The Yard - Ep. 148 - Goodbye Ludwig

Episode Date: May 15, 2024

This week, the boys talk about the loss of Ludwig in a terrible Cesna Taser related incident, finding a replacement for Ludwig, and how we're making a model UN...

🎵 Well guys, it finally happened. Um, welcome to the Yard Podcast episode, The Funeral of Ludwig Ogren. It's brought to you by Chips Ahoy. Double Chunk Crunch. Double Chunk Crunch in macadamia time. Okay, so we saw you put the tears in your eye.

Yeah, you were using eye drops. You're still holding them. You realize you cried on this podcast about a Smash Bros. Yeah, you were using eye drops. You're still holding them. You realize you cried on this podcast about a Smash Bros. tournament that you lost. And our friend is dead because he thought his cat wanted to have sex with him,

but he was wrong. He was wrong. He was wrong, and the cat bit back. The cat... Coots bit him, and it turned into an infection that rampaged through his system.

Coots knew the... Scott Fungal? Coots knew the five-finger death punch. Yeah. That's good. Coots knew the five finger death punch. Yeah. The five paw exploding heart technique. Just trying, just really pissed off that she tried to get fucked.

You can't do the eye drop bit with the eye drop song. This is a film show. We saw what you did. We saw you put it on. No, but it was zoomed in so you probably didn't see it. So, okay, audio listeners, I know a film show. Like, we saw what you did. We saw you put it on. No, but it was zoomed in, so you probably didn't see it. So, okay, audio listeners, I know you're confused. You might be confused.

And, you know, I promise. You're wearing Fendi sneakers? Well, it's a big occasion. I'm not going to show up to my best friend's funeral not, you know, slutted out. Wait, what kind of socks do you have? Socks? My Fred Again socks. My special Fred Again socks. Wait, what kind of socks do you have? Socks? My Fred Again socks. My special Fred Again socks.

Dude, do you guys, I bet maybe he would've wanted it this way. I think he would've wanted it this way. What, when I would show up

in your fucking, what, MeUndies socks? No, these are the fishing ones. They're little fishing ones because we like to fish so much. And they make sure

that your toes don't touch too much because you get all, I get freaked out. You kind of freak out. They're little fishing ones because we like to fish so much. And they make sure that your toes don't touch too much because you get all... I get freaked out. You kind of freak out. They're actually toe socks that prevent my toes from touching because I'm the A word. I don't know if I can say it yet. I'm not sure. And so...

Taking off your shoes to have sex with a woman and having toe socks. And she's just like. Taking them off one toe at a time. Sorry, they get stuck. She's like, I have a headache and my house is on fire. Isn't that crazy? Like, I have to. Oh, fuck.

I gotta go. Man, our best friend. And I'm just doing this. Sorry, you're talking while the air conditioning is going and I can only. I can't hear both. So our best friend's dead. He died. This is, I mean, look, we might be joking around and stuff, having a

fucking good old time, but like this one. I hope he would have wanted that. This one hurts. This one hurts. Brought to you by Chips Ahoy. Double Chunk Crunch. Chips Ahoy. Double Chunk Crunch and also Pepperidge Farm. It was a whole cookie thing.

Well, we have exclusive. We gotta talk to the... There was a brand carve-out for cookies. What we can do is go and tell them, hey, are you really gonna do this at our friend's funeral? Yeah. And we get money from both of them.

Yeah. We have to play this really smart. So, yeah, this episode's also brought to you by Factor Meals. Maybe. Might be. Which we can assure you did not also brought to you by Factor Meals. Maybe. Might be. Which we can assure you did not have anything to do with. Factor Meals, they had nothing

to do with the death of Ludwig Ogren, the YouTuber. There was zero shrapnel in the Factor Meal. Zero. Oh, it is Factor. We actually do a factor to this episode. Well, there is no That'll be later. Some radio waves from Mint Mobile might have done them in.

That'll be later some radio waves from mint mobile might have done him in Just use it a crazy frequency over there That's why it's so cheap. It's that is the other one Wow We guessed the right. What's that shit on the wall at McDonald's like rule 34? Yeah, these the food has whatever in it rule 30 Oh, California proposition Yeah, it's California. This may cause you to look at porn. I'm sorry. If my tax dollars, it gives you cancer.

Yeah, yeah. No, I don't want you to expand the metro anymore. I want every Californian taxpayer to have to look at Sonic fucking Amy. Dude, that would be more helpful than the fucking Prop 65 warning. It's literally on everything. Yeah. It's probably on chemotherapy medicine. What is Prop 65?

It says this is known in the state of California to cause cancer. Yeah. Yeah, significant exposure to chemicals, birth defects, and other reproductive harm. Man, I love when you see the sign in a place you're already spending a lot of time in. I think they should put Prop 8 in restaurants. Which one is that? That was the gay marriage one. Was it? I'm pretty sure.

Zipper, Jimmy. Proposition 8. Proposition 8 was the gay marriage proposition. Is it where you have to put a poster on the workplace wall if you have a gay employee? You have to put a poster of RuPaul up. It's like an OSHA standard it's rupaul wearing a safety helmet it doesn't matter where you can actually see the rupaul poster in the background of the david schwimmer sketch it is it's prop eight you know i love i love gay people

i don't never want to propose i don't propose to any of them i'm not propositioning anybody i'm just saying that was one of my favorite lines in bad santa where he's like uh he's like i heard I don't want to propose to any of them. I'm not propositioning anybody. I'm just saying, that was one of my favorite lines in Bad Santa, where he's like, he's like, I heard you were fornicating with a heavyset woman in the changing room. He's like,

whoa, hey man, I never, I fucked a lot of fat chicks in my time. I never fornicated anybody. Actually, every line in that movie is good. And Ludwig would have loved that movie if he liked watching movies.

Yeah, if he didn't, how did he die again? Well, I think it was esophageal eclasia. Just devastating. Your doctor friend is in town, so he's using all the doctor phrases. We found out. That's the guy with the marshmallow head makes DJ music. Cut has the ears.

We went on this hike today It was me, Dr. Noodle Slam and Miles Because Dr. Noodle Slam is Visiting right now And we were coming back And for various reasons this hike is very difficult For unexpected reasons And Miles has been crushing

Diet Cokes because you got him on the way On a hike or just in general In general. He didn't bring Diet Coke somewhere. It'd be crazy to have, like, the camelback with the DC. Oh, my God. I would fuck with that. The DC camelback?

Dude, the aspartame is coursing through his system, and it's, like, it's changing his body makeup. It's like scorpion DNA. He was talking about, dude, after this is over, I think we deserve a regular Coke. Like, it doesn't even need to be a DC. Okay, let me tell you this from my perspective. Miles comes home right before I'm about to leave, and he was like, dude, like, I thought we were going to die.

He was saying that you guys were rationing water because, like, you got lost so bad. He's like, there was no trail. There was just, like, bushes and cunts, like, fucking panning for gold. Dude, if you die within three miles of McDonald's, I's i don't care what happened you deserve there was as you were far from mcdonald's you're never far from mcdonald's in los angeles that's right it wasn't in los angeles it's just so far okay we had to go to azusa it took forever okay so wait hold on you went you went all this way he comes home he's He's like, I thought we were going to die. And then I see him just eating in and out. As if he touched down on Earth after the space shuttle.

He thought the space shuttle would crash. And he's like, I need to feel something. And he's just destroying it double double. He was like Tony Stark when he gets back from the cave and all he wants is the cheeseburger. Yes. He wants a Big Mac. Also brought to you, our funeral brought to you by McDonald's. Brought to you by the McDonald's sucking fuck up. The boycott is like a complicated thing. Also brought to you, our funeral brought to you by McDonald's. Brought to you by the McDonald's second.

The boycott is like a complicated thing. It's complicated. We signed the deal way before we knew. It's just way. We thought this would happen. His coffin looks like a NASCAR vehicle. The Jeff Gordon of guys who died. The Ludwig funeral brought to you by Corn Flakes.

Yeah. Brought to you by Corn Flakes. Yeah. Brought to you by Kellogg's and also Bush's Baked Beans. Zipper, can you bring up Gavin Cano at the Cornhole World Championship? I'm not fucking with you. We talked about this before.

Everyone in that shit is sponsored by Bush's Baked Beans. It's so fucking funny. It's like, you think there'd be other sponsors and shit, but they like cornered the market on competitive high-level cornhole this is the guy that looked like uh

he got like the bangs yeah he looks like he looks like josh's greek cousin alessio he looks like frame this is it oh my god gavin cox is wearing a hat maybe because all the mean stuff i said oh my god his form his form is insane he started during COVID and then he got really fucking Nice with it and now he's a Bush's baked beans Master that's also not his static partner That guy get it Gavin Wait they're on a team He's got the pods in

That's crazy they're not communicating Jamie is his guy No they do communicate they're like come on boy let's do it Oh like yeah Jamie is the other opponent do you play your teammate is on the other side

yeah yeah yeah and you're playing against each other and uh they like they like hype each other up and shit he's got his airpods in

yeah they should be listening to yay they should be filling up those bean bags with beans ew I'm so wet yeah

on the other side it's just your homie waiting to like they're out with their mouth open oh my god I just got it. Dude, I think that whole marketing campaign is based on the pun that they're beanbags.

The beanbag. I didn't even think about that because I hate puns. Yeah. But that makes sense. I can't see things I hate. No, I can't. Which is why. The biggest setup of all time.

Just fill in whatever you want for the day here. Pause. You at home, go and fill in the Mad Libs. Try to pause the video and find the winning move here. Try to find to take the queen. It's Bandersnatch. They all lead to the same ending. I, I, uh, we, you know, we were all together.

