The Yard - Ep. 219 - The Logo Drama Deepens...

Episode Date: October 1, 2025

This week, the boys talk about Ludwig ditching the podcast, Aiden finding about Indian drill beef, and how the yard logo drama has had a twist... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I'm going like you. You just play some Ballarat? I'm just trying to fire up some Oh, you're doing it all wrong. I'm going to play valet. No, you have put your, yeah, put the head hole on your head hole on the head. It's not all easy, is it?

it's not isn't it it's how harder than it looks weirdly hard yeah just put it and then you turn it around oh you're beautiful woman put your hair on the other shoulder so that the they can see your face

you did somehow make it oh you're chic Middle Eastern I did I never with the shirt yeah he did it in a way you know maybe I maybe I also did it that way

the Aki way I was trying to be sexy a generational hoeing by the guy who's not here right now I bet I bet if you're in your audio, you can probably just feel the weight gone. It's like... Bro, you can just hear the...

You just cliff playing, your car suspension just went up a little. Yeah, you're like, what's that about? Is there like more treble in this episode? What's the... Something feels off. Bro. He would... Guys, I know, and you're probably like...

Who fucking cares? Who fucking cares? You know what? I care. I care, man. Who fucking cares? He fucking said... We co-planned it

He said 9 a.m. before your flight Monday after Fast Boopsy 2 at fucking event He fucking messages at 815 in the group chat Guys, I fucking got too much shit I'm so sorry, fuck, can't do it Can't do the pod Oh, you're too busy for the podcast And it's for the podcast and I'm a whip dog

Because boy when I saw That boy's message started with the word sorry Unprompted I said It's fine I was saying Aden is the wife that gets the shit beaten out of her and then and then the husband

Ludwig goes I'm sorry I'm like this You know what's fucked up? You know what's fucked up? You know what's fucked up about that sorry is That sorry is only happening in a world where He still needs us to do something Like he needs us to be okay With the fact that he's not coming Because if we're like no you're coming

He's now in a predicament Oh God that would It's not like he fucked up It's all like he fucked up it's done right And then he's like, I'm sorry. He said sorry, so I'll make it work for him. Fuck, I want to see the universe in which we just hold. We just all join hands together.

We're all here. You have to come, bro. You have to come. Right? Like an hour before this, I saw a tweet, and it's Charlie Day on the set of the Always Sunnypot. Did you see this? That was cathartic. Oh, my God.

And he's alone. And he's like, when his tipper was not there, I was just, I was just. Just like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It's somebody, it's another show. Who, does that make Charlie the Aden of the podcast for them? Absolutely.

Who am I? I thought I was Charlie. No, no, no, dead ass. I think Charlie's me. Because, because Aiden wouldn't know how to turn it on and get it recording alone. Okay, that's right. So Charlie's got to be me. That's fair.

Well, and then Ludwig's Dennis, aka Glenn Howerton. Well, I've always in my head thought you were Dennis. but in the podcast, I'm not sure. No, no, he's Rob McElany. Yeah, because he's such a cunt. He's the big Chad with the plastic surgery. Yeah, he's got the plastic surgery, and he loves fucking soccer for some reason. Really? Your Charlie Day personality-wise?

And he has a trash bag full of food that he brings on planes. He does. Actually, yeah, the garbage bag full of burritos. And he's probably snacking on right now in like a $30,000 first-class flight ticket. Oh, my God. Dude, that's my favorite shit. I was telling people, I went to a wedding this weekend. And that's why I missed Fast 52.

And my favorite thing to tell people about Ludwig is that he flies first class, but he brings a trash bag as his carry-on. Oh, but he also books it the day before. And he books it the day before. So it's at least five digits, which is fucking crazy. Speaking of France,

which is where me and Anthony are going, is it tomorrow? No, the next day. You're on tomorrow. Tomorrow, bro. Oh, it's Monday. Fucking, fucking, I don't want to fucking go to stupid-ass, gay-ass France, bro.

I turned a corner last night. I also don't want to go. Fuck! This sucks. Ain't fucking bailed. Alright, no, you know what? I'm thinking about this on the way here. Here he! Here he! I was thinking about all the shit. All the night is that to the cocks.

Oh, if you're all the slime's wearing chain mail. I'm wearing chain mail. So, so fucking happy? Are you fucking happy, I guess? I look like the fucking Florence puke from fucking dune, I guess. His nipples are pointing through the- My fucking beautiful awesome nipples are pointing through it. Sir Bruno has come to the circle to Aries Grievitz. Ten things I hate about Aden, number one.

Is he fuck his balls are always fucking drained. It's always drained. He's fucking he does fucking L S and his balls are always And I'm like give me a piece leave it in leave it don't know no you know what Let him let him learn let him limit test. He's seen too much. Oh my god His balls are always fucking drained. Okay, he shows he goes to LS, he gives them their fucking the pumping of a lifetime Imagine I imagine Doug Doug quivering I feel like it's the left and right brain I feel like he's using two sides of him. One, Nick's right. Famously, we get Gaden.

They get it straight. They're not allowed to have Gaten. If you saw the guess we had today, Gaden wouldn't have flown on that show. Do you have Netanyahu on finally? Finally. Oh my God. I can't even, I can't even basking shit. You can't even, my balls aren't, hold on, my balls are only drained because my first, my first bitch said she couldn't show up at 9 a.m.

That's true you and I said I'll be there for you baby But I have to see second I have to see seconds at three He tried to drain his balls and then I tried to drain my balls for you Kissing L.S with the cum on his tongues Okay okay okay okay okay okay all right so funny because okay Okay hold on Our guest today was it Dan Benson? It was Steve Eismid who is if you seen the big short It's the character that it's the real guy that Steve

Karell is playing in that movie. Oh, what? You had him out. Oh my God, the guy? Yeah, and he was a guest on our show. And before we started recording, the other two are trying to explain the yard to him. And he's just, and I'm a magic. And we were, like, struggling to, like, explain kind of the, you know, the, the, the, the, perhaps

bro-y podcast that we've made here. You're trying to explain comedy to a fucking guy who works in a bank? No, but then it's like, it's like back to back. I just was hanging out with that guy like two hours ago and now we're talking about how I'm kissing him with come on my lips or something

and you know what I was thinking about this so so dude auto right before he left he was like dude this the website owner of the website domain company that we used to use

that we haven't used for years he just posted a selfie with Benjamin Netanyahu shout us at Monday.com I was like that's crazy he's like I know he's like you just don't have to post that and then I was thinking

if this goes back to that coffee shop argument we had a long time ago at that photo shoot where Aiden and Hitler would get along because Aiden is just so forgiving of everyone imagine Aiden and Benjamin Netanyahu splitting a cap. Oh my God You would be so nice to him and it's fucking

pathetic. That's number two thing I would not be nice to Netanyahu. You wouldn't be mean to him You wouldn't be mean to him. You wouldn't be mean to him. This is the real test. This is the real test. This is low key. It might not happen. We might have a line on a get Obama on that show Oh, Barack Obama.

And I was reflecting on this because we have a bit, not even a bit, a section of this show from a long time ago where we say, like, I confidently say, I'd ask Obama about the drone strikes. Yes. Oh.

And no one is like, and you are like, you wouldn't do it. You would not ask Obama about the drone strikes. And I was looking at the other two, I was like, if we ever have him on, you need to understand. I have to ask. Is it accessing a part of the,

world previously unaccessible Obama Obama oh dead ass I think we could get Steve Ivan Isman on this show

Steve Isman was he fun was he hilarious he kind of was fun okay he very very knowledgeable and fun and Republican

and I don't think he's Republican but he hates the gays he might be I don't think he hates the gays I was joking Steve slap shakes his head

I hear the chain yeah I was just shaking my head as I wanted to hear it doesn't go through sound effects Low key, I will say this. Chain mail guys, and back in the day,

must have loved this shit. Dude, it feels awesome. Imagine getting hit in the head by a sword and living and being like, oh my God, this stuff rules. Or maybe it's like, maybe it's like skateboarding. Like, oh, you're wearing chain mail while you fight, gay? Oh my God, yeah.

If you have knee pads at the skate park. Wait, wouldn't it be like, but everybody at the skate park has a helmet on in this scenario? But everybody's still gay? It's what is. Chain mail is pretty popular. I think here the real thing is that if you have armor you have money and armor's good because you can live more. Maybe when chain mail came out, they were wearing, one guy wore it and

everyone was like gay. Cringe. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like Brod, you're gonna wear. You're afraid of getting hitting the head with a sword. And then one guy got hitting the head like real crazy. Like it like split up like Kill Bill. And it was like and they were like we should wear the. Yeah, we saw Gort get his head, an axe buried into his head and we didn't like that. So now we wear chain mail. Now we were a chain mail. Even though it's expensive. All right, number three thing I hit about Aiden. Okay. So it's balls or drained. Number two,

he'd be nice to net in Yahoo. I do want to get through all ten. Uh, number three I think that's it. Did you think of, what did you want to say? I just started somewhere. I thought I'd get to ten really fast, but I don't know, I'm going to more relaxed there in my life now. And I'm just a likable guy. No, I don't think that's true. I think I do, okay, you know what I was watching?

Do you know that clip of the millennial saxophone dancer people? I know exactly what you're talking about. And that's a miserable looking clip. It's like shit music and shit people making shit things. Dude, but it's in trancey and you have to watch, you want to watch it. It is. And so. Do we find this?

