The Yard - Ep. 45 - Aiden Tries Breastmilk as an Adult

Episode Date: May 18, 2022

This week, the boys talk about the YouTuber boxing event, Nick defeats the best melee player in the world, and Aiden dabbles in a bit of breast milk for the fans.

hello my little kittens do i have an order for you today or what the merch is re-releasing and it's coming out this thursday if you're one of our juicy sweet patreon members wait why are you reading it like well thought what are you doing like that yeah what are you doing what is happening what why are you doing all weird come back we asked you to be natural for one hello my little kittens don't call me remember monday's the day for you when the merch comes out like that cat is so cute is that a new hat so what ludwig's trying to say is uh our merch is coming out because it sold out really fast we're doing it again and we have a hat that we're selling now new item uh and if you're a tier three or two four in the patreon you can get it early because last time it sold out in two minutes which we did not expect to happen but just scared

him if you want to get it before it sells out you could join the patreon if you want to gamble which is kind of tight uh it'll be out monday but it'll be out thursday this thursday uh wait today that this episode's coming out well if it's on the video crazy how the future video uh you're watching the video i'll see you then my little kittens yeah so now let's go into the actual goddamn episode for five dollars off it's not a real discount do not try kitty you should try it it won't work and you don't it won't work we don't know we do it's actually crazy because we do know enjoy the yard maybe we were doing mormon family pictures that what does that mean is that

a genre it is it's like the pictures you see in a target when you buy a picture frame and it's a family that's there it's the default i saw it get made i saw the sausage they were all standing there they're like we're like white dresses Blush dresses And it was like in an ocean that was packed But we were just there anyway at sunset Were they wearing their ears? Their like Disney ears? I wish

With all their names in the cursive font It's like all the family members And then there's like Minnie, Mickey, and Goofy Like on the sides Yeah it was really expensive But I took the pictures and then you get wet during it by the way the photographer pcp i bet you do i bet you do what's up what's up during it the photographer is zero flash shooting into the sunset baller fuck it wait is that canon

canon 3d let's get canon the canon 3d camera when i said it i felt like i know you like computers what's that it makes three it makes 3d yeah the cool thing about mormon family photos is you you put on the red and blue glasses from spy kids when you look at them and when you go to the family photos that would be so tight it shoots out the like the smell so it's 4d it's just your all your nipples so it's a shirtless's just your all your nipples so it's a shirtless family photo and all your nipples have the 3d like film on it i actually don't really know how it works and then you you wear the red cyan glasses and all the nipples are coming i like that yeah it's tradition in the mormon home to offer your guest a pair of glasses so that they

can look at the nipples they can enjoy all your photos in your home yeah they can view the photos nicely and the longer the nipples the longer you've been in the family. It's like rings on a tree. And you're the... Real long in the nip. If you're the head Mormon of the house, you have the longest nipples in the house. They say Joseph Smith used to tie them and... That's right.

Weirdly, I'm imagining them always erect and never flopping down. Well, yeah, that's part of god's will just is that he keeps you just absolutely tented at thanksgiving my dad you pics are crazy my dad is beautiful tits yeah you can tell he's a grandmaster uh anyway my pants got wet and so i only could wear cuties pants which were booty shorts given to her by her um her mother-in-law and i was wearing that to a brazilian steakhouse right no go it was one of the shorts underwear dress code underwear leaked under they said we might be we might be brazilian but fucking we still we still gotta wear some pants yeah okay i know it gets hot down there but this is a steakhouse sir so i had to buy cords they call you

feo no what does that mean no i mean ugly well i got there that's right is it also ugly in portuguese feo you know they speak a different language right it's fail you're making that up wait what i did you just say it in spanish and then yes it was the same as he had a fail he made it th yeah which would be i feel like it's more of a joke about people in spain i i meant the first what's going on welcome back to the yard everybody episode 54 dude the uh 54 i was hoping you'd let it go that would mean that we're past a year yeah we wouldn't have done anything cool for a year i I think this is 45. Has it been a full year already?

No, it hasn't. That's what... No. God damn you. I got him. Come on. Come on. I stopped celebrating anniversaries.

Wait, wait. Do you do this on purpose now? Yeah. How long have you been doing this? I did that on purpose. I cannot tell. Look, the audio listeners have no idea that there's a cute-ass little cat on the set right now. Little cat.

Hi. Cute-ass little cat. And that Aiden looks like Eminem. Yeah. Yeah. What the fuck happened to us? You look like one of Trump's sons. We used to be a real country.

Aiden just drank the fifth of vodka and is asking us to dare him to drive. You look like you're a problem at a corn concert. You look like you hang up a Nelk Boys poster in your college dorm. You look like corn. Fuck, bro. The band. No. Not on the cob.

You look like you hang out with only high schoolers. And you're 24. I was like 20. That's not it. 25. Yeah, you're 25. Which is what you are. Your eyebrows look better.

It's crazy because they didn't change. I know. Yeah, Aiden's blonde. He is blonde. You look like you fucking hang out at the skate park and you've never skated. Oh, that's fucked. Yeah, you look like you're at the skate park and you have a skateboard in your hand you're holding it by the trucks and you critique people on their tricks but you've

never ridden around you and i'm like i'm like owen wilson for the first half of that video no no you're not like no because he's money yeah he's money what he's money not doing any tricks he's criticizing everybody that's what you just said no then no but just said. But you'll never do what he does in the second half. Yeah. Which contextualizes what Owen Wilson does in the second half. Owen Wilson hits the blunt side. Why are you telling the kids Santa doesn't exist? What's wrong with you?

You don't think he hits the blunt side? Both sides? Get the fuck out of my house. My dojo. Front salad. Back salad. I got beef with you. Yeah, front salad, back salad. Front blunt. With me me I'm mad at you You just roasted my hair for the past No I did He gave the layup

Much like the beloved album with the same name Everybody loves it Besides you three Album? You mean the TV show? I thought you were talking about the album Everybody loves Raymond I was like slime would know this artist It's an obscure punk band from the 80s uh you look i'm mad

at you because i you're always mad that we never hang out you disappear an entire week without saying a word to me you show up out of the blue with blonde hair i'm like what the hell is this you're like yeah who are you with where does this happen what did you do all week you guys know music video for stan you've seen the m&m music yeah yeah and he's writing so and they put it in the sound so it's stan but it's aiden and he's just like um so you've replied to me in a while uh which is okay it's fine uh because i'm actually playing valerian having a lot of fun i just want to make sure everything's good uh if we could like talk to each other maybe and like figure out like uh what the problem is because i'd love to resolve it uh yeah just like let me know and if not it's

totally okay uh but i'll talk to you later and and you don't kill yourself and your wife because you're just ultimately pretty reasonable about it yeah but i want to deep down yeah you're close i'm i'm harboring yeah the death i want to inflict but what's up dude what happened man where's the old aiden i miss the old aiden i mean i just dyed my hair yeah but you shouldn't have done that i shouldn't have i've been thinking about doing this for... I immediately asked him. I'm like, this is... You did this two years ago.

You're acting like it's this insane thing that you would never do. It's so much different. It's again... You're literally, again, comparing yourself.

This is like the Owen Wilson thing. It's not even close. Why is it different? I am Owen Wilson. Because it was for content. Was it for content back then? Yeah, I did marbles

and it was a random assortment of hair colors. It could have been pink. And he did it on screen. Oh, you're going to love part two of what aiden's gonna do to his hair then no i mean you guys will see what are you doing tyler ninja blevins blue yeah it's like if that's kind of the steps to success that i see so yeah. It's in the master class. I read his book. Master class episode three is dye your hair blue. It works every time. It's going to cost a lot, but you need to do it.

I just signed up for his class. And then greet every hairdresser. Did they reopen admission? You grinding? I'm grinding. I'm grinding the Ninja Blevins class. You learning a lot? No.

Isn't a master class just a video? Why is there a set number of signups? No, it's a curriculum. And they have, uh as far as i understand that you have like homework there's things that you have to do and then you also they also have people who like review your work so i imagine if it was infinite signups they couldn't handle the amount of people it's got to be pretty crushing to do the homework for that class because you just like boot up the stream follow all the steps and still have two fucking viewers and one of them's you do you think there's like an influx of like like fortnite players who all stream into the exact same thing they all have like the same

hashtag in the title they all blue hair yeah they all have a different shade sorry guys doing my homework i have to i have to say hello to 50 people today so uh it's actually so embarrassing if you just see like the bottom of the just chatting section or the fortnight section and it's just like all the thumbnails are the same yeah they give you the template you gotta have like a ninja master class like uh watermark yeah you have overlays yeah dude the class comes with like an overlay pack if i'm leading this class i'd say put hashtag ninja master class in your title. Viewbot all of them.

Yeah. Like 20 to 50. Nothing crazy. Oh, okay. Not a fucked up number. No, no, no, no. Just so it looks like you're- Looks like you're growing. Yeah.

And they're like, what the hell? They tell their friends about it. Yeah. No one really talks in my chat, but I have a pretty active community. Yeah. Exclamation point Discord for the Discord. I think they're so enthralled with my gameplay that they just don't talk. But when they do, I say hi say hi yeah because i've learned that bots that try

to have conversations with you would be really funny for twitch chat do they have those i think they have them in trains chat they have them for comments not for chat i mean they have them from trains chat to get fucking millions of dollars yeah but they do exist because trains chat he'll like click on it and be like yeah it's a fucking bot account wait did pay for that no they no no dude they're people that sit they have bot accounts that sit in trains chat because he does so many giveaways oh i thought this was the gambling sponsor trying to beef up the stream somehow no this is people because he tweets out giving away seven hundred thousand dollars one day fuck it and then you literally will have a good chance of getting like 5k if you just are there and press enter a better chance than watching me well wait why would yeah why would you don't give out money that's what i'm

saying it's like so you might as well watch him and do it in like like if you're gonna watch a stream and you also have a chance of winning 700k transfer you're phrasing which is weird yeah you said a better chance you also do this but have lower you're trying to say that there's a random chance you get 5k crackers with me what what they don't know about oh you don't know about cracker bro he's right there just don't call him that yeah actually when you call amen that now it is a slur yeah you look like the first guy they called that uh that's the cat's name it that's not true well i did a marble and it won oh that's the

marble that one and then that's a bad cat name yeah they're calling me reverse hp lovecraft because hp loves craft's name was the hard r cat that's his cat's name hard r man yeah that was h that was hp loves crafts uh cat's name that cannot be true but i have heard that hb lovecraft was racist if this is the reason why that's unreal i don't think this is the reason why i think this is the reason why people know oh yeah something about it dude, it being man right after. Yeah, what? Oh, it just says it. Jesus Christ. I mean, it's Google. They're not scared. Oh my God. We gotta stop saying kitty man.