Somber walk. Cause we were remembering our friend for most of it Oh you knew about his death. You knew? And then you went on a walk. I just got here Well I had to walk it off. I found out this I was already dressed like this Because I run to the lunch line. I thought that he I saw him Rest in flowers, and I was like Nick Eaglin called me. Something must have happened. Nick Eaglin called you. You got the line on that. Got the line. You haven't heard about Nick Yingling. Yeah. Same accident.

So he called you. Guess what happened? But we don't have a wreath. Guess what happened? The same shit. They were both... Ludwig was in a Cessna. Nick Yingling, a Cessna right behind him.

The jet stream fucked up the second one. He was calling you. I just saw Ludwig go down. Shay Drizzle said, double kill at the Halo guy. Terrible timing. We all thought it was really strange. like dude our he just our friends just died he can't get fired anymore because his boss just died someone has to step up and fire shake i don't know i already i already put shake down yeah thank god me and shake uh we hung out this weekend or we hung out uh yesterday what is yesterday was sunday, we hung out this weekend. We hung out yesterday. Yesterday was Sunday.

Yeah, we hung out Sunday. And we went and saw Lyle at the Netflix is a joke fest. And they had like outdoor putt-putt. And Shake sees it. He instantly goes feral. He's like, I'm going to own you in that. Let's get in line whenever you want and let's run it. And I just started laughing.

Just like, Shake, you don't have that. Jake, you don't have that. And honestly, shake, you don't have that. Yeah. Jake, you don't have that and you'll honestly, frankly, you'll never have that. He's like the me of guys. I don't think they have that

in Virginia. We get in line. We get in line. Yeah, I don't think he's ever, I think he thinks it's golf. Yeah. Like regular size.

He's like, where's the driver? And he's like, uh oh. So I, so we get in, I fucking just clean up. I just fucking take,

I just destroy him by one point in the end of dead Fucked cuz you can start losing really early and you just want to fucking throw the club over the wall at the clown Yeah, it was Mickey Mouse Mini golf which is Many golfs already Mickey Mouse It was even more Mickey Mouse cuz like it was based on all their shows and each each hole is based on their show So one of them you're you're hitting the ball with a baguette.

And one of them, it's like you can't see where the hole is. It's behind a wall because love is blind or whatever. So it was kind of Mickey Mouse. But there was some that were very hype. Like the very first hole you play, you only get one shot. And if you miss it, you just move on to the next hole. That's like the end of when you do normal mini golf and you get the free game. Yes.

And that's the end of this one. There's like the butthole from Duneune or whatever i don't know what it actually supposed to be maybe it is that is that's like someone's worm's mouth it's the worm's mouth it looks like maybe it's the butthole of the worm and it's always moving backwards worms only have buttholes that's how they eat it uses its much like the french the french do yeah the french do have teethed assholes. Everyone knows this. Ludwig actually confirmed this for me the other day. So I'm beating Shake by one point consistently

because I just did better on a single hole. At the very end, we rock, paper, scissors for who goes first. He loses, he goes first. And he hole-in-ones the final hole. So I have to hole-in-one the hole. Oh, shit. Or I tie or lose. Yeah. And I also hole-in-one the hole. Oh, my God. And so... Hole in ones the final hole so I have to hole in one the whole shit or I tire lose Yeah, and I also hold my god and so

Fake shake got drizzled on yeah. Yeah, you can you busted a nut over shakes face Okay in public you busted thick chunky come dude come what sponsored by Bush's be Double chunk chips ahoy. Sponsored by Green Giant Canned Hummus. I don't know. Sponsored by Blue Diamond Almonds. Blue Diamond Almonds. Sometimes there's a screwdriver in there.

And it's funny, it's smoky flavor. Smoky. Because that's how Ludwig died. In a smoking fire, a fireball. That's right. Somebody firebombed him in cutie's home yeah it was very it was awful there was really nothing funny about it no there was nothing funny about it but blue blue diamond almonds did call us up and they're like there's a connection have you seen cornhole yeah we want to do that for you guys to sponsor funeral podcast you know how like the

casino moguls like firebombed friendly Geordie's homes? Do you know about that? Yeah. They probably did. Allegedly. Yeah. Allegedly. It was Blue Diamond Almonds for Ludwig.

Oh, my God. That's so fun. They set it all up. Well, people don't know that we actually have known Ludwig's going to die for a while now, and his make-a-wish wish was he wanted to see Daniel Tosh. Yeah. That's why we ended up doing yeah the biggest hero we did with that was that make-a-wish made very early it was because of his esophageal ecclesia oh he knew yeah he knew the end was coming and he's like when that when I'm in that Cessna he was he actually he thought it was Rob Dyrdek you don't really understand he's like i know this guy from that uh that 15 minute podcast he does about building businesses

i like where's chanel dude why is it rob dyrdek okay so for those who don't know rob dyrdek has a podcast it's about like personal growth and building businesses it's like 15 minutes long and it's just him talking to a mic it's just a white guy who did ayahuasca one time and has been riding that sort of... No, he did ridiculousness 1,000 times. So drop that down, dumb piece of shit. That's the droid. I think there's two Rob Dyrdek's,

and one's made of metal, and one's a human being. One's made of soft flesh. Yeah. I think Chanel West Coast is the only human being. He should put Chanel on the show. Dude. Imagine it's Chanel West Coast and I think Chanel West Coast Is the only human being He should put Chanel On the show Dude Imagine it's Chanel West Coast

And then metal Chanel West Coast Like Sonic Whoa And her stats are busted In Sonic Fighters She's like I'm imagining Chanel West Coast

In Blade Runner And she's the only Born I thought you were Going to say blackface That's what I thought The BL was really that's where you go

that's your first BLA I will say in elementary school blackface and Blade Runner sit right next to each other oh in class for all of elementary school they get to know each other very well

they catch up but it's hard you know it's hard when uh when your best friend is just uh you don't seem that cut up about it you haven't even cried you're talking to him oh me i thought you were talking you were looking at the wreath no because i'm longing i haven't cried because i i'm not capable of crying i made tear ducts removed because it was gay to do wow so i i said i had it was essentially heteronormative affirming surgery does this make sense to you yeah yeah he he apparently lovey died he was tasing his penis yeah because he wanted to see if there was a bone in it

so if he got electrocuted he could see Like Blanca It was too much For his little heart It was too much For his French heart Just took him out You know what was funny He talked about this a lot He kept saying

Well why do they Call it a boner Yeah And he said it again In his French accent There's no bone in it Is it bono I don't know

I don't know Why they call it bono But whatever you do Don't electrocute your penis. We told them many times, do not start the taser and watch the electricity arc go between the metal things and want to put your penis in between that like a field goal.

Don't do that. Don't. And then Ludwig said, you can't stop me. You can't stop me. I'm going to put my penis in the middle of that. He said it was the French Midsommar. That's right. That's what he called it. He was so creative the French Midsommar. That's right. That's what he called it. And it's...

He was so creative to the end of his life. I miss him. I will stop missing him soon. Yeah, because the Patreon check will go from one-fourth to one-third pretty soon. Dude, oh my God. We'll make quite a bit more money. You guys should just hold on to your subs.

Yeah, zipper stuffing too. I know Ludwig may be your favorite member of the Yard podcast, but just hold on. That's. Yeah, zipper-stuffing too. I know Ludwig may be your favorite member of the Yard podcast, but just hold on. That's what he would have wanted. Yeah, he would have wanted you to continue this podcasting forever. I think he would have wanted us to be

because we need your support right now. Okay, maybe just Archie cut to us while he does it? Yeah, he doesn't cut to us. We're looking at Aiden. Oh my God, sweetheart. Don't wipe it off after you do it. That's the point is to see it. Yeah, take it out of your... Okay. Oh my God, he. No, don't wipe it off after you do it. That's the point is to see it. Take it out of your

Okay. Oh my god. He's so overwrought with emotion. Oh, it's either one one of two things happening got clutched on by Nick Best friend Penis in a Cessna. I'm just not sure which it is. I just pulled the memories. Ludwig was there. Yeah, Ludwig, he ate the packet in the beef jerky. He thought it was a Japanese treat.

He thought he could read Japanese. It said in Japanese, do not eat. And he misread it because he's not really good at it. He thought it said Domo Arigato. And he just ate seven of them. And it dried out his insides. His stomach looked like the puffer fish in the Simpsons episode when they stab it. And I miss him. I do.

I miss him so much. You know, and this one, I think let's go around and just talk about how he's affected our life. Right now, immediately, looking at this rose, this pink rose, it looks like a butthole. Yep, I think of heinous as well to say. I think the first time I've met him honestly, which was seeing his butthole. And there's like even little seeds in it.

Which he also had. He also had some corn seeds. He gave us his seeds in a way. I think I saw a coupon in there. Yeah, there was definitely a Zoo Books tiger poster. A Chuck E. Cheese ticket. And flowers are so beautiful. Do you think we could stuff him?

