The Yard - Ep. 177 - Aiden Got Botox..

Episode Date: December 4, 2024

This week, the boys talk about slime's thanksgiving surgery, playing League of Legends together, and how Aiden got Botox... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

["French Piano Sonata No. 1 in C major, Op. 4 in C minor, Op. 4 in C minor, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, Op. 4 in C major, you were there? No, I did. There's like those three minute videos. Why you should play Karthus jungle? Yeah. Yeah. And I watched all those damage. You know what? Squishy and Laker. You don't remember any of it.

Well, I made a chart so I don't need to remember it. It's a matchup chart. I didn't like watch it and I was like, I will remember this. I made a chart of like, how do they do against fiddlesticks based off this info Yeah when I when I go into a matchup and I Watch that before the game starts and I'll be like alright, and then I'll forget it means nothing Yeah, yeah watching before a game starts is like watching how to score touchdown before a football game. It's like

The opposite for me it helps a lot. No, I think it's helpful. I don't I don't retain it It all I mean all it does is I play a mage that's probably different for both you, but it just helps me at what range I'm going to play. Sure. Sure. Yeah. You can have some reference points from the video, but like knowing, you know, what summoner spell. I like knowing like, you know, oh, that thing's glowing. That means it's more damage right now. Right.

But I made it. I made a little gref. Little gref. That's right. The thing is, you guys never dealt with Gragas top. And one day you might. Hey, get this. Have. You have. You know what I'm saying. Yeah.

He's a problem. I'm just saying like. Well, we just started. Can't talk about it. Yeah, we have no league talk. What's our like, we're banishing it? How long do we have to spend talking about other stuff where we can like maybe slip something in?

It's like 30 minutes. I think we get to like the hour mark and then we can just 21 right now. Well, let me start off the podcast by saying your pants make me look like you I can see your monkey Yeah, don't bring him a monkey Did you I talked my monk Did you? I tucked my monk! Did you? I knew that was your monk.

Hold on, you went to France, so you went- That monk fruit of yours. The monk's been tucked. You went a full week in France. Sorry, what was that? I can't- He's doing the Sycuna laugh. I stole his joke.

So if I laugh- I stole his joke. If I laugh, if you guys know how to gum graft, they take the tissue from the roof of your mouth, they put it on your gums, they sew it onto your gums. Oh my god. What?

Sounds like a saw trap. Yeah. Dude, and get- Like a small What? Sounds like a saw trap. Yeah. Dude and get- Like a small needle? Also like a saw trap. You're awake and the guy is Armenian. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Hey, what is that? I didn't see the in coming. I thought that the guys are mean. Yeah, I also thought he was mean. Yeah. No, his doctor and his name ends in Y-A-N. And it's... It's just Yan.

He's great. He was like... Dude, he was like a perfectionist. You could tell this guy is so into periodontal surgery. It's like his League of Legends. Yeah. Or his Super Smash Brothers Melee. That's good.

It is. That's good. Dude, he was working on me like a fucking scientist. Yeah. He was like... Like a doctor. Like he studied it very hard. A man of medicine.

It is different because he would explain what he was doing. He wore the bird mask. And he wore the bird mask and there were flowers in it so he didn't smell the toxins. Because you don't want to. And then he would say, okay, in this part, I have to concentrate very hard.

So if you're hurting right now, do not let me know. And if it is, it'll be over soon. Slime to chat when he's toppling against Kragas. It's not easy. That's beast. You got to hear that sometimes. I was so happy. I'm going to squirm. I got to let this guy know he's hurting me sometimes. Dude, it was so you're just getting snipped and fucking cut and sewed. And then I get home. Actually, Zippor, you have the the pictures I sent you. Dude.

So over the next couple of days, your face just swells up like crazy. It is insane. Like a damn balloon. It's damaged to your face. It's a bit swollen right now, no? It's a little swollen still. It hurts really bad. My gums are swollen, but it's gone down.

That's risky. Why? Because if it's not swollen, then you're just like, hey. I can just tell it's swollen because he's like, he had to look like that. Dude, they should draw that into a low. Someone give me a lowjack of that. I look like Donkey Kong from the side. You look like E-Rob.

I kind of do. Look up, you know, E-Rob troll video. Dude, I was just going to say. I was saying I look like the the Shiba that is. Squall and Shiba. Dude, I was literally about to say you look like a dog ate a bumblebee. What's it? What's E-Rob?

Look at that. Zipper, pull up E-Rob troll video. It'll come up first. I was streaming because I was like well nothing's gonna keep me away from the game that I love and I was looking in the Player cam and I had my face all fucking swollen. I was like I kind of do look like him right now. E-Rob? Yeah. Okay well Yeah, like just his default state. Yeah. Well it's just his eyes. Zipper when you're done with that. So why I do this I-Kunna is because when I you guys make me laugh and my face stretches my lip stretches it stretches where the stitches are and it hurts. Oh I have to like

I'm pulling back. Maybe we do the first episode of the yard that just isn't funny. We protect the slime. It's just about making me laugh. There's a lot of shit I don't think is funny. You guys could sing a bunch. I don't know. We like the singing portion. Yeah I don't though. I would just be mad go ahead sing No, you've been more irritable. I think I miss you is it cuz the pain look you in the eyes Do you like that my god, that's kind of nice he's kind of hit he does Know he has it sometimes There it is Don't want to be on my computer ever.

This is insane. I think Corona. This is a terrible angle. This is if you're eating out as monkey. The funniest part is because when he- Chill on him. He's by himself. In that video, he's like, and then we're talking about the COVID, and then they move to that angle and he goes, don't do that angle, they're not gonna take me seriously. That's so fucking funny. Wait, Zippor, can you pull up the picture I sent? to that angle and he's and then he goes don't do that angle they're not gonna take me seriously that's so fucking funny

can you pull up the picture I sent? what'd you got in? that was my Thanksgiving I got that the day before Thanksgiving what a horrible day to get it yeah I don't know why he scheduled it that day he was really trying to fuck up I guess he was Armenian you know he don't celebrate why were there bugs in your forehead? And I got I had bugs in my face. We both had face problems this weekend.

You look like you're about to grow horns. Yeah, your girlfriend sent me a picture. She said you got Botox. Funny. She just lied. Did you? Dude, I did. What? Yeah. D? I thought it was funny. Isn't that weird? Wait, so you have both?

I can't like look look. I'm trying to move my forehead up Why did you get Botox? It's free Wait this is awesome Yeah, she was it look different. Oh, so were you was your girlfriend getting Botox? Well, how do you end up at the Botox place? Yeah, there's a BOGO. Yeah Botox in Maryland, they have free streets had Botox You're in Maryland and I was in Maryland for Thanksgiving and you're getting BOGO Botox rolled up and they sell fruit at the stand

And then they do Botox and you're there Joe Biden's there. He's got me Joe Botox. But Joe Joe Bob free He's the one who told him to pardon Hunter. I was like, well, me and Joe were getting the toxin. Yeah, I was like, I think you just go for it. Oh, yeah, why not? I think that you have to give Joe so much of it. This we go high, they go low strategy just isn't working out anymore. Just both go low.

And he's and he's got fucking bugs in his forehead like me. You know what I say is that no meat that big should be caged. What did that? Hunter's meat. Hunter's pizza. I thought you were talking about Joe Biden's cock. You can't cage that meat. He probably has big meat where he didn't got it.

Trump gets into office day one. He was caging that meat. He was making sure the meat stayed caged forever. We should have pardoned him on that alone. Dude, it's like putting a pot roast in like a little tiny hamster cage and never letting it out. That's what the Hunter Biden in prison is like. It'll start to stink in there. A tenderloin.

What's the bugs? The bugs? Oh, so the real bugs. Yeah, they put the bugs in. The deadass thought this man had bugs in his forehead and then got them removed and then he was there and then he was like, also, both of us, the bugs in and then they poop out the books. I thought he had bugs in there. Yeah. Did you know also the Ninja Turtles are real?

OK, first off, don't do that. Don't do that. You sound like because don't hurt me because they are real. Smart one. Yes. And he's lame. Yes. First off, he he would have bugs of any of us. Because he had scabies. Sorry.

What was it? Shingles. Famously. Famously caused by bugs. That's not even why. It's because he's a nasty man. I'm a nasty man and I want to shoot a dog. That's you.

That's me. So I'm the nasty man who wants to shoot a dog. You know you're the nasty. So I'm the nasty man who wants to show you the nasty man. I'm the nastiest man of us? I'm the nastiest man! Yes! Are we being for real? Slime is the least nasty. That's a lie.

I appreciate it OG. What qualifies as nasty for you? Can I go through my nasty boy tier list? I like how Mirasta is not even in this. Let me go through a nasty boy to your list. Least nasty. Let's go, dude. I'm the second least nasty. I'm the third nastiest.

I think you're the third nastiest. And then you're the nasty. You mean clean or nasty? I mean, now my how am I? What is the competition? Where's this guy? I you are being really difficult. Why am I? What type of is it like a good nasty? Mean now Is it like a good nasty it's no it's like like you you gross yeah

Now I'm offended highly unpleasant Well fucking serious I clean nausea I didn't do a nine second fart earlier everyone everyone talked over to pretend it wasn't happening. Yeah, you're the second assiest, but you're the nastiest because you shower here. I shower here sometimes. And why would that be nasty? There was a cockroach in there. Yeah, but that's just-

You shower with the roaches, they're nice. I don't know, you've never had a bug in your shower at home? You just throw it out. You fucking kill it, you get rid of it Cockroach dead rat guys that ass you throw it out is funny. I'm the cockroach dead. I'm God forbid I clean this place out Charlie. Would you share a toothbrush with someone? No, I've done that really I mean I've had there has been a situation where I've had to you'll try Botox But you won't try sharing a toothbrush. someone? I have shared a toothbrush before.

It was bad. I did not like it. What was bad about it? What? I didn't like the way I imagined. It just felt gross. What if it was someone beautiful? It was. It was my girlfriend. And I and I it was gross. That was a layup.

No points given. And now you're listening. He's on point. He's like two faced trying to put his skin back on. Real shit, my girlfriend gets Botox and she gets it for free because her mom, that's her job. She administers Botox and other treatments. So I went to the clinic with my girlfriend and her mom and she she went to go get like hair lasered off and like Botox. And she has been saying like, I should get Botox. I should try it.

And then just to know what I would be insulted. This is my. My girl comes up to me and says, you should you look like. Yeah, she said I look like she's. And she said, she said, if if if we're to stay together. Yeah. And and bear child, I have to get I have to straighten out this morning. You have to remove the grooves and because Darwinism, then your kids

said kids won't have four. Because before she had four, she put you on a record player. You'd make a noise. And now it's all smooth. Can I ask something that might be a bit of an overstep? Sure. Is your girlfriend's mom beautiful? And they're still like a thing. Yeah.

Eric. Okay. God bless. Happily. Isn't that even isn't that name even mean beautiful? Happily in some ways. I think she's happy. Great.

You know, that's great with. She wouldn't be for. And if she's ever happy for her, if she's happy. Great. You know, that's great with she wouldn't be for. And if she's ever happy for her, if she's ever not happy, if she wasn't happy, what would you want? If she wasn't happy, I want her to be happy. I don't want to be a part of that. I guess. Right. Can I say it?

The last one you shouldn't have said in some cosmic way. Yeah. Okay. There we go. She listens to the show. Maybe through prayer. You don't even know. It's just because it's a mother.

