Therapuss with Jake Shane - Session 36: Junday

Episode Date: August 4, 2024

Please rise for the Junday national anthem... Tell Me What's Wrong at ⁠ passthatpuss.com Follow Me! Instagram | @passthatpuss TikTok | @octopusslover8 Follow Julia! @juliamervis Listen to "THERAPUSS" Spotify: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/1BHDdC0OVuHqZ706FobfOF ⁠⁠Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/therapuss-with-jake-shane/id1723626781⁠⁠ Amazon Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/93117357-1f23-46e1-8f26-88f5182a68b8/therapuss-with-jake-shane⁠⁠ YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/@octopusslover8 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Please rise for the Junday National Anthem. Happy Junday to you. I hope you're not blue on this Junday with you. Happy Junday to you. That was amazing. Well, Pussies, happy Junday. Happy Junday. Happy Junday to you.

This is our first Junday episode together. So how do we want to tell the pussies? I mean, for those who don't know, do you want to explain what Junday is? So Junday stands for. Jake, Julia, John Sunday because we usually spend every Sunday together and then John, who's my boyfriend, started spending every Sunday with us.

So then, like, we were just like, wow, like, it's Junday. But we would always go to like the same restaurant, like, do the same things, like hang out all Sunday. And then it was just like, oh, like it's literally Junday. Kennedy was like, it's Junday. Yeah, Ken was like, oh, like. For John.

But like Julian and I were like, wait, like, what about us? We're also Jake and Julia. Like, and then John, like, I'm sorry. I'm not. just going to say it. Yeah, say it. Doesn't like to be a part of like our whole schick sometimes.

Yeah, like he's like, I don't want to be on camera. So. And we're like, you know what? Like, Junday's a fucking state of mind. Like, it's just like for me, Junday is like Saturday continued. Yeah, like Sundays like, okay, there's no such thing as. Whoa. Sunday like Sunday like.

Yeah, Sunday's not right. There's no such thing as the Junday blues. Like Junday's a happy day. Like, happy Jonday to you. I hope you're not blue. Where's Payton? Okay. So it is Payton's.

birthday today, happy birthday. Thanks. Um, we are just curious, like, well, you know, no, we're not curious. We know. Can you explain to the pussies, like, how you're not allowed to be sat on a Jund. Like we said, there's no such thing as the Junday blues. Of course not. Junday is so important to all of us because all of our best friends, well, I'm not a J. So I guess I'm speaking for myself. All of my best friends are J's, Jake, Julia, John. So Junday is so special. And I'm not, to us because it's a Sunday celebrating all of our Js. And I guess your P's and your K's and your B's and your A's. Do you have any wishes for your birthday pay?

Yeah. You want to share them? Okay. Do you want us to say? Are you not allowed to tell when you like make a wish? Do you want us to say what we love about you? Yeah. Okay.

You go first, Jules. Really? Can you go first? It was your idea. So, well, I guess it was mine. Okay. Okay. I love how witty you are.

Okay, I'm just going to make a statement here. Again. I'm going to make a statement. And I know I'm right about this. Blanket statement. You're a bigger birthday diva than Julia. You are, undeniably. No.

Yes. Yes. We travel. We leave the state every year for your birthday for three years now. This is the first year we haven't left the state. Why are you yelling at me? I don't know. The L.

I'm just saying. You're number one. I feel like Julius always were always like, ugh, like the birthday diva, but like you are the birthday diva. Well, I'm a Leo.

No, I know. I'm just saying like the crew. I've been unfairly unfairly given the title of birthday diva. Like it's you. Well, yeah.

I make my birthday like a big thing, but I feel like I'm pretty good at like handling it myself. Yeah, you do. Mm-hmm. Me and Julia, I can't do. Like, I don't handle.

I am like, oh, it's my birthday and I am making this plan and we are going to celebrate me. But it's like, you guys don't necessarily have to like really lift that many fingers. I thought you were about to say have to come. Oh, I was going to say, whoa. Yeah. Of course you had to come. Because we almost went to Hawaii this year. Our friend group is small.

We almost went. You guys don't come. I'm going to be, woo, alone. We have no friends. Wait, small and mighty. Hello. Oh. Okay, should we sing happy birthday to pay?

Mm-hmm. Please. Okay. I'm ready. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to Payton. Yeah, that was wrong. I've been singing y'all morning.

Happy birthday to my bestie. Yeah, she says to me this morning. She opens her eyes. Happy birthday to my bestie. I was like, keep going. Okay. Happy birthday to you. Wait.

One, two, three. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to Peyton. Happy birthday to you. Yay. Happy birthday, pay, we love you.

I feel like a toddler. I'm like. You are. Okay, Pa, I love you. I love you guys. Is there anything else we need to talk about? We've been fighting about anything recently. We've been fighting a lot.

We haven't really been fighting like that much. We haven't had an in-person fight in a minute. No. The last time we had an in-person fight was when we, like, lived in Orlando. Yeah, those were you guys. Yeah, like we would scream. Scream. We would scream.

Like, they were crazy. Yeah. They stopped, but, like, they were, like, definitely crazy. We have nothing to talk about, huh? We talk about everything. I've been in a really bad mood lately, haven't I? No. I've been actively trying to be better.

You've just been, like, down. Really? Yeah. You're, like, not getting excited by things recently. Why do you think that is? Like, you're just very much, like, I feel like you might be depressed. Are you serious?

Yeah. I'm serious. Dead ass. I'm serious. Why do you say that? Like, I'm just thinking you've been down. Like, I just feel like good things are happening and you're just like stressed. You're upset.

I don't know if this is like something you want to share with them. No, I'll share it. We should share it. It's therapist. So maybe I am depressed. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

Should I switch up my meds? Maybe. Like, it's worth it. I personally think I should be switching mine up. Yeah. Like, I think I need a new question. So should we do it together?

