The Yard - Ep. 237 - Going To The Superbowl

Episode Date: February 11, 2026

This week, the boys talk about going to the superbowl, Slime trying Ludwig's performative garbage bag method, and how Slime ran into a frat leader at ASU and got brutally frame mogged by him.. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Don't wiggle it up and down. Like waggle, waggle it for me. You like when I wagget it? Like when I wag it? Hey, shake my hand. We're a little early in the episode. Shake my hand, bro. Shake my hand.

Oh, sorry. Oh my god. Dude, he's never caressed the head of my penis like that. That was crazy. That was a real grab, bro. Shake my hand, bro. Oh yeah. Shake my hand.

Hey dude, it's really like, wait on. Can I tap it? Yeah, yeah. Ow. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck yeah, bro. Is it.

Is it. It's sensitive, yeah, bro. Do you think we'll get censored for this? Sometimes when you get, when you're born, they just take off all the nails. They just cut them off. Just cut the nail beds straight off. I genuinely think YouTube's content algorithm

has, will mark this as a weird penis. I think this episode will only go to burnt peanut fans. You find that shit funny. What the fuck? This is real funny. No, it's funny. But it's also your penis is a hand. It looks so crazy.

It does. It's a little Jackie Chan's hand. That's Jackie Chan's hand. I'm talking to shit on burnt peanut because it's hot, but we have the number one burnt peanut fan in this building. Nick Yingling. No. He's like,

how does he play as a peanut? No. You? No. Oh my God. Kelby May. Of course, bro. It's because he gets viewers.

Of course. And Kelby's a racist man. Kelby, first off, Kelby's not racist. Oh, yeah. Anyone here's racist, it's me. Second, burnt peanut is an electric factory that makes

Kelby giggle. And when I'm streaming, I find out that Kelby watches burnt peanut instead of me. Can I give me my theory? I'm a burnt peanut. I think. I'd love to hear this. All of a sudden,

we've got this guy. He's on Twitch. He's got super high level production. He's anonymous. He's confirmed to be tall. Welcome back, Dr. Disrespect. Oh! Is he, does he?

I've never watched a single frame of burnt peanut. Does he sound like him? Not at all. But Dr. Disrespect, known for doing all sorts of clever disguises. And they've been live at the same time, but no,

but he's figured that shit out, bro. We got Claude now, we got Chachapit, Gemini, do you want to keep going?

He had Claude take over the OG. Yep. Okay, well, does burnt peanut ever talk about gripping it hard

right now and I'm about to let loose a big one right now? No, because that's crucial Dr. disrespect moment.

Because he learned his lesson, bro. He learned his lesson. He doesn't say that shit anymore because that's what

got him fucking canceled, bro. And he's a peanut. And he's a now he was like, what if I was a peanut I can cancel a peanut.

How do you to cancel a peanut? Lock up a peanut? What do you put a penis? There's nothing a damn grit. There's nothing a damn grit. How would a peanut wear its pants? My question. Overall.

I guess there's only one way if we're a peanut to wear its pants. Hello, thank you. It's like, it's a... Oh, it feels like my girlfriend's feet when I get in the bed. Like 4 a.m. Oh, man. We miss you, Jackie. Wherever you are.

Bless your fucking heart. Jackie was murder. I think his body was destroyed. His head was donated. His head's still in the gym though. I thought his head was supposed to be donated to science. His chest was destroyed. His chest was destroyed, but his head is sideways on the little fridge where the workout stuff is.

Oh, right. He's always looking at people workout out. Yeah, he looks at you workout. And he looks at your squat form and he's like, rough. He'll do it that way. Also, you're Chinese Ludwig. Sounding good. Dude, maybe this whole time Ludwig was just speaking to the Jackie Chan head.

And he's just like, what do I do next, Jackie? Tell me which way. Which way do I go, Jackie? Is that it? God for me, a white boy learn. Finally, you're taking some L's this year. Fucking finally. Give me, my name's Ludwig,

and I'm trying to find where to go. Okay. Something you'll definitely need to say. Definitely a crucial thing to say. That will come up 100%. Yeah, like 100 p. Whoe doing? My dondon dong dofou.

Lai doing my don't dong dofou. Buhuu. doing what I don't dofou? I don't be a doing with a don't don't dofu Okay, that cannot be There's, I mean there's a chance You know, beautiful language, it's possible, it's rhythmic I just feel, I feel like you shouldn't be doing that

Should we censor that? Should I feel like I need to censor that? Because I'm speaking fluent Mandarin and it pisses you off What is that? You don't understand? You need to explain yourself No, I don't. You need to educate yourselves. Okay, Archie subtitle it and then we can't help you. Well, that means they're sure Aiden. That sounds way more... The problem with when Aiden speaks Chinese is that he does it softly and scared. He does, yeah.

He does no confidence. He does... Aidan. It doesn't matter that I have that prompted from you. But it still doesn't... It's eyes. It's an eyeball thing. You were scared to be Chinese, son.

I am not scared to be Chinese. I'm not scared to grip my heritage. Because I don't think I'd do it right. I want to grip it by the horns. You want to grip me by the horns? No, yuck. I want to grip my heritage by the horn. Your heritage?

Chinese. I thought you meant the Finns. I thought you're fine. reclaiming the Finns? Not for a while. I would love to see a video of Aden IRL streaming and then it gets brutally China mugged by a frat leader at ASC. Dude I knew you're gonna I was like my over under my head is like three minutes. When is he gonna say Jack Dordy China Mogged by frat leader at at G.A. Tour event. Me and you would probably be jester gooting somewhere nearby. Of course.

We'd be jester gooning aka or maxing really if we're on a good day. The Femmoids didn't like his, no, sorry, the foids? Boyd's is new, man. The foids? Which is presumably short for, by the way, a hundred years old, Ben. Yeah, you really, you actually do. The foids. The sexist. Yeah, man.

I'm not, you're, you know, you're a moid. I'm a moid. Oh, I'm a moid, yes. Honestly. Moid mocked by ASU fret, guys. Dude, what is going to be left of all the fortune in, so speak? Because it's like, surely they have scraped the resin pipe of all of that.

And now it's just out there in the wild on Twitter and shit. It's high concentrate, too, what they got. I'm like going crazy. I'm like, that just kid. That one tweet, I tried to read it like five times. I think the one with the clip of the guy of the ASU campus. Yeah, I mean, it's, well, if you break it down, it's very simple. I think I'm one with the, like, I think I can read it.

And I'm like, yeah, that is what happened. Can we get a tweet up zipper? I love an Aden breakdown. I can't. I can't do it. I would love an effort. I think I would be, I have a better shot. I'd have a better shot at waiting Chinese.

Just look at my ASU frame mug. Oh, you just want the frame mug tweet. I mean, is it like? That kind of looks crazy. I mean, he's, it's a... Genuinely, that's what I looked like when I went to ASU too. Oh, yeah? Really?

That guy's like, like, 5-5. Uh, yeah, I was like the 6-5 version, but... Same idea. Just adding five inches to your height. I frame-mogged. Do you think I frame-mogged you guys on this podcast? Um, yeah. Framewise?

Right now? Yeah. Because you look good right now. you tummy mug me right now no it's and there's no reason you should zipper

I'll be honest yeah that was a test there's no reason you should that was a test if you could instantly pull up what I was talking about we'd have to have to talk

and thank God this is your year of else I don't have any else finally well okay are you sure because I was actually going to come in here

with a very a little bit of a heartfelt moment about Ludwig. Really? And I think it was exactly against what you're saying. Oh. Well, his team lost.

It's just embarrassing fashion. You don't give a shit about the Patriots. You care about Tom Brady's weird dick. Well, I like Tom Brady's pretty huge and awesome dick.

I love that. He could still be weird. I love bad boon. His, his... I like bad boon. What is this? Bad bunny, bro.

Oh, I don't know. It's crazy. Because can you pull up the tweet like you can read this shit Like it's fucking literature that you've studied for years But bad boony gets you confused Like you are a classic American

I just didn't put it together I just didn't have a slight accent The halftime show bro I know I just didn't know you say it like that This artist name is he an OG YouTuber as well Oh see that could have been something We could have gotten to that right You probably could convince him

We could probably find someone who actually was an OG YouTuber Do it the opposite way And what? You know what I'm saying? Oh like yeah And pretend we're lying We're like oh Charles Strippy What he's the king

but he used to be like a vlogger. And he's like, nah, I'm not falling for that one again. Okay, clavicular ran into a frat leader at ASU and got brutally framed-mogged by him. This one doesn't have in... This is... I've never watched this with sound, I'm not kidding.

I don't know what they're saying because it's blaring. Yeah, it's just like... You always fucked up by this guy? What sport does he play? I can't even tell by his physique. He's a body body... He just goes to the gym. He just goes to the weights.

Oh, he, he was fucked up. Oh, can you like, can you be like a like a bodybuilder at ASU as like your, what you're full ride into? You know what I mean? Like can you get a full ride to bodybuild at a school? I don't know. But he's just there. He's a frat leader. He didn't say it was a sport.

I assume if he's a student, he's in some sort of sport. That's what it's, that's what I would guess. That's what he's just a guy who goes ASU who joined a frat and who started taking trend. Who works out like we need him on the wrestling time. Five days a week. And he probably skips legs. I'm guessing. We can imagine that.

With that frame, he actually has the actual Dorito. Like, it's kind of a grotesque Dorito. But at the end of the day, if you don't have the frame, Doritos a Dorito. So I'll eat it. But yeah, you, I've been, that guy is showing, I found out he was under 21. Wow, bro. I mean, he goes to ASU.

No, no, not the, not the frat leader, not group leader. But yeah, and he's like, he got, like, arrested for being underage. It's crazy how much, like, price he's getting because he's this insane dude who is, like, doing drugs and trying to like face smash and bone smash. Can I say what's crazy? What? How much you're keeping up? It's because,

much like everyone else, it's a big window into a subculture that I would otherwise not have. Right? Because I'm 35. Right. And getting fat. Sure. I'm not frame mugging anyone.

Well, you know, there's no foids. Taking up the frame. Sure, I guess. No voice. Sure.

Yeah. Yes. I want, you know those videos where it'll be it'll be like a guy like that or like Kaisenat did this where he goes and hangs out with a fraternity for a day. Yeah. Like crazy fraternity go to party.