Why? Why this woman? Yeah, okay, there we go. She listens to the show. Maybe through prayer. You don't even know, is it just because it's a mother? Why this woman? Because his girlfriend is beautiful, so his mom might be beautiful. Her mom might be beautiful. Okay. That's the weird reason. Why? What?

Isn't it? I don't think the gum guy's being weird. That's a weird... If you met my girlfriend and you were like, wow, nice girlfriend, what's the mom like? I think I would feel strange. I think I've asked this. He definitely has. What's her mom like?

It's like, now let's see the mother. And now I'm worried if you don't ask me what the mom's like. And that's what you should be worried about. Because that's exactly it. If I'm not asking... Because he doesn't ask. Because I've asked,, because I've asked to do it, I think you would be like famously were safe on my end. Would you be brought up her sisters?

Would you be brought up her sisters? I was like, oh, I don't like that. I don't like that. I turned to the swollen side of his face with a smile. To the swan side, I'm sure you send a picture of my good side I'm getting punished The swan side is the goon commander and the other side is slime

You can't control that side of that man What about your sister? Are your sisters coming? You wanna know how to get these scars? Why do I get these scars? It's just surgery Well the goon commander gets curious. Oh!

Yeah, it sucks, man. I know it sucks. So we're just two guys who had necessary facial surgeries. But what Botox, like, what did it fix for you? What were you, like, addressing with it? It doesn't actually fix anything. Yeah, my teeth are gonna fall out. The only thing it does is you it you get like these little injections in your forehead and then it makes botox anywhere.

So like what yours was just for wrinkles in your forehead? Yeah, I guess so. Because she was like, you should do the forehead. Yeah. Oh, cool. Random spot. I mean, she told you, right? She was like, yeah, you got it because she knows, right? That's where she gets it. She gets it in her forehead. And she was like, you, right? She was like, yeah, you got because she knows, right? That's where she gets it.

She gets it in her forehead. And she was like, you went in and she was and I was and I was like, and I don't like I don't feel like I need to do this. And then she was like, you have a podcast. Oh, my God. So the story pressure. And then and then I was like, you're right. You should. And I could I could be like Jeff Wittek.

Well, you're David Dobrik. So we're all going under with this here. Oh yeah! After you seriously injure me. I'll hurt you. Dude, he's gonna get addicted to that crap, and he's gonna start getting it all over. Botox, you do get addicted. Show me the guy whose arms look like Popeye.

Look up plastic surgery biggest arm in the world. You're gonna look like Barry Manilow. After this, a zipper will look up Barry Manilow. And it's weird. And after this zipper will feel very sleepy. We're going to have to put a big, a big like clothes pin on the back of Aiden's head to like pull all the skin back. Oh my God. That would be so good.

Yeah, I kept like, I felt like I just had a baseball in my head. That's what so good. Yeah, I kept like I felt like I just had a baseball. That's why I want that. Those are Jesus. I should wait. He's beautiful. I know he's breathtaking. Dude, he looks like when SpongeBob gets the muscle arms. Yeah, that is he walks around.

Yeah. Wasn't in Brian Silver. They're even different colors like they are for SpongeBob. Yeah, they're right. I'm down with that. Dennis, they might have seen this in made SpongeBob after yeah Barry Manilow. It's great. Oh look at that second picture He looks worse

That's what you're gonna look like. Yeah, do you think he would look better if he didn't have it done? Yes, obviously kind of like a puppet. Thank you. It's weird. He's looking. I don't know if he would look better Look at look at that one. Yeah, the last people just look bad Okay, I would like to play a game That's up on the menu for you you're getting on finesse ride you're taking fucking Botox Everyone says we're LA pills for thinking a dog sitting in a coffee shop quietly is a bad thing You're getting fucking Botox thing you're getting fucking Botox you freak. He's getting fucking Botox.

We're the LA socialites. I'm gonna get a dog and put it in a bag and carry it around. Put it in a bag and fucking give it Botox. Give me Botox. Give me my- If he's a vegan- Giving Botox to my Pomeranian because he's getting some fucking rain. He needs a pit bull fight.

Dude what would it look like? You gave it dog Botox. It'd look beautiful. That's awesome. Or like an armadillo. I want to give an armadillo. Oh my god, it's real. Oh my fucking god. No, that's bad.

That's bad for, it's probably medically necessary. Because occasionally it's medically necessary. Yeah, Botox can be like a medical thing too. Yeah, I guess so. Uh, it's for like, who's that dog with the droopy face? The bastard? Yeah, just lift it up. Just lift those cheeks up. I want to get Botox on my penile floor.

What is that? It's when you when you clench. Uh-huh. You're oh, you're what's it called? Call it Kegel muscle. Kegel muscle. Is that just your gooch? Wait, so you can't flex it like that anymore?

Yeah, I don't know. I think it'd be crazy. OK, you would never be able to get hard. Oh, it's not never it goes away How strong can you get your kegel muscle? Very so strong. I think you'd live like 10 Ten pounds. Yeah. Oh my god. Oh shit. That's heavy. You think you got the kegel to move? No, not me. Not me. Oh my god. Maybe I don't have to I looked up a thing a long time ago So at my old job, I was just like practice it sitting down. I

Don't like that. You're making the noise while telling this. It's so funny. You're practicing. I practice. You never practice. Yeah. You like do reps. Like you're lifting a weight. You practice? I practiced. Basically it's a way to stop yourself from busting too early. That's what they said. Oh, I didn't notice. I was having that problem. Okay. And so I was like, how do I fix this? And they say say work out

And I say yes chef. Yeah, we go to the gym But the gym is your penile floor. You could believe in God God makes me bust. God makes me bust quick. You could you could become an atheist Cuz you're thinking about how you don't believe in them you still Because you're thinking about how you don't believe in them you're still passing Damn you damn you know oh, I want to give you more Botox. I want to fill it with it I already want you to have more. I don't think I want you need it. Okay? I'm gonna love it with you. It feels weird. You need it. Oh, yeah, when you touch it does it feel No, it doesn't it when I touch it. It feels pretty much normal if I flew across this room with my friend

I try to move my like fucking brow up. It feels weird. Let me tell you this. I get like angry at me Okay, get like surprise It was so hot Comments below do you think Aiden is hotter now with Botox and surgery or do you think you don't need all that? You don't need all that makeup. You don't need all that video games. You don't need it. Let me ask you some. If I fly across the hall back for two seconds, press forward.

High kick like Liu Kang. My print hits the top of your forehead. Do you feel it? Is it numb? I'm feeling it. I like that. OK, I didn't load up. I wrote controversial theory. I don't even think all that Botox makes you ugly when you're older.

Who the fuck are you? Who is this for? I don't think it does. I think the reality is most plastic. Like plastic surgery like that. I think she's so beautiful. They're so beautiful. Whoever is going to be so beautiful. Way more people have it than people think because most of the time it's not that noticeable.

Yeah. Yeah. And I think like the really bad cases you see see but also we don't talk about is when people get old Sometimes it be getting a little ugly It's what you think so it is what it is I I am so glad She got nose jobs are different nose jobs are different. Oh My god, Simon Cowell looks like a muppet now. He looks insane Oh, she got some nose jobs are different. Nose jobs are different. Oh, my God.

Simon Cowell looks like a muppet now. He looks insane. Dude, he actually does. His eyes. He has the eyes. Look, I think he looks weird, right? Sometimes you look uncanny. But on the left, he doesn't look great. I'm not looking at the left.

I think that's like your uncle and he's funny as hell and a good guy. He's fine. But that's fine. So you're basically saying he just looks like a regular person and his personality shines through. Yeah. Right. He just looks like a scary. Well, they're also this is a bad side. They're choosing the worst.

Yeah. The weekend one is it's not real for one. That's from a yeah, that's from a music video. Go go go up to the time. We can never got it. He's all natural. OK. And what's going on? We can never what's going on? We can never. What's going on with his eyes?

Because I feel like he they got like a lift. So you see more. Is it just a light? They're more white. Maybe the editing is because it's just it's just. It's for sure. Edited brother. No, but his eyes on the left.

We look like they have more blood. Check it out. Look. Right, like you can't. No, no, no. I think you get eye whitening surgery. What do I think you could? Look, Right. Like you can't. No, no, no. I think you can get eye whitening surgery. What do I think you could? Wait and look, bro. Don't fucking get it.

Yeah, you put some crest strips. Look at all the blood vessels. You're like red. That has look up eye whitening surgery. You just wait. He looks like a ventriloquist dummy. Well, he is probably as veneers. Jeff Donnelly crazy with that boy. Dude. He would make him so racist

He'd make him a fucking terrorist make him a birth to a crisp guy from the Middle East He looks like he's gonna kick Gordon out of his browns. He'd make him brexit terrorist. Oh, that's epic That'd be a good no, you know, he would make him a crying liberal. Yo Does Jeff Dunham have new characters? I don't know. We got to see. So on an awkward. Oh, I think awkward is out. Dude, I can't be pulled off in 2020.

Loki, he might be back. Wait, Loki, awkward and rivals to. Oh, it's real. Three thousand to five dollars per eye. And I really bright one like Gwen. It has a high risk of serious complications. Wait, can you do like a Sharingan surgery? Yeah, you can permanently change the color of your eyes, but I think it's really risky.

Would you get the Renegade or the Sharingan? Dude, would you get the Renegade? One time, one guy explained to me Death Note and he said it's so funny. He was like, I was like, what's going on? Because he's watching like episode six. Like, so basically he's given him these cool eyeballs that allow him to see. He gave him the Shinigami eyes and then the Shinigami eyes. You can't tell that he has the Shinigami eyes.

He can see the Shinigami. He can see the time. You can see the time. You explained it so well. I watched all of Death Note that Christmas. But you know what? You have to give up. You explained it so well, I watched all of Death Note that Christmas. But you know what you have to give up? Uh, half your life. Yeah, I remember.

I retained it. This is nothing like a 3 minute league video. There's a Sharagami on it. He likes apples. But then El figured it out. Wait a minute, spoiler. You're saying it's home, but it's a great show. I'm making fun of it. Death Note is fucking awesome.

I prefer the live action. No, no one does. Did you actually watch it? What about the old live action movie? That's what I was talking about. The live action movie. Compared to the new shit? It's a lot different. They go to the Ferris wheel I think.

Liberal Death Note. When he writes their name they get cancelled There's a shirogami eyeball. Dude, the Shirogami. It's Shinigami. Is it Shinigami or Shidigami? Shidigami. Shidigami. This is Prezzo just next to every tweet. The guy who speaks Japanese next to me. Guys, no, I will.

First off, I'm 31 days since my last Duolingo. Jesus. I'm two months since my last lesson. What happened? I went to Japan. What's your sex traffickers coach doing? He's still there. I'm paying. I have to stop paying. He's still trafficking. I went to Japan and the week before I's still there, I'm paying, I have to stop paying.

He's still trafficking. I went to Japan, and the week before I went to Japan I was like, I don't need this. I'll just learn in Japan. You should ask him. And then I went and then I came back and I haven't picked it up again. I had a dream last night where I met Sushi Ramen. What? The YouTuber.

That's two foods. I thought you were just being super racist. Dude, pizza french fries guys? His name is Sushi Ramen. I'm just calling you that burger sandwich. I'm just calling you that burger sandwich. I don't just call random Japanese people Sushi Ramen. His YouTube name is Sushi Ramen. You're looking at it while yelling at me.

