The Yard - Ep. 224 - Finally Reaching Gold

Episode Date: November 5, 2025

This week, the boys talk about Slime's journey on the rift, Ludwig attending the world series final, and how the country should have a principals office... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oh, sorry, it's phone time. Don't get me sick. No, it's okay. You're going to get it. No, no, no. It's a high chance you're going to get it. Take it. Take it from it.

Take it from me. I'm going to have gum surgery. Take my illness from me. And I'll be ill. Take my illness from me. I'm already feeling it. It would be so ill. Cali we want to fight me.

I wouldn't let him find me. Test results are in. You have strep throat. Incredibly contagious. You're lying. You're lying. And the whole reason you came in was that you weren't. Did you lie?

It detected your amount of bitches. Did you? Not detected. Yeah. Are we recording? Yeah. Oh, we are? Yeah.

Yeah. Oh. I should make a vaccine for Getting too much money Okay And that's I'm gonna need 13 boosters Welcome to the Yard podcast Amen

What episode are we on sick boy What episode? Yeah do you even know Like 50 I'm so loopy Yeah it's so much to fake a sickness For what missing two meetings Yeah oh bloody knows where's the evidence I'll call for you

No blood down let's make out with tongue And let's see who's really about this Finally. For real. Finally. We've been waiting for your cell phone. I'll do it. I'll do it for the cause.

Ew. If you want to chum check me, kiss me with tongue deeply. So Yamamoto got you sick. Yeah, I made out with Yoshinobu Yamamoto. I was lying down. I was getting massaged by Shohei. Zipper, can you pull up the video? It's better he massaged you because he was not playing, bro.

Yeah, what happened? What happened to your go, bro? I'm waiting to say some shit like that to you. What was talking about? What was he was stupid? Was he on the field? All day. You didn't show up?

Are you talking about Show Hay? Yeah. Show Hey, he even show up or show out. Nothing happened. Showing's old news. Is it cool how he showed up? That's all about Rojas. How he pulled up and he was just like, oh, I just forgot how to play baseball.

Now it's all about Ross. Now it's all about Rojas is 36. Okay, watch this video. See if you could spot Ludwig. This is amazing. Because you can. Oh my God, that hammered there? It's the guy jumping up and down in the white shirt.

Oh, yeah. It's on the left. Yeah, it's the one guy. The video is so sad. It's the entire arena's heartbreak and then you can see Ludwig dancing up and down like a little sim. Yay! You should have stormed the field when that one guy threw the ball towards his face. You should have stormed the field like, hey, oh, what the fuck? Dude, that's when I got there.

You're talking about when Robleski had a close pitch? Yeah. So what? Can you tell us what happened? Because at first I thought you didn't make it at all and then you didn't make it back? You can make it back? Your gross, incompetent troglodyte people. Yeah.

Yeah. Tell them. My people? Yes, your people. My Canadian people. No, bisexuals. Oh, oh, yeah. No, Canadians.

With the government shutdown, they only have the bisexuals at the airport now. What the fuck? What the fuck I do? The Canadian airport, air traffic control, halted flights to Toronto. And there's not even a government shutdown in Canada. They don't have government. Yeah. No.

Yeah, we're kind of, it's an anarchy up there. It's just what the moose want. They just look at a big grandfather clock. Was there a moment? Was there a moose on the runway? No, there wasn't even a moose on the runway. And if there was, I would have fucking brr. Yep.

I would have taken care of that. Donkey gets hit by train in Pakistan. Quick, quick, quick, quick, moose. How big is moose? Land animals. How big is moose on land animals? Top ten list? Top ten list.

The question is, how big is a moose on the top of ten? Yeah, yeah, yeah, go, go, go, go, go, go. It's coming in a number, coming in at number three. Four point six to six. Can I ask a clarifying question? No. Okay. Third biggest, third biggest.

Four. because number one elephant land animals I'm gonna say three I don't know what do you think I'm a fucking nerd why do you like moose is so much I got no fucking clue

wait a lady those are so it's fucking fuck me it's not even top 10 you know what my clarifying question was top 10 you guys are fucking you know my clarifying question was in the top 10 it was do you even know if it's on the top 10 false dichotomy that would have saved us I would have jumped on the fucking

what your your job in that spot is to just guess 15. Yeah, but I hate that loving questions where it's just like it's not even on there, bitch. It's like the Diet Coat thing. Remember that? When he was like, I'm going to put Diet Coke and Coke on a fucking chopstick. You got to tell me which one's which. And they were both Diet Coke.

That was good. And I'm like brother. That was good. That's your responsibility. I'm operating within a universe as if one has to be that answer. Okay, well, what happened to you? The Canadians did wrong by you. I got a flight. The Canadians fucked me because they delayed my flight by an hour and a half. Why? Because I don't know.

Canada's incompetent? What do you want for me? We're in the middle of... We're in the middle of a shutdown. Huh? I wish they're in the middle of a shoot. Nope. Okay.

A film shoot. Maybe like... To show how incompetent they are. A film shoot to demonstrate it. And it just runs so... You know what I think we need in America? If I could speak my piece, I think we need a principal's office. You know how like school used to have like, you gotta go to the principal's office and it's like, ooh...

We should have a principal's office. Is this jail? No, I was going to say this is jail. I wanted to say this is jail. principal's office. I want to have a principal. I want America to have a principal and a dean. And I want them to be separate. I want you to

have to report to him and it's the only time you talk to him all years if you fuck up. And then also your parents have to show up. The dean would be one of, he would be like the cool guy, but he's, he's low-key kind of a dick. Oh yeah, yeah, and he's about his bread. This is a money play. He's a sheriff. He'd be evil. And he fucking on the soccer coach.

Well, the prince would... America's soccer coach. In America would have a soccer coach. And the dean would be fucking on. honor don't have. Oh, I don't like any of this, but I would say you go to the principal's office for, let's say, killing a guy. Yeah, you kill a guy. First, you go to the principal's office. It's your first strike. You kill, you kill a guy, cold blood. That's a demerit. Go to the principal's office, Mr. Bruno. And then, and then we, America, go ooh. Yeah, we have a public forum for ooze and O's and you get, it's a demerit system. So the first, the first punishment you do is

always principal's office. So I kill a guy, hold on, I'm killing a guy. I'm going to the principal's office. It's kind of a frequent. I go to the principal's office and you get expelled. That's just going to happen. Are you talking about deporting people? No. What are you talking?

You expel them from the country. No, you expel them from being lit all summer and you put them in a box. They don't need to be, no, this is good. Instead of, no, we bring back Saturday school,

but on a country side. On a national rule. We have Saturday school for the country. No more jail. I kind of like that. Oh my God. If you had Saturday school, but you're like 34.

Yeah. be so funny. And it's boring, bro. You're just in the desk that you crack your back on and you get over there. There's like some of the worst criminals in the world and you just smoke weed to get here. Dude, oh, I think, I think you're, now you're on to something. So let's say I go into, let's say I just kill like four guys at the mall. All children, four years old. No, I just during the kid purge so you don't even have to go to the principal. No, no, I go. It's four years old and four of them. Yeah. Maybe he, this is a code. I go into pecks. We have to decode what he was trying to say.

I go into Paxson with a chainsaw. Right. I kill four guys. Okay. You killed four alt-em-a-man singers? Yes. And the whole community is devastated. System of a down is over.

They arrest me. They sent me to the principal's offers. Ooh. I get assigned Saturday school. It's like Big Brother. You just hear it. This idea... No, I get Saturday school.

It has no legs. What do you... It doesn't he have arms? No legs. What is Shoe Otani? Because he changed on the North. Let's go. So, okay.

Why do you think it's a bad idea? because I have five reasons why it's a good one. Because you killed four people and you're getting Saturdays. Saturday school. He loses Saturday. Well, you don't just get one Saturday.

I lose my Saturday. You don't get one Saturday school for a four members. How many Saturdays do you get? It's going to be a lot. It's going to last like 10 years. No way. You guys are Saturday school.

Because like if you throw gum at someone in public, that's one Saturday school. You don't go to jail. Do you get Saturday school for throwing gum at somebody? If you throw gum at a growing class, yeah, you're going to the pencil's office.

First you're going to the pencil's office. And if honestly, if you have a pretty good track record at school, he's going to be like, kiddo, what are we doing? Not a Saturday school in this scenario is kind of a, it's kind of a rough mishmash. What happens at Saturday school? There's the one guy who threw gum into somebody's hair sitting next to the guy who chainsawed four people. And then like, it's a vibe. It's like, if you molest a child, do you go to Saturday school? Yeah, and they have a, they have like their desk.

Like if you don't sit in their desk, because they've been here a while, it's territorial. That's Sunday school. So wait, are they allowed? Are they allowed to like? The other six days of the week, they walk free. That's pretty good. And then Saturday, they go back. That's so perfect for them because they're free on school days.

You've made a great system now. Why is every criminal a child molester to you? I'm just saying you have to consider them when you talk about criminals. He means like by the vibes. Like, they're in the vibe sense. They're child molester. No, no, I mean someone who molest children. What if a guy is a, a pedophile?

Or a girl. Girls can be pedophiles too. But they have awesome vibes. She's right. That girls can be pedophile. See, I feel like you didn't acknowledge it. Of course I would,

of course I acknowledge it. Women are. Fucking, punch through that glass ceiling, ladies. The women's vanity fair pedophile the year. The Chomaz. I do think,

that dress is transparent. Dude, Aiden was talking about how he will just fucking drive over here on his little e-bike doing L.S. Which is also our show is harder. It's harder to be. funny than to inform people. And I've been saying

this all day. Especially because they don't inform. Yeah, they don't even inform. They don't even inform. They just have on awesome CEOs and ask them what's your net worth. We interviewed the president of Shopify today. We were asking about like, you know, how do you view your company's success in contrast

with the current labor market? And then it's like, I come over here and then I fucking, I dressed up as a furry last week. I actually did that on bullshit. Don't show to LS next week. Don't show up. No show up. You guys are cool. Don't show up.

Don't show up. I like you love me. Don't show up. I killed, okay. All right. A chain saw him against Saturdays. Don't horse a shirt

has a cell phone and it's like spleen and he's like it hurts. Everything hurts. I'm gonna 100 Saturdays for this. Why? I got an idea. I got an idea.

