The Yard - Ep. 229 - Taking Her to Disney! (w/ Fanfan)

Episode Date: December 10, 2025

This week, the boys are joined by Fanfan! They talk about her beginnings as a streamer after college, the future after streaming, and how she was tricked by Ludwig at Disney... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Who the fuck is Fiona? Who's that? Who's that? Who's talking? Did you think her name was... Did I think her name was Fan Fan? Did I think her name was Fan? I think that when we are given a name from the government

when we are born, it is our job to shed that name. Yeah, and it shouldn't come from Shrek, I think. I think if our parents' name off has your Shrek, we should get a free gun. If she was here, we could ask her. We could be like, did your parents name you after the love interest in Shrek about the ogre? But because she's not, it could really only be that?

I'm just so sad on the fact that he was like, yeah, Fan, Fan. That's probably a tiny, in origin. I'm saying that. He's Fon Fond. That's easily could be a Swedish name

but that's on Deerian too. Fan, fan. Yeah. And I think that's what you thought. I didn't think any I don't think about anything. You know what I do? I came in,

I played Bellatro in front of Dan I'm teaching him the game and every round I go, I fuck my sister! He does, he has been doing that a lot and he keeps coming up to any he whispers in my ear. He says,

and I fuck my sister and I like you. The only thing you can say anymore. all the time. How long can we talk about that until we let her come down? Well, do you want to introduce her French man who loves incest? Sure, but I would like to present Fennifer!

Let's see it. Yay, oh my God! Good job. That might be the least graceful. I've seen it. I do think she achieved a speed that I haven't seen. There was a top speed velocity, but you have to, you know, it's a balance because you go too fast. was really scary. You start to realize the kid's slide.

And you're welcome to the Yard podcast. No. I thought we started. Have you seen this? We started, yeah. You know what? Good question. Have you seen a single episode? Oh, I know. No. I listened to Liam's episode because I heard it was really good. Really? I do love Liam. It was a psychological exploration. Yeah, what do you think of him? I don't know. I was playing Sudoku during it. Okay. Okay. But Liam's cool. What do you mean playing Saddo? Like you have a book? like 100 Sudoku book. No, on my app.

Sudoku Daily. So it's one of those things I feel like, you know, famously you can do also while listening to something else. Sometimes you've got to lock in on the numbers. Are you high level Sudoku? Are you doing, or is it three by three or are you higher than that? Is it always three by three? No, nine by nine.

No, it's bigger, right? It's always out of my nine. Doesn't it get bigger? Guy who like, Sudoku, how many squares? How do you make Sunoku is harder? It's like the math. number of numbers that are already there.

But there's like a cap. You can't just keep making it bigger. No, they don't know. I suppose never make it bigger. You keep, you're really obsessed with it. They never make it bigger.

He saw it like AI Rubik's cube. That was 47 by 47. That was Sudoku. Fan, Fan, what's the big? That's AI. It doesn't count.

No, this is like a thing. I've never tried Bigger Sudoku before. Big Sudoku. The Daily 60s. The Daily 60s. Oh, my God.

It's text additional letters. I don't know what the letters are about. It's hexadecimal. I don't know what the letters are about. Now we're getting too far, bro. You can modify Okerany of Times code with this Sudoku. That's right.

There was these little books at the grocery store when you check out and a lot of them are like cryptograms and different types of puzzles and a lot of Sudoku. And I remember seeing that like the pages, they always get bigger and bigger. Oh shit. And I was like, that's crazy. I'm never going to do that.

That doesn't sound fun. Sounds like torture. Why Sudoku can I? I don't know. I think it's like an Asian thing. I just like numbers. Ooh, so I feel that too sometimes You're just not a very Chinese time in your life

I know, I've always loved numbers It's weird What do you think of Ludwig being Chinese I think it's fair I think I've read stuff about him Being racist for learning Chinese I think it's fair I think it's decent

I think he could be Chinese Yeah Do you find it odd that he jumps From Asian culture to Asian culture Specifically Yeah Like specifically No maybe he's just Asian

on the inside. Yes, thank you. It's not weird because I'm Asian on the inside. A year ago, he was Japanese. And it's like, where are we doing here? The Asian Rachel Dolazol? I got 99% of the way there. I was a little off. I was on the wrong coast.

So you're saying you've arrived at your true self. Like, I felt like it was there, but I was like something was off. And I was like, maybe. We're so happy for you. Thank you. Congratulations. Congratulations.

To be Chinese. Thank you guys. That's weird, though, right? Can we like Like it's fucking weird She already said it was decent I think it's like updated bio Like big news

And it just says Chinese now Chinese now Dixerto article Ludwig Chinese now It's just him going to like this Well they filled the French hole with you I am not French you are not Chinese I fuck my sister

or you do other things I don't know I didn't hear you say that earlier Yeah how do you feel about I'm saying that Well I just wasn't sure if he was pronouncing it weird pronouncing what part fuck my sister oh you're pretty good fuck my sister

I thought you were to say he is pronouncing it it's so funny because they would never say sister the way you say it how okay please you say like Lumiere please go you would have sister

Loumier fucks his sister and she is a chandelier yeah yeah I don't want to say please I thought about it we were on we were in France and he did

whole bit about he got molested as a child as a French person. And now he's too squeamish to tape. He also, I mean, he has a French sister. I think it makes it a little weird. Oh, yeah. I said, so soon that he bit, it happened. I was 70 to set for me. Have you been to France? Fan, fan. Yes. I used to learn French because Canadian. Ah, but you're Canadian. I'm bad at French. I didn't know that. And I think it's all right that you're doing that. Yeah, thank you. Just giving you that. I think it's okay that she's doing that. Thank you. It was very. really upset it. You know, the Paris

bombing came in a really bad time for me. I was supposed to go to Paris for exchange, like an exchange semester to practice my French, and then the bombing happened. And I was like, could they wait? Now who made the decision? Was it you? To bomb? No, to not

go. Oh. Oh, no. The school didn't let me anymore. What? That's fucked though. That's what I'm saying. Like, it already happened. Yeah, I'm not going to hit the same place again. Are you Drake's side or Northern Lion's side? Uh, Northern Line side.

Okay. Sorry, I forgot where Drake was from. Yes. But you knew where. I forgot about six. Yeah. I was like,

I thought Drake was also on the west side. I remember I was talking to you. It was like a year ago now. We did that cooking burger shop. Yeah. And we were talking out back and I was like, so what do you do with your time nowadays? You're like,

what do you do on stream and stuff like that? Because I don't know. I don't watch. And you're like, I play a lot of league. And I kind of like, I was like, oh my God.

Like you told me like cancer. I was like, oh my God, you're okay, like, oh my God. And then you said, no, it's been awesome. Yeah, that was. And I, a year later, would go on my own league journey and now I understand it. What role, what rank, what champ? I play support only, which is really bad for, you know, women PR. But I do play support only.

The girlfriend role. Yes. And my favorite. There's only one champ, really, you can't play. Who do you play? Oh, I do play that one. Yeah, I play all the girly ones. I play Lulu, Zaira. I do love you, me. You play the cat? I love when I get to play You Me. To kill yourself. Rank check. I peaked Emerald 2. Oh, yeah.

Sit, God. Is this it gold goblers? My God. Platinum jungles equal to Emerald Umi, they say. Honestly, I hate that you're right. I don't play her that much, only when they're like, you could play Umi. And I'm like, I can. For dessert. Yeah, I can play it if you want me to. Do you get crazy flamed for being a girl?

On league? I type like a boy on league specifically. Anyone else is nuts itch? My balls are smelling today. Whoa. They don't know a chag membership? Like, how do you type like boy? Like I make sure to do like frat boy.

misogynist, sexist, racist role play in text. I'm like, bro. What's your account name? Like, what do they see? What is it right now? I think it's only fan fans. So that's kind of interesting, right?

Because then you're disguising yourself as a fan of yourself, like a male fan of yourself. Are you streamer mode? There's streamer mode on leak? They put it in. Oh, dear. I haven't played in six months.

Oh, okay, that makes sense. That makes sense. A lot of new stuff. A lot of new stuff. You know about Atacom? Oh shit. Yes, I do. Atta con.

Sorry, I couldn't hold myself back. He's from Jamaica. Yeah. I couldn't hold my home. Well, he's gone now. His Jamaican accent is really good. Who's heard it? Ludwigs?

Right? Is it? It's bad. It's funny. What do you guys tell me to think? It's like you play Super Smash Bros. It's against the best person in your house and then you go to a tournament, which is here. And that's the real.

And this is the Jamaican accent tournament? Yes. It's a delusional. You're so far more delusioned. I'm delusioned. You know your fear about my, you know. Bro's going to too, bulls. We played CS here last night.

Wow. It was so weird. Yeah, we did a land. Yeah, we landed, dude. That sounds so fun. We did a land. We went 0 for 4. It was really good because Emily was using his account.

Wait. Yeah. That's fine. That's fine. Okay, Emily was using his account. I don't get a fuck. And then someone recognized them after we played them. So it looked like Eric Coots went two and 18.

No, no, no, no, no. She went one in 16, bro. We're playing on dust. And me and Yingling's accounts are named Piggy 1. What's the squad? It's me, Squeaks, Ludwig, Fan, Fan, and Extra Emily. That's a crazy squad. But Extra Emily is genuinely out there shooting herself in the head every round.

Right, right. And it's tough. And Squeaks. stole Aiden's PC Dude Actually stole it And made Aiden use Kelby's PC

Which Dude you got bitch You got a mom I did I did I got off of my PC For him to try it And then we just never swapped back

You are pathetic And then he changed my keybonds Yeah yeah You're a pathetic coward Yeah Isn't that disgusting You're disgusting for letting a man do that To you

After one and a half games Aiden shut down And I was like How are you doing He's like, I'm leaving out of this one. What happened? Hold on, I had to go on. I had to go on.

Guys, I promise, I have to go. The vibes are really funny because when he first arrived at the PC, he was like, we got this guys. Yeah. He was fist bumping all around. He was like, nice try, next time. And by the end of it, he was going, oh, well, the user was happening is,

it's miserable. Aiden's making calls, right? Aiden's like, in like, one graveyard two site, and then, and then, and then Emily walks in and I don't know where fucking graveyard or site are. And he definitely doesn't We've had 20 years to know Graveyard And

If the new business I give you that I did I see him going Smashing his headset Messaging the other team Like we're okay So this girl's part of a special program We let her dunk the ball And then everyone in the stadium claps

And then we go back to the game But just for this one play So you got pissed No The only person I was actually mad I was quick I didn't get pissed For robbing the PC.