Kitty man's done. That's crazy to call your cat. So anyway, say hello to Cracker Man. I liked potato. If you liked kitty man, you're gonna love What we have next

Dude my First suggestion was potato Like weeks ago And cutie in the chat was like I like that and I'm like No don't name it fucking potato You said it's bad that you shouldn't You're being weird

But she thought it was cute The other name in contention is Amon I don't like Amon You said it's bad that you shouldn't call things potato. But she thought it was cute. It is cute. Yeah, the other name in contention is Amon. I don't like Amon because it'll be confusing. Yeah. It's like having, like, you know, when you name your son. It'd be like having three people at our company with the same name. It'd be like that.

Well, that's what God wanted. This is what we can choose. We're the God to the cat. I want to be God and name things after me in my image oh yeah but if things that aren't yours everything is mine because i'm god okay that's actually fair he's omnipotent but if you tried to take this cat away a lot of it would break your neck and i don't think you can break god's neck it's a good point my neck if you tried it wouldn't snap i want to do it yeah he's really tempting me that's i love you a lot so i won't but boy that's how you get your neck and

rewind just to try it out told you my name is coots coots this guy this is good i like i like it because it's similar to boots which people call their cats that have little socks, whatever, but it doesn't have that. So it's like coots. It's different. Chat's name is Marbles. No. Oh, that's kind of cute. I like that.

Overwhelmingly. I don't like it because it's just what they were looking at when they said it. Yes, but it's the worst. It's like Ludwig. I want to name it Ludwig. You know what else would be good? Gnome. No, actually.

That's what we call Keemstar. Not at all. Maybe. Let's just call it Keemstar.nome. No, actually not at all. That's what we call Keemstar. Not at all. Let's just call it Keemstar. Maybe tire. Dude, I'm down for Keemstar. Let's take it back. You throw it against the wall.

Let's take it back. Come on. No, I was like, it's empowering because we'll take back Keemstar. No, no, because it's fucking worthless. It doesn't have any value. You just throw it against the fucking wall. I'm getting where you're going. Don't love that because he's cute.

Jesus Christ. He's very cute. He's right there, dude. He can hear you. He's trying to climb out now she's not keemstar she's cute we do have a bad precedent because derz is a girl but we all collectively say he that can't is that leakable yeah it's leakable oh god no god we talked about this i didn't know it was i didn't know a street knowledge yeah it's also like chill like what's dirty who's gonna be like dude seriously yeah wait what would be the danger of that i i just think you narc i genuinely don't i think we should ask ders before we do something like that that's fair enough we're not talking

to there's mad because this guy they're just so fucking mad all the time now he just kind of hangs out in weird spots that he doesn't hang out in anymore i didn't realize cats get like that i thought like when a cat's older than like a baby ass cat ass it would just kind of be like all right well i'm your fucking dad now yeah and so this is how this goes and i'm gonna meow at you when you're near my food and you're not gonna eat it anymore but we're chill i think there's like three or four though so there's is like i'm still baby yeah but in cat years that's like what like four million or like whatever how's it work i don't think there's a lot for audio people we have this we have this carrier in front of us right that's what the cat is in right now and uh cutie was just having new

cat hang out in the carrier downstairs last night and uh derz straight up just climbs into the carrier and eats all of his food no way yeah it's so money it was pretty alpha nick has some insane pictures oh dude i'm gonna i'll get this over to zipper i took this insane oh i could put it well it would just be like a 10 second clip sure without any audio but you know what you do we record a voiceover like wombo combo or something like hype while he's doing it like when he's stealing the food yeah dude it's actually the picture the picture is like a painting it's beautiful i'm gonna send it to zipper i was uh oh man i was thinking oh what is it she just meowed the tiniest of them meow in the world i wish they could hear that she barely does that too

she's pretty quiet most of the cats are goaded i figure i should have gotten this fucking years ago it's weird we like trapped this like trapped in our attic and it's like meowing you were the only person who's against this the whole time i was against it in the moment it came out turns out cats are great for content this is why i can't fucking trust what you which is annoying every time i go to ludwig it's like about content or it's about like youtube or something and it's like he is the authority he has he knows so much but you ask him something he's like i don't know i'm like why is this person not as successful he's like i don't know i think it's a good thing to say i don't know yeah but also you'll say something definitively and you'll be like like ludwig i think this is a good idea and you're like

no that's stupid and then you'll see someone else do it and you'll be like yeah it's pog we need to do that and it's so fucking annoying yeah oh my god that is so funny yeah this is like one of the most beautiful photos oh my god they they sound potato they sat like you know how long it takes a cat to eat like a whole bowl of food yeah but they eat so little they sat like that the entire time and i filmed the entire two and a half minutes. Qt's was watching the whole time. That's so funny. Maybe it's a funny intro if I just speed it up.

And it's two and a half minutes and ten seconds. It's just all the food. Yeah, that'd be good. Like I make Minecraft noises. We get director's commentary from Durs. Oh, man. I just found out that it's broke. I didn't realize how good it would be.

Like I knew Shlat had a cat and it was good for for content but i was sitting at 28k viewers today playing marbles just picking a cat name well for a cat for a cat for like four hours and then i posted a tweet with picture of cat 50k likes yeah i i posted uh just now on the yard twitter audio listeners are going to be pissed and it's popping off and it's just the cat thousand likes already you're you're like a guy in 2008 it's like dude pictures of cats are doing so good yeah i thought it was i thought it was done i thought like i thought that was like if they like talked but we like swapped the s's for z's oh they're like stupid sounding because they're like elegant but we make them look stupid burgers yes you actually are just like me because you'll have such a vehement opinion of something

And then you'll experience it and you'll be like Ah I was wrong Well I didn't want the cat because I didn't want a fucking cat And also my valid concern To one was that the cat would love you guys Which I don't want that Why not? Because I want it to love me

You don't think it's possible of doing both? No Aiden's too charming Dude Duris hates Aiden now and we hate him now too because the hair were you not afraid when you started this podcast that all your fans would love us instead of you no oh you were confident huh i just i'm okay with they love you but i want the cat to love me like if they all love you and don't love me i'm like whatever i'm down no trolley problem it's the cat and then all one million of your fans Yeah And then Troll just

Fucking plows through them all You're here A million times Yeah I'm down It's a good train But if I'm lying down Watching anime deaths

And the cat is on Aemon And not me I'm necking myself next day Yeah Uh huh Wow That's where I'm at You're vulnerable

Uh huh You should be Keemstar Problem two I had Was that Ders would be sad. Why? Fuck Ders, bro. Oh, it's because there's a new cat. Because there's a new hot bitch in town. Ders is sad.

I know. That is happening. Yeah, but he's being annoying. There's a new hot bitch in town. So it's like he's being sad in the same way like Eamon's sad when you tell him he can't fucking plow three women in one night. I was going to try to say something else else but i didn't want to do that and then i was like oh i need the apples right here baby yeah don't worry i want to like jiggling

it's the apples of the apple the apple right there that's the way the balls don't fall far from the cock hey it's true they say that as a as my coach used to say. So what coach? What sport? Oh, you know, sports. Yeah, sure. He was hot. Yeah. Hot coach.

That's weird. I get the mean. There's a kid. That's my toe. You ever see a toe before? Anyway, that's it. That's big cat update. I was thinking about it, and I was like, when you were describing the Mormon picture, I

was like, man, if Cutie's lucky that me and her aren't together because i would have killed her entire family they sound so annoying she sounds lucky yeah yeah she's yeah that was that was a real stroke of luck god bless they're great i actually don't mind hanging out with them at all even though they make like stock photos of people. Yeah. Like, like cutie was more annoyed at that than I was. Interesting. She was like mad.

And I was like, whatever, man, we'll just take pictures. It's fine. It's easy when you're the guest, right? It's like,

you're just along for the ride. But when you're with your family, it's like, it's the whole iceberg of like every time you're like, you're, I don't know. Your parents were like fucking assholes or something like that. Yeah.

I do have like a, like we went to a Brazilian steakhouse and, uh, and it was supposed to be all 17 of us like eight kids and we had a giant table in the back that's when before they cook the steak they they shave it's pussy first that's trying to think yeah it took me so long you shouldn't be wasting steaks on kids either i hope they had some well what happened is we sat down they shouldn't be wasting steaks on kids either i hope they had some well what happened is we sat down they shouldn't be wasting these kids menus i'm just saying so funny i fucking within 30 seconds they decided they were leaving all the parents because the kids were all crying they're like i can't eat it and like you just don't want to deal with that and it's annoying to everyone else so like all right we're just gonna fucking go kid who's losing it she's like oh my god like we i

told you it was a steak house i told you it's really zillion i sent you the menu you didn't look at it and i was like and i stole they had these cheesy garlic bread sticks i put them in a bag like 15 of them and i just handed it out to the kids what bag i had the bag to buy these corduroys so it was like a target bag yeah and i just had a bunch of bread knots in them you just swoop in to be nice to these kids you're showing them daily bread uh-huh it has like powdered latex coating the inside it's like wait this is 60 what the fuck you treat kids worse than you treat yourself you pull out the little oxygen baggie you're like i don't know you can have this one it says do not eat but you won't die it's fine three times at disney they dropped the popsicle

on the ground. I picked it up, poured water on it, gave it right back to them. When they ate it up? Yeah. Like a little animal? If it was my own Popsicle, I'm like, the seasoned Popsicle. Don't need that. It tastes better that way.

Yeah. It's got mouse dirt. Tell them to make it down south. The sweat of Disney employees. Dude, you, so wait. So we didn't go to the Brazilian. QD was losing it. I wasn't because I'm like not, it's not my family. I guess you're i guess you're all right but either way it's also your job when you're in that spot

to like because she's she's having a shit time and you can't have a shit time as well yeah you gotta be the rock johnson yeah so i i like hanging out with them cool but i'm i feel like i there's not a group of people i would have shot them all one by one. Why? Still? I thought I was swinging you. Did I swing you at all? Will you leave one of the kids?