I want him to do that. I want slime. I'd be electric. Slime spends a day with a fraternity. If it's my job to like fucking hang out with those guys, it'd be fun. If I was thrown in there and I didn't want to be there, then I'd be a little upset.

I think you could make some magic. I'm not saying that you would. I sent Ludwig So I tried to Ludwig tried to call me The other day during his stream And then he remembered he shouldn't do that And so I'm calling him back

And I'm like please you know And then I'm watching him stream And he just like, boop flips my call off You can't hold the call? Yeah Yeah And I'm like And then I messaged

He messaged me the next day And I was like, why'd you do that? And he's like, I forgot I forgot that I shouldn't talk to you And I was like, that's fine That's fine We have talked about this We've talked about it

We've talked about this on the yard. And so... It was in no slime zone. And then I replied to him because he wanted to give me a clavicular update on live on broadcast. And then I replied to him, if a LARPing Stacy tries to justify you at all,

even mid-mog, you're essentially cortisol maxing to any FOID. And your response loving? Aidan, want to break that down for me? Oh my God. Just break it down. Like, what does that mean in layman's terms for the people at home who aren't?

Justicular maxing. It's just a one mooseer upon you all. It's about the same. Yeah, I thought this game's so fucked up. Colvicular ran into ASU's top frat leader while jester maxing with Jim cells and instantly clocked peak coat.

The frat fraud leader went full UV Dodge maxing and weight coat maxing, inflating fake stats to protect frame after being skull-mogged, while clab deep-locked in, nuked cortisol-stabilized aura. How do I even say that, Bart? Deep-locked-in, nuked cortisol, stabilized aura, and dodged irreversible, shout-out PSL,

PSL, PSL bleed by a millimeter. What is PSL? I don't know. It's still penis-Rleague. It's still penis-Sarly, clearly. It never changed it. I actually, this is, reading this makes me feel how,

when people explain competitive Pokemon to me. I think literally, It sounds like, it sounds the same. They're adding fakeware. They're adding fluff. Do you know what I mean? Fluff? Yeah.

Yeah, but it's, he's a full UV Dodge Max. I know, but it's like, it's all fluff. It's basically like, uh, but you know when they do those like

slowed down melee clips and it's like all the inputs? Yeah. Yeah, they're kind of fluffing it. Yeah. Yeah, because it's like one is just like doing like

quarter circle back and it's like down, down diagonal right. Right. And it's like, okay. Presses forward to run. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Because all they're trying to say is the guy who looks big was doing less weight than clav. I really like D blocked. That's good. I never heard that one. Well, this is, it's a, it's a wonderful experiment and exploration in the human language.

That's, and that's beautiful. It's like, we can say with 19 weird crazy words what we could say with five. Yes. And that's cool. That's why this is interesting. And Clav,

please, bro, answer my fucking emails, bro. Bro. You want you on the pod. We need you on this pod. We need you bad, bro. This is the next step for us.

We want a pod max with you, bro. He, like, talks about doing meth. And then a kick, a kick, uh, admin was in his chat while he's playing counterstrike and says, and called him the soft A N word. And then he just looked at it and then set it out loud. And he was like, what the fuck? And it was like, it's just, it's the Wild West over there. Yeah, it's the Wild West.

They're bringing it back. They're bringing it back. They're bringing it back. They're bringing it back. When are you signing your contract, bro? With kick? Yeah. They're not going to throw me one.

I've been trying for years. Dude, you can get it crazy. Is your Hail Mary? They won't throw me a bone? Huh? And then you go burnt-painted after that. You switch? I can't.

And then you turn yourself into like a... Dude. You know what I mean? I do think I go ghost one day. And I come back, but I don't tell people to me as a V-Tuber. What would you be? Huh? I would be...

Dad. No, probably just like... Clavicular Cartoon Macs. Cartoon character. It'd be the same shape as that guy? You'd be like the now deceased

in cell known as clavicular. Yeah. And I would frame mug like the screen itself. You'd get more Dorito like and frame mug. Yeah.

And you'd have to see the game play like between my arms and Lats and there's not a lot of space between there. Dude, this guy, I was, I got to the end yesterday at Minecraft

and it was, well, if I beat it, I would be jumping around right now. Yes. You did not beat it. But this guy I was streaming and this guy comes in and it's like it highlights

first time chat and he just starts getting really mad about Iron Mouse and he's like fucking trash Iron Mouse mods fucking bullshit. She can sing perfectly and it doesn't even fucking matter. Absolute trash community. And I stopped and I was yesterday I turned on the stream. Usually I turn it on

is like I'm a guy playing games that happens to be live. Today I was like I'm a streamer today. So it was in a great mood. And but and I look and I say Everyone, come, gather around. There is Iron Mouse drama going on. Wow. And it has to do with her voice. Wow.

And it spills over in a community is like mine. It sounds like he got banned in Iron Mouse's chat, but really respects for singing. So. Which is great like to say in a first time chat in a mind, a bald guy playing Minecraft, he's like, let me talk. Let me talk my shit. She does sing really well. That's great.

Yeah. And I didn't know that. And when you become a V-Tuber, you can sing. I mean, here's the deal. It's not. It's not fun drama. What's talking about? With Iron Mouse.

It's not fun drama. It's not fun drama. It's never fun drama. I mean, that's a fun message for you because you're outside in. Here's my take. If you're a computer woman, you can withstand literally anything because no one can tie that to who you are. Unless they try doxing you and then successfully do.

Unless they try doxing you and successfully do. But even then it's like not the most, what I'm saying is when people say shit and I get mad at it. but if it was like, if I was an anonymous computer woman, I genuinely would, it would wash over. But then your anonymity would literally be your defense mechanism. So anyone tearing down your anonymity would be incredibly anxiety inducing. Of course, I'm not saying it wouldn't be.

If I was a woman, that shit would wash over me. Low key. You think so? And I'd be playing on my breasts all day too. Oh my God. I was a woman, that shit wouldn't hurt me. Why does it bother them so much? I wouldn't even be bothered it.

They could just Sanpain more I heard. So what's the deal? Period doesn't even come that often. So I'd probably just clutch that one. too. I'm so beautiful. I feel like a big poop. You think it would clutch a period. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, probably. Every time. I mean, how do you choke a period? Especially if it's funny. No, I was just thinking. I'd have the lightest flow.

Do you see a, sorry, a second Chimko breakup at the timeline? Yeah, what the fuck is happening? What? Do they get drafted into some? What do you need two breakups? Kai Day and Tens broke up. Yeah. And then Sakura and Jason broke up. Oh, is that real? Yes, dude. I saw like 20 clips of like he walked out of the room because she cheated or something. Was that, are this fake? Oh my God. I'm not.

We can't be part of this. Are those fake? I don't know. It's embarrassing, bro. Why is that the only? You know what's crazy? What? That's what got fed to me.

You are a news podcast. Yeah. And here you are spewing tertiary clips with fake fucking titles. No, I'm not done. He's not done. He's not done with you, bro. When there's primary sources that just give you the information. That seemed fake to me.

There's just a Jason tweet. I didn't see it. Oh, you didn't see it. I didn't see it. I saw the clip about the fake thing. I saw the clip of the fake thing and then said it on the podcast. And it was fine. And you listen, news podcast.

Don't you have any fucking shame about that? They didn't talk about it on the daily. So it's like, what am I going to do? Because that comes out on Wednesday. I'm Michael Babar. And this comes out every day. What? Jason,

It does. It's Tuesday, I guess. It's Tuesday. We do this every day. Jason and soccer. Well, great. Love's dead, guys. Great. Probably the worst fucking news in my week. Love's fucking dead. Love's dead. What are you supposed to do? Like in this fucked up great.

Dude, I was, this one's way shorter. They always ask kindly for privacy on this matter. And then they never get it. Did Clebba channel just make it up? Yeah, more than ever, they just make it up. shit up actually I opened up TikTok and it's actually a it's a battlefield news maxing it's just people

making shit up and then people run in with the rumors that's so interesting it seems miserable it's actually made me very vindictive for people that I don't even are my community what like you watch the clip and then you start hating yeah hating Sakara for what she did to do you see no no hating like uh I think we should get her

like stream comms down down with Sakara yeah streaming that whole she did she did that. That family of heartbreakers. Look at that shit. This is what's coming for you

if you fuck with our boys' heart again. Well, you're gonna beat her up? No. Cresky, Chrisky, no. No, I would frame mug her,

obviously. Okay, we're gonna pull a frame monger, bro. I have a contact at ASU. She's going down. Me, me pain an ASU student to walk in the background of her stream.

Yeah, it is, it's crazy. I don't even, I'm not even, and the same channels you are of the world and I see it. It doesn't make me sense.

I mean, he sees it. You're telling me people just make shit up. What, Aiden, you're making a joke about it, but you are as obtuse as a man gets. I'm not obtuse. Well, can you call him that? Yes, easily. Like, woke is kind of back.

I don't think you should. He's obtuse, and I'll say it twice. He's cute. I'm not obtuse. Nope. And you saw the clip. You saw it. You couldn't name the top

Five most subscribed streamers right now You couldn't come close Oh my God Janksy That's got to be one of them Okay Jason Dewein Okay yeah

That's right I think he's just doing Association with letters He's actually killing it I mean Ron's probably up there He is up there Wow top five He's up there yeah

He's fifth but Yeah I feel like Kai would residually be in the top five. I don't know how you know that, but yeah. And then... He has four or five? Come on, bro. Stapmog him, please.

Yeah, everything falls apart if you get this right. No. Brutally, brutally. Oh, and then burnt peanut. No way. Almost all wrong. Wait, who's the top five? You see what he did tell.

Who's the top five? You fucking tricked me? Excellent work, bro. You fucking tricked me? You had a ass. It was ass. Who's the top of life? Like,

Chris Chamelon level twist. Faye Sumpathon hasn't happened for a while, brother. You're living a few months ago. I knew something goes off when he said to Ron. He's like, Ron's up there. I was like, Rons was a pole, too sugar.

To a sugar most of. Ron was my least certainly. It made me feel so good about it. It's burnt peanut, Cadryl, Asmin, jinky, Koso.

