The Zac Clark Show - He Stole $50K for Heroin – Now He’s a VP at a leading Recovery Company | Blake Porter

Episode Date: February 17, 2026

Seven years ago, Zac Clark walked into a treatment center to speak at a Tuesday night meeting – and met a guy in pajama pants wearing a “Grateful Dead” tee who had no idea if he was going to make it.That guy was Blake Porter.In this episode, Zac and Jay sit down with Blake – now Vice President of Business Development at Release Recovery – to trace the full arc: growing up in a small town in upstate New York, the fear and insecurity that shadowed his talent, the slow slide from booze and cocaine into opioids and heroin, and the moment his dad found a needle and the truth finally had nowhere to hide.Blake opens up about what early sobriety actually looked like: structure, accountability, humility, and the near-relapse that still scares him to remember – five months sober, back home, texting a dealer from a hotel bathroom… right up until something intervened and he chose honesty instead.Topics include:The AA meeting in treatment that changed everythingSmall-town upbringing, big fear, and the need to escapeAddiction, grief, and the cost of avoiding painThe truth-telling moment with Blake’s dadWhy Release Recovery felt like “home”A near-relapse story that shows how real the obsession can beBuilding a life (and career) rooted in serviceIf you’re trying to get sober right now, Blake’s message is simple – and it might save your life: be honest.

All right, welcome back to the Zach Clark Show. Today's guest, if you know release recovery, you know this guy. If you don't know release recovery, you should absolutely get to know this guy because his story and what he does in the world is extremely powerful. He's one of my better friends on this planet, and it's a long time coming to have him here. He is currently the vice president of business development for release recovery. He is a man who truly walks a walk, and I'm excited to have this conversation with him. Blake Porter, welcome to the show. Thank you so much.

Thank you. I'm having a little experience sitting here with Blake. It's going to be a good one. I love, okay, so like I promise Blake a little icebreaker here because he's super nervous and anxious, but he's going to get rolling here. What are you listening to these days? I love your tasting music. Believe it or not, jazz.

Oh. Bill Evans Trio, shout out. That's what you're listening to. Yeah. Is there words on these songs or is it just straight up? Just straight jazz. Piano, that's all I can tell. Yeah.

A couple bass, a little strumming. What does your musical interest say about your current spiritual condition? Is that a good thing or a bad thing? My therapist recommended this guy, Bill Evans, and I took direction, so I think that's a good thing. Nice. Are you listening like when you're getting ready or when you're commuting, or where do you feel it?

Yeah, at all times. It's like a vibe setter, but it's also like I've listened to it while running, which I don't recommend, but I've tried it in all different areas, but mainly just like at home chilling. At some point I will expose my room. running playlist, which has extreme range and I'm not sure I'm ready for it yet. I want to hear it. I mean, right now there's Elton John and probably rage against the machine all in the same.

You know, it's just this. That's you. Yeah, Elton John. That is so you. Miley Cyrus, the climb. Like, that shit gets me amped every time. I don't care what you say. Dude, I respect that.

Anyway. That's range. Yeah. Serious range. We won't make that into a Patriots joke. No, let's not. Are you nervous, Blake? I mean, I wasn't until he said that I, that I was.

But I think, I mean, my joke was going to be like it wasn't that far of a commute to be here. So when you thank me to be here, like, I work here. You didn't have a choice. Anyway, so you're seven, you're sober? Seven, eight. Seven. Nine eleven? No.

September 11th, 2018. Yeah, beautiful. So let's cut to the chase here for just everyone who doesn't know you. Blake and I met when he was in detox. I was there on a speaking engagement. So you are, we'll call it 14 days sober. I walk into your treatment center, into the room to speak, and what is your mind saying?

Yeah, I was there for, yeah, I think 14 days, 15 days. And yeah, it was a night meeting. Like usually we would go out to, you know, to walk to a different location. but we had this really small group of guys, and you came in to speak to us, and I, yeah, I was sitting there. I was literally in pajama pants.

I was in a Grateful Dead t-shirt, as you do remember that. And I was just like, whatever, like I was showing up for the meeting, and you walked in, and you just had that, you know, that cool, like you looked awesome. You know, you just looked like this cool guy

that, like, livened up whatever, you know, the whole situation, because it was a small, weird group of, it was just like a, you know, like a bad setting. And you walked in and as soon as you started telling your story, like you, I remember you were like wearing like, you know, black shirt, jeans, like you look cool. And I was like, and then he started talking and I like literally thought you were Matthew McConaughey because I had been using drugs and alcohol for about 17 years prior to that, you know, moment of Can we just let me be Matthew McConaughey for a second?

You don't have to preface it with the drugs and alcohol. Yeah, dude. I mean, yeah, I mean, I think it is important to know what state I was in, but you did look like Matthew McCona. I'll take it, no matter what state you're in. Yeah, I'll take it. That's crazy. I mean, yeah.

So if you're listening and you've never been on the campus of a treatment center, I do a monthly speaking engagement at the treatment center that I went to, Karen Treatment Centers. And I walked in to where Blake was residing. And it's depressing. I mean, like, part of my job is to bring some energy because it's 6.30 on a Tuesday night. And everyone's miserable. To Blake's point, he's still wearing pajamas and a really, really bad, grateful dead shirt, which is, which is, we'll forgive him because he looks wonderful today.

But what was that experience? So I come in and I speak after you're thinking that I'm Matthew. Mikanahey. Yeah. That, yeah, and I honestly remember that night. Like, I'll never forget it. And your story was my story. I remember, like, you just, like, every single piece of it from the baseball to the, you know, being married, to the heroin, to the, you know, the way you were brought up, like your family.

