Therapuss with Jake Shane - Session 114: Thomas Doherty

Episode Date: April 4, 2026

I used to think Florida was at the top of the map... Tell Me What's Wrong at ⁠ passthatpuss.com Follow Thomas! @thomasadoherty Follow Me! Instagram | @passthatpuss TikTok | @octopusslover8 Listen to "THERAPUSS" Spotify: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/1BHDdC0OVuHqZ706FobfOF ⁠⁠Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/therapuss-with-jake-shane/id1723626781⁠⁠ Amazon Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/93117357-1f23-46e1-8f26-88f5182a68b8/therapuss-with-jake-shane⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hi Pussy, surprise. Welcome back to Therapus. Today we have on Thomas Doherty, star of Season 2 of Paradise. He was also in the Gossip Girl reboot and Tell Me Lies, and he is also a very good friend. But for the intro today, we have my dear friend, Will Hunt. Hi. Hi, everybody. Are you serious?

Will and I have discovered that adult friendships require grace. I need grace. And Will's. But not too much grace. Let me tell you. What do you mean? Grace can only go so far. Will and I haven't seen each other in about three months.

Yeah. It's been a little too long. Well, he's been writing, you've been writing in Nashville. Yes, I have. I've done some session. Will's new song worth fighting for is out now. You should all stream it. It's amazing.

Any other life updates from you? Not really. A little Southern male. And we've got a lot to cover, baby. Like what? I don't know. I haven't seen you in a minute. So.

Is this a little awkward? awkward or what? Do you have any questions for me? No, I feel like we've covered a lot of the bases. Yeah, I agree. You don't watch Paradise? No, but I need to start. Did you watch season one?

I did, yes. Well, it's amazing. Season two is amazing. Okay, well, I'm going to start it tonight. Are you working on any new music currently? I am, yes. Any songs you're excited about? Yeah, there's one called Tennessee at 17, and I think it's going to be good.

Ooh, Tennessee at 17. You love country music. Will it always puts me on to good music. You put me on to Devin again. She's so incredible. You also put me on to Carter Faith. I am obsessed with Carter Faith. And you put me on to that, what's that song?

It's a very Americana. Yeah, I have no idea. It's like, it's like, I'm American Dream. Oh, Sierra Farrell. Yeah. She's incredible. Yes. And she plays her own instruments.

It's insane. Yeah, Will. She's one of the best live performers. Who should we put on right now besides you? Oh my gosh, that's a really good question. Who is, who are you, who do you have your eye on? Well, who are, what are you listening to? Grace Ives.

Grace Ives. Yeah, your new album is phenomenal. Okay, Grace Ives. The production's insane. I think she's brilliant. Sarah Kinsley. You put me on to Sarah Kinsley. You put me on to everything.

My favorite thing in the world is listening to music in Will's car. Oh, Jake. I do that. I miss that. Well, I haven't been here. Well, I haven't been here. I get that. We're seeing Project Hail Mary on Thursday.

I'm really excited for that. Yeah. Have you seen it? Twice. So good. Twice. Oh, it's one of those? Yeah.

What's it about, though? I don't honestly. No, go in blind, though. Go in blind. It's about space. Yeah. Oh. It'll be fun.

Okay. Yeah, I'm excited. Um, okay, well, Will, I love you. Thomas, I love you. Pussies, enjoy the episode. I love you guys. Hi, Pussies. Welcome back to Therapus.

Well, it's just another day in paradise because we have. Thomas Doherty. We have Thomas Doherty on the podcast, and it's Doherty. Doherty. My first question to you was, we are actually old friends. Yes, we go way back. So how? We were meant to do this last year.

Okay, but how did we become friends? Because I forget. Everyone kept asking me, and I kept saying, I don't know. We were at the Tommy Hilfiger show. And I came out to you, and I was like, oh my God, you did. Yeah. He did. I was so gagged.

I was like, wait high. And then we became friends, and then you came to my New York show. We went out, we had a night. Yeah. What?

That's what we were doing the whole night. The whole night. Hi, pussy. Well, you're in my favorite show on television. Yeah, I know. You told me. How are you finding in season two?

I think season two, I'm not even just saying this because you're in it. I think it's better than season one. How was it starting on the outside of the bunker? Like, was that quite jarring? I was upset. I was upset. I missed the B.

Yeah. You know, I missed the bunker and I was like a little, I was, I don't know, I was like not, I'm sorry, I will just like to acknowledge how poorly that joke landed. Like, I really need to just like get that. What you were seeing. Unfortunately, she knew. Unfortunately, she knew. She knew. And I just like, I couldn't get through my next sentence without like acknowledging how bad that was.

So now that we've gotten that out of the way, I did miss the bunker, okay? I did miss the bunker. I'm very happy for James Marzden. I never worked with James, but he was always on set. I'm so happy he wasn't, like, killed off, like, forever, forever, you know? Well, that's an amazing thing that Dan does as well, you know? That's why it's really hard to depress on it

because there's so many flashbacks, flash forwards. Like, you don't really know what's happening. Like, even some of the cast don't know what's happening? Okay, can I give you my theory? Yeah. Obviously, we're getting involved with time travel. No. Maybe.

Yes, we are. I think that you are Sinatra's son that died. Yeah, I literally just crushed that. Am I right or am I right? I mean, it is actually a very, very good theory. See, the thing with all these theories I see, there's always little bits of truth. I'm not saying that that's applicable.

Yeah, but that's why. But there are little bits of truth in all of them. But that's why she's hemorrhaging power. Well, but how would I be her son then? I don't know. Okay, I didn't read, I didn't actually read the theory myself, but I was told it. Someone told you it. Yes.

And then you took it for your own. Yes, but you were that guy's little protege. Yeah. How would you pronounce prodigy? Prodigy. Is it prodigy or protege? Yeah, you can't ask a Scottish person how they pronounce something. It's ridiculous.

What was it like growing up in Scotland? Well, people always ask you this. I have nothing to compare it to it, but it was good, yeah? Like, how is it growing up in a? America. Fine. See? I grew up in New York.

Do you know that about me? I didn't actually know that. I grew uptown. Upper East or Upper West. Washington Heights. Washington Heights. Yeah. And then when did you go over to LA?

For USC. Ah, okay. And he stayed. Yeah, I stayed. Are you going to come back? To here, I just got a place. No way. Oh my God, how happy are you?

Yes, we can hang out all the time. Are you so excited? Yes. Are you so excited? What? No, it's Gorgine. Yeah. So much room for us to hang out.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we, yes, yes, you know. So what was it like working on Paradise? Oh, also, you want to know why I know there is time travel? You don't know that there's time travel. I do know that there's time travel.

Okay. Alex, are you caught up to date? Okay, so obviously they wouldn't just cast Shaley Woodley for four episodes of the fucking show. So we better get to time traveling quick. because there's only eight episodes. I can't confirm nor deny. How do you know she's in four episodes? I'm on the fourth and she just passed away.

Oh, yeah, that's very true. Yeah, so sad. What a great soundtrack, too. Good soundtrack. Great soundtrack. Well, me and see, we're going to try and, like, do a cover of an Elvis song, but I've never really got to it.

I can sing a little bit. Did you sing in Rocky Horror? I've never been in Rocky Horror, but in Little Shop of Horror, I did sing, yeah. So what's the difference between those? too. Completely different musicals written by different people

at different times. But like what's the difference? What's the difference? Little Shop is about like plants that come alive, right? Yeah. So Little Shop is about a plant that comes alive.

