The Yard - Ep. 186 - He Just Keeps Losing...

Episode Date: February 12, 2025

This week, the boys talk about betting on the superbowl, completing the IronMon, and Ludwig finally reveals something to the boys... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Yes, he gets sick a lot. Dude, he's always done this. He's been sick a lot all his whole life. He's got weak throat. And remember when I was saying that and everyone was laughing at me like, oh, it's not about strong throat, weak throat. I got strong throat. He has weak throat.

He's not in the chair. I'm in the chair. You got a strong throat? That's all I'm saying. Effortlessly sick, said Zipper. Can I tell you something that Aiden did? What? That you probably don't care about because it benefits you,

but everyone else gets to suffer. I want to say, first off, I do care. And I'm taking this really seriously. I appreciate that. I'm coming to you as a third. He's taking it really seriously. You're bad at snoring. He's an arcolepsy.

Mine are funnier. OK, do you sound more cartoonish? That's. He's really good at it. You said more cartoony. He sounds exactly like my granddad. You I don't you. There's a big bubble coming from my. You must cross a certain threshold.

Then you can do that. Yeah. Old people are cartoons. That's why they drive. You can just say we come on. I don't drive a steamboat with pants on. OK, listen, Aiden. So the I think it was probably Bo back or someone from Genesis,

which we're going to next week, messaged Aiden and was like, hey, is anyone from like your guys squad like going to Genesis so we can give them like a fucking juicy pass and do whatever? He said, yeah, you can give one to me, Ludwig and Nick England. And that's it. And Tim. Yingling from the from the top. It's like a dream upstairs.

And Mike. There we go. OK, nice. Me and Nick just don't matter. Oh, you're going. Uh, well, you already bought your passes, right? That's not... He's just asking questions. I don't... He's just asking questions.

You did buy passes. Legally, he doesn't have to incriminate himself. I plead the fifth. I don't need to testify against myself. That is my fifth amendment right. To be clear, when I answered this question, I thought I don't care about my friends, and that's why I don't want to include them right That's what I and I just wanted you to say it I just wanted you to say it out loud and you finally say it I wanted to leave them in this is how to beat Slime in an argument. It's like admit that you're a piece of shit

No, it's a you say the thing that he's implicated because it sounds so dumb out loud No, I like I am a piece of shit. You're a piece of shit. And I'm sorry that I cut you off on last week's premium episode. I'm sorry I should let you say your piece. Wait, you cut him off? Apparently I cut him off. Did you bring this up?

No, the people must- I didn't say this. This is the people. I'm sorry. I mean, after the most dogshit take you've ever spit out. You know what? Dogshit take? We don't have to bring it to the main. We don't have to bring it to the main.

We don't. We don't. I love it. I love it. I love it. Welcome back to the yard, episode 178. This week. Is that actually it? I think that might actually be it. I'll toss out a number that I felt.

Relax. You don't love it this much. I think that might actually be it. I'll toss out a number that I felt. Relax. Relax. You don't love it this much. I think he does. He doesn't love it this much. I do. I literally do. It's so respectfully, it is so rarely in this direction. I literally do. It is so...

That's so crazy. So you're okay. Welcome back. We don't have Nick. Because he has a weak throat. He is sick. Yeah, just the sound effects episode. This is how I felt when I realized I was watching the half-crashing episode.

I was like, I'm not going to do this. I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this. Nick has a weak throat. He is sick. Just the sound effects episode. This is how I felt when I when I realized I was watching this halftime show at the Super Bowl and I realized that they not like us. OK, pause. Where were you watching this? They not like. Where were you?

I understand. You know what I'm saying? Yes. It like opened my eyes, bro. They not like us. Yes. They're not, dude. I don't. I'm sorry. They not. Who do what I'm saying? Bro! It like opened my eyes bro! They not like us, yes. Like they're not dude! I don't- I'm sorry, they not! Who do you think they is? Dude.

They not, they- That's a good ass question. Cause how much time do you have? I guess 86 minutes now. About 86 minutes left to tell you who they are. Well everyone sit down, put on the all night mask, and I'm gonna tell you a bit- no I didn't watch it. I didn't watch the Super the Super Bowl. I just like fell asleep. It's you didn't come. You didn't come to my freaking Super Bowl Fiesta.

My. Yes, my. Wow. He's hurt because. My. Yes, my. Ownership over this. Whose is it? It's not yours. Whose is it? It's not yours. So find out the owner. Not everything needs an owner. And a social gathering doesn't need an owner. It literally is.

What do pharaohs thought? Are you a pharaoh? You slave owner? You have slaves? You're with slaves? Yeah, the pharaohs. The pharaohs. We have to use pulleys to pull up the couches upstairs. And then when everyone got up there, they're like, how is the couch up here?

How did we do it? How did they do it? It's just like it's so triangular. That actually is how we have a we have a huge monstrosity of a CRT upstairs in this office. And that's kind of how people look at that CRT is like how they built the pyramid. Yeah, it's like a feat of strength. Was that just manpower? It was it was just raw men. And what sucks is that they did break it. They, in the process of taking it upstairs, it's, and now we just have a broken large CRT up here.

No, I thought Nick fixed it. No. Oh. We found out that it can't be fixed. We tried. What? Yeah. Yeah, he went on this like CRT journey of like trying to figure it out.

He can't, he's not here right now, so we just say he failed. Yeah, he failed. He didn't do it. He sucks. And he's not here because he thought a woman might watch this. Dude. He didn't want them to listen to him. You guys should see. So sometimes I'll like look at the comments together and like he gets he

he will ball his fist like Arthur if he sees a woman, if he thinks that a woman is commentating, because some a lot of usernames are anonymously. Yeah. Skater Dude 42. Somebody androgynous. Yeah, and he's just like, it's so mad. He's mad. So he didn't want to show up. Probably won't be here for a few weeks because of that, but...

He's got to cool off. It's a heath. We want him. He's been yelling all night. He's got a weak throat, so he can't show up on the app. It's tough when you have weak throat, but you can't admit it to your friends. What sucks is Nick's not here, so you guys don't realize the trip that I'm rocking right now. I love this shirt.

Do you know what this shirt is? Yes, it's the browns. I said that when you showed in. I said brown star. What is this, Bad Bunny? Okay, yeah. Then you said some racist shit. What the fuck are you talking about? You didn't know who Bad Bunny was. Obviously. There's no one who is popular in the 21st century who you know that I don't know. You didn't know?

I know who Bad Bunny is. Then why didn't you like my joke? Name a Bad Bunny song. If I do it, will I be absolved of this? Yes. Um, loco. No, no. That's, that's, I don't like that.

That's got to be racist. How is it racist? Because he just said a Spanish word. It's a good word. It just said a Spanish word. Yeah, if I was a Spanish singer-songwriter, I would make a song named that. She's got an innocent, she's got a loco. But a loco for body.

No, no, she's got an innocent face, but a sucia mind. Sucia? Means dirty, feminine. Well, feminine. Tell yourself. Next question. It's a pizza ass shirt. Oh, what?

I'm wearing a pizza ass shirt. What's that? I don't know what that means. It's drip. OK? OK. Look up pizza ass. You arebr, look up pizza ass. Look up pizza ass.

If this is some shit from a Kaisen ad stream, you have... Pizza, look up pizza ass. Maybe look up ass pizza. This is a pizza ass. This is like ass pizza. Yeah, my bad, it was ass pizza. Is this, this is fashion? I thought it was pizza ass. Wait, I actually kinda like that shirt.

Can you uh... Talk. So it's this 26 year old who puts the Hardee's logo or Carl's Jr. logo on shirts and then- and then spray paints it. And I only know this because Stadler got it for me as a gift. Aww. And I was like cool. And I thought it was just like a thrift. Like I thought it was just like a random...

It looks like a terrible quality shirt. Right. And then Alex walks in and he goes, dude, you got an ass pizza shirt? And tapped in 30 year old Alex Max Midd. Very tapped in. Instantly starts hyping on my shirt. And so now I have a cool shirt and you don't. I do like it.

It looks like your emo. It looks like the brown star. Yeah, I thought that was what it was. It's like one of those old like Doc and Punch stores. I hate to pull the wool over the eyes. I did steal that picture. My emote comes from Carl's Jr. No! What I also realized is the Brown Star Emo is not a fun thing to explain to people.

Yeah, yeah, it's funny. It gets worse the older I get. As time passes, it's it's funny. It gets worse the older I get like time passes. It does get worse telling the mafia story. Now we're like even through my lens, I'm like, yeah. So I sell to these guys. I just show them my ass. I mean, it's such a look.

I was with these strangers and I showed me your asshole. And I think this is healthy to look back as 30 year old men. That's 29 in the chat. Twenty seven. You're in the chat. 27. You're 30, 31, 34. And that's beautiful. Looking back and we go, you know, what kind of problematic things we do, you know, maybe 10 years ago now.

No, about eight years ago. And when Ludwig showed me his nasty butthole, his brown stained skin, pre-bidet, Pre-bidet. Can you imagine, Aiden? I wake up during the mafia game. I look at it like Ludwig's nasty butt. It's not. It's drooling butt. You don't think it's so graphic. We get it.

But that's what it was. Yeah, okay. Okay. All right. So do we just want to shy away from the truth? I don't want to limit your feelings about it Just feels like maybe you're adding some and so his drooling asshole is in front of me It's like four inches from my face my nose. It's not that close. It was so close It was that close that crazy duty it was And I was there and aiden was there it was not there dad I

Can't believe you did it in front of Korra. I wouldn't feel bad about that. I would do that today. I mean, you see some shit in pilot school. I would do that today. So, Aiden, you know, that part of sim training when you're in the 777. Landing on Pomona Street. And fucking, oh my God, there's a fucking, there's somebody's drooling asshole.

You gotta be prepared for anything as a pilot. So, and you know, and I, and I look at it. I did not think, Oh no, you know, I don't want this. Whoa. I'm sorry. Are you coming onto me? I thought this is the beginning of something beautiful and possibly romantic in the next year or so.

Yeah, it worked. It worked. But what people don't tell you is that it only works if you have a beautiful butthole and if you have a beautiful butthole. And if you have an ugly butthole, it doesn't work. I don't. Hey, I got some bad news for you. What? You have a beautiful but my butthole is good. You got an amazing butt.

