The Yard - Ep. 246 - Responding to Comments..

Episode Date: April 15, 2026

This week, the boys talk about the Bilibili comments on the last episode, what The Yard Road Trip would look like, and how Ludwig discovered the original Fart Reverb sound effect.. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I'm crazy on the whirdle He's crazy I am I'm demonstrated Recorded to be crazy on the world You would sit there like a like a like a fucking fat sea otter I don't sit there That's mean I don't sit there I try to get the food

I don't sit there I act I act quickly You would there'd be nothing to act on bro Oh my god because the thing is I'm not afraid of failing the wordle So I fight so you're just gonna fail it really quick No I fight bravely I'll show you after this I will fucking destroy you I'm a warrior in the whirdle. Are we going?

Okay. Thank God. Thank God I got that on record. That I'm a wordal warrior. Yeah, they needed to hear that shit. Do you understand? Thank God. They needed to hear that shit.

Put an M-16 in my hand. I'm a wordal warrior. Well, we're back. We're back. Oh my God. The fractured limping freak that is the yard podcast, once again, incomplete. We just can't. We just can't get a full app.

Can't get a full normal app. It's because like us three are willing to hustle. I'm saying, bro, you know what I realized? I go on all the travel episodes. He skipped France. He skipped Japan. I've never skipped. You...

I've never skipped to travel. We kind of have to be around you, which is miserable. What? It's miserable. Yeah, I guess you don't skip them. You're the impetus. You're the sun and we're the gay little mercury that rotates you. Yeah.

Gay little mercury is one of the big ones. I'm the gaylet. Mercury's a small one. Mercury. Do you know all the planets in order? Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars. You know it. I don't give a shit.

See? That's so pathetic. That's so pathetic. I play Bellotro. Of course I know them. I don't get it. What does that have to do with Balotra? And you know what?

I don't know. I don't know. That's a dumb question. I don't know. For anyone who played Pilatro, do the second half. Saturn. Wow.

Wow. Wow. He blew it. That's crazy. You should have taken the owl. Is it? That was the It's crazy.

Zippur is the one Who fucked with me? Is it Neptune? No, that's also wrong. It's crazy. Is it Jupiter? Yes. I know it.

It's stupid. The asteroid belt, I only care about what's inside it. Right. You understand me? That makes sense. I don't care. We want to go where we can reach.

I don't care about anything else. We can reach the planet as you know. Do you think this one will go on Billy Billy, too? Should we adjust what we say? Yeah. So the Billy Billy viewers. Ludwig, Ludwig. What was your,

what was the best part of? about China. Oh, oh, awesome Ludwig. You're so worldly. Wait, please, I'm about to make a dirty joke. Please stop me. Don't threaten Sam Altman's life in the first five minutes. That'd be terrible. You guys are so, it's funny. It's not okay to joke about history unless it's about the Japanese. You guys are so weak and pathetic. It's not pathetic. You guys are getting mad at an AI-translated comment. That's a human behind that AI translate. That's a human behind a VPN. behind an AI translated comment who has developed a parissocial relationship

to you and everything you say is perfect and everything we say is bald and gay and it's just funny that you've gone through to a website that you've never gone on before this no he's not talking about Billy Billy Billy bro. They came the ball broke. Yeah I don't even say about Billy

Billy comments they can do it they want. They came over to people were so upset on the Billy Billy re-upload which is because it's in a silo so it's kind of funny to read. Okay. And then people it's like World War Z when the zombies climbed the wall. They came over on the YouTube

with VPNs and started leaving comments in Chinese on the episode. You think Chinese people are zombies? Well, whatever the subtitle says, yes, I guess. Whatever the subtitle says. You know what? Whatever the subtitle says. It's funny because they

re-uploaded all our Lemonade Stand episodes. And what we did, the Lemonade Stand trip, which we had planned separate from Lardwick Strip, was, you know, go to China, which is this place that we talk about on the show. lot and experiencing it for ourselves, try to like tour factories, universities, interview people. We brought an interpreter and these episodes get re-uploaded to Billy Billy. And people really

like them. They called me astute. And they enjoy this like foreigners interpretation of the country that they feel like is really fair. And the Billy's comments about me on The Yard episodes are that I'm a drooling American troglodyte who is. I'm a bald, I'm a bald idiotic pig. I'm a bald a historic pig. It sounds like the yard viewers are more accurate to your personality. I will say there was one exchange because I was kind of annoyed because they were coddling you and everything we said was ridiculous.

I get it. And I think when you upload a podcast of 90 minutes translated to another platform without any cultural social texture at all, obviously it's going to look insane. It makes sense why it's. But there was one guy he's like, oh, so you think it's okay to take, joke about Hong Kong, Japan taking back what's theirs. And it's like, well, I mean, and then he asked, would you joke about 9-11?

I was like, we have joked about 9-11 more times than we've done many things. And then he said, oh, would it be okay? And this is all translated in Chinese. You're talking to this guy? In comments. In comments. They have no phone conversation.

Are you pre-translating years? No, I'm playing in English. Okay. Because he's, yeah. And he's applying the translation. He's applying in Mandarin? Yes. To be fair, it works really well.

And he says, he says, okay, so what if I said that the people that died in 9-11 were roasted golden brown like ducks? This is all in the comments last episode. And I said, you know what, brother? I wish I would have thought of that. I wish I would have thought of a Chinese man commenting that about 9-11. You're doing my job for me. I'm on this like two days later reading it in the comments. And I was like, damn, I wish, he's doing my job.

Yeah. And then he said, I think. we, I think I've misunderstood you or something like that. He broke bread with me. He wrote, what I thought was funny was he wrote, you won in English and then wrote the rest of it in Chinese.

And then he said, you're still a shit interviewer because he thinks we're interviewing you because you're not on the show. I spent three weeks just trying to unite the Chinese and the Americans and in one day you guys are taking it all down. What are you talking about? I bonded with that guy.

I went on a cultural excursion. I made hours of pro-Chinese content. You basically just got a Chinese guy to say that everyone who died in 9-11 deserved it. That's what you did. But then we talked about how his analogy was insane and then we bonded over that. He did bond. You bonded, but

that's what... Hey, oh, I'm sorry, does the journey of a thousand Chinese of diplomats not start with one step? Okay. You know? You have to start with one guy. And you have read and you have read up. With one guy. I actually realize this. This is, because

is the weird, the weird Ludwig. Because what also appeared from this, which surprised me, like the last episode popped off because it's the end of the tip to tip episode, right? And people, I think, want to see something that sort of caps off the trip. It's getting recommended to people

who watch tip to tip. And you, a bunch of, this is not the Chinese commenters. There's like a weird subsect of English tip to tip phase that came into the comments and are mad, that the interview that we invited you on is so bad.

That we invited you and conducted. And it was, which is fine. If that was your expectation, it's fine that the episode would be upsetting to you. So I asked one of them because I almost couldn't believe it. I was like, I mean that you're both in the comments. I mean,

I wanted to know. This was, this was an excursion. This was an excursion. I was nice to this person. We're in a four wheeler, bro. I said, could you explain to me? It's like, are you genuine,

am I misunderstanding? Did you genuinely not know that Ludwig is, a static host on this show. Like, did you think we invited him on to interview him about tip to tip? He was like, yeah, that's just what I thought it was. That was a bigger cohort than I even understood

could exist. I think, well, you guys are misunderstanding, because you both are coming at it from the angle of like these weird tip-to-tip viewers, I think you're now just being exposed to just this gross abomination that we have made. Well, this

podcast, which requires like 200 episodes of referential knowledge to be able to dive into that's a think of what it takes to appreciate one piece dude yes

but that's the greatest story ever told and this is four guys talking about coming anyway they were caught no I was so I was so annoyed

because they're comments being like you see how the bald one tried to they always come with the bald one it's funny I'm like okay you click

you click auto translate on the comment and it translates into the bald one yeah okay can it What should they call? No, I, hey, no offend.

What is he? He's the gay one. I'm not kidding. Yeah. Oh, is he? Yeah, I'm the gay one. Are you actually the gay one? Yeah, like in a couple.

What's he? Glasses? Nerd. Yeah. They called him nerd. So you see how this immediate pressure. But so, but they would say they literally like, Mudwick is so emotionally intelligent.

I just put on a gay, a nerd and a bald. Yeah. And that's, yeah, you came on our gay nerds. And I came on the gay nerd bald podcasts. He's so emotionally intelligent. Look how the bald one tried to make a dude. dirty joke and Ludwig redirected the conversation. I'm like, he fucking, he fucking threatened

Sam all my life in the first five minutes. He did that. He talked about minor attraction. People just said what we did. There was a couple people who were like, he was like these insensitive jokes about the Ayatola. Oh my God. And I was like, Ludwig made a joke about the Ayatollah being assassinated two episodes ago. He was in Atoka.

It was a bad joke, I got punished for it. They would never gain my favor. It was anyway, I thought about this. I thought about this. This is all part of a grand this is fine. Yeah. Because Ludwig,

Ludwig, while he receives... You guys don't seem bothered. Hmm? I'm not fucking bothered. No, this is... It's fucking bother at all.

When you said, it's fine, I believe it. It's fucking fine. This is the way, that I'm pulling it all together. Because even though Ludwig experiences the pedestal sometimes,

where he's put on, he's put on the pedestal. Because people are, people are more familiar with him and they want to protect him. They spent 18 days with him and Michael. They spent 18 days with him and Michael, and that's magical.

And tip to tip was a magical experience. I don't like that. But what is the trade-off? You experienced the lowest lows. The tens of thousands of people posting Hassan with holding you as his dog and... You're saying he deserves a little bit of cake. Yeah, yeah.

I realize that this has to bring balance to the ecosystem. We can't eat... I can't eat this cake. We need to feel this. I can't get fucking cake. Because he gets sent to the rock bottom. I get let's up those numbers for nine months. I can't get a little bit of cake.

That's what I'm saying. He deserves a little bit of fucking cake. He deserves some Chinese cake. When it drops that you were in fucking 40 V-Tuber DMs, bro, you're going down again. Oh, my God, bro. You're going down again. Fuck, bro, is it so bad? You just want a little goddamn pussy?