So what were you? I was a guy called Seymour. Me character? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that was amazing. It was really cool to go from Paradise

to then go into doing a musical. What's the difference? Oh God, it's so different. I mean, I always feel like with, filming TV, it's more you sign up for a lifestyle.

I suppose you do for it. I like the lifestyle of a film, like being on a film set. Why? I love being on a film set, and I love kind of traveling around the world to different locations to film. I also just love the, like, structure that's around a film set

with theater, as you know. I do. It's like, I mean, you have to go to the theater at five. And so, I suppose, yeah, you have the day up until 5, but I mean, you don't get home until like 10.30 your adrenaline. Did you sign after?

Yeah, I would sign after. So that takes time. I mean, not as many people as you. How many people are there for you? Like on a night-to-night basis, I would say like 80 to 100 people. Should I be interviewing you? So what's it like being on Broadway? Well, it's amazing.

I do, I do eight shows a week. How many shows do you do? Eight shows a week. Would you do theater again? Oh, my God. I can't wait to do it. do theater again. Yeah, I would love to do like a play.

I just think it's the best practice for any acting is theater, you know? Well, you said that when you, you didn't have a choice, whether to be an actor or not. Yeah, no choice. Why? I don't know. I mean, it's just like, I was going to go to university to do history, but I was like, like, who am I kidding? I can't think of doing, oh my God, like, you want to be a history teacher?

not history teacher but like I don't even know what I wanted to do I just loved history By the way I texted Thomas The other night I FaceTimed him And I was like we I'm about to go on a day tonight

I don't think it's gonna go well Stay on your phone We're going out right Like we are going out And I stayed on my phone I wrote in all caps three times Do not bail Do not bail

Do not bail Three times Who do you think bailed Because it wasn't fucking me Yeah I've And then he said, he said, he texted me at 3 a.m. Me getting blown off is crazy. No, it wasn't even that late.

It was like 12. Yeah, and I said, and I think I was like, And he didn't even respond until the next scene was like, I'm so sorry. But I would like to say, though, like, life is more colorful when you are, like, romantically involved with someone. Like, I'm in such a good mood today, and it's not going to last. No, I don't think it will last. I love, you're some lust.

What is the difference? If you don't know the difference, love and lust, love is like I'm obsessed, right? Yeah, you can like fall and lust with people. Are you having fun? I am having fun. I'm still scared of what's going to come out of your mind.

Okay, well, I've one last thing to ask. This actually wasn't, we're trying this new segment called Manny's Corner, and Manny likes to write questions for the guest. So, Manny, can I read one of yours? Oh, look at that. Magic. Thank you so much.

Okay, ready? This is... Just looking at a publicist. Okay. So I just want to let you know that these are from many. Your dad was a banker. You worked at a place called Tiger Lily, and you worked as Captain Hook's son.

What other Peter Pan parallels do you have, and why do you have so many? How am I supposed to even... Have you seen Peter Pan? Yeah, of course. Of course I have. I have not. Point of contention.

What's the question again? Ask me the question. Oh, gladly. It's so well written, right? Shout out, manny. Your dad was a banker. You worked at a place called Tiger Lily. Uh-huh.

A Tiger Lily? Isn't that that little gadget store? No, Tiger Lily was a restaurant in Edinburgh. And I didn't have it. I worked there after I finished college. So I worked there as a... Oh my God, I would have loved to go to college with you. It was fun.

Did you have, like, the best time ever? I did have a lot of fun. Well, I was in theater. So it wasn't like... Okay. So we're like, yeah. Okay, a few more questions. Okay.

When you were... I've not even finished... Well, you said you didn't know how to answer it. Are you? I'm sorry. What other Peter Pantera loves do you have in your life? What other Peter Pan Paral? I don't know.

I like green. He likes green? Oh, he wears green. Green's your favorite color? Green's my favorite color, yeah. Well, your eyes are kind of like... I know. You have amazing eyes.

Okay, so... Okay, a few more, a few more questions. When you... See what I mean? This is why I don't know what the fuck he's about to say. You were a maid with a bunch of Polish women. Did you learn any fun Polish expressions? No, I didn't.

And they never really spoke to me. I mean, they were all like 50 and above. And I, again, was just like a college. What do you mean? They didn't talk to me. They would all just laugh at me because they thought it was hysterical. That you were a...

It was just like 17-year-old kid cleaning people's rooms. What's the crate... Oh. I'm trying. This is obviously, I mean, I was a teenager, so he was going to party, and this is when the Edinburgh Fringe was on. Have you ever been to the Edinburgh Fringe? No, but you know what?

I'm planning to go this year. You need to do Edinburgh Friends. I'm planning to go this year. Okay, we need to figure something out. Would you go? Yeah, 100%. And we could have fun at Edinburgh? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll show you around.

Edinburgh. Okay, so what was it like, so what? What were you saying? I love you, man. I love you. This is so fun. Are you having fun? Um, what was your question?

What one? Where are we? The Polish expression. The Polish, they didn't speak to me. They would just laugh at me because they thought it was ridiculous. And this hotel didn't have any stairs. So I had to, like, sorry, didn't have any elevators. So it was like an old, like, townhouse.

So I had to haul all of these sheets up five flights of stairs and clean people's rooms and their bathrooms and stuff. And I'd start at five o'clock in the morning. But obviously I was a teenager and I was going out and party and having a fly. So I would set a timer on my phone for two minutes, and every room I'd go in and have a sleep on their bed for two minutes. Oh, yeah, you'd sleep. Oh, that leads me perfectly into another one of Mani's questions.

Okay, perfectly. I'm like, I don't know what you. So you used to sleep in hotel rooms when you were a maid and eat the food when you were a waiter. Has a boss ever liked you? I feel like that. Hey, but... Did you like, did you get along with your bosses?

I did, yeah. It's easier in America to get away. What? Yeah, with a Scottish accent in Scotland, it doesn't go as far. But here you're charming. Here, the Scottish accent. People forget. I forget.

I mean, he answered the phone yesterday, and I was like, oh, my God, I forgot you were Scottish. Yeah. I literally forgot. I arranged to meet up, and we didn't because you... I had to catch a dick. I'm sorry. I had to. Listen, you got to what you got to do?

I had to do it. Yeah. Okay, so what was the craziest thing you saw? when you worked as a maid. I know, this is so annoying because it's like, it's perfect for a good story, but honestly, nothing really. You had just like nice people coming in house.

Just like nice people, like it was a really, it was like a nice old hotel. So there was no like fun. There's no parties or anything. People were quite boring. Yeah, that's okay. Yeah. I know it was so perfect for like a good,

you never saw a good story. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. You weren't ever like, so yeah, I guess, because you never spoke to the Polish woman. You were never like,

You guys see this? Yeah, nothing. No. What jobs would you have? We ever... Oh, yes, I did actually. I worked a lot of internships. So I worked...

What did you go to college for? Public relations. What is that? So public relations is like what Alex does. Like, I was going to be a publicist. That's what I wanted to do. That would have been so funny. I know, but I realized now I couldn't have done it because I...

You're the star. I'm the star. Yeah. Or I would like to be. Yeah, no, you know what I mean. So what was it like filming? Where did you film? Yes.

