THESE GUYS! - Bury Me In Nike Shox

Episode Date: January 28, 2025

On this ep the burpy boys take a moment of silence for KFC buffets⭐️ 𝗟𝗘𝗔𝗩𝗘 𝗔 𝗥𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗡𝗚 / 𝗥𝗘𝗩𝗜𝗘𝗪 𝗽𝗹𝘀!📺 𝗪𝗔𝗧𝗖𝗛 ����𝗡 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗧𝗨𝗕𝗘 https://youtu.be/xxQ75QbyHHY🧢 𝗡𝗘𝗪 𝗰𝗹𝘂𝗯𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗺𝗲𝗿𝗰𝗵 https://benedictmerch.com/products/clubhouse-hoodie?variant=44118163914809🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦Brea, CA - Jan 29 https://improv.com/brea/comic/benedict+polizzi/Chicago, IL - Feb 12 https://chicago.zanies.com/show/benedict-polizzi-special-event/zanies-comedy-club-chicago/chicago-illinois/Rosemont, IL - Feb 13 https://www.etix.com/ticket/p/70209203/benedict-polizzi-special-event-rosemont-zanies-rosemont?partner_id=100Pottstown, PA - March 8 https://souljoels.com/shop/tickets/benedictpolizzi/Rochester, NY May (linky soon)

You're just like, yeah, my dad wants to be at the IU Tailgate with Josh more than at the Saturday football game too. But I'm his kid. So he has to come fucking act like he wants to watch me on the sideline. They're saying he might get Mr. Football and Mr. Baseball. It's never happened before. Meanwhile, you're just dead as shit in a casket, 62. Newman gloves on. Hey, the girl, the girl's dating Josh.

officially like six days after you're dead. Like, damn. After you're dead. Not bad for a fat guy. Record an audition, recording video on phone. Go ahead and goal. Recording to this computer. That's on.

Recording in progress. Exotated all over my body. Okay. These spies. Can you imagine Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun These spies The only reason we do that is just

Whoa Pizza King Cup What's up? The only reason we do that is just so in the trailer We can just make a bunch of Johnson and Schmiddy puns The spies who aren't like us The spies poke your head around the corner what's your favorite play on Blitz

Hold up a bomb How about Da Bomb? I don't know Is the station know about that one? Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun Where did you get that cup, bro? I'm in.

You've had it since 1993 You took it from Coach Pease TG 119. I don't know where I got this cup God, did I steal it? I had to steal it, obviously. Dude, it's looking Buffalo Wild Wingsy.

I don't really even go there, but it was at the place, it was at the place in Indy, our apartment in Indy, and I just took it from there. This is Pizza Hut. I was going to say Pizza Hut, but I'm pretty sure Pizza Hut is Pepsi. Pizza Hut, Pepsi. I saw an OG Pizza Hut yesterday, dude. The roof with the roof?

They still have them? Am I crazy? No, they don't. They've all been turned into Mexican restaurants. Off-brand Mexican restaurants. That you just take your girlfriend to anyway, and you're like, yeah, I know.

They're always the best ones, though. Or like a restaurant or a store called like the icebox or something for some reason. You don't know what goes on there. Do they sell tuna and like seafood or is it like a bar where you wear a jacket in? That's why I don't know. It used to be a Pizza Hut, now I'm sad about it. Half Pizza Hutts in the world are just liquidated, like, furniture places now. I guess I'll get a new love seat at the old Pizza Hut.

You guys have any cups? That Pizza Hut? Yeah, it's a Bulldog hardware now. Yeah, I got AirPods there. They have, like, everything really cheap. It's like black market stuff. Still wish they had the buffet line and the salad line, but, oh. Bro, one time, this is insane, but one time we were on a, A.U.

Basketball trip. Nothing better than an AAU basketball trip, man. The homies are there. The dads are on edge. Old. We're talking like seventh grade? You already know what I'm talking about eighth grade, bro. Every memory in my head is from eighth grade. Best year in my life. Could never be more on top of the world than that right there. It's probably like April, maybe a final four weekend. Oh, spring. Oh, yeah. And like, you know, you think you're going to play D1 one day. And the March Madness boys are hooping hard. And you're like, I'm going to go to Syracuse. I'm going to go to Syracuse. You're in the warm-up lines and the March Madness song is playing in your head because you're envisioning like, yeah, dude, Nansen Raftery.

Hit it, hit it, hit it. There's nothing better, bro. There's nothing better. I saw the first promo for that yesterday. I think I might have too. And I was like, yeah, got me. Yeah, I know, me too. Hoops, baby.

Cooper Flagg? What's going on? Not a sports podcast. Cooper flag stationed out by Cooper flag Fisher Fisher Yeah Okay A you trip

We're spending the night in a hotel It's weird Like I guess I'll just sleep in the same hotel room As my best friend who's the point guard In both our dads are in there too What is going on? I don't know But our whole team stops

Weirdly at a KFC like in the middle of nowhere, I don't know. Just somebody's dad was like, let's go to KFC and then you can't like debate it. Like Cloverdale, Indiana. Just like, where are we? There's so many tractor supply codes.

You're like, dude. And like, my dad's like, we're going to KFC and I'm like, dude, just you got to, you know what I mean? I don't know. You just got, I'm just rolling with it. We going to KFC, there's a KFC buffet. Wow. There's a KFC buffet.

The sign above it, there's just mashed potatoes, there's chicken, there's macarone, a whole thing in KFC macaron, I've never seen that much in my life. But the sign was like kind of tilted so you could see where it was flipping to, like the next thing you could flip to and the next thing he was going to flip to said dessert buffet. And I was like, we got to stay a little longer, fellas. Desert buffet at KFC. What? Bro, that's why I was like, I don't even know. I know they used to have like the the graham cracker like pudding they used to have like that's a long time ago.

It was probably like even before you. I don't remember that. Bro, yeah. They had like this gram cracker pudding thing. Dude, the OGs in the clubhouse might know about that. I know you got some OGs in the clubhouse. KFC dessert. They got a cake too.

Now KFC is like a punchline, but it used to be kind of a delicacy. Like I remember and just with that. F. These best things belly. Billy option. It was for debt. It was like I vividly remember it. It'd be like 1999, 2000.

And it would be one of those nights, you know, where it was like, hey, Friday night, we're getting out to eat food and we're going to Blockbuster, getting a couple movies. Shut up. Parents were feeling it, right? But hey, hey. But it's dad's turn to pick what we want. You know, what does dad want?

That's what we're having for dinner. Are you like more excited? Are you like, oh, what's he want? Well, I just feel like so many times my dad would be like, you know, I really think you'd go for some KFC. Oh my God. Get some mashed potatoes, the biscuits, oh, chicken, the dark gravy, bucket chicken.

Yeah, because like the kids, we are never picking KFC. You know, it was probably like Pizza Hut or Dominoes or McDonald's or something like that. McDonald's was huge when you were a kid, dude. Couldn't get past it. for a while I went through a little Burger King face. You know, when you're like rebellious 12 and 13 year old, you're like, dude, I don't need that happy meal crap. I get a whopper.