They were all banging. What about you? I don't think it's so bad. They all, Aiden, they straight up with all V-tubers have banging fucking bodies, too, bro. What's that about? Bro. I don't want to. No,

I think I should say something because obviously people come to me. Yeah. The psychunophiles dropped. And you were like the second most tag person on Twitter after psychuno. Because you made fun of him three years ago saying he does diaper play. Which didn't leak. No.

I'll say this. I think it's annoying because when someone you don't like, you don't like their content, they do something bad and you're like, I always knew it. I think that's actually wrong. It's a wrong feeling to think. It's also wrong to go to the guy who was making fun of his personality. Justifiably, I think.

And then being like, you were on to something. I was like, no, I was just being mean and I thought it was funny. That is it. And to conflate those two, I think is annoying. I would hate for somebody to be like slime new all along and then ignore the scatter shot of the last five years. I got a lot of wrongs in there. I'd hate for that to be to be.

Remember what he said he wanted to kill calling in Samir? Because he thought they were iced coffee hour podcast. I still get confused. Yeah. I still forget. It's different. Just different. It's too different guys.

Don't even look remotely similar, I'd argue. But if they end up doing some sort of crazy exit scam and move to Andorra, they're going to tag me again. They will tag you. Yeah, they will. And I'll say the same thing. Hey, I'm just making surface level accusations that are funny and somewhat rooted in my feelings. And that's it. But I will say this.

if that doc draw, and it's also bad to be like, yes, he went down for anything, because usually someone got hurt on the other end, even though this is like, I would argue is not the, on this most serious end of the spectrum of things that we do usually see. But I will say, if that document had diaper play in it, I mean, I'm, I'm going on a helipad on a skyscraper. I'll say, thank God it wasn't. I think it's good for us all. they're a pussy. But yeah. What are you supposed to do?

You guys a lot of pussy. Just got a little pussy. I don't always shot by Kroger's. What are you supposed do shot at Kroger at home? Sometimes I go around.

Sometimes I go to Rouse. For some pussy. There's some Puss. You never been to an Alversons for a bit of Puss? It's not

Kroger's pussy. So I die. I don't trust your meat selection I'm fucking same bro I don't fucking same bro I don't go to the grocery store for puss everyone goes to the grocery store

for a bit of god damn pus it isn't so wrong should we fucking shoot him like a dog of the street what we fucking do we put him for a thousand years or what you want

should we take him out like he's a fucking Iatole just fucking blow the shit off smooth fucking house again. Shoot him dead because you want to push. Is that it? Don't you want?

Is that what the lemonade sand faction says? Yeah, yeah. Lock him up. Lod him up. Tired of shit. I'll tell you what. As soon as you offend, lock you up. And they all are banging bodies too, bro.

What was that about? Anyway, that's current events. Yeah. Man, that was Wow, it's going to be back. It's going to be somewhat back. Wow.

It's going to be somewhat bad. Yeah. What do you fucking miss about us, bro? So that's your full statement, by the way. I'm just because a lot of you will come. There's going to be like a bookmark. You'll say Sycuno and people are going to be like, oh, what's something? That's your.

All of it from the beginning and then the end part that we just experienced. And I hope that covers all of your questions. Don't ever complete making fun of somebody and prescience of wrongdoing. That's my big message. here. And don't come to me like I'm going to pet you on the head because I hate you already. I hate it. And don't go to Ralph's for... I'm going to Rouse for... You go Rolf in some day. You go Rolf in. Produc.

Don't just go to Rouse. And go to where you can for some days. Bounce around. Call them beforehand, see if they're open. It's a free market, boy. Like, man, here, I have a palatable, translatable question for Ludwig. Okay. How do you feel now that you're back from your long trip? because you see it, we did D&D on Saturday night

and I appreciate you were an all-star but you did seem a little tired. You've had a... Oh yeah, well, no, my schedule's just been fucked because Swift. Yeah, so Swiss and Chowell right now. That dog. That poor bear?

So we came back from China and it was instantly Disney Week and I went for two days. Then I do two days of Disney Week. Then I go to Miami for the Red Bull Player Summit. Oh yeah. You did Disney before that? Yeah. Sure boy. No, I've been

back to back and the Red Bull Players, so the Red Bull Player Summit was it was cool. Dude, I had to leave though because Swift the last thing I was supposed to do was learn how to kickflip from Ryan Shackler and I said no, Ryan. That was at this thing? Yeah, that was at

this thing. Was it like filmed or streamed? It was just filmed. I think it was like Red Bull crew there. Okay. Ryan Shetler on? But the, yeah, basically the last day of Disney week. I wasn't there for this. Swift was at the hotel with us and then just randomly

starts dragging that back leg. He just stopped using it all together. And then they did an x-ray and it's not broken and they haven't done an MRI because he had to put him under for an MRI and they don't know if they want to do that because he's old as hell.

But yeah, he's gotten better. But I, there's some shit wrong because I feel his right foot and it's cold and his left foot's warm. Oh no. That can't be a good sign. That's terrible. That sounds like a bad sign.

Oh, Swift. Dog duty on top of going to Miami right after China is insane. We actually talked about flying to Miami to do the D&D episodes that we needed to do. You could have handled the smoke, dude. The will of the group collapsed at the suggestion. Nobody wanted to do it.

No, that's not true. I am always, you see me in the group chat? I'm like, I'll fucking do it. Never missed a travel up. He never missed a travel up. I have this great, when it comes to travel, I get a crazy look at my eyes. I'm like, I'll fucking do it.

Yeah, that's the only time he has a crazy look. He's outside of that really... He's actually really adjusted even keel. But when it comes to the traveling, that's when he gets weird. It's crazy shit. I'm just saying I'm usually down. It's like, Nick's like,

I really don't want to get off the plane and do a podcast episode. I'm in there be like, I'll fucking do it. I want to stay in my house and take fucking big dumps in my humid bathroom. I want to take really sweaty, thick dumps in the air. shit my bathroom crazy and re-comments on Billy Billy that are translated directly to English.

Nick, Nick shares that he is food poisoning the group chat. Everybody instantly, you pooping? Yeah, we all started investigating it, asking him about it. Walk us through it.

Was he not being a little haughty? He's being a little annoyed about it. Yes, I'm pooping. Yeah, I guess I was pooping. Correct to the above assumption. It's like,

why would I not want to know? If you're going to miss the podcast, surely you can tell me the details. You're asking if it's humid. And he's like, He's like, it is humid. And it's like, okay, well, you don't have to have an attitude. Right.

Just asking if it's humid in the bathroom. I want to imagine it. What you're doing right now. It was Chipotle. It was Chipotle. So maybe something wrong with the meat. Maybe. Dude, that's the one thing I'll say about the Chinese commenters is the food.

What? You said it with some stank. What? You said it in a way that if I said it, I think people would be mad at me. I yeah well okay though I was just reading through some of the billy-billy comments and the Chinese commenters had this like is it comment too that doesn't translate it's ah it's just gonna say the beloved the beloved in Chinese you're reading through some of the billy-billy comments well they're not all billy-billy it's the Chinese commenters and something they they kept fighting about

was the food poisoning how so there's like two warring factions and it went on for multiple episodes of comments. One faction was like, this, this is food poisoning. You got three for 10 bread. You're going to get food poisoning. That's so cheap. Interesting. Even I would fucking be astonished at that price. Okay. That's, that's half. The other half is like not food poisoning. Not food poisoning. It's altitude sickness because you've been driving motorcycles in the rain and you, and it made you get altitude sickness and then you threw up. And it, fucking, I kept reading it getting mad. He's like, what do you fucking mean? What do you mean?

We both drove motorcycles in the rain, got sick from it, and then it threw up within five minutes of each other. Just fucking perfectly synced altitude sickness. Period. Period. And I'm shooting out my ass crazy. Yeah. And it's just from, it's from cold? That's so, from cold weather?

It's presumptuous, isn't it? Ludwig. Well, I think, I think what it is is I think there's a sensitivity, which is understandable about some negative stereotypes, about China that they want to dispel. They don't want a foreigner to come to China and be like, yeah, the food here is shit. It fucking makes you shit out your ass. It's bad for you.

And then leave because they're like, it's actually not that bad. It's actually good. We have a high safety stand. You know what I mean? Sure, yeah. It does seem like a gargantuan amount of cope. But I don't blame them.

But it's like, there has to be this moment where you look inside yourself and be like, you know, maybe it was fucking food poisoning. What can you fucking do? And it's like, bro, we get food poisoning. here. We're going to

right here. Human-ass bathroom that air is thick right now. He's kidding. He can't even eat Chippole with his weak throat.

Imagine when we were in Beijing and I take a picture of it Beijing, how yeah. See, I feel like I wouldn't be allowed to do that.

I can say that. I can say that. Ashweger can say whatever he wants. Whoa. Hold up. Maybe not that. See,

I don't know. Now, now I don't. What are you talking about? Maybe not that. That's not. That's why you can't get a break.

I don't know if that's right okay let's say I'm in Beijing when we were in Beijing I take a picture and it's it looks like the fucking apocalypse in the air obviously we said it was a bad day it was like a fire there was an actual fire going on and I post that I'm like look at the fucking air here

that would feel like shit if I were a Chinese person yeah no we work really hard because you'd be misrepresenting it and it was fires but I think if you're shit now you're fucking ass in your butt and it's wet can you not share that can you not be honest Should I be quiet about it?

Do you shut the hell up about it? I don't think you should. Do I fucking put two between? Should you goat, Michael, in the hotel room? Maybe. Did that, didn't film it. The brown stained goat? Done, done, done, done, done.