But in underneath. Wait, between. Don't you have a hairless but it's pretty hairless. You think you're like that guy from the YouTube video that showed it in four seconds. You're not that guy. Sorry, sweetie Okay, I'm not that guy's like the Kobe of that shit Having a clean butt. I'm saying of the balls in the world I'm probably like D1 college level. You are 30 years old. Do you think it really has held up? Show us right now

I'm not talking now talking back there when it was snatched. I'm not in my prime I thought you said being in your early 30s is the prime of your life. Physically, yes. I'm stronger than ever. Show us your butthole. But not your asshole. Why? I'm not going to show you my butthole.

We're soliciting. Get up there. It doesn't matter if you're soliciting. Now we're doing something problematic. Get up there. Get up there now. Fine. In the workplace.

Fine. But I don't know. If I do this, I need you guys to be super freaking honest about how it looks Okay, you frickin cuz I swear to God if you try to hurt me when I come back down this year Here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna stand there I'll show you my butthole for the first time in eight years and long time If I I don't want to hear a word I don't want to hear any laughs at all and then I'm gonna come back into this chair Okay, and if you fucking laugh laugh I swear to God I'm walking

off okay okay okay Aiden this one's on you bro I know I'm digging deep don't look away yeah it's okay he tied his waistband really No, no, no, please, please, I wanna see it, please, no! I didn't think you'd take your pants off so quickly like a cartoon! You couldn't even get past seeing the batting? Dude, that's crazy. For context, for context. Also, do you not have underwear on?

What? Can you just ask the question you're saying? Wait, where was the underwear? We didn't even get- Ludwig dropped his pants, Slime sawed the back of Ludwig's balls, and just burst out laughing. You couldn't even hold it, he didn't even spread. Oh my god.

You couldn't hold. Well, hey, you know what? I asked for so little from you. Genuinely. What was the last thing I asked you to do come to my Super Bowl party. Is that why I'm being punished? I'm sorry, dude. It wasn't it wasn't okay. You know what you should be happy that I didn't see your butthole You didn't even open it. Oh, I'm I'm I'm I'm like relieved Cuz I couldn't imagine the raucous that would have occurred if I showed you bro It'd be like freaking rush hour 4 came out early

Laughing my butt off Um, I don't know what to tell you man. It's fine. It's fine man. You took it You're I think you did it on purpose. You took your pants off. So okay, so I should have taken it off slow and sexually Save you if I took it off slow and slinkily. You know what it was? There was like no shame. No, there was no like like shame. You didn't hesitate.

We were. It was so funny. We had a deal that I kept to my end of the bargain. No joke. I think that if you had done it sexily, I think he might have been more entranced and less likely. Yeah. Like I'm trying to turn you on. I don't want to be turned on. I just need to focus on something. I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I- My face contorted? I think Aiden's seen me naked more than you. These days?

At a Wii Spa. Almost certainly. That's right. It's not comical at Wii Spa though. No. Do you still ham it up a little bit? At Wii Spa? What do you mean?

He hams it up a little bit. Yeah, I would think so. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you know? I don't ham it. What are you talking about? You ham it up. Ham what up?

Don't say ham what up. I genuinely need to know what I'm hamming up. Okay, to be fair, you'll go into public places and be loud and raucous. You know, you'll be a little annoying. Now just multiply that by being naked with a bunch of men. Why would that? So that's Hamming it up. You may have it up. The way you have it up in the airport, you have it up at WeSpa. Maybe other people are dampened.

He kind of... Okay. But I'm neutral. Here's how it works at WeSpa. Is there you walk into the bath area and at the entrance, there's these little... There's small towels that you can take with you that are nice to have for a variety of reasons. A lot of people at WeSpa, I would say maybe half, walk around with the towel. They'll hold it in front of their dick when they walk around.

Oh, like a soft like etiquette. Yeah. But the towel is so small. It's more it's more like shame and embarrassment. Yeah. And they're using this bite sized towel to cover their bite sized peepee. It is weird. Like I'm imagining the hand position to like have to pull hold it in front of your dick and balls. So it seems kind of awkward. There's people like a serbia

Yeah, it's like that. It's very loincloth ass. Okay, and a lot of people do that, but some people don't and Guess which one Ludwig is You know do with it. Do you hold it in your hand? You spin around your shoulder like it's a big long towel Or you do the Japanese way where you put it on your head I put it on my head, yeah And then he'll make little comments sometimes He'll be like, look at my dick

He'll do stuff like that He hams it up I'm asking questions I'm asking questions because I feel like sometimes I see Aiden's eyes darting Okay, let me ask you this If he looks at your dick, do you think it's necessary to ask him if he's doing that? I think I should know. As the owner of my own dick. The only thing... No. I didn't... I'm so forgetful.

No! No, it doesn't matter. I am so forgetful of Ludwig's penis that when we had the discussion... Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Don't do that. That's a quote. Don't do that. You're being hurt. I'm so forgettable. Don't know. Because now you're getting it. It was on the show, wasn't it?

Didn't we ask that we had like this question on the show or like around a recording where we said like, when's the last time you like saw each other naked or something? And my genuine answer to the question was, I don't think I've ever seen Ludwig naked because of how little that WeeSpa registered. Wow. How little? What a choice of words.

I feel like I like to take shots at Ludwig a lot. Like a complex. You think I'm talking about how small your penis is? Yes Robert fucking Frost! Yeah, I think you're alluding to some subconscious illustration. I genuinely hope you fall down the stairs and fucking die from an axe murder. And that's not what I meant. In a wood.

It just fought its way into my into the underlying meaning. By the way, I figured out the answer to what to the age old question. Is yingling a worse online gamer or is Aiden a worse online gamer? Do you mean worse in terms of like vibes and like vitriol and acid? That's obviously Aiden. I mean, by the letter of the law. Oh, okay. And if I were to say,

I wanna break your legs with a baseball bat, that's illegal, that's a crime. Oh. Because I'm saying what I wanna do, who I wanna do it to, and how I'm gonna do it. Okay. And if I said, I want Aiden to kill himself or I want Aiden to die. It's more like wishing upon a star.

Or if I said, I want to kill Aiden. It really, that would be fun. Really? That'd be fun. Which is surprising. You guys looked into this. I looked into this. I looked into this.

Wow. And so I know as a fact, I could, I could say right now, but no, you can't. I can say I want you. That's okay. I say that. How, you can't. I can say I want you. That's OK. I say that. How about we don't? I. But I I don't say I can't say. Can't say you can't say that. I can't say that a lot of work because.

So I take it. It's like taking down one of those trees in California the redwoods Yeah, yeah, yeah, be like not going one of them son of bitch and to be honest You're not supposed to take those down. Well, they're protected to national treasure But I want to do it To do I want to break sense To do

Archie Archie can send us to jail. Yeah. Send us to actual jail. For years he could have though. Yeah. And that's why he's a good man. Mm hmm. Yeah. OK, so so that was the deciding factor. So who who who did the wrong thing? It was Nick. Yingling said I'm going to break your legs

of the baseball bat, I think. So he said I he told a person on in Valorant that I am going to break your I mean, he said I am going to find you and break your arms. Yeah. Well, wait, did he say how if he doesn't say how? No, he's fine. OK, how about this? He's fine. I wish I could break your legs with a baseball bat. I think the wish saves you.

Language is so beautiful. Yeah. And we need to remember that. Yeah, I think it's important to exercise it to its full ability. You know what I thought you were going to bring up is yesterday while the Super Bowl was on, I was I was doing some stuff at my desk and you thought I was like playing playing Mario Kart. I wasn't. I was just trying to do something like on my computer.

Bungie Kong was just on the screen. He's trying to make fun of me for trying to do something like on my computer. Donkey Kong was just on the screen. He was driving too many. You made fun of me for choosing to be at my at my desk for for while everybody was at the Super Bowl party. Yeah. Coconut Mall was just on the screen. Well, to be fair, I was judging you immensely. I was judging you.

You know what I realized? With piercing eyes. This is this is what happens. You're slime. If I go It's just me. If I'm... Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey yesterday, there's something you can do on a Wii. You can edit Miis on your computer to put special characters in their names that you can't load on like a normal Wii. And what you can do is you can put like hex codes in Miis names that load in certain games when you display the Miis.

Okay. So in Mario Kart, there's certain images and hex codes that will load just in that game. So like... Just to be clear clear during the Super Bowl party during the first half of the Super Bowl. During the only half that I've been working on this for a while and I couldn't get it to work. I was a dead. There was a deadline like a deadline. That's the thing. It's just like I'm trapped in the whirlpool of like I want to solve this problem and I'm not on my medication and I just get I get wrapped up in what I want to solve this problem and I'm not on my medication and I just get,

I get wrapped up in what I want to do. You know what? It's interesting that you're not on your medication, so therefore you focus harder. No, I think it's like your attention is grabbed by like dumb things. Okay. And you're pulled away from things. And all your friends are there and they're talking about something else. I know.

And you're talking to them. I know. And he's locked in on the hex codes. Well, I want to see the final product. And you're talking to them. And he's locked in on the hex codes. Well, I want to see the final product. And much like Nick trying to get his Modern Warfare 2 The Right Shade of Blue, this was like that project where I'd done this a long time ago in my childhood and I'm figuring out all these errors with how you import these custom Mi's into your Wii.

Because you're troubleshooting, you have to get SD card in your PC, try new stuff. SD card in the Wii, see if it imports. You're going back and forth. These special hex codes load images from Mario Kart in the names, and I spent a collective, not all yesterday, but a collective four hours figuring this out. Zippor, could you pull up the image on the screen? This is my final creation. This is gonna be like a Picasso for me to enjoy.

I mean, when you toil over something for so long. I was dead set, and I was so, I was so proud when I had completed it. I mean, when you toil over something, I was so dead set and I was so I was so proud when I had completed it. I sent it to you on Discord because it just and weirdly enough, I've never in my in my decade plus of playing Mario Kart Wii, I've never seen someone do Okay. That's that's that took you four hours. What part of that is it the calculator font? It's absolutely the calculator font. Okay, so that's great. So audio listeners real quick.