This is unbelievable. This is my main Japanese channel. Oh really? Can I just be crazy for a second? Wait what's his American channel called? Sushi Ramen. he speak Japanese? Is he Japanese? He's Japanese. Okay, that's fine.

Can I be a little critical of a guy I've never met for the first time in my life? Not very creative. The name? His videos are really creative. Okay. You'd love his videos. Okay. He does, he does really cool shit.

But anyway, I had a dream where we were hanging out and I was trying to play League with him. And I, well I couldn't say say do you want to play league? In Japanese, I was like game day League of Legends of Yeah, and then and then he was he kind of got it but then I couldn't calm in game Right mid. Yeah Thank you Mid. Mid. Top. Genki desu. Genki desu please. Genki desu. I'm dying lane. The beauty of Riot Games League of Legends is that you don't need to communicate. You can just use pings. But I wanted to because we were in a room together. He was next to me.

What kind of room? It was like my basement and what growing up. So was it dark? It was very, it was like Dungy. Was it just you two there? Mrs. B's basement was fucking tight. Mrs. who? Mrs. B.

Mrs. B's basement was set. I didn't even go in your basement. Huh? I didn't get these. I know, but he had a basement in the house. It was just like a regular basement. Oh, is that not your house you grew up in? No, it was.

But I'm saying it was like a basement with like an un- it was unfinished. It looked gross. Mrs. B's basement was like finger blast like world. I don't know if anyone's ever finger blasted there. Really? Finger blasted. I'm not one soul.

I never. Was blasting? It would be Christian. It would be dope. It would be Christian. Finger blast world. What did you say? I think it would be a cool-

Christian, you hear it? Don't yell. You finger blasted that damn basement, boy! You ever blasted that house? Oh, it's his house. He can't hear me. Mrs. B. I don't matter. I finger-blasted damn basement boy! You ever blast in that house? Oh, it's his house. He can't hear me. Mrs. B. I don't matter.

I put that together too. Mrs. B's son is Christian. Oh, I didn't know that. I put that together just now. I just didn't say anything. Really? Yeah. Oh.

Yeah, he's B. He's Young B. That's so cute. Young B? He's Young B. Do you have one on Mrs. B's house? You know when we're on the plane together, and you do the Peter Griffin penis thing,

and you pass your phone over? I feel like I did that almost on accident to the poor woman sitting next to me. With whose penis, young man? With Tony Soprano's penis. Oh. Tony Soprano's penis? Does he show his penis?

I'm two seasons in, and there isn't that much nudity and the sex scenes are usually aren't that explicit. With his gumar. And this girl who I assume is like a college student goes to USC flying back from Baltimore to LA is sitting next to me and she's been asleep the whole time. And I'm like, this is just a long flight and I'm really uncomfortable. So I keep moving and I have been like,

I have my phone down on the like table and I'm watching the Sopranos like this because I don't wanna like crane my neck. I don't wanna crane my neck down. So I'm watching the show like this. And she starts to like wake up right as it cuts to Tony in an office, just fucking a prostitute. And it's like the most graphic sex scene that I've seen in all of Sopranos.

And it's and it just keeps going. You're in season two. It's like it's like maybe 30 seconds long of him railing somebody. You're in season two. Yeah, I just finished. Was it a prostitute or was this Goumar? It was because we don't say that. She will say that. My bad.

It was she worked in the office, the waste management office that he briefly says is Goumar. That's not a prostitute. Is it a Goumar? I think she's not a prostitute. There's no culture in you. You go to Sweden and you forgive me. You're not Italian.

Shut up. Yeah, you're not Italian. I'm more Italian than you, you who you are. You're not Italian. Shut up. I'm 30%?! I'm more Italian than you, you cocksucker. Neither of us are Italian. I'll go down on my hill with you. I'm 30%. Two people who are not Italian, who do not know how to play top lane. Right here. You're a jungler, I'm a jungler. Not Italian, fine. But can't play top? I'm a jungler.

I can play top just fine. In season 2, Richie April and Janice have sex and he points a gun at her head. I can't play top. I'm a jungler. You're a jungler? I can play top just fine. I'm a jungler. In season two, Richie Apriel and Janis have sex and he points a gun at her head and I was wondering if it was that scene. It was not that scene, but that is an insane scene. It also, jaw drop, jaw drop when Janis shoot him. And oh. Spoilers.

20 year old spoilers. I haven't got to that YouTube short yet. I just got to the one where he was like, so tell me he's getting his dick sucked by the security guard. And then the guy goes, no, he was sucking the security guard's dick. And then they all freaked out. And I don't know who the guy is, but I just know that happened. Yeah.

And you would think it was big pussy pomp and sarrow But it was it wasn't you know you're doing that spot in is you get loudly like disgusted. Oh And then I grab there's a guy next to me who was watching Fox News. I'm not kidding the entire flight He had like an apparatus to hang his phone off the seat Like the fucking the fucking hand Bobby with it holding so he does it He's just looking and he just he's sending Fox News just white knuckle. I just staring at the phone It's like the conservative version of like where you don't do anything on a plane Yeah

Using your flight Grab that guy Disgusting was it like a live stream is it like a video on like social media? It's a live stream. You watch live TV on the Wi-Fi. And then an Applebee's commercial comes on and the system continues and the blood turns the wheels more and more. There is a new factor flavor that I've been enjoying. A new factor flavor? Why don't you. What? Factor flavor?

Why don't you start laughing immediately? Wait, from the top. No, no, keep going. What's the f**k? New factor. There's a new factor meal I like. And I'm getting crucified like Jesus. What's this?

Robot monkey? Like what's the f**k? It's called three penis casserole. Yeah. See that? When you said, I knew it. When you said it was a new flavor, I was like, he's gonna say he's some dolly shit. That sounds like, they have a lot of Beelz slime, but that one sounds like it might have a little more prep than normal.

It doesn't, that's the thing. None of them do have prep besides the two minutes you had optionally thrown in the microwave. Can I ask if that casserole is protein plus or keto? Oh my god, it is protein plus. The three penis casserole is protein plus or keto? Oh my god, it is protein plus. Yeah, the three penis casserole. Surely something this unique would be more expensive. It's not. It's the normal one. And if you saw a black label because you can't get the premium ones, the black label.

Yeah, the truffle filet mignon, the shrimp, the brother. This one's blue label because it's pescatarian. Slime, lock me up. Lock me up. I don't want the three penis casserole. I would like other, I would like to eat other options. That's okay. You can't get it. That's okay.

When you use Coe in the yard, they only send the three penis casserole box. Now, can I stuff the three penis casserole in my pants, make my print look better? You, I mean, you honestly, you can do that with the roasted garlic chicken. You can do that with the turkey mac and cheese. You can do that with bowling paper towels.

You can do that with paper towels. You don't need a factory to do that but you could. It's a good idea. Either way look if you want the three penis casserole or all of their other fine options 30 plus options protein plus shakes anything like that juicy. There's a lot of options. Factor Meals dot com slash a yard 50 use code the yard 50. 50 percent off your first box to get your taste at some first box. Guarantee one penis three penis casserole. It's a new flavor. We'll give it to you. It's a new flavor and we could only make 1.25 of them. Wow, another disclaimer that the three penis casserole is not FDA approved and... They're working on it.

It's fine. They'll get there soon. It's America's number one ready to eat meal kit. Now let's all soy jack at Ludwig's print. I hit the jackpot on my flight. I got on and I immediately got hit with the can you swap seats? They split us up. OK, never how it works. But they wanted me to swap window to aisle. You like aisle. I like window. OK. They wanted me to swap from window to aisle.

Hold on. Yeah. How long is the flight? You know what? Keep going. It's 11 hours. You just keep going. Keep going. Windows. I'm going to keep going. So I I keep going. It's 11 hours. We just keep going. Windows. I'm going to keep going. So I so it's it's but anyway, they want me to swap. It's his father and it's his daughter. And I'm like, I'm not going to split up.

I'm not going to split up a family. Why not? Because I'm not Kamala Harris at the border. Right. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly what I was. I am exactly what I am. That fucking rotten bitch. Don't famously. That's exactly what I am. That fucking rotten bitch does. Donald Trump famously.

Famously. He didn't do that. Prevents that from happening. They call him the uniter. The uniter of families that aren't white. They made a big wall where they could all sign it together. Like a cat. That's what he did. Like an old yard podcast studio. And so I say, okay, hit the jackpot, We take off. See you next time he's free. I get both.

You paid it forward. You paid it forward. You got rewarded by the universe. Are you in? Hold on. Hold on. Are you in fucking business class? Oh, a lot of tone.

Let's do that again. Try it again. Try it again. Maybe with a nicer tone. Didn't you? Hard to read your tone with the Botox. Yeah, I can't see your face. I can't tell what your eye...

Is he happy? Yeah, is he smiling? Is he mad? Ludwig, I thought you were traveling business class. That's right, sir. That's interesting that this is such a moral dilemma for you, given that the seats are nice and you can lay down and sleep in them no matter what. You would know if you sleep in business,

windows better. This is insane. It's better. This is insane. It's inarticulately better. Well, something can't be better. It's a $10,000 seat. Wait, why is it better?

Because when you sleep in the aisle, you are like, you see and like you're open and you have less space. Oh, you're right, man. You literally don't. You literally do. Because I'll show you though, it's the Airbus

320. If you want to look it up, it's Lufthansa and they have been on a Lufthansa Airbus 320 business class. They have more storage on the right one to the window. I literally it is going to sound lame. But on the way over, I flew aisle and the way back, I was like, I'm going window. I had that thought to myself. I had the thought. No, that's fine. It's not lame.

I think and so I decided to pick it because You had the thought. I had the thought. No, that's fine. It's not lame. I think. And so I decided to pick it because I had the thought. But having the whole business class, having the whole aisle to yourself, having the whole aisle to you in business class makes no difference. Having the whole row to yourself

means nothing in business class because you have a fucking bed to lay down and you dumb bad. You were like, hey. No, I don't like the privacy of it. I don't like the people looking at me while I sleep. The guy, the guy in my business class seat next to me wasn't- It was an open one.

These aren't the ones. This is delusional. I also fuck with the empty seat for like the- Oh cool, no social pressure of being next to a person for 11 hours. Dude, you're in business class. They're like 20 feet away from you. Let a rich man have a trouble. Oh my god. Let a rich man have a trouble or Oh my god. Let a rich man have a trouble or two.

I hate agreeing with Aidan. It pains me more than the pain in my face. But today he's cooking. I'm not saying I was in hell of a pile. And I'm not upset. I'm just telling you, I hit the jackpot. Guy directly next to me. Guy knows I'm not upset about this.

He hit the jackpot. I can't talk about hitting the jackpot. Do you see an inkling of a furrow? I don't see it. There could be a dog walking in right now, I don't even know. Guy next to me on plant? Oh, no big deal. Dog across a restaurant? Oh! Yeah.

Yo, God, what are they even... He's so close to me. Treats it like he's Cambodian. He's so close, and I bet he's gonna bark. I bet he's gonna bark, but he hasn't! He hasn't! He hasn't yet! But I bet he's gonna.