Yeah. I don't know what to search to pull it up. That's my problem. Millennial. Saxophone dance TikTok. Isn't it a ska band? Clip. Oh, it's ska?

I think so. There's horns. And then the one woman, she's at the front, and they all, they do the dance. And then it's like, da, da, da, da. And it's, it's really cringe. And I was thinking, Aiden, so Aiden, let's say Aiden meets Naden Yahoo. Right. I mean Nenyao.

And I do my ska band. And he's like, hey, Bibi. And he's like, because they call him his, like, baby name for some reason. It's always so fucking weird. And he's like, hey, Bibi. nice to see you man he's like I'm on my way to see Donald Trump and he's like you know fuck a pig or whatever

yeah and so he's in the car and he's like hey check this out and he pulls up his phone and it's that Aiden because he's him fucking a pig or it's no no no no it's sorry it's the it's the scott dancing thing he likes that he likes that he likes that clip he's like this is my favorite

video Netanyahu on his phone scrolls past the video of him fucking a pig yeah well yeah obviously it's on there there's like There's like 10 different squares of him fucking different pigs. Fucking different pigs. And he goes and he's like, I like this. Check this out.

Because Aidan is a nice guy, he's unable to say, oh, that's awesome. He's unable to say that sucks. Well, Aiden, I ask you this question. He would say that's awesome. Even though he doesn't think that. But you would say that because you're fucking fake. And it's disingenuous. I think it's disingenuous to be that.

Instead, you should be like, that sucks, bro. So you might remember. You might remember there was a little episode recently where we argued about the lies for 45 minutes. I don't know what you're talking about. What is that? What is we wound up? Why don't we argue about the lights? The beautiful pop artist? Stupid.

I can't even think of it. It probably made it up. I probably dreamed about it. And we, and we delineated some things that, you know, maybe our problems. Each of us could deal with. Yeah.

And I think yours was getting mad at the manufactured versions of people in your head. What are you talking? I'm remembering that. Here's the thing, though, is I'm right. It doesn't matter if it's a fucking fake version

Because this has probably happened Someone has brought on a phone And showed you something that you think sucks And you go, that's cool Let's play it out. Let's play it out You're Big Ben, I'm Aden And you're the Uber driver And action

Hey, what ethnicity are you really quick Before we continue driving this car? Serbian And then he like checks a chart That's fine, all right Oh, excuse me, um, random question. I'm so sorry. Are you Netanyahu? Ah, that's me. I'm Benjamin Netanyahu. Oh, okay. That's so crazy. Um, yeah, uh, I do a podcast, so we talk, we talk politics. What's that? Um, it's like, is it like, nilk? It's like a music, but longer. Oh, Jesus. Can you, uh, hey, so, Serbian pigs.

So can you, sir, right? Do you please drive a little safer? Because he probably says Some shit like that Serbians Hey you fucking Hey you Serbian rat dog No Hey drive straight

No English Just moved here You just spoke English Um Anyway I was curious Almost two complete I was curious

If maybe You'd want to come On my podcast Hold and check this out Look I love this video Okay Do you like that

Um Bum bum bum Yeah I like that This is a place We can agree on That was a trick I pull off his mask Wait, who are you?

It's crime. I'm a chain mail. It's not Nen-Yahu at all. And I say, I got you, motherfucker. Wait, hold on, but then I pull up the mask on Netanyahu. Ah! No! Wait, but who's driving the car?

Yeah, and then the Serbian pulls off his mask and he's the same guy. The Serbian pulls off his skin. And then he's bleeding all over himself. And he's like, good. Yeah, so I genuinely believe that it's... What I'm trying to say is I think it's disingenuous. I think it's disingenuous to pretend that something is cool, just to be polite, when you can play the medium of it to let someone know, this is kind of stupid, but I'm not going to make you feel bad about it. I think this is... Netting Yahoo aside.

Sure. Fine. If you can put it aside. If I don't want to... Who I admittedly don't want to be chummy with. You fucking would. I think I think I have a genuine, maybe... skill of

I find something I legitimately enjoy in most things that other people are excited about. Even that video. Even that video? Because that video is kind of like this is, I literally watch this video today.

I literally watch this video today. I have the thought of why is this cringe to people? It's like, am I not just watching five people have a good time? Like, this is, this is, I'm glad that they're having a good time. This is fine. People, it is better to be the person on stage doing that than be the person who's bitching about it on Twitter.

Yes, I think, okay, the problem is that if everyone's like you, the world sucks. And if everyone's like me, the world sucks. But I still think that it sucks to just have to accept it because it's the Let people enjoy things thing. You know what I'm saying? I don't think it's a that people enjoy things type B. It's me finding my own small piece of enjoyment in it. Instead of my pie chart of looking at this thing and being like,

this sucks and is cringe, I'm like, I feel that way like 70% of the way, but 30% of me is like, this is kind of fun. And you just let the 30% run wild when you're talking to other people. I'm still laughing about the guy he created the fucking Aiden. What are you talking about? It's fucking Aiden. It's not a guy of Aiden with empty balls who's show me with Netanyahu.

Is that not lemonade stand in a fucking nutshell? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you know what it is. We had Netanyahu on and drained my balls or something. You don't have a guilt about your balls being empty for us. I don't, because I said I would be here at at nine. I said I would still show up at nine. Do you promise that

you give us the most balls that you can? I give you the best balls all the time. I do this show before lemonade stand every time I record. A full house piano plays. John Seamus, I'm sitting on Aden's lap. I'm doing it after. I'm going to love you forever.

Even if mom's gone. Speaking of mom's gone, he's going to fucking explode in a fireball. Dude, I everyone around the opposite. He thinks he's gonna die. And he might. Death is always around the corner.

That's the... You know what? Actually, I don't want to go to France at all anymore. I'm so over it. You know what made me re-think I want to go? I have to be there if he dies. If he dies, we have to be there. We have to be there.

And we gotta do an episode of the yard with his smoking, still smoking corpse. Yeah, with like a piece of his foot. It's weird to have the thought of... It's like two crocs. Like smoking. There's like a bone sticking out. What was that

Just threw Tears We're like What do you think That smell God I would be so Fucking sad

If he dies Oh my God It'd be so annoying It'd be horrible But he Because he was He was doing that Simulator

Did you see the clip Of him doing the sim And just getting in a wreck And just flying around It looks really crazy Yeah And I don't know We got to go

And Aiden's bailing Because he has empty walls Ludwig has crashed every vehicle he's owned. This is what I'm worried about. He has a bad track record with crashing vehicles. Wait, is it actually, I'm like running the numbers. Not the sandbar. It's almost every single vehicle in his own.

Yeah, I guess he's got no miles. Jeddah has been in a crash. Both bikes have been in a crash. Sandbar's been stolen, so that's kind of like crashing it. That's like a mental crash. It's a crash out. Yeah, it's an absence of. caring. He left the keys in it.

Yeah, that was unbelievable. I don't even think, I feel dishonest when I tell people it got stolen because... Oh, this is the clip. Because it had the keys in. Look at him fly around. Wait, did he just, oh, he okay, he acted it. Dude, oh my God.

Isn't that terrifying? No, I love the no signal. Oh my, is he off the map? He's falling infinitely. Isn't that crazy? That's what death is like. That's a really cool clip. That happens when we die. That's crazy. How did you crash that mad? To fall out of them

Lost control Josh men make you loose control You Slime said Ten things that you hate about me Yeah I got to two That things you hate about you

I got to two So that means I like you Mm-hmm You brought that up Because we're talking about Because your balls are empty A lot Being late

No no it's just your Charlie Day Charlie Day No My balls are just empty That didn't have anything It was about Splitting your time

Between us and LS And it's like You have this Like dad has a new girlfriend But does he like mom still. Well, you guys split your time between league and me. So the fuck what? No, we actually give it pretty much all to league.

All of it goes to league, bro. That's why it's seven and not six, bitch. He had to sit one in. And I thought about it. Here's the thing. I was playing all day. I thought about playing another and I was like, if I lose, I'm going to be kind of in a pissy mood. And I don't want to bring that into the pod. I just thought I decided to eat instead. And I want

to say I'm proud of you, but you're 35. You're 35. Fuck you. You're bald. Listen, by the way, I've considered. I've Seated the race to gold. Now, I know Nick doesn't feel too great about that because, you know, it's a concession.

Can you re-engate? You got back to Silver 2? It's not the point. It's that I didn't have the mental. I didn't have the faculties. And I hated Top Lane and I quit. I fucking crashed out and I lost my mind. Also, the spot's already been taken. I don't know if you've heard that. And I quit. And there's a new race. A new race. It's me versus cutie.

What? Like, officially? Officially. Yeah, she asked. She is a fucking bot. It's crazy. I don't give a fuck. It's just so bad at the game. And I'm bad too, but it's like... So the way the matchmaking works right now for this Elo,

you will get someone who has been for 10 years playing the game and is like pretty competent. And then you get people that have just finished their AI bot games and are able to play ranked. And QD is like on the more side of the people that finish the AI bot games. That's the weird part. Dude, I don't know.

I don't know what to tell you. She's bad at the game. She hasn't played a long time, right? Actively? I don't know. Actively, I don't know. Who knows? What rank is she right now?

She's silver two. She placed into it. Oh. Dude. Wait, so it's close. It's very close. And she's getting 35 LTO win and antenna loss. Oh, my God.