Oh my God. Wait, so up, come on. You went 40%. That's not close. Dude, I got a lot in the top 10. You got three of the top 10. You got three of the top 10.

Burt Pinot is 10? Yeah, he's the guy right now. What the fuck is Tifu up there? Yeah. And Banks has that tattoo. Wait, hold up. This is actually wrong. Wait, this seems...

Go up. Click subscribers. At the top, at the top, at the top, at the top, at the top, at the top, at the top, at the top. There is. I was like, I can't believe burnt peanuts one. You got one for five. Who is Christina and Amber? So it is janksy that.

Who is Zuditi Palma? So anyway, you are not in authority on this. Christina and Amber? Are they laundering? And the fact that you're asking... Who are people? See? Oh my god, wait, they have all gifted.

They have 43,000 gifted. This is what that's laundering. Is you are reading names and you're like, who are these? They're laundering money, which is cool. I think that's a great use of Twitch. I'm not kidding. Who is schlorox? That's like a character they made up for a Ricky Mori episode, bro.

That's insane. Yeah, yeah. Do you know, Vitox? Huh? Do you know Vidal? No. Who is Vidal? Uh, Vidal's, uh, Vietal's

AI. No way. Kill yourself, robot. What do you, what's your point here? That you don't know shit and yet you still are, are, you are consuming clips. No, that are on your for you page.

It just gets, and then, and then, I'm not, I'm not saying it's your fault. I didn't even say that was true. I didn't even say that was true. It's not,

it's regardless of whether it's true or not, you didn't know the truth. All you knew is the clip. Wait. And I'm asking you, because I know it's not true, I'm asking you to, explain what is. You're getting offended because

you're personally obtuse and an idiot. That's not what I feel offended because of all that shit. Don't be mad just because Drake May couldn't complete a fucking pass yesterday. Oh my God. You don't know anything about football. Must have been nice paid five figures to watch that fucking shit fest. I'm unaffered because you don't know anything

about football. What? I know the Seahawks won that fucking game. It's easy to see what is on the data screen. Aidan is from Washington and he's like yeah, I'm running for the Seahawks and probably what happened yesterday. He's playing CS2. He goes, Oh, cool. And then he turns it back to play his fucking...

That's base, though. That's how most people should engage with sports. Oh, if the Broncos were there, I would have done the same shit. I would have been fighting the Ender Dragon be like, oh, they won. Yeah. Who cares? But then you say who cares. But he's sitting here pretending like, do you have Christ of Patriots.

He was born near Seattle. No, it's not his right because he isn't no shit. He couldn't name four Seahawks players. Give them two. Walker the third. What do you mean Walker the third? What's his name? That's like a four-knit-stram.

Walker the third. What's his fucking name? What's his last name? You think people call him Walker the third. And then Shaheed? Mm. Are you just reading the back of their jerseys? That is a tag and player.

Or that's taking care. What else am I supposed to do? What read the back of their jerseys, bro? No their name. I can't read the back of their jerseys? Lock me up. Lock me up, I guess. It says their name.

I know, but like, it's just like, it's just like, it's just, it's like immediately, it's like name stream. It's like name streamers. You got, um, augren, uh, obbi. You think that. That's the same. Yes. You think that's the same.

Yes. I'm obtuse. Yes. It's the same. Also, that's only two. That I said four. It's not my fault

that when I log into X, it feeds me, because it feeds me so much. There's so much on there. Everything is on it. And it chooses to feed me falsely titled clips. I think it is your fault

because you go on your other podcasts and you brag about how you've stopped watching short form content, brain raw content. I did. So much so that your algorithms change. It did on YouTube. Yet you're consuming so much brain rot on X that you're leaving with a conclusion that soccer cheated on Jason, he cried out to walk out the street. I did. And so, and so who are you?

And listen up. Listen up, bro, because he's telling the truth to you. Who are you? Okay. You're like Walker the fucking second, by the way. Wow. Yeah. The disgraced Walker. Before he had a son who became Walker the third. I'm like the father of a very successful NFL player. You don't know what Walker the second did, bro. And you don't want to be him. If you did what Walker the second did, we wouldn't be fucking friends anymore. He's Walker Jr. I know more than you. So anyway, yeah, that's my fucking point. And you're too. Football sucks, by the way.

Yeah, I mean, yesterday's game sucks. You hate when Grants is just peach buff. Peach puff. What are we going to do? We got to watch it. Sometimes Grants is bad. Like what? Sometimes Grants is bad.

I mean, I'm not saying. If every Granger's good, that would kind of make it weird. Like you want. Every grand's can be good. I'm down. No, I don't think it can. I think it'd be fine if it was. It's once a year. That's enough time. Because you're thinking about it like if everything's good, nothing's, you know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But the whole tournament, there's so many games with four grants. That's the vegetables. So it's like there's so many vegetables before you watch it. I mean, to be fair, the same thing here. Like the top eight was amazing. It's just that Grants is bad. Right, there's more football before Super Bowl.

Yeah, yeah, a lot. I thought they kind of just picked two teams. Like, flip a coin. Yeah. That makes a lovely happy. tried to contact Jake Paul because, you know, he, he started talking about some stuff I really care about. He was talking about how Bad Bunny shouldn't fucking, he shouldn't be out there. The Paul brothers and Bad Bunny have beef.

Oh, why's that? Because the Paul brothers live in Puerto Rico for tax purposes. And Bad Bunny has spoken out against people who do that and kind of take advantage of Puerto Rico's taxes. And so then they've had, like, they've gone back and forth for that. Dude, this was, yeah, purposely turning out the halftime show. Let's rally together and show Big Quarrow. corporations, they can't just do whatever they want without consequences, which equals viewership for them. And he said, realize you have the power, turn off this halftime. A fake American citizen performing

who publicly hates America, I cannot support that. So I thought this was funny because he's basically saying when the halftime show comes on where no ads play, turn that shit off. When the game spins back up, it's time to watch it again. And that includes those epic base Super Bowl commercials that we like. So he said, stick it to corporations by only watching ads. Which I think doesn't really make sense. Anyway, I replied to him and I said, did you and your brother ever low-key just try stuff out on each other? Big fan, thanks for speaking out about this.

And I just, you know, I haven't gotten a reply back yet, but I'm really interested. Right, right. And his response. Because what is he going to say about that? Because I just want to know for like my fandom, like brain. Like a fandom brain. And he just hasn't gone back to him.

He just hasn't. Well, he gets a lot of messages. He does. He was probably slow. But eventually, get back to me and take. Yeah, we used to try stuff out on each other all the time.

Yeah, maybe that's one of the responses it could be. I went to the Super Bowl with all my high school buddies. Yeah. I flew them all out. Oh, really?

We all went, yeah. I didn't know that. Oh, it was like me, Christian, Jake, like literally like six of the guys. He's sick as a damn dog. Well, that's because he's hung over. Oh. He's hung because he's out there drinking, bro.

He's drinking. What were you drinking? No, I didn't drive out. I feel awesome today. Yeah. I have a sip. Oh. I don't have a sip.

We were at the casino until 2 a.m. last night. What do you go up or done? Dude. Talk to me, bro. Let's hear it. We're at the casino and, you know, things are going well. We're at Pi Gow. Yeah.

Guy at the table, okay, sits down. And I just made a conversation. I'm like, what do you do for work? He's like, I make microchips. Yeah. So we're guests in the company, and we don't get it quick. and he goes, it's the big one. DMC.

NVIDIA. Oh. Oh, shit. And I remember this article about the salaries of people at NVIDIA, and it's like 75% are millionaires. Like 50% of people at Avidia have a net worth of over like $20 million or something. Yeah. Whoa.

He got crazy, bro. And he's like, I worked there 21 years. Oh, okay. Oh, my God. So he got stock early. He's playing high out. He's desensitized. He's had his shit edged way too much

But I'm looking at his bets and I'm like Oh my god, he's not dealing No, no, no, he's sorry He's, yeah, he's playing Oh, yeah A guy like that For some reason I thought he said that he was the dealer No, no, he should have the table

I was so confused Having 20 million in Nvidia stock And just dealing at a casino Just for funsies That's what I want to deal poker When I, you know When I'm done with all this bullshit He was waiting for you to sit down

He just wanted someone to talk to Yeah, so we'll sit down at a pyeout table alone I mean he's He's putting a bullshit shit. The last bullshit. He's playing like $25 a hand. I'm like 20 mil. Yeah, some people don't have that shit in them. But, but then he's like, I'm going to do my classic bet. And, and like somebody who works there walks by. He's like, don't think I didn't see you. You know, Clark, some guy. And now he's acting familiar. And then he's like, and he's like, all right, time for my classic bet, Clark. And then

he throws up. Um, he Mickey. It's just $50 for his main bet. And then, $500 on just the bonus. Yes. Just the, just the bonus. And the bonus only hits if you bank a straight. It's hard.

Or higher. Yeah. Trips doesn't get you there because California sucks. And then it misses. And he's like, round two. Runs it four times,

just misses everyone. And he's like, all right, going home. Wow. And that was it. He's punted 2K on bonuses. What an interesting guy.

Like, if you hadn't sat down, do you think he just plays $25 hands until he's dead? No, because he said it was his hand. Maybe he would have picked the time for his spot later. Yeah. But I think he does this.

Or it's the go home hand. Pretty common. I wonder if he's ever... You do the go home one. Hit. For sure. I mean, of course. There's a lot of guys that play flippantly. Miles won enough to bought up by a Honda a cord off a guy who worked for... He did like special effects for Marvel.

And the guy was just like... He was like this 5-5 dude who was probably like 15. years old. He had a young prostitute with him and about 30K in chips and every time he played a poker hand it was like he was playing a slot machine and he would just

dump it and Miles waited and waited and then he won nine grand off of him. And people just do this like they just play or sometimes they'll like play like you know OMCs and do nothing all day and then go home and be rich. It's weird.

It's weird. People don't engage with gambling if you have a lot of money and maybe you've had it your whole life. I think they engage with it way different than most of us. So I have this new diet that hasn't really been working out. I basically eat these. Oh my God. Are you okay? Lovely. I'm sorry. I've been eating really bad. Really you too? I've only been eating Skittles fund it. Oh my God. Oh my God. You guys have both been eating the Oh my god. I've been eating about 60 of these a day.

