The Yak - TJ's Dad Tries to Chug as Many Root Beers as Possible | The Yak 8-24-23

Episode Date: August 24, 2023

Him HitchingsYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, DJ, pull that up. Hello. Hey, Brandon. Hey. You look goofy as hell. Well, I got my face painted for the case race tomorrow. We're not doing that.

We are face painting. Yak presented by Roback. Roback.com. Promo code Yak. 20% off your first purchase. Q-Zip, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, all of it. Roback.com. Promo code Yak.

Hello, it's Thursday. I was worried about it being too plain, and I think it is a little too plain. You think your David Bowie face paint is too plain? Well, this whole entire side of the face is not painted. Yeah, but the entire side of your head is. Let's see it. We'll turn your head. Okay. Can you not turn your neck?

No, no. The other side too, right? Yeah. She's got both sides of your head. I think you're enjoying your lips being painted. Ugly woman. I don't mind that. You have the lips of someone who would ask for a branch manager.

I feel right. I feel pretty good. I didn't, but I don't mind that. You have the lips of someone who would ask for a branch manager. I feel right. I feel pretty good. But I didn't know. So my other teammates are going to go in there with a plan? Yeah. They're going to go in there with a plan. Yeah. You guys came up with a theme after I sat down and got Ziggy Stardust.

No, you got the great white duke. We could change plans. Who are you? I thought you were Elton John. I'm David Bowie. Oh, David Bowie. My bad. By the way, Tim Hitchens is here. Who are you? I thought you were Elton John. I'm David Bowie. Oh, David Bowie. My bad. By the way, Tim Hitchings is here.

What's up? We should have said that. Tim Hitchings, the legend himself, not a loser. Fucking winner. We'll find out. That'll be decided, yeah. We decided. So, Ronan Seth, did you guys hear this story?

Do you know the 20-Rupee or something? I heard it off air, but I don't think I got the full telling of it. But there was a record broken, from my understanding. Accidental record broken. So Tim Hitchings just tweeted at me randomly one day. He said, ask TJ about the time I drank 20-root beers at Cheesecake Factory. And we asked TJ, and TJ said that it wasn't even like Tim Hitchings was going for a record or talked about.

He just realized it was free refills and he drank 20 root beers at Cheesecake. When did you start keeping count though? There was nothing random about that tweet. I was replying to you. You were worried about your diet and whether you should drink root beer. Oh yes. That wasn't random. You're right.

Corrected. How's the diet going? Well look at me. I look fucking like a Greek god. That's beautiful. Come on. Coming in hot, Tim. I judge my diet. If I can get one person saying I look good a day, that means I'm on the right path. Has anybody said it today? That's one of your lighter black shirts.

Erica said it. She was like, you look good. You're melting away. I have a question, though. Brandon, why did you do David Bowie? You didn't talk to us at all. We'll ask questions, but yes, start drinking. You've seen David Bowie in concert. You're old enough, right?

Okay, Tim, just relax. Secondly, I sat down. Y'all didn't have a plan for me, and I said to the face painter, hey, what do you feel like painting? She said David Bowie. She said Ziggy Stardust. Oh. That face painter thinks you're bisexual.

Remember the dude whose dad, who he found out his dad fucked David Bowie on? Yeah, yeah. That was an all-time post. She recognized me from the cat's face last time, and she knew. She didn't recognize you from that. She just met you. She knew that I had an open mind and would let her do whatever she wanted. What's that? This is the right one, right? I can just drink 20 of these? Yeah, wait. She knew that I had an open mind and would let her do whatever she wanted. What's that?

This is the right one, right? I can just drink 20 of these? Yeah, wait, what is that? Those are little guys. So you're going to drink 20 of these while we yak? 20 of these or 20 of these? 20 of those. Oh, yeah.

It doesn't matter. I said that you don't have to drink 12 ounces in every, because it's true to form, cheesecake. It's not like they're pouring a 12-ounce can in every glass because there's ice. I don't even know if I could do 20 root beer barrels of the candy. Are you nervous? Of course I'm nervous. How many do you- Look at my hand shaking right now.

Yeah. All right, see, that's good. That counts as one, in my opinion. I agree. You're letting me off the hook. No, you could go a little more, yeah. I'm supposed to be drinking these all day at Stu's. Now I've got to drink it in like an hour and a half.

Oh, it's less than that. No, that's not 45 minutes. This is a short shot. I've got to drink it in like an hour and a half. Oh, it's less than that. No, that's not 45 minutes. This is a short shot. I've got to be out of here by 5, brother. Get to drinking. I can't believe you're going no straw. Why? I agree with Hitchcock.

Ice is going to be banging against your face. What's the straw going to do? Just trying to get the fizz out of it. Okay. Think about it. Do you think that you could do this? I just did. What year was it that you first did this?

This was probably about 10 years ago. TJ and I were doing Babe Ruth baseball. I used to prep all the fields and after a hot day's work of baseball, we went to cheesecake. When in the night did you realize a record was going to happen?

I don't think that was a record. You went for it. You just put down 12 and say, I'm going to get this one. I was very thirsty. You ever had root beer when you were thirsty? It's delicious. It's a good test. So you could just drink, yeah.

Are you thirsty now? I haven't had anything but Stella Cold Brew coffee since 9 a.m. Love it. Company man. Company man. Company man. Good man. Take notes, Sasquatch. I actually drink that all the time.

What should I get my face painted as? Whatever you want, brother. Pizza. I thought you guys were doing pizza, hot dog, hamburger. Brandon's David Bowie. I think that's funny. David Bowie has had all three. You find that Reddit post, TJ, the guy who posted it, he was like, look at this, my dad with David Bowie in the 70s.

And everyone was like, your dad fucked David Bowie, dude. He was just like, no, that's not true. It's a badge of honor, honestly. Yeah. That's not a bad. Sure. Those subreddits are just like, I think it's old school cool is what it's called. It's kids bragging how hot their parents were.

Yeah. Very strange. Yes, very strange. Your parents were probably hot as fuck, though. Nick's straight dad? I just talked to your dad. He was looking good today. He was looking good on Friday when I saw him.

Oh, yeah, look at that. My dad with David Bowie on vacation in Greece, 1988. Sharing a bicycle. Yeah, buddy. Oh, my God. Hopefully he was fucking David Bowie. Yeah, he definitely was. But not getting fucked by,

I think, is mine. Oh. My dad was excited to meet you guys at Rough and Rowdy. I've met him multiple times. Again, he was excited to meet you guys again. Okay. I met Devlin for the first time, he was excited to meet you guys again. Okay.

I met Devlin for the first time. He had a good-looking friend with him. Yeah, John. Yeah, very tanned. Yeah. Yeah, they just got back. Mykonos. I still can.

Riding around on their motorcycle. They're at Lindsay Lowe and Beach and Dork. TJ, I think you can update the counter, buddy. Yeah, he's had one. One. One down. One can or one? You had one. One down. One can or one? He had one.

One glass. I'm counting glasses because that's what Cheesecake would do. All right. So it's refills. Have you ever seen the glasses in Cheesecake? They're not that big, I don't think. Oh, they're big. Well, why didn't you go to Cheesecake and get one of the glasses to bring you in?

I'm not that stupid. Think how big that glass is. I'd never get through 20 of those. Well, you're the one that said you did it in the first place. Oh, I think that counts as one. A glass with ice counts as one. He's hoping for a smaller glass. Are you doubting?

I'm not doubting the man at all. I just want him to live up to his potential. Going for the record. I want him to live up to the legend that I've heard about. So, Sass, what are you getting? I don't know. Should I do pizza? Yeah.

Or what's another idea? What's something else you could get? Let's go biblical. Biblical? Yeah. What what's another idea? What's something else you could get? Let's go biblical. Biblical? Yeah. What about Joshua, Judges, and Ruth? That wouldn't be bad. What would Ruth be?

A woman. Babe. A harlot. You know that Bob Barker. You don't think Ruth was a harlot? No, I'm confusing her with Mary Magdalene. You know Bob Barker was alive for 477 of Babe Ruth's home runs? What?

Just to make sure. Bob Barker has not died. No. Okay, yeah. Yeah, but Babe Ruth is not going to hit any more home runs. That's also true. Your opinion. Yeah. I can see that.

What's he, 95? He's 99. Zass, get the crucifix down your face. 99 years ago. Hell no. That'd be so sick. 1824. That's half Babe Ruth's career.

Zass, get that guy from the end of Inglourious Bastards. Yeah. 99 years ago. Hell no. That'd be so sick. 1824. That's half Babe Ruth's career. Zass, get that guy from the end of Inglourious Bastards. Yeah. Babe Ruth did 476 home runs. Bob Barker was born. Bob Barker, what a G. What a fucking legend. Him and Victor Newman, probably the biggest one-two legend punch in the history of TV.

Who the fuck is Victor Newman? Who's Victor Newman? What? I have no idea who Victor Newman is, thus making this nowhere close to the best one-two punch that ever existed. Hold on, hold on. Time. Everybody! Oh, no. He's getting...

Okay. I see what he's doing. Oh, shit. Oh, Kelly's coming, too. You know who Victor Newman is? No! She doesn't know who Victor Newman is. Who the fuck is Victor Newman? You know who Victor Newman is? Even Tim doesn't know who Victor Newman is. Nobody in here knows Victor Newman.

This is crazy. He's the best one-two-punch in television. He's one of the coolest motherfuckers in the history of the world. He's Victor Newman from Young and the Restless. Nobody? Why the fuck would Ebony know that? Why would any of us know that? Black people love Victor Newman. I ain't gonna lie. My mom knew who it was.

I don't know who that nigga is. And take that blue shit off your lips. I'm not gonna take it off. Alright, Kelly's coming in too. Hold on. She flamed you. Kelly, do you know who Victor Newman is? From Young and the Restless? No, fuck no. You guys are not. TJ's mom knows. You didn't stay home from school and watch Price is Right and Young and the Restless?

I watched Price is Right and Chips. Why Chips? I was on after Price is Right. I'm not crazy. Victor Newman is a very famous person in this. No? I don't know. Bob Barker is significantly larger.

Of course he is. They're not a one-two punch. There were a one-two punch in Mississippi where I had Bob Barker at 10 and Victor Newman at 11. And this is not crazy. I'm not the only person that feels like this. Okay. Kelly, President Kelly, President-elect? Yes, I am.

She's been inaugurated? No, not yet. I'm sure the insurrection is going to get in the way of that. Oh, no. We'll see. So I wanted Kelly to come in because I do miss being around Kelly every day because I have a lot of questions for her. True.

There's a lot of stuff going on in the Taylor Swift world you haven't been able to. Yeah, so I've kept a running tally of questions that you guys can also chime in on that I wanted to ask Kelly when I saw her again. Love it. Should I just fire it off? This goes back like a month and a half. I'm curious, on the scale of one to ten, how rude are these questions? Not that rude.

What are they all about? What did you think of the Barbie movie? Oh, no, that actually is the first question. Did you see in the Barbie movie the controversial map that doesn't respect, what was it, Taiwan maybe? Oh. Any comments on that? Oh, I did see something like that. So do you disavow?

Well, I mean, it's a fake map, and none of it was real. Oh, so those people don't exist? What about Israel? Find that, TJ, the fake map that she... Yeah, to be honest, I didn't look into that. I didn't look into whatever that was, because it was a fake map. That's convenient. People were saying, like, oh, they left whatever off the map.

I think they said they left the Philippines off the map. I was like, okay, but the map is fake, and half the world isn't on the map anyway. So why are the Philippines mad when half of the other world is not on it either? I don't know. The Philippines were supposed to be on the map, but they weren't on the map. I don't know if they were supposed to be on the map, though. That's a lot of people. Favorite movie of all time.

Can I tell you something that made me really happy over the weekend? Did you see Erica saw the movie? Made a grid post about it. Loved it so much. Wow. Yeah, so watch your mouth. Whoa! What the fuck? Not you, not you. I just was looking over at much. Wow. Yeah, so watch your mouth. Oh, what the fuck?

Not you, not you. I just was looking over at you. Speaking of impunity, you're good. We got to get you in a convertible in Dallas. Look at this. World map. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, Philippines. So they don't exist.

Oh, wait, that's the map they're mad about? No, no, no, it's China. I didn't realize that was the map. Yes, that's what I'm saying. But it also says what? I can't read that far. It says world map. It says world map.

No, no, but what did the tweet say? Asia? Oh, I don't know. Featuring Beijing. China responds to Barbie movie featuring map that supports Beijing territory claims ruled illegal. That's exactly what that map says. Wow. Right, so it's something.

I'd be more mad about that mid-ass Barbie. Do you disavow? No, I don't disavow. I stand by that map. That ugly chick's in the way. What about the violence in the Barbie movies? The violence in the Barbie movies? Well, I only saw one video of violence and

I thought that... I don't know what happened there. I wish I knew more about it because sometimes you gotta sometimes you gotta hit somebody in the face but doesn't have to be more like in the Barbie movie okay and I mean I think it just happened to happen at the Barbie movie you also said Taylor Swift smart girls listen to her yeah that means anyone who doesn't

listen to Taylor Swift is dumb so we're not empowering women no I wouldn't say that I don't think that was an exclusionary tweet I think that was just saying if you're smart, it's likely that you listen to Taylor Swift. If you're dumb, you can also listen to Taylor Swift. I didn't say dumb girls can't. Do you consider yourself smart? Yes.

So what about this tweet? Ain't wrong. What about this tweet on August 25th, 2013? Not watching the VMAs, but it sounds like Miley was rolling face. T Swift is sucking dick as usual, and JT continues to be perfect. This tweet came up during the election. I told you I had some questions.

No, no, no, you're right. This tweet came up during the elections. Is this Mike Frances' Diet Coke, by the way? Yeah, you can drink it. That's amazing. No, I'm not going to drink it. It's Kate's Diet Coke. It's crazy.

