THESE GUYS! - Deck The Dante Hall

Episode Date: October 29, 2024

this week the burpy boys realize they’ve lost 47 turtlenecks throughout their lives📺 𝗪𝗔𝗧𝗖𝗛 𝗢𝗡 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗧𝗨𝗕𝗘 https://youtu.be/xxQ75QbyHHY🎟️ 𝗕���𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 San Diego - Nov 7 https://www.micdropcomedy.com/shows/264571Buffalo - Nov 14 https://buffalo.heliumcomedy.com/shows/254521Phoenix - Dec 5 https://www.micdropmania.com/shows/264572Sacramento - Dec 15 https://concerts.livenation.com/we-own-the-laughs-in-the-sacramento-california-12-15-2024/event/1C006131DC6A4508?_gl=1*zvzgd5*_gcl_au*MTk0MzQ4MTA5NC4xNzI5MjMzNzgy&_ga=2.252934153.1611751562.1729233782-1846946392.1729233782Rutherford - Jan 9 https://www.bananascomedyclub.com/shows/285024💕 WATCH BENNY on LOVERS and LIARS (CW APP)

If I was a dog and you kept giving me the backyard, nothing really going on back here, man. I get it. Yeah. I got some room. But the front, the front's a little sexy. You got cars. You got people. You got stuff you've never seen before, you know?

Like, there's a whole new world in the front yard. You let me go there once and I get hit by a car. I got to go back. I got to go that. Guy who has a dog brain. Yeah. Not bad for a fat guy. TG 106.

TG 106. 106. 106 dropping tricks. What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up, bro?

Hey, tickies real quick. Upcoming stand-up comedy show, San Diego, November 7th. Buffalo, November 14th. Phoenix, December. Then. Get your tickey. Benny.

Potee. Or in the link right under the right under there. Hot, hot, hot. You got New York coming up, yeah? Hot, hot. Yeah, the ninth. I think of the caveat. I don't know.

How about making that up? I don't know. Yeah, it should be fun. Going out there with my dad. Found a Steelers bar out there because we're going to be there for the weekend and the Steelers play the next day. And so I was like, I know New York's got to have some Steelers bars. So I found one.

A Steelers bar, bro. one in every town. There's probably a Steelers bar in Greenwood, Indiana. Yeah, got to feel at home. It's going to be nice. Got to feel at home on the road. How was the birthday?

Good, dude. You know what I did? I saw that stat that was like how many uncrustables each NFL team ate. Do you see that? Mm-hmm. Yep.

I think I was leading the way. I think I ate the same amount as the Broncos yesterday for my birthday. Broncos ate like 700 a week. But I just saw that graphic and made me so hungry for uncrustables. I just went off on uncrustables. Why do NFL teams eat them so much?

Is it like it's, it just gets good sugars back to them? Or what's the reasoning? Yeah. It's just quick. P.B. and J. fill you up. Not that bad for you. But it is also a donut. So I don't really know why. Yeah. I'm confused by that.

I'm confused with all sorts of that health shit. You know, it's like, yeah, after working out, drinking a beer is good for you. It releases the toxins. Oh, after you work out, have chocolate milk and an uncrustable. That's bad. Yeah. I mean, that's pretty much a beer. I don't know why, bro.

I think your body just needs to replace a bunch of stuff and uncrustables are quick and easy. Here. Chocolate milk definitely helps. but I mean that's beer bro mickle of ultra and that's such a lie like come on you remember those commercials

with like Chris Pratt and he was running a marathon and in between like during the marathon he would stop and instead of getting a glass of water he'd get a mickle of ultra kind of want one though might have been a Super Bowl commercial honestly if I'm thinking about it that's so stick just crack a cold one

just random. All right. So 700 uncrustables. What else? What went down? Did you treat yourself to a little cake? Did you get anything good?

Do 34 year olds get presents anymore? I didn't do anything. I just did normal stuff. Got a Chipotle label, three scoops of chicken, a little bit of guac. So do you find yourself being more annoyed on your birthday now

because it's having to repost and to answer a whole bunch of shit without all of the good stuff that it used to be? Dude, I like birthdays when you don't do anything. I had the best day yesterday because I was just like, yeah, I'm just going to do normal stuff. But I had like birthday luck, you know? Something

like magical always happens on your birthday. Like even when you're not trying. You know. What was it? What was the birthday look? Ooh, you know, I got a pint of Ben and Jerry's. And I was like, I'm only going to get it if they have that one kind and they they never do so i was like i probably

won't even get it but i just looked like do how down bad are you when you're looking for a pint in the freezer i just want freezer cam at target me squatting down get like a catcher stance just like i've never paid attention to anything more in my life than all the like oh no not that dude peanut butter world they had it copped it and i was like there's a birthday luck right there because they never have that. Like it's, it's so, I don't know, I've only seen it like two times. I was like, it'd be crazy if they had it. They had it. Got some of those, got some uncrustables. Had a night, bro. Had a night. Good for you, man. Probably sounds sad, but no, it's the best day ever. No, clubhouse knows what makes you sad and what makes you happy.

But what it made you sad is if you had to go to a birthday party, that would have been, oh my God. Come on. on. I would have gotten over it though, but like the dread of like, what do I even wear? That's a lot. You know what I mean? That's always the part of the thing I don't want to do. Like there's a party. All right. It could be kind of dope. But like all the things, like, I don't want to drive. Where do we park? What do I wear? Like, that'll make me not go. But the party itself is like, okay. Yeah. I'm in this. I bought two sweaters on Friday. Let's see. I don't have them on me.

But what I do have on me real quick is the Unreal Steelers Color Rush hoodie that they sent to me. So for those watching it on YouTube, these guys Clubhouse on YouTube, subscribe, subscribe, subscribe. I should know about this. You'll see this sick, Unreal. Literally, that's the brand, Unreal Color Rush Steelers hoodie. They send it to me. They're probably sold out honestly now, but it's super comfy, super cool. You should go get yours at Unreal because they're.

Unreal. To God. Yeah, dude, on Friday, I just went, I bought, we had, we had family pictures on Saturday morning. And like fall family pictures. And you hold in. I just said. Did you? Not even the, not even the kids.

