The Yak - We're Hunting Down Cheah's Piece | The Yak 3-5-24

Episode Date: March 5, 2024

Ting tong.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak

Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, TJ, hold that up. It's the act. It's the act. Hey, y'all. Hey. Welcome back to the act. I shouldn't be doing this, but good to see you all. Oh. Hey.

What's up, brother? Good to see you. He's here. Good to see you all What an absolute pleasure Can I be the first to say that this show has been on Fucking fire recently You guys are, this might be a

Dare I say a golden age of the No don't do that I know what you're doing He is doing that What the fuck? I can't big up my Friends? I know exactly what you're doing What am I doing Nice try

Diagnose it then Nice try I'm bigging up my friends I think that you guys Have been so fucking We've been so hot recently There it is We've been missing one piece

There we go And Sass isn't here I know And I feel bad about that But uh The Clemmer shit The fucking

Popcorn machine Everything has been so fucking good. Genuinely, congratulations. No, no, I'm not taking that. Take this. I'm not taking that. Take these fucking congratulations. Last we saw you, Roan.

By the way, Roback.com, promo code YAK, 20% off for first purchase. Joggers. Zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. Roback.com, promo code YAK. Last we saw you, Roan, was at the Super Bowl when you were devastated by the Pat Bev news. And we were elated and said, we'll see you more. And now we're seeing you more.

Yes. See? It's come to fruition, for sure. I just drove down from Milwaukee today. I've been flying out to Milwaukee once a week. Yeah. Which is great. How was your meeting with your real estate agent this morning it was really good there's some nice

really nice places in like buffalo grove long grove that have some good acreage and right in between you can get up so easy it's so accessible i drove past brandon's spot on the way down thank you beautiful yeah it was a nice breakfast. Incredible. So much sausage. So much sausage. A fat plate of sausage. Yeah, it's great out here.

Midwestern folk are the best humans in America. Have you learned anything, like anything you didn't know about Milwaukee that kind of caught you off guard? Yeah, you don't have to follow the traffic laws there. Oh. It's like carte blanche. Not a whole lot of people there in the middle of the town. Is it a lot of Somalians? Or is that Minneapolis?

Minneapolis. You're thinking of Eritreans. Ah, there's a lot of Eritreans there. Very oppressed. They have some of the worst freedom of press in the world. That's right. Yeah, exactly. It's terrible.

But, I mean, they come to Milwaukee for- Beautiful people, though. The Eritreans. The Eritreans. High foreheads. Have you gone to any of the spots that Dahmer used to frequent? I heard that there's a place- That would just be gay bars.

Yeah. Gay bars. I've been to a bunch. There's a steakhouse called Five O'Clock or something like that that Dahmer used to- It's like Dahmer's associated with this steakhouse. I don't know. Would that mean if he likes the taste of that, then that steak would taste the most like man?

Yeah. I got to try it. I don't know. I basically have been flying in, going to the game, and flying out the next morning. But I said, why not pop down and see my guys today and go? What time did you record last night? Like one.

Jesus. It's nothing. That's nothing. You guys stay up last night? Like 1. Jesus. It's nothing. That's nothing. You guys stay up all night for freaking streams like my guys Clemmer's doing right now. Clemmer and Coleman. We're in the torture era of Barstool. Yeah. All right.

Realize that. We're just going to keep increasing the amount of time and grueling activities. It's going to just be the Truman Show eventually. Yeah. Right? Just full time live. The Clemmer one is Clemmer decided to do it and it's been phenomenal. I think

that one's going to peak obviously around like Thursday Friday when he gets closer to 100 hours. Coleman is actually just in a torture chamber. I don't know if you guys tuned in. There's nothing he can do. He's trying to name a baseball player. So Kirk came up on Monday's show where they were naming the top I think it

was Coleman has a uh he'll like bring they'll bring up something he's one of those guys like oh yeah I know them it's like he doesn't know them um they had him like try to name the AL East teams he's a Yankees fan and he said the Tigers so he doesn't know anything about sports he couldn't name the AL East teams yeah he named all of them except the rays and said the tigers instead um but he didn't know who joe tory was he was on the baseball podcast he was on the baseball podcast i think he has a yankees uh license plate oh it came up the top 10 home run hitters and kirk was like you're not leaving until you name them all he couldn't get eight and ten he finally got frank robinson last night because he literally took out a whiteboard and listed all the first names he could think of and all the last

names he could think of and just kept on saying them back and forth. So he eventually just said Frank Robinson. That's pretty impressive. Yeah. But yeah, well it was crazy. A lot of grit. And now he still can't get Jim Tomei.

I got in contact with Jim Tomei this morning. His wife called me. It was like, Jim's golfing. It's his day off. His wife then called into Kirk's show and was giving him hints, and he still couldn't get it. Oh, man. What was she saying?

She was like, she listed all the teams he played for. She accidentally said the name Jim a couple times. Kirk said the name Jim a couple times.irk said the name jim a couple times back he said jim tommy who did coleman think she was she he said he was like it's the wife of the player oh god and he still hasn't gotten i mean he's at a point where why how would it magically come to yeah he doesn't know the name last night i was watching he had jim and he had he was saying t names and he still couldn't get it. But Tomey's not a common name.

He's not going to say Tomey. He was saying, like, Marissa Tomey. Do you think if you told him it was Jim T, he would – No, I don't think he's ever going to get it. I actually think he's going to die in there. Can you see where they're at? I think he's going to die in there. Because, KB, you're like the master hint giver with names.

What would you say to lead him to Jim Tomey? Is it Tomey or Tomey? T-H-O-M-E Like the big Tomey That's hard Does he have to write it or he just has to say it? Jim Toe Fizzed Foot

Metaphizzed Foot I don't even know how does that work? Gym. Yeah. Gym toe. Meta-tarso. Toe me.

Oh. Beer me. I don't know. Beer me a toe. I would just tell them something like that. Some shit like that. Yeah, see, they've just been doing this for... I think they're on hour, like, 29?

So did Coleman go into the show expecting to be in the show? No. Okay. It just happened okay that's way worse yeah and he's just been there and it's like they're never gonna get it he's never gonna get it talking to Jim Tomey's wife this morning was so funny she's like yeah I woke up and he was just trending on Twitter and I was like yeah you didn't do anything wrong there's just a guy trapped in a studio and he can't leave until he says your husband's name kirk also said it on yeah

multiple times by accident it's nice that like if any of us ever have marital problems we can just start a stream and just kind of take a week away from yeah what's next after this clemmer and this is clemmer so this is yeah we are counting rotting rice so So, yeah, we are in our torture phase. This is crazy. So, Clem's only toy was tampons and pads, and then he lost them in a challenge? Yeah. He was really upset. What do you mean his only toy? I think he's counting in tens.

He has until tomorrow at breakfast to count this rice. Looks like he's doing lines of rice. There's no correct answer. Yeah, there's no chance. Nobody counted it. No one else counted. He can't be right. They don't know how many grains of rice there are.

Yeah, he should have thought of that. Or the person that counted could have easily been wrong. I love his little cowlick. It's really cute. A little nerdy. His whole stance is cute. He is precious right now. Yeah, he is. Like Gollum. Is that what you mean by precious?

Can you play the sound real quick? Yep, that's it. Grim. 2,800. Blue Jays. The Orioles also added Corbin Burns. I know they're not going to have Kyle Brydish. Oh, he's just doing baseball preview while he kills the ball. No one's in there?

No one's in there. And he's not reading the chat? No. So he's talking to himself? Yes. People were furious that he unplugged the speaker. Did you see that last night? Yeah.

Connor Henderson for a full season. He's going to have a better year than he had last year. Does he win anything? No. He's just doing it. No, that's the beauty of it, too, because people were accusing, they're like, this is torture. You have to stop this.

When the Frank the Tank locked up, audio was being played. I was like, you guys don't understand. He decided this. And can leave at any time. Can leave at any time, and he wanted to do this. I think it would be nice, though, if we, like uh i don't know open a gofundme or and there's like money waiting for him when he gets if he gets out or something like that or like is there a way that he can get incentivized positively about this without you having to dig into your

pockets uh i don't know don't do it don't do it you just got 25 i would i would donate to like a gofundme or even his own vemo yeah yeah because I went and checked in on the live and like the most common comment was, what's he get? And then everybody's like, nothing. Nothing. But he broke it like five hours in. Yeah. I think I do that every day is just go five hours without interacting. Yeah.

He and it is also just the fact that these both these streams are happening at the same time is so funny because Chris Clemmer knows everything about baseball. And so he's... Right. And Coleman knows everything about rice. Yeah. And they're just stuck. It's incredible. A torture phase.

Jerry's doing a stream tonight, right? Yeah. So Jerry... Tonight we will have three streams going on at the same time. Has Jerry announced what his stream is? Yeah. Okay, yeah. I'm excited for this.

Jerry is going to stream tonight, Jerry After Dark, and he's not going to leave until he breaks Caitlin Clark's record. When does this end, man? I'm really – We should just have our asses beat in a dungeon. Yeah. That's what it's going to be. Now this one, it actually started because I was,

I came up with this one, and I was going to have him try to do LeBron's record. 40,000 points. And then we tested it yesterday, and I was like, this would never end. But he has to do the same amount of threes? Yeah, same amount of threes, same amount of free throws. I think it's like 600 free throws, 500 threes.

No, it's like 800 free throws. Oh, my God. And 500. It's 762. It took Mark 15 hours to hit 1,000. Yeah, it's like 800 free throws. Oh, my God. And 500. It's 762. It took Mark 15 hours to hit 1,000. Yeah, but I wasn't shooting constantly. You also weren't stopping to shoot threes. You were making constantly.

That's a big thing. Yeah, but I, yeah. The threes, 509 threes. He's got to be. That'll be exhausting. What do you think the best strategy is? Is it to knock out all the threes? Well, this is the problem.

I was talking to Jerry about it. I think you knock out the threes and the free throws and then you end with the layups for the two point. Oh, I think you go reverse. But for content, you have to go reverse. And I also think the layups, you would think if you warm up, will make you better at shooting. That's a

warm up drill. See the ball go. Kyle, you've got to get glasses, man. You go Spider-Man pose every time. Well, it's harder than you think to get glasses yeah i have like nine pairs i'd end with the free throws i would end with the layups when you're tired i just be right next my math it would take him five to six hours to do the threes alone oh god he we tested yesterday that is 1.5 threes a minute is that too little or too much that's too little he he we we tested it yesterday. That is 1.5 threes a minute. Is that too little or too much? That's too little. We tested it last night.

I think he hit 18 threes in about five minutes, so he was shooting well. For a long-term pace without breaks? Yeah. You think he can get two to three threes a minute? Yes. He's saying seven and a half hours. I think three threes a minute is definitely doable, especially because you have a rebounder. I know. a minute is definitely doable. I want to do this.

Especially because you have a rebounder. I know. I want to do this. I want to do this. I miss the free throws so much. I know. I want. And think about it.

It's just shooting a ball and getting someone to rebound for you. That's the most fun you can have. And when is Caitlin Clark's next game? Yeah, he's going to have to do it again. Right. He's going to have to restart. He has to keep doing it. I also don't know if he knows that he has to do the same amount of free throws

Because I just asked him that And he was like no I just do layups No he has to do the same amount of free throws I'll make sure that's a fact Who's going to be the first person to miss a major life event How's closing vacation Yeah I don't know That's a good question

I think whenever we do the Jerry Tone of 500 Yeah That's only like 77 hours What is the Jerry Tone of 500 Yeah That's only like 77 hours What is the Jerry Tone of 500? We're toying with the idea of doing 500 miles on go-karts On the track, on the court 9,000 laps

We're on a trajectory that's similar to ISIS beheading video We're going to start producing that For terrorists I was going to have CPS take my terrorists. Yeah, we're in our torture. Yeah. I was going to have CPS take my kids tomorrow

and see how hard it is to get them back. What a challenge. Maybe. Sponsored by Taki. It's hard to get them taken away. That will be the first part

of the challenge. Yeah. Try the hardest part. Yeah. That's really. Come take them. Yeah. That will be the first part of the challenge. Try the hardest part. Come take them. Titus, are your pants in person they look blue, but on camera they look purple. I don't know. These are some Robacks

that I... It's like a little optical illusion. You're right. I'm the only one that has this color. I have it. I don't have that color either. They gave me black and they gave me what I thought was blue. I thought it was slate. They wanted you to have your own color. It's like a pimp my ride type of thing.