Okay. Finally. A fucking idea. Contribute for once. Because this idea doesn't solve a problem. Okay. Let's hear your idea then. My idea is going to solve a problem.

Okay. There's a problem we have right now. Right. Which is that, you know, every country. thinks their president's bad you know for the most part

yeah okay okay I'll give it to you all presidents are bad all presidents are fat some people have good ones yeah they get excited going in and then going out they're not as excited all of our presidents

have small naturals perky ones perky small naturals like Elon on Twitter he's got perky ones he's got a perky mouthful he's got a mouthful yeah you got more than a mouthful

you got an unhinger jaw for that did he has an A cup that's a 32B that's a baby I'm saying listen up I'm saying swap president day like we get

we get like you spin the wheel and we get like Kazakhstan's president and they get Trump for the week I kind of like that reality show this is like next idea of the podcast draft it's just for a week just for a week just to just have a taste of what it's like do they have infinite power

they have the power of the president they have the power of all in your country hold on no no big distinction do they carry the power of the presidency they have in their country to our country no I think it should be that way It should be land. Like, imagine, imagine we just got fucking North Korea. No.

It should be wild for like a month. But then it'd be boring the other way around. Bro, whole zipper. Look up president of Lithuania. This guy looks crazy. This guy looks... Let me see him. This guy looks so crazy.

Crazy like he looks bad? Look at the second picture. He looks like the angry one from inside out. He looks like a me I have on my way. It frog-esque. It looks like the Mucinx guy was hit by the human ray for the crossover episode. So what if we get that guy? Okay. Their flag is dope man. I think I show speed met this guy by the way. He probably did. Wait, that's not the president. That's not the flag. What's the presidential standard? Do we have one?

That's the flag. That's cool. That is cool. I can ride with that. They got a griffin on it. So we want this guy? They think griffons and you turn for this guy? It's not if we want him. We just might get him. We might get him. We might trade. a week and it's swap president's week. I don't want him, man. Lithuahia. That's the fun. If you don't want him.

If you don't want him, then maybe, like, if he does bad, it would make you appreciate your president or if he does good, you would then start hating your president more. That's the idea. Surely, we got a D-tier guy right now, though. Is he going to uphold Saturday school? But you might be able to find an F tier. Is he going to uphold Saturday school? Is he the Lithuanian president?

I don't think they have school there. Damn, shots fire. Lithuania, I don't think they got it. I don't think they got it. Wait, they had a female president That's I think a lot of countries have I think we're the slow one on that

Yeah, I think if your first female president Is white with short hair I think it should be canceled out Yeah, that doesn't count And it should just be It should be considered on the paper As a Republican dude No, because that's that's

You're disrespecting Lithuanian hair abuse You said that they don't know how to read I didn't say that I said they don't go to school That's crazy When you still Lithuanians don't have school But they know how to cut hair Lithuanians know how to cut hair

And they're all homeschooled And they're a little antisocial Ooh, we should have a PTA as well An ASB President and Teacher Association We should have an associate A student body in America And they plant in there

And we have prom Yeah, I was gonna say And you know what else? Every year we have mandatory prom A prom. Mandatory adult prom that you have to go to And you can't ask your actual significant other to the prom

And bullying is allowed if you don't get caught in the school of America. Oh, dude, you should get pizza in the lunch in a lot in America. Dude, and it's shitty pizza? We had little scissors at my school. Isn't that fucked up? And you always thought, dude, you always say some shit, like, actually, it was really hard for me growing up.

Tell yourself. I've never said that in my life. That's fucked up for all. So different reasons than you think it's fucking. I've never said it was really hard for me growing up. I never actually had such a pain. Yeah, me at my school, we all, we all skate. there. We ate the Little Caesar's pizza.

We all broke out our hot hog HDPVRs after school. I was the only one to be clear. No, two of us. Look, I think if the world at large was more like school, I think that would be in that. I think that would be good. That's like a bad idea. I think most people hated school. You think most people hate school? Yeah. Most people weren't fucking on that lunch lady.

Most people weren't fucking on that lunch lady. It would be crazy if everyone was. Yeah, if you're getting, if you're getting some, if you're getting some preem lady. Would everybody, that, The lunch lady's running a train on the kids. We got Little Caesars in the lunchtime. We had Top Shelf Lunch Lady. That wasn't no middle of the mall lunch lady.

No, that's not a lunch lady. That's just a Little Caesar's employee. That's a food cart employee. That's why you always go back to school. You're fucking on the hot dog on a stick employee. He's trying to make everything's cool because then he gets, you know, Little Caesar's Day. Free beats, yeah. He gets his.

I think I told you guys this before, but the year after I graduated school and you're going to say it was some crazy year. I literally was about to say, so it was 82. Right. So, anyway, the year I graduated school, my, well, and the Allies won, too. My fucking, my school district changed the, they changed the weekday to four days a week. So everyone after that got three-day weekends for the rest of the school. Wait, that's dope. They still have that?

I don't know. They had a weekend? Liberal school. But basically they were to a Montessori school, didn't realize they had the Grigori calendar. There was enough money and they had three-day weekends and it was crazy and I felt so hoed because I graduated and then they just had three-day weeks. Did you're going to send your kid to a Montessori school? Mine? Of course he is.

I'm going to send my kid to a public Swedish school. Which is a Montessori school by America standards. Wednesdays, it's sleep outside of the snow day. Uh-huh. We leave all our babies in the day in the snow. And then our babies are just walking around in the snow and then we have to sleep. trust around the society because of you know why. You lose them to the cold outside, but it's okay.

We have paid the file rehabilitation. You have another use to pay the tax credit for your dead child. Wait, 75% of students self-reported feelings related to school were negative. Yeah, that's what I was like, you're trying to make everything school. Everyone hated school. In the U.S. We're going to trust what Yale has to say about school? It doesn't want to ask you.

Is he talking about the U.S. school system? I don't think, I think when Nick is saying, let's bring back school stuff, I think he's referring to the U.S. school system. I don't think he's saying let's implement the Latvian school system because they had school there as well to bring back school he says school fell off he's trying to bring my school in class that shit fell off crazy

we need school at a government level when we were kids or when you guys were kids your parents don't take the fun away for us let us do it don't be rabid us I hate you when you guys were kids your parents thought school fell off and now you're saying school fell off school bin

felled off. No, school was lit when I was in it. The truth. That's because you had Little Caesar's pizza. But school had been fell off. That's what I'm saying. It's like you think school was lit because you went to a lit school. You went to lit school and everyone liked you and shit. My school had culinary. That's crazy. That's fucking crazy. I think what's school? My school had

one, my senior year, I had ceramics and art and they were different classes. What the fuck? You get stabbed in the eye if you didn't drive a BMW. Yeah, that's how you, that's how you lived. No, that was the top. That was the crem d'illa cream. school. I brought this up before where there was a kid at my school who's a license plate with two swag for you. I thought that was so cool. Dude, vanity plates as a high schooler and GMI. Uh, but okay,

let's bring back school. What is it? What's that? Not gonna make it. Oh. Not gonna make it. What can you do? Can you do? What can you do? What can you do? Just stab someone in the head, what can you do? What do you do? What do you do? Just blow. You have two generation Got into jail. In your life, you have two generational wins, and here you are fucking being mean to me. I have two generational, what are they? The Dodgers?

Uh-huh. And slime getting gold. Yeah, it's one of my two? It must be. It usurfs me getting platt. Well, you had that already went by. I'm talking about this week. Oh, this week, okay.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, I see, I'm misunderstood as well. Yeah, you've enjoyed two. Well, let's hold up. Round of applause for slime. After 3,400 games. There's a lot He has hit

Did you count the game Do you know what it actually is? I don't know It's on there It's a lot Zipper pull it up I guess is like It's 700

680 Oh no no no no no All time Like total Is it like 500? I think I've played six something I guess it's not crazy

I thought Is that why I said Well it's not counting the ones I played I mean it is counting them But I was thinking about like When we started the challenge And then after the

I ended the challenge And then those ones but you hit gold bro and you won your gold game offline I didn't win my gold game because you wouldn't shut up about it well you knew if you shoot up today dude we tortured them of course yeah I said I said I was like it

literally doesn't count if I don't win my gold I mean it's not even just a game for some of us it was a Dorito yep it was yeah I guess the Dorito system makes you do it which is important but but you you want it not anymore yeah they digger you want it how do you feel how do you feel good Ludwig

thank you for asking that fucking question. That means a lot to me to fucking ask it. Dude, we were hate watching. When you were on the first rank up game, we were like, we all want him to win, but we also don't want the streams to end. So we kind of needed to lose.

Everyone was like, we don't want this to be the last day he's live. Something that was crazy, it was a crazy feeling, is I left at the office that day, yesterday. And I left, and I look back and I'm like, I buy, and everyone in the office is like, get, goodbye, make sure you stream as soon as you can.

Yeah. They were all like, we want to watch it. And I felt like, I felt so wanted. It's so funny, though, because you hear that,

and then a lot of people start tuning in when you're about to take gold, and then you're like, why are there so many people here? Yeah, that was dumb. I'm gonna end stream off for 10 minutes. I dumped the viewers.

Dude, I know, you have this weird idea that like, the people who come in are like others. They're all Ludwig's. No,

no, because you have to, sorry, what's the Ludwig? Let's go. Let's see that first. I'll go after you this. There's a lot to unpack here. They're all Ludwig's.

They basically tune in to the, you know, the grand finals. And they say, I've always cared about slime getting into gold. Except you did not in this case because you were always there. But in the Dodgers. I watch every regular season game. I can tell you show his birthday. It's like, to me it's like, well, okay. Dog 5th.

It's like, you know, if someone has like a lot of viewers, let's say like Northern Line, you might be like, Dan, Northern Lions got like 10K viewers. That's crazy. Yeah, what's going on? But then when you have this narrative story arc you've been working at for months and people are like, the story might close today.

I want to be there. And I want to be like, I was there, I was there. And they all show up. You're like, who are all these people? And I'm like, they're the people you sired with your story. But why weren't they there earlier? But they might have been. We don't know that.

It literally is like GM of the Dodgers looking at the World Series attendees and seeing it's higher than regular season and being like, what is this? I think it's your Monday and Tuesday guys and your Wednesday and Thursday guys all showed up up. Okay, what I did then? By the way, 632 games.

Let's go. 632. What I did, though, is I dumped the viewers. So I basically heat checked anyone. You killed the stream. And what's weird is when you came back, you had more viewers for a little. For a little bit.