Tell me everything. Okay, yeah. So, I mean, it was amazing. It was definitely this time in my career. I've done 10 years in the industry now, you know, so I feel like I've done, I always looked at it as an apprenticeship for the industry, just trying to learn as much. And also just find my feet. I mean, you know yourself. It's really strange.

There's so many moving pieces. I mean, it took me so long to even know the difference. between an agent and a manager. So I think for the first 10 years, I was like figuring that out and then figuring myself out and living in L.A. and then living in New York and then getting bits of attention and fame. And it's just, it's kind of weird to time process in your brain.

Right. But I feel like I'm in a really, really good place with all of that and I have a great relationship with that. And Paradise was the real kind of definitely feeling. like the turning point for me in my career in terms of having a little bit more of a creative voice with things and what do you mean creative voice i don't know i mean i just i think that i'm on sets with these well-established directors and i mean this is prior the last 10 years i'm with more experienced actors with very experienced producers and executive producers and directors and

cinematographers, you know? So I definitely had to, like, be quiet and listen and learn. But now it definitely feels like, in Paradise, definitely kind of took that out of me. And, I mean, being surrounded by Shaley Moody, shout out, love you. She's amazing. How unbelievable is it. She's, like, really, like, amazing. And she, I always, always, I always looked up to her, like, for so long, I've always thought that she's never got her, like.

Flowers? What does that mean? To give someone their flowers. It's like credit. Your credit, yeah, for how good she actually is. But just the nicest human being as well. Really amazing person and drops into character like I've never seen before. And so working with her and listening to her and Sterling Kay Brown and Julianne Nicholson and James and all of them.

really kind of watched the way that they worked professionally, but also how they moved around the world. It was just such humility. They weren't trying to show and they weren't trying to perform and be like, I'm an actor kind of thing. It was that, like, confidence and that knowing that they had. Yeah, so just seeing how they move and, like, how they conduct themselves in the world and in the industry,

as people, that was it. Yeah. And, I mean, you probably know. Sorry, that was really aggressive. Nope. Okay. you know yourself trying to find your feet and like find your voice but not overshooting it I don't know I don't know about the second part but but finding that

balance and obviously being true to to the work and not compromising your authenticity for for what's going to work you know what's going to what's going to what do you mean by that compromising your authenticity for what's going to work I mean taking job I mean like you're again you're still trying to figure out and so it's times in your career you're equating fame and public acknowledgement for success but it's not necessarily you don't necessarily feel fulfilled so I've always gave myself that 10 years I was like this is going to be like fining my foot and I'm going to fuck up here and I'm going to like be really successful here but that's kind of you know right and so now I definitely feel very grounded with it and with that

It's amazing because then I'm not trying to perform. I'm not trying to prove anymore. And so my brain feels clearer. And I feel like I'm living more from here and going after projects, more from this space, which is really amazing. That's amazing. I'm so happy for you. Yeah, it's really, it is.

It's really amazing, man. And just being on that show was just incredible. Like Dan Vogelman as well, just the best. Showrunner. Showrunner. Totally. So yeah, it was just an incredible experience, and I can't wait to go and do more of it.

Gag. Yeah. Well, I just saw that it's ending after, what, five seasons, they said? Three. What? Did they say that? No, it came out, so there's no worries, but when is Paradise ending?

I think it was three. Dan's always said he's going to do three. Okay, and you know what I love about that? I love a show that knows the story it wants to tell, and it's not just on the air to be on the air. Yeah, me too. And I think that's where a lot of shows have kind of lost the plot.

A show that, like, knows the story. Like, my favorite show of all time is this show called Dark. Never heard of it. Oh my God, you would love it. It's German. Why would I love it? I'm from Scotland.

Well, they're close by. I mean, relatively. You've never been in Germany? I have been to Germany. I've never been to Germany. Why are you supporting this argument? Well, it's an amazing show, and it's only three seasons,

and it's only supposed to be three seasons. I love a three season show. I think it should be three. I think, like you say, like, you know, the story that it's trying to tell, you know where it's going. This prolog.

I think there's exceptions, though. I think shows like the office. Yeah, I don't know. I've tried. I've really, really, I haven't, like, really tried, but it's like, I've seen all the edits of Jim and Pam,

so it's like, all right, I feel like I've seen the show. Yeah, but that's a boring part. Jim and Pam part. I think that would, people would disagree with that. Of course. People disagree with everything.

Really? Well, you tell me. You're on podcast. Right, right. That's what I was saying before I came here. I was like, obviously can't say anything stupid. But even like, you don't even have to. I say stupid stuff all the time.

You know, I used to think that Florida was at the bottom of the map. What, like Antarctica? Wait, what? No, like, I thought it went. It is at the bottom of America. Oh, sorry, I thought it was at the top. You thought it was at the top? Yes, I used to think it went New York, Florida, Los Angeles.

That's really. stupid. Yeah. I also didn't know that Moses. From New York as well. Yep. I also didn't know that Moses and Jesus were two separate people. I thought they were the same person. And I discovered in college, in the class, they kept talking about Moses Jesus, Moses Jesus. And I kept like referring to them as the same person. And my best friend, Julia, was like, do you think that they are the same person? And I was like, yes. Like, were you brought up Christian? No, I'm Jewish.

You're Jewish. Were you brought up Jews? like culturally what are you are you Catholic? I was brought up Catholic yeah you're so Catholic really what does that mean you're just like Scottish

no but Scotland's a Protestant country what is Protestant Protestant? Protestant's just another sect of Christianity so many Catholics are like I know it's so stressful so many but Catholics are like the hardcore so what I was told

I always grew up like thinking it was like just chill normal but apparently were where's your family very religious Like church Sunday. Kind of, though.

My grand. She always tells me I'm going to go to hell. Why? Never really, I mean, she's 101. Good for her. Right, 101. Is she like happy?

Yeah. I mean, I think she's ready to go for sure. Like, at that age, do you think you'd be like, I'm out? At that age, I start, like, choplifting and stuff. Well, at that age, it's just like, like, do you think she wakes up? And it's like, every day is a blessing, or is she, like, Why am I still here? She's like, oh, for fuck.

Yeah, right. Right. Yeah. But, like, good for her, 101. 101. How did she not smoke cigarettes ever? She did. She smoked until she was 50.

And I asked her actually, maybe last year, I was like, I am, because I used to smoke. And I was like, do you miss it? You used to smoke? Yeah, I don't smoke. I don't smoke cigarettes anymore. You don't vans. Oh, you don't vape either? Sorry.

You don't vape? I don't vape anymore, no. Because it's kind of, I feel like when you. get past 30 in your vaping. How old are you? 30. Oh my God. Okay, cool.

How old do you think I am? 30. I'm doing it. 28? 26. 26. Why is it? Because you hold yourself

like older. But you look so young. Thank you. I've been drinking a lot of water. Do you drink a lot of water? Do you drink a lot of water? Like, do you make a point to drink a lot of water? Yeah.

I think maybe a couple liters a day. Shut up. Yeah. Shut up. That's what you should do. How do you do that? I've got like this little um girlie mug you know like all the all the girlies have the oh like what's like keep going no no like that one almost there yes yes you know I have one of those

like you know the girlies at equinox they have like the big ones with a straw Stanley Stanley's yeah so I have one of them and I have it in my fridge I'm just going to tell you and I fill it up twice a day and drink it what do you fill it up with top Top water? No, I have a filter in my fridge. Okay. So, like, one of those things. But you have to put salt in water.

