbacks would have picked up a javelin in their career. We should be able to ask the quarterback,

have you ever thrown a javelin? Yeah. And get a point of reference here. It was like another good one. You know, enough quarterback. Ask Jay Cutler about his javelin throw. Well, this was actually how it all started with Jay Cutler when we interviewed him saying that he would dominate handball.

Quarterback throwing javelin. Remember in like the, was it the 80s, Brandon, when they had like... Why me? Because you're the person that we'll be able to reference when Wayne Gretzky was racing against like Pele and McEnroe or Bjorn Bork or something like that. The Battle of the Stars, yeah.

Yeah, the Battle of the Stars. Superstars, yeah. I feel like that would be the type of event where you might have seen somebody throwing a javelin. It's always like speed skaters or stuff winning that. Well, you know, I mean, Wayne Gretzky dusted those dudes. Did he? In his?

In the 100-meter dash. Ron Say running. That's the funniest thing you've ever seen. Who? Ron Say was an outf the funniest thing you've ever seen. Who? Ron Say was an outfielder for the Dodgers. CEY. And him running in the Battle of the Superstars. He finishes last by like 40 yards, and his legs don't move.

That's hilarious. Some of those dudes just never had to sprint like that. Deacon Jones couldn't sprint. Deacon Jones for the – I watched them all on cheap seats. Shout-out to the Sklar brothers. Terrific show. Shout-out to the Sklar brothers. Whatific show. Shout out to the Sklar brothers. What are those dudes doing now?

You like that show, Che? Because you made a face. Yeah, I used to like that show. I love that show. That was like ESPN 2 very late at night, right? Yeah. Yeah. And it was like an I love the 80s ass show.

I love cheap seats. Weren't those dudes on I love the 80s? The Sklar brothers? They might have been. I think so. Patrick Ramsey was a state champion in the javelin throw. He wasn't even a good quarterback. We don't know how much he trained in louisiana sounds like he should have pursued javelin instead of football well he's a first round pick what if javelin was his first love and he became a quarterback off of that we don't know you guys still talk about who could

throw a javelin for oh yeah okay cool i mean i think it would take them some time to learn how to do it, but I just... You couldn't have walked it over there. Remember old Bradstock? He threw things really far. He's doing... Yeah, health scare. He's doing well now. Liar.

What? He was a liar. He lied about all of his feats. What do you mean? He was a cheater and a liar. What are you talking about, KB? He proved that. He was a cheater and a liar. All of his records are

from cheating. And lying? I don't think he even knows that. Don't act shocked. I thought we liked him. We do. But he was still a liar and a cheater. My favorite people. Reed finished third in the javelin throw. He was a safety, was still a liar and a cheater. Oh. My favorite people. Reed finished third in the javelin throw.

Well, he was a safety, though. Yeah. That's my choice. His personal best throw was 60 meters. And that other dude threw what? Nine. He's not a quarterback. He's not a quarterback.

Eh. That's true. Good point. I don't know, man. I would love to find out, though. You just need to put some quarterbacks to work here. I'd love to see it. Yeah, I'd like to see quarterbacks and other athletes doing it.

Why don't you ask Josh Allen? Of course we can do it. Aren't you friends with Josh Allen? Or the best NBA player, the most athletic NBA player is doing the high jump. Would they be competitive? Yes. Probably. Technique is so much of it, though.

I think that a guy— I understand. You'd have to practice a little but like in terms of raw skills, do you think that a high jumper's raw... LeBron should be able to dust anyone in that. Right. Is raw skills more athletic? I think LeBron's too...

I would like to know, would LeBron win like a state title in Texas? In high jump? Like a high school? Jackson. Yeah. Not Texas. I think so.

I think another state though. All the kids that are super good at high jump are all skinny. They're scrawny dudes. They're very lanky. How fast do you think I could get a javelin in my hand? If I went out here and wanted to go throw a javelin, do you think I'd have a javelin in two hours? Three days.