But he could! Here's the thing, you're worried about dogs, but. Haven, I'm worried about humans, Mr. Haven. Ooooo, true, cause guns don't kill people. I fucking walk out, I get to Baltimore fucking BWI airport, some guy lets his dog out of the carriage, and he's walking through the terminal, and they're walking along, dog not on a leash, he's just letting him free-ball it through the airport, and then they're like halfway through the terminal, dog just runs over to a pole It takes a piss. Yeah, and then the dog

Yeah, come on bud, and then dog follows him takes the piss and why are you in? Because why are you as a man looking at a dog's penis? Hold on. Wait, where was this in Baltimore Airport? Interesting. It wasn't let epic la pill epic leh Pissing me off flew to Baltimore from LA. Yeah, it wasn't Le Epic LA Pill Epic Le. Pissing me off. He flew to Baltimore from LA. Yeah, he's probably living in Baltimore. He's probably living in Baltimore. It's coincidental. Can you look up Devo Kicks Pigeon on YouTube, Zypper?

This is what this reminds me of. If you guys ever watched Devo. No, I have not watched Devo Kicks Pigeon. Why not? I don't know why. I don't know what it is. Dude, no, I thought you didn't see 90 percent of things. You then I just mean of like YouTube culture. Oh, so now you're the goalpost.

I can see them. They've gone so far away. I can't. This is devil. Fuck you know what time it is. It's fucking devil. Whoa, whoa. We're fucking stood on that! Fucking hell! Look at that!

Ah! Fucking pigeons on that here! Oh, that's minging! Is he dead? Is he dead? Do you think he's dead? I can't believe that guy... Oh my god! I actually cannot believe that guy edits our videos.

You know, Archie does know about Devo, which is funny because Archie was like five when Devo came out, which is which means it shows the depth of how into culture Archie is. Is this a viral video or is he famous outside of this? I mean, that video is pretty famous, but he had a series. The same guy that made Salad Fingers, he produced Devo. Yeah, we talked about him before. But yeah, it's a it's a jewel of my my teenage development.

Because he's going to fucking dickhead. You got a bell end. Dickhead. You guys know how like people will just fucking make up shit and post it on MI the asshole. Yeah. And yeah, like our friend Ken Chen. Yeah, like Ken Chen. And just post on there, see if they can get it.

We were talking about this yesterday. Yeah. And I read this. This one popped up on Reddit. It was just, you know, some story of like, am I the asshole? If my like fucking 36 year old husband, I'm 20 female, like, is mistreating me for this. And like, and we've been together for two years. So it's like, yeah.

So when you got together, he was 34 and you were 18. Yeah, and you just graduated. She's just like eloquently explaining this guy being a piece of shit. And I'm reading this and I'm like, this just seems. Convenient, you know, it's written in a way that is like, this is obviously, I think this is somebody trying to get Reddit Karma. And I go to this guy's profile, or girl's profile, and I read every other thing on this profile

is them on a League of Legends jungler subreddit talking about like jungler tierless and like what's good in the meta right now. Every single comment and then there's one Gigantic well-written post about how they're like older boyfriends abusing them You didn't even get on an alt to the scam Nobody checks and then every comment on the post is like not the asshole can't believe this guy is doing this and it's like I'm and this person is literally Talking about like whether or not Vi is still good in like this season

What's wrong with someone who plays a little league on the side and then get screwed over by an ex? This can't happen. Pretty lightly sure it could happen They can't play scarred because the meta and also get hoed I They can't play Skarner because it's the meta and also get hoed? I just noticed the way that they wrote on the jungler subreddit was very different than the way they're called code switching. That's what this is for. Dude, Reddit code switching, just putting epic bacon everywhere. I just like started.

I was just because I like how you invest. I've been told this and I've never I've never dug into it. And I think I've had the ideas like a lot of am I the asshole posts are like extremely convenient. Yeah. That are just like not the asshole bait, I would say. So so Reddit bought it hook line. Yeah. Yeah. This was like top voted. That's why I even got it. It's because I mean, it's overall they always buy it.

Reddit always buys it. But then I started digging through the top posts of like the recent time. And it's like it's most of them. I was like blown away that it's like this subreddit. It's kind of like pro wrestling though. It's just like, yeah. I think you'd rather live in the universe where it is real and it doesn't matter if it's fake.

I don't like that. I'm not saying you should like it. I think it sullies people. It's like rage bait. It just sullies people's view of the world for like no reason. Like if you actually, if it is true and you actually have a problem But like I feel like nobody who's writing that problem who has that problem would be Presenting it to MI the asshole in an open question. Well, that's you not believing women, but maybe yeah

Maybe I maybe I'm going to the dark side and we feel we fiddle with sticks. Mm-hmm How does it make sense because you're saying that we have done any sense What does that mean in context of what he said mentioned junglers? Love it was excited about that What is it? We're fiddling with me. It was stick. I'm not gonna let this go. You can't you could let it go Why would we have guns in relation to what he said? It doesn't matter. Yes, it does. It doesn't have to matter It doesn't matter. Yes, it does. It doesn't have to matter Getting great. I'm salty. It's getting great I think the way your mumu sometimes kind of salty because he keeps trying to do wordplay. I never get it

Dude, it's crazy how he doesn't get it. He always says something I'm just like I don't know what you're saying and then I explain it and then you oh That is good. And then the fucking the moments gone. I don't always I go limp Is a goddamn down to finish Said you gotta stop the volley bear Lily is high Okay I think Lilia's hot. Wait, sexually. Okay. You're actually speaking. Oh. I've been deep in AIO.

What's that? Am I overreacting? Oh, I get them all the time. It's the same shit. Different fucking corn syrup. It is the same shit, but I think some of them are real. Some of them are real. Of course some are real.

I think a lot more of them are real and they're just looking, maybe they're looking for upvotes, but I feel like they're just looking for validation and being right. Yeah. Because it's always like, am I overreacting? And it's like a screenshot of their significant other cheating on them. And it's like, am I overreacting? You know what I think about every time I read threads like that too, is it's like, it's like therapy. It's like when you...

I would say a potential problem with therapy or these types of posts is that who you're speaking to only gets the information that you present them. They don't get an honest third party's view of situations. They get what you choose to share with them, and then they get to build their opinion from that. Well now Aiden, I would say this is not a problem with therapy because therapy is not solving your problems.

Therapy is about your own resolution within this problem. So the other information doesn't even matter. You're right. This is happening on Twitter, because there was that like person who posted like, I can't handle a 10 out of 10 girl. And it's like yeah cuz she was asking for $150 she's asking for like 150 bucks and he's like you seriously need to find another guy like I can't afford I can't afford you and then she like quote retweeted it

with like him being mean to her and it went really viral and then he quote retweeted it like a day later with her cheating on him like for three years And then like the last message after him being like well, I'm mad You cheated is like her being like, can you please get me this? And it's a it is crazy the window that we were given and we see into these people's relationship and that's all you think it's real Yeah, 100% I think these are two real people. As far as what their actual relationship is, the easiest thing is go, ah, that's toxic,

and then just stop watching. It's weird. I think you wonder sometimes, like, is this real or not? And then you remember talking to a coworker and then describing their partner. And like, yeah, he just does that sometimes. And you're like, what? What the fuck? Like, that's happened a lot in my life.

And then you realize that, like, there's a lot of dysfunctional relationships out there for a lot of people. And it's easy when you just don't like we have very comfortable lives where we don't have to, like, meet new people. You guys ever had partners who have asked you for money, like, like shopping money? Never once in my entire life That's something I hear about a lot, and I've never once experienced. Yeah, I've never that's never happened to me but maybe it's just cuz I'm broke as fuck I had like

I've had like five different partners post having money. Oh I mean, I guess having a lot of money and no one not Not even like a lot. I just mean like, like, I feel like in high school, it would be very weird for someone to be like, yo, can I have like a hundred bucks? Cause you're a high school. It's like, ah, I had a job. Yeah, I know. But like you're a high school. I guess, I guess. It'd just be like, yeah, I guess. I got my first job because my girlfriend at the time had a job and I felt broke. Yeah, I was like, I was, I was, I was broke. I was like, feel broke. This broke talk.

I know I wanted to buy her stuff. I was like, oh, I'll get a job. No, this has never happened to me. But it's because I'm so damn charming. That's what I was going to say. Because you're so charming, they give you money. I get money. I get paid.

They give you money for your presence and you I get paid. You money for your presence. And you find out you're actually a prostitute secretly. Yeah, no, I'm a vibes prostitute. You people, they pay me come to the vibe. I want a vibe at the cultivator. I was right. I don't know. Never are you. I would never be the big man.

We're in the room. What's your refund policy? Hey, guys, what are you guys up to? Hey everyone, do you want to play Slay the Spire board game? Look at this guy. That would hit though by the way, Slay the Spire board game. People do like it. I know, I'm saying that would hit. If you pulled up, that would hit. Well then that'd be a successful vibe prostitute for you.

Vibes procured. It would be like that Dark Souls vibes procured once I walked in. You wanted me to go, because I bail on QT's Friendsgiving. I wanted to go to the club. I wanted to go to the club. Well, then that'd be a that'd be a successful vibe. Prostitute vibes procured. If you ever get Dark Souls, that's what I was procured. You wanted me to go because I bail on cuties friends giving. I wanted you to go bail. And you're feeling bad because I was like surgery.

The messenger and I was like, hey, my fucking face looks like there's a baseball I hid in inside of it and I can't eat solid foods. And then Ludwig messages me is like, you got to go, man. Well, OK, she messaged me. She's she's because she's all worried because she got a rag tag group. Yeah. She got 20 fucking who's and what's and have them. And it's the island of misfit toys. I know. And she's and she's their savior.

I don't like nice. It's the island of misfit toys. And I'm like, well, let's get a lot of hugging bear in that bitch. And I'm like, and she's like, slime's not coming. I'm like, and she was all stressed. I was like, I was like, don't worry, baby, I got. Here's her stress. Her stress was the idea that I'm like, and she's like, time's not coming. I'm like, and she was all stressed. I was like, I was like, don't worry, baby, I got this. Here's her stress. Her stress was the idea that I'm a social glue.

Oh, which I know. Well, I don't know. He is. I don't think that's necessarily true. In a large group setting, is he the social guy? Look, let make no mistake, I'm fucking awesome. But in a larger group setting I tend to Recoil yeah All you would need is to be electric for 45 minutes get the vibes going Would you say he's usually electric in that setting? I think yeah, I think he hits I think he's electric

He's electric in small groups. It was a lot of it was I think miles Zeke I think Miles, Zeke, Tina, FanFan, FanFan's mother, Bjergsen. You know he would have had a ball with that. You kidding me? Me and FanFan's mom would have smoked a half a blunt and talked about some real show. Half a blunt would have been smoked. We would have talked about Stardust. You smoking it with her in the corner?

I think Slime would have connected the Zeke miles to the fan fans. And what I told what I told. Which is that's the bridge you have to cross. I was like, who's crossing the bridge? But I said, I was like, dude, Miles is going. He will unite all worlds. Miles is the social glue. Miles can be. Yeah, Miles can be too.

