The Yard - We moved.

Episode Date: December 8, 2022

Welcome to Season 2 of The Yard! This week, the boys talk about the new season, the upcoming chess boxing event and how everyone has switched up.

A three two one It's like old times like it's like the same as it was Welcome to the Yeah It's like old times like it's like the same as it was Yeah Everybody I'm gonna beat you up in front of your friends. Yeah, you like that my assholes just loosened up and I'm in the club What's a proper I'm not, I'm not a drug guy. Two.

Oh. Electric Boogaloo. This is the season where we get heavy into big drugs. This is the season where we kill one person. This is the murder mystery season. That's kind of cool. That actually could be the season. We could get really into drugs, me and you. You already did that season one.

Specifically, me and you, Slime. Nope. Wasn't the drug guy I wanna get fucking I wanna go to hell on earth But in my mind Isn't that fun sounding? Let's rein it in for a moment boys

We are at season two of the yard At our new set Oh look at dude Look at your big legs Your big chunky legs I know Oh my god Dude you look like

You look like the way Shuby draws you For real. Like a goose. Okay, your legs look good. I won't lie. Now you're trying to flex. Now you're trying to flex.

I'm not trying. I am flexing. I'm feeling it. It's all flat. It's all flat. It's not flat, bro. It's flat. Okay.

Look at all that. You're so heavy. You're actually so toned. Apocalypse, four of us left. We have to eat Lubbock first, right? Because none of us can take him on alone. So if it comes down to like a 1v1 scenario he's gonna win

so the three of us the three of us must take him down and then use his meat you think the three of you have a chance I would love to wear his skin like a wet jacket you should be in prison for thinking that we can mount

mount your head on the beach like the pig. Like the pig head on the snake. So like I was saying, season two of The Yard. And we moved. We have a new cool house. Did you think it was cancelled? That's not true.

Mr. Feeny from Boy Meets World is in that window right now. Fallen and dying. He's piping. He's piping and he had a heart attack because of cory i'm piping is that gonna be the new i'm piping right now that's good that's good our neighbor is always piping at all times yeah also mr feeney also mr feeney yeah not the adrian i think he's still alive actually no shot False I don't know what you're talking about Yeah we get it bro You never watch fucking movies

I'll connect to them Boy meets world The Avengers Endgame Yeah You know how they The Thor got fat And played Fortnite Yeah

Yeah He played Fortnite And it was funny Because he plays Fortnite Like we do Yeah It's like that Like with the kids do

I hope that helps Yeah bro He was born in 19... He's 95 and he's alive. 95? I told you, my goat stands tall. That's impressive. The goat stands alone.

That's when Ludwig was born. 95, true. Yeah, that's true. The year. Well, anyway, we're here. We're all together again. Do you think we switched? What do you mean?

Are you basically asking... I hate when he does that. I know. I hate when he asks you guys a fucking stupid question and then looks at me. Hey. I know who did. I don't know about us, but I know who did. Nick Engling?

Nick Engling. Nick Engling switched. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What do you mean switched? He switched me. Oh, you don't know? No. Oh, really?

No, is he gay? Really? He switched. He switched. He does wear that fucking sweater all the time. Like switched up? Like changed up on you? Yeah, he switched up on us. Why? He's Southpaw now.

What? Hanging out with big time streamers instead of us. Is that gay? I haven't played games with him in weeks. Flipping on his stream all the time. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Aiden, you are the one who switched up. Oh, that's true. You also did switch. I switched up.

You're wearing that big fucking coat. I don't like that. The Canadian Michelin man. That I've had. That I have had. You look like that Tom Brady meme where he's sitting down on the bench with a coat. You look like my small intestines.

Don't watch fake football, so don't know what you mean. Okay, well, why do you watch real football? Canada's not in it. You look like Spinelli from Recess. My other nationality is also out. Like a melted Flintstones pooch pop. What is this? No, dude, don't bring that out.

No one fucking cares. Did you bring this for the World Cup? Dude. No one fucking cares. Also, why do you wear those Canadian shoes everywhere? It's so weird. Stolen Valor. Wait, why are they Canadian shoes? It's Stolen Valor.

No, no, no. The ones from the shoot? I wore them twice ever. You wore them at the Christmas concert. Yeah, that's one of the two times. It was so weird. Why? They were festive.

They were red. In the comic, that's how you know who he is. They were festive because they had maple leaf, which is a winter tree. It was so, no, it's just very, so that's, that's festive. He looks festive as hell. Yeah, he does look festive. You have to give that to him. He looks festive.

He looks festive. I don't know why you're fighting that. have to give that to him. He looks festive. He looks festive. I don't know why you're fighting that. I think that he doesn't look festive because that's a national flag. I looked good. Yeah. You're pretending I didn't, but I did. And I know I did. I looked good on the Christmas concert and I crushed my song.

Did you? Yeah. What song you do? Your own song? A Christmas song. Oh, he did the song. Which I wrote. It is his now, I guess.

I did write it. You did. You and Mariah Carey, the goats. Why do you and mariah carey the goats why do you think mariah carey wrote that i'm like mariah carey is she not right fucking all come on oh no wait oh a christmas song is that king all i want for christmas okay that's not her song right it's just her cover of it is really popular no that's her song it's her song i mean someone else might have wrote it for her but it's her song yeah the original performance of that time yeah 100 i mean 1000 i don't i'll do this she goes i'm mariah carey i wrote this mariah carey i thought it was a cover this whole time i want of like a

other version but you think you just never have ever heard the other version ever that version got so popular but you would have heard the other version at one point in your life. Eminem, Ghost Road. I think I assumed a lot of Christmas music. I put it in this corner of my mind where it's like classical music

where the original rendition is sort of just this ethereal thing that was written in old times. Nobody can see your face right now. It's pissing me off.

What? Are you kidding? Yes, it is written by Mariah Carey and a guy named Walter Afanassieff Oh the guy from Breaking Bad You have a problem with not seeing my face

That's very secular in French review What does that mean? The French outlawed the use of like The what do you call it? The burqa Oh In public spaces Why?

Because you can't see their face. You can't see their face. Because women are beautiful. Because why would you hide it? You're so pretty. You're so pretty. You're so beautiful. It's classic romantic French. And then to make it even, you also can't wear

a Christian chain in school. Like a chain with a cross? Yeah, real even on that one. They're about equal, I would say. Could you wear like a chain of the cross yeah really even on that one they're about equal i was could you wear like a star of david chain you can't so you can't i think the point is that that you know i'm not an expert on secularism in france but it feels like they might be a little bit islamophobic and then tried to be like, see, they can't wear the chain. Yeah, that's what they did.

That's what it feels like a little bit. As the French representative, as the French delegation, do you think that's okay? I would say to this, we'll see you in the World Cup. The World Cup. France number one. Mbappé. Mbappé. Are they still in?

Yeah, they're playing England Saturday. Bro, I was watching today, watching Portugal. I was like, oh, 1-0. Gotta go to a meeting with Aiden. Go in this 30-minute meeting, come out, it's 4-1. I was like, what happened? You know what's tight is that Ronaldo wasn't playing for any of that.

He's a really good soccer player. His name's Cristiano Ronaldo. He's one of the two best of uh of all time so many syllables in a man's name i don't like how we treat how how not knowing ronaldo is like acceptable in the same way that like you didn't know what even mr beast's videos were because even mr beast pales in comparison to Ronaldo. Ronaldo has 500 million Instagram followers. Bro, you didn't even know what Boy Meets World was.

True. That's the Ronaldo 90s TV. It is equal to Ronaldo. Mr. Feeny is like messy. Mr. Feeny piping right now in his 95-year-old dick. When Corey Matthews banged Topanga for the first time that was like Cristiano Ronaldo's hat trick don't go what you're

talking about it was a crazy episode you play Sonic what? you didn't even play Sonic I can't Sonic which Sonic? Topanga's like Rouge

did you play Sonic? no Topanga's like Amy you're dumb what the fuck is the matter with you? no Topanga's not like Amy Topanga's literally like Amy you wanna fuck Amy

when you were a kid? well you don't wanna fuck Topanga when you were a kid you shouldn't wanna fuck any of the characters from Sonic. What about Rouge? That is an overstatement. That's dumb. What about Rouge?

You're dumb. You're dumb for that. Rouge, they gave her boobs. She had more polygons than any of them damn cats. Zipper, can you pull a picture of Rouge? Actually, we got to stop talking about the Sonic characters because last time we found out Amy is canonically 12 years old. Yeah.

Rouge is canonically 19. What is Rouge? Wait, you're saying what is Rouge? She's a bat, right? No, she's like a bat cat. We need to find out how old Rouge is. That's your first step.

This is priority number one. She's Rouge the bat. Okay, and you're telling me it's ridiculous. It's ridiculous to think about this Rouge In any way I don't think bats should know how to put eyeliner on for one Right Bro we're friends with Dawson

Rouge Sonic Age Don't look search 18 That is such a weird specific age Wait birthday is March 1983 18 so she's old as hugs oh bat years bat years bat years train wrecks is gonna have you put a 50 cal bullet in your head you're so you guys reserve your username he's not gonna kill me i'm not that on kick i didn't secure my username yet you know i'm ludwig i don't but i'm gonna hit him up for it okay amen that would be nice when i started imagine crypto imagine on their streamings you can like bet

on outcomes and streams like we can be in chat i'd be like five bucks he fucking clutches this oh that'd be so it'd be really easy to launder money yeah yeah they'd be tight yeah i think uh that's what bits was originally started as right laundering yeah but from a cartel scar scar has ties to the cartels and was like i've got to get rid of this cash somehow yeah 100 he's like i just imagine scar like trying to explain bits to like a guy with an ak-47 yeah and then and then 10 years later jason bateman plays scar in the Netflix show. Dude, what's funny is in the middle of all the drama with the Smash Panda thing, Scar's YouTube account got taken down. He's like, it's Panda.

