The Yard - Ep. 201 - The Lemonade Stand Drama...

Episode Date: May 28, 2025

This week, the boys talk about the Nick Ball controversy, Ludwig's team competing in a tournament, and how Aiden didn't know his podcast was interviewing Gavin Newsom... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

["Sweet Home Alone"] Oh. BWAH! I don't like how deep it must have come from you to take that long. Yeah, you had to dig... That has to be like more poop than gas when it takes that long to get out. Oh Here he comes Here comes our friend

Are we going to fart? Why would you think I did that my mic smells like strawberry? Yeah, you're oh, I'm gonna mine, too. Oh That's kind of cool. I was like My mic smells like strawberry. Yeah, yeah, yours. Oh, I'm gonna mine too. Oh. That's kinda cool. Mine smells like ass. You fart on my mic, why would I fart on your mic? Why the fuck? While he's chewing?

While he's chewing? Why the fuck would he fart on your fucking mic? He felt for strawberries on the mic? You put your nose up to it. Hey, wash your eyes out. Just to check. Come on. Come back. Why do I come back?

No, it's okay. Why do I come back and do your job? He's taking five. You're taking five? That's crazy. Alright, why do we take five? Alright, we're doing it without Ludwig. Five? That's crazy. Five. Alright, Ludwig's gonna take five. Alright, we're doing it without Ludwig. I guess it's a premium episode. I guess it's a premium episode.

Oh man. Is there anything I could say that would make him believe that I didn't do what I did? Uh, no, I think it's too late. I think he sniffed and we laughed. Yeah. We could have just pretended. We could have. It could have-

What if I made the fart noise with my mouth? The thing is we had to reveal it to him because we didn't film you farting on it. I did. No, I'm saying he- Oh, sure, sure. It's on the show, so they don't know what we're talking about. No, that'll be the intro. It could be the intro.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, it's so gross for them to have to see that. What's gross? It opens up. Imagine that's the first episode you found. And then- Oh! What? And then it closes up on your ass? It opens up, it's like imagine that's the first episode you found Do do do do do And then ohhh

And then a close up of your ass So me and Archie developed a new way to censor things when we talk about sensitive issues on the podcast Like Aidan's Erasure of Trans Women Or your farting Or my farting, equally damaging to society But what we do is we make, it's just like a donkey noise Eeehaw Archie's dumb as fuck by the way Society. Yeah, what we do is we make it's just like a donkey noise Archie's dumb as fuck by the way, cuz I had to sit with him and be like the donkey noise Just isn't long enough for the sensor. I'm like Archie just stretch the donkey noise out. Mm-hmm, and he's like, oh that works

Everything around you guys see I do everything with I'm basically in the podcast Archie throw me the fucking premier access code and send me to Wales or wherever you're from. Just send me to Wales. I don't want to dox him. I don't want to stay where he's from, but it's not pretty. I mean, we've said it. He said it every other episode. We've said it so many times. This guy? Yeah, that guy.

This is real today, by the way. I got a new one. And nobody would ever fuck with him in that place Because nobody wants to go there Yeah, it's either you you have to actually trade your teeth for a knife there if you want any sort of weapon It's just it's just not and they have to install it at the pub. Ludwig are you done? Cammy on my account. Oh, he's playing tech on your account with Street fighters. Sorry. Street fighter.

No, this is the game with the guys fighting. That's tech. They're all the same to me. Why is it now? You know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know,

you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you I know Ying Ling's mad because my name on Street Fighter is Nick Ying Ling. Why is his name that? It isn't shame when they get your friend's full name. So what? Everyone thinks you have a sick cameo. Get out! We're recording the podcast.

You do this to yourself. Get out! We're recording the podcast. You carry the lease is really funny. Also, now they think you leave after one game. Wait, you lost and then left? No, they think Nick Ying Ling leaves after one game. And that's America, you lost and then left? Yeah. No, they think Nick Yingling leaves after one game. And that's our that's America, that's the country you live in. They think your cameo is sometimes well played.

Yeah, I didn't think farting on your mic would lose me LP. But here we are. Well, you should have thought about that. You should have thought, what would my revenge path be? And if I don't have a fart ready, it's that. Yeah, I guess it's the closest sim activity for you to do. I'm glad you're back because I have a question for all of you, especially Nick. I recall we played we played Nick Ball last week.

And I recall the rules being if you didn't dunk the ball, you have to do your punishment. You have to do your punishment if you don't know the ball. Yeah. And it's interesting because when when we dunked it the first time, I was like, oh, Ludwig, the ball didn't really look like it went through the hoop. And if you watch the footage back, Ludwig's dunk does not go in the hoop. You missed. He just missed his dunk. That's not true. If you go back and watch, the ball just doesn't go in.

It's not true. And you go back and watch, the ball just doesn't go in. It's not true. And it sounds like there's video. Deferring to the rules of Nick Ball. Is there, Zippor, while we... What is Nick Ball? While we deliberate, can you go to the episode? People time stamped it. So if you scroll the comments a bit, people are...

Here's the facts, man. We go with the ruling on the field. You know what happens in an NBA game when the ref makes the wrong call and determines the game? They go, oops, sorry. I think Nick Ball is kind of like the game, though. It never ends. You think you play the game forever.

Yeah, you're kind of in Nick Ball at. Yeah, I'm keeping a mental score on. So if I ever dunked, I'm fine. Yeah, I think that cleans it up. So I could dunk now. Yeah, but I think that would be fine. But where's the hoop? Where? Yeah, who's gone?

And the hoops right outside. No, it's not. It's directly outside. I can see it right now. It needs to be it needs to be cut in half. The ring of the hoop needs to be sawed. So it's so now the dunk is no one. But if I'm coming clean, I do remember in the moment

totally whiffing that dunk and then everyone thought it went in. So I just went, okay. And I went along with it. I think I, as the creator of Nick Ball and a primary investor, albeit not a hundred percent, I think that if you fool Nick, you get away with it. I mean, that's kind of the point, isn't it? Yeah.

To fool Nick? You fooled me. Yeah. Fool Nick once, shame on him. I think actually if you would have called him out for it missing, I might've taken money away from you. Fool with me with Penn and Teller. That's what I tried to do

It's people trying to jerk Penn and tell her off You have to make tell her moan around me With just teller It's kind of just teller I'm fine with pen not being involved because because you're just and you're blowing this shit out of oh my god Oh my god, the lady up comes in different sizes Pen and teller that's my pen None of your viewers know who pen and teller is everybody knows who pen and teller not even a little bit No, they've moved on to shinlim. They don't know pen and Teller is. Everybody knows who Penn and Teller is. Not even a little bit. No, they've moved on to Shin Lim.

They don't know who Penn and Teller anymore. Okay, Shin Lim. Is Shin Lim an atheist? No, he's Asian. Oh, I got him. I don't think you can be a magician and a Christian. No. You're doing witchcraft.

Wait, you can't be a Jehovah's Witness and be a magician. Or go to Christmas. Or go to Christmas or a lot. They don't get Christmas. They don't get anything. I don't think they get like love from their family. Why would they need it when they get love from God? Problematic Aidan strikes again.

He is what's new on the podcast. Why you all why do you all just look me up and down? Did we all just do that? You all just kind of fucking absorb me. I didn't do any of that. You came in today with all this energy and I was wondering why. With all this energy? I had energy? With all this energy. I was just looking at you like the slob you are. Okay. I walk in with Nick, he's got a lukewarm coffee one hand, a half-eaten Italian sandwich in the other.

You know what he's doing? Just looking at YouTube shorts. This is all fine. This is all the sandwich from today. The coffee from today. The YouTube shorts, who knows when they were posted, but enjoyed today. That's not fine. Is it? You just described a guy being a regular. This is a guy who's doing YouTube with food.

But it's shorts, man. It's different. They weren't even open. Are you judging me? I was on the homepage. You're addicted to shorts And I think it's the worst quality about me. That's the worst quality about one I couldn't even have a back of being able to be vulnerable in front of your friends

I do that all the time. Let's rank Ludwig's worst qualities. That's a good idea All right number one He can't access his feelings on a whim. Oh I actually think him being addicted to YouTube shorts is worse than can I say I think I access his feelings on a whim. Oh, so does- I actually think him being addicted to YouTube shorts is worse than this. Can I say I think I access my feelings better than you do? Your feelings are- but they're not real. They are real.

No. I think you mask your feelings by calling other people's feelings not real. That's not true. I think you do that. But prove it. Hmm. Don't need to. Prune it.

Don't need to. What do you think my worst quality is Nick I thought maybe it wouldn't have to come around to me because you got such a short okay I got it it is your centering in Call of Duty black ops 6 because brother what the hell were you doing he's looking for ants car is so cool my guns in the way. I know what I'll do. I'll point at the ground when I walk around. Is that like a pacifist type of thing?

Was it a horrible game before or after Scump dropped a nuke? He didn't drop a nuke. He just had one. It was against the rules to use it. But he got a nuke. Most countries do the same, by the way. This is, this is, most have a wrong day. Yeah, it wasn't fucking fun after that either,

but it wasn't fun before. It's probably the angriest I've been at video games in a while. You were pissed. Were you more pissed at COD than you were a street fighter? Like easily. What do you mean? I was like, I was.

You were mad at street fighter, man. Oh yeah, like when I was playing Squeaks. Yeah. Yeah, but the anger ultimately was at myself, and I knew how to resolve it. In COD, the resolving of my anger was uninstalling. Really? Yeah. I bet that shit took like 20, like 30 minutes to uninstall.

It was not a quick uninstall or install. Are you sure you'd like to get rid of all your CP? Alright, 900 gigabytes and CP down the drain. COD fucked me, man. It pissed me off. First off, the UI is horrible in that game. Yeah, it looks like Hulu. It does look like Hulu, and Hulu's UI is ass.

But is the UI the reason that scum's dropping a nuke? No, no, no. Scum's dropping a nuke because he spent the better part of his life playing a fucking useless game. Pfft. That's why it wasn't always useless. I mean... Back when the zany sidekick was playing, that was some good games. It's always been useless, through and through, man. And it carried, I realized my anger carried over

because I went to PSL and I was still mad at the game. Really? Yeah, I go to PSL and I'm like, and I'm thinking to myself, I'm like, why the fuck does Nick have a one sniper rule? Like, snipers aren't supposed to be a thing. And then I was like, it's because this motherfucker. And then I just see him mid with a sniper. And every time I see him, I'm mad.