I didn't get pissed at it. And then we went into a game. It's for having fucked up keybonds. Why are they weird? He doesn't have a... Old school weird shit, bro. He doesn't have his like nades like bound to anything.

So you have to like scroll through them. He scrolls for nade. That's game of shit. No, he taps four to get to the right nade. Which I like way better because I'm fucking mashing my head on Yingo's keyboard because I'm trying to figure out

which fucking button is Nade versus Mali. I didn't have my, uh, diffuse. Oh yeah. That was funny. That's a crucial one. That cost us a few. You don't need it if you don't let them plant. Aiden leaves and then we have a fill.

And then fan fan's not talking in game. I'm like, talking game. She's like, I'm nervous. They were randoms. Because it's a random and I'm a girl. So then it's smooth things over. I hopping and I go, girl, ew. And then what do you say?

He said, why are you gay? Yes. Why are you gay? He did say when a Russian accent, why are you gay? And then you had a bunch of money and you wouldn't buy anyone because you're too slow in the buy menu. Yeah.

And so he goes... Typical woman. Typical woman have money but never spends it or something. Just getting all the stereotypes wrong. Yeah, the wrong thing. Yeah. In a Russian accent too.

Yeah. Well, what? Okay, can I ask, surely there are better games to boot up than counter strike? Yeah, why did we play CS? Because we walked in on you playing CS and Squeaks also really wanted to play.

Squeaks loves playing CS. I was playing Diabas. Oh, yeah, that's true. He was, bro. He didn't play a Diablo, bro. Which one? Diablo four. Wow.

That's weird. I know. I walked in. All my friends are shocked. I just think we're shocked. Because I only play one game. Yeah. Very good, buddy.

A new game. Crazy. Fletters is there. All right. We should flex two league. I mean, you guys, we had this conversation about being a gamer. And like, you haven't played, if we pull up. I guess I was just trying being a gamer out.

Pull up Game Awards. of the year nominations. I think if we go through the past 10 years, you're over. I just wanted to try a silly little game. Probably, like, Expedition 33, Wu Kong, the Eldon Ring. I don't think he's hit one ever.

Wait, what's the one game you play? Aiden. Right now, Counterstrike. He plays Counterstrike. He'll do like one multiplayer game and just get addicted. Biffin, are you a gamer? How many of these he played?

Only two. Sam. Was it Donovan? No, it was Expedition 33 and Silk Song. Nice. Okay. What was your first video game? First, like,

PSP, does that count? Yeah. Yeah, it's like first ever. Is it a Grand Turismo? Wait, how old are? No. Okay. Can I ask how old are you are?

How old are you? How old are you? Is what we were asking? 25. Okay, okay, okay. PSP first, that makes sense? That's fucked up. I was like, PSP, your first game? Dude, can I come clean?

I need to apologize to you. To me, specifically, or all of us? No, I'm just looking at you, but her. Oh, sure. That's, does that make you feel respected? You ran a bus once, me and you. Oh, okay. And I was asking how old you were.

And you said 25. Or no, you said guess maybe, like the classic. And I said 30. I think that's a compliment, though. And I said it because I dead ass thought you were my age. And then you said 25. And I was like shell shocked. Because I thought you'd like streamed as long as me.

But I feel like. Oh, no, I started in like end of 2020. Whoa. What was that? Where were you at in life? Why COVID? What was the big switch? You're just COVID like what were you doing for work or whatever? I was a student. I was in She was about to go to gayberry. Is it bombed the fuck out of it? That's all straight. So what's the apology? What's the apology? For saying you look or not I didn't say you look. I just added this now. It's for saying you're 30. No, I decided it's a compliment to me. Okay. I decided I

I like when people think I'm older. Okay. How long do you think that'll last though? Until I'm 30. Yeah, yeah. And then it's really diminishing returns. I'll be looking for the answer, 21. 21?

You did that yesterday? It was really embarrassing. No, it's good. It's badly in public. No, it's in here. It's back. I like it. It hit.

It hit there too. I think it's good. And Piggy, too. What was your first, what was the game of you're streaming when you started? Uh, league. League. League.

Oh, wow. My PC was so bad. It couldn't run a fast. Homophobia or fall guys Oh, the league is beautiful They can't run league yeah God the game is so awesome Yeah you run that on the smart fridge that gives you schizophrenia

And then league gives you the schizophrenia Dude, were you good at school Yeah Like what college are you going to? You see Berkeley Oh shit Berkeley did you graduate? I did But my GPA was like it was horrible

It was like 2.7 or something What's your degree in? Biochem and philosophy That's crazy A double major? do you like Sart or Camus more Camus? Yeah Probably

That's fine to say Is it okay What dude What? What do you know What knowledge? Yeah Do you like Shart or coming poo more

Fuck y'all If you get under a 3.0 from Berkeley You should get like a Cal Poly slow degree instead They said you a different degree Yeah you shouldn't just Like can you get like a degree from Harvard With a 1.4 Dude do you get over the line

Well, 1.4 is too low. 1.4 is like a D plus. 2.0? Yeah, too. Yeah, easily. That's crazy. Getting a 2.0 from Harvard and they send you a UCR degree anyway.

Yeah. Finishing below it. And communications don't matter. How many credits did you do? I don't know. You did a shit ton. Yeah. For a double major in those two

because those two are unrelated. I was, I didn't go to school. I was like very depressed. I was playing league on my MacBook air with no mouse and then just I'm really good at taking tests. You were pulling. plane league on a MacBook Air

track pad. You're a piece of shit. It fits in a little envelope, made. It's in the commercial. Also, presumably Yumi. No, Yumi wasn't out yet. What? That, you're a, you're a fucking terrorist for doing that. I don't care.

That's crazy. A character comes out, you're like, I can do less. Dude, if my support is like, sorry, my MacBook's heating up right now. I'm FFing. I don't want to play with you. I play on my belly on my elbows Wait what the fuck is going on You're laying down forward

Oh like Rudolph played melee Yeah There's this Japanese guy who used to He'd lay on his on his stomach to play But even on stage At tournaments So he would set up a row of chairs From the venue like in a three chair set up

And then still lay down on the chairs to play on stage. He was a great player. And he was great. Yeah, they called him the Sphinx. He's from the famous picture. I don't know,

maybe you've seen it, the shirt. He loved that shirt, bro. The top of right image is like the big one. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah,

that's Rudolph. Everyone's seen this image, but no one knows where it's going. Is that mean viral? I love the Photoshop where it's me, you, and then you has advanced instead.

I'll never. Never forget. He came to a tournament I hosted once and he was staying at my house, He spoke zero English. Sleep standing up. But you studied Japanese in college, so you had rich conversations.

Barely helped. My roommate, by chance, was like, it was Japanese. His name was by chance? Fuck, I'm pissed. I didn't think of that one. That made me angry. It was right there in front of all this. I just ran the tournament.

I was awake for like 20 hours straight, and I got, I wake up at 4 a.m. after two hours of sleep getting shaken awake by Rudolph and he's like trying to explain to me something in Japanese and I'm like what's going on

like I have no idea what he's saying and he calls somebody on the phone to translate and he had missed his flight back home to Japan oh shit we had to book him a new one

but I'll never forget like being like nose to nose with Rudolph waking up and just having him yell Japanese me what I'm saying to just waking up the kid. Why Rudolph am I?

Get up. This is just a side note. One of my favorite things is watching, like, a white person talking to an Asian person who doesn't speak any English, and just saying, speaking English very slowly. Oh, yeah. I love it. Can you, can we? And a little more smiley. Yeah. Like, yeah,

America. Can we do a little improv? I, I will be an Asian man. Okay. It was 46 years old. And you are an American. teenager abroad and we're at a 7-Eleven okay and go

okay hi um do you guys have a toilet here oh do you have a toilet toilet bathroom a me go

pee pee and to protect myself I won't say anything you can all fill in the blank of what that would be like and see really bold character choices to be music yeah that's that's a pretty standard

I like the idea I talk to people who ostensibly don't understand English and also kids the same way which is the way I talk to everyone I use this like tone of like how's it going like you know whether you're four year old crass around children I'm not crass around children

I actually don't like swear. His mom was here yesterday and I didn't swear. And he was like, dude, you can say cunt. I don't know and say it. Ew. No, you can. And he made me say it in front of her. I saw the matrix. He made me say it to her.

And then he said it in front of his mother. That's crazy. No, I saw the matrix. This is what happened. I genuinely could never do them for my mom. So I was saying something very sweet about your lovely girlfriend. He was saying she was serving cunt. But what he said to my mother was serving C word. And I saw the, I saw the matrix.

I said, even if you said, cunt, she wouldn't know what that phrase means. So if you say serving C word, she's going to think that she's going to fill in cunt herself but not know what you're saying, which is exactly what happened. She said, her pussy came out. She basically said, why, was her dress really high? And I'm like, I would never say that about someone. So I jumped in to be like, no, he was saying serving cunt, that's a phrase. And it means this. I just saw all that I would. No, but what you immediately said when I said serving C word, she had a look on her face and then

you immediately were like, you can say I said you can say that to my phone. And I was like, Jesus, jeez! I couldn't. I couldn't. I wouldn't. I wouldn't. But also this is on slime. Now I agree that time is in the fault. What the fuck did I do? You brought up the you could have just said she looked ravishing. I wanted to use her. I feel like that

would be a cunt. It's so aggressive. Yuck. I'm so much of laugh. Yuck. Yeah. So, so, so who's the He's a fucking evil fucker now. He's an ear fucking... It's always you, Bell.

It's owes you. His mom shouldn't even be around here. What? What? Tell her that. Yeah, it's probably, it's his mom's fault. That's what you're saying. Thank you. No, she's sweet.

She's trying to farm us all for baby pictures. She was 20-20. Paris. The mom didn't cause the Paris bomb. You started a forest fire. She bombed Paris. That's crazy family. It's the forest fire lord.

No, it's like a joke. It's like a joke. It's not an inside joke. Nick dead ass. If we were playing countersh, like, among us or something, it was like in the game. I don't remember among counter news. Nick Frichillo of, of, um,

nah. You're Belinda. Like, nah, though. Like, nah, though. Right? Dead ass burned out of porous. Because the details are murky. We keep them that way.