Where is she? I don't know. This tweet came up during the elections. Tommy showed it to me, didn't use it during the campaigns as like a smear thing. I have no idea what that tweet is about. I'm dead serious. I have no idea. Never was there a time where I didn't like Taylor Swift, especially in 2013.

And I love Miley Cyrus. He's Swift is sucking dick as usual. Wow. That doesn't make any sense. You say that? Is that a real tweet? Is that something that she really does? It's a real tweet.

It's a real tweet. But I had no explanation for it. I have no idea. The only thing I noticed, that is the year I graduated college and that was at night and I might have just been drunk and being stupid.

Oh, you know what they say, drunk words are sober thoughts. Wait a minute. The sucking dick doesn't, that's not a bad thing. I don't know anything about it. But as usual implies that that's all she does. No, to be fair,

usually if I'm using that, no, no, no. If I'm using that expression in real life, I haven't used that expression in a long time. But that just means like, oh, she sucks dick, meaning like she sucks. Like you suck so bad, you suck dick. So not literally. Not literally. I could be like, oh, like Dan, like, you know, you suck dick. Right.

The follow up question would be, do you think Taylor Swift is having so many relationship problems because she stopped sucking dick? That could happen. You know what is a new thing that people have been saying about Swifties? And I hate this narrative, but it is kind of funny. They say that Swifty girls give blowjobs with teeth. Oh, that's mean. Which is a mean thing to say. It's a mean thing to say.

So I guess, I don't know. Brandon, what's your, you look confused. It just seems like that's a lot of people to generalize about sucking dick with teeth. But I could actually see it. I know. It kind of fits. That's what I'm saying. I don't really know where that comes from.

Stadium's full of people that suck dick with teeth. Yeah. Hardy B-Fix did not use teeth. No, my God. No, no. Just slop it up. What does that mean? Like if you, I know that you can't.

Tim's laughing. I know you can't be using teeth during blowjobs, but like, what does, uh, I don't know what kind of girl, what does it look like for a girl to be like, you know what I mean? Like what girl makes a girl look like that? Don't do it. What makes a girl look like? Oh no!

Oh! Toothy head! Damn it. That's my guy. That's my guy. That's my guy. I do use teeth. But I'm serious. What makes a girl look like she gives a blowjob with teeth?

What are the qualities? I'm curious. Big teeth. Teeth. Big teeth. Big teeth is the only answer. All right, big teeth. She's got big teeth.

A big princess. A big ass teeth. A princess for sure would use some big teeth, yeah. She's got great teeth. For sure. He looks exactly the same. Hasn't changed, like... I've never seen him standing up, though. I feel. He's got great teeth. For sure. He looks exactly the same. Hasn't changed like... I've never seen him standing up though.

I feel like he's always sitting whenever I see him. I was mad he didn't do the bat pose for all the pictures. You ever seen that? Does he do that? He does. If you pull it up, he holds an invisible bat in all his pictures. Everyone needs something for pictures. Some guys do like the boxing fist.

Yeah. They kind of do. Che does the point. He does like a number one. That bothers me. Yeah. I kind of do. Che does the point. He does like a number one. That bothers me. Yeah. I do a peace sign all the time. He's annoying when he takes pictures.

Peace is good. Peace is universal. I also would love to just stop every guy doing the arms around. Look at that. Look at the invisible bat. He's holding the bat. Oh, yeah. He's doing it.

Got a bat. How do you get into that? You take one photo and you look really good doing it? He does kind of look good doing it. I've gotten worse at getting my photo taken. I've turned my head too far back. My nostrils are where my eyes should be. Do you have some photos like that?

Yeah, you do, but does it make your neck look bigger? Is that why you do it? I don't know why. I don't want your neck to look bigger. I don't want my neck to look bigger. You're very insecure about your tiny ass neck. Oh, fuck. Shut up.

It's covered by the entire mic right now. You can't see it on either side. Did you finish three or are you on three? He's on three. This is three. How is it? Is anybody else going to go get their face painted? Oh, yeah.

Ash has to, but he doesn't know what to get. Kate's there right now. Kate's there right now. Kate's in there right now. Kelly, should we continue? Yeah, absolutely. This was when there were the fires in Sicily. Kelly wrote, I saw this on the news in London.

Pretty crazy, dire situation in Sicily that's been happening at least over a week now. That was a typo. Fire situation is what. Oh, pretty cool. That was an awesome situation. Yeah, pretty fire-ass situation. You basically inserted yourself into a fire in Sicily being like, remember when I was in London? Yes, I did do that. But I also really wasn't lying.

I saw that on the news and I said, that's crazy. I haven't seen that on the news at home. And then I got home and a week later we're seeing the news. So a week ahead of time they're crying for help over there. When you were in London. Yeah, when I was in London. So now we're not paying attention. Somebody should go help them.

Were you doing anything to help? No, I was on a plane flying back to the U.S. Awareness. It was already too late. Awareness. Awareness, exactly. Did you do anything for the fires in Hawaii? What are you doing for the fires?

I'll tell you what, though. No, but you donated a lot to Ukraine. A lot. I donated a lot to Ukraine. No, I stopped thinking about visiting, just like they told me. Oh, wow. That's brave. They said, don't make this your vacation.

Remember they said that? They were like, this is not your vacation. I said, oh, I'm taking it off the list for at least a year. Okay. That's actually huge. Yeah, that is huge. It's a huge pledge. Yeah, I'm in a big travel year right now.

Are you? Yeah, because I haven't been anywhere in my whole life, so I'm trying to knock it all out quick while I can. What? Where else are you going? Where have you been? You went to London. I've been to Tokyo.

Why are you knocking it out quick? I've been to Tokyo once. What do you have planned? Well, nothing. I just want to go to all out quick while I can. Where else are you going? Where have you been? You went to London. I've been to Tokyo. Why are you knocking it out quick? What do you have planned? Well, nothing. I just want to go to all these places. I've wanted to go forever, and so now I went to Tokyo a couple years ago. This is such a presidential move to just go on vacation.

First year as president, you're just going to travel. I'm just going to go on vacation. He's going to check her. No, no. I've had trips planned. I've had trips planned for a long time. I had the London trip was back in July.

I'm going on a writer's retreat. This is actually interesting, No, no. I've had trips planned. I've had trips planned for a long time. I had the London trip was back in July. I'm going on a writer's retreat. This is actually interesting, and I think maybe you guys will like this. Maybe not, though, based on your face right now. But I'm going on this writer's retreat. We also have Kate walking in with us. Hey, Kate. I didn't even know Kate was here. Hey, Kate.

Are you the bee? Hey. Hey. It's Sasko on. What am I going to get? Get the hot dog pizza. What I did. Say, paint whatever you want.

Oh, shit, that was a text after you went in there. They said, make sure you know what you want beforehand. So she must have side-text complained about you. Oh, that sucks. Why not ask the president of the New York office what it is? Yeah. What's it say? Oh, oh my God.

She actually did text that. Yeah. Damn. As I was sitting in the chair. She did complain about you What's your vibe? I know that you do the Joker Like every time

Let's not go things or people Let's go patterns Checkerboard What about a trout? What about a rainbow trout? Rainbow trout Rainbow fish Rainbow fish

I want to do something very minimal Why not rainbow fish? It's so pretty Hot dog I mean hot dog is as minimal as it gets Yeah What about Waldo? That's glasses, right?

Yeah, glasses, but then maybe a little bit of a hat and my eyes. Yankee pinstripes. Oh, it's so much paint. Yeah. You just don't want to wash it off. That's the problem, right? It's a pain in the ass, and it gets all in my eyes. Just go with a red nose, then.

I don't know what I'm doing. Wow, you're going to violate the test. Pizza's going to be the most paint imaginable. What else would I do? Get something angry. I guess pizza's the only option. Get a hot dog. What is a hot dog going to look like?

I don't know. A hot dog. No. Dude. Google hot dog face paint. On his cheek right here. Yeah. Going into his mouth.

I'll do whatever you don't do. I'll probably get checkerboard. You're going to do checkerboard? Maybe. Or pinstripes. Whatever you want. Get Argyle. Or his cheek right here. Yeah. Going into his mouth. I'll do whatever you don't do. I'll probably get checkerboard. You're going to do checkerboard? Maybe our pinstripes, whatever you want. Get Argyle. Or go Paisley. Go Houndstooth. Plaid.

Houndstooth. Houndstooth. Houndstooth. That's a lot of paint, too. That's a lot of paint. Get the Tennessee end zone. Chevron. Oh, look.

Oh, that looks. That's terrible. What the hell? The one on the top. On the top left. Yeah, right there. Wait, what is, how is that on? Yeah, get that. What the hell? The one on the top, on the top left. Yeah, right there. Wait, how is that on? Yeah, get that.

What about that, Tess? That thing's coming. That's a dick. How about the burger? Oh, yeah, there you go. Oh, my God. You got this, Tess. We believe in you.

Yes. What are you guys doing? Do the anonymous thing. I'm telling you. We'll all do musicians. We're going to do musicians? Yeah. All right, that's smart. I'm going to do Bob Dylan. Go on Thunder? Do the anonymous things. I'm not telling you. I'll do musicians. You're going to do musicians? Yeah. All right, that's smart.

I'm going to do Bob Dylan, Rolling Thunder. Do Bob Marley. No. Oh, I'm going to do Kurt Cobain. That's three. What's he doing? What, does he live in a barn? True.

What's your writer's retreat? Oh, yes, I'm going. It's hosted by this author, Kat Marnell, who I really like. She wrote the book, How to Murder Your Life. It's a really good book. Is that a good or a bad thing, murdering your life? Oh, no, it was good. Well, she used to work at-

It's like sucking dick. Rico just went in. She used to work at Condé Nast. She was like a drug problem, all this other stuff. She's now come on the other side of it, whatever. She's hosting this whole thing. It's in Greece, and I booked it back in February, and I've been looking forward to it since February.

So you're paying paying someone money to tell you how to write no it's like a it's like a it's kind of like a group and we're all going to go

and we'll hang out and it'll be creative and interesting I'm interested and I'm going by myself it's a creativity retreat she's going to come back it's not a retreat

for writers it's a writers retreat writers go like minded people yeah girl power pretty much yeah so I'm interested

do you have any guys I don't know maybe i don't know who's going i don't i know nothing about it i'm going by myself i know that i paid for it it was a big uh step out of my comfort zone type thing that i don't have to tell us you paid for we can assume that you paid for well no i mean like it's meaning like i uh i actively chose to do this i didn't just get like you know they didn't ask me to do it or anything i sought it out take down a mean girl pod and be like, oh, we need her. We need her to come through. Are you going to wield your power to hurt Mean Girl at all?

I don't know. I mean, no. They're not here. They're not here. Although Jordan did get a minute on stool scenes where she really stuck it to me. Told me she was voting for Tommy. She really got me there.

She really got me. Nice. I got a little Sasquatch's wallet. Look how much money is in it. What the fuck? That's like a Jersey Jerry wad. I don't even want to go into it, and they all look like the same type of bills.

You just look? Twenties. Is it wrong if we all take bets on how much is in there? It'll never tell us. Oh, yeah, let's see. It'll never tell us. Let's guess. Is it wrong to see and find out? I think it's it's wrong to see but how much can we take out without him

noticing a lot okay it's not just 20s oh a lot of ones oh oh broke boy going to strip clubs broke boy you put the 20 on the outside you know they were kind of like stacked in there like a club sandwich he left it maybe he went to on purpose. Maybe he went to a strip club. Maybe he went to a strip club over the weekend. We know from the Yaks, Sass hates strippers. Yeah, he does. Have L-Facts? Yeah, he doesn't even get hard.

Or does he just only hate strippers in this room? Oh, I don't know. Why would you hate strippers in this room? This is a great stripping room. Weren't there strippers here and he didn't like it? Oh, Kate, have you not ordered a stripper again? I genuinely, genuinely wanted to ask her to come back tonight for the case race. It would have cost you so much money.

I know. If she needed a new couch. Oh, yeah. She would have taken it. Can you buy her a living room? A sectional. Okay. A very high-end sectional couch.

I knew I couldn't afford it. Kelly, next up. The crane that fell in Hell's Kitchen. Oh, yeah. You said, this has me concerned. Can we do a Barstool Sports roll call? I'll be honest. When I first saw that, I thought it was the crane that was right outside of our office.

But then when I did more research, it was in Hell's Kitchen. Although, a lot of people that we have around here live in Hell's Kitchen. So that was my follow-up question. I was still concerned. Top three people you wouldn't want to die. Top three people you would want to die. Ooh, good question, good question. You do have to answer.

Yeah, of course. Right? Yes. These are all, look, see? It says on the top. Can you read that? Yeah. Has to answer.

Some questions for Kelly. Mandatory questions for Kelly. I believe it. I believe it. Let's see. People I wouldn't want to die. Just do would. Would?

Yeah. Okay, because the wouldn't is just like, you know, Dave Erica and somebody else with power. Just, you know, to make sure I still have a job. That's my main concern. So I want all those people to stay alive. And then would you? As far as death, would I want to die? I'm trying to think who would be the funniest.

I mean, Nate might be number one. Like, that would be like. Bad luck, Nate. He'd be coming back from the, like, he would come out of the grave just to complain about how he got killed by the crane. So I would appreciate that. Yep. And I think I might just take him one, two, three. Okay.

Yeah. Good answer. Thank you. Three different cranes. Yeah, three different cranes. You said you were going to do an MRI to see your list of ailments. Oh, yeah, I did. What's your list of ailments?

