THESE GUYS! - 2 dumbest guys

Episode Date: May 20, 2025

On this ep the burpy bois wonders how thick is the extension cord that is powering vegas⭐️ 𝗟𝗘𝗔𝗩𝗘 𝗔 𝗥𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗡𝗚 & 𝗥𝗘𝗩𝗜𝗘𝗪📺 𝗪𝗔���𝗖𝗛 𝗢𝗡 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗧𝗨𝗕𝗘 https://youtu.be/xxQ75QbyHHY🧢 𝗡𝗘𝗪 𝗰𝗹𝘂𝗯𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗺𝗲𝗿𝗰𝗵 https://benedictmerch.com/products/clubhouse-hoodie?variant=44118163914809🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦Las Vegas, NV - May 24 https://www.wiseguyscomedy.com/nevada/las-vegas/arts-district/e/benedict-polizziNashville, TN - June 13-14 https://www.etix.com/ticket/e/1051364/2025-benedict-polizzi-nashville-the-lab-at-zaniesBaltimore, MD https://www.magoobysjokehouse.com/shows/317128

And like, how is it, how do they get power? Like, what is that? It's just in the middle of nowhere, man. I'm like, where's it coming from? Two dumbest guys. But you ever think about that? I'm like, how big is the extension cord that you got to, like, where's it coming from? Two dumbest guys for sure.

Not bad for a fat guy. There's beautiful things that act. On another episode of Everybody has the same for you page. everybody has the same for you page also in every commercial and and every dentist office for some reason that song god they love it don't you think i think everybody that works at a dentist's office like the music that plays in the office they turn it on in their car right when they like leave the office like that's always the same music they listen to yes a whole lot of every morning there's a hang on the time they're coming for sure

Hey, chill. Chill, rough, chill. Start crying. Sugar rain in the summer. They're not old? Old guy podcast.

Oh, dude, no, actually this is the one. This is the one. Is I am barely breathing. It's on a son-as-ta-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-jose-ha-ha-j-ha. Joseph? You're like,

oh, God, I got to go get her physical. I'm at a pay for trying to call You're like oh my god I'm so sick of this lobby music You're on Shazam on your phone What is that called again? I've been caught on Shazam Too many times to admit

Hey dude A lot of Tracy Chapman too Give me one reason to stay here And I'll turn my back around Give me where is What is this like a 2000s hits podcast? What is this? Hey, I'd gladly put on a little road trip

I gladly put on a little dentist 2000s Dentist office podcast Lobby music podcast Hey yeah just see what's going on on like episode eight I just want to see what they're talking about Just for a little bit I mean we don't have to listen to the whole thing

Right when they start talking right when they change it. What are you doing? Oh, I don't care. I don't care. A little Santana. Okay. Good push tics. Vegas Saturday. See you there, babe. Wise guys.

The Nashville, Zanis, June 13th and 14th. Baltimore just added September 25th. Good other tickies at benniepillipsy.com. For those coming to the greatest. Spectacle and Racing. The Indianapolis 500 this weekend. Saturday before, day before,

on Saturday, I'm going to be out there because having parties and drinks is my life. Indiana land passed it over to our good buddy DJ Seabuck. He's going to be putting on a little party over there at Tin Roof downtown.

Saturday, the 24th, from 2 to 6. He'll be on the ones and twos. And it'll be a good old time. Clubhouse has been there with me and Benny a handful of years ago. And, you know, Benny's on the road doing his thing. And I got two kids and my wife and other shit going on. And so we'll be there.

And I'm also 31. And so I'm just like, hey, you know what? I've got to pass this off to you, my guy. So he's putting on that party the day before the race. You don't have anything going on. Come on. You shoot a station. I'm about to party.

And come on down to 10 roof and have a grand old time before the race on Sunday. show. Always a heater. Always a heater. Remember to grab your merch, Benedictmerch.com. Not bad for a fat guy. We got TG Clubhouse hoodies,

hats, all that. Benadickmerch.com and email the clubhouse, babe. Rating, reviews. Get your homies to subscribe. Got to grow the clubhouse. Just had a stroke. Got to grow the clubhouse. Got to. We're continuing, too.

We are. Speaking of the 500, I was out on the course with our pal Alexander Rossi this morning. Miss him. Tell him I love him. He actually just had, his wife just had a baby boy. And he's a first time dad. And his kid's name, Ben.

Are you serious? Like Benedict or Benjamin or what's? Benjamin. Yeah. Bro. Dude, I thought there was something there. I was like, I think we're, I think we're best friends, but I don't think you know or I know. How about that?

Yeah. So I asked him about it. And he kind of, you know, you got to tune in and see. It's going to be out Tuesday that you can hear. But, yeah, I was like, oh, wow, a little bitty boy. Another little bitty boy in the world. Yeah. Alexander Rossi, prime time, dude.

Prime time. Remember I put on his racing suit and couldn't get out of it and had a panic attack? I'll never forget those. I'll never forget those three minutes. I felt like three hours. Just me in my room, full fire suit on. Windows open, bro.

I thought I was going to die. It gets sweaty in those. It's like one of those the magicians they do where they get in those straight jackets. Yeah, it's like a straight jacket. Dude, I just, I felt the heat. Couldn't get out.

It felt trapped. But yeah, it was only like two minutes of panic. I don't know how I got it off, honestly. I might have broke it. Yeah. And I was kind of like fire suits, dude. These aren't shit. Whoops.

I kind of, in my head, I kind of thought it was like a spirit Halloween fire suit. That's what I was thinking. But it was like four F1 racing. Like, these are so you don't die. Yeah, those ones, everybody, you see it every year. It goes Ricky Bobby and his friend. bread. I was like, this is that. This is pretty much that. Nope.

No, dude, it's like lined with Teflon. I was like, okay. All right. A little more serious. But fun party, you should go. Lesson learned. Yeah. Always is. Always is a good time. I think we've talked about this before, but screw it. What's your stance on long sleeve shirts

or jackets when it's kind of warm out? Man, you said stance and I almost got in a four point, dude. Split it off. Sorry. Got to get my head in the game. Longsleeve shirts or you see. Yeah, I know, I know.

