The Zac Clark Show - The Hard Conversations That Need To Be Had ... Welcome To The Zac Clark Show

Episode Date: April 16, 2024

We need the right voices to be heard now more than ever - Substance Use Disorder, Mental Health, Trauma, Suicide, Recovery. These are the hard issues of our time. Welcome to the Zac Clark Show.

all right so breaking news shocker i am uh i'm starting a podcast and this is something that i fought and i fought and i fought for a couple reasons one everyone has a podcast and i was convinced that there's people out there that know how to do this so i don't need to do it and two you know there's a there's always like this imposter syndrome that fear that no one will actually listen. And so what happened was I started talking to some friends and I started to just live my life. And what I found out is that people actually do care about what I'm saying. People do care about my work specifically in behavioral health care. But some other parts of my life too, the running, the fitness, some Philadelphia sports fans.

And I have a stack of DMs piled up in my social media inboxes of people asking for help. And it's impossible for me to keep up with every single one of those DMs. And so what we're going to do here is we're going to let it rip. And when we finally came to the decision to have a podcast, which again, it took some serious convincing. that my voice and that my story mattered. We started to kind of poke around, we talked to a bunch of studios and some folks that were in the business,

and I kind of said, fuck it. Like, let's find some people. Shout out Zach and Jake and Nikki B. That know a little bit about this, and let's do this shit on our own. So we're not attached to any studios. There's not a producer that's going to be in my ear telling me to pipe down on the heroin

or the crack talk. And that's by design because I believe that we need to have a level of authenticity around the conversations that I want to have that I'm not sure that the world's actually ready for. Like I'm not actually sure that we're ready for the level of authenticity and the language that we're going to use to talk about some of the shit that's going on in the world, specifically around, you know, substance use disorder, mental health, overdose. suicide, fentanyl, domestic violence, we're going to open this thing up and we're going to have real conversations. And the point of the podcast is this, alluding back to kind of like my earlier point that everyone has a podcast because they do. I'm in the club now. I also believe that most people with some level of public image has had their story told has had an opportunity to be a guest on a podcast.

And so while there may be some notable guests from time to time, the people that I am going to focus on and the people whose voice I want to amplify are the ones that actually have the solutions to the problems that our country is facing when it comes to behavioral health care. So who are those people? They're doctors, they're psychiatrists, they're therapists,

their recovery coaches, their sober companions, their delivery room nurses. They're the people that are actually doing the groundwork day in, day out, and our experts. You know, one of the things my dad told me early on in my life is he said, son, you've got to hire people that are smarter than you. And we're going to take that energy into this podcast. We're going to have people on this podcast that are smarter than me,

that have been doing this work for a really long time, that understand what addiction is, what trauma is, how suicide happens. But more importantly, my hope is that we're not going to live in the problem. I feel that oftentimes I see a lot of people talking, whether it's on social media or television, and they're reporting on the problem, right? Just this week there was this tragedy down in Baltimore, you know,

and all you hear are the horror stories. There's nothing that we're going to be able to do to bring those people back, but what's the solution afterwards? How are we lifting people up? How are we providing the families who lost loved ones with the support that they deserve and the support that they need? So that's a long way of saying

we're going to hope to offer solutions to people and just grow a grassroots kind of thing here where if there's a specific issue that you or your family or the world is dealing with, we hope to cover that issue and bring in someone who can really speak on their expertise around that issue. And I'm excited.

I'm excited. I was not excited. I was actually a hater of this project for a very, very long time. And that's my own shit, which I'm going to share plenty of that throughout this journey. You know, my goal is to be vulnerable and honest and tell people how it is because I believe like the world kind of deserves that. And we're starting to lack that more and more. I mean, I even go on to, you know,

Instagram and Twitter and you know I see people and you just know right you just know when someone's acting or they're not being kind of real to who they are so I'm excited uh we're still tweaking some names like we might be aggressive and call it unfuck it with Zach Clark because I feel like that's the approach that we need to take right that's the approach we need to take and hopefully people feel inspired. And like I always say, if one person listens and one person, you know, gets the help that they need for whatever it is that they're going through,

then we absolutely did our job and this whole thing was worth it. Now, obviously, I hope we make a much greater impact than that. And, you know, the other thing that I've just been thinking about and it's a good place to start for this kind of like this first episode is I've told my story so many times. You know, I've told my story on national television. I've told my story on podcasts. I've been interviewed by news reporters,

but I've never really owned my story, right? And that's another kind of mission for me in this podcast is to take my story back and to utilize it and to tell it the way that it deserves to be told because it's mine and it's the truth. And I own that shit, right? And so if you're listening to this, you don't know who I am. It's pretty easy for me to provide a little intro here.