Did it. Did it. You know what I did find out while we were there. It's like there, some of the city tourism boards or like, it is apparently pretty easy for foreign influencers to get money to show off the country. right now. And I was like, shit, I'm not getting paid. Really? We should have got a fucking bag. I want to say some crazy shit. The only time I've ever been offered by a tourism board is Puerto Rico. Oh, really? Puerto Rico offered like, it was something like 50K, but it was like you have to get

2,000 people to go to Puerto Rico. I'm like, what? I could maybe, I don't even think I could pay 2,000 people the, like it wouldn't cover. Has speed gone to Puerto Rico? I don't think so. I don't think he's on Puerto Rico. I don't think he's on Mexico either. Dude, there was this moment. I don't watch speed. I only watch clips when he's traveling. He's only watch clavicular. I only watch clavicular mostly pretty much constantly second monitor content. Um,

but you know, I'll pop in some speed shit every now and there was this clip where he forgot to turn off his stream and he's just like eating at his computer very quietly. And I was like, this is always a window into a soul that I've, that you never really get to see. He's like quietly eating just like at his computer just like

fucking scrolling. Yeah. And I'm like, oh my God, his energy is so normal. Yeah, as opposed to like, if the camera's still on, he's going, Ronaldo! Yeah, doing 60 backflips and shooting machine gun. No, it's actually the same. Wow, it's crazy. Not even a little different.

You made me think about the food safety thing. You're getting sick there. It's funny. So you do get mad at comments like us. You feel it in your bones sometimes. Yeah, but I'm just like, I'm just like, oh, they're done. Um, yeah. And that's, I mean, like, there's dumb people in China.

There's, there's, we're on a, we're on a, we're on a spectrum of engagement. That's for sure. A what? Of engaging. We're on a spectrum of engagement. Spectrum. What? I think he's marrying an autistic person.

That's beautiful. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, it kind of surprised me because the food was like, one of my favorite parts while we were there. We ate so much good food, like, all over the country. And then interviewing this one woman. We asked everybody what they thought, like, the biggest problems for China are. Or, like, what, you know, what's coming up that China is going to have to deal with? And this woman said... Lung cancer.

Lung cancer. Number one problem for sure. What? Really? Number one. Dude, they smoke so much. They smoke like Dan Tienney's. Lung cancer and traffic accidents got to be going crazy there, man.

There's so many traffic accidents. It's crazy. It's one thing they're doing worse than us is the traffic for sure. have an accident and us. Do you, do, uh,

you know when Nixon made the seatbelt law, people really didn't like that. Yeah, I know. I wonder if there was maybe the same blowback. Dude, there was the same thing I saw this video.

I mean, we talked about it is the drunk driving. Do we talk about that? When they added it in the UK, the, the, the breathalizer test. No.

There's this video of this, them adding the breathalizer in the UK and this reporter going around being like, now, if you're over the limit, now, you're going to go to jail. And the guy's like,

it's bollocks. I'm fine to drive I know I know me I'm going to drive And it's the same guy Where it's like the lads drinking 70 pints In the backyard

Just throwing up Like fucking like stand by me When they're eating the pies Wait you didn't finish your story Although the one woman She said the number one Or One of the two biggest problems in China

Is the food safety Oh really? Yeah She said that food safety in China Is overall pretty bad and she thinks it needs to be approved. I do like walking into a spot anywhere in Los Angeles

and there's a big A on the fucking sign. A plus. I'm feeling good. And sometimes it's a B and I'm like, B's pretty good. I mean, that's just one woman's opinion too. I didn't get sick from food while I was there. It was fucking amazing the whole time.

Yeah, mostly didn't get sick. But the last time I went to Catalina Island, I'll shit my brains out on the ferry back. Y'all get some food poisoning. Y'all got weak shit. How many times have you gotten it? Food poisoning? Lifetime.

I don't. I don't think I know I don't think I've ever like puked from food poisoning and I thought that's what food poisoning was for a long time Oh yeah I mean I think it's like a sliding scale right

Yeah on Deerid twice my whole life Yeah I think I'm at like five If it happens a lot there's a problem I think the only time I'm for sure of Is in Mexico City that one time Oh right it was horrific It was Aiden in the it's like a curious George book Aiden in the search for the bathroom

Yeah, it was... And your girlfriend's the man in the yellow hat. Stepping into some mom and pop juice juice store and be like, can I please use your bathroom? It's bonyo time. It's tip to sip, but you're not asking for directions. You're asking to shit. You do shit to shit.

And if you have to get food poisoning in the beginning. You have to do the whole trip with food poisoning. You're not allowed to progress unless you get food poisoning for something in that town. Yeah, you guys are just eating like, you're like sprinkling like, I don't know, mold on eggs or something. It's shit to shit. Eventually farming food poisoning.

Yes, bro. This is a good idea. There must be like an agent, like a poison. That I think it's got to be like natural E. coli. You know what I'm saying? I think a little bit of poop. Like let you, I just laxatives, right? Shit to shit.

Sure. I guess it's, it's just, it's just making you shit and it's not all the sickness in the Yeah, yeah. You gotta have like, you'd have to have items or powers along the way. Like, you can activate your smooth moves tea in this city if it's really tough to find something. So it's basically jet lag, but it's, it's, you're shitting crazy.

Yeah, let's, this is a good idea. Yeah, I'll call Sam. I'll call Sam. You're not calling them. Oh, right now? Just calling it. Because it's such a,

because it's such a good idea. Otherwise it's a Jakey Bake situation and he never gets it, never gets the message. I don't think I got it. I don't think I got it. Call Sam Wendover. Sam, Siri. Call Wendover Productions.

What's wrong? It came up with California. over easy productions. Okay. That's close. Sort of egg. You're hiding them for me. I'm hiding them from you.

Damn it! It doesn't never work! You threw that phone down like pretty angrily. What's up, dude? What's going on? I'm upset. About what?

My whole business communication system just isn't working. Wow. That seems really frustrating. It's crazy. Because you're unemployed. So I don't know what the... I'm not unemployed anymore.

He's trying to start a small business, dude. I started a small business, dude. I started a small business. company that produces it's called a pocket ass a pocket ass yeah wow and you take it in your manufacturing and i'm manufacturing distributing i'm doing everything

i'm doing everything i always these vendors and have these customers this is an intriguing product so a lot of people must be trying to contact you about the pocket ass so many people i would love to call you about the pocket ass i would love to receive that call by my i mean i prefer i prefer texts or maybe what i only do google mail cause. There's so many ways. There's so many ways. I'm so overwhelmed. How am I going to make money? How am I going to get pocket asses out to the masses? You could get quo spelled QUO. That's the smarter way to run your business communication. What? Well, to sell your pocket ass and communicate with your customers in a better way, it'll consolidate all the different calls, text, voicemails, and transcripts all in one place in a single

clean view. Is this real? Yeah, that's real, bro. It's called Quo, QUO. It has more than 90,000 businesses with like different sized teams in the businesses. Most, Most of the 90,000 also sell pocket asses. This sounds like a God said it, because we have all skin tones. Mm-hmm. How many? Of the pocket asses.

So many. That's the part of the appeal. That's the why I started this company because all the pocket asses I would ever use and use and use and use and use. You have like a Shrek's color one? Yeah, like a green. I'm going to call you.

I'm going to call you after this. No. I mean, you could try, you could try Quo for free plus 20%. off your first six months when you go to quo.com slash the yard. That's QUO.com slash the yard. Quo, no miss calls, no miss customers. I think my business is saved and you guys were doing this. You can have any skin tone you want. I'll buy a billion. Back to the episode. Michael's kind of guy who would be down, I think, too. He'd be like shit to

shit. Yeah, sure. I don't know. He's actually like a germophoob. No. He doesn't like germs. Interesting. But maybe shitting's not germs to him. I don't know. We should. Yeah, I think it's something to ask him later on. Michael is shitting germs. And he'd be like, no, no, no, no, no. Not germs. Shitting's not germs. Now, he hands sannie's before every, every meal.

Really? He's a hand sannie boy. And you still got sick. Yeah, well, you can't hand sannie the food that you put in your body. Do a little... You know when you wash the berries or the lettuce? I think this is how my mom taught me to clean my foreskin. This is the fucking berries and the lettuce.

She called the berries. and lettuce. Yeah, she'd clean the berries and the lettuce. The berries and the lettuce? Did you take it to you strets? You must, uh, get the smeg as if you all right berries. Don't short it to smeg.

I'm sure there's a French word for it. I'm sure there's like seven. Zipperc, can you look up the French word for smegma? And then I want it in Chinese as a crap. I will want both here. They're not circumcised in China, right? Surely. Yeah, probably not.

That's an uncirk nation. They're like God intended. Like God intended? Like God intended? intended they keep the peat. A god-fearing nation of uncirced citizens. I appreciate that. I appreciate and respect that. Because honestly, man, imagine you go like most of your life, like a long, like 20 years of your life and then you see a surced penis. You must think something happened to it. That's what I'm saying. You must be like it was an accident. I got it like, oh,

shit. Why is it, why is it exposed? I don't know. I got an insane DM about this one time. Surked penises? It was a, yeah, it was about, um, Uh, how like I've gone somebody being like, I got my entire life, like only seen, you know, only seen unsurped penises and only hooking up with people who have uncirked penises. And then I saw one for the first time and I thought they were ill. And you thought they were gross and drooping? Okay, okay. Uh, bao pea, gao. Gao. Bao pee, go. Go. Is it go dog? Yeah, I don't know.

I got that dog dick. All right, give me French. Just type French in the... Yeah, that works. Les Megma. It's a borrowed word, really. It's a cognate. It's Lechmgma.

It's a cognate. Son, we get the Lechlema. Dude, you know what it was going through my head the other day I was just driving? It was so funny. It was when you were talking about your mom and Peter and she was saying something like going to five guys

and your mom is just like who is these five guys? When do we eat? And I'm like, shit, bro. Shit, bro. I hope he's not dead in China right now fucking on the side of the road. Just a corpse, bro.

Came close to death once. Did I tell you about that? Was it on the cam you had? No. That one was a guy almost hit me. I didn't come close to death. Michael was really close to dying legitimately. Driving.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. We were driving and we were behind like a trucker. And so I passed. And I passed on the right because there's like a pretty big shoulder. And then he goes to pass on the right. And he's sort of like halfway through passing. But while that's happening, there's a car oncoming that's passing another car. So they're too wide right now. And so this trucker sees the two wide. So he starts veering to the shoulder to let the two wide pass. He doesn't see Michael on the right. He doesn't see Michael on the right. So then Michael has to veer further under the shoulder. And then the shoulder eventually ends into just like a little drainage ravine. Like it's just an instant fall off, you know, one foot down water ravine. And he there's like, it goes from shoulder to like like laid down concrete brick.