Like, I was just literally, like, I felt like I was listening to my story. And looking at, like, looking at the way, like, the way you looked to, like, that was part of it. of it like this guy looks awesome healthy cool I was like I want that you know it was like that exact experience that like you know that I that I hear about in a that's like I want what that that person has was this your first time in treatment yeah oh it was yeah did you know anything about A A I went to I went to A in 2016 when I was getting a divorce so I went to like two or three meetings and Rochester, New York, and was there to get off painkillers and thought I was able to drink.

So, like, I didn't have a, I wasn't really bought into AA, but I've been to a few meetings. And you're 26? At the time that I was at treatment. No, I was 29. 29. Yeah. Can you just, let's backtrack a little bit. So you grew up in a place called Adams, New York, right?

Adams, New York. And can you, can you paint the picture a little bit about, like, what you were, what you were like as a kid growing up? yeah yeah i mean adams new york it's like a it's a super small town in upstate new york uh north of syracuse like well just really you know hardworking people blue collar people um like i loved that i had a great experience growing up like i had it was in it was a great town very you know tight-knit community but um yeah i mean like my like my family was a you know it was a like my dad uh worked like three hours away. He wasn't, wasn't around while we were, you know, while I was growing up or my sister. Your parents are divorced. Yeah. What age were you when that happened? I was like 11 or 12 when that

happened. Okay. Do you remember that? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I talk about it a lot, though. Like, my dad really wasn't around, you know, for like six years prior to that happening. So like it wasn't like this big, like, monumental, oh, it's ripping the family up. It was like already Because of work? Yeah. Yeah. I love your parents. I mean, Bruce and Lord.

I mean, we love them. They, we'll get into it because I ultimately become Blake's case manager when he moves into release recovery and he's some of my best work if we want to feed my God complex. So you, parents get divorced, you're 11, you're 12 years old. Like, do you remember your first drink? Do you remember the first time that you got high? No, not it not like specifically like when I start like really reflecting like I was I remember being in a canoe and I was like five years old or something and my like I got to sip like a Budweiser from it was like the coolest setting thinking about it but like I remember taking a sip of a Budweiser at like four or five years old and like not hating it you know and what always interests me about your story Blake as someone who's gotten to know you I feel like you're the type of person that is very, very talented, right?

Like I'm watching you lean into the microphone, like this guy can sing, he can play sports, he's, he's kind of like God at all, like you've got the goods. And there's something about you where you will get to these moments in your life where you are kind of at the pinnacle or about to have a breakthrough

and then digress. Is there, do you remember, like being an athlete growing up, some of the, what might fuel that? Yeah, that's a deal. deep-ass question and you know me very well so it's like you definitely you know from my intake notes coming from from treatment up until the last seven years like that is yeah that's like I can I can you know I was like a baseball player I played basketball like I just there's always like a certain amount of fear you know and like insecurity and I think like that always I think got

my way of just like in general like I didn't know that then but like just being like paralyzed with fear of just like, you know, definitely being talented, but it was like scary to work at it, you know, or like scary to give your all or like let go to see what happens if you really, really tried. Yeah, I always compare Blake to Allen. If you give me McConaughey, I'll give you Alan Iverson, which to me is a very high, high grade compliment, one of the best to ever do it. But truly, you are, everyone has one of you and their friend group, which is the guy that's literally good at everything. You give him a basketball, he's going to make the shot. You give him a baseball, he's going to strike you out.

you know, which is, which is part of why, you know, I love you, you know, and do you, so do you think that fear, that insecurity is because of the responsibility that comes with being great? Or do you think it just, you weren't interested in working that hard? Yeah, I mean, I think it was, yeah, I mean, it's hard to like, you know, dish off a bunch of a or like take my appropriate amount of like responsibility for for those actions I think you know I didn't know that I was an alcoholic you know I didn't know alcohol alcoholism was so I think there's a level of like just having that you know having that happen without like a real work ethic you know in the midst of you know discovering alcohol but also being you know having like a knack for certain sports and you know I don't know I don't

I don't know what, you know, what the exact, you know. But looking back now, like, as a kid who like Zach's describing being able to do a lot of good things, being, I'm assuming, like, able to, like, move around different friend groups, like seeming like a cool, adjusted dude. Like, what, what is the ism, you know, in the alcoholism for you when you were a kid? I mean, I have a theory. I mean, I have a theory. And the reason I'm asking these questions so direct is really,

in the conversations because I relate to your story a lot, just like you said, you related to mine. And I'm just curious. As someone who knows that they are decent at a variety of different things, when drugs and alcohol come into the picture, there's a certain level of control that you then have over how drunk and how high you get. And ultimately, you became probably a pretty good alcoholic and drug addict. I mean, you took that. There was the one thing where you were really able to push full throttle.

Yeah. Yeah, I think, honestly, now that I'm thinking about it, I think it's like, I think it 100%, I gave up everything, you know, a desire or motivation because I loved drugs and alcohol. You know, I think it, like, honestly, boils down to that. Because, yeah, like, when it came time to graduate, like, my guidance counselor was, like, two months before I was graduating. She's like, Blake, what are you doing after school? And I was like, what? I was like, what are you talking about?