I think the most important thing about me when I introduce myself is I'm someone that's 12 and a half years off drugs and alcohol. And I say that because at 27 years old with a needle in my arm and a crack pipe in my mouth, I was left for dead. And having had the opportunity, I mean, given the gift to go away to treatment and turn my life around, the last 12 and a half years of my life have been truly beyond my wildest dreams. And my goal is that hopefully, like, as a society, we can apply stories like that to the greater world. Sure, my story is one of drug addiction and theft and whatever you want to call it.

But there's a lot of people out there, especially in today's world, that are struggling. And that's just where I always start when I tell my story. But the long and short of it is, I'm Zach, Zach Clark. I grew up in South Jersey. I'm a diehard Philadelphia sports fan. I had a super normal upbringing. I love my family. I love athletics.

I love fishing. I love the Jersey Shore. Like I'm a pretty simple dude. And then, you know, as life kind of carried on into college after high school and my illustrious drinking career in high school, I went to college out in Pennsylvania, and that's really when I started to kind of like lose myself, is what I'll say at age 19.

You start to experiment with drugs. You start to, you know, have more serious relationships. There's more responsibilities. It's not just this kind of like adolescent existence. And, you know, what happens? between entering into college and the age of 25 when I was diagnosed with a brain tumor is that I partied and I ran around and I had no consequences and you know I had nothing that was going to really stop me from behaving the way that that I was behaving and so one of the things

as we move forward in this podcast is like that college experience for a man in college like I never knew that it was okay to ask for help I never knew that it was okay to go to therapy like all these things that feel really gross and yucky and soft at age 40 today. I actually know them to be some of the most heroic things I can do for myself and, you know, give to other people is to make those suggestions and find a place where you can really be open and vulnerable. And so, look, I'm going to keep it pretty tight because this is the first episode and we're going to really get into it with a lot of our guests around my story

and just my experience. really do believe that my experience and my story is my greatest gift. It's better than any college degree. It's better than any doctorate. It's better than any piece of paper. You know, my experience running around the streets of Canada, cop and dope, running from cops, lying, cheating, stealing. And that like survival mode that I went into for the last couple years of my drug use. And now having turned that into my greatest asset is something that I truly believe. And so my story is kind of like I had the normal American upbringing. You know, I'm one of five kids, college, drugs, partying, got my first job out of college, was dating a

girl that I would eventually marry, you know, and somewhere along the way, my brain had this predisposition to the dopamine hit that drugs and alcohol provide. And it grabbed the hold of me and there was no turning back. And by the age of, you know, I guess, 24 and a half, I'm in a hospital bag getting a brain tumor cut out of my head. That only sped up the problem because now I'm introduced to painkillers and opiates and some of the things that I truly fell in love with. So, yeah, long story short, 24 tumor by 20.

six and a half, well, Mary June of 2009, by October of 2010, I'm in rehab for the first time. And by August of 2011, I'm in rehab for the last time. So it happened quickly, and I'm grateful

for the people that stuck by me, and I'm sure that at some point in time, my mom, my dad, who knows, maybe even get my ex-wife in here and have some conversations just about. the way that I was and the way that I am today. And the whole reason that I tell my story is because it's comfortable to me, it's my truth,

and I have found the more that I tell my story, the more that I am honest, and the more that I am vulnerable, the more people are attracted to that, and they come back to me and say, you know, the way that you were able to open up, the way that you were able to explain that resonated with me, and I was able to kind of push forward and get some help

and then fuck man after that from 27 to 40 to the last 13 years I moved to New York City right after rehab and everyone in my life thought it was a terrible idea because New York City is expensive and the people are suck and it smells it smells bad and whatever else you want to say

about New York which all isn't true I want to make sure that New York hears that it's all not true I've done my own research and development around the city it's become my safe place and I've been here for 13 years And the life I have today is fucking outrageous.