And he's on the brick. Are you on like 60? kilometers. No, we do miles here. Oh, no, we're going less. Okay. I don't, we almost never went 60. We're going like maybe 45. Really? Even on the big ass, long ass roads? The very, very last day, we took the highway and that day we're going like 70, 80. Wait, why were you allowed to take the highway at the end? Because that highway wasn't banned. So like most highways have a sign that say no motorcycles. And, you? And, you know, we even try to go on a highway before they turned us away. This highway allows motorcycles. Oh. And we saw actually a bunch of motorcycle drivers on it. So we know that going in.

We thought all highways were banned. Was Michael shook? Or was he like, what happened? He was shook, bro. The whole next day, he's like, I don't pass on the right. Oh, my God. I don't pass on the right. I'll pass on the left.

It's scary. I was thinking I was like, I was watching you talk about what, you know, you're asking chat, like, what's the next one, tip three tip, right? And you're like fielding all these, these countries. And I asked you a question in chat, which you for some reason refused to answer. I asked him, which population now experiencing both do you enjoy more?

The Japanese or the Chinese. Please answer immediately. And he didn't. Chinese. Oh. Well, there you go. I didn't see it. My bad. Easy one.

No, he just said, hi, slime. And they ignored it. Next. But I was like, I was like, I want to be, I want to do this. I want to do something like this. And I was like, I couldn't ride a bike. It's too scary. I don't want to go out like that.

I think, wait, why? It's a good way to die. I'd rather go out in a shootout. James Dean? Why? Like a, like a last stand. Yeah, it's like everybody kind of picks one of those two options.

It's a motorcycle or it's last stand shootout through by cop. In China, they apparently also have lung cancer, never heard of it. I want to die by getting smoked out by cops. Smoked out, like weed? Yeah, I got smoked out by cops. Like this shit was that loud, you died?

Died on the spot. costs for so fucking money with their shit. Yeah, they had some like confiscated crazy weed with a Rick and Morty sticker on the bag. Death by smoke. You smoke the flour and you just die in the hotbox and the squad car. I don't know who died by motorcycle.

James Dean, I guess is the big one. Oh, that's right. Yeah. Well, I mean, yeah, probably like people's family members too. Oh, yeah. It's like humans. Humans have died. Yeah, yeah.

I'm trying to think of once I can name, though. You said you felt a little sense of jealousy watching the journey. You want to go on a journey with Ludwig? Yeah, I mean, I think... Are you fucking jealous? Because I'm like, this looks so fun. You look so fun.

You get to hang out all day. You get to riff, because your guys' riffs were great. When you were talking about moving creamily, cream-based plays... I was like, this is so fun. And obviously, I'm enjoying it in the way a viewer would. But I'm also somewhat your friend, so I'm like, ooh, I can see myself

in that situation. In the rain. He's somewhat. He's in the range of stranger to friend. Yeah. I'm in the range. Yeah, he's making friend-based players. Yeah.

I'm in the married spectrum. Yeah. But yeah, but then I was like, I couldn't do the bike. But then I was like, I had this idea, bro. I was like,

it's like me and Zique and it's tip to tip California, but it's in my RAV4 because we're scared of bikes. And it's also not tipped. It's like just side to side. And we're like, and it's like,

we're just sitting there like, what kind of adventures are we gonna fucking go on? gonna be so cool. And we stopped by like a Denny's. Yeah. And like speak to the waiter like really slowly

and like pointed shit. And it'd be like egg. A egg, please. The trip's over in like three days on the I five. It's just, bro, it's not even the five

because it's just from left to right. We just hit Nevada. We go to like Zizzix road. Yeah. It's the 15th to Barstow. Did you finish at like a diner? It's a one day trip. And then at the end

we're like high fiving and fucking like hugging. fucking Blythe, California. Let's try their world famous jerky. Yeah, and we get to Blythe and there's like that huge gas station and we're like, fuck, dude. And we're just like, we're hugging. We're like crying because it's over because it's like such a magical. Here's what we should do, okay, man.

We do a yard road trip. Yard road trip. And we have to, we got to make it. We got to make it across America. Shit to shit. We got to make it across America. But, you know, you're thinking out, you know English. Okay, can't speak English.

We have to all learn America. can sign language and see if we can get across. It would just be a, it would be who finds the closest like deaf person. No, I think it'd just be us writing shit down on paper. That's cheating. Okay, yeah, we can't write either. We can't write. Okay, we pretend we're four foreigners.

I'm the Chinese one. You're Spanish. Yeah, yeah, we all choose a nationality to be. What was you, Swedish? Swedish. I'll go Swedish. And Nick would be. A non-offending.

French person. A not offending French. Yeah, and he only knows how to say Les Megma and Ice Bell. Les Magmael. And yeah, we only listen to Durand, Duran the whole way. Yeah, it's hard. It's hard because it's just not learning the language is so much more funny.

That's the whole draw. Yeah, if you know English, it's actually really easy. We can also reach it. That's why going to Europe would be kind of bunk because you could just read the signs. I mean, it depends. Oh, I guess you could read the signs true. You're all cogniz. Latin-based languages. I think Eastern Europe would be tight for the next one.

Eastern Europe. Yeah. Are there any conflicts in there? What about the Donbass region? Is it chill? It's fine. Okay. You got the Paul 86 podcast.

I don't keep up. I stopped to listen to the news about that whole thing a while ago. You've moved on. So I moved on. Okay. So I'm sure if I don't listen to anything about it, I'm sure it can't be that bad. It's Wednesday. And now if for your Israeli business plans Monday.com

I'm Michael Babaro Michael Babaro. I'm Michael Barbaro. I'm Michael Barbaro. I just like J.D. Vance also report to Benjamin Netanyahu every day. I'm Michael Babaro. Is it wrong to get some pus? You took mine. You took mine. It's Wednesday. Today we're going to be talking about a live streamer and is it wrong to just always want some damn pus? Here's a clip from that streamer. I got some pussy in the house. Dude. I'm Michael Babarro.

We're gonna go on a bro. We'll be right back. Oh, man. I have a list of that fucking podcast is so long. It has been a while. Yeah. Probably listens that shit since COVID-19. I just replaced it.

I replaced it with William Spaniel. He's a war analyst. It's more interesting. And he's not bought out. Baseball. You're playing with baseball. I played baseball. I gave my season tickets today.

Bayball. Really? Dude, I found out I've been wasting so much money. Not getting the season tickets. Yeah, because if you get season tickets, you get retail costs for World Series games. Oh. And I bought resale price. I spent.

That is a bet that they will make it to the World Series, though, right? I don't, I'm not trying to be offensive. It's not, it's not offensive. Just look up, just look up MLB standings. Just look it up. And like, it's, it's disgusting how good they are. Like, there's a bit of shame in enjoying the Dodgers. Go to National League.

Because they're just so nasty with it. Yeah, they're just, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they have the most, they have more wins than any other team in baseball right now. How far's you think you throw baseball? Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Dude.

45 miles an hour. 105. 105. What? What? Or you try to fill next juice and I hit, I hit probably 100 too. I think I'm going to play baseball I think that's probably on the

high end too 105 you think's on the high end? No, 45 45 miles an hour 45. I think you throw 45 easy You are underestimating your face. I don't know what it feels. I don't know I've never measured this. I don't think you could throw 30. That's, I, are you being mean?

Okay, okay, you know what? Mr. Pinchey Dulliers, how fast could you throw a ball? Come on now. Got an injury on my index finger before that or after? After the injuries healed. You're 100%. Not 100. Do you see that?

Okay. Doesn't make a full connection. Really? Okay. Well, you know what you have to play with that because that's real life. So where do we land? What is it? I do 50s.

50s? 50s? 50s? Yeah. Doesn't sound high. 50s. Not bad. I'd probably crush a JV high school team.

I got fucking, I got some shit to expose. Shit to expose? Yeah. I discovered something yesterday. What? I'll tell you after. Later? After the pod?

After, no, during the pot. I won't talk to you after the podcast. Just go in the middle. Go look up fart reverb. What? Look up fart reverb and play the sound. What? Just look up fart reverb, then play the sound.

Am I asking for too much? Yeah, just do what he says, man. Play it louder again. One more time. 0.75 speed again, zipper. Just do what he says, bro. It's not worth it, bro. I'll send my audience of Chinese netizens after you.

Okay. Now look up sex in the city, fart. Oh. I think I've discovered the source. Pause. Don't play it yet. I think I've discovered the source of the. of the fart reverb sound effect

and I need some real scientists to break this down for me. This is like an H-bomber guy video. We were watching Sex in the City last night and I heard this fart and just bear in mind it's going to be no reverb here because obviously the fart with reverb

has reverb. It does. Right. Of course. But I think this is the fart if you want to play now. To stop avoiding the situation and take the grown-up approach complete and utter denial.

So context, she farted in morning. I remember this episode. Yeah. You want to go to Saturday? Sure. That's Mr. Big. That is big. Oh, get me some more ducks.

Oh, get it out of point seven. I was going to say. They're talking like they're on fucking four bars of Xanax. Can you have to stop and see the Renoir. He put a whoopee cush? Okay. okay this sound pause pause pause

is that not it it could be well this sound itself is in a lot of cartoons I can write it's like the Wilhelm scream of farts so you think they just pulled Wilhelm scream a k a.k.a. fart noise in that it came from sex in the city no yeah this guy's not come from sex in the city this was

this is probably from like cartoons before this this is the one that's on the stock Hollywood can you fucking do something can you get off fucking ass and make a video saying the history of the reverb part? You figure it out. You know what? You might have put me on the path. Do some fucking research bro. Like do some shit. You're playing

Street Fighter. What are you? 1400? I hit 1600. I am a high master. He's high master. Oh my God. Dude, I was doing, I was doing some recon for you. I was watching Tyler play. Yeah. His fucking modern guy. He's really bad. He, he might watch us too. Look. I think he's really bad.