I know. What's your stance? What's your stance? What's your stance? Oh, I heard stance started firing off the ball. Sorry, coach. You said jackets or long sleeve shirts when it's kind of warm? Yeah.

I always feel uncomfortable in them. And it's not good. It doesn't pay off. Like the look, the look doesn't pay off enough for the, for how hot you actually are deep down inside. You know? Like if it,

I mean, that jacket, I don't know, you think about wearing that on the hottest day ever? Well, it's actually, it's actually looking to be like 68 for a high the whole weekend. And I'm pretty psyched about it.

Oh, dude. That's jacket. I know. So I'm going to be able to accessorize. all my shit, dude. When it comes to the Nd-500 weekend and the week before, I become an absolute

fashionista. I become a diva bitch. I'm like, I want to wear all my shit and I have fits planned out and I got to get them off. You're like a girl on Halloween. You're like, well, there's five days. I have five costumes, five different

costumes. That's you on a race week. You're like, this is for carb day. No, no, this is for carb day. 100%. 100%. It's the time, dude. It's the time to do it. I'm going to be a mermaid on race day.

Yeah. And then me and my two friends are going to get to three blind mice. Three blind mice costume, dude. I can't. How does just every girl's doing it and you're going to do it too? Doesn't that make you like want to die? I don't know. Yeah, you've crept into my head about that too, man.

Like this jacket, I love so much. I love it so much. I want to wear it all the time. but it's a really hot seller right now at the track and so I'm like I'm seeing it I'm seeing ads out here bro yeah so I'm like dude I know with it being a little chilly this weekend I'm gonna be walking in there thinking I'm getting a fit off there's gonna be eight million of them and that pisses me off yeah it's gonna suck but remember you had it first that's what I tell myself you did there there's a little confidence boost there it's like yeah but I had this shit like eight months ago

you just bought it at the track, dude. You're a phony. It was sent to me. Like, there's a different. Like, people see you in it and they're like, oh, yeah. That's like that guy. Thank you. That's really nice, man.

That actually, you're, you're helping my mental state for once. Thanks. It's real. I'm not just saying that. It's real. I know, but I appreciate that.

A bunch of bozos are going to have it on. You're going to have it on your waist in about two hours. Yeah, I got one, but like, I don't feel like wearing it. Yeah, you know. It's just, I hear you that because I'm big. I'm big on long sleeves. I like to wear sleeves. I like long sleeve shirts a lot.

I think you get a nice long sleeve shirt. It's good material. It also feels lightweight. It's breathable. Like you don't got to worry about your skin getting messed up. I'm getting real weird about that in my elder state here. Like, I just want to be protected from the sun. I wear shorts and everything too.

But like, I'll just give me a. good long sleeve. I like it. I think it fits my body well, cool. But I wore it out to the track yesterday, not the jacket, a long sleeve. And I will admit, when it got to be like 4.15 and that sun was just like, just barren down on you. Thinking about cutting the sleeves off

and of your long sleeve. You're like, scissors here, you think? It was like, ooh, I'm a toaster oven in there, bro. Having to like shake my arms out and everything. So it gets a little bit more more air in there. Oh my, that's when you know you're cooked, bro.

What are you doing, babe? No, just chilling. Just loose, just keeping loose. You know, just trying to lose it up. Lose it up, lose it up. Arm circles. Hey, any more pointless stretch and warm up than arm circles? That's what I'm saying.

I think half the stretches, I'm like, hey, this, are you, Hey, that at least, if you pull hard enough, you're feeling something along the back side, you know? Never felt anything. except it's because you're not doing it. You're not doing it hard enough. I'm doing it hard. And then you switch the other side. You always do this.

Well, yeah. You got to loosen it back up. Always this one. See, as a baseball player, that did some stuff for me. That did some stuff for me. For the audio listeners, you should be watching as well,

these guys' clubhouse on YouTube. Ben was doing the arm over the head, pull the elbow down, arm across the body pull the elbow and the tricep across your body to stretch out the I guess it's kind of the what the hell is the oblique

by the way? Is that your back down the side? Kind of like that yeah yeah just made the up but yeah just trying you said what's an oblique my mind went right to the APC guy

the guy that you have to label as muscles in APC it's like a drawing your coach your coach drew it one night or his wife did and it's been like copied and scanned like 80 billion times so it's like it's almost off the paper at this point like how come i can't see this guy's right leg same body that was because it's it's based off of the coach and his legs purple and is about to fall off why is the apc guy we have to label why does he have a butler jersey on

Yeah But Hey arm circles though Seriously somebody Well some coach started that as a joke To see how dumb he can make his team look And then everybody just simulate Just become a part of everybody's routine

Yeah it's nothing dude Reverse them Like all right Pump's up Hey you do that long enough Like while you're riding a stationary bike Then you feel that I mean I guess maybe that's

cardio yeah at that point but dude hey dude dude in my head just breathe I know you were the guy that

I know you were the guy that when you know your boy was trying to max out on bench or squad or something you were over there trying to do a little stupid ass face to get him to laugh just just did that just did that with my room at LA Fitness

last rep last Oh my God. Yeah, every time. Every time. Dude, I can't work out with you. Shut up. Yeah, I had a friend who would, any of the,

any of the, I mean, like, doing any sort of, um, ab workout or routine was just, you're done for. Plank, you're dying,

you look up. He's, you know, you're on the, you're on the, you're on the, uh, the Incline bench that's going backwards.

And you're going down and you come up. And he's, yeah. Be more locked in, dude. Be more like that's on you. Shut up. Damn it, dude. Damn it, research.

You know. No. Not a local podcast at all. Not a high school reminiscent podcast about APC. I've never talked about that before. I've never thought about that class. Every day. Yeah, that's just so insane because you think, you know, you're like,

yeah, once you get to high school, it's over. Gym class or no such thing. Freshman year, got to take PE. Okay, phys ed. Then sophomore through senior year. Oh, shoot, can't do it. APC.