Kids, no kids, no wife. Hey, can I get this with the pumpkins real quick? Just you. So can I get the solo shot holding the pumpkins by the stems just makes me look cool. Hey, can I get a solo shot real quick and me pouring this apple butter in my mouth? Okay. Honey, turn away. But now I was just like, man, I need some, I need some sweaters. You ever get that feeling? You're just like, I need, look, we're going, like, it's the end of October.

We're getting ready to go into, you know, the gray days with the leaves on the ground of November and then December. You're like, I just need some sweaters. I'm like that about turtlenecks, but I don't know, what kind of sweater are you talking about? I never, like, I'll buy a turtleneck and the next year, I'm like, I don't know where that went. Like, they just disappear. they disappear because we wear them during Christmas time and then it's always some crazy fucked up shit going on that you're wearing it to on Christmas time.

Burby boy, whoa, and then you never see it again. I'm the same way. I have like two or three turtlenecks from the past year two that I get because I wear them underneath my sweaters and my vest during Christmas time

because I'm holiday man. Yeah. And I never know where they go. A turtle neck under a sweater is such a look. Like it's kind of like a costume him a little bit, but it's not. It's like you can still wear it. Like, is he doing a thing?

Or is that, that actually looks good too, but so I'm not going to ask. That's so true, man. I just feel like I'm going up to the Kansas City Chiefs. That's me and Ben's Christmas gifts to each other. Chiefs turtle neck. Here's that turtleneck you're talking about.

Oh, thanks. NFL logo on it. Chief on the other side. Just, just an all red sweater. Me and you wearing all red sweaters with Chiefs turtlenecks underneath and Santa hats on. Oh my God, please. A touchdown throw from Trent

Green. Dude, can we play, can we make a Christmas album, all NFL songs? On the second day of Christmas. Man. I catch him Tony Gonzalez. It's only that era of chiefs though.

It's like not even the new chiefs that like win the Super Bowl every year. It's just the chiefs when they had Trent Green, dude. Hey, name a better it's that Chief's team, Chief's team is so much more likable for some reason. For sure.

Eddie Kenison. Wow. That's so true, man. Yeah, I would love to do an NFL. Has anybody ever done that? An NFL Christmas? Besides us. I guess Jason Kelsey and the Eagles

do like their own Christmas album and they are NFL players, but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about instead of the 12 days of Christmas is the 12 days of Chiefsmiths. You guys even like the Chiefs? No.

You guys even live in Missouri? No. Why did you make a whole Christmas album about the Chiefs? I don't know. Because Johnny Morton did the worm and the ends on that one time and I've liked him ever since.

Does it matter? Why are you asking? Dante Hall, the human joystick. La la la la la la la la la. So dumb Felice Gonzalez Felice Gonzalez

I want to wish you a Tony Gonzalez I want to touch that from Tony Gonzalez Dude I'm all in I'm in now man And God how that would be amazing You're back in town It's like four days before Christmas Me and you just drinking wine

red Santa pants on white turtleneck chiefs with a Santa hat on big wine stain on mine sorry yeah they do you listen to these guys I think I've seen a little bit of it should I yeah it's like I can't tell because Joey wears Steelers stuff but like all they talk about is a Packers and Chiefs oh really and Benny he has like he'll wear like a Chris Collinsworth 80s Bengals jersey I don't know what's going on what's going on what team do they, what team do they like? Doesn't matter.

Doesn't matter. You just got to get the show, baby. Just got to get the show. It doesn't matter. Plain and simple. Yeah, but my sweaters, you ask what kind they wear. Like, they're straight up.

Like, I got one, like their most holiday ass sweaters ever. I got one that's creamy. The color is cream. I can't. believe you're not going to go get them right now. And the other is green. It's literally

like Advent calendar green. Like this green? Yes. Like Trent Green. I mean, sorry. This guy. And they're so cozy and I rocked them on Saturday for my family photos. We're outside just being fall ass

bitches. And I can't wait to wear them three times a week starting probably next week as we get into the holidays. Do we even care about Thanksgiving anymore? Dude, Halloween's so over, by the way. Oh, my God. Halloween's never been more over.

Like, officially done. Did we already do it? Did we already do it? I love Halloween. I do. You know this. And it's slowly crept up to be like 2B of my holiday

favorite holidays. Well, probably three because you go like Christmas Eve. Christmas 1A, 1B, right? Thanksgiving 2. Time stamp it. Time stamp it there, Steve. And it does, man.

It's just like done. Now that Halloween, as we record this on Monday, now that Halloween's on Thursday, it feels like it already happened. It feels done. Oh, yeah. If there's a weekend, yeah. If Halloween's not on a Saturday,

it's over before it starts. It's so over. I've seen, have you seen these yet? Have you seen Jennifer Hudson, Old Navy? commercial, Christmas commercial? I haven't. You don't watch TV. Who doesn't watch TV? Jennifer Hudson has an old Navy one that's

out already. There's an off brand of the Old Navy one with no Jennifer Hudson, an alternate version, and then there's a Kelly Clarkson Wayfair. And then I've seen a few Christmas tree companies that have been sprinkled in. That's probably going back to like October 18th. Yeah, I went to Joanne Fabrics

over the weekend. Just a winter wonder. There was no Halloween stuff in sight. And it was, this is like Halloween time, like last minute Halloween. Right. Dude, they had Christmas pumpkins and Joanne Fabrics. I was like, boy, both times two guys, but I love that. Oh, they're doing, yeah, because I've seen, you know, I've seen, I've seen Halloween trees. Halloween Christmas tree? Yeah. That is so, that is insane. Although we did have a black Christmas tree one year.

Like growing up? Nah, like in my college house. I was like, it makes so much sense. Hey, black Christmas tree instead of like putting a star on the top of it.

You know what I put out there? An all purple Colorado Rockies hat. Fitted. Fitted. Slet by it every night on the couch Like the couch of our like college house You know Just so dirty, so many stains

Just not Whose couch was it? No one knows You're so dumb, dude Rockies go No clue who's on their team Just purple looks good What do you mean?