Fuck no. Wow. Maybe I keep one. I line the kids up outside the steakhouse. Outside the steakhouse like it's fucking Columbia. It's the drug of life. Come come here you're my little guy yeah i keep one it's my little guy and then we name that with marble and you raise it don't say name that when referring to a kid why what should i say like name him name her like a little more humanizing yeah but i'm gonna feed him and dress him and throw him around i'm gonna do all the things you do water it i'm gonna walk it

this kid turns on i'm gonna i'm gonna give him cockroaches and grasshoppers i'm gonna put a uv light in his room he can lick his own eyeballs with his tongue are you ever gonna have kids i don't think so i think it's good you didn't even wait for no i don't think so i don't think i want kids god bless but well no i uh what did you say amen just a little bit ago i had something you said dear slim you said dear slime my name is i i messaged you but you went and blocked me i forget either way yeah uh that's no you keep the kid and you fucking oh yeah it's like kill bill because the kid like you tell it like hey look you saw what i did you heard of the kid and uh i'm gonna raise you and if you want to kill me at 18 i will fight you right but you will live

with me all right we should we should all have that's just uh that's a vinland saga that is also vinland saga really yeah we should all the cat is the cat jumping at me yeah he's jumping oh it's so cute he's another one who hates skinny jeans oh come on bro why are you wearing these look fucking stupid newborn baby knows they're cringe everyone's coming at me bro 2022 hi you're wearing them too man these aren't skinny these are dad taper slim get owned dumb ass idiot don't ever speak to me i feel like they're like pretty much the same they literally say dad taper slim and they're not mine don't say it's skinny got thick legs yeah i got horse trunks you're slim i got horses i got slim shady pants i don't remember i was oh i remember uh we should all have one kid and then we should all train our

kid to fight the other ones we should tell them that there's three other kids that are hunting so they don't have a concept of life because they're born and they're under our control that's right so we homeschool all of our kids and we tell all of them there's three kids out there who are looking for you in the world and when they find you they're going to fucking kill you it's like the one thing that you base their whole life around yeah you're not home one day and a kid ding dong ditches that your child will kill that child no no no we'll we'll give pictures we'll share pictures with each other i'll be be like, this is what those kids look like.

And then when they turn 18, we're going to arrange them to all meet in a park. Yeah. And then they'll fucking try to kill each other. That would be so funny experiment.

The 18 year experiment. Winner, no, I was going to say gets to keep the kid, but the winner would already have their own kid. That's enough.

No, no, no. Chuck E. Cheese. Chuck E. Cheese. Yeah, winner gets to have Chuck E. Cheese. Yeah. At 18. And then you tell

the winner ah we were just kidding no cause you're homeschooling we were just kidding they didn't actually want to is us

good job I was gonna say that you little fuckers you're crazy they can't like read they can't do anything they can't there's no combat

but they can fight like a machine we should all teach them different training methods like jujitsu karate oh yeah and then and then it's like which in the youtube videos which fighting style is the best but then you get in it's like we train four children for 18 years they cannot read write or speak languages but they are jujitsu karate unintelligible children who are fucking weapons it's like spongebob it's like forget everything except breathing and fine dining but it's breathing and hand-to-hand combat if you look anything like any of these children stay

inside there's news alerts because that would create people who actually have to be worried about kids who look like that looking for them. Yeah. Yeah. Also, it'd create like a culture of like, yeah, I'm hard. I dressed up like kid number two. I don't fucking care. Yeah. It would go by numbers.

We lock our kids inside on Halloween. So they don't go on a purge. Because they're all messed up. You know what? Maybe your girlfriend's family's are worth something. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe they're not bad. They could make

those kids do anything i want to hear my secret plot with the with that with those gaggle of kids oh you put them all in a big battle bus and drop them out of the sky and then make fortnight but in real life get close enough that they allow me to babysit them okay and then do uh old enough with just those kiddos okay oh she's like wait don't do that you're being weird do we y'all have mid up here doing old enough but just in los angeles in the middle of the night yeah i went to detroit michigan at 3 a.m and i sent my kid to the casino yeah no yeah we all tried to operate a white castle together yeah and that's why i want to send them on little american missions

you think it'd be publicized for well like other audiences because like you the fun part about old enough is that they're like japanese kids and it's different culture right i think it'd be really fun to see it in america because i think the moment you see old enough you go we couldn't do that we couldn't do that because i couldn't send my kid to 7-Eleven. I think sort of the reverse version of this is there's this YouTube video from this Korean guy. And he makes little documentary sort of type content. And he goes to Stockton and hangs out with a bunch of gangs. But films it from the perspective of a Korean guy who doesn't know anything about this sort of culture. Does he end up battle rapping at the end end that guy's name dumbfounded like people's yards and like

they show off their fucking guns and shit and the whole thing is subtitled in korean that's so sick yeah it's like a really dope video because it's it's just like it's i feel like it's the whole content of the video like wouldn't be that exciting from our perspective, but apparently to the average Korean citizen, it's like, holy shit, what is going on? It's documented. Damn, that's what LA is like. That's our old enough. That's our old enough.

That's the way we like when you say it, Ludwig. I watched a video today from this YouTuber from England. Fuck, what's his name, Ludwig? He's Nico something. Nico, the fat one who eats a lot? No, no, no. I just watched this video. today from um this this uh youtuber from england fuck what's his name loaded he's nico something nico oh it was that one who eats a lot no no i just watched this video he goes to arkansas right yeah so he went he he's a black guy and he goes to the most racist town in alabama oh the guy who ran for mayor i don't know his name yeah yeah this guy that guy's racist town in arkansas this video is fucking slap he's a viral video really fucking good he does not stop making viral i

watched the whole video he just goes to the most what's you know what he found the most racist town in alabama and everyone there is super nice and chill you keep saying alabama it's in texas oh wait it's arkansas i just said it like three times it might be mississippi all right so they're in alabama and uh deep red slumps wait everyone's really nice to him so everyone's really cool and chill and no one there's racist and they're like yeah everyone thinks we're racist because like the the ex kkk leader isn't like the town over uh but like we're all like not racist and he's like oh cool so then he goes and interviews the kkk leader and he's like oh yeah i'm racist i'm a racist he's like and he's like uh he like he's just they're like he's just fucking with him but the interview is

him fucking with him yeah yeah his name is i'm our nonce and he's like oh i'm with i'm our nonce and the guy there's another word he calls him to schedule the interview and he just said like he's a british guy right and he just says he's with the bbc but it's like for his youtube i love that he's with the bbc he says he's a really big fan and he wants to prove the kkk is not racist and that's the point of the interview it's so it's so easy the guy in the video he's like so uh he's he's saying this thing he's like not so like i think people like don't understand like like i have i have as much sympathy is like if like a black a black kid was killed he thinks for a moment he's like well no i'd have more sympathy for a white kid i want to make that clear that's insane yeah yeah he's just like he's just like like ultra racist did this come out like recently i think so two days ago it was in my my

timing this is like the rhetoric back in the manifesto dude where he asks himself if he's a white supremacist and he's like yeah yeah yeah it's just like psychopathic and then and then like the media is like yeah we're not sure like we don't know it's an investigation whether it's a hate crime or not so insane yeah the so uh is it jidian or jidian jidian okay so jidian made a video like a week ago in the same town and the reason they're all going there is because of like a viral video from like over a year ago where this guy from out of town like decides to stand on the side of the road and at stores in that town with like a sign that just says black lives matter oh yeah and he doesn't say anything and he just like lets people come by and like basically yell at him this is a white guy right and this is a

white guy and everyone comes up and it's like i'm gonna fucking kill you tonight yeah and like don't be here tonight the things people say to him are are fucked up so there's this like string of videos from other youtubers that go to this town after to see if it's like really the most racist town in america like that's the context i hate the idea of stimulating this tiny little town's economy and by like you know having having like racial racist tourism yeah to go there we should go to that town in arkansas with like a black live matter sign but it's one of those cool big arrows and we do like the spinning around on this on the corner if we do a cool trick they're like they're i don't like what he's doing but it looks pretty cool

there's a big arrow pointing over to that piece of place well he's he's surfing on it there ain't no water over there yeah that's true they'd be like i don't know what it says but even if you wasn't spinning it jdn made like the same type of video type of video as this nico guy basically like exploring the town and like talking to people there and like the general takeaway is that like the average person there is like not a piece of shit like that's like their their takeaway sample size but that's also like you don't know you might go home and find out what their fucking cat's name is jdn was a little too much like nobody's racist yeah yeah jdn was like it's like i'm pretty sure there's no racists in this town.

Or like, the town's all right. You should all see it. You've talked to like 20 people, man. There is a really, really funny part that Nico doesn't acknowledge in the video where he's like on his way to the interview and he exits the hotel and he opens the door and he just walks by a guy that he's like sup to and it's Jadian filming his own video. What? They don't acknowledge

it at all. Did they plan it? Yeah, it's, like, obviously very intentional. But it's, like, you wouldn't know unless you also watched the other video. I remember that part, I just didn't recognize the guy. That's Marvel shit. Yeah. And then if that's in the theater? Yeah, yeah. I was looking on Twitter the other day, and it was, like,

someone was saying, watching the Spider-Man movie, we're going to spoil it, by the way, you fucking lunchbox freaks. No Wayne home. He has webs. No Wayne home. He shoots fat ropey webs. Toby's in it.

When the other Spider-Man comes to the portal, and he's got his ropey webs all over himself, someone said it's weird watching it without the theater, because it's like they pause for the applause. yeah it's like ew they probably have that is weird yeah it's a good point you have to otherwise they'll miss yeah because if you say a line and it's normal timing because there's not people with their pjs in their lunch boxes they don't have time to come down from hooting and hollering because they saw spoder man stand-up special it's like you're watching saturday night live yeah they'll do like a news segment and like the news person isn't

talking and it's like the news isn't like this yeah or it's like uh it's like when you take the laugh track out of like um you know big bang theory those are always i love those or you put in the titus it's really faint and my new favorite thing is hour-long videos of silence interrupted by and it's like titus laugh and it's randomized random i like that yeah and you it's in there what's the one where it's like 10 hours and it's just occasionally interrupted by mario going i like that i like the sound that goes what you know that one it's not a two-malling let's say that one like i have a playlist of these i feel like no i feel like he's doing it really well 85 of people are like bang in chat right now some people work their whole

lives towards their like master project someone's just like 10 hour timeline genre of video to leave on the background of like your grandmother's computer oh i would love that scare playing it in time square paying for it to play on the big screen time square it was the wild just like whoa yeah hey yeah you mind if i spoil your big idea that you had in the room wait what's my big idea you're complaining about not seeing me for for a week oh yeah as if we have these like engaging conversations lately uh-huh and you come into the room i haven't seen you all day you sit down first thing you say to me you're like you're sitting there with a cat you're like what if we what if we do like a ketamine episode and just don't tell anthony and

nick well now we can't do it why would you tell us it is fucking what the you are so far from owen wilson that you ever could be i want you to know that yeah owen wilson notable ketamine user no probably in spirit and swag and you're not even getting that just what the fuck are you that was a good idea right guys that's a great idea that's a great idea i wanted to do and now we're always you want to be in the k-hole for an episode you're fucking one of your best friends comes up and says yo let's take horse tranquilizers and prank our friends and the first thing you do is narc insane also i offered him it out i said what about dmt don't do dmt no no no no hey okay now i'm with amon you guys don't want to fuck with that you heard zipper zipper just sighed zipper moaned