So easy. I was like, okay, we're doing this. APC on game day of game week. You know, the most, I don't even have to go class ever. I'm just going to stretch and look at the play we installed for Franklin Central Chick-fil-A challenge. That was 40 minutes of that. All right, so I go in motion and kick out the edge. Cool.

I mean, can we go to lunch? I don't really think it gets better than that. It doesn't, right? We had it too good. Dude, APC got super real, though, the last week of, school. Like honestly, like maybe the most intensive.

It turned into a reality TV show for like physical competition. You're going up against sophomores, juniors and seniors and like the obstacle course. I was like, dude, I mean, I got to win. Like I got no choice,

bro. It was like the reject athlete Olympics. You got to go through the ladder. Then you got to bear crawl. Then you got to do this old thing. Then you got to go through the ropes. And we time you. And it's like,

okay, like your whole class goes, all right, then you hear, oh my God, dude. Yeah, there's always a sophomore that jumped up. Yeah, you're like, how's that even possible? Who is tan time in that class? He broad jumped 10, 9? It's like a kid that doesn't even play sports. I knew he had like bounce, but I didn't know it was like that.

Yeah, why is it always, my girlfriend? Why was it always where we grew up the kid, who was a freak jumper, like could slam, like put his elbow in the rim, just otherwise a horrible athlete. Didn't play. I was like,

wouldn't play one. It was just like, kid that just like worked at Mike's car wash and played like pickup hoops. Or kid that did play sports, but just like wasn't good at any of them. But he could just jump out of the gym. He could jump over your mom's car.

You're like, why does he play tennis? But also, like, why are you not better at basketball? I know, I hated that. I'm like, match up your skill set, dude. Why can you not catch a football if your life depended on it? I think that's a thing everybody can do, but they're just like, I'm bad at catching. Like, dude, everybody can catch. You just got to, like, focus.

I don't know. I don't know if I agree. There was at least a handful of kids that were like freak athletes and like one thing. Like they, they were an, and straight line, elite top in speed. Could vertical jump and like I said, put their elbow in the rim. Trying to put two and two together though and catch a football. It was like, yeah. Can't, can't walk a chew gum at the same time.

on some Usain Bolt I'm like how's he not good in the NFL Right Like put that guy out wide run a post route Just like Raiders Just figure it out for one game Just sign him

Yeah to the umth degree Darius Hayward Bay Like seventh overall pick 42940 Don't start bro Don't start this Can't run a comeback route And catch the ball

Okay I don't get it either but uh had a had a weird good kind of we had a weird okay career as a stealer Darius Hayward Bay did yeah longer than it probably should have lasted but he like found a real home on special teams as a gunner because hey running in a straight line so fun Gunner not sports podcast though now sports podcast top top five pick ended up as a gunner yeah where do you go Maryland Hell yeah

You see the You see the You see the You see the Steelers Are coming out With a new throwback uniform It's all I see Bro

It's all I see Yeah And I hope it's crazy And I hope it's that one That has like the The yellow on the top of the shoulders You know what I'm talking about?

I'm ready Oh yeah I'm ready for that I don't think they've ever done that I'm like come on Come on. Now's the time. Way back they did. Way back they did.

But it's been, we've been through the cycle. We've had the bumblebees for a lot. We had the 75th anniversary with the gold helmet. And I think the word on the street is they're going to a gold helmet. That's going to be the alternate helmet is a gold one again. But I don't know what the jersey is going to be because I don't think they're going to go back to the black jersey with the gold stripes on the shoulders and the gold numbers. I hope they don't. They said they're going to really.

least in July. So who even knows? Not a sports uniform podcast. Anyways, Vegas this weekend, huh? It's pretty much, it's pretty much just whatever Aaron Rogers wants them to do at this point. Can we get a minute? Can we get a minute? Minut, minute, minute, minute. Minute made. That's our that's our fake sponsor for this. That would be so sick. Oh my God. Minute made by Molinard. Molnard made Hey, are they gonna Are they gonna get Aaron?

Just we'll be done talking Ladies, we're done talking sports after this. Bro, I have no idea. I really don't. I see all these sort of rumblings that they're like,

he's already given them an assurance and that he's just saying like, hey, but I'll wait till the end of May so I can skip some of this early offseason bullshit that I don't want to do. And then you'll have me for June and camp and everything.

I don't know. I'm just excited. I'm tired. I don't. Whatever happens happens. You're not a Steelers fan anymore. I'll be, I'll be there.

I'll be there to support. I'll be there to support. But I've just, I don't have it in me right now. It's the week of the Indy 500. Obviously, if you can't tell. I'm way more in tune with that. The Cubs are in first place.

The Pacers are in the Eastern Conference finals, four games away from the NBA finals. way more pressing things on my mind, Ben. Yeah, yeah. All right. Not a sports fan, though. Yeah, Vegas. What do you do?

What do you? I mean, your shows there. Do you have one show or two shows? Just one show Saturday night. Doing absolutely nothing. No plans. Just go and come back. What am I going to do?

Gamble my life away? Oh my God, Caesar's Palace. Good, babe. I don't know It is amazing Looking around I'll look around and walk around But I won't do it

I don't want to do anything I'll just do all the most normal stuff Just be in like a CVS on the strip of Vegas That's one thing I know is gonna happen I go to Vegas dude I'm walking into a CVS Whoa

Just to see like the You know on the freezer doors now They have the products you can't look at them. You ever see that? You can't open up the door? Well, like, they just cover the front of the freezer frozen food section door

with, like, pictures of, like, you know, de journo pizza and, like, stuff like that. It's really weird. It's in, like, Chicago. It's in some big cities, you know. Ah, you're big time in me. Us sinful folk out here in Indiana, we don't know.

We can still look in the freezer. No, but I don't even get it. I don't get why they do it. honestly. Because I always end up looking in anyway. I'm like, are they in stock?