A little taxidermy? A little GameCube controller screw. I saw that in there. Do you think QT would want to have him taxidermied in their home? Depends on the pose. If he's very scary. It him listening it's him like i hear you wow it's him remembering their anniversary it's him halfway through replying to a text to her that says what a great message here's my reply here's my reply and very quickly by the way

the time at the top of the phone is the same as the sent time, so you know it just happened. Is he so timely? Dude, I said, whenever in the group chat we were talking, you said Bundun was like, hey, put your, why are your clips channel separate? You should put it on the main. Yeah, Bundun did the thing where he, you know sometimes someone will ask

you a question, but really it's a suggestion? Yeah. Bundun, which was appreciated, because Bundgoat. Bun Goat. Because Bun Goat is the Bun Goat of shorts. If you don't watch Bun Dun on YouTube. Ran. Ran Ludwig. Sorry. So Bun Dun messaged me and said,

why don't you put your shorts on the main channel? Yeah. And I said, because when we started uploading them, it was a long time ago and shorts were different back then and I never re-evaluated it. That's true. We didn't. Oh my god. We could have cashed in on the fucking sub wave. Dude, we might

have a slightly bigger podcast if we would have done that. So we said that and then I said in the group chat, this is with Ludwig's Alive, I said Bundun runs you and then I said oops sorry wrong chat. And then I texted him. He probably replied to that one he actually did it

I don't think he liked that cuz he was Bundles me that in in so in like the short form content creator discord spaces where they where they hash out all the You know strategies. Okay, They say that some people are tinfoil hat short form people who think, well, you don't actually want to get fans out from shorts because those are short attention span fans. This is exactly what Ludwig said before. Oh, did he?

He's on this wave now. He's comparing it to live streaming because the short guys would come in and be like, watch shorts, pussy, or whatever, and he'd be like well these they don't actually want to watch a live stream they won't stick around yeah yeah it's basically the theory is that they lower your retention which puts you off the front page because they lower your watch time wow because they click in and they decide i don't want to watch an hour and a half i want to

watch more shorts more shorts i like it and then bundan said don't believe their lies it was actually already on my hand he He said, check your hand. I was like, whoa. He said, check your hand. It's going to be, the penis will be tased off like a chicken wing. And then it said there's no bone in that thing. And I was like. Bundun would make a short about how like, did you know there's no bones in your penis?

We tried tasing Mongo's penis to see if it bones. It's just like in his BJJ outfit, just like... But I realized that, and Bundon is not one of these guys, but when he described like, yeah, those guys will tell you don't get fans from shorts. They don't know what they're talking about. There's no evidence. Oh my God.

And I was like, the guy he's talking about, it might be the worst conversation you could ever have. Oh, dude. Like view maxers? View maxers in short form content who are all about like how do i make candy well okay i will say if bundan is just the other side of that coin like he's not that different from them his job his goal was to get i like him i like him too and he's my friend so that makes it different it does make it different

it makes the rules are different when it's my friend. Yes. And that's what I believe. That is true and that will always be true. And he's also Australian which I like.

That's more interesting. But he says his opinion sits in opposition of our friend Ludwig who passed away. God.

How do you wrestle with that? Perhaps we replace him. Oh my. Dude Bundun do you want a job? Bundun would be an

excellent replacement. Because Bundun's a big YouTuber. Dude, Bundun would actually be the closest thing to Ludwig we could get. I'm not kidding. He would like set up for the clip all the time. He's like a huge YouTuber. Do you think that? He like started in Melee. Yeah, he's

one of the only people that meets so many of the qualifications. He does play Puff. He plays Puff. Dude, I'm not kidding. Bundun. Oh my god, and he can lift a lot. Oh my god, he's so strong. He lifts more than Ludwig.

Dude, this is a big deal. I think it's Bundun for the yard time. Ugh. This is good. We've like built his resume for him. Imagine having this conversation at someone's funeral. Which one do we get? Dude, Ludwig, shut up.

We are talking. Who do you think, if the podcast, you know, well, not if, because Ludwig has passed and we have to replace him. He died. This is not a new bit. We've done this bit before. It was more funny when it was Aiden. It's more sad now. It's more sad now because it's Ludwig.

If it was you, it would be way funnier aiden okay go on you get gabe from the office be so sad because you'd be cut up not a love is gone who do you think would be the most excited to replace ludwig in the space dance yeah it's gonna be like sandra be literally lactating about it you think so you think he wants to do this oh my god oh my god oh my god you think Stan's wants to sit

next to you while you while you yell and scream cringy cronchmas next to him to make fun of him let me tell you

I'd make his life miserable I would say yeah Stan's you can come on the show and then I'd do this like a fucking cartoon bully

I think I think that you, I think that Stans' mental resilience would impress you. He's very resilient. You know, we did an unpaid intern, and I will say, Stans is a pretty fun guy.

What can I say? So let's scooch this on out of here. Let's get our man in. Dude, that is such a beautiful wreath. I know. It costs $300. Which is a worthwhile tax for our friend's death. It was also a write-off. Right.

So it's not really all too bad. I wouldn't want anything we invested into his funeral to not be a write-off. One rose for every child he got into smoking. Oh, that's so beautiful. Well, one per, but it's times one it's yeah it's like a scale of per capita it's like yeah one because we did that with every rose we'd be in a fucking uh goddamn garden right oh yeah dude we've been the denmark tulip fields the same amount of uh the same amount of cokes he drank that killed him that day yeah he just tried to drink about

he drank five 35 Cokes. It was Ludwig said, the aspartame can't hurt me and nothing ever can. What was the amount of Cokes I said I could drink? 50. Wasn't it 50? And how long? It was like seven. A day or an hour?

A day. I think it was a day. We don't know. Liz Zipper, can you look it up? I think it was a day. We were talking about this today when Miles brought up the Coke. You reckon like... And he was just so set on having a regular one instead of a DC. Were you not as scared as him on this hike?

Dude, he came home like scarred. At certain points... 30 in one day. 30 in one day. Okay. 30 per day? Like, was it... No, no.

It was just one time. One time. We found out. The comments said a lot of good math. You know what happens to you, Aiden, when you don't eat calorie-smart meals that Factor provides? What happens to me? You end up like Ludwig.

Ooh. That is true. Dude, you know what he was eating before Dave was passing? Dave's hot chicken. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. It wasn't Factor. It wasn't Factor.

Did he stop eating Factor? No. If he stopped eating factor if he if he kept eating factor he'd be right in front of us right now he's bantering he said he'd eat factor until the day he died yeah well the day he didn't guess what happened factor delicious ready to eat meals that make it easy to eat better and stay alive and save money and time he could have saved his life you could have saved every everything that you are able to save is through factor it could have been so simple you got like i mean imagine also imagine if he was eating the protein plus he would he had 30 grams of protein and it said that boulder wouldn't have crushed him no it would have bounced off his shit like a bouncy ball like

a like a metapod if he was eating protein plus and he could have he could have used all the meal choices he could have put juices smoothies 55 weekly add-on options, 35 plus meal choices. Premium ingredients if you want to live that premium life. But now he's in a premium hell. He's living a cremium life in hell. And there's no cream for him. Why would he want hot chicken four times a day instead of that? If you don't want to end up like this guy right here.

We have a website. We have a website. We have a website for you. It's called factormeals.com slash theyard50. You can use code theyard50 50% off

and then 20% off plus after the next and then Wow, you fucked all that. Off the, off the, off the, but I'm actually having a stroke because I didn't have a factor.

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some of the box plus 20% off next box in your subscription. America's number one ready to eat meal kit. And America's number one my favorite best friend is now gone.

My number one. And he's gone because he didn't listen to us and he didn't use code the yard 50. And I'm a box head. The other guy. Did he get startled by his own

gas? Sorry, yeah. By your own creation? A little pee came out. A little pee came out? We gotta get out of that. Zipper! Okay. Come on, pull me back out. Oh, man. I love doing this show with you guys.

Yeah, man. It makes me sad that we'll never do it. What makes me sad, we'll never do it with him again. We have to ask, we have to let the people decide. Do you want the show to continue? He went to the big old premium episode

in the sky. You know, every episode of the podcast has a chance he'll come back in the premium. So you better. You might as well subscribe because. Yeah. He thought he might get resurrected. Every day we'll try a different spell. Yeah.

We're going to. You know, we should have a necromancer guest and they can like try different skull like powers. Crystals. Yeah. Crystals. Crystals. We can see.

Because I think the nature of how he died would, you know, because it was, it was just a giant fucking whirlpool that opened up in the ground. Mm-hmm.

Because he cursed God. And, you know, maybe, maybe he'll get forgiven for that. I think we'll find someone. We'll just bring on women from Topanga for the rest of the show.

What? Are you, what? From Topanga? Yeah. Like from Boy Meets World from Topanga for the rest of the show until what? from Topanga? yeah like from Boy Meets World Topanga? what? what are you talking about?

Topanga? when you say Topanga what do you mean? the city in California? I love that I'm the bridge between you because I know both your references but you don't know each other's

whoa this is beautiful it's like a blind date what is he referencing? I'm gonna take it to Topanga I'm just referencing a place in California I took a pill in it to Topanga. I'm just referencing a place in California. I took a pill in Topanga.

Topanga was the name of Corey Matthews' girlfriend for the entire run of Boy Meets World, the Disney sitcom. Oh my god. Topanga, California. I was talking about Topanga, California. Where if you took a pill there, you would probably drive your car off the road like Tiger Woods. She kind of smiles like Tarek. No, can you bring it back up yeah okay yeah you can't say that the top left yeah it's like it's like tarik

maybe they're both turkish maybe you should be a little more sensitive you know i'm sorry i didn't realize that that was a turkish if you're a Turkish listener, do you struggle with basic human emotion? The four of you out there? I just want to know. You know what? I want to assemble the UN of Yard listeners. That's a good idea. I want, yeah, one person from every nation.

Let's make a channel on our Discord. The Yard Model UN. Dude, oh my God. This is a great idea. Wait a minute. This is really good. And they make all our decisions. Do you think we have someone from every single country?

Like, Belarus? No, absolutely not. I doubt it. I don't think we have someone from every country. Do you think we have, like, a raw, like, true, dyed-in-the-wool Chinese listener? Yeah. Like, that grew up in China? Like, I don't know, dude. On it, straight up, no.