A big kid's meal. BK. Big Kid's meal. That it was like, I think that was what it was called. Yeah. It was like the, it was just like Burger King's version of a happy meal.

Dude, I'm, I'm Team BK. I'm team BK all the way, bro. Hey, and then, you know,

and then Chick-fil-A started creeping its way in and you're like, your family, your family sponsored. By CFA. When CFA started to make its way in, that was like the target. Yeah, that was like going McDonald's to Chick-fil-A was going from Meyer to Target. It's a different world when you get in those drive-through lines. They treat you a little differently.

You're VIP at Chick-fil-A. Yeah. McDonald's, you're to say anybody. I don't know, bro. I never go to Chick-fil-A anymore. Actually, I saw the rankings for fast food, not that I, not that that's all I think about or anything but KFC's number one

and Chick-fil-A's number three swear Well, what was the ranking of? Was it like by the most that are off of interstate exits in the country than yeah, KFC's number one. Just I saw a comedian like going through the rankings and he was like, I don't know why Chick-fil-A's number three

and I was like, I didn't really look too deep into it but I was like KFC number one kind of feels good. Most fast food restaurants attached to a gas station. Yeah, KFC number one. There's a lot of McDonald's. like that too. Dude, when me and Rye, like a couple of years ago when I was doing, when I had my deal with Fox and was doing stand-up on the road and shit, we were on the road a bunch with like baby

Frank. And I swear, dude, there's so many times where we'd be, you know, on the road, just needing to stop, get a quick bite before we either get to the town or we're leaving or whatever. And Ryan would be like, yeah, there's a, there's a McDonald's coming up here. You know, you just want to stop there real quick. I'm like, yeah, I can get like a McChicken and, you know, fry, whatever. And I'd pull in connected to a gas station. I'm like, I'm not doing this, dude.

And Rywood gets so maxed. She's like, it's the same thing. I'm like, it's not the same thing. It's not. You wish it was. But even if it is, it doesn't taste the same. Like, you still have the thought in your head. Like, this came from, like, there's some, they're selling gum and trolley gummy worms

in the same place that are making this McDouble. This doesn't. No. It doesn't feel right, bro. It's not right at all. But that happens so many times. Then I throw on the dad pants and I'm like, I'm turning this car. We're going around.

I'm going to find a different one. She's like, we're not doing that. We're already stopped. Never seen a BK connected to the gas station. Just saying. That's true. You see a McDonald's gas station combo? It's like, I might still get it, but I don't know.

Don't prefer it. That's like seeing the Starbucks inside the grocery store. you're like it's not really I'll do it but I mean it's not the real thing hey push comes to shove yeah I'll get myself some God we're so white

but yeah but yeah no but it's true like it's true hey it's like pizza and sex some is better than none I think about that every single day in my head dude once a day in my head I'm like it's like pizza you know

if it's bad it's still feel good. Dude, speaking of fast food, had a crazy, this past Friday night, me and Rye had first parents night out and like forever. Like literally parents night out only. Need the deeds. Our kids stayed with her folks overnight, which Frank has done that many times, but this was Mirabella's first time doing that, right?

So it was our first time, no kids at all throughout the night. and we just turned the clocks back, man. We had ourselves a Friday night. All of a sudden, it's late, late. We get home and I have Rye throwing the White Castle menu in my face for DoorDash. Let's go. Guess we're doing this. I guess this is going down.

DoorDash, though. And honestly, I mean, we were, we had a late night on Friday night. Like, it was, we were, we were out with some of the boys. You know, we were, we had gone to the Purdue game. It was crazy, dude. We went to the Purdue game, and then we drove back down afterwards to meet up with some friends because we were like leaving Purdue. We're like, we don't have any kids tonight. Like, what the hell else are we going to do?

And then from that, we got the White Castle, man, got the sliders, the chicken ring. Chicken rings. And honestly, for as late as it was in my head the entire time, I was like, you know, one to oblige Rye because I'm like, hey, Mama's night out, whatever she wants goes. Like, she, you know, she deserves to get wild. get food, have drinks, whatever. And in my head the whole time, though, I'm like, it's just going to be total shit, dude. Like, there's no way, yeah, like this late, DoorDash,

it's gonna, you know, the DoorDash is gonna be one of those things where it's like circling your house for some reason. DoorDash sucks. The thought is right there. Drop it off. Food delivery sucks, man. But like, you're so desperate. You're like, I guess I'll take it.

Exactly. And we were and, but you know what? I got to tell you. I had like four sliders at like 2.30 a.m. and they were delicious. Like, they were hot. Kind of fresh. Tasty.

It was like, damn. We just lucked out. Nobody was ordering a White Castle this time. The chicken rings, dude. I've never wanted a fast food menu item more in my life. Never, never really. I've never had the opportunity to go to White Castle, though. I love White Castle.

I do. I'll eat in there. I'll order it. You talk about the rankings of random fast foods by whatever their metric is. Honestly, God, I see this all time about how White Castle's kitchen and all their shit is the cleanest graded. Yeah, it's like it's like the same as a dog's mouth, you know, you're like, there's no way that can be clean. White Castle's kitchen, a dog's mouth, two cleanest things on earth. I'm like, how? How? So true. I forgot about that. Dude, I think about that all the time. I'm like, that's the cleanest thing.

You got a dog's mouth cleaner than your kitchen sink. I'm like, oh my God, there's no way. dude's doing all day is eating shit on the sidewalk. Eating shit and licking his dick. Cleanest mouth ever? Cleanest mouth ever. Clearing any food you'll put in your mouth. Dog's mouth. Football coach.

Treat your locker room. Treat your locker room like your dog's mouth. Right, gentlemen. Spotless. Spotless. Dude, the way that... Bring it up. The way that every noun.

And then, yeah, it was just, it was, it was like your mom. It was, you know, your mom has those times where, like, she just, it falls asleep at the wheel, apparently. And you're just like, oh, you know, she's not an upset mood or anything. Like four days later, then all of a sudden just blows up about the state of the dining room. Oh, whoa. Why were you? You were just fine. Yes.

Like, just like maybe warm us up to it a little bit. That's the same as a coach, dude, walking through the locker room, walks through there every day. you feel like it's just like, yeah, he's got his mind busy with so much other shit. And then all of a sudden just snaps. Yeah. You just beat like a really good team. You're three and oh. I'm feeling, we're feeling kind of good.

Coach just rips your ass. What's going on? It's like a junkyard in here. The three and oh. Has to, hey, has to keep you, has to keep you grounded, you know? Can't get too full yourself. On your toes, boys. Boys, stay alert.