Dude, she had a session where she went, I think, four and seven. And she ended up. Yeah. She ended up LP. She has some kind of like fucked up like Epstein MMR that allow her to like

Just. I was at 552. So I was Me and Kitty were supposed to do part of our race to gold at Fast 52 Cuckucker Ludwig

canceled it last minute I drove I job all the way to Long Beach generational hoeing And even I got to Fasti 2 I said in the middle of day I said hey

there's rumors that Qudy's not even He doesn't want to show up Is that mean we're not doing it? And he goes No that's stupid It's definitely happening I was like oh okay are you sure because Dan's telling me she's not coming he's like that no he's wrong

and I'm like oh okay I'm staying then wow fast forward two hours he's like bro like I'm sorry but like and I'm like all right this is one of my least favorite things with with Ludwig making decisions because sometimes because he's boss man at the end of the day right he gets to make like final call on the way that these productions work if he wants to change something if he wants to shave something he can do it He's a creative mastermind. But with something like this, this happens a lot where you,

you get an updated piece of information about something that's going on, and then you bring it to Ludwig as, like it'll affect the final decision that he has to make for his stream. But he actually never got that piece of information like you think he did. Like, he doesn't have the,

he just thinks it's the old way because it's still that way. And then you're bringing new information and he insists that it's wrong. He does this, but it's, I don't know how possibly Dan could have found that info instead of Ludwig first. And I'm saying this happens all the time. This happens all the time.

I don't know. And not Ludwig. I don't know. Because Ludwig's busy, and I bet she told Dan because he's the guy who's on the phone. That's fucking why. Cuddy, when it comes to event planning, she knows what the chain of command is.

She knows how to disseminate the information. Well, I had a bunch of people, so I decided to, I decided it because there's people who were bummed out that the stream wasn't happening anymore and they're like oh I came actually I stayed late to watch that stream and I was like pull up a fucking chair and I played for a small crowd

of like six at some point like 10 people and at some point it's like five or six people you gotta be like one of 10 people in the world that's ever happened to and maybe like faker at like a land cafe visiting but it was exactly like chat

oh no not a bad not in a bad way it was fine it was fine they were cool but there was just a guy would be like Hey, can I give you tips? And I was like, no. And he's like, okay. Dude. They keep playing.

And one other guy would just be like, you know, and we played, we played the scrandle. You did the scrandle. Yeah, you did. It was just like Twitch. Wow. Yeah, I mean, well, Miles and Josh were going to go as well to commentate and they had to. They both showed up. They both showed up.

Josh doesn't drive a car, so I don't know how the hell he got there. I don't even know how the hell he got there. But no, Miles came later. Miles drove and then just to pick up Josh If you have to leave immediately Uh we man this guy The Ladovick hose every Busy busy busy

And the fucked up part is if he said sorry If he blows up in a fucking fireball It all gets erased The last thing we've ever said The last thing we've ever said about him If that happens is we fucking hate him And he owed us So we gotta be nice at the very end of the episode

Be giving me as we want for the next hour But at the end we gotta say one night It's like it's like at the very end of your life When you're just like And I believe in Jesus and I accept him to my heart Pascal's Ludwig wager Yeah Piece of shit

Oh my God Why do I like him so much man He's such a piece of shit dude Well I don't know I've just been I was wearing the chain mail I got you a Wood Ranch hat But I was fucking left in my house

I was gonna give it to you As a commemoration for your solo queue journey Because you went to Woodranch alone as well And the way you play league And the solo queue you made it But I fucking left it in the house Okay And everything fucking some fucking locale

I'm a lulcow man I'm a fucking lulcow I am dude he's the lulco he wishes he was a lull cow he wishes he was a lull cow you wish people can I put you guys on some game

I discover while I was in Canada let's hear the game okay we're tagging my mom was dropping us I went to a wedding in Washington State but it's on the border so we have to fly into Vancouver which means you cross the border on the way right

my mom doesn't have enough charge in the car to get us all the way to the airport when we wake up Sunday morning. Liberal car. So she drops us off. Exactly what was in my head. Exactly what I was going to say. She drops us off at McDonald's

and we have to Uber. Get in the car, Indian driver, and he's listening to, this is important. This is important. He's listening to Indian music. I don't know enough about Indian languages

to know if it's like Hindi or Punjabi at first. But one song comes on and I'm like, damn, this kind of, oh, this kind of rips. Like, and it's, it's like this insane rap beat with like guns and reload sounds in the background and this guy just rapping over it,

which I found out is Punjabi. Oh. And, and then it cuts into a drill, like freestyle, like UK drill in the middle of the song. I'm like, dude, what is this? And I'm like, I wonder, is this? And then I had, I know, I'm ashamed to even, think it that is this a little bit of stolen valor here like he's talking all this like

he's got you know a ton of gun sounds in this fucking song like this is crazy stealing the valor from who look at the song is called can you look at the music video it's called celebrity killer no I saw it on his phone celebrity killer that's a tough song by Sidu S-I-D-H-U celebrity killer is really cool and we just we should just listen to like 30 seconds of it just go to It's a great name if you play like Toplin or something. Yeah, it's about to cut into it. You just let it go. Dude, this is, this guy's fucking massive.

Wait, what's the feature? Tion Wade, Tion Wade. So this guy, Sidu Muswala, this song's huge. Oh, 146 million. He's a ton, like he's massive on Spotify, right? Like, he's all these streams on these songs. I'm like, this song's crazy, but I'm like, you know, leaning pretty heavy into the gun culture and stuff like that.

It's like, you know, a lot of rappers do that. Not a big deal. Sure. I looked this guy up. Dude, he was assassinated three years ago by an opposing Indian gang. This guy? This guy? He's dead?

Dude, he's dead. He died at 28 and he died to another Indian gang. And I was like, holy shit. Here I felt like such an idiot. I'm in the car questioning this man. And he fucking lived that shit, dude. He's the folio of whatever. That's exactly what I thought

I'm like this is some like who I smoke Punjabi edition I didn't know about any of this That's crazy There's such a big beautiful world out there For all of us I will say drill as a genre in particular Very plug and play there's basically drill in every country There's like there's even Australian drill

Which in there's and there's UK drill There's I think Chicago drill was likely the first It's just one of the it's just a tempo of be a style of rapping, kind of happens everywhere, often involved with a lot of gun violence. Yeah, even in India, apparently. I sent you, you pull up the image, I sent you, all this talk reminded me of a picture I saw today that I thought was really good. And, uh... Wow.

Dude, it's like, dude, if you told me it's not actually Mr. Beast, it's beans. I believe you, it looks like Beans. That's crazy, bro. Yeah, people just keep putting Mr. Bees' face on like fucking, like, does other people's pictures. Dude, this is almost exactly what DJZ made looks like. I know, yeah. Oh, okay, by the way, guys, uh, wanted to give everyone an update on the art in the yard of, uh, situation. So...

It's gotten... It's in a very interesting place. It got pretty weird, so... If you're not caught up on the saga, this is the first, episode of the art you've ever seen. Pre-Camp. Essentially, there is a small event in New Hampshire, an artist event.

North Carolina. Sorry, sorry, North Carolina, not New Hampshire. In North Carolina, some sort of artist collaborative event. And they have stolen our logo. And they've been using it for many years. Which is normally fine. Normally we wouldn't care.

But then we realized they started, yeah, here's that logo. We realized they started selling merch on top of, with our logo on it. We're like, ah, that's an art event. Probably shouldn't steal art to put on the merch. To me, it was also. So the idea is an art event.

Yeah, exactly. You're kind of in, you know. It's like, that's specific. You should get someone in the community to make the, maybe do a contest in the community, something like that. You want that. And then we reached out. And we reached out and we said, hey, we think that you may be using our logo.

Yeah. And we got a reply. So we got a reply. And so this, it's on the Instagram account. And whoever is running it said, we actually worked with a graphic artist and paid him to develop the graphic for us. If you could message me, so there's actually double space after the period, which implies the prison

is a lot older, which is a crucial. If you could message me where I can see that your logo can be viewed and with date info, I'd be happy to take a look. I instantly were probably the first episode of the yard, shingle bells. There's a picture of me laughing at Aden's gross belly. It's very funny. And I say, sure, here's the first episode of our podcast called The Yard.

I said, whoever designed your logo probably Googled the Yard logo and ours popped up and they added elements. We also have designed docs from when we developed it with the designer that we hired. I know it's just a picket fence, but it's one-to-one our logo, and it's a brand that matters to me.

And I said, also, genuinely, if you print out and feature my art at your event and send me a picture of it displayed, you can keep the logo. I said this, and then I send them... We'll show it all the art on the screen.

Yeah, and we showed it last week, but it's a great piece, and I said, this is my art. And they replied, So I see the similarity of one part Which is the fence It's the logo

Which is fucking great Which is the middle The only logo element Really Yeah the rest is just colors And text But our logo was created Prior to July 2021

Which we have documentation Of our purchase And the design From the professional graphic designer We hired And they said We are not mass producing Any product with the logo

The t-shirts were only For our local artists would you say that next if you're also arguing if you own it that that you made it first yeah i i think to be fair it's like maybe they are just doing for staff shirts or whatever so it's like they're trying to say like we're not selling a bunch of shit sure um but it is like if they thought they owned it they shouldn't they shouldn't care um maybe you're just hedging for the timeline that you you might not be certain about the timeline yeah um and then they said and no i'm not going to publish your art anywhere in a social

with our event, but thank you for sharing it with me. I loved that. I loved that. Because in my head, my first read of that was that was completely genuine too. You should ask, are you sure? I just draw another dick coming. I'm like, how about this one? I've made two, and you reverse the image.

