The Yak - We're Going Through Barstool to Figure Out What People Do Here | The Yak 2-27-25

Episode Date: February 27, 2025

Big Cat is back and pranking BrandonYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. I'm the coolest one out of all of us. That was incredible. Hello, it's the Yak. Welcome in. Robak.com promo code Yak. 20% off your first purchase. Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts.

Robak.com promo code Yak. I'm wearing Robak head to toe right now. shorts, Roeback.com promo code YAC. I'm wearing Roeback head to toe right now. Looking good. Roeback.com promo code YAC. It is Combine Day. We'll be live after the YAC. Lucas is here on the sticks. We wanted to give him a call.

Text him. Call him. And we were starting to talk right before the show went live, which we should have saved it, but I think we should become a Doge committee and see what everyone does here because we don't know We don't know I don't say any names, but we were like what do they do and you're like, what does Dawson do? Right. Yeah, I'm talking about Dawson. Oh, yeah. I want like a About his big plumber ass, right? I'm interested in what's his job title. It's concise, but succinct. Can anybody really answer what he does?

I'm not saying this is a joke What does he do wait can we have people come in front of us and we guess? What we think they do yeah, I think we're gonna know but I him I don't I think you come down here And we do the the doge What for say four things you've done what it yeah and Dawson is specifically, I'm very interested in because I, over the summer, I think his sister might live on my block and I was walking Stella and she's like, oh, my brother Dawson works at Barstool.

He loves his job and I was like, oh yeah. Cool. Okay. I've bumped into people in Dawson's web many a time in many different places. Yeah. He's a, he's a man about town spread far. Yes. You also, if you ever want to meet the TCU chancellor, he's got him. Oh, he's got it locked down at TCU. Does anyone have Dawson's phone number? No, I don't. He's anybody have

Dawson's last name. I don't know. It was TCU. Yeah. Dawson, Dawson. Hey Hank, do you have Dawson's phone number? I don't think Hank would work with Dawson. Sorry Mike. Dawson might be the smartest guy in the world. Do you work with Dawson? I don't know. The guy up there he said. Does he work here?

What if he's Dalton from Roadhouse and he's just got the one name? Dawson does have a fat ass. And I say that with all due respect. Oh How'd we get on Dawson yeah, how do you get it don't worry about it we were We saw him. How do you just saw him find it? We saw him we were talking about something Oh, no, we're talking about hot guys in the office. Yeah I was like did you guys say Dawson we blame Blake Blake is Like is yeah

Did you guys say me too? No, all right, that's enough. I like too much. She's getting liberal with the button No offense or no opposite Lucas is big time in his villain arc right now. Yeah, he's found Someone in tate that will do anything and he's gonna push that to the brink of death You can just feel it. I know Jerry was saying the chat was getting to him. I think Lucas was complicit. Yeah. Yeah He just loves watching Torture you got from who is that his phone? Oh Lucas was complicit as well. Yeah, he just loves watching torture. From who? Is that his phone?

Oh, you were holding up your phone. All right, text him and tell him to come on the act. He was even in the state right now? No, I saw him today. Oh, you did? Yeah. Oh, nice. That's why I said about him,

he's the type of guy that shows up exactly when you've forgotten he exists. And I got reminded that he's here He is here. That's such a great place to live Yeah, because you never say oh what the fuck's Dawson doing the only time I talked to Dawson He like will come up to me and be like hey The vice president TCU wanted to get a tour is that cool? Okay, I also for five years have been begging day Portnoy to take the college football show to Starkville

with no results. Dawson just got it done for TCU. Well, they did give us a great spot. You could get a great spot anywhere. Yeah, but he gave us a great spot. And he offered to take us to the game and sit in the chancellor's box. We denied that.

He had access to the chancellor box? I want to get in the chancellor box so bad. Is that his job? I think he played for TCU. He did. He did. He played football for TCU? He's the long snapper? He got Max Duggan in the building a couple years ago.

Was that the quarterback's name? I don't even remember. Yeah, Max Duggan. Yeah, he got him in the building a couple years ago. Yeah, he's just our point of contact for TCU. He's at lunch. Huh. Sounds important. He gets a lunch? Huh, sounds important. He gets a lunch? He does get a lunch.

Damn. All right. Dawson. Swing's a big dick. How were the selections that you guys got that McKenzie picked last two? You missed a worse nickname than Zant, Vanny Zakhed. Yeah.

Vanny Zakhed fucked me up for a day. There's one more. We found worse. Oh, no. We found a worse one. What is it? Okay, call this guy the Doberman Because his last name starts with n You know like doberman Lesson start with n so she called him the Doberman the Doberman with two n's

What's he's also a lawyer? He's also a lawyer Brad's a lawyer over men in If he was a law if he was a law billboard like the Doberman, but he was the Doberman Doberman Doberman and then the Doberman What yeah, it's yeah, I made sense. I'm not real sure what you're not getting had to be here the Doberman in What yes? I'm not real sure what you're not getting. Had to be here. The Doberman-in. What? Yeah. Doberman. Also, one of the guys from the first thing who didn't make it

at all but loved the guy, DJ Decadence. He made us a sick intro with a beat drop and everything. Did you ever tell us about DJ Decadence? Yeah, when you sent that text last night, I was like, who is DJ Decadence? I've never heard DJ Decadence. It's almost like no one was paying attention to my first lengthy slideshow

He was at the very end of the first slideshow I was like highlighted like the dude who made a lamp out of his transmission you mean the nuclear power plant Yeah, that's oh, yeah, I was checked that way I eternal sunshine to forget that day. Okay. Well, was a DJ there, and I was like hey Maybe you could make us a sick a sick like intro and last night you tweeted He was like do you have it? Yeah? Oh, I? Retweeted I retweeted it yeah, Lucas go ahead pull that up No rush Lucas instead of focus on

I know he is pretty Why didn't Mackenzie pick him? She never got him. He never made it. He was on the up and up, and now I'm not quite sure, but it would be fun for him to finish it for us. Look at those eyes. Look at those eyes.

Wait, it's just him making it? But wait, it turns into the act theme song in a second. This guy is everything Cody thinks he is. Yes, that's what Cody wants to be. Cody thinks he looks like when he does his moves. We just upgraded our Cody. Yep, new Cody. Oh, that looks sick.

Decadence. DJ Decadence, yeah. Very handsome. Kind of crave him. Better. Yeah. That's Cody wants to be that. And he never will.

Literally is. Never will. He's pulling it off somehow. Yeah. Every time, I've seen Cody do these moves and I've cringed every time. This isn't cringy. Yeah, DJ Jackson says it and you said it perfectly.

He's craveable. He is. Craveable. Wow. Want more. He left me wanting a lot more. Can we get him into the final? Golden buzzer, Kyle. I want him as more can we get him into the final golden buzzer? I want him as a golden buzzer you want a golden buzzer. Yes, okay?

Let's go oh my goodness easy pick that was so I want him around All right, we might just make this an arranged marriage. Yep, you're in even having a speaking role though I want to just create sounds. Do his things. Move how he would. Well maybe, like, he can be in the background with his tables and if one of the guys messes up he can be like wekka wekka wekka wekka, you know what I mean? If he could do that.

He could pull that. He could pull that. Take it. Yeah. Okay. We were talking yesterday just having a house DJ just over there all day. That would be, that would mean the whole thing.

That wouldn't piss anyone off. Oh fuck. Oh god. I just see the dream right now. This is the last straw you guys embarrassed me for the last time Also Chicago's corrupt fire Brandon Johnson. Yes also come to John Boyd this weekend That's right, He would be terroristic. I would never do that Dante. No He is our house DJ. We should have DJ Fridays. That'll be awesome. Yeah, you'll do that. He's here right now We really should have DJ Fridays. He's interviewing. Well we had a DJ in the top 20 so we could have that DJ We could have DJ Decadence

Assuming that's how it's pronounced. I doubt it. Okay. Okay. I'm gonna text. Who knows? Doberman. Doberman. But the Doberman's coming in. He's part of the group that made it. Were you here for Limbo Pete? Limbo Pete you got, right? And who was the one that won the other day? Tall man. Oh, baseball player. Connor Bing. Any of these men. Chandler Bing. Chandler Bing. Chandler B. From 6 six or seven and the savannah bananas are getting cancelled right now Oh Cancel people are just really jumping on top of them like this is stupid and everybody's just deciding they're getting turned on turned on that's Yeah, yeah, yeah cancel corny happens hit with the corny. Yeah. Yeah, like this is a people are being really mean about it

Though no people have had a mean week online It's just not yeah, it's a mean place. It isn't funny, and it deserves maybe some negative feedback, but it's not for us either Yeah, don't why don't people have the ability to be like I'm not the target demo are so right past why didn't this make? Big laugh yeah, this was funny at all this kids movie. I saw yeah, not funny. I did that with the old miss story I hope you guys didn't talk about it I didn't yeah, I literally saw it, and I was just like yeah, I'm too old and this is kind of too fucked up Yeah, no questions sitting it out. It's fine to sit shit out. Yeah, totally fine. I said it didn't pass the smell test nope Find shit don't need to be involved in this one Yeah, all right, so Dante will come down

What I can see he's in has any of the men reached out to you The qualifiers a couple the one of the guys that didn't make it remember he owns a restaurant Yeah, he reached out with what the restaurant is he's like. Hey, just want to tell you what the restaurant is a gift super nice guy Not a good restaurant? Neighborhood staple in Raleigh or something like that, 40 years. Oh, god damn. Now having his brother own it. One of these guys was in the Major League system as a pitcher.

Oh, Winston Salem. Does his ERA matter? Brandon said no. I think it's more, what level did he get to? Double A? Triple A. Modesto. Did he get to triple A? No. the triple a very playable Modesto you get the triple I don't think you got past a ball right it was a ball in a single a ball I think it's important to know he wasn't bragging at all. He wasn't even bring it up Yeah, you know he said he wasn't got his talent for his talent drafted. He said I don't have talent

He literally okay. I have no talent. Did he get drafted? At some point he had I mean he played three or four years of minor league baseball okay got drafted no I don't think is yeah our era matters okay yeah so we shouldn't even say it is cool how the MLB has 45 rounds of the draft every year yeah so like everyone get drafted oh you'll run into a dude who got drafted everywhere yeah she's like yeah he got drafted a lot of dudes in high school. I didn't even know you were varsity.

AJ Brown was like, they were with Wallo and Gilly. They were like, oh, yeah, did you, like you didn't get in the NIL. You weren't playing in the NIL age. He's like, oh, no, I got drafted by the Padres. I had a check. Like, I got a lot of money. There's no way he got a lot of money from that, did he?

I mean, I think a lot of money comparatively to a college kid, like, you get like $100,000 signing bonus as an 18-year-old. That's a lot of money. But if you go in the 19th round, you're going to make that much money. I think you get a signing bonus. Yeah. That's got to feel cool.