Oh, yeah. It looks very different on the TV. I'll do a blue and gold dress. Everybody's. I mean, Milk's color is true to the TV. Translucent. Yeah. I got a surprise for you guys.

Yay. Yes. What could it be? I wish I hadn't said yay. Ice cream. I got a surprise for you guys yay I think it's my favorite shirt that we've ever created I had Triggs draw it up on Sunday TJ it is live right now I'm excited I think it's my favorite shirt we've ever created everyone please go buy it you want to pull it up TJ

this is an instant classic. Kind of a where were you. Oh, my God. Pro Day 2024. Oh, man. Oh, look at Clemmer. Yeah. It's a beauty.

Yeah. You got Clemmer on the bench press. Chubby bunny. Yeah. It's a beauty. Yeah. You got Clemmer on the bench press. Mincy with his face in the apples. Chubby bunny. And the grilled cheese. Oh, it's beautiful. Yeah. That's awesome. So everyone go please buy.

That's so damn good. Mincy Pro Day. Mincy Pro Day. Now you can own it. Where's Stephen Chay's beautiful ass? He's at Disney World. Disney World. And making mistakes on his first mock draft already.

No. Really? Don't tell me that. Did you know he lost all five days last week? Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, he lost every single day, the prop bets. Oh, no. Yeah. That's bad.

Every day. He's eyes cold. The data is failing. Yeah, he did his first mock draft. He said with T. Higgins hitting free agency, the Bengals will draft a wide receiver. He got franchise tagged like three weeks ago. A while ago.

Yeah. That's fucking tough. That's embarrassing. I mean, well, Blutman is now. Yeah, it's on Blutman, too. He released his own. But I'm saying Blutman is now the mock draft of record, I think, for Barstool.

Stephen Chay is kind of more of a hobbyist, kind of sideshow act. Yeah, he is. He's there just to laugh at. We need to get Blutman on this draft show, Brandon. We need to get Blutman involved somehow. We can get a ticker. He does a ticker on Mostly Sports. We can get the Blutman.

You want more? I want more. I want more Blutman. Because he probably knows more than the rest of us. Agreed. About draft shit. He knows a lot. He's with Mincy right now. Did you know that? No, I didn't know that. Do we have an update from them?

What are they doing? They're at a tennis tournament. It looks beautiful, by the way. It's in California. Are you distracting Mincy from something? Did you send him out there? – is there a big announcement coming that you can't let him spoil? There's a big guest in the office that we can't have Mincy.

Yeah, that's true. But we had – no, I think Hank just – we had like an ad buy for the tennis tournament. He was like, who better to go than Blutman and Mincy? The dynamic duo. Yeah, they are. Mincy is a state tournament – a state tennis champion. Yeah, I forgot that. From high school. Yeah, because he was Mincey is a state tennis champion. Yeah, I forgot that.

From high school. Yeah, because he was great at ping pong too, right? He could stand upright. There was a wall there. There was a wall there. He was solid. There was a wall keeping him upright. He wasn't one of the better players in the office,

but he certainly wasn't one of the worst. He was one of the players. He definitely was one of the players. Mook, you've been on the road. Yes, sir. Where have you been? Miami. He definitely was one of the players Mook you've been on the road Yes sir Where you been? Miami and then I've been with Francis and Sass Wherever they go

Madison coming up Sass doesn't drink anymore? He's still off it But then he went to Shane's SNL party And he broke sobriety In a big way I'd imagine He broke it for that specific occasion how many ways did he break it i don't know but i heard he was boofing i heard he was

boofing backstage with michael che yep i heard him and bo and yang were fucking we're boofing but he didn't understand why i was insulted that he wouldn't drink with me every time that i asked him to drink but he would drink on that occasion yeah no that would be insulted no he would never get that though he's like those guys are more important to me yeah that's what i should i guess understand where i am in the pecking order he should be insulted that you don't understand him i want to be friends with him so badly but he's removed anything where he and I can share friendship. He won't do anything with me. There's no part of him that wants to hang out.

All he wants to do is fish. All he wants to do is fish alone. I'm envious of you, Mook. I feel like you spend more time with Sasson than I do. I spend a good amount of time with him, but we don't do anything. But I also heard that when he was in Colorado, even though he brought you and Francis on the road with him, he just ditched both of you guys and slept at his boy's house on the couch the entire time.

Well, we had a nice condo in Denver and he chose to sleep on Bo's couch. Oh, he doesn't like anyone. Yeah. No, he's not friends with anyone. No, he doesn't like you guys. Does he ever text you guys first? No. No. All the time. What? Yeah. Damn. Pull up the log. Shit.

You got broken up with him and you don't even realize and i'm still like sending him like memes oh no it's super embarrassing like a puppy it's so embarrassing he's showing his friends it's like look at roan yeah desperate stinky cologne yeah how many times can roan text without me responding responding? It's the sea of blue. It's so fucking embarrassing. You're a drinking game for him and Bo and the SNL guys. Every time you text, they take a shot. Yeah, he's got Mikey Day fucking dying laughing at me, desperately trying to text him.

It sucks so bad. You didn't go to Shane's party? I was in Florida. Oh. I was in Florida. I wasn't invited to that either. Jerry, you got to hit the same amount of free throws. Yeah, I know.

Okay. All right. He knows. I feel like I took Jerry's parking spot today. No, he parks in the handicapped spot. Yeah, he parks in the handicapped spot. That's where I park. Oh, okay.

Yeah, then you did. Wait, Jerry parks in the handicapped spot? Yeah, every day. It's kind of questionable. It is. Yeah. It's very questionable. No, it's not kind of.

It's a dick move. Yeah, we have a handicap spot. Do we have a handicap? That's not even a moral gray area. I don't think we have a handicap employee. Who's the total darkness? Well. Mincy.

Let's allot this parking spot aptly. Who is the- I don't think Mincy would probably miss it every day. Kate can't walk two steps. Yeah, that's true. Kate should get this. Where do you park, Kate? I park the farthest away.

I do. It's a tight squeeze. It's stressful in this parking lot. You don't want to be the one to hit another employee's car. I think that's every parking lot. That's true. More so here. This is one of those lots where you don't want to smash

another car. One of those crazy lots you don't want to hit your car in an accident. How fucked is your back? Pretty fucked. So fucked. Pretty fucked. I have an MRI tomorrow. What are you going to do?

Oh, nice. Yeah. What is it? Is it like a slipped disc or something like that? Or bone on bone? I don't know. I have a crazy theory that I have osteoporosis. Oh, no.

That just sounds cool. That happens to women, right? You might be right. Somebody sent me an article titled, My Daughter Drank My Bones. And I was like, what? And this lady had the same timeline, same story as me. And I don't want to cuss on the show, but I'm breastfeeding and pumping my tits. So you've got no iron.

And no calcium. And so if you don't have enough calcium in your body and your breath meat, it all leaves your body and your spine like crumples. That's what killed my dog. Really? Your dog died of osteoporosis? Died of...

You were sucking its titties? The milk it was producing for the youngsters, yeah. Well, so then your bones start to break. I remember that. That was sick. Your dog died of being too milky. Eclampsia, which is they get too overheated because they don't have any iron or calcium left in their body because it's all gone to the youngins. Is that really what happened?

Yeah. So now every time I bump something, like I tripped on my sunstool in the kitchen, I had to go to the ER because I was like clawing on the floor screaming. Oh, man. You have hemophilia. I can't hold my kids. I can't walk very well. It's like, yeah. So I should have that spot.

Where's Jerry? Yeah. What's Jerry's defense? It's the closest spot. It is the closest spot. I get it. Are you taking pills? I can't because I'm breastfeeding.

I can't take muscle relaxers because they go into the milk and stuff. So I'm taking ibuprofen so much that I feel nauseous all the time. But I've lost a ton of weight. Let's get this kid on the formula. Well, I'm trying. We're trying. Yeah. But it's tough.

They reject it and they're screaming. I didn't realize you were just going through absolute hell every day just to get here. It's a nightmare. Yeah, I can tell. I realize. Let's have her run the gauntlet. No. I'm fine this actually no you're not fine you couldn't hug wrong yeah you couldn't get up to you just said you bumped

into a coffee table had to go scratch your claw around you're not fine it's bad it's bad jesus finally my biggest fear is that the mri shows nothing and it's like you're it just says you're a pussy yeah it's just very very very very close to throwing eggs at her from the balcony yes yeah i'll tell you we were very i'll tell you what kate here's what we'll do who who parks in the second to furthest i'll give up my spot for kid no oh my god who parks in the second to further spot away because we'll get them to move and you can park in that that's a nice compromise they said it's good for me to walk i'm going to pt three times a week and i don't know if it's making it better or worse.

I'll walk you in a room and see how long you can stand up. Actually, yeah. I kind of live in it right now, my own torture show. Oh, my God, Kate. It's all good. At what point is it just like you do steroids or something like that, like full on? That'll help. It all goes in the middle.

I should. I just want to point this out. I don't know what's worse. Well, I know it's worse, Kate's body failing her, but the fact that we needed Roan to come to be like, Kate, are you okay? And we just hit it. Every day we just, no one ever asked her.

Yeah, he asked her about her. Roan just asked one simple question. We were like, he's dying. We had no idea. My bad for asking. I shouldn't have brought it up. You fucking ruined it for us. We were all having fun.

She's in a torture chamber every single day. I'd like to die. And now you put that on us, which is fucked up. No, we got to live with it. You're going to leave and we got to deal with this shit. And now we feel guilty. You motherfucker. Yeah, I just really poisoned the ointment right now.

That was a dirty dirty trick we almost gave her the second worst parking spot this has actually been the highlight of my day every day so besides my kids there we go no you don't they're not here but uh like what how bad could it be if your kids are if you're on like a bunch of muscle relaxers and your kids are drinking your breast milk like what are they just gonna grow up addicted to muscle relaxers and your kids are drinking your breast milk? What are they just going to grow up addicted to muscle relaxers? Sleep great. Sounds like they'd be cool as fuck. Honestly, thinking about it. John heads.

Yeah. Would they be like blue faces in Chris Sean Rock's kids? What are they like? I can't imagine. That's bad. What was that sentence? Their kid has a great idea. You know what I'm talking about?

I'm on that algorithm. They've got to be the baddest kids of all time. No, no. That kid's like 11 months, but still is like two months. Like looks and acts wise. It's getting younger. It's getting younger. And it's like, I mean, it's almost sad, but like the eyes are like drifting apart.

Oh, my God. This is bad. It's like currently getting worse fetal alcohol syndrome. Every time it breastfeeds. Yeah. Oh, my God. The bottles like double count. And who's this person? Blueface and Krishan Rock, the two worst people

on the internet I think. There's like a couple that just would like fist fight each other. But I think she was in the wrong. She's missing a front tooth? She was like a college sprinter. Is she Blueface or Krishan Rock? And she was so cute. The before picture of her before she met Blueface is like astounding.

I don't know what's going on. Oh, you're in the wrong algorithm. Do you have a Blueface? So confused. Wait, is that the guy who was at the, he got the strippers at the Rams game? Yes. That was YG, I thought. No, that was Blueface.

That's Blueface. That's the Panthers game. That's the Panthers game. Okay. You know. All right. Lovely, faithful girlfriend is... I don't know if she's with him anymore.

He made a bunch of girls jump her at his own concert in front of all these cameras crazy. She's with Lil Mabu now. Yes. Oh, that's not true. Well, good for him. That might be publicity that she's with Mabu, but Mabu's a white guy who will treat her right.

Who she could be the shit out of is what it comes down to at the end of the day. Well, I had sent Pat. Pat is an edibles guy, and he dips his toe in all kinds of things. And I was like, do you have any edibles or something? Because I was so desperate for a couple nights that I was like, I'll take whatever and I'll give the baby formula. And he was like, here, take these. It's only whatever. And I was just taking them'll take whatever and I'll give the baby formula. And he was like, here, take these. It's only whatever.