And then so I said, can you show me proof of that? And they said, yes, but not today. This was a Thursday last week. The person who worked with the graphic artist is traveling, and when she returns, she will provide it to me, and I can send it to you. I said, okay, thank you. You understand my confusion at you saying it's from before our show, right?

What this would mean is that we use the same graphic designer who submitted both designs to each of us independently. So they, which also the designer we used had several versions of this. The design, it's a process. So I developed the logo with our designer, and it was like done before that date like significantly before that date

because that was just the first episode I mean we even showed it in the trailer there was like multiple different versions of it and there was like actually the designer that we used had a logo type that we didn't use a second designer created the type that we used

they actually didn't create it it's just a it's literally just like an Adobe font or something yeah yeah it's like a free to use Adobe font but yeah no there's just no it would be an awesome plot twist if our designer stole it right

Because there's a possibility that Because if they If they can find proof That in early 2021 or before They used this logo somewhere Right Or even I guess just had it Or no they have to have used it somewhere

That our designer could have stolen it Yes Which would be awesome That's a very fun plot twist It would just be so The likelihood of them finding the same designer It's so low Because I hired like a fucking firm

from like an Eastern European country that I searched for the days for. Yeah, the guy was named Igor. No, he wasn't. So they messaged me again. It was like a day later. And they said, we've been using this logo

since the beginning of our project almost five years ago. And I'm like, well, the art is almost five years ago. I have to confirm with the graphic designer where he actually completed the piece and where he got the image from. So now they're starting to wonder. it's so

ultimately like people have stolen our logo a lot of times people have Googled yard logo not knowing that we exist

because they're doing something yard related yeah it's just in two nouns and then it pops up and it's like oh this is a nice looking fence

because it's well designed logo the only reason I care now is because they're denying it yes now we get to be right I was on the street

I deep dive they have like I'm not kidding they have like 100000 Facebook posts like it's it took me

so long to get to the bottom because there's no like jump to the bottom or sort by oldest to just scroll doing so much longer than you would think I finally got to the bottom and they have posts like in 2021 and in 2020 but

the logo doesn't show up in any of their posts until September 22 okay one year after our show hit the market so there is a the final piece of this saga so far is someone sent me a message on Twitter and they said I live on the

island that does the monthly art in the yard thing, and I don't know how much the pot is influences, but in the past three days, they've been slowly taking down all the banners and signs with the logo on it. I used to pass like a dozen on my drive to Bojangles, and now they're all gone. And I think this person is in nowhere, because it is on an island. Apparently, it's like some island in the North Carolina coast where it's like probably affluent suburb nights. Send them the episode with Mr. Beast and say We're owned by Mr. Beast Company. It's that picture.

Oh, but it's still bark. And if you do not remove our logo, we're going to get Jimmy involved. We're going to get Jimmy's legal involved. And you're going to put you in a burning house. Fubbing them now when they're just saying directly to the person, you can put the signs back on up, just display my art. Display the, that's what I'm saying.

Just display the art. I gave them an out. Yeah. I gave them. You know what? We'll design merch for your event. We'll do all your events merch. will help you sell it.

Kind of... If you display our art. Display the art. This is a guaranteed stream of income. Is it not a little homophobic to... Oh, what's so... We're not going to be... Spend a day taking down signs

rather than just displaying a beautiful penis at an art show? I'm not going to display your art, but thanks for sharing it. Well, what if I come to the event and what if I do it at the event? Will you display it then? I came to the event. If I show my art at the event

in a different version of it, in a different medium... Will you then let me show it to you? you just go out of the art come everywhere to go if i if the choice was mine instead of spending a whole day working hard walking around town taking signs down i would just put the penis up just put the art up just put the penis up put the penis up you know we oh my god be so funny if we fly there and we like we're just like g men like suits glasses ear pieces and we just show up and we just pretend we don't say that we're fbi or any we don't impersonate it anymore

we just act like we are. And we're checking out the logo on like a wall and we're like, this is great. Do you know who was behind this? Who was responsible for? We're g-men, we're federal agents that are just interested in the logo. And we're trying to get to the bottom of who designed it.

And they clearly know who sent us. They start answering the question. It's like, can you say it into the mic? Yeah. Yeah, or we just say, every time they say something, we just write it down like therapists. Yeah.

No, I just, I just forget. a lot of stuff. They did that clip of of 6-9 saying he smashed his phone when the feds rated him and he had all his phone numbers written down on paper. And they were like, why do you have a bunch of phone numbers written down? And he's like, I don't like phones. Duh. He's like, I had Nicky Minaj's number

written down on a piece of paper. Sir! I'm dying out here, man. You've been eating dog meat every day and I know you're busy fighting this war on my behalf. Yeah, I had an axe buried into my skull yesterday. But I think you could have a more complete meal.

I would love that because this sucks. Are you eating dog because you have such a busy morning you know sharpening your axe and you're in finding your way? Extremely busy. There's too much to do. We have to make the arrows. We have to get the axe out of my head. There's not too much to do that you couldn't drink some heel.

What are you talking about? What's heel? Heal. Give me that. Give me that shit. Oh God. Well that's Hewle. What is this container it's in? Heel is a complete meal. It's inside of an awesome container. We don't have this yet. Likely a recyclable plastic is what I, if I

had to guess. And it has all the nutrients that you need to thrive, sire. What's a nutrient? It's, uh, there's some fiber in there and I know you've been, I've been seeing some wet poops in the, in the latrines, in the trenches. Yeah. Lord knows you need to clean those up. Yeah. So the fiber in there

I'll help you with that. That's a nutrient. I don't know what fiber is either, but this is really good. Well, there's 27 vitamins and minerals. I know that's going to also sound foreign to you, but Our Lord made those. Our Lord made vitamins. They come from the sky. Uh-huh.

Uh-huh. What is chocolate? Well, today, you can get Hewled for 15% off. Along with chocolate. And don't be afraid. Don't be afraid of chocolate. Order fire, which is coming next. With this exclusive offer for new customers only

with Code Yard at huel.com slash yard. Did you drink the rest of it? Yeah. It's a minimum of a $75 purchase to get the 15% off. So you can go to Hewled. huel.com slash yard. Hewled.com slash yard. Well, Hew is for everybody.

You can get your own Hewle so you don't have to drink and finish your friend's bottle that he was enjoying. May I use this vessel for other things? It's not a vessel. It's a plastic. I have chain mail on it. I can't hear you.

Anyway. Back to the episode. Thanks, Hewle. I was watching Seinfeld and I watched Jerry find someone's number in a book of phone numbers and I was like, the world's different. The world's different now. My mom had one too.

My granny still does that. That's old people shit. Yeah, she walks up to the phone because she uses the home phone, mainly. She walks up, opens a drawer, takes out a notepad that she stores all of her contacts and then types in the phone number from the notepad. What a shitty asshole, your grandmise.

Speaking of Indian drill rappers, she's probably talking to one three hours a day on that thing. I just gave a nice young man half of my savings. He's going to turn it into three times. Totally not to redeem, and I didn't. Grady, stop giving your RBC account number to the bed on the phone. I had to do a wire transfer? It was very easy.

I went to the bank and prepaid cards. There was 7-11. Oh, my God, dude. If my mom didn't die, I think there's, I think a lot about her trajectory of like, because she died before Trump happened. She died. She died most before Obama happened. And she didn't really give a shit.

She's like, life sucks no matter what, who doesn't matter who president is. like, you're right. My good bitch. And when I was like, I was thinking like, I wonder if Trump would have made sense to her dumb ass. Or maybe my dad, he, I remember he was in like 2020. He's like, I like Bernie.

Bernie's a crazy guy. I like the crazy guy. And I'm like, some people are just, but he can't, he can vote because he's convicted felon. So what are you going to do? What are you going to do, man? Can't do damn shit about nothing. I think I would have been happy walking. away from all this. I think I still would be happy. They could keep the logo if we could sell

their whole thing as like a tie-dye t-shirt. No, let's just do it. We could just do it. Why don't we just, what are they going to do? We said this last episode and we said the link is below and we never did it. We didn't do it. We're going to do it. But I do want to do it. We're going to put it in hindsight in that episode. Let's do it. Why not? He's all jeet up right now. This is guy who smokes. He's like, we should make a movie. No. And then in an hour, it's like, um, time. I don't know. I'm serious. Let's do it. Dude.

No, I know you want to, but I don't know if I will later. I'm going to be so tired, bro. Let's draft up their logo on a shirt and then send it in the conversation and say, would you guys be okay with us selling this shirt? And see what they say. What we can do? I hear, we felt bad and we wanted to give you a couple passes on a new logo and we send them back the same thing, but it's just undefeated.

in the middle You guys can use this This was one of our backup options She just types T.S. tough And then wilted a wilted rose emoji Yeah we'll see what happens With that saga I hope to hear back I'll be like sorry I'm in France traveling right now

Sorry we're taking our business to France right now I was in premium economy to France So Yeah My husband booked me in premium We're flying second class We're flying second class Oh the shit on my wrist

I'm not even worried about it This is a Seiko This is the Northern Live 400 dollar I got your weekly rent on my wrist Yeah Yeah I was

I just opened I just opened YouTube And one of the recommended Streams it was feeding me Is just this like live feed of the Manhattan City Skyline From like Queens or something

It just runs 24 hours a day To like catch another event dude and I was like this guy has got to be like begging for 9-11 a half again just sitting there just frothing for the day it's like a plane that's like flying above the skyline he's like oh oh like why else why else do you have that you're just hoping for a helicopter crash or some terrible event I feel like it's like there were I don't know people still do this they probably do but there was this like Bakersfield um police scanner guy who would just listen to the police scanner and then drive to where cops were and just hang out and just live stream

it and he was really the cops hated him yeah because they're like we're just we responded to this what are you doing here he's like I'm just looking and it's like it's funny for both like they're both like weirdos but this is like just just slightly more tolerable night crawler yeah yeah for 10 viewers chasing around and yelling at the criminal you don't have to tell him that know you're Right. Oh, my God, coaching? No, he's holding a cell phone at him. Oh, God. That's, yeah, that's just literally getting over-the-shoulder coached in a league game is getting arrested.