For a little, you had over 3,000 viewers. I think it was a bug. Yeah, I think it was a bug. But I dumped the viewer. I went offline for like two minutes straight. And so everyone who were like, because at that point, if you're listening to the stream, you're like, I'll just stay

because he's going to turn back on. Just be clear, there's a same amount of viewers when you won your game. No, no, no, no, no, wait, well, when I won when I won? When I returned from the stream from dumping the viewers, I had... It cut to like 1,400. Yeah, it was like cut in half. Yeah, but then it went right back up when you went back into the game. Well, then they're all real ones. Oh, now real ones. Because I got to say it. It's more of like, it's more of like, at least I heat checked them.

Sure. Which was, I thought was funny. It's funny. Because no one does that. That's funny to do. It is funny. It's just funny. People do this. Really? Yeah. Who does that? Duke Dennis. Who's that?

You're biting Duke Dennis' shit? You don't know who Duke Dennis is? Wow. That's crazy. I have a mental image of Duke Dennis and stream, 20 viewers. I have a mental image of Duke Dennis in my head and it looks like Hitch. He does a, nope. He has a smile that lights up a room. He's also a black man.

It looks a little bit like Hitch. Because Hitch has cornrows. That's Duke Dennis. Okay. And then go back. And it says Duke Dennis and it's stream. because it was overwhelmed by the number of viewers that's pretty funny

he ended he said there's too many people here oh he full ended so a part of the reason I also wanted to dump viewers is because I was at the top of the category and I didn't want to get sniped brother it's League of Legends and it's not worlds like the biggest stream has 800 viewers I just thought it would help me not get sniped

if I did this I see and that would suck to get sniped at the very end that's like a sniper's dream I remember you saying like am I at the top of the category and I was like it's a league of legends what do we Well, I think you have a sort of view of Double Lyft will have like two, three K views. Yeah, sometimes I'm not.

Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. He's like probably, there's not that many. In the other day, there was like a German challenger player with 18,000 viewers. There's climbing. Europeans. That's the kind of way. Any time zone? I guess.

Any time zone is weak. Either way, I thought. The European League time zone almost is the NA time zone. Either way, I thought it'd be funny to do it to dump viewers. Then maybe not get sniped. Maybe it would disoied some snipers. And two, that is just funny in general to do. And three, as a way to reward the people who are there, like, every day to be like, I am watching, I am noticing you, because you have been putting up with me being fucking insane for all these, you know, days.

So you did it for Fardomor, is what you're saying. Kind of, yeah. Like, kind of, yeah. Why was I on the EFstein list with Fartimore? You were on the, so at the very end, I had a list of all the people that is a big, fuck you. Before you were gold. No, it was after. No, it was after.

He had won his gold game by this point. Oh, oh, oh, oh. my god okay okay okay such a fucking demon of a man can you pull it up zipper it's it's the very end yeah so fuck all the people so in order

it's Fardomore Moonbin who is this guy that I kept queuing with oh I fucking hated I remember this guy moonbid ran a mu mu with ghost is LT Grey Paul who I kept checking his profile and he's the most insanely bad player of all time he was in my games Tim Ludwig Mel so let's pause just the champ Mel

why love yeah I feel that I know what It's obvious. Why Tim? Tim is, because, you know what? This is how I know you don't hang out or at least have the volume on a lot. Tim chirps so fucking much. Tim Trips a lot.

I don't chirp. What's wrong with Tim Turp? You said... You did the Instagram story. No, the Instagram story was fine. Here's the reason why is because Ludwig keeps saying that he keeps intimating that

this is something easy, that I could do it? You keep asking, yeah, yeah, could I do that? I'd probably do it pretty fast. You made me feel as if I'm being competed with and you're not even doing it. I think this is your next league challenge. I would love to see you go mid lane and he's T1

and you have to do it in less games than slime did. He would. So I thought about this a lot and I think that the reason when Ludwig did the Platinum challenge his job was to get Platinum in the least amount of games possible. One more game of league that he

had to play was going to be like miserable. So that's why he's like coaching very focused, very training, practice. Like, you put a lot of effort into gaining a rank fast, which I didn't really do. I just cram, like, mash the fucking solo cue, like kind of like, we all do. You would queue, and then you'd mess up your Diana combo,

and you'd be like, fuck, I'm going to work on that, and then just cue again. Yes. And there's something, I think, very sincere about that, because that's how we, most people engage with games, and I don't recommend it, but I thought it'd be funny. Oh, so your data.

I think I'm data. Your data for, like, what, What is the average gamer who's just mashing Q? What does it take for them to get gold through Midland? Maybe watching some videos every now and then, but ultimately not really doing much. And I thought that would be interesting. You don't even watch videos?

I would watch me. I was like, Korean Diana versus LeBlanc. And then I'd be like, okay, and learn kind of nothing. Yeah. And then, and so that's what I did. But compared to like Street Fighter, which is like I got coaching and I paid for coaching actually at one point, I wanted to get good fast. So anyway, if you did this, you'd get good fast because you can't be wasting time.

I could waste a lot of time, which I did this money. Yeah, I would actually just go Garon Mid. That doesn't work. Go Garen Mid. That would suck ass. That would work. Maybe it would work. You know what?

You get Perry, J.G. telling you how to do it. I got Perry, J.G. who says, hey, run this, and then I watch a Garon video every night before falling asleep, and then I get there. No. Garen Mid. I don't think I've ever fought a Garen Mid. But so.

I would change your life. Wow. Yeah, this is my hit list And Ludwig was on there Because he was rooting for me But I also knew that he was patting his big belly Going Hold up, no, no, no, no, no.

Simply gold? I've never, I never said simply gold But It's true that when you guys started the challenge This is like two months ago When you guys were fucking Just in the boons of silver

You guys are like Jungler, chocolate days Lane is such a sophisticated wall It is. Filled with so much interaction. I think it is. Truly takes a genius mind

to understand how to play. It is. You wouldn't survive. You use the tutorial champ. That's the language you guys would use, which I thought was... You use a tutorial channel. I thought it was pathetic.

All right, that's fine. Then I'm a pathetic little man. No, no, but now you're gold. Now you're gold. Shut up. And you get to stand on that. But when you were silver saying it, I was like...

That's so shut up, because you don't mean that. So you got to say it for me then until I get there. Yeah, what's next? Are you done streaming now? That's what I wanted to know. That's what the people want to know. Is the journey over forever? My poor girlfriend's going to fucking blow her head off.

I just wasn't hanging out with her. Or like once a week. Yeah. Which is like, you know, she wants more. Yeah. And that was like the biggest problem. I was like. So, but like you're not even going live once a week to play league?

Why would I? No. No. The answer is no. Okay. And that's it. You guys gotta find something else to watch. I don't know, there's nothing else to watch.

But you're not gonna stream? The TV had one channel. Are you doing a streamer? The TV had one channel is my favorite channel. And now the TV doesn't work. Different lolcow. My girl's evil. The girl's evil.

She keeps waking me up at night. Is it for nice things like compliments? She keeps waking me up going, you're snoring. I can't sleep, stop snoring. You're snoring? You're snoring so loudly. You're such a fat oaf of a man. Because you're oafish and big?

Do you make tuba noises when you snore? Or is that just when you walk around? I go bo-da boom boom boom boom. then you snore and there's nothing you can do and I was selling her there's none that I can do there's no way to reduce my snoring

because we have this lumpy mattress that we're stuck with because I have 40 down payments on it so we're just going to live this light oh my God I was snoring last year I didn't even realize I switched to a helix sleep mattress guess what I'm snoring anymore

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Tyler starts streaming again. That's different. Tyler's playing Minecraft. He's a lull cow of Minecraft. He is a lull cow, yeah. Lovely might start fucking streaming one day. Who knows? I want to watch a lovely play league for some reason.

Can you find a reason? Please go. Please. Find a reason, bro. I love watching you play. If I have anything that I could ask you. If I have like one request, it would be don't straight-lake-

Can I tell you how rich this is? What? Fucking rich is. When I come to the office, all you do is play CS2. You haven't worked in... Oh, you fucking do. All you do is dump Elo.

Last merchop was in literally April. Think about that. Last merch drop? Yeah, it was in April. Wait, it wasn't. Whatever. You just don't. Hell of yeah.

Hell of yeah. You're not doing shit. You're playing CS2 every day fucking cracking reds. You know. Stans is playing it? Stan's playing what? What do you say again? You and who?

You're playing CS2 cracking reds? Yeah, but who's a person you said? He said him and who? No one. Okay, I've misheard you by a lot. I'm realizing. What do you want for me? What do you want from me?

Let me be me. Let me be me. And I love you right now who doesn't play league. If Kitten wants to play league, he's gonna. Kitten's gonna play league. Kitten is so accomplished at League of Legends, he doesn't need to play anymore. Well, Kittin's getting told that it doesn't count if it's in the jungle. Oh, and that sandpaper tongue's rubbing on that Moussahar in mid lane.

I heard recently, and this is actually true, that jungle is the hardest role. I'm not, and I'm not making that up. To climb? I think the easiest roll to climb is probably mid No it's probably support Shut up man Support is Elo Potion

Huh? Support is Elo Potion If you're a decent player 100% Uh Make a decision man Incredulous Put your fucking

Put your fucking money Where your fucking mouth is Rutherford Yeah yeah I want to watch you play mid So bad I want to dude Oh my God

Oh my goodness And not even to hey watch I want to just see you Experience what we felt You would be hey watching Because if you went crazy I'd be like That's my guy

I'd be love watching I would. I'd be running Gallio mid. Sure. Okay. That's a tough one in Garland's great. That's better than Garin mid. And my Garin. And I'd be running a Moomoo mid. Yeah, fuck it. Yes. Do it. Yes. I want to see you... 20 CS in 20 minutes.

I want to see you go up against a champ. You had no idea what they do and be like, okay, let's give it a shot. Then you go, oh, and seven. You're like, what the fuck? Am I supposed to do? Like, that's awesome. And I go, what could you do? Do you do? I have the opposite problem. Do you do? What?