Want to hear about it? Yeah. Because you might want to see something crazy. So I did this thing. I actually, so I was going to do a whole post about it. No joke. But I didn't because Kim Kardashian did it also. And she's getting ripped apart for doing it. People got big mad. Because it's like, it's not included with insurance. Like you had to pay for it. I paid like, you know, whatever. And I, uh, I just haven't been to the doctor or anything in like 10 years. I didn't

have health insurance for a long time. I'm really lazy about it. I care not enough about my body, whatever. So this came up and a friend of mine did it and said that it was actually pretty informative. It's something that you're able to like see potential aneurysms or, you know, early, early stages of cancer, things like that. Just rules it out. Does everything in your body. It's a full body MRI scan. 55 minutes.

They sit in there. Wow. Too much dick skin on your teeth. Exactly. That's actually the number MRI scan. 55 minutes they sit in there. Wow. Too much dick skin on your teeth. Exactly. That's actually the number one thing. That's the number one thing they had in their report. Did you listen to Taylor Swift? That's the number one thing they had in their report.

We've seen this a lot. I'm going to show you this. I do not want this posted online, but I will show this to you, and you can hold it up. I don't want people having this. Wait, but the show's going to be online. People will see it. Here, I'll read it. No, no, no. I just want you to... You can see the video. Did I send you... I can look at it. Is show's going to be online. People will see it. Here, I'll read it. No, no, no.

I just want you to, you can see the video. Did I send you? I can look at it. Is this you? That's me. That's my body. I posted my brain online, but I didn't want my- Look at your eyeball.

You know, I- What's the worst part? What's the worst part? Nothing is bad about it. I just don't, I feel weird about my whole skeleton being online. Do you have ailments? I've got a couple things. That's no cancer.

This is the craziest thing ever. I know. No cancer, so I'm fine. I want a couple little things. I know. Everybody's making fun of me. I would have done a whole thing and been informative, but I didn't want to get ripped apart. The clink. Was that another one down? Four.

Look at that thing. Isn't that weird? It's my body. Yeah. Did you find out anything that you were like, oh, that makes sense? Yes, I have a hernia that I was like, oh, that makes sense. Oh, I have a hernia that I was like, that makes sense. Oh, you have a penis. Yeah, I saw the cock.

You saw that? I saw your cock and I didn't know what to say. That was the biggest discovery of the day. The biggest. Yeah, that was the biggest discovery. Okay, a couple more questions. You're right. Last two questions. You're mesmerizing. I know. I know. Did you know that Queen Elizabeth had two cousins that she basically, they were invalid

and, is that invalid or right? Invalid. Invalid? What does that mean? They couldn't, I think they were- Invalid. Isn't that what they mean? Their brains were dead.

They were mistakes. I don't know if invalid is like the right word. It went wrong. Well, and then that's, I think, a medical term. But yeah, they had... You didn't? I don't think so, no. So they had them, two cousins, had brain issues. I don't think they could talk.

They put them in homes, and they told the whole world that they died. Oh, wow. And they both lived to like their 80s. Kind of smart. Pretty fucked up, though. And that's your queen? Is it fucked up, or is it protecting them from the masses making fun of them, calling them invalids like you? No, that was the medical definition back then.

Back then? I'm not, I don't, I don't. I don't know. I don't know if that's fucked up. That's just got white face? Are you the moon? Is he a ghoul? Did you get moon?

Are you dead? No, I did Bob Dylan, Rolling Thunder. Oh, okay. I like it. That's what we said. We said we were going to do musicians. You said that. That was the last thing I heard.

You were kidding. No. Is Rico doing a musician? No, that's what you guys told me to do. What's Rico doing? I told him I said we were doing musicians. Oh, okay. Does she know what Bob Dylan, Rolling Thunder was?

Hell no. I don't know what it is. What is it? Is it white like a mime? That's what it looks like in it. He wears white face paint. Pull it up. Is it was? Hell no. I don't know what it is. What is it? That's what he looks like in it. He wears white face paint. Pull it up. Is it identical? Yes.

Yes. If she did black on the sides, which is not what he did. Okay, here we go. I got the post. Queen Elizabeth had two secret cousins. What is this about? Severe disabilities were hidden from the public. Nerissa and Catherine Bowes Lyon were the daughters.

Blah, blah, blah. Both girls were born with severe learning and intellectual disabilities. In 1963, a magazine called Berks Purage claimed that Nerissa had passed in 1940 and that Catherine had passed in 1961. However, in 1987, it was revealed that Catherine was still alive and Nerissa had died in 1986. What do you think about this? Damn.

You know, I need more information because I don't trust it coming out of your mouth, number one. Number two, I also don't. It's off the internet. No, I know, but I'm saying, like, whatever source you're looking at, I don't know.

I don't know. I need more information. Check was sent to the hospital every year for $125. What if you did find out the queen was a bad person? Like, maybe her son was a bad person like maybe her son probably wouldn't be surprised yeah okay if it was like she's an actual piece of shit i think that she probably took a lot of a lot of flack for shitty things and i think also that like i don't know i don't ever think that anything that happened there was just her like i don't think that she was running around

being like she's not smart enough i want this i don't know i think that there's a team of people and she's you know sounds like she wasn't able to make her own decisions. She was a puppet on a string. I think not a puppet, but certainly a part of the group. Could Taylor Swift do something to make you think she's a shithead, a bad person? I've been thinking about this lately, honestly. I forget what happened the other day. Something happened that I was like, oh, no, I hope that that's not true.

I hope that Taylor never does something because it would be really hard for me to talk shit. If she did something bad, I can't pretend like she didn't do something bad. You know what I mean? You pretend her music is good. You just not care. Yeah, you could just not care. And just be like, well, I don't care that she did anything bad. Yeah.

She's probably done something bad. Have you ever rooted for her? Oh, I'm sure. Have we all? What bad thing do you think she's done? Murder? Yeah, she's for her. Have we all. Professional sports team. What bad thing do you think she's done? Murder. Yeah, she's probably murdered. She's probably murdered.

Yeah, true. There are those rumors that she and Harry Styles hit somebody with a car. What? You guys didn't know about this? Sounds real. Harry's bald ass. Drunk driving? There's a rumor.

No, it was like, I don't know. The song Out of the Woods is apparently about it. She wrote a song about it? She wrote a song called Out of the Woods. That's gangster. She key lock? It's about when they hit somebody. YNG Taylor.

Yeah, what the fuck? The lyrics of the song are, Remember when we hit the brakes too soon, 20 stitches in the hospital room. Oh. How do you hit the brakes too soon? They were trying to kill. I was like, because they were just trying to stab him.

What the fuck? People say it. You trying to hit me? Mr. Hydroplane-o. Last one I had was, I actually agree with this one. Okay. You said, I'm sorry, but men in flip-flops anywhere but the beach is so gross. Super gross.

I agree. That stemmed from, I was in the airport, and I was leaving the airport, and I saw a man wearing flip-flops. Oh, no, I'm sorry. It wasn't the airport. I was at Penn Station, which was even worse. So, New Jersey Transit, Penn Station. I saw a man get off the train with flip-flops on,

and his feet blended in with the flip-flops, and it looked like he had no shoes on at first, which is what caught my attention. And it really was just repulsive. And I decided then and there, that's it. But I am guilty. You should worry about your own fucking feet. My high school boyfriend had flip-flops on a lot of the time,

and jeans. He would wear flip-flops and jeans. So that's an embarrassing time in my past. Mark Zuckerberg. But I've grown up since then. Johnson. Yeah. Yeah. I've grown upflops and jeans. So that's an embarrassing time in my past. Mark Zuckerberg. But I've grown up since then. Yeah. Yeah. I've grown up since then, though.

So I'm glad you're- We'll go through airport security with fucking, they have to like kick off flip-flops and go through barefoot. So fucking gross. I can't, I cannot even think about that. What about Birkenstocks? I'm not so grossed out by them.

I understand that they're like a movement, but still, you gotta, I feel like, I don't know. If there's a time where you have to take your shoes off, just wear shoes that you wear socks with. You never have to be barefoot unless you're at the beach, right? Yeah. Why do you have to be barefoot? The lake.

Well, you know, what bodies of water? Live by a lake. Bodies of water. You really don't have to wear shoes at home. Or if you're like out in the outside. Or if you're like a worm farmer. Yeah. On the worm farm, it's that kind of vibe overall.

You can't afford shoes. If you work in agriculture and all those things, you can wear no shoes if you want. Well, not when I'm very... But if you live in Sicily and your house burned down... Well, then I think you should

definitely put some shoes on. Well, if your shoes are in the house. Yeah, your shoes are in the house. And all you can afford now is flip-flops. What if you're an invalid and you're part of the royal family, but they don't send you shoes? Well, then I think...

I mean, I don't know. You're dead anyway, apparently. So do you need shoes as well? Oh, they lived for a very long time. No, but the rumor was that they lied and said that they were all dead. So who's sending them shoes? I don't think the invalids lied. No, they had no ability to.

People were lying. Actually, that's all they could do is lie around. So you're saying, like, do these invalids need shoes anyway? Let's not use that word. It's making me feel. It is a bad word, right? I don't know what the word is. I don't know why. I thought it was a medical definition. I think it's said a word. It's making me... It is a bad word, right? I don't know what the word is. I don't know why.

I thought it was a medical definition. I think it's a bad word. If somebody can't say a word, let's just hold on to this one for a little while longer. I think it's a bad word. A little while longer. Let's take invalid as far as we can take it. Can we get an update here?

You got a pee? Five. You got a pee at all? How's your time, Tom? Why are you looking at me like you want a five? What's happening? Why are you asking me if I want a pee? Do you want a hope?

No, I'm asking you to hold it for me. Not to give you the A and W. Ass and whooping. Keep drinking. You've had five root beers. I'm concerned about you. I can get you some more ice. Could you get me some more ice?

I'll get you some more ice. More ice. Nick, what are you going to do for face paint? We're going to do musicians. What are you going to do? Probably insane clown posse. Oh, nice. It's empty.

Get out. I missed the boat. What musician could this be? Pop on some more eyebrows and then you can be like... Dimebag Daryl from Pantera?

Oh, yeah. Rest in peace. Yeah. That was all my questions, Kelly. All right, cool. It's always a treat seeing you. I do miss you. Congratulations.

What's New York's diplomatic position on Chicago? As a whole? Well, you know, the rivalry I feel like is, you know, fun sometimes, but then it gets too serious. Everything gets too serious too quick. That's what happens.

Even with the election that happened, it got too serious too fast. I'm just getting harassed online right now. People think I'm literally Hillary Clinton. People are talking to me as if I'm going to ruin this company. I have no power at all. I don't know how many times I have to say it. Have them suicided. Have them suicide.

People took that poster that Tommy made about you, and they took it very seriously. It was just for fun inside the office, and yes, the office likes me better than Tommy, and that's all that I care about. So we're going to have to take the nuclear launch codes from you once a month? Yeah. Yes.

Honestly, yes. No joke. So you want a rivalry or no? I think that as long as we keep the rivalry light, it will be fun. Otherwise, if it gets too serious, then it's not fun anymore. It was very quick that I left the office and everyone was like, we fucking hated that guy. Yeah?

You heard that? You heard all those rumors? Everybody was talking shit behind your back? I mean, that's fine. I can't do anything about it. I think that, was it when you left? Were we not saying that before you left?

The door was shutting. It was like, see you guys. Great time. We're still coworkers. It did miss your last day. When was your last day? Did you have like a party?

No. It's this week. It's this week, kind of. This week is technically the last. All right. Well, maybe we'll whip it up. I don't feel welcome here anymore. Maybe we'll mend fences.

That was fast. Maybe everyone will mend fences. Maybe a cookie cake. Maybe a cookie cake. Do you think you cried a little too much about the Axtar Well, maybe we'll whoop it up. I don't feel welcome here anymore. Maybe we'll mend fences. That was fast. Maybe everyone will mend fences. Maybe a cookie cake. Maybe a cookie cake. Do you think you cried a little too much about the Axtar time, maybe? No, I don't. You don't think so? No, I don't.

Okay. No. Then that's fine. I don't at all. Good. Good. No. Do you think fences will be mended from New York to Chicago?

Yeah, I'd hope so. Do you think the Braves will come together? I'd hope so. Okay. I got no ill will. I don hope so. I got no ill will. I don't either. I'm just sitting here. Listen, I stayed out of that whole thing. I was like, this is not my fight. Which is big of me because I love to

insert myself. You do like to insert yourself. Which side would you have taken? I don't understand why anybody cares about it at all. I understand that people have their things and this is your thing. Yeah, we've been doing this for a while.

Yeah, I get it. I was more bothered that when we got Barstool back, it was like, oh, we can work again. It's like, what have we been doing for the last three years? Every single day. Working every single day. I think everybody was working. I think it came at a time where the morale inside the New York office was so bad. Right. And also, we had our big company meeting,

and you were like, oh, we're headed off to Chicago. Anybody can visit whenever they want and play on all of our games and our basketball courts. Oh, that was nice. You thought that was mean? It was a little rub it in our face. I want people to be able to come. It was like the day after we got all the shitty mismatched chairs,

and you were like, oh, well, peace. We're going to go hang out in our games. That's not what I said. That's kind of how it felt. I said anyone who, like, you should feel welcome to come. You were carrying around a basketball. We're like, where hang out. That's not what I said. That's kind of how I said anyone who you should feel welcome to come. You were carrying around a basketball. Like, where the fuck do I put this? Where do I fucking put this basketball?

I think it was just it was a rejuvenation. We'll see how long, you know, people people get hype for a couple of days, a couple of weeks, and then I'm sure they'll all settle back in. I think I think the president of New York has to visit the Chicago. Why don't you do it? I think that I am scheduled to visit the Greek office. We need to make a big, yeah, like a diplomatic...

That's what I did. Okay, perfect. I can't believe that genuine invite was seen as rubbing it in everyone's face. I'm busting your balls. I would like you to come. I did see it and I went, oh, please, rub it in our face.