Yeah, really cool. I want a signing bonus. So diamond back grill in Winston-Salem. I'll be in the area next month, so I'm just giving him a shout out in case he gets a free steak or something. Got to go through. I'm getting a signing bonus soon but I can't talk about that. Oh this week? Next week. Next week's my last week on the app. It's not like we know the date or anything. No we haven't looked at it a thousand times.

Signing bonuses are awesome you just get a bonus for money. That's yeah, there's a bunch of that Why don't you sign your name? I don't get signing but caps caps caps dot. Yeah, it's a second apron and yeah luxury tax Larry bird perhaps going on or grades Yeah, so the signing bonus doesn't go towards the cap thing it It's totally different. You're asking the wrong guys. OK. I'll never understand. But I'll never understand cap. Unless they're franchise tagged, and then it's

bird rights coming to play. Got it. Yeah. I just know every team's in cap hell, and then they do like two things. They're like, good. We have the most in the league now. We just extended one guy and cut one guy.

Looks like we're out of cap. Um, You're you're dancing past the graveyard right now. You've got swimming footage and you're just sitting on it Well, I want to I don't know my hop of the trip. Yeah, you're kind of you're I'm having a I'm having a crisis of confidence. I'm having a I'm having them. I had a moment on this trip that Like a self-reflection moment that shook me to my core I'm having them. I had a moment on this trip that Like a self-reflection moment that shook me to my core Before we dive in is this going to know he can't dive

Literally no chance could he dive is this going to make me laugh or is this going to angry and my entire month pure? I think we all know the face. You're here anger month pure anger I think we all know the face you're gonna anger pure anger all right at least I know you're a gay guy though so yeah so far me well about about that that's where my my like kind of step back you ever have those moments in life you're like wait what am I. It didn't happen at the pool though. It happened at dinner on Tuesday night. We went to dinner. Me, PFT, Hank, Peter Schrager came with us

and our friend Sam Schwartstein who works for Amazon came for us, great dinner. And Sam Schwartstein is a card carrying member of the Che Hive. Dadaday is his favorite day in the whole world. Oh God. Card carrying member. So we got dad a day is his favorite day in the whole world. Oh god card carrying member So we got talking about it and he's like, yeah, I'm che hive through and through and I I said something like, you know Che hives ridiculous and

then it dawned on me that I I think I'm the founder president and owner of the G. I think I'm one-one of the Che Hive because I'm the only person in the world that could actually deplatform. You're the keeper of it. Yeah, and I was like, wait a second. I've been laughing about the Che Hive, like these crazy people. I'm the Che Hive leader.

That's your organization. Everything that happens, good or bad, is your fault. Yeah. The Che Hive goes wherever I tell them. You have the power to end the j-hop right this right and you just won't do it never yeah well never yeah you've said that explicit but it really hurt me because I was like holy shit like every time he frustrates me it's my fault mm-hmm yeah doing it to

myself yeah that you should fire him Che also like we were driving back yesterday we actually had a great time we were listening to third eye blind album rocking out his he does do the same singing voice for every song you know when he when he did our songs the farewell song oh yeah Che give me motorcycle drive-by that's one of my least favorite song on the album no no I thought all those 11 songs were very good that was more of a point I think there's 14 songs on that

album so what about losing a whole year that one's weird one okay losing a whole year oh yeah you're right yeah it's always the same I don't know what's I don't know what it is So wait when you guys are singing you try to sound like the singer and I do yeah, oh yeah, yeah I try to mimic the singer Yeah, I guess I don't know I just don't think I have that range But we were rocking out hard. Yeah, we're gonna get both of us were singing every song

I don't think of the other songs. I've heard him sing sing I've only heard him sing the Giovanni Bernard song jet. Yeah That was Sarah McLaughlin, right? I mean you're messing jet was mine. Yeah, that was for you. The Sun was in my eyes Luckily you had a year to recover yeah a year of doing absolutely nothing cover Again you took one year off. Oh, yeah You took a year off Wait a second. I left. Yeah, I left at the end of June and y'all got there at the end of August. I Don't know But like you sprung it on us that you were leaving the day up Yeah, I got to my house at June on June 30th, and I know I told y'all obviously no

Why did he put together a song if he did it off the top of his hell? He did and he put together that over weeks You know what Brandon? Why don't you shut up and look under your seat? Oh, no? Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. There's actually nothing really that crazy. You have to what you have to eat them. Are those your sweetest fish? Yeah. Okay. Loose ones. Just Lucy's. Yeah, Lucy's.

Yup. That's you have to do it. Gotta eat them. That's the rules Anything under your seat you have to consume. That's a no matter what it is you've been in your ass. Nope Didn't ask about my dick hole To disgust it by that I I'd be curious I don't think it would like yeah, I would be a little curious They're curious. What is you gross? Rose I don't think it would like yeah, I would be a little curious. They're curious. What is you gross? They'd really have it would jam in rose P. J. But she was actually pretty good this trip he the Liam Cohn interviews gonna come out on Wednesday He's he was a giant pussy in that

He didn't give him the business Did give him the business in a way yeah, I agree with you. I did I mean there's like a His whole media team and stuff was there and you know I'm part of you know I'm they're gracious enough to let me be part of the show for a little bit So I'm not gonna be a dickhead, but you dug into him a little bit. Yeah, yeah you did You didn't Did he say something like I was mad because I'm gonna miss you so much I told him The only way you can ask Liam Cohn a question is he has to admit to Liam Cohn beforehand that his feelings were hurt

So he did do that and that kind of took the air out of the room because then you're looking at the guy You're like you're a grown man with your feelings hurt Put you on put you put you on tilt pretty quickly But yeah, Che other than that it was a good trip change you get anybody's number while you're there any Any new connects for the Rolodex? Oh, uh Or yeah, I have to reach out to one guy get his know we hung out a box scout which was cool, but no I met with a bunch of like front office people and you know NFL media people and it's fun there was a I

Guess we left a night early because there was a skirmish last night with the media which is Ft is the lead source. Yeah, Jordan Schultz. I got in a skirmish at a Starbucks former. Yeah, I guess like a physical altercation words what started Conflicting reports about Tom Brady hostings Matthew Stafford in Montana And the best part about the story is Jordan Schultz got into a verbal altercation with Ian Rapport, who Ian Rapport then called the NFL security on Jordan Schultz.

Jordan Schultz, you might recognize his last name. This all happened at a Starbucks. His dad founded Star. Yes. Wow. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I just picture that video on the street of the two guys flipping each other. Yeah, that was, yeah. That was like how this went down. Calling NFL security on some of us.

For strong words. Wow. Yeah, but Che was good overall. I wish you guys could see Che consume the combine. It is his Disney world and when I say that I mean he just loves standing in a hallway watching Grown men with backpacks and lanyards and like their team decal on and he's just like oh my god That's that's that guy from from the Steelers organization che. Do you have an interest in going to the actual event? I

Have I've been to the event it is Pretty boring because like you don't have there's no you can't hear anything so there's no commentary it's just like the guys running which was fine to experience but not you need to hear the commentary yeah the thing is us poking fun at him all comes from

jealousy we can't be happy yeah again yeah that's what it all stems from well no he's also detestable human being but hit Okay, maybe you haven't seen the video of him swim. Oh fuck I should not have said that video Dawson Welcome on Mike's not on oh there you go there. We go purple today. What any reason? No, just uh

No, just there's like half my closet is is is purple. It's kind of just a numbers game You weren't here wearing purple when you were here yesterday Yeah, it's you know one day on one day off to alternating or Tuesday when you were here Tuesday, right was not here Tuesday Oh, yeah, so we're doing we're the Doge Commission of Barstool sports and it's and you're not in trouble. We just realized we don't know what you do. Would it be dope? Great, yeah.

Want me to just talk about my job? Department of Barstool. What's your last name? Barstool official. Yeah. Dawson Gordon? Your name's Dawson Gordon? Well, actually, backwards.

Yeah, you should be Gordon Dawson. Yeah, you're Gordon Dawson. Fix that. We're doing efficiency here. Fix that. Fix your last name first name Oh story we actually learned that Gordon is is actually not my real last name We learned like a few months ago that my grandpa when he fled

Poland after the World War two changed his last name because he was a spy So my actual real last name is Leszek He was a spy. So my actual real last name is Leschick. So I'm like, so kind of crazy family story that we just learned. So you just learned this? We just learned this about three months ago. Wow.

Whoa. Yeah. Gordon? Did Gordon mean something to you guys? Well, the NASCAR fan? For my high school graduation, my dad bought me a kilt because Scottish. Right?

You guys thought you were Scottish? I'm not Scott you changed ethnicities you got a Weird graduation formal. You know it's a formal thing in Scottish. You got a kill you should have gotten a light bulb You couldn't you know? So you guys spent you spent your whole life up until now like celebrating your Scottish heritage Like not like hardcore, but you've got a kill kill Yeah, well we also went to Scotland when 250 years ago. This is your grandfather what 60 or 70 years ago 80 years ago Yeah, so basically my world would be turned upside down. Oh, yes, if you're a spy

Yeah, it's a it's a big deal in our family right now. It's a big Yeah, are there factions like the Gordons against the Lashaks? So basically the story is I Gotta make sure that right here Well, obviously like we don't know the full story because my grandfather died before I was even born. But he was helping out apparently Jews escape from the from eastern block of Russia, Ukraine, whatever that part. And, you. And a lot of Nazis, they kinda had to hit out for him. So when the war ended, he needed to flee cuz I don't know. That's like the last enemy you want.

Yeah, I'm not, I don't know the exact story and I'm not doing a great job on it. It sounds like he was heroic. But yes, heroic and- Yeah, yeah. We're asking him about his efficiency in his job And he came in instead with a with a story about his hero grandfather. Oh, that's not what I was thinking Oh, what were you thinking? I was thinking your grandpa might be a Nazi. Yeah, he was a

After world no I was me in the Nazi uniform was me spy Fled and changed his identity. Okay. You know, did he work for NASA too? No, he, he actually flew to, so my, so my dad's from Canada. So he, he basically went to, uh, like Ottawa. Okay. So that's where my dad got it. Okay. Yeah. So that's where, but yeah, basically no, nobody knew this. And then my dad was going, uh, through like old letters and he wrote letters to that were never sent that had like Leschick in it, all that stuff. And I did some backtracking and then basically all of my grandpa's, uh, family member or like siblings all thought that he died, um,

like in the war and they always heard about this guy but yeah and it was just it's this whole thing like we have like now like a monthly zoom call with our friends and our family in like Ukraine that's crazy yeah other people take family way more serious yeah whoa so you found out you're Polish. How long ago? Well, so I think it's. Wait, is your mom Polish too? No, my my mom's Croatian and Irish. Okay. But I think the Polish thing actually might not. I think I might not be Polish and I think it's just. just Yeah

Things to figure out yeah Look is basically he had the whole cover story and the cover story of of like where he came from It's like half true and and half not true, so it's hard to figure out what the right so yeah It's crazy never mind like figuring out what it is. He does here. He doesn't know who he is. Yeah Bigger fish to fry this job. Yeah, so what do you do? What I do at Barstool? I work on our college team basically Everything so everything that we do from a vice story college standpoint in terms of campaign so whether it's Best College Town or we'll have stuff going on with March Madness,

making sure that all of those ads run, we're doing a good job highlighting brands that sponsor us. Since Vice Stories, it's not like a content-led brand. It's all just a bunch of faceless pages. So it's really fun. We have a great team and like Gino's... Is Gino your boss? No, we're like equals. He would say that he works on the merchandise part of our business.