And someone's like, you don't have to say anything. You can be quiet right now. Those guys are so cool. The sovereign citizens? Yeah. They're really cool. It's weird because they have so much confidence. You got to be so bored and so wealthy.

No, they're, dude, a lot of them work all day. I don't think they're not healthy. How do they, how do they don't have a job all day? What do they do? No, because you can't. You can't be on that shit and have a lot to lose. Yeah, bro. Like, people who are wealthy do not fuck with the cops for fun.

I feel like they've got, they're sitting on some sort of weird trust fund and they're and they hate the fucking cops in there. No, it's people in like libertarian coded counties that just want to limit tests to the police. But it's funny because the sovereign citizens are so annoying that when the cops beat them up, in a way you kind of are like, yeah, you. you were egging that guy on but then the cop's also a cop so it's like you want him to blow his head off with a shotgun

so it's like it's weird it's like everyone you know is fighting that you hate the two least favorite guys in the world yeah and they're just going at it yeah but you know you know Scott our friend Scott yeah I know Scott you guys don't know Scott Scott we don't know Scott

we don't know Scott I always do this joke because I forget that you guys met him but he's a public defender and he says we've met Scott so many times He says those people that Pull the like the granular line by line sovereign citizen law shit They usually get off It's only when they fuck up their own And they could they convict themselves by accident

Or they like what do you call it? They incriminate themselves Oh yeah But a lot of times they get off So do I love that there's so many videos of those guys Are driving and the cops like you know I pulled you over And he's like I don't talk They're like like some

The window's like this The window is like literally like a piece of paper It's like the exact exact thickness of your license. And he's like, can you roll the window down? And you're like, huh? Sorry, no, I think, it's so funny. The mixture of like, can't hear you

and also I can hear you just fine to the crack. Uh, yeah, I'll put this as what? No, no, no, no. I'm not discussing my day. Then the cop, like, the cop goes like a step. They're like, I'm going to break the window. And he's like, go ahead, do it. Go ahead, do it. And they break the window.

Hey, bro, what's just funny are you doing? Bro, bro, bro. Which is, it's like both of them. It's like, yeah, why are you breaking the window? But I think the next level of that is peddle. file a hunter. Like the guy who's like, they've got the whole car rig ready for a cop

to pull them over. Like they're not, they didn't just start the phone. It's like they're ready to be filmed inside their car. There's three angles. It's like a fake taxi. The next step is the guy who, pito baito baiting and going to target. Yeah, pretty much. What is that? Dude, there was

that body cam of the guy, the cop who there was like a woman that he arrested and she's like, I'll fuck you right now in the backseat. She's like, oh, fuck you right now, I don't care. And he's like, you can't be talking like that. He's like, I'll fucking suck your dick right now. And then he just turns off his body camera. That's crazy.

Yeah, and then he had sex with someone he arrested, which is insane. He said, what? He got fired or put on paid leave. He probably got put on paid leave. If I was about to retire, yeah, you got to go out like that somehow. Having sex with somebody arrested and going on paid leave. You got to go on paid leave for that. You have to go on paid leave.

You cannot just go on unpaid leave. You cannot leave these people on paid. on paid leave. What are you gonna do? If you don't pay them on the leave, they just, they get out there, they start killing more dogs. Yeah, it's the fucking, they get all riled up. You gotta keep them paid. It's the, it's the, it's the, it's the All Sin Street Reaper, but he's only just killing people's dogs. He's got three little dog treats etched into his shirt. He's got three little confirmed kills. See, this guy, Bo I knew growing up, he kind of went crazy and he started feeding people's

Dog's poison meat. Okay. That helps no one. He had the hottest girlfriend. Oh my God. Wait, hold on. Hold on. What is poison meat?

Like, Minecraft? Like, zombie meat? He would, like, poison hamburger meat with some poison that he knew would kill a dog. And he would throw it over the fence. We make poison meat for dogs. It's called chocolate.

Just give him chocolate. Away from this being a perfect slime story. Like, if you is like, the hottest girlfriend. All this shit is true. And his little brother, Derek, was my best friend he was the funniest guy I knew

like that's we're one beat away no I think I said this before but the rumor at school in elementary school was that his dad drove a semi and so sometimes

some sort of rumors I know because we didn't know and no one was like he was kind of scary he was kind of scary I had to talk to I heard his dad

has like a really normal job yeah well no because like sometimes there'd be a semi at school and it's a huge truck it's scary

and be like, that's Boast Dad. I bet that's both Dad. That's not any more compelling. Yeah, and then he chilled out. He got way more normal. After poisoning the dogs. After poisoning the dogs. How old was he when he was poisoning the dogs?

Well, he got it out of his system. 15, 16. You got to crack a few eggs. Crack a few eggs. Also, I just heard this was going on, but it's a weird thing to make up. It is a pretty small town. So it's like this guy,

Colin. I remember Colin, this first time I heard the word socialist. It's because he was ripping a bong and he ripped this like blue genie bong. He clears it. And he's like, Kimball for Obama, bro. He's a socialist. And I was like, what's that? The amount of times that's been said after a bong route. It was crazy. But I don't think he voted for no damn Romney. I'll say that much. Wait, it was John McCain. But yeah. So, both turned out fine girlfriend was so goddamn beautiful and it was great

how'd he pull that he was just Riz that I kill dog Riz I think I think in a small town you take what you can get and it's all good man like he was

if his job has anything to do with like steel or wood or any sort of material it's just yes let's have six children strong hand women love your hands women love strong hands they love funny guys

and and they love fucking getting mad at their best friend oh and not telling them that they're mad at their best friend you know who else they love Clark Kent that dumbass bitch that dumb ass bitch who's not on the podcast right now he's off being

super man someone said in the in the premium that there was a Ludwig 1v3 clean 1v3 and I was like what the fuck are you guys talking about. They all, they all, people who watch this show, they hate when a group of right people talk to a wrong person.

It's their least favorite fucking day. No, no, hold on. I don't like that. It's literally their least favorite fucking day. I don't like that assessment. Because sometimes the one guy is right. Sometimes the one guy. It reminds them of their, they're both their parents being like, we need you to get a real job. They're like, what the fuck is this?

I'm being ganged up on. I'm being ganged up on right now. Dude, I can't even bask, because Ludwig fucking stupid bastard shitheads not here. I fucking smoked them so bad. I drove down to fast 52 did my job and left Can I be honest with you? I was pissed laughing at that clip

I watched I watched the clip The first when you rip it the first time again And I genuinely at the end of the video I thought he's born to do this I showed the clip on the first part I showed the clip on the stream and someone Someone in chat said Slime runs like an action figure come to life

Yeah someone said Someone said I run like Like I have a full diaper. Dude, I don't, I run so crazy. But the same thing happened with the Olympic video. I just,

I think after France, I'm just gonna get a fucking guy to fix me. I'm just gonna get a coach and say, fix me, help me run normal because I run every week.

You guys might be surprised. Is that the only thing he's fixing? What are you talking about? No, just is he to be focused on running? Go ahead, piece of shit.

What would you fix about me? No, go ahead. Go ahead. You know what I'd fix? I'd make your, Ball's full all the time for me. Probably they're running.

Dude, you're such an eater. That blew my mind. Because like, because like when you out and we eat food, slime finishes his food first. Everyone's, it's a classic slime thing. He eats his food first.

He might even leave before you're done eating. Like sometimes he goes, all right, I'm going home. And I'm like, I thought we were hanging out. But I didn't think that

that necessarily translated to competition. The fact that no one in that group, those were the people who volunteered. They thought, I could eat pretty fast. They're like, I could probably eat pretty fast.

You're an eater. What? is that? When did you learn this? Have you always had it? I've always eaten really fast. It's a great question. Thanks for asking. Uh, it's like four microphones that say like Fox and CNN. Yeah. It's shutters going up. Mr. Slym. Yeah. So I've always eaten really fast. Here's the thing about hot dog eating. And let me break this down. I've eaten four now very competitively, very fast. In my life. And eating the hot dog meat shouldn't take you very long. You chew it. and you fucking swallow it.

And I don't know why that's hard. It would take me a while. The bun slows you down. That's why you, when you put a bun in water, it essentially turns into liquid and you can swallow it like water. That's the trick. But if you do it too much,

if you soak it too much, it falls apart in your hands. And now you have a situation on your hands. There's a balance. There's a balance. But I could probably eat 10 raw hot dogs in like, I think less than 20 seconds.

Wait, 10 hot dogs? 10 raw hot dogs. I think you could do it in less than 30. Wait, wait. No way. I promise you like good. The same size? Nick, I promise you.