Wait, you made a one sniper rule and you get the sniper? Yes. No, these are from- Oh my god, you don't want to have this comment. He does that, yes! I hate this! I'm getting mad! Call of duty tournaments play with these rules. This guy, I don't wanna listen to the loud guy. I'm playing black ops 6 and I'm hearing the rules are no snipers. It's a gentleman's agreement They do no snipers. Yes. And I got a PSL and Nick's like one sniper one And guess who's the best sniper you guys had nuke enabled in your game You guys had kill streaks and thermal and all sorts of awesome damn awesome UAV in our games You want kill streaks? I would love a pred got to you. So you don't play competitive. That's fine with me. I had a sniper competitive Uh, I to be real you wanted to go there. I play sniper because if I play red gun the game's over

What do you think about that? PSL is running into an existential crisis again. Yeah, because the wealth inequality at PSL It was as yeah, which is an intent outside. It was as' as ever been last time. Yeah, it was like 20 people. 20 D? Yes, 20 D, like enough for five teams, but they're all clamoring for the same thing. They're all going, Halo, Halo. They all want Halo.

And Nick's like, no kids, you're gonna have another three Call of Duty games, then you can get your Halo. Oh my God. That's so fucking funny. This is what actually happened. After every game, this is real, after every game someone goes,

okay, this was fun, but I'd love to play Nibbison and he was the only person asking for it When he finally got halo he played two games and left well because you didn't start here It's a damn tape. It's an answer me this Ludwig Is it like when you force everybody at the party to play melee when they clearly all they just want to play ultimate they just Like a little play solid snake in Sonic It's not like this and by left it I mean I put a vote out for what games we play at PSL And I said pick two we're gonna play two we always play two usually I try to do cod and halo

Last time we did halo first cod second so this time I was like we'll do cod first and halo second second. So this time, I was like, we'll do CoD first and Halo second. This is very rational thinking. I just switched them and I picked the games everyone voted for. What if PSL didn't have CoD? Nick would lose all his passion, he would die. It would die. It would die. No, I have fun playing Halo. Is that the Liam running Mario into horror games of PSL?

For Nick, yeah. He's like, all right, I clock in. We'll play some Halo, whatever. I'll get a run going. And then he loads up some itch.io bullshit. I took Walshy's head off with a quick scope, and then I pulled up feeder mode to show him. And he said, I'm not going to lie, that was pretty crazy.

And that was the biggest rush I had at PSL. Halo is not the problem There is no problem. No problem. No problem. He said it's not the problem. What's the problem at PSL? What's the existential crisis? I'm telling you it's the Cod the Cod because I do hate it and I need to tell you I did bring the hate over You didn't hate Call of Duty at PSL before this. No, I don't think I did. This is almost...

But now this... Yeah, I've opened my third eye. Mechanically, the new Black Ops is not like ProBot. Yeah, but this is like when a right winger finds out Tom Hanks is a pedophile that can't enjoy Toy Story. Right, that all did happen. Is it like that? It's like that.

He's a pedophile. So my question is, did you play black? Like, did you get like biblically fucked in the hole in the Call of Duty tournament? Yeah. Yeah. I didn't see any of this. We got, we got fucked and it was, and it was by Saikuno who does diaper play. Look how far we've gone. He's back. By the way, Sykuno's my guy now, cause he plays Diamond, Cammy, and he's nice with it. He is nice with it. So don't say some shit about my guy. No, he just does a diaper play, he enjoys it.

That's all I'm saying. We've come so far. We've come so far. That's a 2-0-1 confirmed. It was, it was, it was basically- Has a butt rash on B? Defusing with a butt rash. Basically, Cod gave you team points for how well your team plays, and then individual points for how good your score was.

It's not even Katie, it was like your score, because it adds objectives. The game score gives you? Yes. And so there's certain game modes where you can just rack up kills. And so we're playing hard point, you're supposed to capture this point until it's 250.

They stop capturing after 200. And it's just 10. It's just 10. Jacob makes a Ikuno just mowing us down. And I listen to the comms after and it's gross. It's like, it's like, woohoo! Just got a quintuple kill! I'm shooting these kids down! Don't capture the point, let's farm these guys! They're just turning you out.

Yeah. And all five of us are just getting turned out and our vibes are fucking cut up. And then we go to S&D Slum. But S&D doesn't have as many points as Hardpoint. Because you don't get to kill them as many times. Because when we die, we're dead forever. Right.

It's like how it should be. Sure. But instead what they think is they think, OK, we're going to lose this game on purpose. And then go to a third a third game which is control where you can then go back to fucking them As a team to throw so they're going knife only here's a fucked part they still win the knife only round no And that's not possible because we're just like we're dejected people knife knife is g8 in pro-cods It's so good that they don't use it right okay, so it is pretty good and and so what happens But it shouldn't work what happens is is we catch word of they're trying to do this

So we say fuck this and we kill ourselves one semtech screen on the ground we stand over it screaming crying And again, I watch your POV, they start freaking out. They're like, no, our plans aren't gonna work of fucking them in the ass for four hours. Let's kill ourselves so we can fuck the martyr. And then they start racing us to kill themselves. Just gamifying this quarter-mille tournament

so they can fuck us as good as they want so that they can get more money. They wanna fuck you how they wanna fuck you. They wanna fuck you how they wanna, and we don't wanna be fucked. We don't wanna be fucked in the first place. And I They want to fuck you how they want to fuck you. And we don't want to be fucked. And I'm telling Sekuno, I won't put the diaper on. I won't put the diaper on. And he's like, come on Ludwig, I got baby powder. And he's like, come on Ludwig, I got baby powder.

And then finally, Finally we succeed in it, our mission to kill ourselves, it ends. And guess which team outplaces us by one point? And guess which team outplaces us by one point? And guess which team outplaces us by one point? No. Their team. The farming team. The farming team outplaces us by one point. The farming team. The farming team, the farming team, the farming team outplaces us by one point. One point. So they were dead last basically and they were just destroying you guys?

They were dead last and then yeah they destroyed us for enough points to beat us in the whole competition by one point. What was holding your team back you think? That's genius. Emi, Agent, Squeaks, Tyler1. I thought Agent was the COD player. I thought Agent was the COD player. Agent was probably our best in COD and, you know, the 10th best COD player at the event. Sure. It is crazy to have, Nade's team was crazy. I can't believe they didn't win because they had two COD players.

They won't, well they didn't have Scum. Surely Scum's team won. No, they didn't win. They won COD. Oh they did? Yeah, they should win the overall. Hold on, real back up, you, he said who was holding your team back, you named every team member but yourself. Yeah, Lud was leading the pack, and they were all holding them back.

Street Fighter I got fifth, League of Legends my Warwick 1v1 double lift like ten times, I was the second frag in CS2. You actually did perform. You carried. Yeah. Your Cod was up his hat. You were like the most stable, you might've been the MVP. In the individual points, Tyler got 31 and I got 30.5.

Wow. I was a half a point off. But after it's like, it's like Tyler, me, top 10. And then it's like, do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do 16, 17, 18 is the rest of my team. Yeah. So it was- The Mortal Kombat tower and it just squeaks. And I don't blame them. Like- I mean, wait. Hold on, hold on, hold on. You just blamed them.

No, I don't. Isn't this- I drafted them. OK. Isn't this your fault? Yes. Because you drafted this team. Because I could have drafted Landmark, who's third overall,

instead of Emiru. Yeah. And that, we probably would have had an insane team if I did that. Is Landmark a man? Landmark is a man Yeah, he plays Tark Kog. So if you have all five players as men that means you're gay. Oh the woman was the problem is what you're saying. I'm saying the woman was the the horrible blight on our team.

It's like a band bro. If you if it's all boys in the band you're gay. So you did the right thing. I'm an agent wasn't picked so there's nothing I could do there. But to be honest, I wouldn't change if I could go back. I feel like you would I wouldn't talking about no I wouldn't you're so mad at cod. You're saying the vibe cod and the vibes were so good. You wouldn't change Yeah, I think I sparked lifelong friendships and Tyler said he'd be my groomsman at my wedding. So he's in the pyramid now He's in the pyramid which row of the pyramid. He's obviously gonna be at the bottom. He's carrying He's just gonna be it's actually gonna be one at the bottom in first period He's squatting all you guys easily he has a logitech headset on man, that'd be awesome Yeah, no my team was my team was kind of awesome. Is it over? It's over. It's done. It's done forever

That's so sad As far as sponsored things go and I know that that company particularly has issues with South Sudan right now. But I think that was a pretty cool event. It's bad. On a map, could you point to South Sudan? Generally, yeah. Good enough for me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Generally is good. In Europe. Really? Anyway, that's cool, man. I'm glad. I think gaming's back. Gaming is anyway. That's cool, man. I'm glad I think gaming's back gaming is back AT&T Annihilator cup and then AT&T Annihilator cup brought it back. Yes. I'm not just RT RT I was a combo breaker. That's where gaming happens, dude. I

Saw sage am slams happening. Yeah, and what I didn't realize is what I said about Sajam Slam. Yeah, you, yeah. Did you see the clip? Is it the one where you go off on Capcom and also Sajam Slam? It's someone says, what did you say? Hey, would you do Sajam Slam? And I said, I'd rather slam my head into the wall

and then kill Sajam. Let's go. That's fire. That's really, really funny. So I don't think I'm invited. No, you think that, but half the FGC has me blocked because I didn't know who Akira Toriyama was. And I got into the second one.

So there's a redemption arc for everybody. Honestly, every time I see a fighting game thread on Twitter, and it's like half the people I can't reply to. It's really funny. No, I actually like it. I'm like, I can't reply to. It's really funny. And I'm like, no, I actually like it. I'm like, you don't, we don't talk to each other. This is probably better for us. They're happier without me for sure.

It's fair. But yeah, I went to Comma Breaker. I played Tekken and I played Melee. And Josh won Melee, which is really funny because it was like, Lod. Yeah. It's like, Tommy was like, Henry... Lodd. And that's it. But Zipper,

if you want to show that picture I sent you, I played against a guy. He's a fan. This was in Losers. And I played against Paul Phoenix. And let's just see the controller that he used. This is in Melee?

No, this is... Paul Phoenix is not in Melee. Paul Phoenix? It took him out? Man! This guy beat me. He's playing on a Cheerios box. Oh, Cheerios box! That's so sick! In a small, right- inverted left-handed, leverless controller.

That is very- no one can just fucking sit down and play with that. The inversion's crazy. Yeah, so he beat me in the video game. Yeah, and then he said I'm a big fan Who's he playing? He was playing Paul Phoenix He was Paul Phoenix that's me too Yeah, he's like one of the first one he was like no Paul Phoenix he was being kind of asshole I thought yeah, but I thought he was saying Paul Phoenix doesn't play melee like that was obvious. I thought he meant in melee I thought Paul Phoenix was that guy. I thought Paul Phoenix wasn't in melee. I heard play.