Yeah. Like, I don't know. Are you still on well of ut trend? Yeah. This isn't when I was like planning to like like address today. But like, Oh,

address that. Yeah. Now that we're like on the topic, like I do think you've been on the sadder side. And I think that I've, I've gotten more anxious. You are so much more anxious these days. Right.

Right. I know you're anxious because when you're anxious, like you're in a happy mood. Yeah. And I'm like, Yeah. I'm not like sad. I'm anxious.

Why are you so anxious? I don't know. I just like, I don't know. Do you think you're anxious because I'm sad? Or is that like narcissistic of me? It's super narcissistic. But like it's definitely been like something I've been thinking about.

Okay, cool. Like I'm like, oh, Jake's like sad. You guys, we just thought we'd give you an extra long intro because it's like the first Junday with us. We haven't had a Junday together in ages. I haven't seen you on a Junday in so long. Honestly. So like, thank God we're doing this.

I know. Like it's been a long time since we had Junday together. Okay. Well. Happy Junday, you guys. Enjoy the episode. Love you, Pussy. Hi Pussies.

Welcome back to Therapus. Today we have the most special guest, Bajoules, back in town. Hey, pussies. Hey, Jules. Hey. Like, you're in a bad mood for sure. The worst mood.

I'm in a really bad mood. No, like the worst mood ever. And I'm actually surprisingly in a good mood. Well, do you want to tell them, oh. We can't talk about that. Never mind. No, I'm just feeling like I'm feeling good.

It's summer. Yeah, it's summer. We're both going to Europe. Julia's going to... I'm going to Italy. And actually, I think that's what this episode was supposed to be for, but we didn't really plan for it. Yeah, we didn't decorate at all.

We were supposed to... Well, I wanted... I wanted mozzarella for us. I wanted berets. A beret's a hat, right? Yeah. And I was going to get it back again. Yeah.

Well, anyways, we didn't really prepare, but we're both having travels. We're both having travels. I'm going to France and Italy and you're going to Italy and what? Just Italy. Okay. What should we do for dinner? I'm so hungry. Well, I, okay, so Julia and I were supposed to, we're trying to eat dinner before 8 p.m.

That's obviously not happening tonight. We've been trying to eat before 8 p.m. Because it's just like good. We read that it was good for us. We saw that somewhere. And we're really trying to lose weight. Like desperately. And it's hard.

It's the hardest thing in the world. I'm so hungry. Yeah. So anyways, but we're not going to be able to eat before 8 p.m. I don't think. Where should we get for dinner?

What sounds good to you? I'm really at this stage in... Okay, so me and Julia and Brett, we haven't lived in the same place for longer than a year. I am at the stage in this year. We've done all the restaurants. I'm so out.

I'm so sick. I'm so sick of every restaurant. It's like I'm bored. And I don't want to cook. And I don't want to cook. I'm not cooking. We can't really. We don't really have...

groceries. Oh, well, what are you therapist about, Julia? Okay, let's think. As I said, I'm in like an unusually good mood. Yeah, you're in the best mood ever, which is like, I'm not in a good mood. Yeah, the worst mood. I'm thinking, I'm thinking, well, why don't you start? I'm pissed because I'm so excited to go, you know, when you have something exciting in a few days, like I have a wedding in a few days in Italy. And he invited himself to. That I invited myself to. And I'm really excited to go. And like, tomorrow's the

day before I go. Uh-huh. And so it's like there's only two more sleeps before you go to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And my flight is at 1.30 p.m. So, you know how I love an early flight? Because then I just don't sleep. Right.

I have to sleep. And that's going to be hard. And I had such an exciting day. And like now all the excitement is over. I'll tell you what I'm therapist about. What? I went to the doctor yesterday and I had to get my blood drawn. And like, I'm like pretty.

For what? It was just a checkup. And so I'm like, I'm pretty dramatic about like mostly everything in life, if I'm being honest. Like I'm dramatic about everything. Yeah. But something I'm not dramatic about is like getting, like I don't care. I don't mind like a needle.

Like it just doesn't stress me out that much. Like I never like get squeamish about like shots or like getting my blood drawn. So the nurse takes my blood, but they told me I like had to fast for like five hours before my getting my blood taken. They told you that? Yeah. Because I guess like it gives like the best most accurate. Yeah, is that right? Of your blood?

For what? It was a checkup. And so... And so... And so... They took my blood, and the nurse was like, are you feeling fine? And I was like, yeah, girl.

Like, I feel great. And then all of a sudden, I was like... I kind of feel like really, like, nausea. Like, I'm feeling really lightheaded. She's like, oh, do you want some juice? I'm like, yeah, juice would be great. Like, juice sounds phenomenal. The juice does she give you?

Apple. I would have, like, preferred orange. Yeah. For sure. Continue. The nurse goes to get me the apple juice. Was it like in fridge or was it on the... I don't know.

I didn't see her get it. Was it cold or was it warm? It was cold, I think. Because let me just say. So Peyton's sitting in the chair, she like is so scared of needle. She's so scared. Should we, do you think she'd allow us to play the video of her getting a shot? Yeah, probably.

Okay. Pause. We're going to play the video of Peyton getting the shot. Do you ever play yoga class? Yeah. Peyton, you have to breathe. You're going to sit, breathe. Close your eyes and just breathe.

Payton, you have to breathe. You're going to hyperventilate. In through your nose, out through. You're going to seriously pass out, you're going to hyperventilate. I'm just wiping her. Peyton, you have to calm down. Breathe. Peyton, you have to breathe.

In through your nose, out through your mouth. It calms your breathing. So, Peyton's, like, in the corner like this, but then my blood, like, the bandage is on. Like, she's fine. She's back to, like, coming to, like, back to life. So I'm like, oh, pay, like, I really don't feel okay. I, like, started getting, like, black dots in my, like, vision.

Yeah. And, like, I was sweating, like, profusely. Like, there was sweat, like, pouring out in my face. And I couldn't hear. Like, have you ever fainted? Yes, I've almost fainted. That's what happens when you faint. Like, you stop being able to hear.