a little do not actually we should have two rules don't do dmt and don't let me go barefoot on this podcast again what and it's my fucking big old gripper. Did your rating go down? I haven't checked. On the feet side? I haven't checked, but all I see is my big old clomper in every close-up of you and it's like the

only thing you can see. Wait, what are you talking about? Damn, left it on, bro. Hey, sorry. Oh, did the podcast interrupt your life or something phone call is there a problem who called you sorry guys i got a phone call oh it's a podcast there's a little moon icon that we can use okay to make our phone so they're not disruptive crescent all right who was that it was a spam call okay so who is she so uh her name her name is spam call are you just texting spam call pictures of your fucking balls is that what's going on every time i get a spam call i reply

with a picture of my balls and i say you interested how can you be over five how can your rating be over five that is from yesterday who's updating this someone is updating this for oh my god dude this is the yard look at all the gripper pictures from the yard dude you look great yeah i know but like it's really it's like when i watch the tiktoks i can't not look at my feet and so i like slime on here no grippers rule i hope not i don't think so but if i am you can't control it that that shit actually didn't piss me off it's just annoying it's like what you can control is people talking to you and their reaction but if it's like whatever you just got to live with it yeah that's a little slime inside you thought you thought I'd be mad you thought for once he ain't on the on the subject of fucking

with spam callers we had a like an election a local election like a while back and we would get these crazy like insane spam campaigns and uh when i was like hi this is lorna volunteer uh supporting this this politician all registers in california should have received a voted by mail ballot please follow the instructions all this stuff and it introduces herself as lorna it's like someone's number it's a 626 number it's like a human being's number and uh it's important to return your ballot as soon as you can. Can we count on you to return it ASAP? And I said, I replied, Lorna, please, God, leave me alone.

All I want is to be left alone from getting these texts several times a day. If I get one again, I will kill myself live on the internet and cite you as the reason. Do you understand, Lorna? Next message. I have reached the tattered edge of my will to live because of these text messages. And then next message. Three minutes later. Like I thought about it.

Are you prepared to live with the direct cost of a life? She didn't reply to any of this. No, she did. Ten minutes later. Please seek help immediately and call probably a suicide outline number. They will provide free and confidential support. Reply one more time.

LMAO, what the fuck is Lorna? I'm i'm just gonna message her and say what are you doing i just did lmao just kidding what are you doing so long ago this is from so long ago like we clicked last time we talked i'll screenshot it yeah for it looks really funny what you doing it's two years ago two years yeah yeah dude that's funny imagine she doesn't have logs new phone dude she's never said a text like that ever again holy shit dude that's so awesome it was it was annoying i mean you guys remember it was rampant i didn't even vote i had a i had an issue recently where i think somebody was uh spoofing my number to call like to mass call people and for a whole day i got calls and voicemail uh mails back from businesses that were like looking looking to get back in contact with me i forgot about this yeah this is

so funny dude i it was so no it's unlocked because some people would keep calling some people i'm like why is this person calling back for the fourth time and i'd pick up and i'm like and they're like hey you gotta stop calling my business like if you want something like just just stop uh stop giving us calls i'm like i don't know what to tell you it's calling these people back on an individual level and explaining what's going on it is it was one of the funniest things ever he's calling people he's like hi so okay so what i think what's happening is i think someone is spoofing my number to call and so it wasn't me who called you so i understand that like you're upset but like i wasn't i'm literally driving and i'm like aiden's a sociopath he's crazy you're doing this in the car yeah yeah

we're on the way back from genesis yeah no i wasn't calling back each person you call them back in a car with someone else with you why is that why is that the difference to you it's just funny because like you this is just happening to you and telling one person what's going on is going to do no damage no it was because some people kept calling me it's like one dude called me back maybe four times and i can see that it's the same number number he's done but you said you explain all the situation then it's like i'm pranking him because i have clearly i have clearly been calling him all day i'm not pranking you i don't even like pranks okay my friend wanted to do ketamine on a podcast it's a thing it's on the internet it made me feel like

a good business idea we could actually work with it i don't know i couldn't have called you i was coming home from a smash turn okay juan so i can yeah dude wait amen what what the fuck why wouldn't you just i feel like you can just not do all of that effort i feel like you're in you do you just want to be right because listen no i no i it's the same thing if you were like hey this video is really funny and we all have those things we're like i don't care if i'm getting owned i have to explain why i'm right no and like i would do the same thing you're you're you're clearly intentionally not listening to me yeah wait yeah no i am i am oh how's it feel by the way but i am listening to you intentionally i being the key word here i was like the comments back from our last bonus episode we all got heated because

amon was unable to decipher what english language sentences yeah some some fucking dumbass wrote a whole reddit post explaining why oh that was insane and i read it i was just like damn one sentence in this is already wrong someone someone on the patreon commented i wish slime would quit directing the conversation and i was like imagine paying to write this comment but but what i'm saying is uh let's just all go back to it go finish finish your reasoning because we didn't let you do that okay so somebody is spoofing my number to call uh clearly a mass amount of numbers and i'd be spanking on your phone calls from different people in the same geographical area all day most of these people only call back once some of them leave a voicemail but some people keep calling me back over and over and over again so these are like disgruntled

customers disgruntled businesses that have clearly been like spam called by my number you said you were gonna clean all the cum off of our walls in the business and there's cum everywhere yeah it would have been funny if you just answered was like hey and they're like why are you calling it's like i just want to talk why are you answering that's what i did the first time somebody called me okay no no i'm saying you're having a real conversation like okay how about you explain the problem again and they're like oh there's just fucking come everywhere you said come removal services and they still come and you're like well the reason why we couldn't get out there today is because the truck is like you know there weren't no gas in the truck and they would all say they all were

like very like mundane businesses like it was like plumbers and like moving services and things like that heroes so i did i did not capitalize on the opportunity to give them a fake business opportunity, but I can't do that. Hey, when you were a young boy, your father would take you into the city, see a marching band. Not even blonde.

In the video, he's blonde. Is he even blonde? In the video, he's blonde. In the video, he's literally blonde. He's not blonde now, is he? It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. It was 20 years ago. I'm talking about the song. I haven't seen the video.'s literally blonde he's not blonde now is he it doesn't matter it was 20 years i'm

talking about the song i haven't seen the video that's crazy tough tough loss to jmook i can't believe i'm gonna i'm gonna fucking i'm gonna why why is this my fault why is it you know like people make those videos where it's like they they they kind of like a celebrity and they like go on youtube it's like they act like they're the celebrity and people follow them around the mall and stuff you know yeah like i'm not macklemore but yeah he looks like he does does that for aaron carter tiktok live streams big thing is dressing up like a so like there's a guy who dress up as jack sparrow and and then he just speaks slightly drunk and says like i'm a ted well that's not the quite the same thing yeah that's just an impersonator huh well there's

also a guy yeah that's more character yeah yeah it's literally a character from a disney movie who isn't real i'll be finding out right now jacksboro's not real nobody's like a pirate why would jack sparrow not come help johnny death it's like those guys in tom's time square they like dress up as mickey mouse but they're not the real mickey mouse well maybe maybe one of them is you never know maybe he's got real mickey mouse organs because mickey mouse well maybe maybe one of them is you never know maybe he's got real mickey mouse organs because mickey mouse got two stomachs do you hurt your head you see it yeah dude i sliced a piece of skin off my head tilt down like a unicorn yeah it's pretty fucked up oh shit that's where the horn grows i sliced a yeah do you take the cool skin like you take and keep it i like i'm shaving

my head and it just and it didn't even feel it and then i look at it and there's like this piece of paper on it oh god like it's fucked up i'm like trying to get you just peel it and it all your head comes off yeah and it looks like the nightmare woe jack yeah you know and uh there was i think one of those i saw something on the internet was like um that one of the michael jackson impersonators on um in fremont in vegas is like someone tried to fuck with him and he's like pulled out the most technical mma takedown ever and it's like and someone in the comments like yeah don't fuck with the michael jackson guys in vegas like they they all know mma i like that idea only the michael jack Jackson one we should do a boxing event like the creator clash

except it's all kids and we give them sock-em-bop-ems a lot of our ideas revolve around kids fighting yeah it's hilarious we should get into

we've already accepted as a society that kids can hit each other if they have sock-em-bop-ems on right because it's on the box yeah it's on the commercial yeah

it's more fun than a pillow fight yeah which are fun all on their own so we put them all on a ring and then they have sock and bop them and they fight to the death or just till one of them stops you know it's fine you don't need to you can't kill someone with a sock and bopper i don't think i could kill someone with oh okay so zippers pulled up the old commercial man they're a cartwheel i've used these bad actually yeah

years and recently i'm remembering i'm having a fucking flashback moment. I got my shit rocked by one of these shits. Yeah, dude. They're actually not fun. Me and my neighbors all had them. We just fight each other. Yeah. We do them on the trampoline.

With adult power, they pop. They pop? Do you pop one on Eamon's fucking blonde head? I could, but I could also pop one on your head. Your bald head. Yeah, but I have a strong... I actually have a really strong skull Your horn would pop it

My horn would pop it I'm a venom snake now Dude those things are Those things are like Like bounce houses They're like tough Like rubber Yeah they're like airbags

Airbags used to blind you They still can I think If you get hit by them That's sick Do you want to fight? How about you fight Nick? With sock-em-bop-ems? No

Like actually box In the arena The creator clash Every creator wants to fight now and they're all tweeting about fighting who would you fight but would you fight uh if my shoulder wasn't fucked maybe i was thinking about it dude my shoulders hurt obviously right like it's just you know my back hurts but how about you just stop being a pussy oh okay my bad and just say i'll ignore that part you would want i'd be interested i wasn't before but then after watching i was like this looks fun because like even you get

hit really really hard and it sucks until like the fight's over and then it hurts the next day it's like okay whatever i got the fight it's kind of fun well it depends holy shit bro that was four bugs or one bug that had a bad time yeah took a couple hits uh i don't know i have to think about who in the space is my size Dude Does the bug tap Does the bug zapper One tap the cat No No no shot

We can try We can toss it You seem real sure That little I am confident But let's not find out We try out right now I mean we could

One tap swing You think you know But we could No Aiden vs. Warchul That seems I don't know how fit Warchul is I think he's about As fit as Aiden versus Warchul. That seems... I don't know how fit Warchul is. I think he's about as fit as Aiden is.

It seems fair. If I win, I get to move to Norway. Winner stays in the yard. You get Norwegian citizenship. Yes. Hi, potato. We're going to put you in the bug zapper. We can do that.