Would he say that he oversees you? No, he would say that we are equals. Who's your boss? Ben. DiGiulio. Ben. Oh, Ben DiGiulio, okay. He oversees all viceroys and then Scott oversees all of college, Scott Berenstein.

Okay. Yeah. Now, do you do any off-hours diplomatic relations with specifically Texas Christian University? Yeah, I mean, I try to help our school as you know much as I I can I'm not You know like donating money cuz I don't whatever but I try to help out volunteer Whatever is anything named after you and he is your now imprinted anywhere now. No nothing like that Maybe one day, but which name yeah You know maybe like, I don't know.

Something, actually you know what, maybe, well there was a charity we started my senior year that's now a fully like endowed thing at TCU and maybe there was, I don't know, maybe there's something there. Okay. Is there any photo of you in the kilt? There probably is.

Yeah. Shoot, I don't know. What about, You played at TCU. Did you get snaps? No, no, I was nice basically like I wasn't like a very good high school football player. I was like an average Rotator, but I always wanted to play college football like that was like my dream growing up and when I got to TCU I to play college football. That was like my dream growing up. And when I got to TCU, I was like, well, I'm not good at what I did at high school, so what's the easiest thing that I can learn? Kicking. So I just spent my whole freshman year taking my skateboard to the public high school and I just learned how

to kick. Wait, oh, you were a kicker. I thought you were a long snap. You were a kicker. Yeah, I was a place kicker, field goal. So you never kicked? Never kicked. In practice, but never in a game. Did you ever hold in a game? No, never touched the field.

They never, were they ever like, hey, we gotta get, he's a senior, let's get him a kick? Well, I didn't play my senior year. I stopped. It sounds like you didn't play any of the years. Well, correct, correct. Wasn't on the roster. But I was, when Sonny Dykes got hired that would have been my fifth year and he offered to have me come back for a fifth year

But then that was when I got the offer to come here and I was like got it. This is my dream So yeah, but that's pretty cool still. Yeah, I know it was awesome I mean I got to meet a lot of great people and you know You get a jersey with your name on the back. Yeah, so yeah Yeah, and you got to put on the pads on the sideline. Yes. Yeah, that's all you need That's how that I need it. I mean so tight. You know how it is. Yeah, it's awesome. Yeah, I mean I want he's way cooler Yeah That's pretty badass. So you're like my dream was to play college football Yeah, we just I suck at college football. I suck at football, but I'm still gonna yeah get my dream done. Yeah, that's awesome

Yeah, no it was there was this in there was this inflection point and when I started I really sucked because it's like I'm not built like a kicker by any means like and we're I'm like it's like I'm about to quit and I'm at this public high school and this guy walks up to me and it's the all time leading big 12 field goal kicker, Jaden Oberkramm and he picked at TCU and he offered to mentor me. And at that moment I was like, I can't give up. But yeah, I never played at all, but it was just, you know, taught me a lot about work

ethic and stuff. Yeah. Did just taught me a lot about work ethic and stuff. Yeah, did you go through hell with workouts and shit? Oh, yeah. Kickers. You had to do all the conditioning? All of it? All of the conditioning, all that stuff. Well, because mainly, when you're like,

I mean, I don't know what it's like being a walk-on on a basketball team. But if you're know below the second string your scout team, so you basically You aren't your actual role. So I was counting running back and I got killed No, I played center. Oh, it's hilarious. I played I played center on our scout team guarding like six nine two sixty guys Just getting yeah droid. I bet you have some good stories from that but yeah no it was it was fun being being on the scout team but then there were some days where I would just get absolutely murdered. Do you have a fake diarrhea that's what I used to do no other days I'd put a I put the phone in the bathroom before practice and then a drill would start

and I'd pretend I have diarrhea and then I just go sit. Well, there's the phone plan. Yeah. Yeah. With the phone planted. It was like, so we would do like a practice plan. The coaches would type up the practice plan and I'd have the manager show me the plan. And if one-on-one defense was defense drills were on the practice sheet, I would, I would get diarrhea and I would leave.

And then I would come back after and just be like God who that never know what's gonna strike yeah yeah that's really yeah well if you ever walk on again you could yeah try that you would take your skateboard to the practice field too so there was a Pascoe high school was like three blocks down down the road because if I went to the practice field I would get kicked off since I wasn't a player so I would just go down there after class and there was a point where I didn't have like like the like the holder so I would bring a little I would bring like some textbooks to like you know have it lifted up to the side and like some

shitty ball that I found on Amazon and kind of hold it up so I could kick and then once I kind of got more serious I Obviously bought balls and stuff like that some balls Wow, what a story you're just like your grandfather. Yeah, hopefully all right. I don't know yeah Yeah, so I think you keep your job. Thank you appreciate that guys. It's good. It's happening on meeting of dope though Department of Barstool efficiency yeah, yeah, all right, and if any advertisers want to get involved with Barstool College. Let us know okay Here we go first time. He's done his job this year Dawson Wow good appearance feel like we really good we accomplish something there. Yeah, I don't think purple and blue

It's crazy. So Polish what what happens when you have somebody come down here if we keep doing this and they actually don't do anything Nothing. Okay Just laugh about it on their way For a second it was gonna be awkward for life to Doing nothing It's crazy that people have stories about their family like that and I All I know is my grandparents were born in Indiana. That's about it Like what about after the vote about before that and they're like, we don't know man

With the dating show really guys having heirlooms and like yeah, yeah, I don't have a single air That was tough for me. I don't I have nothing nothing Mental I know no stories. I have no idea what my heritage is whatsoever. I have no idea which Country I always forget I answer get the country. I was feel bad cuz I don't really have the desire Yeah, is that more rare these days? We're nor like I literally might the furthest back my family goes I is Indiana Yeah, but he far as I know is we just popped up with look out of the corn Dawson just found out

He's Ukrainian something and now he has weekly zooms. Yeah. Yeah, that's yeah that They're active and yeah Like when people travel to their like grandparents hometown in a different country That's what we did. We did Ireland to go away to find our family. Yeah, we still have family there I'm like close with my cousin like the ones that are my age. We talked like Pretty regular jealous. That would be awesome. I am jealous. I go to Logan Sport, Indiana Dick's sporting goods a crown point all right does, Indiana have natives Surely

Oh No, I don't think so Illinois does right Illinois is a line I mean we've indiana might but not not that The line not like a certain presence There's like a I don't know thing here with like a thousand a thousand steps There's like a pyramid here really like a like a grass yeah, I think that's interesting Stephen Were you bashing Indiana when we were driving? Oh? Sam Sam. Oh, yes, Sam was not the sand. That's not the sand that just literally just walked in All right rocket money you sign up for something forget about it after the trial period ends Then you're charged month after month after month the subscriptions are there, but you're not using them

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Just walked in yeah, we knew we had a feeling there was a last year when we were there We were staying at that hotel and there's a valet Head of the valet was a big fan. So we're like, let's just go and see and then he just popped up right away He's like hey didn't see I didn't think I'd see you guys like hey, can you listen the pool? No problem. Yeah We got in the pool. How long until you got disgusted by what you saw almost immediately. All right There were four temps Four temps to swim a lap.

Now mind you, the pool was 20 feet long. Did you give him any instructions? Were you like, what did you say to him? I was like, I want to see what you got. You just do what you do. I'll sit over here. I tried to explain to him. You'll see there was some struggle with the turn.

Okay. I don't know what this and I tried to explain to him what it was how to do it that one's gonna be that's why you tried to tell him how to do a legit turn like an actual house swimmer flipping on the wall flipping well he was baffled by is like how do they turn yeah I've seen it but yeah, I don't know how to do it. Also it's very funny because it's a four foot deep pool so he's struggling but then he could just stand up. Stand right up. And like be belly button up out of water.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, okay. Alright so you want to show attempt one Lucas? This also includes Stephen Che giving me commentary on the pool temperature that I did not need. So attempt one is 216 long? Yeah, well there was a little banter that he had. Ah, I get it. That's fine.

He's smiling like, oh that's fine. Temperature? So much commentary for like, no, no, don't care. Oh, oh! Okay. Alright, gets himself ready. You can probably fast forward all right, this is a I hear the excitement in your voice. Yeah, so again this pool is like look out look out. It's it's 20 feet

It's an NBA 3. It's like 25. He kept on saying that he's like this is the NBA 3 dude Okay Okay. Not a bad stroke except in fact it's so slow. You can put your head up. I don't think that's 25 feet either. So that's it. Wait you have to keep your head under the water on the turn. You couldn't figure out the turn.

Wait you take your head up and you still can only do like halfway back? He said he takes a two to three minute break after that was how many sad we were there for 35 minutes And he did for last Mike after that my home pool is much bigger, so I just Three minute break I take like a one to one and a half minute break How much bigger is your pool that you usually swim in uh Even after that in this pool. How much bigger is your pool that you usually swim in? Double that size probably so it's six seconds of swimming How many seconds of swimming was that? Let's count. Yeah count these things so there was maybe some miscommunication He thought he was only going down. I told him after this was like I want to see down and back

So 56 you take off back so 56 you take off one two three four five seven strokes seven arm swings yeah remarkably slow seven to eight remarkably slow but that's when you usually do this you swim for ten to fifteen seconds yep stop for five sixty to ninety seconds I just you're already making me. And Stephen also told me Titus he was like I was like dude. Why did you stop? He's like well I'm trying to build up my lung capacity and like stamina

He does one way down Once a month. He's not gonna build anything. Well fairness, like, I'm going to be doing this every week. We had a lot of, like, travel stuff. And then it was very cold. And then my kids were sick. And it's like, all right. But he's not testing himself. He just basically, the minute he has mild uncomfort, he's like, all right,

I'm done with that. How did your brain think of this New Year's Day? Like, I know what I'm going to do this year. Well, I was trying to get better at swimming. And then I decided I wanted to increase my stamina. So I I don't think just swim you got to swim more than that Like you wouldn't train for a marathon by running 10 yards and then calling it a day, right? As you wouldn't sprint 10 yards he might Also again he held he could hold his breath for six seconds

That's it for six seconds. That's it. That... Show it, show it. All right, okay, all right, all right. You're right, you're right, because then we discussed off camera, and we said the turn's got it very important. You got to try to do the turn. This is him finishing the lap.