And I was just taking them without looking at the bottle. And TJ, I sent you pictures. I finally find the bottle the one day. What? Love drops. They're lip base pills for arousal. I was like, what? He's like, I swear it's weed.

It's just whatever. He fucking drugged you. He was like, no, no, it's not like that i just like i know it has whatever and i was like okay well what effect did it have on you probably nothing because that's what they do these days they're like here's an upper weed it's like no that's yeah it is all the same yeah i didn't feel anything also it accentuates my pain. You feel more deeply. I was sitting in the chair and I was like, I just, hmm, hmm. Yeah, and I didn't feel horny at all.

But it was shocking. I was like, what? Arousal. The hell is this? Being in tremendous pain but also super horny would be the worst combo. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, we're strictly hand jobs right now.

Why are you doing dual? Who's the other? I don't want to get into my personal life. Wraps around this. She seatbelts it. Good for Pat. Thanks for asking, Roan. I have a question about the algorithm with white women.

Sure. Is Kate Middleton missing? Oh, yes. What? She's been missing for a while. You don't know where she is? No one has seen her for like- Since before Christmas, I think.

Yeah. They think that she's either dead or Brazilian butt lift. Or that- No, there's another theory. A royal's- Pippa's ex-boyfriend just died in like a mysterious way or something, And they think that he is the secret father of her latest kid or something. And so he disappeared. And then she was seen today wearing sunglasses.

Wait, Kate was? Pepper or Kate? But it was really pixelated and people were like, that's not her. She had big sunglasses on. TK, let's see this Kate Middleton. Yeah. Yeah, this is like a big story. She had a mystery surgery that was apparently pretty intense where she was in the hospital

for like two or three weeks. But nobody knows what the surgery was. And then she hasn't been seen ever since. And Charles got cancer, right? Bad cancer, right? He was so healthy. And the queen also the Charles's wife just said she's doing duties now. She's like, yeah, Camilla just announced that she's not doing shit anymore.

You're like, crisis time. Yeah. For the Royals. She's the one that wanted, no. Charles wanted to be a tampon in her pussy. Yeah. Yes. And she gets blamed for Diana sometimes, too.

Yeah. Is that really her? That's not her. That's not her. That could be her. She looks like she got buccal fat added instead of removed. Yeah. Additional buccal fat.

She looks fuzzy. Well, people are saying maybe it's steroids that she's on or making her puffy. And then people said it's rude that she's wearing sunglasses in the shade and her mom is in the sun. Oh. That's fucked up. Real fucked up. Not classy. They're in a car.

It's not like they were just standing in that one spot that has a one sun. I know. No, no, no, no, no. It doesn't matter. People get mad. Oh, the sun's only there. Not classy. Abdominal surgery.

Abdominal surgery. That's broad. Yeah, so is she like a hockey player? She's got a third breast. Is that an upper body? Oh, she's got the third tit surgery. Yep. Fuck yeah.

Yeah, white women have been on this for a while. I just found out about it yesterday. Oh, yeah. That and Blueface are huge in my timeline. A couple weeks ago, I saw everyone talking about Kate Middleton. I did a quick search, and it was just Brazilian butt lift gifts. Why did they assume that? I don't know.

Because she was having surgery, maybe? Yeah. Just cosmetic. Why else would a woman get surgery? Right. Unless they want to make guys horny. Yeah, right. Great point.

Great point by Titus. Great point. I'm getting my hand widened. If she just comes back with a huge, huge ass, I feel like that's a dead giveaway. Yeah. Like, well, no. A huge ass is a dead giveaway. Like a giant, giant ass. Yeah. Damn, I almost got away asked. It's a dead giveaway. Like a giant, giant hat.

Yeah. Damn, I almost got away with it. You guys see Zod got kissed last night? Yes. He's the one person who just never wanted it. He never, ever wanted it, and he got kissed while wearing a pink rain outfit. Did you guys see that he got locked out of a porno site this morning? Wait, what?

Alright, wait. I gotta see the other part too. This is the kiss. Okay. Alright, Zah. Wearing pink. He didn't even say pause. He didn't say pause. No. This is Zimbabwe. That's how you get deported.

They're going to. Did y'all see Smokes' tweet? Smokes had a tweet just a second ago. Oh, there's a pause. It has Zai sitting in the background of Smokes or right behind him. And I don't know where they're going or know what they're about to do. I just can't really describe it or I give away the whole thing. Wait, wait. This is what's going on with this country man game's gone i was thinking of a state where you have to like to your user as you may know your elected official is in north

carolina requiring us to verify your age for allowing you to access our website well that's crazy and what time did he post this 1208 and what time can you check into a hotel room yeah wait wait that's not horny hours that's not horny hours. That's not horny hours. He's breaking horny hours. Now that's hotel horny hours. Also, real horny guys will just jerk off to that video that's attached to the top of the state representative. That's enough.

Wait, so what was the smokes? TJ, just pull up Nicky Smokes' latest tweet. Oh, it's Nicky Smokes. Yeah. They're going, about to get a facial I never asked for. Yeah. What? Oh.

Is he about to? Zah, in that moment, is looking at the porn site. Yeah. Trying to get in. Oh. How close? So they're just on the road. Yeah, they're on the road.

They're going to one of Nicky Smokes' six schools that he went to. Went to every school in Florida except Miami. Legendary. No, I'm not joking. He went to UCF too? Yeah, he went to UCF. The fights of the South. Went to UCF.

He went to FIU, FAU, Florida State, and Florida. Oh, my God. Yeah. Five schools in Florida. No degree? I think he ended up with a degree. Why was he transferred? From which one? I don't know.

He got STDs from all of them. Yeah. He went through it once and it was just like, this one sucked. Bad party scene. Then I went here. Party too hard. Had to go here. It's just varying. It's like the three little bears. Yeah, pretty much. He did three little bears for Florida

schools. Ron, does seeing those guys make you miss it? It is fun, but also I'm 35. Did you see Ravel tried to own me for storm chasers? Why? When the court chasing all happened, I retweeted all his old tweets being like, you know, storm the court kids and like being pro storm chasing.

And then I, so I i retreated him on the timeline so he caught on that i was doing that and he's like didn't you didn't you guys do a show called storm chasers like i was like yeah and it rocked yeah are you dumb yeah what was he what point was he yeah i don't i think he was like doing a gotcha but i've never changed my opinion that storming the court is awesome. And then he he said that he he when people were showing him the old tweets, he's like, yeah, that's 2021. I've changed. How do you what do you mean you've changed three, two years, three years?

You'll change genuinely such fun content, though. Like, I know those guys are having a blast. Yeah. And Titus, when you got you and Tate talked about it it on your podcast i remember being just so like genuinely pumped that you guys talked about it oh yeah this is like just that it was like making it even outside of the barstool world yeah a little bit was just uh so exciting but it's uh i'm just like happy for those dudes that they're just having such yeah i'm rooting Yeah, I'm rooting for them, but also, if I'm being completely honest, if they get zero court storms but every stop Zah kisses somebody,

I would laugh. That would be fun. Zah kisses a dude and gets locked out of a porn site. He's in for torture. That's torture. And Antonio Brown tweets him. Yeah, that was tough. Yeah, Zah's just going on a gay kiss.

Not the band. Not like not a gay Gene Simmons. I was wrong. Make that two and a half people. Two and a half. I mean, Zah weighs more than a lot of us. Yeah. Clemmer.

For sure. What is Zah weighing in it? He's like, I had to guess. Buck 60? 170? He's sturdy. Yeah. What? He. For sure. Where's I weighing in at? He's like, I had to guess $1.60. $1.70? He's sturdy. Yeah, what? He's dense. Luke, what do you weigh?

Like $1.70, $1.80? Yeah. Clemmer weighs $1.35. He's lighter than me. Yeah. I tried to pick up Zal once and almost blew my back out. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It was tough.

$1.35, $6.01. Jesus. What's the BMI on that? It's like a greyhound. Yeah, he is a greyhound. A little lip it. I don't think he ever pitched 35 consecutive shutout innings in wiffle ball. In 1995?

There was no record then. Was this sanctioned or is this just backyard with the kids? Has Clemmer proved he's 135? Because I think he's less. He might be less. 17.8. I don't know if that's. Oh.

Oh. Oh. So he's right on the cusp. Throw in 6 to 245. Just see. Uh-oh. Oh, no. That can't be right.

What about 6-3? What about 6-3? I'm more closer to 6-3 than 6-2. This will help. You're right on the count. What about 6-9? 242. 242.

Yeah, you're closer to 242. You're more like're probably 240. 240. That doesn't seem right. And KB, didn't they prove that BMI is a crock of malarkey? 239. Yeah, it doesn't account for BMI. There you go.

All right. Doesn't account for what? Big muscle. That was, yeah. My shit,'7 170 I bet that's obese What Say obese or

Say obese That's obese That's obese I don't got diabetes That's obese No You're overweight You're fine

My overweight boy Kyle Yeah but that's fat I'm not overweight It's too much muscle You're too muscular That's what I'm trying to overweight. It's too much muscle. You're too muscular. That's what I'm trying to say. You are legitimately too muscular. Same.

What's your splits like? What's your workouts like recently? Miscellaneous. Just whatever feels good? Today I just did 10 sets of three pause squats. Pause squats? You got to mix it up. I need to mix it up.

You get down and kiss someone? That's what you pause at the bottom when the dick gets in your ass? No. Pause squats. Yeah, I get it, but. Come on, man. Come on. Don't call straight.

That would be funny. Pause squats. You know he loves juicy pussy. You guys see Meek Mill? I'm not addicted to it. Yeah, what's going on with your boy? He's fine, brother.

Putting smut on his name. Yeah, they are. It's the white traditional media trying to deter from his beautiful album that just came out, which is magnificent.

I didn't know he was still dropping music. He just dropped the album two days ago, a little five-record joint. And then Schoolboy Q also came out with an album that's magnificent. Brandon, if you'd like to listen to that,

I think you'll enjoy it on your hour-and-a-half ride home. Schoolboy Q? Yes. I don't know who that is, but you think I would enjoy it? I think you'd enjoy it. I will listen to it today. Rowan, I got a question for you. At what point are you going to start rooting for the Bucs

to maybe win the title? Three weeks ago. Oh, you're not hurt by the Pat Bev trade? I am hurt by the Pat Bev trade. That's why I'm rooting for the Bucs. Oh, okay, that makes sense. That makes sense. You know how when your teams lose, get close to winning,

but lose, it's the best thing for your content? Yeah. Does that apply to pat bev no like with right we're cheering for like we're all we are obviously all bucks fans we're all bucks fans but i'm not do you think the audience of your show wants like the bucks to lose in game seven of the fight is that no if the guy is on the team i think it'd be way better content for pat bev to go on like a crazy like celebration tour. Yes.

Yeah. Yeah. I am not a Bucs fan. Well, we talked about this that I I always I have trouble separating franchises in the fan bases. Like I've always I've never been bothered by the Browns. Right. Like I want the Browns to do well. Be nice for the city of Cleveland.

Then I have to remind myself they're LeBron fans. Yeah. Bucs. Like I don't have any – I like Giannis a lot, but then I remind myself they're all Packers fans. But aren't a lot of Badgers fans too? Yeah, but they're Packers fans. Bucs fans are Packers fans first and foremost. But aren't Badgers fans Packers fans? There's a bunch of – yes.

Which that's got to be tough for you too. So why don't you just take those two parts of the Venn diagram, Bucs, Badgers, and just exclude the Packers fans there's a bunch of yes which is that's got to be tough for you too so why don't you just take those two parts of the Venn diagram Bucs Badgers and just yeah think of Bucs Badgers don't think of them as but the Badgers always lose and then the Packers win so it's like I just part I'm part of the losing culture so you're rooting against Pat I'm a loser no I I love Pat Bev so I'll just sit it out. Yeah. It would be great to have a long playoff run for content. And just hopefully we can – I mean, we're trying to sell something after every playoff game. God willing, they make the playoffs.