Dude, he's... I'm like, you are very overestimating the reach that Panda has on YouTube. Yeah, Panda can just shoot videos down day one. Yeah, and then YouTube's like, we have to comply. I think that's crazy for that to happen and you not to delete it, right? Well, I think it's fine to leave it up and say i was wrong it's more like yeah it's it's that's fine i i i was kind of annoyed because like the there was like that emergency like podcast with all like the the like blur and and shit and taffo and like sheridan and then it was like people in the

chat were like scar's gonna say scar where's scar we need him and it's like he smokes more weed than that to kill a horse you know what i'm saying that means he's thinking about things yeah that's how he meditates bro you guys for some reason they think that scar is like actually a fucking like a guy who has it together bro he just does it and then the next day well i was so annoyed no i'm mad you're dumb you're dumb. You're dumb. You're dumb. It's hater energy. It is hater energy. Yeah, that's fine. Because people just don't understand that he's like, he's so like checked out and he smokes enough weed to kill barn animals.

And then the next morning, he was like, wait, you guys like summoned MIOM without me? And they're like, yeah. And then he's, and then it was it's like wait you already did the podcast like yes dude like what the fuck like yeah this can't be this can't be our champion why not what do you want to have taffo be the one to deliver the speech that's supposed to allow us the community literally yes i think you just are bad at judging who's a good orator then i think the problem is let me be the slime translator anger translator sure i think slime would like the guy who is making the community speeches that empower and pump everybody up to be somebody that knows

who slug it i don't think that's what you want i think that's dumb to say I think it's fair for the spokesperson in the community to know the players who are top 10 in the world I don't think Joe Biden knows the past Super Bowl winner it's like if Scar was like we'll never let them take our football away and then was like who's Mbappe he's pretty fast

the fact that our guy is a guy who's like they took down my YouTube channel that's such a bad word if Vish said some shit pretty fast the fact that our guy is a guy who's like they took down my youtube channel it's like that's such a fucking that's such a bad no if like all right if vish said some shit right and let's say vish no slug like everyone in chat's gonna be like why is the guy wearing like a purse as like a jacket but if scar if scar comes out and he's like did i just walk up slowly and nintendo canceled us everyone's gonna clap and be like that should do something that's what I have a problem with you know one thing I do my number one

like micro complaint about Scar is I have rewatched grand finals of Smash Summit 11 so many times because it is so sick like it is so incredible that that tournament and that finals happened and there's this moment in the 10th game

as Mango is about to win the tournament where Scar just absolutely biffs the history of the two players in like the last stock situation. And like he basically goes on in this like run-on sentence that just doesn't end. And it just sucks all the life

out of this like second to last stock moment because he's trying to build it up into something epic. He's trying to make like a machine sponge-esque like speech about the beauty of this moment. And he just blows it. And then Mango wins off like a stray shine. And it's like the only thing preventing that moment from being absolutely perfect to me. And that's my only scar complaint ever that is that is when you have to step up as like commentary like you bet when

those moments happen because machine would never fuck that up who's a machine machine is like the best csgo caster yeah oh i thought you're talking about you're about to make a play of a lifetime exactly you're about to make the play of your career. Yeah. Oh, my God, bro. Right. Fuck yeah, dude. Look, you just don't care about eSports. It's fine. I like eSports.

No, you don't, man. I love eSports. You like to watch Tyler 1. Yeah. Get the fuck out of my lobby. Oh, my God. That was all right. We have one coming up.

That's kind of cool a little smash tournament he's born yeah it's great why what are you stressed about i talked to a lot of people on main stage like so uh so like where is it they're asking all these questions i'm like i'm like you i i don't know what it's happening i don't know anything well like yeah the background is that the panda circuit in part with nintendo power, aided and abetted in shutting down Smash World Tour. Then everybody got mad at Panda. Then they shut down Panda Cup. And now the only event left is I said I would do an event mostly to take viewership away from Panda Cup.

That was my goal. You know what pisses me off about the Panda statements? They all keep writing in their statements like, we're shutting down Panda Cup for the safety of our staff. Hold on. Let me step in. Let me beat you guys to it. No. That's true and fair.

How? How? Apparently what happened. Apparently what happened. It was me. Some guy doxed Alan and said, if you go through with the final, I'm going to dox all of your employees publicly.

That's crazy. That is employees publicly. That's crazy. That is very fair. That's so annoying, because that's the one thing you don't have to do, and we can all play by a certain set of rules. Yeah. That's just like, we don't want that guy on our team.

It's like we're operating from a point where you're the villain, and then someone's like, I'll fucking murder and rape your wife. And it's like, why are you on our side? That guy's kind of like me okay yeah he's just slime

yeah yeah I get it now yeah it's like sometimes we're on your side but the level of aggression you take I'm like in the cringe forever and ever

I'm like in the cringe let's like yeah and the slime's like we should kill him we should eat his bones and it's like well

hold on now it's no longer fun I want to wear you guys I wanna wear you like three piece suit you know what I'm saying so anyway yeah we do have an event now

do you wait wait wait I wanna finish this the three piece suit thing you wanna finish the three piece suit thing your little sock I want you I wanna wear

when the world ends and we need to eat each other for meat I win right okay so Ludwig's dead first Ludwig's dead first

we eat his delicious legs I start with the thighs and we skin him and each other for meat. I win. Okay. So Ludwig's dead first. Ludwig's dead first. We eat his delicious legs. I start with the thighs. And we skin him. And I, what are you doing? Hey, keep talking about the skinning thing. Dude, Connor's opening your package. Why do you love him so much? Do I have to listen to the skinning thing?

Why do you love Connor so much? I love Connor. Why? I love Connor. Do you only love him because he's clouded? He's not that clouded compared to you. Do you only love him because he's... Wait, which Connor that clouded compared to to you only love him because he's wait which which connor is this uh c-dog v.a. connor dog voice actor i can't believe you

pulled out your phone i pulled out this is insane okay sorry go back to the skin thing no no no no we're gonna finish with your little phone we have socks i think you were like a shoe okay oh sorry my shoe i'm gonna wear your body like a jacket okay and your skeleton will be my pillow guys we have a slide and it'll be a three-piece suit all right anyway sorry you were saying welcome to the demonetized podcast what are you talking about season two you said you said a bad word earlier where are you going why is everything falling apart we're not falling we're fine he's going down the house dude what the don't go inside because you're oh we have a cat door yeah cat door doggy door oh it just seemed narrow cat is that a thing people have cat doors yeah i had an outdoor

cat growing up we had a little cat cat we don't have a cat door but we had a farm oh here he comes yo there with his smart smart little time that costs a hundred thousand dollars and he half-cheeked it you smell like alcohol are you you're drinking alcohol while you work? Is this new? What are you, sipping cash now? Wait, let me wear your big weird coat. You're going to look so funny in that. You're mad at Yingling for changing up, and you're sipping cash. Oh, you're going to look so funny in that. I figured in season two, I could get a problem. Guys, in season two, I'm going to be an alcoholic.

It's warm. Dr. Evil. It's warm. You look cozy. You look kind of good. I look good in your big weird coat? Don't stretch it too far. Hi's warm. Dr. Evil. It's warm. You look cozy. You look kind of good. I look good? In your big weird coat? Don't stretch too far. Hi. Hey. It's me. Yeah. Coat guy.

Pretend that's our skin suit. So it's nice. You look like a prolapsed anus, dude. What are you talking about? Is this how Aiden feels? No, only when you wear it. You look like a dog's dick that came out. Free driver's license. It's a Washington one. That's fun. Show them.

Show them. Hold on. How tall are you in your license? You're an organ donor? 6'2". 6'2 on the license. I'm 6'3". You don't weigh 150 pounds.

He used to. I did when I got that license. Holy shit. Skin and bones. I was very skinny. You're an organ donor? We know who we're not eating. No.

That's a waste of time killing Aiden to eat. Yeah, it's a waste of time. We'll make him work. I weigh 160 now. We all go against Ludwig convincing Aiden that's going to last us a year. We know it won't. Then we kill Aiden just for like the noise. Yeah.

And then we eat Ludwig over six months. Also, Aiden would be a liability in the apocalypse shelter because it'd be like, hey, you got to make sure that people don't try to come kill us. And he'd be like, have his iPhones or his iPod in. He's looking for bars. And he's looking for, he's like, I think I can get service. And it's like, we don't even know the electricity. Wait, wait, wait.

You're picking one person in this group to be your duo for zombie apocalypse. You're picking Nick? Don't do that. Don't, don't do that. I do pick you because, because you're so strong. I'm your protector. Yeah. You're so strong. I'm your protector. Yeah, you're so powerful. I'm your shield and sword.

Also, I think you're charming enough to where you could charm. Nick can't charm anyone, okay? They meet him. They don't like him. Well, okay. He could charm people, but he doesn't have the strength and the speed and the power. Right. They could kill him.

I provide tactics. You know what I'm saying? What? Sorry. Hold on. Let's jump in. You think you're the waluigi of the cast we're in zombie waluigi's not an engineer by the way waluigi always has the highest tricky

bar in all the games we're in we're in zombie apocalypse it's me and you and we need food what's your trick my trick what's your tactic my one simple trick that doctors hate yeah he tries mud day one doesn't like it thinks it'd be funny so he tries mud he goes. Doesn't like it. Thinks it'd be funny. So he tries mud. He goes, dude, mud is bad. But it would be. He would eat mud, but pretend it's really delicious. And he's like, you gotta try this mud, dude. And he's like eating so much mud.

Like choking it down. Yeah, he's like, I can't get enough of this mud, man. And then I eat it and I realize it's terrible. You've just been eating dirt. Yeah. For a bit. It's probably a diuretic and so i would what i would do is i would find another clan another group of people well and i would steal

from them good tactic hold on so you would find a clan and then you would steal i would steal from the clan who's doing this you wouldn't bring it home to my wife you wouldn't go to like a grocery store you'd find a clan dude how many people have already gone to the fucking trader joe's to clean it up all the clans that's why he's my tactician because you would be at the grocery store and we would be stealing from you so oh it'd be so fucking free i'm so free you guys don't know where i am anymore yeah you'd be you're on your own in this scenario well are you i try to align with anthony are you the danny mcbride of this apocalypse scenario? You guys find me later

I've got a guy on a leash Day one you're dead Day two you're dead Or you're someone's beautiful little like fuck dog You're a skin dog Like a new pet You become someone's apocalypse dog You're only allowed to bark

He actually kind of fucks with it He's like I'm a dog now It's fine Dude kibbles again fuck I'm going to heaven I'm getting sucked out of the world You checked off every sin box Number one you're Canadian

You're gay You've got all the Christian ways you go to hell. Figure it out. You have to explain to St. Peter, like, yeah, so no, I do like both. I like both. And he's like, what? Yeah, but I sang your song in that Coldplay song every time it came on. Why won't you?