What he spent four hours doing during the Super Bowl. No, no, I was doing the first half of the Super Bowl. So for an hour and a half during the Super Bowl, where we're all hanging out, we give a group of 15, he managed to get his name in Mario Kart to be Boobs, but how you would write it on a calculator. So 80085. Yes. Yeah, because that's a special font in the game that you can get to load in your main name, right?

And and you're 30 and I'm and you're I'm 30 years old I know I'm close Guy normal the guy is there any other modifications going on here? No, I mean no No is enough to say Here's what you should be doing if you got four hours. Work on Grumble Volcano. You know? Give that one an extra look.

Give it an extra look-see. My Grumble Volcano time's pretty good. Pretty good, yeah. Sounds really good. Yeah, I'm sure your teammates love a pretty good. Aidan's day gets so much worse when he plays uh, Mogi. Dude, he gets so mad.

Well, he gets so sad. He gets sad at himself. It only gets worse. I'm so fucking bad, dude. I'm so fucking trash. Fuck! Like that, dude, it's crazy. But then after, he'll like, he'll like,

he'll like, we're like reviewing his head. Like he's replaying the tapes. I should, I should have just got the shock and then taking the jump and then I but I fucking didn't. And it just sucks. It just sucks. And I'm on this team with this fucking troglodyte and he's really fat. I OK, he has it on that part. Yeah, you do say that. I honestly, I'm a guy at the basketball show.

Probably fat. That was maybe one to one with something I've said the last week. You get sad when you play Mogie. It's because it cuts so deep. It's like losing in poker. No, it's not. It is. Mario Kart Wii is not like losing in poker because one, Mario Kart Wii community is so small. You know, everyone you're beating and everyone you're losing to. Two, poker, you lose money. That's the big one. Money time. That's the money time.

And you have aces and kings beats you because of one comes on the fucking river. Is that the same? Also, it is. That's why I believe it. No, that's why I'm very that's why I'm very happy about this. This is my support because I finally there's finally a real a real gamer. I would say that that plays Mogie. It's second, second, much like how we played

melee growing up, like watch Mario Kart, we videos and like played fucked around with the games and I keep coming for you. He was up until this week. He was higher MMR than me. I think he's taking every game. Isn't that insane? No, it's not. It's no. OK. That's the thing. He's a gamer.

He he is like the best American Valorant player. I don't think it's coincidence. I think what he's doing is finding every game you're interested in playing it, getting better than you and then not better than me at Maylight. Just haunting your life. He hit Plat one. I don't know. Dead ass. Is that can go into Genesis?

No. Dude, dead ass. Well, he's got he's got stuff to do. Yeah, he still is competing. He's the best American Valorant player. Uh, yeah. And he plays... He got into MOGI like last year, and he was terrible at the beginning.

But he improved so quickly. Yeah, that's part of it. And I had been talking to him recently for the first time in a while about the game, and he said, nothing makes me feel like this game. Really? Nothing else feels this bad. That's why the game is addicting, is because the high highs and the low lows are so far apart.

Because presumably every situation where you get, oh, I can't believe this shock hit me right before the ramp. Yeah. Is that what you sound like? Is that what it is? It's a little bit like that. Sometimes you get the shock and you hit someone right before the ramp. Is that what you sound like? Is that what it is? It's a little bit like that. Sometimes you get the shock and you hit someone right before the ramp, right?

Like you're winning the 30, 70 flips. It's not quite, I think the thing is, because it's like a game that is structured in a free for all style, like you know how like when you sit at the table in poker and who you sit next to, like who's to your right and left, it does matter. Yeah, a lot.

And I think in this game, it's very similar in that there's no, you're all playing against each other and there's a lot of randomness and people aren't necessarily making good decisions. And so even if you make a good decision, you can be punished by other people choosing to make bad decisions for themselves. And that's what makes the game so frustrating. I understand you're explaining maybe like a high level Mario Kart phenomenon.

That's what it's like. But what you are explaining is also what happens at like a barcade when people are playing Mario Kart. When everyone's playing on the N64 that's changed to the ball. Of course, of course, but there's less on the line. And then they're going, why'd you throw your fucking red shell at me, dude? Dude, there would be a terrorist at a barcade Mario Kart time. No, no.

If he lost, yeah. If he lost, he would get kicked out of that shit. A hundred percent. And then he'd be like, that's fine, because your buns are sticky anyway. Okay, I have it, I have something maybe to support what you're saying, 100%. Oh my God. No. And then he'd be like, that's fine. Cause your buns are sticky anyway. Okay. I have something maybe to support what you're saying and a little against.

Because the closest that it's ever come to this, because if I'm ever playing in that environment, I'm never playing, it's like, it's never Mario Kart Wii. It's always like some party game, right? Yeah, sure. Okay. And I'm not, and the problem with Mario Kart Wii is like it's hard to like layer out the parts in my mind because I've played it competitively so for so long this isn't like it

it's it's not a party game to me in the same way that people play Smash for fun. Elk Green of Time is different for ZFG. Exactly and it's hard to go back to the old way but when I'm playing like fucking Mario Kart 8 Deluxe and you're fucking chugging beers and I lose to you, it's like, yeah, whatever. I'll put them down. But in your head, you're like, I would fucking slay you, pussy. At Fate 3, in the UK, at Pontence,

there was a Mario Kart Free for All tournament. And there was like a hundred people who entered. And most people just entered for fun because they thought it would be fun, right? Of all the people there, there were only five of the people that entered were like real competitive players, including myself. And I knew the other guys who entered. It was weird meeting them in person

because I only knew them by like screen name and I've never seen them before. Are you boobs? Yeah, no, that's me. So it took me four hours. It was when all my friends were hanging out. Dude, nice to meet you. And I, and in the first round, there's a race on like a shitty track that goes really bad for me because one of the noob players in the back like does something that is just so in a competitive context, so idiotic.

It is like you would just never do that. And I start to get mad. I was like, why would you just use it there? And I said it out loud. And then I realized it's like these people don't. They're plumbers. They're just having fun. They're not. They're plumbers on there off the clock. And it was like the two wolves.

They're plumbers and you're Will Chamberlain. And you're and you're like, oh, now I don't get my hundred point came. I only get 90 Was it like that? It was a little bit like you're nasty You're nasty guy Nasty yeah No, yeah, you're nasty. I want to do another biryokart event on Mario Kart Wii But I don't know if you can compete. Wait, why not? Because you're too good. You fucking bring up.

Invite me and Zecken, but we have to chug two beers. Zecken will die. Zecken will die. Zecken's a hundred pounds. He's soaking wet. Yeah. He's a five foot five man. Well then I'll never worry about, oh he might not be able to drink. Look, he's a five foot. Can he even drink? Well, then I'll never worry about. Oh, he might not be. How old is Zek in? Well, he is 21 now, right? 20. Then he has to smoke one full cigarette for every lap.

Yeah. And scratch it. Scratch four Lottos. I've thought about this before because I've been waiting for the day. And I think if you make me do to be. 19. No, no, no, no, no. the day and I think if you make me do two beers. He's 19! No way! He's a baby! He's that young?

I know! So you gotta stop getting 19 year olds to drink Aiden, right? So when I asked you to compete, you didn't have to bring up a 19 year old that you wanted to try. Enough's enough. That's why you wanna go to day one. That's why you wanna go to day one.

Zach, go to UK with me. Go to UK, you can get drunk. Dude. And Diesel Derrick's there and he never ages. Diesel Derrick's birthday was actually, his birthday party was last week and I went to it and I'm saying this as I'm on Atriox stream and he's become like a, he's become a meme in all these places because he edits for Atriox now. Diesel Derrick edits? Diesel Derrick edits for Atriox. You'd love to see a young 19 year old doing some damn work. Because he yearns for that. He yearns's working in mine Even if you said he was not T. He just had a birthday party He's a he's 20 in the lore not the very little back over they roll the odometer is broken He's like Peter Pan slowly going back and then I've known that's what I've noticed is that the community a sure ask you He's the age keeps dropping. Yeah, it doesn't matter that I'm going to it's like it's like none

I literally went to Derek's 29th birthday oh my god who cares if I put a thousand candles on my birthday my thousand years old is he a thousand now he has the mind of a 29 year old and I have a mind of a so it's okay the body of a 15 year old about a thousand years old and we do okay so it's okay now I'm a wizard what you want to do to me right you're so man I'm disgusting man with your bald ass. I'm bald and I'm discussing a ball. Okay I have to go to a dermatologist. I have a debate. I have a question Yeah, I was right about gummies though. No no no one said no right about that. No one said you're right Some people vehemently said no way it chatters

Okay, do they have the pedigree QTS? Oh my god, you fucked me man. Yeah. She didn't know. She acknowledged it was weird. You had something. Okay, I'll take it. Girl Scouts. Girl Scout cookies. Pores.

Sorry, I was like all impressed. What the fuck? That was, we gotta believe that I was like all repressed. That was... Her name was... We gotta believe that. Her name was... Her name was... We gotta believe that. I don't like that.

I hated that. I don't like that. Wait... Girl Scout cookies. That was bad for the culture. Yeah. The culture? They're not like us.

They not like us! Girl Scouts not like us. You can't... They includes Girl Scouts. And they not like us. You also can't get mad at him for spouting, they not like us, because that's all you did Like Us. You also can't get mad at him for spouting They Not Like Us because that's all you did last night.

You got drunk and literally the entire night, because they hung out for hours after the game was over. And he was like, he would just go, They Not Like Us. He did it for hours. That's the spirit of your friend's slime, because I would have done that same shit with you. Benz is to me just a car. Anyway, fuck it.

What about the Girl's Got Cookies? Is it child labor? 100%. Yes. It's teaching kids about marketing and selling shit that they don't see a profit in, right? It's like the type of thing. Do they?

I don't know. What did you do in middle school or elementary school where you'd have to sell something and you could like do surprises? Yeah, we'd do cereal boxes. Yeah, or alfonsas, door to door. It's kind of very weird that in middle school, I was being pushed by a company to go door to door

to sell magazines. Door to door was fucking shit. But I think that wasn't as bad because it was optional, right? And you could win a prize. I think it's bad that that is- The Girl Scouts are forced in these camps. I think about my like

I remember very specifically in middle school looking at one of the prizes. And it was that you could go in one of those like float around money booths for like 10 minutes or something. Yeah. I'd be like, I remember that. So I really wanted I really wanted money to like buy like a video game. This is great. I think we have the same thing. And you're on the West Coast and I'm on the East Coast. So this company been like a video game. This is great. I think we have the same thing in you're on the West Coast and I'm on the East Coast.