We think, allegedly. The, no. It might have done it. How old do you think I am? I think we talked about this. 33? Ah, when we talked about it, I probably was. Okay.

Now I'm 35 And don't keep spinning Isn't that fucking crazy I think about All the time It's not that crazy But you're gonna be 40 in five years That's isn't that like Your prime

Oh for me yeah Absolutely yes yes Thank you yes We think he's gonna learn to dunk By 40 Yeah I believe Why are you laughing

I'm just enthused I'm happy I'm so happy for You didn't think a white boy can do something like that But I can Eventually one day I'll dunk a basketball

Enough time in that I'll save you That's right, I'm 5.10 And I can do it. What do you think it would take for you to get really good at basketball? How many years or days if you think that of practice until you're like, you're going to the pickup games

where Aiden plays and you're kind of like, people are drafting you like first four. If I played basketball five days a week for an hour, I think I could, yeah, for a year, probably get to Aden's level. Oh my God, he's shaking. Really? It's too late for you. That's it.

So you start saying shit like that. People are going to start saying shit like that to you when you're 35. You're going to feel pretty bad. Dude, I posted a TikTok and the comments were pushing 40, by the way. Dude, they get so savage. And I'm 30.

I know. I know. I'm barely pushing. Yeah, I am closer to 40 than you are to zero, you know? They actually do say I'm closer to 40 than 20, which is true by a couple months. Oh my God, you are. So you're 25.

You're in this period of your life where you don't have to fucking care about anything. Me? Yeah, in terms of like, because if I were to ask you, what are your big goals right now? Oh, yeah. You would say, you probably have no aspirations or anything. Because that was the conversation we had a year ago, and I doubt things have changed. No, that's true.

I don't have any aspirations. Isn't that? I have actually put it back. And I'm saying that's sick. I enjoy that. I think I have less aspirations now. Hell, yeah. Why is that has the...

Because I think I'm growing more and more comfortable in my... Oh, the pressure, the pressure's going away. Yesterday, she's like, I'm giving up. I just say that. I'm giving up. Yeah, you know, a little depressed on me a-again-a-year-old. 25-year-old going, I'm giving on. I don't blame you.

I only have 70 years left, what am I going to do? Like, giving up in a good way. Like, I don't care anymore. Oh, like you're on Degaf mode. Just tell myself, I like how the depression feels. The depression is actually fucking awesome. Yeah, I like that. On her scar once said on melee commentary, Super Smash Bros.

Melee commentary. He said, death isn't scary. Death is our friend. And for one, it doesn't have to do with what we're talking about. But I never, I think about that like once a week, weirdly, is Bobby Scar saying death is our friend. And me being like, do I agree with that? And it's like, no, I don't want to die. Once a week is a lot.

I know. That's what happens in your 35. And he said it a long time. I know. He said it like 10 years ago. It's also funny because if you asked him, remember when you said that? He'd be like, I said that. Sometimes, though, you ask him.

She's like, no, I actually, I do remember. remember, and then the conversation gets crazy. Yeah. And then that conversation will be in the zeitgeist in your brain for a while. That's right. That's how Bobby Scar affects you. You do something most streamers, I think, don't. Me? Yeah. Which is what? You go on vacation. It was my

first time. That was it? The Maldives? Yeah, it was my first time. Oh, tight, though. Nobody does that. It was sick. I haven't streamed in 10 days. Oh, my God. Oh, my, are you afraid you're going to go live and just no one's going to be there? Oh, yeah. But like I said yesterday, I've given up. Who even gives this shit? I actually hope no one's there. That'll be awesome. You should start a podcast.

It'll hurt so good. That's the real giving up. What, podcast? You should start a podcast, yeah. That's good. I've always wanted to start a podcast. Well, you are a streamer, so you would start a podcast, and then three months, you would quit it, and then never talk about it again.

Yeah. Or you'd do a revamp. You'd be like, we were coming back, and it only, like, five months in. You kind of didn't leave. I've seen this. Oh, man, I won't name who it is, but someone messaged me, like, I'm starting podcast, bro, I'd love you have on, and I respect this person, but I've got love to be on. Let me tell you something, though.

I get this message a lot. I don't think you'll have this in a couple months. Yeah. It doesn't exist. It's just, I've seen it too many times. Would your co-hosts or co-host or no one be? I have no idea. I haven't thought about it.

That's why. On this gun to your head. You got to pick now. Gun to your head. Okay. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. And then you need a third historical figure.

Go. Oh, I was, I was thinking of a friend. No. Historical figure. First person. Yeah, I know. Right? Yeah.

We're on the same way. So it's you, extra Emily, Hitler. And a young Adolf Hitler. You're trying to convince him to stop. A podcast. Emily's like, come on. It's artist Hitler, buddy. Oh my God, it's a time machine podcast.

You go back in time. Sure some 7Bs. That's the weapon of choice to bring back to kill Hitler. But you kill him with the power of love. In banter. Yeah, and banter. Emily walking up to Hitler.

Adol! Adol! It's so good to see him. She stressed, like, 2B from Neurotomich. I have only walking up to my fist. Oh, my God. 80! Oh, my God.

I make he keep us a Fortnite emote now. If we saved him like that. That's right. See, anyone can be convinced of anything through podcasting. And that's what's beautiful about. That's where you should start one. Yeah, I should. On Deerid.

That's what I'm going to think about it. You not starting one kind of cause. the whole holocaust. Think about that shit. So now I'm thinking about how much you think about that weird you didn't start willing to fight. You kind of got to save your wrap here.

That does not help my Zionism allegations actually. Can I have You got those? I was aware. Yeah, I got those. That's tough. Guys, you know that Ludwig told me

if I rock climbed that I would get hurt and I told him that he was a dumb bastard. Yeah, and then you did get hurt. I got actually both my hurt both my shoulders. And you've never rock climbed again. And I'm a side sleeper. So it pretty much made sleeping impossible.

That was until my Helix sleep mattress. This is a real story because I took a sleep quiz and I needed a matter. The problem was that because I sleep in the bed with someone else, I would sleep on these. Depends which day of the week. Oh. Just kidding. Love you. I would sleep on evenly and then I'd wake up with a lot of shoulder pain.

So I took the sleep quiz and I got a mattress that was the right amount of firmness for both of us. And now I don't get my shoulder pain anymore. Wow. That's pretty dope. It kind of just fixed it for me. But if it didn't, you had a 100-night sleep trial and a limited lifetime warranty. Yep, and I could ship it back in pieces. I would chop it back in pieces.

I would chop it back in pieces. I wouldn't know how to fill it in the mailbox, so I'd probably chop it up. I don't know if Felix Sleep takes it back in the chop. They have a guy. He glues the bed. They have, they do so many good things, but I feel like that's maybe something we should highlighting the limited in the lifetime warranty. Limited lifetime.

All our lifetimes are limited if you really think about it. Well, look, if you want to take the sleep kids, if you want to fix your, uh, sleep like I did, you can go to helixleep.com slash the yard for 20% offsite wide. That's helix sleep.com slash the yard for 20% off site wide. And thanks to Helix for sponsoring this week's episode. It's funny to be like, yeah, I listened to a podcast and then I bought a match. I bought a bed. Isn't that crazy? And that could be a funny story for you and your co-workers. Hey, you could do that. It's in, we found it interesting.

I listened to the yard and I went to helix sleep.com slash the yard. Can you rank? Okay, in terms of vibes, rank your entire CSGO. team that you played with last night. From most fun to play with to least fun to play with, go. I think Squeaks was, well, okay, I always think Emily's fun to play with, but it's like, she's fun to laugh at. Mm. Which is...

Team Jester. Yes, team Jester, because she's just so lost all the time. But, like, if we're talking, like, actually fun to play with, Squeaks was calming a lot. Okay. While keeping it. You know why Squeaks was calming a lot? Because he switched to my setup where the mic worked. Yes, that's true.

I couldn't Mike because my mic didn't work. Let her go through the list. You don't know where you're at. I feel complaining probably puts you really high up. I already know it rock bottom. I think Emily's putting on a little bit of a show. She's like so good at piano. And I'm like, you could be good at Counterstrike.

Oh, she's really good at Mind Sweeper and Tetris. Oh, really? Really good. I was watching her just... I mean Tetris coaching from her. She is really fucking good. Yeah, but she's just bad at like shooters. She's about every other video game.

Yeah, like, she's better at like running. And I know, I would know. Because I'm also bad at running. Yeah. So it's weird. It's weird sometimes. Okay, keep going. So it squeaks is the goat.

He calms and he's nice to hang out with. Who else? Ludwig was fun in a different way. He was fun because he was communicating with a team. He was fun in like a let's have a fun conversation. Team energy. Or vibe. Piggy two.

Also, I am biased because I played more with Squeaks and Ludwig. Yeah, because Aiden left because he had to go. Yeah, he had to go. Yeah, yeah, he had to go. I'm with you I'm saying what you're saying He's just saying the words you're saying No you're right

And then uh So who's last I guess Well I need to go through the list Oh yeah And then it's Aiden Because he kept the vibes up You know nice tries But then he got mad but it was silent

Yeah He wasn't mad at us That's just like And it was fun to watch And Emily's at the bottom Because she's an Asian woman Oh Yeah

I don't like that You know it's funny I have the same reason But I'm just kidding It's bottom bitch theory. She holds the team up. She's the foundation. You know?

It's good. It's actually good to be on the bottom. Wow. No, you know what's actually really impressive? Emily was actually frustrated, but she, you couldn't tell. What? Yeah, she gets mad, bro. I've never seen her mad.