I said that in my head. I'm extending passing your balls. Okay. Nobody was like, fuck that guy. I would like you to come. But I did see it and I went, oh, please, rub it in our face. I said that in my head. Well, I'm extending the invite. I'd love to come. A diplomatic invite. We'll have a fucking big ribbon. And you have ambassadors in each office. Well, that I have planned already. I have to put a log out.

Spider is our ambassador, but he also could be a spy. Yeah, he's a spy. Well, you're my ambassador. Spider was texting me. Spider was texting me on the side. Spider was voting for me. He was texting me being like, someone needs to keep those people in line.

I vote for you. I would have voted for you. I want you to know. I would have voted for you. Zoo animals. Yeah. Someone needs to keep those New York freaks in line. I'm the perfect person for the job.

I would have absolutely voted for you. A vote against Tommy is a vote for justice. That's how I feel. That's how I felt too. He would have actually been a dictator. No, I know. That's what I'm saying. I just feel good that people like me more than him

or 52% of people like me more than him. That's all that really matters to me. And that was close. Who do you think swung the vote? I don't know, but there are a lot of people that didn't vote. People that forgot. Marty fucking forgot. I was like, you're right. But Marty going over to your side could definitely have a delegation. That definitely helped.

Well, I think him going over to my side probably hurt me because if it were just if it were the three of us still the votes would have been split between them and then I would have gotten more he was right about that Billy said some shit about like school elections how girls always go in and the girls always win because the guy votes are split and

then all the girls vote for the girl and that definitely would have happened they consolidated the guy vote exactly so it was boys versus girls but the girls won this the girl, and that definitely would have happened. Well, they consolidated the guy vote. Exactly. So it was boys versus girls, but the girls won this time. Damn. We're on our way up. And like I did promise, as soon as Barbie comes out on HBO, I'm going to play it on every screen all day long.

I like that. That's a power move. With the bad map and everything? Exactly, with the bad map and everything. It's going to be great. Awesome. All right, well, thank you, Kelly. The questions were good.

I will now have, I'm going to refresh. So we'll keep it running. Every time I see you, I'll have questions for you. I look forward to that. I do miss you. I miss you as well. Our talks. I look forward to my trip out west.

Yes. You should take it by horse and buggy. Oh my God, yeah. Or a train. Wagon. The Queen's Carriage. Yeah. The Queen's Carriage. Yeah, the Queen's Carriage. How are we feeling, Tim?

Belly full? No, not yet. Not a five in. I need pace. I need a little bit more pace. I need urgency. I need urgency. There hasn't been a single belch, though.

Where's it going? I'm concerned about that. I did want to discuss that with you. Can I belch? Oh my gosh, yes. By all means. If you drink that can, that counts as two. Okay.

Yeah. So that'd be seven. Straight from the can. I think Brandon got lost. Yeah, did he go to get ice? Oh, yeah. What the hell? Is he eating?

He's ordering Chick-fil-A. Check your phone. Oh, shit. God damn it. Hopefully he's not in the bathroom with Mike. Did he get pulled into unnecessary roughness? Brandon flushes balls. Oh, he's getting cornered about Pick Central.

Oh, hell yeah. With facees balls. Oh, he's getting cornered about pick central. Oh, hell yeah. With face paint on. Oh, yes. Cornered. He didn't even come back with the ice. He doesn't even have the ice. The ice. Where's the ice?

Connor's got it. Yeah. How'd that talk go? Connor Griffin's got it. I got cornered. I got cornered, yeah. About what? I got cornered. About what?ed, yeah. About what? I got cornered.

About what? About the time slot for mostly sports. What is it? We don't know yet. What's the answer going to be? That's a thing that people don't even realize. Apparently, you just get cornered for time slots around this motherfucker now. Well, people don't realize that when Brandon wanted to do a new show.

There we go. Oh, yeah. That resonated. That counts as two. That's seven. When Brandon wanted to do a new show, he wanted oh yeah that resonates that counts as two that's seven when brandon wanted a new new do a new show he wanted to do the pick central time so i said no you can't do that that pick central has been going it was an established show it's been running for i stood up for the pick centrals guys yeah he said i yeah let them have the spot you go an hour before them

so i started making plans for 11 11 Eastern and 10 Central for three months. That's been my time slot. And then Kevin came in and moved them last week, and they took my time slot. So what's your new time slot going to be? I'm not going to change it. We're going to go to 11. Why don't you just go earlier?

You're going to go against? Because I've already moved for them once. Yeah, but a morning show hasn't even aired yet. I moved for them once. People are used to it. People are used to listening to mostly sports at 11. And you'd have the wake-up mincey bump whenever that comes around. Shouldn't you discuss this with Mark?

Mark pretty much just goes with whatever. Your commute, you should go to the office early. That doesn't make sense. It makes perfect sense. I'm not worried about my commute. My commute shouldn't be a factor in these conversations. You should worry about your commute. Rush hour would be brutal.

You should be an 8 a.m. to 2.30 p.m. guy. But that's beside the point. A month ago, or three months ago, when it was time for, when we were leaving and starting the show, they wanted to keep the time slot. Which I defended them. Fine. And I said, okay, that makes sense. I moved

an hour, and then somebody else wanted their time slot. They jumped out of the way and took my spot. If they want to jump out of his way, don't take the spot. Don't take the spot that I already moved to. Got issues. You understand? I understand. You're fucked in the head. I'm a fucked in the head. And I just also, Big Evan Marty cornered me,

and I was trying to have a serious conversation where I was trying to act mad at him, and I was wearing to have a serious conversation where I was trying to act mad at him. I was wearing this fucking face paint. At one point, I said, Big Ev, we can't talk if I'm wearing this. He said, I can get past it if you can. And so we just had this tense conversation with me dressed like David Harris. You're going against your former show? What type of wrestling shit is that? They're going against me.

Where'd you leave it? I don't know. I said, we'll figure it out. Why don't you do an evening show? Oh. No, I can't do an evening show. I have been telling Pick Central they should go evening for- The Damling Show should go later.

It should have always gone later, but whatever. People don't want to work. Late. People don't want to work. Late. Or early. You're part of the problem. I would so much rather have the YAC be at like 5 p.m.

Yeah. It was for three years. We did it at 6 p.m. I do think there's value, and somebody's got to grab the early morning spot at Barstool. Pick up Mincy. Somebody has to. I mean, yeah. And if that's maybe the best thing for us, maybe.

Somewhat sports. Me and Roan's new show. Oh, yeah. Same time slot as you guys. A little bit of sports. Some why sports. I don't even still understand. I do think that doing two shows at the same time is dumb because i would imagine

that live viewers helps advertisers i don't understand a lot of things i don't understand why why we had to rearrange the schedule in the first place why we couldn't just found an empty spot for the new show that's what i don't understand why don't we change everything i don't know brother is what it is we'll figure it out. Just fucking quit then. Not that big of a deal. Yeah. I don't know. I might stick with cans.

Yeah. Count us two. Where'd you find the ice? I had to go behind the bar upstairs. Okay. Behind the bar upstairs. That's the only place you can get it. So you just got in a full fight with David Bowie.

You did. Are you guys going to get face paint? What the hell's going on here? I think Rico's in there now. You didn't get face paint. Bob Dylan rolling thunder, brother. You just got a light coating of white. There's nothing you could confuse him.

This is Bob Dylan rolling thunder. You're like one of those ghosts from Super Mario World that move when you're not looking at them. You said you didn't want a lot of paint. You got your entire face paint. That's a really good point. This was an easy one. I don't like sitting in there for so long and having to be like making noises out of my nose. No idea.

Is he doing a musician? I'm holding my breath. Did you tell him musician? I did, yeah. So what is he, a physician? He'll do kiss. Physician. He'll do kiss or he's going to do kiss.

Oh, Tim, get it out. I like it. You're at nine? Well, we're counting a can as two because that's what if you pour it in glass. Oh. Mimic the Cheesecake Factory. Yeah, go back to the glass. Cooler's wild.

I like that. Colorful cooler. Beach cooler. Remember when you made that porn CD? Oh, yeah. Yeah? What about it? What did you have to...

I don't know. That was an open-ended question. I guess there's no way to phrase this. Were you looking at titties and cooch all day for work? No. Did you see any? Yeah, I saw the videos. Okay.

Was it the same chick every time? Nothing live. Let me refresh what this is about. Poker party. You designed this game. You designed this game. The interactive strip poker game. Is that Kathy Willits?

Yeah, she's America's favorite nympho, right? I remember her. Wait, you could play against six beautiful opponents? Yeah, there's a back screen to this, too. I don't know if he's got the other picture. Was the intent to have dudes undressing at their home playing against their computer? Do whatever you want. I assumed the computer never won. In your privacy.

Or just like you lost all the time. That was actually a very good overall. You'd be surprised how difficult it was to beat them and get through to the end. They're geniuses. How many times did you beat them? I just coded a special backdoor so I could get through any time. Nice. Was it hard work?

Yeah, it was rock hard. Yeah, I was like, it was. TJ's mom is also in the booth. Oh, shit. TJ wants to be anywhere but here right now. Oh, TJ's right between them. When does this come out? Wednesday?

Thursday. Thursday? Thursday. Thursday. At TreeTurtle. At TreeTurtle. Man, we got to get our hands on that game or a modern version of it with some AI. Andrew tried to look at it.

It's not runnable in modern operating systems. You were able to access the folders, but you couldn't actually do anything with them. So we've got to buy an old computer. Can we pull it back up? You could take apart the videos. They're on there. Have you thought about putting more words on the front?

I coded it. I didn't design the cover. Play your cards right. You can take the shirt off their backs and then sell them. Where else was their shirts? Wow. How did this? Did you have a friend that was like, buddy, I've got a job for you?

Or was it? How did you stumble into it? Somebody had learned about my website where I used to do some consulting work on the side to code different things. I used to code a lot of screensavers. I did some work for a couple of ad agencies on the side to code different things. I used to code a lot of screensavers. I did some work for a couple of ad agencies on the side. You coded screensavers? Yeah. Like the stars that came at you? Yeah.

Is this the only Naked Woman game you ever coded? This is the only Naked Woman game I've ever coded. Any famous screensavers? Do we know your work? No. Under the Pipes. Did you ever meet the pipes guy? No I never met the pipes guy That was crazy

The way they changed colors That's a Hitchings What are the most famous? The maze The earth The mountains one Mountains Oh yeah the pipes

Man You remember the flying toasters? Yes Flying toasters Was the pipes guy Man. Watch out all the time. You remember the flying toasters? Yes. Flying toasters. Was the pipes guy the goat? Is he the goat? I mean, look at that. Dan Flash's shirt now.

Yeah. Sorry. Gotta go somewhere. When are you guys getting your faces painted? He goes in there now. You're so nervous. Show's not for another three hours. It's such a long wait. I'm not getting my face painted. No, you're not. Thank you

Good if you want Wouldn't mind if you went before me just so I don't have to sit in the face paint all day I'm like a root beer. He's hoping that the wet we just done this myself. Oh, yeah, you want to spin the wheel? Hey, what if the wet will have been very actively? No, no, but we could we could spin the wheel? Hey, what if the wet wheel hits? He's been very... He's actively hoping for a wet wheel. No, no, no, but we can spin the wheel whenever we want. Yeah, we can spin whenever we want. I only had nine. Then you've got to get repainted.

Or you could put a plastic bag over your head. I'll allow it. Well, I'll do. Sweet child. Is that Dylan? There he goes. He's drinking. Where do we go now?

Your face painted is Bob Dylan. Come back and sing Guns N' Roses. I've had Guns N' Roses stuck in my head all day. Why are you guys feuding so hard today? We're not feuding. You are feuding hard. I can't wait until this case race. You're feuding hard.

Brandon drinks zero drinks and you put the team on your back. Brandon's on my fucking dick right now. They're going to implode, Big Cat. They're going to be hard. That was the other show. Hop off, brother. Totally different show. Hop off.

These guys can't stop beefing with each other. Why don't you guys settle it out with a nice ball tangle and whoever can pull away from the other fastest. It's going to look like when those rats get tangled up in the ground. Sprinting away from each other. And just their balls. In like 7,000 years, they'll find their skeletons tangled with each other like two deers who hooked antlers.

Yeah, the deers hooking antlers. We talked about king rats before. It's when rats get tangled up by their tails and they just die in this huge ball of rat. Is that a real thing? Yeah, that's what happens to deers all the time. I think it's going to happen to your testicles. Your balls. I mean, there are some

long balls. There has to have been balls that got tangled before. Yeah, my friend's balls got tangled. Just his own balls. His own before. Yeah. My friend's balls got tangled. Just his own balls. His own balls. Yeah, torsion. It's one of my biggest fears. Oh, yeah.

It's the worst pain he's ever, yeah. And then he said the release from it was like the greatest feeling he's ever had. So he's addicted to it now? Is he doing like a kickflip or something? Like, what was he doing? Oh, he was just like walking and they got tangled up. Sleeping naked can happen. Yeah.

What? You're having a night terror. You're. Sleeping naked can happen. Yeah. What? If you're having a night terror. If you're having a long, bald day. Yeah. And he sat in his bathtub and then they just. If you sleep naked, you're shitting your sheets. Yeah. People fart every night when they're asleep, no matter who you are, no matter your gender,

and you are pooping your sheets. Nudist colonies. I'm like, you're all sitting on each other's poop a little bit. Yeah. I could never. I've tried. I never could. Never takes. What? Yeah. I could never. I've tried. I never could. Never takes.

Yeah. I hate it. Wake up fully clothed. Yep. Not even. I wake up with a Canada goose jacket on. Sewn into. Mummified.

Yeah. Sewn into a sleeping bag. Yeah, you boys have to tangle your balls. Takes two to tangle. Losers tangle. Put it on the have to tangle your balls. Takes two to tangle. Losers tangle. Put it on the wheel. Tangle your balls. Tangle balls. Man, people have to be massively disappointed that Sass doesn't have a nice tight sack.