Like, I didn't have an awareness that, like, there's things after, you know, and I, my baseball coach sat me down because I kept getting in trouble. And he's like, this is, like, life is bigger than, like, high school's going to end. You know, like, and I just never thought about that. You know, it's like, I never had a preparation for, like, what do you want to do with your life? You know, it was just like, I'm getting high and... Were you like the bad boy? Were you like, you kind of enjoying being a rebel, you know,

without a cause kind of thing? Yeah, super scared. Super scared. Yeah. It's like that ring... I think, I can't remember where we heard this in the rooms, but, you know, talking about that mental blank spot. Like that wrinkle on the quilt, you know, like,

where there's just a part of you that's just looking for a reason or excuse to check out. You know, because for me, really, it was just fear. And I wasn't aware of that. And I think it comes from the fact that I was so in my head all the time. And then like sports and drugs gave me that relief. Yeah. Yeah. So the, you experienced some death.

in your life that I still don't know if you processed it but there's a level of I think work that's been done there what was the first

kind of traumatic you lost two of your friends was that yeah yeah yeah it's yeah I've definitely done some work around this and like

you know reflected and you know know, like, since 11 or 12, like, I was an alcoholic. Like, I just drank alcoholically, like, no matter what was happening, you know, and like, that is a big part of the experience with tragedy. And, like, I lost really, you know, some really good friends and a lot of other people lost some really good friends and loved ones and sons. And I, in those experiences, drank more and did more cocaine and did more everything. because I didn't know how to handle it, whether it was a good day or a bad day.

So, like, I, you know, I just wasn't, you know, whatever. I wasn't equipped to handle what was happening on life's terms, and I, in turn, drank, like, you know what I just used that. And, like, that was not a way to process, you know, grief or, you know, tragedy or, like, showing up for my friends that were also going through that. Like, it was just like, oh, this happened to me, you know. And I think the biggest work I've done about that is like, you know, actually, and, you know, to really honor these best friends or these people that I loved and their families is to like, you know, be of service or like, you know, use that as a way to like tell their story instead of like, you know. Was it alcohol or drug related?

Yes. And I know, did you have the thought, well, shit, I should look at my drinking or using because this could happen to me. No. No. I mean, this town that I grew up in, like, and it's not like, you know, too much different than other towns, but like, there wasn't a lot of education around mental health or substance abuse or excess drinking or like, you know, so I don't think anybody really was like looking at that is the problem. I think it was like a, you know, bad luck, you know, that kind of a thing. But you're, I mean, you're a deep thinker and you are a spiritual man. How have those? experiences helped form who you are today. Because I think losing, I didn't experience death at a young age, but I can't imagine what that's like.

And you're being really hard on yourself. I mean, the fact that you felt like it was something that happened to you, I think is absolutely valid. It did happen to you. You know, these were two of the people that were closest to you in your life. And I think you struggle to, you know, give yourself some grace there. Yeah, I think that it goes in line with the sports question and like why I didn't, you know, you know, I think there was like a, I don't know if I would have heard somebody that was giving me guidance. I think I probably was receiving guidance along the way and like people, meaningful people in my life saying, you should maybe take a look at this or do it this way. And I just like, the rebel side of me was like, you know, like, I think I like, you know, I, I don't think it was like a, I don't think it was like a. I'm just reflecting on how I really think it's important to think about that I wasn't the only one that had that experience.

And I think more than others was like, well, no wonder I'm behaving this way, you know, because this just happened, you know. What do you end up doing after high school? So two months left to school. I said, where's my best friend Nick Felice going to school? I said this to my guidance counselor, Heidi Edgar. shout out all these amazing people. And she said he's playing basketball at Paul Smith's College, which is in the Adirondacks, Lake Placid, New York.

And I said, all right, let's try to get me in there. And I, like, got a scholarship for, like, business. And it's, like, a woodsman school. Steve DeAntonio loves this story. But it's like a woodsman, like, lineman, culinary, like, all things, wilderness college. And it's like this little private, you know, school. And I took business there. and went to Paul Smiths.

Did you graduate? No. I had a great first year. Great as in like I attended most of my classes, did a lot of drugs, enjoyed my time out there. But like I ended up, I went there for a year and then left to move to Ithaca, New York, to follow a girl. What were you, what were you, like, what was the day like?

Well, because my friend went to Hobart, which is an upstate, like near Ithaca. And I swear when I went and visited him, and this was in the throes of my drinking and using, I've never been around more weed in my life. Like I was smoked stupid, you know? And I just, and I was smoking and drinking, but like, you know, you're in the middle of nowhere. You're 18, 19. You don't care about school. What are you doing?

Yeah, it was old Milwaukee's beer. It was an insane amount of weed, but I was the one that was bringing the insane amount of weed. and then met people that also lived like me. Adderall was big. Cocaine was big, and then I discovered morphine out there, which was, that's what I really just fell in love with morphine. How did you, where? How did you?

Just a seeker, man. What's the secret, man? Seeker. I found it. I wanted it. So I, you know, I just met the right guy that had it. Yeah. Just find morphine.

Yeah, I found it. At Paul Smith. At Paul Smith's College, Woodman School. Look, there's something. about when I first met Blake and where I've landed with most folks that I know that have grown when they say they grew up upstate

there's Westchester County which is 45 minutes north of New York City and then there's fucking upstate which is our winners are fucking cold we are going to get through them however we're going to get through them and we're pretty tough we're pretty resilient

most of the people I've met from upstate New York are awesome. And you joke, you call yourself Farm Boy, but that's really what it is. You're in this rural area where winters are just beat the heck out of you, and I don't blame you for drinking

and drugging your way through that shit. Yeah, a lot of hardworking, hard drinking folks. And you've taken on that identity. I mean, you and I talk a lot about, I mean, our fathers, I think, instilled in us a certain level of work ethic, accountability,

kind of we all put our pants on the same way mentality and that's what I look for in employees and I think that's why you've had a lot of success with us quite frankly yeah yeah um yeah I think I talk about that a lot like I was raised like respecting other people looking people in the eye handshakes like you know I just had this like crippling drug addiction coupled with like really good people trying doing their best trying to raise me and it definitely shaped like a you know I yeah I like

I definitely am super proud of like the people from from where I grew up and the way that we were raised and like you know taking the good and trying to unlearning you know unlearn some of the you know the negative sides of that where do you want to go from here you want to go to treatment you want to get sober like what I mean I think

there's a lot of things that I can dig into what's coming up for me is you had this experience where I walk into your rehab and speak. You then launch on this journey of picking an aftercare program where you kind of went out and interviewed all the people, which is not normal for those out there. Typically people just get assigned to a program and say, okay, but Blake was taking his time.