Because she's very competitive. But she wasn't mad at all. She was like, it's okay, guys. Of course, but you could tell like she was annoyed. She was like, Hmm, guys, I think I'm going to get off. I went downstairs and it was, it was Squeaks, Extra Emily and Fan Fan, and they were.

watching a YouTube video and it's like general trivia and it's like 20 people in a room and they ask a question it's like what's a smallest country on earth yeah and then the first person to get it is safe and they go to the next round and the last person to not answer is eliminated and so they're like playing as if they're in the room so you get like 20 chances you know in the first couple rounds but then you only get like answer a question like super fast and so and they're all playing along and squeaks is like he's like he's really crushing it and he's killing it yeah and then emily's chiming in and she's chiming in and she's getting a couple wrong and I see her fume she's

touching her fucking fist Squeaks is fucking pulling out like Magnolia Birch tree and she's sitting there like saying dumb shit like Willow She's playing She has an old school football helmet with one crossbar only

Yeah she's like pretending she's on her phone But secretly she's like Wait I laughed at that reference But I don't get it What does that mean? like what when you laugh at something that you don't get what is what's going on there like I just want to fit in okay when you feel like if you don't fit in that's bad well I just I just want to feel like I get I get it because I give courtesy laughs a lot and I think it's

actually a flaw I think I need to stop giving courtesy laughs and just let things sit because you have a bad courtesy laugh I don't think it's bad what I think a courtesy laugh is different than like a fit in laugh right the courtesy laugh is like you said something Something not very funny, but I want you to feel okay, so I'm gonna laugh as a courtesy and then like the fit-in laugh is like You actually are funny. I don't want the social pressure having not known what that meant So I'm gonna laugh so no one questions me Yeah, I guess if you don't laugh that a beacon is placed on you right and it's like everyone's laughing and you're just sitting there Yeah, now it's like what you don't get it? Yeah, you're the joke. The joke is the joke you're the joke now. Yeah, that's interesting

I, well, I think he says my courtesy laugh's bad. You have a bad, I know every time he courtesy lab, I know every time. Really? Yeah, yeah. No. It's so, you know. Okay. You know it too. We all know what he courtesy laugh. Yes, I know. Really? Yes, of course. I'm like, I don't feel like...

It is a bit of... It's instant and short-lived. I've seen it before. It's a bit of a Scooby-Doo laugh. Really? Yeah, bro. I like, I appreciate it. I take it. So, my courtesy laughs. It's social lubricate. It's good. And I'm never. I've never bit bad.

I never said, don't do that. Did I stop courtesy love? Oh, sir, welcome to the social contract. Like, it's... Should I stop courtesy laughing? No. What if Ed is an experiment? Oh, we stop a courtesy laugh.

And it's an experiment. Because I think you have to then make snap judgments of what's a laugh and a courtesy laugh. And sometimes you might just pull back a real laugh. I'm fast enough. Sometimes it's tough. I'm crazy. Why are you fucking laughing now? Is that a courtesy laugh?

You're fucking delusional. You're fucking delusional. You look like shit. I look good today. You don't look good. I look good. I look good today. I look good today.

Dude, you look like Jared Leto and fucking fight club. I look like Brad and Fight Club, bro. He thinks he looks like Brad Pitt and Fight Club. You look like, Jared Leto. Really? Mega Mined. That's what we're doing. These are all courtesy laughs, by the way.

These are all courtesy laughs, you fucking cock suckers. No, it's such a pretty lot of me. You couldn't help yourself. You couldn't help, yeah, I just didn't expect it. If you were drinking water and be everywhere. It would be all over, all right is awesome white shirt. You flood, right? This is what we're doing.

Your hair looks crazy in that thing, by the way. You look fucked up. Yeah, I know. One day I'm gonna look like Megamide too? No. One day? Do you think he's balding, Fan, Fan? No.

Really? I can't tell. Okay. Do you want bald? I don't know. They may. I feel like my hairline is kind of crazy. Like I have very,

Caroline. Really? Yeah. Very normal. Oh, I thought I had like, I have like bald spot. Yeah, you have bald spots. Yeah, yeah, and just like a massive forehead, like so big. But, like, the hair line's like immaculate.

Oh, okay. No, I can't really tell with hair if it's balding or not. Women bald on the top. Oh, Ludwig's style? No, like more than the middle part. Are you balding on the top? No, no, no, the Ludwig chart. Oh.

Oh. Yeah, see. Oh, my God. That's custom. I do have that, I think. Oh, my God. The cartoon that's balding is crying. Why did they do that?

more and more sad. Yeah, how do they do it that way? Oh my God. Why not have an empowering image where she's happy despite it? And then she turns into Ambessa. The male one just gets creepier. Like their facial pattern

gets more menacing. Yeah. Oh, you're talking about the male Norwood scale? Yeah. We don't see the facial. Well, I mean, let's look at the Norwood scale on the podcast. Yeah.

Yeah. His first one, he's like maugging us. The last one, he's like, he's following you to your car. It's the same picture. It's different vibe. That's what I'm saying. If that guy looks at me like that, I'm like, oh my God, hello, stranger.

There's the last guy that looks at me like that. HR. I'm like, no, no, sorry. I'm actually just have my card on me. It's like that meme with the lady in the office. The HR meme. Yeah, yeah, HR. Yeah.

Is bald the deal breaker for you? Bald? Yeah. No. Really? Yeah. Interesting. What are your deal breakers?

Biggest red flags. Biggest red flags. Deal breaker. What is a deal breaker? I can't think of any. I mean, in like a dating situation, what you would not at any point consider. I'll give you an example. I would be against personally and I'm not applying this to you.

Because obviously you have your own. But I would be against a pedophile. That's a deal breaker for me. Yeah, yeah. Well, I have to... I think I'll have to know more. Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay. I guess I'm just like more accepting than you. Yeah. You're, look at your fucking ego that you think a pedophile would be in you.

A pedophile wants nothing to do with you. You're fucking pedophil. Right. Yeah. You're so fucking chopped in all day. Pedophile was fucking dating. Yeah, man. Okay.

Whatever. It's mutual. So like a deal worker like that. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you have one? I have one. I feel like you're really don't care.

No, I feel like, like racist in a bad way, maybe. Would you date a white guy who tips the fedora? No. So there we go. Ironically, though. Is racist in a good way? Very ironically. Can you speak to racist in a good way?

Could you speak like, could you be, you said racist in a bad way? But could you be charmed by racist in a good way? Yes. Well, can you get an example? Funny racist. Okay, okay. So a guy comes up to you and says like a really funny racist thing. He says, I don't know, Aidan, do you agree an example?

Yeah, Aidan, can you roll out of him? Can you go ahead and just say some roll at X. Yeah. Yeah. You can make up a slur. Okay. Hey, you see that. Oh, I have a new slur. Oh, really? Let's hear it. D-cell. D-cell. D-cell. What is that? Because people got mad at me for saying the R one. Okay. What is the D?

D-celled. Like, decelerated. Oh. Decella or D-celled. Wow. Yeah, that could be used enough to where it becomes a real slur. Yeah, I guess the language that we'd have to accept it. Because right now, we're saying it freely without consequence. Yeah. And then they look back on the yard, like when we're on like a Delta flight. slur. They're going to be like, wow, they're saying they're saying the D slur. This is like season one of the office when Michael says

crazy shit. Michael's ripping it. He says the F slur. Jackie Chan also says it. Yeah, really? That's fine. He could say it. He knows martial arts. He knows no martial arts. You know what Bruce Lee was saying? Huh? It's insane.

Still like a D, no. That's Muhammad Ali. Oh. Really? Who did you? think it was. I was thinking of the other Asian guy. Well, Muhammad is not. We're really lost

in this right now. Bruce. Bruce Lee. Bruce Lee. Right. Okay. That's who I said initially. There's Bruce Lee, there's Jet Lee, and there's comedian Dat Fan. And that's the Triumvirate. That fan is not part of the Triumvirate. Why not? Because a different category.

The trivaryand should be martial artists. He doesn't have to be martial arts. He's a funny guy. But Bruce Lee's not a funny guy, so why is he in the triumvirate? Bruce Lee can be funny. Bruce is a very funny guy. He practiced 1,000 kicks. He punched Chuck Norris in the chest.

That's like one of the funniest things you could do. And Jetley's in there because he's funny? Jetley was in the one, which is a hilarious movie. Yeah, I've seen the one. So it's just three comedians if you think about it. It just feels like a weird turnaround, I guess. I don't know. Yeah, it's weird to guys like you.

Yeah. Also, comedy is a martial art. Real shit. You could use comedy to disarm any sort of anyone. That's right. And you should only use it when attacked. Or a hot pot of coffee if you're in a 7-Eleven to stop the person from robbing.

The perp. The perp. I stopped the pert. Which one of us, and this is a true thing, one of us on this podcast hates dogs, which one do you think it would be? I first thought would be you, but I don't think that's true.

Okay. Interesting. Can you explain your answer? Like an asshole, huh? Probably his vibes. On the way here, Ludwood was explaining, like, each of you, he said, Aiden's the nice one.

Slime's the mean one. Me? Kill yourself! Yeah. Anyway, go ahead. And then Nick's just right, I guess, right? You said he was the porridge, the baby's porridge? I'm baby porridge.

He's just right. Wait, hold on, hold on. Back up, back up. Yeah, right. So I need you to explain why that's just right for you. Because too nice, gotta love dogs, too mean, too, like, too expected. Just right. It's Aiden.

She used the test to take the test. It is Aiden. It was the least expected, then. I beat up the dogs. Oh. Aiden once said... Aiden once held an M1911. Is he going to tell him?

He once held a military issue handgun to a dog's head and said, you dare me? You dare me? To the dog. And then the dog didn't say anything back, so I spoke slower. No, I'm going to shoot. Yeah, so it was Aiden. You would find that surprising. I would, because he's a nice guy otherwise, but he has contempt.

Something is hard for animals. Hatred. It's kind of interesting. Only dogs? Are all animals? Hmm. Just dogs. Just dogs.

I think it would be fine with like if somebody rolled up to like AMC with like their pet rat or like they're like an anteater. I'd be enthralled. Enthrothal. Their rat or their anteater? Yeah, just one of those two. One of them is crazy. And one of them's like equally enthralled. Really.

Equally. Okay. Because I love all other animals equally. except for the dogs. Interesting. I think that's fair. I think it's fair that he feels this way and I won't pull it from him.

That's crazy, man. Hassan didn't go far enough. You did have a funny tweet after stream rewards. You like that one? God, I had crazy people. Dude, I tweeted about Expedition 33. Hassan replies just talking about the game

and all of a sudden it's just millions of people in his replies arguing with each other about shit that has nothing to do with XS. He's just started. He's just got.

frame one tweeters. He's got frame one tweeters. It is so unbelievable. It's like the people that defend him and the people that hate him. They're all on frame one. He moves her on Twitter with the green stink line. He does. And I just and I replied in this long thread. It was like 19 people telling each other kill themselves. I'm like you guys all need to get off the fucking internet. You got to stop. You got to stop. You got to stop. You guys all right. You got to stop. You guys. I blocked every single one of them. And yeah. And I bought in some were bots and I said you guys got to stop. You got to stop. The bots are like, all right. Fine. You fucking got me, bro. He's like a monkey bomb and Nazi zombies. He's, it's exactly like that. Because the replies are... He's just like this? The repos are... All these Nazis are chasing him down.