Did you think I sang good? What's up? Did you think I sang good? I think you sang. I think you sang. I sang in the party. Whoa. We did the Christmas concert.

I was so fucking nervous. I don't believe that that's a riff-raff song. It is. Wait, was it Husky? Yeah, Husky. I snuck in. I was like, cutie, let me sing this. It's a Christmas song.

She's like, no, it's not. And then I showed her the lyrics, and he literally talks about coming downstairs on December 25th. Oh, yeah. And I'm like, mm-hmm. I thought it was a christmas song and i thought you sang it well no you did good i thought you sang it well i thought you you you had a timbre to your voice oh you had a drawl i was freaking out i was with radstads in the back just pacing around what were you nervous about you were nervous i would be nervous i was cool up there for one he was sitting next to yingling three seats away and he switched up so he makes everybody nervous he didn't switch you switch up you drink ipas go down slides and don't

play valo anymore one it's a stout two yeah and he hasn't changed up no yingling yingling makes you nervous because he could switch at any time yeah yeah that's the problem he switches back and you don't know when and you're like yingling you're back then he switches again he's like actually i'm going to hang out with hassan today you know what dude you're learning how to edit dude i don't like this he's making tiktok this is what you were always scared of he is he is the he's the offline tv person it's like it's like the social media person fedmeister leak with yvonne are you talking about Broden? Yes. And everyone was mad at Yvonne for like trying to be a content creator.

And that's what, Yingling's path is. Wait, is it Yvonne a content creator? Yvonne is a content creator, but I think was originally hired as like a PA or something. Oh! And there was that drama document where people were like,

she shouldn't be doing this content. So it is Broden. Broden is the same thing, right? Where Broden was like a fucking shooter. No he's still that. I will prey on Nick Engling's

downfall. He's just a producer. He had a piece and everyone wants a piece. He's just a producer. Broden doesn't do any content.

I remember a long time ago I talked to Ludwig and I was like it's kind of lucky that I don't give a shit about like streaming and stuff and he's like

yeah that's pretty cool. You're hitting him with a you're kind of lucky to have me i i was i'm lucky you never make it no oh i flip on my stream i get fucking 4k i'm good but what i'm saying is we need to stop nick yingo he's not look he's switched fine he did not switch bro dude soon enough he's gonna be great

why don't you start making TikToks for me oh my god this is what's gonna happen this is what's gonna happen we're gonna it's gonna be a few months from now but

we're gonna see a video and it's gonna be on live stream fail and it's gonna be Kai CNET and XQC and Nick Yingling dancing dancing

all getting sturdy and we're gonna wonder how it happened and we're gonna come back to this clip right now and nicky lee it's because nicky lee fucking switched up and ludwig's gonna be like they didn't switch i mean he hangs out with them all the time i'll let each of you strike me across the face it's a it's a boiling frog situation also on the note of kai senat kai senat senat no just, I told you how to say it. You just said Sinaners. Sinaners.

Kai Sinat. Kai Sinaners. It's an homage. The thing with Kai Sinaners is that he, I revoked my streamer of the year award that we talked about a few weeks ago. I think I backed the wrong horse because Speed keeps getting into weird oh that was your horse weird situations and it's funny because i don't think you watch speed you just know that he's like a taste maker influential i've only watched the clips and then you watch it and then you watch a video of him barking at a woman for 20 seconds straight yeah that was actually the video that

first changed my mind and then i watched the one where he screamed Konichiwa 10 times in a row today and I was like Chinese man okay maybe I need to change my aim and streamer of the year speed's half Japanese do you think he is not was it believable though okay no I believe he's 17 speed is half Japanese half Italian yeah and he's he's also 17 so get over it isn't he 18 no 17 isn't he 19 no no you just changed your number twice is he going up is he 20 on desk yeah why do you love c-dog so much conor dog voice actor man why because i feel like if it was between him and me you would shoot me in the fucking mouth with a 44 magnum uh yeah i know i would don't explain that but i'd know you'd eat the bowl it well yeah i

yeah you'd tank it to quote to quote you out of that so beautifully just a week ago ludwig if you need to take me out back and shoo me then that's fine yeah i would let him put it put one in my head i appreciate that but why do you love sea dogs so much i just we have we had a connection we first met we had a connection it was like a spark like a spark it was like a little tingle it's like when we had a connection yeah when we first when we first did commentary like first time you said you're too good to me yeah because i was going i was yes anding yeah it was like that wow sometimes you get a little spark he's a new slime and you know what He has that you don't An accent Hair Deep voice

Yeah He's a going All of it Mental health Yeah Speaks Japanese If we watched a show together He wouldn't like watch

The rest of the episodes Without me I've only did that once You piece of shit Never forget Don't do that Never forget Never forget that

What's the worst thing How has he ever wronged you If at all Honestly I've mostly wronged him What did you do And he always forgives you uh if at all honestly i've mostly wronged him what did you do and he always forgives you true we we promised to get each other i had a content idea i was like you give me a 500 box in japan i'll give you 500 box from america and i was like and we sent it to each other he's like all right i got this big biking trip coming up so it's gonna be tough i'm like

it's all right just get it to me in 10 days he's like oh fuck so he hustles and bustles this box is on my door with an eight when i see it on my door i look down and i'm like oh fuck i forgot about this wow and you gave him the timeline just got the box now i sent him the box two months later he was cycling around japan and you did this before you gotta eat everything in there and then i gave him the box and then he also didn't like my box. I saw you checking on it. Cause my box. You put a gun in it, right?

Well, here's the thing. I don't know if the gun came through. Right. Yeah. I, so you know the gun you bought? I just put it in the box. Yeah. Yingo was telling me, he's like, yeah, I tried to ship this gun and like they were telling

me all these rules and stuff. Yeah. It's a, it's an airsoft gun. You can just shoot that. I don't know if you can. Old Yingling, if he had switched, he would have just shipped it. rules and stuff. Yeah. It's an airsoft gun. You can just shoot that. I don't know if you can. Old Yingling, if he had switched, he would have just shipped it, no questions asked. Old Yingling ships it like it's Silk Road contraband. New Yingling found a toy gun and then stayed strapped.

Mine now. Old Yingling gets paid in Monero and New Yingling reports everything on the books. New Yingling is like four miles north of Virginia. Yeah, New Yingling. New Yingling. New Yingling Township. No, there's no Old Yingling reports everything on the books. New Yingling is like, it's like four miles north of Virginia. Yeah, New Yingling. New Yingling. New Yingling Township. No, there's no Old Yingling. It's a funny thing.

You gotta be from there. Yeah, I work in the New Yingling Department of Corrections. Oh, I was just in Pennsylvania and they have Yingling shirts everywhere. That's where the beer was made. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was just like, it's like a big thing to wear a Yingling shirt. They spell it with an E. Yingling.

It's delicious. It's delicious It's a good light beer with a YouTube smooth taste. Do you know it? What's the younglings middle name? Yeah, it's Nick No, it's real first name Adam. That's not true. It's it's I literally onboarded him. I just don't remember its name It's Andrew name yingling I think I know it William Isn't it Nicholas? Isn't it William? No his middle name

Is not Nicholas It's Richard Yeah it's Nicholas Nicholas Yingling They call him Nickel Dickle We're gonna figure this out It's William

I have a I have a Quebin Quebin Quebin Quebin For you Oh I'm out

Later Not listening anymore I'm wrong Actually Actually it's wrong. Hello? Hey, what's your middle name? William.

Boom. Weird middle name. It's a great name. Strong, bro. Everyone's talking about how you switched. Strong name, bro. You did switch. That's great, man.

You don't play anything with me anymore. You fucking switched, bro. Shut the fuck up Aiden Yeah tell him He also switched there too No he never switched Yingling why are you hanging out with Hassan so much now What?

With who? With Hassan With Hassan and X and Valkyrie Alright bye Yo Yingling Yingling Yingling The gun didn't make it to Connor Yeah I didn't send it Because they needed like permits to go

Oh I thought you sent the gun No I thought I told you That I couldn't send it This will come up in your review Thank you you switched My bad it's a gun He switched I'm with it now

He's saying my bad it's a gun It's really funny What are you doing now bro He has a weapon I know but now he's eating like a clementine I did bring a bunch of snacks But I quit eating them You switched

No I didn't You did So when I get really stressed I don't eat and my girlfriend had been hounding me about eating so i brought an orange okay that's my compromise oh i see yeah but wait but don't you look fucking snatched though when i don't eat yeah yeah when you don't eat funny when you don't eat when you don't eat You don't eat, but you eat When you don't eat and you get skinny Yeah, you do look hotter

And that's terrible It's so terrible Shouldn't she be grateful for that? I don't look better now Shouldn't she be grateful that you look fucking snatched And you ate and left zero crumbs What's Queben? Your cock actually gets bigger when you don't eat

And everyone knows this Wait, can I interject The other night I'm laying down in bed It's like It's like 1.30 or 2am Very quiet Pitch dark

Zipper 2 is next to me Not saying a word I assume she's asleep Aiden Door open Yelling about something I don't know He likes to have his door open

At 1.30 I do too It was late I'm a door open guy You got his door open He's just talking We're the same He's just talking. We're the same. He's just talking.

He's just so loud. Yeah. And she goes, this is insane. She breaks the silence and goes, he's insane. That's so cute. And I started laughing. What was this about? I don't fucking know.

You're just loud when you talk. And there was one night, like a few weeks ago, I went over to Aiden and I was like, hey, I'm going to close your door. And he's like, I closed his door. I guess I should have been more direct because he keeps it open all the fucking time well look i'll level with you there's a zero percent chance that door has been open past 1am whoa we have conflicting information conflicting information i mean let's look at the tapes i have two people on my side okay so it just simply can't be true

because i've been in bed before one, and I don't get in bed until the door is closed. Whoa. If they heard me, it's... What were you just talking about last night? Wait. I don't know what night that was. You don't get in bed until the door is closed?