Yeah. And, like, I was like, um, so I'm like, Peyton, can you get the nurse? So Peyton's, like, running. And she's, like, nurse, nurse. She thinks she's going to paint. And I'm laying there, like, I hope Peyton, took a picture. If she took a picture, we can put it here. But I was... We definitely would have gotten a photo.

No, I think she did send a photo. I was literally horizontal, like, not okay. The nurse was, like, feeding me the juice. I've never, like, I've never had a scare like that. Your blood sugar was probably low. Yeah, and, and, and I, I, kept saying things to me. I was like, Peyton, I can't hear you. Like, what was she saying? She was, I don't know. I couldn't, I, she was, like, freaking out. So that's probably what I'm pissed about. It was like, and then I had to go back to work. So I was like, all stressed. Because I fainted. Yeah.

Well, we got lunch the other day. Yeah, it was fun. Oh, I think it's also worth noting that my phone's in the other room. Oh. My phone's here. No, I know. I'm just saying my phone's like in the kitchen, which is probably why I'm off because I always need to be near my phone, you know.

Right. But it reminds me of what we did the other day. Which was? The comedy show. Oh my God, you guys. This was so crazy. Okay, so like if there's one thing about me and Julia, it's like we love the phone. I love my phone.

I love my phone. I love my phone. I love my phone. Love my phone. I want to, I want to know if I'm being wanted. And if I'm not being wanted, I want people. Like, I'm gonna, you know, like, I just love my phone. There's no explaining that.

I'm gonna take it to my phone. I just feel, like, it's the first thing I do when I wake up. It's the first thing I do before, like, before bed. I just, like. I literally, like, you, I use my phone genuinely. Like, I, I would, I don't know who I would be without one. I mean, you'd quite literally be no one. I would be no.

I'm just being honest. Like, your phone's given you a lot. Whatever, bitch. Anywho. What does that mean? I'm sorry. No, I'm gonna clip it. Okay.

I, we didn't. We didn't. They, okay, so, anywho, I'm not a person without my phone. Yeah, I'm not either. I'm also just, like, every time my phone buzzes, like, I'm like, oh, what happened? Like, whether or not it's just, like, my friends are being funny or, like, I got an email. Right. Or, like, you know what I mean?

Like, I always want to be, like, I'm anxious. Like, I need to see what's going on. I agreed. And also, like, imagine just like I'm so accustomed to the luxuries a phone provides me like I really can't imagine living without one imagine just like meeting your friend at a restaurant at a set time and like what if something happened and like without you're also like imagine guessing the weather I guess there was the news I never checked the weather I check the weather every day before I get dressed do you really yeah every day I don't because like the weather's so inconsistent sometimes it's 60 degrees sometimes 80 but it always gets hot by the end of the day you don't realize that but it's been really cloudy Jake Yeah. Anywho, we're addicted to our phones. Yeah.

See, I'm addicted to my phone. Yeah, you are. But so basically, when you go to a comedy show, sometimes they put your phone in this, like, bag type thing. I've never heard of this. Okay. Until I experienced it myself. Because me and Jake have been to comedy shows before,

and they're like, please respect the comedian, like, don't take videos. So, like, we don't take videos. Out of respect, but also, like, I just, like, it would be, imagine, like, being called out that. be so embarrassing. So, like, of course, I'm not using my phone. So Jake is like, oh, we're going to go to this comedy show for, like, Netflix is a joke. Like, do you want to come with me?

I was like, uh, of course I do. That sounds like literally so much fun. And he's like, okay, it starts at seven. So I'm like, great. Something about Jake is he doesn't tell me things. Yeah, I don't. Like, I could never be more unprepared for anything when I'm going somewhere with Jake. Right.

Like, he doesn't give me any heads up for, like, anything. So he's like, I'm like, oh, where's like the, We're going to get drinks before the show. So I, like, dressed, like, cute. I wore, like, little, like, kitten heels. And so, because Jake told me, like, the show's in downtown LA. I'm like, oh, it's crypto. Cool.

We'll literally pull up in a car and get out. Like, there's not that much walking. I mean, there's walking, but, like, I was like, I can suffer through that. The comedy show was at Sofi Stadium. Yeah. We walked nearly four miles and heels my feet were bleeding. I offered to switch shoes with you. I know, but it's like, I didn't want you in my shoes.

Yeah, okay. So we get there and I have to pee so bad. Like, do you remember how bad I had to pee? Yeah, you would to pee really bad. And we were meeting up with Connor. And Connor somehow got dropped off at like... Sweet Connor offered to give me a piggyback ride. He did.

I know, but I just like, I was like, wait, no. Like, I would imagine like he couldn't lift me like that. That'd be so embarrassing for me. So we get there and we're going to. I'm addicted to my phone. Nolan, take my phone. So we're checking it. or we finally meet up with Connor.

So there's no line. Like there's no line. Oh yeah. They're like go to the VIP entrance. We're like, oh, that's awesome. Okay, cool. No line. There's one person working with the door.

And then we're like Julia Connor's here in five minutes. Just wait. Somehow in those five minutes, a line that wraps around the block starts to form. And Julia is so mad. And I'm like, I literally like don't know what to do. Like we already done the deed. We're already waiting because I got Conner's tickets. Like I got.

them I thought I was being like I don't know you were being a great friend like I was so for waiting for Connor until the line actually turned into a three hour line so we're waiting in the line and then we're going in and they're like phones on silent and we're like duh phones on silent like a poo and we I don't even think I checked to turn my phone on silent and then they take my phone and put it in a bag and lock it it was the most insane thing in the entire world I looked at Julia I was like whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa And then I was like, hold on, you need to take that out because I actually don't know if I silenced my phone.

Uh-huh. So then I had to take it out and make sure it was silenced and they were so annoyed. And I'm like, I'm sorry. Like, what if my phone starts ringing? I wasn't expecting this. Like Chelsea Handler wouldn't appreciate that. No.