As the like in my lane Don't know what they do go 0 I had the I'm in lane I'm 7 and 0 And my jungler's fucking jacking off in the bush And I'm like god He's sperm in the bush And the game's over

Because my jungler's useless And my bot's useless My top's useless And here I am man Anyway if you do it I will be right there watching Okay Not hey watching

I just want to I want to connect with you Through the pain that I felt But I don't suffer like that Maybe not You don't suffer like that? I think you crash out quite a bit during league. When I played league, I didn't crash out one time.

Oh my God. Dude, it was like... It was crazy. It was like watching you play like a foddying game. Yeah. Like, it was horrible. You were a horrible... You were in a deep, dark pit.

There was a guy who was in your... I still remember this. He was in your game and he was knew he was on stream and he was on your team. And he was just said, sorry Ludwig about that, like, bad team fight or something. You were like, I don't want a fucking apology from you. I don't want to fucking be your friend. I never want to play with you ever again.

We're crashing out on this guy And I get shit You know what? I love that part of you People had texted me and told me he was a pedophile And you got the call? And I got the call And so that's why I reacted so harshly on him

Because you had the third party confirmation And you didn't throw? No You get a pedophile LP I still need to keep my LP I'm not even kidding My last day of gold Is I had a guy named CP Lover 67

Well maybe he means Caleb Pitts Maybe he's a big comedy family We all theorize what it could Maybe it's Chris Paul We all theorize. But he's played Breyer, so we pretty much know. That's tough. That's tough.

The Breyer fan. So what's your game plan now? This is played like a good. You're just doing your regular. Yeah. Regular schedule program. Offline. I see you offline all the time.

Yeah, yeah. Well, what happens when you hit it? Have we all purged league from our souls? Are you the last one? And once you're done, it's like we're all done. And we went on this grand journey together? I don't have a plan, but I think that if I get close, I might stream like the last couple games or something

and then when I hit it I'll probably take a massive break jump back on some work stuff and then maybe play casually with friends This took such a big piece of my life away Every day I was like It also made you a big streamer Like a goal that a lot of other people would kill for You know what I mean?

Like if you just kept streaming Not that you should or that you even want to But if you just kept streaming That could be a job I was trying to explain the appeal Of watching you play a solo cue game on stream to Zipper 3

and just the magic of what it is to watch you play and the way you get emotionally invested in Slime's Journey and that is hard to do with any other streamer Do you mean that? Do you fucking mean that? Of course. Of course I agree. I agree 100% and I had the same feeling of being sad that it's over and I was wondering I was like

what's the next? Because I figured there's a high chance you're done right so what's the next game we could get him hooked up? you want your fucking locale I don't think of it. I don't think of my I don't think the lockout hits the same if it's like Street Fighter or whatever like League is a special thing. This happened during Valorant a couple years ago when I was trying

to get to gold or like I was trying to get to a rank to play with you guys and so I just decided to start streaming and that's when I was streaming a lot of Valerate and But it hit with Valer it right? Were you guys trying to get the diamond? It was not the thing? No it was like He was trying to get the diamond. I was never trying really. Oh yeah.

It was a goal he had written down for himself at the beginning of the year. Passively putting some games. Didn't super care for it. But Valeran hit, league hit. So is there anything else that you could... Yeah, any fucking cock and ball torture device. Remember his chess arc? Slimes chess arc?

Yeah. I streamed it like twice. I mean, but like in life. Oh, sure. That, I mean, I like... You know what was fun? We were at that photo shoot for chess boxing and me and shake were playing. You beat him, right?

No. He trashed me I think you know I think it could be Rocket League No I don't guys I don't want to do this I am I don't know Oh no let us talk about what you want

It's not about you It's not about you You're gonna get hooked on something What is the EO But in a way it starts with One of us getting hooked on something Yes Yeah

And he gets a looped into it If Tyler what Tim actually pointed this out If Tyler won never He actually The moment you were in that fiddle stick Bush when you were playing that giant game with like Mr. Beast and shit?

It's like, no, he's just ripping. Okay, yeah sure. All right, start to interrupt. Sometimes you have to rip. Well, don't let him stop. This is so weird. Let me just started ripping his pajamas off. Like, I can't have to say

ripping them off, I'm just making them shorts. No, you're making one side shorts. Well, because it got a hole in it from our terrified camping thing. Come on, get there. No, it's ripping the wrong way now. be strong okay that was so satisfying

let me smell it sorry when you're in that bush and you you did the wrong thing and Tyler one was so mad at you and he crashed out and you Tim was like this moment is why you are playing league right now yeah that's right which is so funny that shit changed your life it looks like a bucket hat bro it does that's crazy

that should change your life for hell yeah you're prison Mike yeah that should change your life and what if he said a different game you know And then I... What if there's TFT in that moment? I'd ask for it to be Counterstrike, but it has such a dog shit-rank system

that I think the journey is less compelling. Yeah, because it's like, I want to hit 13,000. Yeah. What is that fucking... Why the fuck do they do it that way? That is so dumb. It's so bad.

Oh, my God, I dropped to 11,000. What does that mean? Yeah, like, you can be like, dude, like, Aden's 11,000 right now. And everyone's gonna be like, that sounds impressive. That's a huge number. a CS player, it's all the same

because it doesn't work. It doesn't work. You were saying. Cs is the famously broken system. Everybody between it's like 13 or 14K and 24K, it's all the same guy who's coin flipped in a different direction. Truly. I mean, that's what I say about Lee. You know how Elon was like, I'm

buying Twitter and I'm fixing the bot problem and then everyone made fun of him because the bot problem got worse, almost in protest of him trying? Like it brought out the people capable. This is, I think, Drew Levin's effect on league. Drew Levin starts making big tweets about league and how he's fixing everything and how he's, they're combating smurfs

and my games have only gotten worse. They shouldn't have put it, I think he messed up by becoming the face of like solving the system. Because now whenever something crazy happens to me and I get like, you crazy enter, you're like Drew Levin's just past his fucking belly and does nothing.

Yep, makes his $300,000 a year's salary. And then the proud, the guy named Proud White Man 88. It's the key playing the fucking game. That is a real guy. That still plays league. That he was in my game. And he trashed me. He trashed me in my game.

You can't lose to proud white baby. But I did. And it's probably not when he was born. And it's Drew Levin's fault. And it's Drew Levin's fault. And it's definitely not when he was born. That guy's younger than you. That guy's younger than me.

That's cool. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I, uh, it's nice being out of league. I was going to say. It's nice. What is even your relationship with Solo Q games?

Because it's like, I don't think he, when I remember at New Year's, you were playing a league game when you were trying to get to Platt and you were, you lost this barren fight and you were frustrated yelling at the computer. It's just me and you in the studio. And you said, this is the biggest waste of time I've ever had in my whole fucking life. And I was like, he's not happy right now. Do you miss grinding or playing anything? the grind was fun yeah but you know the grind also had purpose behind it you know now I would just have to make up a grind like even like gold I couldn't go for golden mid because although mid is a different experience and could be harder it's it'd be a step down from plat so I think his he's the narrative of him makes it make sense he's talking about for now for Ludwig you know but I'm saying the narrative of you saying he couldn't do it is what makes it yeah but I still think out and also it's it's If it is hard, it makes it way more entertaining.

You need a compelling enough narrative to continue to do it? I think so, yeah. Yeah, and I think that is a compelling narrative. He's the Tyler 1 of Mid. I was going to say, this whole thing happened because of the external force of Tyler 1. I am not, I disagree. I am not Tyler 1. I'm not big enough to make, put down the gauntlet for Ludwig to start playing with me.

I think you're big enough in his life. But Tyler 1 was also like, you know, he's. He's been rosting me for X amount of fucking news. He compliments me. He told me millions of people. I'm just trying to get him to do it again. Slime would just be like, Jesus.

Fighting for my fucking life trying to get him to do this. I can already imagine what slime would save my goal. I'd be like, yeah, that makes sense. I would have to concede. Because what am I going to do? Be mad that my friend achieved his goal? I would never do that. That's why it's not a good challenge

is because it is just incredibly achievable. I wish he would just do it, though. Like, what is the challenge here? It's like, can you hit, goal, even for me, it'd be like, could you hit gold in less games? You could. What?

You couldn't. Total playtime? Yeah, 100% no. I'm not going to get baited. I'm not trying to bait you. I know you could not. I'm genuinely not trying to bait you either, but I think you fucking stuck. I'm getting paid.

There are three people who play the game and one who does it. I played the game. I've gotten way better. I've gotten way better at two games than you two have ever been at. any game. Yeah. Gold's pretty on the level. I'm really good at swimming.

I could easily run a marathon. Two feels good for me. Two different days. I'm so good at basketball. I could win the curling Olympics. Like, what are we doing here? Yeah, what do we thought? It's a different sport.

I won't. I won't. Also, Thresh has a nerve, so like your whole champ played and play style is just fucking nerve. Also, it's mid. What? You never played mid? Oh, would the challenge have to be mid? Yes.

I might get cooked. Yeah, you would get cooked. You wouldn't might. Wait, no, I don't even think I would. Because my, I think the simple match. The simple math, hold on, the simple math of I'm willing to get coaching and watch videos and not approach it in the same fashion that he did. You got to approach it in that fashion.

That's the fun of it. Well, Ludwig wouldn't, which I also think, I don't blame him for. If you did this one this time around, you wouldn't go get fucking double lift to help you get gold. No, I don't think I need the coaching. Wait, that's exactly what he said. Oh. I don't think I need the coaching. Oh, I would watch the coaching.

I would watch videos. Yeah, yeah, but I think that ruins the fight. I think anyone can do it. with coaching. I think coaching that would really help that much. A hundred percent does.

It's so crazy that you think that. You know what? The big moment was that I would argue turned everything around for old slime was I was leaving the office one day and Miles

he stops me and he goes man all I ever want to see I want to be Alfred in the coffee shop at the end of Batman and you looking over at me is getting a two kill lead in mid lane and not dying the rest of the game.

He's like if that happens, I will be Alfred in the coffee shop just nodding at you. It's so funny because I actually said to him first, but I didn't put it in the context of a movie because I said to him, hey man, when you get Dark Seal Stacks and then you don't die with them, treat every minute like a kill. Yeah. I was like, if you do that, your life is so much better. Right out of my head. You needed him framed. With a Miles said the thing he always does, which is like, it's like this reference, kind of like this like video game or movie or thing. It's all I thought about it.

at the table with Anne Athewan. Yeah, and I'm at the table with Ann Hathaway. I was like, well, I can't let Alfred down. Do you think there's, it's funny because you're, you're 35. And yes. The cereal. And you got to play League of Legends on Inhibit for weeks on end, for stream to make money. Yeah.