Yeah, that is weird. But there's always some mods. There's always some mods. Always some mods in the big city that I'm like, wow. I just want to know Vegas is energy bill for like a day. I'm like,

how much is this running you guys? All those big like, like billbole like big poster. I don't even know what they are, bro. Just huge. And I'm like, God,

dang, man. I'll get coffee. I'll walk around. I'll go to Whole Foods. Maybe. Yeah, I think it's, you know, when you think about that kind of stuff

with like that bill, it's like, it's fake, who's paying that? And like, how is it, how do they get power? Like,

what is that? It's just in the middle of nowhere, man. I'm like, where's it coming from? Two dumbest guys. But you ever think about that? I'm like,

how big is the extension cord that you got to, Like, where's it coming from? Two dumbest guys for sure. But like, just a place in the middle of the desert that just has all the power in the world. I'm like... Okay.

Something fishy going on here. Stationable on this power? Oh. I don't know. Dude, you're... Hey, you know, you're a reality TV star. You're pretty famous. Yeah, like, you're good looking.

I don't know, pool party. Come on. Memorial Day weekend? What are we talking about? Oh yeah, true. I guess that could be a thing. That doesn't even, I don't even think about stuff like that. I would go though.

What is it called like stadium swim? Is that in Vegas? Yeah. Yeah, what are we watching though? Dude, watching the draft there? Oh, wow. Come on, come on. Get it together.

Get it together. I don't know. This weekend, they might just have reruns, Florida LSU in 2007 playing up there. I'd go. I'd go. Yeah. Jacob Pester over the B gap.

Stumbling, bumbling into the end zone. 17. I was like pretty sick number for that guy. 18. 18. My bad. My bad. That's a sin.

I can't believe it. Such a big difference between 17 and 18. Honestly. I think you mixed it up because LSU's other number is seven. All their best players get number seven. Oh, I know. I just messed up, bro. You know, you gotta have my back on that one.

But he was like, I was like, what position is he? No, Spockass Parkas. And why is he number eight? Did he, did he come in as a quarterback? Kept the same number. He switched him around. He was such a utility guy. I'm like, how's he going to do it?

How is he going to do this in the league? I don't know. What happened to him? I had a pretty solid run. Got drafted by the Chargers. He's out there on those Philip Rivers squads like Vincent Jackson. and all them Antonio Carmardi

and then he bounced around the AFC West think he went to the Raiders and yeah no he went to the Broncos excuse me you know short shuttle that was the big one

that that and the bench press were the two ones that short shuttle bro yeah let's figure it out three condo drill not not that important shuttle though. This guy can change direction.

Jacob Hester absolutely tore up his APC class. Oh my God, you don't want to know those stats, bro. You think you're strong? Go on rivals.com for one minute. I think that's when I lost all, like, that's when my dream died. I was like, oh my God.

I'm out here struggling to get 225 for 8. Maurice Jones Drew just reping 500. something. I was like Ha ha ha ha ha. Also you see a guy that's like two classes below you. Yeah. Ben Politi,

class of 2009. Fucking. George Johnson, class of 2011. Three times faster and stronger than you. I wasn't even on it. Wasn't even on it. Didn't get a sniff,

dude. Didn't have a profile picture. You might be on there, but no profile picture or anything. No stars, no profile picture. picture. I just registered one day. It's just like that default ghost head.

I'm like, uh, ha ha ha ha ha ha. Uh, cut yourself some slack, man. You're a good athlete. Stadium, swim,

but it's all sports center top 10 plays. Nah. Sometimes those even get old. It's too quick. You need something that you can sit and just have on. Stadium swim. but it's all music videos. I'd be okay with that.

I'd be okay with that. Now we're talking. Now we're talking. Now what kind of music is it? Is it a hodgepodge? Is it mostly hip-hop? Is it party playlist? Is it dentist office?

What is it? It's just like Birdman and Little Wayne. Richer than the riches. Mo money bitches. Yeah, that just playing on a loop. I am on a 24 hour. Champagne diet Dude

Talk about somebody that I wonder Talk about somebody that I do wonder I'm like how How does that Coming out of his body That voice Little Wayne Way worse now

Yeah Now I'm like I don't even know if that what that is Is he okay? Yeah Stadium Swim IMC channel That's what it is A little bit of the killers in there

The game Rich boy Stadium swim Just some Two random dudes playing NFL street Me for seven hours Bobbing in the pool It's pretty sick

Starting to get cold in there No dude There's just like bad bitches coming up to you trying to like sell you like food i'd be like yeah hey do you want like some nachos and a hot dog actually yeah hey could we fire up NBA street volume two next who's on the stick that would be sick it's just it's just you at your friends house who's got next on the street can we go over there we don't have like the wristband or whatever? Okay.

That's a good, that's a good, that's a good bachelor party right there. Just ran out somehow the entire stadium swim, circle pool. Half Tony Hawk Pro Skater, half NFL Street. Two your homies on it and I'm just in the middle. Oh!

All the same workers. Yeah. Yeah, they're just like, they're way too overstaffed. There's like 75 people. people in the pool trying to help you. Bring you drinks, bring you bottles. What's shot?

What a shot? What shot it? Wait. Wait. Ha ha ha. Uh, gonna go to Vegas and not do any of that. Cool. This is from, uh, sorry, let's get into, uh, let's get into the clubhouse.

here in the mailbox. Team that you got stroke meter. Somebody help them. Team these guys are gmail.com. This is from Will says crashing the boards going back to a couple weeks ago. So, fellas. Let me start by apologizing to Joey.

My last email said some typos in it and caused some confusion. Station definitely didn't know about that. Hoping to redeem myself with this one. My wife and I are getting ready for vacation this summer. This got me wondering, what was your guys? his favorite family vacation or trip as a kid, even though this is not a reminiscent podcast. Smack my ass with a platter stuffed shells on Christmas night while your family talks about James Harrison's 100-yard pig six in the Super Bowl.