Snarling Nazis. It's just, it's like seven replies of like an edited Charlie Kirk Mario Kart picture using the lightning bolt at a dog. And they've been posted within five seconds of him tweeting about something totally unrelated. and they're all ready to go at any given time. Yeah, there's a folder on these desktops that they're locked and loaded. Kind of beautiful, the devotion in a way.

I got Charlie Kirkified on our subreddit. Oh. Yeah, I thought it was funny. Can I see a zipper? I haven't seen it. Please, yeah, because it's like he's kind of bald. Yeah, he's got short. Well, no, no, like when they did it to me,

it looked kind of like Drusky in that sketch he did. Yeah. He's like, he's balding on top. We're going to get to a certain year where you can say that about anything. Yeah, he's covering everything. Like, oh, it looks like Drewski in that sketch. That'll cover all scenarios at some point. Yeah, he's pulling off the cosmic library.

He's working on Drusky AI. And it's Sora, but everything's Drusky. Does he so do that show? What is, uh, or like the American Idol type thing? Yeah, yeah. Wait, American Idol type thing. Oh, the talent show thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's cool, man. Could have been records. Oh, I forgot. He was fucking. He was on tour for could have been records. Yeah, but he was in that day. People hated it. He was in the,

The baby oil mansion. Baby oil mansion? He was in the baby oil mansion. He was in the baby oil mansion? We was in the daddy. We was in? The ditty. Riffraff was way before this.

And in his Nard war interview, he said, I don't know any of this. He was talking about his big, like, invention idea, and it was baby oil water park. Yeah, Diddy got there already. And Diddy was wet. Yeah. It's rare that riffraff gets beat to the punch of creativity.

Did he had a killer whale that could breathe the baby oil, and they would all, like, watch it jump out and it clap and shit. And right before the arrest, it was going down to Riyadh, it got fucking canned. It canned literally, like tuna. It's true. And that's why I went with Beaseland. This is the lore. Mr. Beast's baby old beast.

That is crazy. I wouldn't look fucking crazy. I wouldn't recognize Charlie Kirk. It looks so good. It does look really good. Except for the top of the head. It looks like my head when I was bald. Can Phan, when is your Riyadh theme park opening up?

What would be? What would it be? What would Fan Fan Land look like? Oh. FanFan 0% Vap Adventure. Zero percent vape adventure. Everyone gets to vape at the front door. But it's 0%

And it's also a fast pass. Ooh, dude, check it out. It's Fan Fan Land, you walk in. You got two geek bars taped to your hands. You can't leave till you finish. And at midnight, we're shooting everybody. We're shooting you in the fucking head, boy. Wait, wait, wait.

Better be 0% battery. You can't get sucking. What's your, you walk me through a day at a theme park with Fanfan. Are you a rides? Are you an arcade? I'm a ride. Food. You like rides. Yeah. So what kind of rides? Like fast ones. Like big.

Yeah, big ones. You get a funnel cake? Do you get fried dough? Yes, I like rides. And then if I get thirsty and hungry, I go get a snack, like a sweet treat. Okay. And then I go back on the rides. Do you throw up on the rides? No, never. She screams, though. I do scream.

We went on a credit coaster. He lied. Yeah. And like there's no... Yeah. Yeah, like there's no reason for him to lie. It was fun. It was fun.

I lied like she was a child. Yeah. She was like a chill ride. We went on in Credit Coaster and I was like, I was like, this ride gets kind of crazy, but it starts out slow. And in Credit Coaster, it goes like... The entire thing is that it starts crazy fast. Yeah. And like I believed it because like that's normal.

Yeah. And why would he lie? Why would you lie? I guess this is fine because you like rides. I do. It was awesome. See, if I didn't like rides. If he did to me, I would get off the ride. I would get off the ride like I'm never going on a ride again

You ruined it for me This is what happens to children I think is adults lie to the child And the child who had a like apprehensiveness towards the ride Is betrayed and doesn't like ride ever again This is what happened to cutie. She hates rides Oh yeah because she was lying to. She hates rides? You don't know this one? She was lied to? She goes to Disneyland fucking four times a week

She hates the vibe, the energy She likes to enter When she gets to Disney bro she hops on like the three year old Goofy Sky coaster and goes That's scary And then gets off And she's like Ah, I'm good on the swings

Wow Like everything else Tap out Worst ride at Disneyland Is the one Where you're just in a Honda And you're just driving Or a toilet

We waited 45 minutes for that And it shut down No no no that's a different one Oh okay, never mind Cars is good Ortopia Autopia And you're just literally in a car

No yeah It's two people per car This one's actually not that I think you're all Huh? Because you actually do drive it You barely You barely drive it dude

I had a better time in the parking structure before. So you drive to Anaheim so you can get on the ride where you get at a worse car? It's pretty ridiculous. You guys are talking like this is it. What if they're just bumper cars except no one can fucking hit each other? This is the worst ride. It's stuck in four or five traffic to then get stuck in traffic. Classic LA fucks.

You sound like northern life. You're trying to belittle what I said, but that's exactly what this is. Dude, it's exactly what this is. is it's a seven-year-old who's driving. Yeah, but we're talking, we're adults. Not with me. Not with me. I'm taking the fucking driver seat.

The problem is I'm a man. I'm grown-ass man and I'm like, oh, this looks, everyone's waiting. This must be fun and I got fooled. I'll never go on it again, but the fact that I went on the first time, I feel betrayed by the mouse. There are rides for adults

and there are rides for children. Can I be really? You went on a ride for children and said, why is it on your adults? Yeah, but I didn't know because there were adults there who are fucking wearing the Mickey Mouse ears and they're insane. I've never been to Disneyland,

but I've been on a ride like that in my childhood and I hated it because I hated that you couldn't actually drive the car. You can drive it. No, you're lying again. You're on a track where you can control left or right to break. It's not. Gas. Okay. Left right, break. Go to Disneyland.

Tell Ludwig how wrong he is because I swear to Jesus Christ, here's the thing. You're the thing. If you don't so much more than you don't steer at all, you still get to the end. It'll like clang on the railing and then you'll like... Yeah, man.

Oh, so this makes it a good ride. Well, you're driving poorly. Like, you're driving poorly? Like, that's on you at that point, no? Talk about driving poorly. Ben, Fah, you ever been to the P&E? No, what's that? In Vancouver?

Oh, yes, long time ago. What is this? I remember LAND. It's like Playland. It's Vancouver Amusement Park. It's like a big fairground where they have like an amusement park kind of. They got hog shit and yeah.

Yeah. There's a bunch of... A hog shit and fucking penis in Vancouver, fucking island. So why do you think he's mad, right? That's what they got there. They have fucking hog shit and fucking He's upset that.

I don't know, right? Wait. Kiss y'all, sis y'all booze in Vancouver. If Aiden's a nice one and slime's a mean one, what is Ludwig? Great question. What do you think?

Oh, no, he calls himself the famous one. Honestly, yeah. Yeah, that's accurate. That's why. You can lie, but that's fine. Barrety, gladiatae. Why are you so pissing me?

What did I do in front of our fucking awesome guest? I'm not even mad at you anymore. I'm not even fucking mad at you anymore. If you had to kill one of us, who you fucking kill? I can't kill right now. Myself, dude. No, you can't pick yourself.

You can't pick yourself. The gun doesn't fire. All of us? You can't kill all of us. You can't kill all of us. You got to shoot one of us in the skull. Fuck, I get you one of us, dude. What do we?

Yes! No, no, I'm testing my feelings. Yeah, she's feeling you know. That's a great way to do this. Wow. I think it's got to be Nick again. He's just right. Yeah, yeah.

Just right. Great. Good answer. Good answer. What the hell? Because he's like he's not too happy, he's not too sad. Right before you kill me, I come out of the closet. Oh, my God.

Oh, more of a recent. Oh, I'm keeping my mouth shut. Makes it easier. Aiden, if you didn't know, is wearing Balenciaga socks. Yeah. Oh, I see that. Yeah, it's pretty nice. And I hid that from my parents for a long time.

He was 18, he hid that from his own. He was 18. If you didn't know that, now you know it. If you're disclosed, you don't be afraid. Don't be afraid we have him trained So he cannot hurt you Princess down Thank goodness

I'm sorry I'm sorry He's actually never like this I met some fans That sandwich up and grandmas Okay Come up to me They go

We were just listening to the yard We're the biggest yard fans I love quizzing him When they say some dumb shit I never quiz I instantly just go Who would you kill That's a good also

is a quiz essentially but yeah and it was frame one what like it was the next like it was like they were ready for me to ask it I mean that means like I mean it's not Ludwig who'd you kid oh oh heyden I would kill aiden were you there you covered your hood your face like you knew this was coming because I was with Connor and Connor told him about it yeah they frame one day didn't and and I was this is what Connor walked in the room it was like you know what I just found out I I found out that I'm the only person in your life who's nice to you. And I was like, thank you

for saying it. Thank you for fucking acknowledging it, Conrad. See, dog? Yeah. Yeah, dude, I help you grow. Is it, it's insane that you don't acknowledge it. We push you to greater heights. Sorry, he pulls you down to nice hell. He pulls you down to nice little hell. If we weren't around, everyone might be nice to you.

Do you realize that? Do you realize that life would be miserable if everyone was nice to you? You would never know when you were making mistake. Isn't that a version of hell? Don't take your shoes off. He's going to take his shoes off. Don't take your shoes off. Don't take your shoes off. It's okay. Don't take your shoes off.

Oh, wait a young man. I need you to be really still or he's going to get scared, okay? Do you know why they picked him, though? Uh, bisexual. Yeah. No. Definitely not.

Because he's leaving, and it hurts them. L.S. Oh. That's right, bitch. Because of his political views. That's right. He has a right wing podcast. He has another podcast.

Oh, you just. Cheat. You ever see that podcast clip where they go. You like sniz. It's, that's his podcast. You can't say that. Oh. That's his podcast.

I feel like that's a slur. I feel like that's a slur. Well, I can't talk about snooze it. Dude, stop, bro. So you put so much stank on it. You're saying the sea word, which I would never say. Why does that make us uncomfortable and what I said was awesome? Why, dude?

Think about that. Because you guys are freaking in touch. with women, I guess. Really? Yes. Pan, fan. Which one of us do you think is most in touch with the female experience?