No, New York City has track and field clubs. Where would I get a javelin? You'd struggle. High school? Would we buy a javelin online? Yeah. They're probably pretty expensive, though. What, Manhattan College, I bet, has them. You could go up to the Did we buy a javelin online? Yeah. They're probably pretty expensive, though. Manhattan College, I bet, has them.

You could go up to the Bronx, grab a javelin. Or you could probably go over to the Fashion Institute over here. They got javelins. For fashion, yeah. All right, so this guy who's playing basketball, he just signed to play basketball at TCU, won the Texas State High Jump. But you don't know if he's a pure basketball player. True. He might be a track guy that's also playing. Bill Russell was an Olympic- State high jump. But you don't know if he's a pure basketball player. True.

He might be a track guy that's also... Bill Russell was an Olympic-level high jumper. Oh, was he? That's weird. Olympic-level? Yeah. What about... It's an article.

I don't know if it's actually fact. Damn. What about Derek White? Who's the dude on the Bulls? I'm sorry. Oh, you're talking about the guy from Memphis? Ice Thomas? No, no. He could jump out of the... The guy from Memphis. No, no. He's currently on the Bulls? I'm sorry. Oh, you're talking about the guy from Memphis? Ice Thomas? No, no.

He could jump out of those. The guy from Memphis. No, no. He's currently on the Bulls. He won a dunk contest. He went to... Labine. No, no.

He went to... Nice. Eric Jones? Eric Jones. Eric Jones Jr.? Eric Jones Jr., yeah. He might be making that up, too. Because he won a dunk contest.

He could jump high, so... Who has the highest vertical dunk in nba anthony anthony uh there was a guy from memphis that that had a 51 inch vertical michael wilson i think and he tried to break the guinness world record of dunking on a 12 or 13 foot when when bill russell in 1956 when bill russell graduated uh high school or maybe it was college, he was the seventh best high jumper in the world. Why are we watching Tyreek Hill win something? Good Lord. That's pretty nuts.

Damn. So you're telling me if he didn't keep practicing? Huh. Sounds like he pursued basketball because he knew it was easier. I'm kind of lost in the sauce on this argument right now. I don't even know what I think. What's right, what's wrong. We watched a couple high jump fails just for, what is it?

What is it? Pole vault? Oh, pole vault. The pole breaks? Do they still do pole vaults in high school? Yes. Oh, I don't know if they still do. They took it out when I was in high school.

Yeah, we did the Mount Rushmore of Olympic events that you think you could do well in tanks at pole vaulting. Really? Dude, people like die pole vaulting. Yeah. Like 40 feet off the ground. And your technique has to be more perfect in that than like anything. I feel like that mat doesn't really, it only covers one possible way that could go wrong.

You bend it properly, it could take you up and you not go forward. There's videos of them snapping. Oh, not for me. And it goes up their ass. Yeah. I've seen a lot of it going up their ass. Happens all the time. I remember as a kid finding a good stick and being like, I can do it.

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and within about 17 minutes, there were High Noon hard seltzers at my door. Go to your local convenience store or your liquor store. Visit highnoonspears.com to find it near you. All right, I got one. Terry Bradshaw set the record in America when he was in high school for a javelin throw, 245 feet. Damn. National record for throwing the javelin. Of all time?

You're gaining me. And it was, let's see, it was about 1965. I'm close. A couple more. He was about 15 meters away from the world record at that time. Yeah, I'm very close. And that's Terry Bradshaw, who was a high schooler. It sounds like he was a damn fool for not sticking to Jav.

Yeah, all those Super Bowl rings. Dude, people don't know Jav. They pay well. What's the technique? Do you still remember? Can you show us? How could I forget? I think it's very similar to throwing a football.

No, it's more of like an over the shoulder, more of like a launch. It's like a catapult. Do you hold it, arm straight? Do you straight arm it? Yeah, show us. Is there a catapult. Do you hold it, arm straight? Do you straight arm it? You like... Yeah, show us. Is there a stick in here? You have a pen.