People gotta be so pissed off. What's the point of youth if you have long balls? Ask myself that every day. When you hit 30, it's gonna be dragging behind you. My knees. God. Why, God?

Is there an operation for that? There's got to be. Testicular rejuvenation. Ball tightening? I want child balls, Doc. There's that guy who got a liter of his son's blood to get his balls tighter. Did you guys see that story? A famous dude, right?

A super famous guy who's like 45 and thinks he looks 18, but he just looks 45. He's just been pumping his blood in to get his... This is like a bad 45. Yeah, just like a... It's like a scary 45. Who is this? Can we see him?

This guy who is just like transplant, transfusion, whatever, taking his son's blood. That was 11. Let's go. Looks like what I look like right now. He looks like my face. He looks like a melted wax figure. Looks fucking crazy.

Like slick back hair, but it's like a 90s idea of what a surfer is. He's like Point Break style hair. Be like, I'm actually young now because I took my son's blood. He like gelled up his hair. That was the proof that he was young. He has a puka shell necklace on. I'm actually son's blood. He like gelled up his hair. That was the proof that he was... He has a puka shell necklace on.

I'm actually a child now. After drinking my son's semen. There's a tech CEO that did the same thing. I think this is who I'm talking about. Or maybe a different guy. These guys are just spinning... Despite it not working. That's awesome.

It's like when X tried to shoot off that rocket and it fucking failed. They're like, no, it was supposed to fail. Perfect, perfect launch. I also think of myself as a teen. And if my dad was like, hey, I need your plasma. I'd be like, ew, no. He does look young. What does he look like?

No, he doesn't. He looks like a robot. Like an action figure. Eye in the middle? I would say that guy's like 55. He looks older than he is. He looks like a robot. He looks like an action figure. Eye in the middle? I would say that guy's like 55. Yeah, he looks older than he is. He looks old as fuck to me. Hey, what?

He does have a necklace. I feel like he looks pretty young. Who's the guy on the left? His dad. I wish I had that. That's what he would, I guess, look like. He's like anything to not look like that guy. I want to be like my young boy.

His dad was photoshopped in. Tiny ass family. Young plasma. Are y'all not getting your face painted? I guess I'm supposed to be at 420. Rico's doing the Sistine Chapel on his face. Why is Rico pinned in there for fucking hours? Connor said he's complaining.

He's doing Gautier. Rico's complaining. The guy said artist and he's doing somebody that I used to know. It looks pretty sweet with the glasses. Does it? Are you doing young, regular, or old? That looks awesome. Regular, I'll do young.

I'll try to do baby. Will she be able to do that? I don't know. That's way out of my mind. I'm going with three. What's the report, Connor? Rico's done, so whoever wants to. What did Rico get?

Should I say it? No. Yeah, say it. Why not? See him. What's the report, Connor? What did Rico get? No. I don't see him. He got Post Malone. Oh! What did that take so long? The tattoos? He probably had to do the tats. Nick, you want to go?

I think you're next up. What are you going to do, Nick? Insane clown pasta. Oh, yeah. Let's go, Nick. ICP. When they marched on Washington, D.C. against the FBI, I went down for that. It's an interesting group.

Wait. Juggalos? Oh, the Juggalos? Yeah, they marched on D.C. The FBI labeled them not a terrorist group, but a gang, like an official gang. And so they went to protest being labeled a gang. That can hurt their jobs like a gang thing to do is go down there all together and be like we're not a gang we're

just gonna get everyone together and march on washington yeah yeah like the million man march that fucking gang bastards anytime a helicopter flew over which there's just helicopters all over dc they thought it was the fbi FBI watching them and they would flip off all the helicopters. Yeah, they were. You've seen Goodfellas? I have. I love it so much. I fucking love that movie.

No way. It's a deep cut. I think it just finished 12. Yep. How do you think this is going, Tim? I'm fine. Okay.

It's not like I'm drunk. How do you think this is going, TJ? I'm just happy he's happy. Ev! What was it? We don't have to get into the details, but what was it like having an argument with David Bowie? I mean, I won.

I'm joking. I told him I said I can look past it, but I was just laughing the whole time. He didn't want to. I said, we've got to have this conversation later when I'm not dressed like this. Good on you to corner him while he's weak. I was like, no, I can look past it.

There's also two of y'all. It was two of us, it's true. You're David Bowie. I try, but they came. You're Brandon Walker, David Bowie, and Ziggy Stardust, so that's three on one. Our kitchen is oriented right there where we got the table and then the fridge and then there's an empty space. I was in the space and I couldn't get out.

We did corner him, that's kind of true. I like that. All right, that's all. I've always wondered what it's like to get in a fight with David Bowie. We did corner him. That's kind of true. I like that. All right, that's all. I've always wondered what it's like to get in a fight with David Bowie. It's a dream. Who did David Bowie fight?

Did he have public beef with anyone? He had beef. Well. Not publicly. What movie was he in? He was in one of those fucking magician movies.

The Labyrinth. The Labyrinth. He was spinning the balls. Always under pressure. But he played Tesla. The Labyrinth. He was always under pressure. But he played Tesla in The Prestige or the other one. You need to watch The Prestige. It's fucking fire. I've got people in my life that say The Prestige is their favorite movie,

and I've never seen it. It's supposed to be phenomenal. Why is everyone saying it's supposed to be like a... No one's watched it? Like a 9 out of 10 on Amazon. I've never even heard of it. I always want to watch it when I go home, and my mom never wants to watch it. She doesn't like magic movies.

Wait, so when you go home, you walk in the door, you're like, Mom, I want to watch this magic movie. No, we always watch movies, and I'm like, let's watch The Prestige. It looks great. She's like, nah. I was like, I don't want to watch The Prestige. You always want to watch that. It's not about magic.

You live in the city alone where you can watch it whenever you want. It's about the world of it. It's not like. No, it's about like the perfect trick, isn't it? I got to watch it, so don't ruin it. That's the third part of the prestige. DJ, are you proud of your dad right now? Hey, bro's crushing it.

He really is. You're making it seem super easy. I haven't thrown up yet, though. Are you struggling at all at this point? How did you know it was 20 on the initial date? It's very difficult talking to you and not thinking of the bee right now. Awesome. That's my favorite look.

You saw Pat when he looked like that for a while? Oh, yeah. For no reason. There was no reason behind it. Well, he looked cool. I thought it had to do with what he was doing in production at the time. It worked on me. Yeah.

I'm liking myself right now. Yes. Hello. What's up? All I need is a Coke now. We're all set. Yeah, how did you know it was 20 on the dot? Good question, Ronan.

I guess. Okay. Could be more, could be less. We'll never know. Oh. Well, as long as it's 20 today, then it's corroborated. The entire premise of the show was based on it being 20. Well, he's got to get 20 on the dot.

That's not what he started out with. He went straight to 30 as soon as the story was over. Well, that's Big Cat. He's always going to go 10 more. I know. Yeah, it's called the 10X mentality. You know that. Just Dr. He's always going to go 10 more. I know. Yeah, it's called the 10X mentality. You know that. Just Dr. Evil every time he comes up with something.

You fucking know that, dude. You escalate, you escalate, you escalate, you escalate. Grant Cardone. Is that still? Oh, yeah. Stronger than ever. Is it? People base their life around it.

Yeah, I love the- He's making his kid does the face of it now because he's got that kid poised. I saw him bragging the other day that his kid's going to enter college a millionaire. Yeah. Is that here or maybe somewhere else?

Maybe that was on TikTok. But is that even a brag? It's like, wouldn't... You said I could... If he's entering college a billionaire, why is he going to college? And also, is that not a... That's not a brag.

Your dad's a millionaire. Yeah. Right. Or if he just puts money in the Your dad's a millionaire. Yeah. Right. Or if he just puts money in the trust fund for him, I guess. Right.

I guess he's just going to fuck. How does a trust fund work? Do you get the money instantly? You have to determine the

age. Okay. You'll get some when you're 25, some when you're 30, I think. Yeah. I've got to decide

on my four kids how I'm going to divvy up the money because they're not getting 25% each because I do like some better. Right. I've just got to decide out of my four kids how I'm going to divvy up the money because they're not getting 25% each because I do like some better. Right. Just got to decide who's getting the smallest percentage. Is it only going to your kids?

What about some to the program? What program? State. I think it will all be my kids, maybe my wife. What about your sister? I just ruined her car for her. What else do you want me to do for her? I would definitely give 25% to the program.

Yeah, me too. You want me to give 25% of my fortune to the Yak? No, I'm talking about the state. The state. Oh, I am already giving that. What would you like named after you there? If you could have anything named after you there. I think money to a college that you didn't go to is fucking insane.

Really? So crazy. You could probably do it at Notre Dame. Crazy. I'm trying to get players, buddy. I'm trying to get players. It's crazy. I'm trying to get players.

You should start scouting. You just need one man's L. It would change the program forever. We're already. Who do you got? Who's the pipeline? Who's the top high school players right now? Yeah, who in the pipeline?

We're good. We're fine. Things are good. Any guys coming out of Mass? We don't usually recruit a lot of guys coming out of Massachusetts. Pennsylvania's a hotbed. I'll get you some of these St. Joe prep boys. We stay mostly in the southeast. You talk to some of these St. Joe prep boys, those are dogs

over there. Smart players, too. You need some dogs? We need some dogs. You need some dogs. Marvin Harrison Jr. is a St. Joe's prep boy. Come on, man. That means the quarterback? Jeremiah Trotter Jr. is a –

Does that mean the quarterback for Ohio State this year? Kyle McCord is, yes. He's a St. Joe prep guy. He was in Neighborhood Eats. I think he's going to win that job. He already won it. Kyle McCord? Yeah. When did they say that? Wednesday. I think he's going to win that job. He already won it. Oh, Comic-Con? Yeah.

When did they say that? Wednesday. I think Devin Brown's got that. No. He already got that. He already got that. That's another one for Papa Hitch. He's crushing it.

Yeah. Putting in work. Sending Connor on an ice run. Smart. Smart man. He's going to work today. Let's look at top recruits ice run. Smart. Smart man. Let's go to work today. Let's look at top recruits right now. Please.

By the way. Let's get some guys in there. I knew. Number four, Andrew Rapalaya. He's coming out of Milton Mass. Oh, good for him. Yeah. He's going to Penn State.

What sport? Football. He's number four. He's the fourth biggest recruit. In the nation? Yes. He's going to Penn State. What sport? Football. He's number four. He's the fourth biggest recruit. In the nation? Yes. He's going to state. My state.

What position is he in? I don't have to give any money for that to happen. Oh, let's see. Sounds like a tackle. Kicker. Tight end. Ooh. Rap player.

He's a white boy. Baby Gronk? I'm going to go ahead and say the number four recruit in the country is not a white tight end from Massachusetts. 6'4", 240. Or 6'5", 240. East. It says he's 6'4", 253.

Why do you keep – Not a Milton Mass. What numbers? I don't know. They changed it up. Let's see. Number one is Samson Okunlola. Oh, he's from – oh, my God.

They're all from Mass. Look at the Mass. Yeah, I am looking at Mass. They're all from Mass. Oh, shit. What the hell? Oh, my God. They're all from Mass.

All the best college football players in the country are all colored. Resort. It's all from Brockton and Rockland. Resort to country. Or the whole country. Freaking Malcolm Lola again, dude. That guy's going to be a beast. All right, let's see all state.

Arch Manning. Thank you. That's last year. The number one this year is a defensive lineman from Missouri. Any Mass boys in the top ten? No. Oh, I guess Raiola. Oh, Raiola, yeah.

Dominic Raiola, son? Yeah. Holy shit. any mass boys in the top 10 no i guess this is oh yeah holy shit man that makes me feel old there's the defensive tackle he's not going where's rayola going georgia yeah he already acted he's not going to brasil he already transferred to uh to georgia to play high school was rayola a 6-1 tackle wasn Wasn't he a center? He was a center. Okay, I'm thinking of someone else. His brother went to Wisconsin. I'm thinking of the Chargers. That was a 6'1 tackle. It didn't make any fucking sense to me.

He was a wild boy, too. Raiola? Yeah. His son is very viral on TikTok because he trains with Mahomes' QB coach. So everybody's, like, prophesying him. Where's Baby Diggs? I think he's 2027. Wait, so all of these guys are from

Massachusetts? Baby Diggs. I haven't seen a mask yet. I don't know. Aaron Noland. That's a good name. Yeah, he's going to Ohio State. He's in Connecticut. Wait, so the number four in the country isn't a white tight end from

Milton Mass? By the way, Wait, so the number four in the country isn't a white tight end from Milton Mast? By the way, High Noon, High Noon. If you're a tequila lover who's never satisfied with malt-hard seltzer offerings, you're going to love the new High Noon Tequila Seltzer Premium Hard Seltzer. Made with real tequila and real juice. Clean finish because it's made with real Blanco tequila. Only 100 calories. Gluten-free and no added sugar available in four bright crisp flavors.

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Yeah? Yeah. Minkins? Yeah, he's going to be a legend. Class 2026, he's already committed. What does he play? Opposition. Football.

Another one for Mr. Hitchings. Running back, but he's a small guy, 5'10", 200. I don't know if he's going to make it. That is the quintessential size for a running back. You just worry, you know, that 510. That's exactly – 510-200 is what you want a running back to be. I think 200 is a little bit light in the ass. 510-205, 210?

I'd want 511-240. A little big. That's Mike Allstock. Not if he got that speed, though. 511-240 is not going to have that speed. 240 with speed? 240 is straight muscle. Mike Tolbert.

Use your brain. Who's the heaviest pro there ever was? There's been 400. The guy in the Eagles. Or Davis is massive. No, Maialata. He's massive too. He's a hilarious freshman this year who's like 4'60". Yeah.