He doesn't touch the bed until the door is closed, bro. Like, I would never get in bed. Because they're spooky monsters. Yeah, no, this happened. I have nothing to add. This just happened. Who do we believe? No, all I'm saying is

you very well may have heard me, but the door was probably closed. Look, all I know is that I lived with all three of you. No. And you all, after 1 a.m., would hoot and holler. So I can believe any one of you

to be the culprit. How do we know it wasn't slime in Aiden's room? That's true. How do you know it wasn't you in Aiden's room? I do sometimes hang out in there. That's true. That's true. I just show up. That's true. I do sometimes hang out in there. That's true.

That's true. I just show up. That's true. Last night, my mother ordered me groceries. How sweet of her. She's never done that before. She also ordered me to the room to give her a pork sandwich.

Hey, shout out to Factor for sponsoring this episode. It's the holiday season. Which means it's the perfect time to plan ahead to Factor. Yo. The sponsor of this episode. It's the holiday season. Which means it's the perfect time to plan ahead with Factor, a ready-to-eat meal delivery service. Did your mom really buy you groceries? Yeah. Why? You're fucking 26.

I didn't ask her to. Jesus Christ. Why did you fuck my mom? My mom brings me groceries unasked for. My brawless mother. My brawless mother brings me a factor meal. Factor meals are ready to eat and eat in just two minutes. They got 34 meal choices per week.

Ludwig, who eats a lot of factor meals, actually, can vouch. I've been eating factor meals. Is it because you can just heat them up? Is that part of the convenience? It's because the macros are easy to track, and I have a fit body unlike you three. So when I want 40 milligrams of protein or 40 grams of protein in my meal. Listen to me, I'm snatched. And also the three bean vegan chili.

You found that word out last week. I didn't find it out. You've been saying it a weird amount today. I've been saying it because that's what I am. You'll stay snatched even if you eat four of the creamy Parmesan chickens in one day. It's actually true. It's a little bit high in cholesterol if you ate four of them, but you would stay snatched. I know, you're thinking three beans and vegan

chili, is that the yard? No, it's one of the meals. Who's the vegan part? It's him. Oh, that makes sense. Why would you sleep with my mom? Here's the facts. Head to gofactor.zero No, Jesus Christ. The link they gave us is insane.

Yeah, are you guys ready? Get your keyboards out. Get your keyboards out. Type racer this, right? The fastest commenter gets a prize. In a lawyer's notepad. Go.factor75.com slash theyard60. And the numbers are written out long ways.

And you can type upside down. It's like when you write a check. It's a hyphen between And then slash You go to that website, use code theyard60 You get 60% off your first box Just google factor and type the code theyard60 The link's on screen, the link's in the description Just whatever

And also mentioning box Aiden's mom will bring Stop hanging out with my fucking mom Let's get back to the episode she'll bring it to you so I've heard you hooting I hoot

you got you got when you guys all get in a discord call together yeah bro come through I don't go in discord anymore you go crazy

I don't game anymore so you switched I switched you did switch dang I quit gaming you didn't switch what do you mean you quit gaming

I'm done gaming what do you mean you've quit gaming you haven did switch. What do you mean you quit gaming? I'm done gaming. What do you mean you've quit gaming? You haven't played a single game in the past week. No. He's really been. Chess game. No, I haven't played chess. Not one chess game.

How do you feel about the fact that you've switched? I feel great. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm going to bed early. Did you play main stage? I played friendly main stage. But that doesn't really count. He's back.

Wait, you entered? He's back. No, no, no. I played friendlies for an hour. He's back. He's back. He's once again has come back to gaming. He didn't really count he's back wait you entered? he's back no no no I played friendlies for an hour he's back he's back he's once again

has come back to gaming he didn't switch I didn't switch I win both worlds so wait so you want to have switched? no I don't

I haven't switched because you're saying I haven't switched but you want to but you're like yeah if I did switch it's the thing

I said I was doing so you either you disagreed why have you switched? I don't know I just haven't played any video games in like 3 months why? 3 months?

it's been a while I haven't played Valorant why? I haven't played Melee I solo queued Valorant last night I saw that you soloed it? this is how I know I'm fucking I'm a degen right now is I log into Valorant last night I saw that You soloed it? Yeah I'm trying to get to Diamond This is how I know I'm fucking

I'm a degen right now Is I log into Valorant every day still For one skin Just hoping it pops up in my store Oh to show up That is fucked And I don't play Which one?

Uh it's the It's the one that makes the fucking like skull Like the robot skull pop up You don't even know what it's called I don't know what it's called I just know what it looks like that's fair I don't know the names but I popped in last night and I saw you playing a little solo queue

and I was like wow at the end of a stressful day Ludwin you know what you're a piece of shit it's because you remember when we played that game against Stans and we clutched on his dumb ass and then you called me after on my phone. And you said, you know what my dream is? And I was like, what?

And you said, to get to Diamond. And I assume that meant with me. He has not hit me up to play since then. Oh, shit. I forgot the phone's one way. I'll fix that. Fucking idiot. What the fuck do you want from me?

I don't want to waste your two ways. Dipshit. Why did you hit me up? You were on the internet. Pussy boy. What do I have a pussy boy for? I thought you keep an open line was yours, Busy. Dipshit. Why did you hit me up? You were on the internet. Pussy boy. What do I have a pussy boy for? I thought you keep an open line of communication, pussy boy. What the fuck are you-

Big coat, fucking red with all the blood from all the deaths you've been dropping. Right here. It's a fucking dumbass coat you got on. Dumbass coat, bro. This is what it's like. Tom Brady looking ass. It's like a magnet. It's like a magnet for hate.

Tom Brady doesn't- Zipper, can you pull up the image? Just look up Tom Brady big coat. Can you explain why you switched? I haven't switched. I've always solo queued. I want to get to Diamond. Why don't you play with me? I'll switch out for the honest reason

and I'll keep it a buck with you. Keep it real. I feel like he's going to hurt my feelings. No, no, no. You're just not good enough at the game. Stop laughing. hurt my feelings no no no you're just not good enough at the game i don't want you guys gonna force marshall around too and push no i'm kidding i'm kidding hey don't swing oh i fucking swung uh the reason is because sometimes when i play and i play very infrequently like i'm not playing every night i'm playing like maybe one night a week it's usually me popping a gummy playing Valorant and I don't want to give you that Ludwig yeah I don't believe that I believe I don't believe him you know why you think I'm lying about popping or you know I'm lying about popping I believe I believe that

shit I think this is classic but you just didn't bump into him that day well no I've reached out to Stans before damn straight it's crazy damn straight you say that you say that makes us better well let me correct myself no you're right

you reached out to Stans let me correct myself you have not switched I popped gummy but i'll give stans gummy why don't i deserve gummy because you don't like drug loving you don't like the drug loving it's great i love drug wig the drug wig is really cute i don't know you can also flip though. You'll switch. You switch. You switch. I have not switched. Yeah, you switch. Can I wear the jacket now? You want to wear the jacket?

I want to wear the jacket. Yeah, you get some shit The only person who hasn't switched deserves the jacket. Hey, I don't, I wouldn't put this on. We're bulls. How am I switched,

you piece of shit? We're bulls. We see red. Wait, did I say you switch? I'm saying you can switch. What does that mean? This has a cartoon in it. It does have a cartoon.

Yeah, that's why it's cool because there's a cartoon on the jacket. You could, I don't know, one day I could be drug-wagging and be like, I can't fucking play with you, Ludwig. You're a fucking shitty-ass killjoy. No, I wouldn't do that. You could get mad. No, I would.

You'd get mad, bro. I think I would appreciate you playing with me so much. I definitely am nicer to my friends on the video game. You also get mad when you're losing, though. He has to respect you because you're platinum two. What rank are you? Platinum one. I did lose a lot of rank

last night lost all 3 games we had a 12-1 that we lost you know what it is a good jacket or 11-1

11-1 that you lost yeah it was 11-1 and then we lost a round and then something our chamber did upset the reina

and the reina stopped playing for 9 consecutive rounds and then tried to turn it on and then we still lost Well, I found their twitch page and they're fucking shit at streaming. Yeah That's so funny A little bra Pick up court is like you guys fucking Valorant I'm just better at the thing that because they had tt yeah it's like lebron showing up to pick up soccer and being like you guys are dog shit at basketball yeah it's kind of like that it's hard to find an analogy i respect that pettiness i think that i

hate that we've made him lebron i mean i didn't reach out i didn't like reach out and like put them on a poster and was like hey dumb bitch you bitch. Dude, you kind of are the LeBron-ist streaming. No, I mean, maybe. Sure, yeah, let's go with this. Let's follow that history. You're the Tim Duncan-ist streaming. You think Speed's the LeBron. You're the Tim Duncan-ist streaming.

I remember you saying that. You always think Speed's the LeBron. A year ago, he was the LeBron. No, Speed's going to be the Derrick Rose of streaming. Oh, wow. That's what's going to happen. That's hard. Give it two more years, he's going to be the Derrick Rose.

No, he's fine. He'll get older. He'll get older. You know what's going to happen. That's hard. He's going to be the Darren Rose. No, he's fine. He'll get older. He'll get older. You know what, guys? I've turned 18. I've realized that barking up a woman's ass is a little wrong. And it's like reflection, you know?

It's like hard figuring that one out. Yeah. He had 250K viewers live today watching the World Cup. That's crazy. And he obviously can't turn the camera around. Yeah. He only pointed at himself. Wait, can he not do it from the stands you could do that right no i doubt it live i doubt it you're broadcasting the world cup yeah but you're not i want to go do you think it would be fine for

like a camera crew to book out 20 seats and then have like professional cameras and like film it where would the money be in that though for a professional camera crew to do that i don't know you have to be speed for that to be worth it uh sure but it's still not allowed yeah uh there's a thing that they say before the nfl games any rights or reuse of the broadcast i don't know exactly what it is but do we get the picture of Tom Brady with the big jacket? Can I see Big Coat Brady? Zipper freaks out too much.

He'll be like, oh, I found it, but I don't know if I'll throw it up right now. It's the grenade. Zipper has shell shock. Yeah. And it's just buzzing in his ears. How do you feel that you're idle? Yeah. Dude, is that real? No, that's a Photoshop.

That's a fucking Photoshop. The first one is real, and then they edit it to be bigger and bigger and bigger. That's really funny. It's like a warming jacket that they put on for December games. Yeah, also, it's like he has shoulder pads and shit, right? It makes sense. It's way more than the shoulder pads. It's like, yeah, also like the jacket on top to be.