You don't know a little Troy Toulouitzki? No, bro. Wait, there was some guy. I love the Rockies uniform. Now that this, are we crazy? We don't talk. What are we talking about, bro? I do like Halloween's alternate colors, though.

You know, like orange-black, so Halloween, right? But they mix in a little Volt in a little purple. And I'm like, I like alternate Halloween colors. Volt. Yeah, like the lime. Lime green. It's like that it's like what you. It's what you see from,

yeah, when there's like the blowups of like witches. It's big witches and cats. That's the alternate Halloween. On brand Halloween is skeletons and pumpkins. Alternate is witches and cats with the vault and purple. Yep. So vault skull. like in the enjoying fabrics took everything in me not to make out with it i was like god dang right

you can't well i can't walk past a skull without giving a little yeah i thought we would have seen that that plays very well too many people in the aisle you know yeah that usually doesn't deter you though you've done some pretty fucked up shit it was just and there were old people and i was like you know who knows what they think you know i just get next time you know Yeah. I almost said this and I'm going to say it now. But Rye's been giving me a hard time because recently I've been saying if it's about like a meal or if it's about a clothing item or something, I'll say, yeah, that always plays. Hey, no new words around girls. She's going to be giving me a hard time. She's like, you just talk like you're on a podcast 24-7. dude that is that's a funny concept

guy who thinks he's always on a podcast but I'm like I really I'm like really you think I feel like always plays just always plays like you could apply it to anything that plays yeah that plays

Pumpkins Pumpkin spice handle it plays we were at brunch on Friday or no it's breakfast we dropped Frank off at school me right and Mira went. And I forget what it was.

Scramble the eggs, those play. It was something like that. She was like, should I get, she's like, should I get, uh,

the eggs Benedict or should I get the Salmon breakfast? Salmon. I don't know why I said salmon. Jesus. Do you get the eggs Benedict or should I get the salmon? And I think I said, I mean, eggs Benedict always plays.

Yeah. It's just better than all. always works. It's just like a better way to say it. Yeah. I mean, I didn't. You just talk like you're always on a guy who's always on a podcast.

Well, give me your top five sides. Just in the middle of a conversation. Oh, wow. That's how works been going. Great. So who your top two edge rushers in next year's draft?

Not even, bro. If it's podcast, it's just, give me your top five cereals five to one. Thanksgiving sides. one to five. Every Thanksgiving podcast.

Side, side, side, side, side, side, side, side, side. That's my favorite when sports talk radio thinks that they're being relatable or feel so good about their topic of conversation. Hey guys, hey guys, hey guys, hey guys, hey guys, hey guys, it's a week before Thanksgiving. What if? What if? What if? Hear me out. What if we talk about the best.

sides. Don't you say stuffing? I call it dressing. Fuck off. Greenie casserole? I was actually I called stuffing. I called stuffing. You a heck? I was listening to ESPN radio, like national ESPN radio for some reason.

It was like during Greenie's hour. He's got that show from 10 to noon, but he wasn't in. So it was a filling of like four random guys. And they legit. legitimately we're talking about. All right. Give me your top three

greasy foods. Greasy foods. Does pizza count as greasy? Yes. What? What do you? Unless you're getting like a green pizza. What are you?

I'm like, this is, this is national? Okay. I don't know, man. I love talking about that stuff, though.

I can't hate. I can't hate too much. Everybody does. So it is. So it is yours. Everybody does. But it's just the fact that like those folks and especially you know you we know we're talking about we're talking about

the station all about this and that not bad for fat guys of the world where it's like they think it's so yeah anyways whatever we'll do it we're going to talk about that on the Thanksgiving episode like three weeks so whatever so curly prize or what is actually crazy that the majority of my like greater family the majority of my like the greater family the majority, not my two kids and my wife, but including my sister and my parents and everything. The majority, I'm in the minority there where I get curly fries. They get the regular fries. Top five fries.

Top five fries. One to five. Burpee boy. Whoa. Times three. These DPs are running through me. I'm totally a waffle fry guy. I kind of just, I mean, hey, it always plays.

Please. Come on, come on, come on. No, I kind of like every fry, honestly. But, uh, hey, sweet potato fries. You had a nice run. It's over. Sweet potato fries. I'm talking to you, pretty boy.

It's over. I thought you were going to say, let's kiss. I thought that's what we're lined up for. That's the Mickelope Ultra after working out of fries. They're healthier. makes sense shut up they're fries

bro shut up sweet potato fries with garlic aoli healthy I'm gonna kill myself you know how it's such a trend for everybody to like go

of their nickname their online brand to be like about a food or something you know I just I just wish I fries

I just wish I Joey Tater Tats Ooh And I look at your Instagram Reddit for this podcast Joey Tater Tots I'm like

No bro Just at just at garlic aoli Get that handle Before somebody else does At stuff crust Hey at Oh that's Joe

That's Joey Molenaro What's his Instagram Do you have his Instagram It's at Purple catch up. Dude, that would go. I mean, seriously. Imagine that.

Oh, yeah, we're going to see that guy do stand up. That Joey guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I followed one Instagram. What is it? Yeah, it's at garlic aoli. Dude.

I can't, is that, are we sure? It's him? I don't know. His username just says Dante Hall. I don't know. Can you imagine if you, hey, imagine that's how, that's how much I want to not care.

garlic aoli Dante Hall that's like all a bunch of the folks that Rive watches folks old guy but a bunch of the people

that she watches like the YouTubers and creators and everything they all have weird ass names like that like man I think about it sometimes

I'm like man the things that could have been at garlic aoli at garlic Ioli and at rotisserie Ooh, at Rotissory, chicky. Nah, I just wrote this. You're right.

Do you remember that, though? We were doing, this is way back in the Spress days. And we were getting on Seekwon Barkley so hard because he were like, his Instagram name was like at SBXVI-I underscore I-I. We were like, bro. What is that? A network station.