He's, okay, I know I'm only 1600. It's hard to get there. I have 400 hours in the game. That's what it took me. Plus five characters to master. So I'm a little bit, I know a little bit what I'm talking about. He doesn't play the game, understanding the systems that he's working in. And he plays modern guile.

And he was, he dropped down to like 1360. That's like super low. I think, I think the thing with Tyler is he's a grinder. He is a disgusting player. Like I watch him and he plays disgusting. Yes, bro. He play, like he, for context, I'm doing a show match against Tyler. in Street Fighter at Evo,

which a bunch of the FGC Twitter got mad about. Yeah, they were just mad that you guys were doing that. And it's like, what are they supposed to spend the half milon? It went to a good cause. Yeah, when the MBS himself comes down in his white little dress and he says Ludwig, Tyler, here's 250K each. And they actually, they offered to tour the oil facility. They said, come to Saudi Aramcoe and walk around to see the resource

They said, Tyler, it's state-owned. Isn't that interesting? It's... It's... Oh, agenda. So, yeah. But I was telling a little bit, I was like... I just did some recal.

I watched Tyler play. I'm kind of a hater in there because he plays modern guile, but he also fails so much at it. He plays gross. Like, he plays like this... I mean, I guess you're supposed to just own with Kyle, but, like, I feel like the way he does it

is he just sits back and he does whatever his fucking uppercut is anytime they jump ever. That's... That's the... modern experience because you don't have to do an input. It's modern and Street Fighter the melee analogy would be like

let's say you want to do laser turn around up tilt with Falco. All you would really need to do is press the jump button and then the Falco would just do it for you. It's like there's zumpers kind of. Or let's say this. Let's say you hit a shine with Falco like you clip them with a shine if you just kept hitting B

he would do the pillar combo itself. You don't have to do anything else. So people who play modern they're like mentally weak and worse people? I look. I mean, I've never played street fire. I've never played the new street fire. The hatred for modern is very real among classic players. I don't think it's that big of a deal. I think it's good for people like Tyler to be able to play. You're just weaker than other people. They've balanced it a bit in the sense that you do less damage. Yes, you do less damage. You do less damage. You don't have access to moves. Yeah. Right. So, but anyway, I'm watching and I'm like, and I'm like, you could beat this guy in a week, I think, at his current skill level. Because I don't doubt that Tyler will grind. I don't. I don't doubt that Tyler will grind. find his ass off. Yeah, he's gonna get better. And here's the deal

but I'm Platt. What do you? In Strait Fire? What does that mean to you? Are you saying is it like on Platt? Hold on league or in Street Fire? In street fire. Which is kind of a meeting this rank.

It's like horrible. It's like yeah. The thing about every rank before Master is you can't go down really. It's like you can only fucking go up. Yeah, you can get to Master with like a 6% to 40% It's just a question of have you played the game for more than

50 hours or not and I haven't. However, my argument from my my fucking 400 raw ranked hours and more in training mode is that if you did this, if you focus on this one matchup, just straight up this one matchup. Yeah, just guile. Yeah, and your Honda or whatever. I think you do it. And my E Honda, my Edward Honda does it. I'm excited. I'm excited because I think you can do it if you apply yourself.

And if you don't, you're going to suffer the wrath of modern guile and want to throw your controller at the fucking wall. Well, that's what I'm wondering is, are you going to, because. one time you did that money match against Noah J in Smash Ultimate for a lot of money. Yeah, $20,000. But you, I mean, if we're being honest, you just didn't prepare at all. No, it wasn't worth the $20,000 to play it. No, no. But now it's a Saudi Ramco money.

And now it's half a mill, half a mill prize pool, plus the private tour by MBS. Yeah, yeah. So it's like, if you lose, it's like, it doesn't matter. You get all of that anyway. Half a mill or a dinner with MBS. actually said, I think in the meeting, because I was in there, I've been like talking to, talking to the Evo guys with you. In the meeting, they said, well, you could put this 500K towards like grassroots events across the country or you could just split it between you and Tyler. And I think it's

like, well, we decided to split. Probably just split it. Because you decided to split it. What's one more local? Yeah. Oops. What does that mean? You know everyone played in line. Everyone puts online that's going to help anyone. He's a rollback neck code. It's not going to help anyone. It's going to help anyone. We need it. Anyway, when you, when you're ready to learn, you come to me and I'll teach you the systems of the game and then when you're finished with those you go to Mike Ross because he plays the Honda

you have him teach you Honda? Yeah. I miss his streams bro. He used to stream like four in the morning just playing E Honda and he would arbitrarily turn his camera off because I think, I don't know he could get butt ass naked or something

but they were great. They're great fucking shit. Mike Ross, please keep streaming. I miss you. I miss you being butt ass naked on E Honda. So are you going to practice? Are you going to get butt ass naked in practice for this event?

Yeah, I just have too much shit to do, man. I know you got to do. I think I got to blow off the CS event is what it is. What's that? We have a CS event at the end of the month and...

Oh, like you can't practice for that. Yeah, I'll just be ass. At the CSF. Evo's not for a while, blood. It's kind of, it's in June, right? Yeah, but you could train for all of May. It could be May training month. You know what?

The problem was street fighting games, dude, Tyler, I see it was Super 2. You boot up Street Fighter, your viewership gets cleaved in half. You can't stream it. No one likes watching it. You can't stream it, bro. It's only schizophrenic people and people that like you no matter what.

When I was streaming it, I had to delete my vods because I would get so mad at people being like, huh, Ken has a cool purple costume. It's like, I don't talk to you. I don't talk to you. You're just here for no reason. I just want the schizophrenic freaks. Yeah, I was, I was deleting every vod. Are you the guy who likes to like catalog things?

These were, you had to be there type of shit. The cataloging rules. Type shit. You don't know about the catalog amendment. I would also go into the custom room and talk to these, have conversations with these people. Yeah. It's just not worth documenting.

So again, remember, we're on a spectrum. The three of us, it's like, I'm somewhere in the middle. You're on the bottom. I'm on the bot. He's on top. He's on top. Hey, you're on top. That's all you need to know.

You're on top. And you're on top. And I get some damp, huh? Is shit. Evo threw that in there. and you're both married men so it didn't go anywhere we say we say eva you can hold the put I'll take the cash hold it double it and give it to the next guy

so are you gonna fucking practice yeah I'm gonna practice yes I think you should but you don't want to practice CS I know you're a busy guy I'm bro video games are just fucking like now that I've seen the world dude it's like I fucking kill yourself bro I went to the same country I was there for three weeks. Yeah, but like you weren't there.

Like I was there, bro. Like, I was there talking to the people. I'm sorry. No, you didn't. Look, he's a piece of shit and insufferable. He's kind of got you. What you did, what you did, bro, is you talked to a phone and that phone talked to a person. No, think about that shit, bro.

We had a person. We had a person. That's even worse. So then you talk to that person the whole time. You didn't even talk to the fucking, because you don't even know what the actual conversation was. you know what it was filtered. You don't know what it's like to go into a gas station and say something and they look at you like this.

And their eyes are like miss a lot. I have to. What the fuck? The one clip, your eyes look crazy. It's crazy. Your eyes look crazy. I don't think it's real.

I don't think it's real. You don't look like that right now. You don't. Do you see what I mean? It has somebody had to have edited that. You don't look like that. It's like, it's like, it's like all the. editors, I think they've for the longest time have been just slightly changing it.

That's what I'm saying. That's insane. That can't be a real screenshot. It's unbelievably insane. The thing is like I look at it and it doesn't look edited. Like I'm trying to see the edit. That's what I'm saying. That that that frame. That's crazy. That frame. That can't be. It's polite. It's polite. I want you to imagine like he's like a Mr. Potato Head. Somebody's put the bottom eye in the mouse. They've seen the clip.

I will say my grandparents are cousins. Maybe that has a factor in that. Did they love each other? Very much. So much that they had sex and children. Awesome. Many times. Some people do that and don't love each other.

Yeah. True. That's so cool. They had four though. Four. A lot of kids. Wow. That's so beautiful, man.

Yeah. They're not that bad, dude. I get fucking shit on my fucking editors. It's a comeback here. You guys make fun of me for being fucking celebrity in China. No, I made funny for having squishy triceps. And me and Christian made funny for that. I'm bulking.

I cut. So I was 205 pounds. I've lost 30 pounds since. That is unbelievable. That's crazy, actually. I hit 174. I lost weight in China, actually. What's your mile at right now, you think?

How fast could I run a mile? Gun to your head. Gun to your ass. Gun to your balls. Seven, something? Seven and change. disgusting liar. Is it disgusting liar? You think I'm low?

You think I'd be higher? Obviously you'd be higher. Under a sub eight? Yeah, easily. Out of nowhere. Genuinely. Easily. $10,000. Are you sure? Because I will take it. Wait, that's, this is crazy. I'll just get the $10,000. Can I take that?

I'm talking to Ludwig. Can I get a take A for running sub 8? We're not talking to you. How about this? $100. Cut the money? I run a sub A. you come to my place I want a little bit of that for real you want you run a submate you run past the ticker tape doing this all the confetti and shit

I go home right away I'm not showering you got the run sweat on the run sweat and it's dried up and my skin's like sticky skin and I got to come over you got to come over from a cultural experience Cooke.

Coulcour experiences went to first time about fucking getting I think this is a good deal as my lawyer can you pay attention

to this deal that's happening right now I don't know what to fucking do any lawyer I he runs a sub

a go over he's all sweaty stick and he's getting him some pussy yeah that's fine that's fine you can

yeah put her there yeah that's so ridiculous Archie can you put in the clip unfiltered of Aiden

jerking slime's fake penis. What are you talking about? What does that have to do with anything? Like he's easy. He's like, oh my friend's talking about fucking my friend. It's like, dude, you're, you stroked him raw. It was crazy. No. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, what are you squeamish now? I didn't do anything. Oh, that's so graphic. What are you talking about getting, uh, put in the fucking clip, dude, uncensored. That's different right now, Archie. That's different. I was, I was coerced. Now put it there too. I was coerced. Oh, you were a coerced. By, by, by by electrodes. Back, back to your wall, back to the wall.