How do you feel about your man? The goat? Falling off. He didn't fall off. He fell off. Tom Brady fell off. No, he didn't. He fell off big. How'd he fall off? top to be. How do you feel about your man? The goat? Falling off. He didn't fall off. He fell off. Tom Brady fell off. No, he didn't. He fell off big.

How'd he fall off? Explain to me, you fucking idiot, how he fell off. You're having a bad season. He's having a bad season? Yeah. What's a bad season? Oh, if he makes playoffs, is it still a bad season? It's worse than all of his other seasons.

That's also not true. What's the worst season then? I would say the worst season he's ever had? Yeah. When he tore his ACL. Okay, well, that's a cop out. Bad season then? I would say the worst season he's ever had when he tore his ACL. Okay. Well, that's cop out. Bad season.

Cop out, though. Bad season. You were weirdly prepared for this. Tom Brady is 6-6. I didn't think he would be this equipped, actually. Let's go back to my other question. No, no, no. The Tampa Bay Buccaneers are 6-6.

It's an even record. They just beat the Saints in a 13-point comeback last quarter. All right? Second time he's done that in his career, by the way. When do you have time to watch football? When I fucking see Tom Brady on the screen clutching shit up. Anyway, they're about to make playoffs because they're in the worst division. So it doesn't matter if they're bad in regular season.

Tom Brady in playoffs, different animal, different beast, different animal. Oh, he comes alive. Do you think it's cool that he left his wife's ambitions to the dirt? Tell me more about how you love speed streams. What about it? Was it the Konichiwa? Who is more problematic? That's a great question. His pronunciation was just so good. For loving Donald Trump and hating

his wife. You wear one MAGA hat and all of a sudden you want to make America great again. What if he was wearing it in protest? Wait, did Tom Brady wear a MAGA hat? Yeah, he had one in his locker room. He hung out with Donald Trump all the time before the election. It could be like the Chinese protests where they're saying they like zero COVID in retaliation

to not liking it. So you're telling me you guys don't want America to be great? So Speed, I think Speed and Tom Brady, it's a race to the bottom. I think between the two is so different. Why? How? How even? Really? I could jump in, but it's feel like it's pretty on the nose here.

Once three times older than the other. So what? I feel like that covers a lot of the differences. I feel like I'm just saying one is a kid who gives kisses and one kisses kids. Boom. Mm hmm. Which one's actually true? Yeah. Those bars.

He's back. I switched. Yep. That was bars. Yep. He's back. Mm-hmm. I ain't switched. He switched. I switched. New Yard, same me. Yeah, switch, bro. Relax.

You say you switched? Yeah. I feel like, can I ask you a question, Ludwig? Because we're two strong boys now. What? Don't call me a strong boy. Why? Because, again, it's like, why are you a strong boy? Like, it me a strong boy. Why? Because again, it's like,

why are you a strong boy? Like, it's bringing me down. What are you talking about? What are you saying? Me and him are strong boys. It's like if I wanted to make an essay, us two melee players. You know?

Are you not? Well. Can you not L cancel? You can see what's wrong with the statement though. What's wrong with it? Just shouldn't be joined together like that. Why? No, so what's your question? My Queben. queben queben is that what if what what happens is you get running this

problem my shirts are getting too tight do i need to move up a size you buy small you buy mediums you've had too tight shirts for like no this has been your thing forever i'm gonna choke him i'm gonna choke him what are you getting harassed for small shirts and you're talking about how he's like you guys make two big shirts he's like no i want only the perfect shirt i've been realizing that my mediums are no longer stand up stand up jack it off stand up do it give me a twirl give me a twirl isn't she lovely it's too too small right yeah but i didn't feel like it when Stand up, stand up. When I bought it, it wasn't. This is a new shirt. Put your hands up.

Yep. Give me a 360. Put your hands up. I mean, know what you're capable of. Up, up. Oh, there's some Tom. Put it down again. There's a bit of Tom coming out.

Yeah, I think you could. I mean, the thing is you have like weirdly large pecs. Yeah. So I think you need a shirt that's maybe a little more form fitting, like a little wider on top, maybe drapes down a bit. This is cringe. My body's changing in front of me. It's like puberty too.

You could buy something that you like. Buy a yard medium. That'd fit you great. No, the yard mediums will not fit you. It will look like a dress on your body. Wear less t-shirts. I don't like, I like t-shirts. T-shirts are weird and they hug your body weird.

Go up a size. They look weird. I might, i'm just saying i did you run into this problem when you became big as someone with the same problem i'm sorry are you thinking that the reason the shirt doesn't fit is because you've gained a mass amount of muscle recently yeah and you're you're trying to ask me as someone who you think is strong. Like, I'm trying to relate to you. All right, well, I'm going to tell you my experience. I had to change shirt sizes because I got fatter. Okay. And the fat-

Oh, I guess you guys are different. Also increases strength. Yeah. But it was the weight that was the problem. Okay. What are you talking about? Okay. You're not getting it yet?

I know. Okay. I was skinnier. I was was thinner uh-huh now i'm get that heavier i'm fatter don't understand you lost me i'm i'm a heavy are you not snatched i'm working out but i'm also heavier show me your body from muscle i want to see your body now what do you mean you want to see i want to see your body you want to see it this is before and after you're great you look great oh does he do it it like hurtful the way you guys it was like it was like a sad guy's face okay it's not it's like when you hold a

water balloon by the time you didn't even see me you were you saw my back yeah you're back you see it from the back. Your back looks normal. All right. Appreciate that. All I'm saying is I'm running into this problem and I don't know if it's because I've been gaining muscle just at pounds and pounds. Uh-huh.

Yeah. Or what's the other option? You have always worn tight shirts. But they've never felt this tight. What's the other option? You were close. Gain muscle or. So what I'm saying is I don't want to look like H hugs 86 for the rest of my life so i need to

fucking get some baby looks great no what i'm saying is he always he always was really tight yeah but the tight shirts look good on him but he looks good he's got the little b fit the tiny shirt and some tiny pants you don't look like hugs okay you know edp 445 right that's who i look like i'm just gonna say i feel like that's not you're not black but the rest of it well we're all the money baby we haven't seen this 23 and me let's not hold out bro why is it the hurtful podcast now haven't we learned anything bro you got the red jacket i'm really cold i was actually you guys are so nice to me when i weren't you're asking for the i got in and out yeah because, because I wanted it back because I'm cold.

You look nice, man. You, yeah, get big. Don't touch my tattoo part. That's it. You guys see my tattoo? See my ink? I haven't seen it. I want to see it.

It looks good. Can you pull up the picture, zipper? Zebar. Show me right there, man. Zebar. Well, no, because then I don't have to put this shit back on. Get infected. It's good.

Good for you. You've done that. I went through it. I don't want to do it. It's good to get it infected. It's good. It's not good to get it infected. It heals better.

It's like cast iron. You've done that. I went through it. I don't want to do it. It's good to get it infected. It's good. It's not good to get it infected. It heals better. It's like cast iron. You switched. You can't just say it at any comment. Zip, zip, it's on my Twitter. What are you doing? Why are you on your phone now? What the fuck is this? He's messaging Connor, dog.

This is so fucked up. I would never. There it is. It looks great, actually. Look at that. Coots kind of looks like mewtwo and that's cool is this uh yeah i'm gonna do this yeah that's tight this brand new i keep throwing brandon i keep throwing brandon meme work meme work yeah yeah i'm like because i also threw him atriox

tattoo and he couldn't do it uh and i threw him this one and i got one coming for him soon i can't believe it was that fucking big i'm not gonna lie i walked into brandon's studio yeah i didn't i should have seen when you earlier today when you were like i can record the pod at four when i knew your appointment was at two what i was like i should have saw that and replied and said something because i just didn't think about it at all yeah because my head is new his appointment was actually originally noon and it changed to uh but i was like oh that's not gonna be two hours that's gonna take longer and i'm expecting a tattoo the size of my other tattoo that i got when i hit a thousand subs it's about like two nickels worth and i was like yeah i'm thinking right here right here because he's like where

do you want it and he's like that won't fit it well it changed because i called you and you were like oh yeah maybe we should do the thigh and like make it look good i'm like yeah that means bigger i didn't know that and so the first stencil he brought out was like like like your andre 3000 and i was like chill i was like make it smaller and he's like he's like this is the smallest i can go and he brought like option two is the twitch logo black the twitch logo is generally purple but there's black iterations of it. Okay. Yeah. No, I'm asking you what's on your skin, you idiot. Oh, yeah. I thought he saw it. I thought he knew from the colors.

I couldn't tell from the picture. I forgot you were colorblind. We're black? Is it purple? It's black, purple, colorblind. What does it appear as if you're colorblind black? You don't see black. You only see light.

You don't see shadows. Like Kingdom Hearts. Yeah. Oh, man. He's a nobody. Does character not even like i know i've it's like a part of the video game put it with you uh yeah so it's way bigger than i thought and it hurt it hurt i've learned that ludwig is just bad at getting tattoos he doesn't like the feeling it's terror it's like literally being always suffering needle it's being settled the needle and then they go over the same part where they said you the needle again that part sucks and they keep

doing it that part's bad because you're like oh they're done great and they then they put five needles on it yeah and then he's and then he's also fucking around the whole time i'm like almost done he's like yeah just about done and we're like 10 minutes in and i'm like okay well we're not actually done why would you ask that well i wanted information on how much longer is left because i'm suffering and i can't put words together well. Yeah. He does the thing where he works out and he only makes it 45 minutes. So he looks at the clock.

He's already done. But you can't do that with a tattoo. Can't. So you're looking over and over. It's still going. I wish. I wish we could. I almost was like, hey, let's break it up into two sessions.

Really? I thought about it, bro. Halfway through before he colored it in. You weren't hurting that bad. It's just. You're a little baby. Tattoo artists make fun of you for that. I'm not a baby, bro. They'll make fun of you. That's why I didn't outlined it. You weren't hurting that bad. It's just, you're a little baby bear. Tattoo artists make fun of you for that. I'm a baby, bro.

They'll make fun of you? That's why I didn't say it. You stopped halfway through? I won't make fun of you, man. You're a little baby bear. That's why I'm not making fun of you. He says he wants your body, though.