Straight up. No way. So many people. Like, was born, grew up in, and has never left mainland China? I guess I can't prove that part. Well, this is our time. Someone simply needs to say, like, just that they are, and I'll believe it. But if you lie in this you're a

fucking asshole i want you to know i'm telling you we are we are billy billy weekly uploads away from this being just yes that's weird dude we should put radstads on the case get us huge in china dude i'll be real they don't come up well it only shows me the first 10 yeah what is it read it off united states 62 easy canada united kingdom australia germany sweden philippines uh netherlands india new zealand let's fucking go no philippines no france let me not really pulling his weight india that's crazy am i that's not crazy, that's not that crazy. I don't know shit. There's just so many people.

It's a fucking billion and a half people. We've probably been. And a ton of them speak. Billion and a half people live in China. We've probably just been left on in like a laundromat somewhere. That's fucking hype. And that's the viewers. In China?

On autoplay? Someone's getting a $1 haircut and we're playing in the background. And they're like, what is this shit? Turn this shit off. Well, their friend died. Oh, that's awful. They seem to not remember correctly how

it happened, though. It's weird that it keeps changing. He looks so good in that picture, too. He always looked good. That was a big problem I always had with him is that he always looked so damn we want him to look worse and he surely does now you know do you think there's a way ludwig dude imagine ludwig got you know how some women get

breast reduction surgery and it's like an affront to god yeah what if ludwig got like ugly surgery oh also an affront to god yeah yeah it It's the same idea because you're just taking away something beautiful from the world. I would love to get in like the the the me builder for him. Yeah. Just like drag his eyes up a little bit in different directions. Yeah. Like just something. Just something.

Right. Give him the nose. That's like which human nose is that based off of? Dead ass. I think I'm having a brain blast. I think there's an episode of Nip Tuck tuck which was a show about plastic surgeons on fx and they were like how can i fuck up my friend for a show about that because you know the name you can reverse engineer the name and know what the show is about it's nice yeah yeah it's about i don't know tucking your

penis i don't know how it works but but yeah I think a guy was like wanted to be ugly. So they like made him ugly and he's like, finally. Finally. Surely this happened. I'm sure it's happened. This sounds like a... Well, Zac Efron did it by accident.

We can still do this with his body. Zac Efron's not ugly. Oh, no, he's not ugly. I shouldn't say that. That's cruel. He just looks like if you built him in Roblox now. Which is not...

What I said is way less creative, I guess. Yeah. But like, it sucks to have that idea where it's like, you grow up as Zac Efron

and then you're like, I still don't look good enough. And then you go under the knife. Because he, he did look good enough. I mean, he did. He just looked great.

He looked great. And he was so good at basketball. What are you fucking giggling about at Ludwig's funeral for? What are you giggling at? You dumb piece of shit. What is ready? Ready? Oh.

Oh. Yeah, it's like, you don't need to do that, OG. Everyone thinks you're beautiful. You don't need the Elon Musk chin surgery. He does kind of have an Elon Musk face. You know what I'm saying? Wait, did Elon Elon Musk chin surgery He does kind of have an Elon Musk face You know what I'm saying Wait does Elon Musk get chin surgery Dude it's thought that Elon had like a procedure

To give him like a more angular jaw That's so cool Because there's like pictures of it and stuff And like old pictures and comparisons I don't know if it's true But I think spreading misinformation about someone like Elon Musk Is totally cool I think he honestly grew out his hair.

You think so? You think that's natty? I think that his brain is so powerful that he thought about hair more. And then it kind of came out. He was like, you know what? This hair loss thing actually isn't real. And also chess is a boring game that doesn't make sense. Chess is solved by robots.

It's solved by robots and then he just fucking did this really hard and then he got it all back. Well, all asterisk. Most of it. But yeah, you know, he'll be,

he's actually here at the funeral. He's somewhere around here. He's looking for Ghislaine. Yeah, they all go back. He doesn't know she's in jail. Who else is in the other room? They met on set of Mr. Beast.

Elon, Ghislaine, who she got leave from prison to be here. She didn't want to leave that damn circle. She wanted that million. She does have the ankle monitor. That's how it started. That's how she got her bread in the first place. I would say the beauty of playing every side on every issue like he did so beautifully on mogul mail is that all types of

people come to your funeral it's actually good i'm kind of worried like they're in the other room right now i think it'll be a bloodbath like there's a lot of people here that don't see eye to eye and that's that's why immortal techniques here i know i don't see eye to eye. And that's why he... Immortal Techniques here. I know! I don't even know how they know each other. Which is crazy. Some Minecraft server. Yeah, they play... It was the Dance with the Devil SMP. And, you know, Ludwig... That was just content.

Charlemagne kept telling me that he doesn't like Harry Styles' outfit. I thought, keep that to yourself. We got DJ Academics in here. It's the ultimate showdown of Ultimate Destiny out there. It's just Chuck Norris is fighting Gandalf.

It's literally just so many fencing takes on Vogelman. You would not believe, dude. It's fucking, there's David Foster Wallace is in the other room. It's incredible.

There's a group of Nazis out there. I don't even know how they know each other. Apparently they kind of fucked out there. I don't even know how they know each other. Apparently they kind of fucked with him. I don't know. They sort of heard some of his takes and thought, yeah, I guess we agree.

Nick Fuentes and AOC are shaking hands in the other room. They're seeing eye to eye. Maybe that was the beauty of Ludwig all this time. We just needed one big moment to break. Let's get that Model UN vote going, actually. That's what I'm saying. We can do some real fucking work in this world Vladimir Putin can be convinced bam are Jared Obama on a melee setup

They've been going back and forth, you know, I play like a pussy April where are you? I I don't even know where to fuck we're Phil and April man we're Phil and April where are you I think also that if Elon and Putin if they showed up they did get the invitation he could have taught him how to do the hair jutsu

and then he would have fucking quit freaking out about all Elon would have taught Vlad how to do the hair jutsu that'd be beautiful I learned about it I should know this because I'm here But just to clarify So we're at Ludwig's funeral in the other room

And we're doing the show We had to do the podcast It's Monday It's actually kind of rude That he didn't tell us he'd be dead If he told us sooner we'd know If he had given us a heads up about he'd be dead this week. Well, we did have the Chips Ahoy mini Chip Chunky deal.

That he brought. They're going to be mad that he's not in it. And they might not pay out. They'll pay out. Which is actually maybe fine because Pepperidge Farm might have had an issue with them both being on the show at the same time anyway. So maybe it's... We're putting our fingers in a lot of pies, boys. Alright?

That's how you get paid in this damn ass world, ass. But I want you guys to sound off. Do you want the show to continue? Keep your sub going. Yeah, whether or not we work is up to you. We might be gone for months. We might just go grieving right so

But remember that we're grieving I'll be grieving so hard for you like I'll be grieving it so you're gonna have to keep paying Cuz then I can't I have to work while I grieve that sounds so cruel to do to somebody This is you know this is my maternity leave. It's the opposite of maternity leave. It's my eternity leave. So I'll love him forever. We get five days of bereavement pay.

Wow. That's pretty nice. Another wonderful proposition. It was a bill? I don't care. I don't care what the difference is. I don't care. I think it's strange that so many Cokes killed him,

but he could drink Red Bull like water. Red Bull was such a beautiful gift to him, honestly, in every way. He used to put it in a little bowl. He told us Red Bull never stopped drinking it. Never. Ever. I was like, I don't want to say that. There was a bowl about 3X larger than Coots in the morning next to it. And he Ever. I was like, I wouldn't say that. There was a bowl about

3x larger than Coots in the morning next to it. And he'd lap that shit up. He'd lap that shit up. Like a horse. Like a fishbowl at a fucking... At a bar. You see any wings coming in? You see him coming in like I'm a damn Dark Souls boss? And she said, please respond

to my message I sent you. Please respond to me. Also, you leave your pee in the toilet. It's so dark. Dude, it's dark as fuck always. But how can it be dark when you're getting all your daily hydration from... That's actually the biggest thing Ludwig has capped about is that his piss is actually... He talks about like he's hydrated all the time. His piss is so yellow.

He's had dark ass piss. He just leaves the darkest pisses in the toilet And it I think I'd rather see Ludwig shit than his than his dark Cuz it's like dark ether looks like if you turn the light off. It'll just like still be glowing I think I could tell if I just saw all of your poops in a toilet I would know which ones is whose no I if I knew this challenge is coming up i could i could mimic hold on hold on what i could do it i can do it i can do an impression do you need enough time to establish the vibes because you think you could raw guess what each of our poop was like or do you think that or or is this enough time to spy on us so

that you could see what the poop is? It's kind of like I can like bank an impression. He always did know Australian. Like a way that like I could take a dump and like kind of be like, this is I'm pretty sure what Aiden's dump would be like. Kind of like meek and slippery. God, surely we've done this bit before. No.

Come on. Not on the funeral we haven't. I want to say there's a bit where you said you could poop like a sine wave. That sounds so familiar. I think I did say that. But I think that's different. Because I'm saying I could do a perfect imitation. In the Chips Ahoy mini chunks imitation poop off.

You're telling me back against the wall you can nail an poop. Oh no, it's diarrhea Dave. You can do it whatever. It's a tough matchup but I think I can make it happen. The thing is, so I could poke up out the water peep. I could kill somebody, right? I could murder somebody

and then perform a poop imitation and then when the fucking cops come and like do forensics, they'd be like, this was Diarrhea Dave. This was Diarrhea Dave. He's the one that. No, that's the signature of a killer. We know who that is.