And so we walked in. I went pee and then we sat down. And we're like, okay, you know, like, I'm sorry. Like I'm sorry. No, the loudspeaker is like, okay. And now like, opening up. So the show starts. She's hilarious.

We're like, oh my God, this is so awesome. Like this is the opening. act, it's phenomenal. Yeah, the show starts. And then she introduces another comedian and we're like, but it's not Chelsea. And we're like, oh, okay, there's two openers. And then there's another. And then another.

And then another. Which was so awesome and so great. But like the thing is, we didn't have our phones. We didn't have our phones. And like I all like, I kept trying to open. I was gnawing at it, like pulling at it with tooth and nail like trying to get out of it. Conner said he tried to bite through it. He said it worked once.

And then we lost Connor halfway through the show. And, like, we lost all since it space and time. Me and Kit kept looking at each other. Like, after, we were, like, super in it when, like, every comedian was, like, on stage. And there would be, like, a little break. And we'd be like, well. We didn't know what time it was. And Julie was, like, I was like, I think it's 9 p.m.

Julie was like, no fucking way. It's 9 p.m. It's, like, 7. It's 7.50. I walk out. It's 8.55. I go, oh, my God. I go, I literally go up to a security guard.

Just to make it clear, Chelsea had not caught on stage. No, she had not gone to a stage. I go out to us and go, please, what time is it? And then we leave. The show ends, we leave. It was amazing. It's like 9.30, 10 p.m. We like run outside to open our phones.

And then we realized we have to go back inside for something else. And but like in the meantime, like, well, first of all, Jake sprinted out. Like, without, like, he literally couldn't have ran faster out of the show. And then these, all these people were walking by us being like, all the kids can't wait to get on their phone. Like, yeah, it's been three hours. It's been three hours. Of course I need to check my phone. I need to check my phone.

And we had not one text. To the point where we called. But I kept feeling my phone buzz. I felt my phone buzz. It was like Apple News. Yeah, it was nothing. And then we called Peyton and we go, why didn't you text us? And she was like, well, I figured you couldn't be on your phones.

Because she had been to a comedy show with us before. And I was like, yeah, but girl, like, it's been three hours. Like, you had nothing to say to us. None of our friends texted us. I'm really excited for our Japanese food tonight. Yeah. Let's change the topic. Let's get sashimi.

I guess we can start the Tommy What's Wrongs and just left the guide us. Yeah. I also smoked a little. Should I smoke a little more? Sure. Go for it. Okay.

Keep them busy while I smoke more. Oh, wow. Okay. Let's see. You can talk. Nolan. What's up? Okay.

Do you want to know what I'm like kind of stressed about? What's up? I've been to Italy before. But like for some reason I didn't like really like notice or like realize and like maybe I've just become like more of an. anxious flyer because like now that I work so much like I don't really go anywhere. Same. From New York, it's like 10 hours. That seems wrong, right? I don't know where Italy. I'm pretty stupid. I don't know where Italy is. Me neither. I don't know where anything is, to be completely

honest. So I, one thing about me is I don't read books. I've actually never read a book in my life. Neither. Like in school, like maybe like people get upset about this. Like I actually never read. You didn't do Catcher in the Rye or anything like that? No, well, Spark. Spark notes. Oh, really? Like, I would write full book reports on Spark Notes. Today, I took, because the new Colleen Hoover, like, it ends with us. I can't. I'm so much better now with my phone.

Oh, my God. My mood. You feel less anxious? Oh, my God. Well, I'm talking about how I don't read, and I've, like, never read a book in my life. And so I was saying, like, the new Colleen Hoover movie, the movie based on the, it ends with us. It ends with us. It's coming out.

I was like, I'm going to try to read this book, like, on the plane because Peyton's, like, you literally have to read the book before we see the movie. Like, I'll be so angry. And I was like, okay, fine. Like, with the, like, pre-knowledge that I have never read a book in my life, like, not even in high school or college. What would you do? Spark notes.

Really? Seriously, for, like, 10-page papers, spark notes. Are you serious? I just, like, skim through the book and, like, see where, like, I could find a good quote. A. A. Wait, why haven't you read? Because.

Like, you've never read. I can't do it. Like, I'm, like, I'm incapable. Like, I know what to read, of course, but, like, I just like, I just like. I can't do it. Like I, like, and you know what the worst part about reading is? What? When you see how much is left.

Yeah, it's the worst part. But then that's fun because you get smaller and smaller and smaller. I don't have the patience. So anyways. You know what? That's something you don't have. I don't have patience for anything. At all.

So anyways, I was just telling Nolan how I was like, I'm going to read this book, like, on the plane to Italy. And like, I'm going to try to read on the book because, like, read on the beach. Because Corey was saying, like, it's a really good thing to do on vacation is like, read on the beach. So I was like, oh, I'll do that. That seems like, right. Right.

And so I was like, Peg, I'm going to read. It ends with us on the plane. I was, me and Brett and Payton were texting about something for... Well, do you want to tell the pussies what girly pop vault is? Yeah, basically me and Brat and Peyton are selling our old clothes on our Instagram account at Gurley Pop Vault. We have not done it in like a few months. Yeah, what's up with that?

You guys really like let that one go. We got a bit lazy. A poo. A poo. But you guys should actually do it. I know. So, anyways, I was talking to the middle. And I was like, pay, I'm going to read, I have the book.

She lent it to me months and months and months ago, like, thinking I'd read it. Maybe I'll read too. Continue. And so, no, you should. I think it's good for you, they say. Who? Who say? No, but reading's apparently, like, really good for anxiety. Like, it's great for insomnia.

Oh, like you. Yeah. But, again. Julia has the worst insomnia. It's worse. And one time I didn't sleep for three days. Some crazy shit went down in those three. days.

I don't know. I think, I think like, like it honestly might be too soon to talk about it. Maybe I can talk. I think I can tell it at a live show, but I don't think I can say what went down on those three days and like put it out on the internet. And then like Jake always tries to make me watch that movie awake. Would you know Rodriguez?