Why? Because if you just drink straight water, it just goes straight through you. So if you put a pinch of salt, it gives the water something to attach to it. And so it actually, ironically, how you drinks you, just a pinch of salt. Yeah. Because it gives something for it to, I, fuck, I hope this is right. Some scientists will come. See, you can't say anything.

No. But I think that is right. I think you need to like just say no to the boys for now and just like really build up that self-esteem and that I had to do it as well. Really? Really bad, yeah. I like definitely compromise my authenticity for attachment,

which is very unhealthy. Okay, you use a lot of big words. And I know that what you are saying makes sense. But you thought Florida was love New York. I need you to explain what you mean by sacrificing your authenticity for attachment. Like you were being somebody else in order to maintain a relationship? I would, yeah, I would compromise.

Not, I wouldn't be somebody else, but I would definitely compromise things that were authentic to me to make sure that I wasn't about it. It's all childhood stuff. Right, okay, totally. And a wonderful family and upbringing, but I mean, everyone, everyone's fucked. Yeah.

childhood. And so I did. I definitely, definitely would do that. Which isn't fair to the person, of course. Like, what do you mean? Like, give me an example. I'll give you an actual example.

Okay. I remember I was with this girl, who I was in a relationship with. And she was like, I like guys with gold jewelry. I like gold jewelry. So, obviously you bought gold jewelry. But I, like, like, silver jewelry.

Right. But I would compromise what I authentically like silver jewelry so that she would like gold jewelry on me, so that she would like me, so she would, do you know what I mean? And that's a bad thing? Yeah, that is a bad thing. How do you not see that that's a bad thing? It's just gold jewelry.

But the principle of the thing, and then you can start to, then you're not living authentically. Okay, that's fair. And then you can become resentful. Okay, can we survey the room? Is that a bad thing? It depends what mindset you're doing it from.

Oh, Louise, like, is, isn't it? She's fucking Mrs. High Horse. Like, I can't with her. Exactly. Okay, that's fine. That's fine. And it's all, like, stemmed from... Do you think I've already been sacrificing things that are authentic to me?

I think you will 100%. Really? Definitely. Am I wrong, survey in the room? Yeah. Like, what? What have I sacrificed so far? Because you aren't, like...

you have insecurities and you're not confident and loving enough on yourself. Wait, so you've been working for, you would say, 10 years now? It's been 10 years, yeah, I got my first, I started with Disney. Oh my God, you were in the descendants. I was, yeah. Oh my God, I totally forgot about that. And how quickly did that happen? So you started when you were, you started pursuing this when you were 20.

I started pursuing, so I went to college when I was 17, and I was there for three years. and then I came out of college and I did a play in the fringe and that's why I was working in Tiger Lily because I couldn't really afford to live in London and Edinburgh in Londoner about an hour away on a flight so I used to work during the day

get on a plane on my days off and fly down to London and just steal my friend's sofas for two days and just do like meet cast and directors and try and fit in auditions and try and make it work but I didn't I really didn't have

this isn't some like annoying story but I really didn't have that much money and had an amazing parents who were like you got to figure it out yourself they would always would have given me whatever I needed but good parent in there thanks mom and dad oh that's great and you seem like you're from a good family

yeah they're great um but I'd get the night bus back up to Edinburgh which was like 10 hours or something and then I would get off the night bus it got showered and stuff and then go to work again wow so I really like put in a graph to try and make this work and then Disney happened So that definitely changed my life.

How old were you when Disney happened? 20. So two years, two years of hard work. And you got to send out? No, not even like six months. Okay. Wow. And then when did the Gossip Girl reboot happen?

Oh, and then I did a bunch of jobs in between and then after COVID. During COVID. Actually, we were meant to go and then COVID happened in 2020. And how pumped were you when you found out you got Gossip Girl? I was excited. I was, I was. I was told it would be more kind of, because I wasn't that keen at the time to do a gossip girl, gossip girl.

But I was told it be more kind of euphoria, kind of sprinkled into it. Why weren't you keen to do gossip girl at the time? Again, a 24 finding my feet, comparing how my career should be, what I should be, how I should be seeing, all that ego stuff. What did you think now that you're past it? What did you think this is how I should be seen and this is what my career should be? Like, what did you think?

I think, what do I think I should have been? No, what did you like think at the time? Oh, at the time. I mean, you always compare yourself to other actors that are doing, which is the worst thing you can possibly do. But I mean, you're looking at amazing actors like Shalami or whoever else was kicking around then. And they were doing really these amazing things.

films that are going to like award seasons and stuff. And so then your ego flares up and you're, you're insecure and you're like, oh no, I want to be cool and like, I want to do all this cool stuff. It was an incredible job, incredible opportunity. I made incredible people. They've got best friends to this day. Do you meet, have you met Eli? I have met him.

Yeah. I met him at Tennis at the Tennis at the Trey in Los Angeles. Just the best guy. Yeah. He is so, so lovely. Oh, just the best. So he is the one you're so close with? Yeah, I was just staying with him and his girlfriend right now.

Okay, so you feel more of the story. Do you find yourself, you're like, for the past five years since Gossip Girl, like you were reaching for this thing and you were comparing yourself and you finally feel like you're at this stage where you're like maybe just happy? All of that stuff was definitely symptomatic

of a much deeper thing of I wasn't able to validate myself. ultimately is kind of what I see that now. And so the best or the worst place depends where you are in the journey of validation is Hollywood. You know? Because you're getting all this validation. You have this opportunity to get all that external validation.

And no matter how much I got, no matter how much I tried, it was never, it was never filling me. So what was the moment that you let go of that? I didn't have a choice. What do you mean? It just wasn't myself.

I completely lost myself. And it was a kind of weird thing to say when you're like, well, how could you lose something that you don't know? You know, I think I grew up in all my energy. I was very hyper-vigilant to my surroundings and what was going on outside. So I never really like properly developed a sense of torment. You know, and I was always very kind of,

out there and theatrical and very performative and that all kind of just carried through and so I think maybe a year ago

I had a point where it became crystal clear what it was that I was trying to do I was trying to fill this void inside of me with other people

and no matter how hard you try you will never and so then I stopped doing that and two things took a beat and sat through some pain, you know, you can't run away from it. And I tried it all with everything, fame, money. And like, none of it.

It just makes everything worse. And I got to a point where I was like, this is my only way out. And luckily, I love acting so much so I can always go back to that. That's always been very, that's been really stable. It's been a stability for me. and I was like, you know what? I'm going to just go back into that and have this as my friend

and just work through things and develop this sense of self and self-acceptance and self-love and try and meet all that shame face on because it all just leads to one thing. You know, you try and avoid this shame by doing this shameful thing and then because of that you're like ashamed

and then you want to escape that shame and then you ultimately end up, you know? So it's like, It's just a downward spiral. You went through these like wax and waning periods of like, you'd have a project and you'd get attention and then you wouldn't and then you wouldn't and then you wouldn't and I think was that hard for you? Um...