Okay. I'll think that. I might be dead. Yeah, I went down with the honor. We'll say in the eulogy, he was in touch with women. He actually gets painted as a resident misogynist, which is Oh, he does?

It's one of those running jokes. And lesbian. I don't know how I got both. Self-hating. Oh, interesting. Self-hating. You, am I? You started strange.

dreaming during COVID. So presumably you go, you like graduate and then you go full time after? Like did you not, did you not start a job like a normal job? No, I had jobs during school. Okay. And then because it stopped. I had an internship at a like a research place for breast cancer. Oh my God. Oh, my God. Ah, yeah. Waste of my fucking time. Shit made up for 500. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. After war. Okay. I'm making fixes all this. And then I had another job

Like translating documents from Chinese to English Oof, I would love that job I hate you so much I would love that job Wait, okay, hold on 2020? No, it was like 2019 Can't we?

Surely the computers are better than that Better at that than us, right? Translating Chinese, you're crazy You're insane, you're bat shit I am? Humans are better at translating Chinese than Way better.

I think humans are better at translating language in general because I understand the nuances of it. Way better, dude. Whoa. What about AI? AI is also worse. AIs also worse. Like, what about grok? Yeah, oh, yeah.

Yeah, I'm better at grok than what? You're better at grok. Okay. So you're a fucking language problem. I know you're meming, but Cam was making the video for France and he wanted to translate a lot of the video. And he wasn't asking me. He shouldn't have asked you because every text would have been, I fuck my sister out. Yeah, I'm going to drive this car to me.

It sounds weird. I know what it sounds like. He's talking about these fucking new sisters. It came in this everything. It's like, I know. He's saying something about his... I know it sounds crazy.

He said he brought it. He sent my name is Jack. So anyway, he's doing a lot of translation with AI. And I was like, just hit me up for the translation. Like, I speak French. And then I was looking over the video. And it's like commentators. And it's like,

They're like, we're in for a bit. And I'll just translate it at how Cam did it. It's like, we're in for a big race today. Huge. They're driving 87.634 kilometers around the track. And I was like, Camp, do you really think they dropped decimals? Like, do you think the commentators were sitting there? And they said 87.36.

You think that's what happened. Right. And he's like, yeah. It's like, no. No, they just got it all wrong. No, I've just seen the Instagram reels where they have like the auto AI translation. Yeah. It translates the audio.

And it's always some freaky weird shit. It just goes like, oh. Okay, so I actually found a really weird video this week where I've been watching furious Counter Strike content and they're a Brazilian team. But the whole team isn't Brazilian right now. So they'll interview the Brazilian players and then the Portuguese audio populates with English audio

because of this feature they added, right? But then they pin over to their guy from Kazakhstan who they talk to in English. The dub just goes mute. and you just don't hear anything. So he's just saying nothing. Because it doesn't know what to do when it hears English,

when it thinks it's supposed to be translating Portuguese. Speaking Portuguese poorly. So it just went silent for 15 seconds. I was like, oh, this is a great feature. I'm glad AI could figure this out. Until they shipped this one out. Doing this. Yeah, that was the big issue too.

Like, when we released Ethermanter, because it's a really popular game in China, but some of the translations weren't like that accurate or that like solid in Chinese so they got you on the case yes so we said we need it after I fixed it but initially got review upon before I clean things up

dude do you like now that you're doing this and you're 25 are you it's almost over are you are you happy are you happy doing what you do do you have an idea of like oh I want to

doing this like 10 years from now or yeah I'd like to stream for like three more years be done three more years and be done probably that's clean maybe five more years ahead do you think realistically who okay that's clean that's clean it's very clean it's a clean number yeah okay good so right now it's like I'll do this I'll do this for the next two years for sure yeah nice 50 and let's say you're not in the picture in 12 would you want to just get a normal job after or just be like I don't want to work again I want to be a therapist oh hmm and I want to open a dog shelter. I better help therapists. Whoa. Which he would fucking hate. Yeah. Oh my god.

I want you shelter shelter from me. Maybe. I actually didn't want it open a dog shelter until I found out about Aiden. Oh my God, yeah. So I inspire people. A dog shelter, but you have like a clock and you go, guys, if you don't adopt it, Aiden comes in and he's going to talk to him slowly. You know those

rage rooms where they let you break every night at 9 p.m. The kennel turns into a rage room very total palm or any by the tail. It's like, you gotta dump the dog by then. He just, he comes by every night. He was like, we're gonna pass.

You show him the video of Aden last year. He loves this shit. I'm sure. He loves this. This is a perfect dog for him. So you stop streaming and you have some sort of indescript amount of money and then you open a dog shelter

and you become a therapist. Yeah. A dog therapist. Well, you have to go back to school, right? Yeah. You go back to school. Would you want to do that too? Yeah.

Oh my God. What was the idea? behind biochem where you're gonna try to be like a fucking crazy scientist? fucking crazy fucking scientists. I mean I'm I am Asian. Okay. You keep saying shit like that but like I fucking play Sudoku and was an English major. So you're born a crazy scientist? No. I was I was I was trying to understand. Oh it's true. I was gonna say. Okay. Yeah. Makes sense. I gave up on premed the first semester though. Because it was too hard. Yeah. Yeah it's hard. I got 40% on my first exam.

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It's so nice because everybody thought they were contributing to something to save the monkeys and they'll be employed. They'll be competing against one another. Well, they'll be saved through the spirit of competition. But with their lives on the line. Oh, their lives are on the line. Anyway, thank you for sponsoring this episode. Let's get back to the episode with FanFan who is, I'm sure saying something very appropriate right now. Favorite vape flavor?

Coca-Cola. Whoa. Do you like the soda too? Yes. Do you drink the soda a lot? Yes. Do you have it at home? Yes.

Do you like it more than Coke Zero? No, Coke Zero is the one. No, because I... Yeah, is the one. Do you pour it into a glass with ice or do you drink from the can? From the can. Is the can cold? Yes.

Out of the fridge cold or out of like a cooler at a soccer game cold? Bridge. Oh my God. This is all important. Oh my God. You're going to hell. Really? You're going to burn for a turning.

Which one was bad? Where are we starting? Honey. Honey. Girl. Biochem. Yeah, hi, my name's fan for the slide, maybe? It's the earliest.

Wait, can I talk about the slide? It is really narrow. It's a kid slide. Like, yeah. It hurt high. Well, for one, they don't make adult slides. Oh, okay. It's just slides or kids slides.

But I just sat here in pain in the beginning and pretended like I wasn't. It hurt that bad? Yes. That's crazy. I would have barked. I would have said some shit. I would have sued the shit out of Aiden specifically. Yeah.

Coke Zero. What's wrong with? What the fuck is your problem? I will say I drink Coke Zero because it makes me feel like I'm dieting. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because you're afraid Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you don't drink Diet Coke? No, it tastes different. Nick's crazy by the way. It does save different. I like Diet Coke with sugar. Good, of course. It's Coke. It tastes great. I know, but it's like

it's not, it's like Diet Coke or Coke Zero is like 95% is good and you don't get 45 grams of sugar. Yeah, but I'm not drinking Coke at home. It's a little treats. It's a little treat. A Coke's you every day at home or a Coke at a restaurant every once in a while. Guy who said last week that listening to music counts for screen time. That's insane. It does. Yeah, that's insane. It's fucking insane. What's your screen time? Can we see? Yeah. Or can you just tell us? Well, I don't know. I will check. Wait, what? Check it. Wait. Sudoku iPhone check.

iPhone check. Last week, my Sudoku time was 18 hours in that week. Oh, it's actually a new one. I thought it was like iPhone 4. 18 hours of Sudoku in one week? A 15, I think. I was on a crossword kick for. a while and I did it for hours like every night. Christian too. Christian really? That boy loves a crossword. We'd have a lot to talk about. You guys would crush it.

I want six and a half hours. Wait, let me say. Pass, pass, pass, pass, pass, pass. Pass, pass. You remember. I don't know how to check the details. All right, last week we averaged 11 hours. Bro.

I was on vacation and I was traveling for 44 hours straight. You know, I'm going to go to a more regular week because I think last week was an anomaly. Okay. Yes. The week before, okay. go to another week. Oh, my God. Seven hours. To be fair, the past month, I've been, I've had my phone open all the time. Messages? Huh? No, it's not. You're messaging crazy. Yeah. 24 hours.

Yo, our friends. Oh, I leave it open. I leave it open. Okay, okay. Then X the everything app, then Discord. There's no even freaking, you weren't a big on Sudoku. Who the hell is this? I can read it, but can you read it? That's my brother. Okay. Because that's what I thought that said. It was difficult for me to read. It says, it's a Chinese name. what is it what is Ludwig's Chinese name what would it be you're the pick

you're the pick you can choose oh I can choose no no she can choose and Ludwig will be your dead name I want him to choose I would love to choose

what would I choose for my name I would go with this game is so hard Air Fong what oh she made a face

she hasn't made the whole time were you attempting Air Coo Yeah, I thought it was gonna... Did I get it right? Yeah, so you are actually a fucking idiot. Did I get it? No, you didn't get it, bro. Swing and a miss.

I don't know how people come up to Chinese names. You're like Andy Pa is that bad. I've tried to call him Big Penguin. Big Penguin. I like Big Penguin. Oh, wait, how do you say fat again? Phi. Pung.

Oh, Faye. That one? Yeah. What's the difference? Same thing. Same thing? is shabby. So I would call myself

Air pong. Air pong. Yeah, what do you think about that? Good. Air fat? No, air is two. Too fat. Yeah.

Too fat. Yeah, it's, yes. How would you say two Hollis? Two what? Air Hollis. Any other questions, idiot. I guess I'm just, what's going on in Vancouver?

Is it just like you, Northern Ireland and train, like hanging out every night? Yeah. Are you in train, spin it up? Yeah. I figured it's, do you just need a three? No. Well, on occasion.

Online? No, no, no, no. Fan fan. Why don't you just rip open a steak account, fucking get a penthouse, and live the fucking good life? You would be a dope gambling streamer. Yeah. Thank you.

Ripping the pen. You would cry. You would hit like 100K and cry. I do get really excited gambling. It'd be awesome. You should do a stream where you put like $100 on red and then it misses and you should cry for 30 minutes. And then don't go live again for like a week Yeah, yeah, yeah, and then no, I really like blackjack. I love blackjack. Yeah, I just I love it. Are you skilled, do you think? I know the book. Let's say you're you have 13 in dealer shows a four. What do you do?