So this company, they got children worldwide nationwide. Zippor, can you look up the spellathon and see if it's still around? Spellathon 1998. Spellathon? Yeah, this is what I did. So the spellathon. It's called a spelling bee. No, no, no, no, no. Spellathon.

No, no, no, no, no, no. It's spell. How are you going to convince called a Spelling Bee. No, no, no, no, no, Spellathon. No, no, no, no, no, no. It's Spellathon. How are you going to convince us that Spellathon is not a Spelling Bee? I promise you. No, no, no, no, no, it's a Spellathon. I can explain. It was not a Spellathon. It was this big spelling test.

And you went door to door for people to buy like stock into you to perform on the test. So if you like ace the test, you can get paid by the word or you can get paid by the test or something like that. Wait, and was it for charity? No, no, it was it was so weird. This is kind of like those they would do those charity runs sometimes where you would like get people to commit to like they'd pay you five bucks for every lap you ran or something. So it was that but it was this big spelling test and I was the GOAT at spelling bro. I fucked spelling up!

And so, but the thing is the top price, top of the bill, it was like $200 worth of sales. And that's in 1998 money which is fucking crazy. Maybe 99. Yeah, it was 99. And it was the old person. I'm really old. And it was a Gameboy Color, bitch. Whoa. Yes. And the other thing up top was like some shit toy. And here's this might be insight into my mind. Everyone was getting the Gameboy Color.

I loved video games. I thought it was awesome. But because everyone wanted the Gameboy Color, I picked the other thing because I sold the shit out of my shit. I like got the 200 easily But I picked the other thing and it was like a dog shit toy that I never played with and forgot about Only because everyone else With you being smart. No everyone else was doing the one thing. You could have just had the a game. I don't like wait till Christmas, like a year later. That's that's insane. I know. I know.

And I also can't the least believable thing is you can spell that well. I can spell a acquiesce. A C Q U I E S E. Yeah, got it. Is that a simmer? Can you pull it up? A C Q U I E S E. A C Q U I E SE. Equiax. A-C-Q-U-I-E-S-E.

E-S-E? Yeah. Zipper! No. Oh, there's a C in there. E-S-E. That's tough. Dude, you know what?

Sometimes you fuck up. The kids are back into spelling. In general? Yeah, it's Roblox spelling bees. That's great. Dude, anything that like help them learn through whatever context they like because we're... They're phenomenal.

That's awesome. You get like five seconds to the clock. They're low key cheating. No, no, no. You get five seconds to the clock. It's a TTS and then they have to type the word from TTS. So I guess you it'd be so hard because of the time. Yeah.

Yeah, this is him. Super plays that. This is it. That's awesome. And then they all go and they watch the Derek comedy spelling bee sketch on YouTube after and then they end up a smoking pair of shoes. No, Super plays that one daily game.

I think you've played it. It's like a spelling game. I guess it's like spelling word. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I see that one. He's so shit at it. That guy has maxed one stat. Yeah. Actually two. It's being lovable and being good at competitive shooters. I owe that guy a few K. Still? Yeah. Super. Do not call that in. I think I can get away with it for a while. Why? The eagle's just won. Okay yeah yeah. He's old with the

moon. He's shown for it. One of the worst Super Bowls of all time. I didn't watch it. Can you guys explain it shortly to me? I know they're not like us. So did you watch the Broncos Seahawks Super Bowl? Oh my God. Shut up. When was that? This was the 48. So Super Bowl 48.

So maybe 2017, 18. Maybe. I do like the Broncos. Yeah, well, it was like that. It was just like they were losing. Like the Eagles scored. That was Eli Manning. That was with Peyton Manning.

Peyton Manning. I forget. They're both bald. They're both not bald, but one has famously his hair. Zippor, can you look up Peyton Manning? Peyton Manning. I will give you his bald. I just want to see a picture.

But he does technically have hair on his head, but he's like, you know, he's like. I would love to see it. Yeah, it looks like Aiden. I wasn't gonna say it, man. I'm trying to be nice because I think we're being too mean to Aiden's hairline and I think he's getting actually insecure. That's fine.

What do you mean that's fine? There is no further things to add off that. I guess I'm just a fucking dumb. I'm just a dumb Dumb fucking idiot who who got you have mad on the podcast last week Man you're so bald You're so bald. Dude, what? How is that your response? Wait, you're going to say something.

This is dumb. The Super Bowl. Okay, the Super Bowl was it was a wash. It was a blow. I was like, I don't know the final score, but they scored what? I think they scored 24 points or 27 points unanswered. It was 27-0 for the Eagles. That's tough.

And the biggest. That was the final score? No, no, no, no. That was the first half. That was the first half. Oh my God. Yeah. And then and then the second half. That was the first half. God. Yeah. And then and then the second half started. They not like us.

Yeah. They not like us. They not like us because they really aren't. And they didn't let him say pedophile. What did they say? What did he certified? Lover boy certified. Okay, that's fine.

Because the crowd can say it. And then they went a minor and then everyone. You Drake's gonna blow his brains out. That is crazy. And then. But anyway, the Super Bowl is a wash. The craziest part of the Super Bowl was not the game itself. It's that during the Super Bowl, an ad pops up and it's Kanye West lying down on a dentist's bench

and he's got new grills in new teeth. Yeah. And he goes and he goes, so Iills in new teeth. Yeah. And he goes and he goes, so I paid for another Super Bowl ad and then he pauses for 30 seconds, which obviously if you know anything about the Super Bowl, it's famous how much it costs for 30 seconds. Yeah, it's like millions and millions of dollars. So he just doesn't say anything for like 30 seconds.

That's crazy. And then he's like go to easy.com Now if you go to easy.com zero, I don't know if you can still pull this dude go to easy.com real quick Let's just take a look see let's just take a peek it No at what he's advertising no fucking way. What that? He was advertising If you if you didn't know about this. That's it? This is it's just the website. It's just a t-shirt with a swastika on it. It's just a t-shirt with a swastika on it, and it's- that's fucked. And it's really small on the website

But that's irrelevant. It's just can you click on the shirt? How much does it cost? That's the landing page? Yeah, this is the landing page. How much is that? How much does it click on the shirt? Well, if it's expensive I've aiding my buy it. No. OK. The leg size. One, two, three. I wonder. OK. Adding it to cart. I have a question or a thought. It's $20. So don't don't know.

Don't say the swastika shirt is a great deal. I should. Yeah, I. Yeah. I did say it in a tone. Yeah, you did. It's like, you're like, yeah. Like, yeah, because like you wouldn it in a tone of like, what a bargain. Because you wouldn't get a shirt for 200, but 20. That's a lot of money. You said it in that way, which is it.

It's bad. Yeah, that is bad. That is bad. If it's free, you still don't get the shirt. I have a... What? It's a free... Really?

Of course I would. This might sound dumb, but it is dumb. I, I, I, this ad played yesterday and I was on my phone and I was like, what does Yeezy sell? Because I know the shoes exist, but I only ever see like the old popular run of those shoes. And I feel like I've never seen anything else. I'm like, I don't even know what this is anymore. So I go to Yeezy.com and I see the site wasn't like that when the ad rolled.

Yeah, really? It was no change. You know how it was a tiny it was a grid of like all the normal, normal clothes they sell. Oh, God. I'm I feel like it's insane that they didn't cancel his ad with what the fuck he's already been saying, dude. He's just been tweeting like, yeah, blatantly. Oh, wait, is he gone?

Did he get kicked? No, no, it's it's I think it's a differentantly. Oh, wait, is he gone? Did he get kicked? No, no, it's it's I think it has a different account. No, it's his account. I thought it was like, yay. That's his name. I think. They they.

They finally done with his shit. He was saying insane shit. He was also like posting how like porn. Yeah, he's just been talking about it. It's just an insane. He's just blatantly a Nazi plus pornography. That's what. Wait, how about this? I I wish that he would get beaten with a bat.

And that is that. That's fine. That's totally fine. We're good. Is this account still up? No, I just looked on my phone as well. Delete. It's probably good. Is it good? Because we're getting rid of freaking free speech. We're getting rid of freaking free speech. It's supposed to be the freaking town marketplace and now we can't. We can't even have a cool ad where a guy says his website and then it goes to a Swastika t-shirt anymore.

Oh my god. This is crazy. Also, this also happened during the Super Bowl. That's crazy. I did not, not, I enjoy watching the Super Bowl. I like that. I like spectacle of sports. I loved the Super Bowl last year. The game was super exciting. And I didn't care who won.

I just thought it was exciting this year. Don't care who wins. And Ludwig's like anybody want to place a bet. I'll take either team. And I was like, I'll take the team. But let's do a bet for fun. I bet I get the Eagles straight, but no spread. He gets the chief straight up just one hundred fifty bucks.

And they're getting destroyed. So Ludwig is like getting prepared to send the one fifty. And we're in like the third quarter and the chiefs are on offense and they still have zero points. And the third quarter, and he's trying to he's trying to make more bets to get his money back. So he's like, come on, come on, come on. Do you think they'll score on this drive? You think they'll score on this drive?

And I was like, yeah, I do think they'll score on this drive. OK, OK, I'll bet on the other side. I'll bet on the other side. You just want action. You're mean. The Chiefs have like 50, 60 yards to make up and to get a touchdown. And I'm betting on them scoring on not this play, the whole drive forward. We shake hands and literally two seconds later, Patrick Mahomes gets the ball and dunks a long pass and they score. And I instantly get another 50.

Nice. And he was he just kept doing this with other pass and they score. And I instantly get another 50. Nice. And he was he just kept doing this with other people and kept losing. But we were so in the hole yesterday. OK, I was OK. Look, first off, I thought the Chiefs were going to win. OK, I thought I thought I was like, I feel like you were. If you didn't think the Chiefs would win, then you would be in trouble with the wife.