So I didn't know. I didn't actually buy this. I think that he was just trying to say something nice to get me to go and he actually didn't believe no I believe this my whole pussy Your monkey Watch your monkey I tell my girl I go don't worry about I got you and it's gonna mess your slime He's like I really can't come I was like ah and I go back to her like never mind

I said my face like I was like this is why I lied to you. I played Lee with him I think not that night, but the night after yeah, yeah, he was just like Dude I I had to wear I had to wear like a thing in my mouth It was like a retainer that like is plastic over the top of your mouth and your teeth. I have that. You can't even talk. It's it's like it's not even like all over. Yeah, like your teeth and the roof of your mouth are protected

because they cut, you know, tissue from it. Oh, I didn't want to think about looking at it. Do you want to? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. See your bottom gums. I'll try really hard, but I can't like stretch it or else it tears this. I don't want to see. Oh, wow. They're getting there

They're getting there After like three weeks it just becomes new gum. That's it. They actually is kind of crazy You know the shit part is I got to get it again on the other side I thought both were... That's awful. Died. That's what I just want to die. Tell what the guy said to you about...

Bro, I was like, he's just snipping my shit up, fucking talking about how he's an expert. And I'm like, this is great. You're great. And he's like, you know, it's awesome. Like, people usually get what you're doing in like two or three sessions. It's really cool that you're doing it in one.

And I'm like, I never had the option. You didn't tell me anything. You just said, this day can you do this day I said sure and then he just I sat there for fucking two hours Loki that's better maybe that's some Dennis shit like it's like oh yeah you're the best I ever had yeah yeah fuck it if I'm throwing B minus dick and he's saying geez Louise sweetheart I'm like I'll believe it. That's me. That's you guys believing in the Reddit posts. That's my version of that.

Yeah, because sometimes it makes you want to believe. I have to go back in three weeks, get the stitches out of my gums. You call it like the day before Christmas this time. Like, my life is fucking miserable. It's not miserable. I have I'm December 18th. I have to go and get the stitches out ofba guns. Christmas Eve, guess what's happening? I'm getting a heart MRI.

Because apparently that's the only time they can fucking do it. Crazy. The lady, she was like, OK. Here's where we get Chinese. So the only time I have is December 24th. Don't call it that. Yeah. Say the only time you have is Christmas Eve.

And I was like, Christmas Eve. And she's like, If you celebrate. Yup, that's it. And I'm like, now I asked her a question. I was kind of grilling her. I was like, if I was dying, would this be any different? And she's like, yeah, probably.

And I'm like, alright, fine. Give me that shit. Because apparently it's like a complicated one. It's worth checking out. You don't do much for Christmas, no? No, it's just the principle. Sure. Yeah, sure. Yeah, I get that. What if some plans come up? Or what if maybe the guy who needs cookies?

This one will take him out, right? And MRI doesn't like slow you down. It'd be fine. No, it's fine. It's just a test. And then it's just like they're going to the Apex twin machine. And yeah, wait a bit. They're missing me at the Denny's. Yeah, they're missing you I gotta put in time. They're gonna be sitting there like fucking. That humble weed goes by the table. Grand slam is just gonna slowly start losing some heat You dumbass will all be gone. You'll be with your beautiful fucking mom. You'll be with your awesome beautiful mom. I'll be God

I'll be here. I will. I won't be with my mother What? God bless her heart. I'm hanging with you. Oh, that's right. You're all gonna be out fucking doing some dumb shit. I'm gonna be out Denny's. Yeah. Well you can bail on your part appointment and come with me. I can't. Where are you going? Hong Kong. You're going to Hong Kong again? Ehh. We should shut that shit down. Yeah, you going to Zipper 3? Nah. You should shut that shit down. You- well, I guess if she's not coming with me I could shut that shit down should shut that shit down. She does not go- You- Well, I guess if she's not coming with me, I could shut that shit down.

Shut that shit down! Mm-hmm. It might be prime time to shut it down. It's prime time, baby! Also, more- Go to Kowloon! More Botox. Bring Kowloon back.

More Botox, my Xi Jinping shirt. Can you bring Kowloon back? Kowloon? Bring it back. No, I'm trying to take over Kowloon. It's gone. I'm trying to end- That old guy from the anime.

I'm trying to end the autonomy of Kowloon. Kowloon's gone. What do you take over Kowloon. It's gone. I'm trying to end the autonomy of Kowloon. Kowloon's gone. What do you mean? Kowloon? What do you mean it's gone? He's gone. I said the sentence. No, you're wrong.

Kowloon is a geographical place. They have a geography argument. Kowloon, are you talking about the city? That old hidden city? Yeah, that's different. So I'm saying bring that back. Okay. But you know that Calhoun... The place is still there, yes.

But they can agree on where it is. Alright, and we're back in. And time. Time, wow. Great work, you two. I held it in. I'm holding it in. It was good. Love me. A lot of improvement. Appreciate that. You started fighting a losing battle.

It ate him.. Botox. I keep telling you. Really would like some of that. Yeah, we can get you set up. We can do that tonight, dude. In on this trip with with Zipper 3, I was hanging out with her family and I was hanging out with a lot of her extended family, and naturally people have questions about what I do for work work because I think it kind of like trickles to them loosely what

I do. But I think in the game of telephone, it's been like I play video games for a living somehow. Yeah, you're like ninja for a night. And then going, it's like one hour later. And I find out talking to them about this that they have a cousin or like another member of the family He's a 19 and his name is Haven Lowe Come on

Fucking come on Him, my cock Haven Lowe And he's a giant dude and they're like yeah, he does TikToks like he does the fucking dances and stuff, you know Dude, he's got two million followers onok. I'm not even the most clouded Clouded social media guy in this family. That's tough. I'm kidding and then I went and looked at this guy's you know I go and look at the numbers. I scroll through the top dude He's got a fucking eight recently eight million view video where he fucking hits a dab with the Rizler

Recently 8 million view video where he fucking hits a dab with the Rizzo Wait a minute Aiden we need this this is our link This is our line. Yeah, how the fuck did he meet the Rizzo? I don't know he fucking he's a young Haven haven oh, do I would why would youG-H I wanna do the jackass prank where we put an airbag in his fucking chair No Woo! Oh, for the- He goes right through the room

He's 11 He's 11 That's why he'll go so much further He's stuck in there like Tom How old is Haven? Haven is 19, I think That's crazy. And they were asking me, they were shaking me down about how much money he makes.

Like how much money he makes on TikTok. And then I had to take my educated guess from my wealth of knowledge. I've made 10k lifetime. TikToks. You know, he might be doing ads. Maybe you're getting, on the arc, you got some 20 million followers on TikToks, dude. Maybe you're bigger. Yeah, dude, every girl has a craft drawer. Shit went crazy viral.

You got some big tic tocs on YouTube shorts or tic tocs. Well, it's both. But but yeah, your sound of every girl as a craft drawer has gone insane. Really? You didn't know this? I didn't know this. I didn't know this either. Dude, it's massive. We want to know. Are you talking like you you like Ninja right now?

The hating craft drawer meme is huge. It's big enough to where people posted it constantly on the subreddit and it was a sound that was transplanted to like a ton of different TikToks. That's sick. And like girls talked about it. 20, like 100, 2000. I don't know, man. Take your time.

Try to find an example. Yeah, an example of the. If Z't know, man. I want to take your time. I try to find an example. Yeah, an example of the Zipper is listening. I know. What am I supposed to say to like all these aunts and uncles? Like I we don't have the Rizler on our show. You know, the Rizler. Yeah, we don't have shit. What if we make one? Oh, oh, again.

The Rizler, I do think, was formed in a factory. That's what I'm saying. I want to make our own. He's like an X-Man who can eat. But if you can make one. If I can get one bite, I can figure out the recipe. If you can say that, you can't say that about the Rizzler man. Just trying to suck on the Rizzler's finger.

Nutmeg weird. He's like he's a little America's sweetheart. He is. He was in that Mr. Beast video. Oh no that's the other one. Oh big big justice. He was in the Mr. Beast video. Little Justice right? Or is it Big Justice?

Big Justice. There's no Little Justice. In the same vein of people like building narratives and assuming things from like the limited amount of information they get and immediately saying things and taking sides and da da da. What really popped off recently was they all went on Jimmy Fallon.

And there was a bunch of like Jimmy Fallon body language dissection, like Jimmy fucking hates these guys' videos. Yeah, I saw that. And in a similar vein, I hate that type of content because Jimmy might just like them. He might. But Jimmy, Jimmy Fallon is also like a worthless industry scumbag. Yeah. So why spend any time on it?

Shitting on him is like it's kind of it's it's like a good thing to do. It's like, is that shitting on him, though? Yeah, because you're taking the side of the rhythm I think is Kevin Hart not an industry shill bag Kevin Hart. He's he's a piece different He doesn't TV show or sorry a talk show. Well, I don't wait does he yeah the Iced's I figured what they call it. You have a talk show? Maybe talk shows. It's like a restaurant closed down. I think you're on if you're on network talk show TV.

I don't think Jimmy Kimmel's is bad. Is that on network? I think Jimmy Fallon specifically sucks. I think it's fine. I think you might be looking around still, but if could you pull up is Jimmy Fallon super TF episode? It's very funny. Which one?

The one I think with Sinatra. Oh, I think they might have been on both, but he's on twice. There's two of them. Yeah, there's one. It's a zoom call and there's one with him and Sinatra. Yeah, dude, he is, Jimmy Fallon is hammered during this and he's not even trying to hide it. Really? You go to a spot where Jay found just talking.

Dude, Super's old haircut made his forehead look like it is. Wait, how do you know he's hammered? You just have to play it and listen. I don't know what East Forge is, but I know what Forge is. Yeah. And so now, do you travel with the team? Or what is life like? You wake up in the morning.

OK, wait, pause. What? You are just like the people Aidan was talking about. Were you analyzed? Jimmy Fallon. I watch this. I watch this. If you watch the whole thing, I think it's pretty clear. He's just like, wow, that's so crazy. I watched this when this came out

and I didn't have that thought. Well, that's because you were 16. This did not come out that long ago. It wasn't that long ago. I don't know. Call me crazy, man. I think he sucks. No, but that's what I...

Look, I think you're right, Hayden. People think someone sucks and then they extrapolate because they suck. Just make up shit. They make up shit about the person because they suck. But I think they can just suck and you can take the real reasons they suck, just make up shit. They make up shit about the person because they suck. But I think they can just suck and you can take the real reasons they suck as a reason to hate them. This is what I'm saying, this is what I'm saying.

As opposed to make up reasons to hate them. I also got fed a video. I'm with you, I'm with you. Some channel that fed me a video about how Logan Paul and Jake Paul like hate each other and they have no chemistry on their podcast. And it got fed to me and I'm like, at first I fall for it because I click and I'm like, I don't like these two people.

Let me watch this. And then 10 seconds, 15 seconds in, I'm like, I'm falling. I'm being tricked. You guys are missing a critical aspect. They can just be shitty without over analyzing things like that. Lying is awesome. Lying is cool. And it's fun as hell.

And then just when I thought it was out, he pulls me back in. Here's the thing though, I saw the clip of Jake Paul and Logan Paul and they're like arguing and I think in the same context. And I don't like those guys and I watched this like they obviously like each other. This is fine. Yeah, that's what I thought. So I'm not like, I don't think I'm blind to this shit. No, I don't think you are either. I think people are just so like, I don't mean you specifically. I actually don't, I didn't even this shit. I don't think you are either. I think people are just so like... I don't mean you specifically.