I feel awful. That happened to him, it happened to me too. It's fucking on my stomach, you smell it. Oh, God. It smells like a glove box. It smells the old sweater. Stay with it for a bit. Do you want maybe some like higher quality or more nutritious food?

Like the OG fund dips? No, no, there's food that you could make it home. I know, but what, like, like, what? Oh, like what? Oh, like what? Like what? It sounds like an animal. It sounds like an animal.

It can be ready to eat in like 15 minutes or less. I don't use them quickly. It's time that you can prep at home. You need high quality nutritious food. It's something like it's ready to eat wheels. Oh fuck. It supplements to choose through each week. Are there like liquid versions?

Because they're really like liquid stuff. Dude, you can get smoothies, dude. Is there anything powder that I could dip in a white six to and suck off after? No, they don't have fun. It's only ingredients that are held to a high standard and avoids 200 additives like high fruit, just corn syrup preservatives and arpher sweeteners. It's hungry root Ludwig.

Hungry is what you need. That smells like Angus beef. Yes, dude. It smells like the bottom of a pantry. Stay with it. It gets better. How does chorizo cauliflower rice bowl sound?

Give me another one. I don't know if I like that. How does pork medallions and herb potatoes sound? That's kind of fun. What do you dip the medallions in? Is there like a powder? There's like a powder. There's no fun sticks.

There's no powder. I only add powder. And there's French onion and lamb stroganoff. I'm going to say stay away from that one because I think it might permeate the whatever blocker is not in your body. He's struggling off. I feel like I'm smelling just the inside of your body.

But there are so many, there's so many recipes. It doesn't, you can choose whatever you need that doesn't, it can agree with him. It's gonna happen again. I'm personally a favorite of the pita, you know, PETA. Oh, it's gonna happen again. So if you want that, Ludwig, you can take advantage of this exclusive offer for a limited time. Get 40% off your first box plus a free item in every box for life. Go to hunger root.com slash the yard and use code the yard.

That's hunger root.com slash the yard. Use code the yard for 40% off your first box. Force it over. I think it was Duke. And a free item of your choice for life. Love me, don't poop yourself. Don't Duke. Don't Duke.

I hate, I want to leave. I hate that you've done this to me. I want one more for the fans. I want them to go to hungryfruit.com slash the yard. One more for the fans. Code the yard. Oh no. Well, I,

I ended my night by going to blackjack and there was like a dealer change and the new dealer's sound goes, oh. And points at me. And I go, good luck charm. And so I, I have like $900.

I put like $600 in. And I get 20. And I'm feeling good. And then he has ace. Blackjack. And that's black check. No insurance? No, they didn't offer it at the table.

Oh, okay. Instant blackjack. You wouldn't take it anymore. I wouldn't take it anywhere. But instant blackjack. I'm like, whatever, 300. I get 11. I have to borrow money from Christian to double on a six.

long story short 21 I tip him $4 and if you're watching how's it going $4? That's all I had left You give him $4? I lost 902 hands Yeah but he likes you

What do I have to give him? You get more chips than you I don't have more cash Did you give him a picture? Couldn't have gone anywhere My bank limit was exceeded My withdrawal You didn't give him a picture

No I didn't give him a picture I don't know why you didn't do it I said four buck that's a four buck here fucking fame gets to people what if we get to me it's so disgusting how does fame get to people

I switch well you can look at yourself if you go to the bathroom and take a dump and look in the mirror you would see how it changed you why does the dump part necessary

to cleanse do you frame mug your high school friends Christian's huge bro Christian's pretty big I wouldn't call him Christian's pretty jacked no he's huge

I'm sorry yes he is he's very lean He's not, he is not very lean. Christian, I don't know what to say. Christian frame mocks you. Yes. I don't know.

We should test this when we get up. I genuinely think. Let's line us up because I think... Where is he, bro? His arms are the size of your calves, bro. I don't think that's true. You only seen him long-sleeving. That's, that contours to his...

Seam in an ASU beater. A little tiny one with the little straps on it. You can see his... Those are fucking... too horny, bro. Those like, those tank tiny ones. The iron. And it comes down here.

Yep. Shit. Let's get Christian one of those. One of those. You'll be shutting up real quick. I know he's bigger because he acts different now. Does he? In high school, he was like really small and scrawny and like his thing was being short

and fast. And that was his thing. We all knew one. And now he's big and frame mugs everybody. And so he acts like he's boldly. is what they call. No. Yesterday's what they were calling him

because he just started saying some shit. Like we were all Patriots fans were all from New England. Christian shows up in a Seahawks jersey. Why? He's not a Seahawks fan.

Christian's not a Patriots fan. He's not a Patriots fan. He's not a Patriots fan. He's saying come take it off me. Just to fuck with us. Come rip it off me. Come take it off me, bro. I fucking nail you.

Do it. And so Drake made him throw an interception and he'd turn and be a bad throw. And then I'm like, And I'm like, that's a little too far. And then he goes like this. Oh, yeah. What you used to do to us!

I'm like, what's going on here? This is good. What's going on here? Yes, it's a year of Ludwig else. But the thing is, if you, I don't know, I think you would, who wins in a fight? You were Christian. I don't even want to test it.

He doesn't want to talk about that. Because Jake's walking around. He's like telling a story. He's like, yeah, and it was actually really Spenshal Day. Uh-oh. Big mistake. Spential? Oh, like.

Spencell day? Oh, it's special day. It's a special day today. It's a special day today. Yeah, Chris shows him to the fucking ground. I didn't use him in a fucking arm bar. What's special now? Cigarette shut.

Are you spential? Are you spent? Are you spent? It was so bad at one point. I'm gambling with Jake. He's got his last 100. He loses it all. Christian walks over.

Like he walked away to like vapor a second. He walks over. And he goes, wow out of the chips. Dude. That is. I could hear him saying that. There are no chips there? What happened to them?

Are there supposed to be none? I did field research this weekend, by the way. On what? The trash bag method. Oh yeah, I saw that. We all know. We all went to a wedding. Biting my shit.

I wasn't biting it. I was experimenting. It's clearly an homage. You bite my shit. It's okay. Biting someone's shit is seeing someone wear jeans and then the next day saying nothing and showing up in the same jeans. Hoping no one notices that you gene-mogged or gene

Gene stole Gene Maxed Gene Guys what could this be We gene Not jacked See this is why we're not these guys We don't think we have this

I don't think I have it I'm gonna work on this Yeah because you're the word guy And you kind of fucked it all up And we expected you to pick up Slack Because what am I doing? I'm obtuse I'm not gonna get it

You're obtuse homosexual I'm uptoe You're 30 years old I'm fat I'm nothing Yeah, and so, you know, your job is to pick that out. Next week I'll come back. I'll have all the, I'll study up fully on the vernacular.

Jester Gooning was in there this morning. I did have that one ready to go. I do really like that. So I go to the, I'm like, so basically it was a one day trip and it was annoying to have to pack my suit. And I'm like, what if I wear it on the plane? I've never done that. And I'm like, sure, whatever.

And so I pick it out. And then I'm like, I don't want to wear a NBA player. Yeah. And I was like, I don't want to wear it. a backpack. So I started realizing what's going through Ludwig's head. Waring a backpack makes you look like you're going to school, right? And to wear one with a suit on, like a wedding

whole get up, would look insane. So I'm like, okay. So I try to get a briefcase, which is like, they don't really make those anymore. They only do like soft cases, but I wanted like a video game, like briefcase. Those are a little more rare. I had to order one, so I'll always have it now. I'm going to start keeping shit in it. It's going to be funny. Yeah, briefcase guy in the office. Yeah, I like

that. And so I don't have a briefcase, so I'm looking. around the house and I'm like okay today's the day I grab a trash bag I put all my other clothes in it What what bag? A trash bag? No bag brand I don't know it's like the generic Kirkland oh Kirkland bag bro oh my god oh my god The target's too guys not broke

You are broke yeah I'm just saying In the baggers community Okay for trash maxers Who are injecting filth into our veins Yeah yeah yeah you are getting absolutely trash bogged. I'm getting trashmogged at the airport. You're getting trash mugged at the airport.

You're getting trash mugged at the airport by anyone. The windmaxer got a hefty mugged. So I'm walking and I'm going to the airport and I'm and dude I'm wearing a suit and carrying a trash bag around with a bunch of shit and I look insane. And I have my sunglasses on too. I walked through the security line

and this lady genuinely thought it was pit bull. She like walked and came over to see if I was Pitbull and then realized she got kind of disappointed and then she said I thought you were Pitbull. What's crazy is at the airport. There's a lot of pictures of Pitbull around two.

So she could have cross-reference. She might have two. It was so crazy. I'm like, I don't think I look similar. And so I'm walking through and I realize here is my analysis of the whole using a trash bag for your short travels

or long travels or whatever, extremely 90% performative. There is no reason to not use even if you like the bag format. It's like so funny. A canvas bag or any sort of like bag that is not a trash bag because you are putting it on the conveyor belt

feels insane. It just feels crazy. That was the moment where I was like... You can put it in the box. No, what do you mean? Well, there wasn't boxes at the airport I went to. You just put it right on the belt. That's on you.

It's on the airport. Burbank only has the little cups. Like the little bowls. Yeah, if you're in pre-check. Oh, yeah, but the... It doesn't matter. I put it on the conveyor belt. Even if you put it in the bin,

it's the same concept of like, hope it protects my bag, which is like... Did the bag break? That's the, it never broke. Oh. But that's the moment where I realize this is extremely performative

because you're like, want people to notice you have a bag, which is a trash bag. Which is usually what was in the bag? What was in the bag? What was in the bag? Clothes, a charger. Okay.

And shoes. Yep. and that's it. Yeah, so here's the deal. That's not bag material. Excuse me. I would have not have bagged this. What do you mean?

Why? What have you? You need it on your trip? What have you been putting in it when you use it? So when I'm bagging and you know this. I'm throwing in a laptop. Yeah. I'm throwing in clothes.

I said clothes. He said close. Oh, did I fit. Did he say laptop? No, he did say laptop? So, oh, or lists are different. Okay.