Like all, you know, there's, like with baseball, you know, it's like a baseball manager will get thrown out of a game for a really, like, innocuous, arbitrary call. Right. Just because, like, you know, they'll come back and they'll be like, yeah, I had to do something to just, like, switch it up a bit. I'd do something to, like, get under my guys, you know, like, get a lot of fire under their ass. That's kind of cool. Yeah, just a Tuesday night in June, just like assaulting this umpire, you know. Hell yeah. It's the same with football coaches and the discipline of like keeping your locker space the same

or, you know, picking up the balls. Don't leaving the balls out of the bag on the sideline. Any of that shit. Dude, a big one was, you know those like big pads that you like put on the ground like two yards apart and you like run over them? The bags, dude, the bags. Hey, don't drag them on the ground because there'd be a freshman like, drag in like two of them over to like where the running backs go in that weird corner of the

field where all 97 running backs on the team are don't drag the bags Elliot dude he was always in charge of the bag of balls though like took ownership of that as if his light and it did but his like he was pretty good at it yeah yeah like the sophomore third string quarterback yeah that's just like dying for any chance to get noticed and like be on his P's and Q's and show how dedicated he is. It takes that ball bag. It takes that bag of balls with him to homecoming.

Here to pick up Christine at the door. Coach said this is my responsibility. So I'm just showing them. It's really important to me. And I don't take it for granted. At the dance, two of them. Seven points of prevention. Dude, the ball bag from the.

beginning of the year to the end of the year just dwindles down. At the end of the year, there's three balls in there. One of them's like an orange one from played against sports. You're like, what happened to all the footballs, dude? And why is there, why is there a play school-ass football in here? It's like real rubber. You know those real, like the laces aren't laces. They like, they like chip off. You know, it's like plastic. There's, there's two indentions of laces on there. You're like, Guess we're using this to get ready for a sectional final. Okay.

Hopefully there's weather because this ball is the slickest thing I've ever laid hands on. When there's a, you're about to have a sectional game and it might rain. So your football, so your coach dunks all the footballs in a bucket of water before the game. Hey, has a trash can full of water that before you, the quarterback takes a snap for anything,

just bobbing them in there like their apples on Halloween. Like, dude, it's not going to be like this. Just a soaking wet football every time I get the handoff. Like, I don't really think it's going to be this rainy. We play an underwater, coach? Hey, the time you don't do it, though, monsoon. Do you know? Cancel the game.

Got to move it to Saturday morning. Got to play on turf. At the rich public school doesn't even feel like a game anymore. You're like, is this a scrimmage? that's the weirdest. Four sectionals, you're like... Dude, when I think about like what purgatory might be like

in the afterlife, I feel like it's just a Saturday 10 a.m. varsity football game. Broad daylight with like 18 people in the crowd when it should be... What alternate universe is this? And when can it be over? This is horrible.

It is always at 10 a.m. It's always the worst. It's not the same because like the student section isn't like piped up, you know what I mean? No one's getting up on Saturday morning to go root you on besides like your girlfriend and maybe your two best friends just because they want you to come to their basketball games in January. Girlfriend's not even there, bro.

We like went to the IU tailgate. You're like, dude, I just don't even. That's the thing too. You, there's I should be there too. Yeah, that was supposed to be scheduled. scheduled on Saturday morning. You're like, guys,

like I, this, yes, I want to do this, but I want to do it on Friday night. Lit. I like,

dude, I'm, I'm in the back field thinking about, damn, I got to help my mom with the garage sale and shit. It's first and 10.

Like, I got stuff to do around the house, bro. I got to go do service hours at the pumpkin fest after this. I got to go to Wheeler mission in 10 minutes after the game. Am I going to make it?

Ha! Hot! Touchdown, and he's got a science project due on Monday. Oh, my God, dude. That's just like, I'm like, hey, you want to keep delaying this until midnight on Friday night. I'll stay here all night. Don't care. 2 a.m.

Friday night would probably be a great game. Yeah, honestly put me there in that world. Because then it's, yeah, it's even freak here. Freaks come out on now. All right, cool. I can handle this. 10 a.m. on a.

and not even the same location that you were supposed to play it at in the first place. You pick it up in the second quarter with 648 to go. It's second and eight. What is, I don't even remember what, what happened in the first quarter? That's second and eight. You sure?

I don't know if they had that guy on their team last night. That's a new guy. That's a new guy. Is he from like a community college or something? You got, he was not. That's a new guy. That's a new guy. They have three, six.

six four dudes now. The game's so weird, bro, because it's going to take like 16 minutes to finish the game because it's just a half. Yeah, no one wants to be there. Totally new. Caps aren't calling anything. Totally new game plan.

The coaches stayed up all night. Just eating like Taco Bell and shit, just trying to like game plan for the next day. We got to have a whole new game plan. Because we're down, we're down like 12 and they know all our plays. So we had to like, we just downloaded the Kansas City Chiefs playbook real quick. All these, all this new shit.

New wrinkles, fellas. It's just a bunch of flea flickers. Yeah, it's all you do the next day. The next day, after a rain game and it gets rained out the next day, you run five flea flickers. All the Boise State plays. Yeah. Statue of Liberty, fumble rusky, flea flicker. After those three coaches like, fuck, I'm tapped out. Do the thing it.

Running clock. Thing is, though, they all work, though, because it's 10 a.m. And you're like, what the flea flickers? Hey, the next Saturday morning, like eight of the sophomores don't even show up. No, but you don't even care. The coach doesn't care because it's like, we got to get going, bro. The game starts in like six minutes. They're all, it's a idea I would feel.

It's like, because I don't want to be there either, right? Okay, I get it. But still, I'd be like, how are you just skipping this? This is insane. Oh, yeah. your homie that's just like, I don't care. I'm not going. Like, he doesn't even go.

You got people wearing other people's stuff because they forgot. Like, oh, shit. You know what I mean? Like, oh, I forgot that at home because it's like a weird day. Like, it's just like a. Oh, everything. Yeah, you don't know what day it is because you're like, wait, it's morning time. Is this a Thursday walkthrough on fall break?

No, it's playing. So off schedule. Starting running back forgot his cleat. So he's got to wear yours. So you're just on the sideline wearing Nike shot. Oh, hey, they're blue. Your team colors have nothing to do with blue. You're like, I guess this could maybe pass for cleats if I really needed to go out there.

All your friends are like, bro, bro, hey, all your friends are telling the coach to put you in because you have shocks on. Put them in. You're like, dude, shut up, bro. Hey, they're still unlaced like, because you wear them at school, you know? Oh, yeah. Yeah. They're like laced cool. They're like nodded at the end with the little two things poking out.

You're like, dude, don't, bro. If they put me on kickoff, I'm seriously fucked. The way those bitches would just fly off if that happened. Hey, and there's always like, that's always the game. It's always the game that like your uncle who's never in town is supposed to come to. I hate that. Why is your family always come to the worst games? I'm like, do not come to the.

But so you're like, yeah, you don't have. to like, you know, no, no, it's just your dad and your uncle up in the stands. You're like, I got to talk to Uncle Jeff

after this still. Fuck, dude, you had an out. Go home. Not a drop of sweat on you because you didn't play one, one minute. Pictures after the game,

your hair is still perfect. You just did, you put your helmet on once and took it off once. Hey, the fair, yeah, you're like,

God, dude, Uncle Jeff comes up and like, he doesn't really know what to say because yeah, you didn't do shit. You're wearing them Nike shocks. You're like, hey, I mean, thanks for coming.