Yeah. I know, greenblatt. Love all of the people that are in that movie. But it's like that's true. That's my reality. That was your reality. Should we watch it tonight? No.

You said the trailer looked good. I'm like done watching those type of movies. Anywho. This is like to wrap my story on reading up, I was like, pay, I'm going to read. It ends with us on the plane, but like I need another book for the beach. Like, can I, can I like borrow another one? And she was like, oh my God, she's never been so excited. She's texting in all caps.

She's like, oh, my God, of course I pick it out. Brett chimes in about like 10 minutes later. And it's like, Jules, maybe you should just stick to one. In what world would you read two books? You haven't even read one in 10 years. I've never read a book in since like, biscuit. Okay. You know if you get into books, I'm going to have to get into books.

Of course. Of course. And then you're going to make it your whole personality. Maybe I should get into books. Let's get into books. I just don't have the patience. No, it's like impossible.

But you know what I do have the patience for? Your phone. Should we see if anyone's tried to contact us? Yeah. Well, I don't have my phone anymore. Oh, that's not fair. No, it's okay. Oh, John just texted me.

Oh, well, it's Jonday. We haven't even explained what Junday is. Oh, okay. We need to explain what Junday is. Speaking of John. He would come over every Sunday. And when Kennedy still lived here, rest in fucking peace. Yeah, seriously, Kenney is the biggest loss we've ever suffered.

It's the biggest loss we've ever suffered. And, like, we talk about it often and we're like... It's really, like, it really affected us. It actually changed our lives, like, quite significantly. Yeah. And you know what's crazy? Ken, is that your life is, like, you don't miss us. It's almost better.

Yeah, you don't miss us at all. It's almost better. And, like, well, like... We're like, Ken, when are you coming back? And she's like, ha-ha-ha. She was, like, so much happier. Maybe we're just miserable. people. I don't know.

F. I mean, we tend to do the same thing. We don't do much. We don't do anything. Actually, like, all the time, like, I meet people and I'm like, like, wow, like, that person would be, like, so lovely to, like, do something with. And then, like. No, seriously, because it's like, wait, I won't leave the side of my three friends.

I just. And it's like, it's a curse. I was so, I was so social. I was so social. I was so social for so. much of my life. And Peyton's like itching to get out. Yeah, Peyton's like gnawing at the bed.

She's like, please, guys, can we please go out? And we're like, no. We just, I'm like fine with our company. Like, I don't, like, you know. Yeah. You know what? I'm going to give a shout out. Will and Georgia.

And Charlie. Yeah, those are our best. Those are our best. Yeah. Those are our best. We didn't, yeah, that we, those are. I mean, Georgia's not a new friend, but like, there are new friends. Yeah.

I miss Georgia. Me too. How did we get here? This is a Junday special. It's a Junday special. So, in honor of Junday, we are going to read some tell me what's wrongs. Yeah. Is it wrong to get your best friend's initial tattooed without their knowledge because you were secretly in love with them?

Yes. Yeah, that's probably wrong. That's wrong. However, you are dating their twin brother. What the fuck? However, you are dating their twin brother and have been for a little over a year. I haven't gotten the tattoo yet, but plan to as a reminder of how I felt. Oh, well, when you put it that way?

If I don't plan on breaking up with her brother, what should I do? Simple. Why would you get that tattoo? I'm so sorry. Like, I actually got so lost in that whole thing. I admit that was confusing. No, seriously. She wants to get the initial tattooed of her best guy friend,

but she's dating the best guy friend's twin brother. I see why you don't read. You have bad reading comprehension skills. Oh, it's a girl best friend? Girl. I don't know. You guys need to start putting your tattoos. Okay.

Here's what it is. Okay. I think it's, you know. You know. But can I just say? Please let me explain it to you. Please, let me explain to you. But like overall without even needing, like, I don't need to understand.

I'm just saying like, just get a bracelet with the initial. Like, you don't need a tattoo. Totally. You don't need a tattoo. Well, I don't believe in tattoos. No, like, for myself. For myself. Sorry.

A tattoo would be so wrong on you. It would just be wrong on me. Like, looks great on other people. I actually think tattoos are really cool, but it's like if you're not sure about, like, what you want to, like, just get a necklace. Right. A J. Spend a little money on it.

Or don't. Like you could get it on Amazon. Okay. A life hack, but I'm just, I'm just saying. So let me explain this to you because you're not understanding. Okay. Person. Person one.

Is in love with twin one. Twin one is their best friend. They are dating twin two. Twin two. And they want to maybe break up with twin two. Twin two for twin one. Who is their best friend? Who is their best friend?

Who is their best friend? Oh, I mean, like that sucks for twin two, but like you gotta do what you gotta do. No, but it doesn't. Twin one is their best friend. Oh, so there's no chance. Yeah, this doesn't sound like it's happening. Okay, so I think the top,

I mean, if it's your best friend, like that's sweet. Like, I guess we're a bad example because I'm J2. So like it could be for either of us. Yeah. But like I don't think it's weird. Like I get a tattoo for my best friend for sure. Okay, but okay, fine. I was being judgy.

Fine. No, like, I think it's like a little dramatic. Just like that's never going away. And like, what have you gotten to fight with them? Yeah, and it's like, you know. But they did say it's for a reminder of how I felt. And I think that's weirdly poetic. Yeah.

But like, I don't know if you need a tattoo for it. Yeah, I'm going to go with get some jewelry. And I'm going to prescribe tattoo by Jordan Sparks. Oh, that's a cute one. I like that one. That's a good prescription. Oh, my mom. What are the lyrics again? Just like a tattoo.

I'll always have you. Just like, what are the lyrics, Nolan? I don't know that song. You don't know. Jordan Sparks? You don't know who Jordan Sparks? Tommy, I'm supposed to agree with no air. Should I look them up?

You don't know no air? No, like, you don't know who the Jordan Sparks is the 2007 winner of American Idol? That. That season, that just literally everyone watched, respectfully. Yeah, was David Archelette on that season? Yes. Exactly. Not ringing a bell.