Is that what you were trying to say or did I misread it entirely? No, that I mean that's definitely an aspect of it to kind of, again, the inability to... And I'm not trying to like preach. Don't take my like word. No, this is your truth. This is your truth. but yeah it all boiled up

to like relatively recently to this like clarity that I had of if I, this is this is the only way it is the only way to be able to self-regulate and self-validate. That's it. And you were surrounded by such lovely people that you worked with that didn't share that mindset

that were like went to work as like this is you know my job like this is like as you were saying at the very beginning of the show you were like these people didn't have an ego like they were they like really loved acting like you weren't around people about also like like they were all

does that make sense? Yeah yeah yeah for sure I mean you're on a healthy set I was on a very very healthy set yeah yeah I mean Dan doesn't take you would never even never survive you know yeah on one of his sets

because he's such an beautiful human and everything the culture on the set is derived from a showrunner and so the culture on the set is just amazing and they've all worked together for so long but I think no everything everything truly

happens for a reason I know I do do believe that I mean and I've not lost anyone that is close to me in my life apart from my grandmother when I was like 15 how old was she that one 90 90

Yeah Probably like similar vibe Of Like old I'm good Okay yeah yeah Like ready yeah Right yeah very like religious as well

So she's gone up to see the big man Oh do you believe in that I believe in Like a higher power Yeah Yeah But I also believe that we are that power I don't think there's any like moment of

Separation apart from when it's Our brain our ego I think that's the only separation in universally. What is an ego? Like, what is that? I never understood that. I took Freud in high school, I didn't get it.

I didn't. You should be telling me what? The ego and the super ego and all that. I don't know. I love Eckhart Tolly. Do you know Eckert Toley? He did the power of now. He talks about the ego is this false sense of self.

So it doesn't even necessarily, everyone equates the word ego with like, I'm amazing and this Broadway show that I'm doing. But it's more like false. That's why I have this tattooed here. What does that say? It's backwards, so I'm so excited if you try. Okay. Mind if I. Oh, okay.

Let me see, I see a W. Do you mind if I move the necklace? Sorry. Who is this? Who is? Who is this eye? What? Yeah.

So like, I guess it's kind of like come from this idea to challenge this egoic self. Or like what Thomas is. What I believe Thomas is. So it's like a challenging question. There's no punctuation on it. It's very open-ended. People that aren't from America are so smart. It's like painful.

I'm not smart. Clearly. No, no, no. This is just like interest. This has like been so close to. While you are talking to me, like I feel like I'm each word you say. I have to like quickly dictionary it in my head so I can piece the sentence together. Uh-huh.

Do you know what I mean? No, I didn't think I was using the big words. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Dictionary. Do you understand? Yeah, I'm following. Ultimately, it's just like, I was very, I was just, I was just, I was just, I was just, I was just, I was just grown up and I had a lot of insecurities and a complete inability to self-validate.

Yes. And being around, and I've been up and down so, so, so many times. And honestly, turning 30 does something. Well, you know, you just finished your Saturn return. That's right. Do you know what that is? I do know what that is, yeah. Yeah.

People are saying that when I was in the trenches. Oh, it's true. Yeah. She's going through hers right now. Really? What's happening with you? Take the mic. You're going to get a tactic?

Yeah. Take the mic. Like in the beginning stages, so I'm not quite sure what the lesson is yet that I'm... It needed to learn. What was the lesson you thought you learned in your Saturn return? You can only, only you can be happy. And I always thought I needed something to be happy.

Right. And then I realized, oh, you can actually just like be happy. which was a brand new concept to me because I feel like in this world like in the Western world it's always like you're always made to feel ugly or your clothes or your style's bad

but if you buy this product then you're going to be happy then that's going to complete you and then after time it's like you buy a new pair of shoes and then you're so pumped and hyped on them for a week and then you'll do it again and it's five days and then eventually it gets down to like 10 minutes

and you use that you use that mechanism of escapism and false dopamine you wear it out and then you're just left with your shit and then you just got to look at it you just got to go through it or you can

continue to escape but I knew that I saw the mechanisms that I was what I was doing I was so crystal clear on inability to validate myself I had all these insecurities and so I just I didn't have a...

I believe I didn't have a choice. But I'm so grateful for everything that's happened. Okay, that's really beautiful. Otherwise, I wouldn't be here. With me. With you. I can't believe I just did that. So, do you never get...

So my issue that I find is that, like, I want to be happy for happiness sake, but I get so worried that something... Have you ever heard the song Happy and Sad by Casey Musgraves? No. You should listen to it. I love follow your arrow, though. You do?

Isn't that such a good song? She's amazing. She's so good. Have you heard anything else by her? No, just that. Oh my God. Oh my God.

Oh my God. Oh my God. I'm not a big my country music guy. No, like it really. She crosses it. Like it really like, oh my God. She is like so incredible. Like her album, Golden Hour is one of like

it's probably one of the best country albums I've ever heard in my albums I've ever heard in my entire life. Okay. Her wordplay. And the way she's, able to describe these really universal feelings that are so difficult to describe by just kind of like describing them as they are is like so unique like she has this song called happy and sad and it's like about that feeling when you're really happy and you can't like let yourself

be happy because you're so scared and you're so on the defense um of something bad happening so she's the song is about the like anxieties of finding joy and being happy and i just think that there is like nobody else like that really is able to tap into such you like those like real human like experiences like she has like i think she's like so so so incredible okay i'm gonna listen it was it golden golden hour golden one of the best albums of the last 20 years and then also she has a song called Mary Go Round, which is also really incredible. It's probably one of my favorite songs by her. And the word play on Mary Go Round is, like, really, is sick.

It's, like, sickening it. Like, you'll listen to it. And, you know, when you listen to rap music and you kind of, like, make a stank face. Yeah. Like, when you listen to Mary Go Round, you know. Like, you know, you know what I mean? I love Casey Musgraves. I love that.

Does anyone hear listen to Casey Musgraves? How accurate was that description of happy and sad? Okay, I'm going to listen to it. It is the best, like, and it really makes me feel so seen because that is my issue with happiness. It's like, I know I can be happy, and I always try to, like,

like everyone today was like you were in such a good mood, and I keep saying, like, just, I know, but just wait, because it can't last. Because it's based on. It's based on... You're mid, is based on this guy. So that means that you're at the mercy of external forces. So you're never, like, really...

I have a really, really good friend, Josiah, and he is a bit older, and he doesn't look for happiness, he just looks for peace. And I think if you start looking for contentment and peace, it's like the paradox of life. You search for happiness, you can't find it. You stop searching happiness is there.

I'm really into paradoxes of life right now. What's another paradox of life? Okay, I'm not that into paradoxes of life, evidently. But there's a, I really, can someone look up paradoxes of life? There's like major ones. It's like when you stop looking for something that it comes to you. I like Joe Rogan there. That was cool.

Can you look up, uh, is that what he does? Yeah, can you look up. Jamie. Yeah, Jamie. Yeah, that's it. More failures can lead to greater success. Yeah? That's a parodos.

Slowing down can help you speed up in the long run. The harder you push for something, the harder it will feel to achieve. What do you mean? The harder you push for something, the harder it will feel to achieve. What does that mean? Okay, I'll equate it to auditioning. If you're like... That's what I was acquainted, trying, okay, go.

Really want a job. Yeah. You need a job, and you go into the room with the cast and directors. They will smell it off you instantly, the desperation. And they don't want that. Whereas you always hear these stories about people being like, yeah, I didn't, like, want to do it. But, like, I pulled up to the audition and I got the job.