And it's like, no, it was me. Because I can do that. Because my my butthole is like it's like a Greek like pottery maker. I do this all pookie psy killer. I do this all day, dude. Let's do poop criminals and poop legends. That's cool. The Zodiac, but he's just mailing a piece of his dump

to the fucking San Francisco Times or whatever. To random people. Are they killing anyone? They're just like, ugh. This sucks. Inside was a beautiful rose. Okay, cool.

Oh, no, no. Come on. This is so gross. I hate this. I just keep thinking about John Wayne Poopy. John Wayne Poopy and the poop clown.

And then he went to his house and they dug through the base of his house and in his gardens and they just kept finding more shit. There's just more poop. There's just more shit everywhere. He didn't really do anything wrong. He's just gross. And the garden's lovely.

He never had to pay for fertilizer a day in his life. He's a nasty guy. Upper deckers are banned in this competition. Oh, come on. They're banned, dude. Prison rules. No, not everyone can get up there. We got to even the UCF.

Patching out upper deckers in the mini chips, chunky Slim Jim Invitational. The lid doesn't open on the Wii. Somebody has to make the rules. You have to boot up the toilet by holding a lighter.

We don't do it like competitive Call of Duty. We get all the pros in a facebook group chat and they just hash it out they say yeah ga uh no corn it's no corn ruins the game no corn and no peanuts uh no you can't intentionally hemorrhage because you know sometimes that touch of red is an artisanal take but you can't force it it's gotta be a luck of the draw playing with a squad of potty you have your angles fucking chosen for you. Yeah Actually all of auto-aim, and I don't want to even hear it. Yeah, they would all play the squatty potty

There's literally zero skill. I just come out with a hitch. There's no skill I draw the line of bidets cuz we all have one no it's also unenforced days are like boxes though cuz it's like It's also unenforceable. Bidet's are like boxes though. Online it's unenforceable. You can't see what pressure they're using when they're sitting down. I was thinking it warms up your ass. So it puts you in a sense of relaxation

that you don't have to practice or fight for anymore. I'd be such a real shitter, dude. Maybe you are a real shitter. I'd be such a real pooper, dude. I swear. You take giant dumps. You never send me pictures? Well, yeah, I used to.

You got weird about it. Too many possibly new fans we may have gotten in the past week. Maybe. I don't think we have new fans in the past week. No, he got some new fans. And just for context, Nick takes giant dumps. Big tings. He's a big ting.

He's always constipated. Culmination. He cheats, dude. You queue it up for a dump. Big tings. He's a big ting. He's always constipated. He cheats, dude. You queue it up for a month. I thought cheating. He doesn't want to persevere. And then you pop queue and it's the biggest dump of all time, but it's because you're fucking backed up.

I don't think he likes this, so it makes it kind of okay. Oh, it's so easy. Why don't you do it, huh? Pull up your bootstraps. I will. Get a big poop out. Your feminine ass poops. Dude, if you were a true pooper, I'd be so much nicer to you. If I was a real shitter.

If you were a real shitter, dude. You don't even know. I can tell your poop from a mile away, bro. It looks like rabbit poop. Comes out with pebbles. Comes out. Dude, I hate when that happens. Real.

You get little circles. Yeah, and it's like, I wanted a full meal. I didn't ask for boba. Okay, so now all the women are gone. Yeah, now that no one on the planet will have sex with us. What do we want to talk about now? Back to lovely? The world's our incel oyster.

I mean, we could talk about how good he was to us. He was. You know, he was always so. He gave me a job. It wasn't that good to me. Gave you a job. It wasn't good to Nick. It wasn't that good to us. He was. You know, he was, he was always so. He gave me a job. It wasn't that good to me. He gave you a job. It wasn't good to Nick. It wasn't that good to me.

He used to, he used to try to kiss me. He used to put you at work. Yeah. He used to try to kiss me at work. I don't know. He used to kiss you at work. Yeah.

And he didn't want to kiss. He did that with every employee. He tried to kiss you at work. And he saw that David Schwimmer video. And then, and then he'd say, and then he'd say, we're cool, right?

After you, after you, you know, wrenched back he saw that david schwimmer video he thought he thought it was a manager training he's like yeah he just weirdly thought oh this is how i need to speak the second video in the training that they added in is insane is the bar one dude the bar one is crazy david Schwimmer is like really uncomfortable to watch, but it feels like a realistic scenario. But the second one, the second one with, and I always forget his name,

but he just is full on lifting up his co-worker's ass at the bar. Like picking her up by the ass. And I was like, hmm, I guess I shouldn't do that at Mobile Moves. He goes, poop loading just kidding did we think we'll be like oh who is that for and then you like to you like look into the world like people who like watch minion movies and you're like you know what it's for people like that like there are true dumb asses out there like you know what i never thought about that i have a genius idea we take the david schwimmer video we get Otto or a hacker we know to rip it and then we put the friends theme song in front and then we edit it

Like a friend's episode. I'm good news for you. You don't need to rip it. It's on YouTube I was gonna say this has to exist on you has to exist with a laugh track already Yes, you laugh track and then you do It's just So it's better like cutting the other character and act like they're a character in Friends or to cut to Friends footage of Joey talking

and then go back to David Schwimmer no no it's better to edit it as light as possible yeah yeah putting in like laugh tracks and stuff kind of like brighten it up too

it's a very dark piece it is literally it grabs the butt cheek and it's they're laughing or it'd be like oh yeah

well this one with David Schwimmer and what's-her-name from Atlanta, it's like it's a much more... They're such good actors. They're so good. It's crazy. The scene is incredibly well-acted. That's her name, Zazie Beetz, right? I don't know if it's Zazie Beetz. It sounds like I made that up, but I'm pretty sure it's her real name.

So it's really good. Guys, if you haven't watched this, this is a human resources training video that is really popular, and it's really awkward it's really good. Guys, if you haven't watched this, this is a human resources training video that is really popular and it's really awkward to watch. It actually, it did a good job because you remember how uncomfortable you feel and you're like, that's a good feeling to connect

to something like harassment. Cool. Dude, they had one trick question in there. I swear to God. They have every true, every true false question in that quiz, by the way, true if you do Don't grab not her but yes

Then what does it mean? It's opposite day Your mouse moves in reverse directions Dude it's just the way it's shot to she's so it's just oh my god. Oh Hate it dude. Dude. That's so fuck. It's like a voyeuristic POV. Yeah, it makes it even more uncomfortable The dialogue is incredibly realistic and and it makes you just can't crawl Good job. Yeah, they did Do their job I was gonna say

good job yeah they did they did do their job I forgot what I was gonna say I remember it wasn't related but he one of the questions all of them are like you know should you should you touch your co-workers ass like true or false which and you know there's a guy out there who's like

fuck what's the situation is she in a fire and only her butt's poking out and I have to pull her out of the building dude it's like if there's this old tumblr post it's like okay what if it's like a make a wish kid's final wish and he's a white kid and he's also about to die is it okay if he says the n word then it's like just people really really trying to yes i'd wobble him just like try to logic man a situation it's like what are we doing the the question they ask is

like uh the the hypothetical employee is asked is told by their manager is like hey i think you look really sexy would you like to go out sometime and then the employee says no and then three months later there has been no follow-up to this initial ask. There has been no additional harassment. And apparently, we're now existing three months later. Apparently, two weeks ago, the same manager has told me that if I continue to show up late for work, I will be fired. Because in the last two weeks, I've showed up late like four times. I will be fired because in the last two weeks I've showed up late like four times. And the question is like, is this a quid pro quo scenario where the employee can argue that the manager was harassing them because of like their initial comment?

Is this one of the questions? Yes. Oh, wow. All of the questions. There's so many questions. They're all incredibly easy. And every single answer is true, except this one. Then you said Squidward somehow involved.

When does that come into the... It's big like Squidward's nose, and your manager says, can I see it? Your manager asks if you want to see the vein in it. Do you have to show them? True or false? in it. Do you have to show them? True or false? Your manager just pops his head into the doorway

like a cartoon character and says, team bigger than an iPhone? And what, is that appropriate? Is that true? 13, no way. Which iPhone is it big? If your manager asks you which model of iPhone it's bigger than, do you have to

answer? And that's what Ludwig asks me when we worked out. And that's why we had to kill him. We did. We had to put him down. And you know what? I took a dump that looked just like somebody else's. I took a dump in Ibiza.

I took a dump in Topanga. I took a dump in Topanga. And Corey was pissed. Cutie messaged me today asking for, she wants a name for a new podcast she's working on

and she was like, what do you think of these two names? And one of the names was the name of another podcast that I've seen before and I said,

that one's taken. The Joe Rogan experience. She said, yeah. So I said, that one's taken, so probably that one. And then we had a conversation about it

and she was like, well, do you have any other ideas? And I thought, I want you guys' honest opinion on what you think of this idea. It's a podcast with three women. And it's called... Dude. You're sleeping because it's a girl podcast? Oh my god, Ludwig's dead.

Yeah. Oh my god. Yeah. How? Okay. So three women. Three women. What happened? Well, shewig's dead. Yeah. Oh my god. Yeah. How? Okay. The three women. Three women. What happened?

Well, she showed him the first episode. Three women. Just kidding, obviously. Oh, man. We got like that fucker in the office. I want your guys' opinions. We're gonna get fired. We should go out, though, sometime.