Just what's hard? What's going on? Can you just please look up the lyrics to tattoo by Jordan Sparks? It's all I ask. And if you could say to me the first few words, and I'll catch on. I'll remember starting the lyrics. Hey, hey, hey, oh, oh.

No matter what you say about love, I keep coming back from war, keep my head in the fire. Okay, maybe start from the chorus. I'm not, no melody's picking up here. I can't waste time, so give it a moment. I can't wait. Time so give it a moment

I realize nothing's broken Don't worry about everything I do Okay so we don't know the words With the melody Nothing's broken Be a part of everything I do You're all my heart just like a tattoo It's a really good song Nolai Lolli

I'll always have you I'll always have you All always have you Whoa. You really don't know Jordan Sparks. I'm not young. I know you are young. I forgot.

How old were you when the Twin Towers fell? Not born. I wasn't born yet. He's 20. That was two years before I was born. Such a marker in society. I know. I'm like post-9-11 baby.

So I introduced my seven people. You were one? Yeah, in the city. I was one too. I lived in California. What's your star sign? Libra. You know what?

Well, I guess you've told me a few. two times. Okay, that was a great prescription. Let's read the next one. My best friend of five years slept with my dad. What? My mom has cheated before, but much earlier in the relationship. Both have no idea about each other's flings. They don't know that I know. What should I do?

Girl, how do you know? R-A-B. Rood-ass bitch. Yeah, that missed. Okay, first of all, girl, did the best friend, like, confide in you and be like, oh my God, like, guess who I hooked up with? Like, your dad. Like, that's, first of all, That's insane.

And that friendship immediately. Second of all, how do you know about all this stuff without your parents knowing that you know, you know? Okay. What could we prescribe? Pretty little liars. I feel like I've done that before. This sounds like a plotline straight out of like a soap opera back in the early 2000. So I'm going to prescribe to you general hospital to soap opera because she gets wacky.

Yeah. I mean, that's just crazy, honestly. I don't really know what she should do. I was thinking like, you know that song from. I mean, I know. what she should do. She should confront the dad. That's not how I would go about this thing.

And the friendship with. And then like team mom. Yeah, team mom. Because she's saying like my mom has also cheated before, but much earlier in the relationship. It also wasn't with your friend. Yeah, like I'm sure it was more age appropriate. What a messy, messy mess.

But let me just say I was thinking about that song from Victoria. Did you ever watch Victoria's brother? Yeah, but it doesn't. It doesn't apply. No. This is a dad. That's a great song. BFB, BFB.

You know that one? Friends. Yeah, okay, cool. I was on my mom's laptop the other day and came across her dating website Instant Messenger. Oh, no. I mean, why would you look, though? Why would you look?

That's like a form of torture. I saw her sexting this man and after reading more of the conversation, I saw him ask her to send him $10,000. Oh, girl! No! She's getting internet scams! I'm scared. Oh, I know what we're prescribing.

One sec. It's not over. I am scared that she is getting catfish, but I don't know how to tell her. Bitch, obviously she's getting catfish. What do you mean? You're scared she's getting catfish. That's the reality.

That's literally like, sirens are going off. Oh my God, you have to tell your mom you're getting catfish. If you don't, like, I'm going to delete your account for you. Yeah, no, that's fucked up. What's the show on Netflix? Yep. Tinder swindler. So definitely watch that and like hopefully it'll knock some urgency into you to like get to your mom.

and help her. Yeah, like, show her the Tinder Swindler and be like, this is happening to you. Yeah, like, that's insane. $10,000. And it's like, yeah, I'm curious as to what you responded. Was she like, sure, babe? But I would, yeah, it's not.

Because, like, that's cause for concern on both ends. Yeah, well, I'm actually also curious to see what she's responded. Yeah. Oh, she's going to be like, why the fuck were you going through my dating messages? And honestly, she's right. Yeah, that's, but like, honestly, thank God you were. No, thank God you were, but what were you? Like, she's, she's being catfish.

She's being catfished. My boyfriend and I. are crazy in love, but when we fight, we fight really really help. I'm really not over you, not knowing Jordan Sparks, Noah. So sorry. She's like a legend. Wait, before we call, her and her boyfriend fight really bad. They love each other, but when they fight, they fight really bad. And she's like,

I don't know what to do we work towards our goals. Hello? Hi, this is Jake Shane. Oh, you're kidding right now. And Julia, say hi to Julia. Hey. Hi, Julia. Oh, my God. Wait, we got your. Tell me what's wrong. Do you want to talk about it or no?

Oh my God. Yeah. Why not? Okay. So tell us what's wrong. What isn't? Okay. Well, you wrote in about your BF.

Do you want to talk about that? I totally get if you don't. If you don't, we will cut this entire thing. No, let's do it. You want to talk about it? I kind of go. Okay. What's going on?

You fight a lot. You fight a lot and you're not sure if you should cut it off. Well, you know what? I think Julia has some advice for you. Girl, what's your name? Abby. Abby. Oh, my God.

So nice to meet you. Such a good name. I think that fighting is healthy to like a certain extent, right? But it kind of depends. No, right? Yeah. So, but then like it gets to an extent where it's like, are the fights like outweighing the good, you know?

Yeah. And that's the key. That is, but like, how are you feeling about that? Like, do you think that they're outweighing the good? Sorry, it's me again, it's me again. It's so complex, you know. Yeah, how old are you? I don't think so.

What? How old are you? 24. So are you post-grad? We're 24, too. Well, I'm about to graduate grad school. Oh, congratulations. Thank you.

Well, you know what? Abby, what I will say is we're so young. Like, these aren't, like, decisions you need to figure out, like, right now. Like, you're not about to get married. Also, like, you're about to graduate. Like, this is about you, not your boyfriend. Like, if you guys are fighting. I always say that.