He was very... Two-minute break? Yeah, one and two. You wanted a two-minute break. It's been seven seconds of swimming. The pool is so small. You hardly had to pan the camera. It was a very small pool.

But I'm not used to that nurse in a pool like this Seven strokes his stroke to like again. It's Technically the form isn't bad, but he has the speed at which he swims is that of a guy who's Like his boat got capsized and it's like 24 hours in and this is the last dying breath. I'm gonna reach land. That's what his starting stroke is. The speed doesn't match the amount of movement. Right, right.

So are you actually trying to increase your cardiovascular endurance? No. For swimming, yes. It's not working. But you think holding your breath is how you do that I? Think that's a good way Alright, let's not judge cuz he did he did better. He got the turn

So I want to see you guys we're gonna see attempt to this is big My boy can go is Wow Can he hold his breath on the turn? Boy here goes Wow Can he hold his breath on the turn? Yep, oh my god. He kept his head up. Yeah, look at this I was so angry when he did that Steve you smoke cigarettes no very rarely hold on play the end. This is my favorite part. He finishes off the lap Yeah, these like I gotta clean this up. This is insane.

This is what? Like, all right, got to clean this one up. That's a lot. And that was the best one? No, no, no, he got better. Okay. He got better. Play the third.

He got better. I'll give him credit. I think there's something there where he can he can build to this Cuz like he got to a point where I was like, all right, you're actually doing this now. All right All right, here he goes nails the turn I can't even the world record of over 50 feet underwater The turn was a little sloppy. Is he gonna run out of breath? Yeah The turn was a little sloppy. Is he gonna run out of breath? Yeah, I'm just gonna get better.

He didn't get better at all. Same example. He did not get better at all. Steve, that's 15 seconds of holding your breath. It was electric watching, because I was like, oh, here he comes. Oh, and he's gotta come up. So if I'm being honest, yeah, the turn through,

I can hold my breath for about 30 seconds but when you're moving and I'm trying to Orient myself in a completely different direction and we talked about doing the flip but with it being like four feet deep a little dangerous so Opted against it. But yeah, I couldn't figure out how to do it So I got to watch tape of the other grades the Phelps the Lockdys and figure out how to do an underwater turn also yeah, they don't hold their breath right? Yeah, he did it so the fourth attempt was the best one and he also

He got smart. He basically was pushing off and getting like Three a third of the way down the pool without having to hold his breath so Like you'll see you he kind of pushes off and doesn't go underwater for a little bit. This is his final attempt. Set. This one was good. Ready, set.

See, then he goes underwater. Okay. Okay, he's off. Can the turn happen? In this one you made it all the way it's going early folks you crush this one So is there just like Is that are you panicking Steve like he finishes off credit to him he finishes it off look at that All 12 feet of that so where do you see yourself at the end of the year? I?

Mean I'm gonna get a bigger pool than this but ideal so if a pool is twice the size that I'm normally in I Ideally will be able to swim down and do a turn and come back in one breath I don't know if that's gonna be possible, but it's a lot working towards it It's it's it's still February and now Officially we got four and a half laps down. So we're at nine point seven five Oh behind pace, but a little bit the way he would come up When he's on his way back It was like a deep diver going like seven thousand. Yes, he's on his way back, it was like a deep diver going like 7,000 feet.

He's springing up near death. In a four-foot pool after swimming for 12 seconds. What's going on in your head? Are you panicking? The turn, the turn, the turn through. I wasn't expecting it, because when we walked in I was like, oh shit, I'm going to put up numbers in this pool. It's super tiny. But then... The turn. Yeah, the turn. yeah when I do it now

I just go point a to point B break back So when you do the turn are you saying like let me let me dig out a little bit more Or because it looks like you're just kind of going and then suddenly you're like fuck. I'm gonna die yeah, right pop up, right? Oh, yeah, like any part of you. That's like let me just get a little bit more Let me show the pop-up again. Try to get 15 seconds It's like yeah, there's like the turn is very disorienting if you don't know you could have stood up wasn't how you have goggles around He got worse that was the worst one I think you're gonna run out of breath. Oh!

Oh! Oh! Look how much more he has to go! It was the tiniest pool. You keep saying you need your long lap that you usually have, but having an extra wall turn would help you. Yeah. You get to push off.

He said to me after, he's like, how many times do you think you can go there and back underwater? I was like, I don't know, probably like three or four times like what so do you get it's not that yeah Do you go in deep ends of pool Stephen? Yeah? You should know the one end I swim to is like have you ever slept swimming a lake or anything? I don't think I'm swimming a lake, but I mean the the pool I go to one of the ends is pretty deep I I've asked the same question every time at the the end of the year, you want to be better at holding your breath and swimming. Yes, Nick, that's a good question,

because it makes no sense. That doesn't, that's not gonna be endurance. Correct. I mean, at this point, I can't change it. Do you guys want me to change it? It would be the same thing that he would be doing is if he was like, at the end of the year, I wanna bench press 250 pounds,

and then once a week, he would go and bench press the bar. Yeah one time for ten seconds. Yeah Steve I can't have my child born into a world where you've changed your years resolution, right? Yeah, I can't I can't have that happen. I need you to stick with this is very important all of us I also think that like after witnessing it firsthand I know we talked about doing a stream where he tries to accomplish a goal I think we're gonna wait till he gets to like 80 he just did 20 laps yeah and then we'll just do a 20 lap stream cuz that will be about three or four hours how long were you there we were there for about 30 minutes he did four

laps we were in the pool for it was like 20 under 15 no more than 10 minutes under 50 so let me understand this so when you go to your pool at your gym No more than 10 minutes Under 50 so help me understand this so when you go to your pool at your gym Yeah, you will do a down and back basically on that pool if we're doing the you know the the comparison here You would basically do one down and back in that pool, and then you would stop for 30 minutes. Yeah My sole focus isn't just like doing that like I'm I go there to help my kids And then I'll do one lap and then I'll do you know Play with my kids for 30 minutes, and then before we leave I'll do one you're trying Joey Langone Just text me a good point. What what does this mean for your pussy eating? Are you popping up under the sheets?

I mean, I'm stationed. I don't want to get too into it, but like I mean, I'm stationed. I don't get too into it, but like See a snorkel I just looked we were there for 18 minutes and I can see the timestamps on my phone so 18 minutes was What took you four laps? So can somebody do the math on how long though? Yeah, well after the first one was like I need like a two to three minute break after going right one way This was a shorter break pool. I'm gonna start doing a turn and pussy eating. Yeah, well after the first one was like I need like a two to three minute break after going right one way This was a shorter break pool. I'm gonna start doing a turn and pussy eating. Yeah, right Innovate the turn man. I think you gotta flip upside down. You flip. Yeah, and you start kissing her mouth

Dante we were discussing we want to do a potential maybe once a month DJ Friday, do you know any DJs that would do that I? Proposed this to Hank before the office open he said that we couldn't do it because of the whole music copyright thing Oh, we're not putting it out. We're just it's for us for vibes. Oh, I would fucking love love Yeah, you know someone. No, we asked him if you know somebody can come do it I was just we were just interview in the low-cash guys and I was asking them, they used to be DJs before they became real musicians. And, yeah, you got it.

But I was like, do you guys ever miss DJing? And they were like, fuck no, and I actually do. So I would love the opportunity to try out. Wait, you're a DJ? I would love the opportunity to try out the position. No, you're the only one we would pick. I would love that. You said try out.

I was not expecting this. Decadence in here. I got a text from Big Cat and I was like, come on the act. I'm like, all right, so either the Epstein files dropped. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or they're gonna roast me about something that happened this week.

So. No, we should have you DJ because we play pick up on Fridays. That would be awesome. Oh, that would be really cool. I'd really like that. That would be sick. Yeah.

Just vibe out. Let's do it. But since you are here, the Epstein files. Did they drop? I don't know. I haven't seen. I have been, we just did a great interview for like the last hour with White Sox, Dave and the low cash guys.

So what's going on with the Epstein files? I don't know. they're supposedly coming out today. Who are you expecting to see on it? Uh Well all of us are here, so I guess none of us are very out of the loop What are the what are the fire? What does that mean? It's gonna be like a list of all The flight logs of the people that flew is Epstein Zero zero percent chance you're on it right Tante Yes God yes, I'm just asking but I I have seen but I have seen

little Dicks island. Oh what what is that his island? What'd you say? Yeah? Are you saw in person? Yeah from above in the air no from like the shore So how could you say never step foot on it on the shore? I've never stepped foot on it, but I've like fished around it. What you call it little dick I used to go to st. John all the time okay, so you would just pull up to little st. No, you do you take a charter for the day and go fishing for the day? And they would always be like see that island never go there. That's

Like creepy stuff goes on there like the locals all have known about it forever before all this shit blew up. You would just watch the island. Yeah. From afar. So it's not zero it sounds like. No, it's zero. So a witness.

Is there a chance some of your DNA is on there if you spit into the water and it washed up? No. Zero? No. Is there a chance there's your DNA is on there if you spit into the water and it washed up now? Zero no is there a chance. There's anyone in your phone right now that could be on that. That's a great question Thank you. You've traveled a lot been in a lot of circles with some higher powers They can't you're also have you ever learned anything I am in his phone Oh, I bet yeah, I bet you have someone in your phone. Oh, yeah Get his ass you have way more powerful people in your phone than I do. I bet you do.

I want one in my phone. You're gonna be compromised for sure. You think so? Yeah. Oh. You're gonna be like, oh, I thought this was. Well, no, I mean, I text with Prince Andrew a lot, but he wasn't.

No. No, I think he's fine. No, I think Bill Gates is in trouble. I think everyone's been freaking out, like, why haven't they come out? They said they were gonna release him. Is there a chance he doesn't exist? No, I think that they're trying to get tabs on everybody,

because when they do announce it and it does drop, everyone's gonna scatter, and I think a lot of people are gonna take off, so they want to make sure They can round them up. Mm-hmm. Wait, so they're gonna arrest people off this list. Oh, yeah Why wouldn't they have arrested him before? Why would they release the list and then arrest? I think that's kind of what what's gonna happen, but why wouldn't they arrest them right now? Just giving them time to run Yeah, just publicly outing them. Yeah, that makes no sense. I don't know that doesn't track doesn't yeah I don't think the FBI is like hey, we're gonna

We're gonna wait to tell you and then we're gonna get you. It's like hide-and-seek No, I think it's one of those like knock-knock 6 a.m. Mm-hmm things so knock-knock joke got it. Yeah, all right. Well when it releases we'd like to hear from you Yeah, who is your bitch-ass dickhead of the week at Barstool? Mmm? Have you been censored recently pride Jeff Lowe, okay? Oh Let's go drop the D. Yeah, just like I don't like really understand I think he has like a lot of animosity towards me and I Don't understand why but it comes out anytime

Like there's the slightest bit of conflict I know people have been in this situation before and I think Jeff would ask what he did to make you think that's my That's my question. But what? Like I've been getting pulled into Twitter battles about a dozen and getting left out or whatever, which I've voiced over the last couple years. I think it sucks that our team got railroaded

and switched up and all that shit, but whatever. And then he turned it around that I basically quit, which never happened. What's the backstory in that? What was your team and why did they get dismantled? We made it to the championship the first year. It was Riggs, Hank, and I. We had a fucking great run.