Should we do the head or the foot we can try the cat and then I'll try your face in it and we'll see which one hurts more I'm down I think that's fair did you guys all watch the creator clash I did I thought it was fire I was like this shit was great

it was a great event Nick Yingling showed me the the national anthem performance this morning who did it oh i haven't seen it airsoft fatty airsoft fatty the is that new shit no it's like items made a documentary about a kid youtube channel it's a whole thing it's a lot of explanation it's basically just a kid that items made a video about or documentary about and he's just very large and not good at singing okay and he's sang the national anthem and like

didn't know the yeah he's kind of like little big and like didn't know the words so also like yeah yeah yeah yeah he he yeah i'm sorry this is not all right i'm sorry dude he was getting mad i could tell what we just took the cat back take the cat and call me fat so you get one and when both i will take fat i don't need the cat. All right. So that's mine. Hi, Potato. You're the cutest cat in the world. This cat is really cute. And I like this cat more than Durs. He's so tiny, man.

Can't say that. It's a competition. And this cat's winning. It is a competition. Why are you guys the way you are? That's the thing about pets and children is that you have to love one the most. You guys are the worst humans. Even if you won't admit it.

I know. I wish I would have bet on all the matches. Because I was right about all of them. Was there betting? I couldn't find it. Someone made fucking 50 rack because we put money on the Logan Paul fight and someone bet on a tie, a draw. And we didn't even think about that.

We both lost. Me and Ludwig lost 1,000. We did lose some cash. But it was like 50 to 1. Michael Reeves was sick. What did he do? I heard he was sick. Who did he fight? He fought the investment YouTuber. They're like

the same height, but the guy has like seven years on him in age. But Michael clearly trained. He looked like a real boxer. It was so sick. Did Michael win? Yeah, he fucked him up. It was sick. You know what sucks though okay i dubs runs the entire event and he's the the ultimate match he loses no that makes sense because he was the

underdog it was he like i thought for sure i thought he was kind of even going in no no the whole point like he in his video announcing who he was going to fight he was like i picked this person because like if i'm gonna train for this long i should not be like favored over the person does it depend how he loses too it could be like favored over the person does it depend how he loses too it could be like a fucking wash no it was a great fight like five rounds if it's a good fight it's five rounds the other guy's face was fucked up too like yeah he just lost but like it was a good fight i thought it was a perfect event the only thing that made it better is one person getting knocked out because no one got knocked out yeah it was all tks yeah yeah

because i don't think i think if it they might have uh i think they were calling it early because of how amateur the fights were like they were calling technical knockout i think closer earlier than they normally would yeah 12 rounds is too much for like a no not like in rounds i mean like like matt watson for example out the gate is he lost in like under a minute like he literally gets pulverized oh and they're like there's no coming back and they and he didn't fall or the ref is like you cannot i have to end this fight for your safety yeah the ref was just like tko it's over yeah okay and i think in like a real amateur boxing event they probably would let them keep going until i don't think they would have i don't know he was getting too shit pushing yeah maybe every tk watson's a bad example it looked bad the tkos he was like okay if this

kept going like like uh there's the australian i did a thing oh my god did he at one point at one point he's fucking up the other guy he's fighting right he's fighting the odd one out the fucking huge youtuber you see in target when you go to the board game section he does animation youtuber and dude that's what happens in the fight he's literally the australian guy's just fucking him up and then he he turns to the ref and says end the fight that's funny and then keeps punching him it was so funny and then he turns to the ref and says end the fight that's funny and then keeps punching him it was so funny and then he turns after a couple more punches he's like end the fight a couple more punches and the fight and he's punching the ref and the fight he's like both

you let's fucking go it was the biggest mismatch dude he fought in khakis money he was the only person not wearing boxing shorts he was six three australian ripped the other guy was like five ten american had started working out in the past 18 months. Is it only weight class for fighting and stuff? Weight classes don't really matter in show matches. None of them were correct weight. But it does. No, they had weight classes.

They made people come down or go up to fight each other. But they didn't actually. Minx had, I think, eight pounds, and she was supposed to be even with the person she was fighting. I thought it was just a certain range. They were supposed to both be 150. So I think they both agreed on a number for probably every fight, but none of them probably hit. I see.

How long was the event? Three hours. Dude, Minx's fight was so funny. So the other girl, Haley Sharp, I think is her name. She looked really good. She looked like she trained really hard and learned a about boxing was and looked technically like a really good fighter but no matter what punch hit minx minx was just a wall yeah just take a punch and then just be like all right and then just keep punching her back but when but minx hit with like like bigger damage

minx had like a like a like she wound her fist like this and hit her and it was like did she she won yeah she won yeah yeah there's just not enough stagger it was like one of those dolls that you hit and then it just goes right back up yeah she's like wabba fat yeah yeah that's that irish rage they were all they were all tied as fuck every fight every i think every single fight was good then there were some that were like less good uh like i get the heavy weight fight or what was that so it was a um it was like uh what do you call it pay-per-view right yes and it was probably like restreamed somewhere else it was i watched it with a thousand viewers on a twitch stream because when you go to

buy it because we had one key and you can't use it on multiple computers and i had to go downstairs because i was recording something and when i went to buy it it said you can watch the replay when it's done and i was like that's cringe i want to watch it live didn't realize that it would have worked uh and so i go to twitch and i'm browsing and i see a guy with like 50 viewers i click it and he's watching the fight and then by the end of the fight he has 2 000 viewers yeah there's like the fall notification that's like with the green thing and going middle of the screen he's like green screen imagine it's like yeah i really i really broke out in twitch when uh i restreamed the minx fight and yeah i was just ripping bombs the platform that hosted the event

that they're like a streaming platform that uh like is just less developed than twitch or youtube so they just had unmoderated chat and literally the entire event there's people posting the n-word like like copy pasting like huge walls of the n-word god and somehow making their like your profile picture if you don't have one is just text but they somehow made it a swastika and then they're just posting the n-word the whole event so like i think their moderation is this like uh platform they were like manually they have employees manually making moderations instead of making chat moderators i don't know if they have the the system built and so the people in chat it's like a machine learn program that's like trying to learn to be a better racist it's just getting better at changing the n-word with symbols over time so it started it was just like

vanilla n-word and then by the end of it it's like it's like three lines and then and then and then like unit code like other symbols and they were at a certain point i was just less mad and i was like they're getting creative that's what i had to learn to do early streaming because you put in the band list of words so i just typed in the n-word as many ways as i could think of really i had you did that i had to do this to stop the n-word at all to stop it it was to stop it was to start because you were right you're admitting to typing out it's kind of sounds like you're doing yes you have to type out the slur it doesn't it's not like do you want to stop slurs and then you click check mark yes i would you have to say what words

would you like to have banned and you need to type in a slur why didn't you have someone do it for you what do you want me to do find someone who's black and say hey could i ask you to do a job for me i feel like that's more that's better than you that is way worse than you is there any kind of like maybe certificate or like pass i could have yeah i'm asc certified yeah so you can uh you can say it when it's in a song and you can type it into uh moderation tools when you need to yeah that's the one for a song that's like years because that's that you know that's just for you that's not for like doing something unless you're ninja unless you're ninja then you dropped that off stream crazy you did that we still need to see

ninja's dick we do need to see ninja's we need to meet up with ninja somewhere looks like a smurf in florida i hope it's so hype if he had blue penis hair Yeah Oh Well for you If he knew he was meeting up with you And he wanted to blow your mind And he dyed it Yeah that'd be That'd be money That'd be cash

And we did it too Oh Dude We don't tell him We dye our dick hair blue Oh Blue Man Group Yo And then we start banging

On little drums with him Yeah We bring little drums Yeah We have a tiny timpani drum Right below our nutsack and it's like got water in the rim

and the water pops up and we're just banging our fucking wieners in middle school a sign of being cool was the ability to thrust your hips and then clap your ballsack

on your own ass cheek yeah that was a sign of being cool yeah that's what the cool people would do and I tried to do it really hard

but I ended up just really hurting my nuts and almost getting testicular torsion. Yeah. It's a weird sound that it makes because it's like... Yeah, my friend Michael in middle school

was like really good at it. Could you do it right now? Yeah, I could do it right now, probably. The balls. You mean right now? Go ahead, King. What is his face? Wait, why are you...

He's protecting me. He said, I can't, it's cat face. I can't do it. There's a potato in my lap can't his cat's a bear I can't I can't do it I don't know there's a potato in my lap you wanna see

a fucking show potato you'll get crazy don't show a baby cat cutie walks in I'm fucking I'm like

we're just watching porn just get out I haven't held the cat yet I love this he's like the tiny cat yeah's like a tiny cat Yeah he's a cute cat

He's cute Bless you They do anything And it's cute Damn that's fucked up It is cute yeah It's just in our brains To like this

Yeah What happened? He's looking at his thumb Is this first licks? He's looking at my little thumb First licks ever? First licks I wanna be there

For first licks I get first licks On the cat Like you lick him first No it's like greens right you smoke the cat i get first hit what the kind of mean um i have a better understanding of cutie feels recently why because uh i had a dream about you that was extremely negative and i woke up and i was mad at you what what do you do this time i was like dream londwig is back at it context you've never been mad at me in the real world except for once where i maybe cut you off with a vespa by accident i was mad when you did

that and that's the only time you said you've ever been mad at me yeah you almost killed me like real mad see when you're mad at me it's because crypto went down a bit, but you still have a lot of money. And when I'm mad at you, it's because you almost ran me into a bus at an intersection. I did not almost run you in a... It was like a close call. How fast were you going? Horseshoes and hand grenades. I don't know, like 20?

20 miles? It was like 18. 20 miles, probably. Because I tried riding his moped,oped and i was like this is a little scary i'm not ready for mine goes way faster it is scary yeah the ones we have especially scary when somebody cuts you off when you're trying to make a turn i'm trying to get into the mind of mencia here so imagine you're driving it and there's a car into the ill mind of right and then someone makes you come to a complete stop what was what was the dream

in the dream in the dream we're we're all going uh on a vacation of some kind like i i and for some reason there's like it's not just us it's like it's us and like 200 other people but everybody's like in on the trip and we're waiting at the airport and i don't want to get on the plane right away i want to wait until like the gate is almost close to to board and we're going to this fucking uh this this location in mexico and i can't remember the city um but we're we're going to mexico in the dream we're planning on going to mexico i did actually yeah because you did so i got confused again and i also kind of zoned out which is my fault and i apologize for that that's and that's

okay and i'm not see how i'm not angry wow you're a rational actor and uh but the plate the flight gets canceled and you all come off the plane you you included you're organizing this trip and uh you guys all get on the plane again flight cancels again i've been waiting in the airport for ages and I'm kind of pissed that the flights keep getting canceled, but I'm glad I'm not boarding quickly so I don't have to keep bringing my shit back and forth

like you guys all do because everybody likes to board right away for whatever reason. And finally, I've been sitting alone at the gate for a while because you guys boarded the new flight, the new time to get on.