Oh, yeah, you know, you, I enjoyed it, you know, it was good. Might come to the semi-state next week or regionals or whatever. Sexual championship next week? Please don't come to the game. Anytime any of my family members want to come to one of my games, please don't come to my game. Oh, my God. For the love of God, just do not go. God, dang.

We want to watch you. Just everything bad will happen. Trust me. God dang. Oh, God. Yeah, dude, there's still like... Your uncle Jeff is how he said. He wants to take you out to eat after the game now.

You're like, all right, let's go. I was thinking Texas Roadhouse. All right, I'll be there. You go. Up on the screen is the IU game. you catch your girl like on TV standing next to the hottest guy in the world from the other

public school across town Jesus Christ is that Josh from Center Grove? God damn it dude all because there was three lightning strikes last night at 845 feet not even dude not even tiny bit of lightning I'd rather

I'd rather have Zeus strike me and kill me than play the next day Hey, kill me on this field so we don't have to play the next day. For the love of God. I'll go down as a hero. Jesus Christ. Hey, dead on the field with Nike shocks on. Hey, still just on the sideline though.

Yeah, you don't even, you're not even playing. You're just, you're standing there and you're with your helmet on because you can't take your fucking helmet off. And so it zaps you because of that. High school football player struck dead on a Friday night game. They look up your. Stats did not play. Who cares? Hey, at your funeral, though,

catch just can't stop talking about, like, how hard you brought it at practice. This team, you know, everybody gives, everybody gives praise to, you know,

Werner and Politi. But this team wouldn't be where it is if little Joey didn't really come out to practice every day and give us our all. Yeah, Okay, shut up. Hey. No more code for I have no idea what the fuck to say.

This kid did nothing and sucked. I'm telling you. This kid just brought it at practice every day. He brought it at practice every day and he brought the ball bag out every day. He really took respect him. No one watched that ball bag. He treated like it was a son. And that's the kind of discipline and reliability that makes this program what it is.

Everybody forgets that you're dead. Everybody forgets that you're dead. Open casket. Nike shocks. Only thing you can see. Buried you in your in your football uniform, knee pads down to your shins, baggy jersey. He gets zapped by lightning. Yeah, so your head and everything's all fucked up, but the bottom of the caskets open.

He's been being buried in the uniform that meant the most to him what he wanted to wear every day since he was seven years old. They mess it up because, like, they had to give your number to another kid. on the team already. So you're number 62 in your casket. They had to hide your face. So they just put a stupid lineman helmet on you. Hey, you're buried like this.

We gave him Milner's helmet because he quit last week. Just looking so stupid in your casket, dude. Mikey Shocks, high white socks, knee pads, gone down way too long. lineman mask cross-eyed they put a visor on it shoulder pads but it's on the outside

because they're like we couldn't have time shoulder pads that like because you're laid down you know when you're on a bus sitting you're like laid down they bunch up so much no a no chin strap

no neck either double chin the way you took care of that bowl bag we'll never forget you and hey your girlfriend's there she's just like Yeah, that's why I'm with Josh now.

Look how much of a fucking idiotity looks like. When's this over? We have to go to freshman orientation. I'm transferring. Still taking a picture, though, by the casket, like, kneeling by it. Doing the IU thing. By the casket, the IU. Your mom's, like, trying to talk to her.

Mom's so sad, and she's just looking at her phone, like, swiping through the picture. to see what looks good. She's already on FaceTune. Like, you look good. Josh, bro. Josh is so hot. Just got your number, bro. Just got your number.

Josh, yeah, you're like, dude, there's no way that kid is our age. He has to be like 20. How does he know everything already? He knows everything, dude. He knows all the, like, all the, like, cool stuff. Like, he knows, like, stuff about college. Like, how does he already live this life be?

for? Yeah, stuff about college. How does he know that? Oh, that's where you go. Every party, how to get into every bar. The guy who, like, he, his fake idea is just pure and he can also get fake IDs for all of your girlfriend and her friends. Like, you're just like, I have no shot.

He has a car in high school that you would have when you're like 28, you know? Yeah. Like next level car. How did you get that car? Oh, I just like, at least it. You know how to do that? No, his dad owns a car dealership, dude. Come on.

Oh, and it's, yeah, his dad's car, car dealership is on the press box of his high school. Has, like, the parties at his house. His house is just called the White House because it's like a giant mansion. With the pillars? The house with the pillars. Yeah. Like, oh, my God. Yeah.

Well, I wouldn't like me either. So I know shit I'm insecure because this isn't fair. Has an offer from IU. He's like, I don't know if I'm going. Hey, I might go to Michigan State for baseball. Right. Two-sport athlete. Like, your dad loves him more than he loves you.

You're just like, yeah, my dad wants to be at the IU Tailgate with Josh more than at the Saturday football game too. But I'm his kid, so he has to come fucking act like he wants to watch me on the sideline. They're saying he might get Mr. Football and Mr. Baseball. It's never happened before. Meanwhile, you're just dead as shit in a casket, 62. Newman gloves on. The girl's dating Josh officially like six days after you're dead. Like, damn.

After you're dead. And he didn't even know you're like showing. Like at least he could have done is like come paid his respects. No chance, dude. R-I-P. Hey, and it's like, it's one of those that, you know, you saw Josh Thomas likes your girls' Facebook status and you're like, I'm done. It's over.

Yeah, like six months ago, he liked, he liked her like picture. You're like, well, that's not good. That's not looking good for me. Hottest guy in the world just like your girlfriend's picture. Uh, yep, it's over. It's over. Good run. Sober.

Jay Thomas 10. It doesn't mean anything. He just like thinks that I'm funny. Okay. And I am funny. Girls that say they're funny. Okay. I'm like the funniest.

So, all right. Tell me you're not funny at all without telling me. I'm like the funniest. I think I'm the funniest person. Trash. I'm literally the funniest. No one's funnier than me.

Okay. You're not funny at all. Tell us. Tell us that. There's so many girls like that. Like, dude, how in the world, how could you have the courage to say that? Yeah, the old, the old athlete competition.

Yeah. No competition. Jay Thomas 10. That was a no-go. Do you follow them, though? Yeah, I've got to follow. I'm out. Yeah.