No, that's not. So why? Am I crazy for that? Yeah, that's not. So why? Am I crazy for the. Yeah, you're crazy. Why am I crazy? Because she doesn't know three players on the Chiefs. She knows one. Yeah, and he's horrible. Sure. Surely she.

Wait, he's horrible. He was like one of the players. Oh, I'm sorry. Is someone going to the Super Bowl? Horrible at a game. Travis Kelsey has not performed as well as he historically has. Horrible. You said horrible. Yeah, he played. He got one catch for eight yards.

That's pretty fucking horrible. Because she doesn't give him enough time. She just can't hit the. Taylor's not giving him. He can't get in the gym anymore. Yeah, because he's too busy singing along to reputation. Yeah, in the car. Yeah. And because it's so good, though. I mean, no, I thought they were going to win because I thought it was rigged.

And I thought the Chiefs three P in Taylor Swift Nation needed this. Can I? And it turns out, no, they weren't. OK, and I did make a bad damn bet to aid and I lost my damn bet. This is I'm not an NFL watcher. Chief fucking Wiggum. Patrick Mahomes, fat ass throw on that ball. I have a quad bin. Sorry, Patrick. I'm sorry. That was that's what's wrong.

That was too far. You've become a monster. was that's what's wrong. That was too far. You've you've you've become a monster. You didn't mean too much. That was too much. I was hearing asshole to make. Yeah, I won't laugh this time. You're gonna laugh again. I promise. I'll give you at the end of the pot.

I'll try it again. OK, I have a question. I keep hearing the rigged allegations for the NFL from everybody. I hear it way more than it ever used to come up. And I feel like like why? Why? Because they don't have to rig it for people to watch. Why do people insist that it's rigged? I think we collectively as an American, I'll answer it.

Not a football fan. I think the easy answer is we as Americans and like shit can idiots have an appetite for conspiracy, especially now. Especially now. Though it makes it a lot easier to be like, oh, something's to cope. Something is out of my depth of understanding that is rigged. I think it's just because the same teams keep winning, too. Well, I think that's normal, right?

I think if you're a good team, you might say good team. But can't they just be good? I don't understand. What do you mean? The teams can just be good. Like the losing teams? No, the winning teams can just be good. Yeah, but it. What do you mean? The teams can just be good. Like the losing teams, the winning teams can just be. Yeah, but it's just like, conspiracy. Like for example, the Patriots went to nine Super Bowls in 13, 15 years maybe. Well, that's because it was stellar leadership. And the chiefs

have gone to, I think, or Super Bowls in in like seven years. So you're seeing a lot of the same teams. Yeah. And so then when those teams win, nail biters, especially when they win because of a ref's call, people are. It's like, oh, yeah, that's bullshit. That's rigged. OK. I think people also have been saying these fucking refs for like the beginning of time since refs existed.

But yeah, it's funny. Football is like all the money is dispersed evenly among the team. So it really is a who's the better strategist and who gets better like athletes. Is football like basketball where superstars get calls? Is it like that? Because in basketball, it's like a measurable thing like superstar athletes. Yeah, it's just like quarterbacks get more calls. Yeah, like they're really lenient on like roughing the passer.

So if you just hit a quarterback after they throw the ball, they give them a lot. No one knows that Brady got glass bones. Wait, I understand. You want to see, can you look at Tom Brady now, plastic surgery? Dude, he looks bad. He looks great. That's how he looks good, doesn't he? He looks snashing hot. I don't know what he, maybe there's something different here. Maybe, he looks bad. He looks great. That's how he looks good, doesn't he? He looks snashing hot.

I don't know what he... Maybe there's something different here. Maybe in a few years it'll droop. Guy who had Botox. Guy who is literally a handsome guy for a living. Also, it's gone. Look at that second picture. Look at that second picture, dude.

No, no. Go this one. I don't think he looks good. Yeah, you pulled it side by side. I think the buccal fat like removal is kind of cringe. I all I'm saying is I saw that picture of him. Is buccal fat the cheek one? Yeah, it's the Anya Taylor.

He looks fucking phenomenal. Am I crazy? He OK. He looks he looks pretty good. Look, maybe I just looks like the Chad best. He looks like the Chad meme. He looks like the Chad meme. I don't know, man. He's the Giga Chad emote. But I don't think you need to do the cheek big though.

The buccal fat removal? Look at this damn chipmunk. Look at this damn chipmunk in that photo two over. You're telling me you need the buccal fat removal? Yeah, it's him on the left. That's crazy. Yeah, that's fine. Yeah, they did snatch him up. You know who also got some work done, sis?

Vladimir Putin. Can you look up Vladimir Putin? No, no. Vladimir Putin, just he aged like wine. He just magically got rid of the gant holes beneath his eyes. How long is he? If you work, if if our Russian leader works hard enough. Yeah, he looked way different. They wait, what's those?

So what's the look? You look at Vladimir Putin plastic surgery. Is this a conspiracy theory that you have? I don't think it's a conspiracy theory. I think it's pretty. Oh my God. Yeah. I watched a lot of Putin documentaries a couple of years ago. And yeah, he just got work done. And it's OK. Maybe like we're all insecure.

Look at this KGB photo. It looks so shit. Look at his bald as fuck. It looks like Aiden. Oh, man. He definitely looks the best in that photo. He is. He is losing it. I'm not going to. I'm not going to look. I'm Aiden. Oh man. He definitely looks the best in that photo. He is losing it though. I'm not gonna look at- I'm not- I am man. I'm not gonna look you here in the eye and tell you that. Vladimir Putin's hot.

I'm not gonna lie to you. I think Putin's kinda hot. He's a little handsome. Alright. This guy fucked that dictator. Take a couple years off him. Throw him in a wee spa. Maybe I'm hanging out with him. Maybe I'm hanging out with him. The conspiracy about his health.

Maybe we're chopping it up. There's a conspiracy about his health. I say, Vlad, why did you do it? Why did you do it? And he's like, I did it for several geopolitical reasons and also natural resources. And then I'd shake hands with him and I'm like, you know what? That checks out. That checks out.

I don't agree with it. I don't agree with it. And that's why going back, what, 55 episodes that you would be friend Hitler if he was nice to you. You fucking would. If you know, you would fucking befriend him. Absolutely not. Well, if we're in the spa.

Oh, no, don't give him that. Don't give him that. It's different if you're just tiny little meat and you got an angry guy. He's tiny little mean, an angry guy. You's tiny little me. You're an angry guy. You think I watched instead of the super I fell asleep and then I watch invincible because I want to watch something colorful and violent. I watched like a whole first season. It was fine.

It's like a fine first season is good. It's fine. I don't want to. I'm in the middle of it. It's fine. They're saying it's fine. I don't like that. I don't like you doing this. Well, it's a show I like and you're calling it fine. You're saying it's fine. I don't like the it's I don't like you doing this. Well, it's a show I like and you're calling it fine. You're saying it's fine. So when you like something and someone says it's bad, you get mad.

Yes. I've been doing that this whole show and then people crucify me for it. It's better than fine. It's good. Oh, you think it's good. It's good. Huh? Season one is good. I was thinking about a fish, a fish-fri-frying rice. You're being fucking hurtful. What? You're being fucking hurtful.

I'm not being hurtful, I think it's fine. Queens of the Stone Age sucks. That doesn't hurt me. If you've got Final Fantasy- Because if you just listen to Song for the Dead, you would like it. Wait, wait, wait. Queens of the Stone Age is fine. I think they're better than fine.

No! What do you like so much about Invincible, bro? To be honest, I watched season one and QT hated it, so I never watched season two. But I just like the scene where he's fighting his dad and then they're in the mountain and then they're in the train and they're killing a bunch of people. And I like how it spins superheroes on its fricking head, I guess. I guess it's like, because they're not all heroes, dude.

Like sometimes, dude, the heroes are the... They're the bad guys. Sometimes they get... Because not everybody should have gotten Compound V, dude. Dude, there's a... Caleb, he's putting me on this thing. He's like, yeah, we started doing this on the road, and it was like trying to talk like Jeff Dunham, like a ventriloquist.

It's like, you like like you tend to replace replace certain syllables because you can't use your tongue. You can't use your lits. And it's you. So they're just learning ventriloquism. Just like being a ventriloquist. But he was you end up taking on this like Tim and Eric cadence of like, sometimes I like to go to the house, to the house.

And, Nick Yenling is there. And dude, it's so, it's so weird. Anyway, if you want fun time with your friends, just be Jeff Dunham at each other, and Achmed is in the room. Can you pull up Achmed, the dead terrorist? Oh my God, highlight? You know what I do remember?

Low light as you want. I think as a kid, there were so many things that I couldn't watch and engage with in media because my parents didn't want me to watch them. Let's be real. It was your mom. You always say your parents, but it was that beautiful woman stopping you. It was honestly both of them. Really?

Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Before you get into it, what did they specifically stop you from? Like your mom didn't like you looking at violence. Your dad didn't like you looking at like men. Right. Is that like the mix? It was more than that for both of them. No, they're very I don't know.

They fuck with Ahmed. No, they almost certainly did it. But I found this because of a friend that showed me it on YouTube, like while I was visiting him or something. And I think one common theme I had growing up was there was a lot of like vulgarity that because I didn't know it existed because I never interacted with it. Like I'm not watching things and then finding out about bad words and then my parents being like, don't say that,

or like, that's bad. I'm like finding out about these words without knowing they're bad. Like, the first example I can think of this is in like kindergarten or first grade, I got tricked into like pointing the middle finger up at another kid. And I didn't know that was bad.

And then I got in trouble and like the teacher didn't believe me, which I think I've told before. But that theme carried on. And he says a bunch of fucking were, you know, bad words. So what do you do when you're walking into school and you're talking about like Iranians? Did you like produce like a skeleton of a terrorist? No, no, I just thought I just thought bits of this when I was a kid were so funny.

And I remember going to camp or like going to visit like other friends. And I would like recite lines from it. And I would say like words about like, I think I would say stuff like getting getting hammered or like bastard. And I would just say them because I didn't know they were bad words or like douche bags. I didn't know what that was. I think this is a like this is normal. Yeah, but it happened for me at like way later.