You start, and you're like... You could run up, or you could start with it like this. Were you a runner, or were you a... It seemed like a football throw. Yeah, completely different. That's just like a... That's day one shit.

High school Terry Bradshaw, I feel like, helps my kids. Also, I threw javelin for like maybe three weeks and I was the worst on the team, so I probably shouldn't be the one to... You guys know as much as I do. Stick up for javelin. Jav Twitter is going to be so pissed at you for that. We're probably in the comments,

sass is jab form is fucking terrible. It's no offense to javelin throwers. We're just saying there's got to be... If you took the best athletes in the world and you made them all do one thing... Then what about soccer? Soccer's different because soccer is a sport that kids start playing when they're like

two years old and like the ability to like it's you can't be like oh this guy's a great athlete like he's a great football player he can just play soccer that's so much more skill involved but what about like the kicker it's just javelin just throw things average nfl kicker has to make five times the amount or a hundred times the amount that the average soccer player makes. So why wouldn't decently good soccer players just become kickers? I think a lot of them try. And they fail?

Harry Kane just said he's trying to do that, I think. Yeah. And I think that there's a decent amount of punters that come from Australian rules football because it's like same type of thing. They could just boom the fuck out of the ball. Interesting. Probably a half dozen Australian punters in the league though.

Interesting. Fascinating. What the fuck do I know? Did we do high noon? Yeah. Sure did, brother. Should we do some Sporkle? Should we spin the wheel?

Maybe do one Sporkle? Why stop ourselves at one? We haven't done Sporkle since you... Did we do it last week at all? No, I don't think so. We did one where KB guessed what the... Oh, yeah, that was bad. That was a low point for the show. Got them all immediately.

Okay, so they were all so obvious. Good. Yeah, let's do one sparkle One grab bag Yeah one grab bag We've hit an hour and a half Garrett sent me a list of a bunch of good ones Oh nice One that you actually looked at

One that I You'll know if I do I'm surprised Brandon didn't do that Just like memorize a sporkle He is a known cheater It's an Allen move It is an Allen move You see Benzema, the guy from...

Yes, the French striker. $600 million? Yeah, $680 million or something. Ooh. To go to Saudi Arabia and pay no income tax? I don't think they have income tax. Jesus. What type of homes do these European guys have?

Crazy nice. In Saudi Arabia? City center, even like the British or nice. In Saudi Arabia? City center. Even like the British or French. I think at the city center it's like a little bit smaller. Still like really nice. Mbappe probably lives in Paris. Like everybody was outside of Messi's house in Argentina,

and it was like kind of in a neighborhood. It's not like he was like palatially set off from everybody like in L.A. They're like in the hills, and they have a big property. Who's the super, super famous guy? Messi? Ronaldo. His wife is very lovely. They have five kids.

Beckham? Ronaldo? Beckham? No. Probably all of them. He's the most famous. He's got the biggest following of anyone. Messi.

Ronaldo. I don't know. I guess one of those guys. But his wife just had a documentary on Netflix It was like a five part series And they owned like a mega mansion But they also owned like a bunch of the neighborhood too I think

Her name was Georgina Yes So it's Ronaldo's life Ronaldo okay Let's do wives of soccer players As a sporkle Oh are you smarter than a college student I like this

It's tough to read though So are we going around Okay It's nothing Alright should I go first I ain't seeing that shit Say the question before you answer it. You want to switch?

You can read it to me. Which Avian Peanuts character shares their name with the famed 1969 music festival? Woodstock. Oh, yeah. Wait, we're going, right? I guess KB's going first. All right, KB, you got it. Woodstock.

What punctuation mark is made of two periods one above the other? Are you going? Oh, we're going down the line like this? Wait, fuck. Well, you're out if you get it wrong. Oh, you can pick, right? Yeah, you can do whatever you want. All right, okay, I'm going to pick.