We lost to Coley's team. Yeah. And after that, he blew up the team. He convinced Riggs to trade himself to another team. Wow. So we had to start fresh. I raised a stank. It was just a lot of drama, but it's whatever.

I still liked the overall game and all that. And yeah, any time I complain about it, he goes after me. Would JDL? Every time you complain about it He goes after me what JDL every time you complain about it privately or adding Crazy every time you complain about it. He goes after you He was on the run down the other day and and he was like you know Dante and rear admiral But I was just like dude. I fucking responded to somebody on Twitter that was Yeah, you might have taken out a little it's bullshit that I don't have a team anymore Which I agree would JDL admit to telling reeks to join a different team or is that a concern he hasn't denied it

Jdl admit to telling reeks to join a different team or is that a concern he hasn't denied it Sounds like he's out to get you no, I don't I Don't know and I got and I got left off a surviving bar stool this year. Oh, yeah Oh, wow, I felt bad for you off. Wow You were on are you in the combine today? Yeah, man. All right. Let's go. There we go. I missed the walkthrough yesterday though, so what do we what do we got for events? I know I'm already shuttle bench and Throwing drill maybe it's the same as last week's

Okay, yeah, I miss that too. Are we doing the jump the jump thing? I don't think I don't see it lineman drill What's the lineman drill? I just saw it on paper. I have no idea I'm just announcing so. I don't see it. Lineman drill. What's the lineman drill? I just saw it on paper, I have no idea. I'm just announcing it. Try not to get hurt today. This is a try not to get hurt day. Try not to get hurt. I'm with you on that.

Sign up for Rone's one-on-one to one. I already did, baby. All right, let's go. All right, thank you, Dante. Thank you, guys. Yeah, that's gonna be electric. Rone's got a, I think New York is doing their side of the bracket tomorrow.

Yep, and then he's coming out here? Yeah, next week. Who gets ball first? I've talked about it, I don't know if he's decided it. I told him that, and he's gonna, Rone's smarter than me, he's gonna figure out a good way to do it. I was like, something about the idea of having the competition to see who gets ball first being longer than the actual game.

That's funny. So I think he's going to use different things. Yeah. It should be like a week long. It should be a one-on-one survivor. We have Plinko Day tomorrow, by the way. Is everyone ready? I'll be ready. Do we have to pick letters or how do we know what to bring or what to have ready? Are we keeping our letters? Are we assigning letters? I don't know, I just wanna make sure. What was your letter before?

You don't remember? Does anybody? I think you were A. I was the E. I was H. I was the Yak logos. The logos, I just was K. I'll take A this time.

You'll take A. Kate, you take the T the let's do a letter draft tea yeah I'll be tea then Danny you sit this one out um yeah Danny what animal doesn't start so a good tea and a bad tea we need a good thing and a bad thing right yeah okay wait so your tea right you got I'll be tea I'll be this is what I'm saying if we don't discuss it We're gonna be a jumble. That's true. You're right. I'm gonna be a jumble. Let's all be tea No, it's so who's I'll be a right I'll be a I'll be a Kate's thinking out for the show I have one idea for a is it okay?

Logos I'm gonna take the I'll take a H. Just gonna do antique again. I'll be the Yak logos. I'm gonna take the E. I'll take H. I'll do T. Where is there a T in Plinko or Yak? The Yak. And then, Kyle, what do you have? Why? Where was there an E?

And then, Stephen, you have the wheel? The wheel, yep. I'm gonna light a candle for you tonight, Kay. Yeah, thanks. And Lucas, you're gonna be the producer again tomorrow, okay what yes And the rule is if we hit the wheel The producer has to do what what was it the way we had the last time suck us off I'm gonna suck us off or get stabbed with a knife

Suck our penis while we stab him with yes, that's right. Yeah, we have to kill you before we come We're gonna find out if the shushing scene was real or not Yep, which one when he was like if you stabbed me when I'm sucking your dick. I'll Jaw. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah find out. That's right. Yeah, it's busters I'll shake myth busters. There we go Of course, we hit the wheel. We do you wrap those lips around our cocks and we stab you in the neck Yeah for research purposes Now he's dead guys myth busted and me

I also had a moment today the this happened to you Brandon where the Guys in the control room Are watching footage of something that maybe happened that you thought was in private. Oh When did it happen to me? No, it happened to me today. Oh and they were all having a hoot and holler Oh now, okay. What did you do? Did you fall? Did you run in the glass? I might have my my body might have been too heavy for something you broke something. Okay, you're here Wait, yeah, I don't think you could play with the sound cuz I was listening to music while I was doing it

Or maybe you could play. Oh, yeah, I guess I did I broke it I sat down on one of those benches and broke it one day. Yeah like that. All right I'm in the right corner Where see me over there? No, no There you go. See me over there. No no There you go see me That's so I'll see that again that yeah, I didn't think anyone saw like I think there were cameras in there That's one hell of a noise man So that's so funny every time it happens. I was just sitting there like fuck

Someone didn't lock the thing yeah, is that your escape room? No, I was I was sitting in there waiting for Shane's we're gonna we're gonna do a photo shoot okay then I broke a camera oh a camera was on there yeah cameras on there you can see it I think go back to it was the first thing I picked up was the camera I was picking it up that's good immediately yeah oh you didn't say you picked it up you started picking it up I picked all the stuff up I picked it up I would have just sprinted away I I would have looked at it confused like who the fuck did that? Broke shit in there broke the table. Yeah sucks

All right, so you guys you guys good with where we're at with swimming. I think that's Yeah, no as I thought it would be Actually worse. Yeah, so you would say like you were a terrible swimmer, or you are a terrible swimmer Correct Stephen oh Yeah, so you would say like you were a terrible swimmer, or you are a terrible swimmer, correct? Steven. Oh, I'm not a good swimmer. My only issue with that is if you are, and you are a terrible swimmer, and watching you swim is painful, why then was swimming your New Year's

resolution? Because it's just so far away from what you are good at. Make your weaknesses your strengths. But you're not. Nobody's worried about if your weakness in swimming becomes a strength. It doesn't improve your life at all. Well, my kids get good at swimming.

Like, it'd be good to... Not only that, Brandon, but at the end of the year when we're like, hey, Steven, can you swim five laps? He's going to be like, no. Right. The answer will still be no. I feel like I keep asking. Are you trying to get better at the technical aspect of swimming or for swimming longer?

Think all of it, and he keeps not answering like that. He doesn't know big no answer have you ever Don't okay. You said earlier you're gonna study the tape of the greats And I think one of the first things you'll notice is they breathe yeah, their face is not yeah You're gonna improve is they that's the easiest path to improvement just pick your fucking head up But again, I mean you guys are razz me for it, but I don't think you guys want me to change it either No at this point. I don't But I'm still gonna stay frustrated Can you take a before picture right now and an after picture view at the end of the year just to see if there's any

Physical improvements to all this swimming that'll be good sure you might get jacked Really? All the vessels in his eyes are just gonna be popped. Yeah, he's gonna have three brain cells left He is not back on track, but he's doing better with the four laps Counting his four laps. What's the next time you're gonna be in the pool? It should be Tuesday, but I mean it depends on how long the like pro day runs so I'm very excited for that. Oh my god I'm so excited. Are we testing stuff Monday? Yeah I think so. We got to get DJ. We're gonna

make sure on Monday we can test some stuff. I'm so excited. And now we were meeting and we came up with what I think way better ideas and last some good ideas Yes, way better ideas. We have way last year was awesome. So yes This year will be even more awesome. And we're also running back a couple things to a little yeah Yeah, four or five of us, but for as great as last year was there were some duds Yes, and I think we addressed those and I think you're still assaulting him via football, right? Yes, yes, yeah. Also it was pointed out to me that we are running this

on the start of Mardi Gras. I think Tuesday's Fat Tuesday. So there's a pretty good chance Mincy just doesn't show. Very. Pretty high. He'll be filled with cake. Yeah, he will. And babies.

Yeah, he actually eats the baby every year. So we have a baby. And then I'm doing Lucas's torture chamber on Tuesday night. It's your challenge. What's that? The day of the fucking. Yeah, it's going to be a long day for me.

We're doing the Doug Doug challenge. Did you announce it yet, Lucas? No. Oh, sorry. Does it matter? I don't know. I mean, what better way to announce it than to do it right now? I won't say who's doing it. I'll just say the Doug Doug challenge where you have to go to a drive-through and order

exactly what the person in front of you orders. Oh, I love that. How many can you hit? That's awesome. Record is 15. We're going to go for the record. Hit in what sense? You have to eat and eat?

You have to eat? What like if you go to? Mc if you're in front of us at McDonald's you get a big mac and a fries and a large coke We have to then order that and eat it. Why is it? Why is it called the dug-dug? I don't know. Will you be mobile during this entire show? Yes, you will does this account for like if there's Many people in the car. Yeah Risky, I wonder what the average order is for like if there's many people in the car. Yeah. That's risky. I wonder what the average order is.

It's a complete gamble. We could go do this and we're trying to get the record at 15, but we could be out in four stops. Could you? Because someone gets a, you know, someone orders for a family of 12. Could you strategically be like, okay, this is a small car with one person in it.

There is, I think there is some scheming that you can do Are you going to just circle Cities Welcome to the I'll have what he's having fast food challenge a radical Gastronomic journey that will test your taste buds and expand your stomach like never before this epic food adventure Kickstarted by the legendary youtuber dug Doug legend has taken the world by storm. And now it's your turn to join the ranks of the fearless contenders. Gather your courage and three

other daring fighters each with an insatiable hunger for victory. Remember the rules are simple. You're allowed a maximum of one drink place. Think Starbucks up to two dessert stops. Queue the mouthwatering, crispy cream. KFC is an absolute must on your fast food conquest. Shitting is A-OK. Nature's call right. Vomiting is strictly off limits until you've completed the entire challenge. That's where I'm gonna be out. I like that animated line a lot.

Yeah. So 15 is the champion. You like that a lot? A lot. I don't know why. Or 15 would be the record. 14. I don't like the spinning things But I love the line the lines good. I don't think we're gonna get Lucas. I Don't know. I've seen Tate's map so far and there's a ton in like certain areas. Just luck of the draw

I think you guys will be ten you got some you got some eaters in that crew including yourself. Well, who's in the crew? me Tate max Kadech. Well, who's in the crew? Me, Tate, Max, Kadech. Oh, yeah, you guys are fine. Squire. Come on. Yeah. What time? What's the time frame?