Like, it really is just... Good for you, girl. Yeah, like, it is about you. It's always about you. And it's mostly, it's like... And you're about to graduate. Like, don't even, like, waste your energy on relationship troubles right now. Like, just focus on, like, how proud of yourself you should be that you're graduated and, like, party and enjoy it.

And, like, it's summer, you know? And you should just say, like, if this relationship is like... I'm, like, such a fan. Oh, thanks, Abby. We love you. I'm, wait, what... What are you in school for? Therapy.

Wow, we need that. We, Abby's going to be a therapist, you guys. She's literally in school for therapy. Like, trained and certified. Wow, that's amazing. Congratulations, Abby. We love you, Abby. Don't worry about the boyfriend, at least right now.

Focus on your graduation. And being young. Okay, thank you so much. You guys are so slight. Have a great night. You too. Love you, Abby. I'm a 23-year-old virgin who needs.

advice. Oh my God, literally, like almost was me. Like, is this embarrassing? Every guy that I hook up with just never feels right. We get to the point right before you know the moment and I always freak out to each their own. I think that like there's such a I think there's just like a social construct around that like

entire topic and like you do what feels right for you. Yeah. Like I get that I get feeling bad though. Like it's like annoying. Like I used to feel the same way and I used to be like literally like everyone's part of a club that I'm not part of. Right.

But like you're on your own timeline and like don't like pressure on yourself. Yeah. Like the right guy will come. Yeah. Your time will come. I tell Jake that all the time. Yeah. It doesn't feel good in the moment but I'm sure I'll relate to it later down the line.

And girl when it rains it pours. I'll tell you that much. Uh-huh. And you know what I'm going to prescribe? Two things. One. Okay. Like do you guys know this song?

I don't want to wait. For our lives to be over. that song. And then, just because, like, that's, like, I remember hearing that and be like, I want to have sex.

So, like, I get it. And then, that's crazy thing to think about when you hear that song. But that's the whole point of the song. Yeah, but like, I guess, yeah, it is. Right?

They played it in, like, what? Like, I'm pretty sure I watch it on, like, a teen drama and they were, like, having sex and the song played. Yeah. Maybe. Okay, whatever.

I also prescribe. I have a prescription. Okay. I prescribe my favorite movie in the world Sliding Doors No bitch Clueless Oh clueless I was gonna prescribe that too

She's a virgin who can't drive And let me just tell you That girl is gorgeous She's got it going on But like her time did not come yet It didn't come yet So there you go Coolest, best movie ever

I have a crush on my friend But I'm scared to tell her I'm thinking about telling her before we graduate So we can have a fun summer before college But I'm terrified of rejection Honestly, like as much as I want to tell you, just do it. Like, I kind of get the fear. I get the fear.

But also it's like now you're just, like, you're never going to feel good if you don't get it off your chest. Yeah, maybe just get it off your chest. But like, prepare for the worst, I guess. Okay, so do you know what I'm going to prescribe for that? So, like, I just want to keep things, like, realistic. No, that's okay. Do you know what I'm going to prescribe?

Lavender Hayes by Taylor Swift. Wow, yeah, that's a good one. Because get it off my chest. That's a good one. Yeah. That's a good one. And then I'm also going to prescribe. By Renee Rapp, Strangers to Lovers to Enemies.

Yeah. But I guess they might skip the lovers part. Yeah, and I missed the friend part. Strangers to friendship. Friends to enemies. Yeah, that's a good one. It just changed the lyric in your mind. And then what else should we prescribe?

We can't be friends by Ariana Grande. Wow! Yes! You might not be able to be friends. Yeah, and that's what you have to, if you really just want to go for it and Lavender Hayes get it off your chest, then maybe we can't be friends,

Ariana Grande. Whoa, live chills. Yeah, whoa. That was crazy. That was a sick. That was one of my better prescriptions. I'm trying to think about, like, what else? Like, when you, like, confess and, like, things are weird. I don't know. Like, I feel like there's a lot of things. I've never been confident when it comes to guys, me, because I feel like they will make fun of me if I make the first move. Also me. I'm going to college next fall, though, and have no experience. So how do

I build the confidence to start talking to and making moves on guys? Okay, you aren't even in college yet. Like, you got time. You have time. Like, you'll figure it out. Just trust that you'll figure it out. You'll build it. Also, I will say this. Like, I'm that way and I'm 24 years old. I think that you shouldn't be afraid if guys think that you're weird for, like, making the first move. I actually think guys really, like, love boldness. I think it's cool and, like, be, like, don't be shy.

Like, you know what I mean? Like, stick your neck out a little. I guess that's the wrong expression. I guess you don't agree with me. Sorry, I haven't listened to a single thing you just said. I was tearing off into space. I was just saying, like, I think it's good to be bold and, like. Yeah.

And, like, don't be timid. Yeah. My thing is, like, I feel like it'll come to her. She's already realizing this about herself. Like, what's the show? Okay, hold on. My gears are grinding. Oh, well, why don't we prescribe the show Greek?

I've never seen it, but that's about college. Or look at Rachel Berry and as an example. Because in no world was she ever, ever getting Finn, ever. But that, that bitch was persistent. She got Finn. Yeah, she got Finn. That's the best show of all time. Of all time.

Like, makes. Like, did you have you singly? Seriously? Nolan, what? Oh, you know what? Makes sense Because then you would know No air.

They fucking covered no airingly. Oh yeah, Rachel and Finn. My mom loves Glee. Yeah, because it's the best show of all time. You don't know the song How I'm supposed to breathe with no air. He already went over to be saying the whole thing. You don't know that song.

I recently started liking this guy after we went to prom. Yes, we're in high school, L.O. I asked him on another date and he bailed because he said he was nervous and he's never dated someone before. Should I keep trying or drop him? girl, he does not sound like he's what you need. Yeah. You sound like you know what you want.

Yeah, and he doesn't. And like, you asked him on a date and he said he's nervous. The ball's in his court. Like, onto the next. Yeah, you could find a new date. But we did just tell that girl to be persistent like Rachel Berry. Yeah, but I'm just saying like, okay, like this guy seems like a loser. So find a not loser.