Yeah Yeah, wait does it rotate cuz that was not how. Yeah, so the leverless part I think the Cheerios box is simply to rest his hands on. Yeah So yeah, he beat me with that. So that's pretty cool part I think the Cheerios box is simply to rest his hands on yeah so yeah he beat me with that so that's pretty cool that's like my garbage bag we're the same yeah you're the same as this guy and that means he went probably three to in Tekken which is pretty hard to do but it was really fun I think gaming's back gaming's back you're a good time at common breakthrough a lot of people

there there's a shitload of people like 6,000 people I mean gaming is back a supernova entrance already insane what's it yeah I don't know if I'm a common breakthrough a lot of people there. There's a shiver be like 6,000 people I mean gaming is back a supernova entrance already insane. What's it? Yeah, I don't know if I'm a lot of leak there We're trying to break the world record we do set for sensors now we do donkey noise you say what I want go ahead say some shit Now we do donkey noise. You say whatever you want. Go ahead say some shit. Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh uhhhhh my god dude don't say that yeah, I don't want to do that I mean either no, I don't want to plan an old sign up for Xbox live. Yeah, you know yeah, it's not bad It is bad. It's not that expensive. It's how much is it? It's but you get to pay for it 10 bucks a month you don't have to pay for steam. It's kind of awesome. Does Xbox live work for new Xboxes? Yeah, okay, so it works for the old Xbox.. Yes. They never change. You buy that you buy the new one You buy game pass core. Do you have game pass?

Then you also just have like 1600 Microsoft points you pay with dollars now. No fucking way Okay, if you have the old cope codes, can you use them? Um, no, the marketplace is gone So all of that money has just been deleted if you've been holding on to it. You've been sitting on that? I have an unused iTunes gift card, a $10 iTunes gift card that's been sitting in my backpack for I think nine or ten years. And I just, you know, I don't use iTunes. The amount of songs you can get with that is just going down by the day. I know. It's inflating.

It's inflating away. Let's buy some Macklemore. So we'd own it. I want hard, I want hard, soft copies of Macklemore. So we don't it. I want hard, hard, soft copies of Macklemore. No, buy the Macklemore MP3s and then put exactly those ones on a CD. Does Macklemore still have a fucked up haircut that's hard to look at? Oh, like the white Skrillex? Fully shaved sides with gold on the top.

He's probably low-key balding. Do you look a Macklemore current? Macklemore 2025. I feel like he's probably got good hair. He's probably Loki balding. You look a McLemore current. McLemore 2025 I feel like he's probably got good hair. You can afford it That's great. Oh wait. He looks great. His hairline is wonderful. This is awesome. But this is not new is it? What's the second one? I feel like this is what he looks like now. Click that, click that second. There's some old ones sprinkled in. Fourth of June. Fifth of June. That's a tour poster. Dude, where is he at? He's going to freaking, where is he?

Ireland? Dude, he looks like you. Yeah, he kinda looks like, I was gonna say he looks like Ludwig. Really? You're dressed like that right now. And you look good. You actually are wearing almost the same outfit.

I don't think he does not look like me. You would rock up in some dumb shit like that. Yeah, he probably freaking thrifted. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Whoa.

Whoa. What is it? It is that? What is that? Life goes crazy When we're shopping that one on lemonade stand Dude, if a match got lit near your sweater You would be incinerated instantly Yeah, for sure. I'm hot Go up like a Christmas tree. It won't make it happen

I wanna pour lighter fluid down your CG's Like a viking funeral Lock me in a cage and do it Like that ISIS video Don't bring up the ISIS video All right like a Viking funeral lock me in a cage and do it like that Isis video Talk about you know what we can talk about Isis An open forum to discuss let's talk about Isis. Do you guys know what the lemonade stand did to me? Do you guys know about this? No, dude, they Gavin this is funny interviewed Gavin Newsome and just didn't tell me Made me like them all so much. Yeah

because it was it was it was the funniest thing he could have done to because they were both interviewing Gavin Newsome and intro'd as hosts of Lemonade Sand and They didn't tell Aiden about it But not only did they not tell Aiden Hr called Aiden to ask him if he could contact Doug Doug Because Doug Doug was late for the interview. Dude. Deadass. So they made Aiden do the work of getting Doug Doug there so he could do the interview.

Wow. A plus work. And then proceeded to have just fucking one of the worst interviews all time. Was it that bad? It's pretty bad. I mean it was just not worth anyone's time. Yeah. Was Gavin Newsom just like a stonewall politician? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I don't know if I'd describe just like a stonewall politician. Yeah

Describe him as a stonewall politician. The mediator is just the questions and the mediator were soft. I like called it softball city I like seeing it was all balls in the discord green glow around Gavin Newsom That's crazy. That was really funny and he just like fucking Wheel clip thumbnail of something atriach loaded is him and Atrioc in a discord call together. Gavin Newsome, Atrioc, waiting room five. Just the two of them. Wow. I wonder what they chopped it up about. Are you hurt that they left you out? Uh, like genuinely? No, because this being so much funnier than... Like if I was in the interview, it would have been just as bad and there'd be nothing to talk about.

But because they did this, it's funny and I get to talk about it forever. What's the equivalent we could do to hurt Aiden? It doesn't need to go back and forth. It's not an arms race. No, I think there is some sort of equality that we need to match with. A podcast with Wendover.

Oh my God. With Sam from Wendover. That would kill me. That would be actually fucked up. We recorded it on like Saturday. Yeah, and I call Aiden and he's on a town and I go, what's the code? What's the code? Cause Sam from Wendover is here and he didn't get him in.

He's like literally like fucking in Sweden. I would be fine. I would skip a lifetime. We take a trip. We take a train wherever we're going. We're taking a train from Malmo. Malmo. And we're going to Svieras with Dr. Van Oliver. That's a good idea.

And he looks like that. Monday comes around, Aidan's like, what time do you guys want to do it today? And we're like, oh. And we'd be like, oh, do we not? Dude, we're in. To hell we're in freaking Uppsala right now. We're in freaking Uppsala toging our dicks. You don't need to name me.

No, we dead ass land in Gothenburg. We did. We did. Go to bed. You're knowing like low key Swedish shitties pisses him off a lot. Yeah. I'm more Swedish than you will ever be.

Ooh. That's real shit. Till you die. That's not true. It is true. If I can get Swedish citizenship. If I can become a Swedish citizen and live there, I'm more Swedish than you are.

I can get Swedish citizenship tomorrow. That's not Swedish citizen and live there, I'm more Swedish than you are. I can get Swedish citizenship tomorrow. That's not how that works. Wait, could you? Yes. Do it to flex. If your father is Swedish, you can get Swedish citizenship. All right. You want to bring it here? You want to dig yourself out of this hole? Uh huh. Yeah.

Second generation Sudanese immigrant in Sweden. He's less Swedish than you. Second generation. He speaks the language. Citizen. Well, South language. Citizen. Citizen. Well South Sudan is next to Sweden. If he's a citizen before me then yes. But I'm saying I can get citizenship before you.

So you would be more Swedish just because you can pencil your citizenship in before I can. Yeah you would count the date obviously. Like a baby is less Swedish than a 75 year old Swede. So you would do it just to spite me. You would become a Swedish citizen. Yes. So you could say that.

Yes I would do. We need to get Nick Kingling to just do this for him Yeah, yeah We're hatching a plan. No disrespect to Yingo, but he's gonna go to the Sudanese consulate thinking it's a Swedish one Shipped off That'd be so funny. Say goodbye to the Annihilator Cub. I can't trust Yingo with that. He misses the details sometimes. sometimes no he did all that work to import your dumbass truck He said it was the hardest thing he ever did. He nailed that. Yeah, but well kind of okay. Well here we go

What'd he do? Well it nailed it. What'd he do? Well there was some you know nailed it He had to go to Arizona maybe five times the truck got here. Yeah, and then I'm like yay my trucks here I'm gonna drive my truck, and he's like, ah, don't get too attached. I'm like, why? He's like, ah, bring it back to Arizona. I'm like, what do you, what for? He's like, yeah, they need to work on it. And I haven't registered it yet.

I was like, you didn't register it? He's like, well, it was really confusing, but I figured it out. So I definitely got it this time. Yeah, he couldn't spell register. And then he said that, and then he went back. And then he didn't have it that time. And then he had to go back again. And then to straddle me on, he waves a care in front of my face.

He goes, you can pick the license plate. And I'm looking through and I'm like, oh, well, I want the vintage one. Because they have like vintage Arizona ones. And he's like, I can't. That's gas only. What if gas only license plates? Well, yeah, then the vintage ones only for gas cars, I guess. So I was like, all right. And I'm looking through, they have some awesome license plates.

Like they have anti-abortion committee. That's not the awesome one. What I'm trying to paint is that that's bad. They have a range of all the Arizona license. They have like 100. I don't know. You can like just submit to some board to get a plate. It's like when you get like a picture of Shrek on your debit card. Yeah. Yes. You rolling up, you rolling up in your K truck on the back, it says, take away a woman's right to choose.

Arizona. Yeah. It's just mogul. Yeah. Scroll down. Just just scroll through this. This is all the plates that they offer. Damn. So many. It's like a hundred of them. Wait, California has like three. I know.

Woman veterans. Woman veterans hard. So what I learned is that a lot of these require certain from like White Mountain Apache You have to show the DMV that you're a white mountain Apache or or you have a purple heart And you have to show them you're from the Phoenix Rising football club together. Yes, you need to show your You have to show them you're from the Phoenix Rising football club to get that one. Yes, you need to show your pro Dude leaving all the zeros if you could get it is pretty cool. Also Pearl Harbor survivor, but you're in Arizona Yeah, also you'd have to be like those people are like they're dying. They like it's not a dozen It's not many people left. It's not a dozen.. No, it's it's it's probably one dozen.

Can we can you look up science? So this is the one I wanted. You look up science. You wanted no child science. Well, science. There you go. I wanted the Arizona science. Matrix.

I know. That is cool. I know. Also available with a disability symbol. There's a there's an awesome for audio listeners, Arizona Science Center license plate, which is just a full ripoff of the Matrix. It's like the green code, fucking background, you put your name.

And I was like, that'd be awesome. Let me do that. But, okay, they fucking lied. It's not available to everyone because if you have a fucking electric vehicle, you can only get one license plate. At all? Only one. Out of the hundred that they offer, if you have an electric vehicle, you can only get one license plate at all only one out of the hundred that they offer If you have an electric vehicle, you can only get the cloud one. Can you look up alternate alternate? Bro, just control of alternate

Alternative I put you on game real quick. Yeah, what up get a license plate for your regular car and just fuck it Just fucking put it on the fucking car. Fuck it. What are you saying? I put it get a license plate for like your regular gas car. Just scroll down and then just swap which cards on. Yeah, fuck it. That's just a crime. Like it's one of the most blatant ones. Fuck it.

Nick, it's like the police trooper cars can just scan your- They don't know what they're doing. You get the police pulls you over, you know what you do. You got the window, you go like this, you go, you go, fuck you. My dad was a police officer growing up, and he liked that. Foreign vehicles hard too. I know, I know.