Will sent from Yahoo Mail from my iPhone. I had to look away, bro. I started praying in my head when he was talking about that. I heard stuff shells in Christmas. Keith fell out. A classic Cabernet. get out of here bro or hey

or an ice cold glass Coca-Cola bottle can't even can't even think about it Christmas was 17 years ago 3445 mark it down Stephen okay

family vacation as a kid favorite one had a couple good ones dude my dad used to hook it up on the way to Michigan a lot of those became like almost clockwork bro

times I was going to Michigan to see my cousins and family. What was the routine? My dad was pretty lit for road trips, so he was always like gas station. Like he was pushing snacks. He was pushing food. We got a Wendy's coming up here on the left. I'd look to my sister. What's up?

Because it was kind of her decision, you know? It's always a girl's decision. No matter what age. Two years old, what do you want? because then, you know, we just don't want you to be in a bad mood pretty much. It's all it is. Hey, just don't be in a bad mood. We'll do whatever you want the whole time.

Right. Here's how it goes. And sorry to bring this up, but here's how it goes with non-divorced parents. So you're on the road. So it's your mom. Yeah. So you're on the road for a road trip. And it's, you know, I think we're going to stop up here to eat here pretty soon.

What do you guys want? I want this. I want this. It doesn't matter what the kids want. you know, right, like you said, the dad, you know, what do you want, honey? The dad. Good with, good with whatever everybody wants. Good with whatever you want.

I can eat. I can get something from anywhere. Mom starts to get pissed because nobody's making any decisions. All the kids want different things. The dad's not chiming in says, I can eat something from anywhere, not being helpful, right? So then the mom just gets pissed and shuts everyone down and it's just like, fine, we'll just go without eating. And then everybody's kept, like, no, but we can. But we can.

But we can. They said that we can do, we can do steak. We said we can. And then dad starts getting pissed because mom. pissed and then everybody's pissed. Everybody's in a bad mood then. It's so weird. How come the girls can't make the decisions,

but it's because like we need something out of the ladies so we can go off that. When, you know, it could have got one thing. The mom can just go, you know, the mom could just say, make the executive decision because it's her choice

like we've established here. McDonald's. Okay. Yep. Or. the dad could have instead of, I'm good with anything, I get some from anywhere, right? He knows that he thinks he's being helpful,

but the mom's going to be more pissed about that. But at the same time, if the dad were to say, you know, I could kind of go, because the dad always has a weird suggestion, right? The dad's not ever going mainstream. You know, he's going like,

he's going like Long John Silver's or like Hardee's or something, you know? It's just like, it's finally like, really? Like for everybody. That's what you're suggesting? Arby's. Arby's 100% 100% dude

Love's a roast beef sandwich I was like I guess I'll get chicken tenders There's gonna get chicken dinners from wherever else we're going But then the mom doesn't want Arby's So then the dad's suggestion is not more helpful Then it pisses her off because then the kids get on About Arby's and then they're starting To join the dad's team then the mom's mad because she

Didn't want Arby's so now she's mad And everyone's still mad because then the dad's getting mad That she asked for the suggestion He gave a suggestion He doesn't like his suggestion and now it's so pissed. I don't know how to solve that riddle. Nobody does.

Nobody does. It happens my entire life. We would eventually just be like, yeah. Or there'd be one thing. Like, it almost be more of a focus than the entire, like, destination of the trip. Would be, what are we eating on the way there? Like, I'd be more hype for that.

One time I wanted Wendy's so bad because me and my sister, like, we're talking about how Wendy's, they're just crabby patties. Have we said that? Have we said that before? I don't think so. The square pad, yeah.

But, like, we were on, like, a SpongeBob kick. Like, it wasn't insane, but we were just watching SpongeBob a lot at that point. And we were like, dude, those look exactly like Wendy's cheese burgers, the crabby patties. So we're, like, on the way to Michigan, we'll get Wendy's. And we were hype for it, bro. So we had, like, a plan. My dad was, like, hype that we were making a decision. He's like, oh, hell, yeah, let's go to Wendy.

Dude, nice. Yeah. So you get like predetermine it a little bit. Yeah. But then you got to think like if there's not a Wendy's, everybody's heartbroken, dude. Right. I mean,

you're always going to find a Wendy's, but it's at that point. Like you just got to, it's got to like hit the right timing on the trip. Like you can't wait two and a half hours. Yeah. Why is Mr. Deeds to like make you,

you're on a road trips and you just start thinking about those fast food places? And you think about Wendy's because of Mr. Deeds when they stop in the helicopter and they get the Wendy's and you're like, damn, that does sound incredible. Does Wendy still have that foil looking paper? Oh, that hits. Oh, my God. There is something different about Wendy's. Hey, hey, hey, being able to pull the foil down, hold the foil. It's a good look.

It's a great look for a commercial. I can never eat stuff with the wrapper on it, but it does, like, like visually, I'm like that guy. Hey, it's folded back perfectly. I love it, especially as the dad now and I'm on the road and I'm probably driving and I'm I'm doing, dude, that's a strong look, strong feel. You're the captain, dude. House and house in that burger, bro.

Drink like this. Yeah, and I'm to the point where it's just like fries are just extra. You know, I got time for fries when I'm driving around the road. Have them. I'll maybe have a few if we have any left in the box. of the bag. I just need my burger. Such a guy food. Burger, such a guy, guy invention.

Burger. Dude, I made, hey, I made some killer smash burgers the other night. Tell me you're married without telling me your marriage. Yeah. I don't get it. I don't really

get it though. Like so it's just It's just a burger, but it's like the... Why? It's just compressed? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's... People are crazy about them.

It's a cool, it's a dope, like, at home recipe. But going out for one, I'm like... Right. Got me one of the tools for it, too. Because you can't... It's tough to just do it with a regular, like, spatula. You got to get one of those fucking compounders, man. Mm-hmm.

Oh, yeah. How much fun do you have doing this? that shit. Did she watch? Did she watch? Awesome. Yeah, that would have gotten a little

too erotica. You know, the kids are out. I'm thinking the same thing. You know, too hot and heavy. If you give somebody a smash burger

compounder, you gotta leave the room. I'm like, you just take care of that. Hey, there's, yeah, there's too much pounding

and smashing and hot and sizzling. Everybody's, you know, you just get too hot and bother. Oh my God. Wait. Wait.