Station, how about this? Saturday Night out of a day? I'm like, how do you say your Instagram name somebody. I'm like, you are a, you're rich, bro. I don't know how or why, but you're rich just buy Sequin from someone. Coolest name ever just buy it. SBX, I, VV, I, 2.0 at ESPN.com. I'm like, what? Hey, later on, not that long after though, we checked. It was just Sequin. Boom. Somehow got somebody, I don't know how that happened. That's what I want to know about. I don't care about how what you, what you eat and how you work out and how your legs are so big.

How did you change your username to Saquan all of a sudden? How was that just available? That's the most. That's like a top three wish for me. And that's really, that really sounds like bad and people are probably like, wow, you're a dork. No. Like, dude, if I could, if I could, on Instagram, I could just have at Joey. I know. Buck all the way off. If you have just your first name, you're elite. It's so sick. Antonio Brown, AB, that's it?

What's your Instagram name? A.B. No underscore, no number. A.B. Cold. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, if you get it,

you get it. If you don't, you just don't get the show. Sorry. No, I think everybody understands that. That's just crazy, man. Yeah, that's the goal.

One day for you to just be at Benny and then me to be at Joey. That would be so, sick. We'll get those and Instagram will have like a hundred people on the app total. We got it. You know, it's like if we're on Vine right now with our, you know. How do you do it though? That's all I want to know is like, so, so there's a guy out there that just has all the Instagram handles. Like there's a guy out there that has Joey, has Johnny, has Frankie, has, and he just, you know, you got to pay them for them.

That's such a cheap-ass way to make money. But I guess. Well, there's, no, the guy who has Joey on Instagram, he's like a, like a fitness influencer. So he actually, I'm like, damn. Would you pay him? Because I have Joey Mullen Arrow. I mean, like, that's still, you know. It's like I have to have like two at the end of my name or something or some bullshit like that.

What a. Thank God. Yeah, people are listening to this right now. Just like, what are they even talking about? This is all I want to talk about, bro. This is all I want to talk about. I don't care. This in uniforms.

Dude, so I was at a, I was at a get-together on Saturday. And we did like a Halloween fest, you know. And then one of, one of my childhood buddies who, you know, you also know pretty well. He lives right down the road from this fest that we were at. So he had like a little get-together. He can say Clinton Corbyn, dude. No, not, not see-daddy. Not, not him.

All right, all right. You can stay Andrew Ward with whatever. No, I was at his house on Sunday. This is Saturday. Saturday. The German park, Bill and Evans, go on. Dude, what are we doing? All right, I'll shut up.

Oh, I know. But it was probably 10 adults, eight of them married couples. And everybody just had their kids there. Yeah. So we're talking probably like 12 kids. Maybe not. Probably like eight to 10 kids under like seven years old all there.

And it was just so funny because I just found myself like the entire time, all I was doing was having conversation with people I haven't seen and have a handful of years. But as I'm doing that, I'm just double the constant double check. Everybody, everybody's just once you get to be past 30 and then you all are having kids and everything, any get together you're at, you got to bring your kids.

And then any, any of those get together as you're at with your kids, all the conversation is is just all of you guys just double checking to see if your kids not. line off the playground or something. Everybody doing a double look back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh-huh. So that's pretty much all I'm doing.

You're trying to check in with each other and, you know, find where you're living and everything, but it's just nothing but just, all right. Yep. Nope, don't get on that. No,

not on the swing set like that. Yeah, so, I mean, we like it, but it's just, hey, what I say.

No, now get down. Right, but you guys like it where you are? Oh, yeah, that's awesome. Hey,

no, progressively more mad, too. Let's, let's not have candy first. okay let's have real food first but yeah um yeah that's cool man i'm glad that you guys are that you are like hey what i say talk to your mom talk to your mom like that's all it is for like four hours what we don't do it's just a it's just an ADHD test can you stay on can you do two things at once

that's what being in your 30s is it's got to be an outside lineback at the end of the day bro got to have your eyes on the guard and in the backfield at the same time time. So true. So true. Yeah, it's like I don't even remember when I talked out with anybody. I just remember just constantly checking up with my kid. Right. Always doing two things at once. Oh my God. What is I'm like what do you say? Oh shit. I don't know. I was just making sure my kid wasn't going to die. Yeah, pretty much. Just not retaining any information. That's why people in their 30s always forget everybody's names and you got to keep asking them. Oh, how's work? Because he can't remember of what they said last time because you're just checking on your kid.

No, no one's listening to anything. You're just making sure your kid doesn't break his neck on the swing set. Yep. Where did you say you work again? The high voice, because you really care. Anytime my voice goes real high, don't give a shit what I'm saying. Then you mix in, you know, everybody's got it, you know, Mick Ultra in hand. And so just the booze going in, the kids flying off the swing.

No one's, no one's hearing anything, man. And then all of a sudden, hey, I got to, I got to pee real quick. Every 30 seconds. Yep. What a lie. It does, it does provide a really good out, you know, like it provides a really good, well, not paying, but the kid. I got to go check on it. Dude, that's one thing about having a kid.

Not that I know, but. But you can get out a lot of shit with a kid. you can't you can't overrule the kid card there's nothing hey bro don't care about your kid come on

no one's ever said that oh that's cool but I don't give a fuck about your kid so let's go no one's ever said that will I be the first maybe I feel like you've been close with me probably in the last

two and a half years at this point bro you never play kid card you're always like dude my dog just shit all over my house and I'm like well okay I mean what are you gonna do

no I'm like my dog ran out the front door again stupid ass yeah if there's anybody out there in the clubhouse who's listening maybe you can help me out my dog is so like

I love my dog man there we go what you got a butter a bob before you tear him down I love my dog but might put him down what is what is going on with all right so here's a situation in my house i can't wait we have we have the

we have the front door that goes right out can we turn this into a minute real quick dude the minute is popping off come on let's go well it's not i just don't understand because we have the front door that leads right out to the porch that goes right into the street right right there's no fence there's no barrier for him yeah if he goes out the front door he's gone he's been hit by a car already keep that in mind. All right. We have a fenced-in backyard. We can let the door be open all day.