Why are these so cool? Dude, there's a thin red line. And blue, don't get me wrong. Former prisoner of war? That's the one I'm supposed to get, by the way. That's the one I'm supposed to get, to get by the way is a historic vehicle Horseless carriage wait is that what John McCain was rocking on his car? Probably on a rizwan console if you were like work for the consulate in Phoenix

Yeah, they have so many fucking awesome one need a plug bad I know so anyway, I'm stuck with fucking bitch ass cloud if you can look up Arizona electric car I just always it wasn't there. I think you're fucking capping I'm getting it well so you're gonna see my bomb ass license plate you're but your max top speed 50 mph K truck oh no that guy goes like 150 nothing ramps it would take heart I mean it's terrifying when you go 70 yeah that's it. Energy efficient. It falls apart. That looks terrible. I know. Like the Flintstones car. I know it's terrible. It'll look kind of cool on your car if you paint your car.

This is a bit of a soy cock license plate. I know. I wanted to fucking... Imagine you made the numbers on the Matrix one like 1010. I know. I was thinking that, dude. Pretty cool. Anyway, I'm not going to leak what the plate is obviously because I'm not trying to fucking have you guys run up on the... Or you make it red pill.

Oh, and there's never a passenger in it like a cyber truck. is obviously because I'm not trying to fucking have you guys run up or you make it red pill. Oh Well, and there's never a passenger in it like a cyber. I was gonna do no pill and do the anti-abortion one That's clean that's pretty cool. Yeah, so it doesn't make as much sense on the clouds, dude I was at I was a combo breaker and I was thinking about it a lot because it's it's my first like fighting game Tournament like I because I usually just go shut strip for melee and melee was thinking about it a lot because it's my first fighting game tournament. Because I usually just go straight for melee. And melee was kind of beat. But anyway, I'm there the whole time and people recognized me. And I was like, dude, we're batting.

We're pitching a no-hitter. There's not anyone who has made me annoyed at all until the very last day. I'm sitting playing Street Fighter with this young Jit, Ali Handal, and we're both like, just platinum players, and we're both just like playing. I keep thinking it's their name. What? You're playing with Ali. It's not Ali Handal, right?

That's a guy. Yeah. Oh, it is a guy. It is a guy. It's a real guy? It's not a character. That's a guy. He's in Brawl Bros. chat.

How do we fuck this up? Yeah, it's tough. I also thought it was a Street Fighter worker. Cause there's no way you would have a last name. Yeah, why do you have a last name like that? So we're playing, and we're like, we ran this like first to 15 the day before. It was like 15, 14, and I'm like, I'm going to lose my fucking mind because I lost. And then we're playing the next time, and he's like, dude, he's smoking me.

It's like 9-0, and I'm just fucking angry. And it's on my laptop setup because they're packing up all the shit because it's on Sunday. And I was just, and this two guys come up to me. They're like hey slime Can we get a picture just like right in the middle and I'm like I just want a mash rematch Oh, no, it was right after so they waited okay, they waited But it just says oh nine like right on the fucking screen because it keeps track. I'm like yeah Yeah, let's get let's have a picture and I'm like kind of pissy about it They take a picture and and they think it's funny.

It's like, it's fine. And then the guy taking pictures, like, okay, can I get one after him? I'm like, yeah, sure. And the guy taking it, he's like, yeah, bro, you're pretty good at Street Fighter. And I got so mad. Cause I'm like, cause I thought he was making fun of me.

He was fucking, he was making fucking fun of me. Totally innocuous interaction. He was fucking making fucking fun of me. This is an error in baseball world. This is an unforced error on your end. So I'm like, you know what? You don't get one. You don't get a picture. You don't get a picture. Your friend gets one, but you don't. And I'm like, you tell him that you he fucked it up And I sit down and all he's like he's he's funny he's he's from bra pros chat Then we met up at the thing and he's like really sick of Tekken But he's like 20. He's like a kid. And so he's just seeing all this happen. He didn't know, he's like, yeah,

I didn't know who Ludwig or you like were. I just thought you were a guy from like the chat room, which is, I'm like that sick. Yeah. But he's watching, he's like, what the fuck is going on? I'm like, don't worry, I just want to play fucking Street Fighter. And he's like, he's laughing. He's like, you're wiping tears.

All right, bro, how about this? We'll play this game. If you win, you have to take the picture. If I win, or sorry, if you win, you don't have to take the picture. Yeah. And if I beat your ass, like I've been doing the last nine games,

then you have to take it. You said it like that? I'm like, fine. I'm like, yeah, he's cool. And we play. And I fucking, I played the best of the game of my life. I was doing shit I haven't done all weekend.

I was like hitting everything. I'm like getting him and shit just off of like pure fucking anger. And I just smoke the guy and I turn to like, did you fucking throw? He's like, no, I promise I did not throw. And I got I took a picture of the guy. But I am a pussy because I was like, you know, I got what I wanted. That's really Take are you saying on that you earn that? No, cuz you know what? It gave me time to think as I was really what he wanted was to win a game

I just went a video game. Yeah, and I finally got it. So that man got a picture, but one of them I'm very grumpy and the other one Yeah, but that was the only that was great. Conrad was really fun. It sounds like you had no bad interactions. Oh, I was at the god damn mystery game tournament. Dude, it was sick. Let me find

the fucking... I can finish the end of my Xbox story. I mean, I've been playing Xbox, called it story. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Me and Alex have been playing Xbox, Call of Duty 4. And there's only one lobby up at all times for Call of Duty 4 now, so we usually just play and just try to win the game. Because it's just fun to go. Because there's no objectives or anything,

so you just try to win with kills. And the people who are playing Call of Duty 4 are like, I'm assuming they're in their late 30s, and they're playing for nostalgia purposes, and usually we will get a lot of kills and win the game. And I got a message through Xbox Live. Like someone is messaging me from the game through Xbox. And I open it and it just says, I think you've played enough of this game. What? And I have not gotten that out of my head.

That's the most owned I have ever gotten Why are they still doing that? They're sending that message I know I mean because you know we're playing like an old game and we're getting like yeah like 30 40 kills And he was just like yeah, I think you've I think you've had enough of this. Maybe they thought they could escape you know Pub stomping in cod for yeah, surely. There's no pub stoppers left They just beg you to not play the game anymore. Yeah, surely there's no pub stompers left. They just beg you to not play the game anymore. Yeah, Alex has been bringing it up like once a week.

He'll just like laugh to himself and be like, I think you've had enough of this game. That's something that should have been like shown to Josh throughout his life. Yeah, except Melee. I guess if they did that, that would have been awesome. But he was just said no. Every time I see those messages, because I remember going to friends houses that had Xboxes because I never had one and they'd receive and send messages Typing on that keyboard using a controller to frequently send stuff is such a pain I'm so some people we get so good at I'm so fast a useless skill, man

I think I can win a tournament of typing on that controller. So yeah, this is Mystery Game Tournament. So Combo Breaker has done this for like the past 10 years. So every single round of the tournament, like every bracketed round, is a different game on a different system. And it can be literally anything. So this is a Sailor Moon fighter for, I think, the 3DO, the Panasonic 3DO.

And it's apparently this isn't the broken one. There is a Super Nintendo Super Sailor Moon fighter that has infinites, but this is like one. And, uh, this is my first round and I go on stream against my opponent and they pick chibi Sailor Moon, which is the mini version of Sailor Moon. I picked regular Sailor Moon, which is the Mario. Yeah, because I'm like, you can't go wrong. It's baby Mario versus.

And you don't know. So like you like they don't let you sit and play the game. They don't let you learn anything. All you can do is kind of like watch. And it's just a fighting game with all the sailors and it's fucking sucks. So I lose this one, but you can just see some of the gameplay. Oh, my God. Yeah. She said this is an odd job sort of character because she's shorter than every single character in the game, but long story short

I figure out how to do a Shoryuken and Yeah, the meta in these games is just find the projectile and spam it. Yeah, so she found the cat bomb Yeah, I'm like, okay cat bomb. I'm trying to jump in. Oh man, you're getting fucking worked bro. I'm getting fucking destroyed But then I start sweeping the corner though Yeah, that way you side switch. Oh, then I found the sweep sweeps working pretty good. Okay grab here. Okay situation. Yeah But I find out how to do her her sure you can so I start trying to do it it has no hitbox So this that's later on in the game, but anyway, this was the whole thing. I lose this one I won my next see one of them was Garfield cart. Okay

Non fighting games in it. Yeah. Yeah, there's it's like racing games The second game I played was it was like Capcom versus SNK on the game the Neo Geo pocket Damn, it was like an 8-bit fighting game. I haven't played any of these consoles. Yeah, you're saying shit I've never heard they also on virtual hardware, which is cool. And then the I lost in virtual fighter 3 for the dreamcast. Is there Sort of normal popular games in it. Can you roll Street Fighter 6 or is it all niche stuff? No, it's all bullshit. Yeah, be kind of dumb if you could. Yeah, but Josh, so Josh went 0-2 Yeah, he shit the bed. He was playing this dragon fighting game Where like you're like jousting with other dragons.

So you don't all play the same games? No, dude, even like the next wave is like nobody plays Sailor Moon again. Like even if you're just in the next wave, they don't like reuse the game ever. Did the show have under or lowercase letter aesthetic or is that just in this game? That's in this game? That's in the game. I don't know why they did. You're also fighting an arcade game. That's pretty cool.

Guess who got 9th? You're never gonna believe it. Dreffen. Damn. And you know how he got knocked out? Two Wiimote games on the Wii. That's tough. What game is even on the damn Wii that's coming up? I forget but he explained it. Oh shit!

Yeah, it's on my throw. So what I found out is you have to press two buttons It's only three buttons on the controller two buttons and then like a DP input to do your your special The other of us found this out. I also like it. You look like you're beating bro. I'm not gonna lie. Dude, it's tough I think it goes one one. I'm just saying your face cam looks like you're beating bro. I'm not gonna lie. Dude, it's tough. I think it goes 1-1. I'm just saying your face cam looks like you're beating. Oh, like I'm beating my dick? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was not beating my dick. This is not what you'd want to be on screen if you were gonna beat it. Yeah, not Chibi Sailor Moon. I'm just joking at the Sailor Moon half. It's just the Sailor Moon half. Beating off to this is worse than beating off in public. It's like, yeah, I was in public, but look what he was looking at But yeah, it's really fun, but yeah also who knocked out DREF in jubilee

In a we mode game. Oh, it's like a dream DREF in we're playing Sailor Moon fighter yeah, yeah gaming's definitely back gaming is back I look TK breezy was a little commentating is that funny I think I think this is why everyone should go get an Xbox 360 we're not getting Xbox 360 I'm not sure what you want on your phone right now I'm gambling I'm gambling I'm gambling I'm gambling she's in Vegas hello sorry I'm on the pod. You're okay. I just want to know what money line you want to bet on. I don't really know what that means. Oh, like, on sports bets there's different lines.