They should make the playoffs. I think they're almost already in the playoffs. Not to get all into basketball, but goddamn, the Celtics are good right now. Celtics are incredible. Yeah. But did you watch the Bucs game last night? Did not. No. But did you watch the Bucs game last night? Did not. No.

No Giannis. No Giannis, and they came back from 15 down to beat the Clippers, who had Kawhi, Paul George, and James Harden playing. I did. One of the smartest things I've done as a gambler. When I saw Giannis was out, I bet Dame Lillard scored more than 40 points at plus 420. Really?

Yeah. And he scored 41? Yeah, they looked awesome without him. It's Dame time. Yeah. Bobby Portis rules. And yet, Bobby Portis is a friend of all of us. Yeah.

Bowl for life. Pepe was the man, though. Yeah, he was awesome. The party seemed awesome. I heard you guys talking about it. Was it yesterday or the day before? Yeah. It seemed very fun.

Yeah. He didn't need 10 hookahs. No. Can't, like, nine people get on one hookah? A hookah can have a bunch of different tubes coming out of it. You really don't need more than three hookahs. I kind of want to fire up a hookah right now. Can we get a hookah on this show? I would love to hookah.

Yes. Paige. Paige. Can we light up some hookahs? Can we get a hookah? Are those hookahs still here? Can we have one? Weahs? Can we get a hookah? Are those hookahs still here? Can we have one? We'll take one.

Good call. You're missing something. We can fix it. Nick, you used to be a hookah engineer in your day. And I was. I would carry the hookah everywhere with me. I was like the caterpillar from Wizard of Oz. That film.

Cinderella. No. Alison. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck. I knew the caterpillar smoked hookah, but I didn't know the name of the fucking movie. Dude, that was like our high school move. If we had nothing to do, sneak into a hookah bar and just try to get high off hookah. Yeah.

We would just get dizzy as shit. Yeah, I would just go to the hookah bar, throw up, and get high off hookah and yeah we would just get dizzy as shit yeah i would just go to the hookah bar throw up and pretend like i didn't yeah i'm like this is sick that's a lot of partying for me getting sick and pretending like i'm not yeah oh i don't think i like it at least you figured out your tummy your tummy thing though yeah has that made a really positive change yeah Yeah, like instant. Awesome. Yeah. Quite nice.

Hey, we got to do our St. Patrick's Day show. Yeah. TJ, can we run the episode that we're running? Oh, fuck. Now I don't know when we're going to do it. No, because we got that thing. Yeah. Can you guys say what the thing is?

Or it's still under wraps? It's in development. When are we doing this big-ass freaking case race? We have to. We should tell Sass that... We just had a meeting about it. You did the case race? Yeah. I need you guys to give me a date.

We should tell Sass that the last Royal Rumble person is Shane Gillis, so he'll drink. Yeah. Because otherwise, there's a 0% chance that... Maybe the week of the draft? Yes. Because you'll be here for the whole week? And that's my birthday too. April 25th.

April 25th? Yes. A birthday party case race. I love that. Oh, thank you. That Thursday. We celebrate all the April birthdays, really. Oh, that's perfect.

Not just yours. So, yeah, if you came the whole week, we could do the Royal Rumble on, like, Monday or something. And that's the first week of the NBA playoffs. Bucks will have home games. Wait, the Royal Rumble will be April 22nd, Monday? Well, we could tape it. That's Earth Day. Oh.

Oh, that's... Is that Administrative Assistance Day, too? Passover. That's what I'm thinking of. It's a hookah delivery company with two locations in Chicago. Oh, I guess with only two hoses, you do need ten hookahs. Two hoses is bullshit. I know.

You gotta have at least more than... That smell takes me back. Smelling it is... Or you can have the different caps on the end. Yeah, and you pass it around. You just have your own personal cap that you put on. Very sticky. Yeah, because it's like the thing you put on. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

Brandon's. Yeah. One of the QBs on your top 10 QBs list has responded. Really? Oh. I'm going to guess it's Shadur Sanders. Oh. Because I did put him a little low.

You put smut on his. Ah. Send Brandon a drug test. Send Brandon a drug test. Yeah, I did put him a little low. You put smut on his head. Send Brandon a drug test. Send Brandon a drug test. Yeah, I did put him a little low. That was rage bait by you. I like that one guy replied. I can't remember who it was.

Oh, no. Someone replied, and they were like, I don't know which one of these top ten is there for clickbait or which one is showing Brandon has brain work. Yeah, it was Bud Elliott, who's a very measured college football guy. Yeah, trying to figure out which of these are placed for genius. It's just a list, dude. Brain damage.

And that list is like not. Well, why don't you go through and tell us which ones. I mean, I think Carson Beck is fantastic. Or brain damage. I hate Jackson Darth that i had to put him in high uh noah fifita is great dylan gabriel might be a little high because he's played a million years he also was supposed to be at mississippi state remember when that happened uh-huh cam ward is a guy that i'm banking on breaking through a little bit brady cook had a great year jaylen milrow could be high i don't but none of these are crazy cam rising just didn't play last year and sudur sandra was probably a little low i noticed there wasn't any tyler van

dyke well no because he he's not all that good yeah when i looked at this list i just thought there don't seem to be that many good quarterbacks yeah no it's a weak quarterback list and to be honest i say that every year though last year no last at the NFL Draft show, you were like, you've got to get your quarterback this year because next year, there's no quarterbacks. Caleb Williams and Drake Maycommon, we knew that this year was going to be a good year in the draft. We didn't know that Michael Penix and Jaden Daniels would come along.

Or Bo Nix. McCarthy. Bo Nix was awesome. McCarthy's fake. I mean, he's going to be like a top 15 pick. He's not going to the top 15. He's this year's Will Levis. He's this year's Will Levis. He's this year's Will Levis.

He's going to drop. He might go ahead of Daniels. Yeah, I don't know if Daniels is a pro QB anyway. But, I mean, these are six good quarterbacks we're talking about. I've got to find Shadur here. By the way, game time. I'm thinking about going to college football next year. Game time has you covered. You shouldn't have to worry when you're buying tickets to your next big event.

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Lowest price. Guaranteed with GameTime. Checking out Top Spin today. Going to be a hell of a fun game. Where is he? Look at that face. Oh, he's playing at tennis. There's a new Top Spin.

Top Spin. There's a new top spin tennis. That's what he's out there for. Those are great. Is he in just the entrance? Yeah, where is he? He's playing in a foyer. I think he's in the back entrance to a hotel,

the one you always have to make sure you have to have your key going in. You park back there. I see a hand sanitizer. Look at that eye. Yep. Damaged. Bill got it. People tight. Look at that eye. Yep. Damaged. Bill got it. People are probably asking him what happened to it,

and I would love to hear his. It's a tiny little speck. Is that good footage of the game right there? Or they couldn't have shown a screenshot? Oh, so that's what the new game is. Great. Rowan, how's your dog? Oh, yeah.

Good. Nice. That was a long pause. That was a pregnant pause. I don't know. Oh, no. I'm just finding the same eye goop that I found in this last dog. No, dogs get eye goop.

Yeah, it's just got me having PTSD. Of course. Yeah. Do you have got me having PTSD. Of course. Yeah. Do you have eye drops? Yeah, but the goop is still happening. Shit. I don't know. It's literally got me feeling like a tight, nasty feeling.

Yeah. I hope it's okay, though. I'm sure it's going to be okay. How's Dumbo doing? I miss Dumbo. Dumbo misses you? It's the only thing I miss about New York is that walk. Because it is like a movie scene.

It's fucking incredible. When it snows or it was like 65 degrees over the weekend. Yeah, when you post pictures of Dumbo, I get a little... Or the Stella Blue pictures of you guys in front of... Yeah, Dumbo's sick. Dumbo's beautiful. And just we take the dog out there to shit in front of, like it's in between the two bridges where we take Josie out to shit.

And it's like the most beautiful place. And she just has no idea that she's just shitting in front of like the Eiffel Tower. Yeah, right. Like London Bridge or some shit like that. Oh, you got to get her on that account. Yeah. Dog shitting. Oh, scenic shits.

There's got to be a scenic dog shits account. Oh, were you here for scenic pisses? Oh on that account. Yeah. Oh, Scenic Shits. There's got to be a Scenic Dog Shits account. Oh, were you here for Scenic Pisses? Oh, you love Scenic Pisses. Scenic Pisses. Where's your coolest shit, Rowan? You've traveled a lot. Where's your best shit? Oh, good question.

James Goldstein's house, the house where they filmed The Big Lebowski. Very cool shit. Oh, is he the Clippers fan? Yes. He has a bathroom, or his whole house has no right angles, but he has a bathroom that,

oh my God god that's awesome what's with the guys who do the do you see the guys who piss from different angles in bathrooms I love those guys it's kind of fucked up I think no what do you mean can you find it TJ it makes me laugh every time I want to do it but I can't

are they like pissing from across the room or something it'll be like rebound by Bosch kicks it out to Allen, bang, and it's like him pissing across the bathroom. But then there was one that was, like, blocked by James and he was just pissing on the wall. They're so funny. I want to do it, but I feel like it's already been done.

Yeah. But it makes me laugh every time. Can you find it for us, TJ? I think people are playing piss games in this office. There's so much. There's piss everywhere. There's pissy floors right by every single urinal. Yeah. There's incontinent men and barstool in general.

I found them to be rather clean. Every time I drip on the floor, I'm like, somebody should clean this up. Wait, so you're the guy? It's you, dude. Yeah, what? Wait, was that that easy? You just blamed everyone else. You just said you piss on the floor. And if you dribble on the floor, your first thought is somebody's got to clean it up.

Every time I stand on the floor, I'm like, somebody should clean that up. That's what I said. You said every time you piss on the floor. You admitted it. You're the pisser. I mean, I don't know. Your opinion, man.

Agree to disagree. Jay Billis told me that doesn't make sense. Being what? You were being disingenuous? I don't like agree to disagree. I was like, what? Well, he's also a big dumb bitch. Yeah.

Is he a bitch? He kind of has been the last couple of weeks. I mean, for someone who doesn't care about Court Storm, he's been going on every show talking about how much he has to work. Well, how else are you going to have everyone know that you don't care? Yeah, true. I think it's cool as hell when he tweets, like, young, cheesy morning yeah you gotta go to work to zero he follows zero people oh yeah him and skip that ruins twitter like you're just so he just sees his own tweets yeah he doesn't yeah

it doesn't interact yeah but i i started to realize that the young cheesy thing might have been the only thing he had going for him that's's the only reason I know him. It was that, and he was big on just yelling, pay the players in college sports. And now players are getting paid, and he just kind of has nothing to do. He's kind of lost it. So he's latched on to court storming, I think. He just needs a cause. He needs a cause.

Everyone needs a cause. He's a lawyer, and he's got to fight for something. I'm sure he'll get into gender issues soon. Yeah. It's kind of like the pipeline. Yeah. Yeah, it goes from court storming to gender issues. That's where the storm chasers go next.

The old revolving door. Yeah, that's the real court storming. Yeah. Look at this. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, blocked by James. That's funny.

What's the reply? Over the defender. Yeah. Oh, blocked by James. That's funny. What's the reply? Over the defender, yeah. Oh, shit. These are funny. It's awesome. I don't know. I laugh every time I see these. What don't you like, Brandon?

It's wildly disrespectful. I agree, but it's still funny picture. Every time I drip on the floor, I'm like, that's wildly disrespectful. Yeah, by whoever dripped on the floor. Whoever did it, yeah. We really should clean that up. Somebody's going to start doing it with turds. We did that in the old office, right?

What? No, the old office was boogers on the wall. It was boogers, boogers, boogers. Boogers all over the wall. Yeah, and then they fired mantis and it stopped. No, it didn't. Really? Oh, it's still going on in New York.

Still boogers. I'll see some of the longest pubes in the urinal in the New York office. That always confuses me. You go to the men's restroom, and you always, in a public one, you see the longest pube that could not have been grown in a lifetime. It's off a dead body. Someone's grave robbing the skull of the dead. The longest pubes, yeah.