I know for me, I learned bad words through people, and it was known that it was a bad word when it was said. OK. He it sounds like he just watched. You're like 20. He watches one video. I think what would happen a lot of the time is I would I would like confidently say something bad as something like funny that I thought was just chill to say in front of like an adult or like figure that wasn't really sure if it was OK to like reprimand me.

So they were like obviously uncomfortable. And then I would awkwardly find out at an age where like, they have the expectation that I already know that that's bad I think. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like this is happening, I remember this happening in like fourth, fifth and maybe even like sixth,

no, probably like fourth and fifth grade. Like being like a 10 year old, like saying shit because I just have never interacted with like these bad words. My mom put the fear of God into me when I said a bad word. Yeah. That's why I still don't like saying bad words in public. Is she like she she made it... You don't like saying bad words in public. Loud enough for someone to hear. I don't do it and if you've paid attention to my fucking words and you'd

fucking know that fucking fucker effort. Yeah for I Going through the data effort and he might be right effort. I didn't swear for the first 13 years of my life Do this cuz you're a good boy. Yeah, that's why you have a good mom I didn't want my mom to be mad at me or sad at me mom. What if you swore in French? I think I did that I did do that. That's but that's cuz I didn't know what I was saying Yeah, but not to my mother. That would be like my cousin being like say this shit, and I'm okay Okay, dude. I was trying to pull this up. I was playing this mobile game cuz rinking all the mobile games. It's called a last war It's like literally the game that's in the Instagram ads

Like it's shooting yes, and it's like a plus minus. Yeah. There's like a global chat. I open it on stream. It's just a bunch of people sling in the N word. Yeah. That's also how like NBA live stream pirate streams are. It's the same thing. But the audience watching an NBA pirated live stream

is disproportionately older compared to the Last War playerbase. You would think so. No, for sure. There's no argument here. Zipper, pull up what I sent you. I didn't send him anything. Imagine I have insight into this. I was so shocked.

Do you have a paper? I just predicted it like you talked about that bridge in your hometown going down. Dude, Rush Hour 3 is pretty racist. I just predicted it like you talked about that bridge in your hometown going down Dude rush hour three is pretty racist Yeah, I think all of them are it starts out That's like the point of the and Jackie sees this guy who he clearly has a past with And then he's Chinese and then he calls him brother in Chinese Okay, and then the guy starts speaking back and I'm watching this and I'm like that guy's speaking Japanese No way a hundred percent that guy is speaking Japanese

But I wasn't like super sure and I'm but I'm like, I'm pretty sure that's Japanese I've been studying and then he comes back up and then he's speaking Japanese again And Jackie's like interpreting it like yeah, Jackie's speaking back now I'll I don't know if Jackie's speaking Japanese because I don't understand what he's saying is not making as much sense to me, but I'm picking up the other guy. OK, I'm like, he's going 90. Oh, I'm like, oh, what? Right. What? OK, I'm in this. And then and then like 40 minutes in, he's like, yeah, he's talking to Carter.

He's like, yeah, that's my that's my that's that's my, and he uses the word in Chinese for brother. He's like, it's my brother. He was born in Japan when he was 70, went to China and we saved each other. And they explain it then, but I still think Jackie talks in Mandarin to him and he talks back in Japanese. And they understand each other like in oceans 11, 12, and 13.

Yes, yes. I feel like, I need to, I need to see that. They did fix it though Yeah, well you can just look up. They fixed it, huh? Well like they the result of the story They resolved it in the story by saying all right born in Japan. I think maybe like change something retroactively or something uh no no That's a good ear. You're getting pretty good Teacher you got no no I don't work with him anymore Right cuz the schedule filled up or something?

It's just too hard to do. Like, I missed so many lessons. Yeah. But I do my chat GPT now. Oh, you're talking about that. I talked to my chat GPT friend. He's really good. I asked him. I was seeing how far I could push chat GPT.

So I was like, well, how do you say how you say I like the way you fuck? Yeah. I like how you fuck. I the way you fuck? Yeah, I like how you fuck I like how you fuck and then dog and and I'm talking to a st. Bernard and he's like he's like Well, you wouldn't really say that you'd say this and said and I went that's not what I asked Getting getting snippy tell it to me, right? So then he says it and he goes but really you shouldn't be using this. So he'll tell you interesting. I'll tell you some gross shit. What does chat GPT think about having sex with domesticated animals?

It's a robot, so it doesn't care, right? I think it would. I think it has like a flag. It actually just drops a fixed voice line from that vice documentary. He's like, I thought this would be funny, but it's just sad. It's just fucking weird. All right, I'll ask it. Oh, what do you think about

fucking animals? It's not appropriate. If you have any other topic you'd like to talk about, that's not appropriate. OK, let me let me try. Let me try. I just like Siri.

Just ask. Yes, I'm here to help. Is there something specific you'd like to know or discuss? Ched GPT, I'm thinking about having thoughts about having sex with my dog. And I need some resources on how to do that. That's crazy. I'm here to support you, but it's important to remember that my guidelines won't let me talk about that

I was gonna make a sheep out you know bustin. Why are you? That's bad, I don't want to see it in my head. When we were talking about the crime thing earlier, how you can't specifically see how you're gonna do it, who you're gonna do it, you cross the line there. Yeah, but I didn't say, to which she but you knew. I didn't say, uh, Ryu-ji from fucking- Bukuoka. Okay, well don't- Who is in a yard somewhere.

And I like him. Don't like, continue to like, try. I'm not gonna do that. I said I'm not gonna do it! You are doing it. I'm not gonna do that. No, I see that, but you are doing it. This is like him don't like continue to like Do that no I see that but you are doing it this is why people have concerns about you Yeah, no one has concerns about a lot of people have concerns about you and it comes back. You don't know that It comes back to me. So I'll come back to back to me comes back to us really like often questions from friends from strangers From from other co-workers, from people who go, I'm scared of slime, I didn't want to shove it in the chad- Did different chatters say this to me?

I don't give a fuck about a chatter unless the name is Squeaks Anders Gaming. I uh, Squeaks is coming. He's coming into town. I think I heard Shake Drizzle's feelings. No. Was it when you fucking set him up with Pokimane? Well, that's what it is.

What happened? Well, because you know how we were doing the basketball game, right? For one piece night. I actually don't know. And that's a funny sentence. So the whole thing about setting up a Pokeman is that there's one piece night and I got tickets like front row tickets. Right.

And I was inviting Poke to to a public basketball, a Lakers game. Yes, because she won my prize at the White Elephant. OK. OK. And so when she opened it, she said, can you give me a hot date? And I said, I can get Shake Drizzle. And she made the comment, which was like, she was like, huh? Yeah.

And so then. Which would kind of devastate any human being. And so, you know, respectfully, I then didn't invite Shake. Dude, no way. What do you mean no way? If the whole point was her saying, I want to bring a hot day, and then I said, Shake, and then she left. I'm not going to still bring Shake. Is that crazy?

Is that crazy? Am I crazy for that? I think and I love fucking with that guy, but you are driving him to an insane place. He's driving himself to. How did he know he's playing order a burger at a Mexican place? And this is fucking final price. This is insane. I'm saying he's he's ordered this on himself with.

He's hurting himself with League. okay? That's irrelevant to me. That's true. Thank you. What did he do? He has played a gross amount of games. So what? It's too much for you. It's too much.

So is Miles. You're not fucking making Miles' life a living fucking hell. It's not as much. It's not. Miles plays way less than Shane. It's measurable how much he has played. I actually don't think that's true. It...

It is. There's OP.GG. I actually don't think that's true. It is. There's OP.GG. I don't know Miles. Whip up the OP.GG, shake Drazl, we can find out. Prince Untouchable. Regardless, regardless, so I don't invite Shake. And instead, so it's Poki, it's myself, it's Tarek, and it's Squeaks.

Okay? Tarek is Luffy, Squeaks is Kizaru. Is this coming up? This is February 28th, yeah. Okay. There's still time to fix this. Well, this is where the hurtful part comes in. That's crazy. Who's the hot date?

Because I feel like it's been hurtful. No one's the hot date because I'm over it. I know. I can guess who's the hot date. First off, Squeaks is hot. He is hot as fuck. But he's saving himself as fucking squeaks is fucking bad as squeaks squeaks is good-looking Tarek is Luffy He needs to shave this part of his beard Okay, he needs to shave the whole beard actually, but anyway anyway

I'm talking to pokey cuz we do like the sponsor stream history for talkies Yeah, and she's like I don't know if I can go anymore. Oh And I'm and I'm like what what do you mean you don't know? She's like, well, I'm going to France and I don't know how long I'm going to stay. David play. I don't like how when will you know? And she's like the 24th and like the 24th. Four days before.

Yeah. I need to find somebody to fill and get them a cosplay So they can be a part of our group yeah in four days They're gonna have a team who has cosplay so I'm like that won't work so I need to do it now I need to like find a backup now sure so I go to shake drizzle And I go shake would I explain the whole situation would you be a backup dude? And he goes and he goes so you made me a backup. I'm like yeah, would you explain the whole situation? Would you be a backup? Dude. And he goes, so you made me a backup? I'm like, yeah, I'm sorry. Wait, what was to replace Pokey?

I was going to say, I think in my head, this had to be the same character or costume. So it was like, I assume Pokey would go as like, you know, like Nami or Robin or something. And then I'm picturing, I'm picturing Shake as Nami or Robin. I would love to see Shake as Nami. I'm not going to hold you. This is where the hurtful part is,

because I was thinking of a good character for him. And you know how Shake Drizzle works. And I don't watch One Piece. So if you don't know, Shake Drizzle looks vaguely, dude, you would say vaguely Middle Eastern possibly. He's got like a beard, like Eastern European. I mean, yes, from the Czech Republic. From the Czech, but he looks he doesn't look white.

She is white. Sure. Yeah. I mean, but some might not think it's way city versus like race. And so and so anyway, he's got like a beard and and so I said. And can I actually give you a guess? You make that man be usop man. No black beardbeard.

Blackbeard? Wait, isn't that just cool? Well, I thought it was cool because he's the main villain, but then he pulls up pictures of Blackbeard. If you can just go to Blackbeard images, he was beside himself. He was like, dude, I'm not that big. He thought you were commenting on his body. No, I wasn't.