Because there's that element's not there. That, like... Okay. And people can feel that. With Broadway, I had no idea it was going to happen, but, like, it kind of happened by, like, chance. Ashley Park was supposed to be in the play, and I think something happened, and she couldn't do it anymore.

So it kind of... Actually. Yeah. She's lovely. I've never met her. She's really nice. I've heard she is so lovely. Yeah, she's nice.

But that's how that's... play came to me and it's been the best like one of the best experiences in my life but it's not something i like went out and sought after so desperately yeah and that's the that's the whole thing about surrender and honestly as disenfranchising as the world is right now and I just apathetic everyone is like the files coming out and just there is something the silver lining that i can take from it is that there was always like some part of me that felt like I was had control but now like All of this stuff coming out, you're like, oh my God, I have zilch.

Like, I have no control. So then you're like, well, what can you control? And I can control. So no one will be able to take a choice away from you. And so you can still cultivate what you want to feel like. You can control how you react to things and respond to things. And how you share your love with your immediate circle and stuff in life. which goes in with

kind of fundamental religious and spiritual teachings of surrendering and it's almost like you surrender to the thing that's greater than you which is also you and that the universe has always got your back or God's always got you covered and the minute your ego gets involved

that's what happened with me as well your ego you're I try to like control things and make things work but it's never going to happen because I can't do that and I fucked it up so you have to surrender to something much greater than yourself universe god life whatever however you see it and then something happens and there's just this ease to life and then when the ease you start getting a little bit successful your ease

then the ego jumps back in and fucks it all up that's what i found but it's so moved but it's really terrifying because you're so right you have to like go through the hard stuff and then like kind of reacclimate into the peace and into the that and then but your ego will always be there it'll always be there and you just have to learn how to deal with it yeah and that's yeah you have to stay vigilant and meditation is really helpful for that are you finding with paradise and the success of paradise your ego jumping back in at times no not at all actually okay because i've kind of done it done the dance enough that i knew what i was going to come into and so i allow myself to like spike, be proud of myself and all the rest of it during the premiere. And just to like enjoy, enjoy the moment and kind of take a pause to see where I am and what I've achieved. Now, that's a whole other conversation of what I've achieved. I chop it up to good fortune, luck, and the people around me and the experiences that I've been fortunate enough to have in life,

which I've lived another experience which has led to this, you know. But I can't even really take credit for that anymore, not to be sound like a martyr. No, I got it. But I think with, I knew what I was going into, and you can't attach yourself to anything either. What do you mean you can't attach yourself to anything? So, for example, Paradise is coming out, the premiere comes out,

everyone's taking a picture of you, uh, actually you're human. You get like a dopamine hit. Duh. You're sad, I don't know. Yeah. And then it's a nevis. going to come down and then I let it come down and then I kind of move on from that aspect of it and then go back to the acting whereas if I the premiere comes out I attached to that feeling

oh I'm starting to feel a lull but I don't want to feel a low I want to get back up there right right right right released oh my god more perfect and then you attach to that two weeks isn't something else is going to replace it some other show's going to come out someone and then you're just going to be disappointed and then you're going to be like fuck I want to get that feeling again. So you go after that feeling again. And by going after that feeling again, all will do is compromise authenticity with my work

and with who I am to get this almost hit of a drug. And then you're in the weeds and then you start doing this and you start going down. And then you get to a point in a month or in a year or in five years or ten years

where you're like, oh, I'm not myself again. Ah! Because I compromised all of this stuff for ego fulfillment, which is never fulfilled. And the whole nature of the ego, much smarter people can speak on this. But the rudimentary is what I think it is,

is the ego's whole process system is to survive. Like an organism? Kind of, yeah. Like its own thing, its own entity. Wow. So your ego is not your friend? I don't know. Like, would people say it's your friend? I think some people, yeah.

like Andrew Tate, right? Oh, okay. So, like, bad people would say it's your friend. Yeah. Yeah, like, these guys are like, I'll do anything. They'll never do therapy. Right. Are you in therapy?

I am, yeah. How is? It's good. Boy or girl? Girl. Okay. Always girl, yeah. Yeah, I think I need a guy therapist, weirdly enough.

I always try to become the girl's friend. Okay. Okay, that's interesting. I can see that. I always try to become that. Yeah, but if it was a guy, it has to be an ugly guy then, because you're just trying to... I wasn't going to.

say it but yeah like I used to have this doctor he was so hot and I saw him on hinge once and I literally was like do I like him or not and like it took me like 20 minutes honestly it took me an entire day to be like I can't like him no you remember that Louise you probably did it it's like when you're in high school and like the geography teacher's like oh she's so hot or he's so hot did you ever have a thing with the teacher in college no but it's like when you're in high skill and everyone was like, oh yeah, your geography teacher is really hot. But she's not actually hot. It's more the idea that she's a teacher.

It's like your doctor probably wasn't actually that hot. Be honest. Yeah. Okay, do you want to do the Tommy What's Wrongs? Yeah. I was traveling back to my boyfriend city and the flight got delayed. When I told him the arrival was at 4 a.m., he refused to stay up for me and open the door because he needed to sleep. His solution was to just get a long breakfast or nap at the airport.

Is this normal? Wait. No. What? No, that is kind of crazy. That's crazy. At first, I was like, how old is she?

I don't know, but at first, I was like, okay, he didn't want to come get you at the airport at 4 a. I'm like,

that's fine. But if he locked the door and didn't want you to come in and go get a long breakfast. There's someone else in the apartment. That is, yeah. Oh, you think.

So my first instinct, obviously, is to be like break up with him. And I mean that, actually. You know what? I'm going to say that. That's horrible. Well, there's so many factors, though, isn't there? Like, how old are you? How long have you been together

for? If it's north of, like, five months and you're north of 18? So would North be less than five months or more than five months? You're fucking joking. Do you know what? I'm not. No. So, more than, more than, yeah. Okay. You know, I graduated cum laude. I don't fucking believe that. Yeah. Yeah. So I think all these facts, so I think if you're older than 18, if you've been dating more than five months,

that's just awful. Yeah, that's awful. That's really mean. That must, like, that must be sad. And you're traveling to go see your boyfriend. Oh, is that what she's saying? Yes. You got to pull up for sure. My boyfriend's mom follows me on Instagram and watches every single story within seconds and once replied, interesting, to a bikini pick. sure, we were high school sweetheart

but we're almost finished with college. It's weird. Do I block her or is that worse? Yeah, so you can't block her. Do you think that if the mother or father-in-law is like really difficult that that should end a relationship?

It depends. It depends how intrusively are in the relationship. In this situation. In this situation, you're coming in... She's like responding interesting to her bikini pick. I'd be like, fuck you. He's so passive aggressive.

I'd think I'd double down just to piss her off more. Yeah, I don't think end the relationship, but I think... No, you don't think you end the relationship. Definitely talk to your partner about it. You can get feisty with the mom. Like, if she's going to come for me, I'm going to come for her right back. Yeah, what would you see? Interesting.

I'd be like, I know, I look good, right? Yeah. Yeah. Or I'd respond like, you like? Question mark. I'd be like whatever. Yeah. And then, like, if the boyfriend breaks up with me because the mom is crazy,

then that's not my problem. Yeah, that's also kind of dark as well. I'm 29 and I've been with my boyfriend for nine years. We own a house together and for some reason I had a feeling he would propose, but it hasn't happened yet. He's been talking a lot about next steps and for him that would be kids. I've mentioned marriage a few times lately and found that he hasn't even considered ring shopping.