He can run right out there, come back in, fenced-in yard. He's not going anywhere. No problem. Why is it, Clubhouse, that he wants nothing more than to as soon as we touch the door handle on the front door to try to do everything he can to sprint. Not knows his way or jog. sprint out the front door into the street. Whereas when we open up

the back door, I literally have to walk onto the back porch. Come on happy, come on, happy, come on. And he is pitter-patter, pitter-patter, pitter-patter, doesn't want to go out the back door where he has all the land to run in the backyard. Why is that? Can somebody help me out? I don't understand.

Is it as simple as just nature where, you know, the old saying of like, you want what you can't have? He wants to go out the front door because he's not supposed to go out there. He doesn't want to go out the backdoor because it's too easy. Is it that? Or is my dog just a fucking idiot? Please help me out. I think the front is just more fun, man. He doesn't remember. And he probably liked it.

You probably wanted to play a little more at the Honda Civic. He's like you. He's just like, please run over my foot. Oh. Are we talking about your dog getting hit by a Honda Civic? Yeah, yeah, that's what we were talking about. I don't know. If I was a dog and you kept giving me the backyard, nothing really going on back here, man. I get it, yeah.

I got some room. But the front, the front's a little sexy. You got cars. You got people. You got stuff you've never seen before, you know? Like, it was a whole new world in the front yard. You let me go there once and I get hit by a car? I got to go back, dude.

I got to go back. Guy who has a dog brain. literally God dang it man it's like imagine imagine getting in an apartment in a building you want the front view

street view or you want the back view where you want to be I mean kind of I took it out I took it out of context a little bit a little bit anyways that's just my I genuinely drives me nuts

Is that it? Is that truly just all it comes down to? It's too easy for him and he just gets it whenever he wants. And so he's bored by it or is there like he's afraid of it? I don't know. Someone help me out. It's really annoying. Anyways.

Yeah, maybe in the comments. Comments this week. Hey, our last review that we had on Apple Pods, which please do, we keep getting every week, we've gotten more and more ratings. So really appreciate that. Keep that up. last, last review we got five stars, kissy face, Jay Feedler. When someone said that Jay Feedler, Jay Feely, and the other one was all on the

dolphins at the same time, I lost it. Did you see that? I don't know what that was on, but I just read it. It was like three of the same guys. That's why I couldn't watch the dolphins that year. I'm like, there's 19 triplets on their team. Their numbers are three, six and I know. I know. They were, too. I was like, guys. Can we just talk about J.P. Lozman for a little bit? Hold on. Did you see it real quick? I know not sports podcast and you don't watch TV, so probably not. But I just, that Hail Mary at the end of that Bears game. Bro, if it's on like Twitter, I've seen it. And kind of everything's on Twitter. It's the only reason I know anything. But yes, I saw that.

in dude i mean there's no words that you can really say because i mean that was just it was one of those like holy shit i'm so glad i was watching that live oh see i didn't watch it live so that is very different but nothing better man they dialed it up so perfectly dude just the quarterback like edging me before he throws it on every hill mary you know he's like in the pocket he's out of the pocket he's in the pocket he's in the pocket he's in the pocket he finds a place to set up I'm like oh he's good he's good to go step into it big dog

it's launch time it's launch time let's it ride I'm always like ooh don't come up short though you know like what a vibe kill when the quarterback can't make it to the end zone I'm like okay whoops

you know I said to my dad after it which was we were talking about it and I go that crowd pop was insane too. Because if you're watching it and you're listening, dude, when he catches that ball, I mean, you could hear a legit jump. And oh, yes, yes, man. And I said that crowd pop was insane. My dad just text back. Crowd pop question mark. Dude, your dad is so clean with the text messages.

First thing I saw on my birthday, your dad tweeted me. He goes, happy birthday, Benny, pick a present. and it was just a Ben Jarvis Green Ellis jersey and like the Christmas decorations at Home Depot. I was like, this is the best tweet I've ever seen. Yeah. Dad's nice with it, bro. I don't know how many times. Crown pop?

No, but he was like confused. He like didn't, he had never heard of that before. Oh, so, okay. So he, oh, no. He was wondering, he was wondering what it was. He was like crowd pop? and I had to be like, yeah, like the reaction, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, top five crowd pops. Now, sports, but I've seen this.

Now, I've seen this. Really? Hey, when Larry Johnson hit that three against a Pacers in the garden. Mm. Boy. Crowd pop. Crowd pop. That went the craziest ever.

I was like, I hate the neck. So my knit. Hey, then you did this after. I was like, that is so clean. I got to go. I got to go. We deserve to lose. Hey, not a sports podcast, but

Marlon Jackson's interception off Tom Brady to go to the Super Bowl. Crowd pop. Might be number one. Hat that says crowd pop on it. Top five crowd pops. Hey, YouTube. YouTube comments.

Top five crowd pops. I know you got one in your head. There is a good home run one too. I can't. There is a good home run. one. I can't, I don't know, I can't dial it up right now, but I remember this. Oh, shit. Damn. Hey, a real good one. I know this is going to be so mean. You're going to roll your eyes. Cubs, Cubs. Cubs. Game one of the DS in 2016 against the Giants. That's sports podcast.

Bottom of the eighth, nothing, nothing on the scoreboard. Hobby Baez, three, two pitch, fucking sends it into the Chicago night sky. It's never not been a three two pitch, bro. Jesus Christ. Hey, Matt, the sketch. I'm like, okay. Jesus. A bescursion, Matt bescursion on the call.

Sick name. Dude. Quedo with the quick pitch. Baez! Sid, Z, D. Bill Murray going nuts. Oh, dude. I got chills just now, bro.

No, sports podcast. Not a sports podcast. Nice. Running the callback. Those guys have no idea how much of an influence I have on me and you. Oh, totally, bro. Those, those memorable calls, I mean, I'm trying to stick with you.

I'm trying to think of other crowd pops that are like, what? Bob Lamie. And I said that Martin Jackson. Now I just get it. He's so overbearing. I'm like, I can't even, why, I can't even see anymore because Bob Lamie's so loud. Yeah, I'll be interested to see people's crowd pops. though.