That's just where you recluse yourself. You see that and you just got to get it. you just got to get out before you just got to get out while you can you know to remove yourself from what's already what do you mean like where we've been together for two years what are you talking about now no no just just trust me it's so bad it's you want to get out so bad you don't know how to do it so you just die oh shit why do you die um well he got struck by lightning like it was really random and like um someone was a girlfriend i think yeah josh thomas liked a couple of her Facebook statuses

and she returned the favor and so he knew that it was just done before you knew it he was just wearing a lineman face mask in a casket with his high school football jersey on oh god I hope yeah they do

they speak the language out there they know wow I can't imagine how it is today you know with everything same exact thing

Snapchat, Instagram pictures, Instagram comments. I mean, there's just, it'd be a lot. When Snapchat would show the top three people

you were talking to, I was like, this is actually like incriminating. You remember that? Oh, yeah. I was like, let me just snap one of my boys like 15 times a day

just to shake some things up because I am a monster. even out the numbers a little bit Yeah let's get all dude I'm just shooting for all dudes in the top three Girl creeps up in your top three I'm like yeah she's my friend I don't really know

That was crazy She's just super cool She's like one of the bros She's just super cool to hang out with She's like my family's friend Our friends Our families are like close So like she's like my cousin I think

She has two older brothers and she grew up with them and her dad and they really like the Packers so she wears a Packers jersey sometimes and it's cool. That's why she's in my top three. She likes Brett Farve, dude. She dressed up as Vince Lombardi

during Spirit Week when it was a historical figure day. Yeah. All the other girls, all the other girls didn't understand but she didn't care and she's cool. Oh,

they're like friends. They call each other like the cheeseheads or something. That's why. he's in his top three yeah the girl that you like at the time oh my god the girl that likes you a lot is just so mad

it's like sorry I don't fucking sit there and watch football like it's the same shit and like he just thinks she's so cool because like she knows who Brett Barb is every time I'm about to like rip that picture of Reggie white down in her It's so annoying. So mad.

Not a reminiscent podcast. No, no. No. Not a high school communication breakdown podcast. Not a sneaky Packers podcast either. Mike McKenzie. Mike McKenzie and Al Harris

corners at the same time for the Packers? How do you do that? Yeah. Hey, take the cool most the two most cornerbacks. guy. Yeah, the most athletic guys that look like they run the 100 meter dash in nine seconds. Put them both that corner. Cover the whole world. I think Charles Woodson was, no, I don't know. That was mad even before he got there. He came later. God damn. Al Harris, Mike. What? How do they lose?

Crazy that Charles Woods, like, I, I feel like his Raiders career doesn't get talked about enough. Yeah. It's just because the Raiders are so, like, who cares well I guess I did go to the Super Bowl with him didn't I against a bucks bucks beat the shit out of him yeah yeah because he was the one that hit Brady in the

the tuck rule game yeah he was a monster on the Raiders now sports podcast but with the Packers clearly had like two distinct who's like Raiders all pro career Packers all pro career I kind of can't remember his Raiders stuff either like he had a good

lot of good plays, but I just feel like it was just like, they were never on TV or something, bro. You play for the Packers. You're just always in the spotlight, I feel like. Yeah. I don't know why I always felt. I was like, man, Charles Woodson. Yeah, now, that's a Raider. Charles Woodson, now, that's a pack. Like, it just made sense. It's like, yeah, that guy's, that that's, that's a lifer right there. Defensive MVP. That was the same year somebody else should have gotten it, though, Revis probably. Yeah, it's like Champ Bailey did that too. That's like a very distinct career with Washington, but then also Denver.

Oh, dude, I remember him on Denver. Like when you said Champ Bailey, I thought Denver, Champ Bailey. Yeah, but you forget that he was with Washington too. Like the OG, OG corner. Like growing up, I was like, if I'm going to pretend that I'm a cornerback, I'm Champ Bailey. And you're playing football in the backyard, playing defense?

I'm Champ Bailey. I do that every time. fake name champ no way no way that's real clubhouse comment the fakeest names that might be real but aren't real champ bailey isn't that crazy yeah when you have like it's you're like that's that's too i mean you literally write that into a script hmm i'm gonna think of a super badass football player what's his name gonna be hey yeah champ bailey the other corner tie law break, man. You can't just tie law.

He sounds like a techen fighter, bro. He's our corner. Tie law. Hey, hey. And it's safety, lawyer Malloy. So hard. Huh? All name.

We need an all name team, dude. Got a pretty good start right there. Nickelback Sean Springs. Just like. No, Nickelback, Dominic Rogers, Carmardi. Bro, if the name Cromarty couldn't get any cooler. Antonio Cremardi, I was like, all right, that's a created player. Okay, his brother, Rogers, oh, you hyphenated it?

You can just do that? Hey, also, on that Cardinals defense, no one's ever been more of a safety who comes down and plays in the box, also as a linebacker, than Adrian Wilson. Oh, yeah, man, he was so good. I was like, what position is he? Right. I swear he's putting his hand in the dirt sometimes too. I was like, is he an edge?

Linebacker and DB. That's the last team, the Steelers beat in the Super Bowl. And so that Cardinals team, I just have like ingrained in my head. All of them. Such a weird. That was an A.U. That was an A Uttarnell talk. It was fire, bro.

Doesn't get talked about enough. That dude was a problem. not sports podcast, but that was an AAU football team. Oh yeah, just Kurt Warner too, our quarterback. Who's their running back, bro? Edron James. Anquam Bolden, just like the best receiver in the NFL is just our second receiver. Second.

Who's their tight end? Hey, you know who their third receiver was? I don't want to know. Oh, Steve Breston. dude. Bro, we're so white guys, but it's so fun to talk about that. Michigan, man. Michigan man.

Steve Breston sneaky, dude. Yes. So, so good. You've won out of your third receiver than Steve Breston. Returning kicks and punts? Line them up in the slot. No one's ran a whip route like Steve Breston. Steve Breston was dirty, bro.

You need four and a half yards and fighting through afterwards. Get the ball to Steve Breston. to throw to him than Kurt Warner. Just dime. Runs out of bounds first down. So many first downs. Steve Russ and most first downs in the history of the NFL. Hey, Kurt Warner too.

Like, when Kurt Warner would take his helmet off and he had all this football gear on, you're like, oh, you're just Dennis Quaid. And this is a football movie and you're just an actor who's playing the quarterback. Put them in every movie. Kurt Warner. They actually made a movie after him. I know. They made a Kurt Warner movie?

God dang, man. He's the coolest guy in the world. Two different teams, two super rules. That's a cool. That's the biggest flex. Yeah, took two different teams of the Super Bowl. He was up for, uh, he was up for these guys live, the 2024. Does my mom have a crush on him award?

Was he? He was up there? Kurt Warner. Okay, yeah. It's really just who do we have a crush on, but we said moms to make it less weird. Kurt Warner, bro. Hey, could still play.

Let's get into some clubhouse, huh? What you say? We say. Clubhouse now about this? All right, team of these guys are gmail.com. Let's start with our man Bailey, our good pal here. He says kings.com, fellas. You guys mentioned browsing online team store.

last pot and I had to relate. And fourth grade during indoor recess, what would I do? Immediately go to the bag of the classroom, load up the computer, go to kings.com, and browse for 35 minutes. The Mike Bibby Gold Alternate that I already owned, maybe some shorts. Did you guys have a go-to team store? Slat my ass, just soft enough to where a station doesn't have to know about it. Fair.