4'60"? For who? I don't know how he plays for. Do you know? Tight body forward. Definitely has a tight body, right? Might be Tech. Might be Tech. Might be Tech.

It's a guy that's like 5'11", or 6'1", 4'6". There he is. Oh, shit. What team does he play for? Big Bubba. This might not be him. Brandon, you guys aren't getting anyone. Big Bubba.

Yes, we are. Just relax. We're looking right now. Brandon, you guys aren't getting anyone. It's Big Bubba. Yes, we are. Just relax. We're looking right now. Everyone's going to Georgia, Ohio State. Right. That's where players go. Arizona. It's tough to see.

Arizona's working. There you go. Yeah, that's right. And all the replies are like, I can't wait until our strength and conditioning coach gets his hands on him. Alabama. Brandon, you guys aren't getting shit. I'm in, like, the top 40s for Ole Miss. We don't start in the 40s. We. Brandon, you guys aren't getting shit. I'm in like the top 40s for –

We don't start in the 40s. We start in like the 90s. Ole Miss is getting the top 30. No. That's got to hurt. He's not really going to Ole Miss. He means like going to Ole Miss. Hey, did you have any retraction from the two East retraction?

Oh, 100% no. I think they're lying. I don't believe a word they're saying. And the fact – you know what? Never mind. What? Everyone's going to Ole Miss. All the Mississippi guys are going to Ole Miss.

No, they're not. It's like everyone. And you stop. I don't want to get mad about recruiting on here. Are you all going to Georgia and Ole Miss? Are you donating enough money? No. You got to up that to 40%.

I just started getting the money. Why did you get this freaking house, Brandon? This is last year. I don't care about your team, Brandon. Brandon, I'm in the top 100 recruits coming – oh, here we go, 97. All right, you guys got Jimothy Lewis, 97. Jimothy? Jimothy?

That's his name, Jimothy. What we're doing here? The laughing stock. She's looking at some recruits. AJ Harrell, that's my guy. That's the best player in Mississippi. What year are you guys looking at, though? Because I'm looking at, I think I'm at 24 right now.

Okay, they're at 33rd in the country. They have five four-stars. This is hilarious. Just to piss off Brandon, where's Wisconsin at? Oh, I'm not seeing a lot of Wisconsin. Wisconsin's 23rd. Oh, okay. We're more of a...

I'm looking at top recruits coming out of Mississippi. We don't finish. That's not how recruiting works. We don't finish top 25 in recruiting. That's not how recruiting works. We don't finish top 25 in recruiting. That's not how it works. I would want to be picked up some boys who care about this town, you know? Care about West Point. West Point is not where Mississippi State is.

I just want a group of guys that are local. Care about this rivalry. Care about this. All to the earth, guys. I'm working on it. We have a four-star from West Point who is committed to Florida right now. What? I mean, Florida has the number three class.

I got to fix that. How could you let that happen? How are you working on it? Stephen Che. What are you waving at? Stephen Che. Oh. You brought me ice.

Well, I think that's for the case, right? Yeah. I don't think... Came in with like five bats. Slow your roll there, Tim. You's for the case. Yeah. I don't think. Came in with like five. Slow your roll there, Tim. You just went from loser to winner. Let's relax. Who's number one?

Who's got the first pick? First pick? Can we just. I can't talk football recruiting. He's talking number four recruiting. You should start a college football podcast. Recruiting. Where you just read off your phone the whole time. Conn and Daniels? Is that who you're talking about? He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. He's recruiting. It was like, wow, 10th in the state. How about Julian Lewis? Why don't we see if we can get him over to fucking.

I don't know who Julian Lewis is. He should. Probably part of the problem. He's a hell of a beast. You don't know these guys. He's 6'1", 185, perfect size for a QB. He's a four-star, plays like a five-star. He's small. Yeah, but his game says five-star.

He's a freshman in college or high school right now. What are we doing? So your team that you're so crazy about is not even like a big team. It's not even. You know what? You can't help where you're from or who you love. Okay. And I love who I love.

Isn't that right, Hitchings? Hell yeah, brother. Not you. Love is love. You didn't want to weigh in, Tim? No. Cool. Are you hitting a wall?

Are you still? You really got to be focused on what's under wood. How are you getting home? We can get him to state. I'm not worried about you being drunk or anything, but you're going to need to pee multiple times. He hasn't peed once yet. I know. Impressive.

You're really fixated on it. I never get in a car or a train or a plane without knowing exactly when and where I can pee next. Well, you're old. Tim, you're at least three years older than me. How old are you, Tim? He seems younger. 66.

Wow, you're a beast. At least three years older than me. You're a beast. Are you retired? No. I'm 44. I could be your son. Do you have to take work off today?

I have to pay TJ's college bills. How could I ever retire? Rutgers makes you pay? You charge for Rutgers? Oh, yeah. Out the ass. Wait, did you have to take today off work? Of course.

Drink root beer? That's awesome. He went to college and ended up the producer of the year. Are you proud of TJ? Very proud of TJ. Are you too proud? tj are you too proud how could you be too proud you have kids yeah no i'm not that proud of them yeah you will you will be if you do it right they gotta earn that i mean they are all millionaires

is there anybody at this company that has affected tj's life the most positively and got him out of game time hell and created a career for him? Mark Titus has. Yeah, Mark Titus, I feel like. Anybody here that you need to personally thank? I think Big Cat. Yep, that's the right answer. Thank you, Tim.

You've got to go with a millionaire. You've got to understand that, you know. Not the guy who can't even support his local team. He'd have landed on the yak if he hadn't. He'd have landed a recruit for a couple steps first. He almost ended up in Mississippi because of you. I wasn't. That would have been a great life

for him. We found a nice southern girl. He would have made you some grandkids and it would have been a happy life. I really think if we can get Bryce Underwood to stay, it could change all of our lives.

This is Bryce Underwood. He's It could change all of our lives. This is Bryce Underwood. Monte Waller. He's from Picayune, Mississippi. Well, Picayune's way down the coast. Still, he's going to Florida. Why not keep him in state? It's NIL, man. It's NIL.

Why is he not staying local? First of all, it's Picayune. I think you're investing in the wrong thing. I love how this is going. I don't think you should be investing in the program. I think you should be investing in what's around the program. Give the kids a reason to be in Mississippi. Water slides.

We've got to put a wall around Mississippi. Exactly. Keep them all here. Maybe get a Six Flags in there or some shit. Something that the kids are going to want to do that for. Why would that help get an 18-year-old recruit? They're going to be like, oh, shit, there's a Six Flags in Mississippi State? Right by campus?

You're telling me if I bought the land and put a Six Flags near Starkville, that would help? Right there. If it was right there. Without a doubt, it would help. Six Flags over Mississippi. Are you saying that it wouldn't help? I mean, it can't hurt.

Team gets free passes. I would be very interested. Team gets free passes, free drinks. Yeah. Gotta let the kids party. Free Coca-Colas. Free root beers. Free root beers.

Free high noons. Nobody you want to thank personally, Tim, as we sit here? Titus. I mean, Titus. Not on air. No. I think the Manziel documentary should be a lesson. You've got to let the kids party.

That was tough with Dave getting a picture. Yeah, I know. Where he's like, I was going to party so hard that I was going to shoot myself. I'm in Dave and they're like, yo! Dave gave him a job. That's true. Dave was taking a picture with Johnny Manziel and Johnny Manziel was actively planning his suicide. I don't want to be here.

That was the moment that... Within 30 minutes, he had the barrel of a gun in his mouth. The only person that could save him was his best friend that he scammed people out of autographs with. Oh, poor Uncle Nate. Oh, man. I liked Uncle Nate being like, we had a saying at Texas A&M, win or lose, we still booze. Oh, yeah. That was a real Glenny Ball's Goodfellas moment.

You believe in win or lose, still booze. Hell yeah. That was a real Glenny Ball's Goodfellas moment. Yeah. You believe in win or lose still booze too? How does Johnny look older than Dave there? Is that the picture that they used in the film? No, it was much more

Much more alcohol involved. Much more Johnny dead eyes like I'm going to kill myself too. Yeah. Oof. I liked it

but it did really kind of gloss over like the important part. When he beat the shit out of... No, I was going to say when he's battling depression, suicidal thoughts, they kind of sped past it. Yeah, it did. Yeah.

It kind of came to an end quick. I think it could have been two episodes easily. I didn't watch it. I'm saving it for a back-to-back with the Swamp documentary. It's really good. Why would you save that? I want to watch the Swamp documentary. I want't watch it. I'm saving it for a back-to-back with the Swamp documentary. It's really good. Why would you save that? I want to watch the Swamp documentary. I want to go bang, bang. What's the Swamp? Oh, is that the

new football documentary? Yeah. Florida football, which is going to be better. I had Riley Cooper. Riley Cooper was the team leader. Well, Aaron Hernandez was the team leader. Oh, I know, but that was like Riley Cooper was like the vocal leader. Yeah. Yeah. You can speak to him. He's going to go pee? Oh, he's, but that was like Riley Cooper was like the vocal leader. Yeah. Yeah. You can speak to him.

You going to go pee? Both sides. Oh, he's not peeing. The look of demand. This man is built. He's got to pee. I could use some more ice. Well, Connor Griffin's over there sticking around.

17 up on the official scorecard and counted cans. We're looking at 10 cans. Makes sense. I think that's about right. Because when you drink at a restaurant, it's not a full 12 ounces. Hunter, can I throw a crazy idea at you? Even when you get a... Take that bucket.

What? Fill it up with ice, and then you've got ice in here. I bet you could put back like 40 on a plane. Yeah. They give you a splash. Small ones. They give you a splash. I rode a small plane here yesterday, like a small plane.

CRJ 900. You're flying out of Milwaukee. Was it a Delta Connection? It was a Delta Connection. A CRJ 900? And I could not fit in the bathroom. And I had to pee tremendously. I went and tried once, and just people saw me trying to get in there,

and I couldn't, and I went and sat back down. Then I realized I had to pee so bad. Oh! The soul. People saw me trying to get in there and I couldn't and I went and sat back down. Then I realized I had to pee so bad. That one was big. That scared the shit out of me. Ultimately, I went back in there and I folded myself in and peed. Have you ever not fit in a plane bathroom? Yeah. It's sad.

It's like you did fit though. Not really. My calves are still cramping because I had to bend over. They don't build those things for guys our size. Especially those CRJs. They're not. The CRJ is actually a much more glamorous plane than people assume when you're getting on. Because the seats are way bigger.

Because it's only two seats per row. The seats aren't that bad. But the overhead is like no space at all. Yeah. And the bathroom. Also, every time you're on one of those planes, you're usually only on it for like an hour. Yeah. Did you see that guy? I guess he's like a viral streamer or something

like that who took a Boeing 747 by himself. Are magnets real? Wait, you're talking about Neymar? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's not a streamer. He's a soccer star. A soccer star.

Saudi Prince sent him like a double-decker 747. Yeah. I did a show. Hold on. That looks awesome. That looks great. It's very crisp. I did a show at the stand.

It was awesome. And there was some sort of princess in the back, and they came in with like a shit ton of security and stuff, and then they were like, you're not allowed to look at them or talk to them while you're on stage. You tried to crowd work her? It was like a forbidden.

What did your dad do? As soon as I walked in, they were like, no talking to the people in the back right. That crazy? I'm surprised. I will now be going to the bathroom. Oh, hell yeah. I came back just in time.

Nick, that looks crazy. I feel like she might have used a different shade of white on you than me. Yours is, yeah, yeah. She really watered you down. How are you taking your bag with you? He poops in his bag. He carries around poop. Am I next, or is Stephen Che going right now?

Give me a can. Is Che... How many has he had? Like 17. Jesus Christ. I can't see anything. I feel like that was kind of guaranteed to happen. Why don't you leave that for him to open?

Or just do that for a couple cans. No, don't do that. Don't do that. Why not? He's moments away from achieving a massive goal. DJ, I know it's your dad, but you agree we should definitely do that for a couple of these cans, right? Yeah, shenanigans are on the table here. Yeah. Nicky smokes

prank. There's Che. Hey, Che. Is he busy now? I don't know. He seems like he's doing manual labor today. He's in moving mode. His shoulders are slumped. He's doing manual labor today. He's in moving mode. He's going upstairs. Running. He's going upstairs to yell at someone.

Hey, I just met you. You guys are such assholes. Don't. Not. Don't. Don't. I'm going to take a fucking shit. I'm going to snitch. Don't you fucking snitch, bitch.

I'm going to snitch. You are a snitch. Went to the bathroom. You looking for the ice man? Yeah, he's in the bathroom. Just throw that in there. Top him off. Oh.

And your bear has hands on his eyes? I have clean hands. What do you think is happening in restaurants, dude? There's something down their pants. Sass, why are you standing up? He's got a dump. Who's going to go tell him next? Are you going, Roan, or am I?

You going to go tell him in the bathroom? I can go. I can go. I thought Stephen Che just went, but he just went upstairs. Oh, Stephen Che what? Oh, okay. Che's upstairs. No, he's coming right down now.

Stephen, are you going? Are you going or should I? Yeah, Roan can go if you're not ready. Does Che know the music? I'm going to take a piss too. Can you read the mattress format? I don't think he should know. Can you read theirm ad? Of course I can read the Mattress Firm ad. Nobody reads about Mattress Firm better than me.

You're the best at it. My God, I love Mattress Firm. Yes. Everyone needs quality sleep to feel restored and to function at their best. To achieve this, you know how you do it, Rone? How? Have the right mattress. Yep.

The right mattress matters. Luckily, Mattress Firm is here to help. Their sleep experts receive over 200 hours of sleep training oh how does that work 200 hours of sleep training it's an intensive mattress firm process that they uh that they it's i mean everybody gets it but it's fun and informative train them helps helps you helps match you with the bright mattress embedding accessories for your needs with their low price guarantee you can be confident that you'll find your perfect mattress at the best price. And if you're not totally satisfied, after 120 nights, they'll pair you with a new one.