Are we gonna bring doubt to the eater? I think you'd do it in less than 30. I'll Uber eat them right here. Less than 30. I'll order them and they'll get here before the episode's over and you can do it right now. 10 of them do it.

I'll do it right now. I'm not kidding. That's a lot of hot dogs. That's a lot of hot dogs. We got like 30 minutes. We have 30? Oh, we're fine. Or we can do it on the Primo.

Uh, up to you. Pay wallet. You know what? Just fucking order it and we'll see. But I can't... You want to watch to meet 10 hot dogs, Patreon. Oh, yeah, yeah. We'll do it on the Patreon.

I can't stress how confident I am. Boy, you said 20 seconds? 20 seconds I could eat 10. I'll throw it up right away. I don't want to eat them. It's too much salt. You're just going to throw it up? Yeah, just to show you guys.

It's like a magician. Okay, and now... And now the prestige. And then I eat 10 hot dogs. Shimling. pulling, he's like, he's like, blowing vape smoke on his sleeve and like a little hot dog comes out. It's like cut to Penn and they're like, he's doing this and a hot dog is just emerging from thin air. Yeah, dude, the last, when I saw Shin Lim, he had like some American Idol guys sing a song on stage while he did magic.

But what if I'm there and I'm just eating hot dogs on stage tonight with Shin Lim. You would be slime. You would be a. dope opener. Like if we got you to like open a baby no money show or something we call in like one of our favors and it's like now slime eating 10 hot dogs in 20 seconds. That'd be so

crazy. Oh, that is such an insane thing. It's funny too because if you do something like that on a stage there are people in the crowd that just want to fuck you. It's so... Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just like the human condition of like, well, that guy's important. If you do anything on stage, you can have sex after.

Yeah. Anything. Anything. It's wrong. Anything. Anything. People were trying to suck Charlie Kirk, damn dick. Mm-hmm. And now he's getting his dick sucked in heaven. Yep.

I was getting dick sucked by the Lord. And now he's getting dick sucked by the Lord. Because he was such a good Christian. Because he was such a good damn Christian. Now the Lord is sucking on his dick. I was like, when I rolled up, when I rolled up, I opened the gate and Anthony was outside. He was like, Mr. Wayne.

and I was so shook up I was so shook up I was like well my balls were drained from lemonade stand but I got to the door and I was like Alfred in my head

I was like Alfred I need you to come in and beat me off I need to Alfred I'm gonna need to I need to come in the next 30 minutes dude I bet Alfred

gets really good at what he does oh yeah I guess I'm just a fucking why you're just a pale bail on fucking France oh

to make you sad. Yeah, we want you to come, man. I want you to come. Don't, no, don't do that. You know what's funny is we don't even have a place to stay yet. What? We don't have a place.

We got to fucking figure it out. Airbnb cancel my account. I don't know why. At Airbnb, there was a place that was like gorgeous. Like literally the most gorgeous place. It was the cheapest place on Airbnb. Yeah.

I was like, I don't understand. It says it houses 10 people. It's on a lake. And it's like so abusive. I'm like, we're obviously booking this. It's cheaper than everything else. everything else was so butt-ass book it the guy's like it's not available

I'm like well that's why it's up because people probably keep trying to book it and it's not available you are not allowed to sleep in the residence once America we'll see maybe we're gonna have to fucking they fucking cancel my Airbnb

I don't know why I got an email they said we're closing your account I haven't used it in a year I didn't do anything wrong I'm not turning tricks like that fucking woman outside the fucking inner shack that she made not even made up I was at the wedding and I looked at my phone and I saw you said that I showed it to

Wait, it's a woman turning tricks? Yeah. Women in STEM. This is good. Yeah, dude, it's fucked up. It's this new homeless woman that's near the encampment that is near our studio

and she built a house very close to the studio. The closest house. I want to be so clear, this shit's not a tent. It's not a tent. It's a structure. It's a house.

There's like, Somehow she found like a big door. Yeah. There's like a door. But basically there's always like two guys standing outside kind of waiting. And they're always looking around. So she's either selling drugs or she's turning tricks. And I don't think she's selling drugs because I don't think, I don't know.

If you watch the podcast and you're a cop for every, the 40 feet vicinity around our building is the gay zone. And if you show up in it. And if you show up your. And there's like, there's just, there's no. dogs here. So it's like you wouldn't even want to come. There's that little one. They're going to turn it into a blood state. He's not. He's not here. They are

going to a satellite strike that little dog. Oh my God. Yeah. Calling and reinforce them. Oh my God. There's two dogs. There's a grown cop and folk ear. Just like one of the dog. There's this, there's two dogs. One was a puppy. One was bigger and older. And then the same

breed. And the little guy for a while last year was just fucking on the other dog a lot in our neighborhood found out that's his mom no way he was fucking his mom

he's fucking on his mom oh my god found out from the neighborhood that that's his mom it was so funny because the woman who told me this came out of her building and she was looking at it

and she's like she's kind of shaking her head and looking at it And she was just like, and then I went over to her to talk to her about something else. And she's like, they just shouldn't be doing that. She's right. What do you want me to do? Dude, oh, that sucks.

There was a homeless encampment that it was near my girlfriend's house that they had chickens. I think they were slaughtering chickens. They were selling drugs. And I don't think they were turning tricks because there was nowhere to do it. But there was, like, there were security guys. It was funny, like, guys that work security for, like, casinos or shows, they come up and they're, like, their safety vests. Yeah.

And they come and they show up, and then they leave very quickly after putting something in their pocket. I'm like, all right, he just copped. But there's also chickens. Like, these people are raising chickens and I think slaughtering them, which is kind of crazy. There used to be the RV that was here for a long time. Arvie was here for a long time. They were selling meth out of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And they got pulled. Yeah, the cops were cracking down a bit. Have you noticed? Mr. White, he's fucking his mom, Mr. White. Mr. White is not cool. It's not right. Mr. White. Mr. White shouldn't be doing that, Mr. White.

Just let him fuck his mom. Fuck who we want. I am the one who fucks. I'm the one who fucks my mom. We needed to I need to lay in this plane. I need to There's no blame, bro

They're fucking, the pilot's gone I don't know No I was making this joke I was making this joke Dude our neighborhood's going to shit man Because Not because we have much homeless people We've had homeless people

The whole time They've been here long before us They were so Everybody who lived around this building It was a bit of it It was a very nice chill community They have nicer cars than Nick Gingling And it's something

And then some change in the last six months. I don't know what it is, but all of a sudden, the, the packages started getting stolen, and the cops started arresting people and pulling cars. What happened to the old, the old nice encampment that I used to know? So I think what the encampment did wrong

is they would have really big bonfires. I'm realizing what the problem is. That was a problem. No, no, no. I'm realizing what the change is. The ice cream truck stopped coming. Did it? You're right.

The ice cream truck hasn't been showing up to the office. You're so right. No, it was at the school. It was at the school like a little bit ago. No, but it doesn't roll around here. It used to roll through our street. Yeah. And you hear the music and the ice cream truck's here.

Everyone's probably, crime rate going up. Dude, is that, is the ice cream truck the harbinger of order and peace? Yeah, everybody has a reason to live. That little SpongeBob ice cream with the fucked up gumball eyeballs. Yeah, he's all melting weird. That's why I said that guy's dick looked like on the subreddit. I thought that guy

Aiden and Lemonade Sand interview would kind of look like One of those Like sandy cheeks They did They need turn Ned and Yahoo And the one that melted Sonic ice creams

Mm-hmm You get that guy Dude that was when I won the hot dog race It was funny Because right before that There was You see the donations for Fast 52 Which was a great event by the way

But I'll never tell Ludwig that Because he's not fucking here True And instead I was sitting there Just waiting for the hot dog To start And it just said

$250 arrest netton yahoo and i know what they wanted to say yeah because the thing on twitter is netton yahoo that's what that's what everyone says this is go and this is a thing on well that's the thing on twitter that's the hashtag but they couldn't put that probably because there's some sort of fucking draconian language filter and uh but after the hot dog race i said arrest then yahoo and i saw you say that kelly came up to me after he's like so that one's a bit tough. And I'm like,

all right, man. Ludwig at the UN meeting. Can we all just fucking get along? I don't know. I think we should all just be pogged. Yeah, the United Arab Emirates guy at the UN Security Council. He's like, who's the fucking fat guy?

Maybe love is the glue. He's not the fuck. I mean, he's somewhat. Maybe we need love. Dude, we've been gooning on fucking League of Legends for a goddamn week straight. We fucking sell. We're goons. Don't say wait.

No, me and him. I'm not talking about you. Don't say wait. I'm a good boy. I don't give a shit. You're not a good boy. You run it down and fucking counterstrike. You make fun of yingling for fucking Qinu Yusuf.

Yeah, because that stacks dooming his elo. All he does, dude, yingling isn't the pissiest of moods. He logs on and he's so mad because his friends run it down in counterstrike. And he's not, Aiden's not there to carry. But do something from your friends. Ask you me about my age. this morning. You had an ace this morning in the a.m. This morning

because I fucking, you know I had a bunch of time. I had a bunch of time. Lord knows I had time this morning. Lord knows that's time I had carved out. Yon, dude. Y'all, we didn't do the podcast early. Probably better.