Brandon? He wants my body? He wants the ink of your body. What's he want to put on him? He wants to put some, I don't know, whatever you want to be put on. I don't know what to do.

Hey, vote on your phones in the chat what aiden should get as a tattoo and we will get how about your shingles they should get shingles they're better than that no they're not no they're not better than that i think they've grown up a portrait of slime portrait of slime my my whole face on your back steve-o style how much don't do this do you have a number how much to do that yeah yeah what's the number this is dangerous to tell you because it's what's the number and it's binding

come on you got it everyone a full portrait like how big is this? We're talking... Can you look up the Steve-O picture? Have you not seen the tattoo? Look up the Steve-O. Steve-O is a tattoo of Steve-O. It's not too big. It's not too big. It's not bad. You...

You're... It's what they call a mid-sized tattoo. Please show it. A mid-sized tattoo. Yeah. It's like a... You can get, like, full back tattoo, which is, like, the sleeve for the back, or a mid-sized. Or, like, a tramp stamp.

That's, like, the three levels. The three levels of tattooing i do like the idea of zipper three hitting it from behind and seeing my face yeah wow she does zipper god damn it there it is except it's me yeah it's slime and he's doing double thumbs up how much what's your price that guy was also like and i also need the batman symbol honestly i think probably like two 250 240 250 000 and you would get that on your back blood yeah that's not that much that's kind of worth it. I thought he was going to say a million. I don't think he would do it. I thought he was going to say two million.

I think he'd back out. He for sure backs out. He for sure backs out. You wouldn't do it. This is a fake price. I wouldn't do that. For a quarter mil? Yeah.

Yeah, because you'd gamble it all the next day. Wait, is it him? Is it him or is it me? No, no, it's him. Dude, we got a fucking message from Chad who's like, I'm coming to America. You guys want to go to Vegas? And I responded like, you know, a normal guy. I'm like, America you guys can go to Vegas and I responded like you know a normal guy I'm like yeah sounds fun and then Anthony replies down the gamble a hundred

thousand dollars with you and I'm like what did Chad call you I'm like do we make this like the same amount anything for views by the way a hundred thousand dollars yeah because I didn't switch you have a true blue legend that's what he told me before he leaked my balls online so maybe you said the same to you he said um he said i'm flying in uh vegas whenever he's flying in i said my goat absolutely he said how much each i said i can rip 50k maybe 100 depending on year end said you're fucking crazy but god i'm in it's like sexting he messaged me the other day and he was like, can you send me the yard logo? And I was like, yeah, sure. And I sent him.

He's like, all right, thanks. And then he's like, I'm going to get my tattoo. And I was like, oh, wow, he's actually doing it. Yeah. And then he texts me again. He goes, they rejected me. Wow. And I'm like, what? Like, what do you mean they rejected you?

He's like, I asked for them to tattoo my balls. Dude. He wanted to say sorry to you by tattooing his balls that is so and they and they turned him away that's not based why is it not based you're insane to say that go that is he might be the guy it's like so loving it's incredibly based it's not based it's not he's just a gentleman it is ball for ball that is true it's actually kind of funny i don't know if it base is the right word. It feels like he could contact you. I think base is more appropriate than

funny. You know what's crazy? He called ahead of time and said I want to tattoo my balls and they said yes. And then they saw him and said no. What horrors did they see? Well, he showed his balls probably. He texted me and he said, am I beautiful? Tell me I'm pretty, please.

He sent a picture of himself. I said, you're beautiful, Chad. They didn't have enough razors for the balls. The forest they'd have to go through. Those tattoos are fucked up because you gotta like, like if you tattoo your eyelids, you gotta like put a spoon underneath it. Yeah. To like.

I didn't know that. Yeah. So it doesn't like penetrate your eye. Oh, because it's so loose. You know what I mean? Like loose skin like that. And it moved a lot. It's like really. Oh my God. I'm imagining my balls getting tatted. Yeah. Well like penetrate your eye. Oh, because it's so loose. You know what I mean? Like loose skin like that. And it moved a lot. It's like really.

Oh my God. I'm imagining my balls getting tatted. Yeah. Well, just your skin. You can move your balls around. Zipper, can you look at ball tattoos?

Dude, look up the dragon tattoo. It's a dragon. Some guy tattooed his wiener and it looks like a dragon and the balls are like. Yeah, some people when they do their body suit,

they do the whole, they do everything. What's a body suit? It's when you get tattooed from here all the way down to your ankles. So everything. That's pretty hard. It's hard as fuck. Do they do like a tie?

Like a fake tie? It's not like a suit. It's not like a suit. I was like, that's funny. That would be really funny. Like a t-shirt? Like a t-shirt? Like a t-shirt?

Tuxedo? Yeah. You get a flower. Yeah. An anchorage. Corsage. What do you mean I can't enter this establishment, sir? I'm wearing clothing.

Oh, there it is. Wow. Isn't that cool? Dude, I saw this like 15 years ago. Dude, that is so pierced. Yeah. That is so. Ah!

The pierced thing. I can't do it. That's so good. Ah, dude. Dude, the picture had his email on it. Yeah. It was an AOL email. Can we have ladies?

Ladies. Yeah. I'm on AOL and. Didn't we have ladies? Yeah. I'm on AOL and AILS. Dude, that picture is really fucking funny. Dude, so many of the wrong girls would want to fuck you. No. I think it's adventurous. Imagine, is that something you think you should have to disclose?

Hey, my dick is like a dragon. Like an STD. Like an STD. So, I actually have a dragon dick. Fellas, you don't have to disclose it. They'll find out. It's not an STD Like an STD Yeah So I actually have It's not an STD A dragon dick Fellas You don't have to disclose it They'll find out It's not an STD here

No that's the whole idea Of disclosing Ludwig They They don't want to find out after Yeah They're like Are you wearing After

Is that underwear What are you I imagine the moment You get naked You're like That's a dragon No after being When they see it

Oh yeah Yeah Oh man Yeah you disclosed the dragon dick for sure. That's so fucking funny. But the reactions would be great

if you just kept showing people your dragon dick. If I got that and I showed you guys, oh, it's a good video. That'd be insane. I'd be like,

I can never make for this guy ever again. I'd be the coolest kid. Would QT break up with you? Uh, yeah. Like 3,000 times over. If I tattooed my dick like a dragon. Did I tattoo my dick like a dragon? Why?

What's wrong with a dragon? I don't think she would. Doesn't she love you? Yeah, she probably wouldn't. She loves you too much. But I don't think she'd be very happy with it. What if you got a little Taylor Swift portrait? I don't think she'd be happy with that either.

Why? Could you imagine Taylor like right here? Your penis, Taylor's version. Dude. This is a good direction. We should keep going with this. You think this is a good idea? We should make this a good direction? Where you think we're on a good path here?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Alright, I'm gonna wire you 240k tomorrow and let's see how zipper three feels. And get, yeah dude. I don't like this. Would you rather do your own face? No, I was thinking about that. I think that's worse. I'll do Aiden's face.

I think my own face is worse. I'll get his face on me for not that much money. Well, you were about to get my face for way less money. I mean, this has happened, right? People got the dreamless man tattoo. It's true. Aiden's on some skin. Now I won't do it because I'm late. Because you're on someone's body and you're so mad about having a small

picture of slime on yours. It looks like you're wearing a bikini. It's a full, it's my whole back. Do you see it? Uh, yeah, it does. You're wearing a Canadian bikini. You look like a cute little Canadian my whole back. Do you see it? Uh, yeah it does. You wear a Canadian bikini. You look like a cute little Canadian supermodel. You saw some little Canadian minks. That's right. What?

I do think you know, not that I'm planning on this scenario, but it would be really funny if I got you tattooed on my back like that and then somebody came on it. Yeah. You're depraved.

I heard zipper through the wall. I think you're right for thinking that it's all correct. You're not right. You get him doing the soy jack face and then someone nuts on him. Is he the number one point? Oh, never mind. I'm dropping my price and it's a you two soy jacking at something in the distance i like that

no it's us on your thighs and we're soy jacking your penis yeah oh my god oh and then there's one above the penis that's pointing below yeah no you get okay it's one of us and we're leaning like that like it's the tower of pisa I'm doing it's right here and you put your penis up there's an outline for where the penis should go right every time I'm dropping by this just pay for the tattoo this way that's good we need it's about time is all I'm saying you need to get some ink you need to get some ink on you What no got no ammo shooting dry this you're embarrassing you're embarrassing breath love it Do you do this? I believe in you dude. We don't even like you anymore

This is like bringing my son to Little League game. He threw up Shorty, please. Sometimes. Shorty. Shut the fuck up. If you need silence to put this one out. Dude, stop. You are pathetic.

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you buy stuff, and then it drops down and it automatically applies coupons to the moon. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. I ordered one of those that it was easy you just go you just go on your browser you buy stuff and then it drops down and it automatically applies coupons to the moon yes sir i ordered one of those japanese blowjob machines what are those oh like a tanga i feel i feel like i explained it perfectly i use a third-party branding. Bro, his name's Aiden. So, it was easy. Look, you use PayPal Honey.

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I know, I know. Viagra? Viagra pod? I wanna do the Viagra pod. You don't wanna have nasty big ol' boners? F***ing gross-ass dirty boners? The Viagra sweatpants pod is a great idea. Cause we'd all just be like trying not to look at each other's boners.

Just do a nude photo shoot at that point. Dude, we're completely naked and Viagra-ed up. We just cast hard. You keep putting it back in. This is good. Wait, wait, wait. 3,000 Patreons. We all get, we take Viagra, we get naked, we just fucking look at each other's cocks. Do we have sex?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we don't record it. Yeah, there'd be an asshole. I think we should do this because we, our boners would be be... They're just censored the whole time. It's so funny, bro. You switch, bro. You're gay, though. I've always been down. You are switched. This is the least switched he's ever been.

That was in the house. Dude, I saw... We were recording advice this past week. Anthony thought it would be really funny to start the episode. We're recording in his bedroom and he thinks it'd be funny to record at the beginning

in his bathroom, which is in his bedroom. So he takes the mic and like walks into the bathroom. Door like partially closed behind him to like block it off, right? But the angle that I have

because he hasn't closed the door all the way we start recording i'm looking through the crack in the door like where the hinges are and i see anthony's flaccid circumcised penis water into the toilet yeah and i was like i don't think i've ever seen another person's dick. You've never seen a pissing man. You've never broke contacts? You've just kept staring? What? No, I didn't keep staring.