I actually don't... I didn't even bring this up with you in mind. But what I'm saying is, when the Rizzler went on Jimmy Fallon, and talking, saying that in that tone, it just kills me inside. But when the Rizzler went on Jimmy Fallon, and Jimmy Fallon didn't seem to vibe with AJ, Big Justice, and the Rizzler, and the Dooms, and the Dooms and the Dooms. Right. I think, yes, there was some overanalyzing going on, but I also think there was some merit to it,

even if he was playing into like a heel thing. And I think there's a mixture and it's not black and white. You're right. Jimmy Fallon can be a scumbag and also in this moment, be overanalyzed to a point where it's like people are hating on him for a reason that he doesn't deserve. Look, this all started when that white woman explained why Monster energy worships the devil the same thing and I think that stuff's cool Like yeah different. I was gonna say that cuz that's not a huge. Okay. It's like hey look at the signs When you could just know you could just be like that's real White monster what is Aiden in Sweden? Let's go, dude.

Nice. This made me think of also on this trip. Ludwig, your print's looking a little, uh, well how do I say it? What's a nice way to say it? Well my print looks good. Demure. Berm? You know, it's so-

Clear? I think your print might need a little boost. Really? I'm just like as your friend, as a guy who is invested in your health downstairs, a guy who is invested in what your print might or may not come off as. I want you to be confident. I'm worried about talking to the doctor about my monkey. You're worried about the doctor talking about your monkey? You talk to a doctor.

You don't need to. You don't need to! Here, today this spot... DOC! My monkey's too small! The yard is sponsored by HIMS, a personalized ED treatment for your print. Damn! Wow. How does that work? I talk to a doctor and I say, hey, can I get the HIMS to make my monkey big? Look, you got doctor-trusted ED treatments such as chewable hard mints, treatments like the Vagran Cialis or their generics for up Ninety-five percent cheaper your print doesn't have to look the way it does. I save money and my breath tastes better

Yes, lovely good question. It is a hundred percent online. Oh, yeah, you don't have to walk outside monkey out You're irresponsible. So you don't have insurance. You don't have any insurance I'm not insured for anything, not not my car or my body. There's hundreds of thousands of people who are just like you, have weak print and they can get it all back. I drive daily without car insurance. If it's getting you down, it's time to find the option that works for you. Not even registered.

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Prescriptions required an online consultation with the health care provider who will determine if appropriate restrictions apply. See website for details and important safety information aid and do a little dance. Subscription required price varies based on product and subscription plan. Yes, we had to say all that and now we will say all of this. So one of one of Zipper 3's friends comes on like the Sunday that we're that we're hanging out because we're going to go to we went and tailgated the Ravens Eagles football game in Baltimore. Yeah, it was a great game.

I didn't go to the game. I tailgated it. Oh, never mind. They grow some dogs in the damn park. It was phenomenal. Genesis pre local and then not. And that's kind of hard. And where her friend that came out was telling us about her Thanksgiving. And she has a first cousin who's a DJ named Iquanimous.

Nice name. And Iquanimous apparently, this is the exact wording. Iquanimous showed up to family Thanksgiving with the primary in his polycule. Yeah, no. Yeah, you choose your primary at morning stand up meeting. So choosing the primary and this, he performed, he's like a burning man, DJ. She covers the most matchups.

Yeah. She's got the best coverage for the family. She meets grandma for sure. And this guy has a he's like I got a small Instagram, but he's got a bunch of like DJ videos with with Jake Paul. And he hosts these like sober only like spiritual DJ nights. And, you know, like he's also a family member. Come dance in the come dance in the forest.

This is this is not Zipper 3's family member. This is I say you got mogged twice. This is her friend who was telling her us about her. Thanks. Yeah, we got Haven Aquanum. Yeah. And Aidan. And he's damn Valorant master out of control. He's like he's like one of those guys who's like he's like super super pro pro RFK let's go anti-vax like but makes you vibrate is vegan except like

what except for eggs and like some meat because he likes it that's I'm not even exactly I think that's a fair way to be vegan. That is the best vegan you can be. I like it. Sometimes you like it. But he's vegan. But he's vegan. I think it's fine if you're vegan, maybe you just like it. But you eat this. You like it.

I'm vegan, but I eat meat. Deadass, I like meat. I like it. But I'm vegan. And I eat meat. But have a couple carve-outs. Yeah. I'm vegan except Big Macs, that's chill.

Yeah. Dead meat, a crazy carve-out. And also all meat. A carve-out? Okay, that might. That'd be a crazy carve out. And also all meat. A carve out. Okay, that might be too much of a carve out. Might be too big of a carve out. I like it. So I feel like I'm doing a good job.

I'm scouting out good potential guests here. I'm getting those connections. This is good. I thank fucking Christ. You're trying. I got the Sarah Bonito follow from posting my pink switch. That's all I got. Not to say that's a diminished thing.

I was wondering what the connection was. But I'm very excited because she's awesome. I love her music. I like the one that goes, du du du du du. Me too. And also her DJ sets are insane. So we both we both connected. You're a DJ head.

Not really. Just her. I thought you listen to Andrea. I've never listened to Andrea. I sent Andrea at Sarah Benito's mix and I was like, you should check this out. That's so funny you did that. Why? Because it was like the one connection.

It was just more like, no, this was a while ago when I first heard the mix. I was just like, this is sick. I don't know if you would fuck with this, but I know this is what you're into. I was like grandpa at the fucking table. Yeah, yeah, that's what I mean. Do you like this? Yeah, that's the video game thing. Yeah Okay, we made it an hour anyway, so I'm play jungle

And jungle sick because you can control the game macro sense has already developed from a lot of Dota It's way easier than top top you lose the lane It kind of sucks you got the team's got a 4v4 and there's a great subreddit where people are just discussing strats What's up today? Am I the asshole? Yeah, am I the asshole for using the jungler subreddit where people are just discussing strats, what's up today, and am I the asshole? Am I the asshole for using the jungler subreddit to discuss my game? Am I the asshole for not taking smite? Dude, I was looking up so much stuff and people use the jungler subreddit as like counterintelligence. It's like top laners being like, hey jungle mains, I need to learn about Fiddlesticks

Q passive. It says out of combat. How long is that? They're just trying to find out so they can beat us. I mean it goes both ways, but the junglers are giving up the info It's not a game of hiding information should be oh shit. You're H box in it. Yeah Yeah, I am I am your big H box you don't want to play friendlies. Second biggest winning streak ever Second and silver medals are good for you. Very, very similar to your performance in league. If I was the second best ever to do it in league, that'd be show me.

Yeah, some people are okay with that. I would be OK with that. First of all, you want to be better than Baker. Yeah, of course. Could you be like Deft? Who's the second best in rookie showmaker? I don't know who the second best of all time. No clue. I couldn't even who the second best of all time no clue I

couldn't even imagine to tell you chovy anyway I'm about to grind I'm about to climb I have a confession what about like hey dude it's okay you come to me man what do you think we go play together no not a confession it's a question Confessions question. I would, what the fuck, fuck you. Maybe I like to play with you guys. I'll play with you guys, I'll do an in-house. We need an ADC. They're not in-house, five sec. Who's our fifth? Our fifth could be anyone.

Nick Kingling, Shakedrizzle. Yeah. This is a coveted spot, many of them watch this spot. We actually have a good selection. Cause what do you play? You would be top. Yeah, I'd be top, you'd be jungle, you'd be support. I'm just calling it.

Who do you play? Or ADC. Don't you play bot? No, I play probably... You have to be support. I'm just calling it. What do you play already? You play bot? No, I play probably You have be supported ADC. I mean I could be support. I'd rather play and then you go shake I play top jungle in support in that order. Why are you being mad about it? You're being a fucking asshole and I can tell because I can slightly wrinkle word But I think I bring more impact to the game if you give me a lane or jungle. It's a flex Q, man. You don't have to be like that.

Flex Q. You don't have to be like that. You have to, that's right. Why don't we do the Yard Plays League and we play until we lose? And that's the only time we'll ever play it. If it's one game... It will be. If it's one game. What the fuck? what is it?

Why are you saying that? Because it'll take us a while to adjust to the roles we'll have to fill. And I think that one game could just be the bad. Because shitload of mid. You play shitload of jungle. I play shitload of top. He is a top. Don't you understand?

I know. But was one person going to be filling a role they're not used to? Wait, what do you mean? We don't want who's our fifth. We don't have an ABC. We're gonna go shake ADC. Fuck. They can play whatever Yeah, you know Kenny. Well, John John is a car this one trick Josh could ADC. You're fucking cruel. Also Josh and miles But that's boosies I'm not being cruel. But they would have one too. Sheik has played so many games, he is the rank he is. Yeah.

Which is plat 4. Also, it's not boosties because that's how the match- it's just matchmaking. It's flex. Look at Sheik Drizzle, op.gg. After- look, after- I hate that guy and you're being unfair. If he's on his main account, it's not boosties. After 600 games, we can safely say he's that rank.

I don't think I'm fucking talking crazy here. OK, yeah, call him up. You want to say it? You say it to his face. I'll say it to his face. He's plat three. He's played so much. He's played so what is the amount of games? I think he has 600 this season. It's in the top left.

Holy shit. It's those two numbers. Pick up, Shane. What happened, Shane? We used to work out. They're beating your ass. Yeah, that's that's that's 524 games in the past, I think, three weeks. Shake, pick up. No. Well, maybe, sorry, month and a half.

I don't know. When did I just all season? Four more than 524. I don't know if it's all 14 or 14 point. Oh, that's a bummer. Innocent. That's a toughy. Innocent stuff. Um, he's a Carthus one trick.

Greg, we're in win rate on the Carthus, though. You're you have some fucking nerve to call him a one trick. I am blown away. I'm not. Look, I don't cast the stone. Not understanding. I'm a one trick. But I can't. I just played this game for so long. That's Shaker's of the least sin.

He probably has a 20 pool deep champ. You know what I meant? Sure. And that he could easily ADC for us. And that is not a problem. And you're saying we're too good for him. I kill yourself. I think the plat three that we would get in exchange would be giving higher value than we'd be getting out of our plat three unless we put shake mid on

Carthus Should we I think that's you're insane. Do you think we're getting the same value as shakes mid Carthus? Yeah I think you're gonna same I think it doesn't matter I Think I would still like to play with the shake on the fucking bottom. I'm not saying I would I didn't ever said anything I'm saying is how much you didn't want and how you're dumb I said it might last a game. That's all I said you were that's all I said When I brought up shapes when I brought up shake you were extremely resilient and started attacking his personal care All I said is it might last a game and I gave reasons why in a tone that was evil

I would love to go her mentals already in shambles I personally. Yeah, you're being crazy. Because I need someone else. I would love to play with Jake Dressel for 30 minutes. That'd make me happy. I don't think you're being crazy. I don't need you guys answer anymore.

You're being extremely cruel. I think Jake would do fine. I think Josh is obviously the best choice. But is Josh, but Josh boosts its boosted animal season. Why is it boosted? I guess for Josh, because he wouldn't have a main to play on. Yeah, because I don't think he's enough games in any account to account for what his actual rank is.

That's why you think it's boosted is because he hasn't played very much this season. So whatever account he plays on is going to be new and not reflecting of his rank. OK, so that we wouldn't get an equal person on there. Nelton, I said it's wrong. So then, Miles. That would be fine too. I don't know why you're so cruel to him. I'm not cruel to him. You're right. You're really nice.