It is funny though because Yingling has, this is the stage that we went through is Yingling would see me play a counter strike and he was like, I'll play with you if you buy me a skin and I was like I'm not gonna buy you skin I don't I I would just say play counter strike if you want to play counter strike and then you would come over to me every day is like just buy me a knife he so yeah yingling wants him to buy it and just let

let him hold it no but he he he had to be negotiated down he's like what if you bought the skin and you still owned it but I just borrowed it and I and then I would be like nope hasn't changed my opinion about that so we go about two months two months of this process to which he just caves and starts playing Counterstrike. He's like, he kept gambling like, I'll learn some lineups if you give me the skin. I'll play more if you give me the skin. And now we just play. No skin involved

whatsoever. You held out. That's the art of the deal. He's your Discord kitten. But what happens is my Discord kitten when I get offline and I don't like this and I'm thinking about kind of bringing the hammer down on this is he disappears. This man hops back into the lobby and his

Elo's gone down 2,000 points. And it's because he's QA with the poop lot dude the poop lot he will say like he's he tells me stories about it and he's like yeah i just went nonverbal and then i just ran it down so the game would end he's in a game with four of his friends that's so crazy when we were about to i came into the office and he's playing counterstrike and he's he's he's down he's at his desk and he's he does this thing when he's sad is you know when yingling's gaming and he's super attentive he's very locked in like he's straight back at the computer very focused and

I walk in dark room he's fully lean back in the chair oh no he's just moving his arms a little bit I look at the score they're down 10 too dude and then

I'm all they're eating my fucking my food and I just hear Aiden started laughing in Yingling's face because he turned around and he looked at me he looked up

he looked up like this and he just he just rolled he just shook his head left back and forth I left the room for two more minutes I came back

he lost the game of 13 too Dude, gaming is so back That's why I don't want to go to France There's no reason to fucking go to France No, we can go to the awesome Vitality E-sports lounge and we can play there Do you mean it? Mm-hmm, in the first night

I did have, I did have fun Is it still there you think? Probably, that team's doing well Oh, go, go play We could also go to Evo France Oh, that's the following weekend, right? No, I think it's this weekend No, I'm stupid as fuck

I'm stupid as fuck Why don't, you guys, you guys should be excited. You should want to go. You're fucking bailing for no reason. If I could teleport there and teleport back, I'd be excited. But I just don't want to travel. I don't want to go on the plane rides. You're turning into me, bitch.

Oh my God, you're going to get so into Rome in two years. It's so pathetic how you're just like me. And you're fucking just like me too. You, you yell at people in chat just like I do. I like this. I actually enjoy it. It's so perfect. I enjoy this sound because.

One's every 50 times that you do it. You see someone was like can you make slime play again in the race and you're like I'm gonna make him do anything why would I make my friend do anything You know what he's what he wants. You see that clip I forgot what the guy said. He said something like He said it was a glaze. It was just glazed. Yeah, here's what he said because I have it saved Because I because when you show signs of me. Yeah, I feel inspired You don't want to go you want us to turn into you so bad I just want to be justified because you guys point lab

me like a fucking lull cow every fucking day in my life. You're like, you get so fucking mad at people and shit. Tip the lull cow. It's because you are the low cow. You're a fucking lull cow. Put a basketball in your hand and put L'em against you

and you're a fucking low cow. It's like a lulled deer. Some sort of nimble, thin creature. A lull gazelle? Yeah, a lull gazelle. You go, bro, the guy was like, do you think that people in the games that you get in just FF because your name is so funny And then Nick said

You are a dick writer How do you not see that? And I'm like, yeah But if I said that I'm a fucking lookout That should be my sub-notification I was gonna use it as mine Oh use it, it's better

I don't do my own voice, yeah How do you not see that? You're not see that And I'm like yeah Yes, yes Yes bitch because even some people be like damn you played six games

today or you played 12 games today and no LP gain and you're like why would I want to read that? Why would I want to read that? And I'm like yeah what do you want to fucking read it? Is that nice? Yeah someone subs and they're just like cut your hair and I'm like thanks

appreciate that. I was talking to Squeaks at Fast 52 because he's like so resilient to all this shit. Oh yeah and I was like what is it man? What makes you different? He's like I just think it's fun I was like, you love this. You love streaming.

You love going live. He's like, I fucking love it. Wow. And I'm like, that's goat. That's goat. That's fucking goat right there. He's such a bright star of a man. Dude, the other day I was, I think yesterday I was streaming, and I forgot I was

streaming while streaming. That's bad. It was only for like 10 seconds. But for a moment, I was just playing Lee Legends, and I was like, oh, I'm streaming. That's so. I just forgot. Could never, ever happen to me. I was just so, like.

like lost in the game I was just like I'm not even I was like oh my god I'm streaming right now people can see me right now were you losing or winning probably losing if I had to guess interesting I'm probably when I'm winning I'm way less focused yeah there's more time to feel yourself whatever chat make a joke ski bears

I don't know man but I I'm 35 yeah I know secret I said it earlier shut up Aiden so what I want to say is that Well, you guys One day you'll be 35 or you won't Well, what tips do you have for us?

Don't say tip. Don't say tip to the low cow. They don't know. Don't say tip. What advice do you have for two 30, almost 30 somethings? Yeah. Well, in a way.

What did you learn when you entered your 30s? I learned. I remember when you entered your 30s because I took a photo of you. The photo. I took a portrait of you for your 30s. The 30th birthday is when I decided. to go bald.

Oh my God, right. Yep. I was like, fuck this. And you gave up. Not holding on this shit. Gave up. Phenesteroid wasn't as ubiquitous as it is now. Now you can get that shit in a, you get that shit in candy now.

You get that shit in your McDouble, bro. Ozempic Finasteride McDouble double with chi. I'm chatting down on that. Western bacon cheese. My advice for you, you chuckleheads, I think that you start to really feel the fact that it's not going to be like you will die one day you will and it starts to really drive the things that you do and my advice is don't let it make you scare just let it let it use that as energy to like actually do stuff yeah i don't think i've ever been afraid of dying yeah it's i'm very afraid of

other people dying that's so pathetic what that's a pathetic pussy thing to be a You're a pussy. Okay. Okay. Alright. You're a fucking pussy. Okay, I didn't think that. You want to go.

You're a fucking low cow. Why would you be afraid of Aden dying? You're alone. I didn't say Aidan. This whole balloon city. The whole thing. The clown. We hire a clown probably for mime.

You don't come. Oh. No, it'll spread. You know what my advice also is? Take care of your back. Take care of your back. I'm not kidding. Like how.

Take care how. stretches uh don't slouch real shit it will catch up I guess I'm just a slouchy lolcow you are a slouchy lolcow

you can't make my fucking posture your posture is fucked up dude we make fun of the way you sit when you can't hear us all the time

because you have your big stupid headphones on and you're like you're pointed like a political cartoon like you know you know the features zipper you just

look at any political cartoon with a like a person in it librarian how sit librarian Cartoon. Oh my God.

Yeah. Yeah. You just like... It's the back hunch. Dude, is that a Supreme Jacket? What do you? Tyler the Creator? What is this shit?

Supreme Sweeter. It's just a sweater. It's a... It does happen to be Supreme. I'm wearing chain mail. But I bought it at... I'm wearing chain my own. I can beat the shit out of you.

I bought it at a thrift store. That's what... That's what puts a lot of stuff in perspective with me, with you. What? Is that you... You, no matter how much, like, fucking money you spend on stupid ass clothes. This costs $50.

Or how right. Really? For Prime? They felled off. No. The prime is not all expensive. They felled off. No.

So you buy fucking $50 sweater. You think you're all that. And you have a fucking Apple watch and all this fucking dumb shit in your life. But the thing is, dude, I could beat the shit out of you. I could beat the shit out of you. And you couldn't do anything about it. No. You couldn't do it.

I would fucking punch you. I would punch you. I'd punch you, and then I'd start, which would push you back. It wouldn't knock you out. It'd push you back enough. And then I'd start, I'd start peeing on you. And you wouldn't know what to do.

Like, you fucking peeing on me. I would piss on you, like Miles Taylor pissed on me in that dream. You'd piss on me? And you'd fucking get all mad that I'm peeing on you. And then I'd call you a fucking lull cow, and I'd say, do you drink my piss, low cow? And I would win to fight. I would win the fight.

And you think you could take him in a wrestling match? In a wrestling match? You got the long arms. Yeah, I think the long arms might help. What the fuck is the long arms? What the fuck is a long arm gonna do when I break it in two? It's wrestling. You don't get to break his arms.

I get to do whatever I want. It's wrestling. It's wrestling. What are you talking? What's the rules? Of wrestling, like in high school wrestling, like wrestling? Well, okay, he's trying to restrain me with his arm. I use my force to break his arm.

Then you'd be like, okay, Aiden wins by technicality because you broke his arm. The guy with a broken arm is not winning anything. Yes, if you... Fine, you could say whatever you want. If you say, oh, that guy won and he's holding his arm screaming, I'm like, okay, fine. I'm a loser, I guess. It's like, if you're boxing and you kick someone in the nuts and they heal over, you can't be like, I won the boxing match.

You broke the rules. That's different. You don't hit someone in the nuts. It's not. It's the rules. You don't hit someone in the nuts. You just don't do that. You just don't do that. It's the rule. You don't break someone's arm in the wrestling. But if like, if it's wrestling and he's trying to kill me with wrestling. Sorry, the rules, spiritual rules of humanity count here, but not the rules of the game we're playing. But I break your fucking arm instantly. Okay.