Because I think you go till you tap out. And I'm saying, what time are you starting? Because are people going to be ordering dinner? I think it's parcel after dark at 8 o'clock. Oh, duh. Is there a chance Tate becomes the fattest man who ever lived? Yeah. Yep. That stream on Tuesday was crazy.

Yes. They were just in torture. He did finish with an 11-mile walk. I know. Was it you that tweeted, Mincy, his mental math amazes me. Oh! Every day, every time I see you.

Oh, it was so impressive. It's insane. Find that clip. He's just an idiot savant. You want another? Good job, Ed. Sure. What's 46 divided by three? 15.33.

Hey, do you need a bill? See? No, I'm... Those two numbers are never used together. No. How would he know that? How would that help him in life? I don't know 46 divided by So long just I have to throw in the towel did y'all see how loud his dry he was yeah Oh, yeah, oh, yeah. It was shocking. I miss that. Danny damn near jumped out of his skin.

Yeah, scared. Danny, you were there for that. Yeah. Well, I thought he was aimed it towards me. Were you just disgusted by the whole thing? Yeah, it was gross. I was most disgusted by Tate being like five hours in and only getting one Wow that's not good for next Tuesday that wasn't a dry heave that was oh he got mad at it I was a wet fart out of his mouth yeah but then Danny filmed him puking oh yeah oh you take off your headphones if you don't eat. Oh, yeah, I want to hear it I don't want to help the museum. I want after lunch wait till the end. Yeah, or End of the video I meant oh No You're discretion advised

Oh It's worse I show it fine fuck it Don't worry, I'm with you, Mincy. So is Will. Oh my god. Hahahaha. Oh man. Picture Mincy after that screaming as loud as he can while Puke is also just coming out. He was screaming as loud as he can.

He was screaming. H as he... He was screaming? He came out sweating. Puke all over his shirt obviously. But yeah, it was a tough one. Yeah, Tate's gonna kill himself. This is unsustainable. But it's great content. All he wants to do is eat food.

Every stream he's like, let's eat food Let's see how much food we could eat. He also credit to Tatey dove headfirst into this thing sure did Yeah, not half-assed thing. Have you seen his face though? It's a bad his soul's bad bad face bad face Didn't used to be I think he thought ever good I think he saw like the the hoopla around Jerry hitting the hole in one Yeah, see like the highs and you say oh I get an opportunity at that that seems nice. Yeah, but you don't see what Torture it takes to I mean he's not exactly you also when you watch parcel after dark I understand the frustration the chat has because you're watching and you're not eating the things are eating

So you're like, why can't he eat one McDonald's fries after he's eaten, you know, like 10 So why can't they make 10 free throws in a row? Right guy could do that But it's a lot yeah, so make it interactive to watch it past three hours you have to do what they're doing Yeah, you have to start eating Everyone has to get full together. Wow. Yeah. Seven days isn't enough to restore the face.

Yeah, but he's going to be in face debt. Not without face damage. He EOs. Yeah, he's already behind. Tell me that the one after that is not a needing challenge, Lucas. I don't think so, but there's one soon after that that's another drinking one looming how far planned out are you it's not just that I'm staying

up Lucas we had we had one we were talking about is are you privy to this one which I'm taking I were talking about oh I don't really love that one okay cool are you guys ever gonna fuck you mark fuck you that mark if're going to shut up. I pitched one to you, too. Oh Love that. Yeah, Nick Nick's are all great Titus is yours. Yeah, are we ever gonna do fun stuff again? Like we're ever gonna play clue again. Yes one one of Nick's is really good. It's similar similar vibe of that, okay? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, oh It'll be fun cool that. That sounds awesome. Wow. 7000 chicken nuggets. Okay, so Tuesday,

buried in chicken nuggets. Um, last round up last call. Who wants to go? Puck. I got Titus in. I'm going to go to the puck draw. Your tickets are done. You're out, right? I have. When is it a pretty major point pretty major. What is it on a Friday night. Yeah. It's Friday. It's tomorrow night seven o'clock in Milwaukee at Panther UW Panther arena in Milwaukee and you got me tickets. I will get them. You're not going. Don't do this. I'm getting I'm gathering information tomorrow night seven o'clock. I'll be dropping the puck I'm not fucking going that that was a little aggressive. No, I actually would like to go I would too It's just if I had a my car I would go that's what practice at five you have one

I don't have a car. Yes, you do. No, I don't even two weeks ago. I don't have my license Then how'd you drive a late Geneva two weeks ago bad boy? damn Yeah, I actually it does sound fun. I just said Geneva two weeks ago? I'm a bad boy. Damn. Yeah, I actually, it does sound fun. It will be. Now I'm starting, now I'm worried. It's just gonna be us? Well, my entire family. You will basically look like you're-

Oh, that's just gonna be weird. You will basically look like my oldest son. Yeah. Now I don't know, man. People will think that. Blutman wants to go as well. Is there anywhere we can watch this? Yeah, I just want to see the puck drop.

Besides there. Unfortunately, no. Are you gonna go dainty mode? I saw that clip I have thought to take a cameraman so just grab a cameraman Let's spin the office. What's coming so Berman can do it. Can you make some I go can you make some I go? I spin it once. Let's just see Is this gonna be a real like as soon as you drop it the players do it or is it a Ceremony yes, I am starting the I'm actually officiating the first period Is that a real question? Right I learned how to skate and I learned the rules of hockey. I'm gonna be officiating the first period

It's the same as the first pitch in baseball. Do you think when you throw the first pitch out there's a batter swing? That would be awesome. I don't watch college hockey. This isn't college hockey. So is this gonna be televised? Jay let's spin the wheel Come on. Jay. Come on. Let's spin the wheel This person can either get wet or go to the court or tell us what they do yep Well, this is okay. Oh, he's going all and invite him I don't think he's going. I'll invite him.

I feel like I'm going to invite him. Give me his number. Or, you invite him. Let me look at his number off your phone. I'll dial it. I don't want to give you his number. See, you're an asshole. I will.

You're a fucking asshole. I will. Relax. God. Don't get in a tizzy. You, you, you try to get tizzies. You aim for tizzy. Low tizzy. I'm sending you his number.

Oh, Che already peaked you to it. Oh. Tommy's on the. Hey coach, it's, it's Brandon Walker from, from Barstool. How you doing? Brandon Walker? Yeah. Tell me on air. I'm gonna tell him. Hold on. You gotta do that first. Coach, you're on the Yak right now. Oh really? Hey, what a great honor this is. Yeah. Love it. Hey, where you at right now? I'm in the Smoky Mountains. I'm up in Tennessee. That sounds awesome. Can you get to Milwaukee by tomorrow night? Milwaukee?

Wisconsin. No, why? Because I'm dropping the puck at a Milwaukee Admiral's hockey game and I wanted you to go with me. Really? Well, I can't do that this short notice, but I would just about do anything for you, Mr. Walker. Oh! Oh! Oh! Love him!

So maybe if I get something scheduled later this year with more advanced notice, you'll come? Absolutely. You can count me in. All right. Wow. He's going to get another puck drop. You treat Brandon Walker very well.

I appreciate that. No, I love you, man. I just, other than kicking field goals, are there's a much more. All right. All right. All right, coach. I'll holler at you, and we'll get something done then. I love it. All right, thanks. you man I just other than kicking field goals are all right all right coach well I'll holler at you and we'll get something done then all right thanks big yeah we're gonna go to Madison I just asked you to go to what's Saturday

this Saturday all right all right yeah that's right, fine. Enjoy the Smoky Mountains. All right, see you guys. Yeah, that's right. We will be in Madison on Saturday. All right, it's been it again, I guess. We got to find someone. Perfect. There we go. There we go. She's going to be excited. Perfect. Perfect. Get Ella Griffith here. She's going to be very excited. Where are you going? I'm going to go get her. Oh, okay.

But don't pre-talk. He's going to pre-talk. He's going to pre-talk it. You're going to pre-talk. You know he's going to pre-talk. All right, let's do this ad. We got a new sponsor alert. That's right.

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How to help you out with it? Yeah, I don't remember the box that I gave you today. Oh, I appreciate that I mean this guy fucking Well, I I saw free and I'm I appreciate that you were big You wanted he want he wanted to give the the fellas some merch and he got denied and then he asked me I got it done for I think it's crazy. They denied me. They were like no, no, you can't we don't like it But then who got you did he hats for you. You did. Thank you. You're welcome. It's crazy. They denied me Ella Mike okay. So what are you doing tomorrow night?

What's tomorrow Friday? Yeah, so that's a nothing. Oh, I'm going out. No, you're not. Why, when you say that? Yes she is. You didn't know what your whole night was. Yes she is.

Yes, you're going out to Milwaukee, Wisconsin. With who, for what? Me. Yeah, we're going to a minor league hockey game and you're coming with. Yeah, that's awesome. Congrats. Can I go? Thoughts?

Wait, Brandon, I want to go. It's just Ella. Oh shit. Yeah. Damn. Can we drink? Well, I mean, we're the guests of a minor league. Yeah, yeah, why not?

Yeah, we can drink. Yeah. Okay. What do you want to drink? Like beers? Uh huh. Vodka sodas. Vodka sodas. Yeah. At this minor league hockey game two hours from home. Yeah. Okay. All right, cool. So you're going? You also have the video. Yeah, I need it. It's not a choice. It doesn't sound like a choice. Well, we had we did spin the office wheel and it came up you. And you do work here, and we do need a cameraman to go with me.

Oh, I have to record you? Yeah. Yeah. But actually, you can't do that. I don't know how to do that. Do you know how to take video on a phone? Yeah. You do know how to do that.

OK. There you go. So you're going. Like, seriously? I don't understand what she's doing, big cat. You can say no. Oh. You can, yeah. Well what happens if I say no?

We will spin the wheel. Not like you won't go. We'll just spin it. Okay. But if it lands on you twice, you have to go twice. Yeah. But if- Okay. Yeah, and if you say no, that's because you have to really, really not want to go.

It's a- it's a night of honor for Brandon. Yeah. So if you say no, you have to- It has to be like the last thing you want to fucking do. Right. It has to be like super. So that you dread so much. I would hang out with you if it was closer.

So if you, so is it a no? It's a no. Oh. OK. While we have you here, Ella, what do you do? TikTok. Also, I'm wearing the combing outfit. She got me there because I don't go on TikTok.