Do you think that's a me problem, the fact that I would like to be married first or do you think that's reasonable before kids? Personally, for me, I think it's reasonable before kids. However, there are a lot of people in this world that do not believe in the institution of marriage. Yeah. Yeah, no, for sure. I mean, I think if you're like raising a child to have that financial security structure. Agreed. Supporting the child. I think you do it for the child. Even if you don't want to, I think it's good for a child to have that. What I will say is I don't think it's like, um, with bad intent that he's saying he doesn't want to get married. I don't think he

doesn't, I don't think he's not considering marriage because he doesn't want to marry you if he's talking about wanting to have kids with you. Well, that's that way I was confused. Do you know what I mean? Like I think maybe this is a larger conversation of like, hey, do you like not want to do marriage as a whole? And like that having that conversation and if you cannot get on the same page with that, then maybe you do have to go your separate ways if marriage is so important to you. But if he's more important to you as a person, then maybe you can work through it. I think look up and research the impacts studies.

I'm sure there's loads of studies. about kids being raised in a family with two parents. Oh, you want to convince him. Versus kids that are in a marriage. Okay. So look up a study. And so just whatever's best for the child. If you're going to bring a child into the world,

everything needs to be about the child. Every child should be a narcissist. What? Every child should be a narcissist, i.e. only think about themselves. Only develop themselves. because that's when you like then you know who you are

and then you like go into the world okay love that energy so I think whatever is best for the child love that energy basically my roommate keeps oh my god basically my roommate keeps getting hand jobs from his boyfriend every time we do a movie night hang out etc and pretend we don't notice

like full eye contact and talk I really fucking took me away there basically my roommate keeps getting hand jobs from his boyfriend every time we do a movie night, hang out, etc. And pretend we don't notice. Like full eye contact and talking to us, like it's literally not happening.

One time he asked me to pass him his water during it. How do I address this? That is so crazy. Look at me. Look at me. That is so crazy. I would be like, hey, by the way, like, this is so weird. Like, everybody thinks it's weird.

And like, I'd be like what you guys do. No, I would be like, I need to talk to you. Like, not only. do I think, like, I don't mean to embarrass you because, like, I don't know if you know this, but, like, we all know that you're getting a hand job while we all hang out. And, like, it is just, like, super confusing. And, like, I understand that, like, you might be so in love with each other and so obsessed with each other. And, like, I love that for you. But, like, for us, like, I don't want to see that period. It's weird. It makes me feel weird. And, like,

you need to stop. And if you can't stop, then we cannot hang out as a group anymore. Period. Yeah. That was great advice. That was really good advice. Yeah. Nothing more to add on that. What's late night? What's late night? Late night. Oh, it was when I went on Seth Myers. Is that what that is? Yeah.

That's so cool, man. You should be so proud of yourself. Thomas. You really should. Thank you. I didn't really feel it in the moment. I couldn't feel it. But then my parents were texting me and their friends were texting them and I was getting a bunch of tax from like everyone being like that's so cool.

Yeah, dude. Even I saw it. I was like, what the fuck? This is awesome. Oh, Thomas, thank you. Truly. That's so huge. But it doesn't feel when you're doing it in the moment, it doesn't feel like it's very hard to like rationalize.

that like this is correct. So it's like imposter syndrome I guess. It's imposter syndrome. Yeah. Yeah. And I don't mean to say that. I feel like sometimes saying like I have imposter syndrome like it can toe the line of being very pick me.

But like I really did actually feel that. No, you're riddled with imposter syndrome. Oh, you think so? Oh, absolutely. Okay, cool. Yeah. I had imposter syndrome so much as well. I think it's because I started my career on an app that isn't considered.

considered like traditional. So when I do something of a traditional talent nature, I feel very like this doesn't feel right, even though I want this and I want this to happen and I want it to feel right. It doesn't feel right because I came up on an app that isn't in that field. So like the merging of those two, which is like happening right now, it just makes me feel weird. It makes me very happy. It's what I've always wanted. But I do like feel like, oh my God.

I'm I supposed to be here. Yeah, I can't get that as 100%. I mean, you're a very nation. You've developed and created something very unique. I mean, I can look at chat shows and, like, see how other actors are and how they conduct themselves. Whereas you're definitely trailblazing. Oh, what?

Yeah, for sure. Oh, Thomas. Dude, it's unbelievable. You were on that show. You want to hang out Wednesday after the show? Yeah. You want to, like, just go, get high, do something. Yeah.

Let's do it. Yeah. Oh, my God. you are the best. Has anyone ever, like, told you that? No. You are the best. My grand does, and then she tells me I'm going to hell in the same sentence.

Oh, love her. I would love her. I would have disorganized attachment because of her. All my, all of, what did you say? Sorry? But disorganized attachment because of, Oh, I, the attachment theories. Jenny, Alex, was trying to explain to me the attachment theories the other day.

Like, like, anxious attachment, like, all that stuff. And I'm very, I'm going to, like, look into it because I'm very interested. It was really, really interesting. It'll get you closer to you because then you'll see what you are. Yeah. Kind of fun, honestly. No, I know. Psychology is like interesting. Yeah. All of my... Interesting. All of my friends are going abroad next semester except for me. None of them told me they were signing up for it and they made a separate group chat to talk about plenty and everything. Oh my God, girl. Yeah. Wow. It's not like I could afford it anyways, but I'm going to be living alone and all

my roommates and friends are going to be living together in Rome. Just realize that they're not your people. and that they're treating you disrespectfully and you don't allow yourself to be treated with the disrespect. And then you just part ways. I was supposed to go abroad and then COVID happened. And I'm so grateful that... Abroad to work? No, like, in the States, when people...

Like, when people go to college in the States, there's this thing, like, junior year, a lot of people will take a semester and go to Europe abroad. And I was supposed to go to London. And then COVID happened. And I'm so great... I'm not grateful that COVID happened, but I'm grateful that it led me to not going abroad

because then I had an incredible job that led me to meet Louise that led me here to talk to you now. So you really like, I've been doing this five years. I've been doing this for three years. I would say like almost three on the dot. I'm like, what do you should jump in the ground? I know, it's crazy, but it feels so long.

You're on a fucking broad, on your own Broadway. I know, I know, I know. I really need to, but back to happy and sad by Casey and Musgraves. Sometimes when I feel, Casey, what did I just? just say. Sometimes I feel like if I recognize the good, the bad will come. So like sometimes that's... The bad's going to come.

I don't want it to. But by denying the goods doesn't mean that it's going to then the bad's not going to come. You can still enjoy the good. Just don't attach yourself to the good. I can't. I can't. I can't. Are you on meds?

No. Wow. Good for you. Oh, I've been, though. I keep getting... You have? I have been. Which ones?

Okay, that's okay. That's okay. That's okay. I keep getting nauseous every time I hook up with my girlfriend. Like, it feels like I'm car sick every time we're intimate. We've been together for three months

and it's never not happened. Okay. Is this a girl? I don't know. I'm good at hiding it, but what does this mean? Is it a sex thing, a her thing? Or do I play for a different team,

if you know what I mean? Yeah. If it's a guy saying this, then maybe, yeah. Honestly, if it's a guy saying this, Annie's watching your show and writing into your show, I think he might be gay. Which is fun.