Oh, I'm just betting that the Indiana Pacers win. Yeah, there's a spread. Didn't they play yesterday? But like, look, you can bet by certain amount of points. You just want them to win or that's it? Oh, I'll do the two and a half point thing. Yeah You're such a tourist You're no degenerate. Okay. Thank you

Uh-huh. I don't think the Pacers are playing today. No, they play tomorrow. Yeah, how much you put in 10k 4k Oh, she owes me 4k She owes you money. Yeah, cuties owed me 4k because I had it cash and she needed to like pay rent. You need us to go like blow cars or something awesome? Yeah, she pays rent. You charge your bitch rent? Oh, not to me for Deco Deco. Oh, they charge her rent?

Like you charge her rent? Yes. Women should not be charged. No, women shouldn't pay rent. What do you- Across the border. Landlord's a woman. Landlord woman, huh? They shouldn't also be landlords. Why is that? across the board? Landlords and women. Landlord woman. They shouldn't also be landlords.

Is this controversial landlady? Let's take away women's right to be landlords. But also they get to rent for free. What do you say? Women? So women live at the rent fair from now on. And it's 24 hours a day every day of the year. It's like a it's an idea. It's like a pasture.

Yeah, they live on the they live on the range They live on the rain get all the grass they want to eat and all the ale they want to drink I don't I think wait this can work. I still get to eat the turkey. Oh you want I get to eat the turkey It comes a little bit. I don't know no suffrage. No suffrage. No cars. No suffering. No rent. No rent. No Suffrage no suffering no suffering. So who would operate the. No suffrage. No suffering. No suffering. Who would operate the machinery at the Ren Fair? Because we shouldn't let you know. Oh, yeah, I think I don't know about the machinery. There'd be a pet Nick Yingling Zoo. Wait, Nick Yingling like roaming around like a stegosaurus. Yeah. Yeah, which he just learned

about. And all the ladies can line up to pet him and they get to teach him a fun thing about math. Yeah, feed him gummy worms. Just the worst theme park you've ever been to. There would be the hit the sexiest tomato, it's just Nick and he's just saying shit. And if you miss it goes like, haha missed me! 70 cents or something. He said something really sexist. Remember the yard carnival? Yeah. 70 cents or something. For the dollar. Yup. He said something really sexist.

Remember the yard carnival? Uh, yeah. That was, Nick really loved this idea of doing a carnival. And I remember being like, I'm your friend, I'm gonna support you, whatever you wanna do, however you wanna live your life and be. Not how he acted at all. But I do think a carnival-

I actually don't think he lived to the- You've never done this ever. A carnival is weird. I always thought it was weird. It's, okay. I thought, no, you know what I thought? It's weird that this ever a carnival is weird. I always thought it was weird. It's okay I thought no, you know what? I thought it's weird that he wants a carnival so bad So bad, I I want to want it so bad. I think it would have happened You wanted it bad enough to talk about fucking I guess I was desperate

For it you were so hungry for you didn't get it. Now. You're mad. I guess I'm just fuming I just think that you like carnivals more than a normal person. I don't think you're fuming. I just think that you like carnivals more than a normal person. I don't think that's true. I think it is. I haven't been to a carnival. I don't think that's true. But you think about them, you keep up.

Wait, how many of us have gone to the Ren Faire? I've been to the Ren Faire. First time though. First time though. Oh dude, oh shit. Ren Faire's not a carnival. Destroyed. Carnival of God.

It just yields carnival. No, it's much more racist than a carnival. Carnival has carnival. It feels more wrong. That's not a carnival. That's not a carnival god. It's just ye olde carnival. No, it's much more racist than a carnival. It feels more wrong. That's not a carnival by the way. There's no rides and there's no carnies. I'm not a carn head. It's like a sexy carnival. All I know about the Ren Fair is they strut you up and then big breasted women feed you drinks of alcohol.

Are you allowed to say that? And they say, glub, glub, glub, you're drinking it all so good for mommy. They do that. This all happens. They do that. And people love that. And the beer, I have to imagine, is more expensive than like a fucking Dodgers game. And warm.

No, it wasn't. The drinks weren't that expensive. Oh. What? Not the beer, but I saw the prices. Okay. Oh, they weren't that expensive. So you took notes of the details at the Renaissance Fair.

I have a little autism. I saw a number and remembered it without any effort. Yeah, it all happened. I didn't read Dr. Noodle's post. Is that autistic? Reading the post? I read the post. No, I'm not reading the post. I don't think reading the post is autism.

Remembering numbers, the numbers. That was a great episode. He explained stuff that we've never thought about before. I know, it was crazy. But you missed it. You didn't listen. No, it was awesome. I went to his- You guys gotta tune in to the Primo for cool shit like that.

It was a great episode. It was a great episode. We told a doctor to talk about autism. It was great. It was amazing. You guys gotta get on that. Phantom tax the pussy? Are you kidding me? Phantom tax that puss. What the hell? Do you have no idea what we're all about?

Hashtag eating like an agent. Okay. Yeah. Yes sir. Yeah. The pussy are you kidding me? Phantoms text that pussy What the hell do you have no idea what we're all about? Okay Yeah Yeah Bottom like agent Bottom fragly agent Why did you get drafted into The streamers university?

Yeah why didn't you? Did you not get accepted? I don't think I applied. Brother you gotta start from there I didn't apply Wait did they let Did they let people like you in. Hmm if I applied maybe yeah I mean extra Emily. If you're a big streamer are you are those some of the people that are participating? Yeah, there's professors and then there's students and the professors were the bigger streamers and there was like a dozen of them extra Emily got in Oh, you have taught come in your pants in your sleep 101 yeah, or you think I would talk about that A dozen of them extra Emily got in What would you have taught? Come in your pants and your sleep? Uh, 101, yeah Or, do you think I would have talked about that?

What else are you gonna talk about? I have meningitis I thought you were gonna say I have meningitis What the hell was that? I have meningitis You're coming slipping but I have a lot of knowledge I'm very smart about the streaming stuff What would you teach? Real shit

I'm Challenger I'm Challenger Challenger is Twitch Challenger? Chall teach real shit? I'm challenger. I saw this twitch Okay, okay challenger. Yes. I'm challenger. He's challenging I think you were challenger in a plumber season were you challenger in no three surely all the professors at streamer you are Challenger and streaming I Don't know you can't be a professor. I'm fucking child. I don't know to tell you I'm childers. I'm not Matt kill yourself I think you might have have some elo decay Fucking child, I don't know what to tell you I'm child. You're a master's. I'm not Matt Kill Yourself. I think you might have had some elo decay.

I don't have any elo decay man. What does it mean if you went and played Dota for a fucking four years or whatever you were on YouTube for? What the hell does that even mean? You know what I'm saying is you went and played a different game. Yeah yeah yeah. What? You played a different game cocksucker.

He became divine at Dota. No that's so impressive. What do you think I'm doing now? You're splitting your time between two games. Between two games? YouTube and Twitch. But they're all, it's the same game. You're separating the games, it's the same game.

I'm saying you quit Twitch. You started working for YouTube. It's not just League again. Challenger players are like a dime a dozen now. No, but the streaming is the part that you get the rank in. It's not Challenger in streaming. Yeah, it's not like it's not like like maybe those are regions. Right. Like a Challenger kick player is not going to hold up

to a Challenger Twitch lobby. You're on like EU East, mogging everyone on YouTube besides speed. Yeah. In the Japanese women. Who do you think will be the first streamer to stream on like Netflix? I think that's coming. That's probably his dumbass. I don't think it's coming. He would sign that shit.

And by the way, there I would argue there's already someone streaming on Netflix. Jake Paul? No. Wait, who's already streaming on Netflix? John Mulaney. Like it was like a show. What does he play? He does a live stream. He's just like a live stream show Mario He does like a weekly live stream show yeah, I mean you know I mean, but that's how they'll do it Yeah, I mean like you know what the fuck Dude imagine Netflix chat. Oh Be the most insane normie. It'd be like extreme east

Oh, it'd be the most insane normie racist shit. It'd be like stream east chat. It would be like the end words spelt out with the emojis. I'm not gonna do a chat. What they would do is just the emoji. So like you could just click the emoji on your remote and react. But you're not gonna have somebody who's like typing out like, wow, awesome gameplay. No. Dude, they'll be pasting slurs with the emojis. Black Mirror should live stream on Netflix and it should be like thought-provoking and fucked up

And here's what it does black mirror. It just records you watching It's a cycle and you can react you're the fucking you can fucking react and you're the fucking you're the entertainer It's like the big black mirror and the black mirror is the phone screen Well by me you're jerking off to porn. You know what I found out when someone told me this is that, I might have said this before on the pod, like you saying the mirror is your phone screen, is that dating simulators, instead of using a black screen when they change screens, they made it a different color that is not as reflective so that the person playing didn't see themselves

in the monitor and get taken out of the sex fantasy. The YouTube short because it's a great YouTube short. No, all yours. OK. Just before I get a rock hard during the transition. They generally. Yeah. And then you see yourself, your own shaving mug. We should make a dating sim. And you have to get Aiden to hear you and go on a date with you.

But he's distracted. Huh? Do you be like five dollars? It's like a silent voice about the deaf girl in the anime. But it's Aiden and he's not deaf. Mm hmm. You think he's dead. That's the plot twist. The whole time. It's a 90 minute movie. Eighty seven minutes. You think this boy's deaf. And at the end, he just goes, goes with how long are dating simulators?

Usually as long as L really yeah, I would say like 10 plus hours 10 hours of dialogue. I mean depends how quickly you read but yeah, you have sex in them depends I would argue on what dating sim you get there's definitely a lot that have I thought it depended on me I know performance that I would argue the more popular ones don't is there one that's only but Yeah, it's like the pussy is like this is the easiest game to make it is just like a bunch of fucking multiple choice little If statements, I had to mod pussy into my favorite dating sim Now with pussy I learned C++ to add the Art Now with pussy mop. I learned C++ to add pussy to my favorite game. It's just getting the expansion.

It's like static art. This is easy. I want to do that. I'll do that. You want to do- you want to make one or play one? I want to make one. Do you want to make one about us? Do you want to make one about butts and pussies? I want you. It's butts only.

Okay. You got that fucked up haircut. Right. And- ooh, one of the dates can be take Aiden to get a haircut. And it could go horribly wrong. It's not that bad right now. It's not great. I don't love it. Yeah. I don't love it. Why don't you care? Honestly, you just have to care. He's on top of the world. It's a lot of effort. No, he's not bro. He was a mess at basketball. Oh How was he be? This boy was throwing me passes like a fucking drunk Drunk man, that's it. I was a little man out there. I was a little wasted on the court

I went to dr. Noodle slams engagement that I'd fly back early. Dr. Noodle slams you didn't say that dr. Noodle slam Yeah, he got engaged. I heard he was a rager. I flew to Wisconsin people do like drinking they rented out a rec room in Wisconsin. They're fucking chugging me. You're walking at the bowling alley? I said, Dr. Noodle slam fucking inspect my feet. Inspect my fucking feet here. Dude, I'm actually concerned about my ankle still.