Yeah, Brewski's fucking not with this guy anymore. He's gone. gone all right go ahead my idea while you guys it's probably a super one so i had the idea for the name the mothership i like that is that not an amazing name the mothership is good a three woman-led podcast i think that's really good cutie hated it what the fuck she hated it she goes the fuck? She hated it. Why? She goes, Nick, she said it was worse than my first idea, which I'm not making a joke, was I'm having my period

in Sephora podcast. She said that is a better idea than the mothership. What? And I said, I was so proud of it. Dude, she's smoking fucking crack. Dude, the mothership is sick. Is it? And then I said, your logo is a little alien with lipstick, like taking a selfie or like doing a bad bitch thing.

Type of shit. Type of nail or whatever. Type of shit. I was like, it's money. She hates it. Am I crazy? Here's the thing. I'm going to level with you.

I feel like I genuinely need a woman's opinion on this because maybe I'm just locking in on spaceship and my male brain just turns any idea related to that into cool. Maybe, yeah. But I feel like the layers in the name make it very exciting and fun. I think so too. There are so, and this is related, there are so few women on this world who like aircraft that I think that's a problem i think so i think there's too few women in this world who aren't beautiful for one for one wait

too few are we good aren't women is that a good thing yeah it's a double negative but if i were to say there's too few that are beautiful that would be bad that would be bad because they're all beautiful well there's a couple that aren, there's a couple that aren't. There's a couple that aren't. Most of them are. Well, I think... All right. What if I were to say in retort to that, that all of them are beautiful?

Just to be clear, he's not beating the misogyny allegations right now. What I said is worse than women don't like planes? Well, he said it. Yes. Because I... I said a couple of them aren't beautiful? Which ones? What about that woman? What's her name? well she said yes because I said a couple of them aren't beautiful which ones

um what about uh that woman what's her name Eileen Warnos the serial killer beautiful than me

he's reaching just misunderstood zip her a photo of Eileen Warnos if she's gorgeous I don't know what to tell you she's got a steez

to her I'll say she I don't know I can't wait to see what she looks like now. Yeah. Eileen, there she is.

You know what? You know what? She looks great. Oh my God. Imagine like a thriller played by Jodie Foster. Imagine how beautiful she'd look in a cockpit of an F-35. Oh my God. Or just talking about a big plane.

So you think that she's beautiful? I think all women can be beautiful the more they talk about aircraft. Because that's what I measure this by. You know women are better for flying fighter jets? Like they're better at flying fighter jets. Is it because they don't have as much blood? Do you think that is that why your dad's a pilot they have less blood I mean yeah

kind of I knew I was fucking right kind of they can survive better g-forces because they have wet bones they have a lower center of gravity and they have a cavity inside their body they're less likely to pass out when they hit high Gs in general. So women are better fighter pilots than men. Also, women are better at fucking ski shooting.

Really? The ski. You know that event? That event where they ski and then shoot guns? Women are better at that event. I'm doing a single rope halfway across the room There's no way they're beating me I do like the idea of thinking like being really good at Call of Duty and being like I could fuck up an Olympic

skeet shooter And then heaving on the first hill Some of those cod guys are probably are really good with shooting real guns you think so Definitely definitely talking about have you shot a gun no have you shot a gun you don't think The cod boys back fucking down under With that hit the ATV on weekends and the shooting rain on the other weekends. I'm saying what I was saying is that the

skill, I don't know if it transfers immediately. I think the collective body count of the top 500 Warzone players is over two digits. Are you talking about like human beings

killed? He means killed, not like the fun slang. Yeah. Dude, we were playing when I was playing competitive COD, one of the first people I matched into was a convict

It's John way gay who just got out of prison That's never happened in a game. Yeah, well that just because you serve time doesn't mean you killed somebody the likelihoods higher Can I admit something to you guys of course? I have a chode. Oh my god. Well. No we've seen your penis I know every time I used a mirror Oh my god. Well, no, we've seen your penis. I know. Every time I used a mirror. You used a mirror? I used a mirror to make it appear longer. Like Dane Blaine.

That's right. Oh my god. Damien Blaine, I used a mirror trick. Wow. Okay. And that just reminded me. You've just cut me, jarringly, to this ad read, but you're talking about your chode. I am. Because I wanted to say this because

I'm going to have to call every single person I know and tell the truth. Wow. Because they were also tricked by the mirrors? They were also tricked by the mirrors. And I have a lot of phone calls to make. And luckily I have Mint Mobile. You go to Bam Margera's guy? Yeah. For the mirrors? Yeah, same guy. Mint Mobile offers premium wireless for just $15 a month, especially if you need to get in contact with every person you've ever known and have a heart-to-heart with them about something in your life. You'd hate to pay for all those minutes. That's right, Slime.

This is an ad read. And Mint Mobile, they give you the best rate, whether you're buying for one or a family. I had to tell my family. You had to tell your family? what you had to tell your family what's left of them surely all the bruno cousins in chicago i had to i had to call them up and say wow hey i got something to tell you and it was good because the plan for my mobile came with unlimited talk and text high speed data because i need to find out you know and all your cousins were thrilled to hear that anthony's on the phone we haven't

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pop it's got a pop can opener. Right. On it. Okay, well that's the Mint Mobile ad read and back to the episode. All criminals should be allowed to vote again. I think we need him. For president.

I think also no women are criminals. Because this is... This is what happens when he's gone. It's gonna be like this every time. What? The funeral gets fucking... Goes up like a fucking party, dude? The funeral's not going up. We're fucking doing fucking i can hear them out there fucking partying dude dude

fucking uh popping bottles nelly's here the rapper migos are out there yeah well well come on now it was like a joint i didn't want to make the joke i had it too it was a group i don't want to beef with migos i'll say it yeah to be to be very clear I don't want to beef with Migos. I'll say it. Yeah, to be very clear, we don't want any beef with Migos. I do not want the smoke with Quavo. I just fucking don't. I'll be bold when I say that. Arrest me, officer. So you use...

You look like... Zipper, Google the Click Five. You look like a member of the Click Five. What is that? Do you look so funny? Yeah, you look like the profile picture on my youtube page when but like unironically Yeah, which is also you does he just look like five years younger right now for some reason He actually he wrote yellow submarine. No the only one that he wrote Wow. That's kind of fun The click five.

The older photo. Like the first photo. No, no, no. Go down. The blue one. The blue one. Yeah, you look like you're in this band. What is this band?

This is a boy band from the year 2000 probably. I don't know. Five? I've never heard of this in my damn life. She's bittersweet. She's waiting me off of my feet. Dude, I'm having fucking youtube depression i uploaded a video and it's doing bad and i feel it now it's wait what video do you upload it was just one about uh i what aiden went on the hitch podcast and i just talked about on

stream and just had to edit it's very simple it's not like the big fucking piece or whatever you uploaded the video of you talking about me on the Hitch podcast? Yeah. Like recently? Like today. That was from so long ago. I know it was from so long ago. You just missed the timing.

Did you failed off? Yeah, probably. But yeah, it's like, because I've never, I've never like, it's the worst one. It like turns to the metrics. I always said I would never be like a metric maxer or like a pilt guy interesting

YouTube is so good at just making it hurt dude they make it hurt they're like they're like your regular viewers aren't returning to watch this

dude they say yeah like hey hey and it's a YouTube thing and it's just everyone thinks you're fucking whack now everyone knows

you're high and thinks it's a problem we don't even think you should upload anymore. They're just like, maybe take a break from this shit. It just shows the logic number. So how many dirty dishes left in your sink?

It's like, you can see your nose at all times, you just ignore it. And you can feel your tongue in your mouth. He's like, YouTube, stop it! Look. Oh, Ludwig. You know how they made the final Dracula

flow recently? Is it the final one? It's the final one, which, I mean, kudos,

you know? Yeah, put a cap. Don't do Dracula flow 10, like, kudos to not

running the wheels off. Yeah, they found an ending. Dracula flow fans, some of the

most annoying fans on the planet. Yeah, I mean, it's tough when something's so fucking funny that, like's funny enough for like people who are cool and funny enough for people who suck to enjoy that's how you know it's really good that's how you know it's

really good and I was thinking about that because I was like the newest one is to me probably the funniest one really it's really good and I mean they're all funny but like I was like wow it's really really good 20 minutes long it's really long how can you say so funny good for 20 minutes dude that's sick they just know what they're doing it's kind of unbelievable but then you got then you see like the guy in public wearing the dracula flow t-shirt and he has like and he's got i don't know like fucking all over print fucking sweatpants with the reddit logo and you know it's funny because you you're not typically a hater at least in the way that i am about things uh but what you don't think i think he's pretty reasonable about hating you saved it with the second part baby you said because not like me

because you're just it's i think he's just as much of a hater as like a normal person and you're not normal because you just like everything and the social network's good i dislike things no you don't name one that's what i thought that's what i fucking thought dude so stop that's what i fucking thought so let me cook at ludwig's funeral for fucking once you look like you're in the zombies this is so hard so anyway i didn't like zodiac the movie go on so so you were like yeah because i remember you tweeted out like dracula flow tattoos still healing you're like talking about a specific type tweeted out like Dracula flow tattoos still healing. You're like talking about a specific type of zoomer that is annoying. And this this particular like force of culture, this video series has been a point of contention for you specifically.

Yeah. In being a hater. Yeah. And I think that's interesting. Yeah. I think the I forgot I said that, but it is the best way to put it in my head, which is Dracula flow tattoo still healing person is like they see a funny video and they don't even, they don't even care about the time for that thing to be culturally significant in their life or their friend group. It's hot right now. It's funny right now.

And they take their enjoyment to it to a level that can make it something that's a personality trait of theirs and they can be like i got a dracula flow tattoo and that's a tweet and look at my tattoo like like the people who i don't know i feel like when when if you were to go show that to the guys who made the thing they'd be like oh that's you know kind of now let me bring you this example. Anders, a Yard fan, did this with Aiden's face. Yes. Do you think that's the same mechanic? Yeah.