You guys ever have a phantom hair growing off your body? My nipple is always one. What? One super long one. Oh, yeah. Damn. I'll get one right here, and I try to pluck it and it just curls in. It's scared.

Ingrown hair, yeah. Yeah, some people just get one off the rib, and it'll be just disgustingly long. I've never had a stray hair. What? Really? You get back hair? Off the rib. No, I don't have chest hair.

Off the rib? I've been throwing a shitload of nose hair recently. Yeah, that gets rough. I think that's a sign that it's over. You don't really have body hair? No. I don't either. I don't have back hair.

I don't have- I've got loads. What do your legs look like? Let's hop from chest to- Roll them up to the knee. Just blonde. They're hair. I don't have. I got loads. What do your legs look like? Let's roll them up to the knee. Just blonde. They're hairy, but they're blonde. Let's see. It's going to be hard to see with that muscle.

No, we can see it. We can see past that muscle. All right. Who's on your sock? Oh, thanks for asking. That is former WWF champion Yokozuna. Still alive? Very much no. Very much no. Too big.

Quite dead. He was not too big to fail? Shockingly dead. Well, he didn't fail. The heart. He was the WWF champion. He died. His dying failure? We all died. Yeah, absolutely. The ultimate failure. We all lived to die. What if you're a kamikaze? Good point. What if you're a kamikaze? Good point.

What if you're a Yokozuna? Double kidney number. No, he was a sumo wrestler. Kamikazes are like rolling on Molly. That's what they take, right? Yeah. They get fucked up.

Kamikazes? They take Molly? Yeah, I think thieves do too when they're breaking the houses. That's in Iraq. Kamikazes take Mali? Can you, dumb question, can you be a kamikaze that's not suicidal? Like you just... Yeah, could you also be like, is there any kamikazes

that like were flying to Pearl Harbor and they're like nah. Yeah. I'm just gonna land in Oregon and... You jump out of the plane and you let the plane go, but like you're like, look, I did it. I'm not going to land in Oregon. Or you jump out of the plane and you let the plane go. But like. You're like, look, I did it. You're like, I'm not trying to die for this shit. Yeah.

But. I guess you got to die. Yeah. I wonder if there's stories of some of them that were like, never mind. Just bailing. Yeah. I would bail. I would bail.

Yeah. Yeah. But even if you bail, your death is imminent. If you don't bail. You're bailing right above the field that you bail, your death is imminent. If you don't bail, your death is imminent. The feel that you're bombing and they're going to shoot you very quickly. I'd bail before I even got in the plane. I'd be like, oh, I got to take a shit. I would run away.

Yeah. Yes. He's like, I'll catch up to you guys. Don't worry. You boys have no honor. Zero. No, no honor. No.

Oh, my God. Billy doing the. Oh, no honor. No. Oh, my God. Billy doing the... Oh, the accent. Pull that shit up. Oh, was that brutal. Did you see this, Bruce? You are doing very good. I can't believe it.

Let's jump, guys. You are making progress. Y'all are lying. He didn't do this. He code switched to a vague African accent. Yeah, he also wanted to name the defense. The goal line, dude. Coney.

Oh, my God. What's something that's dangerous that will intimidate them? Coney? He's waiting for laughs. And then he asked to run a play and just got picked off immediately. Yeah. I saw that. Yeah, that code switch was tough.

You are doing very good, bro. We need this club. I just want to send Billy. Way to drive your feet, my friend. You see that? I didn't even see this one. Way to drive your feet, my friend. You see that?

Where's the other one? You beat him. The one where he did the Cody joke. Was he doing that in an accent? Good coach, bad coach. No, this one. He's the bad coach. I'm the good coach.

He's not going to be like, yeah, if you guys want to go home, it's fine. He's going to be like, no, no, no. We're staying until the sun goes down. We're practicing until the sun goes down. Sorry. Sorry. It's fine. Because this is our last practice.

All right? So we're practicing until the sun goes down. I'm sorry, guys. But we need to beat Kenya. We're not going to beat Kenya by quitting at 2 o'clock. We've got to practice until we've done everything we can. And there was still plenty to work on. Oh, my.

Goal line D. This is a defense where you let your nuts hang. What's a good name? What is, like, something scary and strong? I'm going to call it Coney. Is Coney? No, no, no. Don'm going to call it Conan. That is deeply offensive.

Donnie was so perfect. The first one is absurd. Way to drag your feet, my friend. Did you see this? Because he's not even trying to do their accent either. No.

He's just general African. I feel like just baseline like if what you think. Chad Hanks is like what? What's wrong with that? Way to drive your feet my friend. So brutal. This is deeply offensive.

By the way, did you see Stephen wrote in other, are Disney adults weirdos? Yeah, he's in Disney. He probably doesn't know about the meme. Like, they're the weirdest of weirdos. Yeah. Why do you have to even ask that? Mm-hmm. Right?

Yeah. Disney has that, like, super expensive neighborhood on the grounds now where you could buy a multi-million Disney-themed mansion. Oh, it's supposed to be like Pleasantville, right? Yeah, it's like real dystopian. It's where Andy Bernard wanted to live with Angela. Really? Right? And all the houses are themed, so every little detail inside the house has little tinkerbells and little whatever carved into the wood.

What's the psychology? Just that they didn'ts and little like whatever carved into the wood. Yeah. What's the psychology? Just that they didn't get to live there? They were traumatized. Traumatized. They didn't get love as a child. Yeah. Do you think they're happier than us?

Yes. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Not adjusted. No. No.

Yeah. No. They're fucked up for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Poorly adjusted adults, but happier. Probably. Pretty happy.

Yeah. Because they just like. To be able to feel that much excitement for something so simple yeah think about it like you walk out of your house you see Tinkerbell and you're like

that rocked yeah that was awesome day dude I saw Mickey today yeah new menu item did y'all see the women the track athletes that sound like Mickey Mouse

oh yes oh what oh my god you gotta alright so TJ pull it up but everyone's gotta close their eyes

And listen Where is she from Sweden I'm not laughing at this Tell us when you're ready to pull it up Everyone close your eyes Viewers at home close your eyes And listen When you're putting your mind to it

You know exactly what to do Indoors How was that for you It was amazing in your mind to me you know exactly what to do that's billy indoors how was that for you oh it was amazing i mean it was such a strong race you were running so fast running in the 50s so i knew i had to go out fast i'd leak in front of me so i wanted to be in front and i could hear how this is good now we keep going and this crowd is so amazing you're i want the girl next to her to speak, well, gosh.

Oh, cool. Is that a... I don't know. A glandular thing or something like that? It's kind of out of breath, too. I want to hear Billy try to do that one. I just want to send Billy places for the accent. Yeah. I want to hear Billy try to do that one I just want to send Billy places for the accent Yeah Do you remember the viral clip of the guy On a talk show and the host started laughing

Because he was so high pitched Yes Was it British? Fuck what was that They were laughing in his face Yeah Oh was it like a morning show I think he was on there for

For that reason For his high pitched voice Yeah we need to see this Oh so funny Oh yeah here we go If you just search high pitched voice game show Yeah presenteerde Erik Hartman de succesvolle talkshow Boemerang. Een programma dat voor de nodige opschudding zorgde. Marijke was 18 toen een dokter tijdens een routineoperatie haar ruggenmerg onhebbelijk beschadigde.

Valer werd het slachtoffer van een verstrooide assistent. Dat is heftig. Is dit echt? Het lijkt wel een makkelijke manier. Ja, het lijkt wel. Het is gewoon een programma die de kofferwetensdagen weggebracht heeft. It's a real? It looks like a Machi-Metal. Yeah it does. Just looking back at this. I don't remember this part. I've never seen this show. You were completely wrong. It's about a ten second call. I think it's the other guys start talking.

This is heavy. Wait, wait. Get her crying and then go back to her. Oh no. Oh no. I'm really excited. I'm afraid. Yes. What was that exactly? Well, uh... Cool. There was a lot of pain from...

What's this? ...chainsaw stabbing. Mhm. I think so. And that had to do with my... Oh, the guy behind him. ...amandla. And doctor said that...

He's trying to hold him back!...an operation had to happen. And with this as a result... Oh, de vrouw daaronder. Met u, Amanda. En dokter, u had een operatie te laten gebeuren. En met dit als gevolg. Valère was mismeesterd aan zijn stembanden. En toen hij mij aansprak, ja, er kwam zo'n gek geluid uit. Ik moest zo ontzettend lachen. Maar ik wist natuurlijk van, ik mag niet lachen. Ik mag niet lachen. Dus ik probeerde mijn lach in te houden. Maar hoe meer ik mij probeerde te concentreren op mij, op de ernst, ja,, hoe meer ik voelde van dit hou ik hier niet uit, dit hou ik niet uit. Het was afschuwelijk.

Marijke, jij had een normaal leven daarvoor en toen ploeg je uit narcose en dan merk je dat het niet meer hetzelfde zal zijn. Hoe reageer je daar dan op? Het heeft iets te maken, toch? Het heeft iets te maken. Dit is een verhaal. Dit is een verhaal. Dat was bij mij dus ook mijn eerste gewaarwording en ik dacht dat kan niet. Dat mag niet. Excuseer. Excuseer, excuseer André. Dus ehm... Je probeert dan terug je toekomst... Ik begrijp echt niet wat er hier nu aan het gebeuren is. Sorry, echt sorry.

Ik wil echt sorry, echt sorry. Sorry dames en heren. Dat betekent ook dat bijvoorbeeld... ...seksualiteit ook een groot probleem bijvoorbeeld wordt. Ja, mijn vriend heeft het gewoon gedaan, maar eigenlijk neem ik hem daar ook niet kwaad. Plus het feit dat als je met seks omgaat, is het niet alleen het fysieke dat telt,

maar ook de lieve woordjes. Haha, no way! This is so bad. This has to be fake. Yeah. It has to be mockumentary. Yeah. Still very funny Talk show host laughing is great It breaks me

Every time Did you guys see Bob Costas laughing at Richard Lewis? No He was like laughing so hard Oh yeah yeah They couldn't air it They were like They thought that it would damage Bob Costas' reputation

Because he was squirming So his little feet were up in the air Yeah he was like stomping his feet It looked like he was trying to give birth It reputation because he was squirming. Oh, his little feet were up in the air. Yeah, he was like stomping his feet. It looked like he was trying to give birth. It did. Yeah, his feet were like way up, way up. Have you guys seen any of the clips Sam Morrill, who's a very funny comedian,

he gets invited on morning shows and he just ruins it every time. He did one recently. If you want to go to his Instagram, the most recent one. He just it's so it's genius because it makes these morning show hosts so uncomfortable and they keep inviting him on. Is it the trafficking one? No, it's the one P. Diddy.

He wanted to bring up P. Diddy and they were just no, not not the pinned one. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going. I don't know how he does it because I can't handle like awkward. Secondhand embarrassment? Yeah. Yeah.

It kills me. I can't handle it either. I only watched the board at once. He took it down? No. Keep going. Oh, wait. I see how he changes the.

It was recent. It was very recent. That one, yeah. Salt Lake City. You love morning shows? I do. Anything topical I'm excited to talk about. Like the P. Diddy stuff I want to talk about. You know, the sexual harassment.

We should probably not go too far down that particular topic. P. Diddy didn't have sex with me, I want to make that clear. Okay. I don't think we were going to ask. Just so you know. But now it's out there. But that's not gay, he probably wanted the power, you know? This is kind of your shtick now, you go on morning shows and you like to ruin the morning

show? Yes. I don't know why people keep inviting me back. Our producer just gave us a time, 30 seconds. Oh, no. No, no, no, come on. I can finish in 30 seconds. Just ask my girlfriend.

He's not coming back to our show. Sam, you can come back. I hope so. Just not on the air. You hope so? Just not on the air. I love coming, so I hope I get to come back. All right, we're're gonna go to John

Their reactions They're just so good It's crazy that every morning show Archetype host guy is the same Same No matter what Doesn't matter what Like city

And they're like shocked That someone's making a joke We weren't gonna ask that You can go down a wormhole of those Like Bobby Lee has dozens that are ridiculous. Who gets invited on? Oh, yeah. Oh, it's great.