Can they include things that are the same? I'm just trying to understand that. Oh, they can. I'm gonna hear. This is fun. Okay, this is great. So how does the laptop influence the question? So,

what's the relationship between? Should I finish the list? I'd like for you to finish. I'm finished. And I want you to first for interrupt to you. I guess it's my fault now. A steam deck. A coat hanger.

A coat hanger. Yes, a coat hanger. Are you fucking deaf or done? Is the bag, double bag or single bag? What do you mean? Is it a double bag? Are you two trash bags and they're helping each other? That would take effort.

Why don't you've doubled? By the whole point of the trash bag. Is that it's quick and easy. Is that it's quick and easy. Easy. Okay. And dog food. You put dog food.

Maybe it's bring dog food on a trip. Why? Can I, and I want to be respectful because I understand this is like a tense moment. What is your point? These items are not fitting in a backpack. They are suitcase items.

So if I... Genuinely not true. So if I took every item you just said and fit into a backpack in front of you, would you never use a trash bag? Yeah, 100%. 100%. Next episode, I got a great opener.

Premium, I got a great opener. It is a 20 pound bag of dog food. Yams. Okay, okay, you've just upped the size of the bag. You've never said to size of that. You've never done that.

I never said the side of the bag. On what trip have you ever done that? I never set the size of the back. You can't fly with that. You can't fly with that. One of those trips of France when he was in the driving the car, he just brought dog food.

Why can't I fly with that? It's too many, it's too many, Like fucking ounces. What do you mean is too many ounces? There's too much For a backpack it is

No, for the TSA That's right Now you're fucking clocking I think you're trying to get fent So how much weight How much weight can you have In a suitcase? How much weight can you have

On a plane? That's what I'm wondering There's no limit To yes To a suitcase weight As long, it's all about size Not about weight I think they're

Oh I guess for carry on Yes Wow So this doesn't make It's again I use the trash bag The whole point of the trash bag is that you're fitting items that wouldn't fit are too cumbersome to fit in. I think I have an easier time getting the yams.

Good, great brand. Honestly, good choice. Into, I think it's yams. Isn't it YAMS? It's IAMS. IAMS? It's IAMS.

It's Yams. It's because that's what they said in the commercial. You just never heard him saying on the commercial. I love commercials and I love like when people so many. I turned off that money and I watched the commercials. Wow. What's going on with you? It's because I've nailed into the wall.

It's because we made fun of the trash bag. And I finally did it. And he just needs to admit that it's even a little bit performance. Drake Mae pisses all over himself yesterday. Slime comes at you for the trash bag. And you're crumbling. You're lashing out. Drake Mae went for $2.95 and two touchdowns.

Really can't blame the guy. Like what a performance. More yards than Sam Darnel. More touchdowns than Sam Darnel. Second. That's what I've been saying. Yeah. Second, you brought tote material.

Okay. In a trashback. Now, I was at that same wedding. Did I have a trash bag? I don't know. No, I had a tote and I put in my tote bush. Your tote what? My tote bush.

What is your... It's a bush outside of the venue where you hide something and then get it later. Am I right? Yes. We did that and smashed the record with the fireball.

It's a tote bush. See, I understand Ludwig. You guys don't know how to travel. To be clear, Ludwig also pulled up to the wedding in like tennis shoes. We covered in cat hair. I pulled up to the wedding

in Black Margello's. Morgela. Hey, Margello's. Okay, sure. And still, it was my hair. No, it wasn't. We know. It was not your hair.

It's obviously a hattable hair. It was obviously a cat. It's one of the two cats that you have. Maybe both. My most likely both. Anyway, it's performative. I think, because even if you wanted a giant bag, you could just get one that isn't a trash bag.

It is, it is genuinely to have people look at you and go that. That weird. Too handsome of a guy for a track bag. I don't want to have a trash bag. That's what they sound like. And it's insane. It's just genuinely insane. I've been doing it for seven years.

I know. You did it bad one time and all the sudden. This is like when I shaved my head bald and I was like, um, this is easy. What are you admitting that was insane as you say? Yeah, I was lying the whole time.

Well, I'm not. It was, I'm not bitch. You are because you're in, you don't know. It's like Dunning Kruger. It's not Dunning Kruger.

Dunning Kruger is us beforehand not having touched. You're, you're right here, buddy. The roller coaster's coming. Yep. because you don't know shit. I'm steadfast in this theory

and I think I think I'll be backed up in the future. Later on in the archives, they'll retcon it and they'll be like, slime was really right here. The thing is that you'd be proven right by backpack wearers. No, I would accept all ideas.

No trash maxers would ever agree with you. So, Lord, let me ask you a question, man, because that's important to me. Like, what is the argument against reusable trash bag? How come you're using a new trash bag every time? Great question, Nick. I don't, I get it. Why don't you get a reusable bag?

Why do you like the disposable? I like the shape of the trash bag. I would be okay if I, I mean, I used to use a pillow case, but I find pillowcases too restrictive. Okay, the fibers are all too tough. Yeah, like you can't, it doesn't stretch very easily. Right. So, but if there was like a, like a trash bag material.

If I could get a Santa bag, I would use that. I literally got him one of these and he didn't like it. He looked at me and was like, oh, nice try, sweetie. It was like a canvas bag. It was the same issue. Oh, where it's like a pillowcase again. Yeah,

it was like Santa's magical bag that expanded. Because Santa's back stretches and like you can see the shapes of presence from the outside. You just wish it was Santa's bag. I mean,

it doesn't have to be sandas but like the same. What if it was like latex? What if it was like a swimming cap? No, that'd be too tight. It would need to be like a nylon, like a carbon nylon.

Carbon nylon. Yeah, like a carbon. Like a mixture of carbon and nylon. Yes. Carbon nylon like steel mesh. A canvas bag gets everything you want done, but you're pretending that it doesn't. Because it's performance. A canvas bag is, it's too tough.

I get the, to be honest, I get the canvas bag thing. Because you need the, you need it to shape shift a little bit. It's not going to fit the coat hanger and in the yams. What about a different fabric that's not as as restrictive as canvas, but much more malleable, that isn't Santa's bag. That's what we're talking about actively. Right. But like, it's, that exists. and you don't want to find it. You don't care because the trash bag makes you look quirky.

You keep thinking it's about being quirked up. I, 100%. Are you being quirk chungis, love it? He's being quirk chungis in your own. I'm not being quirk chungis. Like, because otherwise, you're basically saying I've been quirk chungis for like my whole life. I am standing.

I hate to make the accusation. I hate to make the accusation. It's like we've finally come to an idea that I can understand in this whole episode. I'm glad. I'm glad we could pull you in. That you've been. I I have been quark chungis You were fucking quirk maxing

I could Yes dude If I tried to quirk chungis Like you guys wouldn't be able to handle it Like because I'm just being me But if I were to be quirk chungusing like you think I am You would fucking lose your mind What about this?

That's pretty good That is not bad It's not bad It's not bad I don't like the hands Put the hands down I really don't like the hands You can't do the hands

hands. Nope. No. That's why he's not Corchungus because he crossed the line too quickly. Just ditch the hands completely, I think. Well, you know, we gotta develop on this.

Anyway, that's my theory. I implore everyone to try and test it out at home. Try it. Use the trash bag method. And also... Hold up. If you're gonna try it,

try it when it matters. Don't try it just to try. Like, don't just put like, oh, I'm doing a day trip and I'm putting clothes in a trash bag. Like, just bring a toe in that situation. Do it when you have stuff that doesn't fit in your normal backpack, but you don't want to bring a carry-on suitcase. Okay, yeah.

I mean, I guess you're, you're heat-checking me and saying I didn't really put my money where my mouth was when it mattered. You didn't. Is there any, is it travel with the trash bag? That's exactly it. What more can be done? Because the thing is, Aiden, I was on the same trip and I didn't bag it. I toad. Did you know I was trash maxing?

No, I had no clue. I just knew it was a tote trip. Were you attending a tote-mog? I'm not tote-mogging, but he's trash-forcing a tote trip. And it doesn't make sense. He's trash-forcing a tote trip. He's trash-forcing a tote trip. And you're trying to trashmog me and doesn't make any fucking sense.

It's a utility maxed based on the items that you're- Yes. I thought he was Bushman-Maxing. I thought he was Bush-Maxing. No, no, that was a Bush-Tot. That's... Aidan, sit this one out. Aidan just watched this episode.

I'd kill myself. Yeah, I would love to hear it Because everyone last episode talked about When they last had a yuhu And there were some crazy stories Last had a yuhu, I was drinking a hell of yuh man Really? Yeah, as a kid, oh yeah, we had in the house

We had the boxed yoo in the house Your mom was so beautiful At the time and still is at the time But less beautiful But I wish I could have known her then Because there's no yuhu Yeah I didn't know her then she was beautiful

I would want that Not a time of my life I wish I didn't know. They want me to censor something here and talk about Britain or something like lighthearted, but I live in a shit hole. I'm sure she felt terrible. I didn't rub it in, though. Hold up.

Spoilers. Archie, uh, just put something over what I said that is, uh, something British and fun. Like a summer act. Lighthearted and crazy. Do they ever have sun in three weeks? There's nothing British.

He can imagine it in his head. That's all they can do. That's it. You see, I go into the imagination hall and then I look at, I look at the ceiling. and I think about the sun. I think affintasia is like a genetically

British thing. If you have any British blood, you're more likely to have affidavitia. We can't see anything in your head. You have no hope. Affantasia is nurture, not nature. I think I can undo it for anyone who has it. Okay, fiction.

I think I'm dead ass, bro. I think give me fucking, how much time do I need? Give me 48 hours with anyone affintagious or affintaging. Dude, this is Kevin Nanny's the power of touch and healing or whatever. I need,

I need, I need, I first off, it's called quantum touch. Quantum touch. Quantum touching people's advantage. I need, I need the iTunes

visualizer. Yeah. And I need a jukebox microphone. And, and I need, I need like a, like a cake from Vons. And I need like a bunch of snacks

for the weekend. It's gone. Wait, you think you get, you get it out of it. Drugless, a drugless rap experience. A drugless hip hop experience.

to make you see in your mind's eye. It's only logic in J. Cole. And it's me. I look like David Copperfield. And I'm on like a big poster at Burbank Airport. You can test this. You have a good test subject.