Three take, Jake. And there's a set time i know when i i need to get on the plane but i realize like it's been like way way too long and i go over to talk to the attendant at the gate and she's like oh they already left i'm like what do you what do you mean like you can't leave before the time that you have listed it's like if you say that time tell your dad you can't do this and i'm like my dad my father my bald would never let this happen this plane that's right you harley built it he built this plane with his bare fucking canadian square hands he he invented flying Canadians have square hands you dumb bitch yeah you wouldn't understand hold on let me eat some that's why they can't turn the plane because their arms only go like this but i find out that you have because the flights to the one city kept getting canceled you have not only uh changed the location of the trip but you have paid the airline to leave early because you're so pissed about the cancellations and you knew that i was waiting but you didn't

want to wait like the extra 10 minutes for me to get from the gate yeah to the to the flight this is how i felt in the dream and you had everybody take off without me and i don't get to go on the trip anymore and i'm just alone in the airport and because ludwig didn't want to wait until the scheduled flight time i am now not on the trip i stand by dream ludwigwig. Oh, me too. Me too, yeah. And then I wake up and I'm furious. I stand by Dream Ludwig. I think Dream Aiden

was being inconsiderate by wanting to wait in the airport so he could sit in his seat for 10 extra minutes when 200 of us were walking in and off and in and off

and in into the plane. And I have to go my ass back out there to get you to come in because you want to sit for 10 extra minutes because maybe it gets canceled. Because the time is listed is listed no the time's listed on the board time to own dream aiden and real aiden with a real story you fucking blonde cocksucker here's why

i was going to new york right last week okay i asked aiden earlier in the day can you take me to the airport okay classic friend maneuver uh-huh you just take people to the airport it sucks and you do it for your friends i've never said no to anyone ever amen says yeah sure i'll take you oh okay i believe him he's canadian i'm okay with that i know i know potato potato's scratching around scratching up he doesn't like what's about to happen it's like and so aiden asked me an hour before i asked to be driven there hey can we just go now that's not what i said i said can do you mind if we leave early that's a better phrasing do you mind if we leave early okay okay and i say yeah i don't want to spend

an extra hour in the airport and i was like why he's like well i'm just gonna be like i'm gonna be driving down to zipper zipper alpha's house yeah i said i wanted to go to i said i was zipper i said i wanted to go to la yeah yeah and uh it's like and i don't want to like and you but he was real pissy about it he was like i just don't want to like hold on then i go and then i got like gotta go really late and it's like and i was like well what the fuck you're putting me in a spot where i literally have to say no hold on you said you would do this and now you have to wait so i just said no i'll just drive myself you put me in a spot where i literally have to say no hold on you said you would do this and now you have to wait so i just said no i'll just drive myself you put me in a spot where i couldn't say i need to clarify something so is this how it went did you so you asked him for a ride he said yes time goes by he approaches you says can we go early at the time he wants to go he approaches

me at like can we go early meaning like right now yes So he functionally says, can we go now instead? Which is fine. That's not what I meant. It's not what you said, but that's not even bad. That's fine. You say, can we go right now? And then did you reply with an attitude? Did I?

Did it make you mad? Did you reply with an attitude or did you say? No, I was deadpan. I was annoyed, but I didn't get mad at him. I was just like, I was kind of stunned. I'm not kidding. I was stunned. I think I've realized

what the problem is here. I cannot tell, just like the previous argument, I can't tell if this story is being embellished for a podcast purposes. I swear to God, it's not.

No, I'm not. Because also, I've never done that. When I'm that angry and I'm retelling a story, that's how angry I was. You've never embellished a story for podcast purposes.

Never. I swear to God. Because to me, it's like i can't tell i i actually just can't read human expressions no i can't tell if you want me to run i i this is the conundrum i'm in right now i because on one hand i could agree with you and and pretend like i was the bad guy in this scenario and selfish or i could push back and actually defend what i think happened which is like like none of what you're describing is how it played out at all oh yeah as long as you do it succinctly in an entertaining way it doesn't matter so so speak your truth because this is what happened i was stunned i was like uh i mean i'd like that's how i was like and i was like wow he's really asking me to do this and i was like, uh, I mean, I'd like, that's how I was like, and I was like, wow, he's really asked me to do this.

And I was like, uh, why? I asked you why? Cause I'm going to like go down there and like, I'm going to be driving late. And I don't, you know,

you kind of like that whiny mode. And then I was like, it's fine. I'll just drive myself. And I, I think this is reasonable because you need the favor. Sure. And he has plans. So he's trying to make both work. He's not canceling on favor sure and he has plans so he's trying to make both work

he's not canceling on you because he has plans he's just saying go an hour early which i don't think is if he said can we go five hours early i'd be like that's yeah it's not lax though it's like it's it's a pretty short airport ride and so i'd have to spend another hour in the airport that i didn't have to which is i'd just rather if he said 30 minutes would you have been like yeah yeah i think so why did you offer that then why didn't i because i'm not i didn't have to which is i'd just rather if he said 30 minutes would you have been like yeah yeah i think so why didn't you offer that then why didn't i because i'm not i don't want to ground i don't want to negotiate he obviously he obviously just didn't want to do it i think he just wanted to no one wants to do it no no but it's like he he was he so much didn't want to do i don't think aiden would ask ever with the expectation of maybe i get out of this

by asking this and then he'll have to say yes or no i think he was just like oh that would actually be very convenient if we could leave slightly earlier because i don't want to get there so late i'll get there like 10 and i'm also driving the opposite direction and so i think he was like well what if we just because he didn't factor this in when he said yes originally what if we leave earlier would you still be mad if when you asked him the first time he said i can go if we leave an hour early absolutely not no okay so it's that he changed because then i'd have to think about it and be like do i want to do that and i have time to think about it but yeah it's the fact that you would have said no to that i probably so i think aiden is in the fault for being too good of a friend for saying yes before thinking oh he cares so

much he didn't even think about what i don't know i take some a w question mark i feel this is reasonable i'm in the wrong i feel like all he did was realize halfway through the day oh shit i actually don't want the day to pan out this way time wise i'll ask if we can go an hour earlier at the time what if he just said i don't want to go an hour earlier but can you still take me would you have said that i'm not going to take you anymore if he asked me to go now basically i said so when you when you say can we go an hour earlier if his response was i don't want to go an hour earlier but can you still take me at the time that we originally said would you say no now with that no i would have said uh yeah that's fine like we can still go

then yeah then all he's asking is just to go earlier yeah but i for an hour i think the idea of asking me to spend another hour in an airport where i have to sit with my own fucking fingers in my butthole as opposed to doing the same thing in your room because i would know right that's how i feel i was busy i was doing but you can stay busy at the airport yeah but i was doing shit at like home i was like i was packing up so i was moving stuff like i i was i was clearly active that day i would argue and so i was like you're the one who needs help hold on i didn't know that i'm assuming also i'm assuming it's not that because when this is all happening it's like past 9 p.m already i'm not assuming you're in the middle of like doing a bunch of shit you know okay i will also add in i remember this conversation because you asked for

it i immediately said no with zero context of when you were leaving. Cause I was like, Oh, we just love to get ramen. We'll probably make it. And Aiden immediately said yes with zero context of when you were leaving. I think. Yeah.

And that just shows how we're different. But you weren't mad at Ludwig. He's that's what I'm saying. Aiden's a better friend than I am in this circumstance. I was mad at you guys because you, you misread the time as well. I didn't misread it. You didn't say the time when I said no.

Oh, that's right. Yeah. So you're dumb. I wasn't home when any of this happened. Yeah, you were. I messaged for us. No, I wasn't home. When you were getting the first message, I got home later.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wasn't home when I read the message. Yeah, I was with you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's why I was like, oh, I can't do this. Guys, look, vote on your phones.

Aiden's a better friend than I am. If you guys face value think Aiden's a better friend, i am if you guys if you guys face value think aiden's a better friend maybe you are in the right but i found it annoying i don't think it's better friend i think that what he did was

fine the reason i was asking to leave early by the way pissy when he asked was not that's maybe that's why i was but i think you're projecting that dude i was i think you'd be

less mad if i did this i wasn't i don't know what to say other than i wasn't i think that's part of this also the reason i asked was because i wasn't like trying to go like fucking hang with the boys or like get some fucking you know minge i was fucking i was i literally i was in like i was in like a personal fight with somebody and it something had just happened in like the last 15 minutes

he was having troubles and uh and it was like it would be it would be like shit it's like it would be really good if i could go over and like figure this out and uh and it's like hey you know what it's like if i can leave earlier like if we can leave at like 9 30 instead of like leave at 10 it's like that would be sick i'm like do you mind leaving early i don't think he owes you all that context though to ask the original question i think he can just ask the question safely and get an honest answer the reason i even asked it that way i said the reason i said do you mind if we leave earlier was because it leaves room for interpret it's like oh okay maybe he can leave at 9 45 instead of 10 or maybe he can leave at 9 30 it's like maybe he can't leave now no no no that's not it because i said when and you said like right now and it was an hour before so it was an hour

and i remember he offered that he offered that as time well i guess i think what he's saying is he would have been okay with less time but still more time nick are you team mr clean or team vanilla ice team vanilla ice right now really yeah i think i'm also vanilla because i if i came up to you and i was doing you a favor i'm putting myself in his shoes if i was if i knew i was doing you a favor i'm like damn i don't want to go to lax or i don't want to go to lax sorry i don't want to go to the airport it's a short it's a way shorter right i don't want to go to the airport right now i'd rather be playing video games but i'll do it because you're my friend i know i'm doing you a favor and i'm like oh actually i had all this editing i want to do tonight and i don't want to

start that at midnight instead of 11 so i'm going to ask if we can leave an hour earlier and i asked you and you got mad at me i would be like that's an overreaction no if you explained why i feel like i would be that makes sense yeah but if i didn't explain why i wouldn't expect you to be mad at me but i would expect you first you would never not explain why but i know but i would i would hope that you would assume as as me being your friend that I had a good reason instead of assuming I have a bad reason. If you were... It's hard.