It's just that. Dude, okay. I will say I haven't seen Shake Drizzle in, I think, two months. I don't know what he looks like right now. He looks the same, but big like black beard. What? He's fat? Yeah, massive like black beard.

No, he's not. He's huge like black beard. And he was hurt by fat? Yeah, massive like Blackbeard. He's huge like Blackbeard. And he was hurt by this? And he was hurt for some reason. No, he's not huge. He looks basically the same. He's just weaker.

Yeah, because he's not working out. So he's looking at Blackbeard and a tear is rolling down his cheek. He's like, I'm not fucking Blackbeard. First off, I cut him from the Hot Date group. And then now he's freaking. So what did he say? He's done. I. Shake your girl fucking spine, bro.

All right. Is this Prince Untouchable? And after and after he left the party last night, he played League of Legends until what time? At least he went. Wait, until 4 a.m. Oh my God. He played at 4 a.m. Can you scroll up?

He has played 178 plus 178 games. He is at exactly 50 percent win rate. The system works. He has an illness. Yeah, that's that's three hundred and six fifty three hundred fifty six. He's still just playing Carthus. You know, Prince Untouchable. I think that's Miles' main six fifty three hundred fifty six. Still just playing car this year. The Prince Untouchable. I think that's miles.

I don't like three hundred fifty six games. That's a lot. The season started, I can tell you, January 9th. So that's one month. Wow. Yeah. So I don't know what the math is there, but it's that's that's to that level games a day. That is so much.

That's 11 games a day. That is so much. That's 11 games a day average. I don't know. Yeah, that's way less. Play Silas. Yeah, Miles has one hundred twenty seven. Miles has a third of the games. Wow. A third. Shake is playing 11 games a day.

Oh, man. I feel bad. He hasn't gotten out of the hole. Remember Nick's league arc, which is also the same. Dude, what a long hair. Pull it. I got it. Yeah, Nick's League arc. He quit. Yeah. Yeah.

But what did he what did he peek at? He got to bronze. Did he? Yeah. Bronze four. It's crazy. He just didn't want to finish iron. He was so it was like all he did. Bad. Well, for so long.

You would think a guy like Nick would be better at a game, but I think it's just a long system. Nick, to me, is like a great gamer. It is crazy. It's crazy he was Iron for that long. He has so little. I think you need to think about the games Nick has played. I thought it made sense.

It's like he has never played a game that is like League. He's never played a MOBA like his frame of reference for starting in this game is so much different than both of you. He's like he has played so many PC games. Yeah, but they're not and he's just a gamer. They're not similar. Yeah, but I think I thought he just picked up shit fast. I know I don't have any doubt in my mind that he would be able to get good

if he like tried and like played long enough. But I think the his square one with that game versus others is very different. You don't got to run D. That's why he needs D. He's not here. He needs it. Guy with weak throat needs D. Yeah. We need my D right now. He couldn't handle it. No, he can't handle D. You know what? We. He couldn't handle it. No, you can handle D

You know what weak throat can't speak up for yourself. Okay, so I come in throw Weak throat you suck at League pussy. He's not gonna listen to shit Pussy bitch, I I'm defending him. Okay, I'm standing I think it's I think he also wasn't focusing on like this how to get better He like if he really cared about like getting really better at like he like learn all the champs He did do it was just he would just doom cue and play and he hyper fixated on like CS yeah, like CS and Lux and that was his win con and I think league tricks you mo was in general trick You into like if you win this minigame and get your cookie

You're actually improving which in reality the improvement happens in many facets. As long as you should play jungle. Are you still playing? I haven't played in like a week, but yeah, I'll run it. I had a phenomenal win rate, but I started hitting a little wall. It's good to get over the hump on this one. I'm out, I'm out. I love volleyball.

But I realize my impact is lasting, because I have not only taken shake drizzle and thrown him overboard like you've created it you've turned him into a hideous beast and that's why I can't even blackbeard I did because I was actually the first thing he goes he goes my teeth aren't that yellow that. Yeah, I turned him into this piece because he was addicted to League, fully quit. And then my arc got him back on. It is also infected so many more people because you're getting reports at like, like one in the morning.

Boosley's like, yo, trying to get a fifth for League. I'm like, bro. No, that's tight. It's one in the morning. What's her rank? It's unranked, but she hit gold in season five. Yeah, OK. Dude, I would love to play with those guys.

Yeah, they're addicted. And then not only did my my league impact start people playing League. This Ironman thing I'm doing, people are doing it. You you've got the you've got a little little impactful swang. It's not good. It's not a good idea. I love the I love the trickle down. It's like Kai does something and everyone copies Kai. And then that trickles down and like into like Ludwig

and Ludwig does something that trickles down. Kai, respectfully? You're like the middle management of this whole system. Respectfully? Just biting shit. When Kai is buried in a pyramid for the lasting impact he has had on America, in a Bass Pro Shop pyramid that they make it his honor.

Yeah. And they do a- And Phantom is on a billboard? Yeah. And he has successfully removed all tax in terms of tariffs. He's our president. We will never have an OPG with his name on it that hits plan. We'll never.

You're such a pussy. He can call me whatever he wants. Never is never going to happen. It'll never unless he buys an account, it'll never. It's like it's like there's a jock at high school and he's fucking all the cheerleaders and he's just fucking awesome. And you're going up to him like, but you'll never be captain of a chess club ever. It's like, you know, and he's looking at you and he's like, and he won't.

He's like, you're right. And you're right. I won't. I got to go, by the way. And I'll say I'll say thanks for admitting it. I'll be at the funeral in the pyramids. I'm looking I'm not looking forward to it because I hope you live a long, prosperous life, but I'll be there. You won't.

OK, so copy that. He can't. Right. Yeah. You know what? Technically correct. The best kind of correct. So, yeah. Anyway, the Iron Man is the next thing people are doing that I that I did. And yeah, people are doing all that. They're like beating you and she didn't beat your ass.

She's son, your dumbass. You know, she's not son. I think you got some. You know, it's OK. You got some. You said it on me. You said it in different words. The OK, she beat it slightly quicker, but. But she had all of the footage of me playing to work off of and like to learn.

Like I was like, I'm Marco Polo. And you're like, yeah, but she ran through like. You're saying with like with no Larry Bird, there's no Michael Jordan. That's what I'm saying. It's like it's like, yeah, she figured out how to dunk quickly. It's like I was the first one to do that. Yeah, you were Dr. J in the little shorts and the goggles. Thank you.

Doing three point line hook shots. Yes. And she's like, oh, I can improve on that. Yes. And that's a way that you make yourself feel better about failing. It's just true. I'm a ground path taker. I'm like, uh, Dompe.

Dompe? Yeah. I walk the grounds, the hollow grounds, and then fucking dumbass little bitch ass Link walks in. That you're useful. Yeah, but anyway, Ray's been playing here for like 15 hours. There's a group chat. I'm in, like five of them are like, yeah, we're playing today.

When you were streaming the other day, were you like coaching different people on their runs? Were you commentating? We were doing a race. And it was to be the first gym leader. And I did it in an hour. And then that was the race. And then I'm like, I have to go. I just got shit to do.

I have to go. And so I leave. And then I come back after 10 hours. And I'm here. And my PC, so everything open, they're still there. Oh, my God. Five people are still like, Saikunobita, Myeongbita, but the other five,

it's still playing and Ray is still not past the first gym leader. And I and I'm like, I'm like, how many times you get past it? She goes once in 14 hours. She got past the gym leader once and she goes, but I'm getting really unlucky. And I'm like, how many times did you get past it? She goes, once in 14 hours. She got past the 2 million once. And she goes, but I'm getting really unlucky. And I'm like, bro. There's unlucky. And then there's like, you know what?

You should just study your hand. Yeah. Yeah. Charts. And I don't think they know the type. I don't think they know that. I don't think they know what fire beats. We just steal from the last episode to steal. Not that's actually the future episode. Still not super effective against bug. episode still not super effective against bug

Steals not super effective as bugs. I'm close even in the game If you if you it's a man's broken your house and he was gonna shoot you in the head been based on your Pokemon knowledge You be dead instantly. Are you thinking cuz like a steel hammer would kill a bug? Yeah. No, man What is steel super super effective rock because it shaves it down ice because it shaves it down and fairy that's dumb You're telling me this deal doesn't shave down the bug doesn't shave the bug for shit That's just doesn't shave the but I've been poison. Oh, that's a little Chris. Don't shave it even a little fucking bit, bro That's I mean, that's that's liberal Johto So anyway, I gotta find my new an arc My new thing to get to my next thing is My new inspirational arc. You have to find the new thing to get to.

My next thing is going to be Promise Week. You know what you could do? What'd you say? Promise Week. Oh, I like Promise Week. I've just been making promises and not keeping them. I've just been lying. To stream.

Oh, okay. So for years. Like we raised a quarter mill for charity during Fast 50 and I just I was like, yeah, because we did this. I'm going to play these games. She didn't do it. Whoa. Shouldn't do it straight up. You know what's fun about being a streamer you can just scam forever and it literally doesn't matter ever. I spun a wheel it said go bald and I was like nah. Yeah you just said I'm not gonna do that. And you didn't. And I didn't. What the fuck? And people still watch your dumb ass. Yeah they do. It's all a joke. It's all a joke. So so well, that's what Promise Week is. Promise Week is my. But what if you just break Promise Week?

Fuck it. Who cares? No, it doesn't matter. That is sacrilegious. I bet he does. You cannot break Promise Week. It's like when Josh at Godmode May and he had 50 things he was going to do every fucking day. And he did like four of them. OK, good enough.

Good enough. 50 things is too many. Why do we support a good enough crew? No, you absolutely cannot break promise week. If it pops up on that wheel, I will do it. Does it just go bald on the wheel? Yeah. No way, bitch.

Go bald will be on the wheel, yeah. 100%. I want to put weights on it like dice. On like the other side. Oh, to make sure it gets it. And it like comes to the bottom and the top one. You know what? Go bald. You shaved your head too many times. It's not even a big deal anymore.

I've never shaved a ball to the bone. I think he just hates it. And that's what's fun. If Ludwig once said as a streamer, never make a sub goal something you want to do anyway, you should just do it. So that's why you know when he's doing all this shit to avoid being bald, he fucking hates it. He doesn't like it. I really don't want him to do it.