And, okay, of course, stand. Okay, you have 12 in dealer shows three, what do you do? Stand, right? No, that one's fine. Is that? If you're, if you're like details in, and if you're, if you're, if you're like details in. If you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, Out of two, it's a 50-50. The dealer is showing a six, and you have 16. Ooh. What do you do? I personally would stand because I'm a pussy. You'd stand?

I would stand because I'm a pussy, but you should hit. So you always stand then. If you have $1,000 on that hand, you start... I'm okay with either answer. I'm okay with either answer. I just hate the people who change it up every time. Oh, no, I want the consistency. Who are you?

No, I like changing it up because it's like you're feeling the vibe, right? No, sometimes I'm like, I'm going to go and then I lose. I think that's okay. if no one else at the table. If you vibe it and then you hit and then it fucks me? I think I've gambled enough money at a blackjack table

to where I can do what I want. I'm allowed to do whatever I want at the blackjack table. Gamble with him is so crazy. I'm a massive like people pleaser pick me like validation whore. So at a black to table I'm usually like is that is this okay?

Is it okay if I hit on this 20? And then I just listen. My first hand I'm splitting I'm splitting 10 10. intense. Must be intense. I'm going, welcome to the table, boys. Yeah, I agree. So my philosophy is, I can do what I

want when I want, so can anyone else. Because sometimes people will be like, is it cool if I get fucking, they'll do that. Yeah. Is it cool if I do something crazy? I'm like, it's your life, man. Live your dream. Because it doesn't matter, right? You can get crazy, I'm going to freak out, though. And if I got 10K on my hand and they fuck it up, I will look

at them. And I just want them to say sorry. Cool, man, get crazy. My wife left me today, so. So I don't have any fucking control. What happens in my life? I can tell you what to do Yeah If I told you not to do it

You'd probably fucking do it twice I don't know God I want to go to Vegas so badly You ask the girl Who gives you drinks for a gun Yeah Do I need anything? Yeah

You'll bring it to me You'll be the in-sell gambler That'd be such a sick YouTube channel It's just an in-sell guy Who's a sad sack piece of shit He gambles hundreds of thousands of dollars But he's just a miserable break He's getting the massage, and he's, like, covering his lap.

He's been leaning forward at the table. Yeah, I might go to Vegas on New Year's. Vegas some broke shit, bro. Don't want to go to Vegas on New Year? What are you talking about? Fuck Vegas, bro. Put all your money in prediction markets, bro. No, I'm an old school guy, man.

I don't need to use call sheet to bet on whether or not Aiden will scratch his ass at the Counterstrike setup. That's what you do, bro. You submit it in, right? I got streaking at CS major. major okay that's so 10 to one odds I've paid a guy a thousand bucks to do it sure this Karzik standing kid he's coming up and he's got it all hanging out yeah he's uncut oh my god we need to ask the am I cut or uncut yeah we ask everyone on the show

would be probably uncut hell yeah would be that's interesting we should ask women what they what they would choose you know I would if I were a woman I'd probably say the same thing because like you have the choice right yeah I'd be like doc hand me the clippers when you're saying I would be are you saying it because it's your choice or that you think that's what your family would do I think that would be my choice mm that's cool well because I think it would be easier for me to jack off welcome to the right side of history lotion yeah I guess it is yeah well you you estimated all of this properly and you are a great call I'm still going cry science that's the thing

I don't get skin or not I'm still going cry I'm still going cry after I'm hitting I'm hitting reels in seconds like I'm going back to YouTube Yeah, you go right back to the reels. Just like... And you close the window, too. You're just like, like, frame one. It's like the fastest you do, ain't it. Window got to be open.

When we got to be open. That's how we do it, don't we? You guys get like phantom pains? In what? You're talking like... A maze missing their arm. No, no, no, like... Because I get like penis phantom pains.

You do? Yeah. What? Can you describe what you're talking about? Like, you're saying... No, no, no, no. I'm talking about, like, imagining like... Not like, oh, what... One time I zipped my zipper onto my foreskin and a hurt, I'd be like, like, I can

follow them. But you're saying the other way around? Like, do I imagine having a deriard and then being like, oh, yeah, my type of empathy, probably. Yeah, I think, like, like, I feel like I feel the female experience, like, day to day. I'm with you on that. And I feel like period cramps and I'm like, not that bad. It's like, I start to speak and it's like I imagine what it'd be like to speak over a woman.

I'm like, I can't even say anything. Doesn't words even come out? Right. You know what I mean? He's really chokes you up. I'm like... Yeah, I get mad of my coworkers out of nowhere. Oh, guys.

Guys, look at this baby. Not that bad. This is... This was equivalent to getting hit in the balls, maybe. And you see, like, concealer and you like, you start salivating. And you're like, it would taste pretty good, I think. This would taste yummy, bro. Why does the makeup also look like it tastes good?

Why does it look yummy? Is makeup delicious to eat? Are you asking me? Yes. I don't... What? I've never eaten makeup. Oh, yeah. That's fine.

Wait, really? Let it out, but just tell us what we're going to fucking like it tastes awesome. Like it looks fucking good. It looks like cocoa dust sometimes. It's like...

They should have the Sephora like checkout aisle where it's just like all this awesome shit at Chipotle. And you're like when you're in the last... Put it on a burrito. No, no, no. When you're in the last part, you can also buy like a copy of like Exhibition 33 for PlayStation 5

and they have key chains and little like gadgets and Bisk off cookies and I love Biscop cookies Delta Flyer based yeah actually they do have

yummy lip gloss sometimes I will say They do have a cherry What was that the famous one back in the day They're like sparkly chapsticks

And they were all flavored You know I'm talking about Like all of them No but they're like It's like a specific All them You know I'm type in like Type in like early 2000s

Flavored chapstick It'll be the only one that comes up Oh early 2000s I wasn't wearing makeup Because I was an infant We all kind of You were Born in the year 2000.

Yeah. That's crazy. Literally. I have never seen these. I've seen baby lips. That was my little school. That one's right there. You're on it.

No, Lipsmacker. Oh, I do know these. Classic. Lipsmacker. Classic. Why do you know about this? You're a boy.

Yeah, you're boy. Because all the girls I'd fucking make out with. It looks like fruit stripes. It looks like the same vibe. Same guy. Yeah, I could see the zebra prancing around on those labels for sure.

Super, look up early 2000s disasters. Okay. 9-11. Oh, he typed in 200s, too. Oh, shit. Not on my watch. You would have stopped it. Not on my watch.

What was your favorite one? Early 2000s disasters. I think mine was probably the BP oil spill. Oh, remember the BP oil spill. And then we got all these dove commercials or not dove. Glad, no. It was dove. Dawn.

It was Don. About cleaning ducks. Oh, I remember. remember that. There's a massive campaign to clean all the duckies because there's oil on them. And then after the commercial

was finished rolling like filming, they just threw it against the wall. It threw the duck against the fucking wall and actually got more oil off. It's hard to think. Yeah. That's true.

That's true. Yeah, they claim Kershaw who was professionally hired to chuck them against the wall. Yeah. Yeah. Early 2000s were rough. It was a dark.

It was a bush years. A lot of regulations went down. And then Obama made it a pain in the ass To throw the ducks against the wall As hard as you fucking can Like without letting go though And then he'd like Napoleon Dynamite came out And now we got a fucking

That's how they found out of Foggeron So early enough Early enough bro Now we got a fucking peanut winning VTuber the year Bro And I'll give that bro How do you guys feel about peanut winning YouTube of V2?

It fucking pisses me off bro It makes me fucking really question Who that is I don't fucking care I think everyone who cares You fucking I don't care Being a digital peanut is not V-tubing? Send me to ADX 4-inch with Al-Copo.

And me as the officer? Shackled, shackled, shackled, shackled. Fucking take me in. I'm taking all three of you. I would take all three of you in. And I'd make you the front of the train and you the fucking back. Wait, what about me? Oh my God.

I wouldn't put you in the human centipede out of respect. You can't put girls in the centipede. I will be taken away as well. Yeah, but you just be shot dead. I just don't want to be left out. Yep. I got you. Shot dead.

Me too. That's got to be the definition of V2. No, that's what I'm saying. Are you kidding me? He's a picture. He's a fucking picture, bro. He's virtual. Isn't that not the dream?

This kind of the V2 being dreamed. Wait, hold up. I would argue he's hybrid. Hybrid what? It's his eyes and his mouth. It's his real eyes and mouth. So what? It's not virtual.

If you put real eyes and real mouth on this gorgeous, with an anime model with jiggle physics. Boom, boom, boom! That is a V-tuber, bro. You gunned down all... Is this all in one person? Man, all those V-tubers got fucking swastick arm bands anyway, bro.

Yeah, and so if he had that, he'd be chill. Really? What? They're famously, weirdly, mostly racist. There is a huge... It's really weird. I don't know the V-tubers themselves are, but they definitely pandered to a very all-right community. It's interesting.

There was a Tekken player named Afterschool So-F who was a V-Tuber and she played Tekken and then she just started one day going off about how it's okay to say the N-word as a joke and it sounds like a five-year-old girl saying all of this the tech and community was like

what the fuck is going on it was a crazy week and that's wild that's my exposure to V-tubers pretty much mostly it's mostly that and peanuts apparently peanuts I don't know man

I did see a clip recently of a V-Tuberer saying the N word but she's black but then she like code switches when she v tubes so she set the N word and she was like whoa wait I can say it she forgot that's a Larry David like I don't know she's method

she's like a method v-tuber yeah when does method when should method stop oh it's well it can't out of the V2 model is black or she is a black person is a black person and the model I don't remember can a black person Operating a white v-tube model

Is that person allowed to say it? Let's go out. I'd have to call it an expert on this one. Can Druski say it while doing white face? Oh my God. I think that's so... I think he can say any slur when he's doing white face. I think he becomes exodian.

He's not being like World War II slurs. All slurs are open to a Drusky white face. He's got to be the bald guy too, though. It depends what era of white guy he's becoming. No, I feel like if he can't say the N-word while doing white face, consequently that means a white person doing blackface can say the N-word. No, you can't apply the same rules. You can't do the same rules.