I'd say it all to his face. Wait, you know who plays, you know who plays bot? Alex smokes mid. You know who plays a bot? The first time I played with Alex in his bard, which is very cute, I was like, you should ward over there. And he said, what's that? I would love to play League with Alex for 22 minutes.

And then he drops you a little hot chocolate. He's like, wait for it to grow. Wait for it to get bigger. When I was 15, we somehow FF and Flex Q. And everyone's like, who did it? Four of us. He's got a heart of gold. Well, maybe we rip it tonight.

Maybe we get on that. I'll do whatever you guys want, but it already sounds like Ludwig is pillow princessing and he wants his pussy, his monkey eaten all night. Do you pussy and your monkey? Chill! Dude, you got us working double time? I'm happy to play our one game. See what I'm saying?

What if we win it? They'll play second. So we play till we lose. Play till we lose. That's how it works. And if you throw, that's fucked up dark lives. Brother, op.gg will say innocent next to my name. We might need to do the opposite.

You think you're that nice? I'm that nice. We might need to do play until we win. Yeah, yeah. I like that better actually. Okay, so if we win the first let's play till we lose. If we lose the first let's play till we win the first, it's played till we lose. If we lose the first, it's played till we win. Yeah.

That's fine. Yeah. Sure. This is a good mix. That is fine. It is a good catch. Who lives plate? Dude, oh, they're gonna...

I don't want to say the strat. What? The strat is... is snipe us and then ban Lux. Oh yeah. That's brutal. It's snipe and it's Lux ban, Fiddlesticks ban. Baller Bear ban.

We actually have to go live as we're booting into the game. Nah, we should be fine. I think it's a good cool top. Because the thing is, Flex Q you'd have to sniper, it's really hard to snipe if they have... Oh, with Flex. Yes. So either they're sniping Solo Q in a Flex and then they're just going to lose because they don't have comms. Or they're a group of friends, which is low likelihood.

I feel like the... I guess if it guarantees you play another group. I think, yeah, well I think you can... I think it always guarantees like at least one group of three or something. And then it can be two solo fills. Do you only play jungle? Yeah. You know Bonfire, she was telling me, because she used to play like like as shitload of League,

and she's like in college, we had like a college League of Legends, like League, basically. And she was like, three people on the other team for the other college didn't show up or sorry, two people on her team didn't show up. And they're like, let's just play the 3v5. Did they win it? And they won. No, that's sad. I'm like, let's just play the 3v5. Did they win it? And they won. No!

That's sad. I'm like, you're a fucking gamer. That is fucking embarrassing. Holy shit. Yeah, also, Kony told a story at World's Greatest where he had a same thing, a college 5v5 match that he had with another school. Other guy on the team, little name of Boxbox.

Whoa. That's perfect. Yeah, he got destroyed. Yeah, he was a R Boxbox. Whoa. He got destroyed. Yeah, he was a Riven one trick top. He was crazy. This was in like the 60s. It was in the 60s. Yeah, dude. OK, no, he's very young.

Only Albert. Yeah. For like how OG he is, because I think he has been a creator for over 10 years and I think he's younger than me. You look at box box age That's crazy. He was making videos when I was like in high school. He was a high schooler That's the fucking trick dude if box was younger than you he's 28 Me he's born in 96. That's awesome, and he's been doing content like twice as long as me

God, it's the squeaker diff. We're your diff. You know, damn squeaker. That's what I'm saying. Squeaker diff. I got I guess non squeaker diff, maybe then. Well, the fuck is the squeaker in the squeakers are like when you sound younger, when you're young. Yeah, you can't make contact. This is a pre-fubescent teenager.

He sounded like not a squeaker. So this the diff is bad in all other squeakers. I thought you're comparing him to you. Oh, I'm the squeaker. So this, the diff is him and all other squeakers. I thought you were comparing him to you. Oh, I'm the squeaker. You're, yeah. I'm getting diffed because my voice sounded worse. Yeah. You didn't hit, you're, you're, you're the little ass monkey didn't drop till.

I'm not liking monkey. I'm not liking monkey. I don't like when he says it like that. Cause what is it? His pussy. His pussy didn't drop? Yeah. Your pussy drops and then you become a woman.

Yeah. Yeah. Right? Yeah. It's an anatomy. We watched the video. I haven't learned it personally. I watched the video in fifth grade.

When they separated the girls in the monkey. I remember fallopian tubes. Yeah, it's part of the monkey. It's part of the monkey. Part of the monkey. A lot of different parts in the monkey. It's a blessing you've never taught. There's some parts of that monkey we still haven't found.

I would love to see you as a substitute teacher. I'd be awesome. I feel like you would. Dude, you'd be so mad at students, dude. You'd get so mad. No, because I'd only be there for a day. I think that what gets me pissed is having to deal with it day in, day out. I show up for a day. I had not committed to these kids. Right? I don't think this holds up. I think like like For example guy we met in Japan that you hated. This is a temporary guy. You will not see me again

Oh yeah, I remember that guy. But you went zero to a hundred. He pissed you off. That's different because I didn't expect it Huh? What'd he do? Remember that we would I don't know how much you did. Don't elaborate And I think it's different It's also like you follow if I do a stream where I know that I'm supposed to be a clowny Type of guy like when I go into open stream job, but I'm ready to take shit and I've been really good The last time and so there is a man yours bracket We used to sit together and he would lean over me like that one fucking picture of the guys in the studio Yeah, yeah over me like that one fucking picture of the guys in the studio yeah yeah except

it'd be him to ban someone yeah every time it'd be to ban and he'd scroll up and find it and be like okay and it's like you look commercial break so I what I would what I'm saying is if I was a teacher I would have gum surgery and I'd mess up my words yeah and I would be ready to handle that the goon professor I guess fucking really hard. Alright everyone, welcome to class. Goon 101, we're going over a lot of simple concepts in this class. No, Goon 401.

You'll notice there are smart boards on every wall. We have hacky smart boards for nefarious purposes. We went to a lunch for my grandpa's 91st birthday. For nefarious purposes. We went to a lunch for my grandpa's 91st birthday. Oh, my God. God bless him. God bless 90, 90 whole ass one. He's losing a bit of memory. OK. He sees my sister. He's not sure who she is. No, we he plays dominoes with my cousin's friend.

Pedro comes over. They play dominoes like, I don't know, maybe once every month or twice a month. And Pedro's over for Thanksgiving dinner. And he's like, who's that guy? Oh, my God. He asks three times. And every time, Joe's like, that's our friend. It's your friend.

You play dominoes. And he's like, I'll probably get him out of here. No way. And we're at lunch. And one of my cousins is Arabic. and he walks in and he's like, he's like, leans over to me. Arabic is a language, by the way. He's sorry. This will come in. This is why I said it.

But anyway, he walks in and then he goes, he goes, he's Arab. And I was like, I was like, yeah. And then he's like, really nice. I'm like, true. He's like, doesn't drink. I'm like, this is all true. It's all true. And then he just goes and then backs nice. I'm like, true. He's like, doesn't drink. I'm like, this is all true. It's all true. And then he just goes, and then backs off. I'm like, OK. All right.

This was close. This was close. We teetered on the edge. That's crazy. Yeah. We had a nice moment, though. He cried. What?

When? Why? He sang Happy Birthday, and he just started crying. During Happy Birthday? During Happy Birthday. He's probably thinking about some... Happy tear? I think so. He was like, we'll count all the way up to 100, then we stop birthday. I think so.

He was like, we'll count all the way up to 100 then we stop counting. I'm like, sure. I'm down for that. Count birthdays. Cause it was like the 91st birthday, they had the candles. So we'll count the candles all the way up to 100 then stop counting. I was like, alright, bet. 91 is a fucking run, man.

It is. He's never, I mean he always drank. He's become a fucking run man. It is. He's crazy. He has he's never I mean he always drank He's become a drinker though. That's hype. Well, it is super hype cuz it's like what the fuck else you gonna do man? Yeah, but like you still have a drunk 91 year old. Yeah, let him rock out. Fuck it. He's not gonna do anything You're 91. You made it that far. He pissed himself in the car. He's your grandpa. You have a better idea. He pissed himself in the car? No, that's when it starts to get sad. You're doing that on fucking damn 22. I'm torn, come on. He pissed himself in the car. He's your grandpa, you have a better idea. He pissed himself in the car? That's when it starts to get sad. I'm fucking damn 22!

I'm torn, because it is a little sad, but then it's kind of like, fuck it, you ball. Because you're 90. It's crazy, because they do become like... Because the way you have to take care of a 91 year old is similar to a child, but with different rules. They can drink. They can drink, but you water down the wine. Oh, you got to water down the wine. Interesting. You're not feeding that shit. You're not feeding. I just get mojay.

They're like yummy. It's a screwdriver. I promise. Yummy. It's beer. And he's like, OK, do you diet? A little light. At this at this tailgate I went to there, they had I don't know, just like hot drink. I don't know. What do you call the things that you push like tea or coffee out of?

I don't know. French press. But you push them out of. No, like you would bring them a thermos. A thermos. One of the giant thermos. And I go up. I'm like, I'm fucking freezing. I'm from California now. I'm not built for this.

I pushed, you know, oh nice, hot chocolate. Oh, you mean like the decanter thingies that have like the silver? Yeah. Yeah, and I'm sipping my hot chocolate and I'm like, oh, it's mint hot chocolate. It's really nice. It's like, it's like a little like, it's like really minty though. And then I'm drinking, I drink, I'm cold. I drink like three full cups of this. Gotta put back that mint. And then, and then I go, I tell Zipper 3 and her friend that I've been drinking this to keep warm. It's like, it's got a lot of whiskey in it.

I've just been sending chocolate, chocolate whiskey the whole time. I thought it was a minty. I mean, that's a good mix of liquor and tell. That's a good ass mix. And you were drunk as hell. I was getting drunk in the tailgate. That's what I didn't know.

I was getting drunk. Grilling up sausages, getting fucking drunk in the parking lot, bro. That's yeah, that's an anthropological experience. I was dapping up people left and right. It was stop roast. Who's your team? Who's your team in the birds? OK, they go birds.

So I'm sorry. It's the Ravens versus the Eagles. this situation? The birds. Go birds. So it's the ravens versus the eagles, so they're both birds. Go birds! I was a fan. All birds go. All birds. Anyone who flies, I'm four. That's awesome. No, I was hoping I would just like stumble into it maybe.

He loves it. He loves them damn ravens. They're good too. Eagles are better. They lost. double into it maybe. He loves it. He loves them damn ravens. He's big. He's a good too. Their eagles are better. They lost. The Eagles won. Wait, was Mango there? A lot of misinformation going on. I don't know what to believe.

No, Mango is there. They're Super Bowl bound. You didn't get a Baltimore. Why not? Eagles are fucking Eagles. They look amazing. Yeah. Oh, my God. I'm so happy for Mango. It's a big year for Mango. He's happy about this. Oh, my God. It's good. Yeah. They're coming. Rivals two patch drops what in two days?

December 3rd. Yeah. Yeah. We'll see what happens. We need a Eagles raster skin now. Do I pulled Mango when we were playing those friendlies? I didn't pull him. It's like we're already a side, but I kind of like leaned in. I was like, you think these rivals players are good at their own game? And he goes. They're all shit.

I knew he'd say that. I just wanted to hear. You know, all the melee players have this entitlement to be good. That is just so funny. It's bad. Is that losing? It is bad. And that's like all that matters is that they're losing.