That was fucking funny. You should go into comedy next. I caught my brother watching gay porn. He is super homophobic. I know exactly what this means. And he didn't know I saw him. I don't want to out him and bring it up in an uncomfortable way, but I can't stay silent when he says nasty.

shit all the time. How do I be the bigger person handling this? You go to him privately and you say... Yeah, I know what you do. You say, you're gay? And that's okay. And that's okay. Do you know that reference? No. Your bye. You are gay. No, you've never seen your buy? No. Oh my God. What is it? The best video. Only,

it's only the best video of all time. I want to see it. You've got, you've all seen your buy, right? Alex, have you seen your buy? It's in the, it's in the, It's like the what would you do shows? Oh, I love those shows. And somebody's like, you're gay. And he's like, but I like guys and girls. This woman taps him on the shoulder and goes, you're bye.

And it's just like, it's just like one. Sometimes if I'm... Look, look, look. You're bye. So awesome. Sometimes if I need to cry, I'll watch what will you do videos and watch people like sticking up for each other. That makes me cry the most is watching strangers sicking up and helping other strangers. Once last time you cried?

Last night. Oh, really? Yeah. I'm sorry. No, it's good. I wish I could cry. It's good. I wish I could cry.

I love like I'm like access and tears these days. What made you cry if you feel comfortable sharing? That's okay. My relationship is just a total double standard these days and I'm getting sick of it. I asked my boyfriend about his celebrity crush and he told me his current was Josh O'Connor, who looks nothing like me. And so I responded with my celebrity crush, and he got so immediately jealous and genuinely upset

for the rest of the day. That, like, just happened. But stuff like this happens every other day. At first, it was cute, but it honestly is this toxic behavior. Mm-hmm. Yes. But, like, I've been there. I've been there, brother.

It's the worst thing, and it's just insecurity. Okay. That's all it is. Okay. And so I don't know if you can get through it together. But I think if he's been honest, there's hope to get through it. But is he being honest in the fact that he recognizes it's a double standard?

The most, my number one pet peeve is when someone, like, can't realize how hypocritical they're being. I think, yeah, no, that's just insecurity. I've been there. I actually have been there. Mm-hmm. A bunch of times, and it's the worst, it's, like, the worst feeling because you're also, like, hate it. But it's, like, some weird abandonment thing. Yeah.

It's like a threat to your, like, existence. So I think that's, yeah, it's sad. Okay, last one. Are you ready? Yeah. I'm tired of feeling like I could constable. do better. No matter what the case is, school, boys, family, etc., I have this thing in my head that tells me I can always do more. I don't know if this is relatable, but if you or amazing guest,

I just need five seconds. I need to restart, actually. I miss that. It's okay. Just don't worry about it. I'm tired of feeling like I could constantly do better. No matter what the case is, school, boys, family, et cetera, I have this thing in my head that tells me I can always do more. I don't know if this is relatable, but if you or amazing guest ever feel. like this, how do you guys navigate it and remind yourself to slow down? My mom actually bought me a gratitude journal. Okay, do you

do that? I do, I haven't been doing it the last few weeks just with everything with Paradise coming out. So I've been distracted, but... See that plug? Period. Well, it is the best show on television. And I meant that. I mean that. It is good, isn't it? No, I didn't want to leave? I wanted to keep watching. Because I have the screeners.

And I'm like, all I can think about. And the reason I'm in such a... Half the reason I'm in such a good mood is because I'm so fucking pumped to go home and watch Paradise. It just gives bad. I've never felt... I haven't felt this way about a show in so long. Like, I'm just gonna plug it for five seconds.

Like, really and truly, like, I literally think it is one of the... It is so hard to have a show... Be not soapy, but have those soapy plot twists and still be so grounded in these, like, incredible themes. And, like, I think it does such a good job of doing that. Like, oh, my God, in the last episode, episode four, when she, when Shailene Woodley and Sterling are walking down the road and she's like, do not look at those people and do not

say hi. But he has that hope and that faith in humanity. So he says hi. And then he's able to go back later and have them help her give birth and, like, have that, like, hope. Oh, my, I just think it's so moving. I think it is, like, really and truly the best show on television. I'm so, like, so happy you're in it.

I'm so happy for you. I think it is seriously the best show on TV. Oh, thank you, boss. It is so good. Thank you, man. Yeah. Anyway, back to this girl. What was the fucking, what was the question?

How do you remind yourself to slow down? That was it. So my mom actually bought me a little stocking filler. My mom still gives me stocking. Oh, that's cute. You're so Scottish. Yeah. And she put a little book and three things.

So at the start of the day, I'll meditate, and then I'll read this. How do you meditate? Tate. It's called Transcendental Meditation. Okay. And what is that? You have a mantra

and you just sit down and you do the mantra for 20 minutes. Okay, can we try to do it for like two minutes? Yeah. Okay, so let's say the mantra is O-ing. Okay. And so you just sit. Okay.

And this is all in my brain. Okay. So I don't say it out loud. I'll say out loud, but this is happening your brain. You go O-in. Oh, and then you'll find like some silence. and it will maybe be like half a second and then your brain will start up again

and then you just keep going back to this mantra and like sometimes I'll be sitting there for 20 minutes and my brain's just going mental but you just go back to the mantra every time so you're not forcing anything and you're also trying not to achieve a certain state you're just trying to be honest with where you are okay

and when it's like the truth of where you are then you can then you can move from the knowing but if you try and like superficially develop a state you then deny because I always feel like negative emotions are always trying to tell you something and so if you try and get away from them you're never going to learn what you need to learn okay well then that is what we prescribe well Thomas is that hey oh my god are you having the best time ever I feel like we're just warming up we kind of did that we kind of did that how amazing was that like genuinely

That was so awesome. Thomas, what did we learn today? What did we learn today? What did you learn today? I learned. You know, I know what my real takeaway from this was? I need to stop being scared, like letting the idea that bad things are going to happen stop me from being happy because they are going to happen.

And I need, I need to find peace in the fact that they are going to happen. and I need to be able to allow myself to experience joy in some capacity. That is what I took away from this. Yeah. And also, to add to that, the more that you ruminate on something bad happening, the likelihood it's going to happen. No, I know. It literally made, wait, I can't.

So, like, if you're, like, constantly thinking that's what you're generating energetically. And so you're attracting that. I know, I know, I know, I know. What did you learn today? I learned that, I guess I kind of reaffirmed. affirmed a lot of things, like reminding myself. It's so nice being able to, like, speak with you. And just, yeah, reaffirmed it.

And it's a journey, you know. I'm not sitting from any place of, I guess that's what I learned. I'm speaking as if I've, like, made it. But you never do. And I'm very much in a process as well. And people are just at different stages in their process. But I feel like you're not speaking from, like, oh, I made it professionally.

You're speaking of, like, I feel like I'm at a good place in my life personally and mentally. Because then everything else takes care of itself. Right. You don't even have to think about it. Right. It's almost like a cheat sheet. You, like, fall in love with who you are. You accept the good and the bad of who you are, and you can stand with that.

Everything else will just take care of itself. Instead of individually trying to fix everything. I love that. Yeah. Wow. I love you. And I love you. Oh, I love you.

Oh, so hard. Thank you so much. Will you give a little bye pussies? Bye pussies.