You do this on Zipert 2. That's all I'm saying. I don't want her to be able to see things. Oh, okay. Oh, yeah. If she could just imagine a life without me, she would run to it. Yes.

Immediately. That's smart. So we keep her dumb. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Keep her dumb. My dumbest girlfriend has it too. And she, I would. Your what girlfriend?

dumbass girlfriend. Oh. Yeah. I'm mad because she says I can't do the Jack Black voice anymore while we're like, you know, like sleeping in bed. Okay.

Okay. Oh, I thought she was just going to say you can't do it anymore. You don't got it anymore. No, it's more like in the morning or at night when we're about to go to sleep. I'll like do a lot of Jack Black voice. Give me an example.

Like I'll be here like, oh, oh, good night. Good night. See you, lady. See you, lady. See you, maybe my dreams. Sorry. Maybe we'd be dreaming together.

They let the bed bugs crawl up your ass. We need Jack Black on this show, dude. We need him badly. It would be just us fucking making a miserable. Doing him to him. So you guys gonna ask me about a movie or something? Do you be like, and I know, I feel like that hurts you because you love doing that.

Yeah, and that's, and I would never want to hurt you? And that's unfair of her. But do you feel like there's a grain of truth in what she's asking for? Not out of shot. Maybe a grain of fairness even. Brother, she can't imagine. Yeah, she can't imagine things in her head. So I am better for one.

And for two. Or maybe that's the issue. Oh my God. So she can't imagine. She thinks you're genuinely black, Jack Black. And she just gets scared. Yeah. Because her eyes are close so she can only.

Where do? That actually makes a lot of sense. She didn't say that though. What she said was, stop doing that. And I said, doing what? And she's like, the Jack Black voice. And I was like, you really want me to stop doing the Jack Black Voice? I kind of put up a fight.

You have to. I'm making a stink. And if you're not going to stand on Jack Black Voice, what will you stand on that? And she said, yes. And then she turns around. And I'm like, okay. I feel like it's one of the only quirks you have. Like, that's one of the only things that would stand out.

Otherwise, like, it's like a normal. Otherwise a really normal guy. So in the morning, so I like, I'm like, fine, we go to sleep. And in the morning, I'm like, what I mean to make you some cafe? Did a pour of? Did a pari par?

And, uh, got the harryo. She was so mad. B-60. She was like, I told you to stop. And now I have to really stop. You have to ran it in. Did you show it out on your ham photo?

Oh my God. Is it for, can you pull it up? I got bored and So I posted on the Pourover subreddit Has anyone else ever tried a slice of ham in their pour over? Yeah.

And then I put a slice of ham I did this all. I didn't like actually make the coffee. Why not? That was too much because it's too gross. But I was bored enough to, it was like a three in the morning to think that this was funny

and then posted on the subreddit. And it actually, a lot of people were kind of rolling with it but then they removed it. The moderators took it down. No, what? Yeah, dude. Dude, I thought when you first sent it to me,

I squint your eyes. It looks like the whole filter is like a slice of prosciutto. Oh, to me it looks like the skin of a man. It's like every... Yeah, I will say I arranged that it's also turkey. Someone in the comments is like, that's turkey. No, it's not. And then I replied, same thing.

Which also kind of piss people off. But there's a... apparently a circle jerk subreddit, so someone cross-posted it to there and they loved it. Everyone in your life just wants to keep you in this little box, I've noticed. I'm saying. Every time you try to break free. It's not fair. You should be Jack Black Foist drinking ham coffee every day.

But I can't be. But you can't be. Because of foids. Oh, because they think you're quirk chungessing. Yeah. Your ham coffee is my trash bag. Cage. What is J-Bos?

J-Bos. I'm having trouble. trouble navigating the colder seasons, the colder seas. Cage. Jable, that's, I, I feel so bad. My back's in pain, Cage. Jack Black, my best friend and ex-musical partner, it pains me to see you in pain like this, not having good sleep.

What am I to do, Cage? I got no other ops. No other ops for a match. No, that's not true I sleep on the only Matt shops, I got it Sorry, sorry, yeah Sorry, we're having a conversation

But what is it? That's the coffee shop Sorry, James, I know you don't like to be interrupted But I know that Helix offers 20 unique mattresses That might help with your back Are you Dave Grohl? You could, oh my God

Get that shot out of my face It's the devil. It's the devil from moving with me. Hey Jack, I'm just a big fan I love Kung Fu Panda. Thanks. I love the panda too. my pride my most prideful role i didn't like when you said those things about trump just want to reiterate

what this guy was saying helix does have a sleep quiz to find your perfect mattress which i took and they have various designs of memory foam which i use and cooling features which helps because it's a little hot where i live i want to gobble up that quiz i want to gobble it up with the fire of rack can my friend gobble up the quiz with the fire of rock with my silver fingers oh yeah he absolutely could just again really don't like what you said about don't Donald Trump, but the good news is there's sleep zones, so maybe whichever part you have, who I hope has left you for those comments. I leave the coffee stuff.

Could maybe leave? Sorry, by Dave Grohl. Foodfires suck. New person walks in the coffee. Them crooked bolters is pretty good, though. So anyway, there's sleep zones, so you could find one that fits your zone. Do you hear this jam? Where would I?

You're saying I can go to headigsleep.com slash the yard for 20% off sitewide. No, that's wrong, actually, Jack Black. and I didn't finish School of Rock, but my friends told me it was good. That's 27% off site-wide. It's 27% off-sitewide. If you go to helixsleep.com slash the yard, it's exclusive for listeners of the yard.

I don't even know what that is. And I don't know who Shohei Otani is, so you must be more famous than him. Well, thanks, thanks Helix for sponsoring this week's episode. This epi... I wasn't in a movie with Miranda Kaz. Miranda Kaz.

It couldn't help myself. I wanted to do it, too. I don't know. Go to the episode. What the fuck you're still here for? When I came in, right before we did the pod, there's that guy yelling. Did you see him?

Oh yeah, yeah. The crazy guy's back. He's back. He was saying... He said, fuck you too. And I was like, what fuck me for? Everyone gets it from this guy. But he was just hollering at nobody saying, tell your bitch to stop looking at me. Tell your bitch to stop looking at me.

And I'm looking around for whoever, bitch. And you call her up quick. No one's looking. No bitch is looking. The neighborhood's getting wild, actually. because during the State Farm stream, I rolled up, and there was a woman with the largest meth pipe

I think I've ever seen. Okay. And she was just hitting it. Just had a backpack next to her. No trash bags. Just taken rips. And her defense is one of my wheelspins. Yeah, so.

If she's conversational enough, he ends up doing meth. You can be convinced to do meth for sure. I mean, I was taking a toke. See where she's at. And then that guy, that guy, So we had a bunch of old rotting food in the fridge, and I tossed it out before the Super Bowl,

and I come back later to go, like, pick up some food for the party we were doing here. And someone had taken all of the rotting food out of the trash and then stolen our table that the mail gets put on and set it up on the street in like a buffet style. And what? And I was like, you know, if you went through all that effort,

like have at it so I left it there and then I come back later crazy guys there and he is taking each piece that's on the table and smashing it into the ground box of donuts

smashed into the wild across the street the glass bottles like he's ruining and then he folds the table and then puts it down it just leaves it on the street okay well we were gonna do that

eventually too but then me and Yingley looked at the security footage it's the same guy who set it all up. Oh my God, bro. Dude, okay. Hold up.

Hold up. Imagine you set up a feast and no one shows up, bro. You set it up a feast for Super Bowl Sunday. Yep. And you want all your homies to show up. No one shows up. I'm throwing all the fuck. It's like my grandpa, I threw a birthday,

and no one showed up and he's got the fucking green paint all over. He thought it was yogurt. Same thing, bro. Bro, that is crazy. And then last. And fucking last night, they took the mail table, right? So I'm leaving. And it's, it had gotten moved to a different part of the block.

And it's just leaning up against the wall. So I steal our mail table back. Let's go. And I go put it back. That's fair game. But, and I find out the gate, like our gate thing isn't working. So I have to leave the gate open overnight. And then I leave.

I come back this morning. They've stolen the table back. Yeah, that was an obvious one. And this time is just not set up anywhere. Like I can't search the neighborhood I can't watch the video Yeah It's a different person

That's crazy Different it's just a woman Who I've never seen before So we gotta We gotta make some sort of Maybe we do like a community feast Every week Because that's that's what we used to do

Zipper would give them like Big like What do you call it Like aluminum like trays Full of chicken tenders And we just stopped getting the chicken tenders Yeah And I think that kind of

disrupted the ecosystem and then that one mom dog started having sex with the baby dog Oh, did you get the update on that? No. Because the sun dog and the mom dog What I was falling everything? What the fuck happened? So they were incess maxing It's like you you don't know about incest maxing the incest maxing. I don't know about incest maxing Yeah, I don't know You wrote a book. Thanks yeah thanks for that There's this like these wiener, I think the Chihuahua. I think they're Chihuahua. I And there was like an older mom dog who had had a puppy at some point.

Okay. And the owners would just let the son fuck the mom. Like it, it happens. It was just happening. How do you know this? It's happening often enough and in public enough that multiple people have just seen it happen in the street. The dogs.

The dogs doing this. And how do you know it's the son? So our next door neighbor, she has been here for longer. and she had seen that the mom had puppies before. And she's like, 17 cats. And she's like, they should be incest, fucking. They should get the dog fixed. He's like, oh, oh, that's just fucked.

That's wrong. Oh, my God. You think it's a vertical or a horizontal thing I should do here? The insane update to this is, I've been seeing the dogs walk around lately. Yeah. They have some tiny chihuahuas with them. Oh, no, bro.

like three baby two new smaller baby chama and they have three teeth yeah i didn't i didn't check first off let me give you a little background on my people one generation of that's not even that big of a deal you're really got to that one you're freaking out over life the miracle that made you get here i like our neighborhood i like our neighborhood we have a a very varied interest among people here. God forbid we have somebody who like Sunday roasts and a couple dogs who like... Who are in love.

One guy sets up down the street on Sundays, I think, and he preaches. The preacher, the preacher man is pretty crazy. I've never seen the preacher man. I've seen the preacher man a lot. Preacher man's been coming around. Really annoying. Can I tell you we're lucky?