Why did you end up picking release recovery? Yeah, I always like... Blake's an alumni of release recovery. of we're missing that in this conversation. So he basically went to care and treatment centers. I met him in detox. He heard me speak. He was then considering coming to be with us and ultimately.

Yeah. Yeah, I always think of myself as like that I was this willing, willing perfect patient, but I was like totally not. Like I was like, you know, again, scared. And like knew that my family was holding a boundary. I have to pick an aftercare program. And yeah, like meeting you. Like I remember in my like rehab journal I wrote like release recovery question mark, Westchester question mark.

And I was like, well, I got to go see this place. Like I met the guy, but like where am I going? And so I did the visit. I met everybody at release. Like I met like all like the pictures on the wall when I walked in was like it was like in my like the core of like the movies, like the music, like just the people. And I was like, this place in the house is incredible. And I was just like, yeah, this is great.

But I had it in the back of my mind, like, I'm not going here. Like I'm not going to like, that's like, it's too nice. Like I was like, you know, and I toured this other place. And as soon as I walked into that place, I was like, I'm going to go to release recovery. Just because like I just like the feeling I got there wherever it was, like, I just was like, I don't think I can, I'll survive if I go here. Like I didn't feel like I was going to like, and for whatever reason, reason my dad was like he was away and he basically was like whatever you decide to wherever you decide to go that's your choice but you're going somewhere and I just remember that like that place and I was just

like I'm going to release like I felt safe I had a feeling of home you know when I walked in there and you know I just knew that I was going to like live if I went there it was like this it was this crazy crazy experience I'm like I don't think I'll leave this place like because you almost died right I mean, like, that was where it was at the end of you're using. Yeah, fentanyl, you know, heroin addiction for like a year and a half. In a really bad, bad spot. Where are you at that time? Where was I living?

I was in Rochester, New York, in my dad's spare bedroom. Yeah. But just because I know that, like, we've talked about movies, we've talked about music. But, and I know you, I think you think this way, too. And I'm just curious, like you're in college, you're heading towards harder drugs, morphine, heroin. You leave for a girl, which is very cinematic of you. Like, is there a movie that you're, like, watching of yourself? Like, what's the movie of your life?

Like, what are you trying to, who are you trying to be, even if you're not aware of it? Like inactive addiction? It was just like you're like a fucking... He knows the answer to let me answer the question. You know the answer? I was like I was ever I was all the best you know I think it was Jack Nicholson I was Bob Dylan I was a mix of all these people but it was all bullshit you know it was like this react like this thing that I was telling myself that I was this tortured guy but I was stealing

money and not working hard and just doing drugs you're more Bob Dylan and Jack Nicholson today that you were then yeah that's a compliment yeah yeah I appreciate that yeah it was just like trying to escape whatever I was experienced like my reality I didn't want to be like I don't want to be anything like I didn't want to have like a label of like what I was and you were shooting dope or no one yeah once or twice like the first time I ever did it I shot it and then I got again I was like because I used alone a lot so like I was like I could probably die if I learned how to shoot it myself so I was like just yeah snorting and and opiates became your love at the end yes yes round the clock yeah and your dad why why yeah

It just, it was velvet. I felt like a velvet, you know. I just treated, like, I was one of those people that I gave me energy, but it also knocked me out too. So like, I, like, I remember, you know, the morphine, you know, like, when I, because I got like a bad DWI, I was a classic alcoholic and cocaine addict as well, but like, when I got in trouble, like, real trouble with drinking, I was like, opiates can, I can hide that a little bit better.

and I also loved it more. Yeah, it's a big warm hug of a... Yeah. Roxaset or an oxycodden or a bag of heroin. Yeah. Just the best hug you'll ever get. Just warmth. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, so good. See, I just... And that's what I love about it. Like, just being able to talk, like, joke about it. It's like... Yeah, that's what hooked me when you were sharing your story.

You're like, the way you used, I was like, this guy fucking loved heroin, just like I did. This is amazing. Well, there needs to be that identification. And it's what makes me uniquely qualified to have a 14-year career in behavioral health care. It makes you uniquely qualified to be where you are in your career. I mean, it's this shared experience and misery and all of it. Yeah, especially for a guy in detox that all I knew was the war.

Well, you went to a shitty detox up in Adams, and then your dad, you tried to leave, and your dad said, you're not going to what happened there yes it's a good it's so eventually my dad found a needle which like the first time i shot did heroin i shot it with this this girl and hid that needle in this like the trailer at my grandpa's house he says it's not a trailer but it totally is uh so it's a very nice one bedroom house it's a trailer i'll show you guys picks um so my dad was cleaning my room it was like a year and a half before like that needle was in there that room for a year for a year and a half. And he cleaned my, he was like, because the room was a mess. And like he discovered this needle. And I don't know where I was like so, I was like away somewhere. And he's like,

you need to come home right now. And like the next day, like I just started seeing a therapist. And he was like, I'm going to take you to your therapist appointment today. And I was like planning on going to therapy and then going to get heroin right after that. So he ruined my plan. And like we were parked out, like parked out in front of the therapist office. And he started like, it was very weird energy. I could feel something was wrong. And he's like, what's going on? And he's like, I called your grandpa and you stole money from him.