I think you've played more than any other 35 year old in that period. Is there not even a little? Gwen Pop star. How old Gwen Popstar is. She's young. She's like in her 20s. Damn. Is there a part of you who,

because you could just have this be your other non-yard job. It could just be Liam. You could just, you could reduce the hours a little bit. You can hang out with your girlfriend a little more and still be a streamer for seven hours a day instead of 12. And you could continue either chasing this league dream or playing other games or doing something like this.

Nah, I want to be unemployed. A couple things to what you're saying to me, Mr. L.S. Is one, when I am fucking 13 hours into a stream playing Rawley Legends all fucking day, my brain gets fried to a point that I think is actually truly pretty magical. And the fact that there is just... Oh, you think the magic's gone. I think there is a magic to me just like, because I wanted it so bad.

The one where you're like almost crying, laughing, looking at the red carpet on OPG is so funny because it just keeps going. Dude, it's actually a broken man. There's a guy, there was this guy who's, he, in the pick phase, he picked Timo and he just said, I'm Tito. And then in the next

two weeks. Not two weeks. Much longer. I just said it all the time. I'm Tito. When I would start to fucking unravel at these like the end of like playing like my 20th game of league, I was like, Tito. Tito! And there was like a

magic and like how fucking Friday I would get. I have it for you if you want. What is it? I have your career laid out for you if you want. Give it to him. Give it to him. Give me my career. Let him feel it. Spit your career into my monkey. Okay. Wow. Wow. Why? Why?

We're out of no. This won't be a clip anymore. It's gold guy. The gold guy? It's the golden man. The golden man. And you get gold in every game. And once you achieve it, you want to the next game. Yeah. A saga of you getting gold in every game.

The golden man. And then you just tackle the next, you spin a wheel. Fuck, that's your next game. Would it be adjusted for inflation? I think you should, right? Like, if it's Marvel rivals, you don't go for gold there. I would go for, right. But like, whatever leagues, whatever middling rank.

Whatever league's gold is. It's the percentage. Yeah, that's what I mean. Yeah. Like top, maybe it's top half, I think is what gold is. I think, I actually straight up think he should just go for gold in every game. The goal. Yeah, but like, if you, if you do it, if you adjust for inflation, then,

And there's some games he's locked into for fucking six months, which I think for the saga of what he's doing, it's better if he actually gets gold and a fuck ton of games. I agree, but like some games, it's just stupid to go for gold. Like the Street Fighter, it would literally be a day. It's not worth, it'd be lame for people who are excited for the Street Fighter one, that it's like, oh, I played four games, and I button mash, and I'm gold now. Street Fighter would be like Master.

Like, that's the gold. This is good. Master's probably higher. Maybe. Right? No, I think it's easy to get because it gives it to you. And you could just stream for like, six or seven hours so that you don't go Tito mode.

But dude, that's, I look back, because I hate most of the shit I put out, and I hate that people are fans of me, because I don't think I deserve it. Yeah. Okay. But I will say those, like, fucked up, like, demon hours. Yeah. I think the Tito hours are fine. You just limit the amount of days.

Yeah. You only do three days a week? You only do like twice a week. Yeah, you work like a doctor. You do like three hours. You fucking overnights. Dude, you're literally, you're the white northern lion, man. No, I'm not.

I don't play, I don't play games. My one nurse, my one nurse and friend, he works. I just mean that, like, you're the guy who's in his 30s and bald and streams and has this, like, tight-knit audience that he curates and makes fun of and whatever, and you have fun, and that can be your job. Honestly, you don't have to have guilt with that. Honestly, you're a 35-year-old jinxie. Dude.

Do you mean it? I do. This is, this is my idea for you. Because jigs is probably the closest to you. Is, I have a good friend, his tag is Howler, and he's a nurse. and his schedule forever has been he works weekends two days a week and he works two

16s back to back and that's his whole work week and it's always Saturday and Sunday so what happens is he games and hangs out with the boys in Discord during the week and then on Friday and then he's gone he disappears

like off the internet for like a 48 hour period straight and we just don't see or talk to him like just disturbing news yeah he comes back he's like Charlie Kirk, what happened to me? I've been gone for so long. And you could be like him.

We can say goodbye to you at the end. And then you could go into the chamber and play two 16-hour sessions of a rank game and enter Tito mode for two days. And then you come back to us. I like the measure for him. I like the, I got a streaming schedule. I go live for these hours.

I get offline. Every once in a while I go crazy and I stay up late. I think he needs Tito mode. I think Tito mode is the part that makes it all special. Do you want to be delirious for? It's more that the fact that it incidentally happened is special rather than I'm just a guy playing video games and getting unto attention for it.

But I don't think you're just a guy playing. For me, Tito mode is a highlight, but it's not the reason I tune in. Yeah, it's not the story. The reason I tune in is the, to be clear, you're the Joker the whole time. Dude, I think I'm thinking of this. You're like, Tito is when you're hanging off the building

and you're like, drop me. But you are still the Joker. Yeah. The whole time. You're still a crazy person. The game one, you're evil. The more of thinking about this, it is 100% true. And the more I think about this, I think I would actually watch you play anything.

Yeah, that's why it could be in the game. You could go to like a local ping pong club in SoCal for 10 hours a day, and I would watch that. Try to hit gold in your corner, like 47-year-old Asian men across from you chil-os. Because they're just backhanding the fuck out of you. Like, I would watch you pursue any competitive task in this setting, and it would have a compelling narrative. I think you just like me, man. I think I'd.

I think you're just my fucking friend. Yeah, but the idea is so far. It is really fire. And the beauty of it is not a lot of people can do it and have it be a fire idea. There's an idea that's been chosen for you. You just want to see a fucking lulcowl struggle. Yeah. Fucking mud, don't you?

Yeah. The special thing wasn't league. We're just kind of into league right now, but it's not like... You know, in... It's not special. In Goodwell, Anten. Where his friends, where his friends are like... He doesn't want to use his gift to get out.

And all of his friends... I'm... Oh, one day I come to your house and you don't fucking answer the door. I'm Ben Affleck at the trash heap with you. And I'm telling you that if you don't take advantage of this unique ability... I'm gonna kill you. Just playing video games entertaining. Then I'm gonna fucking kill you.

You're gonna fucking kill you, bro. Because we would... And you're like, nah, I want to be fucking unemployed like you, man. Yeah, I want to be a fucking piece of life. I don't need more than this. I don't need to do shit, bro. And we are Ben Affleck. We are the group.

I want to come to this studio and I want to see... I want to see... I want to see 18 golden plaques. And you don't even come to the yard anymore. Because you're working on your 19th golden plaid. Yeah, because I'm playing Marvel Tocon. Yes. With my fucking Iron Man team.

Yes. And you're in silver right now and you're losing it. The gold challenge. Sharks, I'll think about it. I'll give you that. Okay. All right. Dude, we just ruined your girlfriend's life, by the way. No, no, it's a scheduled. It's a job. We need a schedule. We need stability. Yeah. It needs a framework. But jinxie is this, but for a much, much, much, much higher rank. Much higher? Yeah, I think jencies. What's he playing besides Rainbow Six? He plays the, is it? He didn't like that. He didn't like that. He didn't play Rainbow Six anymore.

Clash Royale, that's what it called? He's not even playing Clash Royale anymore. What's it called? What does he play that? He's playing, um, oh, actually, what is the name? This is the block jumpy game? Minecraft. No, it's like you're the block moving and it's like,

da, da, dun, dun, dan, dan, that you got to jump on the spikes. Oh my God, he's playing, um, the speed running game. Um, I never heard it. The one that's like, it's like, it's like, it's like you're, Super Meat Boy? No, no, no, no, no, what's it, damn it? That's what, is it new? No, no, it's old.

Ancient as fuck. I know this game, too. What's it called? Damn it? Zipper. It's the game where it's like There's one button

It's fucking jump And you're just a block And it's like Almost like a rhythm game But not really And then it's like Really tight jump timings Over and over and over

Oh is it Geometry Dash? Yeah, isn't that it? I think that is it Yeah, geometry dash I watch a couple videos on that Yeah, he plays Geometry Dash That's crazy

That's a high skill cap game Yeah and he's pretty good at it That's sick He's pretty good at that He got pretty good at clash I'm but like pretty good I mean like top point Something 1% probably

No, this is not Geometry Dash. No, Geometry Dash is the other one. I forget what it's called, bro. This is the oldest fucking group I want you to know. I would be crazy at this game. There's a game. I would be crazy and fuck you. Will you look up... It's already...

It's already happening. When you look up the YouTube video, Impossible Avatar Getaway. I grinded this game like crazy. And it's the same game. It's just skinned for the Xbox 360 the arcade. You were nasty? I was nasty.

I'm telling you, that game gets hard. Yeah, impossible. You realize impossible's in the fucking name, right? Oh, same thing. Literally the same game. I played this like crazy. This looks fun. This game has, so this is flags left. This is bullshit. You can press Y at any time, drop a flag at the

checkpoint. I would play the flagless. Oh, that's guy like that. I like that. Flagless. Yeah. And there's, you know, you can beat the entire game in a day. It's like, it's like a three level game and the third one's really fucking hard. And the second one's kind of hard. And the third one's kind of easy. He's so compelling. This is just

Rainbow Unicorn attack. Yeah, kind of. A robot unicorn. But I was, bro, dropped a flag pussy. But yeah, I was nasty at this.

It's really satisfying because everything is a one-frame move. So, like, if you slide, you instantly go into your slide. But yeah, this game's awesome. Yeah,

so that's what he plays now. You watch a lot of jinxie? Yeah, he was great. He's like you. He has a bunch of fucking ticks. Jinksi, you owe me a speed.

Except instead of Tota, he just goes, Bahrah. Bauri. Dude, he has the same, Um, he has the same facial, uh, tick that I have. Oh, the literal twitch?

This the, the ice-quinting. Maybe jinxie is just the combined elements of all of us. Oh, yeah, the germa of us. The difference is, he's playing those games, and then he's fucking drinking modellos and vaping. That's the Aiden. That's cool. Yeah, that's his Aiden power. At the Aiden part.

It's not smoke, it's some other shit. I'm a fucking hoe. Man, yeah, I hope you get back on the horse. Oh, whatever the horse. What? Zipper, can you show them the video I put in the chat? Look at this. Look at how yellow my pee is.