I like saw his forearm veins when he smashed that burger against the girl, we Wee. Wait. Wait, is that one with cheese on it for me?

Wait. Do we have Dr. Pepper? Wait. There's just something so hot about like a dad and a grill and he's like not even a dad but isn't he just like giving up weight? Isn't he just giving off dad?

like dad energy wait and there's a dog next to him by the grill wait he's holding his kid at the same time wait oh man um all right so michigan and food michigan and food Wendy's gas station um favorite road trip okay okay okay okay uh big toss up here so yeah we had the hook up we had bop it and the backseat. Don't know how my dad didn't turn around and shoot us with a gun while we were playing that for two hours. But we were in. And then he hooked up like my dad had that thing that converted the power outlet cigarette lighter thing to a multiple outlet thing. And I was like, is this going to blow the car up?

Yeah. Who knows? So we plugged a little TV. We had a TV that fit like flush between the two seats on the middle console. It was like, bro, I'm 50 cent back here. I'm chilling. I got a TV with movies. Just popping them in.

Happy Gilmar. Big Daddy. Boom. Classics. S&L, like, greatest. Yeah, all that. Just bang. Wow.

Just so fun. Stop. Gas station snacks. Anybody got to go to the bag. Blankets. I don't even know if we're rocking blankets like that. Really? Pillow for sure.

A road trip? Pillow for sure. How about nothing to worry about back there? All you're worrying about is the snacks you have. God, what a life. Mm-hmm. And I love the, anybody have to go to the bathroom? Because that just means we're just going to another gas station party.

Yeah. See, that didn't work out too well for me because, like, my baby sister always messed it up, you know? The timing. Well, we'd have to stop, you know, but then like we couldn't all, we couldn't get anything or anything cool at the gas station because then we'd all have to get something. And then my sister would be like freaking out on something. And then my mom would be pissed and she'd be like, we're going. We're leaving. And then we'd all walk out without anything.

Damn. Tough. Yeah. Got to get on the same page. Like my baby sister would have like a breakdown about like how her seatbelt was fitting. and then, you know, then it just ruins everybody, everything for everybody. So, you know, you know those,

you know those like sister breakdowns. Like, it wasn't like, mom, I don't know why this is happening. I'm bothered by it. It's like, you just got to, you just got to, just got to let it play out.

You're like, I don't know. I have no idea why this is such a big deal that I'm just going to sit back here and not say a word. Yeah. My shit was always, going to Destin, Florida, and we'd all caravan with, like, my uncle and my grandparents

and my family, and we'd all get on the road yet, like, four in the morning. And so it'd be one of those where it's like, you'd wake up, you'd be kind of tired, but then you'd be in the back seat, you'd be like, that shit, that right there, when I first heard about people going to Florida and leaving at, like, 5 p.m. when it was Bethy at dark, I was like, that is so cool. You drive through the night? Yeah, dude. Just watching movies.

Hey, we'd be like passing through Louisville and the sun would like just be starting to creep up. You're like, oh my God. I like what? Oh, my God. We get breakfast food. Yeah. That first stop where you've been up for like five hours, but it's just breakfast. You're stopping at McDonald's for some hash browns.

You're like in Tennessee. Oh, the little, yeah, oh my God, they have like different stuff at this McDonald's in Tennessee. People are wearing, yeah, people are wearing like UT gear and shit. He's like, oh, wow, they do. Yeah, they were here. They have chicken biscuits. That guy that volunteers had just got one. You go to a gas station in Tennessee.

Everything's so volunteered. Falls, falls, vols. Rocky Top. Oh, yeah. That was so cool. Fight song just playing in the gas station. fight song just playing in their dentist office the whole time. It really is like that.

I'm like, are we going to pass the stadium? Let's talk about it. It's a damn good fight song. Every, do it. Rocky Top will always be home, sweet home to me. Oh, Rocky Top. Woo! Rocky Top Tennessee. Bro, Tennessee has it all, except for they just can never do it.

I'm just so, I'm just so. I'm just so like guys like it's your past due like wow please win something right am I tripping so many diehard fans too like even in you're like where did you come from

how are you guys so patient with this this athlete like everything about them they're oh my god dude the they're kind of creeping up into that like the most overhyped school ever I'm like you guys think they're really gonna win I'll bet my life they lose.

They do every year. Dude, no fail. Tennessee. Every time. Nope. Every time. Yeah. Not sports podcast though, so.

It's kind of just bizarre. I'm like, damn, you guys can't even get there? I don't know. Right. You would think of this at this point with all the resources. Yeah. I like the black outlines on the numbers. Throwback to.

Mm-hmm. to like Peyton Manning days. Todd Helden. Big time, big time Adidas school too. Tennessee and Nike, I'm like, not for me.

There's some schools that you're just like, Adidas. Oh yeah, we've talked about this. Tennessee's so Adidas. So Adidas there. Makes me want to cry.

And they should be. From Cody. Best fictional athlete. What up, fellas? Second time writing in. Last time wrote a novel. So trying to condense to just,

to just an essay. How would you begin to have a fictional athlete's top 10 rankings or ones you'd want to see play in real life? On God, there's no doubt in my mind that Pablo Sanchez from backyard baseball has to be top three minimum, which by the way, it's not an app in the app store,

so you're welcome. Slot my ass with a crisp flat floppy disc that your parents had tens or even hundreds of growing up that you never once knew how to make them work. Thanks for making every Tuesday better, Cody. Wow, bro. that really meant a lot at the end nailed that um thanks Cody

yeah paula sanchez always just like dude he's basically hobby bias like that's a hobby bias is him in real life i dude i hate it but i never played backyard baseball that makes sense it was touchy on the on on my computer i had a bad computer so it was like what games will work how are we going to find out we got to buy them then try and you can't rent computer games is the whole thing but I put it on my cousins

and I was like I get it I was cool with it like for a minute I wouldn't to buy like MLB Slugfest for some reason or was that the name of it? So it's so fun Slugfest is so fun

It's just like the OG baseball game right It's not like Not the OG one It's the one that was like Blitz for baseball Where you can like charge the mound And like punch the first basement when you got there That is my life But what's sports are my life

But what's the OG? It'll be the show. Oh, why is it called the show? That is so dirty. Yeah, let's just call it the show. They had a nasty commercial growing up, too. And they'll be the show. I was like,

MVP baseball too with Manny Ramirez and Albert Polis. A lot of people talk about that. It's really good. For some reason, I was like, I kind of want to buy MVP baseball for zero reason at all. Didn't even like baseball. Baseball games were under the radar fun.