Visit a store near you or go to mattressfirm.com. The right mattress matters. Mattress Firm will find yours. Hell of a tag like the kind that you don't rip off of a mattress. True. Don't ever rip them off. It's illegal. It's illegal.

You go to jail for that. Jails are overcrowded with people who ripped off mattress tags. That's what my dad first went in for. No, he was using the tag to roll... Yes. Yep. Math cigarettes.

To roll drugs. Okay, I'm going to go get my face painted. Okay, well, we're almost down. Everybody going to leave? I mean, Stephen Chay's giving me military hand signals to go get my face painted. Okay, well, we're almost down. Everybody going to leave? I mean, Stephen Chay has given me military hand signals to go do it. Yeah, and he has our phone numbers. Drives me nuts. He did this for me when I was last Friday for Wheel.

Yeah, what did that mean? Wheel. Oh, I see. This. Or text. I kind of like this for Wheel. He always does this one, too. What does that mean? Wheel. Oh, I see. This. Text. I kind of like this for a wheel. He always does this one, too.

What does that mean? That's the ad. That's the read the ad. Oh, ad. Hey, big cat. Hey, guys. Roan left to get his face painted. Sass went to the bathroom.

Was there an outfit change? Yeah, did you change outfits? Hey, what the fuck? What is that? I got tired of the other shirt. That's fair. That's why you took the bag in there. Yeah, you don't have to be dirty or sweaty to change shirts. Yeah, just get tired of it.

Your face paint looks awesome. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah, it's the coolest I've ever looked. Yeah. What are you going to do driving home? Are you going to have to take stops? My wife drives. looked. Yeah. What are you going to do driving home? Are you going to have to take stops? My wife drives.

Everywhere? Yeah. How come y'all shit on me? You sit shotgun everywhere? She doesn't like my driving. I can say the L word. I can say the L word. I've been married 17 years.

I've sat in a car my wife drove one time in 17 years. Maybe not even. You're in a progressive relationship. Plus, you've had a lot of root beers. Don't want a mug shot. How can you say that? TJ, what do you think about this? When you were a kid, your mom was driving?

He's a lot more patient than she is. Oh. So you do drive like a bitch. No, it's either he drives. Oh, I see. He doesn't want her yelling at him when he's driving. Right. She's just like, all right, you drive.

Okay. Got it. Okay, we get it now. It works for everybody. Oh, except your dad's mom. My mom doesn't trust the GPS yet. What do you mean she doesn't trust? You get to tweet everywhere.

It's great. Wait, what do you mean your mom doesn't trust the GPS? Well, put the navigation in the GPS and it'll tell us the fastest route. And she'll be like, yeah, I'm not going that way. She argues over it. I like his mom better than I like his dad. I'm just going to say that. I like just being like, I don't trust this computer that is literally built to get me somewhere fast. Fuck this.

Remember having to print out MapQuest? Yes. That was the best. Does it have nine pages? Yeah. That was the best. Just have nine pages of... Yeah, just... You remember Triple A Triptychs? I don't remember that. It actually came on a little binder.

I remember that. I vividly remember my dad having a huge actual map when we would go on road trips as kids and just being like, how the fuck are they doing this? If you think about how GPS guides us and how we get places now, how did people get somewhere in 1985?

We would stop to get gas and he would hold out the map and just be like, alright, I gotta take this to this to this. We would get lost a lot. I remember family parties always getting lost. I'd go to see relatives out in the... Yeah. That's crazy.

I guess we were a lot smarter. Then the garments. Everyone was super pumped about the garments. Little sandbags, putting them on the... We had a TomTom. I knew you. Of course you were a TomTom. Homer Simpson voice.

You could put different voices on it. Oh, yeah. Did Homer Simpson? Schwarzenegger. Oh, I like that. I didn't know you could do that. Dana! Come in here. Oh, I like that. I didn't know you could do that. Dana! Come in here.

Oh, haircut. Looking good, bro. Come say hi. Sit down. Fresh cut. No, we're not. We're this Thursday's episode. What's up, friends?

What's up, Tim? Hey, Dana. How are you? He's chirped me online before. This is the only thing he ever remembers about me, and I've been guilty ever since. He's said a lot of nice things. Him chirps at me all the time.

He's said a lot of nice things. What did he say that was mean? I forget. He's just brutally honest, you know? Yeah. Oh, he's off. He's drank 17 rupees. Yeah, he's off the A&W.

Yeah, right now he's a little wild. You just now noticed him. I mean, he doesn't have anything on. I didn't look at you guys. Why would you? What's going on? Are you guys doing a case race? Yeah.

Seven. You want to make a guest appearance during it? I'm not going to be here, but. You're not working Viva Hours tonight? I'm not working Viva Hours. Why? I finished my video early, so I'm going to go home and eat some food, you know? Nice.

Where are you living these days i live on long island still at the yeah come on is rent good out there i don't pay a single cent yeah i know you had to help out yet yeah i do yard work that's. That's not true. I don't do any yard work. I take the trash out. Okay. Has there been a moment where your girlfriend's dad's like, hey, can you help? No. Dude, I'm very like, I proactively am like, yo, can I do anything to help?

And they're always like, no, you're good. You're saving a shit ton of money. Yes. Yeah. It's got to be amazing. It's awesome. I haven't seen you guys in a while on the act, but thanks for having me. I miss you, man.

What if you just lived at your girlfriend's parents' house, saved a shitload of money, and then broke up with her? That'd be so hard. Save up money for a house and then dump her. Stop, dude. Come on. This isn't live. What?

Kind of a good idea. Oh, she's lovely Good for you Dana I'm happy you're doing well He's a means to an end brother You look good You're really big I saw you broke the record

Saturday beers I'm on Ozempic For real? How's it going? It's not bad I mean I think I've gained weight How many calories are in Ozempic? Wait when did you start?

You took a breath. It's only been a couple weeks. Turns out it makes your clothes smaller. Did it do anything to you? I'm on a very low dose right now, so I haven't noticed anything. So did it make you feel sick? No, no. I might do it.

I haven't felt sick, but I've definitely noticed that my appetite at certain points just kind of makes me not want to eat as much. You power through it? Yes, that's the problem. Yeah, right. I just eat through the Ozempic. Right, I feel like I can beat Ozempic. Are you injecting it?

So big. In your butt? In my tummy. No. You can tell. You're doing it just for weight loss? Yeah. Does it hurt?

No, it's just a tiny needle. I'm probably going to have people... What? Now they're going to freak me out about side effects. What are the side effects? Nothing so far. I don't understand when people say that about side effects. Isn't it like the most dangerous thing to be overweight?

Like, if you get skinny, that's good. Thank you. Mr. 272, we don't need that. People say, like, loss of motivation, but you already live at your girlfriend's parents. What's going to happen? Oh, shit. That's good. That's good.

Will you let me know how it goes? I will. I'm three weeks in, and I've dropped like four pounds. Are you worried about getting too hot? Yeah. What? Are you worried about getting too hot? Yeah.

I want to stop using nicotine, too. I feel like it will stop that. Stop drinking coffee, which... Come on, dude. What the fuck? Why are you stopping using nicotine? That was dumb. No, sorry.

Not that. We're now even for the master plan of saving all that money. Yeah, no. You can chart me as much as you want. You guys drinking beer? What time are you guys drinking beers? He's drinking root beers. As soon as I leave.

He's drank 18. Are you serious? Yes. That's, wait, really? Yeah. I didn't know that was happening. 18 glasses. So like 13, no, 12 full root beers.

All right, Tim. Was that a Cheesecake Factory in what, 1998? 2000. He said 10 years ago. 2013. 2013, you drank how many? 19. A lot.

TJ was alive in the 90s? I don't know. I'm not giving you numbers. How old are you, TJ? 24? 26. 26. Oh, fuck, I guess he was. Wait, so what else is going. How old are you, TJ? 24? 26. 26. Oh, fuck.

I guess he was. Wait, so what else is going on? What are you working on? Are you doing some travel videos? Yeah, I'm doing a lot of, I'm basically doing a lot of like back-to-back Saturday, Sunday tailgate videos. Oh. Which is going to be rough.

Tell me the schedule. I'm going to the Bussin Bowl. I'm going to. You'll be there? I'm going to a lot of Monday Night Football games like a Lions Monday Night Football Jaguars Monday Night Football you should sit with

Detroit Town and Superfan I can't I can't why that's magic dude but still I'll never touch that dude

that is like gold that should not be touched they would love to have you I know but that's you gotta go back and make that history what week is that

it's like middle of October or something we should talk maybe i will yeah are you gonna go to uh eagles dolphins i think that's monday no i'm going to cowboys the eagles which is fucking that's gonna be a shit show and then i just started uh i sent an email the other day i'm trying to get a basketball hard knocks in new york the new york office so what do you mean i want to to head up the production of that. What team?

Like a Barstool basketball team. We did that. Yeah, I know, like years ago. But now we have way more cameramen than we did in 2018. So who's going to be on the team? We're going to suck, dude. We're going to be awful. I was going to say you have to play.

Yeah, I'm going to play, but I'm also going to edit it. So it's like I'm doing a little bit of both. Just like a, yeah. You got to get DiGiulio. Yeah, DiGiulio's a grind. Are you, yeah, are you going to get content people? Or are you going to get? So you.

There's going to be a content team and a production team. Production team will win. Yes. We suck. Edwin's very good. Yeah. He actually texted me and he was like pissed. He's like, I want to be on your team.

And I was like, I want to have a bad team. Right. So who else is going to be? Is Clemmer? Yeah, Clemmer. I want Joey to play. Oh, no. Pat's playing.

Pat's good. Pat's good, yeah. Marty. Obviously. Rico. Rico. I think it'll be good. I've always wanted to do that.

That's my passion. Basketball. Basketball's my passion. All right, I'm... Only you had a... Nothing else. Office. I'm getting boring. I'm. Basketball is my passion. All right, I'm – Only you had a – Nothing else. Yeah. Office.

I'm getting boring. I'm getting boring. You're not. Only you had an office with a court. Yeah. Basketball court. You did invite me. Yeah, I did.

Pretty early on. I can't beat free rent. It would be a long commute for you. I can't beat free rent. That's a game changer. There's other factors involved, you know. That's all right. What? How do you have free rent. That's a game changer. There's other factors involved, you know? That's a free rent. What?

How do you have free rent? Oh, you missed it. We're roasting me. I live at my girlfriend's parents' house. Oh, shit. Yeah. Ugh. Come on.

They're wonderful people. Where's your girlfriend? That sounds like worst case scenario. No, dude. We have our own little, like, area. That sounds like something went wrong. We have our own. I'd hope you'd have your own bedroom.

We have our own area. What the fuck? No, like our whole, we got a back room. You got the bunk beds. You got the bottom. Do you get good dinners every night? No, we usually- Dinner's ready.

We usually eat out, yeah. Oh, that'd be awesome. We got a yard. Yeah, we got dogs. Dinner. Before it gets cold, Dana. Your vegetables. That would suck if you got grounded.

It actually is a testament to the parents because the idea of you living in my house. Well, actually, a funny story. You've made it in life. You have a nice home. Get into retirement age, and then Dana shows up. Hey, guys. All right, so me and her dad are pretty

tight and I remember a funny story once was like he just started watching Barstool stuff because of me and it was the dozen and we were playing you and he started off on the big screen it's the three of us and he just goes there's the king of blowjobs. He had the same question?

Was he like giving or taking? Silent. Oh, no. That was tough. That's all right. Then they get numb to it. Yeah, then they get numb to it. Yeah.

It just becomes whatever. All right. See you, Dana. All right, miss you, Dana. Good seeing you, Tim. Good seeing you. Hi, Dana. Let's take the beers, everyone.

He's top three for making me laugh. Yeah, he's so funny. He's a funny guy. We should have had him on the case race. Oh, yeah. He said that he's got to go home. His word count from the last one was, I think, like five. Yeah.

He's got to go home and do some yard work. Why are you quitting nicotine? I was just, he's on Ozempic. Oh, really? So I was asking him questions because I'm thinking about doing it. I'm trying to he's on Ozempic. Oh, really? So I was asking him questions because I'm thinking about doing it. I'm trying to diet the right way right now, but I was thinking about

how one of the side effects or one of the cravings would be nice. And quitting nicotine, people normally gain weight when they quit. Right. Yeah.

David Tell has a joke where he's talking about child porn and how pedophiles say it's an addiction. He's like, it's similar to smoking. And he's like, well, I smoke a pack and a half a day. He's like, I don't really know what that translates to in boy. And then he's like, if I quit, am I going to gain weight?

It's a very funny bit. That was awkward. I think I lost you guys at the child porn. Were you happy through that? I didn't see it coming, I gotta say. Funny joke, though. It is. Does that translate to in boy?

Where did Rico go? He was never on this episode. Yeah, he wasn't on this episode. So he's just sitting out there with face paint on? Yeah. Should we spin the wheel? Yeah, let's do it. Getting close to the 20 mark.

What should we actually... I'm like so impressed by this. It's 13 cans he's done. Holy shit. That's so much. That is so much soda. 13 cans. That's awful. That's done. Holy shit. That's so much soda. That is so much soda. 13 cans. That's awful.

That's 20. You want to get to 14 cans? You want to finish one more can? Whatever you want. Okay. You're a beer guy, too. What's the most beers you ever put back, you think? Fuck, man.

Not this many. Not this many, yeah. What's happening? We've definitely had 13 Let's go 15 Oh absolutely I think 15 cans is a good amount So we'll do two more cans Good job

The worst possible way to do that I didn't want to use my hands He used your hands when he wasn't that. I didn't want to use my hands. He used your hands when he wasn't in here. He didn't see me use my hands. Did you wash your hands? He said he has clean hands. Today I have washed my hands, yes. And have you peed since then?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, for sure. Did you wash your hands? At some point today I washed my hands. Damage is already done. You already drank all of it. You already had 20 root beers. You went to go pee.