Just putting on Nick's chair on repeat till the end of the episode. Where did it go? Is it still in the house a little bit? Your cat. The fake cat. My fucking cat. You fucking cat. Go socks.

I got a fake cat. I've rewatched that. I haven't rewatched episodes in a while and I rewatch that one almost in full. I was like crying laughing. That's great. I'm glad the games of favor pleasured you. Yeah, it pleasured me. I'm glad the games of favor.

Even though it was in pain for so much of it. And they were successful for everyone. But the medallion was mine. My cock can be yours. No. No. Gay meda... No, I can't do this.

Can't do this. It's all that gas. He's all that gas, bro. Dude, I started... I started writing again. I've been very motivated, and my vocabulary is so fucked up. It's just all the Twitter, like,

gooning has just, like... I'll try to write a sentence in the way I like to, and I just don't have access It's like they're grayed out, like, little locks on the words that I usually like to choose. And it all has to do with just, I think, reading Twitter like eight hours a day. She mugged him. She mugged him.

He wanted some pussy. She said no. She mogged him. Yeah. He was maxing. I had this realization, I think, last year, where I just used the word insane all the time to describe everything. I need, and I was like, I need a new word. It's a fun word.

I can't, I, I, it fits so well in so many places. Yeah, you were good at, you were good at nailing it, I think. I think that I, that is a word I've, I've heard you say a lot and I enjoy when you say it. But I, I feel like I need to branch out. What's your word? I have noticed, I finally, I've, I've had a year, I've a year of reading again under my belt. That's zanely. That's instantly.

A year? That's not the point. That is zany. I'm not, it's, I don't think it's, amazing. I can't even think of a synonym to follow up. That's how fuck I am. It's not Zaney. Um, that's turpidicious then. That's that's that's. Fuck you guys. I don't have it, bro. You don't have shit. I'm God, there's nothing here. It's great. It's all mush. It's all chia seed pudding. It doesn't matter. I believe you can run under sub eight. Reading does sharpen you up. You're perfect, your perfect representation of the Chinese story.

What? The distributor failed. Oh. That's not again. Oh my God. Dude, you freak out like this except for the last time you did like a few minutes ago.

I'm just so busy. My business is booming. I got this new system of messaging and stuff. But the problem is the distributor? I have so many problems. I can't even, I can't even eat. What?

Your problems? You don't have time to eat? I don't have time to eat. I can't have a healthy meal. It's all messed up. My schedule is so thick. Do you have 15 minutes? or less in your day that you could squeeze something in?

Yeah, I guess I could. I mean, the whole pocket-ass distribution network chain, the supply chain, straight to whormoose stuff. Let me tell you, I've had the same problem because I've been going through every skin color and it takes up my whole day. Yeah, right. Because there's so many. There's so many.

There's so many shades. There's so many shades. It's like a shade of eggshell. It's like a shade of maroon. I spent the whole day doing that. It's crazy. And I only have 15 minutes. So what I do, because I'm trying to stay fit.

I lost 30 pounds is I eat hungry root. Hungry root. Yeah, that's right. What the fuck is that? Well, Hungry Root is a company that when we do their ad reads, we get to their name probably about five minutes into the ad read. Okay. That's cool.

And they also do high quality nutritious food. And I'm telling you over a thousand different grocery items in these apps. And I'll be real. I personalize my recs because I like smoothies. I don't like sweets. Okay. And I like meats. This is what I like.

I like all the things he likes. Can I just get what he gets? Well, yeah, you can, man. You can just pick whatever you want. Every meal is ready in 15 minutes or less. What about a little honey garlic beef in Jasmine Rice? Yeah, hold on. This is important.

Yeah, sorry. Thank God you're done with your call. I was going to add on another flavor I like. I think it's the street corn. Is it the street? Go back. It's the street corn cowboy tacos. Mine's actually the terriarchy chicken and broccoli bowl.

I keep a sim. I can have cowboy tacos. Oh, my God. There's going to be a lifesaver. I can finally get the supply chains connected. Okay. For a limited time off, you can get 40% off your first box,

plus get a free item in every box for life. Go to hungaryroot.com slash the yard and use code the yard. That's hungry root.com slash the yard, code the yard to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life. What if you made a deal with Hungry Route and then that free item could be one of the butts?

Hello, Hungry Root. Come on, you call him a... I've got an offer. HungryRood.com slash the yard Code the Yard for the busiest of businessmen. Oh my God, the straight. It's open again. Let's get back to the episode.

When's the last time you read a damn book? I'm reading a book right now. What book? It's called the golden robberies to Chinese book. Is it in Chinese? No, it's in English. It's written by a guy who moved to China. He was basically me, but 80 years before my time.

He's like a British guy moved to China, lived all of his life in China. And he wrote a series of like murder mysteries, basically. Did he have a shorter, more intelligent friend? Kind of a compliment to him. I think he was like a bald guy around him. Oh, really? Yeah, a gay guy and a nerd. He was like, them four.

They wouldn't let him speak. Yeah. The whole book is in them interrupting him. They had horrible takes. You wouldn't want to hear them. And then I'm reading John Green's book about tuberculosis. Did he get it?

No. He just wrote like a book about the history of tuberculosis. That's just so fake. Don't write a book if you don't have it. It's so gross. What a gross writer. We all ripping on John four. John Green, he's a fake.

He's a fucking fake because he wrote about tuberculosis and doesn't have it. Yes. And he never had. it and he doesn't know what it's like. Why you're from my boy J.G like that? J.G. We go way back. Oh really? You and went where? Have you met? I've met John, yes.

Did you know? When did you meet J.G? I went to his, he invited me to the premiere of his movie. Oh, you're right. Was Hank there? You're right. Oh, yeah. Was dad there? Yeah, but I don't think I talked to Hank there. I just talked to John. See, these are the high highs. These are the high highs that Ludwig gets to experience. Fucking

celebrity. Yeah. Walking in a fucking premiere. Dude, there was a screen show. I think it was the Billy Billy comments again and somebody is laying out like they're explaining who all the hosts on lemonade stand are and they're like Atrioc like worked as the global head of marketing at Nvidia.

Doug, you know, top end engineer at EA worked there for a long time before he started this podcast. Aiden, Ludwig's friend. The big three. What did the accomplishment Aiden Master in Slippy

and also worked at Smash G.G. Before it was Star Gigi. Aiden, don't park on the grass several years. It would be nice to see that on Billy, Billy. It would be nice to see Don't Park in the Grassland. We're cliche to break out performance.

Dude, I was walking. I was running. I run a lot now. So I'm a running guy. Oh, that's why you're mad about the subway. He's doing two miles a day. I'm trying to get fucking. I'm trying to get 40-year-old guy Jack.

The thing is you don't run fast enough. Well, I start to, I have to ramp up because I haven't ran in a while. That's what I'm, oh, why not? Because I've been lazy. That's why I got fat. I was playing bala-or eating peanut butter. What the fuck are we doing?

Yeah, okay. So, but now I eat less and I run more. I'm trying to get, I'm going to be 836 at the end of this month, which is crazy. And then four years I'll be 40. And so I want to be like jacked 40. Like old guy 40, like the kind of like. Like Iron Man.

Like you look fucking good, but like it's saggy still. Like everything's still, gravity does its job. What do you mean still, bro? You've ran like eight miles total. What are you talking about? What'd you think would happen? No, I'm talking about when I'm 40. Talking about when he's 40.

When I turn 40, I'm gonna be, after he's run all that time. I thought he was like, why am I still saggy now? I'm gonna be saggy jacked. You can't get rid of sag without surgery, which I'm not interested in jail. Wait, I don't think you would have saggy. No, but there's some sag. I don't think you're gonna, you guys are gonna hit it.

I promise. You're gonna hit 30. 3334, it's going to start pulling down. It's not going to start pulling down. Okay, you're right. You're going to be, wait, you're going to just be toned for the rest of your life. I'm going to keep your type. Because you're taking clavicular peptides.

Yeah? No cheese on your burger. No cheese on my burger. Because it's scary because it'll kill you. Why, what? I keep it tight. That's why I doesn't eat the peptides. Wait, peptides make you die from cheese?

Some of them, I don't know how it works. That guy's got a crazy life. But, so that's my goal. I want to be jacked for it. Oh my God. Dude, I film myself. You have a goal? No.

can I give you one? Sure. I'll do an Ironman with you when you're 40. An Ironman? But you'll be younger. You'll be five years younger than me. Yeah, I'm just saying I'll do it with you like in a support way, not in like a fucking all-racy way.

Okay. You do it with me? Yeah. I can't swim. So we can't do it. That's, yeah, that would be part of the journey over the next four years is learning how to swim.

I don't want to do that. Okay. Marathon? Okay. Bitch. Oh my God, bitch. Cap it out a marathon.

Let's do a marathon. There we go. Cap it out of a marathon. marathon. Dude, I was watching myself. I hit the bag too. And I'm like, let's, I've never watched myself do that. I'm like, all right, let's film myself. And when I'm throwing punches and doing combos and moving, I feel like I'm in tech and I feel amazing. Yeah. And I watched video back, I don't have any speed. Can I see it? No. Please. Please. We can watch it later. Just show you. I'm not showing them. I won't show that. Yeah, just let us watch it. Let's be into. You're going to be really mean to me.

Why would I do this? No, we're not. Why would I do this if you're going to be meeting? You can't even stop yourself from fucking smiling and laughing right now. Show us the fucking clip because we're friends. We're not going to fucking show them. We're not going to. I'm sad.

I'm sad because you won't show me. You're so sad. Do you understand why I don't want to do this? I'm crying because you won't show me. Aw. I'm going to just prove myself right because you guys are going to be insane to me. And there's that word again. He came in.

You're thinking about it. No. You're thinking about it. You can't stop laughing. I'm thinking about it. I'm thinking about how Ludwig's grandparents were cousins. First cousins. The closest relationship.

Oh my God, I deleted it because I was embarrassed. It's in your recently. No. It is. Am I recently deleted? I have to find it. Crash? How do you find recently deleted?