Like, you would think, no, but dude, I mean, when you're up there and you get to bat every time, and you're just fucking knocking them out of the park. Like it's fun. Yeah. Never did. But I was like, I'll buy it. Yeah.

I never played that. That's a good. That's a good pick. Pablo Sanchez was sick. Stretch from NBA Street. Unbelievable. Like that guy. I mean, talk about like a 3 and D.

Just freak athlete. Stretch to me is like if Yon. honest, had a consistent outside game. Was that volume two? NBA Street, so like the older dude? Yeah,

the guy with the frail in the front. That was like, yeah. So much fun unlocking those people in NBA Street. Just having the time of my life. Oh my God, I can pick him now.

Also, I don't think he just meant video games, but like, dude, I would put, I would put Julius Campbell and Gary Bertier up against anybody. in anything.

But I guess they're not fictional. I guess they're real people. So I guess I kind of have to evoke that. Yeah, he was nice. The fictionalized version of them, the dramatized version of them of Bertier and Julius Campbell.

I don't know, bro. First and 10 on your own 30. Pitch it to Nelly real quick. Gone. Bray is so fast in that movie. I was like, I don't know if the guards are touching that That was like Peknelly too

He was cool Got the cleats and the cake I was like Cleats he's gonna be even faster I always had like a toothpick in his mouth I was like yeah And then even like Michael Irvin I was like yo he's cold

He's the receiver Just like the guy in the jail yard That was like swole I'm like he's a receiver Also yeah Michael Irvin was like 52 when that movie came out and he was just doing that. What the hell? He was 27.

Could still play in the league, man. Yo, he had the shit on too. I was like, that little basketball scene where you're like, what's his name? Not a movie podcast. One, all their respect. I think he got handled. What was his name in the movie?

Paul Crew. C-R-E-W-E. I'm like, why can't, dude, I love last names how like, they'll sound like

just anything and be spelled different. Spelt of, yep. Yeah, I think he got, he got washed by Michael Urban, but like,

no, it was back and forth. It was back and forth. Was it? I thought, I thought it was kind of like, he was getting beat up. He was.

He was, he took a beating because, uh, he was like, Michael Irvin's character was like, uh, you know, we'll call our own fouls.

And so Michael Irvin, was just like beating the shit out of him and he wouldn't ever call a foul. He was like, did I get you dog? He was like, nah, no, no, you didn't. The feeling in the movie theater while that scene was going on, I was like, but then Michael,

then Paul Crew, clean block, scores the winning basket and Michael Irvin calls a foul. Oh, okay. Yeah, now I remember. Not that I've ever seen that movie in a hotel or anything. Not that I don't watch that

three times a week in 2007. It's still good. When it's on TV, I'm like, keep this on. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Oh, though. We're good. We're going to keep that on. One of those, are you really watching this?

You're like, I mean, yeah. I'm looking up. I'm looking up every like seven seconds. You're just kind of leave it at that, dude. At the end, when the guard almost shoots Paul crew, every time I'm like, That is an order. Crew!

Dude, I thought he was... He's getting the damn ball. I thought he's going to blow his head off. I still do. Every time I see it, I'm like, he's going to shoot him this time. Hey, Calvin Cambridge, like Mike, when he's got the shoes? Oh, never saw it, dang. You didn't see like Mike?

Uh-uh. I wanted to, but I just... Dude, that is... so up your alley. I mean, you'd be all over. Dude, all the NBA players early 2000s? Never saw it. I don't know what happened, bro. I just get, I probably got in trouble that week. Couldn't go to the movies or something. They make another fake LA team, the LA Knights. He's playing for him. Honestly, it'd be a pretty

sick jersey. I'm sure everybody had it in like 2012 at a frat party. All good. All right. From Brian. Got to get to this one. Huntie State University. Oh, a little HSU. What's up, guys? Heard it's 5 o'clock somewhere. Jeez. This guy. I recently wrote in about an NFL draft Humpty Edition.

Now I've come across Humpty State University. We're accepting applications across the country for the best Humthys looking to further their education. Question for the burpee boys. I'm heading on a flight this weekend. What's your go-to airport attire? I try to go casual like joggers in a crewneck hat with AirPods and book I won't read. but I'm always checking out what others are wearing

because I'm a pro shop guy, not a pro shop sports podcast or anything. Let me know your attire and while you're at it, slap my ass like it's 2008 and New Era 5950 hats came out and you're dropping $36 on a hat. That's too big. But you're in the mall and you've got to buy something.

Sent from my Motorola razor. Just did it. Brian just gets the show. Dude, 5950s are like $52 now. All right. Oh, yeah. There's nobody. am more compatible with than a guy that just loves a pro shop.

Like I see a guy in the pro shop. I'm like, I know everything about you. And we could be friends forever if we want, but we're going to go our separate ways and not even look at each other. Every guy in a pro shop. Pro shop and lids. Yeah.

I mean. I see you in lids. We have everything in common. Pretty much. Me and you, same person. What do I wear to an airport? He said joggers, crew neck, book. a hat,

AirPods. It's tough because like the temperature on a plane is always kind of like it's, you don't know, it's random.

So it's like, I've been on a really hot ass plane. I've been on a really cold plane. Unpredictable. Usually cold. So I go, I go sweats. Gotta be kind of comfy.