Very fair. Looking at a jersey that you already had is so funny. Like showing your friends, like. but also you're looking at you're like is that one better yeah but it's yeah it's the same player but it's a different version you know I remember my mom used to get on me

you already have him I'd be like yeah but it's the white the white one the white one so much better it's always the one I don't have yeah go to team store that we had I always just went NFL dot com when I was a kid I go to NFLcom every day

I think. Every day. I got home from school, NFL.com. And I just look at all the logos across the top and just pick a team and go to it and be like, bangles.

I would go to the roster and see like if there's anybody from Indiana. You know, randomly it was rails. I'm like, oh, that dude's from South Bend.

Maybe I could make it. Oh, man. I wouldn't even go that deep. I would just look at like the homepage of each team's website and be like, wow, they really got it going on. The Rams website?

Like bring it up to your friends. Big one for me was finish line. Not so much team story. Yeah, because it's like I either, I had my teams, right? And I knew or like it would be very specific. I had like a player that was like, I love this dude.

So it wasn't a lot of browsing because I just knew. But on finish line, you'd go there, all the shoes where you could start doing the custom ID shit, making your own on there. That's the play. The different Jordan, you know,

now when finish line is like, oh, it's not just shoes. Now I can look at all the Jordan shorts. Yeah, I want those red colorways for Christmas. Sign me up. I still go to Nike.com and just search Jordan shorts. Like, never seen these. It's crazy. It's crazy. But during school, I wouldn't go team stores. I would just go to Nike ID. You Nike ID some shoes like on the back half of like a computer class. You know, you're done with whatever you had to. Now you just have free time on the computer. You're like in the corner of the room. I always had the best seat in computer.

class. Cushing seats too. Yeah, you're spinning around, flirting and shit. Hey, hey, yeah, kicking, uh, pressing down on the girl next to you. He's a little bar so she keeps dropping, you know, a little flirty flirt. Stop. Oh my God. Quit. You unplug her computer. She gets pissed. You're like, oh my God, never mind. Well, hey, took it too far. Now she hates me. Sorry. Okay, that's the line. That's the line. Then you're all weird the rest of the day to her. Sorry, Jessica. I mean, yeah. I love you.

I mean, sorry. God damn. Weird again. Even weirder. He's like being weird now. He turned off my computer. Now he's like being weird. But I would Nike ID,

I would Nike ID shoes in computer class because my computer at home, like the internet wasn't good enough for Nike ID. Like Nike ID had some like elite technology there like. like rotating the shoe. My like my RAM on my computer at home like what? It was all choppy and I was like God damn it. Like can we can I get like can we get just a little better computer at home? Never going to happen.

Got to do all the cool shit at school. Dude, you encapsulate you encapsulate like a 16 year old white high school girls so well that it really gives me PTSD. That's because I am a 16 year old white high school girl. Dude, it's like, wow, I'm literally back in that moment right now. My hands are starting to sweat. This is tough. She's telling all her friends.

Telling all her friends, dude. Oh, my God. Now you have to go. Dude, you have to go on like a PR tour. Like, you have to go on like a PR mission after that shit. He's like being creepy now. I turned off your computer. Yeah, that was mean.

Like, can I, dude, girls, can I get a W ever in high school? Jesus. Never once. from Anthony title football instinct fellows what's good happy new year really hoping you'll make an exception for the sports question since this isn't a sports podcast nah we'll let it slide weekend

watching the Eagles Rams and it was relatively crowded mostly older guys and then me and my buddies who are late 20s high school football washups during a pretty heightened a moment of the game Jalen Hertz fumbled and the entire bar yelled ball and perfect symphony of people who used to play football really just made me laugh and think these people are all just clubhouse guys

my question to you is are there any things you still yell on instinct when watching sports there are obvious ones like yelling and one and after watching a layup on TV but was just wondering if you had anything you just automatically stay watching sports as if you were on the sideline. Slop my ass so hard

I go back in time and properly teach Jason Pierre Paul how to light off a firework so he saves that part of his hand doesn't have to wear a club sent from my iPhone JPP, dude. Boy, do I. What do you say? Oh, man, well, like you said, you have your obvious, you know, ball and one for sure.

But then football, if there's a ball in the ground, get a ball, get a ball, get a bump, get a bit, get him, it's a fun boat. usually all of them together. And then it doesn't matter down or doesn't matter distance that doesn't matter what point it is in the game. If the opponent is punting

to the team I'm rooting for, I say watch fake, don't jump. Oh, watch the fake. Oh my God. In my head every time. I have to say it. I mean, it is literally a tick for me.

Watch fake. don't jump. When the ball's in the air, hold on to the ball. Hey, this is what I say. Every time without fail, when any team misses an extra point, it's going to come back to honum. 100% of the time every time. Dude, in it always, they always lose by one. Yep.

Chasing points. That's going to come back to honum. Like I'm the first guy to say it every time I say it. Hey, that's going to come back to haunt him. Same thing with free throws and hoops. Yep. You go through stretch or your team, you know, misses like three of five. They're free!

Yeah, I got to hit those FTs, dude. Got to hit those FTs. Baseball, big, like... Oh, man, I don't know. Baseball for me. Where's that at, Blue? On my couch, watching the Cubs. close call it's a ball good eye leave that i'll do that if it's too low leave that dude leave it

we're fine leave it we're fine we're good we're good we're good i'd say that's my biggest one though in football watch fake don't jump hold on the ball because i swear i swear if i don't say it miles Kilabrew or Calvin Os, somebody fucks up. Somebody jumps. Yeah. A lot of game left. Hey, a lot of game left. Down by two touchends. Four seconds to go in half. Hey, we're a second half team. A lot of game left. Hey, third down, any third down. Get a stop. Just like that. We need this. Stop. You have to feel. No, it's, that's what it is. Third down. Let's go. Go on, get a stop.

Third and four, they convert with a five-yard out route to the sticks. Every time. Come on, get off the field. That's what it is. Get a stop and then followed by get off the field because they didn't get off the field. From Brad.

Awesome, as you guys read my email. Just to follow up, Jordan wore the 45 because that was his baseball number during his brief retirement stint after that first three-peat. He actually came back mid-season in Market Square Arena and lost. They definitely would have known about this. Love the show. Oldest daughter is wearing it for Jersey Day this week.

Oh, nice. Oldest daughter wearing 45 Jordan? Oh my God. I'd be scared to talk to her if I was in her grid. Wow. Sorry, Brad. She's the cool one and all the girls are going to be like, I mean, they're all obsessive there

because she's wearing like that Michael Jordan jersey. That's a crazy pole. Yeah, Spirit Week. This is that weird spirit week in the winter. If you got some heat, Yeah, yeah, I've been saving. I got it for Christmas. I haven't worn it yet.

It's like a red, white, and blue day for Spirit Week. Throwback jersey. You're like, I put that shit on today. It's a Wednesday. You might have that. Might go a little too hard on a Wednesday. Kobe Olympic USA jersey with a white waffle shirt underneath.