Because I agree. I feel blessed. I was in San Jose for the Super Bowl. Yeah. You don't want to be in that fucking town, bro. And Jose? Everyone's engineer maxing. Yeah, that's where dreams go to die.

And everyone's fucking sad. And watches Ludwig. Yep. So many engineers came up to me. Everything's closed at nine. Yep. Except for like three Japanese restaurant. No, we brutally mob northern California.

It's not even close. And the weather's just worse. Their nature maxing. I get that. They do have beautiful nature. And I mean this. Zero inbred dogs. and if you do one thing, do it right.

Yeah. And maybe 30X the preachers. They need more God up there for sure. Dude, megaphone preacher mans are always so funny because I think it is in a way it's actually the most direct way to talk to people about Christ

because they can't get like, they have to like do this or have headphones. The air maxes don't quite do it. I'm not doing this. I'm for, for 33 seconds, I'm listening to the good word. Yeah, what are you going to do?

Like cover your ears? Like now what do you rickered your ears? Like now what do you rickered your? vase. Like, all right, I'm going to 7-Eleven. Tell me about Job. Those guys, the schedule, I saw one of those guys, it was like, it must have been like 10 p.m. in like some random city in California, and there was just no one around. He's going. But it's dark. And I was like, I thought, I always kind of thought that part of it, like a little bit of it is like, oh, we're trying to be inflammatory. We're trying to like, you know, be in big public areas, Venice Beach. Like,

everyone's going to see us, hate us. That's part of it. Where it's a 10. But this guy's grinding by his lonely. Maybe that's why. Maybe he's grinding out like a different psalm and he doesn't want to stutter. Because at that point, everyone's laughing at you. I assume it's like being a Santa comedian. So you gotta grind local spots.

I actually had this exact thought when I was listening to him yesterday because he was stumbling a little bit. Like it's not perfect. And I was like, dude, this is the local. This is the local. Pulling up a chair. No, no, continue, dude. He used to work on the,

good word here. I'm listening. You got a lot better. You got a lot better. You used to fuck that one name up, Bethelaheiza. But you really nail it now. That was a close Psalms one too. I don't like, I think he's getting better, too.

There's less hesitation than there used to be. Dude, Yingling came up. Were you guys at the table when he did this? It was, he was pretty drunk at the wedding. And he comes up really excited. And he's like, so you know we have the mouse problem at the studio? And we're like, yes,

singing his suit. It's not like to sell something. And he was like, we need another cat. And we were like, yes, we've talked about this. And he's like, no, the cat. He wants to use coots. To kill all the mice,

like a mercer and hire coots. And he's like trying to convince Ludwig of this. Ludwig says, no, you can't afford her. It's crazy because he came over to me after this and he just lied. He just said, Luddwigs down.

We'll get Coots. That's so crazy. That's good. Because it was not even close. Just an adamant, though. I was saying all the mice would hop on Coots like a big, like ants on a big steak. And it's just fucking eat her whole. Dude, she's a warrior.

Oh, she's a warrior? Yeah. Test her out. Well, you couldn't afford her. I mean, you couldn't afford it. Can you afford her? Huh? Can you afford her?

Can I have 40? You're the one hiring her. It would be uncouth. Uncuth. shouldn't work with blood family yeah it's like yeah hiring your your nepotism son it's just bad it's just bad for business

bad form so we should probably hire like a different cat yeah why don't you just hire another cat hmm what do you mean me can we get an office cat what no why because you guys can't take care of a cat it's not I don't work here so so then why are you complaining about it because I live here it's okay so you guys

both want a cat but you won't take care of it I don't even ask me. You didn't ask me. You didn't ask. You'll take care of the cat. How many days a week? Every day of the week. It's a full-time job.

You'll be here every day of the week taking care of it? Yeah. Even weekend. Yeah, even weekends. I'll change the litter box. If you... I'll throw it. I'll throw on the wall like a chow.

If you don't... If you don't take care of it and the cat goes hungry, you have to snap the cat's neck live on the yard. I don't have to. I get to. That's the... I think... I think he's actually...

just wants to kill the cat really bad. He wants to throw it against the wall like a chow and then kill it live. I would never hurt a fucking animal. I'm just joking on this fucking stupid show man. There was that one time you said you step on like a bug that looks cute and I was like, oh my god. And I was like I had to rethink how I thought about you. It sounded like me. You did say it, but then you immediately like why would you think I would be a big set on books? We all had the fucking magnifying glass on those ants, bro. We were all there.

You were there. Of course. You were there. I was not there. I was doing that 100%. I was not there. I was trying to do it. I could never get it to work.

I would make little bad tracks. I would make little tiny magnifying glasses for them. And I'd say use it on me. Go ahead. I'm here. I would have voted for Aunt Obama twice. I three times. If I was old enough, bro.

I swear. I know we have 10 minutes left. We have 10 minutes left. But I have to, like, ish, right? I have to be so bad. Like, what are you going to do for us? We're going to do something for you? What are you going to do for us?

What are you going to do? Make a deal before you get up. Make a deal. I could film a video of me peeing holding my penis with the Jackie Chan hand. Deal, done. But you get to wash your head after. No, he doesn't.

Have fun. He's going to put his penis in the hand? Yes. I'm going to throw the whole warehouse away. What? Phone time. Phone time. He got my phone.

Sorry. Sorry. My phone title. He does have to film it. I forgot. He wanted to do that, bro. You see his eyes light up? I get,

I have to jerk myself off to completion of Jackie Jane. I put my penis in a hand-shaped object today. And boy. I have to film it this time. Do you think real Jackie Chan is somewhere just like... Getting heartburn. You feel what the hell's happening to me? He's like, why is my hand feel like I'm holding?

I'm holding like a Coke can. Wait, it feels good a little bit. Shit's huge. Jackie Chan's still in... What was the last movie he was in? He did a couple of dramatic films. Not too long ago, actually. Jackie Chan, IMDB, zipper?

The last one I watched was the Karate Kid. Oh, the new one? Oh, he... Yeah, he did the Karate Kid remorse. He looks good, man. This is... He's in a bunch... Not produced. These are all producer creds.

Yeah, go down, actor. Actor, that's upcoming. He's in a bunch, bro. He's in... He's still very sexually... legends last year, dude. That's next show. He was splinter in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Wow. He's still out here, man. What the hell is Panda Plan? No, no. It looks like an airplane game. I'll have a Plan B. Maybe my girl take Panda Plan. That shit don't even work. Dude, I, uh, so I was like

doing a bunch of cleaning this week and I found the big old t-shirt press that I used to make the Bush did 9-11 and like Atrox a pedophile whatever I put on it for the bake-off. And I found it. That's the only time I ever used it.

And it's this massive, like, iron, heavy, stupid thing. And so I was like, oh, I get rid of this. So I put it on Facebook Marketplace for free. And when you do something for free on Facebook Marketplace, your phone doesn't turn off until you throw your phone away. But anyway, I'm going through all of them, and this one guy is like, dude, this is awesome. I've been wanting to make a T-shirt business.

Can I get this? I'll be in the area at like 6 p.m. I was like, you know what, man, yeah, sure. And he comes, and the guy is like, it's like a, I gave him like Christmas to a kid. Wow. And he was so happy. So if you see, if a guy named Ramon starts making the most insane shirts of all time,

I get a piece of that. Oh, you get a piece. I mean, I should. You should, but do you negotiate that? It doesn't matter. You say, Ramon. You say, Ramon, give me a. Yeah, because then we show up to his house with,

fucking crowbars and we, Ramon, negotiation time is now. It's me, Nick and slime. I told Ramon, oh, it's actually really heavy. Do you got it? Do you got it? But what I meant was, I get 50% at very least of anything.

And he probably understood that implicitly. Yeah, he should have. Right. Yeah, I think it's fair. And I hope Ramon's business goes crazy. Dude, what if he becomes like a mogul? Like a tycoon? What if he gets billions of dollars and you don't see a penny of it

because you didn't negotiate a lot? kill him. I'd have to kill him. Ramon, sorry, man. You two would be like beautiful dads. The home alone villains if you went up to kill someone. No, we would. We love finding out

about traps first. Take a guess who's who. But we're both the brains. That wouldn't work. Take a little stab at who's who. I'm the tall guy. He's Joe Pesci. Nailed it. No, we wouldn't get home alone trap. You know what we do? We would overthink all the traps that might be in the house.

and then not end up home aloning the guy at all. You just would quit the robbery altogether. You just do something else. Yeah, you'd be like, maybe this is bad. Yeah. Let's go home. And that's, oh, hey. Was it weird?

It wasn't weird. He thought about it and then said no. Well, it can't be weird when you do it for the seventh time. Yeah. You wash the hand? He washed his hand with soap and water. Oh, W. Where's the video?

He's even a little wet from the watch. Was it just holding your cock? Where's the video? Yeah. I mean, do you guys want to say? See it? I think our live O'Reilly reaction would be pretty cool. I don't know if I can send this to Zipper and not... No, just show it on your phone.

Just play it. Just play to us. It will just look at it. I've never seen your pissing dick. I don't know how to... That looks so crazy. Dude, your thumb also being in frame. It looks like you're holding hands of another man. It looks like you're being guided on how to piss.

Dude, you have, for one, clear piss. Powerful stream. I'm really impressed by the color man. It's also a long piss. You really did have to go. You had to go bad You should post this and say my dad taught me how to pee the dog Because that would be awesome. You know how we are worried you're still peeing? It's a lot disap I don't know what you're saying you're saying you're saying we're probably stepping on some awesome I said here It's gone Oh my god. Shake the tip. Shake it a little bit.

There you go. Oh my God. Can that be our yard intro today? Shake it a little bit. And then he uses the hand to jiggle his cock and get the dribble. Maybe we can play the audio for them. No, someone will jerk off to that, bro.

So? No, it's up to him. God forbid. It's up to him. Yeah, I'll send a little. And it wasn't weird? You said it wasn't weird? Yeah, you thought about it and then definitely said to the sentence.

I think I'll be. real, I think it took me about two seconds to settle in. It was kind of nice. It was like, like I feel stable, I feel secure. Was it like someone else was holding it for real? Is it like sitting on your hand? When you beat off and...