What'd he say? He said, I don't know, fucking sprained ankle take a long time to recover. That's the problem with Sam. He's like, I don't know. Sometimes it's just, it takes time. That's all doctors. It's not just Sam. Every doctor is like that.

Yeah, I don't know. Fucking come back when something's really wrong. We were getting driven around. We were doing kind of the Milwaukee neighborhood tour and my friend Ian, who I used to live with, is Sam's friend from high school. And he is also the guy who did a bunch of the dev work on our Minecraft server, and he drove us everywhere. So we're like going to stop at a new parents house Go to a Minecraft server Hmm? Sorry go ahead

The yard Minecraft server? Yeah I've heard of it Do you think you're cool when you're like this? The one that you played on? The one that you played on I shouldn't ask questions, that's my bad That's my bad for asking questions He used it

My bad Where little Josh follows you around No do the Kelby face That's the Kelby face's my bad for asking questions. Is it? You used it. My bad. Where little Josh follows you around. Don't do the Kelby face. That's the Kelby face. Kelby does that face now. You're so to the side. I hate the Kelby face.

Your mouth almost. Don't do that face anymore. You're ugly when you do it. Oh my God. Your face is gonna get stuck like that. Okay. Dude. And when you get in the car, the same song loads every time, which

is Fortunate Son, every time you get in the car, because you have to have one song saved on like actual iTunes to get it to recognize an iPhone because it's so low, or so old, and literally every time we got in the car all weekend, which is probably about 20 times Fortunate son playing me two seconds over and over That is so every time you get in the car whatever you're talking about it's immediately punctuated by fortunate son of acts volume We're the worst song you can know that's a good get in the car song By the 50th time you're playing it, Amy, it's it. I'm losing Brights. That song was in the in the airplanes in battlefield Vietnam.

The game shipped with songs on it and you could put on the radio while you're just like gunning people down is pretty cool. They couldn't they could never do that shit now. They'd have to call it. They pay fucking seven million dollars to gun people down. No, to put Rolling Stone. Also that to the hockey. They pay so much that shit now. They'd have to call it- they'd pay fucking seven million dollars for fucking Rolling Stones shit. To gun people down? No, to put Rolling Stones in a fucking cockpit. Also that too though. They pay so much now for that. Well it's in CP now.

Which is just the currency- it's the currency in Call of Duty. It's call points or whatever. Is it actually? Yeah, that's what we're- con points. We did a whole bit about it. You're behind on that one? I'm just learning about it. I blocked that game out of my mind, I hate it. You can't hate it that much can't hate it that much. I hate it that much. Why don't we play on the same team?

Dude, I got a good idea for next PSL. Halo only. Oh my god. It's Halo night. That is crazy. Why did they make the letters so big? You don't even read Call of Duty on it. You just see CP. They kept this?

Yeah, it's the same game to this day. It's a crypto, you can use it on all sorts of dark websites. If you want Nicki Minaj, you must use CP. With your CP you can enhance your experience. Use their CP to unlock tiers and instantly access epic content. I wouldn't call it epic. Yeah. I'm gonna go. You guys get mad at us when we do this fucking bit. It's right there.

That's crazy. It's the craziest game in the world. Yeah, and that's the game you love? It's in giant letters on the coin. That's why I hate this game. You want me to not make jokes about CP. That's why I hate this game so much. I got into CP a long time ago.

Things have changed. I hated it the moment I saw it. Did you? The new stuff is in bad taste. I'll tell you what. We it. Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did Would you put that real gun in your mouth? Here's the thing, Halo always- There's like seven COD games and there's one fucking Halo game we play. We play Halo, there's gonna be 70 people there, bro. Wait, why can't you guys play in different- Oh, because they weren't on 360. What, uh- The other COD, the other Halo games.

Halo 2's on 360. We could play- No, isn't 2- 2 was on Xbox One. I just said that sentence out loud. I didn't think it was allowed to be 3-360, but 360 but it's just like you know there's only one to play why do you play FIFA oh I those count those count yeah wait is it like the fire emblem one where you're moving units around no no that's Halo Wars Halo reaches a normal halo I can't. Otherwise they would have put a number in it.

For millennials or zoomers, they think it's Alaska Halo. It's like three, then I think it's Reach, then I think it's ODST, and then I think it's maybe Wars was before ODST maybe. Some something like that. I didn't play Wars. Reach is electric. I'm just saying there's probably LAN games

on the Xbox 360, it just treasures in the ground. But you just want to play your little shooty game because you're a little violent guy. Halo also a shooting game. No, I don't go. You know what my only thing I do Treasures in the ground, but you just want to play your little shooty game cuz you're a little violent guy No, I don't go you know what my only thing I do is I go into the PSL discord just a roast Ying Ling That's it. We gotta get you out of there. You know the other day He fucking Ying Ling is like is there a way to mod Halo 3 to be 60 FPS? I've never talked in that chat ever. I see it. I instantly respond. Yeah, man. We'll just duct tape to 360 together Would that work?

And you know what's funny is Nick says Unfortunately slime is right. You can't do that Don't be some AI mod Scaling it'll be gross. It's just like you it's crazy that Halo is in 30 FPS on the Xbox 360 because Call of Duty 4 just isn't. Yeah. Isn't that crazy? Halo Reach, bro. Let's go to Reach.

You're fucking you love to reach. I love to reach. You are right. I like to. Yeah, I like fucking reaching to. What about what about Walrus? You. It's always the game.

It's always the game we're not playing that Ludwig says. That's the answer. That's the answer. That's the reason. That's a common theme with you. It's like, oh, well, if we were just doing it the way that I could win. And Nick is like, yo, let me fucking hold onto this game and keep it alive till I die.

No, Alex is also holding onto it. There's two of us. It's true. It doesn't make him more powerful. He is just following your lead. This was like his idea pretty much. PSL? Yeah. Really? He was like, we should get a bunch of Xboxes and play like old COD.

I was like, yeah, I'll do all the work and you can have the idea. I thought it was your idea to be fair until now. It was a mixture. It was a mixture. But I think it's fine as it is. I think you guys are big crybaby complaining guys. I thought it was all you because I didn't really know Alex like clocks in at the thought factory. No, he loves thinking. Yeah, thinking is easy.

He's a real thinker. Oh, yeah, he loves thinking. But when it comes to say edit something or do you open a program that manipulates video and audio is like that manipulates video and audio is like, ugh, I don't wanna do that. That's because it's not for thinkers, bro. He's all, wait, so he's all an idea, he's an ideas guy. He really is an ideas guy. I think he's cut his teeth on being an ideas guy this whole life.

And he's got awesome ideas. He's the Bobby Scar of- What's your genuine complaint? Whatever he does. Pizza, man, we gotta move on from that shit. Yeah, okay, that's fine. Salad night. Over the course of this episode,

you've said that the one thing wrong with PSL is like four different things. I'm just saying, bro, it's pizza every time. It's not good for you. Can I talk my, well, it's pizza once every two weeks. So it's like, whatever. It's not that crazy. It's all easy because you don't have to.

You just never thought about sweet green. Family's a form. That's what the problem is. Dude, sweet green, can I just, sweet green is ass. I like bowls of healthy food. Sweet green is ass. I like bowls of healthy food. Sweet green is ass. It's on every film set.

It tastes like absolute fucking garbage. There's no flavor in the entire bowl. It's so bad. I don't eat this shit, so. I eat protein bars and eel. It's like the most boring. Dude, fucking like HelloFresh, not HelloFresh, the other one. Fuckin' factor meals taste much better

than a fucking sweet cream boy So you want salad night at PSL? I want salad I be down for salad night the problem with with I think things I guess we get like a big bowl of Salad just a huge massive bowl of salad everyone walks in and just picks it. Let's get Kelly I don't know Where do you like a big bowl? Oh make it? Are you gonna make it? Butt up, butt up. Yingo.

Yingo. Do you want the greatest sound you can make? He's holding a toss and he throws it at the wall. No, he just tossed it with my hand. You don't want him to make it out. Is there a whole cucumber in there? Yeah, I didn't know I had to cut it. You said put a cucumber in.

All the ingredients you told me to put in. There's a tomato, there's a cucumber. What else am I supposed to do? Where do I get a thousand islands? I have to call Mr. Beast. OK, so he's never damn changed. This week, Kelby, Kelby asked to to go back to Montreal for a while. He's looking for some time off. And he asked me and Ludwig in a chat on Slack, if like, this is all good.

I'm the only one who responds to the chat. Yeah, let me just have slack installed. I say yeah, no, that's not true That's part of the problem is I wish that were true because then there would be a consistent explanation to why he doesn't reply I got it. I just don't reply to shit that don't eat me. He just replies sometimes I don't reply to shit that don't eat me. But Kelby messaged this needed you No, it didn't. Because Kelby says like, do either of you have an issue with like me going back to Montreal for a while during this like lull in events?

And I say, no problem with me. Ludwig doesn't say anything. Few days go past and Ludwig is messaging me about something, I'll say really important. It's sensitive. And then at the bottom of that section of messages, he said, also, Kelby can't go back to Montreal. We need him.

And then below that message puts two up carrots and says, serious. So I want you to imagine. I've read this. And this is off the back of something that is super serious that he's introduced the conversation with, which is rare to begin with between us and our DMs. And then signs it off with that a few days later. So, in my head, oh, this is urgent. Like I have to tell Kelby he might have already booked his flights.

And I message Kelby, I'm like, hey, I don't like I don't have a reason. I'm sorry, but Ludwig told me you have to stay. Don't book the flights to Montreal. And then Ludwig replies to me like an hour later and says, sorry, Kelby thing was a joke. I can see how that would be confusing. What? What? Are you serious?

Literally a directional arrow pointing to the message that says the word serious. When I there was two carrots you should have known it was a joke. Dude you're so fucking cool. I think you're so awesome. Can I now say my side? What could your side possibly be? Kelby was next to me.

Kelby was next to me and then I was like going through messages and then one of the messages is like, are you cool with Kelby going to Montreal or something? And then I just replied no. Next to Kelby. Did Kelby see it? Yeah. And you guys had a bit of a laugh? Yeah, we had a fucking laugh about it.

So now it's, we're going to go fuck with Aiden. And then I told Kelby, don't ask me I don't care just do your job. Right. And then you hit him. And then I hit him. Yeah. And then he went okay. He spanked his bottom. I was on a plane somewhere. God bless his heart. I hope he doesn't come back. He's gonna be so awesome. He's gonna come back. What? Yes. Why? Because he has work. Because he has to work here. But he can work remotely forever. No, that's not true. Sometimes he needs to be here for the work. Like what? Face to face with a client, like this weekend.