White wall. Yeah. Hey, everybody. Guess who's here? You get to school early that day? Guess who's here? Mama. The winter spirit week is so weird.

The fall one's so high because it's like football and there's pep rally and it's like on a Friday and there's a game and then there's the dance. Winter one, it's just like, I guess we're doing this just to get through this terrible weather. Kind of showing off a little bit. Winter spirit week, aka what did you get for Christmas? Winter spirit week. No, the winter dance, man. Weirdest thing of all time. What is this?

Do we have to go? Dude, I never wanted to go. Come on, winter formal. I'm like, this is so, what do we wear? It's the snow globe and the girls ask the guys, but they never do. Oh, that's the biggest scam of all time. The girls ask the guys. Tell me one time a girl asked you to do anything.

Not chance. This is from, wow. This is from Ryan. It says Mark Bernel, hidden Jim's tops card. What's up, boys? This is going through my card collection recently and stumbled upon a couple. I know you'll appreciate. Ben, if you can pull it up on your phone or something, but it is.

It's a Mark Brunel, old school Jaguars, probably 97, 98, Jaguars, something like that, with like a rainbow hidden gems behind them, very slick. And then a Howie Long, L.A. Raiders. with the cowboy collar, just honestly looking like you and your casket with the crossbar face mask. Do either of you ever collect sports cards?

If so, do any favorites come to mind? There's just something about ripping packs with your boys, sleeving them up, making trades, etc. Thanks for the laughs.

P.S. slap my ass while I wear a hoodie under my Jamal Charles jersey. Oh, what color is the jersey? I think it's white. I'm picturing white. Picture in white

with a gray hoodie. or red with a white hoodie. Somebody get a Jamal. Somebody wear a Jamal, Charles, Texas jersey to the Super Bowl, please. Thank you. Priest hole. How do we not?

I don't have a Chiefs jersey. What am I doing? I guess I could have sworn you did. I know. Yeah, but this is. Did you collect cards? Hard. Really?

Yeah, I did. I did for in second grade. one of my homies guy who farted a lot everybody's got a guy that farts a lot but he had the he had the nastiest card collection like he was he's been in the game

for a couple of years he might have got a couple from his dad like dude he had this and I was like I got to get on that so me and three my friends started collecting cards and I had the little sheets the binder God I wish I could find that binder man had a couple good cards stole a couple from that

the fart guy too not going to lie Yeah, because it's like you don't feel bad about it because you're like, you'll just ask his mom and she'll take him to K&L cards and buy him whatever the hell he wants. If there was one thing my mom, yeah, and they were like the low key not good cards either. Like I swiped an Antonio Freeman from them. Like, that's not doing anything. But if there's one thing, my mom wasn't going to buy me, it was a pack of cards because they were like so unreasonably expensive. But like the one, the one time you do get one, maybe for your birthday or something, it is a thrill. opening that.

Because it feels like it's nothing's ever been touched. You're just like, oh my God. I feel like I need to put on like gloves for this. So clean. The car is the, the feel of the cards, man.

Dude, the smell. Oh, it is the smell. There's something about going into like a, like sports cards, a little store or two that you're like, oh,

this is special. I have, I did collect as well. Yeah, from probably about like, I don't know. seven to 10, seven to 11. I had a pretty solid run going there.

And then stopped and then dude during COVID, like the heat of COVID. I remember this. You ever exploded? And I like also like was like, shit. That seems fun. Yeah, that's cool. Everybody's just desperate to like get into something. And then also at the time I was like, you know, I was married about having

any kids. I was like, hey, hopefully like I'll do this now. And then if I, you know, when we have kids, if I have a son, you know, I'll be able We'll start them off with a pretty solid little collection. And now I still have them right over here next to me. So there you go. Did you get any good ones during COVID? That you were like,

did you get like a Kobe rookie? Dude, the rookie cards were so sick when you got a good rookie card. Actually, any rookie card, no matter what, I was like, oh. I'm trying to remember, honestly, the one that comes to mine, they had like a slam series where they took the cover of slam magazines. Dude. Al Harrington Rookie.

slam card. I got the, uh, I got, I got, I got a mellow one. It was just like super super sick. Super sick. That's insane. Your house gets robbed tonight. I'm not like, I'm not even a huge mellow guy at all or anything, but it was just like, damn, that is a sick idea and a sick card. I remember that. Who's a design in the cards? Right. Upper deck designs. Like all that cool stuff behind them. It's like, you know, it's like, I forget what it's called. What is it when it's like a, they have like a city series one now where like it'll be a Peyton Manning one for the Colts and behind them is like the Indianapolis Motor Speedway and like that skyline of downtown Indy. Yeah, but it's all it's all like different texture behind them and stuff. You're like holographic.

Oh, it's amazing. Holographic cards stranglehold on me, dude. Every guy just in love with the holograph. Card because this is. Didn't matter who it is. Pokemon, sports card, whatever. Oh, man, I got to sleeve that up. I'm holding on to that. Kenan McCardell, holographic, Jaguars card.

Oh, my God. Do anything for that. It's from Mitchell. Benny Politi and Ryan Braun. Same guy? Ryan Braun. Got to look at them up. Fellas, what is your favorite non-N-FL-N-Fort's theme music?

The three I really like are M.L.B. on Fox, the Masters on CBS and IndyCar on ABC from the 2000s. Smack my ass with a 630 a.m. steak sandwich in the North Vista bleachers as I watched the sunrise over the greatest racetrack in all the land on Memorial Day weekend.

Love that. Looking forward to that as well. He sends a picture here and it's of Ryan Braun and there's some similarities. I mean, you know, tall guy with dark hair and muscular. I mean, hair transplant. Okay. It will be on Fox is sick

I mean those are all great selections there Mitchell MLB on Fox What's that sound like? Because I think that's I like that too I love that actually Yeah

NBA is coming back to NBC I hope they have If they don't have that theme song I don't want them to modernize it I don't want them to do it. Just keep it how it was. That's a good one. My favorite all time is probably like the 2007 ESPN ABC college football.

With the BCS logo. Do, do, do, do, do, do to do do do do do do do do do do do. Nothing was more college than that. drums going on the back Was that the one What was the recap show called On Saturday night at like 11 p.m. Couldn't miss it.

College football final. Oh! College football final Mark May, Lou Holtz. Reese Davis, baby Reese Davis. College football final. When I saw that on my TV guide, bro, I never clicked anything faster in my life. I never wanted to watch a segment more than the helmet stickers.

The way they put them on too, just slipping those things. Never, never an air pocket in there. It was just always straight up, dude, flushed. On the shi-sass helmets. I was like, that's so sick that ESPN just has every fucking helmet. Where'd they get that helmet? Dude, San Jose State. Louisiana-Ragin.

agent's helmet? Guy ran for 657 yards in one game. They got the helmet the same day. Is it a rule for every football program to send their helmets to ESPN? The updated one? Yeah, that's some like ESPN Disney World magic type shit where you're just like, I don't, this is like a mystical thing. Yeah, of course at ESPN, they just have the Georgia Tech yellow jacket walking around and he's

bringing Mark May, the Rajan Cajun helmet. And it's like, it's a good face mask too. It's never like a stupid cheesy fucking lineman face mask. It's like the cool like three like Randy Moss. You're like, oh, how'd they get that?