It's so funny. Yeah, they all are the same. And that's really the only type of celebrity they'll ever get on a national stage is to be embarrassed. That's it. It's crazy that that's still an archetype. That type of morning show is still what people want to see. Right. Is it dying out at all?

I don't know. I don't think so. Yeah, I don't know. If you're in a small town, is your cable company, is the local ABC affiliate? Yeah, you still want the local flavor maybe. It's just guys who went to journalism school. There will always be a market for the local.

Yeah. They just make them in a lab. Yeah. Put them out there. It's like the 50s. It like makes people like feel. Yeah. Yeah.

Old and like weird. And there and you know, those guys are like walking around town being like, I'm the A-list celebrity. Oh, they are. Yeah. Yeah. What was that weatherman in Philly who was like hurricane hurricane schwartz and he was like dating all these but he was like king dingling of philadelphia this mike jerek is the

is like the original type like or like he was like almost what ron burgundy's based on he's like inappropriate he's like this fox morning host who would always uh just say he would always just make weird sexual comments. Yeah. It was awesome, though. It was very respectable. But he was, like, they were like, I remember he was at the zoo once when I was there, and everyone was like, oh, my God. Oh, wait, Hurricane.

Hurricane Schwartz. But John Belaris was also a weatherman, and he had, like, scandals, though. Oh, yeah. What was his, do you remember what his scandals were? I feel like they were all just very flashy and very, like. That's fun. A weatherman scandal?

Like, you'd think he was doing, likeig carton style stuff oh which is good stuff good good fun i love weatherman you do there was a world i wanted to be a weatherman for about two years like 16 17 i wanted to be a weatherman weatherman or meteorologist the tv one how pissed do you think the weather men and women are that like we just don't need them anymore i still it's like 20 years ago or 30 years ago you needed them to tell you what the weather was going to be now it's who watches that for the way i haven't watched local tv since i got to chicago last week we had the tornado warnings i turned on local tv and it was just them doing the local weather and telling you where the warnings were and I watched it for an hour and a half. It was still, it's like

however many shot last night in Chicago and now for our doggy corner here's a Chihuahua in a coat. I think weathermen are actually evolving to get more silly. Because they know their job has been kind of taken away. We got one in Mississippi that goes viral every year.

One time he had a co-worker there and he clapped at him on the air. And he did that. He's had several moments where he's gone viral. I was drawing penises and stuff. There's got to be a guy purposely drawing the penis. Oh, yeah. He's gone viral so bad. By the way, John Belaris, he was in Miami.

He got drugged and they took $43,000 off his Amex card. Whoa. It's what happened to him. I wonder who drugged him. Probably just a random woman. Beautiful, yeah. It's probably Pocahontas. Somebody with a warm front.

That almost happened to Mook. Oh, and he also shit himself. Oh. That happened. Anyway. I just love that Latina weather girl. You guys know her? There's several.

I mean, the ones they have in South America are just- Just the hottest girls. Who is it, France, that has the topless weather girl? have in South America are just the hottest girls. Who is it, France, that has the topless weather girl? Yeah. And it's just on the news. It's like, here's our... That rocks. What?

Yeah. That's pretty sweet. Remember when Al Roker shit himself? At the White House? Oh. Yeah. What? Did he?

Yeah. Yes. Yeah, he shit himself. And he just told everyone about it? I think so. I think he did. I mean, if there's enough shit, you can't hide it. Do you think that the

local weather people are like, they have posters of Al Roker in their house? They grew up with probably. Yeah. Like, that's the pinnacle, right? Yeah, see the number one all the time. I don't know. They might see him as like a sellout because he left weather. The white one. Willard Scott

back in the day? Oh yeah, Willard Scott. They don't even, they're not the ones collecting the weather right they're just told what i think at that level they're not meteorologists do the they read the doppler don't they yeah but the local ones these days are good at they can they can read the info to you i mean yeah but it still is like you could just go online yeah but if this is developing storm they have the the training to know how it's developing and what's happening. And they can break it down to you like somebody

breaking down film. I mean, isn't it pretty self-evident? Like, where the cloud is over? No, if there's like convex and this and that and this is crashing and then there's a bow echo and I'm just saying all the things I know to say. But there's, they can break that i'm

team weatherman here you ever watch the weather channel as it just uh not the weather channel i like the local weather that's crazy remember the i love weather remember the days when your uh fm radio station used to dispatch like seven helicopters and it cost four million dollars a month to give you traffic updates yeah yeah just sitting in a helicopter traffic yeah yeah all that's gone so much fucking money yeah is that really how they did it yeah that's how they did it in indy yeah you have like seven different helicopters were flying around just looking at the traffic traffic chopper yeah yeah but looking back always be like wolfman or something back on it how the fuck did they afford all that i mean i guess radio stations were popping off back in the

day but that's a hell of a job just to go up and be like shit it's crowded yeah yeah it's gonna be awesome like it's not crowded for me yeah everyone else it sucks yeah or to have to check that to find out what the traffic was like like to have to listen to the radio to be like should i take 95 yeah yeah i remember going down to like uh philly's listen to the radio to be like, should I take 95 or 76? I remember going down to like a Phillies game. So my dad would be like, let me, let me check the traffic real quick on the radio.

95 or 76. But how many options are there even? Like, you know what I mean? Like, I, those things blow my mind. I remember like on family vacations,

my dad taking out the big Atlas. Yeah. And being like, all right, we've got to go this way. And that way it's like, what the fuck? MapQuest. Dude. MapQuest was awesome. I It's like, what the fuck? MapQuest, dude.

MapQuest was awesome. I can't believe that was a thing. MapQuest changed the game. I loved it. Just have your nine sheets right there. Yeah.

I don't know why. But if you miss something or like, if it's like, this is coming up in like 26 miles. Like, how do you know

if you got the 26 miles? Right. We would always fuck up with MapQuest. Every time. You hit that button on your car. Oh, really? Pressing that button. What's that for? It can track. It tracks your distance.

The trip meter. It used to be an actual button you'd press. I've never once used cruise control either. Oh, cruise control is a power button. Oh, yeah. C.J. was something like that too. I was like, how do people use cruise control? You've never used cruise control? Cruise control is the best. I don cruise control is about cruise control. Oh, yeah. Steve and Jay was talking about that, too. I was like, how do people use cruise control? You never use cruise control. Never once.

Cruise control is the best. I don't even know what that means. You still got to, like. Set your speed. You don't have to do anything. You can take your foot off the gas. I like to speed up, slow down. I'm weaving like a Navajo.

Yeah, but if you're going on a long trip, if you're going on a five-hour trip. That's what you're saying. Just put it on 78 and just. Yeah, if you're driving late night, cruise control is the greatest thing in the world because you don't have to think about it yeah you fall asleep yeah your foot's not keeping you from falling the ridges on the side of the road wake you up dude yeah you're right you are what do you do also new cars like my car if i put on cruise control and like someone like cuts in front of me it slows down on so does yours do that brandon oh well i have his car yeah it's true or they'll

correct you into your lane, too. Yeah. Cruise control rocks. What have you guys been doing? You fucking have your foot on the pedal all the time? Yeah. You take it off? That probably feels weird.

That's the whole point of cruise control. Cruising. Give your leg a rest. That feels dangerous. You give your leg a rest. It's not like exhausting your leg. Yeah. Oh, yeah, it is.

I don't think you guys have driven that far. Oh, thank God. I was so tired. I don't think you guys are tripping. Oh, thank God. I was so tired. I don't think you guys are tripping. Ow! You ever been tripping? Oh, fuck! We need to invent something to fix this.

Hold on. You guys are modeling? You guys are modeling? Yeah. Oh, no! I can't take anymore. I just ran and backed me up. Let me ask you a question.

There's no chance. Have you ever been driving down the interstate, and you look down, and you're like, fuck, I'm going 86. Exactly. No, but cruise control, back me up. I know, Titus, you know this, too. When you go over, like, five hours, your hip starts to lock up a little. Yeah, of course. And then you get that rest of being able to put it on the ground instead of being like this.

That's a real thing. I don't think you guys ever did a road trip. Oh, big road trips. No road trips. No road trips. Nick doesn't lie. They drive up to Pittsburgh and call it a road trip. Yeah.

Look at him. They don't know. I never have. The rest of your leg is huge. They don't know. You've never driven somewhere where your leg cramps up? My foot, if I'm wearing too tight of shoes. Yeah, and your hip.

Because you're like this the whole time. Or my ass. I'm plopping down. But that'll happen in the back seat. Never my half or my ass plopping down but that'll happen never max half for my leg you pick your number just that you're comfortable with going like 79 is nine miles over 70 so you're not going to get caught speeding if you you put it there and you go right easy i get it if you're driving through western nebraska and there's nobody within 50

miles of you yeah you gotta go cruise control you can't be you you. Yeah. You've got to go cruise control. You can't be hitting it. You have to go cruise. You have to. You just have to go cruise. I've never done great planes trips, so that could change it. You ever done a bad one? Pat and I first started dating.

I would go down to Texas to visit him, and he rented a Mustang. We went in the back roads, and he's like, just let her rip. And I can't believe we didn't die. You were going crazy? We were going crazy. Have you ever done that? See if you can max out your car anywhere? Especially with a rental.

It's a rental. Don't be gentle. Y'all ever race? I hated speed demons. Y'all ever do? Stunt devils. After school races or anything like that? No, I was afraid.

We did it in high school, me and Che Anderson. Che? Che Anderson. His first name was Che? Che Anderson, yeah. That's a black man. It was a black man, very short. Still is?

It still is. Very strong? Me and I don't know who was in my car, and then we met Freddie Billups and Che Anderson on Industrial Access Road, and we just hammered it down. Sounds like a good road to race on. Were you serious? Or was it like, let's just...

No, it was like, hey, I can beat your car. No, I can beat your car. Were you racing for pink slips? No, but he did have a Chevy Nova. I just got a text. I feel like Stu's trying to get ahead of something. He just sent me a text of a story that someone found multiple arrests after body parts found on Long Island 100 yards from his house.

And then he said, ready to move to Chicago. Is that the ongoing case? Oh, that one was crazy. The Gilgo Beach? Yeah. Yeah. He's not near the beach, though. I'm sure you guys will get the text, too, soon.

He sends every text to everyone when he sends an update. 100 yards from his house. 100 yards from his house. Then it says, ready to move to Chicago. Huh. That's interesting. There's an alibi. Uh-oh.

I don't think texting it out is a good alibi though yeah that's true why are people saying that we're a pre-recorded show the stream lagged for a second when they lag they think it means that we dumped something because somebody said a slur if I ever dumped anything the show would not come back

it would be black and the stream would end I got DM's today saying, what did you say this morning? Yeah. If a stream ever lags, that means it lagged. But you did catch that slur. If somebody says a dump button, then the stream would not come back. It lagged during Brandon's slur? Right.

Got it. Beautiful, fortuitous lag. Bro, could you fit the tip of your penis in the top of that body armor This one Right here Soft Oh

Yeah Oh Yeah Che can't Che's uh He's packing He's girthed like that He's girthed like that

He wasn't able to piss In this bottle Wait he tried it We were driving from Indianapolis to Chicago And he was not able to I bet that there was just a user error there. He probably couldn't wrangle it.

I think he was trying to put his balls in as well. Yeah. Oh, I wonder if Greg Cassell ever texted him back. Probably not. Probably not. I need to see Che's penis now. I know. Wait.

I've seen it. It's big. All right. wait did it i've seen it and it's big all right and it makes perfect sense when we had this revelation last week like jay he's got this confidence that shouldn't be there because everything you see about him is like this guy has nothing going for him oh yeah but then you realize he's got a big dick did he he make himself look more Asian? Yeah. For this picture alone. Because I thought when he took his... What's the thing that he takes off and he looks less Asian? We found out when he's wet, he looks less Asian.