You know, I think there's some things about me that through my call it public persona, people don't know. I mean, I'm a CEO and a founder of a pretty large company here called Release in New York City. And I'm an entrepreneur. I love business. I love people. I love connecting. Right. So I'm hoping to bring on some thought leaders and some business leaders and some people that have been through the grind of,

of starting a company, getting punched in the face. Like, I have many, many, many times. And I always say, like, I love, I fucking love making mistakes because at the end of the day, when you make a mistake, there's only one thing to do, and that's to learn and to grow. And that's kind of my life in a nutshell. So there's that piece of it. I'm a runner.

I've run, you know, 12 marathons. I'm training for my 13th right now. So that's a big part of my life. Again, a big sports fan. But the main focus is really just going to be on the behavior. healthcare stuff because I I actually believe and people think I'm crazy that the drug use and the substance abuse and the mental health issues that we see on the daily on the reg in this country are at the core of our issues and the core of our problems and I'm not here

to tell people to stop taking their medication or that they have to get sober but what I am here to say is that there's like oftentimes an easier way to live that we didn't know about and that involves some things that are really god-given like exercise and moving around and meditation and some things that I found in my life and have proven to be to be very very very valuable and then we're going to you know talk about some serious shit like trauma because I believe like everyone in this world has trauma no matter how big or small that I is whether it's your high school girlfriend breaking up with you losing your parents at a young age your parents getting divorced being adopted like we all in some way shape or form have trauma

and there's actually solutions there's actually things that we can do to heal and grow and forgive and accept and that shit's beautiful to me today in this world so I'm excited you know I'm excited and the last like I think I'll just close with this like the last mission I have, or the last, I guess I'll leave you with this story, which I think is fucking hilarious and it's just some of the shit that I think we'll hear here. I get a lot of people that come up to me and they say, Zach, you don't look like a drug addict. You don't look like an alcoholic. My first question is like, what does an alcoholic or a drug addict look like? Can you show me a picture? Is there something like, you know,

I get it, like the person under the bridge with the brown paper bag. Is that like really, like are we that small-minded that we really believe that still in 2024 as you can tell I have a pretty adverse reaction to someone saying that but then I kind of like tell them a story I was like well let me tell you this story and maybe this will convince you that I'm a I'm a drug addict it was this is so fucking wild so when I was probably in between my my first rehab and my second rehab. So early to middle 2011, my dope habit had gotten out of control. I'm probably putting $3 to $400 a day of heroin into my arm and smoking, you know, another couple hundred dollars of crack a day. So my my addiction, if you will, or my substance use disorder had

reached its height, had reached his peak and nothing was really working. But when you're that far into it, you have no choice but to continue to get higher else you get death. sick like it's an illness that withdrawal is an illness that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy and so I figured out this like I would game the system and for my fellow folks that love drugs out there like you will identify with this we will do anything to get cash and so what I was doing at the end is I had a credit card and I would go to the liquor store and in Jersey basically when you get a barrel a keg of beer you put a deposit down for 20 bucks so that if you don't bring the barrel back,

they get to keep the $20 that it costs them to buy the keg or replace the keg or whatever it is. So my crazy ass would go to a liquor store. I would buy two barrels of beer. I would throw them in my trunk on the credit card, right? So there's no cash involved here. And then I had another liquor store down the street that would take back my barrels and give me the cash for it.

In between the transactions, I would basically drive into the woods near my house, and I would have a keg party for one. basically pop my trunk, I'd tap the keg, I would drink beers until I was drunk, and then I would basically empty the kegs until they were like acceptable enough to take packs so that I wouldn't be found out, right? Because God forbid, I take a full keg back. And I would go, I would go to the other liquor store, I would take them back the barrels, they would give me $40. I would take that $40, and I would go right in the can and into the drug set and buy four bags of dope.

And so despite the fact that I might not look like a drug addict, there are lots of stories like that that confirm for me that I cannot safely do drugs or drink alcohol. And I'm sure we will get into a lot of those. But that's for the folks that say you don't look a certain way. And hopefully there's someone out there that hears that story and says, I did something really similar. So I'm excited for the ride.

I'm excited for the journey. Again, I have no idea what the hell is going to have. happen with this but we got some cool people behind it we got some smart people behind it and we're going to let it rip as we always do and have some real conversations and hopefully help some people along the way so i'm zach and i'll see you with episode number two we have a special guest thank you