There's one we're missing, man. I can't think. Yes, it was far when he threw it. Never mind. You want to go to the clubhouse? It's the only thing I think about are these questions.

I kind of want to just do them the whole time. Yeah. I got warm up, I thought about it at 8 a.m. this morning. Oh, yes. Clubhouse question. Clubhouse quit. Club Clubhouse question.

New intro? Team these guys. Team these guys at gmail.com. That's from William. Trent Green with the white chief's turtle neck. On brand, dude. Joey and Ben. Been listening to the show for a couple years now.

I was sick as a dog Christmas 2020. And remember this podcast getting me through a rough nighters. Awesome. Glad you're better. Glad we could be there to help. This is guy. This podcast is a guy safe space. What it is.

When you're like, when you're fed up, he's good. All right, go ahead, sorry. Not a sports podcast, but I got my wife

into one of my fantasy football leagues this year, and she's gotten really into it. Lazy Sunday is watching Red Zone and explaining to her handcuff running backs and the upside of rushing QBs will be moments I cherish. But my favorite moment so far was the other night when she asked me,

quote, who was Chad Ochosynko? any good stories from j and b out of a significant other becoming interested in something you like hope to see either of both of you in nyc area soon catch me there november 9th brough p s pps when you are talking about how you're constantly wondering if you overstayed your welcome same here i think that's just part of life we're in slap my ass with a rebuck powder blue ladenian talmson jersey while the our country by john melanchamp commercial plays during half time of my team losing on Sunday night football

and I pretend my homework isn't due tomorrow. Brandon Jacobs. Man, nice. Hit all the notes. Yeah, that is, that's a moment that women don't know about.

Like, you can really change you guys whole entire day if you just go up to him and you're like, hey, babe, who is Amon Green? Oh my God. That's uncharted waters right now. Yeah.

the uh well first of all the our country work done you know that that our country song and the john melon camp the the Sunday night football i remember that so vividly you must be about the same age as me dude or right around our age just middle school that early NBC

Sunday night football days can you sing it real quick because I don't know from the east coast to the west coast round Dixie Highway back home This is our country Down down

Down down Down down Weird nostalgia there Yeah Well I think I've told the story On this pod before Definitely have Ben knows it

It's probably one of his favorites It's certainly one of the favorites Of my family I was seeing a girl during the Cubs 2016 World Series run and she

we were to the point where like she was coming over to have dinner meet the fam kind of thing like all that and we're sitting there at the dinner table and we're talking about the Cubs and what's going on and she chimes in

and says yeah the other day this Cubs stuff's everywhere The other day I saw a guy walk into work with a Bay's jersey on Oh man And That'll do it Yeah so you know

You appreciated the effort and the attempt To be into something that I was into But then again it's like That's the advice of like Okay then like really Like if you're gonna come stepping You know like you should know What's going on

Because then all of a sudden It's just like I was like I don't know It was tough that's uh did you look around the table or did you not have i wouldn't have had the the guts to look around the table at my family after that i think i looked around to my sister and she gave me a look and we actually were just talking about that last week funny enough and she said yeah i just knew as soon she said that that this probably wasn't going to go well and this wasn't look i bet your dad saved it

totally you know so what's your top five size on things yeah all days are coming up um I'm not

I'm not that shallow that that's something that I would be like oh I just can't do it anymore it didn't work out for other reasons it didn't work out for other reasons

but that's just a funny example it's just a funny example of it really is yeah that's a bad one she tried though but hey look up a YouTube clip in your car

before you walk in the house. Right. Come on. You know, that's, that, that's all I have to, that's all, that's all I'm asking, you know, don't, don't send the, the, the gifts and stuff and act like, you know, come on. All right. But yeah. Um, did you have any of those? Did you have one of those? That's actually never happened to me. Um, you don't really end anything like that. So. So what? I said you're not really like into anything like that to the point where it's yeah it's like when a girl asks you like you know maybe take a girl to a game and she asked a question about the game that's as close as I've gotten you know you're you take a girl at a football game and she's like so I just don't understand like second and seven and you're like you become like an

NFL expert all of a sudden all the sudden you're like I made I made the game of football so Yeah, we were talking about that, how you feel so special when you're like, now he's the dime defender. Most basic knowledge. Right. Or sometimes a girl started talking about the uniforms. And I'm like, okay, I can get into this. Like, do you really want to know? Like, or we'll keep it service level.

Two hours go by. She's not even at the table anymore. I'm just talking to no one about the wizards uniforms in 2001. so they were supposed to have black, but Michael Jordan wasn't going to be with the Wizards anymore, and then they decided to forgo. Sir,

we're closing the restaurant. Oh, shit. No, but yeah. Hey, hey, something to put in our movie. That scene right there.

I got to write that down right now. Go ahead. Get this next question. I'll read this next email while you write that down. That's from Robert. Subject line. My best.

My best. No, go ahead. New thing on the pod. Put it in the movie. Put it in the movie, bro. From Robert, football sideline phone. Boys, long time, second time. Cool.

One of the latest episodes, you were reminiscing, shocking, about game days or even game weeks in high school. One of my favorite memories and my dad's two was a high stakes game. Coach screams down from the press box to the sideline. God damn it,

get Smith on the phone! And boy, did I feel like the man, standing on the sideline in front of everyone in the stands, talking on the red sideline foam, steam floating from my sweaty head. Mind you, I was the center. Usually the phone was reserved for quarterbacks and linebackers, the cool positions. Speaking of cool positions, I'm tired of numbers being wrong for NFL positions now. Five for a corner? 23 for a linebacker?

Horrible. Five is a quarterback running back and 23 is running back or slot. Go back to the golden days of numbers. Slap my ass. Just slap it. nice simple to the point I don't think we had the technology

yet or the funds to have a phone so what do you mean get him on the phone is he talking like you see him and he's talking like the OC up at the box you know it's on the phone yeah but we didn't have that like we when we played yeah

no how did they do that Like, how did the guy in the box? Oh, the headsets? You would just go over. I remember one time, like, the guy in the press box had to say something to the quarterback and they couldn't, like, communicate it through a middleman. And the quarterback just went over to the headset.