If I had to. But you can't, if I'm peeing on you from a distance, there's no way you get to my arm. This pee strategy, I feel like it would just make me more mad. Yeah, but I'm also mentally shaking you because I'm calling you a lull cow while you do it. I just start getting really hesitant. Yeah, I will say this. If you aimed the pee into my mouth, I think it's like a boss eye and I go down. Do you know when you play Super Mario Sunshine and you're fighting like Pini Piranha and you kind of get the, you aim the flood and you have to hit it into his mouth.

over and over again I'm picturing that's what it would be like If you piss in my mouth You win Because it's so embarrassing Yeah yeah yeah And then I'd stomp your

And then I ground pound your belly I think you piss at anyone's mouth You win no matter what you're doing Yeah There's a lot of power Universal constant of life In a debate You pee in their mouth

Oh my God Do you think that's what the US When they vote When they vote on the Gaza thing At the UN Security Council Do you think the US rep is actually He's peeing in everybody's mouth Fast enough

And that's why That's why it's unmistakable skill. One to 19 or whatever and we keep getting away with it. Maybe that's why, yeah. We're just,

we have the best pissers. Yeah. I'm sure some piss taste good. Mm. A hundred percent. It'll be bad. Well, I think I told this before, but one time me and my friend

made a concoction of like almond extract and things we thought would get us drunk. And then our pee smelled like sweet delicious butter. Like it smells really good. Do you have sweet pee if you have, like, you don't deal with your diabetes properly? Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you have, like, a disorder, like, bad blood diseases,

then you're going to have sweet pee. Oh, the sweetest pee. Because your kidneys aren't doing the work. Yeah. Or no, wait. Yeah. What? Okay, what if for the final episode of the yard

when you go and leave to Sweden, we all drink each other's pee? I'll do that. Cheers to us. I love how down. He's like where I'm going. This is just. This is just a regular.

This is like orange juice with your breakfast. Maple syrup urine disease. Okay, okay, I have a theory. This is, I'm not, I'm dead ass. I'm dead ass. Okay, my best friend growing up, sounds good. He's type one diabetes.

His dad has type one diabetes. I spent maybe half of my time between sixth and twelfth grade at his house or like maybe six and like 10th grade because they were like my second family. Every weekend we'd like stay up. We'd play like Yu-Gi-o, we'd play video games. That was like where our friend group landed.

Dude, his house smelled like maple syrup all the time. I'm dead ass. Okay. It smelled like a thick maple syrup for years. And I wonder if it has to do with that. Are you still in touch with this young man? Yeah, he was the guy who's wedding. I just went to.

No way. Yeah. And the smell, it smelled like that for maybe like five or six years. It implied that they're like not flush in the toilet, though, I feel like. Maybe it's, it's like a forever. Right, because if it only has to do with pee, then, like, you think it's the cabinet of, like, jelly donuts and stuff that they're eating. Like, it's a strong. That's a lot ofx house right now.

They didn't have, no, that's, that's only if you get the factored jelly donut planner. That's it. Lutter right now in his medicine cabinet is just jelly donuts and he just grabs one and eats it on the toilet. Yeah. Do type one and type two folk have beef with each other? Yeah, I think one of them. They're like, you got to go. If he got type two, it's a bit of stolen value.

It is 100%. Type 1 people are probably like, fuck you, bro. I was born with this shit. Eating your way to type 2 to fuck a girl at the type 1. Yep, type 1, I got that shit too. I've had the whole time. What are you doing later, by the way? You want to get awesome pizza?

Yeah, do you want to get some sort of very neutral food? Is the person is his wife diabetic? No. So they're race mixing. We're okay with that? Yeah, dude. Yeah, a bunch of the family actually didn't show up. It's so contentious.

Really contentious. Yeah, I mean, I'd have a problem with it too. When was the last time you guys had pigs in a blanket? Yeah, you were saying how this fell off. I think it fell off. Pigs in a blanket? You know what's crazy? Because they're so good.

Well, we said this. And then Ludwig said QD makes it all the time. Yeah, because it's like an Easter tradition or some shit. And I think that that's when I had it. She made it for us? Is when her silly ass made them. She made it. I think it was at her, I think it was at the Super Bowl party this year.

She had some. Pigs and it like it fell off. Oh, I had another thing that fell off. It was so good because it did. But then I forgot probably because it fell off. It was so good, but it fell off. It was like a good like damn that did fell down. How good can it be if it fell off?

Well, that's what I'm saying. It was like, damn, that used to be. Like, the way, we measure how much a falloff is impacts us by how much something was the shit. Little water toy that you put your penis in. I will say, I never put my penis in. But you know exactly what I'm talking about. But I know exactly what you're talking about.

Hold on. Hold on. I put my penis. We all put our penis in. I didn't put my penis in. You did it? You know, like I said, I didn't have one. It was always someone else. You had put penis?

Yeah. You were watching. Did all the kids in the schoolyard put their penis in it? They weren't putting in their penis at the school yard. Yeah, and under the monkey bars. Just dropping dick into the weird fleshlight that they just gave kids. Yeah, that thing fell off.

It did fell off, because I feel like it's like the kids are probably just getting their own flashlights now. Yeah, because they're cheap. I heard booboos fell off. I heard boobies fell off so hard. Everyone was just wearing like Armstrong bracelets. Yeah.

Livstrong. I bet you had that shit, huh? you had that shit you had some live strong no that I actually to this day I remember having the thought of seeing a bunch of kids with those thinking I want that

where did they get them I'd live strong in the curb and just never getting one we had some in the crew I don't know where they came from my mom probably bought them wow you wanted you to be cool yeah you remember those those balanced bracelets remember those

yeah there were bracelets that they claim to help you balance. No, I know this. It was a hoax, but they were being sold everywhere. Balancing shouldn't be a- Yeah, these. Whoa. They're literally just rubber with like a holographic sticker. That's such a great scam. You have like this watch on that I remember the whole, like a level. I remember the whole, because I got the pitch. I remember the whole, yeah, I'll do it's aiden. Okay, Aiden, so I'm the guy giving you the pitch for the power base. I want you to stand up. I want you to stand up. You talking to...

You're talking to me? Yeah, I'm talking to you. Sir, can you hear me? Hello? Take off your Apple headphones. Go ahead, stand up. Stand up. You're at the mall.

You're at the mall. I want you to stand up on one leg and a T pose. Okay? One leg, so one leg up, and then T pose out. Yep, perfect. All right. Now I'm going to push your arm, okay? Oh, can I'm going to push your arm?

Try to stay up. But keep your arms flat, like stiff. Can't balance. Guy in chain mail, he can't balance. I'll put the mess bed on. I'll do it again. Do it again. Stiff arms, stiff arms, okay?

What the fuck? You can balance. It's because they just push lower on your arm. He pushed, but he pushed different part of my arm. It's easier to be. balance and then people got so got by this trick that they sold billions of these that is so smart yeah it's crazy it's crazy because balancing isn't something that comes difficult to most people no i you're so wrong it's the opposite what are you talking about i think balancing is hard no no i'm

talking about every day like our job is just stand up and walk around i see i see people aren't like god damn my balance is i think it was like pitched as like uh as like uh like uh like you don't realize how how much of your balance is off every day. Bro, you fall so much you didn't even know, bro. David Beckham and Cristiano Ronaldo. It was the craziest hoax ever. Did you actually know that you experience 50 microfalls a day?

Yeah, shit like that. You don't even feel them. You don't even feel them. And if you fix these microfalls, I'm talking more blood in your penis. Dude, Shaquille O'Neal was on that shit. You'll feel more alert, more confident. You'll be able to get hard, sir.

We are so, we're lacking in a good physical hoax that you wear. We haven't had one of those in a minute. No, we got different hoaxes now, though. We got like, fucking, we have fucked up. I want those hoaxes back. Yeah, those were the best. Well, that is a physical hoax meant to sell a device that is ultimately harmless. That is meant to extract value from everyone harmlessly, right?

There's no, no one got in trouble, like, you're not going some sort of Alex Jones doomsday prepper, like, rabbit hole. of the balance base. Maybe you are, but it's like, drink raw milk and, like, die of a disease that we exterminated 100 years ago. I'm going to piss a lot of people. I'm going to piss a lot of people. I'm going to piss 15% of viewers off right now. Power bracelets, crystals.

Same thing. What do you talk? No one's crystal defending in our comments. The people who, well, 50% of girls. The, they buy it and they charge the crystals because it does stuff in their life. Oh, dude. Now they,

And dude, they got rid of the crystals and now they'd just be charging their phone. If you made it all... They're putting their phone in the sun, like, how come it's not going up in the battery? If you made it all the way to the end of this episode, and you are a crystal believer, and I want you to explain why you believe in crystals and with an anecdote, and I don't want anyone else in the fucking comments to make lowl cows out of these people. We're here to learn. We're not here to make fun of these people.

We're here to be like, what are crystals about? answer some questions, and then we'll decide next week while we do the podcast in France with Ludwig. If you are Crystal Gurley, you're probably also like a hex girly, so please do not cast a curse on me, and let me know what stone or crystal I could wear while I'm playing League Legends for Winner's Q. We need that real bad.

I don't even know if my account's allowed to enter Winner's Q at this point. Maybe put a curse on slime. What the fuck did I do? Well, maybe they could fix your old Lowell account. Fix my running. Because you're such a big lull. Fix my running for. Would you either fix you running forever

or not be a lull cow anymore? That and more in the preview episode. That and 10 hot dogs in under 20 seconds on the primo. We'll see you there. See you later.