He can do that elsewhere. That's not how he faces face works. He's not the Sheraton. He doesn't have to come. You like when he's here. Why are you being fucking weird about it? I don't fucking like when he's here anymore. No, you don't. Yes, you do. You love fucking with Joey.

He's really in a Taco Bell right now. He stinks. Yeah, I stressed him out so much the other night that he was here at 11 p.m. eating McDonald's. He broke. I know. I shattered. Ludwig broke Kelby this week. He was eating stinky? He sent me an essay.

What? I shattered that boy. Good, good. I took him down from the inside. Okay. And I saw him the next day and it was like, it was like, Ludwig

Hey, I crush him The other night we were we were up here it was pretty late We're up here and like the whole building shook like something struck it They didn't feel like it we thought maybe it was an earthquake, but it felt different than an earthquake It felt like something hit the building. You know what it was and I said I literally was like, oh, I'm gonna go on the roof Maybe something fell from space. Like it's Elden Ring? And I didn't see anything, but it turns out I was right.

You were right. Because the SpaceX aircraft like fell back from space, and it like fucking went boom. Yeah. For real? Like all of LA heard like a giant boom. But it wasn't. My neighborhood app was going crazy.

But it wasn't on our roof. Right. It was just like the sonic blast or some shit. Yeah. What happened? They blew up, bro. It just like reentered. It wasn't a mistake.

It was like it like reentered or some shit. It was like, oh, was it the sonic boom? Bitch, I don't know. No one knows about science. None of us know shit about dick. I was just I was interested. So I was interested. I had something to say in the first 15 minutes of this fucking show about a red dick.

Oh yeah, Gavin Newsom. Do you think he's got a more tan dick than normal? A hundred percent. Yeah. I think it's got like the rocket. It comes out? Yeah. Speaking of dog dicks, Swiv was pissing me off last night. The dick dog. He's been through enough.

No, not with his dick per se, but just as a as a dog, I would say as a man. Swift is neurodivergent. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, and a minor. Cutie's out of town because she's hosting the red carpet for the AMAs today. So she has to go to Vegas. The porn thing. What do you think that stands for? Oh, that's not a doll movie association. American Music Awards. Right. So she's hosting the red carpet for that. Slime. Oh, my God.

Cutie interviewed Asa Akira. That's so cool. I thought she did. And she gave a swahili that says Rich Off Dick. Yeah. That's so cool. I thought she did the and uh, you know sweaty that says rich off dick And I was staying behind to take care of Swift To do my whole thing. So I'm doing my thing. He's great the whole day pooping great eating great and then We go to bed and he realizes I think he was hoping that QD is gonna come back that she's not gonna come back Sun's getting low sun's getting low

It's bedtime. She's not there. And so this is this is 1 30 in the morning It's like a fucking tornado sign That is swift like non-stop howling. This is five in the morning. Oh, dude, that's crazy. Poor guy. And it continued through that whole time. Wait, which one's getting the best head?

No. Number two, Malone. Yeah, he basically just non-stop cried for her from 1.30 to about 11.30. Did he tire himself out? Yeah, he's sleeping all day. Dude, that's so funny. He makes up like, oh, I had a shift yesterday. That shift was great. Bitch boy, put some food in my bowl. I was so fucking mad at him.

I've never been that mad at him before. Was this last night? Yeah. That's why you came late. What if you just like picked him up and gave him like a shake? You shook him? Yeah, so in my experience, you kind of just shake poop out of him. He just excrates.

Yeah. Yeah, Aidan's been down this road. I tried everything. I tried, I was like, it's okay, buddy. I tried petting him. I tried getting more firm with him. I go, Swift, no more. We're done now. Yeah. And he just tanked it all and just howled.

Because when he howls, he's kind of deaf. He can't hear anything. Dude, we got to toughen them up. Maybe we send Swift to one of those like, like Andrew Tate men's camps. Or to West Point. He's 14. He's not going to West Point. No, no, he can fight Andrew Tate. Yeah. So you think he's too young to go to West Point. He's 14. He's not going to West Point. No, no, he can fight Andrew Tate. I think 14?

Yeah, so you think he's too young to go to West Point? He like does push-ups and crawls in the mud and then has like a fancy steak dinner. And then they talk about like why women are crazy. Yeah. I think he needs that. I mean, that would help him. I mean, he's definitely, he's overly attached to cutie. But I think he's just gonna be like that forever now.

I think a YouTube short, Sending that forever now. I think a show YouTube short sending my dog to hustlers University It's a 14 year old American Eskimo and they just send back like a two-year-old German shepherd To too soft Lisa stand on his own four legs We should give we should give We should start using like research chemicals on Swift. See, we can fix it. Can I pick the chemicals? Swift, we got Swift Ego Death.

LSD? Yeah. A little fucking eyewash. And he sees himself being born again, but he's an adult. What I realize is, because I took him for a walk and when everyone sees Swift they smile. People smile when they see that dog walk on the streets. He's a cute ass little dog. He's a cute ass little dog and he prances when he walks.

So I'm just watching people and their other faces are all lightened up. People smile when they see that dog walk on the streets. He's a cute ass little dog. He's a cute ass little dog and he prances when he walks. So I'm just watching people and their other faces are all lightened up. And you know, he can make a thousand people smile, but only one person makes him smile. Wow. That's it. Ludwig Oggren. No, no, cutie. You know who doesn't make his ass smile?

Artosis. No? The StarCraft Brood War player commentator. Swift does not care for artosis. You know why? Because one time I was tasked to take care of Swift when you guys were both out of town. And you guys were like, you can sleep in our bed. And I'm like, okay, because Swift doesn't, he chills out when there's someone in the

room. But what I didn't know is he hates the television on. And I fell asleep to a Brood War game. And then he stayed up all night and he was just shaking in the morning because of our Tosis and tasteless talking about an old PC game. That just scares him bro. Yeah.

He's not fully caught up on that tech. Yeah, he didn't really like rushes aggressive tearing play style. No, no. He thinks that it's like kind of breaking the game right now. Why is he like that, man? Why is he like that? You know, nature plus nurture or some shit. I don't know.

Can you fed him a lot of grape soda as a kid? Yeah. Too much sugar. Yeah, too much. Freaks out. Yeah. I've been giving him some chocolate like once a week for a year. So well that makes his bones stronger.

Do he ate onions the other day? Cutie freaked out. Yeah, it was actually bad. I was on call. Dude, I had to the other day, QT freaked out. Yeah, it was actually bad. I was on call. Dude, I had to go, when I heard that, I was like, surely we're overreacting. And then I Googled, can dogs eat onions, which is one of my funnier Googles recently.

And it was like, no. Yeah, like for real, no. It's like, for real, it's bad, bro. It's like, no. And then it's like, what happens? And it's like, yeah, in four days they die if it's too much. Yeah. That's pretty sick.

Four days? Yeah, it's like some weird enzyme that breaks down how their body functions Oh doesn't function normal, so it's not immediate like it's not like the swift ever had sex No, well, that's no way that's probably the issue You gotta get Swift some pussy. Have you owned a dog? Yeah multiple dogs have sex Pussy have you owned a dog? Yeah multiple did you dogs have sex? No suppressing I don't so I don't think it's it no cuz my dogs like they didn't need it because they lived such a Sexually forward lifestyle they were getting they were kind of experiencing sexual things through Daily life like what you know like what?

Fuck you talking about bro? Did you basically your ball? Yeah, like the peanut butter on the balls Monday Lapping up waters kind of sexual I think getting swift laid would should be top priority We do a lineup of white women. And Swift's can pick it from the lot. Swift! Three things, first off, we all know who he'd pick. Second off, he does not have balls, he's not as sexually active, or cannot be sexually active. You can be sexually active. Dogs without balls hump pillows in plus.

He does not hump shit. Does he have the penis? He's got the pissing part of it. Well baby, that's all he needs. He's only got the piss hole. No, you need the other part too. The balls? Do you know what a eunuch is?

Yeah. Do you think the eunuch's got nothing down there? What do you think they're peeing out of? Yeah, but I think they can still use it. Not to sex. Mental boost. Mental boost. No penis or no balls or both.

It can be either. It can be anything? But most are no balls. Do you know a lot? About Unix? No, do you know a lot of them? Of Unix? Yeah.

Swift? Yeah. Gingring. I was going to say Dickie. That was an onboarding. Actually, if you're going to PA for a lot of what you do, you do have to get castrated. He was like, yes, I Nick.

No distractions. It's so he doesn't usurp in any way. Yeah. Yeah. You can't be challenged. You don't want any counter sexual energy in the room. You can't have that. Yeah. Yeah. He can't be challenged. You don't want any counter sexual energy in the room. Yeah. He'll take me down a notch.

That's why Swift's castrated. I think this is a good idea. Really? A dog pageant? This is a horrible idea. What the fuck are you talking about? I just went through the reasons why. No, it's not for white women.

It's for dogs. Yeah, it's for the dogs. If this still wouldn't work, he cannot have sex. He can have... That's so fucking fucked up to say. It's just not. Nudered dogs fuck. They don't. Make it a bumper sticker.

Yeah, neutered dogs fuck. Nudered dogs fuck. At the bottom of your Arizona license plate. They just don't. In-sale dogs fuck. I think they do. IDF. Okay, we make stickers and we put them on the back of cars all over America.

Yeah, I went and worked at the IDF for a few years. I remember Mass is like, yeah! The IDF is a perfectly normal organization. I'm proud to support. Can you check, Zippor, if neutered dogs can have sex? Because I'm pretty sure this is the dumbest thing you've ever seen. Ask AI. Ask AI. Don't ask AI.

Zippor, pull up some videos. That's the whole purpose of neutering them. No, it's not. So they don't fucking bust their seed. Yes, neutered dogs, that's AI. Okay, it's not it's so they don't fucking bust their seed. Yes neuter dogs. That's AI Okay, let's find a real source. Maybe scroll down Yes cat cattle dog public On a train what is that fucking picture?

Yeah, obviously They say they don't wanna I ask you guys question? we did meet into the advice show and someone wrote someone wrote in about how they there they saw their dad's like Twitter like like homepage and Their dad was following like like busty naked latinas and they saw what their dad beats to awesome Yeah, it's kind of looking like they were debating in Nintendo's falls They were they were debating if they should have a talk with their dad because all of their like a lot of their follows are porn and they wanted they wanted and they but they also follow people from their real life. And they were like should I tell my dad that other people can see who you follow?

Yeah. How old is the person asking this question? I think they're like 24. They were 20. They were 20. 100% you tell your father. Or 25. Yeah, they were 25. You know, it's an awkward conversation.