Okay. Of course it's the same mechanic, yeah. At the time, you were much more softer to that idea when I thought it was really gay. Anders, why don't you tattoo this? I think Anders is fine. I do think it's not a binary. I think it's a spectrum. I think that, like, if there's a show that has fucking seven fans and you do that it's kind of hard it's kind of fucking hilarious

to me i don't really care right um wait so if it has a lot of fans if it's like this cultural immediate phenomenon of like everyone's seen this video so can't we all just enjoy it and think it's funny and not have to get the all over does it come around the other side like if something's popular for long enough? Like if I get, you know, if I get a Bluey tattoo. I think so, yeah. No, Bluey's having a moment right now. I think time.

No, it's more than a moment. It's a $2 billion cartoon show. I think there's something about tattoo. Well, tattoo is like a specific example, but I think there's something about it that's like, you can you can see when someone has gotten a tattoo because they're thinking about the instagram post sure and i think that that is lame and i think that when you take like a meme something that is like

who knows if we'll be talking about dracula flow in 15 years what about like i don't know i roll up in a mario kart wii T-shirt. That's different. That's old shit as fuck. Because it's old. Because it's old. You're a real head. You're also a real head. Yeah.

But you can't be a real head of Dracula Flow within that time. Not anymore because it hasn't had the longevity. Unless there were old Dracula Flow tapes that you were put onto years ago. Then it kind of makes it, but then you're kind of like that contrarian guy of like, I knew about this shit before, but what I'm trying to get at is it. Okay.

Let's say you were, you're 20. Do you think you would, do you find yourself making the same mistake if you're 20 or like what you can, we consider like something kind of cringe. Like, isn't this endemic to just being a young not that

one no i think the new ones are bred differently how so because i think every moment is an opportunity to be viral for the new youth sure i think that it wasn't necessary i was on the brink of that i was in the precipice of that yeah but it wasn't quite the same like being a big internet creator was this distant fantasy that like isn't real to the average person i think the like the young people now like the high schoolers now like everything could make you viral and famous do you think tiktok specifically changes that yeah yeah i think tiktok is a big part of that i don't think it's all bad i think like i think that because of it they're also really funny because their their taste gets filtered at a rate so much faster than most

people that's true yeah and so they're all really funny and that's really cool to see like so much funny shit get posted all the time like i think dude i think that like there's like 17 year olds who can like banter circles around a lot of people that's cool but i think but those those kids they also think this is lame i think that the person i'm talking about like they also think this is lame so it's about sniffing out the idea of sincerity in a commitment to a bit or appreciating a cultural moment without making it something, like,

that's going overboard, I guess, is a nebulous way to put it. Yeah, it's, I don't know, it's like five minutes after the Dracula float drops, it's like, we're gonna do a Dracula-themed birthday party and I bought shirts and I have the shirt. You know what I will say to millennials do this. Millennials will like they'll have like like Queen's Gambit drops and like we're doing a Queen's Gambit themed birthday party.

Can I? And they're just as bad. Can I step in? I would love for you to step in to me. I could potentially throw a guest of ours under the bus. I took a dump in Topanga. I took a poop. Into that woman. That's all. Isn't that crazy?

Continue. How? How did I do it? I don't know. I transferred between our buttholes. I don't want to do this anymore. Like a train going in two tunnels. I think I'm too... I'm upset that that makes me laugh so much now. I don't have anything. I'm upset that that makes me laugh so much now. I don't have anything. I'm a husk of a human being. Well, that's what funerals are for. That's what funerals are for.

To get in touch with death. Okay, please. Do you remember Michelle Carre? Yeah, that's what I was... And the Marvel-themed Halloween party she was. Yeah, you did. We're famous. But what's wrong with that? Okay, it's also the epic let people enjoy things. Sure. It's the... Yeah, you did. We're famous. But what's wrong with that? Okay, it's also the

epic let people enjoy things. Sure. It's the... Well, hold on. I think that's the literal interpretation of what I'm saying. This is different than what Nick is saying.

Yeah. I don't think that's quite the same thing. I think that, you know, taking popular IP and doing a themed party around it, it's the same thing

as us making Smash Summit themed around something. I don't think that's different. I hate it having themes. Ken Chen. I gotta think on it longer. I can't find the perfect words, but there's something just about like

something like kind of just happening and there's something about like not being able to just enjoy it with your friends having to turn it into something that you can then make about you in this weird way. And like your person, you're making it your personality in this way that ultimately says,

now this is, I'm taking this thing that I know people give a shit about and we'll look at if I tweet about it and I'm making it about me. And look at me. I'm the guy who likes this thing a lot. And I'm like, shut up. I just like it. Just like the thing.

And not have to be that big of a deal. Sure. There's a way to say that that hits my point a little better but to me it annoys me it annoys me I mean I'm a hater I get it man

I just I was trying to figure out how the words to put it as well there's also no there's also no irony I don't know if that's part of it in the example

that you said imagine a young man a young man hosts his Dracula flow themed birthday party at college and everybody shows up

and everybody's into it and he makes a video and he posts it on tiktok and then he gets a hundred billion hundred thousand views hundred billion thousand views and then the comments are all like dude oh dude look at this dude dracula flow birthday he's on tiktok he's that crazy he did that and you know people are oohing and aahing at home yeah shouldn't those people don't they get to enjoy that thing like is it don't they have the right to enjoy that thing yeah everyone has the right to enjoy

it no matter how cringe you are but I think you're making fun of the guy who uploads it but if he doesn't upload it he's depriving them of the joy of oh don't oh behave depriving them of the joy i i think a better question here is are is that person validated by the amount of by the amount of happiness that is created by i think happiness is a measure of likes is also not a good measurement i do you know what this does remind me of when you guys

were talking about people like young people filtering their sense of comedy Way faster Is miles today on this hike We saw people panning for gold Throughout it which was kind of crazy There's just like guys there Who Who kind of look

This is a California thing People came here for In elementary school I I did this. Like, they took us to, like, a field trip, and we panned for gold. Like fucking prison workers? Kind of, yeah. They said cough it up. I never really thought about it, actually.

They said cough it up, dude. And we didn't get to keep what we mined. They have these big, you know, like, hammers, and they're flipping over and cracking rocks. That's awesome. And they have this, like, is it called a salute? Dude, we don't. I think we've done enough today. The hell, dude.

With the topics. I thought you were sex positive. A little much. They're searching for gold with their contraptions. And we got to the car and Don B was talking about it. He's like, dude, imagine imagine imagine being back in the day and and finding gold for the first time and you just have your dopamine receptors haven't been wrung out yet by by cs cases and loot boxes it's just pure dopamine for the first time in your like

28 year old life and that's a moment we'll never have Miles always does this shit I was thinking about the young people looking at Dracula Flow birthday TikToks they're just getting the dopamine from the rag

this is very similar to the great nut it's funny Miles will do this thing where you're like well we'll talk about a lot Like different stuff and so a lot of times we'll talk about like Humor among young people or whatever And uh and but he'll always Take it to this crazy place Where he'll be like yeah and then like

Do you think that some of them are just like empty inside And like until they die they'll never know happiness No Miles What the fuck are you talking about He's in this phase right now where he'll just go right to the end

of it true true oh yeah true we saw sorry go ahead we saw at the end of this hike

this hike was really far away it was called Bridge to Nowhere and we we get to the very end of it finally it took so many hours we hiked for six hours today and 12 miles.

How much water you bring? We brought two like gallon jugs of water. Oh, it's quite a lot. Went through all of it. And at the end of the trail, we're nearing the end, but it's been way further and harder to get there than we thought because there's keeps. We had to Ford a river over and

over and over again to do the hike and we didn't know that so we're soaked like from the waist down oh yeah we're so wet and like socks shoes destroyed like none of us knew this and there's ropes because the water gets so deep and the current's so heavy you have to hold the ropes to like get across the sections of the river each time you do it sounds fun if you're ready for it and it was kind of it was kind of dope even though it was it ended up being difficult and the trail is all fucked up it's really hard to find your way so we keep having to double back at one point one of the gold miners tells us that the trail is to the right up like by these power lines and we follow this for maybe 30 minutes and get to a dead end realize that he's just raw trolled us and have to turn all the way back

all the way back none of my gold was he about yay tall maybe a big green hat was he wearing overall with one of the straps laying against his stomach. Did it stay over here? Did it rhyme when he told you to go? It came with a riddle. And so we've come all the way back. It's taken so long to get to the top of the hike. And we think about, we've thought about turning around a bunch on the way. But we're surely, if we get to the end, we'll see this beautiful bridge. That the expectation is we'll be at that scene in Stand stand by me where the kids are like on the bridge with the train yeah like and it's

gonna link like these two canyons together that is loosely what we all have in mind and we get to the we get to because that's kind of what one of the pictures they're at the mirage part of this whole thing yeah and and we get around the corner to the top and we start seeing these signs that say no drones allowed this is no longer like la you had to turn it yeah you gotta go your friends can go i'm like i'm an emotionless husk and i feel no shame so i'll stay here i'll stay here now and i uh it's private property instead of the the park now and there's all these warning signs about how we're being surveilled, don't use drones,

and they repeat these signs over and over and over again. It feels very ominous. And you get over to the left and there's an outhouse there that's like locked up that you can't use. And then behind the outhouse, and you can see the beginning of the bridge

that is the end of the hike in the distance. Between the bridge and the outhouse is this giant set set of green like shipping containers that have clearly been turned into like some sort of like thing you can enter like there's doors and things on it called the format and where and and there's a bunch of warning signs and like a what looks like an electric fence around it no spawn and it's like absolutely like no trespassing warning about like how to prosecute you how to take advantage of you immediately we go to work on what's inside this and because this is this is private property and this could and the conclusion we came to is that this is the ultimate incel no fap man who who has set up his goon cave. This is the goon commander's headquarters.