I was gonna say immediately, your pee is almost green. Look at how yellow it is. I didn't take a video. You uncinked the hose? You have the prostate fucking dialing back. Can we show that on YouTube? No way. You can't show urine with no penis?

The way I want you to censor it is I want you to like increase the sensor with the spurt so that they get the effect. I want it. Why can you show urine with no penis? censored a mosaic at a bigger tile rate when it goes, if that makes sense. I tried really hard to shoot this with my phone without showing my penis. Sean, iPhone is just a guy shooting his fucking penis

like the same. There's a little in the very bottom of the frame. I just cropped it. You guys can't see because I cropped it. A couple hairs. There is, it's literally just the fucking oval head of my penis. The McDonald's logo. Yeah, the pink little Patrick Star. I've been watching a

Worlds? Yeah. What's that? League worlds okay did you mean that no okay and I I'm gonna money ball league oh I heard you talking about this who your dog shit fucking players I'm gonna money ball I'm gonna find like the oldest league player ever a 32 year old I'm gonna find what's the getting on base of league like 10 CS a minute yeah it's gonna be like it's gonna be like oh there's this guy Frederick from Texas Frederick sucks ass he hasn't hit the ball but he gets on day no it's like he gets 11 CS a minute but he set a slur back in 2023 it's like all right point to the whiteboard but guess what he does

you can get him for only 40k a year because he said and yingling is your donut hill yeah yes yingo is my donut hill we gotta get yingo veneers I will say yingling explained pinch hitting to us and it was a weird

inversion of reality because he was telling us something about the world and we were like that makes sense ying thanks for the explanation because on the primo we we made fun of pinch hitting we said it was stupid yeah it does I don't know anything but then the amazon

guy right in the doorbell and he's heard barking and running into the door. Why are you laughing? Don't act so aloof. Don't act so aloofly. You don't fucking cry. You don't fucking laugh. Didn't care for it.

I found it low effort at best. You got a soft spot for some people. Yeah. I love you. you can go dearly and Travis Kelsey. We all do man. I don't care for Travis Kelsey. Well, you also stay he had the same expression that we were talking

about him the other episode. No, this is rewriting history. I do think he runs to the doorbell whenever the Amazon guy shows up. I think that. You think that about I do think that about Travis. I think after Travis catches a ball, he comes back to the huddle and Patrick Mahomes goes, good boy.

And he goes, mean it. Travis, Kelsey, arriving to the door and a sweater with bones on it during Christmas. Taylor pulling like a 40-yard string out of his ass because he got into her craft supplies. I think he listened to, I think he listened to Wood

and he's like, that's such a sick songbed, but like what do you, like you didn't mention one like, Birch or like. Yeah, yeah. It's not about trees. It's just not really about trees, is it? All right. I'm using Rocket Money, y'all. It's me. And I, you know what me? I love Rocket Money. I love a couple of different brands that I won't say all of them here because we're in a specific read. And I'm looking at Rocket Money. And I have in 2025 three Xbox 360 subscriptions. Yeah. I saw this today. Okay. And I only have one account. Right. So I don't know how that happens. This happens all the time. You bring this up all the time. I still have them. I still have Rocket Money. I have an Xbox 360 subscription or Xbox Live subscription that is only for Nick to use. And you have three more and told me I couldn't get rid of mine that I found with Rocket Money. Well, it is an Xbox 360 summer.

It's going to, I think summer is going to last forever. It's winter. It's almost winter. These subscriptions particularly cannot last forever. And Rock of Money made it very easy. It canceled them. And the reason why is because it's a personal finance app that finds and cancels yours or my unwanted subscriptions,

monitors your spending. It helps lower your bills. Well, Rock of Money does, they go to the source. So you can go to your savings. So they'll find the people who are giving this subscription. They'll find them. Take care of him. Why isn't he taken care of him?

Why isn't he taken care of for him? Because here's the thing, Rock and Money is going to go to the source. He's the source. He's the source of this problem. Let me tell you. I need someone on the Rocket Money staff to come and harm Nick. Rocket money's going to come.

They're going to hurt you. They can come and get it. The thing is Rockaway's going to clip. Microsoft won't let me cancel this because Nick stops me from touching my phone every time I try to do it. Guys, if you are, if you have a friend who does not have Rocket Money, an easy way to punish them is to just sign them up for Xbox Live like 25 times. And then one day when they finally get the only app that you need for your financial tracking. They'll learn they have 25 accounts. You also check your credit score?

This is just that. Rocket money has saved users over $2.5 billion including over $880 million in canceled subscriptions alone. The number was so big. I got tripped over saying it. They're 10 million members save up to $740 a year when they use all the apps premium features. And you can say what you want now.

I was going to say, dude, you guys should fucking cancel your unwanted descriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Rock and Money. Go to rockandmoney.com slash the yard. They'll find them for you. Go to rockandmoney.com slash the yard. Did you see what he did? No. I missed it. They'll find them for them. What do?

Don't worry about it. Go to rockandmoney.com slash the yard. You'll figure it out. You'll figure it out. It works great for us. We've used it for a long time. And maybe your friends won't they'll stop messing with you. Cancel the subscription or we'll cancel your dad on Twitter. But so it was funny because

we kind of got corrected because I think it is actually cool because you have to swap positions with the guy. Because it's strategic in a different way. Well, this is actually a beautiful thing because we're going to get lucky. The the reasonable take is going to be out first because this is the main episode and we recorded the premium first yesterday.

And you're going to go back to us being like, this baseball's dumb, bad rule. But we already said it publicly. There you go. We told the public rules, man. What do you have to say, Ludwig? I love baseball! I know you do. I know you do sweetheart. I love baseball. What do you have to say to everyone who said you weaved your way into

a dynasty? Who cares? I got a dynasty. They're mad. Mad, mad. Mad. Dynasty, mad. Probably a Mets fan. Why don't you like shitty baseball players? That's my question. I do like shitty baseball players. I like Andy Paz. That's awesome. Who's that? Three people left. Not for you.

Oh. That's what? I like that even more. I have more than three baseball fans. I haven't felt this sad after a sporting event in a long time. I didn't fucking give a shit. What is that? You had to look up who the fuck Blue Jays players were.

What do you care? But he knows where fucking Toronto is, dude. Fuck you. Fuck you. You mean the same thing that you did before you got into the team eight months ago? Go fuck.

Hold up. I went to the World Series last year. We're forgetting this. Yeah, before you were a fan. Yep. I went to the World Series before I was a fan. Woo, Steelies. I'm sorry, what was I a fan of

if I was a world series? I won't be bumped off on the Blue Jays is the only team in sports. I actually have a non-bandwagon claim to. Five players. Hmm? Five players. Guerrero Jr. Beber, the pitcher. Fucking Clement, the good hitter. Come on, man.

Get there, hey. Oh, man. He's doing good right now. Oh, man. Oh, no. Oh, no. That sucks. Oh, no.

I'm impressed by three, to be honest, except for Guerrero, Jr. There were the people we watched. Oh, Kirk. Kirk, because he just, it's crazy that he's in a professional sports league. It's crazy. And he's fucking amazing, too. All this stuff. Three, two, four.

That's it. That's it. I'm impressed by four. I don't need to defend myself. Bull B'ubert. He hit the home run. Sure. Okay.

My thing is My family didn't watch sports growing up Except baseball They watched one baseball team And it was the Blue Jays And it was the only sporting team On in our house the entire upbringing I didn't have a basketball team

I didn't have fucking football team I didn't have anything You couldn't read Harry Potter You couldn't watch SpongeBob I mean like But this is all I had So it's like the Blue Jays getting there For me

Even as somebody who isn't a huge baseball fan Is a nice thing The Blue Jays already won back to back like 30 years ago. Yeah, that's a fucking long time ago. Don't say we. Do not say we and that's funny. Don't say we. Don't say we. We needed this. You said that's funny because it was last year.

So I, I fucking, this is the only, if you want to make fun of me any other time, I'm fine with that. But the Blue Jays is the only team that I, that I have a deeper love in my soul. Let me ask you a question, Aiden, Calvin. Yeah. Which is just another man's name. Yeah. It's weird that you had another man in your name. Don't you put another man in you It was a boy And let me ask you this Is that better?

You have a boy? He's in the comics Oh boy Interesting Would you have watched Any of the World Series If Ludwig did not exist In your life?

Of course Okay I believe you I've watched I believe you And I love you I usually tune in To like the biggest

moments in sport Okay So every sport is dope When it's the grand finals That's what I'm saying Did you watch the ALCS? The Yeah

Yeah Wait, the Mariners and the Blue Jays? Yeah, because the Mariners are the only other team that I kind of care about. Right, I see. I, look, I've had this hang up with you, Ludwig. I don't have any. Girl.

And I want to clear it up because I think it's in bad faith on my end. But basically, I think being fans of shitty players and teams is sort of the backbone of sports. Yeah, I read from Mac Jones. So I don't know who that is either. Okay, this is the problem, right?

It's because he has a claim I was thinking about this He weaved his way into a dynasty But he does have a claim Because he just lives here And he's lived here for a long time And it's not crazy to become a fan Of like your local sports team

I don't think it's crazy He just happens to be in a city With the Dodgers and the Lakers If Shohay was on the devil race No Yeah the devil race Would you Actually if he was on the third Reich

The only thing I could Which would be This is a lot This is a lot Because when homie Was on the Angels And they sucked dick And we lived closer to Anahe

You didn't give a shit No no I went to a game I got a jersey I went to a game I went to show hey dude I think I remember that Yeah I went I went to one I went to one angel's game

I saw Shohei I was like oh that guy's cool And then I bought a jersey And then I called myself The biggest Angels fan Who's never watched an Angels game Because I never watched a game I probably seen more

The Angels games in you. A hundred, I went to one. I lived next to the fucking stadium growing up. Yeah, I mean, we lived real close. And they gave him Little Caesars when he walked in. I went to two, I think I went to two dates. Because it was dog shit cheap. You beat me.

You went to baseball games as dates? Yeah, we didn't watch the game at all. First date. Wow. And I was just like, this shit's ass. It was ass. I remember I went with... But the rally monkey time, that is pretty awesome. They got a rally monkey.