I gotta say I saw what you were looking at that you thought was private well, but one thing that they said in the writing was there was a naked Latina with a big ass spread eagle That's what they said and I said now when I when I think spread eagle don't make this an American thing Anyone can do this. Oh, my God. And the American is not where I was going.

What animal are you picking? Then a spread quesadilla. Okay, hold on. No. So when I think spread eagle, I think about it this way. I think they're like sitting down and their legs are open. Sure. This is pretty cool.

But they wrote very focused on the size of the ass. I mean, so can you spread eagle from the back was me and Aiden's Sure, this is pretty cool. But they wrote very focused on the size of the ass. I mean, so can you spread eagle from the back was me and Aiden's question. Me and Aiden called it spreading eagle or sorry, spreading hamburger because we were eating hamburger because we felt like spreading eagle is a thing that we know to be the front. Is it a matter of perspective? Yeah, because they're still spreading eagle. Kind of.

You're spreading hamburger if you're observed from the back. No, no, no, if you're spreading eagle, observed from the back, we cannot really see your butt. You're sitting on your butt. But if you're spreading butt, then you're like on your knees. But I suggested to Nick, I said, like some poets have said, ass so fat you can see it from the front. That was a good point. And that was that that honestly was probably the part of the conversation

I got the most is Eagle Vagina. I said I said that's unclear, right? Can men spread that's unclear. That's why we came up with hamburger because hamburger is clearly your butt. And we said it's spreading hot dog when you do it in the front. Spread. Spreading hot dog is clearly the front. Why did you guys assign two foods when the original one is a beautiful, gorgeous animal?

Right. I mean, I hamburger makes sense. But why not? So you don't like that we're bringing food into the picture when we should be balancing out the perspective with another animal. A beautiful Latina spreading hot dog on the timeline. OK, spread, spread bear. I like that. Spread a little bear spread.

No, because it's a double entendre that doesn't. It's too confusing instead of interesting. As opposed to spread eagle? If I say spread monkey, what do you imagine? That is the pain, the whole- Yeah, I think spread monkey, I feel like that's from the back. It's interesting how that- it's like Kiki and Booba. It's interesting how we just kind of know which one we're talking about.

Spread monkey, now a monkey is- it's something that is hanging out Hmm when you talk about the mother monkey, right? Yeah, it's like you got your home monkey out I think it's like a bonobo situation like the ass is like it's wait which animal which if I say See if I say spread a monkey. What's the monkey with the fucking big ass that sticks out the proboscis monkey? Yeah, we don't call it that what's the. That's the proboscis monkey. Yeah, we don't call it that. What's the name we know? No proboscis monkey. You guys are worried about it.

A baboon. It's not a different guy. That's what he's trying to do. That's what he's trying to do. You're thinking of one the fucked up nose that we don't call it. Those aren't bad. No, I'm thinking about Rafiki. I'm thinking about Rafiki.

He has too many monkeys to refer to for this. He doesn't. He only knows cartoon monkeys. He knows three monkeys. Can you look up the proboscis monkey? Oh shit, it's a totally different monkey, man. That's a mandrill. It's a mandrill. So you're telling me there's more than one monkey that has pink ass out? That's a proboscis monkey. That's what I'm rocking. See that's a totally different monkey. God damn boy. He looks like Squidward. Yeah he does. He weird as fuck, bro. Good to know the proboscis monkey.

I'm not trying to know this guy. Dude, thumbnail face. Can we put a thumbnail on this episode? Wait, he's fucking in the next one. Oh yeah! God damn! That's what Swift needs to be doing, bro. He's busting down. He's doing it in hamburger style.

The question is, is the monkey in the front spreading rat? Or are they spreading monkey? Spreading rat is fucked up. Oh man. He's cute. Dude, they look like Star Wars creatures. They don't look real. Where do these guys exist? Probably somewhere fucked up.

It says Malaysia. Somewhere cool I meant. I like Gibbons, man. You're really saving the Malaysian audience there? Glutched. Shouts out if you're listening from Malaysia, and I'm not kidding, and shouts out if you've seen a proboscis monkey. And if you're listening from England, kill yourself. Yeah.

If the top comment is somebody from Malaysia that says they've seen a proboscis monkey before, I'll be happy. That means we have reach. Yeah, it was episode 200. You guys, Nick Ball was 200. And they were. Damn. Oh, dude, his balls look like licorice. You guys Nick ball was 200 Licorice his nose. It's so much more impressive in his day. So hard. Can you look up?

Can you look up lens cleaning air pump? It's so it's crazy. It looks exactly the same His dick is firetruck red. It's crazy how much bigger his nose is than his dick. You're right His dick is firetruck red bro. It's crazy how much bigger his nose is than his dick, you're right. It's crazy. It's exactly the same. Oh man. Yeah, this is for when you get dust on your camera. You blow it off. In that sketch we did with the monkey, it's actually all full circle right now. I asked last slime to handle getting the grenade and he didn't do it.

So I took one of those and I cut it up and that was the grenade. Yeah. By the way, I did do it. It just got ordered late. Like it didn't arrive on time. That's not doing. I have toys. I have toy grenades. I think that's not I just didn't check the shipping date. I just I just wanted to be clear. Grenades were sent to the house.

That's all I'm going to say. I hear what you're saying. Grenades were sent to the house and they were dangerous. Yes. But if I'm saying bail me out of jail, you got 24 hours and then 48 hours later, you're like, where are you at? Well, then I would talk to the cops and I'd say there's six grenades in my car right now. What do you want to do? What can we figure out? What can we do?

Like, what can you do for me? With 200 up, so we had a lot of fun. Yeah, it's going to end soon. What? What? What? What is? This whole thing, man. Really?

This whole thing, bro. He's going to Svierge. You've been tapped out since episode 100. That's not true. That's not true. Don't say it's gonna end. This guy don't even fucking... It doesn't have to end.

This guy don't even care about the show anymore. Yeah, he cares about PSL. If we needed bomb PSL to make him come back, I've always been here. I I'm I'm here to the bitter end. You are also here at the bitter end. You're we splashed towards. Amen. And I'll see more of these. We don't I don't want it.

They don't go. You want to do episode 400000? I think we'd become let's be brainstorming. You want to do episode 400,000? I think we'd become let's be bring some you want to do 400,000. You know that we would make it that far. You know that we would make it so you want to do episode 3000. We would be dead. You want to be 400,000 a week. Do we make it if we if we kept doing the podcast at this rate? Not even close. When would we get to 3000 at 51 podcasts a year?

Do you just divide by 50, bro? You divide by 52. It's 57 years. That's episode 3000. We can make it. Okay, so you can't zipper out, I guess. My dude, my Swedish finally came in handy. I got subject.

No, it didn't. It did. You yelled at some minorities or something. Yeah. It's like racist. I said, don't come to Schverian. Don't touch my baby on the sidewalk right now. And don't eat my baby. The same the same CS scam that I told you guys about

with the Ukrainian kid. And I decided to indulge. I joined a discord that I've been invited to again by a different group of people on FaceIt. And immediately the same thing happens. It's like three European guys and I ask one of them, the one leading the conversation, I asked him where he's from. He says Sweden. I was like, oh that's interesting and I was like, and then I asked him why do you live in the US but in Swedish and then the call

goes dead silent and then they hang up and kick me out of the discord server You fucking Julia Robertson them you pretty woman I know I know finally got to use it that's so sick Also, you gotta stop joining discords Yeah, I owe them I mean my metamask completely drained but But they felt stupid they stole your worthless NFT apartment. I didn't click any likes, man. It is weird how this keeps happening. You keep getting hit up, oh, it's because your inventory is so sick.

Yeah, but I think the fact that it's happened within the span of four Faceit games, the awkward thing was the guy who orchestrated the scam just loaded into the next Faceit game I played. Oh my god! So I was there, dude, Aiden was barking at this guy. Yeah. It was sick. Oh, cause I was like, hey man, hey what's up? I saw you blocked me on Faceit, that's interesting. Uh, what's going on? And then everybody else in the call is like, why are you like so mad at this guy?

And I was like, he just tried to steal my entire inventory. I was like, why don't you tell him about it buddy? And then the guy starts to speak up. He's like, fucking idiot. Like he's saying it in like a fucking Russian accent. And then I say, and then I just told him to kill himself. I told him, you should kill yourself, man. You tried to steal all of my entire inventory.

You're a degenerate fuck. I hope you fucking die. And these poor three other guys on the team, one of whom Recognized me as aiden from the yard. No way and I just plowed forward because I was like you just tried to steal my entire inventory I fucking I Shameless fucking idiot Aiden had that whole argument about what's worth like thing you're gonna break someone's arm or or telling someone whatever it was

Yeah, and now he's telling someone who wanted to steal his mask off to kill themselves Okay, we'll end the episode here. Oh, what happened? Hold it was for yeah, it was for total the reddit made on the subreddit people said you read a bigger chair, dude It's clean it was more told this week clean through. It's like broken. It's like a soup bone I think it was already broken. It was just hanging on by this way Break think it was you that's dude. Maybe that's a sign, dude. Maybe it should be done guys We're gonna wrap this shit up forever, man We're all done. Oh, don't tell me you're telling me.

What were you saying? We'll end on this. I had a bit of a crash out on the, so there has been a, there's like a scam call going around. Maybe not even a scam call, but it's like, in SoCal, people, like a bot will message you and call you and say, hey, are you a, say, it's Amy, it's always a women's name, with a local roofing contractor.

We're offering roof inspections at no cost. Want us to check yours? I get one of these like every week. And I hate it because it's like, they're getting my number from some sort of place and spamming me. So one time I tried to call back, or one time I responded and say,

please stop contacting me I hate this and they just don't respond but I get another one and this time I was like hey Amy super interested How do I get into contact? There's like alright, I'll have my partner Dan get some info and reach out soon and then I Got a message or is that I sorry I got a phone call But I didn't pick up because I didn't see the call But it's a real number because usually it's a callback bot So I said to this number. Hey, thanks for reaching out

If you ever if you or your spam bots ever contact me again, I'm going to fucking find you. Do you understand? This is not a joke. I am insane and angry with a lot of time on my hands and angry with a lot of time on my hands. Please respond so you know, so I know you read this message. They didn't respond. And then I tried to call them and the number didn't work. But it's really annoying. It's like the ninth time that I get that message. I just wanted to talk to the human who

is running this gam. That's really cool. Have they reached our sins? They haven't. OK, so so far you're good. But they never responded to let me know that I saw the message. Maybe they're just scared. Maybe they just want it out. Maybe they didn't want it out. Maybe they're really offering a service. My roof is fine. Anyway, subscribe to our Patreon and we'll find one of you and hunt you down in real life. One person from the yard will die from our hands. Think about how much information you submit every time you subscribe to the Patreon. We

have all that. It's very easy to find you. And we will. And we'll wear you.