You stole money from your mom. He started like listing these things. He's like, I checked my bank account. There's $50,000 missing from my account. $5.00. 50, which is probably low, honestly. It was like a Venmo. scam I had going. And you're still banned from Benmo, right? Still banned from Venmo. I really want them

to give me another chance. What was the scam? I had like, and I made amends for this for most of the people. To Mr. Venmo? Like I had my dad's credit card hooked up to Venmo. I had my debit card. I don't know, should we teach people how to do this? But like I had my debit card hooked up to Venmo. I would, I had like 16, 17 people, great people, normal people that I would, like, oh shit, I just sent you $300. I meant to send it to somebody else. Can you send that back to me? So I'd send it on my dad's credit card.

And they'd be like, oh, yeah, no problem. They'd send it back. And then I would just transfer it to my debit card. $300 a day for six months. That was crazy. That was feeling your habit. Yeah, yeah, while having a few other revenue sources. It's really not that hard.

If we want to get high, we will get high. Yeah. It was in like, these were normal people that were just like, like, why do you keep? You know, eventually they're like, why do you keep doing this? I'm like, I can't figure this Venmo thing out. I knew what I was doing.

That's hilarious. And then my, eventually my drug dealer accepted my straight Venmo, so I could stop doing that. So, yeah, so he looked at his bank account for the first time, seems like. And then he had a needle in his hand. He's like, oh, he's like, and I was cleaning your room, and I found this.

So, like, he was lit, you know, all this evidence and then showed me the needle. And he's like, so what's going on? And it was like, I was, I remember being really dope. And, you know, I was sitting in a car with him looking at this therapist office, and I just, like, looked at him and I was like, I'm a heroin addict and a drug addict and an alcoholic. And I was like, and I have been for a long time. And he, like, he, like, paused and was like, well, you can't be on heroin. And I was just, like, we all, him and I smile, like, we laughed. Because, like, I started, I kind of laughed.

I'm like, oh, I am. And he's like, yeah, I guess that was kind of. kind of stupid and and we're like he's like well what do we do and I was like you know well if I can't do any more heroin and I kind of like looked at him to like see if I was you know if he was really really serious about that were you waiting for him to say you know you can I mean were you check I mean I was just check in the room yeah you know like you know like you know and I was like well if I can't do any more heroin right then I need to go to detox because I get really sick right when I don't have it and because like I knew that

much. Like, I wasn't using heroin, like, with a bunch of people. Like, I would buy it and then try to go be with my family, you know, like people that I love. Like, I didn't want to, like, you know, so I didn't, I wasn't like totally up on the lingo. I knew what doapsic meant. I knew that people need detox. Like, I wasn't educated on what was happening to me. So, like, I just knew, okay, I'm caught. I got to go to detox because I get sick, you know, and it was just an honesty session, you know. So we Googled this detox in Rochester. I had Fidelis insurance, went to this basically homeless shelter for a day, met this fellow named Dean, who said he could get China white heroin. I had $1,300 that my dad would send every month reoccurring, and I knew that

was about to hit. So, like, once Dean said he could get heroin, we came up with this, like, we left detox because you can just leave. I didn't know that either. His girlfriend picked us up. there was she had zero she had no gas in her car and none of us had any money it's like i had to get to this this ATM that was 20 you know 20 minutes away so we were just praying that we could make it i finally i like we made it just to this this this this deed or this like community bank i got the money out like it was like a all like a perfect combination but then i went on a i stayed there for a day at the detox went on a five-day run and then went to on september 11th. went to Karen. But yeah, so I did have one detox episode before.

You went to detox, left, got high on good heroin for five days, showed up with Karen, stayed at Karen for 28 days, you transferred to release recovery. And at the time, this is seven years ago, we were in our early days and I was your case manager because I was doing a lot of the duties and responsibilities of the house. And I felt, felt something very special about you early. I remember just having empathy for you and thinking to myself, I don't know if this kid knows what he is capable of. I don't know if he knows how special he is.

And you were in a relationship at the time, which I know was rattling you and it was with your ex-wife. you were back in a relationship with your ex-wife, who I'm assuming that you had hurt and she had left or whatever had happened during your addiction. And what can you tell me about those early days? What was helpful? Let's start to talk about some hope here because...

Yeah, I remember, yeah, so I, like, met you. I, you know, loved your story. And when I met the other people at release, like I felt this sense of, like, like I said, I felt home, you know, and I felt safe with these people. And then I just like, I think you took this so serious. Like you were like, and I felt safe in that.

You know, like you really, it wasn't a joke, you know, what we were all, me and the other guys that were there at the time. Like, we were, it was a life and death situation. And I think like with the way that the house was run and like that it was like a, like the van leaves at six o'clock. Like there's like these simple rules that, that. that were happening and like observe drug testing, like observe drug testing and like room searches.