Bro, they just have helmets all over the desk at the end of the segment. And they're just like, we'll see you next week. I'm like, I'm going to cry, bro. Lou Holtz always having a Notre Dame player, you know, him and Mark May feuding. I love that.

Fight. Do you have any that you really? besides NBA and NBC? NBA, NBC. It's kind of a played one, but it's so good, I can't. Dude, NFL on Fox is just crazy. I do like Fox.

Dude, Fox is so superior. Super Bowls on Fox. I know you know. Can't wait. CBS SEC really hits me hard. Yeah. Da da da da da da da da. I'm like, God.

I just, every time I hear that song, I just picture Chris Leak. I'm like, pray to you, Chris Leak. The eyes on that guy. I mean, what? We talked about Burpy boy.

We talked about March Madness, CBS. I mean, earlier in the show. I mean, that's a tough one. I think there might be a hockey one out there too. That's kind of a sleeper. But yeah, CBS March Madness is like nothing else, man. Fox can't really do basketball, can they? Nope.

They're strictly football. They do a little bit of hoops, but yeah, not NBA shit, unless it's like local. Fox Sports, Indiana, Christenary from Andrew. Fox Sports Net, bro. Andrew, we're going to come back to you next week, actually. That was a long one. We're going to come back to you. Bring back spots.

I'm going to unread that. Mark is unread so we can come back to you. But here we go. Let's go to Dylan. Vegas week of the year. What's up, Benny and Joy, Joy. I had a clubhouse kind of day at work, and I had to share. On New Year's Eve, my boss walked in our workplace in the morning and told all my coworkers and I had to do online training all day since it's New Year's and there's nothing going on. So we did training for like two hours, and then we all got to talking and we ended up going to the

store and buying some burgers and dogs. We fired up the grill and had a big cookout all while on the clock. The icing on the cake was that we turned on the TV and watched the Tony the Tiger Bowl between Washington and Louisville with a huge Tony the Tiger had painted at the 50-yard line. All that I was thinking about is this is the most clubhouse workday of all time. That station Fisher didn't know about this. God, that's sick. My question is, was there a time at the station or a different job? You guys had that entire day.

It was just a big fuck-off day. And what did you do? Hoping these guys live will go ahead and go on the road later this year so you can slap my ass in person. I love to. What an email. Made my day. God, yeah, that's an ideal work day. I guess my question is like, where is your office?

in terms of you can just go over to the store, get all that shit, and then also you just have a grill there? It's very cool, but I'm just curious. On some holiday hours, boss would let it slide if you knew. It's a good feeling. You're like, I mean, we got it all done. Come on. Come on.

I had one of those days. I've talked about it before, but I used to work at champ sports in the mall. And before, like, I have, forget what year it was, honestly, but we were, the mall was open before Christmas 24 hours. And it was insane. And I was like, what? And I was like, put me on like the, the craziest shift. Put me on like 2 a.m. to 7 a.m. I just want to be up while the mall's open on like December 23rd. Like, I don't know, nobody was like hardcore shopping. It was just a lot of people that like wanted to be at the mall at like

3 a.m. and shit like that. So it was just like everybody was chilling. We weren't really selling anything, but we had to be there. And like our speakers didn't work for some reason. So we plugged like my iPhone in the ox for the champ sports speakers. So we were just playing like Rick Rock. Like just I had like a Pandora edited on. So we could play anything. And it was all edited, bro. And it was the coolest thing ever. Like our boss was like yeah, bro. I mean, yeah. No, wasn't our main boss wasn't in there. It was like our like assistant manager who like he ran at like a good a good store. But he was just like yeah, throw it on. And I was like, oh, best night ever. December 23rd. You're walking out of there. Snapbacks back. I don't go to sleep. Snapbacks back.

F off day. My job was my whole job was F off day. I mean. Graveyard. Radio and then like digital media and we're always fucking around dude mowing grass in a cemetery listen to colin cowherd all day doesn't get much better than that every day was an f-off day and that for sure remember one day we did and this was like

kind of meant to be an f-off day I guess but like we did a handlebar bike as like a team bonding like get out of here dude get out of town get out of town team bonding come on then the manager's idea of the group who did that

like it wasn't so had a manager, but then we had like that manager's overseer, but he still wasn't like the big boss, you know, like, so he got approval. It was his idea and he got approval from the big boss, but then like shit just ran a muck and everybody just got way too drunk. And he ran up the company card probably something crazy. And it was like, yeah, like the next week, it was like, yeah, we're not ever doing that again. Hey, good job, everybody. We hit our goal and we bonded as a team, but we're never doing that again. Oh, racking up on the company card.

But when you're like not the guy in charge, feels pretty good. You're like, I can't get in trouble for this. No sweat off my back. That's a good feeling. You still feel kind of guilty, though, you know? The main guy walks around. You're like, I did throw something at a car that day.

There's always one thing that I'm like, oh, God, I hope they didn't get that on camera somehow. Hey, we were on the handlebar and this car drove a little too close to us and I flipped them off. And I'm wearing my, I'm wearing my company shirt and I forgot that I was. So hopefully he didn't report that. I totally forgot. Got so drunk. Party in the USA was on.

I poured my whole beer on a car's windshield. Hope they didn't call the station. Station, know about this beer? A whole core's light. Fox the bartender wiping down the bar station out about this hey can we turn the game on

I just stand off the station if it was on or not bro you could say that at any time I'm doing anything station now about this cooking eggs station now about this right you DM a girl

you get a text station now about this it's so funny come down from the top That was like eight years ago. It still just lives on, bro. It's never not been funny. Yeah, we'll get to Andrew next week because it was a really long email.

So I want to have time to be able to get into it. But team these guys at gmail.com. Appreciate all of you for emailing in, for listening, for following, for subscribing on YouTube. These guys Clubhouse on YouTube watches every week. Appreciate that. You know the deal, baby. You know, we're just, we're like, we just like to have fun and bullshit and have a laugh and have you guys along with us. And we just need more people to keep to keep joining in on it.

So more people. Good word for us so that we can come slap your ass on the road in person and things. Yeah. Ben, what do you got? Brea, see you tomorrow. Wednesday. Get your tickies. Bennyplitze.

com, then Chicago, Rosemont, Pots Town all coming up soon. Come to come to the Shus. And yeah, comment, fake names in the NFL. All name, we need an all name team.

Champ Bailey, Thai law. So many, dude. Lawyer Malloy. All name team. All right. But yeah. Good deal. All right.

Clubbust, we'll talk to you next week. Bye-bye. Marty Booker These guys Oh Brandon Stokely Ravens Ravens Brandon Stokely

Ooh I forgot about that