I don't delete anything. Bupa. Bupa. Bap, but, but, bu, bu, but, but, but, Oh, the new UI looks pretty good. I haven't seen it. Come me. Jome.

Come me. I have to get it, dude. It takes a second. Show it. Show it. Show it down. Show it to me, Rachel. It takes just like a second.

In Ohio, show it to me, Rachel. Don't turn on the sound. You promise you won't. You promise you won't. We can't listen to sound. I won't. Okay, we're watching the video. No sound, no sound, no sound.

No sound. It's so funny. still got Shake's face on the bag. It's just set up. It's a bag. It looks beautiful out. It's a beautiful. It's a beautiful. Yeah, it is pretty. Shakes on the bag. He's punched Jake. I'm not very fast. It's fine. I'm not very fast. I feel like you were, you were talking this up. Like, I was expecting you to be shirtless looking like a heaving mess. Yeah. And just fucking swinging at the bag crazy. You look fine. This is pretty normal. You look. You just look like a guy who's training for boxing.

Do you think you have boxing dysmorphia? I think you're just, yeah. I think you have maybe dis. I don't think you have to make it boxing. I think you just, dismorecure you. I think it's just dismore because that doesn't look fast. But when I'm, when I'm doing it, I feel like I could kill anybody. Yeah, I'm like, it's not like, but like, but like, it just looks like a guy training boxing. I think this is like a normal, this is all above board. This is such a nice thing that happened to this. I mean, I thought, I thought you were going to be cruel. Honestly, I was, horrible people. I'm sad. I'm, I'm disappointed because I don't. It's like, you didn't give me the material I needed to be me. I'm so slow. I mean, yeah, you're like somewhat slow, but like, I think it's fine. Like, it's normal. I've seen footage of people that speed. That's what people look like when I look at, like, we went to the boxing gym a couple times and that's what beginners, like, you know, non-professionals look like at the boxing. They look like that. Can we just spar? Yeah. You guys, you know me. We're not on the same way class. Everybody. You too. That's insane. He's on the same way class. I'm lighter than both of you. What are you at? I'm like a 165. Actually, that would be immoral to spar him.

We're in the same weight class. You're 10 pounds more than me. I'm 9 pounds. 10? I'm going to come down and wait and I'm going to spar you guys. Yeah. I'm gaining weight right now so I can

spar you. I'm going to 190. That's going to be higher than I am. Yeah. I don't want to reach that. I'll meet you on the way up. Yeah, you can catch me on the way.

You can go on the way and out. This is the smallest Ludwig's been for the entire time I've known you. Yeah. Because I think you didn't, at first, you were losing maybe a little bit of fat. Yeah.

You're losing a little bit of bad. It's because Michael took it all out of them. But then I think you haven't, this is also probably the least I've seen you work out in your life and I can assume you've lost a little bit of mus.

Yeah, for sure. On the triceps, absolutely. It's very squishy. We talked about it. I got squishy tries now. Yeah. Yeah, well, I was like, I want to do a handstand pushups

and I just started doing calisthenics and now I just do fucking handstand pushups in my room. It's like your skin is filled with honey. Very disgusting. Dude, I was walking. So anyway, I'm walking. I'm running. You've lost all this way and he's no winning.

It's like, you're just... If I want to win, I go to fuck you Billy Pilly with you. Celebrate. Just fucking... Everybody, I'm back, bro! Go to Billy. The wise traveled observer who represents the great nation of China and its history and such. In such a balanced

and eloquent way. Is it an emotionally intelligent traveler? and traveling. He comes to YouTube where they make fun of his honey triceps and he doesn't like it. And they're not. They're stone, bro. I'm running and I'm walking back because I ran a fast mile instead of the

two because you try to push yourself. So I'm like walking back and then there's this guy walking on the sidewalk my way and he's got like really bright red hair and it's in pig tails. And he's like this tall he looked very unique. Wendy's core? It was kind of

a Wendy's core, but he was like, he was a guy, uh, and he's walking. And I'm like, I wish I had hair like that, bro, and I say that to him. And he just stops. He's like, are you slime? It was crazy. Yeah. Like near my house. It's crazy. And then I'm like, yeah, yeah. And he's like, I was just watching tip to tip. And I was like, it's good, huh? He's like, yeah. All right, see ya. So shout-outs that fucking. That fucker. Shout-outs that fucker. Shout-outs that fucker. Dude, I was last night at Masayoshi Takanika concert. Do you guys know?

I've heard some of his music. There's a universe he's hit your YouTube recommended. Yeah. I don't know. He doesn't do video game music. No, he does like just regular music. I don't know what genre music. Like Japanese rock, Japanese pop. Yeah, I wouldn't call pop.

I know it's like it's mostly just orchestral guitar. Oh. But anyway, he's like this 73-year-old Japanese dude. Had a great career in Japan. You know, like a successful artist, did it for 30 years, whatever. Dropped his like best of album in 2006. And then randomly like 10 years ago, starts kind of just hitting the YouTube algo.

I think like... I think there was a wave of older Japanese artists that got picked up heavy. Kind of the like, stay with me. Yeah. You know, like around that time here. Plastic Love. There was a time where the algorithm only fed you plastic love.

In the same time, there's like plastic love created like an offshoot. So it's like, yeah, you might end up with stay with me or you might end up with Monsioshi. It's like houses in Harry Potter. Your sorting house. It's your sorting house in Harry Potter. Dude, what the fuck was that? I'm a millennial. I'm a fun millennial.

I'm a fun millennial. It's like Harry Potter. I wish Kamala would have won and he beat the orange man. know. Guess I'm going to Canada. Harry, I get into it. So,

all right, yeah. So, yeah, he went to the Harry Potter concert. He went to the Harry Potter concert. But it's crazy because this guy's 73. Like his fans in Japan are like 60,

70 year olds. And then he tried a concert last year. Actually, at the Wiltern where you did a streamer awards. And it went so well that he, he's doing his first ever world tour at 73. Whoa. Like he's never performed.

outside Japan before this. And it was like packed. You want to talk about some buzz? That bus is going to get crazy. Dude, no, because his band is a bunch of his old fucking homies. Like the guy, the guy on drums, his name's Miyazaki,

this dude's 80. That's so sick, though. That guy looks like a clean 80. Why don't we do that? When all this bullshit's done, bro, let's tour and just play music. I'm saying,

well, crazy. You have to sell out. The yard finally goes on tour. But it's music. It's music. And also at a time when the podcast is the least popular. It's ever.

Yeah. Our fans will be 60 like us. The thing is, he had an awesome gig. If I could be him at 73, be great. Because he was, he was like,

you know, like you have Sabrina Carpenter has a foil who's like, has a fucking crazy set and cars on stage and whatever and like basically a live music video. He had, um,

like, you know, those birthday, that was one of his big gags. Oh. And then another wild. Wild. They got a little wild and it'd be like

they brought out a chair with wheels and Christmas lights and he'd sit on the chair and then people would be like, yeah. Dude, it reminds me of at the old PM house in fucking Fullerton. Did you ever go to the PM tournaments? No, it was before your time.

I forget what it was, the balcony. I'm stupid. It was the balcony and it was just this trap house just filled with PM players, smashers and it was iconic at the time. And one of these tournament days, in the garage was a band and they were playing a pumpkin hill

from Sonic Adventure Battle 2. And it was an amazing set. It was terrible. They like played very terribly but it's like we got live fucking music bro. Can't be mad. It was really sick and that is what I am a magic. Like a chair with wheels and Christmas lights

sounds like one of the things that would have... What we had at the live music at the balcony. Yes. Yeah, except there's like 5,000 people there and it was like it was sold out fucking standing room, every, every spot's packed. And I knew the audience was this normal audience because they were all just also the same demographic

as, like, Ludwig viewers. Like, so many people came up to me. And they were like, dude, just watched you to do what the fuck? Because I'm also there with Michael. Oh, wow, yeah. And they're like, what? They're always together. Like in the movie.

Yeah, that's what they must have thought. It's just the way I imagine. What I didn't realize is I put a lot of people on, Masioshi. They were like, dude, you showed me this guy. And I was like, I've been listening to it for a while, but I was like, how? And he's like, there was a clip of you. Actually, it was QD talking about you guys having sex.

And then this was the song that you'd play during sex. What? I forgot. Like six years ago, there was a clip that QD had. Maybe I'll whine about her or some shit, but he was talking about how, yeah, I would play music when we would have sex. And it was literally Mascioshi, the conica because I thought it was a nice vibe. Oh, my God. Tell me if I'm wrong, by the way.

Can you just play Belizea Pula, B-E-L-E-Z-A, P-U-L-A? And just tell me if when I run my sub-8, we shouldn't throw this on. When I come over after you finish your sub-ate, you- Fellas, fellas, is this a bad song again? Is there a bad song, lay down some puss? Dude, it's got the, from like, from like Austin Powers. You can't be serious. It's the kind of music that at any moment,

you think like Yoshi's gonna go, bamp, bum. Yeah, it's the kind of music where you jump on Yoshi and then drums are introduced into the song. Wait, go to the very start. This is seven minutes long? Yeah, and it's literally this. There's a guitar solo, but it's this for mostly seven minutes.

Ooh. No, he shreds. Oh, you're hitting a different now. The funny thing is like he's 73 and he walks like a 73 year old. Like he would walk across a stage and it'd be like, you know, man hands behind the back kind of walk. Yeah, yeah. Like the shuffle. Yeah. But then when he was shredding because he would do his solos,

it was like those fingers were 30 again. He fucking, he could play that shit. That's sick, bro. He could play that shit. Dude, Josh Man, I think it was. He was saying that like, when he has sex, every time he busts,

he has a song in his head and usually it's DJ got us falling in love. Baby tonight. Yeah. What part of it? I think it's at the, so dance, dance, like it's the last part. That's the worst part of the song.