And like I literally as a 29 year old that was like still, you know, it was 30 day sober and had like the mental obsession to use opiates still, like I knew I was in a serious place. And I think like I talk about that today still like this is a life or death situation and like if I walked into a place that you know like the staff was like messing around like not taking this serious. Like I know I would have found a way to like use that to my advantage. And like I just, I don't know, I just felt safe. Like I was like I'm I had a level of willingness,

but like that can leave. Like if you're like you, you know, if there's if you're not coupled with a place that's also taking it serious, like you can have a willing person and they can, you know, mess up. But like I just remember like you, you know, there's like a good mix like with everybody at the staff and the clients, a good mix of humor. And like, this is like life or death and like this is what you need to do in order to give yourself the best chance to live. So I think like the like necessity like it was that, you know, and like your schedule, you have you have anything to do in your life. You're going to go to a meeting this morning. Then you're going to go to the gym.

You're going to go see this therapist. And like people held you accountable to that. So like I was not like in coming from a treatment center that also modeled that like the severity and the seriousness of. this like it just was this like really perfect track of like people that are taking this you know life or death and uh i don't think i knew at that time that that's what i was up against but like there was like some kind of thing that i just was like all right i need to like get on the van at six o'clock or else like what else might have to do well i think i think what comes up for me there is is some of that goes back to your parenting you know you risk like as much as you

did what you wanted to do when it came time for your dad to hold that needle up to your face and say, what is this? You did not lie. You told the truth. And that is a respect thing. You weren't entitled. You know, you had some humility.

Some of the things that we talk about around here. And you're damn right to take this thing seriously. You're damn right, I do. Because I think that in a lot of ways, the behavioral health care field has started to get a little bit lazy, get a little bit laxed, shy away from the things that really work, which for a lot of people is structure, is accountability, is holding their hand at 29 years old and, you know, showing them the way.

Because that's just what someone did for me. You know, Jay, Jay was one of those people in my life. And so it's, I love, I love your description of release and I love your description of those early days because that's what we were trying to be. And that's what we still try to be today. Yeah. If you were, well, I mean, I agree with that a thousand percent. And I don't know if this is, if it's individual to the person, but at least for me, and I know for you, and it sounds like for you, too, like there was something in me that responded to discipline and purpose. And I had just sort of like

broken that into pieces. And so when I found like that light, it started to put me back together. And I, like, wanted that. Like, I wanted someone to tell me what to do. You know, someone who had been there and had gone to the other side, walked into that room with a light in his eyes and was bouncing around and alive, you know, because you were obviously, you know, walking dead. If you, if someone came to you right now, not in release, you know, not when you're working. And they're like, listen, my kid, he's 20 years old.

He is using drugs. I can't reach him. He needs to get sober. What is the path that you would say? he does this, this will work. Yeah, it's, it's exactly what I did. Like, I think I, the 20 year old part makes me sad. Obviously, you're like excited actually because like nine, for me,

it was nine years of like, at 16 years old, I knew that I was an alcoholic. I knew I had something wrong with me. So like, I think it's, you know, depending on the severity of the, the substances or as medical state, like treatment, structure, detox. into a community and structure that that will hold them accountable. You know, like, that's... Because, like, my...

Like, the reason I believe in release recovery and, like, what we do is because I, like, said, like, I don't think I would have survived if I didn't have, like, you know, that level of care because I was up against 17 years of, like, trauma and addiction, doing whatever the fuck I wanted to do with no account... Like, people were trying to stop me.

I was a conniving person. Like I was like, I'll get over on it. I'll do whatever. Like, I had a disease that like, you know, so like.

And by the way, some of those things carry into sobriety, you know, like I've, I've been guilty of those things. I'm sure you've got stories of, it's not, just because we get sober,

doesn't mean that we're all of a sudden, like the hustle is gone. And especially in early sobriety, those old behaviors come, come back in full, full-fledged. I want to hear the one story about the near relapse, and then I want to get into really what life looks like today

because there's some points that I think are going to be important for the listeners to hear. Yeah, absolutely. So I was at release, and I was like, I wasn't, like, I was a client that did what they were, you know, asked to do. Like, and I was taking this, you know, super serious. I had an intense sponsor that was like, you know, you were my case manager who didn't let me get away with,

anything, which is what exactly what I needed. And I had this sponsor that was holding me accountable in a totally, you know, similar way, but, you know, through, you know, step work. And like, he literally said, I'm going to do your thinking for the next 90 days. And I was like, fuck, yeah. Hell, yeah. Because I couldn't think. And I didn't, like, to your point, like, I needed somebody to tell me what to do. Um, so, like, I was doing all the things that release, programming, you know, meetings twice a day, going to the gym, you know, attending community dinner, phones down, being a part of a community. Like, I was literally doing all these things that was asked of me. And in 12 step, too. And like, it got to the point, I think I was four or five months

sober, and I was at the ninth step. And, you know, I told you this, told you this story the other day where I was like talking to my sponsor, I was like, oh, these guys at the house invited me to to go on a snowboard trip this weekend. He's like, you're going to upstate New York to make amends. Like you owe people money and you have like this is what you said when we started working. You go to any lengths. That's a part of the early sobriety now that I think we're missing. The entitlement is insane. You know, these these kids get sober and have three months sobriety and then mommy and daddy are buying them memberships to the club or the thing.

and it's just like, bro, have some humility. Yeah. Yeah. So this is the ninth step in a 12-step program. Yeah. So which is, you know, go out and you apologize. Make restitution for all the harm you've done. And, you know, a lot of mine was financial.

A lot of it was emotional. Just being a self-seeking dishonest person for 17 years, I had a lot of, you know, amends to make. And so I'm, and again, I'm doing all the right things. I'm committed to sobriety. Like I got everything I couldn't be more committed to this. And right as I'm about to go like take a train to upstate New York because I didn't have a car,

I received a text message. I was at the house up in the lodge at Released Recovery and I received a text message from my old drug dealer who's this girl. And it was like 13 other people on. It was like a group text message. It said, hey, guys, this is my new number. And I deleted all my old drug dealer. number. I deleted everyone's numbers, because that's what was asked to me at release, and I was held accountable to that. And so, like, I got her number. And I was like, oh, shit.