And the guy in the box was like, yo, when they switched to cover two, da, da, da, remember to whatever. Checking out that this is a sports podcast. But I think that became the phone. But those pictures are always the coolest. those old NFL pictures, picture of Trent Green on a red phone. I'm like, is he talking to Pizza Hut?

Like, what is he calling? You know? When I was a kid, I was like, who's on the phone with him? I remember Brady Quinn against USC in 2006. They were playing at USC

and Notre Dame was always getting their ass kicked by USC back then. And I think they were down like 17 or something. Brady Quinn just came off the field. they cut to him on the sideline. He picks up the phone and you can just tell he says something

just like, shut the fuck up. It just hangs it up. I was like, hell yeah, be cute. Love cameramen, just getting just worst timing ever. Yeah, totally. I'm with you on the numbers. I don't,

I bet Ben's the opposite. I just give me receivers in the 80s, give me linebackers in the 50s, give me corners in the 20s, like, I don't know. I don't really like it either. Yeah. I think people like it is the thing.

I think we're in the minority. I feel like you would like it. I do kind of like it because I didn't think I would, but it kind of like transitioned well. Like now I'm like, okay, yeah. I'm over receivers in the teens. I need them to switch back to the 80s. That'll never happen, man.

sad, but we're never, we're never going to have like a, the best receiver in the NFL be number 84 or 81 ever again. Man, it's a bummer. I know, it really is, but like, it's just, they're not cool numbers. They were cool when you had to be them, but no, nobody's ever. I don't know, dude, 88. That is a wide receiver, bro. 88, 84, 81, that is receiver.

For sure, but like, not for, dude, the cool players. are all in the single digits and in teens. And when you're a kid and you're seeing that, you're like, oh, I want to be number 88, huh? Yeah, I kind of, I liked it when it was like very like professional. Like NFL, you're receiving an eight year in the 80s, running back here in the 20s, 30s, 40s. Right, that's like all those weird numbers. That's for the fucking college shit when they have 88 players on the team and they have to divvy up numbers in a certain way.

I think the NFL did that to to like because it wasn't as fun you know NFL was getting kind of not fun and they're like okay let's make your favorite receiver number zero how about that? The only one I like is Patrick

Queen number six from Steve. Can't tell them if the Steelers or not bro how are we supposed to know that is if Joey Porter Jr. Switches to number one. then I'll like it. Actually,

because the Steelers don't give out number one. But he won't number nine because that's what he was in college, but Baswell has nine. So I don't know what he's going to do. But anyways, who cares? Wait,

what position is queen? Middle linebacker, bro. Yeah, it's hard. That's hard. Number six? I mean, so you kind of like it.

Just Patrick Queens. It's it. I can't tell if I think I like it, honestly. I'm leaning towards I like it. Bring back sideline phones. Just the old-ass ones too. Bring back quarterbacks right when they go to the sideline.

They put on the team hat. Remember that? Every time a quarterback in the NFL went to the sideline just immediately. He's like, God, why does he want to wear the hat so bad? I kind of thought they had like, did they have a contract? Maybe. But they had like a hat guy who was designated to once they were taking their helmet off would give them their hat. Yeah, like Pete Manning coming off the feet.

immediately getting the Reebok Colts hat. It's like there's no way he needs to wear a hat that bad. Like is he insecure about his hair? Like why? But I wonder if it's like a branding thing. They didn't want any pictures or videos of him on the sideline without like a logo. But it was so immediate when I was a kid.

Bro, we had a game in fourth grade. And I was going to get a Washington hat to put on the side to wear on the sideline. Because I was like, dude, the guys in the NFL do it right when they, touch the sideline and get off the field. I was like, I'm getting a getting a skins hat, bro. Boom. Isn't it crazy?

How much when you're that age, you just, because you, you, right now we still want to be that, but we can't because we, we don't have like the, the means of the access to play football.

But when you're in like fifth grade, how much you want to just do nothing, be absolutely like those guys. Mm-hmm. And I was like, I wonder if I can pull it off, but the coaches were like, helmet's on the whole game. I was like, God, dang, we can't do anything cool, man. Nope. Just wanted to be an NFL guy.

So bad. Can I wear different socks? Can I wear long white socks pro style? Bro, I did that. I had the, I had the maroon, the maroon joints that went, you know, all the way up to your knee, like in your pads. And then I had the long whites that I put on over them. Yeah. And they let it fly?

I didn't care. I was just like, this is, I was like, this is sick. I, I think it looks dope. Pro socks, babe. Yeah. So cool. From Ryan. Commander's helmet numbers.

Thoughts on Commander's helmet numbers. Also, I know you guys have talked about it before, but what's worse than Sunday night football on the West Coast and it's light out, I had darkest shit at your house. dude, I literally thought about this last night, Ryan. I was about to send something out on social, but I was like, I probably already have 10 times. It's just like, it's just like with the Super Bowl. I hate the Super Bowl on the West Coast.

San Diego. Erbs. It can't. Yeah, it can't be February. Pitch black at 445 where we live on the East Coast. And then you're watching the Super Bowl at 6.30. It looks like it's noon. I hate it.

I can't stand it. It makes me not want to watch it at all. I'm like, is this, was this filmed yesterday? Like, right. It doesn't feel real. Yeah. But you know what I do love that I was thinking about last night? I love, you know, when you're starting to get into the holiday,

spooky season, holiday season, when you're watching that 425 CBS game. And in the first quarter, it's already dark. I love that. At the game. Yeah, dude. Mm-hmm. they're playing in Pittsburgh or they're playing in Bitsburgh or they're playing in

Baltimore 425 kickoff 5 minutes into the first quarter already dark out there fuck yeah dude you're like is this the night game oh this is the 425 game it's just really dark out Merry Christmas

Give me some white chicken chili Let me watch Charlie Brown after this Chicken chili smack my ass With a pot of white chicken chili so tempted I've never been tempted by anything more in my life than white chicken chili

at the cheesecake factory I'm like should I like it's a lot I'm like no no what else was it oh helmet numbers hate helmet numbers

except Alabama but they still are annoying even on Alabama I kind of was digging the commanders one's line yeah I don't know man I'd rather those

I'd rather be on there than that fucking block ass W that they have. They did such a bad, have a secondary logo. Helmet numbers, the first time I saw them was on Remember the Titans. So I'm like, that's some old, like, yeah.