Yeah, it's fine. Like, on to the next. If he's like nervous to date someone, like, I don't know. Like, you're in high school. Okay. If your prom, you're almost at the end of high school. Yeah, you have a long way to go. So many more guys in college.

I prescribe, we'll get back to you on the prescription. Sometimes it takes doctors a minute. All my friends like to drink and get literally obliterated, but I don't drink because I get the worst anxiety. Super valid. So valid. How do I have fun with my friends while they're literally all hammered without being drunk? Honestly, I don't know.

I'm the wrong person to ask because if my friends are getting drunk, I'm not going if I'm not drinking. Unfortunately, to whoever told us what? wrong, we cannot help. We cannot help. But we can't help. And there is help to be had. Like there is a way to do this.

But like it's not going to come from us. I'm sure you can have fun. Just like we are actually like we are the wrong people to ask. Because we also have your same problem. Yeah. Like we're actually also telling you that that's what's wrong with us. We're looking for a prescription ourselves. If you find out, you let us know.

Essentially is what we're trying to say. I'm going to do this one. Okay. Hey. So I met this guy at a bar and approached him. I thought he was cute. Then I went to his place and hooked up with him as one does. But then I realized he's a compulsive liar.

He also won't leave me alone and it's been months. I see him every weekend at the bars. Please help. Love Sarah. And she gave us her number. Sarah seems like my kind of girl. Yeah, Sarah seems like she'd fit right in. Hello. Hi, Sarah.

Hi. Hi, it's Jake Shane. Are you busy? No, it's not. Shut up. No, it really is. Hi! Hey Sarah.

Hey Sarah. Oh my God, what flavor puff? What flavor puff? Grape. Yum. Oh, yeah, grape is good. No, delicious. Ooh, who's the posters?

I love 13 going on 30. Oh my God, lover. Is that the OC? Julia. Sarah, I, Sarah, I think you, like, literally might be in our friend group at this point. Like, you're seeming like our type of girl. I literally watch you guys and I'm like, I could be friends with that. Yeah, no, you could be.

You could be. Give me. I want to talk to Sarah. Okay, so you see this guy at the bars all the time and he won't leave you alone. No, he's psycho. Why is he psycho? Why is he psycho? It's like a long story.

Well, we have time. Okay, so I'll make it really short. So I met him and, like, I was drunk and I was like, I told my best thing. I was like, wait, that guy's really cute. And then she was like, okay, like, I got you. And I was like, okay, so then I maybe made out with him that night. Totally fine. I gave him my number.

Yeah. I went to the bathroom and he had texted me, you're, so beautiful. No. No. But I was like, okay, I was drunk, I was like, okay, like kind of cute. Like, if I was drunk, I'd be like, well, because, like, I was just gonna say, like, if someone did that to me and I was drunk, I'd be like, oh my God, he's obsessed. Yeah, but like, looking back at it, you're like, that's weird. That's creepy. That's a little creepy. No, yeah. And so then I might have gone to his dorm, maybe like two

days later. Three days, he told me he loved me. And I was like, it's so me. Like, it's so me, but I would never say it out loud. Totally. Totally. And he won't. And he won't leave you alone now. He told me he was going back home to Virginia to watch the Super Bowl. A week later, he goes, I'm going back home because my dad had gone in a really bad car accident. Oh, yeah. Sarah, we got to, like, block, block. Sarah, I think we might want to text him to hang out after that.

Sarah, block, block, block report. It's so bad. No, yeah, block. Wait, okay, well, Sarah, we love you literally so much. Wait. I can't believe I'm your favorite guest, Sarah. Oh, yeah, Julia's repeating that part because when you said that, it wasn't into the mic. No, I watched her episode, the birthday one, and the first one, like, and the one with Peyton, like, maybe five times.

Oh, yeah. Well, Sarah, let's hang out. I literally laugh. Wait, where do you go to college? I'm going to a community college for two years because I did kind of bad. But then I'm going to Florida State. Love! That's so fun!

You don't love it. I hope. Okay, well, we love you, Sarah. Bye, Sarah. I love you. I love you. I am obsessed with her. She was funny.

Is there another phone number? Yes, there's one more. I'm just going to keep your phone. Hello. Hi, this is Jake Shane. Oh, my God, you're fucking with me. No, I mean it. I'm literally, oh my God, stop.

I'm with Julia. Say hi to Julia. Hi. Hi, Julia. Oh, my God, I'm literally at work right now. Stop. Do you want to say hi to the pussies? Yes, I do.

Oh, my God, hi, hi, pussies. What's your name? My name is Kennedy. Oh, God. We have a friend named Kennedy. Yes. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Wait, Kennedy. I hope you're having the best person. How do you spell Kennedy? With it, I mean. Okay. Yeah, no, that's a good way to sell it. That's the most, yeah. Our Kennedy spells it weird.

Weirdly. Sorry, Ken. Oh, my God. Well, Kennedy, we love you. We just calling people and wanted to say hi. I was you. Oh, my God. Love you, Kennedy.

Love you. Oh, my God. Yeah. Love her. Yeah. Okay, so. What did we learn today? We learned.

I honestly think I just blocked out for the past two. I learned that I have really bad reading comprehension. Yeah, you do. What did you learn? That I want to leave. I'm so uncomfortable. You've got to get new furniture, really, truly. I've learned that I'm really hungry.

When you have, like, real people on this podcast, like, they're probably, like. Yeah, they get really uncomfortable. They've told me. I want dinner, really, honestly. Yeah, okay. I've learned that I want. dinner. Okay, well, oh my God, we didn't even talk about Europe, really. That was the whole point of this episode. We literally didn't do anything we said we would do. Okay, why don't we do a Junday

post-travel? Okay. Yeah, I guess we're gonna help to. It'll be more fun because then we can talk about like what happened when we traveled. Right. Right? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Do you disagree? No, I completely agree. Okay. Okay. Love you pussies. Bye pussies. Hands up