No, that's the best part. The best part is, because baby, tonight. No, no, no,

you got it wrong. Because everything leads up to the, go dance, dance, like, because that's like the, that's the reason

why you listen. That's the reason why we paid the price to get here. Pay the chords. No, it's a chords. Not, die,

die, don't get, it's too staccato for me. It doesn't matter if it's staccato because you're lost in the moment where you're danced

because baby tonight because that's like starting it up but that's like no that doesn't start it up that comes after how it should be well it starts with usher usher but I'm saying that you go to the dance dance into the fucking

baby to and that's the part where you get to release your soul you go baby tonight and that's like the top of the mountain right when you come down to the roller coaster so dance dance like and you're like think about this a moment if you were

You're an idiot, by the way. If you were to come while listening to this music, you think you're coming in the prior where it goes, and dance, dance, like it's, da, da, da. Yes. No, that's the part where you're, that's, that's where you're, that's, that's, that's stroke. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, bro.

Stroke, stroke, it's, it's the, it's the rollercoachers. No, that's, that's, that's, all of that, that's, that's stroke. Is, stroke. That's true. I disagree. And then the part, and then the part where you go down is, in baby tonight. And then you fucking. No, that.

That's when you're pumping the best. Oh my God. No, no, real. I'm fucking serious. No, that's when you're doing W. Epic strokes. Who am I supposed to listen to? It's like this guy on my,

on the left or the guy on the right who learned what back shots were two years ago. I don't want to hear this shit. You're always bringing this up. It's like the Hassan 9-11 thing. This is what, when slime gets picked up by CNN. This is what they're complaining about.

They're just going to keep bringing this shit up. This man didn't know what back shots were. It just doesn't use 30s. How can we trust them? How can we trust them? Is Kate Baldwin have a crush on her for 10 years watching the news? And she's like, so you didn't know what back shots were. What's that about?

Oh my God, Kate, don't do this to me. Come on. I, but I'm just, I think I'm right. I think I'm right. Vote on your phones. What part of DJ got us falling in love is the part that is the part where you're going to It's obviously, baby tonight. It's obviously.

Yep. There we go. It's not the best part of the song. It's like if I wouldn't be picking this song if I had to pick a song but now that we're here and I have to pick the path it's obviously. I'd love to see you make love.

Really? That would pay. We'll run a sub eight. So much. You'll get everything. I want to watch you. I want to be a cuck in a situation. Do you like watching them make love

would be like watching them run? No. Why you'd be so cruel for? That's cruel. You saw me on the bag. You said it was normal looking. That's cruel, bro. I'm going to punch you in this.

stomach, you see how normal it is. I'm saying that's two, there's two paths. There's two paths. I'm, normal sex, some normal sex, guys.

If you show me, if you show me your sex tape, it's either gonna be you hitting the bag, and I'm like, oh, that's great. Yeah. That's great. You probably get a little ass boner watching me.

And maybe I get a little ass boner. You got a little last boner watching my fucking, but then the other path is like when I was watching you run, and I'm like, why is he doing it like that? It's different. I think you, I think you would do it different.

I don't have to, stand up for that. So it's different. I think you would do it different and that's why I'd want to see it. I was actually really self-conscious of the China episode when we were walking around of my walk cycle and I was like, I'm going to get shit for this.

Because you're gay? Well, you walk normal. I don't really walk that normal. And I was also like, when I get tired, I pay less attention to how I'm walking because I kind of have to like mentally adjust a lot because otherwise I'll be on my toes, which is embarrassing. People make fun of it. And after we had to wrap up and we were at McDonald's

and shit, I was very tired. and I'm walking around like my worst I look insane to me I look insane and I was like they're gonna fucking cook me live bro You just yeah because I think the thing is You think about yourself more than they're thinking about you But sometimes some people do end up noticing

And you're like a noticeer Yeah but that's just like a one off noticeer But it's not a one off noticeer because they noticed Like they were perceptive Yeah but that's a one off But like it's still it's a fundamental truth Is what I'm trying to say Like let's say I got time

little nuts, right? No one comments that you guys, I'll watch my sex tape, it's posted online, right? Everyone's like, oh, he's normal shots, normal strokes. And then, but one, and I know I have tiny nuts. One guy in the comments, like, he's got some kind of tiny nuts. That is a truth. Yes. It is a truth. And when the truth is revealed to you, it's like, but, but I think the truth doesn't, I think the truth doesn't matter.

Like, because like there are some truths, but. And the truth, wait, the truth could be that you have tiny nuts? This grass is green. That's a truth. But it's more like, you know, one would maybe wish their nuts were more normally big. Sure, but like, you know, it's like whatever your nuts are your nuts. You can't choose your nuts. But I will say, I've always wanted to walk normal. Who were you to lambast someone for their nuts?

I mean, I wouldn't. I would never do that. I think I got weird nuts. Yep. So I couldn't. Your nuts are normal. I got weird nuts. How are they, how?

My left one is bigger and droops deep. Oh, I have a left droop. Yeah. You know whose nuts are really different. Josh's. Oh, yeah. I mean, he only, he's singular nut.

Yeah, it's very interesting. He's got one nut. It's like, it's like the episode of South Park where the woman lifts up her breast and it's just two like, kind of dying little animals on her chest. And they go,

start the reactor. It's like that. It's like that. Crazy. Yeah. Is it like that? I don't know. I haven't seen his nuts.

I don't seen his nuts. We haven't seen Josh's. I am his boss, so I don't think. I can ask for him at this point. Oh. Ah. Laws.

I didn't think about that. I didn't think about that. This is the upsetting thing about getting in bed in the employment ways is because I feel like four years ago I could have just asked Josh to see his nuts

and now I can't. I mean, that's why I'm this like free spirit. This free agent that lives in this world, agent. I thought you said Asian. I thought you said Asian.

I'm the free Asian. Because they're not all free, but I am. I champion them. I am. And, you know, I get to do what Nintend. You get to see whatever a pair of nuts you want to see. Do whatever I want.

That's what. I drive at the top down at night sometimes. Yeah, well, but I'm, you know what? I think this is a good thing, Aiden. It's like it's called getting older. I'm 35. Nothing changed for me. It's called getting older and more mature and you have a job.

And you're a boss. And I have no boss. And you're beholden to people. You have a responsibility. You have like a schedule. You go to bed at a similar time. You wake up in a little time. You wait a hear that schedule.

You're consistent. I played Balotra on my phone now. Why? I don't know. You 100% at it. I know. Have you played Slay the Spire? No.

Dude, hop in. I saw, people were mad about that M2AF episode. About what? They were mad how bad you were playing the game. My first time. Ah? What can you do?

At least it, but the Chinese were not in there fucking defending you, so what could you do? You're all alone. I played it. I got better now. That's cool.

I got two clears. I think that's great. I can't beat the game consistently. But Balatro, it took me a one. but I think you get better. You also unlock shit. You unlock shit.

My schizophrenic journey was Street Fighter and I hit 1600 and I feel good. I'm just saying if you play, we could play together. We could play together. Yeah. I'll play with you. Oh, I have an idea for us. For all of us? Yeah.

Shit to shit. The YouTube video. It's a YouTube video? What? Week throat included. Week throat's in there. Week throat's in there. You know like that Mario Party game where everyone like lines up and you have to pick the vehicle

you drive and some vehicles drive. quicker than other vehicles. And it's like a different button combination to determine it. Yes. No. You never play this in Mario. It's one of the first three as well. But it's basically like, yeah, there's like a bunch of vehicles and you're like, which one do I get in?

How far is it going to go? Which one's, so anyway, that's the game. So we do the same thing, but in real life. So we all start at the same place. Okay, we're starting here. And there's four, there's four vehicles. One is like, it's like rollerblades. The other one is, is a bird's scooter.

then it's then it's public transport only okay and then it's and then it's like hitchhiking yeah and it's like who can get the farthest away from the starting location in like an hour or something sure yeah I love the ones that are more dangerous yeah I think the hitchhiking and the rollerbladings are dangerous have you ever hitchhiked I've never hitchhiked I've picked up hitched I've picked up I've I used to hitchhike a lot because I didn't have a fucking car and it sucked like to what? To home. From what?

I would hitchhike back and forth because I lived in a series of towns which were like eight miles apart and it was just highway. A mile. A mile. And we would wrap our, and we had to wrap our way to school, which was very difficult. Both ways.

He said, he said, I'll pick you up, but you better not stop the rap. And then he starts to fucking beat. I'll pick you up and the freestyle begins the whole time. And one time I stopped the freestyle, I let me off on the side of the fucking road.

But yeah, I actually used to hitchhack a lot. It was fun. Which vehicle? Which one do you take? I mean, you're kind of public transport billed. I mean, I'm kind of that guy, right? I feel like if I'm, I'm going to back it up.

No, phone, you can't look up. No, you can't look up. No, you can't look up like, Google Maps. How do I get to fucking the most efficient? No, you have to go raw off your own nuts. So you have to find your first bus. There should be a place we have to get to. It's not just how far we can get.

It's like we have to arrive. It's probably better if it's a race, right? It's like a pizza place in downtown L.A. And there's a red button there. We have to fucking smack it. Uh, type shit. To get to get to Kjala sushi. Yeah.

In Diamond Bar, California. Oh, my God. Just doing 40 miles on a bird scooter. Just on the side of a highway fucking freaking out. That's some Ludwig shit. You actually wouldn't work. Because the bird, once you leave like a certain range, you'd be. Yeah, but I think then you had to pick up another bird.

Would you like have to, like, go from pocket to pocket of birds? You have the daisy train birds and limes. I think you could throw the city bike in there too. Or you could like flip or zero a bird and then like unlock the boosters on it. Then like Michael fucking Reerks. Yeah, they take the governor off the bird and you can go really fast.

That's what we gotta do. Anyway, we'll do that when Nick's not fucking pissing out of this. Well guys, I hope you like this episode of the yard that still isn't what you normally experience because DL weak throat is gone. And it's like, will we ever be the same as we once were? Probably not. They would probably want.

ever be. But what you know what you can do is you can check out the Patreon episode, the bonus episode to see if maybe it is the same as it used to be. But we don't know. If you go to Patreon. But you have to check and you have to pay money to check so they pay money. It's like, I don't even know if it's not going to be the same. Shut the fuck up, Ludwig.

See ya.