He has set up his goon cave at the end of a 12 mile hike where, where in order to break his law of personal celibacy, he has to hike in Ford rivers to get to his setup, which is just pornography film monitors where he's allowed to be one time and he has to return home dude i can i can see miles instantly concocting lighting up to this dude he's just he has this penchant for like seeing something like this and being like there's a gooner in there and it almost made we finally it almost made what was the worst ending to any hike i've ever done worth it because we continued the next like 200 feet to the bridge and it's just the

lamest stone bridge you've ever seen wow and we cap up our hike of the bridge to nowhere with the worst view imaginable and then immediately begin hiking home. We didn't even stay. What was this hike called? Bridge to Nowhere. You're confused. You got lost. Get fucked. Get absolutely fucked.

Really? I can't say John Wayne poopy and I have to take that? Did you not think you were going to die? Miles came home shook. It was harrowing. It was because we kept getting lost because the trail was fucked up Did you not think you were gonna die miles miles came home sure it was harrowing it was Getting lost because the trail was fucked up and also we encountered the bridge is going nowhere

Encountered a large very loud rattlesnake no shit. Yeah, you saw it. Yeah, that's cool I fucked with it. You should have fought with it It was it was the first time I've seen a snake like a rattlesnake make noise other than it's a rattle You should it was very oh my god. Yeah, dude. That's fucked up. I don't know I think we didn't see it at first and it wasn't on the trail So I've seen a few before hiking but they'll be on the trail and you just you just give it its face That's scary. Yeah, that would scare the fuck fuck with you. You don't fuck with him This is my bag baby this guy Dude, that's scary. Yeah, that would scare the fuck out of me. He doesn't want to fuck with you. You don't want to fuck with him. He kind of wants to fuck with you. He wants to fuck with you.

He wants to fuck with you. This is my bag, baby. This guy, like if we're walking past this and my leg's right here, he was hiding in a bush. So we stepped next to the bush and there's this loud, like fucking hiss, shake sound

from the bush. And we all like... I know we had them little guys. Yeah, we got a fucking ton of them. I've never seen one. Have you guys seen TikTok Riz Party? No, what is this? Could you, Zipper, could you look up TikTok Riz Party original?

This was on the subject of kids being funny. And not kids, I guess, like the Gen Z-er generation. But there's this TikTok that came out of, like... And it kind of sucks because there's like this corporate angle to it but it's basically this like prom or like homecoming party which with a bunch of high schoolers and they're all like doing the same they're all like singing the same song together i forget what it's called uh tiktok riz party try the the top left one tiktok riz party try the the top left one

okay so what happened this came out it'd be someone like you might be rolling your eyes because this is like two weeks old or like maybe three weeks old so you like think it's cringe but like so what happened was everyone started lore dumping about this fucking video and that guy so there's a guy in the back and they call them turkish quandale dingle and they started like like breaking down like these made-up ideas of like why turkish quandale dingle and group leader who's wearing the blue tie didn't get along but then also second in command which is white shirt he's got a big relationship with group leader and but there's actually a lot of tension at the forefront and there's a ton of these like these tiktoks just breaking down this insane made-up story they're gonna be all right and that's what i'm saying

they're gonna be all right i saw this shit and i'm like you know what this is good they're having fun things that just will never get old is lying on the internet. Dude. It's timeless. It really is. I do it. It's so fun. And the viewers, they still get mad.

And I go, ah. That's what they have instead of the Sopranos. It is kind of their Sopranos. Yeah. Turkish Kwandale Dingle is their Christopher Moltisante. Yeah. And I think that's the first sentence, first time I've said that.

None of the Gen Z or Alpha people who saw that said that. No, but when they get older, much like Animaniacs, it'll contextualize the world for them later on. And that'll be really nice. You know, I'm starting to feel like I miss Dubbin. You're starting to feel like you miss him? Yeah, I think I miss him.

You miss his fucking tiny little ass meat. He had great meat, man. He had great meat. Don't spread lies about him. Post-humorous. Post-homeless. Post-humorous? Well, show me a picture.

I don't have one. Well, some of us saw it with our own damn tooth. No pick, no proof. No pick, no proof. Sorry to everyone at the funeral. There was no picture of his penis, so I guess we'll all have to believe it was tiny. Blood was micro. That's why he died. That's why was micro. That's why he died.

That's why he died. That's why he died. Because he needed, he was in a saw trap where he had to put his penis in the side of some contraption that would free him. Someone called his mom a micro center. He had to, no, it was a saw trap, and he had to get an erection to hit a button inside of a hole. Like Jack Black.

Like Jack Black. Couldn't pop it. And he had to put it in there. But his penis was micro. And he got as hard as he could. He thought about all kinds of boobs and pussies. And Jigsaw was like, I see the game is a bit unfair. I did not know this part when I made the game for you. I'm kind of doing a Bane.

He's more like a the low blood weight. Sometimes you're not very fair to your friends. Sometimes you're short with your friends. I'll show you how short you can get. He has to jelk. He has to jelk to make it longer, but a very painful jelk. Both of us.

He's got to put it in like a candy cane maker. Like a pasta stretcher. A little thing. And he's like, it's micro. I can't do it, Jigsaw. He's like, dude, I didn't know it was that small. I think he would be confident. He would have been confident because he has foreskin and it stretches far.

That is true. That's an advantage you guys have. Yeah. And if you pinch it like this, when the air comes out, it goes. I'm not kidding. Seven times. Yeah, I know. It still makes me laugh.

It was right after he got engaged. Right? Yeah, he got engaged to Cutie Cinderella and then got put in the penis saw trap. What's she? What do you think put him in? I got a couple of damn guesses. She wasn't ready. She's like, you know what?

There's only one way out. Warm in tradition. That's only one way out. Warm in tradition. And that's how he went out. And it's funny because Jigsaw was like, damn, that one was kind of unfair. Because most of them are fair. Yeah. But he's like, this one, I did not expect it to be that. French Jigsaw.

I didn't think it would look like a kernel of corn. If you will. This is it, guys. You kind of push the edge of the head up. And this is when he's excited. Whee! It waves. It goes, hi, guys.

You know when you guys can do that? When they have kind of the half chub thing or when you're full chub? I think our penis in general, we can kegel it, right? Yeah, yeah. And you can make it Yeah Yeah, and when your penis gets hard yeah with foreskin on it right where does the foreskin go where does it go well slime? Early in your life the foreskin is actually attached to the head somewhat and over the course of cleaning

You're a young it's like the water bottle before you break it indeed when you're a young person the course of cleaning it while you're a young it's like the water bottle before you break it indeed when you're a young person you have to pull your foreskin back and as you get older and your penis gets larger the foreskin slowly detaches from the head is this for real so that when you become so that when you become erect as an adult the skin slides all the way back and no longer covers the head so wait when you have a erect circum unccumcised penis, your head of your penis is exposed in pink. Slime, if I'm rock hard. Yeah, if you're rock hard, it's exposed in pink. If I've got a stone in my pants. You're stone, you're rock.

Then you better believe it doesn't cover it anymore. And I don't have to do anything. You're rocked up, Johnson. You're Johnson's rocked up. Are you fucking with me? No. Do you think if you had a smaller penis, it would be covered by the foreskin? If you had an abundance of foreskin and a micro penis like Ludwig- Yeah, I think the foreskin would scale with your penis size.

No matter- no matter- presumably, no matter how hard you get, it wouldn't move the skin back for you. Dude, it's so tough to roll- to roll extra foreskin with small penis. And that- and that- and that might have been- No one wants that. It's like in- it's like Mario Mario Kart You got like big car Small wheels This is fucking Dude I got no Excel Nobody expects it

Nobody expects it Jake Saw didn't expect it Oh what the Oh fuck I could tie a bow With that I could do a I don't know

It's like a shoelace Ludwig Ludwig is so weird dude Well I just miss him so much I mean, this concludes our time with Ludwig. Are we at the end?

We're at the end. It'll never... Zipper, for those who don't know, he showed up dressed up, too. It was very cute. It was very cute. Zipper did show up dressed up. He's got a little tie

hanging from the zipper hole. Well, Ludwig, hey. I'm gonna miss you forever, buddy. I'm sorry that you couldn't be here for the final episode because this is the last episode. Unless, of course, you guys want us to keep going. If you want us to

keep going, just keep that sub going. Maybe he'll be back in the Patreon episode. It'd be kind of crazy. Oh my god, what if? What if we'll try some spells? So if you want to go to the Patreon episode, we're going to do a whole other hour without Lubbin. All necromancers, please report to the Patreon episode. We're going do a whole other hour without Lubbin. All necromancers.

Please report to the Patreon episode. We're gonna need you to clock in. We need you to clock in and wear your hood and your robes and open the book of the damned because we are in trouble. And I couldn't find long socks, so that's why. So goodbye, everybody.

Goodbye, everyone. Leave your favorite moment about Ludwig down in the comments if you made it this far I'm sure you'd appreciate it from hell if you know any additional details

about his death because we don't actually know I would love some clarity because it's so ambiguous to me I think it was the boner thing

personally the taser one or the saw trap the taser one there was two boner things yeah yeah yeah my vote's for Cessna

alright we'll see you in the primo okay bye