The rules are different. I've tried it does not work. Okay. Yeah. That was a crazy day at Universal. Ludwig has this threat over his head right now. This is the fan that if they don't get their merch, he's doing white face as a lot of, he's posing his Ludwig in white face and plans on saying the N-word to,

get let me cancel because he didn't receive him. And we look alike. That's the worst part. Yeah. Is this all true? This is a person threatening. And so how are we looking buddy? How are we looking? The 20-day countdown started. I'm not in a rush. Could we maybe be in a rush? It's kind of

take it as it comes. How is the schedule looking at free this week? Haven't checked? Haven't checked? Have it checked. Okay, because I'm out for a week. I'm incapacitito. Probably getting taken care of. Okay. All right. I'm looking for. He's probably on it. I hope so.

I really hope so for our sake. And Phil, what do you think the weirdest thing is about Ludwig in your time being around him? Oh, it's, it is pretty jarring seeing him on and off camera. Really?

Yeah. Are you guys jarred at all? We've known him for a long time. He's a piece of shit that we ate. I was jarred because I've always been close with cutie, but not Ludwig. And then I remember the last time I came here, he was so kind. And I was like, what the fuck?

You're kind? Oh. I'm fucking nice. He's secretly a nice person. Fucking nice as hell. Wait, is that? Oh, did I see a clip?

Are you saying that? Yeah, I talked about it because I was very jarred. Yeah. He freaked out. Yeah, I was like, freaked out. It's like,

what the fuck? He's like really nice. You made that, was it the tweet you were last visiting and you're like, cutie and little bit are like my parents. They're like checking in on me every morning and like making,

and they bought me like a whole outfit? Well, I realize that online. I've occasionally come across like, you know, maybe sexist or egotistical or racist I just thought like louder that, that yes

louder? What isn't like the others? You thought he'd be a little more loud One of those is terrible. You shouldn't be that around people. But only one of fat one. You shouldn't be that around people. Inbred.

So you thought you, well that one's all these are a character I play online. The inbred fat guy who's racist and sexist. And there's just a shortage of them online And in person I'm only inbred Inbred I can't help it You can't get away from that

Yeah that one I can't escape So you just thought he'd be louder Offline? I didn't think he was mean Ever You said loud, that's what you said Yeah, so like he'd yell at his girlfriend or something No, I thought he'd just be like He said nice

Yeah nice To be louder and meaner is what you expected Yeah But he was quieter and nicer Yeah You're just disgusting inbrids Miserfuckiar What the hell is even that about?

I was being frowned. Why the hell is even that about? You've been barking at me for no reason today. No French guy would ever say disgusting in bread, because it's, it's... It's implied. No. Yeah. Is it disgusting?

Is it? No. Does it be an indictment of your country, man? It actually is beautiful to be in bread in France. It implies royalty. We've got it home-made. Mama's cooking. A guy bends down.

A Frenchman gets down on one knee and from. of a sister and I think you know what I'm going to ask you know because it's been such a beautiful life to be together all I do more like this it's such a beautiful life to be together now my sister I love the face man I love the face what was the last time you were scared that's a great question

that's a good question really fucking scared and we asked all women on his pocket Yeah, we were really fucking scared. You get scared. What was the last time of you're fucking scared? I get scared a lot. Yeah, so when was the last time? Yesterday when there was a spider on the blanket.

Oh, yeah, she was scared. Do you jump up? I was actually really... But she didn't move too much as good, so I can capture it. Yeah. And it was pretty big and quick. Yeah, I was brave. Okay.

We're very proud of you. It was about quarter size. It was really big. We got one of the, I already said this, but we got one of the bug catchers at home. And you can catch it. And then you can magnifying glass. My problem with that is, like, I feel like that stick becomes an extension of me.

So if I were to use that, it would feel like I'm touching it. You're touching the spider. Interesting. One time, I poured mouthwash onto a spider in my bathroom, and it died really fast. Yeah, but God damn it, smile going down. Oh, my. And the smile was glowing. Yeah, the listerine made it really sparkful.

I think the spider had braces. One time, one time slime said he heard an ant scream. What? Okay, when I was a little kid, okay, when I'm a kid, it's become like a tick in other friend groups you're not even a part of. Like, when I'm hanging out with like Alex and Eric, like, out of silence, someone would be like and slime, heard of aunt scream. When I was a little kid, when I was a little kid, my mom was vacuuming with one of

the hand vacuumers, and she vacuumed. I was sitting on the, the carpeted stairs, and she's vacuuming the stairs, and I was watching an aunt, and she sucked it up in the vacuum tube, and I, and I, you've sucked it up in the vacuum tube. I heard it's so funny to everyone it's so crazy. It's your best story. That's your peak story.

It's a great story, bro. I can't see it. The hardest she's last all that. I can't see this story the way other people see it. When I'm here it, I imagine that like that was Frank Sinatra in a past life. Do you guys, when you hear every time I hear

every time somebody says it, I imagine what the ants scream would be like. Yes, that's funny. Yeah, of course, yeah. Because it's getting sucked in the back keep, too, so we'll be like, It's high pitch. I imagine a man's scream. It's crazy, dude.

I don't think it has to fade away, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, as it goes up the... That is how it's... I'm not kidding, that is how it sounded. And I remember it so vividly, and I get fucking cloned. And it's... Yeah, we believe you. You don't believe me.

No, I believe you, bro. I'm hysterically laughing. I always believe you. dude. I always believe you and I love you, man. No, you don't. You only love me but you think I spew lies. I love you in spite of your lies. Even though he's a snake.

Yes. You think I'm a snake? I know you're a snake, but I so love you. I'm not a snake. Snakes are fucking scary. Like I don't think I have a day-to-day fear of snakes, but a fucking rattlesnake in front of me right now. You ever walk by one? I'm like a hike or something? Like a garter snake. Yeah, I walk in front

of him and I go. A little rattle guy. Gart or garden? Garter? I'm not scared of snakes, dude, because if they... Gardener snake. Gardener. Oh, gardener. I'm realizing just your aura, we all got really weird.

Really? I thought it was just you guys. No, no, no. We said you did a podcast with Emily and Hitler. Hold up. That was your dream podcast. That was your dream to do that. I think I was coerced into it by slime though. Like he was...

What the fuck did you? I never make fun of any fucking rice. It's such a scene. Is it such a scene? And go, oh me, fuck me, sister, I wake up. Who's the funniest person you know in your life?

It doesn't have to be a straight way. Oh, Abdullah. Who's that? He's my friend called duty. Oh, wait, no, you're not coming at dinner. I saw him. You saw him? I saw him.

Funniest person in my life. Who is this motherfucker? He's a friend-shadow. He's a TikToker. Disgusting. But he's a TikToker. Okay. Abdullah, the TikToker.

It's like a Jeff Dunham puppet. Yeah, I try to steal his jokes. Who do you think the funniest person is here? And who would you should? shoot in the leg but not kill. They have to be the same person? Yeah. Wait, does she still kill making this scenario? No, no, no,

shooting the leg but not kill. You don't even listen. But no, this is a new scenario. Just shoot to restrain. I'm just asking who the funniest person is and then you shoot them. And I have to shoot them in the leg. Yeah. She was wisely. Chair looks, the chair feels good. I think for my humor slime. Hey. Good folks.

By the way, her humor is like, I diarrheaed my penis today. fan tweet is very like, you know, I'm all seen them. It's like, here's a fan fan tweet. It's like a picture looking at the beach. And it says like, this reminds me of penis.

Yeah, this reminds me. Four billion lights. It's my reason of burying a dump. My friend has the same humor as you. Which is. He has like, you, you call him the one liner guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, okay.

Is your friend awesome? Yeah. Okay. And you have good, um, wordplay. Yeah. There's a lot of single target damage. There's into, yeah, yeah, yeah. single target

but like what are you a OE yeah what am I elemental I like that was in

healer healer healer yeah I do feel like your humor is like mage

humor thanks bro yeah it's like it's like it's like from the it works really well

it always lands for like two damage but it's never missing you know I mean yeah like he said something earlier about the

and thing which made me laugh hard He was like, I imagine it to be a man's scream. So it was funny of me. One of my favorite things about Ludwig, but also something I have deep disdain for because he wins so much in his life

is the rare scenario where he will meet, like, normy friends of mine that have really no idea what he does, but then he's still the most electric person in the room. Yeah. And I have mixed feelings. Let me tell you this. He honed his skills through streaming

because he didn't used to be like this. He used to be a fucking. drag. It's not true, bro. And you fucking know it, bro. He was never a drag, though. He would be a drag.

Okay, if, if Ludwig got seven beers in him... With the first moment we met, there were sparks, and you're acting like it was an electric night. And you know what,

Fiona? It's fucking true. But also, seven beers... Seven beers turns him into the most evil man in the world, or the coolest man in the world back then.

It was a 50-50. And now I don't drink. And now you don't drink. five months clean off that shit I'll fucking clean you up for five months and I'll break it tonight with one night for you See that's that he's so hot and cold with me This is how he gets sometimes

I feel like you would have the craziest Like hate sex Oh I could pleasure him like he's never been pleasure before I would make him scream like an aunt I think Oh my God and I'm a big fucking piece of candy I'm a big jolly rancher on the ground That you're just all over me bro

All we need to say today. You're an aunt. I'm a fucking sucker. That's been dropped at the amusement park. And you're fucking crawling all over me, bro. Anything you want to say. Took me back to the hill. Guess I got to share you with my friends. Anyone you want to thank or anything you want,

anything you want, people direct you to. No. Nothing? You really don't care anymore. I'm fan fan fan. Fan fan, you stream on Twitch. That's your main source of income and your main vehicle for doing what you do.

Fan fan. Fan fan, my mom listens to every episode. Is there anything you like to tell her? Hello, Mother Nick That's it My mom birthed me I'm an important person I would never say the C word in front of you

Because I respect you I respect you too What is that What did I just catch out of your eye What was that? It was a glint I was supposed to like not miss that I respect you as well

What do you don't look Don't cut Archie don't cut to any Don't cut to that camera Say I'm not me I don't know if it's the way I'm saying it But I do It's the eyes. Okay, I respect her.

Okay. All right, fan, fan, thanks for coming on. Thanks for having me on. Thanks for going on. We're going to go to the Patreon episode. Fanfan will magically disappear out of the van seat that she's sitting in, and it might likely be the four of us or maybe three of us. I don't want to do it.

I'm deciding not to do it. Explode me. He's late for Squeaks his thing. Anyway. Boom. Bye. Boom. Bye-bye.