What's a rally monkey? They have a monkey they bring out. No fucking way. It's pretty dope. And the whole stadium light changes And it's like rally monkey time And everyone goes nuts And then everybody spits in the monkey

Yeah we all and the monkey And the monkey was in the middle of the field And we all What? No, don't spit Oh my god! Hello! Is that the monkey? Yeah, it's the monkey

They have a capuchin? Yeah, they got a capuchin. Yeah, I... Fuck, you went to an angel's game. This was the most lit part by a lot. I love the rally monkey. Yeah, the rally monkey's cute. Believe in the power of the rally monkey.

And let me tell you, there is no power behind that rally monkey. Huh? It's like you're a Lakers fan and you're not a clipper's fan. Yeah, I don't even I'm just not that in a baseball relative But I like Lakers more

So the fact that the Dodgers are doing well And that Chohay is doing well And he's like a legendary player Make it exciting no matter what Uh huh But would you still love him if he sucked Would I still love him if he sucked Probably not him the player right?

He wouldn't even know I wouldn't even know I think the better question is Would you love the team if they sucked But they still had this player on I'm saying my dad loved the Cubs His whole life Right

And the Cubs suck. And he got that street cred for luck, liking this whole... Yes, and they won. And how do you... What do you process that as a sports fan? And that's... People bring up, it's like, oh, you're a Patriots guy, your fucking Dodgers guy.

Yes. No, I get this, and that's the admirable sports fan is when you're fan of like this shit, like a Jets fan. But isn't this... You're an admirable... Because of where he's lived. No, that's what I'm saying.

It's like they just all... It's like where he's lived just happened to be teams that are good. Yeah, I genuinely tripped into liking Shohay because I went to an Angels game and I fucking was obsessed with Japan and the Japanese guy was the best guy on the team

and then I was like oh wow this guy rules but then I didn't watch the Angels because I didn't give a shit about baseball and I didn't like fucking understand it and then he went to the Dodgers

I was like I'll show up and then I've been watching since sure but you know like this is just time will buff this out time buffs every 20 years will pass and I'll still be going to

Dodgers games and we're going to say the same shit we're going to be like bro it was all it comes back to Japan for you by the way Yeah, that's all right, though. Because I don't think it's a bad thing that Japan got me in a baseball.

No, if anything, that's what the MLB wants. I'm just a doc kid, but for baseball. Sure. Yeah. Like, Shohey Otani just got a bunch of people in a baseball, and I'm just one of them. I did not watch before, but he got me in. Okay. With that beautiful smile of his and awesome skin.

I think that's reasonable, and he also has put on a little weight, and I think maybe he should go on a diet. Showe? Yeah. Showy did not put on weight. He put on weight. Showie got more muscular. He's got another chin.

Look up Shohiotani squatting. Oh, he squat a lot? Yeah, he's way stronger than you. Is there a video from the back? Can show he otani squatting from the back? Is there a video from below? Oh, dude, this Shoheyotani from the fucking, from the floor cam? Show hey.

By the way, I'm skinny. You're skinny? I'm like 180. Show us the tummy. Show us the tummy. Show us your nasty. You're nasty little tin. Oh, you look good, man.

Oh, my God. Alright, now do the thing. I can't even do it. Try it. Try it. You're lying to me. You're lying. I'm so snatched, no.

Ludd, you can do it. Dude. I need the skinniest you've ever been is when we met you and you could do it back then. I'm so skinny now. I can't even do it. I'm snatched and you guys are mad about it. Whatever, bro. I don't get mad when you succeed in life.

That's what the fucking liberal media wants you to think. Do you think our collective weight is lower or higher from the start of the show to now? I'm definitely. Way more. Way higher. Wait, you're way more now. I probably way. And when we started? We very much, yeah, you can see in the trailer that we shot, where we make fun of you a lot,

which never happened on the show later on. I'm pretty skinny. I was like 10 pounds heavier. Yeah. When the show started. Actually, no. You're a big guy most of the time. Fuck, I don't know.

I hit 200 pounds. I feel like our collective heaviest is like episode 80, like around that. Hmm. 80? Yeah. Well, I was on Adderall for a little bit and I couldn't work out because my back hurt. So I was just not eating and not building any muscle. So I was probably the skinniest I've been in my adult life 30s. Everyone stopped working out. Um, yeah, man. I'm only Christian. Christian's the only one working on. Christian. Christian's the only one of them. Christian's the only one of those. Christian has to get big for Kelby. That's right. Kelby asked Christian to get big for him and he's working on. Kelby's strong boy. Don't even want that joke to play on the pod. Kelly want a strong boy. Why not? I hate that Kelby wants Christian to be a strong boy? he needs to be his strong little man I think it's what it's building up to what he's gonna build up I have to bleep that we don't have to bleep anything

I come in here to say I'm gonna bury an axe in Kelvin's head I'm putting my foot down I'm putting my foot down we can't have that can't have any of that can't have any of that one we can't be saying shit about Kelvin anymore

I'm putting my foot down I had to be nice to him today you had to be nice to him why fucking suck I ain't yelled at I didn't yell at him. I didn't yell at. I didn't yell at because I said I was going to bury an axe and fucking kill me his head. And then he comes in, he can't tell me like that.

I'm working, I'm listening to a five plus minute spiel about how evil Kelby is and how he makes evil decisions and that he's going to get killed with an axe. And I decided, I decided. And Kelby asked me, he's like, Nick, do you think that I'm evil? And I said, well, what's the context? Which isn't the right answer? Which isn't the right answer? I don't like that you believe in any context. What context you think he's evil in?

It's a great question. I gave a great example. I said if Kelly was, Kelly, what it was said. Kelly was crazy. Simple mistake. Freudian slip. If Kelby was put into a trolley problem, where on one side of the trolley is his whole net worth.

And the other side is the life of a man, but he doesn't have to know them and he won't see them die. That he pulls the lever to save his money. And that would be a scenario in which he'd be. evil. He's trolley problem evil. Would he do that? He said yes. He didn't deny it. No, he tried to make a joke. No, no, he said, uh, he said, uh, he said, do I know the man?

He started asking questions. And I said that is, that's fair, you should ask. Context of, that's the context that you're evil in. Not day to day to day, evil. He used to he has the ability to be evil. I think I think maybe he's a little calorically evil. Each wing stock. I think all humans have the ability to be evil. Is it true? I don't. I don't. I think we are, we are born with only goodness in our I think we're born with evil and we just haven't been given the opportunity to express it yet. I think a baby's soul is tainted by sin. I think a baby is born in sin. I think all babies will grow up to be awesome. This is where we're at. Yeah. This is what happens with you

you've delayed the pod two hours because you got a nosebleed. We did wait two hours. Hold up. Not because I got a noseble because I thought I had strep. And you didn't. I'm a Scientologist. Wait, wait, wait. You met a Scientologist? Yeah. Okay. I never, I never, what happened? You got, like, lost on the way home. What happened? I didn't get lost. I missed my flight.

You just missed it straight up? Yeah. So you can't blame the- So you can't blame the Canadians. What? Is that you took the dinner? What are you talking about? Took the dinner?

You messaged me for a dinner recommendation and you said, I met a new person? Oh my God, no. So I was at the airport and I'm wearing my Dodgers gear because I only brought one pair of clothes because I had to go from the airport to the stadium?

No, because I can't bring that in. You could bring it into the stadium? No hotel. So I brought literally nothing. Yeah. That's kind of money. In the airport, and I'm wearing my daughter's gear, a guy comes up, he fists on me, he goes,

go Dodgers. Nice. And I'm like, yep, he's like, crazy game. And I was like, crazy. It was crazy. And he was like, you know, talking about it. And he's like, you and your buddy go? Because I was sitting next to this guy, and I started on my phone.

And I was like, oh, it's just me. And the guy hasn't said anything yet. And then he's like, bottom of the ninth. And I was like, double play, right? Guy next to me goes, no. I'm a Blue Jays fan. It wasn't a double play then. Oh.

And then we get to chat And then the guy across from me He gave me the fist of him He's like, he's like, what do you do? And I was like, YouTuber And as I say that, a fan comes up They go, Ludwig, like three girls, They go, can we get a picture?

And I'm like, duh, ladies, ladies. I guess that trifle play for me. Hey, buddy, can you take this picture for us? Hey, hey, Toronto. Hey, T, right here. So I take the picture, I take the picture, I sit down, and then I'm like, do you do and the guy's like actor maybe you've heard of the pit I was like oh it's big

and I was yeah I was like I was like I was like okay all right and then we turn over to Toronto man's next to us and we go what do you do and the guy's like well it's not as cool as that I'm a brain surgeon actual use of it we're all like no oh my god that's that is that's the coolest yeah we got mugged by a brain surgeon a kid hooked up to an ivy can I get a picture with you. He's like, not now! I hate your shit.

What sort of imposter syndrome where you've made it? You're a brain surgeon where you're like, it's not as cool to you guys. It's like, maybe he knows. He's being humble,

he's being humble. Let's verse his peak with income. Because then he's like, because I'm like, that job's crazy. And he's like, ah, it's like a job. You know, all jobs have it stresses.

And I'm like, dude, I fuck up a YouTube video. It's a 10 out of 10, whatever. You fuck it up. That patient dies on the operating table. Yeah.

And then you have to tell family that you did that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it's also complicated and hard. It's not the same. So we went in the wrong part of Timothy's brain and he's not going to be able to talk to you anymore. His name is now Travis Kelsey. We fucked up the surgery. Let's go. But anyway, the guy made a group chat. The guy made a group chat. Oh my God. The actor guy is like, let me make a group chat for all three of you. Yeah. And he titled it the brain surgeon Dodgers. That's so funny. If the earth, if we had to kill everyone on Earth, and had to leave three types of people. That's a great. We got an actor, we got the internet guy,

and we got a brain surgeon. We're all good. Me and the actor are hitting the same thing. No, no, no. TV and you two are different. They're not different for apocalypse. I only eat food while doing one. You need like a farmer for one.

No, those brain surgeons got that. And yeah, and so then the brain surgeon's in town for a couple weeks, and so I gave him some regs. That's really funny. Dude, you asked, okay, can we be real?

Because he called me Saturday night Friday night because you were going to go to the game seven and he was like you want to go and it's like Can I back up?