And Alabama's the only, like, school I can kind of pulled off because they're like old. Yeah. Traditional. You know what I mean? Just Bear Bryant. Just the first college football program of all time. Like, you guys, you can have that one.

But everybody else, like, when the, when the when the chargers do it I'm like bro new team new players cool quarterback number on the helmet with a new get out of here man you don't like the black charger number on the helmet no I think that's pretty dope it's cool if they throw it all the way back to like powder blue ladenian tomlinson with the number then it's like okay this is throwbacks yeah but when they do it with the new stuff. I'm like, dude, wrong era. I don't know. Yeah, no, you're right. Last one here. Let's go to Andrew says Dan Campbell, Stone Cold Steve Austin. Same guy. I mean, he is going for that.

Good. Yeah. It says, a long time listener, love the pod. Thanks. I have to say that the people need new Johnson and Schmiddy videos. I have my best friend hooked on the pod and the easiest entrance was that we had already shared those videos for years. He's right. He's got a point. He's got a point. This is what it is. Oh, wow.

Yeah, but soon, soon. But see, that's, I love that. Because if you do it so often, then it just loses its flavor. But when you hit him with it, when they're at least expecting it, I feel like that's what bangs the most. Anyways, I appreciate that, Andrew.

Thanks. And tell your buddy, thanks as well. Anyways, I was wondering if you all can play football for any SEC school, who would it be and why? By the way, Florida is not a Jordan school. If Tim Tebow wore Nike, you're a Nike school. Slap my ass with Stephen Garcia's playbook wristband

covered in wax from my signature candle, crispy autumn aroma. That smells like a crisp fall morning, apple cider donuts, hint of bonfire with a width of opening a brand new pack of Nike elite socks. Oh my God. My wife walks in and asks, stay you know about this?

Come to Charleston, South Carolina. Deuce McAllister. God. I fucking love you guys. It's amazing. Oh, my God. Love Charleston, too. What an email.

Frame the email. All right, Ben, you go first. If you could play for an SEC school. Who would it be in why? SEC. Who's in it? Good call. Honestly, who is in it?

I don't even know anymore. Vanderbilt, Alabama. Yeah, they added Oklahoma and Texas and that's it. I got to look this up, man. Vandy, Tennessee, Kentucky, South Carolina, Georgia, Florida, Bama, LSU, Arkansas, Missouri, Texas, A&M, Texas, Oklahoma. You know it's got to be a Nike school. Auburn.

He said you can't be Florida. And Texas is fun. No, no, no. He said, by the way, Florida is not a Jordan school. He didn't say he couldn't be Florida. I got like a soft spot for, I know who you're going to pick. God, Missouri. would be fun. Missouri, Texas,

for some reason, Kentucky, too. I don't want to be topped here. I don't want to be top tier. I think I want to be the guy. Am I a five-star recruit? Am I a quarterback? What am I? Whatever you want to be, man.

Five-star recruit, weirdly, best quarterback ever, weirdly goes to Kentucky. Signs. Kentucky hat. Changing the SEC forever. It's my pick. Just colors, uniforms, locations.

kind of a mix of all that don't know why want to be the next temp couch just I don't know I don't know I was just feeling it just in the moment

you know tomorrow might be Texas but yeah I just saw there's something about Kentucky for me that's like

man why aren't they good like come on come on I know you got it that running back that the Steelers got from Kentucky a couple years ago

Benny Snell He was good, bro That dude was nice in college Yeah, you hate him now Because he didn't produce For the Steelers But he was good in college And his name is Benny

That's probably why I remember He had the cool Dada Supreme mouthpiece with the spin-y He was just sick Benny Snow football I'd go to LSU Yeah

Obviously But if I didn't go to LSU I hate to say it But some about like, you know, if Tennessee's really good, you're God. If you make Tennessee really good, you are taking care of forever. And I went to their campus last year and it was fucking beautiful. Knoxville was awesome. When is Tennessee going to do it?

Like I just want it. It's like, I just want Tennessee to win one so everybody can shut up. Like, finally, bro. don't act all big and bad when you win the national championship Tennessee because it's been so long it's one of those that Rocky Top is so fucking annoying

if you're not a part of it but I feel like if you were the fucking captain leading the charge and that place is going crazy with Rocky Top after you score touchdown yeah talk to me it was kind of last year when they were kind of going insane right two years ago

two years ago they were like undefeated they're like beating people and they did that the all black and they did the rocky top intro and it was like oh my god is the real thing yeah and then hooker and jalen hyatt and then hey he got hurt and i lost the south carolina just wasn't true Tennessee all blacks look good though for Halloween they do it for Halloween Halloween yeah nice all right cool appreciate you guys keep sending a man team these guys sorry i know you hate that team these guys at gmail dot com that com come. Always appreciate that.

Like I said, have been saying, we've got more and more ratings on Applepods every week. Love that. That means you're like Andrew and you sent it to a friend and you guys loved it because we talked about J. Feedler. So keep doing that. Subscribe on YouTube. These guys Clubhouse on YouTube video pod every week. You can watch us hang out with us, see Ben's jerseys, see my Steelers gear every week

or my Michael Myers mask. I don't know. It's holiday man now. So I'll probably be wearing some of that stuff. My sweaters? Who knows? Yeah, Ben, what do you got? shows coming up

San Diego next Thursday November 7th Buffalo November 14th Phoenix December 5th get your tickies send it to a friend

send a pod to a friend we'll have a Johnson and Schmidtie coming out soon maybe a little holiday version but this is when these guys gets good peak holiday rate it review it

in the comments underneath for YouTube top five crowd pop yeah happy Halloween everybody you know it's over but Sean Alexander Matt Light wow

wow