Oh, yeah, that was it. Yeah. If he gets wet, he's a white man. And then, yeah, he just Asianed it up. That was racist. That was racist That was racist Yeah What the fuck was that? Why was he squinting?

There's no sun What the fuck? Dump this dump this Dump dump dump Dump dump What the fuck? Yeah Even the thumbs up is a little bit on there

Yeah If he did a peace sign Yeah yeah And it would have been We just need to send Billy football to beers around the world Yeah Cause it has beers Yes And. We just need to send Billy football to beers around the world. Yeah. Because it has beers. Yes.

And he's just going to all the stops. Well, they sell. All the bartenders are like, I'm from Orlando, dude. Yeah. No, he would be like Mystique there. Is that the X-Men that changes everything? Yeah. It'd be like watching Split.

I miss when he's not around, which hurts for me to even say. I was looking forward to seeing him on the drive down. Yeah, he is just one of those guys. I like him best. Are you getting ready for draft season with him? Of course. I'm grinding tape. I love that. I'm grinding tape.

Full game tape. Highlights, then full game tapes. Anything I can find. I don't know if you heard on Thursday, but I told the story. I met, Che has like a rival Bucs fan that I saw them meet, and he's got beef in the Bucs community. What's the beef over? I think the guy just...

Is a bigger fan? I don't know. Well, his name's Joe Bucs fan. Legal. Are you sure he's not Joe Bucs fan? He looked like Frank, and they shook hands, and they kind of just... But is he a fan of Joe Bucs?

No. Oh. Confusing. I agree. Joe is he a fan of Joe Buck? No. Oh. Confusing. I agree. Joe Buck's fan. Buck's fan. And he's not the Milwaukee Bucks either? Nope.

That's something me and Che have in common, honestly. Yeah, you're Bucks fans. We're both Bucks guys. Deep down. Joe Buck's fan. Oh, shit. 16 years delivering Buccaneers news and analysis 24-7. Literally.

Potential NFL B7 literally John Cena that tells you all I need to know oh wait that's a cuck move Hall of Fame voter I Kaufman works here what is he saying like he's not a Hall of Fame voter he just works with someone who has a Hall of Fame I should

we should all change ours to Naismith voter works yeah yeah I just has a Naismith voter you do Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Titus has a Naismith voter. Yeah, that's true. You do? A wooden award. A wooden award. Different, yeah. What's wooden player of the year?

Yeah. College player of the year? They don't really have a Heisman, so they have multiple. What's Naismith? It's the same thing. Oh. Yeah. That's lame.

Is yours for sale? Is your vote for sale? Yeah, it always is. I thought he had it. Yeah, absolutely. I forgot I had it. I said on a podcast one time, I was like, I used to have a wooden vote, yada, yada, yada.

And then the guy who gave me the vote was like, he emailed me right away. He's like, you still have it. You still have it. Is it really? Hell yeah. Let's get Shador in there. Yeah, write in Brandon Walker.

Yeah, that would be funny. For what? National basketball player of the Year. I got to go do ZBT. Chaps is on a trip. We can only do it right now. But, Roan, I feel like a beam of sunshine walked into the building. Yeah.

That's so nice of you, Kate. I hope your back feels better. Just do the painkillers. It really is not going to be that much worse. What's the worst? You got a blue face. Oh, no. I know that struggle.

That is... Oh, my God. Oh, she can't straighten up. Jesus. Physical therapy. Kate, stretching, physical therapy, strength training. That shit will get you through. I think her bones are just dust.

Honestly, you know who she needs to hit up? Dee Cliff. She needs to hit up the hut. Cliff? D Martino. No, no. D Cliff. The hut? The hut. The guy, the actual hut. You want her to hit up our biggest enemy. What's his name?

D Cliff. Why are you saying D Cliff? I forget his first name and his last name. Clifford. Derek Clifford? He's the Boston College player who said he is like getting chicken tenders with his boys. What does he do? He does like besides ruining the

functional mobility training. Like he does exactly what she needs is like to create a life of we don't need that guy in the office. Dennis Clifford D Cliff. We don't need him in the office. Not in the office. She just needs to hit him up. He'll just start fucking Swatting us left and right

Mantis could probably help her That boy's That boy's walking Say what not to do Yeah You have him on Pat Bev Pod? We did I gotta listen

Was it awesome? Oh yeah Or So it was Okay What? It was awesome He had BDS like Stephen Che

His big dick syndrome. I need to see Che's cock. I know, man. He'll show it. If we're just like, hey, we need to see it. He would definitely just be like, okay. I need to see it soft. I need to see it hard.

We should do that reveal like we did with the nut. We went in the booth that time and showed a phone picture of the nut. And we all individual reveals nuts are way different than cock cock is you're in a cock debt but you know he would do it yeah i'm just saying we go in there and see your buddy's dick you have to show your dick that's the craziest part about chave we're like the price of entry chave we're gonna do we're gonna all look at your dick i'm afraid i'd suck it yeah we crave another clock 20 minutes later but we're all gonna do him at your dick. I'm afraid I'd suck it. Yeah. Crave another cock 20 minutes later.

But if we're all going to do him the favor of saying he's got a big dick, he at least needs to show it to us. Is there a chance it's still tiny and he just has a delusion? Yes. Yeah. Yes. I want this thing to be like the cap of a tire. Yeah, there was like a thimble next to it that he thought, he's like, I couldn't fit into the thimble.

Yeah, this was actually too big. Yeah, to it that he thought. He's like, I couldn't fit into the thimble. Yeah, this was actually too big. Yeah, that's what he meant. That was the problem. Yeah, did you actually see him try to fit it into the bottle? No, he turned his back to us. Yeah, so maybe he just. Yeah. Oh, if you have a cock that big, you just don't turn your back to do that.

Yeah, he should have just draped it over my shoulder. You avert your eyes from the cock. A continental soldier. I like the idea of Che having an actual egg roll down there. Like a literal? Like a literal egg roll. A real egg roll. Yeah.

I guess if he's not circumcised, it kind of would look like that. He's got to be, right? In my mind, he is. But we'll find out when he comes back. Yeah, I think we have to do it. We will. I think we have to do it. Let's try to sell it.

We're just going to man up and do it. Cock reveal day. Yeah. Or if he makes a mold of it, then you're not actually looking at his cock. Oh, yeah. You're just looking at a prosthetic. Oh, maybe a proxy.

Oh, we could put the cock by proxy. Yeah, just lay it flat on the cement. Let's get Yak Dildo's made. Yeah. Of Stephen Che. I think we gotta just look at it. I kinda wanna look at it inildos, man. Yeah. Of Stephen Che. I think we got to just look at it. I think we got to look at it. I kind of want to look at it in the flesh, too.

I don't want a picture. Yeah, but what if I fucking accidentally suck it to completion? Yeah, that's a risk. Call him, CJ. Call him. Let's just ask him if he would be open to this. We're going to call him in Disney World. Yeah.

Just ask him. It's only $35. Fuck, I might have to suck this day. What was that? Kona Willy? To make your own dildo. Glow in the dark. Oh, I'm going to buy this.

No, please. I'll buy everything. Kona Willy. But he might not even fit in the mold. Yeah, look at that mold. I mean, is that mold one cock fits all? It's only 3.1 stars. Go to the reviews.

330 ratings? God damn. How could it be that bad? I got to read the one stars. My dick's pink now. Even the three stars. I don't know if I'd want to see my hard dick detached from me. I could not.

Should I call him? Give him a ring. Final product is not good. That looked like warts. That's what it was. It was their fault. Not that you have warts. A clumpy mess.

Clumpy mess is a disgusting pairing. This isn't my dick. That's a clumpy mess. Sorry, mess is a disgusting pairing of words. This isn't my dick. That's a clumpy mess. Sorry, buddy. That's your dick. You've got a clumpy mess down there. Clumps. Very disappointing.

Where are the good reviews? These guys love the word clump. I just have a clumpy dick. Imagine that. Yeah, clumpy sucks. Oh, shit. Did you hang up on him while he was answering? I did.

It makes you harden before we get to the end. So all these guys' cocks suck. Hey, Steven. Yes. I got a question for you. Don't make it weird. Also, did you agree to waive all HR violations that might happen in the question? I consent.

Okay. When you come back, can we all see your cock? Man. I knew this day would come. Everybody but Kate. Everyone but Kate. Everyone but Kate. Kate's already seen it pretty much.

Yeah. So everyone? Yeah, man. If you really want to But uh Okay Can we do this in like a Like a more natural

Like locker room setting Yes Yes No problem We'll make it as natural as possible We can role play Yeah that's good That's good

I like that a lot Okay Yeah let's Maybe let's not set a hard date on it But yeah A hard date Okay Alright perfect

Alright enjoy Disney World Alright bye He just wants us to no no he wants to see our decks too no no but he he basically was like as long as you guys like you know make it kind of a cool experience i'm down so yeah uh tj we just put a bench in the bathroom is anyone clamoring for this in the chat no i don't think so. JW. Yeah. He is down for anything. We need a Zob pause right now. Right.

So basically, we just have to role play where we just build like a fake. Because he doesn't want it to be weird. Yeah. So he'll just walk out. Why did he laugh like an evil emperor? I know. He's like. There are walkers in here.

One by one, we'll sit in the bathroom on a bench and have him just walk out and just be like, What's up, buddy? Good lift. And then we'll come back and give a review. It's about time. Take a glance while he reads a book or something like that. Yeah. Goddamn, Jay. You know, I mean, he's down for literally everything.

I think I've turned the corner. I think it's small again. I think you know him willing to do this. Yeah. If you guys asked me that, I'd be like, Hell no. I think it's small again. I think you know him willing to do this. Yeah. If you guys asked me that, I'd be like, hell no. Unless you have a microscope. But he's delusional.

That is a good point. Good point. Yeah. I think it's tidy. Imagine if we broke it to him that he actually had a small cock. Imagine. That would be the funniest result ever. We could do it like the Maury Show. You thought your cock was big.

Results are in. Jay, you have two inches. You have a small cock. Not have a big cock. What do you mean, buddy? Two inches is big. Oh, my God. What a plot twist that would be.

He was trying to put it in, like, sideways into the bottle. Yeah, and he's like Hallow Shall. Shallow Howl, where he just looks at his cock. He's like Hallow Shall Like Shallow How Where he like He just looks at his cock He's like This thing is ginormous It's a big cock

Yeah like it actually did fit But he just in his head He's like It won't fit That might be the case Yeah Shallow How Chase Cock

Chase had a vagina this whole time What is it gonna be? What do you think his wife was like Who is that? What did they ask? I hope he was on the teacups Ah the guy's the Yeah I want to see my cock

Ah he's probably smug about it Oh yeah It was just the boys It happened They're dying to see my cock What a fucking guy We should just do cock day We're gonna have

Everyone has to do the cock day No we're not doing the cock day We all have to Everyone's gotta One guy has to suck it Yeah One of us gets to suck it Or lands on mousetrap

Or just become closer friends Yeah Yeah let's do a wheel I mean girls do this all the time. Girls see their pussy and vagina and their tits. Oh, yeah. Girls getting ready naked to be able to show, like, hey, look at this pussy. Yeah, they're like, oh, my pussy.

Every time. Pussy very visible unless you really show it. No, I think they do. I think girls just walk around naked. They're like, check out my pussy. Yeah. But then they'd have to get on their ass. But, like, would you guys clown me?

Would you guys, like, make fun of me too much? Like, if I huge dick? Oh, yeah. You're not getting out of here alive. Oh, we would eat you alive. No, the biggest dick and the smallest dick are in trouble. Yeah. We're back to a three little bears situation.

Yep. We need to be just right. You'll know if I stop laughing at one of your jokes. I hate you. Kyle's not funny. What? Never was. I've seen Kyle's dick.

And? You showed it to a pizza man. Remember that? What? Yo, this got convoluted in the lore. What? Okay, so unconvoluted. You were pissing off the side of the deck

and the pizza man decided not to go to the front door and he walked up the side. I think I did a real quick maneuver. Oh, that's normal. Yeah, he didn't show it to the pizza man. The pizza man saw it. Yeah, I mean, Max and memes have... Because, like, they'll...