A little pee hand. I already put the ice in. Really? Yeah. Okay. It's fine. Come on. My penis is clean.

Let's see. Nuh-uh. Oh, what I heard? Oh, shit. I heard you had a dirty, dirty. Dirty. True. That's true.

But it's not a flare-up right now. No, no, no. It's just muddy. You can't settle down after you put them back in the cooler? Oh, look at this. He's stone-colding them. Woo. That's 20.

Jesus. So this will be, he will have drank 15 cans of. Holy shit. Now, Tim, you said you want, your dream is to have a wet wheel today. Yeah, I brought clothes, just in case. Which you've already changed. Why don't you change again? This will be the

best Carbone group. Yeah. I had enough clothes so that if I went to the bathroom 15 times I would have a new outfit. Love that. Alright. Come on, I would have a new outfit. Oh. Love that. I love it. All right.

Come on, Tim. Come on, Tim. He's been hoping for it every day. Oh, oh, oh. Oh. Hey. Are you kidding? Tim.

All right. He did it. That's incredible. He's literally been tweeting about it every day. Oh, boy. Should we just give it to him? Yeah, so we just. Dana's on it. Dana's on it. Dana's on it. Should we give it to Tim? Go get Dana. Oh, boy. Should we just give it to him? Yeah, so we just... Dana's on it.

Dana's on it. Can we give it to Tim? Go get Dana. Go get Kelly. Go get Kelly. That's right. Go get Kelly. Oh.

All right. You just made me so happy. Thank you. Oh, I'm happy. I'm happy that you're happy. Although I did have some name wheel stuff as well. Oh. Just in case.

You got your own? Your own slivers? Absolutely. Can you drop a couple? No. Okay. He's got to save it for next time. Okay, next time.

TJ has them. Fair enough. Fair enough. All right, who else was on the show today? He's got 20 root beers. Dana. It's just Dana and Jay. Just Dana and Kelly, right?

Yep. Make sure Jay's on there. This is going to suck if someone who got their face painted has to get wet. I just don't know what I'm going to do. I hope I get wet for the group. I hope I get wet for the group. I hope I get wet for the group. Yeah, I hope you get wet for the group.

All right, TJ. Question, and I love her. I don't want to do this. Is Mrs. Hitchings on the wheel? Oh, yes. She's saying yes. Thumbs is Mrs. Hitchings on the wheel? Oh, yes, she's saying yes. Thumbs up. The Hitchings are the best. Okay.

They're the best. They're all in. They're ride or die. All right, TJ, you want to start the spinning? I think you can, if you get it, you can get your body, not your face. I can champion for my mom. Okay. Well, she's the one that raised her hand.

Connor, would you like to champion for anyone? I would do. Okay. Who can champion for me? I'll do whoever. Can we champion for people when our name's on there twice? Yeah. No, but if Connor would like to take it for someone who has face pain, he can.

All right. Oh, just put a bag over her head. Ellie's going to be so mad if she gets it. What is she going to do? What color am I? I cannot see that far. Blue. Which blue?

Royal blue. Dark. Royal. I'm so happy you got this, Tim. I saw you tweeting. You're the royal blue. Two weeks Tim was tweeting. Yeah, but now the odds are terrible.

I can actually do this. Oh, man, I would have gotten wet too. Would have loved to. Would have loved to. Painted. Shit, guys. I was complaining how dry you were. I was.

All that mud and muck off your penis. It sucks. Don't. BJ. No man should see his son get wet. Who's dad? It's me. Oh my word.

What the fuck, dude? What is that? What is that? It's just a fucking team face. Did you not know she wasn is that? Shrek. What is that? It's just a fucking pink face. She got awesome. Did you not know she wasn't giving you Shrek? Dude, you're going to get green screened. We should have a whole movie playing.

Oh, yeah. Wait, yeah. Your face paint should be the entire Shawshank Redemption. MLB highlights. Ron, you look really, and I mean this as a friend,an you look really and I mean this as a friend like you look really good green yeah you do it does something for you you feeling okay

oh man you just got off the coast rollercoaster oh no oh no oh no Oh, my God. Holy fuck. Oh, no. You had so many colors.

That was so fast from TJ. Oh, my God. TJ, do you have a shortcut for that? You can auto-key out green and that's the default. Oh my god. Oh fuck.

See a replay of that? I have a feeling you will. It's funny, Sass, because I got you back, brother, if you want to play that game. Oh, yeah. That's true, brother. Yeah, that's true. No CGI.

You got wet wheel. Perfect. Yeah, Tim was so happy. He was so happy. Perfect for me. Okay. Oh, man. I was going to order a bagel.

Bagel? I just had a turkey sandwich with a kaiser roll. Soak that shit up. Kill for a bagel. Oh, Kelly knows that she's on it. Sassy, way to be, boy. Proud of you, Sassy. Where are you going?

What? Why? We got wet wheel. Just wait two seconds. Wait. Dana is safe. She's literally standing up in there. Look at that.

No one's even sitting. They're looking at him. It's five on the dot right now. You want anything, Rowan? You good? Just kill for a bagel. You want one, Seth? Oh, yeah, sure.

I was looking after my teammate. What do you want? You want bacon, egg, and cheese? Sure. Oh, shit. It's closed. Relax. Kelly.

Where to be Kelly? Soft. She would have. She would have. She said, I will take the punishment for all New York fans. Damn, you're out. Ah, damn. It would count as drinking one if you pour one on your head. I should have had extra slices on there as a guest.

You can volunteer as tribute if Sask gets it. I'll volunteer if my wife gets it. That's what I'll do. There she is. I just want to ride home. Where do we go now? Where do ride home. Where do we go now? Where do we go? Where do we go now?

Hi, Brandon. Sweet child. Sweet child. I'm like the mask. Yeah, you look like the mask. All right, so it's going to be me or Za. Wow. Baby, calm down.

Za, traditionally known as the driest in the office. It was the first ever driest. I don't think I'm ever going to get wet again. No backup, please. So you know that means I'm getting wet. It's a score right now. 1-0, Zah. Oh, no, Roan.

Baby, you're coming out. So what should I do? Plastic bag overhead? Plastic bag overhead. I am. Okay, 1-1. Plastic bag overhead. Take your shoes off, Roan.

It's over. Plastic bag overhead. I'm going to change shirts for the wet wheel and then change back into the shirt. You're going to get green all over that shirt, though. That's when we're changing out. You take it off. Yeah. I might be able to widen it.

I like how mine is green, though. That's apropos to the one, but I know how that should go. Yeah, you never want the 2-1 lead, ever. Worst lead in sports. Ja, my brother. What are you at? Going to the bathroom? Dangerous.

It's dangerous. Look at that stack of cans. Is the score right now? 3-1 me, so. All right, let's go Roan. Let's go Roan. No, no, Zaha. I do not trust Zaha coming back.

Oh, shit. Here it comes. That fucking 3-1. God damn it. Here it comes. God bless America. Do you want to go four? Want to shout out the troops?

Want four or do you want? Shout out to the troops. Shout out to the troops. Smartest guys we got. Fuck. All right, guys we got. Fuck. All right, 3-3. Wait. Oh, wrong.

I don't want to see my boy have to do this before we got to compete in the arena. Where's a plastic bag I could throw over my head? It's got to be. Yeah. Oh, no. What a comeback Wow Oh Roan

Yak shirt One of those shirts in there What about the bucket You don't have to get your hair Just get your body You put the bucket over your head Your body Bye Adam The green really is flattering on him He looks great I don't know how to help. Bye, Adam.

The green really is flattering on him. He looks great. He looks great green. I feel bad I keep coughing. I think I have like an asthma. Oh! Did Brandon just fall? Was that?

Going in with a purpose. Is this our last show in studio with one another? Case race will be. Oh, yeah. I forgot about that in an hour. So that'll be a lot of emotion dumping? Sure. I'm very excited that Rico is part of this.

Yeah. What are we going to play once we're drunk? Salad Bowl? I think we do... Celebrity Guesser? Yeah. Celebrity Guesser. We'll get it? Salad Bowl? I think we do... Celebrity Guesser? Yeah. Celebrity Guesser. We'll get it.

Salad Bowl's a good time, though. We should play one round of Salad Bowl. It is fun. Yeah, I'd love to see Rico. Oh, yeah. I want to just watch him do everything. Mm-hmm. Agreed.

What are we zooming in on? I think Frank's on deck. Oh, wow. Roan got in there. Roan. Roan got in there. Roan. Roan got in there right on time. Holy shit. Oh, no, he's not even in there yet.

He's holding them up. Smart. I'm very happy. Did he? I'm happy that Tim got that. He wanted that so bad. He experienced the rush of it. He was tweeting all week saying that he's hoping there's no wet wheel.

Part of me was like, we should have a medic on hand. That's a lot of root beer. He doesn't seem phased in any way. I think he's been sneaking RBs behind the wife's back every once in a while. That's an experienced root beer. Look at that. He's not generally a quantity guy either.

He drinks beer, but it's usually one or two beers and then he's good. He's like a quality craft beer guy. It's just for the taste. He's not a quantity guy either. He drinks beer, but it's usually one or two beers, and then he's good. Yeah, he's like a quality craft beer guy. He's just for the taste. He's not drinking to get hammered. My goodness. 15. 15 cans.

When he pulls out the 15 RB, you got to take note. 15 cans. That's an insane amount of root beer. He's got one to finish to get 15 full cans. He just did another costume change. He's just doing free promo. How much did Buddha Ben pay you? We now know what's happening.

Do you have every piece he's put out? Not quite. I like that one. All right, so if you finish this, then you have officially drank 15 cans, 22 root beers is what we're calling it. That's impressive. And I can go? And then you can go.

Then you can go. You got your wet wheel. I'm happy you did. I'm happy. I wanted to get wet. The clinking of the glass has been a nice relaxing sound. It is. It's a good sound.

Yeah, it's good. Nice little... Is there any wisdom or anything you'd like to impart on us? About drinking root beer? About you've hit your goal? I don't know. TJ's an impressive guy. I feel like you guys have done good.

So far. So far. So far. What about me? Do you feel a little bad that every time... You're going to have a great basketball team. All right, so the football team's not going to win anything. That was what that was.

That was what that was. Do you feel a little bit hurt that every time this conference realignment comes up, you guys are used as the, Oregon's got to go to Piscataway? That's always the conversation. Could you imagine Washington playing Rutgers. That's always the conversation. Could you imagine Washington playing Rutgers? It's disdain. Does it hurt you?

Yeah, of course it hurts. There's nothing you can do about it. Yeah, you're... Until they come in and play, and we'll see what happens. Well, they'll probably win. Can't win every game. Usually those teams win every game against Rutgers. Yeah. I will say this.

If Rutgers ever gets good again, like, it is my nightmare for Wisconsin to lose in football to Rutgers because I know that, like, even though we beat you every single time we play, if you win one, then TJ's got that over me forever. Yeah, that's my dream. Yeah, right. Absolutely.

Yeah, no, I dread that. Watching you right. Absolutely. No, I dread that. Watching you suffer a little. Yeah, I dread that. I dread that. It's like Purdue fans. Because we know you're going to put money on it too, right? Yeah. Shit.

A lot of money. Yeah. That's coming out of TJ's salary. Right. It's the new barstool. TJ gets paid? TJ gets paid. Oh.

What, you're not getting good gifts from TJ? Not really. What the fuck? He got you an arcade machine. What the fuck? He got you an arcade machine? He got this hat. That's a good hat.

That's a good hat. It's a great hat. DJ, did you use your discount to get that hat? No, I didn't even know that we actually had that until that email got sent out to us. Oh, wow. We have a discount? Yeah, they changed the code. Is that, did they give us the 30% discount because they're taking away all of our benefits and everything now? Everything's gone. Oh, wow. We have a discount? Yeah, they changed the code. Is that, did they give us the 30% discount

because they're taking away all of our benefits and everything now? Everything's gone. Everything is... Oh, my God. Patrick Bateman over here. You look like American Psycho.

He is soaking wet. Yeah, he's the wettest. Oh, fuck. That's rules. Have you been lifting the wettest. Sopping. Oh, fuck. That's rules. Oh, and have you been lifting or something? His body looks great. You look awesome, dude. Is that yoga?

Pilates? Have you been doing Pilates? No, it's a wet shirt. You look awesome. I noticed it in a Pat Bev clip. His arms look big. The shirt getting wet is really what does it. I have no backup clothes.

I can give you some. It's okay. I have no backup clothes. I can give you some. It's okay. All right, Tim. Chug that beer and root beer and then we bid you adieu. 15 cans. This man drank 15 cans. Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug.

And that's 50 group beers. What a hero. Are you disappointed that I didn't throw up? I thought you were just going to there. I actually never thought you'd throw up. I really didn't. I did. I've changed my opinion of you.

You're a winner. No, you've been a winner for me for months. We've had that conversation. Not personally, but I've heard it on the air. I think I said that. Maybe I said it to your wife. She and I talk all the time. All the time. She drives me around.

I made it on the Christmas card. You did. You're a winner. You've got to get another one for this year's Christmas card. Oh, yeah. Maybe today. Yeah. Well, Tim, any last words?

Thank you very much. I appreciate the honor and the privilege. You're a good hang. Very good hang. This was legendary. I want to do five more cans right now just for the shit of it. You want me to leave you with some root beer? Are you thirsty?

No, no. I just didn't know if I call your call all right well tim thank you thank you one of the last yaks you've ever done in this studio it was it was a pleasure having you in here appreciate it hope to see you in the new studio yes absolutely you're always welcome always welcome thank you all right we'll see everyone for the case race on friday please like and subscribe see you tomorrow. Bye, we love you all.