He was like, dude, I just saw your dick. This is what happened. I was sitting on his bed like this. And then I sat up. And then sitting up brings me into the eyeline of the crowd. I feel like you stayed sat up. And I was like, uh. And then I leaned back.

And I was like, Anthony, I just saw your flaccid penis with, with, I'm holding the mic into the toilet bowl. So you have the mic in your hand? Yeah. Because I wanted, I thought it'd be funny to start the show with the sound of my pee hitting the water. That is good advice. I think this is like a situation many of us run into when you go to a public bathroom

and then you peep into one of the stalls and you see through the cracks that somebody's in it. And you make eye contact. And you make eye contact or you see them naked and they're like this and they got bush like Brillo with cock sticking out. Right. And they're fucking in their peckers there. And you avert immediately.

But that's why I was concerned because I thought he was just looking through the cracks staring at you. I tell you guys something really embarrassing that happened to me I'm at the airport and I go to the bathroom and I have to pee so bad and there's so there's like six stalls and it's like stalls one through four are

closed and locked and then stall five the door is like open at like almost entirely open but closed enough to where it's blocking off the toilet and then uh stall six is locked so install five i'm kind of like oh it might be one of the you know when you go to public restroom it's like the poop toilet you go and it's like oh fuck someone didn't flush it's all gross and whatever you don't know that's why no one's using this one i see it

now so i go and the door is like almost entirely open but i just open it and there's a child oh there's a child sitting on the toilet who just didn't close the door and he's like six and i'm like ah i just closed the door i don't even go to the bathroom i just leave i just leave i was like oh my god i just walked it on a kid in the restroom have you ever done that in a public restroom where you walked in on a kid no don't have you where you walk in and a kid is at the urinal but his pants are pulled out yeah that's classic yeah that's classic i uh well i when i'm in pooping in a public restroom i always try to make it fun for everyone i'll just like yeah i'll just make sound no no i don't believe you you think you you mean with your butt

or with your mouth both but with my mouth the butt is you don't get to choose that the butt is circumstantial that's just gonna happen but the mouth

so you're making like groany sounds yeah I'll be like woo are you doing that for other people that have fun or are you maybe a little insecure about pooping in a bathroom

I'm not I'm literally not insecure it's kind of like being in a scary situation and then talking to yourself or like singing so that it's less scary. Or like doing the mango chant.

Yeah. I'll just be like, woo. There's no way you do this. I don't believe it. I don't believe it. I don't believe you. Dude, that's so annoying. Because like this isn't that crazy and I do this.

This is insane. It's not that crazy. That's why I don't believe it. It's so believable that you think you could get away with a lie. I'll be like, I'll be like, I'll like make a sound with my butt and I'll go yes, sir Give me a couple other lines a third button on the on the I'll just go yeah Italian place for for Dawson's birthday Wait, but if I'm there it's different. Wait, but if I'm there, it's different. No, no. You weren't even there.

That's when I went to the bathroom. The Italian play for... Oh, yeah. We weren't... I was not in the bathroom with you. You know what I'm saying? I said yee-haw in there

and I shouldn't have. It's a specific example. It is a weirdly specific example. You brought up the restaurant too. I should have said something more Italian. Yeah, well, like, what would you say now?

You're in there. Marron. Is that brown? No, I don't know. I'm not sure what that one brown no I don't know I'm not sure what that one is my daddy used to say it that means idiot he called me that

are these slurs no they're just Italian words sure but I mean most of them they're all most of them are slurs I was in the airport

like three weeks ago and I went in the bathroom and someone just had their socks on the ground like in the corner they took off their socks and put them in the corner. I was like, a soldier was here.

Someone fought the good fight lost. I do like at LAX or airports in general. Like you take off your backpack, you put it on the wall, take off your jacket. You put the phone on the fucking toilet paper holder. It's like you're going into space. Yeah.

You know what I mean? You're like, we're going to do this. It's a whole thing. It's comfy. There's like a flight. I think it's two are from Australia. And it was just long. And I was sweating gross.

And all I wanted was a shower. And I couldn't get one. And so I gave myself like a shower inside one of the bathrooms. Oh, like the sink shower? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I had also taken a messy poo-poo. And so I just, there's no bidets. So I just used my underwear as my last rag.

I chucked it. I chucked it. At least you threw it away. Of course I did. Of course I did. You're brave for telling us that. Why not just use the toilet paper? Because.

I'm sure there's a reason. There's a really good reason. I'm going to think about it in a moment I did a What do you call the sponge I did a sponge bath in the glass block stream Cause they didn't give me a shower But I just went to the bathroom

And I took the hand towels Like a I washed my whole I was naked in the bathroom With just the burn things And I would just fold them into squares And then I would put water Put soap, rub it and then get everywhere

And then I'd get another one for water And then I'd get one to dry And I was butt ass naked Washing myself like this And then I had to use my shirt there As a rag to dry myself Because this is how I shower Is there not like paper towels in the bathroom? And then I had to use my shirt there as a rag to dry myself Because this is how I shower is there not like paper towels the bathroom not enough to like if you wet your hair

Okay So why did you do all that cuz I was dirty I was like in the room for just so fucking stick it out because the other people were in the box with me You can stay see us the Roddy Ricch song What they stick in the box? No, it's like that that's what it's about yingling in the box it's about lovely being a skillet in first grade a kid peed on me how'd that what what happened we like were you in the bathroom yeah okay we had a we had a bathroom in our classroom yeah it's a fair play wouldn't. Because, I don't know, the kid would lock himself in and kill himself or something. I don't know. They didn't lock.

It's called playing. It was a post 9-11 world, please mind you. I'm so overwhelmed by the terrorist attacks. And so I was peeing in there. And then a kid walked in and he was like, he had like, he was behind a few years. He was in there early and he walked in just like pretty much drawers on the floor and then just started peeing off a rip. And you were just at the toilet.

I was just sitting on the toilet. He's peeing on your sitting body. Yeah. That is just so funny. And then I get up and I move, but he got a little pee on me. Yeah. Did he like spray all over your little leg oh he said move freshman you know what's crazy never saw him again after that maybe it wasn't real what's up maybe he was like a phantom pisser no it was real it was real i don't maybe maybe that was just like a figment was he blue and

made of antimatter he was like not a fig a thing with my doctor Manhattan. Just pissing. Do you see the story of that kid? Who's seven? He was like seven in 2011. This is an older story, but he had a memory of being in the towers during nine 11 before he was born. Yeah. Wow.

Yeah. And it's, he's like talking about how he has a different life and how he was, he was in the towers and he was on the plane or some shit during 9-11. That's so cringe. He would recant his tales and his parents would be like, and we're just supporting him. That's stolen valor. Well, they know they can get like money from it, right?

You go on Maury. I don't know. And Maury's like, that's crazy. Dude, I should go on. I read the comments. I had a dinosaur. Dude, I know. I read the comments and the comments a dinosaur. Dude, no, I read the comments. The comments are like, they're like, I used to work in like an 18th century town.

This is on TikTok. And the kid's like, no, I actually did this. You're wrong. It's like your old life. And like, it was a TikTok trend. And people were just explaining that like me and my boyfriend, like we were from the 17th century. Oh, it is.

Yeah. Yeah. That's just people who hate their lives. This is the blight of being a lib. Cause if you're a Republican, you have to have like people like Nick Fuentes on your side who are just devout Nazis. Yeah. But if you're a lib, you have someone who astral projected into nine 11 on your side

and that you just got to roll with them. It's kind of cringe, you know, all the way around the merry-go-round. Yeah. But different, I would rather the-11 livers than the nazis that's better than racism also speaking of the liberals i was at trader joe's getting fucking snacks that is a liberal haven my tummy hurt and i got all snacks i didn't eat all day and they have gingerbread people what and that's what i saw it and i was like oh i get it it's like gender neutral gingerbread man but i was like if i was if i was like, Oh, I get it. It's like gender neutral, gingerbread man.

But I was like, if I was, if I was like a Republican, I would be mad at this. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. I see the red jacket today. That's not an accident.

Dude, if you're Crowder, that's four YouTube videos. Yeah. Dead ass. You're like me. When I see Alan statement. Yeah.

But for licking your lips, Tucker Carlson, I didn't even know they're called gingerbread men. Gingerbread men? Dude, they're called Italians. I've just never, I don't know what that is. Yeah, you're French. Like a gingerbread man.

That snack. What do you mean you don't know what it is? Oh, it's like the cookie cutouts. Yeah, what the fuck is the matter with you? What the fuck are you talking about? You're the one piping up? He's like, wait, the house is where they live? And it's also made of cookie?

I didn't know these things. It's because your mom would serve you, like, sliced beef heart for Christmas. And tell you about how it's more than they got in the war rations 50 years ago. Spanish tradition is you eat grapes. Drink your cow blood. Drink your cow blood. Drink your cow blood. Drink it all, okay? Your sister drank it, so she didn't go to play. You eat grapes.

That's the thing. What? Grapes. Oh. When the Germans were marching on Paris, so we did not get any food. How old do you think she is? She was talking a hell of shit on you when I went back. Really?

Yes, sir. What'd she say? Yes, sir. Slime she say? Yes, sir. Slime. So arrogant. No. Shit, man. I don't make the rules.

I wish I called you arrogant. Damn, bro. Did she say I was arrogant? She said multiple times. She can say whatever she wants because I have not been very nice. And that's just the truth. She was pepping up. She was chirping.

I feel like she wasn't chirping. Ugly, too. Her words, not mine. She called me ugly. Your mom called me ugly. Is the shirt a bit tight? No. You have sensei's boobies.

Is the song as muscles? It should not be so. I'm French and I think no. She's vibing. She's chirping. What about Peter Whole weekend Is he cool

Peter What's that guy's name again Slime Yeah I like slime This is funny Cause no one else Gets this impression Yeah that was

Like he's doing This Peter impression That like And no one's met Peter This is Ludwig's impression Of his black father Black stepdad My black father

Is just my stepfather Your black stepfather We don't denote like that well you you especially denote like i don't know do you think all right listen i gotta you you put me in a road trip with your mom and peter uh-huh do you think i will kill himself first do you think i win them over um what do you mean i I win them over. You get through the ride. Yeah. And we come up. She still calls you arrogant at the end of it.