It's a hard one. You assumed he had a bad reason or bad intention, which is why I said, I don't think you'd be as mad if I did it because for some reason you wouldn't feel that way. I think you're right. But you're quicker to assume he has a bad reason because you think he's like a bad listener. Yeah, I think you're right. I think that's really i have a kelly clarkson blowout i have a bias everyone's voting for this this like i i think this like just quietly seeps into every every interaction you know you are a nightmare what the fuck don't let that get away yes sir he's just

wrong parasocial viewers are gonna freak out in this episode they're all gonna fucking oh my god they're gonna get this course about oh no they're gonna they're gonna fall it's our fault no someone's gonna get on the reddit and be like guys i don't know the vibe right now it's like something's going wrong i'm locked in i'm locked in an all white cell with the kids that were training to fight each other later in 20 years that's that's where i am mentally yeah well vote on your phones it sounds like i lost this one but i still in my heart believe if it was in front of a studio audience people be kind of like hmm that's kind of fucked up and also i didn't blow up you think they'd go oh i didn't blow up at eight and i was just like no i'll just try myself and i was

annoyed but it that's why i brought it up because it was rich dream maiden i guess i'm so rich i think i think that you something that's innocent here i think that you look at going to the airport early with much more disdain than he would maybe yeah yeah because it's just the place that i also think that when people i i'm the kind of guy i think when people ask me favors i am just like that is priority now always always always i never compromise and i never be like hey can we push this back and if i do i feel like shit about it because i never get asked for shit so i'm like maybe it's like easier i don't ask for shit either that's another thing i feel like i'm very independent so if i'm like asking for a thing

and then it gets changed up i'm like how dare you i hope how dare you I hope that my How dare you I hope that my context Of it being important It doesn't make it less annoying Do you want me to back you up? I got you Get me Get him Ludwig Lay up right now Tap me in

What's up? You're fucking dead to both of us For going up In the middle of a poker game To Alexandre Botez And then flagging What hand I have When Sykuno's still in the pot

I didn't see him Freeway He's so Dogpiling me He's so quiet Your dog pot i didn't see way he's so dog piling he's so quiet your dog how could i see his hand he's so quiet your dog in a corner and you help sycuno and botez out but okay well to be fair but you sucked out he owed sycuno i owed sycuno and then you sucked out on me and he owed alexander botez for calling our shill i was a hero that was me what do you owe you for being like a terrorist in my life

no are you kidding me I'm not for being the reason you can't re-stream DCT anymore yeah no I

dude my injury has prevented me from talking shit on Riot so much that I think we're back in there back in Riot

yeah I just burned my Activision bridge so I hope that's good what'd you do I've just made a mogul mail about how they're the worst video game company of all time that's good. What'd you do? I've just made a mogul mail about how they're the worst

video game company of all time. That's the title. The worst? It is pretty clickbaity. Gotta read it. Do you believe that, that they're the worst? I think they are.

It's got EA? It could have been. I think they're worse, yeah. Oh, I was about to say Blizzard, and then I was like, they own them. They do. I watched a movie last night.

I have a test for you, too. Okay. It's a shitty netflix movie uh-huh and it's a it's a comedy about a cheerleader in high school in 2002 who gets into a coma for 20 years and wakes up in 2022 okay now emerging from this coma she's like a normal person but like she needs like basic shit to explain to her so she's like so she's like 29 she's the she's like 37 wait it's been 20 years oh it's been 20 years but she has the mind as if she was still right 17 year older in senior year of high school okay but she needs to be caught up with the world so like she sees an iphone she's anthony she's yes she sees an iphone she's like what's that it's a rebel wilson she's australia she's like what's that oh my god it's an iphone whoa it does it does movies it's fucking crazy news what do you think australia the one of the first things they have to explain to her is

like in the world i guess i call this to a t wait the first thing they have to explain the first things one of the first things the first thing was the iphone but like after that why is everyone wearing a mask no there's no covet in this okay that's i but fair um the first thing they have to explain to her they have to explain to her why we can't say a certain word her first line is the only funny part of the movie she goes oh my god you're being so retarded yeah okay yeah and then they sit her down in the movie they're like okay so like actually you can't say that she's like oh that's gay good that's pretty good and i have a secret theory that they made it start in 2002 because they didn't want to explain 9-11 wait oh yeah she

goes into the coma in 2002 she goes into the coma in 2000 and she pops out in 2022 they're like okay yeah there's too much so terrorists i think that's smart yeah i think there was that that guy that got really mad at uh that pixar movie or that dreamworks movie whatever it was a kid's movie it's called uh it's the panda one it's turning red it's the new pixar movie oh yeah in canada it's in canada in 2002 yeah and they're like there's just no mention of 9-11 and it's just like a cultural event some guy's all mad about it everyone dunking on this person on twitter it should be like a like a moment that like should at least be brought up yeah dude youtube

youtube uh criticism has gotten to a very weird and evil point i think there's like i watch dark souls videos a lot and there's a lot of trash and there's like your vati videos and you're like brother's code you're good shit right but then there's people are like this is my six hour review of dark souls and it's like brother i love that game there's nothing that you don't need to talk for six hours about this there's that one youtuber uh fuck i don't know their name they do like they do like nine hour reviews of like drake and josh and like okay well that's just funny we have single episodes of like no like the series like they'll do like okay fuck what zipper can you find this they i i've only heard positive things

about this youtuber i haven't watched a single video because what am i fucking it's all day it's yeah it's literally i legally have to take a lunch break yeah i'm gonna watch the whole video you you should get paid too. Yeah. I think there's an inverse relationship. I get an hour of overtime. With like, if the more goofy the subject matter is and the longer, the thing is there's a relationship to how funny the whole concept is, right?

Yeah, yeah, for sure. If it was like 24 hours and it actually is all unique video, it's like, damn. Yeah. That's pretty funny. I don't care what they say. There was this really old blog on Tumblr. It was a family guy reviewed and it was this unemployed guy who just smoked weed and he reviewed every single episode episode did i say family guy yes it's full house i just that was a brain which is

the family guy live action yeah which is people actually don't know it was full house reviewed which is way funnier because it's like a shitty sitcom and he's just he's just dumping on full house talking about how much he hates it every single episode it took him like three years to finish it was great i liked full house well you want to talk about your little endeavor you've been on or you're not leaking that yet oh i stole it so it's not that interesting oh i didn't know you saw it uh would you steal this time anthony put me on to a pod about a list pot about list list they're pretty funny they're funny uh and one of them i don't it's one of those podcasts i actually get now people who like comment on ours with like this

huge like uh like gaps in their knowledge because like i listen to that podcast now every once in a while um but i don't know any of the people or what they look like or any of their names i don't know who's talking in my head they're all adam friedland yeah because they all kind of sound like adam friedland uh and so in my head i haven't seen any so i just imagine three adam friedland's on the the couch like this uh like it's fortnight washed um and uh one of them has a letterbox account where he only writes like reviews that are not real and it's just like he'll just take really good movies and call them fucking snooze fest and like like have reviews that are like yeah i slept through the entire beginning to end of the

movie i hated it like that kind of stuff um and i made i made a letterbox account immediately after uh called bring back hip-hop and uh and all i do is write reviews and my guy is a guy who just saw death note and can't resist comparing it to every movie he watches so it's like like he just watched like everything everywhere all at once he gave it two stars and he's just like he's just comparing it to how like i see the death note vibes that everyone's talking about uh but like didn't like what's all the bagel shit so weird was it was this before after what i told you that was you what i was linked me a random letterboxd with no context yeah i just linked it to him i want to see what he'd say and he replied yeah i i well i read i click on it i was busy i was at

summit yeah i have one avengers endgame review five or four stars and it just says wow four out of ten yeah so this is a side product of mine right now this is a no one leak because you were watching you started watching spy family with atrioc and i watched the first couple episodes with you guys and i i just we started watching it and i was just watching it from the perspective of a guy who is convinced that this show is death note and i was like oh that's oh that's l that's how i like that guy he's really good in the first half he was doing this when a truck was like slowly fucking losing his mind it's not funny okay it's not funny i thought it was funny the first time but we're like 15 minutes into the first episode and i'm like so that light's gonna find the book now light's gonna find the book and i'm doing this for the entire episode

is there is there a point in the show where like an apple is shown on camera no you start freaking out that way that's operation fucking zero we're going nuts there uh atrioc he when he gets met dude atrioc's so funny because if he gets super annoyed with you he's so uh he's so bouncy he'll be like what are you doing that for like he'll always book end things with a little laugh like yeah it's funny it does give you a shit sandwich so you just imagine him get lexi like why do you keep doing that and you're like that's l oh i get it yeah he laughs he's like you gotta stop yeah this bit definitely inspired me i i thought it was so good because me and aim were just like being this guy to each other for a moment we're spending like 20 minutes just being

this guy it's like we're watching like any movie and we're just like it's not like death note but it's pretty good this is the visual medium uh version of the guy who just found out about the weekend yeah yeah it is very similar to that it's like it's like yeah i see what it's like kind of like a like a l light yagami like kind of dynamic that they're establishing and i i can feel that inspiration but it's already been done his friend he he clearly doesn't have his best interest he's kind of like ryuk he's kind of like it's kind of like the death god he's like always always around him but he doesn't really care about him oh that guy loves apples does love i love that shit hey oh we're all the red carpet for you king i want to hear about ludwig jr oh you want to hear about what lovely junior did yeah why did

mango post that photo did you fucking ludwig jr money match zane and a best of five the ludwig jr is nick's jigglypuff this is the picture this is check mango's twitter and i check and it says that jay mook has a hairy asshole and then he's like oh not that and then and this is the fucking picture yeah so this is me standing over zane uh what i'm literally saying to him is you baby ass boy ass i said i said one of the greatest to if not the number one player in the world right now i said you baby ass boy ass baby ass i kept saying that over and over and looping it uh because uh at the after party i i cornered zane i was like you want to play melee with me and he's like you want to play i'm like yeah and we the whole event we've been talking about puff and how much we both love playing Puff.

And he's like, have you ever seen Big Kid do that thing where he's like, oh my god, you way that shit? And he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, dude, so we're both just like gawking over Puff. And so we sit down and we both like, neither of us are picking a character. We're just like kind of sitting there like feeling each other out. And I'm like, so your Falco good? He's like, my Falco is really good.

And I'm like, all right. I pick Puff. And he goes, Falco. And then he's like, best of five. I'm like, yeah all right i pick puff and he goes falco and then he's like best of five i'm like yeah yeah and we play and my puff beats him above beats his falco and that's not even that photo i beat him and i'm making fun of him and i'm like what is that ludwig jr's taking fucking w's then we played a couple we played like one like one like one in the middle which was like uh we like we like switched or something or like i played whatever and we played i lost one and then i was like play my peach right now and it goes back to falco and i played peach it was game five last stock and i won with peach against his falco against his falco and then i get up over him i'm on top of him like you baby

ass fucking boy and i won in a cool way like i had like a sick edge guard and uh it was and mango is just like mango looks like uh when your mom's taking a picture of you at thanksgiving he's holding the phone like this so mango's wasted he's like this and he just takes he just takes like what looks like a photo and he goes down like this and then he immediately after i win he goes check twitter right now he said he said if you ever come out with an album you gotta use this use this photo. Was it for money? It's really good. It was full pride. It was a pride match.