Like, and I didn't tell anybody. I didn't tell my sponsor. I didn't tell anybody at the house. I just had this thing in the back of my head. Like, now I have this girl's number, and I'm going back to upstate New York to make amends. Uh, so I didn't, again, didn't tell anybody, didn't bring it. I just, like, had this little thing. And I was, like, lined up to make all these amends. and I was doing it. Like, I was, like, in front of my cousin, you know, cousin like that I would, when I worked at this golf course out, she was, like, the accountant. She knew I was stealing all this money.

So, like, she was, like, one of my first people to make amends to. And in the back of my mind, I was like, I have this girl's number. I'm going to fucking text her tonight. Like, I'm going to make, like, I just was so torn and didn't know what to do. So my, and my dad was met me at home, like, because, like, it was like, I'm going home for the first time of four or five months. Like, maybe should have. have some people there. And so I was in a hotel with my dad. We were in this hotel room and I'm like sitting

in the bathroom like texting the girl. Like can you drop this? Can you bring me, you know, I had like $70 or something. I was like, can you bring me, you know, $70 worth of heroin? And she's like, and then she called me. She said, yeah, I can, but it's got to be right now. And I was like sitting in, it was like eight o'clock at night. My dad's in the next, you know, in the bedroom. And I'm sitting there in the bathroom and I guys hang up I'm like yeah just come and I like sit there for a second and I don't know what I didn't pray I don't know what happened I just like I called her back like the fear I was like never mind never mind and I just like you went to bed she was 10 10 minutes yeah I went got chicken tenders I think but it was crazy and then I like got back to release

and I like told everybody what happened I told Steve from and like he goes, did you pick up? And I was like, no. I was like, but it really felt like I did. And he's like, then you got a shot. You're okay. Unbelievable. And like I just started getting honest and, uh, told my sponsor. I told him what happened. Yeah. And then I like, I had even more respect for how serious this is because like I was all in. You know what I mean? With that mental obsession, it was crazy. Well, I think that's so important for people to hear that because that is the work working. Like, you know, you were building a foundation, you know, that, that you didn't, maybe you didn't even know, like whether it's a meeting, the handshake, the calling people, whatever it is, something was

working on you because we all get in those spots where it's like that mental blink spot, like that twist, you know, it's like you're ready to throw it all away in a fucking bathroom with some girl you haven't seen in years to get high for what, you know? But we know that obsession and then God comes through the work that you've been doing or your higher power, the universe, whatever the fuck you want to call it. I mean, that's incredible. I mean, Jay's three days sober at a wedding. It's you five months sober having the heroin dealer on their way.

What happens in those moments? I have to believe in the spiritual nature of this program in those moments. Yeah, because if I do that, I don't get a job at release recovery. You die. I die, and then I don't get a job at release recovery. But yeah, no, it's, yeah. So the job at release, you end up coming back and, you know, I don't want to see the rest

is history, but you continue to do the work. You graduate. You end up getting hired as really like a recovery coach, a recovery associate, which is, for those you listening, it's kind of your entry level introduction into the field, your working shifts, you're around

the clients and the patients kind of all day every day. You're trying to be a positive influence to them. You do that job for a while. You kind of move into the house. You're a houseman, manager. I think the thing that I want you to hear, Blake, is, you know, we started this conversation. We talked about basketball and baseball and music and even you're using

and how you were full of potential, you know, in all of those areas. I don't know that you realize this but I do think you have found the thing that you actually committed to which is your work and recovery and you've been doing it for seven years you haven't stopped every day without missing a without missing a day you work really hard at this thing and you are now in a really big position with a lot of responsibility and your life is set up to really be whatever you want to be. And I just need you to hear that because I think you're a guy that always feels like you are kind of just coming up short.

But I can say over the last seven years, you've outkicked the coverage, you've far exceeded anyone's expectation of, I think, what you, what they thought you might turn into. So what do you credit to the career you've built other than your sobriety? Do you still love the work? Like what's coming up for you in the whole? Yeah, I mean, just to touch on it, like you said, even in sobriety, some of these character defects can stick around. And some of the work that I've been doing lately is to your point, like, you know, coming up, like I'm accepting who I am. I'm seven years into like a lifelong journey.

So like I'm really doing a lot of work to like give myself some, some, you know, you know, just like that I'm a human being, you know, and like that this, I don't have to be perfect. And, you know, it's like I think a lot of that continued work with therapy and, you know, my own recovery program, like, like it's lining up with like learning about myself, which helps me then be more useful in this field. you know so like I just I just wanted you know to mention that and that and that I think you know like continued work on myself helps me be better at every area of my life but for me it's my job at release recovery as the vice president of business development and I did admissions you know after being you know recovery associate you know Blake was the first person

that I took our main line which is every call coming into release recovery. This was a huge moment in my career and I said, Blake, I'm giving you this phone. And I knew that probably meant there would be some subtraction before addition.