All right, read yours out before you say it. All right, what Colorado-based beer lends its name to the stadium where the Rockies play course? Kate, what are you saying, Kate? Oh, sorry. Crown of Thorns for Jesus. Read it out so people know. What was the headpiece Jesus got put on him at the very end of the crucifixion?

Yeah, read out your question. Crown of Thorns is my answer. Sass? Wait, type it in. Where's Brandon? Oh, you did it. Crown of thorns? Was I wrong?

Sal has not typed. Oh. Oh, sorry. I was trying to figure it out. Sorry. Oh, crown of thorns is my answer. Sass? No, you already did it.

Sass, go ahead. Have them ready to go. Well, I don't really know any of them, so... What? I'll do... What type of grid puzzle? Nope. What children's playground game is played with a grid of numbered spaces that one jumps into as an object is retrieved?

No idea. Okay. I'll go with what punctuation mark is made of two periods, one above the other? Is that a colon? Nailed it. One L. Okay. What Army post in Kentucky is home to the Gold Reserves of the United States?

Fort Knox. Fort Knox. Is it me? Oh, no. The equestrian sport is polo. Read the whole thing, though. Can't. The People of the Podcast. What 2003 Will Ferrell-Vince Vaughn vehicle features the creation of the AEQ fraternity at Harrison University?

Old school. What surname of a Stalin-era foreign minister is combined with the word cocktail to make a throwable incendiary device? Molotov. Nice. Fuck, I was going to do that. Shit. I know the bottom one, but I don't... Come on, Sass. Come on, Sass.

City is the capital. Come on, Sass. I'm trying to read them. I can't focus. You're supposed to get ready before. Fuck. What Swedish auto... Five.

...makes trucks... Four. Stop. Stop. Three. I can't... They're like paragraphs long. I have to read them.

The guy who loves Sporkle the most constantly ruins it. The chemicals used to knock out people on a rag has the chemical formula CHC3. Five. Four. I forget it, I know it though Alright, for that same one, chloroform What chemicals used to knock out people on a rag? Are you mad at me? I think just F-O-R-M

Chloroform Maybe pH, I don't know Nah Here we go Alright, you're up There's one about grid puzzles, it's crossword Chlor... Chlor... Maybe pH, I don't know. Nah. There you go. All right, you're up. There's one about grid puzzles. It's crossword. Nice.

Look at the rest. What city, the capital of Sweden, hosted the 1912 and portion of the 1956 Olympics at Stockholm? Kate? Oh, is it me? Shit, sorry. kate oh it's me shit sorry uh uh in greek mythology blah blah blah are are what monster that can turn fuck um do we already say cotton for the fiber that grows in bowls that has to have seeds removed? I'm going to say cotton. Nice. Nice. Okay. Phew. Okay, so it's me because Sass is out.

Which of Goldfinger's henchmen uses his name, uses his throwable bowler against James Bond? That's Oddjob. Nice. The Texas mascot is Longhorn Yeah, that's good Let's go with What Swedish tennis star won five consecutive Wimbledon And six consecutive French Open tournaments?

Is that Boris Becker? Boris, no I fucked up Boris Becker's German, I believe Oh my god Boris no I fucked up Boris Beckham's German I believe oh my god what special administrative region of China was reverted back in

1977 for the United Kingdom Hong Kong damn it okay what 2005 biographical movie about an influential group of skateboarders starred Heath Ledger and Emile Hirsch, Lords of Dogtown? Yeah.

Go ahead, KB. The children's game where you jump in squares is straight up hopscotch. It says you have to retrieve a ball or something. That's how you play hopscotch, yeah. Hopscotch. Fuck. Go ahead, Kate. I hate saying this.

Is it Tonto? Yeah. The Lone Ranger? Yeah, it is. That's not PC. I know. Rone? I would say Bjorn Borg for your... Oh!