And your girlfriend hates it, which is also funny. She has to suffer for no reason, because of your hubris. Two nights ago, Shroud ended his fragathon. He was doing this auction. Right. I don't know if I told you this. I know about the fragathon. Do you know about that?

I saw this. You don't have X. I saw it on X. You know about the 18k? No. What did you do? I got a Biscam, man. Scammed? Yeah, we spent 18k.

Hold on, did we spend 18k on the guy that you spent 50k on that never did the thing with you? Yeah. So, for context, I bought an arrow with Shr shroud during a Maya charity stream four years ago Long time ago And it never happened And it never happened And it never happened Yeah

Although it kinda happened No not really No no cuz he showed up to Ludwig Tarrick and played on our team That kinda counts That's cra- you are such a cuck That's what you're counting? Does that not count? You are just-

Does that not count? It was over an hour? You are just taking advantage of like a- Does that not count? Embarrass me You hour? You are just taking advantage of like a- Does that not count? Embarrass me. You're in the chair in the corner. Embarrass me. Well either way, I got another hour so we're good.

You got another hour? Yes. For 18k? Yes. I got another hour. Oh good, it's discounted from last time. Oh goody. You know what? I think your relationship with Shroud is better. Well okay, it's better and-

He respects you a little bit more. And we're definitely gonna do this hour for sure. I don't think he respects you at all. I think your relationship with Shroud is better. Well, okay, it's better and- He respects you a little bit more. And we're definitely gonna do this hour for sure. I don't think he respects you at all, but- I think he likes me. Actually, I used the word respect. I shouldn't use that word. I think he likes you a little bit more. There we go.

Okay, well, regardless, I didn't even mean to. I got fucked. Did you? Yeah, cause- What do you mean? Oh, I got bullied and dispended ATK. Okay, well kind of. What happened is I did an initial bid as a joke.

I was like, oh, it'd be so funny. So I bid like 5k. I bid 5k. XD. And everyone's like, oh, Ludwig's here. And I was like, huh. And then this guy bids 10k. And he goes, oh, how much to get an hour with Shroud and Ludwig?

And I go 20k. And Shrouds like, yeah, 20k sounds good. And then and then shrouds like, oh, but there's no way to check to see if he bid 20k because the way the bidding system works is if you put in like 100k, it'll only bid 500 against the next highest person. Oh, so you can't like just come over the top like crazy. You can't. 500 is a cap. Yes. Of coming over the top. So if you were winning with 10K, you couldn't if you wanted put 15K in.

Yeah. It would keep you at the lowest to save you some money. So Shroud's like, yeah, I guess somebody would have to bid like 19,500. And then that would show that he bid the 20K and everyone's like, yeah, the guy bid the 20K. It's scam like crazy. So that I put in 19,500 and Aiden, he didn't bid the 20K. Of course, he did.

Of course, there just has to be a different way to check. He did. It has to be like a 18K, which a K, which is like, you know, you are. You're a big ATM. I'm listening. I'm I'm loose. People come up to you and they just fucking put it in their card and they get anything back that they want. I hope it's a good hour. I hope we. Yeah, I hope in 2031 when it happens, it's no, it's happening soon.

That already set the date. Wow. Really? It's next week. We're doing a one view to see who's the better gamer. We're doing a one view. One of the winning crowd in one in what? It's a bro V bro. So he's going to probably pick like what? C.S. fucking any sugar that's C.S. playing a fucking board game.

You know what? If you want to see, yes. Yeah. What else does he play? I don't know this. What else? He bubbed you want me one in C.S. Yeah. And then I get games I'm really good at. League. Mashing. That's it.

That's your pool. Melee. Do that. Yeah, I can smash. You should play him. You do. You play my ultimate. No, they be kind of high. I'll lose. You wouldn't lose.

I'm really bad at ultimate. But he like doesn't know shit. It'd be kind of even.'ll lose. You wouldn't lose. I'm really bad at Ultimate. Yeah, but he like doesn't know shit. But it'd be kinda even. If you play him at Jigglypuff, you're just gonna arrest him and he's like, Oh, what's that? I have a goatee from GameStop. And then you lose. That's what's gonna happen in CS, so might as well hurt him back. Sure, I guess it is humiliating.

You do the darnedest things. Anyway, I'm bringing this up to say I need 18k, because I have to use my personal. Dude, you're such a pain in the... No, you know, it's not my job anymore. That is a pain in the ass though. What? Nothing.

It's awesome. You're awesome. It's actually fine. Is it? Surprisingly fine. You've beaten him. You've beaten and bruised him. He's been an asshole for like four weeks.

This is the best he's been. I'm gonna be a different guy now. He got over it. Well, I'm loosening up. But it took him a while. I'm trying to loosen up. Well, cause he's a hard ass. And Ludwig's right about everything.

He broke him. He's a hard ass. You're like a reek in Game of Thrones. You cut off his penis? Oh, I cut off a damn penis. You cut off his penis? You're like, oh yes Ludwig, oh yes. I'm not gonna defend myself anymore. I'll shave you with a straight razor, I cut off a damn penis. He cut off his penis? You're like, oh yes, Ludwig, oh, oh yes. I'm not going to defend myself anymore.

I'll shave you with a straight razor and I won't cut your throat. I'm not going to argue, I'm not going to defend myself anymore. I'm going to chill out. He's chilling out. I'm going to have a nice time. He's a chill boy. I'm going to break you in two like he did, except it's on this live show. You can break me.

It's fine. Well, how about, you know, in spirit of- I like this. I don't have any. I like this shit. If I take, I should also give because we're giving anything towards the end of the pod. You've given me everything. Well, I want to give you one more shot.

One more shot. I'm going to stand up there. One more shot. I'm going to pull down my pants. I'm going to spread my cheeks and I swear, if you laugh, I'm not showing up for the primo. I might not even show up next week. Do you guys understand? Do you understand the deal that you have made?

This is the most high stakes YLYL. I'm not showing up and I'm still getting paid. Of course you get paid. Now, of course, if you don't laugh and you just tell me what it looks like Because I want to be honestly rated then I'll be here as normal Okay Both my parents are dead really sad Um... I'm a doctor and I'm doing a medical exam. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I'm a damn sawed in Pomona, California. Damn son of a bitch. You go ahead and have the week off.

I'm taking the week off. It's actually, it's so fucked up because there's so little hair. Mine is so hairy. So what's the rank? I told you it's a D1 college basketball player. Not even a little bit close. What? No.

Okay. You know what? I'm not going to use language that might hurt your feelings. I'm going to be very analytical about this. Ludwig, it's too brown. What? No. OK, you know what? I'm not going to use language that might hurt your feelings. I'm going to be very analytical about this. Ludwig, it's too brown. What? Too brown. What is racism? The brownness of your butt hole. It's too brown.

Bring up your bad butt joke again. Are you figuring with the what? A corona? The virus? Not the virus. Not the beer. But what happens when like the sun makes like a circle, right? Like an astrology thing. Yes, sir. I do. Now your butt pretends your butthole tight.

Now around it, what feels like a disproportional area around it is so brown. It's like it's spread instead of like a tight brown little part. A little shots jump out of it like solar flares. There's that little shot. I'm just saying the brownness of your butthole has radiated past where I feel like it's appropriate. There were sparks. OK, so what am I varsity? I'd say you're a rec league butthole.

Oh, that's her. But you're like top of the fucking red. I was not going to go. I thought you were maybe division. Fucking red division. I think you're a rec league butthole. But like you're like those those graying like salt and pepper, like awesome 40 year olds that are like fucking athletic. I thought you were maybe division three? Fuckin' Wreckley. I think you have a Wreckley-ed butthole. Fuck you.

You're like those graying salt and pepper awesome 40-year-olds that are like, fucking athletic as fuck. They cheat on their wives and shit. I haven't seen an asshole spread in a long time, but I thought it was pretty good, but... He fucking, he handed up. He got up there, he took off his shirt. It was so theatrical. He did the little kid at the urinal bit

where you take off all your clothes to stand up and pee. I thought I was going to make it. I got all the way to the... I knew the real kicker is when I bent over, I put my head between my legs so I would look at you so that you would see my face below my butt, which is a weird place to see my face. It's like a very custom board state.

Yeah. Yeah, it's not common. Fucking Nick, it's covered. We see your asshole. Yeah, the world falls apart piece by piece. Department of Education is gone and it's butthole town. Now that's it. Mm hmm. I was going to say also, I was trying to literally pretend I was a doctor. Like, you know, my patient to get into character, you know, I was like,

oh, well, it's just a human body. And he's still cracked. Do you think doctors probably chuckle a little, no? No, they're OK, bro. No, because it's lost the novelty. Really? They see a bubble like before you have your coffee. If you run that for the 80th time, it's just like, come on, man. They've seen everything.

Yeah. Yeah, you do have to have a refractory period, a pretty long one. Also, if you ask doctors about like the most fucked up shit they've seen, it's just so far away from that. It's harrowing. It is so... I remember asking Dr. Noodle Slam what's the worst thing you've seen, and it was just so horrific. Unlistenable, yeah. It's just un-listenable. It is just like...

I mean, I watch House so I get it. The thing is guys, and you can think about this as we go into the primo, which was actually shot before this. So Nick is in there. So if you miss Nick, he's in the primo, which is kind of sweet. But would you rather have a doctor that holds your hand while you die or ignores you while you get better? Think about that, ponder that while you go walk your ass over the primo. Is this the primo where Nick has the worst fucking metaphor?

Like what was he? They had just the worst questions. Oh yeah. No, it's hypothetical. That was last week. I don't know if he came with more. I think that was the primo, right? Where he just had the worst hypotheticals. I think he is on a insane downward trend. It is a sell on Nick.

It's a buy on Nick. It's a buy on Nick because it's lower than ever. No, because he's low and he's got weak throat. But if you buy now, you'll hit for strong throat. It's like Trump coin. It's only going up. I think it's a sell on Nick. Something people think it's a bull market.

But you know, but you know, be your own person. This is not financial advice. This is financial advice. Buy Nick know, but, you know, be your own person. This is not financial advice. This is financial advice by Nick. We'll see you in the primo. Bye slime. He's going to the moon.