Yeah, I mean, there's a little less warmth to it. Sure. That's the second penis he's held. But Jackie? Oh. You put your penis in it. You put yours? No. No. Jackie wouldn't sloppy seconds me? I've had Jackie for a long.

time of course. Bro, you're getting herpes. Why do you think we kept the hand? Cage. How do you think we held the hand? Cage, we have Jackie Chan's hair. Actually a fucking, like, awesome. Peace I love of myself.

Like a Macuffin object for a Jackie Chan. A Jack Black movie. It's perfect. We've got to put his hand back on the statue to reanimate it. Dude, oh my God. That's same. morning I woke up. She's like no Jack Black voice. And then an hour later, I was explaining to her.

I was like, do you know why Jack Black calls him Cage? And she's like, no. And I explained it to her while she didn't want to hear it. I don't know why she is so resistant to Jack Black, but we'll get there. I don't even feel like it's... Stop. That's not really your takeaway there. You're not... But the conclusion is it will get there. We'll get there. She has to understand eventually. I don't understand why she her problem is, but I'll fix it. I don't know if it needs to be fixed. No, actually, no comment. He's doing really well.

Fix it. How else will she change in the way I specifically want? She doesn't change into the kind of person I want without me forcing it. And what am I supposed to do? Maybe relationships are all about compromise, right? And you say, either I do it in the morning or the age. I'm being honest. I'm being completely real.

Are you speaking Chinese or English? That's, I... Sorry, I think I was just locked in from earlier. It kind of slips through sometimes. Keep doing it. He comes back from peeing with the Jackie Chan. Perfect fucking man, man. He can't be in English.

Come on, just live back now. Dude, if you saw up with Jackie Chan's mind. Oh my God. And you hate your lesbian daughter instead of your lesbian self. That little dicky song. Wow, that'd be so healing for his daughter, though. Oh my God. dude, if Jackie Chan had your mind

Does Jackie Chan hate his lesbian daughter? Famously. Famously. Famously, bro. Yeah, man, you don't know this? But not for being lesbian. It's because she does Jack Black impression all the time.

You should have thought about that before you let him touch your cock. Jackie? Yeah, that's, I mean, you consented. I let a homophobic hand touch my penis. Dude, we had the Super Bowl with my friend, Zach's gay. And then he messrs a group chat. and he's like, football's super gay.

But he accidentally messes the group chat that Christian's mom made for all of us instead of the group chat with all the boys in it. Did she LOL? All Cups? She replied, watching the Turning Point USA half-time show. No, she didn't.

No, she was not watching Kid Rock. Watching the Turning Point Half-Time show. Sorry. I was watching Erica Kirk come out like Triple H. Dude, kid rock. honestly with a dream come true to see he perform he's still got it the legend he got it more than anyone

he knew his song does anybody know if he did it Daddy cool Daddy cool yeah no he didn't he didn't play cool daddy cool it's because you know why it's because of Moses Jones still has the rights yeah it's also his old shit bad with DeBah it's just I feel like his classics would come out

you're fake demon bro I call this statutory I call them mandatory and then a kid helps him sing that That line. Isn't that crazy how that really is... It's all together. We were saying yesterday, it's like,

he doesn't leave any room for interpretation. He quickly corrects any room for air. In case, he responds to the first line with, in case you were worried, yes, that is what I meant. That's exactly what I meant. Did you see the Seahawks posted CP on Maine? Yeah. Oh my God.

It's so fucking. That's your team, by the way, bro. CP on the field. That's your team. My team might have lost, but at least they weren't tweeting out CP. They did not do that. They literally tweeted out CP. Dude, there is a clip someone posted from Potabout List and Patrick gets Caleb a hat that just says CP on it.

And I'm like, if these guys still think this is funny, that's an old clip. That makes me, oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. It says it in like college block letters and Caleb's like, this is my, this is so awesome. Everyone's going to know. I mean, it's kind of mainstream now, though. It's like, I know.

You know, you go to Potabout List, and they're talking about CP, and now the Seahawks, like, social media account. That's motion, bro. Is posing CP. Yeah, but now it's dead, bro. It's like, I don't want. And I don't know if it should have motion. Now CP's lame.

Something shouldn't have. Yeah, it fell off, of course. Yeah. Because it used to be like, fuck, yeah. I like the idea that Pot about List is sort of the crucible in which cultural ideas are formed. That in 4chan. I guess and 4chan like insult.

It's the left and the right. Yes. Left and the right. Pod by list, the left. Perpetually at war. Fortean the right. But sometimes I love. Wow.

You know? Yeah. Yeah, man. That's what we, every presidential candidate should have to be in a room hot and stinky. And Bill Clinton is a pimp.

What did Kid Rock say? You said something like that. Did he? Yeah. You watched it? I watched a little bit of it. Yeah. That's cool.

I was watching on my phone during the bad money performance of the show. I think he was like, Henry Cleans a slut or something. I can't remember exactly about it. Maybe I dreamed it. But I'm pretty sure that's what he said. Just shit slime set on the pod.

Dude, you're a bit of a menace at the wedding, by the way. Me. Yeah. Why? What do you do? He kept spinning his fucking hand towel. Oh, yeah. The hand towel bit was good.

He kept spinning a damn hand towel. He kept coming on to me on the dance floor. Did you? He's a married man. and look at him Gaffod now What happened dude? I don't even know if I could say this What happened? I don't even know if I can Grab bro's nuts and dick

I didn't even know if I can say this brother he grabbed me more than Jackie grabbed him You were you're just gonna spread lies at a wedding Do you not do the same after getting on X-you-due do you don't do what's wrong with ridden some lies You are David Schwimmer through and through in that episode bro Oh my God you are the do you are the fucking Because we were on a break, bro. You and yingling. Dude, he gets nervous.

Yingling made it. I was like, yingling. What's going on? That boy, Yingling was hammered. He was hammered. I'm getting, everybody's getting hansy with me on the dance floor.

Okay. We get hansy with you. And I'm a remarkable three employees, including him. Well, the other day was touched at Waste Thursday. Yeah. And this is... You had to touch that waste Thursday a month ago.

And let me tell you, improved morale. I'm just... I'm just, I didn't think that touch that waste Thursday would catch on and I'm realizing that it's coming at the expense of me feeling uncomfortable. Does it feel bad that chubby cattle Monday is washed and touched that waste Thursday? Chubby Cattle Monday is happening tonight without you guys. So think about that. Wait, what?

Sounds like Chubby Cattle Monday for sure. I didn't get an invite. Huh? An invite? It's Chubby Cattle Monday, it's our thing. Stacked invites this week. Who's there? It's a little too full.

We've got me in the rotation. We've got Andrew Way and the. the rotation. We got journey. And maybe my girlfriend. She's a maybe. Your girlfriend, your heart and soul,

who you're getting married to one day. Actually, she's a maybe. Now that I think about it, it's not a maybe. She did say no. Last night. So it's really.

That's cool. Yeah. So Chubby Cattle Monday lives on. Dude. Chubby Cattle Monday blows. Chubby Cattle Monday is in its like 10th season of a show that should have never been made

in the first place. You talk about me being a problem on the dance floor. Meanwhile, you're getting, you're getting crazy. Why? You, Jesse and Josh backing it up on me on the dance floor. Okay, so can I say what's happening? Yeah.

There was a back it up train. Okay. And think of a human centipede. I got you. I know what it is. I can imagine it. We're here already. But everyone's grinding.

Yep. Yeah. Now, who's the first person in this train? Mm. Got a warm machine 420. Whoever's in the back. Guess who's in the back. You can't know, the first person, you have to back it up.

So someone must back it up to be. No, I get, no, but I see. Because if you're standing there, all right, it's me. I'm like this, I'm partying, okay? And someone comes up, oh, I'm grinding on you now. And I'm now like this, right? Man, girl, boy, I don't know. I'm just enjoying my time here.

And someone's going to come up. They're not going to come behind me. They're going to go to that person. I have a question. So the person who is getting it backed up into is in control. Yes, of course. They're prime. They're grinder prime. What if that person's backing up

and the per people in front of them keep backing on to them. Well, you have to rest control from the situation. It's 3V1. And that's your bottom bitch. I was your bottom bitch and you know that. You were my bottom bitch? I was your bottom bitch off the clock. You were the first person in front of me.

And you know that. So who was backing it up into you? Got a War Machine 420? Joshy. Okay. Jump. I see. Jump.

And then Jesse gets on there. Jesse tax on. And now you're... Just letting fucking anybody grind. Come on. Does anybody join the grind train? He's the one that's letting anyone because he's running the damn train.

Wow. I'm not running the train. You're the conductor. You run a train and everybody, Ben's wedding? Yeah. I didn't run a train at Ben's wedding. He did.

A lot of people are saying it. I feel like. A lot of people ask. I feel like things are being flipped around on me right now. Oh, do you feel like maybe Sakura? Everybody's training. Maybe.

Do you feel misrepresented through some sort of approximation of what actually happened? Yeah. Fear Buck. this. Post this. It's a video of you're pissing with Jackie Chan's hand. If you hear about post this.

Homosexual woman backs it up in a wedding. I did run a train on my boss, get a warm machine 420 and Josh man. Yeah, I did at Ben's wedding. You know what? It's time I own it. They kept saying it was a beautiful wedding, but where

they met was a place called Halapeno Inferno. Every time it came up, it killed me. They're like, and when they locked eyes at the Halapeno Inferno. And I'm like, I told someone was like a Zoe 101 restaurant. Like how was that a real fucking place you guys met?

She was the host. It seemed like everyone at this wedding had worked there at some point. Like guy in the crowd was like the kitchen so small and like really hot. Like Arizona 100 is like 120. They were describing the setting of Halapeno inferno like a George Saunders

novel. It was very beautiful. Everyone's been there once. And let us know in the comments have you been a Halapeno Inferno and how you thought the food was. That's right. We're going to go into the premium where we're going to really get to the meat of this Touch That Waste Thursday debacle, which I'm sure I can solve as a non-employee. Get out there.

How to combine Touch That Waste Thursday with Chubby Cattle Monday to make them both better. Sexually harass your boss. It seems like it's fine now. So just give it a shot. Do it. Do it without questioning it. Bye.