Fuck. I don't wear this normally. I have the combing outfit on. Oh, OK. Oh, we would have never guessed Well shit, okay, yeah, I do tick-tock okay good sounds good. Yeah, yeah Accounts tick-tock oh one more thing Ella. You're fucking dead to me Get out of my sight

Didn't like that damn did she was she indifferent as fuck he's in different throughout the whole process we got to find someone for you Beef or Chuck? It's Chuck. Chuck. He's got a newborn. Yeah. All right, pass that one. He's got a newborn. Beef and Chuck are the same thing.

Oh my God, they are. Oh, he's on. Alyssa. Is that a real person? Yeah. Go get Alyssa. Yeah, go get Alyssa. Go get Alyssa, Graham. on. Alyssa. Is that a real person?

Yeah, go get Alyssa. Yeah, go get Alyssa. Get real Alyssa, Brandon. Brandon, you know Alyssa. Yeah, I do. No, Brandon. Yeah, yeah. Alyssa, you want me to go get Alyssa right now?

Yes. I'll go get Alyssa. Who's he coming back with? Not, I mean, he's going to have to use process of elimination. Oh, he's going to ask somebody who Alyssa is. Danny, go with him. Go with him, go with him. He shouldn't be allowed to, Danny, don't let him

ask anybody. You gotta just pick who you think Alyssa is. I'm gonna guess he's gonna come back with Kayla. Ooh, that's really good. I think that's what he's gonna come back with. I think he's gonna come back with... I think he knows. He back with... I think he knows. He should know.

Everyone should know. He doesn't. No chance. Alyssa's been on the show, I think she was selected by the wheel for something. Yeah, but still no chance. Still feels like no chance. He doesn't leave his little pocket of the office,

I feel like. Right. He doesn't branch out little pocket of the office, I feel like. He doesn't branch out too much. Right. Kyle, you're competing, right? Yeah. You've got to be a favorite to win, no? Well, I didn't sign up for everything. Wait.

What? You could do that? We had the option. What? I just picked bench and sprint. Oh. Oh, I thought you would just have to... No, I guess, I mean, that would make sense to have to do everything I

Will I just gonna win actually Nikki smokes he's been Smokes it yeah, he has Steve are you doing it? Yeah, you could win chef Donnie chef Donnie could win is there any foot measuring Oh, we got we'd better hope not Do you guys think Donnie could win is there any foot measuring oh we got we'd better hope not hmm Do you guys think Mr.. Jerry's Gonna be a hit yes, there's a chance like it the kid content is It's so mass like yeah, I can't fucking talk to ask somebody else I think it's because Jerry's really funny. Yeah, I think it'll work. Yes. Oh

It's good. Look already making me laugh Yeah Yeah, even that noise my kids come running just hearing that That's wait kids. It's time a hit with kids. Yes. Oh I don't know I hope I think it will be and it'll be funny for us. I have a role in it I'm excited. I Just want to be in it so that my kids

You're in mr. J. Yeah, right. I Feel like our audience is a lot of parents of young kids. Yeah Yeah, this will work and I think we're all desperate for him a break from the same old same old So it'll be fun for us to know the guy mm-hmm and What if like his toddler commenters are mean to They are the old fish mr. Jerry you won't I'm excited. I think first episodes taping on Monday if it actually hits it goes like dummy viral

Yeah, and then he's gonna do a test. He's gonna do a Case study so is it gonna be on the bar still made or its own no I think it's gotta be it's all I think that's better for success if it's on its own otherwise we get age restricted Auto-play are the kid chatters gonna ask him to piss dog during the episode probably There's a chance. This is infiltrated by adults. Yeah, is it gonna have a chat? I don't know I don't think so it can't comments should be turned off. Yeah, that should be that should absolutely be turned off Should definitely what's have you seen like the ideas for episode one? Uh yeah, and good really good Yeah. And? Good. Really good. Where's he filming at? Is he gonna? Green screen. Nice. Will there be like stuff for the adults?

I don't think so. He's gonna go straight for the kids. He's going straight for the kids. No, no like tongue in cheek. Oh, he could win. He's a beast. Yeah. Max! Look at that Planet Fitness logo on his arm. Scream Max! Scream. Sorry I hit him. Alright, that's cool. See ya. No, we haven't spun it.

I'm an idiot. Is someone cooking something? Yes, it smells really good. I look sick though. Odds winning? You do look sick. winning sick what no you're gonna win benchpress Who is gonna win the same smokes he's got to write you Are you why would I win it good? No I? can't benchpress

Kyle are you fast? Kyle's were very fieldless Pete Wilcompton is he fast he was in the NFL was in the NFL Probably for this field I'll be at the top not the very top to kill the bench Is there anything that would like ruin your day? If you get out benched my smokes if I get out benched by smokes that would I would be upset for a little I haven't mentioned so long what what if you get out benched by who else who could out benched by smokes. If I get out benched by smokes I would I would be upset for a little bit. I haven't benched in so long. What if you get out benched by, who else? Who could out bench me and I would be okay with it? Not okay. Well you have a competitive advantage in bench. Don't. Yeah no it needs to be said. I'm the lightest one. Nick are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you, are you are you are no it's not are you announcing? I am please bring up the competitive advantage and bench shorter arms shorter and should be the proportion arms a huge advantage I can barely bench thing. I was just so bad. I think it's a bigger advantage than just being a hundred pounds lighter than other people Yeah, shorter arms you have to finish half the amount of that like distance distance traveled

And you have and you have your bigger muscles, so you don't to go as far right? So that's not fair. Yeah, right your arms are so huge. We're so right and chest is so big yeah Shorter distance all you're cheating You are cheating I? Put oh he's got a smile on his face. Oh My god face. Oh my God. Wow. He did it. First try. No, it took a while. Oh, okay. What happened Danny up there? Was he uh I never I did it legitimately. Took way longer than you would

have thought. He was back and forth between a couple girls in sales and Alyssa. Alyssa was on the phone for a minute. That threw him off. Yeah, I made her get off the phone. Who were you close to picking? I? Thought he was gonna bring back Kayla probably Kayla then He was close to picking Erin okay, and you were calling her live

The word live on her phone She golf fan that might be a golf. Yes golf. Okay quick, Alyssa. Would you like to be closer with Brandon? We're on our way down here, Alyssa. Not necessarily. Okay. Off to a really bad start. Tomorrow night, I gotta go to Milwaukee to drop the puck for.

You gotta go, you're being honored. Tomorrow night, I get to go to Milwaukee. I'm being honored by the Milwaukee Admirals hockey team. I need someone from work to go and hold the phone to record. And I've chosen you to go with me. Would you like to go? I'm busy.

Or else I would love to. Okay, doing what? Now if you're gonna say it like that, you could've just said no, it would've spared my feelings a little bit. All right, no. Oh. Oh.

Okay. All right, thanks Alyssa. Thank you. Appreciate it. This has that same charm as dinner with wife. Yeah, it, okay. All right, thanks, Alyssa. I tried, thank you. Appreciate it. This has that same charm as Dinner with White. Yeah, it does. This might be harder. It's way harder.

It's two hours to a minor league hockey game. Did we find out who also has dropped the puck at these games? No. Oh, I don't. I'm just wondering. Oh, I don't know. Oh yeah, what fraternity are you turning?

Yeah, what are we talking, like what level of? Chris Catan, right? Well, Chris Catan. Oh, that's pretty big. Oh, his was Tuesday night, yeah. That's really big. really that's huge. Yeah Chris Kattan right into me. Yep. Yep. What's your favorite Chris Kattan roll? Oh Probably is it Jeepers cheap Mr. Peepers? Although he is in the more cowbell skit so See live in Milwaukee. I have no idea. I doubt it. Are we doing it again or am I?

Yeah, no, you got to find one person. Or we'll get Plutman. Plutman's going. No, he doesn't have a car. I don't know how he's pulling this off, but I know. Oh, that's perfect. That works out great. Oh, that works.

Done. All right, can you get Caitlin? Hey, Hank, can you tell Caitlin to come in? Caitlin. This might have to go in. Caitlin, we need you for something. Don't I get a choice? You don't want to?

Brandon's got a question for you. Hey, Caitlin, Brandon from the Yak. I got to go. Tomorrow night. Oh, no. Brandon is being honored tomorrow. Tomorrow night I'm being honored by the Milwaukee Admirals, my only hockey program. I'm dropping the puck ceremonially at their game as part of more, let me finish, as part of more cowbell night.

And I need someone to go from Barstool Sports. More Cowbell Night? I need someone, let me finish. I need someone to go from Barstoolsports.com to videotape this on their phone so I have record of it. I have chosen you to go, would you like to go? The only, he's leaving out one part, you'd have to hang out with his family.

We don't hang out. I know we don't, just if you could just say a quick no your brother's being honored I'm honored how are you gonna drop the puck have you decided probably daintily I'm gonna do a soul a little act you just hear what oh I cannot do someone to record it I can't do the splits and you know I do the split there's gonna be nobody else there. Will you pay for all of my stuff? All of your what? Just like my travel there, my food if I want food. Jersey, gotta get a jersey.

No. Why not? Because she doesn't have a car so I would have to drive her all the way back down here. I could get an Uber if you pay for it. A two hour Uber to Milwaukee? That'd be $400. Probably not. You got really southern on that one.

Yeah. Oh no. Katelyn, what's the proudest you've ever been of your large brother, Brandon? I mean, I don't know. We don't really talk. Yeah, we don't really communicate at all. Well, this is a chance to get to see him

honored in person. Since I got you here, when do I need to pay for this dog? Wait, another dog? Oh yeah, I have to figure that out. I'm trying to wait till summer. I thought you were getting it in March. Yeah, I might get it in March. Oh, I thought this was another dog for mama.

No, it's for her. Mama's dogs, they're all broken. Why do you have to pay for a dog? I bought my mama a dog for her birthday birthday and then this one over here said well I got a birthday coming up and I want a dog go to pause Yeah, she but she she wants a designer dog. No, I can I'm gonna ask pause if they have golden retrievers Yeah, they do. Yeah, there we go. So that's that I'll do that So then you just have to pay those fees and I'll pay those for my apartment building fee. I'll do that. So then you just have to pay those fees. And my apartment building fee.

I'll pay that too. Why? Because I want Paws to, it's my birthday gift to her when her birthday comes up. But then I have to get another birthday gift from you. When's your birthday? March 15th? We should all get you a dog. You didn't tell me happy birthday.

February 10th? Oh no. Brandon! Oh man. Oh my God. No! Yeah. Like this past February 10th? Yeah, he didn't tell me I had a birthday.

You weren't here. You still, you could have texted me. You were in Philadelphia. Yeah, go, go birds. Alright, clearly this isn't working and she's not allowed to go with me. Okay. Alright. Thank you, Caitlin.

Happy belated, Caitlin. Yep. And I also said I was going to buy her a $2,500 dog. Thank you Caitlin happy belated Caitlin. Yeah And I also said I was gonna buy her $2,500 dog. Yeah, yes. It's not about the money. It was gonna be I'll be devastated my brother Uber to Milwaukee is 160 bucks right now bad guy. Yeah devastated I'm not finding a whole lot of people that want to spend five do it started with you calling me an asshole because I Pretended not to be John Gruden's number for a second. Oh God, I can't call him back! Call him and just be like, hey, I'm just making sure you're definitely sure you can't make it.