I knew that it meant that Blake was going to be under a microscope which not a lot of people can handle, which is my microscope. And you knocked it out of the park. You knocked it out of the park with admissions and yeah, now you're vice president

business development. Keep going. Yeah, he said your job is to be of service when he handed me that phone and that was the best way I, because that's, you know, what I was taught in all, you know, in recovery. So, um, I, I think release recovery is the best. So that makes my job really easy to get people excited about it and to like go out into the world and like wait to you meet our team. Wait to you see what like like obviously i had an incredible experience as a client and in my family had such an incredible experience and like i just believe in what we do you know and i think that is why like and i'm just i don't know like i i can get people excited to meet incredible people like i i love what i do like i take this serious as well like i have i have a lot of fun but i take like you know

each situation that that someone entrusts me with like a you know a loved one or you know, a crisis, like, yeah, okay, well, guess what? I've got, I have a solution for you and I have like incredible people that are going to take care of the, you know, the person that you love. And I don't know, I just, I've been really lucky to be, you know, you know, like, you taught me how to do this. You taught me how to like, you know, in those situations, you know, just like the way we handle each situation is how, like, you know, if the light bulb's out, change the light bulb, like in that degree of every you know it just translates to to every situation and um it's because the team is so good that i'm i can get people you know i can talk about it easily yeah no that makes

me so proud that makes me so proud and there's this thing that we talk about gary fisher who ran circlodge for many years tell us the story about early in his career when he he basically says you know I answered the phone, I talked about joy. You know, the joy. And I can say, without a shadow of doubt, those last couple years when I was using drugs and alcohol, there was no joy. You know, there was no joy.

And I can also say those first couple months sober, there wasn't a lot of joy. And so for me, when I got to the point, it sounds like you got to the point. I know Jay's been there where you start to feel the joy. you want to scream it from the mountain tops because this recovery thing is it's just the best and sometimes i i feel like i should stop talking about it because people are tired of hearing it but then i get to hear your story and the way that one meeting one interaction that we had in a detox program

seven years ago has gotten us to this moment where you're sitting here on this show with seven months sober, vice president of business development for a large behavioral health care company, helping a tremendous amount of people, living a personal life that, you know, you dreamed of. And I mean, you're living in New York. I mean, it's just crazy, dude. I'm so proud of you. So proud of you. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, it's, that's why I love about it is like there could be 99 people that I've heard your story before, but there's one person in that room that hasn't. So like, let's tell the story the best way, the truth, you know, and like that reaches, it's, it's incredible.

It's incredible. Do you, what's next for you? Hmm. More personal development. No, I just, yeah, I, this release recovery. I guess my question is really, Blake, like, you've seen a lot. now like you've been in this you've been in this field if you will for several years what makes you good at your job is it really just the human interaction or what do you think has helped you become

who you are in this field yeah I think I think I finally purpose you know I feel like I finally have a purpose and like I don't know I just I feel that I have a role in something, like I'm a part of something. And like obviously I take it so personal because like the amount of growth that's happened at release and being a part of it and just knowing the people intimately at release, like, I don't know. I just, I think, yeah, it's the, it's human connection. I think it's, I try to be authentic.

I try to be real. I try to like, you know, be vulnerable to a degree, but also have like a, like, like we talked about like take it serious like this is a serious thing this is not like a like you know even though I wear tie-dye and I like kind of a you know hippie mentality like hard work and like you know showing up and answering the phone and like working hard and like you know trying to get this message across or like be a resource to people like I love it I love doing this you know and like I've met a lot of incredible people and like I think it's important to like know what we can do at release and like what we can't do and like partner with like

people that that are doing really incredible work and like I just think about my parents like they like they got lucky like this therapist that I was outside that office you know with my dad showing me a needle like he said care and treatment centers is where you need to go like if that didn't happen like my dad and I googled this Medicaid like which which was fine like it was it was a great place but like like if you if you if you don't have people that are helping you find real connection or like really you know real places like that scares me you know that's why we want to be the first call you and i talk about that all the time there is so much garbage out there on the internet that if we have the opportunity if we are

fortunate enough to be a family's first call and they haven't been jaded by the google search that is such a gift to be able to hold their hand and give them recommendations and walk them through this process as someone who's been through it. There's nothing, there's nothing better than it, you know, and I know you and I still get fired up about, you know, when cases are in our care or working cases into our care. And it's because we've, we've seen the miracles of recovery. We've seen, like me, you're sitting in, you are a miracle of recovery of this process, of us hanging a shingle, you know, nine years ago with this program and now being where we are today, your blood sweat and tears is is all over this place, Blake.

I feel like we could probably like return for around two, three, four, five. There are so many questions that I want to ask. And we didn't get into, you know, some of the relationship stuff, which I know has had its ups and downs for you. I think you and I are both sensitive dudes that when we get the indication or inclination that we've hurt someone, it just really weighs on us, and I think we could probably talk about some of that stuff. Before we go, though, what is the one thing

you would tell to the guy who's trying to get sober today? Yeah, I mean, it comes down to honesty, you know? Like, I was lying for so long that, like, and I just didn't, I don't know. Like, I don't think I knew there was another way to do it, but like as soon as I got honest like because I think like my family knew I was you know struggled but like when my dad like you say like point blank said like what is going on with a needle in his hand like you know when I got honest then like it's just led to in you know to this life and like today I same thing like just be honest you know like there's like then there's like all of a

sudden there's people surrounding you with solution um But I was holding on to this thing for a long time. And as soon as I got honest, the world opened up. So beautiful, man. That's Blake Port. Do you want to do the rapid fire with him, Jay? Or you... Well, we were testing it out for another thing,

which will be revealed at a later time and day. Got it. Blake, anything you want to leave the people with? I love release recovery. I love upstate New York. I love my family. I love my case manager, great friend, boss. mentor Zach Clark. I love all of you.

Zach Clark podcast. Let's go. Let's go. Clark Show. Hight, man. Thanks, Blake.