Instead of Boris Becker. Borg. It's fucking Borg. Damn it. I made it longer than Sasso, so that's cool. Barely. No, two rounds. Barely. Two rounds. KB? longer than sas though so that's cool barely well no two rounds barely two rounds

kb there's a world capital on here for carl yeah bottom right is world capital kb thank god porto novo Kate? I mean, I'm just done. What elementary particle is the smallest quantum beam of light? Oh, what was the beam? The smallest beam that can size Star Trek torpedoes. The neutron beam. No, the fucking, I don't know this is painful what's above four

what swedish auto giant there's a swedish auto giant okay looking down can what tv show has been on the air i can't read the rest what tv show has been on the air since 1963 follows the travails of a time lord it's been on the air since 1963 yeah follows the travails of a time lord. It's been on the air since 1963? Yeah. Follows the travails of a time lord? Five. I'm done. Four.

Done. All right, Roan versus KB, our two smartest guys. Plasma Gun. I think that which name is missing from this literary set? I could say this wrong, but I think it's, so the other ones are Athos and Eramis but I think it's... So the other ones are Athos and Aramis. I think it's Parthos. Ooh.

The Three Musketeers. P-A... Maybe Arthos. P-A-R-T-H-O-S. Ooh. Maybe I'm wrong. Damn. KB for the win.

Is the Swedish auto giant Saab. S-A-A-B. No! We're still going. Okay, is the name of the Old Testament book that shares the name with the book by Toni Morrison, is it Genesis? No. I played this one with the boys back there pretty recently.

Oh, so you've done this? Now I remember the ones I missed. How did you not get sobbed? I thought that's what I put last time. He's coming back up. You can just start naming Old Testament books. Oh, Hydra. In Greek mythology, Steno. Sorry, bro, it's not your turn, though. Oh, he could use Hydra. In Greek mythology, Steno.

Sorry, bro, it's not your turn, though. Oh, he could use Hydra now. KB for the win. Is the Scottish body of water Loch Ness? Oh. That makes sense. No. Is the bee...

Oh, I already cheated. Is the B No way I already cheated Is the B Boron Yes Good job That was the left Wrong for the win That sucked Let's play again

Do you have another one I have to leave in five minutes One last one Just want to see Sasquatch first again You love playing and you stink. College student again? Yeah. Oh, let's go. Sas, would you like to

start? No, I didn't win. Okay. Rowan, would you like to start? In what country is the automaker BMW located? Germany. I played this. Okay.

Before being picked up by the Miami Heat, as a free agent, LeBron James played for what NBA team? The Cleveland Cavaliers. I can't see the questions. Why don't you just play? That's more embarrassing when I miss. I can't read them. That's the biggest issue.

What's the question? Apple. Nice. Give me the question. No, because then you guys are taking so long. It just helps the listener. It's good for the listener. Go ahead, Roan.

What is the last name of the reality television celebrities Chris, Khloe, Kim, and Kourtney, who all spell their names with a K, Kardashian? What man was the leader of Italy during World War II? Mussolini. Mussolini. What is the largest state in the U.S. and area? Alaska. It's two s's oh sorry alaska sass no we're still typing in alaska oh okay

hmm read I gotta read Come on, Sass There's a lot out here Homo sapiens Ooh Sapiens with a Z He said Z Homo sapiens Alright,. Sapiens with a Z. He said Z. Homo sapiens.

All right, homo sapiens. Fuck you guys. Where are you getting a cup of coffee if your size choices are Venti, Grande, and Tall? Starbucks. Ooh. Where'd you pull that one from? Which U.S. president is the only one to be elected to more than two terms? He was elected four consecutive times.

That's FDR. This novel details the life of Scarlett O'Hara during the Civil War. Gone with the Wind. Nice. After Russia, what is the largest country in the world in area? It's a tough one. Are you asking us? Get back in, KB.

Come on. Come on, Sass. You got this. You got this. Is that going in? Trash? Yeah. Oh.

Canada. Oh, yes! What does the A in DNA stand for? Acid. What? It's a 1982 album thriller. Eventually led to seven different songs being released as singles, including P.U.I.T. in the title track.