Please. So I had two tickets because I had to get two and I was down to get two because I was going to ask my mom to go and she said yeah right she never passport

Right so then I asked Aiden if he wants to go because I know he's a Blue Jays fan he said no I had a good reason and then and then I was like you know I'll probably sell the ticket

and I was telling QD about this got funny what you're like yeah so I asked my mom I asked Aiden that slime no I hadn't asked slime at this point okay I'm like ready to sell the ticket you will get there though and then cutie's like he's like ass slime and I was like he's gonna say no

and she's like no he won't so I call her on speaker I call him on speaker in front of her it says no it's like a two minute call I was hemming and hawing he he hams and haws for like 45 and he's like yeah yeah yeah And I'm like, you just want to say, I won't play league.

He's like, yeah, yeah. I will say this. Oh, for one, I was like. Yeah, I'd like, you clocked it. He clocked me the same way before this, by the way. He was like, so you're just going to stay home and play Counterstrike? Like, no, no. Well, mine was the, my answer was yes.

But I did say to him, I was like, you must be scraping the resin pipe of your fucking contacts here. But apparently it was third line. You couldn't sell the seat? Huh? No, I sold, I sold it. You sold it? How much? I sold it for like 12K

Damn But I will say this If I had hit gold before you called I would have gone with you You don't know how much This is taking my life over Because honestly having another person Would have been a nightmare

I wish I'd go with you Because the travel was so fucked I wish I had gone with you Because stain meant that I went to basketball And I fucking fractured my thumb Yeah he was wearing a fucking A brace yesterday No

I had a big brace on And then I messaged a lot who is an orthopedic resident and he looked at a video and I told him like what's going on with it what type of fracture it is and he's like the brace they gave you doesn't do anything for this

you can just take it off that's pretty awesome so you get to wait how long like six weeks I'm gonna go tomorrow see an orthopedic surgeon and find out how bad it is and if I need surgery aided after this

anyway I told him to ask Sunla and then he said to me that's racist Sunla is Taiwanese yeah I'm like I don't think he said Sunla because of his race. I think he said it's a friend that might enjoy it. I thought of him because Japanese players are on the team. That's crazy.

It's crazy. I think that you thought that. Because when you think of baseball, you think of Japanese people. And then he mentioned an Asian man. I haven't mentioned Sunlar hung out with him in like... That's why I thought it was a good idea. You haven't talked to him.

It would be a great reason to hang out with an old friend. An old flame. It's not an old flame. Okay. Imagine a romantic gateway in Toronto? What's more romantic than that? about it. It's not romantic guys and you guys made it weird. Oh, it's sexual though.

You guys make it weird when I have new friends and I think it's because you're insecure about losing me as a friend. Yes, yes, yes, we're going to do it forever. And so you try to ostracize new friends that I have. Yes. Dude, the reason why I suggested Sunla is because I thought it'd be a good idea. Dude, we hash this out on the premo. How would the fuck would that be a good idea? Because he maybe likes baseball.

You gotta hear his, you gotta hear his take. We won't go too much because we did on the primo. We can spend a light and out of time on this. Slive said that your hangout dinner for Halloween was friend slop. Oh, it was friend slop. Yeah, there's so many people there that it was friend slop. And how intimate of a gathering. It's like all of our close personal friends. We asked if you remove Michael and Lily, is it no longer

friend slop? He said it's still friend slop. Of course it's friend slop. Wait, what is it? What is it mean? And I was like, if that's friend slop, what does it even mean? Yeah, what is it? So you can't hang out with more than one friend? No. So I said no to head do that. I, I concocted a theory of friend slop. And I think that any group that grows too large where there's two

separate conversations or more happening becomes friend slop and I think the upper limit of that is four. After, once you hit five people now. So like is a family reunion friend slot? Of course. Yes. That's family slot.

Same concept. So Thanksgiving dinner or blood slop. Yeah. So like a birthday party is Friend slop. Birth slop. So this is friend slop. No. Four people. There's five people. Zipper laughs. He doesn't contribute verbally

Except laughing He is like God So when we have a guess It's friend slot Yes 100% It actually is So just being in the office

Is slop Depends on the office So you can see how we felt Confused by this This is the dumbest shit You're getting the theory right 100% It was such an intimate group

At Halloween That's what I said So much slop That's what I'm saying Huh? No it wasn't slop It was like just people That I love

That I invited to my home Of course Which is friend slop No No His mind works in such a beautiful I didn't want to go And then I'm glad I did

We learned a beautiful lesson today It's like we discovered Or It's like I know that Because he's that way That's why I want to watch him play Solo cute You have to take the good

I have to take the good I have to take the good with the bad I have to take the good with the bad We haven't asked me Go on a Wii In damn fucking Skones age Oh you do like going to Wii I want to go Wii

I want to see big Pecker. The issue is a group of five, so I don't think you'd like it. What? Yeah. It's too many people. Dick Slop. It's different. It's Dick Slop. If it's five balls is that slob? In one sack? Yeah. God damn. That's Dick Slop. That's cool. God damn. No, you have a diseased mind. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Makes me good at some things and bad at other things. Two of the people are just my aunt and my mom. Um, it could be like me, You, Nick, my... It could be me, you, your girlfriend, my mom, and my aunt.

You'd be like, ugh, friend slop. One of those has to go. And I argued all girlfriends go. Oh, yeah, and his friends... Girlfriends make it slop. Well, I would just say they're the first to go. Yeah. Because they make it slop.

They make it slop. The girls make it slop. Swap queens. I hear you, yes. Queens of slop. They're queens of the slop. The girls make a slop and we can't have them around. Because we don't want it to be sloppy.

no more. I like what I'm trying to say. I get you. You get me. Don't say no. No, I didn't want to go and then I was glad I did because I thought I was explaining to these guys. I was like, the way you described it, that's why I was confused when I was texting you, because you were like, do you want to have dinner with me and my mom? And I was like, oh my God, like that's so weirdly personal. I was like, yeah, sure, I'd love to. You asked me that like last week. And then it was like a friend slop. And I was confused. That's why I was like, where are we going? What You blindsided him. You were just like coming to my house.

Do you think, do you think I had a thought this week is you've been, we used to live together and we lived in a group setting for a long time. Yeah, that was house slop. And then even after you moved out, you had a long period of time where you lived with other people. You had Josh who had Miles. And now we've entered this new age period where you're unemployed. You got to stop saying

You are fun employer You're honest You're not unemployed You're fun and shit What the fuck you're talking He's a freelancer You're a freelancer You're unemployed

You're unemployed And you stream games by And you're at home alone a lot now And I worry about you Like I'd worry about like an uncle I haven't seen in a while You know Do you think you're becoming more antisocial

Are you getting more pleasure? What are you talking about? Are you getting enough pleasure? I'm not fucking, yes. I pleasure and get all the pleasure I need for myself I feel like we... Okay, that's good. I feel like when we all live together, we gave you a nice layer of social baby lubricant. Yeah, where you can join the Discord call, if you will, whenever you like and leave whenever you like it. You just fucking kill yourself, dude. I just want to God. And now I'm worried that the social lubricant is gone. And we don't we don't see you as much. That's, okay, this, what you were talking about this like two, three years ago in the pod, and the answer is still the same, but I will say this pod existing is crucial. Yeah. If this pod doesn't exist, I am a way different person with how I hang out. I think if this pod doesn't exist, you might be in Tito mode forever. You would go in Tito mode and never come out. I think we'd think you would be normal, but I like him.

I'm saying that I'm worried about, I'm worried about, I'm worried. I'm worried. about the longer you go living alone, especially with the pot, at least we have the pot is like this safety mechanism, right? One day you'll drift through the veil of Tito mode and never come back. One day, listen to me, one day, I will move to the desert and I will talk to nobody. I don't like that. I don't want you to do it. We don't want you to do that. But no, I'll talk to you like. Okay, that was a quick switch. Hell yeah, hell yeah. Okay, great. But I'm going to move to the desert. Okay. And I'm going to live there in a weird little place. Okay. Okay. And I'll be on Discord all the time. You're...

That's what I want. What if we're not? Am I crazy? What if we're not on Discord? You're so close to living, like nothing about how you live now is different from this, except the setting of where you're home is.

No, because we ended in the show. When the show's over, I go to the desert. Why the desert? I like it. Okay. I like it. Have you lived in the desert?

Uh, I've lived in a step climate. Okay. Yeah. Yes. It's somewhat of a desert I just mean that there's nothing stopping you from being a discord all the time Do you just mean like Phoenix? No

No, not Phoenix I probably like Palm Desert Okay You get in like a hotel in Palm Springs? Yeah And it's a weird looking place The weird little place does it have a bathroom There's probably a bath That's good

It's not weird desert that's like retirement desert It would be like It'd be like a cathedral city You gotta go to Yucca Valley though Yeah some shit like that Blair? Who? I don't even know where Blair is.

No, Blythe, I mean, it's life. No, that's different. That's not different. That's like, that's like, uh, courage of the cowly dog. Yeah. Middle, yeah. Yeah. We're talking, we're talking.

It'd be crazy if you're talking, fucking Yucca Valley. Yeah, yeah. It'd be fucking, you know, that kind of desert where it's just like we got a little farmer's market, a Denny's, a bunch of racist people, a bunch of really nice people. You just became an insane Tito streamer in the desert? I'd be the desert man. Oh, my. I'd be the desert man.

I'd be the desert man. I want to be the desert man. I want to be the desert man. You be the desert man. But I like it. But this, I love this show. Yeah. So, but if the show ever ends, I will become the desert man.

So that's what I'm trying to say. That's what I'm going to Sweden. You're the desert man. We're like the four elements. I'll go somewhere snowy. Well, that's Aidan's got that. I'll go somewhere wet. Okay.

I'll go somewhere wet. I'm going to go somewhere finally. I'm going to live in the rainforest. No, you're the earth. No, I guess I'm the earth. I'm going to go somewhere with fire. Yeah, you go live in the grass. in the on the equator.

In the JFK's Eternal Flame we're gonna have a home in there. Ooh. And you could have a home too in the Patreon which is the episode

that's now on the Patreon. This is me choking you out for not joining. It's actually Ooh. Stop choking. I like it. It's anti-making me.

Stop choking him. That episode is actually shot yesterday so it's a bit of a time warp. Yeah. If you can wrap your head around that. Nice. Finally you get what you deserve.

Idiot listening. But we'll see you next week when Ludwig is he dies from strep throat stop oh oh oh strep alert i don't like that i don't like it