They're just losing. The facts are that the rivals players win the tournament. Maybe I said, give us six months. So you're the only person who can maybe chirp a bit is like, Leffen's at the best performance, right? Leffen's good. But even that performance isn't enough. Plup, but he didn't even chirp.

I think Leffen is the... Plup chirps on the low. Sure. Like a smart guy. Yeah, he chirps respectfully. Leffen is quite good. Yeah, but Leffen is the one who chirped the most and also Godbeam. Yeah, but the thing with Leffen, I know people don't like the chirping, but he's the guy

who, in my mind, he kind of gets to do it. How many, I'm sorry, how many EVOs have you guys won? I'm a Leffen apologist as well, but the way he talks about crag is might as well be like he fucking punches mom in the face. It's like, bro, just... I agree. I'm not saying it's good. I'm not saying it's productive. It's and that's the issue.

It's not. It isn't close. It's productive. And that's what it is. But then he comes out and he wins a lot of the time. If he wins an event, he can bitch as much as he wants. That's what I'm saying. You have to third place is not enough. Yeah.

I think it's funny, too, when Leffen starts talking shit on a game you really like, you really are like, oh, OK, I get why people get really mad at him. Like the way he talks about Tekken, I'm like, dude, relax. Like Tekken didn't do anything to you. I can't imagine being a Guilty Gear fan knowing of Leffen, and then he comes to your game, he starts bitching about characters, and you're like, this fucking guy, and then he wins Evo, and you're just like, ahhh. It's so funny that he won.

That's badass. It is badass. And then he's just like, I'm out. He's wearing those awesome mom jeans. That's why, dude, that's why when he beat Salem, it was just like, you can't. That was hard core. You can't lose. It's like a villain. After all that is awesome.

So that's the that's what we get. You know, that's the package of Leffen. And, you know, he's sweet and then he's sour. He's like a damn one of them taffies. I think the same thing happens in reverse though. The Rivals players have been getting mad at the Melee players or just Smash players disproportionately. Like two days ago, someone was getting lit up

because there was some event in his Hunger Boxes coin box and it listed notable players. And then someone quote retweeted it and they're like, oh, fucking putting Larry Ler over me. And then everyone's just like brother Here's the resume People you know that picture of him standing in the kitchen in his hoodie People just spamming that photo and he's like talking shit on the legend. That was one of hugs his greatest Halloween costumes

Outfit Yeah, like I know I know Larry Ler you said that and Ierner outfit. Yeah, like I know Larry Lerner. You said that and I immediately thought of him wearing the Mega Man shirt. And I'm like, that's just the game. So I don't know what to tell you. And he was good at mailing. He's a whole else gamer. It's like, we had this.

When I went to high school, it was two middle schools combining. In the first few months, it was like, you didn't fuck with the other side. Well, in Degrassi, someone died on that shit. Two schools combining. Yeah, that's right. Lakehurst and Degrassi combined. Guess who got fucking wet up? JT. Yeah. He got stabbed.

Halsey Brookline combined. Guess who got jerked off on the ski bus? Jack's guy. Not me. No, I would have been sick. It was another. It was another guy. Damn. Well, it's awesome. I didn't get a shit beat. Isn't that awesome? That's guy not me. No, I would have been sick. It was another is another guy. Oh, it's awesome. I get a shit beat Fucking loan he's a landlord literally not does not a landlord No, you're sorry. You're right. He's a slave. He's not that

He's just, he's actually, no, you're sorry, you're right, you're right. He's a slumlord. He's not that either. That is just a different word for a landlord, no? It's on the Twitter. He says not a landlord. That's a throw you off the scent. Uh huh. Actually not a landlord.

Hmm. Slumlord. Is it? We don't know. Just is it? We don't know he's not a landlord. We just know what he is. I think a landlord is someone who owns land is the lord of it.

I don't think he has any land. I don't mean to take shots of this guy. I don't think he has any land. He could be a landlord. I don't mean to take shots at this guy. I don't know if this guy's got any land. No land? What's the lord of land? No land, Jerry. You can't just call him a landlord.

He's got no land. He doesn't even rent land. What's he lording over? He lives in an apartment. What's he lording over? I'm the landlord, not even a lord. Don't have any land. Thank you. That was not bad.

And then Kramer just says the N-word. Insane! Oh my god! Dude, that has dropped off fast. Saying the N-word? Seinfeld and the zeitgeist. Low-key, not even cool anymore. I don't know, I mean Seinfeld and the zeitgeist.

No, the emerald fell off. You're right. Yeah, well Jerry, Jerry's second day in Pilgrimages is zero. Seinfeld and the Simpsons. They're great. They're both relics. You guys want to go as the code name kids next door for Halloween next year? Yeah, well that was good.

You're number one. Number one. You're number four. I'm number four. And you're number three. I'm number, they said you're number one. Number one. You're number four. I'm number four. And you're number three. I'm number three. He's girl number three. You're number two.

And you're number two. Stingy two. I thought it was hot when I was a kid. I should clarify. Should I clarify that? Who did? I said number three and then I was gonna say the hot one, but then I was like, that's what I thought

when I was a child. Kid, cartoon. Sure. And I don't think that now. Yeah, it's like Naz from Ed Edd n Eddy. Yes. You think I'm the hot one now. Yeah Was it cuz my forehead? It's the Botox

Number five though. I don't know if I don't like being number two. I have a big issue with it The kids next door Two is like the right-hand man who wears the fucking old timey like flying cap. Yeah. And the goggles. And he's really he's very rotund. Yeah, he's a big guy. He's a big guy. Yeah. And you know, you're a big you're a big guy.

He makes the the damn the Rizzo look anorexic. Don't talk about the Rizzo. Don't I just want to see what they look like. God bless the Rizzler look anorexic. Don't talk about the Rizzler. Don't take it. I just want to see what they look like. God bless the Rizzler. God bless the Rizzler. I'm just saying I was a bigger kid. I was a bigger child growing up.

Well, that's why you're number two. But I was not number two. I'm number five. You're not. I'm number five. I think it's man. Stop saying it. You're saying number with a soft a now, which I't like all with the soft a to be clear it's Numb a h number is it yeah, cuz it's an acronym. I didn't like this show the kid

It's not a number. It's number which stands for something. Can you look up what number stands for? Wait me and Nick are being cute. I like how I'm the man Do you thought cuz I saw it because was black, I was going number five. Like it's like, it's like, it's like, yeah, so it's number one. Number one. That's number five. I didn't like that. Yeah. We were saying number up until that point.

That's number five. Just to be clear, I was not. I was saying number the whole way through. Oh, you're right. Is an intentional misspelling the designation for KND operatives. Yeah, I never watched an episode of this show, but I know the bald the whole way through. Oh, you're right. Is an intentional misspelling, the designation for KND operatives. Yeah, I never watched an episode of this show, but I know the bald guy's a leader. I watched several. I'll lead your fat ass into battle.

Can I throw you guys a fucking curveball? Show me the kids again. Show me the children. Show me the kids again. Has anyone pulled a picture of the kids? Number one, me. Dude, let me finish number three. Aiden number four slime number five. Nick, that's my list.

OK, I know what the reason is. No, no, no, no, no. It's crazy. You can't do anything. You cannot be number two. Clear reason. Slime is number one. I was number two. You can go number two. Oh, do Clear reason slime is number one. Ying goes number two. Ying goes number two.

Ah, do you want to say that to his face? It's not about the size at all. Do you want to say that? I don't think Nick looks flat. Would you say that to his face? Ying looks in the other room. Wait, wait, let's not get crazy. I think it's clear.

Look, dude, I don't know, man. I'm just that guy. I don't think that guy has to say it. You're you're trying to pretend that you're number one. I'm not number two, bro. You're you're trying to. Fucked up. Oh, you're fucked up.

I got bad news for you. And those sweatpants. Brille. Come on. It's just it's number two. Dude, it's just, it's- Number two, like Slime's got that shit on? He's a kid. He's a kid. He squats, he squats 350 when he's older.

He's in great shape. Remember when I used to have the Tims? Wait, can we see number two teenager? Maybe there's like an older version of him. I think they do have an older episode. Like a Rugrats All Grown Up. I think the only one who gets older is number one. No, because famously they're not supposed to get older.

The adults next door. Getting older is a bad thing. Dude, that's just they grow up and that's just a polycule. Teenage. What they I don't think there's a teenage version. I think there's an adult version. The storyline is actually really good for Codename Kid Next Door. Tell you what, sweetheart, you'll be my primary. Yeah, only number one gets spoiled.

I remember this episode. I remember the only thing I got frustrated because I couldn't watch TV a lot when I was a kid or at like consistent times. And as the show went on longer, they started to like build the world and the lore of the show. And there were a lot of episodes that like you needed to see the previous one to make any fucking sense. Because like I think American cartoons specifically are just like

you can watch any in isolation and it makes sense Yeah, but Codename Kids Next Door not so much. They were like world by the later seasons They were introducing you to all the other kids and like spaces and stuff like that It's like the wire of cartoons for kids It was kind of the wire of cartoons. Mike was over because they were staying for for rivals and they've been watching Dragon Ball GT Hmm, and I'm like, is this shit? Everyone says it's shit. And they're like, honestly, not really. It's like I wanted to see for myself, like 20 episodes in.

And it's a whole episode where they're just singing in a cave. And we watched it and I was like, this doesn't this doesn't bode well. And Mike's like, yeah, this was a bad one. I'm not going to lie. It was it was terrible. I watched some of GT and I really didn't like the film. I only watched a bad one. I'm not gonna lie. It was terrible. I watched some of GT and I really didn't like the... But I only watched like 10 episodes, I didn't like it. Yeah, it was... I was like, what the fuck are they doing?

Why are they doing this? There's so much Shonen anime is like that. They were all singing in a cave! New Shonen's different. This is old Shonen. What's trash tasting about GT? I wanna ask Connor. I don't know, They're also not good.

They're not good people to go to. And you don't even need to answer because you know what? You should only go to Gart. What do you think Gart? You don't think Gart has good ideas? I'm saying he's the only one you should go to is what I said. I'll talk to Connor about it. He would think that Joey's watch you stop watching anime.

Joey and me are beefing, so I don't want to talk to you. Connor doesn't know shit. Because Connor is a little life likelihood. Lifelihood is know shit. Cause Connor doesn't watch a little bit of anime. Likelihood is about anime. That's not true. That's wrong. It's false. It's false. Don't say like Ben Shapiro or whatever the other fucking thing is. Connor's livelihood? It's about anime.

If I didn't know about livelihood, I'm going to Connor. I'm going to Connor. That's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna hear about GT and hear how it's woke bullshit. He'd be like, ah, no, I I don't know. I didn't watch it I know people didn't like it, but I didn't want deeper deeper not too many episodes You think I don't like your fake. I don't key You think I don't wash my money Episode with Bulma showed a monkey

Bacteria There's an episode with Bulma shouting monkey. These fake dog monkeys fill with bacteria. Alright guys, thank you so much for watching the yard podcast or listening to it. It's wash your monkey Monday as of this filming. Make sure you wash up. Make sure you wash up and keep it clean. If you don't wash it, you have to wait till next week. If you're watching this, get Botox and post the pics in the subreddit. Get Botox. We think you will look better. No.

It won't come back to bite. Simon Cowell looks hot. It looks hot. It doesn't look like ventricle stomach. See in the primo, which is coming up right after this.