Name the artist who made this album, Michael Jackson. That's cool. They. and the title track. Name the artist who made this album, Michael Jackson. That's cool. They're giving you little hints. They had the M already in the type box. Who wrote The Raven, Telltale Heart, Annabelle Lee. I knew what Michael Jackson wrote. Grell and Poe. Come on, Sass.

Middle, middle, middle. I only got a couple left, Sass. The singer, the female singer. Come on, Sass. I don't even know who sings that song, though. I'm not going to guess because I don't want to be wrong. It's Rogers in a Hammerstein movie, Musical Chronicles, The Life of Von Trapp. Nope, definitely.

Oh, Sound of Music? It's P.O.E. P.O.E. Yeah, you got it. Come on, Roan Is it not Edgar Allen? Oh, maybe it's not It might not be

Oh, there it is I did sound of music In the United States How many senators are in the U.S. Senate? 100. The invention credited to the Egyptians is so named because it was originally made out of papyrus plant. Name it paper. Oh, my God.

Which country is made up of 31 states including Chihuahua and Tabasco, Mexico? Yeah. Hmm. Sassy. Only one U.S. state borders exactly one other U.S. state. Name this state that only borders New Hampshire to its southwest. Southwest.

Oof. No. Only borders New Hampshire. Oof. What is it? Five. Four. Why do I get a countdown, but no one else gets a countdown?

Uh, fuck. I mean, there's only really two options. Five. Four. I guess I'll go with Maine. Yeah! Ooh. Bad.

The author L. Frank Baum created a character named Dorothy who appeared in a series of books that took place in what fantasy land led by a wizard and a princess? Oz. I have to go. I have to go. I have a meeting. I'm coming. I'm coming.

Rihanna. Female singer is the youngest woman to have ten number one hits. Name this singer, SOS and Umbrella. Go ahead. Oh, shit. Me? Yeah. Oh, my bad. Sorry. Oh, fuck, though. hits the name of the singer SOS and umbrella go ahead oh shit me yeah oh my bad sorry uh oh fuck that whole thing's taken god I'm sorry

I don't know ocean to make another word that is a type of boat that can be used in the ocean canoe yeah I have to text and say i'm gonna be late playing fucking whatever the hell this is um i think i'm out i think i'm out too i guess i'll guess uh i'll go with... Angry Birds is a popular game produced by Rovio Mobile.

What country is... I don't know. China? I'm definitely not China, though. Yeah, I'm out. Same question. Brazil. Understandable. Is it Brazil? No, I think it's... Sorry, bro.

Is it Brazil? Is it Sweden? Is it not Asian? No. It's Finland. Lupine is... I was going to say horse. Oh, it's Finland.

I don't know what the hell Lupine is. No, so that means everyone's back in. Sass, you're back in. How many different Pokemon are there in Generation 1 of the game? Let's go with eight. I think Lupine is Wolf. Nice. I'm out.

Kate? Miami. Oh, you guys already got that basketball one, of course. Lupine. Lup course. Lupine. Lupine. Did anybody already get that? Yeah, Rowan just did that. Oh, shit.

What was it? Oh, a wolf. Yeah. My God. Did anybody get the bird one yet? Yeah. Bird game? Spain.

Pizarro. What's a new world? The conqueror of what new world empire? Mexico. No, no. Mexico's already been done. What's a new world empire? Fuck. America.

Nope. Nope. Okay, I'm done. Rowan, KB? I think it's over. The name Pizarro sounds familiar to me. Alright, let's see the answers. Six. 151 for Pokemon. Zinc for the Pokemon.

151. I guessed eight. I don't know. Linguistics in the Incan Empire. I never would have guessed those. All right, good time. All right, guys. Wrap it up. All right, let's wrap it the fuck up.

Let's wrap it up. See you all tomorrow. We'll see you guys all tomorrow. Bye-bye. Outro Music The Yankees are the Yak. It's the Yak.