Elegant? Elegant. How do you do that? He's arrogant. He's a con ass. What? What is that? He's a con ass. How do you say bald in French?

A con ass? Fils de pute. No. No, you don't. No, you don't. No, you don't. Beat. Beat? Beat.

Beat. You're fucking... That's what we call you in English, too. Yeah. Come on, man. Also means dick. I hate this coat, bro. Oh.

Gotcha. Gotcha. Oh, it's so French he's in chat. I'm getting cold. You're getting cold? You're getting burr? Chilly? You're like, hey, got a jacket right in there, man.

Woo. Now I want a drinky. Um. I should have got stuff. We got time, bro. We got time. We got ten minutes left on this, bitch. You don't know what time it is. We got a big, dirty weekend coming up. You nervous? Dude. Are you anxious?

Yeah, I'm fucking nervous. Why are you nervous? Why are you nervous? Because you haven't been working? Because you switched? Is it because you started wearing The new more absorbent diapers And you can't tell If you've wet yourself? Yeah

What are you nervous about? What do you think is going to go wrong? Yeah pampers What's up? Pampy I'm just worried What are you worried about? Why are you being an asshole?

I'm worried about the tickets I'm worried about The fucking fighters Show showing up on time. You guys want to sell some more tickets right now? Disguised Toast? You don't even check your Discord in this event four days away. Disguised Toast is busy watching anime. Just think about that.

Oh, he's really being the imposter. You're right. He's going to be on upload. Yeah. Are you worried? No. Yeah, he's worried. It should be fine.

I think my worry is that I don't achieve my loftier goals that I've set. You know, I looked at my goals for the start of this year and it was get 500,000 concurrent viewers. Whoa. What a lofty goal I set. Yeah. Dream would need to reveal more than his face. Yeah, he'd be a Dream dick and ball review. Dream would need to reveal his dragon dick tattoo. Circumcised or uncircumcised, Dream is a spread pick.

Yeah. Yeah, then I think I get halfway still, you know? So I've set some lofty goals for myself and I think that's what will be hard to achieve, but I think the show will go well. And you invited Stans? What? Yeah, he polls, bro.

He polls. Stans is looking fierce, but I wouldn't talk shit on Stans anymore, guys. He doesn't have a one-two. He thinks he's God's gift to boxing, which I like that confidence. He has, you know what he's weirdly confident in? He's so confident in getting punched in getting punched yeah he like enjoys getting

punched he's got a jaw on him yeah he's interesting thing to be confident about iron jaw that's big he's like i don't care if i get punched i don't care if i lose i'm like what the that's so weird and i was so depressed i'm gonna have a gun in my i was telling him how one of the matchups uh because boy boy got a concussion dude i saw that he got owned you pulled that clip zipper the matchups uh because boy boy got a concussion dude i saw that he got owned you pulled that clip zipper i did a thing punching boy boy i think it's on twitter i think boy boy yeah yeah so so boy boy was supposed to fight myth and then had to drop because he got a concussion because he sparred if i did a thing and i did a thing fucking

clonked him and uh and stands like i'll fight them both. Like, what? What the fuck? He's so genuine. He's like, yeah, I will fight Myth and I will fight Box Box same day. What the fuck? That's crazy. Are you kidding me? You can't do that. That's not legal. You think he said that because he knew no one would let him? And he could get away with it?

No, he seemed genuine. He seemed hungry. What has gotten Jinky? He seemed hungry. What has gotten into him? This is so intense. Here's the punch. Dude, this is crazy.

Oh. Oh. Oh my god, bro. Even with the headgear, bro. That was a spar-ending punch. The headgear actually doesn't reduce concussions at all. So it goes for the fist bump, though. Headgear is purely if you don't want to get cut on your face or like abrasions

on your face, but it doesn't prevent concussions. Are you sure? Yeah. Then why do they make amateur boxers wear them with their weight classes? Oh, well you're doing a boxing event, maybe you should. I'm not doing an amateur one. Oh, it just exactly is an amateur one. It's bigly.

It's huge. It's a bigly huge one. You should have got the Paul brothers to fight. That would have been hype. That's like You should have just done that. A viewer idea. You should have

Andrew Tate play slime and do Baldoth. Right. And they both win. Nick Comentate Emperil is Emperil Leslie Tool.

Yeah. Next time we'll get the Logan brothers. The Logan Paul brothers. I think it's so good at fighting. Nick Comente Emperiless Emperilessly Tooled Yeah Next time we'll get The Logan Brothers The Logan Paul Brothers How'd they get so good At fighting Cause they have nothing To do

They have a lot to do It's the We talked about this Like a hundred times It's the Rob From Oh Sunny thing What Rob

Oh yeah They're rich enough They're rich enough To get a good trainer And dump a lot of time Into it And Like Jake Paul Is only fighting people That he can Feasibly beat They're rich enough to get a good trainer and dump a lot of time into it. Jake Paul is only fighting people that he can

feasibly beat. I think he's a good fighter now. I think his stepping stones were like a Pokemon gym leader badge where he started with fucking Misty's dumb ass. Jake Paul just punches Misty's fucking head. He's obviously trained enough to

handle the average person in the ring and even the above average person, right? I think he could fight a real boxer and win. That is, but he hasn't done that, right? He needs to prove that. He's never fought an active,

actual pro boxer. He's fought, he's fought, Ben, wasn't he like a retired boxer? He's only fought people who are retired MMA fighters I think Who don't box You should fight Beach from Street Beefs

Yes another day at the beach Or Baby Hulk Yo Jay Paul versus Baby Hulk Would rip his head off Baby Hulk if your agent Is listening Hey we'll make it happen you play chess You got four days.

Dude, I'm obsessed with Paddy the Baddie. Oh, yeah? That guy's cool. He's funny. He's like, yeah, I look like Homer Simpson. What an accent. It was very posh. It was not scouse. He is so fucking funny.

Yeah. You see the clip of the dog shite? Huh? He was walking his dog and then he like rang this ring doorbell on this it's like this ring doorbell camera footage and uh and and then like this one picks up and she's like hello and he's like oh i'm so sorry i was walking my dog and he took a big shite in your lawn and i just can't pick it up it's so liquid he's talking about how it's like a liquid shit that the dog dropped. And he's like, this is Patty the Batty.

Yeah. Yeah. He's like, and then, and then she, she recognizes him based off his voice in, in like this like grainy image. He's like,

Patty the Batty. Oh my God. And he's like, that's right, love. Yeah. Sorry. It's just me dog.

She just took a big shite in the lawn. I feel so bad. And she's like, nah, it's all right. I'll be home in five minutes. You're good. He's like,

I just feel bad. And then that's how the interaction goes.'s so awesome so sweet that is sweet he should feed his dog more fiber yeah that's what i was concerned about i wanted to get more powerful the dog or his dog the dog i want to imagine you could train your dogs to be strong enough to fight you were talking about what mike vick did for several years no no no no to fight your dog yourself so we have these we have these postcards we have these postcards that we're just wrapping out we were we uh used to write personal messages on these postcards uh to our tier three patriots and you write so many of them that you forget what you put on them i think and uh people post them in our discord and somebody dropped one of my postcards that i you put on them i think and uh people post them in our

discord and somebody dropped one of my postcards that i wrote and i just i don't know why it just said isn't it crazy how michael vick used to dog fight aiden he's crazy yeah so you're not talking about dog you're against dog fighting right i want to on the record dog fighting yes i but i am i guess my dog's fighting i you know what i mean i am pro fighting your own dog after it has become a weight class that makes it fair dog gets to a certain weight class you should have to defeat it in combat yeah to earn respect so like are you throwing punches are you wrestling the dog, I mean. It's street rules. Yeah, it's like, what do you. The dog's not gonna bite you?

The dog. Okay, that'd be unfair. The dog isn't very good at following rules. The dog can't. The dog's gotta use its fist. Basically, it's like two animals enter. This is basically Soul Calibur. It's Soul Calibur. It's Lizard Man.

You just want to fight a dog. I don't want to fight a dog. I don't want to, but I know one day I'll have to. You should be able to. In Biden's America, you aren't allowed to train your dog and get it fat and big to fight it with your own fists and hands. I'm not allowed to give my dog a little bit of creatine in its food every week so it gets really big and strong so I can fight it. I'm not allowed to do that. I'm not allowed to do that because Biden's skeleton up on there.

Because what? The oldest guy alive? The Guinness World Record book holder? The oldest guy alive? Since the gingerbread people say I can't do that. So you were upset about it. I was a little. Yeah, you're

fucking dumb. Then you switched. Look at us, man. We didn't switch, man. We're the same old boys hey it might be a new set but it's the same old four of us and even

even though Aiden slowly slowly is seeping and sinking into a dark just do something for once just do anything

do a dance I need to go pee so bad do your job wait not yet not yet we're about to close it you're being a fucking asshole hey we're closing

we're closing sit down you're being a fucking asshole closing time you're an asshole I like you're an asshole fucking asshole. Hey, we're closing. We're closing. Sit down. You're being a fucking asshole. You're an asshole. He's an asshole. It's just me? Why just me? He hates you.

You look like shit in that dumb coat. I'll take a look from when I messaged Connor. We're gonna go. We're gonna wrap. Hey, everyone. Thanks for watching the first episode of season two. I hope you like

our new home. It was expensive. And if you listened this late, then please come watch my chess boxing event live for free. Hey, the yard will be there. And the yard will be there. You can even come. We're selling tickets day of for half off. Come to the yard VIP booth.

The Yard VIP booth is called Nick's Mouth. Yeah. So you can come in that. VIP in Nick's Mouth. You won't. But really, do come, please. Or watch it online on my YouTube channel. All right.

All right. Hey, thanks, bye. We'll be on. Wait, I mean, and then whatever we'll talk about on the bonus, which is literally getting naked and getting boners. And then linking them all at the human centipede, but the gay version. We're going to touch their tips together and like with their swords. He's got a piece so bad.

He's got a piece so bad. And we're going to go into battle like they're swords. We're going to put them all the tips pointed at each other. We're going to drop an orange and see if we can slice it. I'm trying. It's going to be all quiet on my front. Hey, okay. Bye.

Bye.