Um, this is a place where I would go longsleeve probably, but I don't have any good longsleeve shirt. So I don't. I go. sweats like hoodie comfortable comfortable looks good though you know it's not like sloppy sweats hoody it's like yeah it's like kind of kind of better it's it's my upper echelon sweats hoodie

because i just people some people come to the airport just like they rolled out of bed and i'm like can't do that dude can i see one hot person one hot person i yeah it's it's always two spectrums, dude. It's like pajama pants, tank top, what is going on? You look like shit. Or a guy that I'm like, really, man? For the 7 a.m. flight, a jacket and a blakeet? What? Jeans, blazer, hokas, 7 a.m.? I'm like, ah, we're going to assassinate you, dude. All gelled up. Don't let him through. All gelled up, perfect haircut. I'm like, it's 5.20 a.m. dog. Like, what times you're meeting? Yeah, you know, he's going to be whipping out his laptop as soon as he gets on, as soon as he gets on the plane.

On the phone, making deals. I'm like, I think it can wait. Yeah. What are you even talking about? What are you even talking about? Yeah, you're right. It's really bad or it's extremely too good. I'm in the middle.

I am as well. And the big thing for me is the shoes. shoes have to be a little beat up and they have to be worn they have to be very very easily able to take off and put back on i'm not doing the whole i'm not i'm not i'm not i'm not i'm not i'm not doing sandals my god at an airport what the hell is wrong with you but i am uh i they got to be you got to be able to just kick them off slip them off real easy and then once you get your shit you're in line i'm not going and take you're going and take you're them over and untying them and doing the whole thing.

I'm putting those bitches on and I'm going. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I always got to have comfy shoes. Where are you at with shoes on while you're actually sitting on the plane? You see somebody take their shoes off ever? Yeah, I'm not a fan. I mean, I don't really see any place for that. I get so jealous, dude.

I would never do it, but I'm like, just kicking them off, maybe sitting crisscross applesauce on the seat watching a Tom Cruise movie just taking it all in you know I get so jealous of those people sometimes hey do you want cookies? Yeah do you want a sprite? Yeah and they just keep saying yeah to everything I'm like what's your dumbass doing on a plane?

I don't even want to know dead asleep bro really cash out okay so that's when you sleep every time dude I and I've tried to work on planes before and sometimes I like get some stuff done I try to write, but usually I'm just bang out time travel. I'm what I sleep. No better sleep for me than on a plan, dude. One of those points or I'm just like,

feels like I'm back in high school and I'm trying to like keep my head up because I'll be out and then like all of a sudden my head will dip a little bit. I can feel myself. It's so hard, bro. But I don't even care. I'm right back. Yep. It's just constant.

My body just knows. Just go to sleep, you idiot. you know what it is it's it's it's the grown-up sound machine it's yeah like how with babies how you have to have a sound machine on when they're napping and like you you know you put the window down yeah you have the blinds close it's dark for them that you have the sound machine going it puts them to sleep airplane is just grown up sound machine just nursery rhyme the nursery rhyme is just all the things the flight attendants doing those four people did every time I'm like, I've never looked at you while you're doing that.

I'm just saying. Delta has a good one though. Delta has a really good video that describes the whole like flight attendant. The video is good. And I'm like, I could cry. You guys did your thing on that video, Delta. The video is good, but what I will say is that if you're not, if it's a direct flight, yes, got to do it.

See it. Cool. If you're connecting, don't need to do it again, Delta. Hey, second flight, don't need to do it again. I think new people are on that. That's true. Shit. But yeah, I'm like, damn, we gotta do this.

But I'm usually asleep by that point, honestly. Right when I sit down, I'm like, I love how it's just everybody's all in on going to sleep on planes. Like, sorry, I'm out. And nobody's snoring either because everybody's upright. I'm like, this is kind of perfect. Yeah, I mean, they're up right. I think you just don't hear a lot, too. There's so much noise, dude.

It's so loud on a plane. Loud but quiet. Yeah. Perfect to sleep. There you go. All right. Cool. Teen these guys are gmail.com.

Blankets on planes, dude. Just saying? Underrated blankets on plane. Haven't done it because I haven't flown far enough. I'm saying even like 40 minutes. You can ball it up. Use that as a pillow. You know, sometimes like the hand.

Armrest is jamming into your back. Sometimes you put it down. and neck pillow, set. Just had to say it, how to say it's a good, that's a good point. That's a good point.

All right, team these guys at gmail.com, subscribe on YouTube. These guys, Clubhouse on YouTube. Comment the song that you hear in the dentist office every time

or the doctor's office. Every morning there's a hand. Give me one raiser, just stay here. That'd probably be my pick. Indiana land at 10 roof hosted by DJC. I'll be swinging by there on Saturday.

Hope to see you there. Ten Roof Downtown Indy. The Indy 500. Hope you're in town. Hope to see you out of the track. If you see you out of the track, if you see me, say hello. Love to see you. Friday,

Carb Day. If you're out there for Carb Day, I will be between Pagoda Plaza and the Tower Terrace and the Sirius XM tent, 1245 to 245 with Hinch and Rossi and Tim Durham. And we got a bunch of really, really cool, some hopefully, like, hopefully life-changing guest.

Maybe that I get me coming by. So see you there on Carb Day. Come have a beer and say, what's up? So Breffarves are going to be there? Can't say, can't say, but fingers are called. Vegas. See you Saturday. If you're coming out, I can't wait to see you. Stadium swim.

I'll be there after playing SSX tricky on the big screen. There we go. We're partying. Can't wait for the show. Grab your tickies, Bennypilitsy. com. And if you're an indie, Indiana land, baby.

Go see what's up. Subscribe, rate, review, please. Thanks for the emails. Grab the merch. We'll talk to you next week. Thanks. Bye-bye.

Jason Veritech. Oh, that's so gas, dude. That last name. Veritech. Johnny Damon. Shaved. Shave face. These guys.

Yankees giant damage. Bye-bye.