Double-checking. Hey, I'm just... Say that again. Coach, I know you're on vacation, but just... I'm not bothering. I just want to let you know if you change your mind or not. You have his number? He was real nice to me.

Oh yeah. Yeah yeah he's the best yeah i actually think he would go if you like throw first pitch or something and you were being an asshole i joked for two seconds uh oh kaila kelsey oh go get kelsey really you know kelsey yeah she's the one with that goddamn dog yeah Oh. Really? You know Kelsey. Yeah, she's the one with that goddamn dog. Yeah. Not anymore. Nope.

Gonna get my ribs out. I don't think we're finding anyone who's gonna do this. There has to be one person. All right, Blutman's going. Yeah, I guess it's Blutman. It's Blutman, Brynn, it's fine. It's Blutman. Does Blutman have a car, you said? No, you have to bring both Blutman's going. Yeah, I guess it's Blutman. It's Blutman, Brent. It's fine. It's Blutman. Blutman have a car, you said? No, no, no. You have to bring both Blutman's. Yeah. Get Blutman in here and ask him.

How do you know? I think he's not just having somebody stretch it out. Oh, my God. Can we see video that Lucas go to that What oh is Blutman gonna be like yeah go or yeah, I guess where there oh my god who's stretching them out Harry Bogle ever heard of them? LB LB? Liam, tomorrow night I am being flown up to Milwaukee. What?

Where I will be honored by the Milwaukee Admiral's professional hockey team as their guest of honor in my honor. And I was wondering if you would like to attend said game with me and record my progress and my big night and it will be my honor if you were there while they honored me would you like to go are you getting you flying up there I'll be driving how would you like to go so this is a way to get me a ride What hmm because I don't have a ride not sure you're hearing the question. I'm hearing the question. Would you like to go? Yeah, you don't drive though

Well, how are you gonna get there? That's why I was saying what about a wheel to see who has to drive Blutman? But they don't have to go in? Oh, drop them off. Pick them up. You buy them dinner while the game's going on. You drive him up, and somebody comes up and gets them. You don't want a road trip, Brandon? You actually would be great road tripp. You didn't have to talk.

Me and Connor Griffin, great time in the Dakotas. My problem is I'm carrying my wife and four kids, so you would be stuffed in the back seat between my two youngest boys. So? Wait, is Titus going? Yeah, Titus can bring him. Yeah.

Yeah. You don't want him bringing you. Uh, uh, Brandon, take Blutman. What'd you like to go? Yeah. I feel like there's a train from Chicago to Milwaukee. Train. I'm saying this driving thing, you can take a train.

Why is he driving? He's right, you got Train. I'm saying this driving thing, you can take a train. Why is he hollering? He's right, you got Italian. I got it! Could you check your guy? Why is he hollering? You can get a train. That was equally autistic and Italian.

There's a train! Baldwin, do you want to ride with me? I forgot about the choo-choo. Sure, man. You want to go to the romantic dinner my wife and I were going to go to? Right. Hmm. Yeah.

Before the game? You want to ruin that really? You know what I that's that's mark Tyson. I think you know what I think you just do a selfie video I'll just get Tommy to do it. Yeah that works Just get Tommy or if tightest is there he'll do it. Yeah tightest happens to be there I guess that we could on that from the beginning. This was fun. Yeah, I can't You're going it's not my contract if I'm I can't film you a production Yeah, you have some of your production contract that doesn't start being mean to him, right?

It changes everything if I tightest and I can swap contracts if you want. Oh, I'd be fine doing that Lucas throwing in something And you're also talking with the button He's a detestable one Very unlikable physically I just oh The way he carries himself All right, thanks woman, I'll record you Brandon will make sure on but if if you you have to go zesty mode Yeah I'm not I'm not gonna record this moment for your personal files

Just so you can like jerk off to it a year from now about the time you're honored to This has got to be content for the yak You have to okay. All right if it, if you can promise me it is, I will record you. I can't promise you I'm going Zesty mode. Why? The mood has to be right for Zesty. I can't force it. You make the mood. You can't force Zesty.

You're the vibe starter. Are you going to be wearing the pants? Oh, you gotta wear the pants! I don't know if I'll wear the pants. How could you not wear the pants? You're going to try to look hot and drop it cool Brandon. That's what he's gonna do. Yep He's gonna dress normally and stylish and drop it cool. Look at me You're being honored, right? If you go out there and just you're Brandon Walker. You're just wearing regular pants. You're not zesty

It's gonna be a snooze fest snooze fest You've got to go out there and be a showstopper people got to walk out of that game being like did you see that puck drop? Who is that guy? I need to know more about if you do poorly I promise you you'll never drop a puck in this town again Or that town or in life any people are desperate for a little okay alright alright I'm taking it all want to see a show. Can we get you maybe some sparklers? Some spark yeah fireworks you bring your own fireworks You hand the the the hockey player a sparkler.

Here, hold that. I'm going to drop this damn puck over here. All right. I'd let you do cool, Brandon, if you do sunglasses and a cigarette. Oh, that would also be cool. Okay, that's a good compromise. I'll do something. If you promise to do one of those, I will drive myself and Blutman.

If I'm doing anything, I'm doing dainty, I think. Sparklers? No sparklers. no spark why about like a ribbon Oh ribbon would be a tassel like a streamer yeah Brandon you if you do dainty and like half acid that's the worst case yeah that guy might be what was that half-assing dainty you're the dainty or you're not what about a really long cape Really long Like one my astronomical We have to get you a cape One mile where am I to get a mile? Where am I going to get a mile long cape?

Brandon, imagine the impact. Imagine this guy walked with a mile long cape. They might have to cancel the game. I've got to find you a cape. What's the longest cape I can get between now and tomorrow? I'm going to try. I'm going to look. I'm going to look. Let's call a tailor right now and say, we need a cape that's one mile. You can use any fabric, patchwork it. We could can have blood men holding it like they do for the bride

I'll consider cape heavily, okay, but I don't know how we're gonna NBA 3 cape no like like I found a long one 90 to 100 feet. How long is that? That's not even long That's pretty long. That's not long enough. I need ten times Just a long ass cape oh you'd look so cool Who buys these you yeah All right, I'm gonna find I'm'm gonna get, I'm gonna buy you a couple cape options. I don't need multiple cape options. Yeah, you do.

Can you just order like 100 yards of a fabric? And just drag it? Capes are easy. Yeah, you just gotta like buy it. Yeah, just buy a spool of fabric and tie it around Brandon's neck. Like the entire thing. Yeah.

All right. But I don't wanna rule out Dainty. Dainty. I'm picturing Cape. I got to feel it. My sons, my aunt. Dainty will go viral. Myle Cape will make you. They'll talk about it. The team will go on their next road trip and the team they play the next will be like, so you all have the Cape guy, huh? They might, they might. You might be hired to drop pucks across they might change the man

with the Iowa Milwaukee capes I'm getting a couple keep options I hope they get here in time I need you in a cape I feel like you're getting a long cape but not what Nick is asking for. What did Chris Catan do? He didn't add any. Oh he's Chris Catan he thinks he's made it because he was on Saturday Night Live for six years. He has a six mile long cape. I doubt he can even shoulder one. Is there a record for longest cape? Who else do you play? You play Mango? Yeah, Mango. You played at the Roxbury? Mr. Peepers? Yeah. The longest cape is only 182 feet. That would be the geographic cape. We gotta get you a long cape. That's worn by an Arabic man it's not too I think we plan the Cape a little late

shall I postpone till I can get caped and dropping the puck Brandon Walker from Barstool Sports who is also wearing the world's longest cape must be important wow I'd have to almost be funny. They announced it seriously I'd almost have to walk owner of the longest cake in the world You know him from mostly sports. It's brand And then you walk out and then just blutman's pool in the cake Well, there's a drumroll plane Well, there's a drum roll playing the whole time. You're starting to like it, aren't you? Oh, I like the cake from the start.

I think their management would love it. I think they're hoping people do fun fun. They would definitely love it. You have to do something though, Brandon. I'll do something. You gotta do something. I'm not driving up there. Y'all know me.

Making a whole weekend out of it. I'm Brandon fucking Walker. How did you have the whole weekend? It's a whole week now. We're going to the farmer's market. You keep adding things. All right. I got a couple capes coming tomorrow. Test them out. You know what? Even if whatever, if they don't get here in time, we probably need capes anyway. Yeah, I agree. Some capes. We should be a cape show. The boys are already out there running their 40s. Yeah, we should wrap up.

Everyone tune in. We could have made the 40 a 30. 20, 7. 28. No one would have known. No, it would have been nice. We could have just, we didn't need to make it 40. But they did prop up an air mattress at the end by the bar.

So the line at the 40, the 40 line is about a foot and a half from the bar. Right. Yes. But they did put the mattress there so you can... Awesome. A very thin, thin air mattress that you will surely run right through. All right. than air mattress that you will surely run right through. All right.

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All right all right get that get that wheel to spinning. Let's spin it. Side note, Wiener Circle invited me to their Bad Bitch Big. Oh, spin it. Side note, Weiner Circle invited me to their bad bitch baby. Oh yeah. Kate's going to a fat coochie contest. On Tuesday. Oh my God. Looking forward to it. Said bring your puff muffin.

Is that what they call it? Yeah? Would you rather come in first or last? I think first. Yeah, but that would have to be fat as fuck. You'd be a little hurt if your coochie wasn't fat enough for their contest. Third place would have to feel so good. They'd look at you and start laughing like, get this, get this.

That is a possibility, but looking forward to it. Also somebody DM'd me and said Vanne Zach had stole his GameCube in 2006. Oh no. Or 2016. But you know what? That's true. That's pretty late to steal a GameCube. I don't no. Or 2016. But you know what? That's true. That's pretty late to school.

That's late, Cube. I don't know. That's classic Vanne Zach here. We'll have to confront him about that. Put the Doberman on the case. Oh, yes. Yeah. Oh, wait.

Oh yeah, we're just, dating show is now until they come out, right? Oh yeah, I guess we gotta, we'll have to figure out when we're gonna do it. We'll talk about it later, but. We got pro day and then we got We gotta let come, so maybe the maybe the following week following with I like to drag this out as long as possible the fall Yeah, Labor Day fall is wedding season. Yeah, let's wait until Mackenzie gets a boyfriend Okay, and then fly these guys out have her current boyfriend have to be in it

We'll give them a long ass cape We also have the pro pogo sticker coming out. Oh, yeah He's a man he can pogo man can when is he coming? I think it's the tenth All right all right, let's come on. See ya. Everyone tune into the combine, it's going to be great. See you tomorrow.