Whenever we golf for a video, they'll try have, because, like, they'll, whenever we golf for a video, they'll try to, like, get me peeing, and I'll just turn around and be like, now you can't use it. Oh, yeah. Yeah, so they've definitely. Hank also has seen my cock because we did that George Brett video, and I forgot to take off the GoPro in the bathroom, and I got fully naked, and he had the footage. Didn't he see PFTs too?

Billy accidentally tweeted PFTs. That's what it is. What? Bear? I think he was pissing. Who did this? This is a big dick. Did that to PFT. And that was bad.

It would be great for camaraderie. It would. If we all saw each other's dicks. Y'all just kind of knew. No. We should actually watch each other fuck. Every great team has seen each other's dicks. All look at each other's dicks, and then the next episode, change the seating order on the yak.

Yeah, based on, yeah. Figure it out. Choose your own adventure. I like that. Brandon's off the show. Why is Big Cat sitting in the parking lot? I remember seeing my dad's dick as a kid. You guys never saw your dad's dick?

I remember thinking it was the biggest thing of all time. I thought it was impossible to reach. I was like, holy fuck. To reach? Hold on. It was so high. An impossible goal to achieve. Brandon's hanging like money in the bank.

You're going to get up here, son. Ladder match to your dad's balls. Brandon was trying to suck his dad's dick no kids i mean my kids they walk in on me in the bathroom my son said it before he's like oh you have such a big penis oh i don't do you get yeah it feels good yeah he says penis really yeah what else you're supposed to call it you have little names for it. PP. Tallywhacker. Pecker. Oh, yeah, that's too advanced.

It's a penis. Did you say a penis? This is like a Ruth Conda, dude. Your son walks in, my father, what a big penis. No, he says your penis is big. My, my father. No, it's not. No, there's always little names for it. You rebuttal?

Yeah, I said no. No, it ain't? I said, nah. Daddy, it's the perfect size to not hit cervix, but pleasure. Why, thank you, son. Run along. You've been a good boy. Get out of here, scamp.

Why would you say penis? Because he's four. Yeah, what does he call you, Dada still or Daddy? Father. Dada? Dada. You can't, Nick. Dada is, Dada still or Daddy? Father. Dada. Dada. You can't mix. Dada is.

Dada and penis don't mix. Yeah, you can't mix. A little pee pee. Dada and penis don't mix. Daddy. That is never Daddy and penis. That's oil and water, brother. Yeah, he said Daddy, your penis is still.

Dad and penis. It's got to be like Dada. Dada has pee pee. Yeah, pee pee or like Twinkie or some shit. What? Twinkie. Whatever name the family comes up with. It's wee wee.

Is that something you come to decide or does it just come to you as a fun? I just use the regular word because they're going to learn it. Brandon, what's your word? What was your word for Tommy when he was? It was ting-tong. That's racist. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's way worse.

Look at your ting-tong. So if Tommy, when he was two years old, saw mine, he'd be like, you got a big ting-tong. Yes, they say that. They would have said penis. Yeah, but they say, but you agree with me. Ting-tong. It's not Ruth Conda that the kids do see it and they're like, oh. You're convoluting what the problem here is.

I understand the penis thing, but I use the real words with my kids. Oh. They're going to learn something. Did you guys come up with ting-tong? Ting-tong. Ting-tong. How did you arrive at that? Huh? Yeah, how guys come up with ting-tong? Ting-tong. Ting-tong. How did you arrive at that? Huh?

Yeah, how'd you land on ting-tong? I don't remember. I think it was, I don't know if it was the wife's family's thing or what, but it was just

the boys had ting-tong. Is it a generational thing? No, no, no. Your grandpappy had a ting-tong? His father? Ting-tong. You know. Oh, my God.

Ting-tong. Ting-tong. Do you my God. Ting-tong. Ting-tong. Do you guys do special names for your grandparents? Like Mimi and Papa. I have Grandpa and Grandma. I have Granny. Did you, sorry, I don't know your family situation. Did you have two, do you know both grandmas?

No. Okay. Yeah, because I always called my grandma grandma last name, grandma last name. That was it. Isn't it up to the grandparent? My brother and sister have a bunch of kids now. Yeah, you gotta decide.

And my mom and dad are like ma and pap all or something. And then they'll like do that to me. And I don't know. It's getting weird. My family's getting a little... As a guy who doesn't have kids, watching my mom and dad become... Yeah. Meemaw kids always got bullies.

Meemaw. And I wasn't sure if that was something... I think they decide. Yeah. What did you call your grandma? My mom, Buddy. What? What?

Buddy was her... Oh. That was like an African. My mom went with Gamma, and I don't like it at all. Sounds like a sorority. That's her decision. That's her decision. That's her.

Yeah, no, my mom is Papa Noni. Brandon's going to be Papa Ting Tong. Dude, I'm not going to be Papa Penis. Is gender reassignment, is that a ting-tong ditch? Just what we called it, man. Oh, man. That's great. So if I have kids, I'm fucked.

They're just going to have to call my parents what. What your, your, your, yeah, your, your siblings have already decided. Yeah, I don't want my, I don't want my kids to call my parents that. But it's over. You didn't have voting rights. I lose. You didn't have voting rights. I lose. When do you decide as a parent what you're calling your penis?

I think it just happens. I don't think it's that weird to just call the thing what it is. I think a four-year-old saying penis is... KB, back me up. I think penis is way more normal than making up something right. I think if you call it something cute, like what are you trying to imply?

I think that should be how it is but it is uncommon right that's fair biggest fucking ting-tong yeah bragging to the kids at the lunch table mommy your areolas are my kids know the name vagina mommy really yeah my son has said I have a penis and my sister has a vagina. Mine was just all pee pee. Everybody had pee pee. Yeah. My mom's pussy is so big. It would have been pussy.

That's so fucking hilarious. Pussy. My kids are like, girls have pussies. That'd be the creepiest thing. High noon is back. The Elm Press pack is here. Featuring the top four High Noon vodka seltzer flavors. It's ranked by El Prez himself.

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look forward to side yeah my my kids like call it out they'll just be like oh stella's got a vagina what was the movie uh is that like a kindergarten cop yeah boys have penis girls have vagina i mean that's clinically yeah spot on are they teaching that in school still? Like early? Yeah, because think about it. Tommy definitely at one point said ting-tong in front of one of his friends and they're like, what? I'm not on trial here. No, I know.

I'm just saying. Just little names. Yeah. You learn what the... I don't know. You want it to be cute. You want it to be as cute as possible. Has anybody ever tweeted

Ting Tong TJ When it was just Brandon It was all Brandon From eight years ago Being like My son's Ting Tong Is a real grown knife I'm just not hitting the Ting Tong

God damn it Or just like horny Replying to women Oh my god What would you do With my fucking Ting Tong My rock hard Ting Tong What would you do

With my Ting Tong My Ting Tong is throbbing right now. I just tinkled for my ting-tong. Wait till my ting-tong comes. It's going to be like a geyser, this ting-tong. I want to put my ting-tong in between your pancakes. We're just still being dirty with all the others. I want to put my ting-tong in that fucking pussy.

My ting-tong is climbing the Empire State Building right now. You're a good dad, Brandon. Yeah, thanks. Ting me a tong. Do some good old ting- talk with the fellas Ting me a tong tonight Ting tong makes it sound like aluminum Yeah Like the College World Series is back

Yeah The ting of the bat The tong of the glove Tong But ding dong is That's used The tongue of the glove. Tongue. But ding dong is used. Ding dong is used. Ding-a-ling.

Ding-a-ling, very common one. Ding-a-ling for sure. PP. Changing the D to a T. That's wild play. Your tussy and your ting-tong. Because pussy is a word that's intended to make it more endearing, cute, I dare say. Yeah. Pussy is a cute word.

I still don't think there's a great word for it yet. I agree. It's not a universally accepted word Because you know Well one woman's trash Is another woman's treasure Some are disgusted by some words Yeah They always talk about this

On the Real Housewives You met them Congrats on meeting them Yeah Real Housewives of Salt Lake City That's huge They were great They said they sent

I think they thought like Barstool was like a person Because they were like Did you get the The kilo we thought like Barstool was like a person Because they were like did you get the It is The kilo we sent you Barstool Barstool Who's top Who's top housewives

Which group It was New York And then now there's a new New York And then there's like an OG New York That was That was like Bethany Was that Yeah

Was that the OG Yes Countess Luann And so Countess is still in the In the mix of Of the OG New York Have you been to her cabaret show? She's such a bad singer They all have

Broadway careers Erica Jane does She has a Broadway career And now Ariana from Vanderpump Rules Is the lead of Chicago. She's like selling out Chicago. Oh, they do that, though. They trade the – like Pamela Anderson was the lead for a while.

Really? Yeah, they switch it out. Is Pamela Anderson in your guys' top women? If you guys had it for women's history? She might be one of all time. Not even hottest, but just top women. Yes. Rosa Parks,

Mother Teresa, Pam Anderson. Susan B. Anthony, Pam Anderson. Top women. Julie Louis-Dreyfus. Yeah. Yes.

And there it is. Yeah. All right, I gotta go to an interview. I apologize. You guys should keep yakking. No, no. Do you want to spin it

real quick? No, but I'm the guy Who stopped it I have to do I have to do the bracket Oh okay alright Yeah now Like pretty Don't you guys have to do

The bracket right now Fuck with you man Oh fuck Alright So then it's not my interview I have to do boy dad In 10 minutes too Oh okay alright

So yeah Why don't we spin the wheel Now Am I taking... Oh, yeah, mousetrap. Should we take mousetrap off? We're waiting to... Oh, yeah, yeah.

Of course, this is long overdue. Permanently off? We'll reassess it in October. Okay, so off. Mousetrap off. Thank you, Ron. Of course. When you saw Sass at the airport,

I love that photo. That picture was crazy. It was completely out of the question. Pretty bad. Is it a bad fit that he's wearing? Passing in the night. He's just him. Yeah.

I don't know. I don't want to say anything negative about him because our friendship is so fragile as it is. It's really hanging on by a single thread. Every time I talk to him, I think it could be the last time we ever speak. Yeah. We may have spoken for the last time. You and Sas?

Sas, yeah. Hope not. I love him. But you might have. I'm comfortable with just observing him. I don't need that mutual interaction.

He does numbers. If you just put up pictures and videos of him, he can kind of sustain an account on his own that he doesn't even run. He's like Miss Peaches, kind of. Yeah.

He's just like a pet of everyone. But unless you're like Sean Gardini, he's not talking to you. You should make an account for him and talk in his voice in the captions. If you just even took pictures of him. Mr. Sassy! Mr. Sasquatch!

Tell me, Taz! Actually, I will. I'll turn all my accounts into just little Sasquatch's third Twitter account. All right, yeah, spin this wheel. By the way, those are... Let me...

Our internet's struggling right now. Uh-oh. Are we lagging? I don't want a non-avoided wheel spin. We are lagging. Have you guys seen those Miss Peaches parody videos? No.. Have you guys seen those Miss Peaches parody videos? No.

It'll be like Miss Peaches after killing a Barstool employee. Have you seen that? It's hilarious. Miss Peaches, how did you get the nuclear launch codes? Miss Peaches. Hopefully not wet. she is very cute

there we go alright alright Roan why don't you skip your flight tonight yeah what do I have to be home for stay for a day what do I have to be home for

hang out I'll get you know what I'll do is I'll do what Sass wouldn't do I'll go out and get drunk with you tonight whoa I'll get hammered

you know I don't get drunk I know you don't so we'll go out and get drunk with you tonight whoa i'll get hammer i will know i don't get drunk i know you don't so we'll do it fuck that's a great self moving tomorrow morning we'll get real drunk together we'll get i'll become an alcoholic if you move here for me yeah that's a fucking that's the best pitch you've ever had anytime you you text me i will go out that's an incredible pitch i can clear that at home yeah i don't want to do this that's fine that's fine i don't want to do this to you um all right well thank you ron we love you love you guys be back soon all right see you guys see you tomorrow please subscribe Outro Music We're doing Yankees love. It's the act.

It's the act. Ting-tong.