Did you try to play your Falco against his puff? Yeah, yeah. I lost that one. That's what I figured. He's nice. His puff is really good. His puff is better than mine for sure. But the whole time he was playing my puff, every single time I would do anything, he

would say, dude, we're the same puff. He would say, dude, you are the exact same. He's like, I would do that there too. dude we're the same puff he would say you are the exact thing i would do that there too he just kept saying it mid-match that's cute we both just do like cheesy like power shield rest out of shield yeah you go for goofy shit yeah yeah because your game i was watching zane's puff play leffen and zane's puff was like fucking leffen up it's fox and then leffen figured it out but but for a while he was fucking leffen up and i was like dude your pup is insane oh yeah so uh that's my biggest w that is absolutely massive it's also funny that you're not put like it's like yeah that wasn't even the only one yeah you know there's two there's two w's in there

so do you have a chance of winning falco ditto then i think i would have won the falco ditto for sure yeah yeah if i won the peach did it if the peach did it the peach did it yeah and then i think the bird should someone ice the Ice Queen took it on? Who was it? Who was behind us watching? It's like Vish was just like, oh, do you play Peach now? And Mike is watching. He starts laughing.

He's like, no. He's like, he doesn't. You should give him four of your one-handed Peach stocks to his one Falco. I don't think I can do it. You can't do one-handed Peach? No his one falco i don't think i can do it you can't do one-handed dude his falco was owning my peach i just squeaked it out i actually don't know how i want it uh but the whole time during the peach puff match he just he every time i take a stock he'd be like don't talk about on the podcast i don't want to be on the podcast what's up what's up baby ass boy ass zane after

the event i was like i'm talking i'm yelling i'm talking over him he goes dude i got fifth and i'm like i lay off i'm like all right i'm sorry man i don't know he's just never beat ludwig or ludwig jr ever and i don't think ever will well i learned from learning the greatest same i learned from the greatest i think i think it is it is because he's a fucking youtuber he's a fucking normie compared to zane now one stock to four do you remember how don't beat me in it do you remember how mango said he would never watch me play melee do you know about that probably yeah so mango told me he would never watch me play melee and i was like why and it's because he thinks i play he like he has heard from others like brandon uh like thinks like the way i play falco is cool

and he heard that from brandon he was like i think you're so lame at every other video game that i don't want to see you do anything cool ever so i'm not i'm gonna ignore you play melee for the rest of my life and i was like yeah okay fair uh but at summit i'm playing puff versus mike and he comes up behind me he's like all right nick let's see what you got he thinks i'm falco and i go i'm like and then he sees like wait let me junior he's like, all right, Nick, let's see what you got. He thinks I'm Falco. And I go, I'm like, and then he sees like, wait, Ludwig Jr. He's like, are you Puff? And I'm like, yeah. He's like, oh my God, fuck you.

And I'm like, I don't want you to watch this one. And then we're like 10 seconds into the game and he goes, oh, oh shit. Oh fuck. And Mike's like, no, no, walk away. And then like, I like, I like miss a setup or something. And then Mango pops off at me missing something that almost could have been cool. And's like he didn't even hit it and then he goes like it's all about ideas that's such a big voucher it was just w's after w's mango watching your set behind or your friendly behind you is like the biggest pressure ever because it's like well i got i gotta be cool

mike just watches me go from playing real melee to to like only trying to be cool for Mango like immediately. It was a light switch. What's up? He's nervous. I'm just squishing him around. We should hot potato the cat. I don't love that. I just want to see if QD's still listening.

Question for you guys. Have you ever tried you know within your memory have you ever tried breast milk yeah of course wait are you asking me if i as are you asking if i was breastfed as an adult both of these okay there's two things that happen in my head right now one aiden's positing this question as if he's about to tell us that he just did and what do we i didn't say that but it sounds like that too ludwig's saying absolutely is also crazy. You lock us in so hard.

That's what they call French milk. Yeah. At the store, it's just breast milk. It's just calcium, not breast. Listen. It's not two percent.

It's just by size. Some woman named Francine just has a massive and she just fills their bottles for your corner store. They're labeled by cup size in France. It's not percentages. This is the only way to get a hold of breast milk,

human, right? Yes. Okay. Is you have to be pregnant or you have to buy it. I could get a hold of breast milk with any y'all if I squeeze hard enough. Don't you remember me lactating? No.

What? You don't remember me lactating? Wait, what? What year? I think 2018. He was not too naughty. I want to say Ben or Miles is over, and they pinched my nipple so hard that a little bit of juice came out.

What? No way. That was probably just like sweat. Yeah. I don't know. I mean, it's urine ball. If you squeeze your homie's tit and juice comes out, you should be obligated to try it. Yeah.

I tried my own tit. That should be a lot. Yeah, and you earned earned it so does that count why are you asking yeah let's get to the you just said you tried it i thought i was like yes i have had breast milk but i don't necessarily remember it because i was a baby yeah that's why i said within your memory that you're like as in like do you do you presumably you do not remember drinking from your i don't even know if i was breastfed actually my first memory was pilo if i said that you'd be mad now i know if you said you drink my mom's breast milk that's way different than if i'm saying i did as a baby because he said we went to new hampshire that's

what i'm saying that's fine because he's talking about breast milk but if i said paloma's tit. We went to New Hampshire. That's what I'm saying. That's fine. It's just Paloma's breast milk. But if I said Paloma's tit, you'd get all mad at me. Stop it. It's because you're closer to fucking her because you're so fucking old. When she said goodbye, when she said goodbye, she all offered some.

It's like, it's rude to say no on some. She asked if she could make me anything. I'm not going to say no to your mom. That's a New Hampshire tradition. I'm not going to stop. So it's a French thing and a New Hampshire tradition. She said, do you want some milk? Do you want some milk with your live

live free or die that's right she was all in her like angry voice too like you like she's kind of annoyed like do you want something so the road does she know she she has to offer yeah she still hates you by the way no she doesn't he does go ahead no why are you asking i tried it i did try what this week who's i can't sell out my source is it from the source i tried i tried it did you drink it from the bottle or from the tap from a bottle that's better what the fuck is going on that's what made it turn blonde i tried formula too i tried both well you just hung out with someone with a baby and got nuts well they offered dude what the fuck are you doing baby watching okay hold on i didn't do it in front

of the baby like haha i'm eating your lunch today let's reel let's reel it back yeah how was it yeah okay so normal breast milk as opposed to as to... As opposed to formula. Crazy breast milk. As opposed to formula. Mike's hard breast milk. It's really sweet. It's like weirdly sweet. Like house, like give me a ring. Like macadamia milk? I feel like

almost like condensed milk. It's actually like surprisingly... You can make Vietnamese coffee with breast milk. Yeah, they do actually. Dude, it's called Thai teaietnamese coffee with breast milk yeah they do actually yeah tie tea with breast milk you don't tell the difference that's what tie tea is shit i should stop ordering that that's unethical formula formula honestly it tastes like fucking metal like it tastes terrible okay that's good given the me iron tastes like shit is it so formula is what they make in a lab yeah yeah formula is the science and how they make fun of formula formula babies you like bully them do they make like synthetic tits and they milk them how do you get formula

powder i don't they make it in a in a lab like a really hard math equation yeah and then you just the juice just comes out of your ears it's a fucking station next to the dogs. I don't know. It's somewhere in the same building. There's a movie called... Fuck, I forget what it's called. But it's like this future where vampires have taken over the world. Like the natural progression.

Like Death Note? It's like Death Note. And there's apples. There's a bunch of Ryuk's. And it's like... There's so many vampires, but there's not enough people. And so they eat fake blood. but the real blood tastes real good. It's a shit movie, but it's a cool concept.

Anyway. It's like that. There's like this. It's not Blade. There's this factory and it's just got humans like being milked and farmed. Yeah. Right. So it's like the Matrix in Blade kind of.

Yeah, kind of. Yeah. And I'm just imagining that, but it's like, it's just like Warren the janitor And his big beautiful tits Just being milked And milked And milked Over and over And over

And that's what you buy At the store Dude there's a formula shortage You drank that Yeah There's a formula shortage And I got a piece Damn

That's That's evil One baby This is like Hunger Games One baby died Because of my actions this week I'm proud of you But I had to do it

To try For science For science And it tasted bad Because no adults ever tried before and i wanted to be the first also would you really be a brand no it's like the name of the thing it's just the name of baby baby milk oh maybe it's like what if it was a brand that turned into like a comic place like kleenex yeah like kleenex trying to climb baby formula i'm gonna look this up bro it'll be good bro so wait is that it we hit a 90 I feel like you should just

You drink breast milk Just tell us why you Like what the context is Is it too secret? No I wanted to know What it tasted like And it was there Did you ask or did they offer?

They offered They offered Do you think that's normal? No No I was like This is another woman's breast milk That you're like signing off On me tasting

Do you feel like that's okay? Wait what? What? Weird scenario what the fuck is going on it was a back alley deal whoa whoa wait what'd you say he she did not drink it with the mother's consent what the fuck i literally think is a crime in some starbucks you don't just get to have milk if you get the riddle the day right you get it it's like oat milk it's like it's like super casual yeah like not a big deal so weird like fairfax they offer that well hey yardigans if you've had some breast milk would you go back would i more would i try it again back for seconds no because now it feels like i'm taking but like if assuming that breast milk

ran rampant like waterfalls would you then would i would i would i order it like if i get it in my coffee yeah were you like i don't kind of try this again no it's a little too sweet really it's a little weird but it doesn't taste bad it doesn't taste bad yeah i like my uh i like breast milk but sweetened with monk fruit you know so there's not a lot of calories sure that's why it did pique my curiosity because i was like this probably changes depending on what the person eats yeah they eat a bunch of garlic pineapple tastes good what i'm trying to say this tastes like the woman got into a milk patch lactating women watching the podcast so i can't figure i can't find the answer for why it's called formula but i did find where formula started and it was just this dude who made it and he called it justice von liebig soup for infants why did we change that that sounds like

one of aiden's steam names dude we should keep calling it that that's pretty hard you're gonna say there's any women out there who have breast milk yeah if there's any women who watch the podcast you happen to be lactating you happen to be a little bored send me on over yeah what what tell them what's the call to action you're bored and lactating and in wilshire join the patreon because you're gonna love the bonus episode we have a discord channel for you thanks everybody for watching this week all right then see you later that's amore